POPULARITY
Categories
This episode features guest hosts Dr. Scott Waltman and Kasey Pierce, authors of the forthcoming book The Rescuer Trap. Is it a gut Instinct or gut Infection? This week, we talk to Massimo Pigliucci about why the brain is essentially a ‘b******t' machine and how to stop being a doormat by embracing ancient doubt. By the end of the episode, Pigliucci leaves Kasey and Scott grappling with the fundamental question: Whose Socrates is it anyway? (the Stoics' or the Skeptics'?) Are you the fixer, the over-giver, the emotional first responder for everyone but yourself? Welcome to The Rescuer Trap. We playfully own the labels “Parentified and Codependent” to make a point: these are not identities, but learned behaviors.Stoicism: Philosophy as a Way of Life is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber.And what can be learned can be unlearned. Hosts Dr. Scott Waltman and Kasey Pierce use Stoic philosophy and CBT to give you the tools to break the cycle and reclaim your autonomy. Your escape from the trap starts here. Based on the forthcoming book, The Rescuer Trap (New Harbinger).Thanks for reading Stoicism: Philosophy as a Way of Life! This post is public so feel free to share it. Get full access to Stoicism: Philosophy as a Way of Life at donaldrobertson.substack.com/subscribe
What if the reason you can’t say no isn’t weakness, but conditioning? From childhood, so many of us were taught that love had to be earned, that being good meant staying quiet, agreeable, and available. But somewhere along the way, that survival strategy became self-betrayal. In this powerful episode, bestselling author and trauma recovery coach Lisa A. Romano reveals the truth about codependency: it’s not about needing others too much, but about forgetting who you are. She explains why guilt floods your body when you set a boundary and how healing begins the moment you realise your inner critic isn’t actually your voice—it’s an echo from your past. This is a conversation for anyone who’s tired of people-pleasing, over-giving, or shrinking themselves to keep the peace. Because real love doesn’t require you to abandon yourself. It begins the moment you come home to you. The Woman Who Broke the Cycle Lisa A. Romano didn’t just study codependency—she lived it. Growing up with parents who were adult children of alcoholics, one highly narcissistic and the other deeply codependent, Lisa carried shame throughout her entire childhood. She believed something about her made it impossible for her parents to love her. This pattern followed her into adulthood. She married a man similar to her mother, repeating the cycle of seeking approval and subjugating herself. After a severe breakdown and six therapists, she finally received the diagnosis that changed everything: codependency. The tragedy that catalysed her mission came when her brother-in-law, also an adult child of alcoholics, took his own life. In that devastating moment, Lisa realised that if he had understood codependency and childhood trauma the way she now did, he might still be alive. She pushed past her fears of what her family would think and published her first book, “The Road Back to Me,” which became an Amazon bestseller overnight. Today, as a certified life coach and leading expert in codependency and childhood trauma recovery, Lisa has helped over 5,000 students heal through her signature 12-week Breakthrough Method, blending neuroscience, trauma-informed coaching, mindfulness, and spiritual wisdom. What Codependency Actually Means “When you’re codependent, you don’t know that you’re codependent until your life becomes unmanageable,” Lisa explains. It operates completely below conscious awareness, a loop of childhood trauma disguised as personality. Codependency isn’t just people-pleasing. It’s people-pleasing from a loss of selfhood. It’s cleaning the house but needing your husband to walk in and pat you on the back. Making his favorite meal but requiring him to make a big deal about it. Watching your sister’s kids but expecting her to watch yours in return without having to ask. “With codependency, it’s an emotional enmeshment,” Lisa reveals. “I lose my sense of self and I’m emotionally reliant on someone in a very unhealthy way, and I don’t even realize it.” The dangerous part? Codependents often think they’re “the good one.” They’re the fixers, the caretakers, the ones always willing to listen. But beneath that giving is resentment, unmet expectations, and the victim mentality that comes from abandoning yourself while trying to avoid being abandoned by others. Why You Can’t Say No: The Childhood Programming The guilt you feel when setting boundaries isn’t random. It’s precisely programmed survival wiring from your first three years of life. “Your needs aren’t being served, your ego-based needs from zero to three,” Lisa explains. “You’re in a theta brainwave state, which is a hypnotic brainwave state.” During this critical period, if your narcissistic needs—the healthy developmental need to matter, to be seen, to have your feelings validated—go unmet, you don’t develop a solid ego boundary. Between ages three and five, children are supposed to be “little narcissists.” The adults around them should be managing what shows up inside them, helping them emotionally regulate, and teaching them that their feelings matter. When this doesn’t happen, children learn that they don’t have the right to feel, and therefore don’t have the right to set boundaries. “If I say no, I might get abandoned or criticised or judged or shamed or banished from the kingdom,” Lisa describes. “That’s all stored.” The brain creates a predictive model: saying no produces guilt as a way to prevent abandonment. You’re abandoning yourself to avoid outer abandonment. Operating Below the Veil “Below the veil of consciousness, we’re just operating on a loop,” Lisa says. “We’re operating on childhood trauma. These are belief systems. They’ve become habitual thoughts. It becomes part of our persona.” The subconscious mind is 500,000 to a million times stronger than the conscious mind. Most of your daily interactions are products of subconscious beliefs you’ve never questioned. You’re not living authentically—you’re recycling thoughts and patterns downloaded in childhood. “It’s hard to be yourself when you were taught that yourself was not worthy of love,” Lisa reflects. “How do you love a self that your childhood conditioned you to believe was not worthy of love?” The terror of being authentic becomes greater than the pain of being inauthentic. So you stay small, you people-please, you anticipate everyone else’s needs, and you resent them for not reading your mind. The Deep Questions That Activate Healing Lisa believes the gateway to transformation is uncomfortable self-inquiry: “How happy am I? How excited am I to get up in the morning? Do I really like my partner or do I resent them?” These are the questions we avoid by going to yoga and drinking Starbucks, she says with a laugh. We go through the motions in our relationships without examining how we’re showing up. “Do I say yes when I mean no? Do I race to solve other people’s problems with the intention for them to see me and find worthiness in me? Am I taking care of everybody else at the expense of myself? Am I secretly resentful?” These self-inquiring questions activate metacognition—the ability to observe your own thoughts and patterns from a higher state of consciousness. “There is no healing without metacognition,” Lisa emphasises. Without engaging your prefrontal lobe and neocortex, you’re stuck operating from the amygdala, hippocampus, and brainstem—pure thinking, feeling, and reacting with no space between stimulus and response. Stepping Out of Ego to Find Your True Self Lisa’s breakthrough came when she stopped identifying with her ego and recognised it as a product of her five senses and childhood downloads. “That’s my ego’s language, but that’s not my true identity,” she explains. She uses a powerful metaphor: “If I was in the middle of the ocean hanging onto a log, and the ego was that log, I’m not letting go until I see a raft. And I’m not jumping off the raft until I see a cruise ship.” Her life raft was this realisation: “These are all false beliefs. I am enough. If I had been born to a healthy mother, I wouldn’t think these thoughts.” The “I’m not enough” narrative was contingent on what happened to her, not who she actually was. “My divine essence is I’m an extension of source,” Lisa says. “Whoever and whatever created this entire cosmos created me. My inner child was always worthy, always worthy. I was just born to unhealthy dynamics.” Every flower leans toward the sun. Why should you stay in the shade? The Power of Meditation: Slowing Down the Loop When Lisa realised her negative self-talk was just reverberations of her mother’s constant criticism—not her actual thoughts—it terrified her. “Who the hell’s steering the ship?” she wondered. Her solution was meditation, sometimes for four to five hours a day. “I knew I had to empty my mind of this crazy self-talk that was so self-sabotaging and focused on what’s going to happen next.” The results were almost immediate. After 40 minutes to an hour, she could sit up and observe. If the monkey mind returned, she’d lie back down and do another session. Each time, the chatter slowed further. “Once I emptied the mind, it was like the observer within me was born. That’s metacognition. Now suddenly I’m outside of my mind observing. Now I can catch a negative thought. Now I can catch a codependent thought.” Healing Relationships Without Cutting Everyone Out One of the most common questions Lisa receives: “How do I heal without cutting people out of my life?” Her answer: surrender. “Surrender to this idea that I’m doing this deep healing work. Surrender that just because I’m doing this work doesn’t mean my partner is going to be doing this work. I surrender to their confusion about who I’m becoming.” The reality is nuanced. Some people shouldn’t stay in your life—those who are aggressive, manipulative, or actively exploiting your abandonment fears. When you try to assert yourself and they bash you for daring, that’s a sign. But other relationships can evolve. Lisa’s been with her second husband for 15 years. “He doesn’t believe in everything that I believe, and I freaking love that as a recovering codependent because I can tolerate that. I don’t need his approval. I don’t need him to agree with me.” He supports her completely even though he doesn’t fully understand her work. “That’s unconditional love,” Lisa says. “Why does that person have to change to make me happy if that person has goodwill towards me?” Expecting your partner to think exactly like you? That’s still codependency. Breaking Generational Trauma “Nature has no other recourse but to create by default unless the human being awakens,” Lisa explains. The apple doesn’t fall far from the tree. You’re 75% more likely to become an alcoholic if your father was an alcoholic. It’s biology, environment, emotion, vibration—everything you were around. “Nature will create through default patterns until you awaken, until there’s a cycle breaker in a generation.” Lisa sees her clients as unsung superheroes. “What you have done is you’ve halted this trauma into future generations. You have changed the collective matrix in which we all bathe in. The natural thing is to remain unconscious and do what was done to you. Not the healthiest, not the most fulfilling, but the most natural and innocent.” Her 12-week program moves through three phases: understanding what happened to you (the inner child’s wounds), moving into gentle accountability (it’s still your subconscious mind now), and ascension (how do we manage and emotionally regulate from a higher state). “You can’t fix a hole in the wall that you don’t see,” she says. Once you develop compassion for yourself, that trumps shame. Only then can you offer your parents compassion—but not before you develop self-empathy. Three Golden Nuggets for Your Healing Journey Golden Nugget #1: Find the Space Between Your Thoughts “One of the most powerful things you can do on your journey is to find the space between your thoughts,” Lisa emphasises. The mind runs on a loop, a consistent stream of what we assume is consciousness, but it’s mostly from the subconscious mind. “If you could practice finding the space between your thoughts, you could activate metacognition. It slows everything down.” Golden Nugget #2: Feelings Aren’t Facts “A big reality check, narcissism check, self-righteous check, arrogance check is: wait a minute, my feelings aren’t facts. They’re just opinions.” Your beliefs have probably changed over the past 25 years. But when you believed something 25 years ago, you thought it was a fact. This awareness creates humility and openness to growth. Golden Nugget #3: Emotional Neglect IS Trauma “Brain scans prove that children who grow up feeling ignored and invisible, their brain on a brain scan is similar to a child that has experienced domestic violence and physical abuse. It’s the same.” The hippocampal volume is smaller. The amygdala is lit up. Because feeling ignored is akin to death for a child. The same trauma responses, cortisol responses, and nervous system wiring are activated. Understanding what happened in your first three years of life is crucial. If you struggle with codependency, low self-worth, or boundaries, your nervous system was wired for survival during that period. You developed an aversion to abandonment and became sensitised to it, which fuels codependency and unhealthy emotional dependence. “Being emotionally neglected is trauma. Understand why. If you relate to anything we’ve shared today, you might be able to trace it back to those early developmental years.” About Lisa A. Romano Lisa A. Romano is a bestselling author, certified life coach, and leading expert in codependency and childhood trauma recovery. With over 5,000 students healed through her signature 12-week Breakthrough Method, she blends neuroscience, trauma-informed coaching, mindfulness, and spiritual wisdom to help adult children restructure their subconscious programs, build emotional resilience, and manifest intentional lives. She is the author of multiple books including “The Road Back to Me” and has built a global community through her online programs, YouTube channel, podcast, and social media presence. Key Takeaway You are not destined to repeat the patterns programmed into you as a child. The guilt, resentment, and self-abandonment you experience aren’t character flaws—they’re survival strategies from a nervous system that learned love was conditional. When you activate metacognition through meditation and self-inquiry, you can observe these patterns from outside the loop. When you step out of ego and claim your inherent worthiness, you become the cycle breaker your lineage has been waiting for. Coming home to yourself means releasing the belief that you must earn love by abandoning who you are. Watch the full conversation on YouTube Find Out More About Lisa A. Romano Website: https://www.lisaaromano.com Follow on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/CodependencyandNarcissisticAbuseLifeCoach/ Follow on Instagram: @lisaaromano YouTube Channel: @lisaaromano1
Codependents, people-pleasers, those who fawn, seek approval, and external validation, do not consciously understand why they are so frustrated and unhappy. Codependency and fawning are trauma responses that all lead to anger, and resentment. Oftentimes, those who are struggling with emotional and mental health issues, who seek help, are misunderstood when they are codependent. Their symptoms are vague, yet incredibly disruptive and tormenting. When a codependent seeks help, they complain about others, because they have been programmed to believe that someone or something outside of them is the cure for their ills. In this episode, Lisa A. Romano reveals how knowledge helps us organize the mind. Taking an objective look at our family of origin history helps unlock the secrets to why we do what we do, think what we think, and feel what we feel. When Lisa was finally diagnosed with codependency, and her therapist helped her investigate her family history, feeling stuck, angry, and resentful all began making sense. Today you will learn about:
This episode features guest hosts Dr. Scott Waltman and Kasey Pierce, authors of the forthcoming book The Rescuer Trap. Kasey asks Scott “Can the argument be made for the overachiever's mindset?”; and reveals she used to be a spinning-wheels ‘bro'. Are you the fixer, the over-giver, the emotional first responder for everyone but yourself? Welcome to The Rescuer Trap. We playfully own the labels “Parentified and Codependent” to make a point: these are not identities, but learned behaviors.Stoicism: Philosophy as a Way of Life is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber.And what can be learned can be unlearned. Hosts Dr. Scott Waltman and Kasey Pierce use Stoic philosophy and CBT to give you the tools to break the cycle and reclaim your autonomy. Your escape from the trap starts here. Based on the forthcoming book, The Rescuer Trap (New Harbinger).Thanks for reading Stoicism: Philosophy as a Way of Life! This post is public so feel free to share it. Get full access to Stoicism: Philosophy as a Way of Life at donaldrobertson.substack.com/subscribe
Codependent patterns in relationships can be hard to spot. They are often deeply subconscious; that is, they show up in how you feel, not how you think.Tune into this week's Soul Sovereignty & Sexuality Podcast on How to End Codependent Patterns in Relationships.You can listen on iTunes, Spotify, or YouTube.For 11 years, I have been documenting the deeply embedded subconscious beliefs that create codependency, unequal power dynamics, and patterns of self-denial in relationships. It started with identifying my own unhealthy relationship patterns. Then, I began to research religious history, mythology, and ancient civilizations to get to the root of my beliefs.When I began working with clients from around the world in 2021, I realized I wasn't alone. Every single one - regardless of their country of origin - faced similar subconscious beliefs and patterns.The beautiful news is that you can unravel yourself from the inherited beliefs and absorbed social conditioning. You can unbind yourself from the expectations and shoulds and supposed tos. You can free yourself from patterns of self-silencing, self-denial, and self-sacrifice.I'm here to support you to reclaim your sovereignty and embody your power so you experience true freedom.When we work together in a 1:1 Divine Activation Portal, we dive straight into your soul's truth and release all that is not your truth. Through energy work and activations through light language, you shift out of old ways of being. We also do the thought, belief, and emotional repatterning to rewire your whole system.Begin here: https://thepathtosovereignty.com/reclaimyoursovereignty-relationship-coach/If you prefer group support on a regular basis, check out the Temple of Divine Feminine Power. This month we're diving deep into how to embody your boundaries. In January we'll root into the wisdom of your womb, and in February you will be guided to speak your truth.Join here:https://thepathtosovereignty.com/temple-of-divine-feminine-power/Plus, be sure to receive your FREE GIFT: A Womb Meditation to Activate your Sexual Life Force Energy. Do so here:https://thepathtosovereignty.com/sign-up-to-receive-your-free-gift/About your Host Jessica Falcon:A former lawyer turned mystic, Jessica Falcon is an International Soul Embodiment Guide & Relationship Coach. She guides you to embody your power, reclaim your sovereignty, and experience true freedom.After leaving the legal profession in 2013 to embark on a spiritual pilgrimage, Jessica experienced an 8-year initiation into divine feminine power. During this time, she spent years researching religious history, ancient civilizations, and mythology. She has identified the core beliefs – deeply embedded in the individual and collective psyche – that keep us from owning our power, speaking our truth, and liberating our sexuality.Jessica hosts the Soul Sovereignty & Sexuality Podcast. She leads retreats, workshops, and online portals of transformation so you embody your sacred sovereignty. Jessica is an expert on guiding you into the depths of your body and creating internal safety so you can fully be and express all of who you are.Learn more at https://www.thepathtosovereignty.com This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit soulsovereigntyandsexuality.substack.com/subscribe
Have you ever been accused of being a problem simply because you brought up a problem? In healthy relationships, it is essential that couples feel safe and are on the same page. It is normal to want your relationship to grow, and to wonder where the line is when it comes to bringing things to your partner's attention that you would like to change. However, there are red flags you need to be aware of particularly if you struggle with fawning, people pleasing, insecure attachment and tend to be the codependent partner in relationships. In this episode, Lisa A. Romano Codependency Expert and Breakthrough Life Coach, helps us get clear about some communication guidelines that can help us make clear, logical, and fair decsions about our relationships. Does your partner accuse you of being the only problem simply because you want to talk about a problem? Are they passive-aggressive, and do they punish you for bringing up an issue you'd like to work out? Do they deny a problem exists at all, making it impossible for you to experience any movement forward in your relationship or resolution? Are you being gaslit, devalued, or ignored for talking about a real issue? Consider these red flags, and also ask yourself: Does my partner have the willingness to listen? Are they capable of real change? Do they want to work on the relationship? Before walking away or making any major life decisions, getting clear about your partner's behaviors, intentions, and level of willingness to discuss, change, or work on marital issues, allows you to act on your own behalf with confidence rather than codependently. Ready to Conquer the Inner Child Wounds that Keep You Repeating Codependency? Click below to learn more about The 12 Week Breakthrough Coaching Program—a trauma-informed, neuroscience-based coaching program created specifically for adult children of narcissistic, neglectful, or emotionally immature caregivers, who are ready to ascend the chains of the past. Inside the program, you'll be guided through: Brain retraining techniques rooted in neuroscience Inner child healing and self-concept reorganization Neuroscience Backed Journaling prompts and assessments to increase self-awareness Tools to stop subconscious self-abandonment and start living from your true self Embrace shadow work from a higher state of consciousness to experience integration This method has helped thousands heal from complex trauma and break toxic generational patterns, with tools to rewire limiting beliefs and build authentic self-worth.
This episode features guest hosts Dr. Scott Waltman and Kasey Pierce, authors of the forthcoming book The Rescuer Trap. Scott and Kasey explore how people-pleasing tendencies sabotage effective inbox management and tackling other neuroticisms that have us living for others.Are you the fixer, the over-giver, the emotional first responder for everyone but yourself? Welcome to The Rescuer Trap. We playfully own the labels “Parentified and Codependent” to make a point: these are not identities, but learned behaviors.And what can be learned can be unlearned. Hosts Dr. Scott Waltman and Kasey Pierce use Stoic philosophy and CBT to give you the tools to break the cycle and reclaim your autonomy. Your escape from the trap starts here. Based on the forthcoming book, The Rescuer Trap (New Harbinger).Thanks for reading Stoicism: Philosophy as a Way of Life! This post is public so feel free to share it. Get full access to Stoicism: Philosophy as a Way of Life at donaldrobertson.substack.com/subscribe
The holidays can bring joy—but they can also bring stress, guilt, people-pleasing, and old relationship patterns that resurface year after year. In this live Q&A, we're talking about how to navigate difficult relationships, family dynamics, and codependency triggers during the holiday season. Join us at 7:30 PM EST for God's solution and get ready to live in freedom as He intended! God has timeless truths to help you navigate life and live in freedom as He intended. Join us LIVE on Mondays at 7:30 PM ET where we answer your questions on how to Conquer Codependency God's Way. Do you have a question you would like Aliene to address? We've got you! Just leave your question in the comments below or email questions@treasuredministries.com Don't forget to like, subscribe, and leave a comment if this episode resonates with you! For more information/resources check out the links below: ⇨ Visit the Treasured Ministries Website: https://treasuredministries.com/ ⇨ Join the Treasured Tribe https://treasuredtribe.com/ ⇨ Sign up for our FREE newsletter and get inspiration for your faith journey https://treasuredministries.activehos... ⇨ Donate: https://treasuredministries.com/donate/ ⇨Sign up for retreat https://treasuredministries.com/retreat/ _____________________ Treasured Ministries provides discipleship, biblical resources, and community for women so they can exchange codependency for God dependency and thrive. For more information visit https://treasuredministries.com ______________________ Aliene Thompson is the president of Treasured Ministries International, the creator of the Nourish Bible Study Method, and the founder of the Treasured Tribe, an online Christian community for women. Her popular series on YouTube, "Conquering Codependency God's Way", helps women worldwide move from codependency to God dependency so they can live in freedom as God intended. #codependence #conqueringcodependency
Codependency is an umbrella term used to describe a broad spectrum of emotional, mental and behavioral, subconscious, and automatic trauma responses developed in early childhood as an adaptation to chronic, inescapable stress. While over-functioning as a small child, to avoid rejection, the child's nervous system learns to scan their environment for potential threats. This scanning is called hypervigilance, and it also exiles the inner child into an abyss. Children of toxic, dysfunctional parents, families, and circumstances are denied the compassionate adult, whose role is to mentor, teach, and guide a child in a way that nurtures a positive sense of self. The very basics of healthy human interraction are not modeled. A child who has learned they must scan their environment must: Use their conscious waking hours scanning their parents' facial expressions, moods, and tones--while this is occurring, a child is learning how to morph and adapt, rather than explore the inner self, their inner child, their inner landscape Abandoning the self, including their innate needs, wants, emotions, and right to be authentic, to avoid further emotional neglect, abuse, bullying, or rejection—while this survival response was useful during childhood, the adult child eventually learns that they often don't know what they want or need. This can be a frustrating experience in therapy and relationships. If you are codependent, you may have felt frustrated in therapy when asked, "What do you need" What do you want?" Codependents do not know what they need. They Struggle to Trust Their Inner World Codependency is built on self-abandonment. Many codependents grew up in environments where their emotions were dismissed, mocked, punished, or ignored. Carl Jung would say their inner child—what he called the "Divine Child"—was exiled. So when asked: "What do you feel?" "What do you want?" "What do you need?" …they genuinely do not know. This creates enormous frustration in therapy, because the inner world feels foreign, inaccessible, or even dangerous. The codependent has learned to trust external authority over inner intuition. Reconnecting with the inner self requires time, patience, and the slow dismantling of shame. Therapy asks them to return to a Self they have never been allowed to meet. The journey back home must be slow, steady, and compassionate; otherwise, therapy can sometimes cause more harm than good and lead to a codependent person trying to please the therapist, thereby reenacting a facet of their adaptation survival response. Begin Your Healing Journey: Lisa introduces her signature 12 Week Breakthrough Method—a trauma-informed, neuroscience-based coaching program created specifically for adult children of narcissistic, neglectful, or emotionally immature caregivers. Inside the program, you'll be guided through: Brain retraining techniques rooted in neuroscience Inner child healing and self-concept reorganization Neuroscience Backed Journaling prompts and assessments to increase self-awareness Tools to stop subconscious self-abandonment and start living from your true self Embrace shadow work from a higher state of consciousness to experience integration This method has helped thousands heal from complex trauma and break toxic generational patterns, with tools to rewire limiting beliefs and build authentic self-worth.
Subscribe in a reader If you're divorcing a narcissist, you may be tempted to use your therapy records to prove PTSD or emotional abuse in court. But handing over those records can backfire in devastating ways. In this powerful conversation with Bree Bonchay—psychotherapist and founder of World Narcissistic Abuse Awareness Day—we break down the hidden […] The post Why You Should Never Use Therapy Records in a Narcissist Divorce | w/ Bree Bonchay appeared first on Narcissist Abuse Support.
Christian codependency can affect whether you are a healthy or a codependent caregiver. When you need to care for someone in your life, it is never easy. Whether it is caring for an elder parent, a mentally ill or disabled child, or a chronically sick spouse, you will need to be intentional about the boundaries you set. It is hard to figure out how to take care of yourself when the demands are overwhelming. Watch this video for caregiver support in finding out how you can be a healthy, instead of a codependent caregiver. It will change your life. #codependent #christiancodependency #settingboundaries #caregiversupport Website: https://www.changemyrelationship.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/ChangeMyRelationship YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@changemyrelationship Watch this video on YouTube: https://youtu.be/y-xAtNkZYVw
In this episode, I'm diving into a topic that sits quietly underneath so many of the patterns that show up after infidelity: codependency. This isn't about weakness or being "too much." It's about the survival strategies many of us learned long before betrayal ever entered our lives. For me, this past year has been one of shedding—shedding identities, patterns, and ways of disappearing inside relationships. I'm inviting you into that same gentle, honest exploration so you can begin reclaiming your own energy, boundaries, and clarity. I share the real signs of codependency, why it intensifies after infidelity, and how to begin unhooking from patterns that pull you away from yourself. You'll learn how to shift from survival mode into a grounded, independent place where your choices come from truth, not fear. Takeaways: How codependent patterns form (and why they're not your fault) Seven signs you're losing yourself in the relationship How to begin reclaiming your energy and boundaries Why independence is a necessary step before rebuilding trust If something in this episode stirs something in you, that is not a problem. It means you're waking up. If you're ready to untangle these patterns and rebuild trust in yourself, I'm here to support you. Reach out — I'd love to help you get your clarity and your life back. https://andreagiles.com/ More from me: Get Your Life Back After Infidelity Special: https://portal.andreagiles.com/offers/p5MWTwrk/checkout Please leave a rating and review if you like our podcast: https://ratethispodcast.com/healfrominfidelity Sign up for the $47 class "Decide: How to Commit to Staying or Going After Infidelity" here: https://portal.andreagiles.com/decide Apply to join the "Get Your Life Back After Infidelity" group program here: https://andreagiles.com/get-your-life-back/ Follow me on Instagram at: https://www.instagram.com/theinfidelitycoach/ Please click the button to subscribe so you don't miss any episodes! For transcripts and other available downloads, please visit my website at https://andreagiles.com/podcast/ © 2020 - 2025 Andrea Giles
This episode features guest hosts Dr. Scott Waltman and Kasey Pierce, authors of the forthcoming book The Rescuer Trap. Kasey breaks the silence with a six-word confession. She and Scott then explore the painful truth of codependency: when you jump into the quicksand of a partner's depression to save them, the inevitable result is sinking yourself.Are you the fixer, the over-giver, the emotional first responder for everyone but yourself? Welcome to The Rescuer Trap. We playfully own the labels “Parentified and Codependent” to make a point: these are not identities, but learned behaviors.And what can be learned can be unlearned. Hosts Dr. Scott Waltman and Kasey Pierce use Stoic philosophy and CBT to give you the tools to break the cycle and reclaim your autonomy. Your escape from the trap starts here. Based on the forthcoming book, The Rescuer Trap (New Harbinger).Thanks for reading Stoicism: Philosophy as a Way of Life! This post is public so feel free to share it. Get full access to Stoicism: Philosophy as a Way of Life at donaldrobertson.substack.com/subscribe
This episode features guest hosts Dr. Scott Waltman and Kasey Pierce, authors of the forthcoming book The Rescuer Trap. It's time to rejoin the pack, lone wolf, and bring your newfound healthy boundaries with you. Scott and Kasey unpack Maladaptive Overcorrection and how to find the middle path of flexibility and true, healthy Interdependence.Are you the fixer, the over-giver, the emotional first responder for everyone but yourself? Welcome to The Rescuer Trap. We playfully own the labels “Parentified and Codependent” to make a point: these are not identities, but learned behaviors.And what can be learned can be unlearned. Hosts Dr. Scott Waltman and Kasey Pierce use Stoic philosophy and CBT to give you the tools to break the cycle and reclaim your autonomy. Your escape from the trap starts here. Based on the forthcoming book, The Rescuer Trap (New Harbinger).Thanks for reading Stoicism: Philosophy as a Way of Life! This post is public so feel free to share it. Get full access to Stoicism: Philosophy as a Way of Life at donaldrobertson.substack.com/subscribe
Subscribe in a reader If you're divorcing a narcissist, you may be tempted to use your therapy records to prove PTSD or emotional abuse in court. But handing over those records can backfire in devastating ways. In this powerful conversation with Bree Bonchay—psychotherapist and founder of World Narcissistic Abuse Awareness Day—we break down the hidden […] The post Beyond Interaction: The Loneliness Epidemic & the Courage to Connect | Christina Wenman appeared first on Narcissist Abuse Support.
This episode features guest hosts Dr. Scott Waltman and Kasey Pierce, authors of the forthcoming book The Rescuer Trap. In this Sci-not-so-Fi episode, they talk about the dangers of emotional dependency on AI and Socrates asks “What is a boyfriend?” Are you the fixer, the over-giver, the emotional first responder for everyone but yourself? Welcome to The Rescuer Trap. We playfully own the labels “Parentified and Codependent” to make a point: these are not identities, but learned behaviors.And what can be learned can be unlearned. Hosts Dr. Scott Waltman and Kasey Pierce use Stoic philosophy and CBT to give you the tools to break the cycle and reclaim your autonomy. Your escape from the trap starts here. Based on the forthcoming book, The Rescuer Trap (New Harbinger).Thanks for reading Stoicism: Philosophy as a Way of Life! This post is public so feel free to share it. Get full access to Stoicism: Philosophy as a Way of Life at donaldrobertson.substack.com/subscribe
Part 2: We're going deep in this live Q&A — into that space between chaos and calm. If you've ever caught yourself saying, “Why do I keep going back?” or “How do I stop trying to save everyone but myself?” then this conversation is for you. We'll unpack what the survival instinct really is (and why it runs your relationships) so you can start rewiring that old codependent programming. Join us Monday at 7:30 PM EST as we explore God's solution so you can overcome and thrive! God has timeless truths to help you navigate life and live in freedom as He intended. Join us LIVE on Mondays at 7:30 PM ET where we answer your questions on how to Conquer Codependency God's Way. Do you have a question you would like Aliene to address? We've got you! Just leave your question in the comments below or email questions@treasuredministries.com Don't forget to like, subscribe, and leave a comment if this episode resonates with you! For more information/resources check out the links below: ⇨ Visit the Treasured Ministries Website: https://treasuredministries.com/ ⇨ Join the Treasured Tribe https://treasuredtribe.com/ ⇨ Sign up for our FREE newsletter and get inspiration for your faith journey https://treasuredministries.activehos... ⇨ Donate: https://treasuredministries.com/donate/ ⇨Sign up for retreat https://treasuredministries.com/retreat/ _____________________ Treasured Ministries provides discipleship, biblical resources, and community for women so they can exchange codependency for God dependency and thrive. For more information visit https://treasuredministries.com ______________________ Aliene Thompson is the president of Treasured Ministries International, the creator of the Nourish Bible Study Method, and the founder of the Treasured Tribe, an online Christian community for women. Her popular series on YouTube, "Conquering Codependency God's Way", helps women worldwide move from codependency to God dependency so they can live in freedom as God intended. #codependence #conqueringcodependency
This episode features guest hosts Dr. Scott Waltman and Kasey Pierce, authors of the forthcoming book The Rescuer Trap. Dr. Jeff Perron joins us to explore the deep-seated schemas (like Self-Sacrifice and Subjugation) that create the “Rescuer Trap.” We discuss how these unconscious, childhood-rooted patterns conflict with your adult values, and provide insight on using a schema-informed approach to establish boundaries and finally break free from the cycle of people-pleasing. Follow Dr. Perron on Substack: Are you the fixer, the over-giver, the emotional first responder for everyone but yourself? Welcome to The Rescuer Trap. We playfully own the labels “Parentified and Codependent” to make a point: these are not identities, but learned behaviors.And what can be learned can be unlearned. Hosts Dr. Scott Waltman and Kasey Pierce use Stoic philosophy and CBT to give you the tools to break the cycle and reclaim your autonomy. Your escape from the trap starts here. Based on the forthcoming book, The Rescuer Trap (New Harbinger).Thanks for reading Stoicism: Philosophy as a Way of Life! This post is public so feel free to share it. Get full access to Stoicism: Philosophy as a Way of Life at donaldrobertson.substack.com/subscribe
We're going deep in this live Q&A — into that space between chaos and calm. If you've ever caught yourself saying, “Why do I keep going back?” or “How do I stop trying to save everyone but myself?” then this conversation is for you. We'll unpack what the survival instinct really is (and why it runs your relationships) so you can start rewiring that old codependent programming. Join us Monday at 7:30 PM EST as we explore God's solution so you can overcome and thrive! God has timeless truths to help you navigate life and live in freedom as He intended. Join us LIVE on Mondays at 7:30 PM ET where we answer your questions on how to Conquer Codependency God's Way. Do you have a question you would like Aliene to address? We've got you! Just leave your question in the comments below or email questions@treasuredministries.com Don't forget to like, subscribe, and leave a comment if this episode resonates with you! For more information/resources check out the links below: ⇨ Visit the Treasured Ministries Website: https://treasuredministries.com/ ⇨ Join the Treasured Tribe https://treasuredtribe.com/ ⇨ Sign up for our FREE newsletter and get inspiration for your faith journey https://treasuredministries.activehos... ⇨ Donate: https://treasuredministries.com/donate/ ⇨Sign up for retreat https://treasuredministries.com/retreat/ _____________________ Treasured Ministries provides discipleship, biblical resources, and community for women so they can exchange codependency for God dependency and thrive. For more information visit https://treasuredministries.com ______________________ Aliene Thompson is the president of Treasured Ministries International, the creator of the Nourish Bible Study Method, and the founder of the Treasured Tribe, an online Christian community for women. Her popular series on YouTube, "Conquering Codependency God's Way", helps women worldwide move from codependency to God dependency so they can live in freedom as God intended. #codependence #conqueringcodependency
This episode features guest hosts Dr. Scott Waltman and Kasey Pierce, authors of the forthcoming book The Rescuer Trap. Strangers get weird on Scott when he attempts to exorcise their sadness with an old painting while Kasey runs away with the invisible idealized man... again. Are you the fixer, the over-giver, the emotional first responder for everyone but yourself? Welcome to The Rescuer Trap. We playfully own the labels “Parentified and Codependent” to make a point: these are not identities, but learned behaviors.And what can be learned can be unlearned. Hosts Dr. Scott Waltman and Kasey Pierce use Stoic philosophy and CBT to give you the tools to break the cycle and reclaim your autonomy. Your escape from the trap starts here. Based on the forthcoming book, The Rescuer Trap (New Harbinger).Thanks for reading Stoicism: Philosophy as a Way of Life! This post is public so feel free to share it. Get full access to Stoicism: Philosophy as a Way of Life at donaldrobertson.substack.com/subscribe
In this powerful episode, Lisa A. Romano, trauma-informed life coach and codependency recovery expert, dives deep into the often-overlooked role that anger plays in the healing journey from parental narcissism and complex trauma. Growing up in a dysfunctional family can leave emotional scars that are not easily seen, but they shape how we experience relationships and view ourselves as adults. In This Episode, You'll Learn: How denial serves as a survival strategy in dysfunctional family systems and how it can keep us stuck in toxic patterns The hidden anger that emerges from growing up with one narcissistic parent and another who was passive or emotionally absent Why it's common to feel guilt or confusion when recognizing anger toward a passive parent, even when they weren't overtly harmful How anger toward both parents can fuel the codependent behaviors and emotional dysregulation that often follow complex trauma The critical step of recognizing your anger as a valid emotion in the recovery process, and how it leads to clarity and healing Why This Matters When we grow up in a home where one parent's instability wreaks havoc, and the other's passivity leaves us emotionally unprotected, we internalize survival mechanisms like hyper-independence or helplessness. These patterns affect our ability to set healthy boundaries, build trust, and create meaningful connections later in life. Recognizing anger as part of the healing process is key. It isn't about blaming anyone, but rather about understanding how these dynamics shaped your sense of worth, your self-protection mechanisms, and your relationships today. Take the Next Step in Your Healing Journey Lisa's 12 Week Breakthrough Coaching Program helps you break free from codependency, complex trauma, and the long-lasting effects of narcissistic abuse. Through transformational lessons, journaling exercises, and neuroscience-based tools, this program will guide you toward emotional autonomy and inner peace. 12 Week Breakthrough Method: Start Today for 50% Off Learn More and Sign Up Here #CodependencyRecovery #NarcissisticAbuse #ComplexTrauma #ParentingTrauma #EmotionalNeglect #InnerChildHealing #TraumaRecovery #LisaRomano #BreakthroughHealing #HealingFromNarcissisticParents
This episode features guest hosts Dr. Scott Waltman and Kasey Pierce, authors of the forthcoming book The Rescuer Trap. Scott serves up a heapin' helping of downhome ‘parentification'. We're also talking about those labor=love moments that lead to leering at those couch-bound oxygen thieves, regretting that you never asked for help. Are you the fixer, the over-giver, the emotional first responder for everyone but yourself? Welcome to The Rescuer Trap. We playfully own the labels “Parentified and Codependent” to make a point: these are not identities, but learned behaviors.And what can be learned can be unlearned. Hosts Dr. Scott Waltman and Kasey Pierce use Stoic philosophy and CBT to give you the tools to break the cycle and reclaim your autonomy. Your escape from the trap starts here. Based on the forthcoming book, The Rescuer Trap (New Harbinger).Thanks for reading Stoicism: Philosophy as a Way of Life! This post is public so feel free to share it. Get full access to Stoicism: Philosophy as a Way of Life at donaldrobertson.substack.com/subscribe
In this episode of Live Unashamed, the hosts dive deep into the complexities of codependency and support in relationships. Josh shares his personal journey of recovery and the challenges he faced in understanding the balance between supporting his wife and being codependent. The conversation shifts to the guests discussing their own experiences and strategies for maintaining honesty and connection while avoiding the pitfalls of self-abandonment and manipulation. Key insights include the importance of self-awareness, honest communication, and understanding one's motivations in acts of support. The episode concludes with a call to viewers to share their thoughts and experiences on the subject.Make a donation and become an Outsider!Follow us on social media! Instagram, Facebook & TikTokSubscribe to our YouTubeCheck out our recommended resourcesWant to rep the message? Shop our MERCH! For more inspiration, read our blogDo you have a story you are willing to share? Send us an email! contact@unashamedunafraid.com 00:00 Introduction to Unashamed Live01:00 Discussing Codependency in Relationships02:49 Navigating Support and Codependence06:43 Personal Stories and Reflections08:33 Understanding Self-Abandonment16:01 Final Thoughts and Takeaways16:39 Closing Remarks and Contact Information
This episode features guest hosts Dr. Scott Waltman and Kasey Pierce, authors of the forthcoming book The Rescuer Trap. Scott and Kasey discuss the trouble with mistaking preferences for values. Also, why we can't use sacrificing our values as a bargaining chip, call it a forced wager, and blame the house for our “lost investment” when the relationship goes bust. Are you the fixer, the over-giver, the emotional first responder for everyone but yourself? Welcome to The Rescuer Trap. We playfully own the labels “Parentified and Codependent” to make a point: these are not identities, but learned behaviors.And what can be learned can be unlearned. Hosts Dr. Scott Waltman and Kasey Pierce use Stoic philosophy and CBT to give you the tools to break the cycle and reclaim your autonomy. Your escape from the trap starts here. Based on the forthcoming book, The Rescuer Trap (New Harbinger).Thanks for reading Stoicism: Philosophy as a Way of Life! This post is public so feel free to share it. Get full access to Stoicism: Philosophy as a Way of Life at donaldrobertson.substack.com/subscribe
Have you ever caught yourself thinking, “I'm codependent on my kids”—and then immediately felt ashamed for it? You're not alone. So many moms in the empty nest or parenting teens phase feel that tug between love and letting go. For years, we've been wired to sense our kids' needs—to comfort, fix, and protect. That instinct doesn't just disappear when they grow up. But sometimes our care turns into worry, overthinking, or trying to manage what we can't control. Not because we're needy, but because we're afraid—afraid they'll suffer, or that we'll lose our connection or sense of purpose if they don't need us the same way anymore. In this episode I'll share why this reaction makes perfect sense and what science says about how motherhood literally wires us to feel our kids' emotions as if they're our own. Join me to challenge this concept of codependency and understand what's really at the root of your emotional ups and downs as a mom.
Are you constantly exhausted at work or in a system that seems to drain you more than it feeds you? This episode explores: · The energetic blueprint of codependent systems · How to recognize the spiritual warfare behind institutional control · The signs that your burnout isn't personal — it's systemic · Tools to start disentangling from dependency without destroying your peace It's time to reclaim your light. It's time to choose your power. Subscribe to ShelbyRADIO for weekly spiritual insights
When Innocence Feels Like Rejection: How Codependent Mothers Misread Their Children What happens when a child's innocent comment gets filtered through the lens of an unhealthy, codependent mom versus a healthy, emotionally attuned mom? The difference can shape not only the child's self-worth but also the generational cycle of codependency. In this episode, Lisa A. Romano, Breakthrough Life Coach and bestselling author, unpacks how unhealed wounds distort a mother's perception of her child's needs and words. An emotionally unhealthy mother, trapped in her own unresolved pain, may perceive an innocent statement like “I wish I could play with you more” as a personal attack—triggering shame, defensiveness, or withdrawal. A healthy mother, however, sees the same comment for what it is: a child's bid for love and connection. This powerful contrast reveals why addressing codependency is not just self-work—it's generational work. If left unchecked, codependency programs children to feel responsible for others' feelings, abandon their own needs, and repeat the same painful patterns in adulthood. Lisa shows you how to break the cycle by teaching: Why codependent programming distorts reality and causes misinterpretation of innocent words. The neuroscience behind why trauma survivors often personalize others' emotions. How healthy mothers validate their child's truth without collapsing into shame or defensiveness. Why breaking free from codependency is the single most important gift you can pass to your children. This episode is a must-listen if you: Grew up with a parent who made you feel guilty for your feelings. Struggle with people-pleasing or fearing rejection. Want to stop codependency from spilling into your parenting or relationships. Are ready to see how your healing ripples into future generations. ✨ Pro tip: Awareness is the first step. When you learn to recognize these patterns, you reclaim your ability to create healthy connections and stop carrying wounds that were never yours to bear. Begin Your Healing Journey: Lisa introduces her signature 12 Week Breakthrough Method—a trauma-informed, neuroscience-based coaching program designed for adult children of narcissistic, neglectful, or emotionally immature parents. Inside the program, you'll discover: Brain retraining techniques rooted in neuroscience. Inner child healing and self-concept reorganization. Journaling prompts and assessments to increase self-awareness. Tools to stop subconscious self-abandonment and live authentically. How to integrate shadow work and break toxic generational patterns. Thousands have transformed their lives with this method—learning to step out of survival mode and into authentic, empowered living.
Borderline Induced Conversations - When Talking Turns Into Trauma for CodependentsWhen you try to talk to someone with Borderline Personality Disorder and the conversation suddenly turns emotional, chaotic, or painful — you're not communicating. You're in an induced conversation.In this episode, A.J. Mahari explains how Borderlines and Codependents unconsciously pull each other into trauma-based emotional loops that feel like connection but are actually dysregulation. You'll learn what's really happening in your nervous system, why you keep getting drawn back in, and how to finally step out of these trauma-bonded “talks” that never resolve anything and never bring peace.In this podcast episode:What an induced conversation really isHow Borderlines project pain and Codependents absorb itThe nervous-system collision behind emotional chaosWhy calm feels unsafe after traumaHow to end the cycle and reclaim your peacehttps://ajmahari.ca/sessions - Sessionshttps://ajmahari.ca/podcasts - Podcastshttps://ajmahari.com - Online Store new Course Modules coming soonhttps://survivingbpdrelationshipbreakup.com - This podcast and my YoutubeThis podcast is ranked in the Top 100 Relationships Podcasts on feedspot.com at:100 Best Relationship Podcasts You Must Follow in 2025Million Podcasts has ranked this podcast in the top 60 Codependency Podcasts,the top 100 Narcissistic Abuse Podcasts and the top 100 in their Toxic RelationshipPodcast lists.https://www.millionpodcasts.com/codependency-podcasts/https://www.millionpodcasts.com/narcissistic-abuse-podcasts/https://www.millionpodcasts.com/toxic-relationship-podcasts/
Borderline Love a Looping Trap of DeceptionBorderline Love is a looping trap of deception rooted in fantasy, betrayal, false hope, and trauma bonded dynamics of pseudo attachment and the Borderline idealization trap of deception (conscious or unconscious). People with BPD deceive boyfriends and girlfriends, husbands and wives, the favorite person, friends and family members as well as themselves.People with Borderline Personality do not know who they are. They do not know how to relate to you as separate from their own internal dysregulated and emotionally immature "lack of self". "Love and/or attachment" believed to be given by a person with BPD or received by a Codependent is an emotional deception and a trap.https://ajmahari.ca - Sessions - Contact - Bloghttps://ajmahari.ca/podcasts - A.J's Podcastshttps://ajmahari.com - Online Store - Ebooks & morehttps://survivingbpdrelationshipbreakup.com - Podcast & Youtube FeedThis podcast is ranked in the Top 100 Relationships Podcasts on feedspot.com at:100 Best Relationship Podcasts You Must Follow in 2025Million Podcasts has ranked this podcast in the top 60 Codependency Podcasts,the top 100 Narcissistic Abuse Podcasts and the top 100 in their Toxic RelationshipPodcast lists.https://www.millionpodcasts.com/codependency-podcasts/https://www.millionpodcasts.com/narcissistic-abuse-podcasts/https://www.millionpodcasts.com/toxic-relationship-podcasts/
This episode features guest hosts Dr. Scott Waltman and Kasey Pierce, authors of the forthcoming book The Rescuer Trap. Scott and Kasey discuss the forthcoming virtual event for Plato's Academy Centre and its featured speakers. They also talk values chameleons: taking on the shade of your partner to ensure the survival of the relationship. Stoicism: Philosophy as a Way of Life is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber.Are you the fixer, the over-giver, the emotional first responder for everyone but yourself? Welcome to The Rescuer Trap. We playfully own the labels “Parentified and Codependent” to make a point: these are not identities, but learned behaviors.And what can be learned can be unlearned. Hosts Dr. Scott Waltman and Kasey Pierce use Stoic philosophy and CBT to give you the tools to break the cycle and reclaim your autonomy. Your escape from the trap starts here. Based on the forthcoming book, The Rescuer Trap (New Harbinger).Thanks for reading Stoicism: Philosophy as a Way of Life! This post is public so feel free to share it. Get full access to Stoicism: Philosophy as a Way of Life at donaldrobertson.substack.com/subscribe
The Truth About Empaths, Childhood Trauma, and Shadow Work Are empaths born—or made? In this eye-opening episode, Lisa A. Romano, Breakthrough Life Coach and bestselling author, explores the origin of empathic sensitivity and its powerful connection to childhood trauma, emotional wounding, and spiritual purpose. Some empaths are created through painful early experiences—rejection, abandonment, emotional neglect, and feeling unseen. These wounds condition the developing brain into hypervigilance, keeping the child's psyche locked in "scanning mode." When a child is forced to tune into the emotions and behavior of others to feel safe, they become disconnected from their true self—and this is the breeding ground for codependency. Other empaths are born, arriving with a spiritual assignment. Their nervous systems and emotional bodies are designed to feel what others suppress. Often, these empathic souls absorb the denied pain of their caregivers—especially unhealed maternal figures. Over time, these empaths become sensitive not just to individual pain, but to the collective suffering that society ignores. But without proper tools, empaths can become emotionally capsized, overwhelmed by the very gift they were meant to use consciously. That's why Lisa teaches empaths how to use symbols, metaphors, and boundaries to reframe their experience, and to reclaim the connection to self that trauma stole. This episode is a must-listen for anyone who: Feels deeply affected by other people's moods and energies Grew up walking on emotional eggshells Struggles with codependency, people-pleasing, or emotional burnout Wants to understand the true purpose behind their empathic gifts You'll also learn why many empaths feel called to “fix” or “rescue” others—and why this often stems from unresolved inner child wounds, not divine purpose. Healing begins when we stop absorbing and start integrating. Lisa shares why true transformation for empaths lies in shadow work, conscious integration, and elevating the nervous system. Those brave enough to face their own shadows don't just heal themselves—they become vessels for generational healing. ✨ Pro tip: You may want to listen to this episode more than once. It's packed with golden nuggets that could change your life. Begin Your Healing Journey: Lisa introduces her signature 12 Week Breakthrough Method—a trauma-informed, neuroscience-based coaching program created specifically for adult children of narcissistic, neglectful, or emotionally immature caregivers. Inside the program, you'll be guided through: Brain retraining techniques rooted in neuroscience Inner child healing and self-concept reorganization Neuroscience Backed Journaling prompts and assessments to increase self-awareness Tools to stop subconscious self-abandonment and start living from your true self Embrace shadow work from a higher state of consciousness to experience integration This method has helped thousands heal from complex trauma and break toxic generational patterns, with tools to rewire limiting beliefs and build authentic self-worth.
What really happens when you leave a narcissist? Whether you're stepping away for a few days or ending the relationship for good, the consequences can be life-changing — and often overwhelming.In this video, I explain:* The difference between a narcissist and a falsely empowered codependent (many people confuse the two).* What you'll experience when you leave temporarily vs permanently.* How narcissists use anger, abandonment wounds, and manipulation when you separate.* The dangers of parental alienation if children are involved.* Why trying to “fix” a narcissist always backfires.* How to protect yourself emotionally, financially, and legally when leaving.
Subscribe in a reader A Novel About Narcissistic Abuse: In today's interview, I'm talking with my friend Arielle Ford about her powerful new book, The Love Thief—a spiritual novel that explores narcissistic abuse, betrayal, karma, and emotional healing in a way that's both entertaining and deeply validating. When I read the manuscript of The Love […] The post A Spiritual Novel About Narcissistic Abuse & Revenge: The Love Thief with Arielle Ford appeared first on Narcissist Abuse Support.
Do you have a "graveyard of broken relationships" because you confront people who hurt you? In this video, Ross Rosenberg introduces the latest addition to his list of codependency personality types: the Abandonment-Sensitive Codependent (or Self-Love Deficient individual). These individuals are highly reactive to perceived abandonment, often confronting the pathological narcissists they are magnetically attracted to, which leads to repeated relationship ruptures. In the video, Ross explains how this creates a self-fulfilling prophecy of loneliness and how it differs from healthier responses or personality disorders like BPD. If you see yourself in this pattern, learn how healing the core wounds of Self-Love Deficit Disorder can help you break the cycle and find peace.Learn more about Self-Love Recovery Treatment at my website: www.SelfLoveRecovery.com#Codependency #SelfLoveDeficitDisorder #AbandonmentIssues #HumanMagnetSyndrome #MentalHealth #RossRosenberg #NarcissisticAbuse #RelationshipAdvice
What happens when the very people who were supposed to love us, protect us, and cherish us turn out to be the source of our deepest pain? In this revealing episode, Lisa A. Romano, trauma-informed life coach and codependency recovery expert, explores the heartbreaking reality behind why so many children grow up loving the very people who harmed them—and how this sets the stage for adult codependency. From narcissistic parents to emotionally neglectful caregivers, this episode dives into the psychology behind trauma bonding, betrayal blindness, and why our subconscious minds cling to toxic dynamics. Lisa unpacks the emotional and neurological imprinting that causes children—and later, adults—to overlook red flags and remain loyal to harmful people. In this episode, you'll discover:
You weren't born nice. You were trained. By mothers who were trained. By systems that still benefit from your silence. In this episode, you'll hear a casual girlfriend chat with Lesa Koski where we unearth the origins of our people-pleasing, the masks we wear to feel safe, and the slow-burning bravery it takes to start telling the truth. Lesa and I unmask our Good Girls, and give you practical strategies so you can do it too. Because underneath the mask of the Good Girl is a Queen ready to rise. Lesa Koski is a wife, mother, grandmother, mediator, coach, and host of the Saddle Up Live podcast. Her journey has been anything but ordinary, but every twist and turn has brought her to a place where she now helps others live their best lives. Connect with Lesa here Get your copy of my book, The Selfish Year Take my free quiz to reveal the mask you've been hiding behind
Subscribe in a reader Narcissist abuse can leave you feeling lost, invisible, and unsure of who you truly are. In this video, I share how I began to find myself after abuse — step by step, belief by belief. As someone who was raised by narcissistic parents, married a narcissist, and later saw these patterns […] The post Find Yourself After Abuse: Reclaiming My Identity From Narcissistic Control appeared first on Narcissist Abuse Support.
Why do we cling to people who hurt us? Why does the fear of abandonment feel so unbearable? In this episode, Lisa A. Romano, expert in trauma recovery and codependency healing, unpacks the powerful link between attachment theory and codependency. From early childhood dynamics to the subconscious fears that drive our adult relationships, Lisa breaks down how insecure attachment styles—like anxious or avoidant—set the stage for emotional dependency, people-pleasing, and self-abandonment. If you've ever felt like you're addicted to love, overly responsible for others, or terrified of being alone, this episode will help you trace those patterns back to their origin—so you can begin to heal them. In this episode, you'll learn: What attachment theory is—and how it relates to codependency How unmet childhood needs create fear-based attachment styles Why codependents often attract emotionally unavailable partners How anxious attachment leads to over-functioning in relationships Steps to begin forming healthier, more secure connections This episode is for you if you: ✔️ Fear abandonment or rejection in relationships ✔️ Struggle to speak your truth or set healthy boundaries ✔️ Feel responsible for other people's emotions ✔️ Tend to give more than you receive in friendships or love Resources Mentioned:
Subscribe in a reader If you’re trying to find yourself after abuse by a narcissist, this conversation with Johanna Lynn is exactly what you need. We talk about healing, rebuilding trust, and finally feeling whole again. In this episode, Johanna and I dive deep into what it means to untangle yourself from a narcissist […] The post How to Find Yourself After Abuse by a Narcissist | Healing with Johanna Lynn appeared first on Narcissist Abuse Support.
This is a theme that we have been wanting to explore on the podcast for months, but have been dragging our feet. (Perhaps because we both identify closely with this ...
Borderline personality disorder can be understood as the extreme version of codependency, where, at the core are adult adult children who have suffered from abandonment, rejection, abuse, neglect, and trauma. When an innocent child is unable, through no fault of their own, to connect with their primary caregiver, and especially when that caregiver is actually a source of pain, suffering and instability, the brain of that child is forced to live from the plane of survival. Due to default settings of the personality, brain and nervous system, for the one who has been denied a healthy attachment and who at the same time, also learned that they could not and should not trust the one caring for them, the inner world becomes trapped below the veil of consciousness, living in fear of the love the being so desperately craves. How Narcissistic Parents Contribute to Borderline Personality Development Children of narcissistic parents often grow up in environments marked by emotional unpredictability. One moment, the parent may be intrusive, critical, or controlling, and the next they may be cold, withdrawn, or dismissive. This creates a push-pull dynamic where the child never feels secure. Over time, this instability fragments the child's developing sense of self. Because their emotional needs are dismissed or punished, the child learns to fear abandonment while simultaneously fearing engulfment. They internalize the belief that love is unstable, unsafe, and conditional. As adults, this unresolved conflict can manifest as borderline traits: Intense fear of abandonment Unstable self-image Difficulty regulating emotions Stormy, chaotic relationships These symptoms are not “character flaws” but survival adaptations to a childhood where the parent's narcissism left no room for stable, secure attachment. How Narcissistic Parents Create Codependency While borderline traits stem from instability, codependency develops from self-abandonment. In a narcissistic home, children quickly learn that their parent's approval, affection, or even basic safety hinges on meeting the parent's emotional needs. The child becomes hypervigilant, scanning the parent for shifts in mood, anticipating outbursts, and adapting themselves to keep the peace. This conditioning teaches the child: “My needs don't matter.” “I must earn love by taking care of others.” “If I say no, I'll lose connection.” As adults, these children often: Over-function in relationships Prioritize others' needs above their own Struggle to set boundaries without guilt Confuse love with caretaking or control This is the essence of codependency: a pattern of chronic self-abandonment rooted in early survival strategies. ✅ Bottom line: Both borderline personality traits and codependency share the same root wound — a lack of secure, validating parental love. One path (borderline) reflects the inner chaos of unstable attachment, while the other (codependency) reflects the learned habit of self-erasure for connection. Both are survival strategies that can be unlearned through conscious healing, reparenting, and building self-trust. Ready to breakthrough these subconscious patterns? Start here with The 12 Week Breakthrough Method #borderlinepersonality #childhoodtraumarecoverypodcast #codependencyrecovery #innerchildhealing #mentalhealthpodcast #lisaaromanopodcast #narcissisticmother #narcissisticparents #selfawareness #selfdevelopment #healingjourney #awakening #higherself #consciousness
Juli & Caleb's meal train: https://mealtrain.com/mld5k9Want to support what we do? Give today! https://donate.overflow.co/upsettheworld/__________________________________________________________________Come to the Whole Woman Co. x UTW x Register here to stream our free experience:https://brushfire.com/wholewomanco/utwwwco/603899/register?fbclid=PAZXh0bgNhZW0CMTEAAae0sDOlAxlB6WupP9x90p6nkoQXeiaCsWeE7trNUZdGIEV3BAPmlaAl67C3-g_aem_Gk6K-ItEKoK4Bt-SRO5Hog__________________________________________________________________Members get Episodes 2 Days early, vlogs, & exclusive STREAMS! Join today! UPSET & ABOVE to unlock all the perks!https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCqzgGwRrOLH20OIc8bM_VAg/join__________________________________________________________________
Subscribe in a reader Check out my product recommendations for Narcissist Abuse Survivors! – https://www.amazon.com/shop/tracymalone *As an Amazon Associate I earn from qualifying purchases. Listen to my podcasts anytime by subscribing with your favorite provider! The post How to Take Back Control When Divorcing a Narcissist | Denise Kavaliauskas appeared first on Narcissist Abuse Support.
Have an episode suggestion? Text us!In this episode of Paige's Perspective, I'm breaking down the truth about betrayal trauma — and why it's so much more than cheating. From financial betrayal to chronic lies, gaslighting, broken promises, and crossed boundaries, betrayal in a relationship takes many forms and leaves deep wounds. Too often, betrayed partners get slapped with the “codependent” label, which shifts blame away from the person who caused the harm and piles shame on someone already hurting. I'll share real-life examples, explain how betrayal trauma impacts your brain and body, and talk about how the recovery world needs to shift its focus from pathologizing survival instincts to supporting real healing.Find video clips and full length video from this episode on YouTube and our other social media pages!On the web:www.twfo.comSupport the Show:Buy Us a Coffee!Online Course: www.independentlystrong.comUse code WHEELIES75 for 75% off the entire course!Soberlink Device:www.soberlink.com/wheelsCheck out our blog:https://twfo.com/blogFollow us on TikTok:https://tiktok.com/@twfo_coupleFollow us on Instagram:https://instagram.com/twfo_couple/Follow us on Facebook:https://www.facebook.com/TWFOCoupleFollow us on YouTube:https://www.youtube.com/@twfo_coupleFind Taylor Counseling Group:https://taylorcounselinggroup.com/Donate to Counseling for the Future Foundation:Donate Here
Welcome to the Daily Disciple Podcast. As daily disciples, we seek to adore and follow Jesus, our teacher, into the abundant life that he offers. Because we find Jesus irresistible, fascinating, and incredibly practical, we want to be students of his scripture. Today's episode is found in Mark 1.
Codependent? No more! As I've been learning about my own codependent tendencies, I've started noticing all the ways they show up in the culture and doctrine of high-demand religions. In this episode, we'll cover Codependency 101, I'll share my journey of recognizing those patterns in family, friendships, and marriage—and how I'm working to shift them. Then we'll dive into how Mormonism (and other high-demand religions) can supercharge those dynamics. LFG! Melody Beattie's “Codependent No More” Dr. Julie Hanks on patriarchal cultures and enmeshment Join the Girlscamp: After Dark Patreon account here. For more Girlscamp content follow along on Instagram, TikTok and YouTube. For ad inquiries please email girlscamppodcast@gmail.com. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Subscribe in a reader Check out my product recommendations for Narcissist Abuse Survivors! – https://www.amazon.com/shop/tracymalone *As an Amazon Associate I earn from qualifying purchases. Listen to my podcasts anytime by subscribing with your favorite provider! The post How to Date Without Repeating the Past: Starting Over After Narcissistic Abuse | Dawn Smith appeared first on Narcissist Abuse Support.
In this powerful episode, Lisa A. Romano explores how codependency erodes authenticity and keeps people trapped in the exhausting cycle of people-pleasing. If you struggle to speak your truth, constantly seek approval, or fear setting boundaries, this episode will help you understand the deeper root of why you hide your authentic self—and how to begin unmasking the people pleaser within. In This Episode, You'll Learn: Why people-pleasing is a trauma response rooted in childhood survival How codependency develops when authenticity is punished or ignored The difference between genuine kindness and compulsive approval-seeking Why suppressing your needs leads to resentment, burnout, and emotional confusion Practical steps to reconnect with your true self and honor your voice Why This Episode Matters Many adult children of emotionally immature, narcissistic, or unavailable caregivers learn early on that being “the good one” is the only way to feel safe. Over time, this coping mechanism becomes a false self—one that performs for acceptance while abandoning its truth. But healing is possible. By understanding the connection between childhood emotional neglect and adult codependency, you can begin the courageous journey back to your authentic self—one boundary at a time. Take the Next Step Lisa's 12 Week Breakthrough Method is a neuroscience-informed system designed to help you unlearn codependent behaviors, reclaim your voice, and build a self-concept rooted in worth and truth. Learn more: https://www.lisaaromano.com/12-wbcp #CodependencyRecovery #PeoplePleasing #AuthenticSelf #ChildhoodTrauma #InnerChildHealing #EmotionalNeglect #SpeakYourTruth #BoundariesMatter #HealingJourney #LisaRomano
If you grew up feeling emotionally unsafe, unseen, or like your feelings didn't matter, you may have unknowingly developed codependent behaviors rooted in childhood emotional neglect. In this powerful episode, Lisa A. Romano, codependency recovery expert, breaks down how early life experiences shape your nervous system and self-worth—and why the "invisible child" often becomes an adult trapped in patterns of people-pleasing, self-abandonment, and toxic relationship cycles. In This Episode, You'll Learn: How childhood trauma, emotional instability, or neglect programs the brain for codependency Why feeling unsafe as a child rewires your nervous system to seek external validation How beliefs like “I'm not enough” become subconscious blocks to self-esteem The hidden link between early emotional trauma and compulsive rescuing or caretaking How to start reclaiming emotional safety through boundaries, self-awareness, and nervous system regulation Why This Episode Matters Codependency is not just about behavior—it's about the emotional blueprint you were given as a child. If no one ever mirrored your worth or made space for your needs, you may now unconsciously look to others for permission to feel safe, lovable, or whole. But healing begins with visibility—recognizing your patterns and rewiring the beliefs that keep you stuck. Take Action: Journal Prompt: When was the first time you felt emotionally unsafe or invisible? How is that experience still influencing your relationships today? Self-Awareness Practice: Next time you feel the urge to fix or please someone, ask yourself: “Is this about honoring me—or avoiding rejection?” Continue the Journey: Discover Lisa's neuroscience-based system for codependency recovery in the
Today, I'm talking about one of my absolute favorite topics…codependency. I've lived this, I've healed from it, and today I'm sharing my personal story of what that journey looked like for me. This conversation was inspired by a thoughtful question from one of our listeners who asked how to handle the hurt and pain that can come from our own codependent behaviors in relationships. Together, we explore what codependency really is, how it often shows up unconsciously, and why it can be so manipulative without us even realizing it. I'll walk you through five practical steps to begin healing from codependency, including self-awareness, taking ownership, finding your truth, practicing self-care, and setting healthy boundaries. In this episode, you'll hear: My personal journey with codependency and how I moved through it Why codependency is often unconscious and can feel manipulative Five practical steps to heal from codependency and create healthy change How self-care and boundaries are essential for true healing Resources from this Episode: The Adult Chair book is NOW AVAILABLE! MORE MICHELLE CHALFANT Website: https://www.michellechalfant.com Membership: The Academy of Awakening https://www.theacademyofawakening.com Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/themichellechalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheMichelleChalfant The Adult Chair® Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/Michellechalfant