Tend and Befriend

"Let us know what you think about this episode"A powerful home birth story highlighting the incredible strength of women and the sacred honor of supporting birthing families. Doula Debra shares her evolving approach to home birth support and the beautiful outcome of a recent birth where connection, trust and protecting oxytocin flow created magic.• Creating deeper connections with birthing families before labor begins• Understanding the importance of protecting oxytocin flow during labor• Preparing spiritually and emotionally as a birth worker• Recognizing transition signs even when contraction patterns aren't textbook• Witnessing the power of women birthing on their own terms• Sharing positive birth stories to help women trust their bodies again• Standing as a support without taking up space in the birthing roomIf you find the right doula, she'll help you find your strength, your voice, and your peace in your birth journey.

"Let us know what you think about this episode"There's a life-changing moment when a woman transforms into a mother – regardless of whether she always knew motherhood was her path. This raw, honest conversation with art therapist Ainsley Winter reveals her journey from uncertainty about motherhood to an empowered hospital birth experience.Ainsley's story dismantles the false dichotomy between medicated and unmedicated births. Using the powerful "mountain versus gondola" analogy, she explains how she navigated her options and ultimately chose what felt right for her body – a hospital birth with epidural support. Yet her preparation was anything but passive. From childbirth education classes to doula support, breastfeeding preparation with her partner, and deep connection to the book "Birthing From Within," Ainsley created a foundation of knowledge that allowed her to maintain autonomy throughout her hospital experience.What makes this episode particularly valuable is Ainsley's candid discussion of both the physical and mental aspects of birth. She describes the moment when her epidural began wearing off during transition, and how rhythmic breathing techniques grounded her through intense sensations. Her pushing experience – just 40 minutes ending with one powerful "monster roar" push – demonstrates how effective guidance and body awareness can create efficiency even with pain management.The conversation extends beautifully into postpartum reflections, where Ainsley shares her surprise at how unprepared she felt for recovery despite extensive birth preparation. Her analogy of "training for a marathon and then getting hit by a bus" perfectly captures what many new mothers experience. She offers practical insights about creating protective space in those early days and honoring the profound bodily changes that continue long after birth.Perhaps most compelling is how Ainsley connects her birth experience to her work as an art therapist, revealing how both journeys involve accessing wisdom beyond words. Her newfound "mother bear" energy now fuels her commitment to creating healing spaces where people can express complex emotions through creative processes.Whether you're pregnant, supporting someone who is, or simply curious about authentic birth experiences, this conversation offers wisdom, warmth, and a refreshing perspective on how preparation and autonomy create empowerment, regardless of birth preferences. Listen, share, and join our community of women supporting women through life's most transformative experiences.

"Let us know what you think about this episode"We explore epidurals in childbirth, examining what they are, their risks, and why unmedicated birth options deserve equal consideration in your birth plan.• Epidurals are regional anesthesia using local anesthetics and opioids to block pain signals from the waist down• Research shows epidurals can slow labor progression, especially during the pushing phase by up to 90 minutes• Associated with higher likelihood of requiring vacuum extraction or forceps during delivery• Can contribute to a cascade of interventions including Pitocin, continuous monitoring, and potentially C-section• Side effects include maternal hypotension in 14-33% of cases, which can reduce blood flow to the placenta• Rare complications include post-dural puncture headaches and nerve damage• Can cause maternal fever (15% higher risk), potentially leading to unnecessary antibiotic treatment for baby• May affect baby's alertness and rooting reflexes, creating challenges with early breastfeeding• Despite risks, epidurals have benefits including pain relief, stress reduction, and making complicated labors manageable• Create a "moment of crisis plan" to determine your first step when you need help during laborIf you found this episode helpful, please share it with a friend, leave a review, or subscribe for more evidence-based discussions on pregnancy and birth. Thank you for your support.Links to research: Epidurals effect on second stage of labor -https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/24499753/Epidurals effects on vacuum or forceps use in birth -https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC6494646/Reducted risk of cesarean delivery with discontinuation of pitocin in active labor   - https://www.ajog.org/article/S0002-9378(25)00161-9/fulltextEpidurals and maternal fever -  https://www.ajog.org/article/S0002-9378(22)00480-X/fulltextEpidurals and early breastfeeding difficulty -  https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/books/NBK501222/

"Let us know what you think about this episode"Postpartum bleeding, or lochia, is your body's natural healing process as your uterus returns to its pre-pregnancy size. We explore the science behind this important recovery phase and what every new mother should know about supporting her body during this time.• Uterus shrinks from watermelon to pear size in about six weeks after delivery• Lochia progresses through three distinct phases: rubra (days 1-4), serosa (days 5-10), and alba (final phase)• Bleeding occurs as the wound where the placenta attached heals• Breastfeeding releases oxytocin that stimulates uterine contractions and speeds healing• Cesarean deliveries may experience lighter bleeding as some uterine lining is removed during surgery• Warning signs include bright red bleeding that returns after lightening, large clots, foul smell, or soaking pads hourly• Postpartum hemorrhage affects 1-5% of births in Canada and requires immediate medical attention• Rest, hydration, nutrition, and self-compassion are essential for supporting recoveryTake time to heal and remember that every body is different. If you have concerns about your postpartum bleeding, always reach out to your healthcare provider.

"Let us know what you think about this episode"Episode Title: How to Boost Milk Supply NaturallyWelcome back to Tend and Befriend! I'm your host Deborah—mom, doula, health professional, and your biggest cheerleader on this journey through pregnancy, postpartum, and parenthood.In today's episode, we're talking about a topic I hear all the time from breastfeeding moms: how to naturally boost your milk supply. Whether you're just starting out or navigating a supply dip, I'll walk you through research-backed strategies, supportive tools, and tips that really work. We'll talk about supply and demand, power pumping, hydration, helpful herbs, and simple ways to make your nursing life a little easier.You'll also hear my thoughts on how local breastfeeding support systems can impact feeding outcomes—and why preparation during pregnancy is so important.✨ Plus, I'm sharing a few of my favorite mama-approved products (available in Canada) and some heartfelt encouragement, because you deserve it.

"Let us know what you think about this episode"Let's talk about the one childbirth fear that keeps many expectant mothers up at night – pooping during labor. As a doula, massage therapist, and mother of two, I've witnessed firsthand how this perfectly natural bodily function creates unnecessary anxiety for birthing people everywhere.The science is straightforward: when you're pushing your baby out, you're using the exact same muscle groups involved in bowel movements. Your baby's head applies pressure to your rectum as it descends, potentially causing any remaining stool to be expelled. Far from being embarrassing, this is actually evidence that you're pushing effectively! The statistics? It happens to roughly one in three women, but here's the surprising part – most never even know it occurred because birth teams handle it with such practiced discretion.What strikes me most from supporting countless births is how quickly these worries evaporate in the delivery room. The moment active labor begins, concerns about bodily functions fade against the backdrop of the extraordinary work your body is performing. And once that baby is placed in your arms? Trust me, you won't remember or care about anything else that happened in that room.Birth is inherently messy, unpredictable, and beautiful. Your healthcare providers have truly seen it all – amniotic fluid, blood, vernix, and yes, sometimes poop. None of it phases them. They're focused on safely bringing your baby earthside, not judging natural bodily functions. So take a deep breath and release this particular worry. Your body knows exactly what it's doing, even when it's doing things society has taught us to find embarrassing.Share this episode with an expectant friend who might need to hear this message. Remember, the path to motherhood asks us to surrender certain social constructs around control and modesty – and in that surrender, we discover our remarkable strength.

"Let us know what you think about this episode"We dive deep into the evidence behind aspirin use during pregnancy, examining why fertility clinics recommend it and how to weigh the risks and benefits of this common intervention. The podcast explores low-dose aspirin's role in improving blood flow to the placenta, potentially preventing complications for mothers with specific risk factors.• Low-dose aspirin (81mg) works by preventing tiny blood clots and reducing inflammation• Studies show aspirin may reduce preeclampsia risk by 24% in high-risk pregnancies when started before 16 weeks• Particularly beneficial for women with recurrent pregnancy loss, preeclampsia risk, or undergoing fertility treatments• Potential risks include increased bleeding during delivery, rare placenta abruption, and stomach irritation• Decision to use aspirin must be individualized and made with healthcare provider guidance• Important to question routine interventions and understand the specific reasoning behind recommendationsRemember, the best decisions are made with knowledge, care, and your unique circumstances in mind. If you found this episode helpful, please share it with a friend, leave a review, or subscribe for more evidence-based conversations about pregnancy and motherhood.Shownotes:Links to Studies:The Lancet - https://www.thelancet.com/journals/lanhae/article/PIIS2352-3026(24)00341-7/abstract?utmFertility & Sterility - https://www.fertstert.org/article/S0015-0282%2805%2900221-9/fulltext?utm

We dive deep into common breastfeeding misconceptions that leave mothers feeling confused and inadequate, providing evidence-based facts to empower new parents on their feeding journey. The episode tackles seven persistent myths about breastfeeding and offers practical guidance for navigating challenges with confidence.• Breastfeeding is a learned skill, not an instinct – 92% of moms face challenges in the first week• Breast size has absolutely no impact on milk production capacity• Frequent feeding and cluster feeding are normal behaviors, not signs of insufficient milk supply• C-section births present unique challenges but don't prevent successful breastfeeding• While breast milk contains unique components, formula is a safe, healthy option for babies who need it• Working mothers can continue breastfeeding through pumping, partial nursing, or adjusted feeding schedules• Initial discomfort is common when breastfeeding begins, but persistent pain requires professional evaluationIf you found this episode helpful, please share it with a friend or leave a review, and keep nurturing your beautiful journey of motherhood.

Ever wondered if "pregnancy brain" is real science or just a convenient excuse for misplaced keys and forgotten appointments? The fascinating truth lies somewhere in between, and it's more remarkable than you might think.Pregnancy triggers measurable changes in your brain's structure, particularly in areas related to social cognition and emotional regulation. Far from being a deficit, these changes represent your brain's brilliant adaptation to prepare you for motherhood. Think of it as nature's way of helping you prioritize what really matters—your growing baby—while temporarily filing away less critical information.That feeling of mental fogginess has solid biological foundations. The hormonal tsunami of pregnancy, particularly those skyrocketing levels of progesterone and estrogen, directly influences memory and executive functioning. Combined with pregnancy-related sleep disruptions (midnight bathroom trips, anyone?), your brain faces genuine challenges. Yet these temporary cognitive shifts serve a greater purpose—they're rewiring your neural pathways to strengthen the connection with your baby.For those struggling with pregnancy brain, simple strategies can help manage the foggy moments. Writing things down (creating "outie lists" instead of keeping everything in your head), prioritizing rest, staying hydrated, and consuming brain-nourishing foods like omega-3s can all support cognitive function during this transformative time. Most importantly, embrace self-compassion and perhaps a sense of humor about those moments when you find yourself searching for sunglasses that are already on your head.The next time pregnancy brain makes you feel scattered, remember it's not a flaw—it's a feature of your amazingly adaptive brain preparing for life's most important job. Subscribe for more insights on maternal health, and share your own pregnancy brain stories with us—we'd love to hear them!

Today, we're tackling a big topic: Why do medical professionals often refer to Pitocin as oxytocin? What are the risks and benefits? And why is Pitocin being overused in so many hospital births? Let's break it all down.

Step into the world of childbirth realities with Tend and Befriend as we unpack the truthful nuances surrounding the event of water breaking. Many of us can recall memorable moments from beloved television shows where a woman's water dramatically breaks in a public setting, igniting chaos and urgency. However, this depiction is often far from the truth. In our latest episode, we strip away the theatrics to reveal what actually happens when one's water breaks, arming expecting parents with the knowledge they need to feel prepared and informed.Join us as we discuss how only a minority of pregnant individuals experience water breaking as the first sign of labor, the signs to recognize when it genuinely occurs, and the steps to take following membrane rupture. We provide clarity on how fluid flow may differ from the cinematic version and why identifying amniotic fluid accurately is crucial. This episode also explores significant health considerations that warrant immediate medical attention, including meconium presence and umbilical cord prolapse situations.Our aim is to demystify childbirth's complexities while providing practical advice to transition from the dramatization to every mother's reality. With expert insights and straightforward guidance, we help listeners navigate this essential part of the birthing process. Don't miss out on this vital information—tune in, prepare, and join the conversation today!

Join us in this special episode as I walk you through Jacobsons Relaxation.  This technique can help anyone manage stress, and alleviate discomfort, especially mothers in the delivery room.  1:49 - Introduction & Disclaimer 4:07 - Jacobsons Relaxation 23:52 - ClosingBlog Labor & Birth CourseWebsite | Instagram

Today we are answering questions that you asked us through our social media accounts!!Join me today as we discuss a couple of these topics: Red Raspberry Leaf Tea, Options for flipping a breech baby, When to start tracking fetal Kick, Massage do's & donts.  What is a mucus plug and what should I watch for?Two very painful symptoms in pregnancy that has to do with connective tissue and how to care for it.I love answering all of your questions and its nice to do them all at one time., keep them coming!

I peed on the stick and Its positive,  I am pregnant!  What are my first steps to take?  How does this all work?Do I call the OB?Do I call the Family Doctor?Do I scream it from the mountain tops?I am not sure I am ready for this..I dont know what my options are..There are so many feelings and emotions attached to finding out you are pregnant and just because the test is positive does not mean you have to feel positive. This episode covers the above topics as well as all of the information you need in the first weeks of pregnancy!  

Ever wonder how some women manage not to worry about finances during their maternity leave?  I know how they did it.... they hired Alynn Godfroy from Godfroy financial.   How did she enjoy her maternity leave without financial burden, the same way she is now enjoying her life, raising her baby boy Austin and making time for herself, her husband and her family life while owning her own business!  She did it with smart financial strategy!  I have admired Alynn's financial mindset since the day I was first introduced to her, and you will too.  She is  a smart, kind, loving individual & a mom of baby boy Austin and she enjoys helping others achieve their financial goals.  Alynn offers classes about finances, and hosts a podcast with a sweet name "achieve fire" with Fire being the acronym for  Financial independence retire early.  Cool ?  Yes it is!! Join us to hear a little about Alynns journey to getting pregnant, & a pretty simple  way to figure out your budget for maternity leave! .Alynn Godfroy is a graduate of the University of Windsor where shecompleted her Honours Bachelor of Commerce degree. She ownsGodfroy Financial Management Ltd., and has been a Financial Plannerfor 18 years, holding designations as a Certified Executive Advisor,Certified Life Underwriter, Elder Planning Counsellor and MasterFinancial Planner.She is happily married with a 3-year-old toddler, 4 stepchildren and theauthor of “Why You Need a Financial Advisor.”Alynn was a Rotarian for 11 years and served as the President of theRotary Club of Belle River and is currently the Charter President of thearea's newest club, the Rotary Club of Windsor-Walkerville. She hasparticipated in volunteer missions to Venezuela where doctors andnurses performed cleft lip and cleft palate surgeries. Alynn has alsobeen to Ghana three times helping to renovate two schools and ahealth clinic.Alynn just completed 7 years as a board member of Community LivingWindsor where she was the Treasurer of their board.You can find out more about Alynn on her website www.godfroyfinancialgroup.com 

Friends sometimes divulge things to each other what we wouldnt dare admit to anyone else!  Jaclyn and I have been friends for alot of years, we laugh about each others faults and the stupid things that run through our minds as women, wives & especially as Mothers! NOTE - We are friends and this conversation is not how we feel as professionals, we have to laugh at each other with friends, in order to survive motherhood. Jaclyn is one of the owners of Odyssey Wellness in Tecumseh.  She has an undergraduate in Psychology & a Masters in Social Work, with a certification in Perinatal Mood and Anxiety Disorders.   After having children of her own, Jaclyn developed a passion for providing support for birth parents and partners .   She is a firm believer that it takes a village to raise a child,  although so many of us struggle with trying to do it alone.  Listen to us chat about how we have grown as mothers! You can find out more about Jaclyn @ www.odysseywellness.ca

Ever get all the balls in your life rolling smoothly, only to have them all go crashing to the ground?  Yeah me too!Here's what the %#@*  happened to all of the balls I was juggling last year!! Please join us today as I have a very vulnerable conversation with one of my closest friends about life, injury, mental illness & loss. While this story is about failure, at no point was I not okay with failing… in order to grow you sometimes have to fail, and fail miserably!   Alana -  is the daughter of one of my closest friends, she and her sister are like daughters to me and my love for them grows stronger every year.  I love that despite a major age difference Alana and I can share struggles about life, love,  health and we are just as comfortable crying together as we are laughing together.  Alana will be joining me once in a while as a guest host!  Thank you for listening! Love beams to you!! 

Ever wondered what the process is like to discharge your OBGYN?  Listen to Casey tell her story of having difficulty with the rules at her OBGYN's office during the pandemic and what steps she took to get the birth she wanted.   Casey is a fireball about her views on the pandemic and the guidelines involved at our local hospital during birth.. she feels like everyone should be treated as the individual humans that we are.  Casey talks us through her struggles with fertility, a miscarrige, getting pregnant again and finding out she is capable of a VBAC.  She shares the story of firing her OB, hiring a midwife and obtaining a medical mask exemption, all while we listen to her little Adeline gurgle in the background.   Join us as we laugh and talk about her beautiful Journey! 

Can you imagine travelling all over the world teaching and mastering your craft?  Thats exactly what Renee Meloche from Jelly Fish Pilates in Tecumseh Ontario did before deciding to settle down here in Windsor, Essex County and open her own studio.  Renee started her journey with Pilates in 1997 and has a full certification with STOTT Pilates, and has travelled all over the world teaching certifications. Renee is a business owner, the mom of three kids, an author and a brillant pilates instructor. I am very excited to talk with her today about all of those things and her special interest in pre & Post natal Pilates.  Renee has a team of amazing Pilates Instructors on staff at her wonderful studio to help you move forward in your health or to start you on the path to health and wellbeing.  You can learn more about Renee through her very own Podcast - Pilates Mom.

Becoming a single mother by choice is an increasingly  popular path to motherhood.  As more women are making the decision to have a child on their own, whether through artificial insemination, in-vitro fertilization,  adoption or other means, we are asking more and more questions.   What happens when you make the decision to do this alone?  How do you choose a donor in Canada?  What is the process?  What does the fertility clinics charge?  Will I need hormones?  How much does the donor cost?  and much much more... Listen to me talk with Tiffany about all of these things for her during the journey  of bringing her baby girl Jordan Earthside.  

We can all use help with finding the right way to speak to our medical professionals of choice. Todays episode I make 5 suggestions that have helped me and others be a better case manager of their health.  Hope you find them helpful and can put them into play for you and your health! Good Luck!! 

For some people, motherhood comes naturally, it's almost like they were born to be moms.  This is the case with today's guest Leigha Moravac.  Leigha has always known she wanted to be a mom and it's easy to watch her with her children and see that being a mom is a natural instinct for her.  Despite all of this - Parenting isn't always a clear and easy path, especially when health issues, car accidents, and a newborn who doesn't sleep well are playing a role.  Throw into all of this that we are in the middle of a world-wide pandemic and you will have a recipe for a few periods of crisis.  Finding the support you need from friends, family and the professionals in your community is always the right step, but can sometimes end differently than you planned.  We all need to be validated and supported through the first few years of having babies, so that we can find the trust in ourselves.  Join me today in talking with a beautiful mom, who shows us her path through challenging pregnancies and being on maternity leave during a pandemic.  Leigha tells us her journey of how she has prevailed during this unprecedented time, all while loving her two beautiful children, her husband and most of all herself! 

This episode I speak with one of our local hospitals Radiographic Imaging Experts Milena Lewis .  Milena has been in this field for over 20 years and is highly skilled when advising patients on the risks and benefits and how to ask for advice when X-rays have been requested by your Health professional.  Milena helps shine some light on what you can do to be more informed when you need an X-Ray Image both during pregnancy and everyday.  Ionizing radiation (x-ray) is composed of high-energy photons that are capable of damaging DNA and generating caustic free radicals, although we discuss this briefly in this episode we do not discuss the exact photon exposure involved with various Imaging methods.  If you would like to know the range of doses provided by common radiographs you can find them Here and also lots of other facts on exposure. 

Melissa Bishop Nriagu is a Canadian Professional Athlete from Eaganville Ontario,  she is a  2 time Olympic Athlete for the 800 metre distance.  She is only the 3rd woman to achieve a time under 2:00 minutes and is currently the record holder for this distance at an amazing time of 1:57.01.  Melissa is here to talk about Training and Exercise during pregnancy, as well as Postpartum.  We discuss the fact that no matter what other women have experienced or professionals say is typical, this may not be the journey for you.  Pregnant women often hear mixed information about what physical activity is safe or dangerous during pregnancy and when you SHOULD feel like exercising postpartum.   Melissa share's with us that no matter how much you know and plan for - Your body sometimes doesn't respond the way you think it will.   We share Melissa's journey of training during pregnancy and her path of finding the right professionals to guide her while keeping her baby girl Corinne safe.  We talk about returning to postpartum training and how that looked for her.  How would training during Covid look and attempting to qualify when there are no races and a very touchy topic of the lack of Maternity leave for Canadian Professional Athletes. You can find out more about Melissa Bishop Nriagu at this link and don't forget to follow her journey in this years Olympics in Tokyo.  GO CANADA!https://olympic.ca/team-canada/melissa-bishop/

Most women are struggling with hormone issues in one way or another. Every woman is different and has a different story.  It is important to understand your overall health and why your hormones may be disrupted. Dr. Kristen Kupeyan at B Medical in Windsor Ontario, is certified in bioidentical hormone replacement therapy and is highly sought after for her care with womens and mens hormone balance both in Canada and the United States.  Listen to us discuss some of the issues that might be indicating to you that there is an imbalance or disruption in your hormones and what is possible for you under her care. She will be talking about Estrogen, Progesterone, Testosterone and thyroid. What can happen if your disrupted hormones are left untreated and why getting a baseline of your hormones when you are feeling super can be highly beneficial.   You can find out more about Dr. Kristen Kupeyan through her website at www.bmedicalcenter.com 

Giving birth carries a lot of emotions for families, and moms sometimes have difficulty processing all of these feelings and emotions if they feel they didn't have a birth with choices.  Today we are talking to Nour Hachem Fawaz as she dives into her first birth that ended with a cesarean delivery and the feelings she had postnatal that she felt were connected to her feelings about her body and birthing team.  We discuss how different that looked with her second birth, where she felt supported and empowered to birth with choices and in control.  Even while birthing during a pandemic, developing cholestasis during pregnancy, building a team that supports your wishes, she felt like she was in control.  Nour expresses that when you get what you need during the birth process how it can change your physiological thoughts towards your mothering journey. Nour and the host share an intimate conversation about her journey through motherhood, Postpartum depression and the struggle that comes with all of it.  Note: There is a lot of crying and laughing during this episode but in no way shape of form are we laughing at the seriousness of these very intimate topics. You can find access to the beautiful Nour and her leadership role with being an advocate for women in skilled trades through her website  www.webuildadream.com . Nour also has her own podcast and you can find it under the name Perfectly Unfiltered. 

Deborah is a RMT in the province of Ontario and the CEO and founder of Pelvic Love Massage Therapy.  Deborah has owned her own business for 16 years.  The purpose of her podcast is try to bring awareness to the standard of care for women by sharing beautiful and traumatic stories of pregnancy, birth and health related issues.  We will be sharing stories by women willing to share their stores and talking with health professionals and service providers willing to work as a team to help women on their health journey.   Women struggle to find the help and care they need,  especially during times of difficulty in their lives like childbirth, postpartum, menopause and of course during a pandemic.  Listen to this interview of why we wanted a podcast as a platform for all women! Find out more about Deborah at www.pelviclove.com