Healing Starts with the Heart

Episode Description "Sometimes the hardest goodbye isn't to a person. It's to the life you built." In this episode of Grieve That Sh!t, Sharon Brubaker, grief specialist and founder of The Grief School, sits down with senior transition specialist Felicia Tausig for an eye-opening conversation about one of the most overlooked forms of grief: leaving the home you've built a lifetime of memories in. When we think about grief, we often think about death. But grief also shows up when life changes. When it's time to downsize. When a diagnosis changes the future. When a spouse is no longer there. When the family home no longer fits the next season of life. Together, Sharon and Felicia explore the emotional side of downsizing, why seniors often struggle to let go of possessions, and how every room, photograph, and keepsake tells a story worth honoring. They also discuss how adult children can better support their parents through these transitions, why patience matters, and how memories don't live inside our belongings. They live inside us. This episode is a powerful reminder that letting go of a house doesn't mean letting go of a life. Because home isn't just a place. It's the love, memories, and relationships you carry with you. What You'll Learn in This Episode Why downsizing can be a profound grieving experience The emotional attachment seniors have to their homes and belongings How adult children can support parents through major life transitions Why every keepsake tells a story Practical ways to honor memories without keeping every possession How grief shows up during retirement, aging, and changing seasons of life Why patience and compassion matter during transitions How creating new routines helps ease the emotional adjustment Questions to Sit With After Listening What memories am I holding onto through my possessions? How can I honor my past while embracing my next chapter? Am I giving myself or my loved one permission to grieve this transition? What does "home" truly mean to me? Homework for You Choose one meaningful item in your home. Take a photo of it. Write down the story behind it and why it matters to you. Then ask yourself: "Is it the object I'm holding onto... or the memory?" Because memories don't disappear when things do. They continue to live in the stories we tell and the people we share them with. Resources + Next Steps

Episode Description "Healing doesn't mean you stop loving them. It means love becomes louder than the pain." In this episode of Grieve That Sh!t, Sharon Brubaker, grief specialist and founder of The Grief School, sits down with Becky for a deeply honest conversation about losing her 23-year-old son, Ashton, and the complicated layers of grief that followed. Together, they explore not only the heartbreak of child loss, but also the hidden losses that often go unseen and unspoken. Becky shares what life looked like before grief, the overwhelming regret and "what ifs" that consumed her after her son's death, and how she believed she would spend the rest of her life trapped in unbearable pain. Through her journey, she discovered that grief doesn't have to define the rest of your story. Together, Sharon and Becky discuss the importance of grieving every loss, the healing that comes from processing grief instead of avoiding it, and how combining grief work with therapy gave Becky the tools to begin living again. They also explore parenting through grief, the role of community, survivor's guilt, regrets, and why healing doesn't erase love—it allows love to shine through once more. This episode is a powerful reminder that grief may change you forever. But it doesn't have to leave you stuck forever. Because healing doesn't ask you to let go of the person you love. It teaches you how to carry them with you as you continue to live. What You'll Learn in This Episode Why grief often includes hidden losses we don't recognize at first How regret and "what if" thinking can keep us feeling stuck The unique challenges of grieving a child Why grief work and therapy can complement one another The difference between surviving grief and truly healing How unprocessed grief affects every part of your life Why support groups, therapy, and grief education each serve different purposes How healing allows joyful memories to return without diminishing love Why investing in your healing benefits everyone around you Questions to Sit With After Listening What regrets have I been carrying that need compassion instead of punishment? Am I surviving my grief, or am I actively working through it? What hidden losses have I never given myself permission to grieve? What would healing make possible in my relationships and daily life? Homework for You Take a few quiet moments today and write down one regret you've been carrying. Then ask yourself: "What would I say to someone I love if they carried this same regret?" Offer yourself that same compassion. Healing begins when we stop punishing ourselves for being human. Because love was never meant to be measured by pain. It's meant to be carried forward. Resources + Next Steps

Episode Description "You don't have to have all the answers to begin healing." In this episode of Grieve That Sh!t, Sharon Brubaker, grief specialist and founder of The Grief School, sits down with therapist and grieving mother Joanna Martinez Dunn for an honest conversation about losing a child, navigating unimaginable grief, and finding hope after life's deepest heartbreak. After experiencing profound loss within her family in a matter of weeks, Joanna found herself facing overwhelming grief, unanswered questions, survivor's guilt, and the difficult journey of learning how to move forward one day at a time. Together, Sharon and Joanna explore the unique challenges of grieving a child, the relentless search for answers, the emotional and physical impact of grief, and why healing begins when we stop trying to explain what cannot always be understood. They also discuss parenting through grief, the role of faith and community, the importance of asking for help, and how honoring the people we love allows us to carry them forward with us. This episode is a powerful reminder that healing doesn't require having every answer. It simply asks you to keep showing up. Because healing doesn't happen by forgetting. It happens by learning how to carry love forward. What You'll Learn in This Episode The unique challenges of grieving the loss of a child Why survivor's guilt can feel so overwhelming How grief affects the mind, body, and nervous system The difference between surviving and truly healing Why unanswered questions don't have to stop your healing How faith and community can provide support through grief Why asking for help is one of the bravest things you can do The importance of speaking your loved one's name and honoring their memory How healing can eventually lead to purpose and hope Questions to Sit With After Listening What questions have I been carrying that may never have an answer? Am I allowing myself to experience my grief, or am I trying to outrun it? Who can I reach out to when my grief feels too heavy to carry alone? How can I honor the person I love while continuing to move forward? Homework for You Take a few quiet moments today and write down the name of the person you're grieving. Then write: One memory that makes you smile. One lesson they taught you. One way you can carry their love forward this week. Because love doesn't end when someone's life does. It continues in the way we choose to remember, honor, and live. Resources + Next Steps

Episode Description "You don't need more time. You need a plan." In this episode of Grieve That Sh!t, Sharon Brubaker, grief specialist and founder of The Grief School, challenges one of the biggest lies grieving people have been told: "Just give it time." Time doesn't heal grief. It simply creates space. What you do with that space is what changes everything. Sharon explains why so many grievers stay stuck for years—not because they're broken, but because no one ever taught them how to grieve. We learn how to survive loss, but not how to process it. In this episode, Sharon shares the difference between surviving and healing, why grief needs structure instead of avoidance, and how unprocessed pain continues to affect your relationships, your body, your emotions, and your daily life. She also walks through the three phases of grief healing, the purpose behind The Grief School, and why grief isn't something you're meant to carry alone. Because grief changes your life. But it doesn't have to define the rest of it. What You'll Learn in This Episode Why time alone doesn't heal grief The difference between surviving and processing grief Why so many grievers feel stuck for years How grief affects the mind, body, and nervous system Why avoiding grief keeps the pain alive The three phases of grief healing What it means to move through grief with intention Why healing begins with structure, not just support Questions to Sit With After Listening Am I surviving my grief or actively healing it? What have I been waiting for time to fix? What parts of my grief have I been avoiding? What would change if I had a clear plan for my healing? Homework for You Take out a journal and answer this question: "What is my current plan for healing?" If your answer is simply "I'm waiting for time," ask yourself: "What if time isn't the plan?" Write down one action you can take this week to begin processing your grief instead of simply surviving it. Because healing begins with one intentional step. Resources + Next Steps

Episode Description "Grief changes your life. Healing changes the way you live it." In this episode of Grieve That Sh!t, Sharon Brubaker, grief specialist and founder of The Grief School, sits down with Suzanne to share a deeply personal conversation about devastating loss, healing, and what happens when you finally begin doing the work grief has been asking of you. Suzanne has experienced the deaths of her parents, siblings, nephew, niece, partner, and many other significant losses throughout her life. Like so many grievers, she believed time would somehow make the pain easier. Instead, she found herself surviving behind walls she didn't even realize she had built. Everything changed when she began processing her grief one relationship at a time. Together, Sharon and Suzanne talk about brain fog, the overwhelming weight of loss, the pressure society places on grieving people, and why grief is never something you simply "get over." They also explore the unique pain of losing a parent, the loneliness that comes when your family is gone, and how grief work transformed not only Suzanne's healing, but also inspired her to become a Certified Grief Specialist so she could help others find hope. This episode is a powerful reminder that grief changes you. But healing changes you, too. Because grief may become part of your story. It does not have to become your identity. What You'll Learn in This Episode Why time alone doesn't heal grief What brain fog and grief overwhelm really feel like The hidden weight of carrying multiple losses Why unprocessed grief builds over time The unique grief of losing parents, siblings, and a life partner How grief work changes the way you experience future losses Why community is essential during healing The difference between surviving grief and living again How grief can inspire purpose and service to others Why healing is possible, no matter how long you've been grieving Questions to Sit With After Listening What parts of my grief have I been carrying alone? Have I mistaken surviving for healing? What walls have I built to protect myself? What would it look like to take one small step toward healing today? Homework for You Take a piece of paper and write down every significant loss you've experienced, not just the deaths. As you look at the list, ask yourself: "Which of these losses have I truly allowed myself to grieve?" You don't have to heal everything today. You only have to be willing to begin. Resources + Next Steps

"It's okay to be a griever." In this episode of Grieve That Sh!t, Sharon Brubaker, grief specialist and founder of The Grief School, sits down with Monette Hopkins, a graduate of Forever Changed and Processing the Pain of Grief, to share an honest conversation about what healing can look like after unimaginable loss. Monette has experienced the deaths of her husband, three children, and several other loved ones. When she first met Sharon, the weight of her grief was so overwhelming that she could barely speak in complete sentences. Today, she shares how grief work helped her find hope, peace, laughter, and the courage to keep living. Together, Sharon and Monette talk about the power of brain dumps, why healing takes time, the importance of boundaries, and how telling the truth about your grief can change everything. This episode is a beautiful reminder that healing doesn't mean forgetting the people you love. It means learning how to carry their love without carrying the unbearable weight of unprocessed grief. Because no matter how deep your pain feels... There is still hope. What You'll Learn in This Episode Why it's okay to be a griever How brain dumps help process overwhelming emotions Why grief healing looks different for everyone The importance of honesty during the healing process How boundaries support emotional healing Why laughter can exist alongside grief How community helps us heal What happens when you finally begin processing years of unresolved pain Questions to Sit With After Listening What have I been carrying that I've never put into words? Am I giving myself permission to grieve honestly? Who has been walking alongside me in my grief? What would it look like to tell the truth about my pain? Homework for You Take a journal and spend ten minutes doing a brain dump. Write whatever comes to mind without editing, judging, or organizing your thoughts. Then ask yourself: "What is my heart trying to tell me that my mind has been avoiding?" Because sometimes healing begins the moment we stop holding everything inside. Resources + Next Steps

Episode Description "What if the problem was never that you weren't enough?" In this episode of Grieve That Sh!t, Sharon Brubaker, grief specialist and founder of The Grief School, sits down with licensed professional counselor, trauma specialist, speaker, and co-author Dawna Daigneault for a powerful conversation about self-worth, grief, and the stories we carry about ourselves. Because grief doesn't just break your heart. Sometimes it breaks the way you see yourself. After a significant loss, many grievers find themselves asking questions they never expected: Who am I now? Why do I feel invisible? Why do I feel abandoned? Why do I suddenly feel like I'm not enough? Dawna introduces the concept of birthright self-worth—the idea that your worth was never something you had to earn. It was yours from the moment you arrived in this world. Together, Sharon and Dawna explore how family systems, childhood experiences, trauma, grief, shame, and relationships shape the way we view ourselves. They discuss why so many people spend their lives chasing worth through achievement, productivity, appearance, or success, while never realizing the worth they were searching for was already there. This episode is a deep and healing conversation about what happens when grief uncovers old wounds, why loss often triggers questions about identity and value, and how learning to reconnect with your worth can change everything. Because sometimes grief isn't just about missing the person. Sometimes it's about rediscovering yourself. What You'll Learn in This Episode What "birthright self-worth" actually means Why worth is different from self-esteem and confidence How grief can trigger questions about identity and value The connection between childhood experiences and self-worth Why achievement, success, and productivity often become substitutes for worth How shame impacts the way we see ourselves The relationship between trauma and self-worth Why comparison keeps people stuck The difference between authentic worth and ego How healing begins when you reconnect with your value Questions to Sit With After Listening When did I first begin questioning my worth? What experiences taught me that I had to earn love, acceptance, or belonging? Do I tie my worth to achievement, productivity, appearance, or relationships? What parts of myself have I been trying to prove? What would change if I truly believed I was worthy simply because I exist? Homework for You Take a piece of paper and answer this question: "What makes me believe I am enough?" Then answer a second question: "Who taught me that I wasn't?" Write without judgment. Write without editing. Just tell the truth. Because sometimes healing begins when we stop trying to earn our worth and start remembering we already have it. Resources + Next Steps

Episode Description "Time doesn't heal grief. It just passes." In this episode of Grieve That Sh!t, Sharon Brubaker, grief specialist and founder of The Grief School, takes on some of the biggest grief myths we've all heard—and tells the truth about why they're keeping grievers stuck. "Just give it time." "Grief comes in waves." "You're never supposed to let go of the pain." "Grief is a roller coaster." We hear these phrases all the time. They're repeated at funerals, shared by friends, posted online, and passed from one griever to another. But are they actually helping? Or are they keeping people trapped in survival mode? In this powerful episode, Sharon breaks down the hidden messages behind common grief advice and explains why healing requires more than simply waiting for time to pass. She explores why so many grievers believe holding onto pain is the same as holding onto their person, why grief keeps showing up in waves, and what it really means to process loss instead of avoiding it. This episode is a reminder that grief is not something time fixes. It's something we learn to move through. Because healing doesn't happen by accident. It happens when we stop waiting and start doing the work. What You'll Learn in This Episode Why "just give it time" is some of the most misunderstood grief advice What time actually does—and doesn't do—for grief Why looking better is not the same as healing The truth about holding onto pain after loss Why many grievers fear letting go of their suffering What it means when grief comes in waves The difference between surviving grief and processing grief Why grief feels like a roller coaster—and how to step off How unprocessed grief continues to resurface Why healing requires action, not just time Questions to Sit With After Listening What am I waiting for time to fix? Am I healing my grief or simply learning how to hide it? What pain am I afraid to let go of? What emotions keep showing up over and over again? What would change if I stopped waiting and started processing? Homework for You Take out a piece of paper and answer this question: "What am I hoping time will do for me?" Write down every answer that comes up. Then ask yourself: "What if time isn't the thing that's supposed to heal this?" Because healing doesn't happen because enough days pass. Healing happens when you become willing to face the pain that's asking for your attention. Resources + Next Steps

Episode Description "What if the thing you've been carrying for years is actually grief?" In this episode of Grieve That Sh!t, Sharon Brubaker, grief specialist and founder of The Grief School, sits down with grief graduate and friend Elizabeth Keene to talk about a truth that changes everything: Not all grief comes from death. Sometimes grief comes from childhood wounds. Broken relationships. Disappointments. Rejection. Life experiences that never got processed. And years later, you're still carrying them around without realizing it. Elizabeth shares how she stumbled into Sharon's TikTok live completely by accident, asking a simple question about whether a romantic breakup could be considered grief. That question led her into grief work that uncovered more than twenty years of unresolved pain she didn't even know she was carrying. Together, Sharon and Elizabeth discuss the surprising ways grief shows up in everyday life, why so many people stay stuck in old pain, and what happens when you finally stop trying to "get over it" and learn how to process it instead. Elizabeth also shares the moment she experienced a physical release after doing grief work for the first time, how understanding the difference between thoughts and emotions changed everything, and why healing is possible even when you've spent decades believing it isn't. This episode is a powerful reminder that grief is bigger than death. And sometimes the healing you're searching for begins when you finally call it what it is. Grief. What You'll Learn in This Episode Why grief is about far more than death How unresolved life experiences continue affecting us for decades The 47+ different losses that can create grief Why people stay stuck even when they desperately want to move forward The difference between thoughts, stories, and emotions How grief work creates emotional and physical healing Why "just get over it" never works What happens when you finally process old pain How grief affects relationships, identity, and daily life Why healing doesn't erase your past—it changes your relationship with it Questions to Sit With After Listening What experiences from my past still carry emotional weight today? What pain have I been calling something else instead of grief? Have I been trying to think my way out of emotions? What losses have I never fully acknowledged? What would be possible if I finally put down the emotional weight I've been carrying? Homework for You Take out a notebook and create a timeline of your life. Start with your earliest memories and write down every event, relationship, disappointment, heartbreak, transition, or loss that affected you emotionally. Don't judge it. Don't minimize it. Just write it down. Then ask yourself: "What part of this might actually be grief?" Because healing often starts when we stop dismissing our experiences and start telling the truth about them. Resources + Next Steps

Episode Description "Healing didn't just change her life. It changed her purpose." In this episode of Grieve That Sh!t, Sharon Brubaker sits down again with Elizabeth Keene for Part 2 of their powerful conversation about grief, healing, and what happens when you finally stop surviving and start living. After doing her own grief work, Elizabeth experienced something she never expected. She didn't just heal. She found her calling. What started as a random TikTok scroll turned into a journey that transformed how she sees herself, other people, and the entire world. Now, after working through decades of unresolved grief, Elizabeth is becoming a certified grief specialist to help others navigate the pain she knows so well. Together, Sharon and Elizabeth dive into the reality that every person you meet is carrying a broken heart somewhere. They discuss why grief is not a life sentence, how emotional pain accumulates over time, and why so many people remain stuck in survival mode for years—or even decades. Elizabeth shares the moment she realized her own pain could become a pathway to helping others heal, the surprising connection between grief and trauma, and why doing grief work gave her something no amount of therapy, self-help, or distraction ever could: Peace. This episode is also a powerful conversation about purpose. Because sometimes the thing that breaks your heart becomes the very thing that teaches you how to help someone else heal theirs. And sometimes your greatest pain becomes your greatest gift. What You'll Learn in This Episode Why everyone is a griever The difference between carrying pain and processing it How grief accumulates throughout a lifetime Why grief is often connected to trauma and survival responses What happens when you stop avoiding emotional pain Why healing doesn't erase your story How grief work creates more peace, joy, and emotional freedom The role grief plays in purpose and personal growth Why people stay stuck in grief for decades How healing changes the way you show up for others Questions to Sit With After Listening What pain have I been carrying longer than I realize? Am I surviving my life or fully living it? What losses have shaped the person I am today? What would my life look like if I stopped carrying the emotional weight? Could my healing help someone else someday? Homework for You Write down this question: "What pain am I still carrying that no longer belongs in my backpack?" Then make a list. Don't judge it. Don't rank it. Don't minimize it. Just tell the truth. Because every unresolved hurt takes up space. And healing begins when you're willing to look at what you've been carrying. Resources + Next Steps

Episode Description "Your kids are already grieving. The question is whether they know how." In this episode of Grieve That Sh!t, Sharon Brubaker, grief specialist and founder of The Grief School, tackles one of the hardest parts of loss for parents: helping children grieve while you're grieving too. Because most parents believe their job is to protect their children from pain. But grief doesn't work that way. Children feel everything. They feel the tension. They feel the sadness. They feel the fear. They notice the silence. They notice the tears you hide. And when we avoid talking about grief, soften the truth, or pretend we're okay, they don't feel protected. They feel confused. In this powerful episode, Sharon explains why children do not need perfect answers. They need honest ones. They need to see what grief looks like. They need to learn that pain is something you move through, not something you avoid. Sharon shares why so many parents rush to fix, distract, or protect their children from grief, and how that often comes from their own fear of facing the pain. She also shares a deeply personal story about losing her favorite aunt at sixteen years old and how being left to figure grief out alone shaped her understanding of loss. This episode is a reminder that your children are watching. Not your words. Your grief. Because whether we realize it or not, we are teaching our children how to grieve every single day. And if we don't teach them? They'll end up where most of us did. Trying to figure it out alone. What You'll Learn in This Episode Why children experience grief differently than adults The truth about trying to protect kids from pain Why silence creates confusion during grief How children learn grief by watching the adults around them The difference between protecting your child and interrupting their grief Why honesty builds trust during loss Common mistakes parents make when talking about death How your own grief work helps your children heal Why children need presence more than perfect answers Questions to Sit With After Listening What emotions does my child's grief bring up in me? Am I protecting my child from pain... or protecting myself from watching it? What messages did I learn about grief growing up? How am I modeling grief for my children right now? What would change if I stopped pretending I was okay? Homework for You Take a piece of paper and write this question at the top: "What did I learn about grief growing up?" Then answer honestly. What did the adults around you teach you? Did they talk about grief? Did they hide it? Did they cry? Did they tell the truth? Because before we can teach our children how to grieve... We have to understand what we learned about grief ourselves. Resources + Next Steps

Episode Description "What you thought grief was… it isn't." In this episode of Grieve That Sh!t, Sharon Brubaker, grief specialist and founder of The Grief School, breaks down the real definition of grief and why so many grievers feel overwhelmed, exhausted, numb, angry, and emotionally out of control after loss. Because nobody taught us what grief actually is. We were taught how to survive it. Stay strong. Stay busy. Push it down. Keep going. Humans really decided emotional pain should be ignored until it starts leaking out sideways into every relationship. Strange little system. But grief is not just sadness. It is emotional, mental, physical, and deeply connected to the body. It affects your brain, nervous system, thoughts, emotions, and reactions. In this episode, Sharon talks about the brain fog, exhaustion, chest tightness, numbness, anger out of nowhere, and the feeling that your whole life split in half after loss. She also explains why grief itself is not the problem. The problem is resisting it, avoiding it, distracting yourself from it, and pretending it is not there. Because unprocessed grief does not disappear. It waits. It builds. And eventually it starts showing up in every part of your life. This episode is also a powerful teaching on what it actually means to process grief. Not just talking about it, but learning how to lean into the pain long enough for your body to move through it. Because your body already knows how to grieve. It was designed to. What You'll Learn in This Episode Why grief is more than sadness What a full-body grief experience looks like Why grief causes brain fog, exhaustion, and numbness The difference between surviving grief and processing grief Why avoiding grief keeps people stuck What it actually means to process grief How unprocessed grief starts showing up in daily life Questions to Sit With After Listening What was I taught grief should look like? What emotions have I been trying to avoid? Am I processing my grief… or surviving it? Where is grief showing up in my body right now? Homework for You Write this question at the top of a page: "What was I taught to do with grief?" Then answer honestly. Because most people were never taught how to process grief. They were taught how to hide it. Resources + Next Steps

Episode Description "What you thought grief was… it isn't." In this episode of Grieve That Sh!t, Sharon Brubaker, grief specialist and founder of The Grief School, breaks down the real definition of grief and why so many grievers feel overwhelmed, exhausted, numb, angry, and emotionally out of control after loss. Because nobody taught us what grief actually is. We were taught how to survive it. Stay strong. Stay busy. Push it down. Keep going. Humans really decided emotional pain should be ignored until it starts leaking out sideways into every relationship. Strange little system. But grief is not just sadness. It is emotional, mental, physical, and deeply connected to the body. It affects your brain, nervous system, thoughts, emotions, and reactions. In this episode, Sharon talks about the brain fog, exhaustion, chest tightness, numbness, anger out of nowhere, and the feeling that your whole life split in half after loss. She also explains why grief itself is not the problem. The problem is resisting it, avoiding it, distracting yourself from it, and pretending it is not there. Because unprocessed grief does not disappear. It waits. It builds. And eventually it starts showing up in every part of your life. This episode is also a powerful teaching on what it actually means to process grief. Not just talking about it, but learning how to lean into the pain long enough for your body to move through it. Because your body already knows how to grieve. It was designed to. What You'll Learn in This Episode Why grief is more than sadness What a full-body grief experience looks like Why grief causes brain fog, exhaustion, and numbness The difference between surviving grief and processing grief Why avoiding grief keeps people stuck What it actually means to process grief How unprocessed grief starts showing up in daily life Questions to Sit With After Listening What was I taught grief should look like? What emotions have I been trying to avoid? Am I processing my grief… or surviving it? Where is grief showing up in my body right now? Homework for You Write this question at the top of a page: "What was I taught to do with grief?" Then answer honestly. Because most people were never taught how to process grief. They were taught how to hide it. Resources + Next Steps

Episode Description "Your life isn't broken. Your heart is." In this episode of Grieve That Sh!t, Sharon Brubaker, grief specialist and founder of The Grief School, breaks down why so many grievers stay stuck in pain for years… even while trying everything they can to survive it. After losing her nephew Austin, Sharon realized the problem wasn't that grievers were weak. The problem was that nobody taught us how to grieve. So we stay busy. We avoid the pain. We push it down. And we keep trying to "get over" something our body is still trying to process. In this episode, Sharon explains the real work of grief. Not just talking about it. Not pretending you're okay. But understanding what grief actually is, why your body reacts the way it does, and what it means to truly process pain instead of carrying it forever. She also talks about "completion", the unfinished conversations, emotions, and words that stay trapped inside the body after loss. The things you still need to say. The anger. The guilt. The love. The goodbye you never got. Because undelivered emotions do not disappear. This conversation is not about "moving on." It's about finally understanding what grief is trying to do inside you… so you can stop fighting yourself. What You'll Learn in This Episode Why grief feels like a full-body experience The difference between surviving grief and processing it Why staying busy keeps grief stuck What "completion" actually means in grief How unfinished emotions stay trapped in the body Why avoiding grief makes it louder over time How to separate love from pain Questions to Sit With After Listening Take your time with these. What have I still not said? What emotions have I been trying to avoid? Am I processing my grief… or just surviving it? What pain am I still carrying that was never expressed? Homework for You Write this at the top of a page: "What is still left unsaid?" Then let yourself answer honestly. Not the polite version. Not the strong version. The real one. Because grief doesn't stay stuck because you loved too much. It stays stuck when everything inside you goes unspoken. Resources + Next Steps If this episode hit you, it's because something inside you is ready to stop surviving and start understanding your grief. You don't have to carry this alone.

Episode Description "You're not broken. You're trying to heal something you don't even understand." In this episode of Grieve That Sh!t, Sharon Brubaker, grief specialist and founder of The Grief School, breaks down the real reason so many people feel stuck in their grief. After losing her nephew Austin, Sharon learned that grief isn't just about loss. It's about what happens when you're left trying to survive something no one ever taught you how to process. No one gave you the language. No one gave you the instructions. And now you're trying to figure it out while you're in it. In this episode, Sharon walks through why grief feels so overwhelming, how misinformation and avoidance keep it stuck, and why staying busy, pushing it down, or trying to "get over it" only makes it louder over time. She also explains how grief actually works in your body and mind, why the pain keeps coming back, and what it really takes to move through it. This conversation is not about doing grief perfectly. It's about understanding it. Because when you understand your grief, you stop fighting yourself. What You'll Learn in This Episode Why you feel stuck in your grief How lack of understanding keeps grief from moving Why staying busy and avoiding emotions makes it worse How grief shows up in your body, thoughts, and identity The difference between surviving and actually healing Why grief keeps coming back stronger when it's not processed Questions to Sit With After Listening Take your time with these. Do I actually understand what grief is… or am I guessing? Am I trying to survive this… or actually heal it? What have I been doing to avoid feeling my grief? Where am I fighting against something I don't understand? Homework for You Write this at the top of a page: "What do I not understand about my grief?" Then answer honestly. Not what you've heard. Not what sounds right. The truth. Because you cannot move something you don't understand. Resources + Next Steps If this episode hit you, it's because something in you is ready to stop guessing and start understanding your grief. You don't have to stay stuck here.

Episode Description "Your child doesn't need the pain removed. They need you to help them move through it." In this episode of Grieve That Sh!t, Sharon Brubaker, grief specialist and founder of The Grief School, breaks down one of the biggest mistakes parents make when their child is grieving. After losing her nephew Austin, Sharon learned that grief isn't something you can protect someone from. Especially not your child. Because your kids already feel everything. They feel your silence. They feel your sadness. They feel what's not being said. They just don't have the words for it. In this episode, Sharon walks through what actually happens when parents try to shield their children from grief, why that instinct makes sense, and how it unintentionally creates confusion, fear, and isolation. She also explains what children really need, how to talk to them about loss, and why your own grief work is the most powerful tool you have to help them. This conversation is not about being a perfect parent. It's about telling the truth. Because your child is not learning from what you say. They're learning from what you show. What You'll Learn in This Episode Why children feel everything, even when they can't express it What happens when you try to protect them from grief Why avoiding the truth creates confusion instead of comfort How children process grief differently from adults Why your own grief work matters more than what you say How to talk to your child about death in a way they can understand Questions to Sit With After Listening Take your time with these. What am I trying to protect my child from? Am I avoiding their grief… or my own? What emotions from my child are hardest for me to sit with? What did I learn about grief growing up… and how is that showing up now? Homework for You Write this at the top of a page: "What am I trying to protect my child from?" Then answer honestly. Not the version that sounds like you're doing it right. The real one. Because clarity is what builds trust. And trust is what makes grief safer. Resources + Next Steps If this episode hit you, it's because something in you is ready to stop avoiding and start understanding grief, for you and your child. You don't have to figure this out alone.

Episode Description "Grief is already painful. But the way you're trying to survive it might be making it harder." In this episode of Grieve That Sh!t, Sharon Brubaker, grief specialist and founder of The Grief School, breaks down what most people unknowingly do in the first year of grief that increases their suffering. After losing her nephew Austin, Sharon learned that grief is not just about loss. It is about what happens when you're left trying to survive something no one ever taught you how to process. The first year is the most confusing. The most painful. And the year you get the worst advice. Stay strong. Keep busy. Don't think about it. But these strategies do not heal grief. They delay it. In this episode, Sharon walks through four common patterns that make grief heavier: avoiding your emotions, pretending you're okay, comparing your timeline to others, and staying busy to escape the pain. She explains why these responses make sense, why your brain uses them to protect you, and why they end up keeping grief stuck and louder over time. This conversation is not about doing grief perfectly. It is about becoming aware of what is actually happening. Because you are not doing it wrong. You were just never taught how to do it at all. What You'll Learn in This Episode Why the first year of grief feels the hardest How avoiding emotions actually increases suffering Why pretending you're okay creates isolation The danger of comparing your grief to others How staying busy keeps grief from being processed Why your reactions make sense (even if they're not helping) Questions to Sit With After Listening Take your time with these. What emotions have I been avoiding since the loss? Where am I pretending I'm okay when I'm not? Have I been comparing my grief to someone else's timeline? When do I actually allow myself to sit with my grief? Homework for You Write this at the top of a page: "What have I been doing to avoid my grief?" Then answer honestly. Not the strong answer. Not the version that sounds like you're handling it well. The real one. Because awareness is where healing begins. Resources + Next Steps If this episode hit you, it's because something in you is ready to stop avoiding and start understanding your grief. You don't have to figure this out alone.

Episode Description "Your brain is not trying to hurt you. It's trying to understand what just changed your entire life." In this episode of Grieve That Sh!t, Sharon Brubaker, grief specialist and founder of The Grief School, breaks down why your mind keeps replaying the moment your person died. After losing her nephew Austin, Sharon learned that grief is not just emotional. It is a full body and brain experience that records life-altering moments with intense detail. The phone call. The hospital room. The last words. These moments stay vivid not because something is wrong with you, but because your brain is trying to make sense of what happened. In this episode, Sharon explains how trauma and memory work together, why your brain keeps returning to the same moment, and how shock and disbelief keep the story from fully settling. She also breaks down the connection between thoughts and emotions, why painful memories keep triggering emotional waves, and how speaking your story out loud helps the brain begin organizing the experience. This conversation is not about stopping the replay instantly. It is about understanding why it is happening. Because when you understand your grief, you stop being afraid of your own mind. What You'll Learn in This Episode Why your brain replays the moment your person died How trauma impacts memory and emotional intensity Why grief feels like a full body experience The connection between thoughts and emotional pain Why shock and disbelief keep the memory looping How talking about your story helps your brain process it Why you are not broken for thinking about it Questions to Sit With After Listening Take your time with these. What moment does my mind keep going back to? What part of that story still feels unfinished or unclear? Have I been afraid of my thoughts instead of understanding them? Where can I safely begin to talk about this out loud? Homework for You Write this at the top of a page: "This is the moment my life changed." Then describe it. What you saw. What you heard. What you felt. Not to relive it. But to begin organizing it. Because what your brain keeps replaying is what it is still trying to understand. Resources + Next Steps If this episode resonated with you, it is because your mind is trying to process something that has never been fully spoken. You don't have to do that alone.

Episode Description "The part of your grief that hurts the most is often the part you never say out loud." In this episode of Grieve That Sh!t, Sharon Brubaker, grief specialist and founder of The Grief School, talks about the stories grievers carry but rarely share. After losing her nephew Austin, Sharon learned that grief is not just about missing someone. It is also about the moments that changed everything—the phone call, the hospital room, the last words, the unanswered questions. These are the parts most people don't talk about. Not because they don't want to. But because they don't feel safe to. In this episode, Sharon explains why grievers stop sharing their stories, how silence builds over time, and what happens when those memories have nowhere to go. She breaks down how the brain replays painful moments, why these memories stay stuck, and why speaking them out loud is one of the most important parts of processing grief. She also introduces The Story Room, a space created for grievers to share the full truth of their experience—without judgment, interruption, or being corrected. This conversation is not about making grief smaller. It is about giving it a place to be heard. Because healing does not begin when the pain goes away. It begins when the story is finally spoken. What You'll Learn in This Episode Why grievers are afraid to share certain parts of their story What happens when grief stories are kept inside Why painful memories replay over and over again How silence increases isolation and emotional weight Why telling your grief story helps the brain process it The importance of being witnessed in your grief How The Story Room creates a safe space for real grief Questions to Sit With After Listening Take your time with these. What parts of my grief have I never said out loud? Am I holding back my story to protect other people's comfort? What memories keep replaying in my mind? Where do I feel like I have no place to share this? Homework for You Write this at the top of a page: "This is the part of my grief I've never said out loud." Then write it. Not the edited version. Not the acceptable version. The real one. Because what stays unspoken stays heavy. Resources + Next Steps If this episode spoke to you, it is because there is a part of your story that needs to be heard. You do not have to carry it alone.

Episode Description "Grief doesn't feel confusing because you're broken. It feels confusing because no one ever showed you how to understand it." In this episode of Grieve That Sh!t, Sharon Brubaker, grief specialist and founder of The Grief School, breaks down one of the biggest gaps in grief support: no one actually helps you understand your grief. After losing her nephew Austin, Sharon learned that grief is not just sadness. It is a full body experience that affects your sleep, your thoughts, your memory, your identity, and your daily life. And yet, most people are never given the space to look at it. Instead, they are given comfort. They are given timelines. They are told to keep going. But what they are not given is understanding. In this episode, Sharon introduces the purpose behind the Grief Assessment—a structured conversation designed to help you finally look at your grief honestly and begin to make sense of what you are experiencing. She explains why grief feels so overwhelming, why your mind keeps replaying moments, and why talking through your story is one of the most important parts of processing it. This conversation is not about fixing you. It is about helping you understand what is happening inside of you. Because healing does not begin with answers. It begins with understanding. What You'll Learn in This Episode Why most grievers never get a real understanding of their grief How grief affects your body, mind, and daily functioning Why your brain keeps replaying painful moments The role of telling your grief story in healing What the Grief Assessment actually is and how it works How patterns like avoidance, guilt, and isolation show up Why confusion decreases when you begin to understand your grief Questions to Sit With After Listening Take your time with these. Have I ever truly been asked about my grief? What parts of my story have I not fully spoken out loud? Where is my grief showing up in my body and daily life? What patterns am I noticing in how I handle my grief? Homework for You Write this at the top of a page: "How is my grief actually showing up in my life?" Then answer honestly. Not the short version. Not the version you tell others. The real one. Because understanding your grief is the first step to moving it. Resources + Next Steps If this episode resonated with you, it is because something in you is ready to understand your grief on a deeper level. You don't need to keep guessing. You don't need to figure this out alone.

Episode Description "You're not stuck because you still love them. You're stuck because of the attachment." In this episode of Grieve That Sh!t, Sharon Brubaker, grief specialist and founder of The Grief School, sits down with a narc recovery coach and author of Toxic Charm to break down one of the most confusing and painful relationship dynamics people experience. After losing her nephew Austin, Sharon learned that grief is not just about death. It shows up anywhere attachment is broken. And when narcissistic patterns are involved, that attachment becomes even more intense, unstable, and hard to walk away from. Together, they unpack what narcissism actually looks like in real life, why it feels like love one moment and disappears the next, and why so many people stay stuck trying to figure the other person out instead of coming back to themselves. They explore how these relationships create emotional highs and lows, how patterns repeat, and why clarity—not more guessing—is what begins to shift everything. This conversation is not about labeling people. It is about understanding patterns. Because sometimes the hardest truth is this: You can love someone… and still be stuck in something that is hurting you. What You'll Learn in This Episode What narcissism actually is in plain language Why these relationships feel intense, addictive, and confusing The difference between selfish behavior and narcissistic patterns Why you do not need a diagnosis to begin your healing How attachment and grief keep you tied to the relationship Why "just leave" is not as simple as it sounds How to start rebuilding self-trust after losing yourself Why patterns matter more than labels Questions to Sit With After Listening Take your time with these. Am I holding on to who they are… or who I hoped they could be? What patterns have I been ignoring or explaining away? Have I been trying to understand them more than I understand myself? What would it look like to choose clarity over confusion? Homework for You Write this at the top of a page: "What patterns did I experience that I kept trying to explain away?" Then answer honestly. Not the version that protects them. Not the version that minimizes what happened. The real one. Because you cannot break a cycle you are still trying to justify. Resources + Next Steps If this episode resonated with you, it is because something in you is ready for clarity. You do not need to keep guessing. You do not need to keep decoding. You do not need to keep losing yourself trying to make it make sense.

Episode Description "Grief does not get louder because you are weak. It gets louder because it has nowhere to land." In this episode of Grieve That Shit, Sharon Brubaker, grief specialist and founder of The Grief School, talks about something most grievers never receive after loss: a true witness to their grief story. After losing her nephew Austin, Sharon learned that grief is not just sadness. It is the mind and body trying to process something life changing that the world around you quickly moves on from. While everyone else returns to their normal life, the griever often finds themselves living in what Sharon calls the alternate universe of grief. And when there is no safe place to speak the story out loud, the grief does not disappear. It loops. It replays. It grows louder inside the nervous system. In this episode, Sharon explains why the brain keeps replaying painful memories after loss, how unspoken grief stays trapped in the body, and why having a witness is one of the most powerful parts of healing. She also introduces The Story Room, a space created for women to share their grief story out loud in a room of people who understand, listen without judgment, and hold space for the truth of what loss actually feels like. This conversation is not about fixing grief. It is about finally giving it a place to land. Because grief does not need to be corrected. It needs to be witnessed. What You'll Learn in This Episode Why every griever has a grief story that needs to be told What happens when grief has no witness Why the brain keeps replaying painful memories after loss How silence can keep grief stuck in the nervous system Why speaking your grief story out loud can begin to shift the pain What makes the Story Room different from typical grief support spaces How witnessing someone else's grief can help you process your own Questions to Sit With After Listening You do not need to rush these. Let them sit with you. When did my grief story actually begin? Have I had a place where my grief could be spoken without correction or comparison? What parts of my story have I been editing or keeping quiet? What is my grief still trying to say? Homework for You Write this at the top of a page: "This is the part of my grief story I have never said out loud." Then start writing. Not the version you tell people. Not the shortened version. Not the strong version. The real one. Because sometimes the first step in healing grief is simply letting the story be heard. Resources + Next Steps If this episode spoke to you, the place Sharon created for this work is called The Story Room. It is a guided grief space where women can share their story, be witnessed, and begin processing grief in a room that understands. The Story Room meets the every Thursday.

Episode Description "Unprocessed grief does not disappear. It shows up in the way you attach, the way you fear, and the way you love." In this episode of Grieve That Shit, Sharon Brubaker, grief specialist and founder of The Grief School, sits down with Sean Walker, a faith-based relationship coach who helps men and women understand attachment patterns, regulate their nervous systems, and stop repeating the same painful relationship cycles. After losing her nephew Austin, Sharon learned that grief is not just sadness. It is what happens when love has nowhere to land. And that same injury can show up after death, divorce, breakup, abandonment, or the loss of a connection that was never safely formed. Together, Sharon and Sean unpack the powerful overlap between grief and attachment. They explore how early relationships shape the way we love, why people cling or shut down, how labels can help but also keep people stuck, and what it really means to heal at the soul level instead of just trying to fix the relationship. This conversation is not about dating tricks. It is about internal rewiring. Because sometimes the real heartbreak is not just who left. It is the pattern that keeps getting repeated. What You'll Learn in This Episode How grief and attachment are deeply connected Why breakup pain is often more than "just a breakup" What anxious and avoidant attachment can look like in real life Why people over-identify with labels instead of doing the healing work How unprocessed grief can keep showing up in dating and relationships Why you can still love someone and know the relationship is not right for you What it means to build security that lasts beyond marriage or romantic love Questions to Sit With After Listening You do not need to answer these quickly. Am I grieving a person, a relationship, or a version of safety I never had? What patterns do I keep repeating in love? Have I been using labels to understand myself — or to avoid feeling? Do I want love from a place of wholeness, or do I need it to prove I'm okay? Homework for You Write this at the top of a page: "What am I really grieving in love?" Then answer honestly. Not the polished answer. Not the spiritual answer. Not the one that makes you sound healed. The real one. Because you cannot heal what you keep misnaming. Resources + Next Steps Find Sean Walker on social media at Coach Sean Walker Explore his resources, including Feel to Heal and Beat the Breakup

Episode Description "Grief deserves care. It does not deserve to be shoved in a corner." In this episode of Grieve That Shit, Sharon Brubaker, grief specialist and founder of The Grief School, pulls back the curtain and finally answers the question: What actually is The Grief School? After losing her nephew Austin, Sharon learned the hard way that grief is not something you "get over." It cracks your heart open. It shifts your identity. It leaves you standing in the aftermath asking, What the hell am I supposed to do now? The Grief School was built for that moment. This episode walks you through every layer of the community — from the free Facebook spaces to the Story Room, Courage Club, Processing the Pain of Grief, Forever Changed, Honor Society, and beyond. Sharon explains how each space is designed to help women stop performing, start telling the truth, and finally process what actually happened to their hearts. This is not about moving on. It is about healing a broken heart in community. Because grief is heavy enough. Carrying it alone makes it heavier. What You'll Learn in This Episode What The Grief School actually is — and who it's for The difference between the free community spaces and the private university How the Story Room creates a safe place to speak the truth What happens inside Processing the Pain of Grief What Forever Changed really means — and why integration matters Why grief healing requires structure, community, and courage Questions to Sit With After Listening You do not need to rush these. What has happened in my life that cracked my heart open? Have I been trying to carry this alone? Where do I need to be witnessed instead of fixed? Am I ready to learn the truth about my grief? Homework for You Ask yourself: "Where is the safest place for me to begin?" Maybe it's listening. Maybe it's joining the free Facebook group. Maybe it's coming to the Story Room. Just take one step. Healing doesn't start with perfection. It starts with showing up. Resources + Next Steps Join the private Facebook group: The Grief School Sign up for the Story Room or Grief 101 using the links below

Episode Description "Healing happens in moments. And sometimes one moment changes everything." In this episode of Grieve That Shit, Sharon Brubaker, grief specialist and founder of The Grief School, sits down with Emily, founder of Moment Cares — a full-service recovery and mental health support organization helping individuals and families navigate substance use, trauma, and emotional crisis. After losing her nephew Austin, Sharon learned that grief is not just sadness. It lives in the body. It hides in addiction. It shows up as anxiety, avoidance, overworking, numbing, and survival mode. And in this powerful conversation, Sharon and Emily connect the dots between grief, trauma, addiction, and the nervous system. With 18 years of personal sobriety and 15 years of professional experience, Emily shares how her own recovery journey revealed something deeper: alcohol and drugs are often not the root problem — they are the symptom. Underneath is unprocessed pain. Unfelt grief. A nervous system stuck in fear. Together, they explore the head–heart connection, why so many people live disconnected from their bodies, and how learning to sit with emotion — even for one minute — can begin to change everything. This episode is not just about addiction. It is about grief, trauma, community, and connection. Because healing does not happen in isolation. It happens when someone says, "Me too." What You'll Learn in This Episode How addiction and numbing behaviors are often responses to unprocessed grief Why sitting with emotion feels terrifying — and why it actually sets you free The difference between intellectualizing pain and feeling it in the body How trauma disconnects us from our own nervous system Why community is one of the most powerful tools in recovery How mental health, grief, and substance use are deeply connected Questions to Sit With After Listening You do not need to answer these all at once. What have I been using to avoid feeling? Is my struggle really about the surface behavior — or something deeper? Where did I learn that my emotions were not safe? Who is safe enough for me to begin telling the truth? Homework for You The next time you feel overwhelmed, pause. Ask yourself: "What am I feeling in my body right now?" Not what you're thinking. Not the story. Just the feeling. Sit with it for one minute. Watch what happens. That minute might be your moment. Resources + Next Steps Learn more about Emily and Moment Cares at momentcares.com

Episode Description "You may not get to choose what you feel. But you do get to choose what you practice." In this episode of Grieve That Shit, Sharon Brubaker, grief specialist and founder of The Grief School, breaks down something most grievers have never been told: You have choices in your grief. After losing her nephew Austin, Sharon learned that grief feels automatic. The memories. The body reactions. The waves that hit before you're even fully awake. It can feel like something is happening to you — and you are stuck. But what if you are not stuck? This episode walks through 10 real choices every griever faces — not fluffy mindset shifts, but nervous-system level decisions that shape whether you stay in survival mode or begin moving toward healing. From avoidance vs. engagement, to isolation vs. regulated support, to surviving vs. living again — Sharon challenges the belief that time alone heals and invites you into active participation in your own healing. This episode is not about forcing feelings. It is about practicing safety. Because grief healing is not passive. It is something you participate in. What You'll Learn in This Episode Why you cannot always choose your emotions — but you can choose your response The difference between avoidance and true engagement How isolation keeps the nervous system in threat mode Why intellectualizing grief is not the same as processing it What it actually means to retrain your nervous system How survival mode becomes a habit — and how to slowly shift out of it Questions to Sit With After Listening You do not need to rush these. Where am I avoiding instead of engaging? Am I waiting for time to fix this — or am I participating in healing? Who feels safe enough to witness my grief without trying to fix it? What am I practicing daily — survival or safety? Homework for You Write this at the top of a page: "What am I practicing in my grief?" Then list your honest answers. No shame. No judgment. Just awareness. Then circle one choice you are ready to practice differently this week. Healing does not happen by accident. It happens by repetition. Resources + Next Steps

Episode Description "Your grief is not a burden. Your silence is." In this episode of Grieve That Shit, Sharon Brubaker, grief specialist and founder of The Grief School, asks a hard but necessary question: What is your grief costing you? After losing her nephew Austin, Sharon learned that grief does not just take the person you love. It takes your energy. Your focus. Your sense of self. And when you start hiding it, it takes even more. Many grievers believe staying quiet makes them strong. They believe pretending to be "okay" protects the people around them. But silence does not protect you. It isolates you. It disconnects you. It keeps you stuck in survival mode. This episode explores the hidden cost of emotional suppression and why grief needs a place to land. This episode is not about falling apart. It is about telling the truth. Because healing does not happen in hiding. It happens when your pain is seen. What You'll Learn in This Episode Why hiding your grief drains your energy and disconnects you from support How silence keeps you stuck in survival mode The difference between protecting others and abandoning yourself Why grief needs space, air, and honesty to begin healing Simple, practical ways to start telling the truth about your pain Questions to Sit With After Listening You do not need to rush these. What has my grief been costing me emotionally? Where have I been pretending instead of telling the truth? Who feels safe enough to hear even a small piece of my pain? What is one thing I need to say out loud this week? Homework for You At the top of a page, write: "What my silence is costing me." Be honest. No performing. No minimizing. Just tell the truth. Then circle one small step you can take this week to let your grief have a place to land. That is where the shift begins. Resources + Next Steps

Episode Description "Grief does not disappear when you ignore it. It just gets heavier when you carry it alone." In this episode of Grieve That Shit, Sharon Brubaker, grief specialist and founder of The Grief School, opens an honest conversation about men, grief, and emotional pain. After losing her nephew Austin, Sharon learned that grief is not just sadness. It is a full-body experience that affects thoughts, emotions, and the nervous system. And while grief impacts everyone, many men are taught early that strength means silence. This episode challenges the belief that "big boys don't cry" and explores what really happens when men are never given space to feel, talk, or be witnessed in their grief. Sharon is joined by Coach Martize of The Frazier Group, who brings his personal story and professional experience into the conversation. Together, they unpack how emotional suppression is learned, why avoidance is not weakness but survival, and how outdated beliefs keep people stuck long after the loss. This episode is not about fixing grief. It is about creating space for it. Because pain does not need to be handled. It needs to be held. What You'll Learn in This Episode Why emotional pain is often avoided, not because of weakness, but because of conditioning How men are taught to survive instead of feel The difference between strength and emotional suppression Where beliefs about toughness and vulnerability come from Why grief needs space, not silence Questions to Sit With After Listening You do not need to answer these quickly. Where did I learn that showing emotion was unsafe? What feelings have I been pushing down instead of listening to? How has "being strong" shaped the way I grieve? Where do I need space instead of advice? Homework for You Write this at the top of a page: "What I was taught about emotions." Now finish the sentence honestly. No fixing. No explaining. Just notice what comes up. That awareness matters. Resources + Next Steps

"You were never meant to grieve quietly. Your emotions didn't show up to hurt you. They showed up to help you process what just happened." In this episode of Grieve That Shit, Sharon Brubaker, Certified Grief Specialist and founder of The Grief School, sits down with Nikki to talk about a kind of loss that cuts straight to the core. The loss of a mother who was also a best friend. After losing her nephew Austin, Sharon learned that grief isn't one-dimensional. There are layers. And one of the most overlooked layers is the grief that comes from losing the person who knew you, guided you, and helped you make sense of life. In this conversation, Nikki shares the story of her mom Cheryl. Not just who she was, but how deeply intertwined she was in every part of her life. From daily texts and phone calls to faith, caregiving, unanswered prayers, and the shock of having no time to prepare. This episode explores what happens when grief collides with faith, when anger at God feels unavoidable, and when the foundation you were raised on both supports you and breaks your heart at the same time. We talk about the reality of caregiving, the trauma of watching someone you love decline, and the quiet ways people stay connected after loss. Keeping a phone on. Sending messages that will never be answered. Letting grandchildren leave voicemails. Choosing connection instead of rules. This is an honest, raw conversation about layered grief, unfinished moments, and learning how to live in a world where your anchor is gone. You're not doing grief wrong. You're responding to something that mattered deeply. Let's grieve that shit together. What You'll Hear in This Episode • Why losing a mother who was also a best friend creates a second layer of grief • How caregiving changes the grief experience before death even happens • What it's like to have no time to process before everything changes • How faith can both comfort and anger you after loss • Why staying connected in your own way is not wrong • The difference between healing and erasing the relationship Reflection Questions Take your time with these. There's no rush. Who was your person to you beyond the title they held in your life? What part of your grief do you feel most people don't understand? Where has faith supported you, and where has it felt complicated or painful? What unfinished moments or conversations still live in your body? What connection are you holding onto that brings you comfort, even if others wouldn't understand it? If you stopped judging your grief, what would you allow yourself to feel? Gentle Homework Write this sentence at the top of a page: "What hurts the most about losing them is…" Let yourself finish it without fixing, explaining, or softening the answer. That honesty is part of your healing. Resources + Next Steps

"She was more than her ending. And healing didn't mean letting her go. It meant letting the pain stop running the show." In Part 2 of this deeply personal episode of Grieve That Shit, Sharon Brubaker, grief specialist and founder of The Grief School, continues the raw conversation with Nikki about grieving a mother who was also her best friend. This episode moves beyond the loss and into what happens after the world keeps spinning and you're still stuck. Nikki shares what it was really like to resist grief work, to believe that suffering was the only way to honor her mom, and to carry guilt she didn't even realize she was holding. Together, Sharon and Nikki unpack one of the most painful grief lies of all: "If I heal, it means I didn't love them enough." You'll hear how healing finally began when Nikki stopped protecting the pain and allowed herself to tell the truth about what she lost, what she carried, and what she deserved next. This episode is about releasing unhealthy grief, honoring the full life of your person, and learning how to live again without betraying the love that came before. What You'll Hear in This Episode Why many grievers believe suffering equals loyalty How guilt hides inside grief and keeps you stuck What it means to be "more than their ending" Why healing doesn't erase love, memories, or connection How letting the pain soften creates space to celebrate your person again Questions to Sit With After Listening You don't have to answer these perfectly. Just honestly. Where have I believed that my pain is protecting my person? What part of my grief feels unhealthy, even if I don't want to admit it yet? Am I afraid that healing means leaving them behind? If my person could speak to me right now, what would they want for my life? What would it look like to grieve and live at the same time? Gentle Homework Write this sentence at the top of a page: "They were more than their ending." Now finish it without rushing. Let memories come. Let truth come. Let the love show up. You're not erasing them. You're letting their whole life matter again.

"Your brain didn't break when your person died. It's just doing what it knows—trying to protect you from pain. But grief doesn't live in your brain. It lives in your heart." In this episode of Grieve That Shit, Sharon Brubaker, Certified Grief Specialist and founder of The Grief School, dives deep into one of the biggest truths about grief: you can't think your way out of it. After losing her nephew Austin, Sharon discovered firsthand that grief isn't logical—it's emotional. Your brain tries to reason, fix, and explain the unexplainable, while your heart just breaks wide open. That war between the head and the heart? It's exactly why you feel like you're spinning. This episode unpacks the difference between intellect, emotion, and sensation—and shows why healing can only happen when you stop trying to "figure it out" and start feeling it. Sharon shares the same lessons that inspired her book This Is Grief and walks you through how to finally calm your mind so you can listen to your heart. Because the truth is: your heart already knows what your brain keeps trying to solve. What You'll Learn in This Episode Why grief is emotional—not intellectual—and how that changes everything The silent war between your brain and your heart after loss Why logic and reason can't fix what's broken in your soul How thoughts like "Why didn't I go?" or "I should have done more" keep you stuck in pain What it really means to "drop into your heart" and let it speak Homework for You If you've been spinning in your thoughts, here's your assignment: Grab a sheet of paper and write down one question that won't stop looping in your mind—like "Why me?" or "Why didn't I answer the phone?" Now write your honest answer. Don't edit. Don't analyze. Just let your heart respond. Then underneath that answer, finish this sentence: "What I really feel is…" That's where your healing begins—not in your thoughts, but in your truth. Resources + Next Steps

In Part Two of this Grieve That Shit conversation, Sharon Brubaker and Dr. Elijah Frazier move past introductions and into the heart of what grievers struggle with most: choice, accountability, faith, emotions, and permission to heal. This episode challenges one of the most damaging beliefs grievers carry—that grief is something they must endure forever. Sharon and Dr. Frazier speak directly to the idea that pain is inevitable after loss, but staying trapped in suffering is not the only option. They talk honestly about how grief can steal joy, peace, and energy when we are not aware of the choices we are making. Dr. Frazier introduces a powerful metaphor: your joy is on the auction block every day, and too often, people unknowingly give it away to pain, guilt, fear, or other people's expectations. The conversation also dives into faith, anger at God, and the pressure grievers feel to perform spirituality instead of telling the truth. Sharon and Dr. Frazier make it clear that real healing does not require pretending, suppressing emotions, or being "good" in your grief. It requires honesty, boundaries, and the willingness to do the work. This episode speaks directly to the griever who feels stuck, judged, or afraid to move forward. It offers permission to feel fully, question deeply, and still choose healing.  

In this episode of Grieve That Shit, Sharon Brubaker introduces a defining moment for The Grief School and the podcast. For the first time, she welcomes Dr. Elijah Frazier and shares the news that The Grief School is now powered by The Frazier Group. This is not an announcement episode filled with buzzwords or credentials. It's a conversation about people, pain, and what real care actually looks like when someone is at their breaking point. Sharon and Dr. Frazier talk openly about why grief cannot be handled by systems, scripts, or one-size-fits-all solutions. They explore the difference between easy work and necessary work, and why healing requires intentional relationships, honesty, and empowerment rather than dependency. Dr. Frazier shares his philosophy of care, his commitment to meeting people where they are, and why building a multidisciplinary team matters when someone's life has been shaken by loss. Together, they explain how grief, mental health, physical health, faith, and life circumstances are deeply connected and why separating them often leaves people stuck. This episode sets the foundation for what's coming next. It introduces a partnership built on trust, integrity, and the belief that grief deserves to be held by people, not processed through a system. This is part one of a two-part conversation. Part two goes deeper into grief, choice, and what it means to move forward without abandoning your pain.

"Grief is not a mental illness. It's not weakness. It's not a checklist to finish or a line you're supposed to move through. It's love—with nowhere left to go." In this episode of Grieve That Shit, Sharon Brubaker, Certified Grief Specialist and founder of The Grief School, gets brutally honest about everything grief isn't. For too long, society has treated grief like a disorder to diagnose, a problem to medicate, or a series of stages to climb. But grief isn't logical, linear, or tidy—it's wild, unpredictable, and deeply human. Sharon unpacks why labeling grief as depression or PTSD misses the truth entirely, and how our culture's obsession with "fixing" pain keeps us from actually healing it. You'll hear the truth about what happens when you zig and zag through your pain, why falling apart is part of the process, and why crying, rage, and exhaustion aren't weakness—they're proof that you loved deeply. Because grief isn't something you escape. It's something you integrate. It's the story of love that still lives in you, even when the person you loved is gone. What You'll Learn in This Episode Why grief is not a mental illness—and what it actually is The truth about the "five stages" and why they never applied to grievers Why grief isn't linear, logical, or something to "get over" How emotional chaos (crying, anger, numbness) is a normal part of healing The many ways we try to numb grief—through work, food, alcohol, or pretending Why facing your grief head-on is the only way through Homework for You This week, write this sentence at the top of a page: "Grief is not…" Then finish it five times, in your own words. "Grief is not something I can control." "Grief is not weakness." "Grief is not my enemy." Keep writing until the truth feels real in your body. You're not broken—you're human. Resources + Next Steps

"When your person died, a part of you died too. Not your whole self—but the version of you that only existed in connection with them. That's the part grief takes. That's what forever changed really means." In this episode of Grieve That Shit, Sharon Brubaker, Certified Grief Specialist and founder of The Grief School, opens her heart about what it truly means to be forever changed—but not broken. After losing her nephew Austin and later her best friend Sharon, her life split into two: before and after. But in this episode, she invites you into the middle—the space between who you were and who you're becoming. It's the unseen, disorienting place where identity, routine, and meaning fall apart. This is the part of grief no one talks about. The part where you're not who you were, but not yet who you'll be. Sharon calls it "the tween." And it's here, in the unknown, that real healing begins. You'll hear what it means to let go of the pieces that no longer match your truth, how to live with the absence that screams louder than words, and why being "forever changed" is not the same as being broken. Because the truth is—grief rewires your story. But you still get to decide how that story ends. What You'll Learn in This Episode The three phases of grief: before, between, and after Why your identity shifts after loss—and how to honor the version of you that's gone How to navigate the "tween," the unknown space between devastation and rebuilding The truth about being "forever changed, not broken" Why time doesn't fix grief—but processing the pain does Homework for You Find a quiet place this week and journal through these prompts: 1️⃣ What part of me died when they died? 2️⃣ What part of me is still here, waiting to be known again? 3️⃣ What truth am I ready to stop fighting? You don't have to have perfect answers. You just have to begin writing them. Because healing starts the moment you stop trying to go back—and start facing the after. Resources + Next Steps

Episode Summary: This episode cracks open one of the most frightening and misunderstood parts of grief: when a memory hits your body like a shock. You're sitting still, lost in a moment with your person, and suddenly your stomach drops, your breath tightens, your heart races, and you remember all over again that they died. It feels like you're grieving in two places at once. Sharon Brubaker takes you inside the neurobiology behind that jolt. She breaks down how the hippocampus pulls old memories like scenes from a movie, why the amygdala tags those memories as danger, and how your brain fires survival signals long before you can think. This isn't denial and it isn't weakness. It is your nervous system trying to protect you from emotional injury, and it moves faster than the rest of you can keep up. Through real-life examples and clear teaching, Sharon explains why certain memories hit harder, why they cycle over and over, and why it feels like the loss is happening in real time even years later. Most importantly, she shows you what it takes to calm the system that's been stuck on high alert and how real healing begins when you learn to process the pain—rather than waiting for it to fade on its own. Key Points Discussed: • Why your brain drops you into old memories without warning • How the hippocampus and amygdala replay emotional pain as if it's happening now • Why the body reacts before the mind understands • What reconciliation shock is and why it feels like losing your person twice • How unresolved emotion keeps your nervous system stuck in survival mode • Why memory jolts soften once grief pain is processed • What Processing the Pain of Grief teaches your brain to finally settle Journal Questions: • What memory pulls your body into a sudden drop • What part of that memory still feels emotionally unresolved • How does your body respond before your mind catches up • What does the second wave feel like when the truth hits • What would change in your life if your brain learned to soften these jolts Conclusion: These memory shocks don't mean you're going backwards. They don't mean you're in denial. They are the biology of grief doing what it was never taught to do differently. When you learn how to process the pain, the brain finally stops hitting the danger button every time you touch the past. Your system settles. The memories soften. The grief stops feeling like an ambush. This is the work. This is the shift. This is where healing begins. Contact Us: Ready to calm your grief brain and learn how to process the pain, not just survive it Join Sharon Brubaker inside Processing the Pain of Grief, her live classroom where you learn what your brain is doing, how grief works in the body, and how to move the pain out instead of holding it in. Learn more and get support inside The Grief School community. Website: thegriefschool.com Contact: info@thegriefschool.com TikTok, YouTube, Instagram: @thegriefschool

Episode Summary: In this episode of Grieve That Shit, Sharon Brubaker talks about something most grievers never see coming: why normal sounds suddenly feel like an attack. The kids laughing, the microwave door slamming, a choir starting at church, a car alarm in the parking lot. Things you used to handle just fine now hit your body like lightning. Sharon walks you through what is really happening inside your grieving brain. She breaks down the amygdala, the nervous system, the HPA axis, and why grief flips all of them into survival mode. This is not you "being dramatic." This is biology. Your brain is trying to protect your broken heart and it does not know the difference between emotional danger and physical danger. Through real stories from her clients, Sharon shows how jumpiness, noise sensitivity, snapping at people, and shutting down in crowds are not personality flaws. They are signs that your grief system is stuck on high alert and has not been taught how to turn off. Then she shows you the path out: learning how to calm your brain by processing the pain of grief instead of running from it. Key Points Discussed: Why everyday noise can feel like an attack when you are grieving How the amygdala scans for emotional pain and treats it like danger What happens to your thinking center when grief hits and why you feel numb How the sympathetic nervous system keeps your body in survival mode Why your senses feel sharper, your reactions bigger, and your patience thinner The four grief responses Sharon sees most often: resisting, reacting, avoiding, and pretending How stress hormones like cortisol and adrenaline keep your system on high alert Why this noise sensitivity is not permanent when you learn to process the pain How Processing the Pain of Grief helps calm your brain and soften your grief Journal Questions for Reflection: What sounds or situations make your body jump or tense up now that you are grieving Where do you notice your thinking has slowed down or feels foggy When was the last time you snapped or shut down and later realized you were not really mad at that person or thing What background noise or repeated behavior from others feels harder to tolerate since your loss What would it look like to give your brain and body a place to calm down instead of just pushing through Conclusion: Noise sensitivity in grief is not you "losing it." It is your grief biology doing its best to protect you with the only tools it knows. Your brain is on high alert. Your body is tired. Your system is trying to outrun the pain. But this does not have to be your forever. When you learn how to process the pain of grief, your nervous system can settle. Your thoughts get clearer. Your reactions soften. The world gets a little quieter again. You will still miss your person, but the grief does not have to feel like an attack every time a memory or a sound shows up. Contact Us: Ready to calm your grief brain and learn how to process the pain, not just survive it Join Sharon Brubaker inside Processing the Pain of Grief, her live classroom where you learn what your brain is doing, how grief works in the body, and how to move the pain out instead of holding it in. Learn more and get support inside The Grief School community. Website: thegriefschool.com Contact: info@thegriefschool.com TikTok, YouTube, Instagram: @thegriefschool

In this deeply moving and unforgettable episode of Grieve That Sh!t, grief specialist Sharon Brubaker shares a story that stopped her in her tracks, a moment that changed two families' lives forever. What began as an ordinary drive with her husband turned into a tragedy they witnessed unfold before their eyes. Through this raw, emotional experience, Sharon explores how quickly life can change, how grief shatters the illusion of time, and what it truly means to live with awareness, compassion, and love before it's too late. This episode isn't just about loss it's about the fragility of life, the depth of empathy, and the sacred invitation to love harder, forgive faster, and be present now.  

“Avoiding the pain won't make it go away—it only teaches it to hide.” In this episode of Grieve That Shit, grief specialist Sharon Brubaker breaks down one of the sneakiest traps that keeps grievers stuck: avoidance. When life shatters, the natural instinct is to run from the pain, to stay busy, and to pretend you're doing fine. But as Sharon reminds us, ignoring grief doesn't erase it—it buries it. This episode dives deep into what happens when we try to outsmart our pain. Sharon explains why our brains convince us to avoid reminders of our person, how distraction becomes a survival skill that turns into a lifestyle, and how avoidance slowly shrinks our world until even joy feels out of reach. She shares real, compassionate tools to help you stop running from grief and begin facing it—one small, brave step at a time. What You'll Learn in This Episode Why grief convinces you that avoiding pain will make it fade The difference between healthy, temporary breaks and lifelong avoidance How avoidance shows up in daily life—from over-cleaning to staying “too busy” Why the longer you avoid your grief, the smaller your world becomes Simple, gentle steps to start meeting your grief instead of running from it Homework for You Take five quiet minutes this week to notice when you avoid your feelings. Ask yourself: 1. What emotion am I trying not to feel right now? 2. Where do I feel it in my body? 3. Then set a time limit for your avoidance. 4. Give yourself permission to take a break, but also promise yourself to come back—to cry, to write, to feel. That's how you begin to heal. Resources + Next Steps Check what's happening in the Grief School: clickhereforhope.com Join Grief Study Hall – live support with Sharon every Tuesday at 1 PM CST Sign up for the Surviving Christmas Masterclass on November 8th to create your holiday grief plan Follow Sharon on TikTok and YouTube at @thegriefschool

“Grief isn't just sadness—it's a full-body takeover. It's the storm that hits when love has nowhere left to land.” In this episode of Grieve That Shit, Sharon Brubaker takes you back to the foundation of it all: understanding what grief actually is. For too long, we've been fed clichés about “moving on” or “staying strong,” while no one ever taught us how to live through the ache. Sharon unpacks the real definition of grief—the kind you feel in your bones. She shares what she wishes she'd known when her nephew Austin died, and why understanding the truth about grief changes everything. This isn't theory—it's lived experience, raw and unfiltered. You'll learn why grief isn't just emotional, but physical. Why it feels unnatural even though it's the most natural thing in the world. And why no two people grieve the same, even when they're mourning the same person. By the end of this episode, you'll stop asking “what's wrong with me?” and start realizing: nothing is wrong with you. Your grief is proof that you loved deeply. What You'll Learn in This Episode Why grief is normal and natural—and what that really means The truth about conflicted feelings and why you can miss someone and still feel relief they're gone How grief becomes physical, showing up in your body as much as in your heart Why your grief will never look like anyone else's How naming your grief gives you power to begin healing Homework for You Print this out and do it this week: Write down three moments when grief hits you the hardest. Is it when you wake up? When you reach for the phone to call them? When silence gets too loud? Then, for each moment, write one sentence starting with: “This is grief.” “This is grief when I reach for the phone.” “This is grief when I cook their favorite meal.” “This is grief when I laugh and feel guilty right after.” Naming it helps you see it for what it is—love looking for a place to land. Resources + Next Steps

“Loneliness in grief isn't just about missing your person—it's about missing the version of yourself you were when they were alive. Naming that loneliness is how you stop drowning in it.”  In this episode of Grieve That Shit, Sharon Brubaker takes on one of the hardest truths of grief: loneliness. Even in a crowded room, grief makes you feel like you're on another planet. People may surround you, but no one else can feel the exact pain you're carrying.  Sharon unpacks why grief is so isolating—why people avoid your pain, why you feel like you don't belong anywhere, and why loneliness feeds the heaviness of loss. Most importantly, she shows you how to name it, face it, and take small steps to soften it so it doesn't drown you.  What You'll Learn in This Episode  Why grief makes you feel lonely, even when you're not alone  How silence and avoidance from others deepen the isolation  The difference between missing your person and missing the version of yourself when they were alive  Why naming loneliness out loud is a powerful first step  Small ways to create connection when everything feels hollow  Homework for You  Print this out and do it this week:  Write down the moments when loneliness hits you the hardest.  Is it in the morning?  At night?  During family gatherings?  For each moment, write one small action you could try—not to erase the loneliness, but to soften it.  Call one safe person.  Light a candle and say their name.  Sit with someone who will let you cry without fixing it.    Resources + Next Steps  Download your free eBook: https://clickhereforhope.com/  Join Grief Study Hall – live support with Sharon every Tuesday at 1 PM CST. Sign up at Grief Study Hall 

“We should've been given hip-high boots and a damn instruction manual. Instead, we're dropped into grief with nothing but clichés. But here's the truth—you can face the pile, grieve it, and climb out.”  In this episode of Grieve That Shit, Sharon Brubaker gets brutally honest about what grief really feels like: like stepping straight into a hip-high pile of shit with no warning, no boots, and no map out.  Nobody prepared us for the sleepless nights, the chest-crushing pain, or the brain fog that makes you feel like you're losing your mind. Nobody told us grief would come with silence from friends, family drama, and the pressure to “be strong.” Instead, we're left to stumble through the mess with nothing but bad advice and our broken hearts.  This episode is your manual for facing that pile, wading through it, and finding a way out—without pretending it's not there.  What You'll Learn in This Episode  Why grief feels like drowning in a pile of shit no one warned us about  The ways society avoids preparing us for loss  How grief takes over your body and makes simple things feel impossible  The extra weight of silence, guilt, and bad advice  The first steps to facing grief instead of resisting it  Homework for You  Print this out and do it this week:  Write down your personal version of “the pile.”  Is it the silence from friends?  The guilt that won't let go?  The exhaustion that never ends?  The family drama that made it worse?  Circle the one part of the pile that feels heaviest right now. That's where you start. Naming it is the first step to grieving it.  Resources + Next Steps  Download your free eBook: https://clickhereforhope.com/  Join Grief Study Hall – live support with Sharon every Tuesday at 1 PM CST. Sign up at Grief Study Hall.

“The shit is not just the loss itself—it's the lies, the silence, the guilt, and the pressure that come with it. You didn't create it, but you can name it. And once you name it, you can grieve it.”  In this episode of Grieve That Shit, Sharon Brubaker breaks down what “the shit” actually means. Grief isn't just the pain of missing your person—it's all the lies, the silence, the pressure, and the guilt that come piled on top of the loss.  From the bad advice (“time heals”) to the avoidance (people ducking you at the grocery store), Sharon calls it out. This is the part nobody warns you about, the weight that makes grief feel heavier than it already is. And until you name it, you can't begin to move through it.  What You'll Learn in This Episode  The real meaning behind “grieve that shit”  Why clichés and cultural rules about grief keep you stuck  How silence and avoidance from others add to the pain  The difference between grieving your person and grieving the shit around the loss  Why naming the shit is the first step toward healing  Homework for You  Print this out and work through it:  1. Write your personal list of “the shit” you've been carrying.  o   What lies have you been told?  o   What guilt do you wrestle with?  o   What moments still knock the wind out of you?  2. Say it out loud: “This is my pile of shit.” Don't soften it. Don't excuse it. Just name it.  Resources + Next Steps  Download your free eBook: https://clickhereforhope.com/  Join Grief Study Hall – live support with Sharon every Tuesday at 1 PM CST. Sign up at Grief Study Hall    

“Grief is not polite. It's not delicate. It doesn't wait until you're ready. It crashes in and takes over your whole life. So let's stop pretending—and let's grieve that shit.” On the very first episode of Grieve That Shit, Sharon Brubaker rips the mask off grief and tells the truth: grief is messy, painful, and nothing like the world says it should be.  Sharon shares the moment her life split in two with the death of her nephew Austin and why she chose to call this podcast Grieve That Shit. You'll learn why clichés like “time heals” do more harm than good, why grief is a full-body experience, and why facing the pain head-on is the only way through.  This episode sets the tone for everything that's coming: raw honesty, calling out the lies, and creating a space where you can finally stop pretending and start healing. What You'll Learn in This Episode  Why Sharon chose the name Grieve That Shit  How grief takes over your entire body—not just your emotions  The truth about “being strong” and why it blocks healing  Why laughter and tears often show upside by side in grief  The first step toward actually healing    Homework for You  Print this out and do it this week:  Grab a notebook and write your version of the shit.  What lies have you been told about grief?  What feelings are you pushing down?  What moments knock the wind out of you?  Don't edit it. Don't make it pretty. Just get it on the page. Naming your pile of shit is the first step to grieving it.  Resources + Next Steps  Download your free eBook:   Download your free eBook: clickhereforhope.com  Join Grief Study Hall – live support with Sharon every Tuesday at 1 PM CST.   Sign up Grief Study Hall 

Episode Summary: Welcome to Healing Starts With the Heart, the podcast where grief meets resilience. In this episode, grief specialist Sharon Brubaker gets raw and real about the unspoken chaos of grief—what it feels like in your body, why your mind can't stop replaying the moment it all changed, and how society leaves us completely unprepared to deal with it. From the hospital diagnosis to the late-night phone call that split life into “before and after,” Sharon lays out what really happens when grief hits—and why it's not weakness, madness, or something you just “get over.” It's a full-body, full-heart experience that demands to be felt. If you've ever wondered “What the hell is happening to me?” this episode is your answer: you're not broken—you're grieving.

Episode Summary: Welcome to Healing Starts With the Heart, where grief gets real and healing gets honest. In this episode, grief specialist Sharon Brubaker pulls back the curtain on the 9 biggest lies we've been told about grief—and how they've shaped generations of silent suffering. From pretending you're okay to being told “just stay busy,” this episode is a deep and raw dive into the ways our society teaches us to perform instead of process our pain. If you've ever felt like you're grieving “wrong,” this is your invitation to unlearn the myths and finally make space for the truth: you are not broken—just unheard.

Episode Summary: In this powerful and raw episode of Healing Starts With the Heart, grief specialist Sharon Brubaker asks a deeply uncomfortable—but necessary—question: What if the pain isn't the problem… but the key to your healing? Sharon breaks down why so many of us are still stuck in our grief—not because we're doing it wrong, but because no one ever taught us how to feel the pain instead of managing it. From performative grief to inherited patterns, she shares how unprocessed pain keeps us in a holding pattern of burnout, resentment, and silence. You'll learn how to stop performing, start feeling, and allow grief to finally move through you—instead of staying trapped inside your body.

Episode Description: In this powerful episode of Healing Starts with the Heart, grief specialist Sharon Brubaker takes us into the often-unspoken world of collective grief—the grief that doesn't belong to just one person, one family, or one household. It belongs to all of us. When tragedy strikes a community—whether it's a school shooting, a local accident, a sudden death, or a public loss—every face reflects the sorrow. And every heart carries a piece of it. Sharon unpacks what it means to grieve together, how public mourning impacts private pain, and why it's so hard to know what to say or do. Through her personal story and the communities she's walked with through deep loss, this episode is a reminder: you are allowed to grieve, even if you weren't the one closest to the loss. If you've ever struggled to understand why you're hurting after a tragedy in your town—or if you've watched your community rally and then fall silent—this episode will help you name it, feel it, and find a way forward together. Key Points Covered: What community grief really is: How grief spreads beyond the immediate family and becomes a shared weight. The ripple effect of loss: Why neighbors, classmates, church members, teachers—even strangers—feel it too. When your grief becomes public: What it means when your pain is visible in grocery store aisles, in church pews, and across front porches. The awkwardness of support: Why communities show up with casseroles, candles, and balloon releases—because they don't know what else to do. No grief is “too small”: Even if your connection was distant, your pain is real and valid. What happens after the funeral: Why grief gets louder in the silence after the ceremonies, when the door closes and the cameras are gone. The trap of being “community strong”: Why telling people to “stay strong” shuts down healing—and what to say instead. The importance of afterward support: How real community healing starts not just with rituals, but with consistent presence, honest words, and quiet connection. Reflection Questions for Your Heart: Have you ever felt grief that didn't “belong” to you, but changed you anyway? What role did you play in a collective loss—neighbor, teacher, nurse, friend? Who have you been meaning to check in on, long after the candles were blown out? What does your community need most right now: another event—or someone who will simply say, “I see you”? A Note from Sharon: If you're hurting for your town, your school, your street, your neighbor—you're grieving. And you deserve space to feel it, too. Let's stop pretending we're okay. Let's stop hiding behind strong. Real grief calls for real community. Let's keep showing up for one another—not just for the funeral, but for the months and years afterward, when it matters most. Listen weekly to Healing Starts with the Heart for truth-filled, compassionate guidance through the hardest parts of grief. Follow Us: Website: healingstartswiththeheart.com Facebook: Healing Starts with the Heart Instagram: @healatthegriefschool TikTok: @thegriefschool Join Us for Ongoing Healing: If you're grieving quietly after a public loss, we see you. You're not invisible. Join Sharon and our team at the next Grief Healing Weekend Intensive—a space for real healing, not just survival. You don't have to carry this alone. Visit clickhereforhope.com for details.

Episode Description: In this raw, heart-opening episode of Healing Starts with the Heart, grief specialist Sharon Brubaker walks you through one of the deepest truths about loss—grief doesn't just take your person. It takes everything. And no one prepares you for that part. With her own story and the stories of thousands of grievers she's supported, Sharon names the unspoken: how grief sneaks in like a thief in the night and strips away your energy, your motivation, your peace, and even your sense of time. This isn't just emotional pain. It's physical, spiritual, mental—and it touches every part of your life. If you've felt like grief broke something in you that you can't get back... this episode will make you feel seen. It's not just you. This is what grief does. But this is also your invitation to take it back—your joy, your identity, your voice, your future. Key Points Discussed: Grief doesn't just take your person— It takes you, the version of you who felt whole before the loss. Energy depletion and physical exhaustion— Why simple tasks like getting out of bed, showering, or doing laundry can feel impossible. Loss of motivation and pleasure— The things you used to love may now feel meaningless or numb. Sleep disruption— Why nights are the hardest and how grief hijacks your ability to rest. Loss of confidence and focus— How grief impacts your ability to think clearly, trust yourself, and feel secure in your identity. The collapse of inner peace— Why your nervous system stays on high alert after your loss. Grief and identity loss— Feeling like a stranger in your own life and questioning your role in the world. Grief takes your voice— The silence we fall into when no one understands our pain or says the right thing. Time distortion— Feeling stuck in the moment of loss while time speeds up or slows down around you. Future grief— Mourning the dreams, milestones, and shared plans that will never happen. Control and patience vanish— How grief can make you feel emotionally raw, snappy, and out of control. The truth no one tells you— Grief may have taken everything... but you can take it back. Journal Questions for Reflection: What's something you've lost that no one talks about? What do you miss most about yourself—the version of you before the loss? Where do you feel most “not like yourself” these days? What's one thing grief made you believe you couldn't reclaim—but maybe you can? Join the Journey: You were not given a life sentence when your person died. You're allowed to reclaim the pieces of your life that grief tried to steal. The healing starts when you stop pretending you're okay, and begin honoring what you've lost—and what you still deserve to feel. Subscribe now to Healing Starts with the Heart for new episodes every Wednesday. You're not alone. You never were. Follow Us: Website: healingstartswiththeheart.com Facebook: Healing Starts with the Heart Instagram: @healatthegriefschool TikTok: @thegriefschool Come to the Healing Weekend Intensive: If this episode spoke to the places in you that feel broken, we invite you to spend the weekend with us. You'll learn how to reclaim your voice, your energy, your identity, and your hope. Click the link below to waitlist in the upcoming Grief Healing Weekend Intensive. We're saving you a seat. https://beacons.ai/thegriefschool