Rabbit Troop Sucks

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Transmitting from Denver, Colorado, lifelong friends Paul and Mike (and guests) examine obscure, forgotten about and often overlooked films.

Paul and Mike


    • Apr 25, 2025 LATEST EPISODE
    • weekly NEW EPISODES
    • 1h 25m AVG DURATION
    • 152 EPISODES


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    Latest episodes from Rabbit Troop Sucks

    The Quick and the Dead

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 25, 2025 75:17


    The Quick Draw Competition is on! This is the only way to seek sanctioned justice, make a lot of cash and/or is a way to make a name for yourself. In this town, everyone's got a story, and everyone's got a reason. It's all kind of a crappy town that nobody really wants to live in. Sam Raimi directs this gunslinger's paradise. There is an entire cast worthy of checking out here. Ellen (Sharon Stone), Cort (Russell Crowe), Kid (Leonardo DiCaprio), Sgt. Cantrell (Keith David), Ace (Lance Henriksen), etc… make sure they're all handy with the steel. Overseeing and dominating the competition is Herod (Gene Hackman), a villain with an interesting sense of rivalry and integrity. RTS rustles up a drink or two at the saloon. Ask for Horace (Pat Hingle). La-Mar and Collin bet on all the right brackets – they're on a money train! All aboard! If you've got the grit, see this through. 

    Men at Work

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 18, 2025 77:14


    Carl Taylor (Charlie Sheen) and James St. James (Emilio Estevez) are two sanitation workers who create as much of a mess as they are collecting. Due to their apathetic work ethics, they are now being observed by Louis Fedders (Keith David) to see if they can even do their jobs correctly. Through a series of events, one including Carl peeping on all of his neighbors through binoculars, the mayor is killed, shoved into an industrial barrel and is found on Carl and James' route. Susan (Leslie Hope) was working for the mayor and now needs to be warned. Carl does just that as he starts to fall for her. A pizza delivery man (Dean Cameron) unwillingly joins this group, and everyone is set on taking down Maxwell Potterdam III (John Getz) and his environmental polluting ways. RTS acknowledges the sacredness of another man's fries and would not dare to take them. Jeremy, La-Mar and Collin check out a taser on the beach. When you recover from that, make sure to provide everyone with a proper golf clap. 

    Better Off Dead

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 11, 2025 91:41


    It's our 150th episode! Thanks for listening! Paul acknowledges the unfortunate title and dedicates this episode to the life and birthday of his friend McKenzie. At the end of the episode, there is a song of theirs from many years ago. We hope you give it a listen. Lane Meyer (John Cusack) has been recently dumped by Beth (Amanda Wyss), his dad (David Ogden Stiers) demands he remedies the ‘tasty' car that lays dominant in an “auto cocoon” in the front yard, his mom (Kim Darby) is boiling bacon until it turns blue, and he can't make the ski team because Roy Stalin (Aaron Dozier) is giving him the high school bully treatment. Although Lane might feel hopeless and that life is meaningless at the moment, with a bit of encouragement and confidence he finds from Monique (Diane Franklin), Lane will realize “language lessons” are worth fighting for. RTS makes sure to pay their two dollars and eat some “fraunch bread.” Jeremy and La-Mar try "pure snow" with Charles De Mar (Curtis Armstrong). Then they try some “monster eggnog” that's made with lighter fluid. Emily gets a coat made from real aardvark fur and a stack of TV dinners. Collin hits the K-12 to show us all how it's done! “He's skiing on one ski!” Music by: Sigh, Growl. Happy Birthday, Kenz! XO

    Street Fighter

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 4, 2025 77:52


    Street fights to determine true fighting mastery! Traveling country to country to find the best of the best! Fireballs! You aren't finding any of that here! Instead of what you are used to (and expecting), you get a story about Colonel Guile (Jean-Claude Van Damme) trying to save hostages, a reporter, Chun-Li (Ming-Na Wen), trying to break a story and petty criminals, Ken (Damian Chapa) and Ryu (Byron Mann), doing nonsensical things. Luckily, Cammy (Kylie Minogue) is cheery and willing to see this mission through. Together, they plan to take down the feared warlord M. Bison (Raul Julia) and his genetic testing and ridiculous Bison dollars. RTS harnesses their ki energy and Hadoken blasts all evil. Jeremy, La-Mar and Hazel admire Bison's leisure attire and bone chandelier. Join us for Zangief's realizations, wonky sets and Bison's sad clown painting. Oh, Raul, you deserved better! Sonic Boom! 

    Old School

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 28, 2025 81:44


    Mitch (Luke Wilson) has learned some interesting and startling news about his girlfriend Heidi (Juliette Lewis). Now, working his way through these revelations, he relocates and rents a house near a university. Mitch's friends, Beanie (Vince Vaughn) and Frank (Will Ferrell), use this as an opportunity to make a party house to escape their adult lives. Snoop shows up! “Snoop-a-loop.” When Dean Pritchard tries to shut it all down, these three form a fraternity and do their best to keep the new pledges from being expelled, and they keep the good times going. RTS plans to go to Home Depot after the party. Maybe they'll go to Bed, Bath, & Beyond. They don't know if they'll have enough time. La-Mar celebrates and honors Joseph “Blue” Pulaski (Patrick Cranshaw). “You're my boy, Blue!” Jeremy takes a deep listen to The Dan Band. Collin astonishes us all with his ribbon performance. Hazel talks shop and all things tranquilizers with Peppers (Seann William Scott) on this meet cute. If things get too humorous in this fun flick, earmuffs! 

    Weird Science

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 21, 2025 79:36


    John Hughes helms this fun 80s flick. We've got a couple of nerds, Gary (Anthony Michael Hall) and Wyatt (Ilan Mitchell-Smith), attending Shermer High School, and they just want to become popular. We know the story. But, did you think Frankenstein would inspire these two to “hack the planet” with their computer and create what they think is the perfect woman, Lisa (Kelly LeBrock)? Well, they do! The plan was simple. They want to shower with a woman, hit the city for drinks and some nightlife, and then they want to party. These two will get exactly what they want, but they are going to be shown some lessons along the way. Do they learn them? Probably not! Wyatt's brother Chet (Bill Paxton) will try to enforce his own rules as well. RTS hangs out at the Kandy Bar and learns about the “family jewels.” La-Mar, Collin and Jeremy take on a Mad Max horde and make sure their party guests have a night to remember. When you are trying to recreate the “science” at home, make sure not to forget the doll. Also, make sure the water isn't running all day while combing your hair. 

    30 Days of Night

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 14, 2025 82:50


    In Alaska, amongst rolling snowstorms, the town of Barrow enters their month-long night. Only a fraction of the town stays to stick it out. Soon, a stranger (Ben Foster) arrives and creates havoc – especially with the town's ability to communicate. If this wasn't enough, a bunch of vampires in suits show up and just destroy everyone! Sheriff Eben Oleson (Josh Hartnett) and the fire marshal, Stella (Melissa George), round up a handful of survivors in an attempt to hide throughout the town to survive until the sun rises again. Also, Beau Brower (Mark Boone Junior) goes on a much-needed vampire kill-spree. RTS makes the best of this end of winter month of darkness by watching a film about a month of darkness. Very meta! Jeremy and Collin throw a bunch of these blood-sucking demons into a metal masher. La-Mar asks a nice vampire child for a bag of chips at the general store. He gets them! Sometimes, you just have to ask nicely. Nemo and Rami go the old-fashioned route and simply explode vampire heads. That is VERY effective! Eat your can of cherries and stay warm tonight. Nighty night. Don't let the vampires bite. 

    Abraxas, Guardian of the Universe

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 7, 2025 77:00


    Former governor of Minnesota and now a 10,000-year-old alien law enforcer, Abraxas (Jesse Ventura), is doing his “best” to apprehend Secundus (Sven-Ole Thorsen) because he's running around Earth trying to impregnate women for a child to produce the Anti-Life Equation. It's the path to immortality! After Secundus puts his hand on the first woman's stomach he sees, we have a baby! 5 years later, after this child has grown a bit, these alien goons are back at it on Earth – lots of running through the woods. There are some useless officers with pointless backstories. Secundus orders breakfast. Sonia (Majorie Bransfield) develops feelings that no one cares about. RTS makes sure to disable their Answer Boxes because they want to party. La-Mar and Jeremy make sure no one will harm the Culmator. Our world depends on it. Or it doesn't. Everything is unclear here. The only thing you might need to guard against is this film. 

    The Last Dragon

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 28, 2025 115:16


    Leroy Green (Taimak) has been dumped by his martial arts master so he can unlock the next level in his training – the Glow. While trying to find his inner power, Laura (Vanity) tries to unlock other inner feelings he has as well. Good thing Leroy is hanging around because Vanity has multiple kidnap attempts from a corrupt music promoter. Meanwhile, Sho'nuff (Julius Carry) will stop at nothing for an epic confrontation and Converse kissing with Leroy. There will be Glow EVERYWHERE! Ah, yes, to be young in NYC in the 80s. This is exactly how it was! RTS masters eating popcorn with chopsticks. La-Mar, Collin and Lucor reminisce over the “King of Colfax” and groove to this awesome soundtrack. We just hope you “jack ‘em up, buddy!”

    Star Knight

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 21, 2025 77:19


    Cosmic fella who can't breathe the same air as his love is in a real dilemma. This stellar tale of love is as old as the cosmos. Ix (Miguel Bosé) is not a starman, and he's not waiting in the sky. He's collecting the spirits of animals – as you do. When Princess Alba (Maria Lamor) goes swimming in the nude, Star Knight takes her into the “dragon.” Klever (Harvey Keitel) doesn't like that! And, he wants to be knighted. With the aid of Fray Lupo (Fernando Rey), these two idiots will accomplish nothing along the way. If you can see anything in this film, you just passed an eye exam. RTS tells their doctor, Boetius (Klaus Kinski), that they need some kind of elixir of immortality. Jeremy falls in love with this entire film production. La-Mar takes on the Green Knight. Collin now communicates through a series of hums and beeps. We hope you see your seven spirits. 

    Blast from the Past

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 14, 2025 82:51


    You are cordially invited to an epic Guy-entine's Day. Fill your cups up with mimosas and grab a handful of chocolate hearts. We did! Adam (Brendon Fraser) has grown up in a fallout shelter. His parents, Calvin (Christopher Walken) and Helen (Sissy Spacek), hid there in what they thought was a nuclear blast. Now, 35 years later, the vault is open, and Adam is sent into the modern world above to gather supplies and information. Adam immediately falls for Eve (Alicia Silverstone), but will she be charmed by his chivalrous ways of the past? It's a Rom-Com, so you can bet on it! RTS starts an ice-cream cult. Jeremy, La-Mar and Collin bathe in cheap perfume and offer plush teddy bears and cardboard-aftertaste candies. Don't get your heart broken. But, if it happens, we'll help you put it back together. U R Sweet! 

    The Longest Yard (1974)

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 7, 2025 84:42


    It's time for an American sporting tradition as old as this tradition itself. Tradition activated! Super Bowl time! Get your favorite snacks and peeps together. We hope your favorite teams do the things you want them to do. No slobberknockers necessary. A disgraced football player, Paul Crewe (Burt Reynolds), spirals out of control and lands himself in prison. Once there, a delusional warden (Eddie Albert) forces Crewe to train a group of inmates to take on the guards led by Captain Knauer (Ed Lauter). The warden wants these inmates to feel the pain of the game and to obey his authority without question. The warden is a metaphor for everyone's life! Stick it to the warden and live free! RTS lives mustache-shaved lifestyles and shines bright with the radness. Collin and Jeremy have deep conversations over toilet wine and prison cheese. These are bonds that cannot be broken - unlike human bones.

    Snakes on a Plane

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 31, 2025 82:49


    From the get-go, you need to know there was NO other option than putting a bunch of poisonous snakes on a plane, time releasing them and amping them up with some pheromones. Is Eddie Kim (Byron Lawson) the Joker? Neville Flynn (Samule L. Jackson) is doing his best to protect his key witness, Sean (Nathan Phillips), from these slithering, fanged horrors. Claire (Julianna Margulies) wants to survive her last day at work. The MVP is Troy (Kenan Thompson)! We have a feeling he's going to get us to L.A. If you're a passenger not playing games, eating snacks or becoming a member of the Mile High Club, take a nap – it will be your last. RTS just avoids getting on the plane altogether. They hang tight in the control tower with cool drinks in snake-free locations. La-Mar and Jeremy taze snakes and air-blast them out the windows. Sammy J has had it with these snakes and this plane – and something about someone's mom. 

    Kung Fu Hustle

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 24, 2025 78:23


    Happy Lunar New Year! It's the year of the snake, and it's time for reflection, growth and careful decision-making. Sing (Stephen Chow) experiences all of this. In 1940's Shanghai, Sing and his friend Bone (Tze-Chung Lam) try and fail at grifting their way into a housing complex. They turn to the Axe Gang for assistance and recruitment, and they fail at that as well. The Axe Gang is also extremely unhappy with the powers that Landlord (Wah Yuen) and Landlady (Qiu Yuen) have because they are able to defend where they live. The gang then break an undefeated killer, The Beast (Siu-Lung Leung), out of an asylum to seek vengeance. Once Sing realizes what is right and when he stops robbing Fong (Shengyi Huang) and her ice-cream money, he is able to harness his chi and become the kung fu genius these citizens need. True ultimate power! RTS checks out the local cuisine. La-Mar takes flight and jumps off an eagle. Jeremy attempts to roundhouse his way out of a “class 3 kill storm.” Look inward and find what you need. 

    Fletch

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 17, 2025 80:19


    Irwin “Fletch” Fletcher (Chevy Chase) is an undercover newspaper reporter investigating excess drug trafficking on the beach. The police and high-ranking officials might be involved. What's going on in this city? While Fletch is sleuthing, Alan Stanwyk (Tim Matheson) offers him 50K to kill him. It's an insurance thing! Through a series of amazing disguises, one-liners, stealth and a bit of luck, Fletch is going to do his best to put all of these pieces together and to get his story out on time. “Bit by bit. One way or another.” Also, he needs to borrow Gail's (Dana Wheeler-Nicholson) towel because his car just hit a water buffalo. RTS shows you that it's all done with ball bearings. Jeremy, Collin and La-Mar saw a manure-spreader that jackknifed on the Santa Ana. God awful mess. You should see their shoes. Enjoy this film with “a Bloody Mary, a steak sandwich and a steak sandwich.”

    Cabin Boy

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 10, 2025 74:15


    When Hazel's mom, Carolyne, requests Cabin Boy, you get on that! Nathanial Mayweather (Chris Elliot) is a snob and a real jerk. But, he is a fancy lad. After he boards the wrong boat, he is trapped amongst the crew (Ritch Brinkley, James Gammon, Brian Doyle-Murray and Brion James) who despise him. Nathanial desperately wants to get to Hawaii to meet up with his richy-rich father. Along the way, the crew pick up Trina (Melora Walters), and Nathanial is insta-smitten. With a little luck, this cabin boy will become a cabin man. RTS searches the seas for love and wigs. Hazel, Jeremy and Collin fight an ice monster and a giant. When you have a moment of downtime, sample some fish stick kitties. 

    Real Genius

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 3, 2025 80:31


    It's a new year! Let's open it by celebrating the 40th anniversary of Real Genius. You deserve it! Mitch Taylor (Gabriel Jarret) is a 15-year-old prodigy who has been accepted into a university to work on a freakin' laser. He gets to work with legendary genius (and outlandish) Chris Knight (Val Kilmer) on this project. Mitch wants Chris to focus. Chris wants Mitch to loosen up. It's like a pair of opposite lasers. That's a thing, right? Meanwhile, some guy (Jon Gries) has been disappearing in their closet. Psssst. His name is Lazlo. Why were they designing this laser to begin with? HATHAWAY (William Atherton)! He must have a doctorate in being a scamp. He's been taking military funding for his department and using it for his house renovations. RTS sled down dorm hallways made of ice. Collin and Jeremy swim through mounds of popcorn. “Pop pop!”

    Last Action Hero

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 27, 2024 91:18


    Do you have a golden ticket? Do you want to sing about it? Danny (Austin O'Brien) has been given a magical one. It was originally from Houdini. While watching a midnight screener of his favorite action star, Jack Slater (Arnold Schwarzenegger), Danny is transported into the film. Now, he serves as a comedic sidekick in a zany fantasy world based on Hollywood tropes. Benedict (Charles Dance) gets his hands on the ticket and uses it for strange and somewhat undefined purposes. All of this spills back into the real world while Jack learns bullets and punching things hurt. There might be other lessons, but that's not what it's all about. RTS get some valuable insight from Death (Ian McKellen). He makes a mean Old Fashioned. Jeremy, Collin and La-Mar hang with Whiskers (Danny Devito) and get the end of the year party started. Let's celebrate with this underrated flick everyone has been asking for. Cheers!

    Die Hard 2

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 24, 2024 78:43


    A bonus holiday episode! What!? Can't keep a good holiday down! We'll visit the past to talk in our present, and you can listen in our future. John McClane (Bruce Willis) is back! Back but in D.C. to see the in-laws for Christmas. And he's now LAPD? But Dulles was actually filmed at the old Stapleton airport in Denver! Baddies are everywhere! Planes are running out of fuel. Reporters are trying to get the inside scoop. A reindeer is supposed to arrive! McClane is just trying to pick up his wife. Between the terrorist acts led by Colonel Stuart (William Sadler), secret soldier missions with Major Grant (John Amos) and shoddy police work with Carmine Lorenzo (Dennis Franz), McClane is going to have to adhere to all of these ghosts' advice and warnings or he may never change. He also icicle-stabs a guy in the eye! RTS dance it up at Old Fezziwg's. Jeremy and Collin make sure that there is enough prize turkey for all.“Yippie kayak other buckets.”

    Gremlins

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 20, 2024 87:24


    Happy holidays, everyone! It's time for winter, and it's time for another Joe Dante film. The year of Dante continues on! After daddy/the father (Hoyt Axton) sneaks off with a Mogwai from Chinatown, he gifts it to his son, Billy (Zach Galligan), just before Christmas. There are some rules that need to be followed for Gizmo (the Mogwai). Within a day, Billy amazingly disregards these rules, and now this once adorable cuddle fluff has multiplied into a horde of mischievous monsters running amuck within town. Somehow, Kate (Phoebe Cates) is forced to bartend these creatures. Kinda seems like a fun time. Meanwhile, Pete (Corey Feldman) and the rest of town try to defend themselves. RTS contemplates which gremlin can hang out on the podcast. La-Mar, Jeremy and Collin throw gremlins into pools with reckless abandon. These creatures might replace the family dog! Have fun and avoid BRIGHT LIGHT! BRIGHT LIGHT!

    Santa's Slay

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 13, 2024 75:14


    Santa Claus is coming to town! Also, he hates you, children and all that is good. So, little known fact, Santa (Bill Goldberg) is actually the demon son of Satan and Ericka. After losing a bet to an angel, Santa has been forced to bear gifts and be jolly for a thousand years. Now, that timeline is up! Nicolas (Douglas Smith) is a young, hapless doof in the dating department, but somehow his hot-to-go work friend, Mary/”Mac”(Emilie de Ravin), is going to help him out. ‘Tis the season! As Mac helps Nicolas learn about giving, Grandpa (Robert Culp) will reveal his true past and help take down the red menace. Pastor Timmons (Dave Thomas) will be at Gold Diggers. RTS hang out in the bunker with hot chocolate and holiday cheer. Jeremy, La-Mar, Collin and Hazel Bazooka-blast some flying demon reindeer! Also, Collin wants to remind you that “Christmas can scare the Dickens out of you.”

    Strange Brew

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 6, 2024 82:18


    A gigantic thank you to our listener, Jim, for requesting this fizzy-comedic flick. Bob (Rick Moranis) and Doug McKenzie (Dave Thomas) somehow obtain jobs at the Elsinore Brewery. Between the free beer and beer-related tasks they are in charge of, these hosers just reached heaven. Unfortunately, Brewmeister Smith (Max von Sydow) is planning to brainwash everyone with his mind-controlling beer serum. It's time for global domination! Pam (Lynne Griffin) is trying to take over for her dad – her ghost dad? With a little help from Jean LaRose (Angus MacInnes) and a bit of buffoonery from Claude (Paul Dooley), beer might be had! Wait, is that the goal? We'll figure it out along the way. RTS hangs out with Ted (Brian McConnachie) and plays some gloomy keyboard sequences. La-Mar, Collin and Jeremy are going to have to drink their way out of this mess. Don't be a knob and join us as we take on some sudsy villainy! 

    Son in Law

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 28, 2024 90:51


    Visit the Shore[s] this Thanksgiving! We hope you all had/are having wonderful holidays! Did you “chow down and munch on some grindage”? Too much food? Too much family? Too much indulgence? Wash it all down with another pie or two. We've got a holiday tale to get to. Rebecca Warner (Carla Gugino) leaves her small town in South Dakota for UCLA. School is going well, but, socially, she is having a hard time adjusting. Rebecca befriends strange and erratic Crawl (Pauly Shore), and she decides to invite him home for Thanksgiving break. The Warner family might not be ready for this level of, uh, energy. Hell, the entire town might not be ready. Dad (Lane Smith) is having the hardest time. But, that's the Shore magic! He brings everyone together. There's magic and Tracy (Tiffani Thiessen) dancing! Town miracle! RTS avoid getting weezed and look for fresh nugs. Jeremy, Collin and La-Mar test out their Steven Tyler pajamas. Don't let it tweak your melon! 

    Shoot 'Em Up

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 22, 2024 77:54


    A huge thank you to our listener, Jake, for requesting this Gun-Fu epic! Mr. Smith (Clive Owen) doesn't like that some randos are trying to put a baby mama in the corner – and then the baby in a corner too! Nope! Gun mode level 12! These goons didn't know Smith is a gun-god! Most of these thugs go down quickly, but these bosses don't like Smith interfering. Smith, with concerns for the child, seeks the aid of Donna (Monica Bellucci) to keep this newborn safe. While sleuthing together, a bit of a mystery is unraveled. Also, there is a sex shoot-out! Behind the scenes, Hertz (Paul Giamatti) has some other plans going on. RTS join Death (Julian Richings) while driving everyone around. La-Mar makes sure to Home Alone warehouses while taking down hordes of crumb bums for hire. Make sure to grab a bunch of carrots to pregame for this nonstop bullet bonanza! 

    The Perfect Weapon

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 15, 2024 85:08


    Our friend Reg (Cubicle Comrades podcast) requested and joins us for his Rabbit Troop Sucks debut, and you'll see his distraction knife. Then, it's too late! Jeff Sanders (Jeff Speakman) has a lot of anger and a lot of flashbacks stored inside himself. So many flashbacks! Snap! “It's getting' kinda hectic.” Through his training in Kenpo, he tries to temper all of this. Master Lo (Seth Sakai) sends him on a lifelong quest to become a man. When the Korean mafia kills his friend Kim (Mako), the rage bubbles over. Through the guidance of Yung (James Hong), Jeff tries to seek vengeance. But, is this the way? Jimmy (Dante Basco) is there for the assist! Bangarang! Professor Toru Tanaka is going to try to slowly get you! Oh, and Mariska Hargitay is in this film! RTS make sure to combine the Kenpo sticks, especially at the Croc-Pit Club. You have to! La-Mar, Jeremy and Collin will show you the way of the dragon, but will you see it? Whatever your answer, that's so tiger of you!

    Over The Top

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 8, 2024 80:43


    Thank you to our listener, Hillary, for requesting this film that is ripe with the top. Many have taken this as a tutorial on being a power top. Lincoln Hawk (Sylvester Stallone) has been gone, but now he's back! He's got the green light from his hospitalized wife, Christina (Susan Blakely), that he can reconnect with his son, Michael (David Mendenhall). Time for an epic father and son road trip! Homies for life! And, Linc shows Mike the ways of the road and the strong arm – truck apparatus and all. You know who doesn't like any of this? Granpaps! Jason Cutler (Robert Loggia) is going to attempt to shut down the fun all along the way. Only an arm-wrestling competition with major prizes will settle this score. Watch out for Bull (Rick Zumwalt)! Someone is going to have to get the strap. RTS glisten with the best of them. Jeremy swallows a lit cigar and tries to own you. Hazel makes her Rabbit Troop Sucks debut by drinking some motor oil and breaking some wrists. One way or another, get in on this big rig of an adventure! 

    Iron Eagle

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 1, 2024 84:32


    Thank you to our listener, Ryan, for requesting this high-flying amazingness. Doug (Jason Gedrick) dreams of being a fighter pilot just like his father. His father (Tim Thomerson) is shot down and captured, and it seems that the U.S. government isn't moving quickly enough to rescue him. Now, he's got three days to live, and Doug will gain the Obi Wan wisdom of Chappy (Louis Gossett Jr.). With the aid of all of Doug's friends, some light hacking, moving some F-16s and rockets around, they forge a friendship and a rescue plan that just might work. Also, all of this is extremely illegal and seems unlikely. But, hell, it's time to fly like an eagle. An iron eagle! RTS strap reel-to-reel tape decks to their legs, and they let the rock flow. La-Mar, Collin and Jeremy hot dog every-which-way. When are they not hot doggin' around? “This one's for you, Chappy.” 

    The Frighteners

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 30, 2024 112:58


    Welcome back to another SUPER HALLOWEEN SPOOKTACULAR episode! Happy Halloween from RTS! Frank Bannister (Michael J. Fox), after an accident, has the ability to communicate with the deceased. Of course, using these powers to scare up some profits is going to be the first order of business. Lucy (Trini Alvarado) just lost her husband and is open to Frank's ghost-vibe. Things seem to go well, but now, a death-like apparition is killing the people of Fairwater. It's truly heart crushing. Agent Milton Dammers (Jeffrey Combs) has his own theories about these mysterious deaths, and he has a lead plated vest. Frank, his ghost pals and his offroad driving might be the way to put a stop to it. RTS need an out-of-body experience right now. La-Mar, Jeremy, Collin and Rami all make sure they're not another number in the kill spree. Get ready for some spooky film trivia. “What about the guy in the toilet? What did he do to you?”

    Silver Bullet

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 25, 2024 79:11


    “I saw a werewolf with a Chinese menu in his hand.” What we are dealing with here is not hunger. People are in danger. You know this small town is not going to let a bunch of violent murders go on. Who is doing this? Human? Animal? Everyone is upset and taking it in their own hands. In the middle of the night, after sneaking out, Marty (Corey Haim) witnesses the truth. This is a monster! Luckily, he escapes, but only barely, after this encounter. With the aid of his sister, Jane (Megan Follows), Marty desperately tries to convince Uncle Red (Gary Busey) of what has been really happening in town. Uncle Red, beyond his better judgement, agrees to assist the duo with their supernatural conspiracies. We're glad he did. RTS avoids the rolling fog marsh lands during the full moon. Collin, La-Mar and Jeremy meet “a sort of wizard in weapons.” Get this Stephen King work on your list! “I saw a werewolf drinking a pina colada at Trader Vic's. His hair was perfect.”

    Death Spa

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 18, 2024 79:48


    Everything is very la-di-da – at the death spa. Worry not, if you become cut up or even haunted, you'll get a few months for free. Michael Evens (William Bumiller) can make all of your dreams come true. Well, your gym dreams. His wife Catherine (Shari Shattuck) died a year ago. He thinks that's a bummer, but with the comfort of Laura (Brenda Bakke), he's been doing okay. And, in the gym business in the 80s, things moved fast! Now we have some kind of phantasm going all Scobby-kill-you-do where people want to work out. Or party. Or touch. Twin-sibling of Catherine, David (Merritt Butrick), was at home hacking. It's all cool. PS: GHOST! RTS take in a nice ethereal soak after their extreme workouts. Jeremy, Collin and La-Mar grab some juice mixers and enjoy the party. Too bad the roof is now really on fire! Is this gym membership worth your soul? Probably! 

    Buffy the Vampire Slayer

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 11, 2024 78:24


    We thank our listener, Jenna, and their fine request for this film. We all had a lot of fun watching this. Buffy (Kristy Swanson) has been chosen! She has some powers and some past lives, and now it's time to send these fanged-sob's right back into the ground! But, she'll do it while ninja-kicking, heart-stabbing and accessorizing. Everyone wants some of Buffy's time! Teen drama alert! Pike (Luke Perry) wants some special time. Awww! Lothos (Rutger Hauer) wants bitey-kill time! Merrick (Donald Sutherland) is trying to make up for lost training time. And, Amilyn (Paul Reubens) gets some staby time. There is very little time for cheerleading practice because of this. RTS are likely to accept invitations to graveyards from strangers. Where and when? Collin and La-Mar try not to get “thrashed” and split a hot dog. Cover your necks and be careful who you invite inside – especially if they're floating. Fulfill your destiny! 

    Halloween III: Season of the Witch

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 4, 2024 88:40


    Welcome to October fun month! No Michael Myers here. Beloved company Silver Shamrock just wants to celebrate Halloween by making the world's coolest masks. Dr. Daniel Challis/”Dr. Bang” (Tom Atkins) can't let being a tomcat in the city be enough. So, he takes his dead patient's daughter, Ellie (Stacey Nelkin), to explore where these masks are coming from. Yes, there are dudes ripping faces off and then dousing themselves in gasoline and exploding themselves. People may or may not have smuggled Stonehenge here. Conal Cochran (Dan O'Herlihy) won't reveal his tricks but will walk you through everything. And Ellie, She's old enough for the Doc. “I'm older than I look.” “What's that?” “Who cares?” In the end, a company just wants Halloween to be fun for you and your family. RTS are going to laser button everyone in town! Face melt! Rami, Jeremy and La-Mar sip on the “champagne of beers” while making bad decisions and inappropriate payphone calls. Make sure to investigate your demon microchip masks and get ready for a road trip to “The factory” in Santa Mira.

    The Ice Pirates

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 27, 2024 76:53


    Attempting to do a line of ice. You're watching Miami Vice! Doing this thing again, being nice. Failed once. I'll try it twice. Jason (Robert Urich) and Roscoe (Michael D. Roberts) know exactly how it is. You have to hustle – and maybe do questionable things. Space questionable! They have an entire crew. It includes Maida (Angelica Huston), what!? Zeno (Ron Perlman) whips up some alien Thanksgiving fun! Even Killjoy (John Matuszak), “Sloth Loves Chunk,” comes along for the ride. The “ride” is to get some ice. Water is the currency of the day. Sorry, future currency/future day! Princess Karina (Mary Crosby) just wants to see dad. RTS jump time back and forth. The future is crazy! Have we ever been in the now? La-Mar and Jeremy order a few cold ones at the Pirate's Den. Make sure your belts aren't stiff and buckle up for this space adventure. 

    Explorers

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 20, 2024 82:45


    It's a new season, and it's time for another Joe Dante film. The year of Dante continues! Also, fall is among us! Hoodies! Warm drinks! Jovial spookiness! Yes! Ben Crandall (Ethan Hawke) has been having some interesting dreams as of late. You know, dreams. He details out what he has seen within these tech-heavy visions and shares it with his friend (and all-round man of science), Wolfgang (River Phoenix). Both boys befriend Darren (Jason Presson) and, together, the three craft a spaceship based on dream science and coding being transmitted to them from beyond the stars. Also, Lori (Amanda Swenson) makes some random appearances. What does it all lead to? The only way to solve this interstellar mystery is to explore. RTS reminisces about 80s technology and why you should NOT jump out at kids in the night. La-Mar helicopters around while determined to figure it all out, but he'll probably be at the drive-in most of the time. There's a Starkiller flick to see! Robert Picardo, you're brilliant! Lately, “you know I've been having these weird….” “Dreams?”

    Waterworld

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 13, 2024 88:00


    Merman wants to go with the wind. Merman wants adventure. Merman needs friends? In the future, the world has become, sigh, a water world. Mariner (Kevin Coster) loves yacht rock and boating. When he's not exploring the ocean's depths, he dabbles in herbology. He's just minding his own business when everyone gets into a liquid fuss. Helen's (Jeanne Tripplehorn) daughter has a tattoo map on her back, and it leads to dry land. Land seems cool. Deacon (Dennis Hopper) and his gang-o-dudes (Smokers) want that map because dry land promises have been made. Needless to say, this does not go well for Mariner's rad future boat. RTS explores underwater mysteries and fights off sea monsters. Jeremy, Collin and La-Mar make sure to take down a few hordes of Smokers and enjoy a lime or two. It gets strange on the open ocean. Real strange! Take a ride in an upgradable aircraft and decide if this water adventure is for you. Adieu, summer!

    Tremors

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 6, 2024 76:07


    Val (Kevin Bacon) and Earl (Fred Ward) are tired of their extremely small town, but they just can't seem to get out. It's like a Tom Petty song – almost! A few dead bodies bring them back. The road is blocked and that brings them back. A seismologist, Rhonda (Finn Carter), brings them back. And, of course, the subterranean tremor monsters are bringing them back. Town just isn't safe. They do have fire power though. That's thanks to Burt (Michael Gross) and Heather (Reba McEntire). It's time to teach these creatures a lesson when you're not pole vaulting over them. RTS takes some souvenir photos at Walter's (Victor Wong) store. Collin, Jeremy and La-Mar feel the “trem” from the beginning. They're still feeling it now. They have a bad case of the “trem,” and that's a testament to the fun of the film. Inquiries on cannon fuses are accepted. 

    Summer Rental

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 30, 2024 103:18


    An overworked, burnt-out air-traffic controller, Jack Chester (John Candy) is put on a mandatory summer break. He decides to take his family to Florida for some much-needed rest and relaxation. Things seem positive at first, but as each day passes, things steadily get worse. After a minor boating accident, Jack befriends Scully (Rip Torn) and improves his sailing ability and his self-confidence. When Al Pellet (Richard Crenna) threatens to take the remainder of the Chester's vacation away, you better bet that this will be settled at the regatta. RTS embraces a four-week beach vacation. Collin and La-Mar use their astute powers of observation to make sure everything looks good and real. They feel real! Don't be a squid stick and go have some fun with this film. Enjoy it with Scully's catch of the day. 

    Chopping Mall

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 23, 2024 80:44


    The 80s! What a time to be alive! Technological innovations were regularly being introduced to the public. This includes some sweet kill-bots. We mean security bots. It's cool! Don't worry about it. What better place to showcase these than a mall run by sex-crazed teens who can do anything they want? It's a recipe for fun! When a lightning storm strikes, it converts these adorable droids into cranky death machines. Your security badge isn't going to help you now. Ferdy Meisel (Tony O'Dell) just met someone special, Allison Parks (Kelli Maroney), and he's OG Cobra Kai, so he strikes first. Mike (John Terlesky), who is also Deathstalker, sets up a furniture store sex party. It's all strange. The robots are now on the loose! These metal fuzzies are going to laser beam your heart strings. Beep! Beep! Boop! RTS wanders the mall barefoot at night and contemplates life. La-Mar marvels at the mall's wood paneling and plush red carpets. Emilio makes his Rabbit Troop Sucks debut after taking care of some of this robo-trash. See ya at the food court. We do hope you all “have a nice day.”

    Lucky Number Slevin

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 16, 2024 84:08


    We received this fantastic listener request. Thank you, Trisha! Mistaken identity lands Slevin (Josh Hartnett) in a world of problems. The day was already off to a bad start. Fired! Nowhere to live! Cheated on! Mugged! Meanwhile, crime bosses The Boss (Morgan Freeman) and The Rabbi (Ben Kingsley) have serious beef with each other. Slevin is in the middle of it all because they think he's someone named Nick. This fella is having a rough go at this thing called life. Luckily, Lindsey (Lucy Liu) is able to shed some light on this mystery and swim into everyone's heart. You have a heart, right? And when you aren't a participant in the “Kansas City Shuffle,” you'll have Mr. Goodkat (Bruce Willis) slipping in and out of the shadows. RTS learns the kinder art of revenge. Collin and Jeremy play both sides and then play them again. Someone is going to be betting on some ponies. Is it Stanley Tucci? The Tucc!

    Moving

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 9, 2024 96:45


    No one is a fan of a big move, but, after being laid off, Arlo Pear (Richard Pryor) has a chance to make one to Boise and better the lives of his family. His wife, Monica (Beverly Todd), is on board. His twin sons are too. Even his crazed neighbor, Frank (Randy Quaid), wants the move to happen. Unfortunately, his daughter, Casey (Stacey Dash), is not happy about it. Also, there is a fake job/set up by Gary (Dave Thomas) in the works. The movers are from hell. The new house was gutted. His prized car is mutilated by Brad Williams (Dana Carvey). Arlo has had enough of it all! RTS apply some warpaint and settle some scores. Jeremy, La-Mar and Rami drive the streets in their Mad Max battle vehicles and hunt down some movers. We can all agree, no one wants to find out how it's hanging.

    Zombeavers

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 2, 2024 77:24


    Sometimes girls just want to have fun, and Mary (Rachel Melvin), Zoe (Cortney Palm) and Jenn (Lexi Atkins) are heading towards a weekend of fun. This trip turns sour fast. First, team No Boys Allowed, Sam (Hutch Dano), Tommy (Jake Weary) and Buck (Peer Gilroy), show up. Then, a foot is chomped off. Leave it to these zombie beavers as they knock down trees and make tunnels. Smyth (Rex Linn) is eating chicken and talking nonsense. RTS wade through the pond and rock with those blue-eyed demon beavers. Jeremy, Collin and La-Mar, with the help of Bill Burr and John Mayer, turn this cabin slumber party into an epic weekend to remember forever. Disclaimer: there are radioactive zombie beavers that want to gnaw all of your faces off, but in an angry adorable sort of way.

    Raw Force

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 26, 2024 74:25


    This movie is a love letter to those truly looking for meaning in the artistic world of film. A bunch of martial arts party boys board an anything goes fun-time boat to achieve maximum enjoyment. Mike (Geoffrey O'Malley) and John (John Dresden) are amongst them. They want jolly fun-fun and to check out Warrior Island for some reason. The brochure clearly indicates that this place is haunted AF! Unfortunately, on top of the disgraced zombie hauntings, a nazi wannnabe, Thomas (Ralph Lombardi) is kill-focused for that jade action! Cookie (Jillian Kesner) deserves better than all these clowns! RTS try to get in on that jade trade for cash program. Collin, Jeremy and La-Mar inquire on how thick that jade is. There is a lot going on! When you aren't being eaten by demonic monks or stalked by the supernatural, you might get gobbled up by the piranhas! No one signed up for this kind of booze cruise. But, Warrior Island does seem kind of cool. 

    Heavyweights

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 19, 2024 62:01


    Camp was supposed to be fun! Camp was going to be a good time. Gerry (Aaron Schwartz) learns that he is going to Camp Hope, a camp for boys to lose weight for the summer. Luckily, the camp is overseen by the fun and caring Pat Finley (Tom McGowan) and is filled with amazing guys, including many members of The Mighty Ducks – Roy (Kenan Thompson) is among them. At camp, we also have Tim (Paul Feig) who is a cool camp counselor and first year camp nurse, Julie (Leah Lail). The fun ends when Tony Perkis (Ben Stiller) and his workout lackies buy out the place and try to create an infomercial for Tony's hellish workout program. Someone call Tony's dad! RTS avoid 20-mile “cleanse” hikes and make sure they're “packin'” bullet-Pez candy. La-Mar, Jeremy and Collin bounce from The Blob and enjoy the lakeside. Make sure to keep your friends close this summer, and don't be like Lars (Tom Hodges), “farrrr away.” 

    Clue

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 12, 2024 67:45


    It's our two-year anniversary! Thanks for listening, and make sure to check out this phenomenal film! This is possibly the most fun you'll have with a whodunit. The cast is brilliant! It includes Mrs. Peacock (Eileen Brennan), Wadsworth (Tim Curry), Mrs. White (Madeline Kahn), Professor Plum (Christopher Lloyd), Mr. Green (Michael McKean), Colonel Mustard (Martin Mull) and Miss Scarlet (Lesley Ann Warren). Guests are invited for dinner in a mansion on a rainy night in New England, 1954. As each guest arrives, a mystery is revealed, and Mr. Boddy (Lee Ving) is dead! Classic! RTS hideout in the study with a bottle of brandy. La-Mar finds a secret passage in the library, Collin grabs a bowl of soup in the kitchen before calling the FBI and Jeremy sells us out for a moment with Yvette (Colleen Camp). We'll get to the bottom of it. Any way you end it (and there are multiple endings), you are going to be in for a treat. Thanks again for tuning in!

    No Holds Barred

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 5, 2024 75:26


    It's time to go full Hulk during this 4th weekend! Rip (Hulk Hogan) is a complex man doing charitable things when he's not being the Wrestling Federation champion. Brell (Kurt Fuller) wants to own the best but can't have Rip. He does not like that one bit, so he starts “The Battle of the Tough Guys” and makes sure Zeus (Tom Lister Jr.) gets Rip in the ring for the event of a lifetime. It's all about those ratings! Hasn't it always been? Samantha (Joan Severance) does some stuff and then doesn't. That doesn't seem to matter all too much. Randy (Mark Pellegrino) causes an incident because he hasn't gained his supernatural powers. You'll see the Hulkster on a motorcycle! In a wrestling tuxedo! And, you'll see him in attire your imagination cannot comprehend. “A future ballerina pirate.” You'll see it all! RTS explode! There were too many growls and too much lace. Explode! La-Mar, Jeremy and Collin make sure to keep their cool. It's what the kids needed! Enjoy your July 4th weekend, and keep it classy in the ring, brother!

    Batman

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 28, 2024 101:39


    This Tim Burton directed take on Batman is a must see. You'll be treated to an epic score by Danny Elfman! There are many fun Prince songs as well. Bruce Wayne (Michael Keaton), who is Batman by night, just wants the city of Gotham to be chill. But, that just can't happen! After Jack Napier (Jack Nicholson) becomes the Joker and runs the crime world, things get dangerously chaotic. Vicki Vale (Kim Basinger) is trying to get a photo of Batman but is getting distracted by her romantic feelings for Wayne. The Joker also wants Vale's affections! So many secrets and so much drama! Just don't forget that Bob (Tracy Walter) is your “number one guy.” RTS explore the Batcave and “love that Joker!” La-Mar and Collin check out the art scene and insist you “never rub another man's rhubarb.” Davin loads up his utility belt and makes his Rabbit Troop Sucks debut to clean up Gotham. Make time to check out this trailblazing Batman film. Join us for this extended, batty episode where we discuss all things Batman at the same Bat-time on the same Bat-channel. And, “if you gotta go, go with a smile!” 

    The Burbs

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 21, 2024 89:40


    We are back with more fun from director Joe Dante. Ray Peterson (Tom Hanks) has earned his relaxing summer week off. That's going to be difficult when strange new neighbors move in amongst a cul-de-sac of gossip and snooping. Carol Peterson (Carrie Fisher) just wants to take the family to the lake. When Princess Leia asks, you go! Unfortunately, Mark Rumsfield (Bruce Dern) and Art Weingartner (Rick Ducommun) have some persuasively strong concerns about the new neighbors. Bonnie Rumsfield (Wendy Schaal) assists in unraveling the mystery of the Klopeks and avoids tan lines. RTS might begin occasionally chanting. Who's going to kill who? Who is good? Who is our pal? La-Mar and Collin play with some wallpaper and try some lovely sardines. Later, we will all be at Ricky Butler's (Corey Feldman) awesome party. Pizza is coming! We hope you don't reach a 9 on the tension scale. Stick with us, Pinocchio! Be warned: these suburbanites are not taking any guff!

    Cloak & Dagger

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 14, 2024 96:13


    Happy Father's Day! We hope your weekend includes tasty food, sleuthing and loading up your classified cartridges (tapes). Young Davey Osborne (Henry Thomas) has a wild imagination, and he has an imaginary friend, Jack Flack (Dabney Coleman), who is also the image of his father, Hal (also Dabney). While playing a spy game around town, Davey witnesses a murder and is handed a top-secret cartridge. He and his friend Kim (Christina Nigra) then get caught up in a bonkers situation that only their spy games have prepared them for. Maybe! Their computer friend Morris (William Forsythe) confirms their video game contains government secrets. Now, a bunch of over-eager, wall-breaking goons are after them! Luckily, sweet Eunice (Jeanette Nolan) and George (John McIntire) are able to assist Davey in his mission. Something might not be right though. Trust your instincts! RTS sneaks within the shadows and perfects the “Crossfire Gambit.” La-Mar, Collin and Jeremy learn when to roll the dice and when to get off the boat. There will be a lot of running. Cloaking? Yes! Daggering? You bet! You'll also discover who the needed father is. We miss you Dabney! We look forward to watching many more of your films. 

    Hot Rod

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 7, 2024 80:22


    Summon your spirit animals and let's go stunting! Rod Kimble (Andy Samberg) wants to follow in his father's stuntman footsteps. He has assembled an entire crew! His half-brother Kevin (Jorma Taccone) is the team manager and works on filming. Dave (Bill Hader) is the mechanic when he's not working at the skating rink. Rico (Danny McBride) builds the ramps and has access to looted goods. And, Denise (Isla Fisher) has recently joined and is there for Taichi training and crushing on. Rod's stepfather, Frank (Ian McShane) needs a heart transplant but doesn't have the funds. Only Barry Pasternack (Chris Parnell) and the power of AM radio can help Rod raise the needed money! RTS have been drinking green tea all GD day! La-Mar and Collin make sure to keep their mustaches fresh and to carefully eat all their pies. You'll be surprised by the cooked goose and the taco vs. grilled cheese fight. Train hard! Believe in yourself! “Stay sweet.”

    Can't Hardly Wait

    Play Episode Listen Later May 31, 2024 85:20


    Congratulations to all of the graduates out there! It's time for one last bash before the summer kicks off. Preston Meyers (Ethan Embry) has gone near obsessive-gaga over Amanda Beckett (Jennifer Love Hewitt) since freshman year. Now that Mike Dexter (Peter Facinelli) has broken up with her, maybe he can express his feelings to her. It all starts with a frosted strawberry Pop Tart. It's kismet! Meanwhile, William Lichter (Charlie Korsmo) plots his revenge on Mike for the years of tournament. He'll try to navigate through “Paradise City.” Also, Denise (Lauren Ambrose) is locked in a bathroom with Kenny (Seth Green) and his backpack of sexiness. RTS attend this soiree with high hopes and Barry Manilow in their hearts. Collin makes it clear that you can buy his flavor, but you can't waste his flavor. Is everything just fated to happen? Can a letter change it all? When is the band going to start? Jerry O'Connell! What?!

    The Golden Child

    Play Episode Listen Later May 24, 2024 70:31


    A private investigator, Chandler Jarrell (Eddie Murphy), who specializes in finding missing children is requested and destined to find the whereabouts of the kidnapped Golden Child (J.L. Reate). He's been chosen! The frownie-faced, no no-nonsense villain Sardo Numspa (Charles Dance) and his monster henchman (who are the worst at their jobs) will try to bumble their way in completing their evil plans which is to make the world a hell. Kee (Charlotte Lewis) helps persuade Jarrell to visit Tibet, fight a bone demon and save the world. And when she's not doing that, she's flipping and kicking – some of that is into his heart. All of this is under the watchful eye of The Old Goupa (Victor Wong) and assisted by Doctor Hong (James Hong). RTS drinks some filthy water to obtain the Ajanti dagger. Totally worth it! Jeremy and La-Mar avoid eating the blood oatmeal and try out some monastery leaves. Be careful in your dreams, stay true to yourself and we all need to check in on “dear, sweet brother Numsy.”

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