Story Time with Tom & Mike

"I'm Tim the Toolbag Taylor, and I approve this message." Topics include: Linux; Larry King's penis; ice cream fantasies; Clint Howard; Tom does NOT shave his eyebrows; facial tattoos; Tom explains the 'Coyote' thing a little more plainly; Sisyphus; Scientology Cartoon avatars of Tom & Mike created by Gary Bacon: https://twitter.com/pixelbud https://discord.gg/EUH3z6PcJv https://www.tomandmike.com

Tom changes his name. Mike brings very little to the table this week. Topics include: grocery store nazi; the afterlife; Tom invents a game to make mealtime for fun for his niece; very expensive breadsticks; a sad cheat meal; Tom's workout routine; why Tom likes to be called Coyote; Mike makes a move toward career satisfaction  Cartoon avatars of Tom & Mike created by Gary Bacon: https://twitter.com/pixelbud  https://discord.gg/EUH3z6PcJv  https://www.tomandmike.com 

Nobody says no to George. Topics include: being drunk is illegal in heaven; Mike thinks dermatologists are weird; lidocaine allergies and emergency toilet laundry; posture pals; healthy = happy; the Real Jesus; letting go of shit; Mike might be a werewolf; South Park; Mike sees no difference between REO Speedwagon and REM; Star Wars movies and merch; fetishes; AI generated images; vanity sizing; ordering food versus going to pick it up Cartoon avatars of Tom & Mike created by Gary Bacon: https://twitter.com/pixelbud  https://discord.gg/EUH3z6PcJv  https://www.tomandmike.com 

Have an inane question?  Ask ChatGPT! Topics include: do liquids have texture? (no, they do not); do farts propel poop? (yes, they do!); what does urine taste like?; Pink Floyd's Dark Side of the Moon; Tom recieves Chick Tracts from some random stranger via postal mail; Jehovah's Witnesses; childhood friends; Mike performs first aid on a man attacked by a succubus; disappearing eyebrows; AIDS; Spotify;  Cartoon avatars of Tom & Mike created by Gary Bacon: https://twitter.com/pixelbud https://discord.gg/EUH3z6PcJv

With prices like these, we'll do anything for some eggs!  ANYTHING. Topics include: Mike enjoys a snack before the podcast; unnecessary smart devices; eating veggies; videos games; streaming media versus physical media; the cybertruck; the price of eggs; fucking big huge dogs; meth gators; Larry King's many marriages; sunglass fashion; urinal mistakes; a COVID retrospective Cartoon avatars of Tom & Mike created by Gary Bacon: https://twitter.com/pixelbud https://discord.gg/EUH3z6PcJv

Collecting the best of episodes 71 - 73. #ComedyPodcast #FunnyPodcast #PodcastComedy #IrreverentComedy #NSFWComedy #OffColorHumor #WeirdPodcast #ListenNow Cartoon avatars of Tom & Mike created by Gary Bacon: https://twitter.com/pixelbud https://discord.gg/EUH3z6PcJv https://www.tomandmike.com

It's the five year anniversary of our podcast!  Join us as we do almost nothing to celebrate this. Topics include: who makes the the best chocolate?; biting down on coins; why you can't straight up punch a motherfucker anymore; jackass radar; standup comedy; we actually talk about the history of the podcast; eggs and other food; scrote cups; eating bugs; Mike Patton; Happy Gilmore 2; Tom accidentally buys a McDonald's uniform; hash slaves; beer; Mike's plans for upgrading his recording space #ComedyPodcast #FunnyPodcast #PodcastComedy #IrreverentComedy #NSFWComedy #OffColorHumor #WeirdPodcast #ListenNow Cartoon avatars of Tom & Mike created by Gary Bacon: https://twitter.com/pixelbud  https://discord.gg/EUH3z6PcJv  https://www.tomandmike.com  https://www.youtube.com/@gamingwithtommike 

Riiiiiight on it. Topics include: YouTube thinks Tom is a femboy; piss troughs; Japan; Choose Your Own Adventure books; Mike stands up for the dignity of gay people; beer tiers; Mex-Italian fusion cuisine; getting ready for the podcast's five year anniversary; could you handle three days of uninterrupted hiccuping?; scrotumatronics #ComedyPodcast #FunnyPodcast #PodcastComedy #IrreverentComedy #NSFWComedy #OffColorHumor #WeirdPodcast #ListenNow #PissTroughs #ChooseYourOwnAdventure #BeerSnobs #MexItalian #Scrotumatronics #FemboyConfusion Cartoon avatars of Tom & Mike created by Gary Bacon: https://twitter.com/pixelbud  ***************************************************** VISIT OUR OFFICIAL SITE! https://www.tomandmike.com  ***************************************************** Check out our let's play channel, Gaming with Tom & Mike: https://www.youtube.com/@gamingwithtommike 

I FOUND THE MEATLOAF! Topics include: hole in the magnetosphere and the coming pole shift; Mike does not own the prerequisite pants to become the Incredible Hulk; get those shoes signed!; Tom performs a dissertation on Mike's farts; Elevator Game; Tom's army of child super soldiers; what mural would you paint on your house?; what kind of cat are Tom, Mike, and Amber as a collective?; a tasteless, hilarious joke; Mike's new air fryer #podcast #funny #comedy #comedypodcast #magnetosphere #poleshift #IncredibleHulk #farts #giantess #murals #childsoldiers Cartoon avatars of Tom & Mike created by Gary Bacon: https://twitter.com/pixelbud  ***************************************************** VISIT OUR OFFICIAL SITE! https://www.tomandmike.com  ***************************************************** Check out our let's play channel, Gaming with Tom & Mike: https://www.youtube.com/@gamingwithtommike 

That thing about the snapping turtles is totally true, BTW. Topics include: standup comedy; Watching Amy Shumer Until I Laugh; the Hawk Tuah girl is suing people for no reason; Rachael Gunn; degloving your penis; cheese commercials about adult illiteracy; Gwar; Jim Morrison died of snapping turtles; things become heated leading up to and including Song of the Week; Charles Manson; ASMR (Sneaker Sex); Brandon is bootycalled or something by a D-List celebrity See the full Gilbert Gottfried video here: https://youtu.be/4zDf_sKMUeA?si=1P0NPuayQa2PsV9h  #podcast #funny #comedy #comedypodcast #GilbertGottfriedRealVoice #HawkTuahgirl #RachaelGunn #JimMorrison #ASMR #CharlesManson Cartoon avatars of Tom & Mike created by Gary Bacon: https://twitter.com/pixelbud  ***************************************************** VISIT OUR OFFICIAL SITE! https://www.tomandmike.com  ***************************************************** Check out our let's play channel, Gaming with Tom & Mike: https://www.youtube.com/@gamingwithtommike 

It was a cough, I tell you! Topics include: Mike gets really high; Gemini AI goes insane and tells a user to die; our dystopian present and future; vajankles; Reese's Peanut Butter Cunt; Hershey's Chocolate World; what's up with kids running the air conditioning in the dead of winter?; fake it until you do not make it; gingers #podcast #funny #comedy #comedypodcast #weed #stoner #GeminiAI #dystopia #HersheyChocolateWorld #HersheyPark #airconditioning #gingers Cartoon avatars of Tom & Mike created by Gary Bacon: https://twitter.com/pixelbud ***************************************************** VISIT OUR OFFICIAL SITE! https://www.tomandmike.com ***************************************************** Check out our let's play channel, Gaming with Tom & Mike: https://www.youtube.com/@gamingwithtommike

Take your little milk and cookies and get the fuck out of here! Topics include: the Slap Heard 'Round the World; craft candy; various December holidays in 2024; new traditions; put the 'mas; back in Christmas; double butts; Tom bastardizes Christianity again; terrible holiday songs; gift giving, receiving, and insufferable spoiled brats; I'm buying pantyhose for ME!; Kurt Cobain's massive cockarms; lovely foreign insults; Richard Peterson #podcast #funny #comedy #comedypodcast #OrangeCreamsicle #craftcandy #decemberholidays #winterholidays #giftgiving #KurtCobainQuotes #RichardPeterson Cartoon avatars of Tom & Mike created by Gary Bacon: https://twitter.com/pixelbud ***************************************************** VISIT OUR OFFICIAL SITE! https://www.tomandmike.com ***************************************************** Check out our let's play channel, Gaming with Tom & Mike: https://www.youtube.com/@gamingwithtommike

Put on the Meat Suit and deal with it. Topics include: Tom's Philadelphia doppelganger; a truly unique band shirt; Wesley Willis and his headbump bruise; eating Play Doh; Mike Tyson vs. Jake Paul; could you cut your own head off with a chainsaw?; This Old House; evolution and why it doesn't happen in a hundred years; The Meat Suit #podcast #funny #comedy #comedypodcast #painting #doppelganger #bandshirts #WesleyWillis #PlayDoh #MikeTysonVsJakePaul #ThisOldHouse Cartoon avatars of Tom & Mike created by Gary Bacon: https://twitter.com/pixelbud ***************************************************** VISIT OUR OFFICIAL SITE! https://www.tomandmike.com ***************************************************** Check out our let's play channel, Gaming with Tom & Mike: https://www.youtube.com/@gamingwithtommike

Gather 'round folks, and I will sing you the song of my peop - OOH, BUTTERFLY, BUTTERFLY!!! Topics include: Ghost in the Alexa; Jodi Arias; the human race is doomed; Tom's old comic book; Mike reviews the Wendy's Crabby Patty Meal; Indian food; weird band names; tech support; engagement rings; Mike's Tech Tips; Mike is lucky he doesn't get beaten up more often; bicyclists; BMX; ADD; conversion vans #podcast #funny #comedy #comedypodcast #JodiArias #CrabbyPattyMeal #IndianFood #TechSupport #diamonds #EngagmentRings #techtips #bicyclists #BMX Cartoon avatars of Tom & Mike created by Gary Bacon: https://twitter.com/pixelbud  ***************************************************** VISIT OUR OFFICIAL SITE! https://www.tomandmike.com  ***************************************************** Check out our let's play channel, Gaming with Tom & Mike: https://www.youtube.com/@gamingwithtommike   

Sorry, no video again this week!  Audio-only listeners won't notice a difference, but the YouTube viewers will.  We'll be back to normal next episode.  On the plus side, this is a really funny episode. Topics include: Tom has a dream about urethral sounding; Tom says "yeah" a lot; Helen Keller; The Greatest American Hero; Vantablack BMWs?; Jesus "Gets" Us; Garfield is dead; AI is creepy and weird and scary; Bro My God!; snorting cum; what the fuck is going on?; oyster crackers and saltines; Tom flooded a vestibule at Kmart; flannel sheets;  #podcast #funny #comedy #comedypodcast #urethralsounding #HelenKeller #GreatestAmericanHero #vantablack #JesusGetsUs #Garfield #JimDavis #AI #Kmart #flannelsheets Cartoon avatars of Tom & Mike created by Gary Bacon: https://twitter.com/pixelbud  ***************************************************** VISIT OUR OFFICIAL SITE! https://www.tomandmike.com  ***************************************************** Check out our let's play channel, Gaming with Tom & Mike: https://www.youtube.com/@gamingwithtommike 

It's that time again!  Time to get SpOoOoOky! Topics include: Tom's headphones go missing, and then mysteriously reappear; Mike is accosted by an old man because of his shirt; litterboxes in classrooms?; conservatives; what if you get attacked by a Dracula?; movies; phobias; the "Marinara Trench"; is "filmically" a word?; last meals of death row inmates #podcast #funny #comedy #comedypodcast #missingproperty #litterboxesinclassrooms #conservatives #Dracula #phobias #deathrow #lastmeal Cartoon avatars of Tom & Mike created by Gary Bacon: https://twitter.com/pixelbud  ***************************************************** VISIT OUR OFFICIAL SITE! https://www.tomandmike.com  ***************************************************** Check out our let's play channel, Gaming with Tom & Mike: https://www.youtube.com/@gamingwithtommike 

I basically put a red pepper flake in my eye during this episode, and it really, really hurt. Topics include: Guy Fieri; half-assed dopplegangers; time travel; celebrity impersonators; Truth.com ads; dogs; Justin Beiber confronts rude fans; F.A.T.A.L.; mental illness; pepper spray; being out of shape #podcast #funny #comedy #comedypodcast #GuyFieri #dopplegangers #celebrityimpersonators #Justin Beiber #FATALRPG #mentalillness #pepperspray Cartoon avatars of Tom & Mike created by Gary Bacon: https://twitter.com/pixelbud  ***************************************************** VISIT OUR OFFICIAL SITE! https://www.tomandmike.com  ***************************************************** Check out our let's play channel, Gaming with Tom & Mike: https://www.youtube.com/@gamingwithtommike 

Little know fact, FedEx is short for Federation Excelsior. Topics include: we welcome Diz to the Gaming Channel; longing for Thanksgiving; time travel; Would You Rather?; Overrated or Underrated?; generic cars; pranks #podcast #funny #comedy #comedypodcast #Thanksgiving #timetravel #Beatles #tea #vintagesoda #jellopuddingpops #USPS #NewYorkStyle #pranks Diz's YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@Dizaster1995  Diz's Twitch: https://www.twitch.tv/dizasterstudios  Cartoon avatars of Tom & Mike created by Gary Bacon: https://twitter.com/pixelbud  ***************************************************** VISIT OUR OFFICIAL SITE! https://www.tomandmike.com  ***************************************************** Check out our let's play channel, Gaming with Tom & Mike: https://www.youtube.com/@gamingwithtommike 

Mike may be a hobbit, but he's a damned successful one! Topics include: poopy shrimp; sick penis; propaganda; Tom hates sitcoms; Mike visits New Jersey; penile law #podcast #funny #comedy #comedypodcast #FamilyMatters #BigBangTheory #NewJersey #hobbit #FreedomRock #Scientology Cartoon avatars of Tom & Mike created by Gary Bacon: https://twitter.com/pixelbud  ***************************************************** VISIT OUR OFFICIAL SITE! https://www.tomandmike.com  ***************************************************** Check out our let's play channel, Gaming with Tom & Mike: https://www.youtube.com/@gamingwithtommike 

Is it true?  Is the Cybertruck really just an SUV with PS1 graphics? Topics include: the Four Amishmen of the Apocalypse; Thing, The Thing, and John Carpenter's The Thing; unusual sports, real, or invented?; The Walkening; Elon Musk; RFK and his bear #podcast #funny #comedy #comedypodcast #cardboardtubefightingleague #wifecarrying #shovelracing #PoohSticks #FireballSoccer #ChristopherWalken #ElonMusk #RFKbear #SOFTPLAY #WaxFang #FozzyBand Cartoon avatars of Tom & Mike created by Gary Bacon: https://twitter.com/pixelbud  ***************************************************** VISIT OUR OFFICIAL SITE! https://www.tomandmike.com  ***************************************************** Check out our let's play channel, Gaming with Tom & Mike: https://www.youtube.com/@gamingwithtommike 

Join us as we explore the world of AI-generated music, the definition of Shoegaze, drinking hard liquor as a substitute for water, and more! Topics include: Mike is repairing and restoring a guitar, this song of the week brought to you by AI (Suno); should cover songs stay true to the original, or be reinterpretations of the original?; the definition of Shoegaze; Tom's beach trip; a cowboy's drink of choice; Steve Buscemi; the way creative people think; reality tunnels; space exploration; sex toy or obscure comic book character?;  Check out jackdeth's song, Summer Party Song, and others at https://suno.com/@jackdeth  Tom's music can be found at https://suno.com/@system_of_a_clown  Watch us play Goat Simulator here: https://youtu.be/xNLksPfqnEE  Watch us play Human Fall Flat here: https://youtu.be/ZhYE0c43jPw  #podcast #comedy #comedypodcast #guitarrepair #guitarrestoration #AImusic #Suno #coversongs #shoegaze #SteveBuscemi #creativity #realitytunnels #RobertAntonWilson #sextoys #comics Cartoon avatars of Tom & Mike created by Gary Bacon: https://twitter.com/pixelbud  ***************************************************** VISIT OUR OFFICIAL SITE! https://www.tomandmike.com  ***************************************************** Check out our let's play channel, Gaming with Tom & Mike: https://www.youtube.com/@gamingwithtommike 

Feeling nostalgic?  So are we! Topics include: Tom is sometimes ashamed of his own podcast; summer games we played as kids; young Tom was a bully; terrible bathroom stories; Mad Magazine; 80's and 90's toys #podcast #funny #comedy #comedypodcast #GhostsInTheGraveyard #TVTag #Photon #Lasertag #HordakSlimePit #Crossfire #Pogoball #Spytech #bullying Cartoon avatars of Tom & Mike created by Gary Bacon: https://twitter.com/pixelbud ***************************************************** VISIT OUR OFFICIAL SITE! https://www.tomandmike.com ***************************************************** Check out our let's play channel, Gaming with Tom & Mike: https://www.youtube.com/@gamingwithtommike

Ambers joins us once again, with an armful of quizzes and her special type of positivity. Topics include: generic candy; proper bong usage; dong ia a funny word; a shitty Willy Wonka exhibit; Ben Schwartz's improv tour; fake news vs real news; a quiz about fried foods; a quiz about Pride month #podcast #funny #comedy #comedypodcast #genericcandy #bong #dong #WillyWonka #WillyWonkaExhibit #BenSchwartz #fakenews #friedfood #summer #pride Cartoon avatars of Tom & Mike created by Gary Bacon: https://twitter.com/pixelbud  ***************************************************** VISIT OUR OFFICIAL SITE! https://www.tomandmike.com  ***************************************************** Check out our let's play channel, Gaming with Tom & Mike: https://www.youtube.com/@gamingwithtommike 

This week's episode was brought to you by Crappy Equipment!  We were able to record on our phones, but because of this, I wasn't given a video feed with both our faces on it at the same time.  The cuts were all automatically done by Zoom upon converting the file, so they look like shit.  Also, it sounds like shit, for multiple reasons.  On the plus side, this is the easiest edit I've had to do in years. Topics include: Mike's computer breaks, and so does Tom's ashtray, although these things are not directly related; Fallout 76; The Mighty Boosh; Tom describes a kind of time travel that could be created using a copy of the album Incense and Peppermints by Strawberry Alarm Clock and a good tube amp; what constitutes a musical supergroup?; looking at porn at work; Tom's POS NCO;  #podcast #funny #comedy #comedypodcast #Fallout76 #MightyBoosh #JulianBarrett #NoelFielding #RichFulcher #MattBerry  #StrawberryAlarmClock Cartoon avatars of Tom & Mike created by Gary Bacon: https://twitter.com/pixelbud  ***************************************************** VISIT OUR OFFICIAL SITE! https://www.tomandmike.com  ***************************************************** Check out our let's play channel, Gaming with Tom & Mike: https://www.youtube.com/@gamingwithtommike 

Andy the Squirrel teaches Mike a thing or two about life as a city squirrel. Topics include: baseball caps; keeping toys in the packaging; bespoke action figures; secret peeing; phantom pooping techniques; a visit from Andy P. Squirrel; movie plot mashups; #podcast #funny #comedy #comedypodcast #AndyPSquirrel #baseballcaps #collectabletoys #actionfigures  #movieplotmashup Cartoon avatars of Tom & Mike created by Gary Bacon: https://twitter.com/pixelbud  ***************************************************** VISIT OUR OFFICIAL SITE! https://www.tomandmike.com  ***************************************************** Check out our let's play channel, Gaming with Tom & Mike: https://www.youtube.com/@gamingwithtommike 

Mike seriously did take a butter bath, don't let him try to tell you otherwise. Topics include: alcoholic slushies; Tom has dental work done; Mike's oldest daughter graduates from college; a visit from Dr. Phill McDraw; the real Dr. Phil and his stuntmen buddies; Minor League Baseball team names; Marilyn Manson with a mullet; beer #podcast #funny #comedy #comedypodcast #DrPhil #DrPhilparody #dentists #MinorLeagueBaseball #MarilynManson #beer Cartoon avatars of Tom & Mike created by Gary Bacon: https://twitter.com/pixelbud  ***************************************************** VISIT OUR OFFICIAL SITE! https://www.tomandmike.com  ***************************************************** Check out our let's play channel, Gaming with Tom & Mike: https://www.youtube.com/@gamingwithtommike 

Nothing like the indignity of being bitten in the head to add to the general bullshit of gym class. Topics include: the Pure Moods CD; Smashmouth; Fallout TV show; reading; dog problems; head bites and other gym class activities; beer; the time astronaut John Young smuggled a sandwich into space; who Tweeted it, Kevin Sorbo, Rob Schneider, or Randy Quaid?; the dark web #podcast #funny #comedy #comedypodcast #PureMoods #Smashmouth #FalloutTVshow #reading #beer #JohnYoungastronaut #KevinSorbo #RobSchneider #Randy Quaid? #darkweb Cartoon avatars of Tom & Mike created by Gary Bacon: https://twitter.com/pixelbud  ***************************************************** VISIT OUR OFFICIAL SITE! https://www.tomandmike.com  ***************************************************** Check out our let's play channel, Gaming with Tom & Mike: https://www.youtube.com/@gamingwithtommike 

Because who doesn't need another phobia? Topics include: novelty t-shirts; inflammatory bumper stickers; skin tags; name brands versus generic brands; kangaroo meat; toilet snakes; Amazon Safari; Nair on balls and other bad ideas; Andy Dick; Fallout TV show #podcast #funny #comedy #comedypodcast #noveltytshirts #bumperstickers #skintags #namebrands #toiletsnake #Amazonreviews #Nair #AndyDick #Fallout #FalloutShow #WaltonGoggins Cartoon avatars of Tom & Mike created by Gary Bacon: https://twitter.com/pixelbud  ***************************************************** VISIT OUR OFFICIAL SITE! https://www.tomandmike.com  ***************************************************** Check out our let's play channel, Gaming with Tom & Mike: https://www.youtube.com/@gamingwithtommike 

It's kind of like a combination of acupuncture and arts & crafts! Topics include: what constitutes a sauce?; Gripe Water; social media pranksters; Boomer thinks selling illegal immigrants is a good idea; school official nearly loses job in AI framejob; voting eligibility limitations; Trump the Idiot God King; freckle networking; Joe Kenda #podcast #funny #comedy #comedypodcast #sauce #GripeWater #pranks #boomer #immigration #AI #chatGPT #voting #Trump #JoeKenda Cartoon avatars of Tom & Mike created by Gary Bacon: https://twitter.com/pixelbud  ***************************************************** VISIT OUR OFFICIAL SITE! https://www.tomandmike.com  ***************************************************** Check out our let's play channel, Gaming with Tom & Mike: https://www.youtube.com/@gamingwithtommike 

The question is not, should I buy one of those things with the camera on them that you can stick into your ear; the question is, can I stick it in my pee hole? Topics include: birds of prey; getting old; eye-to-dick coordination; the 2024 solar eclipse; drinking; Caitlyn Jenner; earwax cameras;  #podcast #funny #comedy #comedypodcast #eagles #birdsofprey #aging #gettingold #2024eclipse #OJSimpson #CaitlynJenner #earwaxcameras Cartoon avatars of Tom & Mike created by Gary Bacon: https://twitter.com/pixelbud  ***************************************************** VISIT OUR OFFICIAL SITE! https://www.tomandmike.com  ***************************************************** Check out our let's play channel, Gaming with Tom & Mike: https://www.youtube.com/@gamingwithtommike 

I can't even get a decent 5G signal up here!!! Topics include: was Jesus a zombie or a lich?; aliens and space travel; was Bob Ross a serial killer?; Ferris Bueller's Day Off; Reginald Vel Johnson; separating the art from the artist; Paul Blart Mall Cop 2; Dan Schneider and the plight of child actors; remaking bad movines into good ones; Nicholas Cage #podcast #funny #comedy #comedypodcast #Jesuslich #extraterrestrials #interstellartravel #BobRoss #BobRossserialkiller #FerrisBuellersDayOff #ReginaldVelJohnson #DanSchneider #NicholasCage Cartoon avatars of Tom & Mike created by Gary Bacon: https://twitter.com/pixelbud  ***************************************************** VISIT OUR OFFICIAL SITE! https://www.tomandmike.com  ***************************************************** Check out our let's play channel, Gaming with Tom & Mike: https://www.youtube.com/@gamingwithtommike 

Mike looks like Goldilocks in this episode.  If you're only listening to the podcast, you obviously won't see that, but if you're watching it on YouTube, maybe it'll distract the fuck out of you like it did Tom. Topics include: names for toes; sexual feng shui; Andrew Tate; playing a didgeridoo; cats #podcast #funny #comedy #comedypodcast #AndrewTate #didgeridoo Cartoon avatars of Tom & Mike created by Gary Bacon: https://twitter.com/pixelbud  ***************************************************** VISIT OUR OFFICIAL SITE! https://www.tomandmike.com  ***************************************************** Check out our let's play channel, Gaming with Tom & Mike: https://www.youtube.com/@gamingwithtommike 

"Funny, kinda heavy, and then adorable." Mike's take on this week's episode. Topics include: various types of pudding; dukage; MIMAL; Vermin Supreme; Steven Seagal; some dude creepin' on Mike's steeze; thorazine dick; stone soup; AI; conservative family moves to Russia and immediately regret it; Tucker Carlson/Putin interview; Jon Stewart; a dose of cuteness #podcast #funny #comedy #comedypodcast #pudding #MIMAL #VerminSupreme #StevenSeagal #TuckerCarlson #JonStewart Cartoon avatars of Tom & Mike created by Gary Bacon: https://twitter.com/pixelbud ***************************************************** VISIT OUR OFFICIAL SITE! https://www.tomandmike.com ***************************************************** Check out our let's play channel, Gaming with Tom & Mike: https://www.youtube.com/@gamingwithtommike

Hey!!!  I was listening to that AM radio station! Topics include: Smurf porn; internet smack talk; thanks, I'm cured!; Valentines Day; we get locked into a food spiral; Lego Masters and other Nerd Artisans; Red Dwarf; fishboots; thieves steal 200 foot radio tower that was actively transmitting in AM;  #podcast #funny #comedy #comedypodcast #smurfporn #valentinesday #LegoMasters #RedDwarf #thievesstealradiotower Cartoon avatars of Tom & Mike created by Gary Bacon: https://twitter.com/pixelbud ***************************************************** VISIT OUR OFFICIAL SITE! https://www.tomandmike.com ***************************************************** Check out our let's play channel, Gaming with Tom & Mike: https://www.youtube.com/@gamingwithtommike

Have you ever eaten a Slimehead?  What about a Whore Egg? Topics include: Richards Simmons shrunk down into jerky; One Girl, One Brownie Recipe; peak dad; the Slimehead Family; Fairuza Balk's juicy center; #podcast #funny #comedy #comedypodcast #RoyalJester #RichardSimmons #poopbrownies #dadjokes #slimehead #orangeroughy #FairuzaBalk Cartoon avatars of Tom & Mike created by Gary Bacon: https://twitter.com/pixelbud ***************************************************** VISIT OUR OFFICIAL SITE! https://www.tomandmike.com ***************************************************** Check out our let's play channel, Gaming with Tom & Mike: https://www.youtube.com/@gamingwithtommike

We've had technical difficulties before, but this was the first time we've had to record the end of the podcast on another day. Topics include: Tom goes to a Tool concert; two bags of shoes; what do trenchcoats remind you of?; Hunter S. Thompson sightings; the Balldo; ripped Grimace; haunted smart devices; Deobra Reddie; Two Truths and a Lie; some dude pissed in Mike's front yard #podcast #funny #comedy #comedypodcast #Tool #ToolBand #clothingtheft #trenchcoat #HunterSThompson #Balldo #Grimace #DeobraRedden #TwoTruthsAndALie Cartoon avatars of Tom & Mike created by Gary Bacon: https://twitter.com/pixelbud ***************************************************** VISIT OUR OFFICIAL SITE! https://www.tomandmike.com ***************************************************** Check out our let's play channel, Gaming with Tom & Mike: https://www.youtube.com/@gamingwithtommike

It's a new year, and that means the same old bullshit! Topics include: Mike get sick and temporarily gains a superpower; the January gym rush; bad movies and good television; beating bad habits; Pre Malone; Only Fans trash; Don Cheadle as Captain Planet; Crisco kisses #podcast #funny #comedy #comedypodcast #januarygymrush #badhabits #postmalone #onlyfans Cartoon avatars of Tom & Mike created by Gary Bacon: https://twitter.com/pixelbud  ***************************************************** VISIT OUR OFFICIAL SITE! https://www.tomandmike.com  ***************************************************** Check out our let's play channel, Gaming with Tom & Mike: https://www.youtube.com/@gamingwithtommike 

Collecting episodes 68 through 70. Bits and segments included: Grundle Tales; Human Blunderbuss; Butt Plugs are for Everyone; Desiccated Plums; Preheating a Microwave; Must Be a Lie; Jimmy Horrible; Brown; The Funk; "Yeah, right!"; I Don't Need Your Fucking Charity; The Rootin', Tootinest Lawyer in the West; Mike's Spy Cam Network; Bingo Gang; Barn Squirrels 'n' Chimney Bats!; Vampire Pussy #podcast #funny #comedy #comedypodcast #bestof Cartoon avatars of Tom & Mike created by Gary Bacon: https://twitter.com/pixelbud  ***************************************************** VISIT OUR OFFICIAL SITE! https://www.tomandmike.com  ***************************************************** Check out our let's play channel, Gaming with Tom & Mike: https://www.youtube.com/@gamingwithtommike 

Its that time again! BE SURE TO JOIN US ON NEW YEAR'S EVE AT 11 PM EASTERN STANDARD TIME AS WE STREAM LIVE FROM GAMING WITH TOM & MIKE: https://www.youtube.com/live/1uAS6VXF0PM?si=_TLhw5xAJUuV7KfL  Topics include: holiday equity; Santa is more plausible than Jesus; Santa whupped a dude's ass; favorite Christmas memories; weight loss; wearing cologne at the gym; Nickelback likes your feet; what if Santa peed in Frosty's puddle?; Santa's eternal torment; ripping on the Amish yet again; apes are strong #podcast #funny #comedy #comedypodcast #Santa #Jesus #ChristmasMemories #weightloss #Nickelback #Amish Cartoon avatars of Tom & Mike created by Gary Bacon: https://twitter.com/pixelbud  ***************************************************** VISIT OUR OFFICIAL SITE! https://www.tomandmike.com  ***************************************************** Check out our let's play channel, Gaming with Tom & Mike: https://www.youtube.com/@gamingwithtommike 

Tom gets very drunk on Mad Elf. Topics include: that Folger's commercial... you know, THAT one; pet stories; analog kids in a digital age; the in's and out's of being a bald person; Masons #podcast #funny #comedy #comedypodcast #thatfolgerscommercial #pets #masons Cartoon avatars of Tom & Mike created by Gary Bacon: https://twitter.com/pixelbud  ***************************************************** VISIT OUR OFFICIAL SITE! https://www.tomandmike.com  ***************************************************** Check out our let's play channel, Gaming with Tom & Mike: https://www.youtube.com/@gamingwithtommike 

He stood there, his mustache resplendent, his red hot member waving madly in the air.  And then somebody shot him.  It was fucked. Topics include: vitamin C dreams; deli adventures; the resurgence of DVD players; steroid use; Deadwood; having a cool jean jacket; cashing that paycheck;  #podcast #funny #comedy #comedypodcast #vitaminc #dvdplayer #steroids #deadwood #nickofferman #jeanjackets #paycheck #IRONREAGAN #AllTheSaints #ProfessorElemental #AldoNova Cartoon avatars of Tom & Mike created by Gary Bacon: https://twitter.com/pixelbud  ***************************************************** VISIT OUR OFFICIAL SITE! https://www.tomandmike.com  ***************************************************** Check out our let's play channel, Gaming with Tom & Mike: https://www.youtube.com/@gamingwithtommike 

Due to a serious equipment failure, the podcast will be on break for awhile.  I'll be posting updates whenever possible.

This episode originally featured an argument which wasn't funny enough to keep.  There are undercurrents of it throughout the episode, see if you can guess what it was about! Topics include: Dr. Pimple Popper; Gilbert Gottfried's real voice (legitimate source); huggist; somebody farts on Mike for a change; a lotta work for not a lotta meat; choking on fish bones; the Five Nights at Freddy's movie; Tom's comedy rage; what does 'woke' mean?; Thanksgiving and Christmas decorations; Mike explains embroidery; Big Nose George #podcast #funny #comedy #comedypodcast #drpimplepopper #gilbertgottfried #fivenightsatfreddys #embroidery #bignosegeorge #ChicksOnSpeed #AlienWeaponry Cartoon avatars of Tom & Mike created by Gary Bacon: https://twitter.com/pixelbud  ***************************************************** VISIT OUR OFFICIAL SITE! https://www.tomandmike.com  ***************************************************** Check out our let's play channel, Gaming with Tom & Mike: https://www.youtube.com/@gamingwithtommike 

We completely lose our shit and start talking about anally inserted butts. Listen to Mike and Brandon's new podcast, Milkin' It, here: https://www.spreaker.com/episode/57417524  Topics include: Mike is accosted my Laura Engels era maidens at a Les Claypool show; cheesesteak/cheese stick/cheese snake/cheesedick; Milkin' It; the proper pronunciation of "tour"; Jeffery; birds with boobie names; grocery store hijinks; chugging honey; Don't be a bird, bro, or you'll have a short life; You scream, I scream; butt docking; school fundraising; radioactive Chinese food;  #podcast #funny #comedy #comedypodcast #MichaelStipe #NatalieMerchant #EddieCochran #AtTheDriveIn #birds #iwalkedbobdylanonstage #schoolfundraising Cartoon avatars of Tom & Mike created by Gary Bacon: https://twitter.com/pixelbud  ***************************************************** VISIT OUR OFFICIAL SITE! https://www.tomandmike.com  ***************************************************** Check out our let's play channel, Gaming with Tom & Mike: https://www.youtube.com/@gamingwithtommike 

Mike relentlessly farts his way through life and refuses to apologize for it any longer.  Meanwhile, Tom wants to do away with the need to dispose of bodily waste. Topics include: Ten Years After; Static-X; Tom takes his nephew to his first show; going back to the gym; New Game Plus IRL; pork at work; Yuengling Lager is overrated; sports fans; A Nightmare Before Christmas; Jared Fogel; what if Chris Hansen turned out to be a predator?; Mad Magazine paperbacks; magazines #podcast #funny #comedy #comedypodcast #TenYearsAfter #StaticX #gym #NewGamePlus #YuenglingLager #sportsfans #NightmareBeforeChristmas #JaredFogel #ChrisHansen #MadMagazine #magazines Cartoon avatars of Tom & Mike created by Gary Bacon: https://twitter.com/pixelbud  ***************************************************** VISIT OUR OFFICIAL SITE! https://www.tomandmike.com  ***************************************************** Check out our let's play channel, Gaming with Tom & Mike: https://www.youtube.com/@gamingwithtommike 

We tried.  We really did.  But we just can't keep on topic long enough to be properly SpOoKy! We would like to dedicate this episode to the memory of Rodrigo Moro.  Rest in Peace, buddy. Topics include: is gore considered horror?; trick or treating in the 80s versus today; mental health meals; once you become a ghost, you gotta answer to other ghosts for shit they saw you do; grow your own tobacco; the closet of no return; House of Leaves; dreams in the witch apartment; dreams; drawing boobs in school; church; we didn't do an improv; Giant Antarctic Cryptid Spiders; Artie Shaw; Memotone; Fallout lore and the Demon Core #podcast #funny #comedy #comedypodcast #Halloween #trickortreat #ghosts #tobacco #creepycloset #HouseOfLeaves #witch #dreams #church #AntarcticCryptid Cartoon avatars of Tom & Mike created by Gary Bacon: https://twitter.com/pixelbud  Spooky Ride by Twin Musicom is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 license. https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/  Source: http://www.twinmusicom.org/song/250/spooky-ride  Artist: http://www.twinmusicom.org  ***************************************************** VISIT OUR OFFICIAL SITE! https://www.tomandmike.com  ***************************************************** Check out our let's play channel, Gaming with Tom & Mike: https://www.youtube.com/@gamingwithtommike 

Who knew the Amish were such a rich vein of comedy? Topics include: Trivium; Taylor Swift; Tom's resolution: more rock tees, tats, and shows; Beeker is a huge pervert; fantostomy bag; Are Tacos Sandwiches? - An Improv Sketch; cereal + milk = soup?; a definition for Walking Taco; The Amish Dick Punch #podcast #funny #comedy #comedypodcast #Trivium #TaylorSwift #rockshows #rocktees #tattoos #tacos #AreTacosSandwiches #Amish Cartoon avatars of Tom & Mike created by Gary Bacon: https://twitter.com/pixelbud  ***************************************************** VISIT OUR OFFICIAL SITE! https://www.tomandmike.com  ***************************************************** Check out our let's play channel, Gaming with Tom & Mike: https://www.youtube.com/@gamingwithtommike 

After two wholesome episodes in a row, I guess we needed to get some of the nasty out, because right out of the gate we're like 120 miles an hour with the toilet humor. You love it. Topics include: piss reduction; poop schedules; McDonalds; working at Hardee's; Boris (an improv game); The Hu; Death From Above 1979; guitars; Halloween decorations; EMP gun; No Pants Dance Off #podcast #funny #comedy #comedypodcast #poop #pooping #McDonalds #Hardees #BorisImprov #TheHu #DeathFromAbove1979 #guitars #HalloweenDecorations #NoPantsDanceOff Cartoon avatars of Tom & Mike created by Gary Bacon: https://twitter.com/pixelbud  ***************************************************** VISIT OUR OFFICIAL SITE! https://www.tomandmike.com  ***************************************************** Check out our let's play channel, Gaming with Tom & Mike: https://www.youtube.com/@gamingwithtommike 

In this super-long travelogue, Tom's nephew tells of his visit to Japan.  It's a tale of daring, adventure, and an astonishing lack of self-preservation. #podcast #funny #comedy #comedypodcast #Japan #travel #travelogue #exploration #comingofage #JohnHughes Cartoon avatars of Tom & Mike created by Gary Bacon: https://twitter.com/pixelbud ***************************************************** VISIT OUR OFFICIAL SITE! https://www.tomandmike.com ***************************************************** Check out our let's play channel, Gaming with Tom & Mike: https://www.youtube.com/@gamingwithtommike

Something is off, here, Mike... did you get a haircut or something? Topics include: Steve Harvey; the Wheel of Fortune PS4 game; RIP Bob Barker; Starfield; Baldur's Gate 3; concerts; Suicidal Tendencies; Danzig is a terrible homeowner; sleep studies; car salesmen; who would win in a fight, Tom or Mike? #podcast #funny #comedy #comedypodcast #SteveHarvey #WheelofFortune #BobBarker #Starfield #BaldursGate3 #BG3 #concerts #Suicidal Tendencies #DanzigHomeowner #sleepstudy #carsalemen Cartoon avatars of Tom & Mike created by Gary Bacon: https://twitter.com/pixelbud  ***************************************************** VISIT OUR OFFICIAL SITE! https://www.tomandmike.com  ***************************************************** Check out our let's play channel, Gaming with Tom & Mike: https://www.youtube.com/@gamingwithtommike 

It's not what you're thinking.  Probably. Topics include: repulsively sweet tea; boiled peanuts; Tom introduces his niece to D&D; comics; shitty celebrities; hot weather; Tom's Army days; too much sugar; more Army stuff; Dave Matthews; weed shits?; superheroes; Tom's cat Simon is also a soda douche #podcast #funny #comedy #comedypodcast #sweettea #boiledpeanuts #D&D #comics #DaveMatthews #Armystories Cartoon avatars of Tom & Mike created by Gary Bacon: https://twitter.com/pixelbud  ***************************************************** VISIT OUR OFFICIAL SITE! https://www.tomandmike.com  ***************************************************** Check out our let's play channel, Gaming with Tom & Mike: https://www.youtube.com/@gamingwithtommike