The FuMP

All I have are gargoyle friends.

Hey meatbags! Another 365 days have gone by. Do you know how long that is in machine-cycles? No? Figures. Well, let me state it in terms that you will understand with your measly meat-minds. lead vocals: drumbot backing vocals: OTTO-TUNE drums: TR-808 synth solo: ID10T arpeggiations: Proctor Silex Recorded automatically at the burned out shell of C.O.G. Secret Lab, Harahan, LA, Nuclear Summer 08x42

This is a tragicomic country number about breaking a bong, and throwing it away. Apply all the hidden messages you'd like. (C)2025 Box Office Poison Records Written, performed, produced, mixed by BFC Donkey Hotay Music (BMI) Mastered by Michael Fossenkemper - TurtleTone Studio NYC Art by Rochelle Carr Studios

Dating your ex's sister.

This is my own take on Johnny Cash's "Man in Black." A bit of context here....In previous incarnations, performing as Powered BY Satan and later as Flibbertigibbet, I let it all hang out in a low budget devil suit, often in redface, with horns and basketball sock codpiece. I was, and forever will be the Man in Red. So what goes through a middle aged scientist's mind as he finds himself once again standing in an inch of ick in a toilet stall of a low end venue struggling to squeeze his middle aged ass into unwashed red leotards for zero pay and mimimal groupies. THis song explains it.

Carrie Dahlby texted me and said "I HAVE AN IDEA FOR A SONG FOR YOU!" And two days later, here it is. Cause it's like timely and stuff. And hey, there's a video below! Music: Kendrick Lamar Words, accordion, bass, percussion, vocals, arrangement, production: SG Tuba: Timothy J. Weber Very clever and timely idea: Carrie Dahlby

Song that seems trashy on the exterior but is all lovey dovey deep down. Additional musician- James Cudworth, bass and lead guitar

A tribute to Dr. Demento, recorded for his 84th birthday and recorded at his birthday party! A duet, written and performed by Carla Ulbrich and Bill Larkin Recorded live by Luke Ski Remixed by Carla Ulbrich Lyric content suggestions: Jeff Morris

Prez Like Me (parody of "Friend Like Me" from Aladdin) On one thing we can all agree... You Ain't Never Had A Prez Like Me! Lyrics and Singing: Joe J Thomas Copyright 2025, Joe J Thomas, Joe's Dump, Joe's Dump (JoesDump.com) All Rights Reserved. Not A Quinn-Martin Production.

Monty Python fans rejoice! I've stolen another one of their songs! But I did it for a good reason -- Barret Hansen's birthday! That's right, our pal Doctor Demento had another birthday in April (they always seem to happen in April), and I wanted to make a silly gift for him. So I did! And you can find it on my new CD, "The Artist Eventually Known As Somebody You've Heard Of" at www.stevegoodie.com! Music: John Cleese and Eric Idle Lyrics: SG and Niamh Bagnell Piano, keyboards, guitars, bass, percussion, whistling, sound effect, vocals, arrangement, production: SG Horn: Blueberry Voice over: Barret Hansen

Now, I'm not known for doing political songs but when Lauren Loomer called the new pope, Pope Leo XVI, a "WOKE MARXIST POPE", and then several people online (most notably Schmoyoho on Twitter and LouisaTheLast on BlueSky) said you could sing that phrase to the tune of "Pink Pony Club" by Chappell Roan, I knew what had to be done. Originally released as a shorter version on my TikTok, YouTube, and Instagram channels (as well as my Patreon), after popular demand I now present you all with the full version. Enjoy.

Since I'm quite certain the Venn Diagram of people who watch White Lotus and the people who pay attention to the FuMP is basically a circle, I'm pleased to present a White Lotus fan song. IYKYK. Parody of "Escape (the Pi?a Colada Song)" by Rupert Holmes. Lyrics and vocals by Carrie Dahlby. Mixing and mastering by Jace McLain.

A song for my favorite character from the Dungeon Crawler Carl series by Matt Dinniman. It was written and recorded after reading Eye of the Bedlam Bride, but before This Inevitable Ruin (if that's something you needed to know.)

~~~ TL;DR: It's an updated remake of a Beastie Boys parody about Dr. Demento and Whimsical Will. ~~~ One of the most iconic 'Side 1, Track 1' songs in the history of Generation X is the first song on the legendary 1986 Diamond Certified debut album by the Beastie Boys "Licensed To Ill", titled "Rhymin' And Stealin'". ... Far less iconic is the great Luke Ski's 1997 Certified Plastic sophomore album "Shadows Of The Bunghole". For that album, I had the oh-so-clever idea to begin the album with a parody of "Rhymin' And Stealin'", with the gag being that if someone put the disc in and started playing it, another person nearby hearing the album start would be fooled into thinking the album playing was "Licensed To Ill", and then when the first sound bites and lyrics dropped, they would be overcome with a feeling of jocular bamboozlement. Whether or not that ever occurred in real life is unknown and assumed not ever have actually happened. After nearly 2 years of finally being able to listen to "The Dr. Demento Show" on the actual radio, I felt the need to pay tribute to the show, to Dr. Demento (a.k.a. Barret Hansen) himself, as well as the weekly purveyor of the "Demented News" on the show, "Whimsical Will" Simpson. So that led me to make a parody of the aforementioned Beastie's song, titling mine "The Doctor And William". I call this type of song a 'forced parody', in which there is no clever wordplay or other logical or parallel connection between the original song and subject matter being discussed in the parody, making it obvious that the author (in this case, me) just REALLY REALLY REALLY wanted to parody THAT SONG about THAT SUBJECT despite the fact that it doesn't make any sense to do so intellectually. So, having copped to that, I still really liked what I did with it, with my other MCs making up my Beastie parody trio being J. Styles (Jason Stahl, best friend since the 4th grade) and DJ Skrabble (my brother J.T. Sienkowski). The good Doctor never played this track on his show, but Whimsical Will did report on the song during the July 6th, 1997 edition of the Demented News. 27 years later, an impending celebration of Dr. Demento's birthday made me think it would be fun to give this track an update and perform it live at the celebration with the help of some friends. So I commissioned Professor Shyguy to make a new backing track (and also mix this final studio version), so that I, the great Luke Ski (doing the King Ad-Rock parts), along with Devo Spice (MCA) and Tony Goldmark (Mike D.), and also along with the chanting assistance of Chris Mezzolesta of Power Salad, Insane Ian, and ShoEboX of Worm Quartet, performed it for Dr. D. to the jocular bamboozlement of everyone in attendance. In conclusion, for the millionth time, thank you to Barret Hansen, a.k.a. Dr. Demento, and "Whimsical Will" Simpson, for bringing so much joy, laughter, and found family together with your decades upon decades of demented news, mad music, and crazy comedy. We owe it all to you. And we will never ever forget to stay deee-mented! Will the good Doctor play "The Doctor And William (2025 Edition)" on his show? Perhaps he might if the fans REQUEST for him to play it, either from "The Dr. Demento Show" Request Page, or post it with the word REQUEST at The OFFICIAL Dr. Demento Show Facebook Page!

An important warning regarding the dangers of prickly succulunts.

You better go to sleep!

Pandas. You know they're not from here, right? Damn Alien Pandas... Panda Parody Song (parody of "Brandy" by Looking Glass 1972) Lyrics and Singing by Joe J Thomas of JoesDump.com Copyright 2025, Joe J Thomas, Joe's Dump, JoesDump.com All Rights Reserved. Not a Quinn-Martin Production.

From my newest CD "The Artist Eventually Known As Somebody You've Heard Of," here's the parody of "Life Is A Highway" that didn't know you were waiting for! Go get the CD at www.stevegoodie.com ! Music: Tom Cochrane Lyrics: SG, Kendra Shepherd, Niamh Bagnell Guitars, drums, bass, keyboards, percussion, vocals: SG Backing vocals: Deb Guy

Turns out when you pick cabinet members because of their toadying and TV appearances, they have no idea what they're doing!

From the upcoming album "Mimic." The Muppet Hunter was originally inspired by my first convention cosplay with my youngest (we were muppet hunters) and the thought that the Dragon Con Filk Music Track group sing would be Muppet-themed in 2023. It wasn't. That year turned out to be super-hero themed. It took a year for me to be able to sing it at Dragon Con at the group sing. And now it's going on an album.

In a time wrought with generative AI, what's the most human thing I could do as a musical artist? The answer, of course, is embarrass myself by rewriting a beloved jazz standard and recording a performance of it, mistakes and all. The brand new OK Glass album "Same", which features Logan Award winning song "Millennials Are Killing", is out now! Available for free at ok.glass and Bandcamp.

When a whole town is under siege by the French's army, sometimes your greatest shield is the one you were born with. This is when it's perfectly honorable to turn your back on danger! No sailor left be-Heinz! Bad Beth and Beyond: lead and harmony vocals, bouzouki, bass guitar, gang vocals Lewis D'Aubin: drums, gang vocals Josh Paxton: melodica, gang vocals Doc Booger: flute, gang vocals Prudence O'Malley: gang vocals Recorded, mixed, and mastered at the COG Secret Lab by Lewis D'Aubin, Harahan, LA

You really don't! New from the creator of FUMP faves FLUFFY'S MASTER PLAN FOR WORLD DOMINATION, DONEKIRK and HOW DID THIS THING GET IN ME?! An inspirational anthem based on a true sports story from the 1970s. (O M G) #genx #tv From the album FINISH WHAT, available at https://amyengelhardt.bandcamp.com/album/finish-what (c) 2024 I ARE Music (ASCAP) Produced by Asmundur Johannsson and Amy Engelhardt Mixed by Vinny Wood at Studio Silo, Sto?varfjor?ur ICELAND Recorded at Studio Paradis, Gar?abaerand ICELAND and Studio Silo Asmundur Johannsson (drums/percussion), Johann Asmundsson (bass), Brynhildur Oddsdottir (guitars), Amy Engelhardt (keys/vox)

I love watching videos of llamas acting up and was spit on by one as a kid at the state fair. While I was on the ground, from being knocked down from being startled, I noticed signs. Way down low and up high, they warned "Watch Out Llama Spits." Completely not helpful placement, so I suspect livestock setup folks posted them as such to get their jollies watching fair patrons be spat upon. As I chose song titles for our debut album, I thought, "There's a song!" Swaddled in a sneaky jazz sound, this single weaves my story together with actual sounds of people interacting with naughty llamas. Of course, there's a dance mix as well that you can hear at our YouTube channel. Video: https://youtu.be/_Es47NDxa_8? Please Follow and Subscribe at YouTube and IG (@kurplunkmusic) for new funny videos! Most songs from the new album can be heard (and seen!) at our YouTube channel plus behind the scenes content: https://www.youtube.com/@Kurplunkmusic/videos

During FuMPFest 2024 members of The FuMP were invited to Escape from the Secret Lab by Dr. Milo T. Pinkerton of the Consortium of Genius. This was a command performance that Devo Spice, Luke Ski, Insane Ian, and Chris Mezzolesta took part in. If they did well they'd be spared. If not, they would be crushed under a 16 ton weight. One of the challenges was an Instant Song, where the performers were required to come up with a song "on the spot." So Chris provided a funky riff on the guitar while Devo, Ian, and Luke each did short verses about their experiences being kidnapped by the COG. This is a recording of that performance. We are proud to report that The FuMP was spared. This recorded is just one of many you can hear on the new FuMPFest 2024 - Live! 2-CD compilation! The album features two hours of music recorded at FuMPFest 2024 and features performances by Pastor Hastur, Holy Bongwater, 2d6, Ross Childs, Steve Goodie, Carla Ulbruch, and our guest of honor The Consortium of Genius! Plus bits from the Live Podcasts panel, the Dumb Parody Ideas contest, Movie Time, the QandA, and more! Pick up your copy now in the store.

Last week our pal Marlon showed up at my Weird Al Tribute show... and in his honor I wrote this very stupid parody of Exile's "Kiss You All Over." Marlon, as you may have guessed, is the keyboardist and a founding member of Exile. Marlon seemed to like the parody, and said he wanted a recording of it. So naturally I took it way too far, and here it is. Props to Uncle Walter for backup vocal, tambourine, and especially for his spirited yelling of "Khan!" Music: Mike Chapman and Nicky Chinn Lyrics, guitars, bass, drums, piano, keyboards, vocals, arrangement, production: SG Backing vocals: Ingrid Masterson and Walter Cherry Percussion: Walter Cherry

A song about a music fan with a lot of love to give but little luck when it comes to romance. Jimmy O'Donnell with: David Alan Shaw - guitar Michael Seifert - bass, drums, keyboards Additional recording and mixing by Michael Seifert at Suma Recording Mastered by Todd Tobias

Just a light-handed tune about Cancel Culture. Written and Performed: Dino-Mike Produced, Mixed and Mastered: Bob Emmet Music Video: Alisa Ogura-Traxler

Who says the end of the world can't be funny?

A dance song about shakin' something. Jace McLain: vocals, guitars, keys Kyle Thorne: vocals, synth bass Steve Goodie: drums

A song about the incredible Academy Award nominated horror movie "The Substance!" MAJOR SPOILER WARNING!!!! Parody of "Hot To Go" by Chappell Roan New lyrics by Jeff Whitmire Vocals by Jeff Whitmire and Aaron Becker Produced by Aaron Becker Music by Karaoke Version

Yep. Sorry. Music: David Gilmour and Roger Waters Words: SG and Niamh Bagnell Helpful suggestions: Susan Sulu Dubow Guitars, bass, drums, piano, vocals, all manner of stupid noises, arrangement, production: SG

This is one of the two songs (the other being "I Don't Remember Eatin' Corn) that inspired me to launch off into doing comedy music. I've loved this song since first hearing it as Steps covered it (this remix is the best version - https://youtu.be/V8Lyo5he0PA?). When I had the idea, I knew I had to flesh it out into an entire song. I love uplifting trance and thought that style would be perfect for this Laura Fabian parody. Couldn't get the vocalist here in Nashville that I really wanted and had a subscription to lalals.com so figured I'd just sing it and AI-convert my voice to Celine Dion--or in this case as close as it could get which worked. AI Whitney and Mariah round out the bgv's and overdubs. Please Follow and Subscribe at YouTube and IG (@kurplunkmusic) for new funny videos! Most songs from the new album can be heard (and seen!) at our YouTube channel plus behind the scenes content.

A few weeks ago Insane Ian came on The FuMPCast to plug the Logan Awards. He explained that when nominating songs you have to submit five entries, and if you don't have five entries just put a placeholder in for the others and he would figure it out. As a suggestion he said to write "Ian is made of beans." We then discussed which of us was going to write that song. I suspect many FuMPCast listeners will write their own song with this title. This is my entry. Lyrics, music, vocals: Devo Spice Brak impression: the great Luke Ski

The theme of rejection, this time by a roommate who does not understand respect. Lack of respect is a form of rejection. At the same time, it is about incompatibilities between people.

Here's a darkly comedic reminder that yes, these are scary times - but we've gotten through other periods of disruption (albeit painfully)

A song about the dangers of having fun

A song about the dangers of having fun

On the 2003 album of nerdcore pioneer mc chris titled "Knowing Is Half The Hassle", he did a track called "White Kids Love Hip-Hop" which featured his fellow [adult swim] voice acting star Andy Merrill doing the voice of his "Space Ghost Coast To Coast" and "Cartoon Planet" character Brak delivering a rant about how how he couldn't find anything fun to do in the town where he lives. Every year at the MarsCon Comedy Music Track there is a concert called the 'Smackdown' where all of the acts that performed that weekend come back on stage to close the weekend by taking turns doing cover versions of their favorite comedy songs. I, the great Luke Ski, have a long bucket list of comedy songs I love that I would love to perform a cover version of someday at the Smackdown concert. "White Kids Love Hip-Hop" has been on that list for years, with my assumption being that if I ever did it, the 'Brak' part would have been played by me doing my impersonation of Brak, as I had done for my 1998 tribute song "Baby Got Brak". In 2024, we were fortunate enough to book Andy Merrill as the Comedy Music Guest Of Honor at MarsCon. I was ecstatic. As I continued working on plans for the event, I eventually got around to looking at my bucket list of potential cover songs so I could pick one to cover at the Smackdown. When my eyes came upon the title "White Kids Love Hip-Hop", it hit me like a power band blast... I could cover "White Kids Love Hip-Hop" and ask Andy Merrill himself to reprise his role as Brak for the rant at the end of the song. I asked him if he'd be willing to, and he said yes. And the audio record of that actually happening in real life is what this FuMP track is. After we performed it, Andy took his turn at the Smackdown and performed a couple of "Weird Al" covers to finish off the weekend. I reached out to both mc chris and Andy Merrill to get their permission to post this live cover at the FuMP, and they both graciously said yes. So many thanks to both of them, you both have been inspirations to me, and have always been nice to me, which means a lot to this middle-aged fanboy. I admit, I do trip up a few of the lyrics in my performance, but I still think it went great, and it's one of my all-time favorite MarsCon memories that I wanted to share with everybody here at the FuMP. Music by Professor Shyguy Back-up White Kids: Lindsay Smith and Insane Ian This track is a part of the MarsCon 2025 Comedy Music Track Fund Raiser album, which is a nearly 4-hour-long MP3 album of live concert excerpts from MarsCon 2024, available to download for just $30 at the Shop page of MarsCon Comedy dot com. Besides the great Luke Ski and Andy Merrill, it also has performances by Insane Ian, Power Salad, Nuclear Bubble Wrap, Holy Bongwater, Jake Dewar, and many others. The funds raised go towards covering the hotel room costs for the performers of MarsCon 2025. Speaking of which, MarsCon 2025 is happening March 7th thru 9th in the Twin Cities, MN, and features our Comedy Music Guests Of Honor, John S. Hall and Dogbowl of King Missile (Dog Fly Religion), sponsored by Needlejuice Records. For the full list of performers and events visit MarsCon Comedy dot com, and for more details on the rest of MarsCon visit MarsCon dot com.

50 Ways To Love Your Lever (parody of Paul Simon's "50 Ways To Leave Your Lover") Valentine's day is on the way! Time for some self-love, euphemisms, and good ole spoonerisms! Lyrics and Vocals by Joe J Thomas of Joe's Dump (JoesDump.com) Copyright 2025, Joe's Dump (JoesDump.com) All Rights Reserved. Not A Quinn-Martin Production.

A jolly parody of the classic old song, in which I complain about artificial intelligence and the descent of America into fascism. Yay! Music: traditional Words: SG and Niamh Bagnell Guitar, bass, banjo, dobro, vocals, animal noises, arrangement, production: SG Helpful help: Sulu and John Trentes

Some people take their dates to the movies, some take their dates to a haunted pizzeria. This song tells the story of Bradley Lovestar showing his bravery (or foolishness) by taking his date to an abandonded pizzeria with some unexpected third, fourth, fifth, and sixth wheels. (And no, we're not sure where this fits in the lore)

Lake Titicaca is a real place and there really is a scrotum frog that lives there. Telmatobius culeus, commonly known as the Titicaca water frog is a medium-large to very large and endangered species of frog in the family Telmatobiidae with loose fitting wrinkley skin. A somewhat sloppy version of this song was posted on The FUMP shortly after The FUMP first went live. This is a much better version which was re-recorded after I learned how to count to four.

Lake Titicaca is a real place and there really is a scrotum frog that lives there. Telmatobius culeus, commonly known as the Titicaca water frog is a medium-large to very large and endangered species of frog in the family Telmatobiidae with loose fitting wrinkley skin. A somewhat sloppy version of this song was posted on The FUMP shortly after The FUMP first went live. This is a much better version which was re-recorded after I learned how to count to four.

This is one of the two songs that inspired me to launch off into doing comedy music. First I got the hook then knew I had to flesh this out into a full song and that the style for this must be country. I had so many guys singing overdubs because I wanted that big bar anthem type sound for the refrain. This is, of course, about those rare times when you look down into the toilet and just don't quite remember having corn recently, lol! I had some real steel guitar played for this to give it as twangy of a feel as possible. Please Follow and Subscribe at YouTube and IG (@kurplunkmusic) for new funny videos! Most songs from the new album can be heard (and seen!) at our YouTube channel plus behind the scenes content.

Mr. Burns singing about himself to the tune of Kiss The Girl from The Little Mermaid because why not? Lyrics by Ethan Mawyer. Vocals/Mr. Burns impression by Zachary Brown.

My most watched movies of all time are Alien and Aliens. So the time had come to pay tribute! Parody of "Holding Out For A Hero" by Bonnie Tyler New lyrics by Jeff Whitmire Music by Karaoke-Version.com Produced by Aaron Becker Vocals by Jeff Whitmire, Melissa Lewis, Shanna Stoker Henson, TheFifthSister, Judy Pancoast, and Aaron Becker

I had a couple friends post something about how when they vent on Facebook, people click that "Care" react emoji on their post but then never actually leave any kind of comments with encouragement, positive vibes, etc... just clicked a button and moved on, and how that felt so artificial because no effort went into that. So I was inspired to take a satirical take on it, by making an insistence that clicking that button was my way of actually telling whomever that that's my way of showing them support and letting them know I'm thinking about them. This song is a parody of "I'll Be There For You" by The Rembrandts, a song very familiar to anyone who has watched the 90s sitcom Friends.

So, I just turned 46 on this past Wednesday, and I've noticed as I get older, I'm finding it harder to trust...things. Words and Music: Insane Ian Mixing and Mastering: Ben Stahl

Sometimes the goal is: make something as stupid as you possibly can. Mission accomplished. Music: Bruce Springsteen Lyrics: SG and Niamh Bagnell Guitars, bass, drums, keyboards, kazoo, vocals, arrangement, production: SG Helpful suggestions: Sulu Video coming soon!

A new take on an old "classic", The War Crhymes inagural song is about some very specific holiday hijinks involving eggnog, attempting to escape Santa's gaze, and the joy of dancing .