Mating Matters

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Dr. Wendy Walsh uses science, personal interviews and pop culture to reveal that mating strategy is the secret evolutionary motivation for most every human behavior. Let’s face it, we are wired to reproduce. So powerful is this instinct that it has secretly embedded itself in almost every human beha…

iHeartMedia


    • Sep 1, 2021 LATEST EPISODE
    • infrequent NEW EPISODES
    • 25m AVG DURATION
    • 53 EPISODES

    4.7 from 275 ratings Listeners of Mating Matters that love the show mention: wendy walsh, mating matters, science behind, evolution, behavior, backed, sexual, relationships, humans, informational, female, research, educational, subject, fascinating, facts, based, informative, learning, interesting.



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    Latest episodes from Mating Matters

    Mating Matters Farewell Brooke. BIG Announcement

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 1, 2021 19:27


    Fantasies and Fetishes

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 23, 2020 37:05


    NOTE: This episode contains some adult discussion which includes topics of sexual assault and abuse.Have you ever wondered about the secret and sometimes dark world of a human's "special" desires? Dr. Wendy asks Kinsey Institute's Dr. Justin Lehmiller if scientists have discovered an evolutionary basis for our fantasy worlds and fetishes. Oh, yeah, and a whole lot more!Lehmiller is a social psychologist and the author of "Tell Me What You Want: The Science of Sexual Desire and How It Can Help You Improve Your Sex Life." His writing can also be found at sexandpsychology.comContact Dr. Wendy and Mating Matters at matingmatters@iheartmedia.com or (323) 207-8277.If you feel like you need to talk to someone about sexual assault or abuse, call the RAINN Abuse Hotline: 800-656-HOPE (4673)

    Casual Sex, Attachment and Our...Strange...Sex Ed

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 25, 2020 19:31


    Dr. Wendy is hard at work on an episode called Fantasies and Fetishes where she talks to sex researcher Justin Lehmiller from the world famous Kinsey Institute. That episode is coming soon, but in the meantime there was a lot more they talked about that was too good to hoard, like his research on "friends with benefits" and the US' super lackluster sex education policy. No wonder porn is so popular, he says! Dr. Wendy also adds some other studies to the mix.But really, what Dr. Wendy wants is for you to call our Mating Matters message line (323-207-8277) or email us a voice memo (matingmatters@iheartmedia.com) to tell her what you fantasize about or have a special "attachment" to -- i.e. fetish. Names are confidential. Talk to us!

    An Alpha's Evolution

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 11, 2020 24:21


    In this special episode, we catch up with our promiscuous alpha Dr. Wendy spoke to in season one. Our listener first contacted us because he was at a crossroads. At the age of 24 he guessed he'd had about 200 sex partners. But the birth of his little girl really got him thinking about what he truly wants in life and love. We find out if an alpha can really change his ways.Contact us by email or voice memo at matingmatters@iheartmedia.com or leave a message at 323-207-8277. We'd love to hear from you!

    Accidental Incest - A Familial Phenomenon

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 28, 2020 46:08


    WARNING: this episode contains discussion and stories regarding genetic sexual attraction, incest and sexual abuse. Genetic Sexual Attraction is a phenomenon. It requires a certain combination of events for it to be triggered in estranged family members, but when it hits it hits HARD. People who have experienced GSA have described at as OVERWHELMING, POWERFUL, ADDICTIVE, and the DEEPEST LOVE.Thank you to our two incredible guests who were so brave and honest when they spoke with us about their personal experience. For more information on genetic sexual attraction, go to https://thegsaforum.com/.RAINN National Sexual Assault Hotline is 1-800-656-HOPE. This nationwide partnership provides victims of sexual assault with free, confidential services around the clock.

    Precocious Puberty

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 14, 2020 33:23


    How old were you when you started puberty? Most people will say somewhere between 10-15. There is a smaller percentage of people, though, who will experience those physical and hormonal changes earlier, in some cases MUCH earlier. Ladies, can you imagine starting your period when you were seven years old? Dr. Wendy talks with the endocrinologist who literally wrote the textbook on precocious puberty and a few people who have experienced this rare condition personally or as a parent. Questions? Thoughts? Call the Mating Matters message line at (323) 207-8277 or send a voice memo to matingmatters@iheartmedia.com.

    Mating Messages: Questions From Quarantine

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 30, 2020 19:35


    [EPISODE NOTE: Question two is regarding pedophilia.] Dr. Wendy answers questions from our listeners while we've all been on some level of lockdown. Thanks to all of our dedicated listeners who have called our message line at (323) 207-8277 or emailed us voice memos at matingmatters@iheartmedia.com. Keep them coming!

    The Trouble With Testosterone 2.0 - With Brooks Laich

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 9, 2020 35:27


    This episode is an oldie but a bestie. As a special treat to fluff it up, though, Dr. Wendy talks to former hockey player Brooks Laich about, well, his testosterone. He is surprisingly open about how being a professional athlete could affect falling in love. Plus the show: how this powerful little hormone affects so much of a man's behavior and personality. Women, did you know you can increase his testosterone level any time you want?

    Racy Relations

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 17, 2020 17:40


    Dr. Wendy Walsh digs deeper into a major surface issue - skin color. Where does racism come from? Did racism evolve in homosapiens or is it something humans develop within their lifespan? She also points out important things to be aware of as you navigate the world or have kids of your own like implicit bias and how dating apps could be reinforcing racism as we search for love. Dr. Wendy also talks about the one group of people least likely to ever marry - not because they don't want to, but because life has gotten particularly complicated for them.Call our Mating Matters Message Line at 323-207-8277 or leave an email or voice memo at matingmatters@iheartmedia.com with any questions, comments or desires for future episodes.

    Quarantine Edition

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 23, 2020 31:42


    In this Quarantine Episode of Mating Matters, Dr. Wendy touches on all kinds of tools and tips for people stuck at home with one person or with no person - or too many persons! Let give each other a break right now, and especially ourselves. Adversity does NOT "reveal character" it only reveals the coping strategy a person might have in crazy times, which he or she may come by honestly. She also goes over the three main ways our psychological immune system is trying to help us through this crazy time. Oh, have you been thinking of contacting an old flame? More on that!

    Women's Intelligent Bodies with Dr. Cindy Meston

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 5, 2020 41:16


    Dr. Cindy Meston is a clinical psychologist and professor at the University of Texas at Austin. She is also the director of the Sexual Psychophysiology Laboratory there. She may be best known for her research on the female orgasm, but she says her primary research interest is sexual arousal. You know, without arousal not much else happens.You first heard her in our Mating Matters episode called "Why Women Have Sex." In this conversation Dr. Meston talks about the preparation hypothesis, something called “desynchrony,” why a sexual contract between two people is often successful, and where the heck the pink Viagra is for women. She also tells us the number one sexual complaint in America. Basically, Dr. Cindy Meston talks to us about women’s intelligent bodies.Please be aware there is discussion regarding sexual assault, rape and a woman’s physical protection response...sometimes including involuntary orgasm. The discussions begin around 11:30 and 29:30. Both last about a minute.Call the Mating Matters message line: 323-207-8277 with a thought, question or comment.

    Mating Message: Daddy Issues

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 5, 2020 15:18


    Girls with Daddy Issues. Boys with Mommy issues. Dr. Wendy answers a listener's question from our message line! Our relationships with our parents is a key ingredient of how we form attachments as adults. There are a few ways we deal with the abandonment, neglect or smothering we felt as children and no gender is immune.Have a question for Dr. Wendy? Call 323-207-8277Further relevant listening: What Is Love?, Mothers, MILFs & Wives.

    Quickie: Peace Be Of You

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 29, 2020 17:18


    Turns out homo sapiens are built for peace, calm and equality. That's right. Our most natural state is peaceful. There actually was very little fighting among bands of hunter-gatherers, and only then when they felt there was no other choice, like when the Spaniards or British appeared with their weapons. The happiest couples and the most cooperative kids develop from a sense of autonomy, equality, and play...and they are at peace.Mating Matters Message Line: 323-207-8277 - We are currently looking for grandmothers. Are your grandchildren a part of your weekly life or do they live across the country? How much or little have you been involved in raising or supporting your g-kids?

    Quickie: Mating Strategies and Fatherhood

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 22, 2020 22:35


    Dr. Wendy loves her research, but sometimes some of the best stuff doesn't fit neatly in to one of our Mating Matters episodes. In this Quickie, she looks at some of the latest findings in evolutionary psychology and anthropology and shares the gems. She talks about mating strategies of women and men, including how men will often use PDF's (public displays of fatherhood) as one way of impressing women and why less sex after having a baby is NOT a sign of trouble. In fact, it's just the opposite. This episode is JAM packed with interesting things learned from modern day hunter-gatherers.Mating Matters message line: 323-207-8277.

    Royal Hunter Gatherers

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 15, 2020 17:01


    The world has been abuzz with the "shocking" news that England's Prince Harry and wife Meghan Markle are turning in their keys to the kingdom. First, this shouldn't be shocking to anyone. There've been rumblings of discord and discontent for several months. Dr. Wendy is here to explain how this all actually makes perfect evolutionary sense. On one hand they're doing what our hunter-gatherer ancestors did. On the other hand they are also living on the forefront of the evolution of marriage itself. Marriage is no longer about social survival or strict gender roles. A modern marriage is way more than that. Harry and Meghan are living a thoroughly modern marriage.Mating Matters Message Line: 323-207-8277

    BEHIND THE MINDS: Dr. Darryl Gwynne

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 8, 2020 31:26


    BEHIND THE MINDS is a series in Mating Matters that opens up our expert interviews to anyone who is sciencey and nerdy and curious enough to want to hear it all! Want to know more? Here it is. Darryl Gwynne, PhD, was the charming expert you heard in "Pornography Mindf**k." Remember the beetles falling hard for the beer bottles? That's him. He's a professor of biology at the University of Toronto at Mississauga. His research is mainly about sexual selection and trying to understand the evolution of sex differences and behavior. Of course, there's a twist. His primary test subjects are insects, but, hey, we're not so different. No, really... Enjoy!Mating Matters Message line is (323) 207-8277. Feel like connecting? Do it!

    Funny Is for Foreplay

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 18, 2019 34:51


    We know that laughter is good for our health. It lowers stress hormones which helps our immune system work better. But is this why a sense of humor evolved in humans? Not totally. Turns out humor has been of primo importance in our natural and sexual selection. On this episode, we explore the science of comedy and why women can't seem to say no to a funny mate.Basically, if you want to woo a woman, work on your wit and word play.Mating Matters message line: 323-207-8277

    The Slower Road to Love

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 11, 2019 30:56


    Love and attachment may come in stages, phases and flavors. Love relationships may involve sex, affection, emotional intimacy, commitment, public displays of love or private trysts. But the order of those stages is changing. If you’re over 40, fasten your seat belts folks, because Millennials are showing us how our anthropological ancestors sampled from the smorgasbord of human relationships, all in the name of good reproductive choices.Questions? Thoughts? Experiences? Call the Mating Matters message line: 323-207-8277

    Quickie: The New Double Standard

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 4, 2019 15:27


    Dr. Wendy opened her Facebook page to discover a question posed to her that really rubbed her wrong. Who says modern women still have to live up to some sexual moral code created by society hundreds of years ago? The double standard is that thing that says men get points for sexual experience, but women get judged for it. These are new days and with equality comes freedom.Have a question, thought or experience you'd like to share? Call the Mating Matters message line: 323-207-8277!

    Quickie: 10 Tips for Better Relationships

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 27, 2019 12:49


    Mating Matters is all about the evolution of human mating and mating strategy - that is how to find a mate. In this quickie episode, Dr. Wendy thought it would be a great idea to talk a little about what you do with your mate once you catch one! Now what?? Here are ten great tips on making love last once you found your match.Call the Mating Matters message line: 323-207-8277

    Allo Parents with the Grande Dame!

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 20, 2019 13:08


    Dr. Wendy's sick (yeah, right). I'm not buying it. I think she just wanted to pull one of her favorite interviews of all time with her personal and professional hero, primatologist and anthropologist, Dr. Sarah Blaffer Hrdy. You've heard her name mentioned in many episodes where Dr. Wendy talks about allo parents (Survival of the Gayest and Mother's MILFs and Wives Parts 1 and 2, and others). Allo parents are all the people who help a child grow, stay safe and flourish. Lots of people are allo parents and don't even know it: grandmothers, aunts, uncles, teachers, neighbors, mommy's girlfriends, etc. These people are so important in human evolution, Dr. Hrdy and Dr. Walsh both think there should be an Allo Parents Day. The interview was broadcast on KFI AM640, an iHeart radio station in Los Angeles. The Dr. Wendy Walsh Show is every Sunday, 4:00-6:00 PM PST and on the iHeart Radio App.Call the Mating Matters Message Line: 323-207-8277.

    Quickie: Is Monogamy Natural?

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 13, 2019 15:02


    A Mating Matters Quickie is a flash episode to cover some general facts. Is monogamy natural? Are we torturing ourselves needlessly? Is pairing up with just one person a social construct forced upon us?? Now, now...so dramatic. Believe it or not there's a really good reason humans evolved to create long term pair bonds. And guess what, guys, you were a really big part of its creation. Mating Matters episodes related to monogamy:Hidden EggsWhat is Love?Poly-Wanna-Cracker?The Secret Lives of Super AttachersMating Matters message line: 323-207-8277. Call us! We want to hear the unusual things that turn you on - as always, without shame or judgement. A fetish is "a form of sexual desire in which gratification is linked to an abnormal degree to a particular object, item of clothing, part of the body, etc." We've all heard about a foot fetish. Well, if you can relate to this or in some other way, let us know. Thanks, listeners! We love hearing from you.

    The Secret Life of Super Attachers

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 6, 2019 34:18


    Why is it that some people struggle with maintaining intimate relationships and others seem to skip through the decades seemingly with no trouble at all? What have they got that others don't? What do they know? What's their SECRET!?!Well, aside from probably having good models of love as they were growing up, some people literally were born with a genetic advantage. But once again, remember, biology is not destiny! Here's what you need to know to make the most of love in your life.Comments, questions, a story you'd like to share? Call the Mating Matters message line: 323-207-8277. Call us if you have ever fallen in love with and/or had a physical relationship with someone you're related to. There's an explanation and it's anonymous, of course.

    BEHIND THE MINDS: Dr. Maryanne Fisher

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 30, 2019 30:09


    BEHIND THE MINDS is the series in Mating Matters that opens up our expert interviews to anyone who is sciencey and nerdy and curious enough to want to hear it all! Want to know more? Here it is. In this Behind the Minds episode Dr. Wendy talks to Dr. Maryanne Fisher. You heard her first in our episode called "Mean Girls, Gold Diggers and Sluts." She is a Professor in the Department of Psychology, and a member of the Women and Gender Studies Program, at Saint Mary's University in Halifax, Canada. She also happens to be a rockstar as one of the few feminist evolutionary psychologists.Think about it. Historically, most people researching biology, history, psychology (etc, etc.) have been men. It hasn't been so long since scientists acknowledged there are real differences in the sexes, and that there may actually be two sides to...uhhh, EVERYTHING.In this fly on the wall extended interview, these women talk about our man Darwin, female strategy, mate guarding, slut shaming, The Contrast Effect (YIKES!!)...and more, of course!Enjoy!Call the Mating Matters Message Line: 323-207-8277. Talk to us. Who started puberty EARLY? Raise your hand....and then pick up the phone. (Early means first in your class and enough to make you know something is different for you.)

    Mating Message: Cinderella's Mate Crunch

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 23, 2019 17:06


    We freaked a listener out. We didn't mean to, but we can certainly understand why. So assuming she wasn't the only one, we have recorded Wendy's advice to a panicked PhD candidate for anyone else out there who needs to know: What Do I Do Now?Yes, it seems there is a mate crunch. That is, more women focusing on their higher education, big careers and personal accomplishments than ever before, while men have maintained their same numbers and are therefore actually falling behind. Knowing there might not be a corresponding mate for every high achieving woman, some ladies are understandably a little jittery.Don't worry, girls. Don't worry, guys. Dr. Wendy suggests perhaps this is just evolution doing its thing and maybe it's time to redefine the Cinderella story. Humans are highly adaptable and super great problem solvers.We got this!Mating Matters Message Line: 323-207-8277 Call us! By the way, we're on the search for people who started puberty exceptionally young - like, 10ish and younger. Talk to us!To see the transcripts of our full episodes, click HERE.

    Why Women Have Sex

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 16, 2019 33:13


    Why do women have sex?Weeeeell....it's complicated.Let's just say, guys, you're not wrong if you ever feel a little confused. Guess what, so are we sometimes. But truly, when we dive down in to it, it just goes to prove the theory that women are super duper complex. We are cerebral, but emotional; passionate, but defensive; curious, but cautious. And, of course, none of this matters if the garbage hasn't been taken out.You'll hear from two experts who literally wrote the book. Before them everyone just assumed...duh, women have sex to make babies and shower their boo with love. These two discovered there's A LOT more going on when women eventually have sex.To hear Dr. Cindy Meston's 2010 talk, click HERE.To hear Dr. David Buss' 2010 talk, click HERE.For their book, Why Women Have Sex: Understanding Sexual Motivations from Adventure to Revenge (and Everything in Between), click HERE.To find the transcripts of full episodes, click HERE.The Mating Matters message line is: 323-207-8277. Yes, it works! Please leave a message. We love hearing from you.

    Rape - A Love Story (Part 2)

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 9, 2019 45:00


    Sexual coercion is not just a woman's problem. It is not something that women just need to learn to deal with, navigate or survive. It is everyone's problem to solve. It is everyone's biological nemesis. With awareness of their own biology, men can recognize triggering situations and avoid them. With awareness of men's slippery wiring, women can recognize dangerous situations and avoid them, if possible.In Part 1 you heard "D," a self-proclaimed perpetrator, but also a sympathetic human. In Part 2, you'll hear from a brave survivor of rape. She will inspire you and educate you.Also in this episode, Dr. Randy Thornhill talks about prevention and the psychosocial influences on the men who go there.Dr. Wendy and I both feel the two Mating Matters episodes about rape are the two most important episodes we could ever produce. However, it is obviously a very sensitive topic. If you are a minor please listen to this with the guidance of a parent. If you are a parent, listen with your teen. If you are a health, sex ed, psychology, or sociology professor, please consider making these required listening.The Mating Matters message line is 323-207-8277.You can find all transcripts of full episodes HERE!

    Rape - A Love Story (Part 1)

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 2, 2019 46:08


    Sexual coercion has been part of human history since we were Neanderthals living in caves. As abhorrent as rape is, it is something that has traveled the millennia with us through our genes. It is literally part of us. How do we deal with this horrific fact? We explore it so we can understand it so we can fight against it. A scientist who actually "wrote the book" about sexual coercion helps us get our heads around the truth. And the truth is that this situation involves every single one of us, even those we trust and love dearly.Then there are the other elements of sexual coercion: intimidation and harassment. Most men never rape, but in the age of enlightenment known as #MeToo, "normal" guys are reflecting and remembering moments that make them cringe. Dr. Wendy talks to a listener who is still carrying the guilt of a moment that happened many years ago as a teenager and wanted to come clean. Please know now his story does not involve rape.Dr. Wendy and I both feel the two Mating Matters episodes about sexual coercion are probably the most important episodes we could produce. Everyone could benefit from knowing more about our evolutionary wiring. If you are under 18, please include the guidance of a parent. If you are a parent, listen with your teen. If you are a health, sex ed, psychology, or sociology professor, please consider making these required listening.The Mating Matters message line is 323-207-8277.You can find all transcripts of full episodes HERE!

    Poly-Wanna-Cracker? (Season 2 Premiere)

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 25, 2019 37:01


    Are we REALLY supposed to be with one person and ONLY one person, like, FOREVER?! Monogamy can be...challenging. Ask just about anyone who's been married a few years. Mating Matters' Season 2 kicks off with an episode about a hot topic many listeners specifically asked for: Polyamory. Polyamory is the practice of engaging in multiple sexual relationships with the consent of all the people involved. In the real world, though, people use the word to mean many things. Dr. Wendy explores the pros and cons of non-traditional intimate relationships asking if polyamory is actually supported in our human evolution.Mating Matters Message Line: 323-207-8277You can find all transcripts of full episodes HERE!

    Mating Message: Hold up, Dr. Walsh

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 19, 2019 4:04


    Season 2 begins next week and we thought this question posed by a listener recently was the perfect primer for the premier episode, Poly-Wanna-Cracker? Polyamory seems to be all the rage in recent years and the idea of getting to love - or at least be intimate with - multiple people is certainly intriguing to many. Polyamory's definition, though, is kind of slippery and there may be some confusion out there. Dr. Wendy explains what true polyamory is in this baby bonus episode.If you have a comment or question for Dr. Wendy, call our Mating Matters message line: 323-207-8277.To find transcripts of full episodes, click HERE.

    Mating Message: Sex Vs. Intimacy

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 17, 2019 6:13


    In this little bite size bonus, Dr. Wendy addresses listener Alex from Michigan's question she left on our Mating Matters message line. Is it possible to share yourself completely without sex? How intimate can you be before a line is crossed? It's something we've AAALLL struggled with at one time or another as we navigate love and monogamy and sex. Yes, I did say AAALL. I know, a gross generalization. I should have said "many" or "most of us," but I'm just going for it, cuz deep down, isn't it true?And if i'm wrong, and shame on me, call the Mating Matters message line and tell me so! 323-207-8277Also, we're looking for a few of you for Season 2 episodes. If you started puberty waaay earlier than your friends and/or if you are a woman who has experienced "The Change," call us. Tell us about it.~BrookeTo find transcripts of full episodes, click HERE.

    BEHIND THE MINDS: Dr. Justin Garcia

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 12, 2019 31:23


    BEHIND THE MINDS is a new series in Mating Matters that opens up our expert interviews to anyone who is sciencey and nerdy and curious enough to want to hear it all! Want to know more? Here it is. Justin Garcia, MS, PhD, was the cool expert you heard in Dating App-athy. He's an evolutionary biologist and sex researcher at the Kinsey Institute at Indiana University. Dr. Wendy's interview with him is definitely one of the tops of the season.He and Dr. Wendy go deep on topics like the paradox of choice, "the secretary's dilemma," and the importance of our attachment styles...and Googling your dates!!Enjoy!Mating Matters Message line is (323) 207-8277. Feel like connecting? Do it! To find transcripts of full episodes, click HERE.

    #MeToo Round Two

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 13, 2019 15:06


    There's been some rumblings that we have now entered the "Post #MeToo" era. Dr. Wendy says, whoa, whoa, whoa!. Not so fast. Well, actually things are moving super fast, but we aren't there quite yet. Instead, it's more like the world has just been taking a breather. In fact, the second wave has just begun. Of course Jeffrey Epstein was a huge sexual offender of young girls, but the last bomb to drop is opera's legendary singer and undisputed "God," Placido Domingo. At least nine women have accused him of aggressive workplace sexual harassment. Dr. Wendy reminds us what the #MeToo umbrella covers and continues the discussion of the evolution of sexual aggression. There's a reason for everything.Our Mating Matters Message Line is 323-207-8277CALL OUT: If you have anything to say about breaking up, including break up styles and skills - are you really good or really bad at it?, stalking or being stalked, please share.Please try to find a quiet place with a good connection just in case we want to use your contribution. Plug in your ear buds! The microphone sounds pretty darn good.You can find all transcripts and full episodes HERE!

    The Evolution of Epstein

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 10, 2019 13:59


    Uber wealthy millionaire Jeffrey Epstein has a thing for girls. Epstein has been arrested a second time on charges of sex trafficking in Florida and now also in New York. He was sentenced in 2008 to 18 months in a Palm Beach "jail," but ended up doing 13. (It was anything but hard time.) Dr. Wendy Walsh digs through the evolutionary reason a man with boundless resources goes to the dark side. And despite a bottomless stash of cash, he and other men like him can't do it alone. You know what, though? Times. They are a-changin'.Mating Matters is a podcast that includes and examines content meant for adults. It may not be appropriate for younger listeners.Mating Matters Message Line: 323-207-8277 

    Listeners Talk: Pornography Trigger

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 19, 2019 30:19


    Listeners Talk is a series of full interviews with Mating Matters fans who have called our message line. Ashli has had some troubling times over the years in her relationships because of pornography. She contacted Dr. Wendy for some clarity and advice. We used some of her interview in Pornography Mindf**k, but, truly, the conversation she had with Dr. Wendy was so great and it's about something that is affecting so many people, we thought we'd just let you all be the fly on the wall and maybe glean a little something extra from the full interview. Enjoy!Thank you, Ashli, for being so open and candid. It's a topic so many people find difficult to talk about.**Note: This interview has been slightly edited for quality and relevance.Our Mating Matters Message Line is 323-207-8277 Listener Call Out: If you have anything to say about polyamory or different reasons, women, you have sex, please share. When you call, try to find a quiet place with a good connection just in case we want to use your voice. Plug in your ear buds, the microphone sounds pretty darn good! You can find all transcripts and full episodes HERE!

    Pornography Mindf**k

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 5, 2019 34:31


    Pornography. It feels like it’s everywhere. And the debate about porn keeps heating up. Is porn addictive? Are our relationships being hurt or helped by pornography? Why did humans evolve to copulate with a screen? Well, it's definitely complicated. Pornography might simply be a "mating error." Our Mating Matters Message Line is 323-207-8277 If you have anything to say about breaking up, including break up styles and skills - are you really good or really bad at it?, stalking or being stalked, please share. When you call, try to find a quiet place with a good connection just in case we want to use your contribution. Plug in your ear buds! The microphone sounds pretty darn good. You can find all transcripts and full episodes HERE!

    Mean Girls, Gold Diggers and Sluts

    Play Episode Listen Later May 29, 2019 27:11


    You know them; you've seen them; maybe you're even one of them. All the gossip, trash talk and slut shaming nearly every woman has grown up with? It actually has a reproductive purpose. The same kinds of female disses take place across our entire species around the world and have been from the beginning of time. But the truly tricky part is that women actually need each other...badly! From the early days of our species’ evolution, it was a circle of women practicing co-operative parenting who really kept the tribe together. They shared food, protection, emotional support, babysitting duties, and sometimes even men. But, to this day, we never share one of those without a fight. Mating Matters Message Line: 323-207-8277Hot Tip: When you call, try to find a quiet place with a good connection just in case we want to use your contribution; use your ear buds, the microphone sounds pretty darn good.

    BONUS: Beware the Silver Medal

    Play Episode Listen Later May 22, 2019 21:42


    Did you already know that to your brain there is no difference between physical pain and emotional pain? There's a scientific reason people describe hurt feelings as a slap in the face or a punch in the gut - it's real. Dr. Wendy explains the importance of social integration, finding your tribe, and looking down when you're feeling bad - especially when you're finding your mate. Oh, the silver medal? For some, that would be a slap in the face.Mating Matters Message Line: 323-207-8277Hot Tip: When you call, try to find a quiet place with a good connection just in case we want to use your contribution; use your ear buds, the microphone sounds pretty darn good. 

    Listeners Talk: An Alpha and His Junk Food Sex

    Play Episode Listen Later May 15, 2019 26:38


    A listener called in to ask Dr. Wendy for some advice about his rampant promiscuity. At almost 7-feet tall. our friend says he went from high school "freak" to college basketball golden boy and the ladies lined up. He's been taking advantage of the sexual opportunities, but he says he isn't any happier than all of the guys he knows who can't even get a date. Men, is he living the dream? You may be surprised by what he says is lacking. Ladies, is he a dog? What's a young, single guy to do when women are throwing themselves at him? A special thanks to this incredible listener for speaking with Dr. Wendy so honestly and openly. Like a true alpha, he took a risk. Thank you for trusting us.Mating Matters Message Line: 323-207-8277Hot Tip: When you call, try to find a quiet place with a good connection just in case we want to use your contribution; plug in your ear buds, the microphone sounds pretty darn good. Song "Junk Food Sex" is by Beans on Toast. To hear more of his music, click HERE! Also, you can now find all TRANSCRIPTS of the regular episodes, HERE!

    BONUS: The Chosen One

    Play Episode Listen Later May 8, 2019 21:47


    The genes we inherit from our ancestors may set us up for emotional and relationship challenges, but that doesn't mean we are doomed. Biology is not destiny. Dr. Wendy gets in to some new research on intergenerational psychology. If you have unexplained anxiety and depression, you may be carrying trauma from your family's past. You may be "The Chosen One" in your clan to investigate your family's history and heal your family today. But not to worry! It's a gift.Mating Maters Message Line: 323-207-8277Research Links:Study Of Holocaust Survivors Finds Trauma Passed On To Children's GenesNongenomic Transmission Across Generations of Maternal Behavior and Stress Responses in the RatBiological pathways for historical trauma to affect health: A conceptual model focusing on epigenetic modificationsSex-Specific Programming of Offspring Emotionality Following Stress Early in PregnancyEpigenetic Influence of Social Experiences Across the LifespanAlso, you can now find all TRANSCRIPTS of the regular episodes, HERE!

    Mating Message of Interracial Hots

    Play Episode Listen Later May 1, 2019 19:01


    In this BONUS tweener (between episodes) Dr. Wendy explores race in evolution and in love, What turns you on? Why? Well, believe it or not for once there is a pretty simple answer! Can't give it all away, but let's just say a joyful squeal from mom might have something to do with it.We love hearing from you. Thanks to everyone who has called to tell us what they like, would prefer, and want to hear more of. Speaking of callers...Our Mating Matters Message Line is 323-207-8277. If you have anything to say about pornography, please share. No judgement, just human behavior. You can talk about you, your significant other, a friend - doesn't matter. What's going on? How often do you watch or indulge? Do you feel like it's getting in the way of your relationship somehow? Can you still enjoy sex with a person? Could you stop? When you call, try to find a quiet place with a good connection just in case we want to use your contribution. Plug in your ear buds! The microphone sounds pretty darn good. Heads up, the message recording will cut you off after 3 minutes. Also, you can now find all TRANSCRIPTS and the episodes, of course, HERE!

    The Price of Manhood

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 24, 2019 34:34


    What does it mean to be a man? Why did uber masculine behavior evolve in the first place? Is there a mating advantage? Spoiler alert. There used to be an advantage, but the environment is changing and men are adapting to a different kind of hunting ground. Way back in 1874 Charles Darwin had human mating figured out. In fact, he once wrote “if each male secures two or more females, many males cannot pair.” That’s the biggest fear of any man. No guy wants to be the one who misses out on mating.Please be aware this episode contains strong language and content regarding domestic violence and sexual assault..Mating Matters Message Line: 323-207-8277Links:Tony Porter, TEDWomen 2010, "A Call to Men" - https://bit.ly/2Gsrt8QJustin Baldoni, TEDWomen 2017, "Why I'm done trying to be 'man enough'" - https://bit.ly/2Ds5XAk

    Mothers, MILF's & Wives - Part 2

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 17, 2019 29:54


    There’s probably no deeper, heart-wrenching emotional experience for women than the feelings that surround reproduction. Hope for a baby, the loss of a baby, the joy of a baby, the worry over a baby, and the feelings of sadness when a woman’s fertility window closes with no baby in sight. The risks and burden of reproduction seem to fall unfairly on women who face the challenges of survival with children in tow, and sometimes have to make heart-breaking decisions. This isn’t new. Our cave-women ancestors also faced harsh environments -- a famine a millennium ago has become a recession and job loss today. Mating Matters Message Line: 323-207-8277

    Mothers, MILF's & Wives - Part 1

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 10, 2019 32:41


    Motherhood is tricky. That's because motherhood is all about sacrifices and...worry. They worry about health, shelter, nutrition, education, and money. Despite this, about 80% of women become mothers one way or another, and most of the others are mothers to the village. Women have long had plenty of reproductive choices - if they have a baby, when they have a baby, with whom they have a baby, whether that baby will survive, and whether they’ll care for their own or others. If you’re a woman, there are plenty of ways to keep your genes in evolution’s chain or raise the species as a whole. Mating Matters Message Line: 323-207-8277

    Mating Messages of Status and Sexuality

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 3, 2019 20:17


    Mating Matters has busted out a new message line for people to ask questions and tell stories. While we're super busy producing more episodes for you, we thought we could cover some other territory in the meantime. On this BONUS episode, Dr. Wendy focuses on two interesting calls she has received - one about how a short man can raise his dating status in this new world of trigger swiping dating apps; the other from a woman who got married young to a man she loves deeply, but has never been sexually attracted to. After ten years of marriage, they decided to switch to a polyamorous relationship. Tricky? Perhaps, but her actual question, though, may surprise you.Mating Matters Message Line: 323-207-8277

    BONUS: Evolution's Hard Truth

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 27, 2019 15:15


    Evolution's Hard Truth addresses the fact that "survival of the fittest" can be a tough pill to swallow. About 10% of men never mate and about 18% of women never reproduce. Human mating is an inside job. though, and there are things you can do to make sure you find yourself a mate, if you want one. Dr. Wendy gives some tips on how we can win the mating game by raising our mate status and focusing on things we CAN control. No, you do not need to be rich and great looking, but you do need to get yourself in shape - inside and out - to be the person another person wants to be with. Use your single time to do important personal work so you're ready when someone special comes along.Mating Matters also has a brand new message line! Call 323-207-8277 to ask Dr. Wendy a question, share your thoughts or tell us a story. We may include your voice on one of our episodes. Please know that by leaving the message you are giving us permission to use it.

    Survival of the Gayest

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 20, 2019 34:50


    Ever wonder why same-sex behavior evolved in our species? If we are wired to reproduce, being gay - and theoretically not reproducing - seems like a sure fire way for our species to struggle to exist. For the record, at this point in our evolution, humans still need an egg, sperm and a womb to reproduce. So how have people who may not reproduce stay in our gene pool? Historically, same-sex behavior actually has increased chances for survival. And did you realize heterosexual people have a  secret advantage if they have a gay brother or sister? Mother Nature is a perfect planner. And survival of the fittest might also mean survival of the gayest. 

    Sexy Money

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 13, 2019 34:14


    In this episode of Matting Matters Dr. Wendy explores how the pursuit of money is really pursuit of sex for men, and why it works in reverse for women; why some singles pay more for sexual opportunity than they do for rent; why prostitution rates rise when women are disadvantaged, and why the price of sex drops drastically when women rise in economic power! No matter how you reckon it, sex costs.

    What is Love?

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 6, 2019 24:41


    Art imitates life. The science of falling in love involves biological, social and psychological mechanisms. Dr. Wendy breaks down the underpinnings of everyone’s favorite drug - love -using vibrant examples from your favorite movies. 

    Dating App-athy

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 27, 2019 26:35


    How dating apps can change your brain and bio-hack your evolutionary programming…unless you use them correctly.

    The God Who Clubs

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 20, 2019 29:43


    Religions created rules around dating, mating and procreating to increase reproduction and membership. If you don't know someone, but you know they share the same religion, or tribe, there is almost instant trust. Hint: the more punitive the God, the faster a religion grows. 

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