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Today Erika is debunking one of the reasons why a lot of women are not having amazing sensual and sexual experiences, solo or partnered: The strive for perfection in sexual encounters, even if it's unconscious. If you tend to be too harsh with yourself and/or if you are in a long-term relationship, this episode is for you. Have you ever had the following thoughts? In order to have delicious sex and orgasms it all needs to be spontaneous and beautiful, the environment and mood must be ideal, there can't be any tension and you must get wet and horny immediately, If yes, that internal pressure on your body and pussy is blocking you from unparalleled sexual experiences and orgasms because it doesn't let you be fully present and get really intimate. When you are in a long-term relationship, it is not uncommon to leave the sexual experiences just for "when they happen." If they happen, there are strict expectations around them, and often the turn-on comes AFTER, but it is hardly ever maintained as a constant state of mind. Intimacy is about connecting, not perfection. Tune in and learn how to set the ground for consistency, maintain your turn-on, and eventually unlock unparalleled sexual pleasure and orgasms. In this episode: What is the big myth preventing you from experiencing sexual pleasure and orgasms. What's the enemy of delightful sexual encounters in long-term relationships. How to shift your mindset and "live" on the edge of having a fulfilling sexuality. Let's connect! Come join me and like-minded women in my FREE women-only, sex-positive community Pleasure Rebels Facebook Group Follow and reach out on IG Sign up to receive the BEST and most beautiful newsletter on the planet here Related Episodes 24: Harness your erotic power 22: An ancient practice that activates a dormant sexuality (Deer Exercise) 18: Super effective and empowered foreplay 08: The 5 Essential Tools to be TURNED ON

This week we've got LA-based dance artist/body wizard Stephanie Zaletel in the broadcast portal with us. GIVE THANKS! Church is served, honey! This episode is very much about the vital research of coming back home to yourself, your body and your essential creative voice, and the cost of not answering the call.  You KNOW we got up to some 12 step talk and wooooo baby the ancestral addiction to shame and emotional spirals that get lodged up in our tissues. Stephanie's exquisite research on the nervous system and somatic practices of care work and co-regulation are unmatched. The way she talks about her research and outlets for group practice is nothing short of stunning. Get somewhere soft and low to the ground to tee this one up.   Learn more about Stephanie HERE Follow I Care About Your Body on IG Stephanie's IG   Sign up for Melissa's Scrap the Plan workshop in August!   Book a 1:1 Creative Revival Session with Melissa Free Resources — Download Attention Reset - my free digital art zine on getting outta your head and into your body Stay Connected — Follow Melissa's Instagram for hot art memes Join Melissa's weeklyish newsletter for creative musings and studio news Big thanks to Ben Coleman for composing our theme music, and Gavin Bernard for vocals Sound Clip: Magic Stars Retro Sparkle by smokinghotdog via freesound.org

I've been recently getting more and more calls from moms who have a freezer full of pumped breastmilk and don't know what to do with it! If that's you, this is a must-listen episode!   Join The Birth Lounge   Connect with HeHe on IG   Sign up for a 1:1 consult for infant feeding support!

Themes: Brain Repatterning, Personal Development, Nervous System Regulation, Emotional Regulation SMOOTH SAILING MASTERCLASS Announcement: Sign Up for Cait's Upcoming Smooth Sailing Masterclass "How to Create a Blue Ocean Coaching Business through the Power of Nervous System Regulation" Join Cait on Tuesday, May 16 at 12 pm CST for an interactive masterclass experience to learn how to provide deeper transformation for your clients,, accelerate your coaching business revenue & reduce stress and burnout for good! Plus: how to shape the future of the coaching industry by leveraging somatic coaching, cutting edge nervous system tools and deeper personal embodiment. Episode details: Do you find yourself checking off your list of “should dos” but still feeling stuck in panic, anxiety, sadness or constant stress? Author and thought leader Adele Spraggon joins Lindsay and Cait to talk about her journey into the personal development and coaching industry-starting off with debilitating anxiety, but eventually reaching peace through developing what she calls “brain repatterning.” Learn about Adele's four step brain repatterning process, the neuroscience behind why it works, and how it can positively affect both your life and business. Adele Spraggon is an award winning author, speaker, thought leader, international trainer and fearless speaker. She has been awarded the 2020 Woman of Inspiration Award and in 2021 she was recognized as the Top Behavioural Expert of the year. Her book, “Shift: 4 Steps to Personal Empowerment,” has won three awards and is sweeping the globe, transforming how people are setting and achieving their goals.   Show Notes: -An intro to Adele and how she discovered brain repatterning; suffering from panic attacks and severe anxiety even while she was life coaching, she sought knowledge about the brain, which led her to developing her four step process of brain repatterning that she teaches today  -Adele's explanation of what a “pattern” really is in the brain; how the brain is wired; replacing an old, obsolete pattern with a brand new healthy one that serves you; what you can work on/heal through brain repatterning -Adele's version of the two hemispheres of the brain -How thoughts connect with physical sensations and emotional content; Our thoughts are not always true and they can be harmful if we can't disconnect them from reality -An example of a thought (“I'm not good enough”) going through the first two steps of Adele's four step method of brain repatterning  -A short explanation of the four steps: 1) Identify the pattern 2) Own it as a pattern 3) Tease apart the pattern 4) Replace it with a new pattern  -More examples from Adele of how to implement the four steps  -Reconnecting with your body after being in a state of fight or flight; reconnecting with both hemispheres of your brain -The four ways we can get stuck in a pattern: analyze, justify, catastrophize, or rebel -Learning to use the stress we are faced with to navigate towards peace -Instinct vs. intuition -Methods of addition and subtraction in personal development; addition is goal setting, striving, willpower; subtraction is surrender, letting go of your thoughts  -We can use our neuroplastic, malleable brains for good and to create peace in our lives, optimize patterns, and even hone in and focus on our intuition   -Resources: -Click here for a FREE copy of Adele's book and a FREE virtual class about brain “repatterning” -Click here to visit Adele's website -Click here to follow Adele on IG -Sign up for Cait's Smooth Sailing Masterclass on May 16 -Visit the Vital-Side Homepage here -Lindsay's Instagram: @myvitalside -Visit Lindsay's Website -Cait's Instagram: @caitrossco -Visit Cait's Website   Join our community: bit.ly/rewirethepodcast Podcast disclaimer can be found by visiting: bit.ly/rewiredisclaimer  

Themes: Chronic Illness Recovery, Personal Development, Community & Relationships SMOOTH SAILING MASTERCLASS Announcement: Sign Up for Cait's Upcoming Smooth Sailing Masterclass How to Create a Blue Ocean Coaching Business through the Power of Nervous System Regulation Join Cait on Tuesday, May 16 at 12 pm CST for an interactive masterclass experience to learn how to provide deeper transformation for your clients,, accelerate your coaching business revenue & reduce stress and burnout for good! Plus: how to shape the future of the coaching industry by leveraging somatic coaching, cutting edge nervous system tools and deeper personal embodiment. Episode details: How do the dynamics of relationships differ when one person has a chronic illness? Do you struggle with maintaining important relationships because of the complexity of communicating about your chronic condition? Joining Cait & Lindsay is founder of Chroniccon and self love guru Nitika Chopra. Nitika describes her beautiful path of self acceptance and love, from being a lonely child struggling with a chronic condition to the owner of a media and events company that helps people all over the country who live with chronic conditions of their own. Learn more about Nitika's company, how chronic illness changed the way she approaches relationships, and how to communicate about your own chronic illness with your loved ones.  Nitika Chopra is the founder of Chronicon, a media and events company, dedicated to elevating the lives of those living with a chronic illness. Nitika was diagnosed with psoriasis at the age of 10 and psoriatic arthritis at the age of 19 and lived over 17 years of her life being defined by her conditions. In 2010 she decided to take all of the lessons her health journey had taught her and use it to help others. Since the start of her entrepreneurial journey Nitika has hosted her own TV talk show on Z Living called Naturally Beautiful, hosted over 40 events with hundreds of guests in attendance and has created dynamic partnerships with over 150 brands in the wellness space. Nitika launched Chronicon in the fall of 2019, focused on those living with a chronic illness.  Since its launch, Chronicon has expanded online and you can now download the Chronicon app right to your phone and access it any time. This community is an accessible online space with inspiration, advocacy, and empowerment for chronically ill folks across the globe. You can also join Chronicon for its first live event since the pandemic, taking place on May 19th, in Brooklyn New York which can be streamed anywhere in the world.    Show Notes: -Nitika's health journey; how hitting rock bottom in her physical health led to a spiritual experience that changed her life and shifted her perspective on healing; Nitika held onto this experience as her anchor throughout her life  -Finding a balance of accepting chronic illness but not letting it become your identity; the importance of having a community when you have a chronic condition  -Discussing Chroniccon, the uplifting and empowering community that Nitika has created to support and empower  those with chronic illnesses; a safe space to discuss, heal, and enjoy activities together just the same as others do; “We're your new best friends!” -How navigating relationships can feel so different for someone chronically ill; Nitika's journey of self love and acceptance, and how her approach to relationships has changed over the years as she has healed more and more; why you should keep the focus on yourself and your own role in relationships as you're trying to break unhealthy patterns -Deconditioning beliefs around relationships; learning to communicate your needs with your loved ones and express how you are really feeling health wise instead of keeping it hidden  -The complex and nuanced nature of all relationships, including work dynamics; Nitika's tips and tools for healthy communication and boundaries   Resources: -Click here to visit Nitika's website -Click here to join the Chroniccon community  -Click here to follow Nitika on IG -Sign up for the Smooth Sailing Masterclass on May 16 -Cait's Instagram: @caitrossco -Visit Cait's Website -Visit the Vital-Side Homepage here -Lindsay's Instagram: @myvitalside -Visit Lindsay's Website   Join our community: bit.ly/rewirethepodcast Podcast disclaimer can be found by visiting: bit.ly/rewiredisclaimer  

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What's On Your Life Wish List? Keeping a Life Wish List can help you experience all the things you really want. All you need is paper and pen or your smartphone to get your list going. One of the best and easiest ways to keep your Life Wish List is to use a spiral notebook. This way, you can keep the list going wherever you are and can review it often. Follow on IG: ________________________________________ Sign up for my courses at Confidence 101: Course list: Becoming Your Beautiful Authentic Self Overcoming Obstacles Healing From Emotional Trauma Daily Success Rituals The Success Brain Freedom Journaling Mindset Reset Masterclass From Dream To Done This episode is also available as a blog post: https://capriciouslee.com/2021/09/08/whats-on-your-life-wish-list/ --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/cynthia-lee85/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/cynthia-lee85/support

Loving yourself makes you stronger and happier. You're more likely to put forth the effort to reach your goals when you appreciate your value. You're bound to feel more content because you'll treat yourself with compassion and respect, and seek out others who will do the same. Instead of making you selfish, loving yourself increases your capacity and willingness to serve others. On the other hand, that kind of confidence can be difficult to conjure up if you're used to self-criticism and doubts. Whether you're wild about the face you see in the mirror or trying to become a little more accepting, maybe it's time to look at your relationship with yourself. Try out these habits that are guaranteed to help you love yourself more. xoxo, Cynthia Lee Follow on IG: ________________________________________ Sign up for my courses at Confidence 101: Course list: Becoming Your Beautiful Authentic Self Overcoming Obstacles Healing From Emotional Trauma Daily Success Rituals The Success Brain Freedom Journaling Mindset Reset Masterclass From Dream To Done This episode is also available as a blog post: https://capriciouslee.com/2021/09/08/14-habits-guaranteed-to-make-you-love-yourself-more/ --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/cynthia-lee85/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/cynthia-lee85/support

Episode #037: A Startling Fact About Performance Anxiety Choking under pressure is a common response whether you're playing the lead in the third grade Christmas play or giving an important business presentation. Unfortunately, about 90% of people handle stressful situations poorly. A recent experiment shows that getting excited works better than trying to calm down. During a public singing contest, students were given various instructions. Those who said, “I am excited,” scored an average of 81% compared to 69% for those who said, “I am anxious,” and 53% for those who said, “I am calm.” Learn how to use anxiety to your advantage when you're in high-stress situations. These tips will help you to perform better even when your palms are sweating. xoxo, Cynthia Lee Follow on IG: ________________________________________ Sign up for my courses at Confidence 101: Course list: Becoming Your Beautiful Authentic Self Overcoming Obstacles Healing From Emotional Trauma Daily Success Rituals The Success Brain Freedom Journaling Mindset Reset Masterclass From Dream To Done This episode is also available as a blog post: https://capriciouslee.com/2021/08/25/a-startling-fact-about-performance-anxiety/ --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/cynthia-lee85/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/cynthia-lee85/support

Today we are talking with a globally known Life Coach for adults with ADHD, Kristen Carder. She is the founder of, I Have ADHD. Kristen is dedicated to supporting adults who have been diagnosed with ADHD, because honestly it's something that our generation is lacking in. When most people think of ADHD, their brains jump to children, especially young white boys. The truth is, there are so many adults struggling today due to undiagnosed ADHD.  Kristen digs deep to really help us understand what ADHD is, how it affects the brain, how it can impact every area of your life, and how medication can help certain things more than others. Listen to this episode to learn more about how ADHD can run someone's life when left untreated.Episode Highlights: About Kristen and her ADHD JourneyADHD in womenThe different presentations of ADHDFind More on Guest:I Have ADHD WebsiteI Have ADHD PodcastIG: @i.have.adhd.podcastI Have ADHD PinterestSymptoms List of ADHDLinks Mentioned in Episode/Find More on Jaime and The Mac House:Mac House Co. Main WebsiteClick Here to Join the Unfrump Yourself MasterclassGet the Confident Mom Method HereJoin Our FREE Unfiltered Motherhood Facebook Community HereMac House Co. IG Sign up for Summer School for Moms Here

If you have been here with me for a while now, you know last October that I was diagnosed with ADHD. Ever since then, I have been learning about the many, many ways that ADHD affects me and my day to day life. I believe there is so much confusion about what ADHD is, and what it looks like in adult women. So my hope is that this episode helps bring light to ADHD and its symptoms, and can help you be empathetic to those who struggle with ADHD, or encourage you to seek help if you, yourself, think you may struggle with ADHD.  Check out this episode to learn more!Things We Discussed In The Episode/Episode Highlights: The ways ADHD affect me Confusion about what ADHD is ADHD in adult womenLinks Mentioned in Episode/Find More on Jaime and The Mac House:Mac House Co. Main WebsiteClick Here to Join the Unfrump Yourself MasterclassGet the Confident Mom Method HereJoin Our FREE Unfiltered Motherhood Facebook Community HereMac House Co. IG Sign up for Summer School for Moms Here

How do you want to show up as a mom?Today we are talking with a Life Coach for moms, Shawna Scafe. She is teaching us how our personal values shape everything we do in our  lives. Without personal values, we tend to live our lives on autopilot and are very reactive to life around us. This may be a topic you never put a lot of thought into. However, the idea of living based on your values could be the mind shift you need to become the Mom you always wanted to be. Check out this episode to learn more about identifying values, and how to practically honor them on a day to day basis.Things We Discussed In The Episode/Episode Highlights: Personal ValuesNot living life on autopilot/reactiveChanging values in different seasonsValues in parenting and marriage Find More on Guest:IG: @simpleonpurpose.cahttps://simpleonpurpose.ca/dsc_0424/Twitter: @shawnascafeBuy the Life on Purpose Workbook Links Mentioned in Episode/Find More on Jaime and The Mac House:Mac House Co. Main WebsiteClick Here to Join the Unfrump Yourself MasterclassGet the Confident Mom Method HereJoin Our FREE Unfiltered Motherhood Facebook Community HereMac House Co. IG Sign up for Summer School for Moms Here

My mom returns to the podcast with some new thoughts about how she feels having a daughter who shares herself on the internet, the advice she would give mid-life women, and a long ago conversation between us in the car when she realized there was something...strange...about me.  I love to feature real conversations with friends and loved ones on this show. My mom is one of my favorite people, and I'm grateful she's willing to make these conversations public.  This was a fun, sweet hour together and I encourage YOU to sit down with someone this week and have a meaningful chat.  FULL SHOW NOTES HERE Sponsors: NOOM. Sign up for your trial at Noom.com/10Things Acorn.tv. Try Acorn.tv free for 30 days by using promo code you (all lowercase) * Thank you for listening to 10 Things To Tell You! Follow @10ThingsToTellYou on IG Follow @10ThingsToTellYou on FB Follow @laura.tremaine on IG Sign up for episode emails Join the 10 Things To Tell You Connection Group Listen to SECRET STUFF BUY Share Your Stuff. I'll Go First. by Laura Tremaine  

On this episode of My Husband Thinks I'm Crazy, Bailie dives into how to use your friends, mentors, and strangers on the internet to build your mindset and expand as a human instead of comparing yourself, which results in a downward spiral of negative thoughts. Follow Bailie's Expanders: (Term trademarked & credit to tobemagnetic.com) Lacy Phillips from ToBeMagnetic on IG My Boss Ass Mentor & Coach Mikayla Jai on IG (Sign up for her signature MMM program mentioning me and receive my FULL NATAL CHART READING FO FREE) The Balanced Blonde Samantha Daily

Codependency And Food, Weight, & Body Image with Cori Rosenthal How does codependency relate to food, weight & body image? How do codependents overeat, undereat, and everything in between to please others? How can you stop using food to deal with your codependency? Thanks for listening! Be sure to check out: www.codependummy.com @codependummy on IG Sign up for my free course Codependummy 101 at www.codependummy.com  In this podcast episode, Marissa speaks with Cori Rosenthal, a Santa Monica-based psychotherapist, about codependency, codependency's influence on weight, eating, and body image, and how Cori treats codependency with her clients. How does Cori define codependency? How did she cope with her own codependency? Marissa and Cori both open up about trying to undereat and please others then swinging to overeating to cope with all the stress throughout their 20s.  Meet Cori Rosenthal, LMFT, Santa Monica based marriage and family therapist (#98720) and mindfulness educator in private practice in Santa Monica.   She incorporates mindfulness, compassion practices and Brainspotting in her work with adolescents and adults. She specializes in working with intimacy and codependency, eating disorders, disordered eating, trauma, anxiety and depression. Cori is trained in Pia Melody's Post Induction Therapy for codependency, is certified in Brainspotting, and also is a Mindful Self-Compassion teacher. Cori@corirosenthal.com310-228-8081 www.corirosenthal.com In this podcast episode: Cori discusses what she believes contributes to the development of codependency in young women: developmental trauma. What's developmental trauma? Cori explains it all.  Cori talks about the connection between codependency and being “needless and wantless” when it comes to food, body size, and weight.  We discuss how you can stop coping with food and start being kinder to yourself, unfollow unhelpful social media accounts, and learn to say “no” so you don't end up coping with food!  Cori discusses what drove her to work specifically with codependents and their issues with food, weight, and body size. She opens up about how she started as a life coach and transitioned to becoming a licensed therapist after she saw the same thing over and over again: “My clients were codependent.” Cori had her own fears about graduate school but overcame her fear when she saw the need to learn more to serve her clients better. Cori discusses her difficulty in creating and making boundaries as a young woman. She shares about her dating messes and the “bad boys” she dated and was codependent with, including how he made decisions about what they did after school while she ignored her own plans. She let him run off with his plans while ignoring what she wanted and needed in the moment. Cori discusses how she was “easy going” and how “there's nothing easy going about being easy going.”  Marissa asks Cori about what she believes is the cause of codependency. Cori describes Pia Melody's teachings about how codependency is rooted in developmental trauma, meaning negative experiences you went through during your childhood and adolescence. It may be abuse, neglect, stress and how it's “subtle.” Cori and Marissa discuss multiple ways that birth order, family issues, sibling's issues, and parents level of presence can all be ways that contribute to abuse and neglect.  Cori talks about the connection between codependency and food. There are two ways she sees it: wanting to shrink yourself to be worthy versus coping with codependency by overeating, binging, and restriction. Cori discusses how food does offer “temporary relief from pain” and how that leads codependents to overeat to avoid the pain of the emptiness in their relationships.  Cori and Marissa discuss how comments about weight, whether positive or negative, are NOT HELPFUL, especially for codependents. If codependents are always seeking the attention, affection, and approval from others, then their weight loss or gain will be dependent on the feedback that they get from others and that can cause a lot of damage.  What about safety seeking through food? Cori discusses how we can be in control of our food to feel safe within ourselves. Marissa adds how this is not always conscious and how we may engage in overeating or restriction in an effort to feel like we are in control but unconsciously we want to feel safe.  Cori and Marissa talk about the influence of culture and how the media, television shows, movies, music, and etc. teach us to “equate who we are with our appearance.” Cori recalls a song she loved and how she would belt out “Invisible!” and how she worked to embody that. They reminisce about the songs they sang that reinforced them being small, wantless, needless, and codependent in their relationships.  Cori mentions mindfulness and how that can also help codependents “tolerate your own lived experience even when it's challenging, scary, or difficult.” She encourages those who are codependent to trust that they have themselves and will be able to handle what comes. “I've got me and it's okay.” Cori suggests three ways to start developing a healthier relationship with food and yourself. First, start to develop a kinder inner dialogue. Second, stop following any social media accounts that make you feel poorly about yourself. And third, start to say “No” as a complete sentence. Marissa emphasizes how this is so needed to promote intergenerational healing. Cori adds how we can start to talk about our wants, needs, boundaries we are proud of instead of what food group we have eliminated.  Be sure to check out Cori's meditation series that she mentions at the end. She has four meditations to help people create a healthier relationship with their bodies.  Helpful links: www.codependummy.com The Center Does Not Hold Pia Melody's Book Invisible song Love the Way You Lie song @body_redefined on IG Want to work with me? Go to www.therapywithmarissa.com or visit @therapywithmarissa on IG and Tiktok

What is it about codependency in therapists? How does codependency interweave with money and therapy? Can we choose better people to be codependent with? Thanks for listening! Be sure to check out: www.codependummy.com @codependummy on IG Sign up for my free course Codependummy 101 at www.codependummy.com  In this podcast episode, Marissa speaks with Tiffany McLain, a fee consultant about codependency, codependency in therapists, and codependency with money! ______________________________________________________________________ Meet Tiffany McLain, LMFT, a private practice fee strategist whose mantra is, “Full fees are the new black.” Via her program, The Lean In. MAKE BANK. Academy, she helps therapists ethically earn 30 to 50% more per month while seeing fewer clients by showing them how to think about and directly address fees in a clinically appropriate manner. www.heytiffany.com@tiffanymclain on IG ______________________________________________________________________ In This Podcast Sometimes codependency can benefit us if we choose the right people to be dependent on Tiffany and Marissa reflect on their experiences with codependency and how their knee-jerk reactions were more about “What does this other person need from me?” as opposed to “What do I need?” Tiffany provides examples, both recent and long-past, where she was taught to “not see what I see and not feel what I feel.” To start off, Marissa shares a funny story with Tiffany about how she was dependent and trying to please Tiffany as an instructor when they first met. Tiffany agrees and talks about how we can be thoughtful about who we surround ourselves with so we can please inspiring people, motivated people, and who we feel good being around.  Tiffany talks about what codependency means for her and how she resonated with a story about defaulting to please another person before she can check in or know to check in with herself. She shares stories about her codependency from her 20s and even more recent at 40! Tiffany mentions being a psychoanalyst--a form of therapy that focuses on the unconscious parts of ourselves that we don't know are there but highly impact our day-to-day decisions.  Tiffany talks about metaphors of her codependency, including being a balloon without anything to tether to or a cork in the ocean just floating with the waves. She discusses the extremes her relationships or experiences would get to because of her difficulty in asserting or maintaining boundaries. She adds the growth and progress she has made in creating boundaries thanks to being a mother and not tolerating the same boundary violations she experienced as a young woman...but still doubts herself, wonders if she is being dramatic, or acting “crazy.” It is evident that the healing and growth from codependency takes time, support, and reflection.  We also delve into how codependency is a form of sef-protection and how we seek safety in pleasing others. When reflecting, it can be obvious that it is self-sabotaging but it is so hard to see and believe if standing up for ourselves was unsafe as children.  Tiffany and Marissa discuss how codependency + money comes up often for helping professionals who often charge lower fees to avoid upsetting or inconveniencing their clients. Tiffany shares how she sees it come up for therapists again and again in their businesses. And then, how her ability to see it in others, led to her recognizing it in herself. She adds how she, as a therapist who uses psychoanalysis, sees codependency as having “aireless worlds,” where one's identity is only experienced through the eyes of others, namely a parent. “It's like being a siamese twin!” Tiffany and Marissa share their experiences working with clients and the healing journey they have ahead of them to resolve codependency. Tiffany shares how we first need to help a client separate from their families/primary caregivers AND THEN how they also need to separate from the therapist.  Tiffany also recognizes how “if you spot it, you got it.” She sees if often in therapists and then reflects on how she may be codependent with the therapists that she works with! She shares about overfunctioning, chasing students in her course, and doing the work for them. Tiffany adds a new motto for all of us codependummies to use that she learned from her coach: “I am responsible to you. I am not responsible for you.” She adds some real-life experiences of worrying it's her fault and taking action out of guilt--and ways she is taking more responsibility for herself so she can give responsibility to others.

In Part I, we discuss how you have been raised to be codependent How have you been set up to be codependent by your family, authority figures, and the education system.  Be sure to listen to Part II and Part III to hear about ways you have been reinforced and rewarded to be codependent! Thanks for listening! Be sure to check out: www.codependummy.com @codependummy on IG Sign up for my free course Codependummy 101 at www.codependummy.com  In This Podcast episode: Marissa walks through ways your family, society, teachers, and other authority figures raised you to put the needs of others above your own. You'll get details and examples to help you build awareness of how you have been raised to be codependent in your own life no matter where you are from or what type of family you had You're invited to reflect and think critically about the messages you received about what it meant to be a “good girl” growing up We start to normalize rather than pathologize your codependency--since you were set up to be this way. You are not crazy! Helpful links: www.codependummy.com Very Well Mind - What is codependency? Diagnostic Criteria for Codependency - Timmen Cermak Timmen Cermak - Wikipedia page Want to work with me? Go to www.therapywithmarissa.com  What is codependency? In this episode, we discuss Timmen Cermak's definition that he created around 1986. He talks about five essential features of codependency, one of them being “the assumption of responsibility of meeting others needs to the exclusion of meeting one's own needs.”  Isn't that motherhood? OR RATHER--is that fatherhood? Let's break it down: Assumption of responsibility For meeting others needs  To the exclusion of  Acknowledging one's own needs Marissa provides real-life examples of ways she was raised to be codependent. She also discusses ways she has seen it in other young women who were raised to put the needs of others above their own starting from a young age. Do you remember times when adults used guilt to make you feel bad about who you were, what you did, or what you said? What did those times teach you about speaking your mind, asserting your feelings, and maintaining boundaries?  Ask yourself: What's a time when you really learned that your needs are not as important as other people's needs?How have you been raised to believe that you are responsible for other people's needs? And how were you raised to put your own needs aside? Be sure to leave a rating and review! 

In Part I, we discussed how you have been raised to be codependent. In Part II, we will look at how you have been reinforced to put the needs of others above your own. How have you been set up to be codependent through the encouragement, modeling, and reinforcement from others. Be sure to listen to Part I and Part III to hear about ways you have been raised and rewarded to be codependent! Thanks for listening! Be sure to check out: www.codependummy.com @codependummy on IG Sign up for my free course Codependummy 101 at www.codependummy.com  In This Podcast episode: Marissa walks through ways you were encouraged, reinforced, and cheered on to please others--as it relates to her body. You'll get details and examples to help you build awareness of how you have been reinforced to be codependent in your own life from your parents, authority figures, and even your friends!  You're invited to reflect and think critically about the messages you received from others about what it meant when you were self-sacrificing and prioritized others above yourself. We start to normalize rather than pathologize your codependency--since you were set up to be this way. You are not crazy! Helpful links: www.codependummy.com Social Pressures Often Reinforce Codependency Interactions in Relationships: Codependency vs. Positive Reinforcement The Common Thread Between Food Addiction and Codependency How Food Addiction & Codependency Go Hand in Hand Want to work with me? Go to www.therapywithmarissa.com  What is codependency and how does it manifest other ways?  In this episode, we look at Karen Horney's definition of codependency as: “a magical belief that they will find an answer to life through others.” Marissa talks about how she was often reinforced to please others through her body. She discusses how she became “body conscious,” meaning hyper-concious and self-conscious of her body in order to get others approval, attention, and affection.  How has your body, weight, and relationship with food been dependent on the like, love, and approval from others? Marissa provides real-life examples of ways she was reinforced to be codependent as it relates to her weight--since she wanted others to like her so she figured she needed to stay small. She also discusses ways she has seen it in other young women who were reinforced to please others by maintaining a small body. Do you remember times when adults provided you messages about how they liked you for your beauty? Your brains? Your body? Your thoughtfulness? Your consideration? Ask yourself: What's a time when you really learned that you could please others by looking pretty? Being smart? Maintaining a small frame? Getting everything done on time? Cleaning the house? How did you learn to get the love you were pining for by meeting the expectations of others? Also, we look at the rules that codependents follow where they hold themselves to a higher, almost impossible standard out of feelings of unworthiness.  How has your codependency shown up in different ways? How does it manifest? What do you sense is underneath your symptoms and negative coping skills?  Be sure to leave a rating and review! 

In Part I, we discussed how you have been raised to be codependent. In Part II, we looked at how you have been reinforced to put the needs of others above your own. In Part III, we will cover how you have been REWARDED to put the needs of others above your own. You were set up sis to be codependent through the advantages, benefits, and opportunities you got thanks to working so hard to get everyone's attention, affection, and approval!  Be sure to listen to Part I and Part II to hear about ways you have been raised and reinforced to be codependent! Thanks for listening! Be sure to check out: www.codependummy.com @codependummy on IG Sign up for my free course Codependummy 101 at www.codependummy.com  In This Podcast episode: Marissa walks through ways you have benefited from, gained advantage, and received opportunities thanks to putting the needs of others above your own. You'll get details and examples to help you build awareness of how you have been rewarded for being a codependummy...and thus, set up to neglect yourself while prioritizing everyone else.  You're invited to reflect and think critically about the messages you received from others about what it meant when you were self-sacrificing and prioritized others above yourself. You were taught it was a good thing because you were rewarded for it! We start to normalize rather than pathologize your codependency--since you were set up to be this way. You are not crazy! Helpful links: www.codependummy.com The Benefits of Codependency THE BENEFITS OF CODEPENDENCY The High Functioning Codependent Theodore Millon Article on Codependency The Codependent Friendship Want to work with me? Go to www.therapywithmarissa.com  What is codependency and how does it manifest other ways?  In this episode, we look at how you may have been codependent in your relationships with other young women. From the framework of Theodore Millon, who in 1981, wrote that one trait of codependency is a need for “a stronger, nurturing figure and without one, they feel anxiously helpless. They're often conciliatory, placating, and self-sacrificing.” How has your codependency shown up in your friendships as a little girl, adolescent, tween, teen, and young women? And how have you been rewarded to be so giving, self-sacrificing, available in these friendship? Marissa provides real-life examples of ways she was rewarded to be codependent by “winning friends and influencing people” through her giving, pleasing, and placating stance in relation to others. She recalls friendships from high school, college, and career that were all codependent. Do you remember times when you were rewarded for being a nurturing figure in your friendships? What did your parents and other friends teach you about friendships and your role in them?  Ask yourself: What were your friendships like as a girl, adolescent and young women? Have you been the giver or receiver most of the time? How have you been codependent in your friendships? Also, think about how you can be codependent in some relationships while independent in other one's. How do you see your codependency with family compared to friends? With friends compared to coworkers?  Be sure to leave a rating and review! 

What are the long-term consequences of codependency? Can codependency lead to burn out, depression, anxiety, and quarter-life crisis? What can happen if you keep putting the needs of others above your own decade after decade? Are you finding yourself exhausted, exasperated, and enveloped in crap relationships? Thanks for listening! Be sure to check out: www.codependummy.com @codependummy on IG Sign up for my free course Codependummy 101 at www.codependummy.com  In This Podcast episode: Marissa walks through the long-term consequences of codependency, including the physical, emotional, and relational side effects You'll get details and examples to help bring awareness around your own codependency and how it is hurting, damaging, and causing destruction that you need to start addressing now! We continue to normalize rather than pathologize your codependency--since you were set up to be this way. You are not crazy! Helpful links: www.codependummy.com Codependent No More by Melody Beattie Codependent No More Workbook by Melody Beattie Long-term effects of co-dependency during or after college Want to work with me? Go to www.therapywithmarissa.com  What are the long-term consequences of codependency? What will happen if you continue to put the needs of others above your own? According to the literature, in the later stages of codependency, you may experience feeling lethargic, feeling depressed, withdrawing from your relationships, becoming isolated from your relationships, losing your daily routine and structure, abusing or neglecting your children/other responsibilities, hopelessness, planning escapes from relationships you feel trapped in, suicidality, violence towards others or yourself via self-harm, becoming physically/emotionally/mentally ill, developing an eating disorder (or other type of addiction related to food/body/weight), or becoming addicted to alcohol and/or other drugs.  What stands out to you? How are you coping with your codependency in ways that are starting to take a toll on your health and your relationships? Marissa gives real-life examples and shares about her “rock bottom” related to her codependency. She was 20 years old, single, lonely in her apartment, weighed about 40 pounds more than she does today, and codependent up to her eyeballs. After being everything for everyone, she became nothing to no one...including herself. She had dedicated so much time and energy to pleasing her family, professors, friends, and a romantic interest all to no avail. Then, the pendulum swung and she was depressed, anxious, withdrawn, and not pleasing anyone or herself. Have you experienced the same in your codependency where, maybe you weren't suicidal, but ambivalent towards life? While listening, see what stands out to you about your codependency and how it is starting to take its toll on you.  You'll also hear about her motivation to create this podcast in order to a) spare you from the agony, suffering, and pain of codependency and b) help you transform from a codependummy to a codependiamond! Be sure to leave a rating and review! 

Codependency as described in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual (DSM-5) What is “dependency,” codependency, and what are the common traits? How are you, me, and everyone we know codependent? Thanks for listening! Be sure to check out: www.codependummy.com @codependummy on IG Sign up for my free course Codependummy 101 at www.codependummy.com  https://www.facebook.com/groups/codpendummy In This Podcast episode: Marissa walks through the diagnosis for Dependent Personality Disorder You'll get details and examples on how you have been set up to be dependent on others at home, school, work (i.e., everywhere) You're invited to reflect and ask yourself “Am I codependent? Am I a codependummy? And how come?” We start to normalize rather than pathologize your codependency Helpful links: www.codependummy.com Psychology Today - Dependent Personality Disorder Want to work with me? Go to www.therapywithmarissa.com  What's dependent personality disorder? “A pervasive and excessive need to be taken care of.” Marissa talks about how pervasive codependency can be: parents, partner, peers, and pool hall staff. This leads to “submissive and clinging behavior and fears of separation.”  Isn't this everyone? You mean to tell me that this is a diagnosis? When I learned about this in graduate school, I thought “Ugh...this is me.” Are these symptoms also you:  has difficulty making everyday decisions without an excessive amount of advice and reassurance from others; needs others to assume responsibility for most major areas of your life has difficulty expressing disagreement with others because of fear of loss of support or approval (isn't that everyone???) has difficulty initiating projects or doing things on your own because of a lack of self-confidence in judgment or abilities rather than lack of motivation or energy goes to excessive length to attain nurturance and support from others to the point of volunteering to do things that are unpleasant  feels uncomfortable or helpless when alone due to exaggerated fears of being unable to care for yourself  urgently seeks another relationship as a source of care and support when a close relationship ends (any type) unrealistically preoccupied with fears of having to take care of yourself Marissa also gives real-life examples of when she let others make decisions for her, gave into pressure to please and impress others, and the consequences of allowing the needs of others to be more important than her own. You'll hear about her difficulties staying in college, creating healthy boundaries--especially with men, and other codependent adventures! Hear how Marissa recognizes how she contributed to her excessive dependency on others and how that got her into codependent dilemmas since she ignored her intuition, kept silent, and put others' comfort over her own. If you find yourself feeling codependent with others in multiple areas in your life--this episode is a must listen! Be sure to leave a rating and review!  Youtube channel coming soon→stay tuned for the link! 

Welcome to The Codependummy Podcast Who, What, When, Where, Why, & How of the podcast answered! What's a “codependummy?” What's the intention of this podcast and who is it for? Thanks for listening! Be sure to check out: www.codependummy.com @codependummy on IG Sign up for my free course Codependummy 101 at www.codependummy.com https://www.facebook.com/groups/codpendummy In This Podcast episode: Marissa introduces herself and the term codependummy You hear about the who, what, when, where, why, and how of the podcast Marissa shares her background and motivation to create the podcast You learn why this podcast as made for you, sis Helpful links: www.codependummy.com Want to work with me? Go to www.therapywithmarissa.com or visit @therapywithmarissa on Instagram/Tiktok As a young woman, you have been raised, reinforced, and rewarded to put the needs of others above your own, Now, in your 20s, you're finding yourself exhausted, exasperated, and enveloped in dissatisfying relationships. This podcast was made to help you stop being such a codependummy and shine like a codependiamond!  Marissa discusses the pain, agony, and suffering she went through during her 20s thanks to her codependency and her goal to help you bypass all of that.  A codependummy is the perfect term for the codependent women out there who often are self-deprecating, self-annihilating, and self-criticizing themselves and their behavior all the time. The things we do to get the attention, affection, and approval from others is stupid. This podcast is all about helping you to stop playing small and start taking up space, ya dummy!  Codependiamond = healthy relationship with self and other as the goal.  Youtube channel coming soon→stay tuned for the link!