Podcasts about mating matters

Let's talk about LOVE….Dr. Wendy Walsh, Americas Relationship Expert is ready to shed light on our “Mating Matters” which is also the name of her popular podcast. We are talking about dating, mating, marriage and what is really going on out there from a scientific perspective. This is a fascinating look at where we have evolved to in our mating rituals and what women need to know about the landscape. I have quite a few girlfriends who are dating or re entering the dating scene after divorce but even if you have been married a long time, or have some young women heading off to college, there is a lot of Gold Nuggets in this podcast. Connect with: Website: https://www.drwendywalsh.com/ IG: https://www.instagram.com/drwendywalsh/?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y%3D TIK TOK https://www.tiktok.com/@drwendywalsh?_t=8Z0HsBXmsD0&_r=1 Linkedin https://www.linkedin.com/in/wendylwalsh/ Guest Bios: DR. WENDY WALSH Dr. Wendy Walsh's three-decade career straddles the worlds of media and higher education. Walsh is an award-winning television Journalist is a current Radio Host and Podcaster at KFI AM 640 of iHeartMedia, is the author of three books and thousands of print and digital articles. She was named one of Time Magazine's Persons of the Year in 2017 after speaking out about harassment at Fox News. She currently teaches in the Psychology department at California State University, Channel Islands. Fresh out of journalism school in the late 1980's, Walsh began her career as a freelance writer for consumer magazines, specializing in health and exercise science. After relocating to Los Angeles, she worked as a reporter and anchor at UPN News 13 where she won two news Emmy Awards. During the 1990's she hosted and reported for dozens of news and information shows on a variety of television networks including HBO, Fox Sports, Court TV and Investigation Discovery Network. She gained national recognition when she hosted the Warner Bros. syndicated magazine show, EXTRA. During that time, she helmed her own production company and produced a number of cable series shows. In the 2000's, as she raised two daughters, she turned her attention to psychology, human development and attachment theory. After earning a mid-life Ph.D. in Clinical Psychology, she returned to television as an expert commentator, quickly becoming a frequent face with Don Lemon on CNN, and many other networks including The O'Reilly Factor on Fox News, HLN, NBC, CBS, and ABC. During that time she wrote three books published by Random House and Rodale Books. In 2011, she caught the eye of Dr. Phil's producers and was tapped to join the nationally syndicated show The Doctors, where she was nominated for a Daytime Emmy Award. In 2015, she moved to radio and teaching. The Dr. Wendy Walsh show on KFI AM 640, Los Angeles was born, and she became an adjunct professor of psychology at California State University Channel Islands. There, she teaches Developmental Psychology and Psychology of Health Counseling. Her passions are Attachment Theory and Evolutionary Psychology. In 2017, she bravely spoke out about victims of sexual harassment at Fox News and was named a Time Magazine Person of the Year. In 2019, her love of relationship science, evolutionary psychology and her knack for media production were combined when she debuted the now popular podcast “Mating Matters” in partnership with iHeartMedia.

Brooke Peterson has been an absolute asset to Mating Matters. She is an excellent producer with a very bright future. What does her future entail now that she is leaving? For more episodes go to https://www.patreon.com/DrWendyWalsh

This Week's Guests: America's Relationship Expert - Dr. Wendy Walsh Comedian - Dan Naturman The World's Famous comedy Cellar presents "Live From America Podcast" with Noam Dworman and Hatem Gabr. The top experts and thinkers of the world and the best comics in the Nation get together weekly with our hosts to discuss different topics each week, News, Culture, Politics, comedy & and more with an equal parts of knowledge and comedy! About Dr. Wendy Walsh : Dr. Wendy Walsh is America's Relationship Expert. She has been studying the Science of Love for three decades and teaches Psychology at California State University Channel Islands. She also has an iHeart Radio show and Podcast called Mating Matters, which you can find on her Patreon page. Her 1-million TikTok followers are dedicated to finding or keeping healthy relationships. https://www.patreon.com/posts/mating-matters-1-53664393 https://www.drwendywalsh.com/ Follow Live From America YouTube www.youtube.com/channel/UCS2fqgw61yK1J6iKNxV0LmA Twitter twitter.com/AmericasPodcast www.LiveFromAmericaPodcast.com LiveFromAmerica@ComedyCellar.com Follow Hatem Twitter twitter.com/HatemNYC Instagram www.instagram.com/hatemnyc/ Follow Noam Twitter twitter.com/noamdworman?lang #DRWendyWalsh #MatingMatters #RelationshipswithWendyWalsh

Dr. Wendy Walsh takes the latest science of love and turns it into news-you-can-use to improve your intimate relationships. Whether the topic is finding love by navigating dating apps, keeping love by introducing novelty and better communication skills or coping after a divorce or loss, Dr. Wendy has the data and practical advice on how to do it the healthy way. She's been the host of the Dr. Wendy Walsh Show on iHeart radio for the last six years, she's written three books on relationships and also the host of the podcast, Mating Matters. During the pandemic, when people suffered the most isolation, she blew up on social media and has nearly 2 million followers. Listen how "America's Relationship Expert" chooses herself and helps others navigate love and life. Website: https://www.patreon.com/DrWendyWalsh Become a member of our Patreon page: patreon.com/chooseyounow to have access to exclusive content and send us your questions and comments at chooseyounowpodcast@gmail.com. For more about my Nutrition services and resources, visit me at PlantBasedDietitian.com

Today we get into drama queens, kings, people! Why are they like this and you one of them? Also a second person was cured from HIV, but it happen? Plus so much more. Let's go there!  Special guests:  Richard Fowler - Fox news commentator. Brennan Suen Senior strategist at Media Matters for America. Dr. Wendy Walsh - Relationship Expert, and host of the Podcast, Mating Matters. Dr. Bruce D. Walker - Director of the Ragon Institute of MGH, MIT and Harvard.   See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Dr. Wendy Walsh, psychologist, author, radio and podcast host, explains just how important our first three years on earth are to the relationships we have over the rest of our lives. There's this thing called Attachment Theory and it's based on what happened to us as tiny little beings (thanks, Mom and Dad). As always, there's hope. Regardless of your personal circumstances, there are definitely ways to rise above! // Dr. Wendy Walsh is the author of three books on love and is the writer and host of the podcast Mating Matters. She also hosts a live radio show in Los Angeles (KFIAM 640) all about relationships. // Please rate, review, subscribe and share The Laverne Cox Show with everyone you know. You can find Laverne on Instagram and Twitter @LaverneCox and on Facebook at @LaverneCoxForReal. As always, stay in the love. Learn more about your ad-choices at https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.com

NOTE: This episode contains some adult discussion which includes topics of sexual assault and abuse.Have you ever wondered about the secret and sometimes dark world of a human's "special" desires? Dr. Wendy asks Kinsey Institute's Dr. Justin Lehmiller if scientists have discovered an evolutionary basis for our fantasy worlds and fetishes. Oh, yeah, and a whole lot more!Lehmiller is a social psychologist and the author of "Tell Me What You Want: The Science of Sexual Desire and How It Can Help You Improve Your Sex Life." His writing can also be found at sexandpsychology.comContact Dr. Wendy and Mating Matters at matingmatters@iheartmedia.com or (323) 207-8277.If you feel like you need to talk to someone about sexual assault or abuse, call the RAINN Abuse Hotline: 800-656-HOPE (4673)

Dr. Wendy is hard at work on an episode called Fantasies and Fetishes where she talks to sex researcher Justin Lehmiller from the world famous Kinsey Institute. That episode is coming soon, but in the meantime there was a lot more they talked about that was too good to hoard, like his research on "friends with benefits" and the US' super lackluster sex education policy. No wonder porn is so popular, he says! Dr. Wendy also adds some other studies to the mix.But really, what Dr. Wendy wants is for you to call our Mating Matters message line (323-207-8277) or email us a voice memo (matingmatters@iheartmedia.com) to tell her what you fantasize about or have a special "attachment" to -- i.e. fetish. Names are confidential. Talk to us!

How old were you when you started puberty? Most people will say somewhere between 10-15. There is a smaller percentage of people, though, who will experience those physical and hormonal changes earlier, in some cases MUCH earlier. Ladies, can you imagine starting your period when you were seven years old? Dr. Wendy talks with the endocrinologist who literally wrote the textbook on precocious puberty and a few people who have experienced this rare condition personally or as a parent. Questions? Thoughts? Call the Mating Matters message line at (323) 207-8277 or send a voice memo to matingmatters@iheartmedia.com.

How has evolution affected your love life and relationships? Join Dr. Tammy as she talks with Psychologist Dr. Wendy Walsh about the history of human sexuality, mating and modern love.DR. TAMMY WANTS TO ANSWER YOUR QUESTIONS about Sex, Love & Relationships! Send your questions to drtammy@thetroublewithsex.com.PROMO CODES & DEALS!WE ALL NEED A LITTLE PLEASURE RIGHT NOW. Activate Your Libido & Keep Your Sex Life Alive During These Difficult Times with Sex Toys from DAME. Visit dameproducts.com/troublewithsex and type in promo code DRTAMMY at check out for 15% OFF your order!Guest Bio:Dr. Wendy Walsh is a Psychologist with a special interest in Evolutionary Psychology and Attachment Theory. Her career includes more than two decades in print and television news as an award-winning reporter, author, producer anchor and podcaster. She hosts the popular podcast Mating Matters, produced in partnership with iHeartMedia as well as The Dr. Wendy Walsh Show, a live weekly radio show on KFI AM 640 Los Angeles. In addition, Dr. Walsh appears regularly as a psychological contributor on Nine Network Morning Show - Australia, The Today Show and CNN. She is a professor in the Psychology department at California State University, Channel Islands. In 2017 Walsh was named one of Time Magazine's Persons of the Year after speaking out about harassment at Fox News.THE TROUBLE WITH SEX RESOURCES, REFERENCES & INFO· To read more about how to improve your sex life, check out Getting the Sex You Want: Shed Your Inhibitions and Reach New Heights of Passion Together.· Learn more about love, marriage, monogamy and how to redefine your commitment to each other in Dr. Tammy's TEDX talk - The New Monogamy - or her book by the same name.· Book an ONLINE Couples or Individual Session with Dr. Tammy during COVID-19.Email: drtammy@thetroublewithsex.com. · Want more Dr. Tammy? Read: The New Monogamy, When You're the One Who Cheats and Getting the Sex You Want. · Listen to our full theme song here! NoTroublewithSex_ThemeSong Support the show (https://www.patreon.com/thetroublewithsex)

In this Quarantine Episode of Mating Matters, Dr. Wendy touches on all kinds of tools and tips for people stuck at home with one person or with no person - or too many persons! Let give each other a break right now, and especially ourselves. Adversity does NOT "reveal character" it only reveals the coping strategy a person might have in crazy times, which he or she may come by honestly. She also goes over the three main ways our psychological immune system is trying to help us through this crazy time. Oh, have you been thinking of contacting an old flame? More on that!

Dr. Cindy Meston is a clinical psychologist and professor at the University of Texas at Austin. She is also the director of the Sexual Psychophysiology Laboratory there. She may be best known for her research on the female orgasm, but she says her primary research interest is sexual arousal. You know, without arousal not much else happens.You first heard her in our Mating Matters episode called "Why Women Have Sex." In this conversation Dr. Meston talks about the preparation hypothesis, something called “desynchrony,” why a sexual contract between two people is often successful, and where the heck the pink Viagra is for women. She also tells us the number one sexual complaint in America. Basically, Dr. Cindy Meston talks to us about women’s intelligent bodies.Please be aware there is discussion regarding sexual assault, rape and a woman’s physical protection response...sometimes including involuntary orgasm. The discussions begin around 11:30 and 29:30. Both last about a minute.Call the Mating Matters message line: 323-207-8277 with a thought, question or comment.

Dr. Wendy loves her research, but sometimes some of the best stuff doesn't fit neatly in to one of our Mating Matters episodes. In this Quickie, she looks at some of the latest findings in evolutionary psychology and anthropology and shares the gems. She talks about mating strategies of women and men, including how men will often use PDF's (public displays of fatherhood) as one way of impressing women and why less sex after having a baby is NOT a sign of trouble. In fact, it's just the opposite. This episode is JAM packed with interesting things learned from modern day hunter-gatherers.Mating Matters message line: 323-207-8277.

BEHIND THE MINDS is a series in Mating Matters that opens up our expert interviews to anyone who is sciencey and nerdy and curious enough to want to hear it all! Want to know more? Here it is. Darryl Gwynne, PhD, was the charming expert you heard in "Pornography Mindf**k." Remember the beetles falling hard for the beer bottles? That's him. He's a professor of biology at the University of Toronto at Mississauga. His research is mainly about sexual selection and trying to understand the evolution of sex differences and behavior. Of course, there's a twist. His primary test subjects are insects, but, hey, we're not so different. No, really... Enjoy!Mating Matters Message line is (323) 207-8277. Feel like connecting? Do it!

We know that laughter is good for our health. It lowers stress hormones which helps our immune system work better. But is this why a sense of humor evolved in humans? Not totally. Turns out humor has been of primo importance in our natural and sexual selection. On this episode, we explore the science of comedy and why women can't seem to say no to a funny mate.Basically, if you want to woo a woman, work on your wit and word play.Mating Matters message line: 323-207-8277

Love and attachment may come in stages, phases and flavors. Love relationships may involve sex, affection, emotional intimacy, commitment, public displays of love or private trysts. But the order of those stages is changing. If you’re over 40, fasten your seat belts folks, because Millennials are showing us how our anthropological ancestors sampled from the smorgasbord of human relationships, all in the name of good reproductive choices.Questions? Thoughts? Experiences? Call the Mating Matters message line: 323-207-8277

Dr. Wendy opened her Facebook page to discover a question posed to her that really rubbed her wrong. Who says modern women still have to live up to some sexual moral code created by society hundreds of years ago? The double standard is that thing that says men get points for sexual experience, but women get judged for it. These are new days and with equality comes freedom.Have a question, thought or experience you'd like to share? Call the Mating Matters message line: 323-207-8277!

Mating Matters is all about the evolution of human mating and mating strategy - that is how to find a mate. In this quickie episode, Dr. Wendy thought it would be a great idea to talk a little about what you do with your mate once you catch one! Now what?? Here are ten great tips on making love last once you found your match.Call the Mating Matters message line: 323-207-8277

A Mating Matters Quickie is a flash episode to cover some general facts. Is monogamy natural? Are we torturing ourselves needlessly? Is pairing up with just one person a social construct forced upon us?? Now, now...so dramatic. Believe it or not there's a really good reason humans evolved to create long term pair bonds. And guess what, guys, you were a really big part of its creation. Mating Matters episodes related to monogamy:Hidden EggsWhat is Love?Poly-Wanna-Cracker?The Secret Lives of Super AttachersMating Matters message line: 323-207-8277. Call us! We want to hear the unusual things that turn you on - as always, without shame or judgement. A fetish is "a form of sexual desire in which gratification is linked to an abnormal degree to a particular object, item of clothing, part of the body, etc." We've all heard about a foot fetish. Well, if you can relate to this or in some other way, let us know. Thanks, listeners! We love hearing from you.

Why is it that some people struggle with maintaining intimate relationships and others seem to skip through the decades seemingly with no trouble at all? What have they got that others don't? What do they know? What's their SECRET!?!Well, aside from probably having good models of love as they were growing up, some people literally were born with a genetic advantage. But once again, remember, biology is not destiny! Here's what you need to know to make the most of love in your life.Comments, questions, a story you'd like to share? Call the Mating Matters message line: 323-207-8277. Call us if you have ever fallen in love with and/or had a physical relationship with someone you're related to. There's an explanation and it's anonymous, of course.

Katie Hill scandal and ethical breach. The most depressed people often live alone. Mating Matters episode 7: Survival of the Gayest.

BEHIND THE MINDS is the series in Mating Matters that opens up our expert interviews to anyone who is sciencey and nerdy and curious enough to want to hear it all! Want to know more? Here it is. In this Behind the Minds episode Dr. Wendy talks to Dr. Maryanne Fisher. You heard her first in our episode called "Mean Girls, Gold Diggers and Sluts." She is a Professor in the Department of Psychology, and a member of the Women and Gender Studies Program, at Saint Mary's University in Halifax, Canada. She also happens to be a rockstar as one of the few feminist evolutionary psychologists.Think about it. Historically, most people researching biology, history, psychology (etc, etc.) have been men. It hasn't been so long since scientists acknowledged there are real differences in the sexes, and that there may actually be two sides to...uhhh, EVERYTHING.In this fly on the wall extended interview, these women talk about our man Darwin, female strategy, mate guarding, slut shaming, The Contrast Effect (YIKES!!)...and more, of course!Enjoy!Call the Mating Matters Message Line: 323-207-8277. Talk to us. Who started puberty EARLY? Raise your hand....and then pick up the phone. (Early means first in your class and enough to make you know something is different for you.)

Why do women have sex?Weeeeell....it's complicated.Let's just say, guys, you're not wrong if you ever feel a little confused. Guess what, so are we sometimes. But truly, when we dive down in to it, it just goes to prove the theory that women are super duper complex. We are cerebral, but emotional; passionate, but defensive; curious, but cautious. And, of course, none of this matters if the garbage hasn't been taken out.You'll hear from two experts who literally wrote the book. Before them everyone just assumed...duh, women have sex to make babies and shower their boo with love. These two discovered there's A LOT more going on when women eventually have sex.To hear Dr. Cindy Meston's 2010 talk, click HERE.To hear Dr. David Buss' 2010 talk, click HERE.For their book, Why Women Have Sex: Understanding Sexual Motivations from Adventure to Revenge (and Everything in Between), click HERE.To find the transcripts of full episodes, click HERE.The Mating Matters message line is: 323-207-8277. Yes, it works! Please leave a message. We love hearing from you.

Sexual coercion is not just a woman's problem. It is not something that women just need to learn to deal with, navigate or survive. It is everyone's problem to solve. It is everyone's biological nemesis. With awareness of their own biology, men can recognize triggering situations and avoid them. With awareness of men's slippery wiring, women can recognize dangerous situations and avoid them, if possible.In Part 1 you heard "D," a self-proclaimed perpetrator, but also a sympathetic human. In Part 2, you'll hear from a brave survivor of rape. She will inspire you and educate you.Also in this episode, Dr. Randy Thornhill talks about prevention and the psychosocial influences on the men who go there.Dr. Wendy and I both feel the two Mating Matters episodes about rape are the two most important episodes we could ever produce. However, it is obviously a very sensitive topic. If you are a minor please listen to this with the guidance of a parent. If you are a parent, listen with your teen. If you are a health, sex ed, psychology, or sociology professor, please consider making these required listening.The Mating Matters message line is 323-207-8277.You can find all transcripts of full episodes HERE!

The health and mental benefits of special diets and how food affects your mood. The benefits of gut health for anxiety and depression. An episode of the podcast, Mating Matters, called Dating App-athy.

Sexual coercion has been part of human history since we were Neanderthals living in caves. As abhorrent as rape is, it is something that has traveled the millennia with us through our genes. It is literally part of us. How do we deal with this horrific fact? We explore it so we can understand it so we can fight against it. A scientist who actually "wrote the book" about sexual coercion helps us get our heads around the truth. And the truth is that this situation involves every single one of us, even those we trust and love dearly.Then there are the other elements of sexual coercion: intimidation and harassment. Most men never rape, but in the age of enlightenment known as #MeToo, "normal" guys are reflecting and remembering moments that make them cringe. Dr. Wendy talks to a listener who is still carrying the guilt of a moment that happened many years ago as a teenager and wanted to come clean. Please know now his story does not involve rape.Dr. Wendy and I both feel the two Mating Matters episodes about sexual coercion are probably the most important episodes we could produce. Everyone could benefit from knowing more about our evolutionary wiring. If you are under 18, please include the guidance of a parent. If you are a parent, listen with your teen. If you are a health, sex ed, psychology, or sociology professor, please consider making these required listening.The Mating Matters message line is 323-207-8277.You can find all transcripts of full episodes HERE!

Season 2 begins next week and we thought this question posed by a listener recently was the perfect primer for the premier episode, Poly-Wanna-Cracker? Polyamory seems to be all the rage in recent years and the idea of getting to love - or at least be intimate with - multiple people is certainly intriguing to many. Polyamory's definition, though, is kind of slippery and there may be some confusion out there. Dr. Wendy explains what true polyamory is in this baby bonus episode.If you have a comment or question for Dr. Wendy, call our Mating Matters message line: 323-207-8277.To find transcripts of full episodes, click HERE.

In this little bite size bonus, Dr. Wendy addresses listener Alex from Michigan's question she left on our Mating Matters message line. Is it possible to share yourself completely without sex? How intimate can you be before a line is crossed? It's something we've AAALLL struggled with at one time or another as we navigate love and monogamy and sex. Yes, I did say AAALL. I know, a gross generalization. I should have said "many" or "most of us," but I'm just going for it, cuz deep down, isn't it true?And if i'm wrong, and shame on me, call the Mating Matters message line and tell me so! 323-207-8277Also, we're looking for a few of you for Season 2 episodes. If you started puberty waaay earlier than your friends and/or if you are a woman who has experienced "The Change," call us. Tell us about it.~BrookeTo find transcripts of full episodes, click HERE.

BEHIND THE MINDS is a new series in Mating Matters that opens up our expert interviews to anyone who is sciencey and nerdy and curious enough to want to hear it all! Want to know more? Here it is. Justin Garcia, MS, PhD, was the cool expert you heard in Dating App-athy. He's an evolutionary biologist and sex researcher at the Kinsey Institute at Indiana University. Dr. Wendy's interview with him is definitely one of the tops of the season.He and Dr. Wendy go deep on topics like the paradox of choice, "the secretary's dilemma," and the importance of our attachment styles...and Googling your dates!!Enjoy!Mating Matters Message line is (323) 207-8277. Feel like connecting? Do it! To find transcripts of full episodes, click HERE.

The evolution of nesting. Mating Matters topic: The evolution of rape. Living and working with the Neurodiverse. Make-shift dream analysis.

Uber wealthy millionaire Jeffrey Epstein has a thing for girls. Epstein has been arrested a second time on charges of sex trafficking in Florida and now also in New York. He was sentenced in 2008 to 18 months in a Palm Beach "jail," but ended up doing 13. (It was anything but hard time.) Dr. Wendy Walsh digs through the evolutionary reason a man with boundless resources goes to the dark side. And despite a bottomless stash of cash, he and other men like him can't do it alone. You know what, though? Times. They are a-changin'.Mating Matters is a podcast that includes and examines content meant for adults. It may not be appropriate for younger listeners.Mating Matters Message Line: 323-207-8277 

Listeners Talk is a series of full interviews with Mating Matters fans who have called our message line. Ashli has had some troubling times over the years in her relationships because of pornography. She contacted Dr. Wendy for some clarity and advice. We used some of her interview in Pornography Mindf**k, but, truly, the conversation she had with Dr. Wendy was so great and it's about something that is affecting so many people, we thought we'd just let you all be the fly on the wall and maybe glean a little something extra from the full interview. Enjoy!Thank you, Ashli, for being so open and candid. It's a topic so many people find difficult to talk about.**Note: This interview has been slightly edited for quality and relevance.Our Mating Matters Message Line is 323-207-8277 Listener Call Out: If you have anything to say about polyamory or different reasons, women, you have sex, please share. When you call, try to find a quiet place with a good connection just in case we want to use your voice. Plug in your ear buds, the microphone sounds pretty darn good! You can find all transcripts and full episodes HERE!

Mating Matters has busted out a new message line for people to ask questions and tell stories. While we're super busy producing more episodes for you, we thought we could cover some other territory in the meantime. On this BONUS episode, Dr. Wendy focuses on two interesting calls she has received - one about how a short man can raise his dating status in this new world of trigger swiping dating apps; the other from a woman who got married young to a man she loves deeply, but has never been sexually attracted to. After ten years of marriage, they decided to switch to a polyamorous relationship. Tricky? Perhaps, but her actual question, though, may surprise you.Mating Matters Message Line: 323-207-8277

Evolution's Hard Truth addresses the fact that "survival of the fittest" can be a tough pill to swallow. About 10% of men never mate and about 18% of women never reproduce. Human mating is an inside job. though, and there are things you can do to make sure you find yourself a mate, if you want one. Dr. Wendy gives some tips on how we can win the mating game by raising our mate status and focusing on things we CAN control. No, you do not need to be rich and great looking, but you do need to get yourself in shape - inside and out - to be the person another person wants to be with. Use your single time to do important personal work so you're ready when someone special comes along.Mating Matters also has a brand new message line! Call 323-207-8277 to ask Dr. Wendy a question, share your thoughts or tell us a story. We may include your voice on one of our episodes. Please know that by leaving the message you are giving us permission to use it.

Kevin M. Kruse and Dr. Wendy Walsh join us this week. Kruse discusses his book, "Fault Lines", tracing America's divisions back more than four decades and Walsh offers relationship advice and talks about her new podcast, "Mating Matters".

Once again, we have another spy in our midst. The Justice Department just unsealed an indictment against a former Air Force counterintelligence officer on espionage charges for allegedly revealing classified info to Iran. Eric Geller, cyber security reporter for Politico, joins us for more on Monica Witt, who defected to Iran and gave away some of our secrets. Next, since its Valentine's Day, let's talk about love and the gamification of dating. It's all around us… viral matchmaker shows to find love or apps that we use to endlessly swipe on to find a date, all this technology might actually be making it harder to meet “the one.” Jessie Li, reporter for Axios, joins us to talk about how apps are the new norm in dating and how it affects us. Finally, we talk to Dr. Wendy Walsh, psychology professor and author, who has a new podcast out called Mating Matters.  In her new podcast she uses the science of human behavior to talk about love and sex and how mating instincts control everything we do. Mating Matters is out now on iHeart Radio or whenever you get your podcasts. Learn more about your ad-choices at https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.com

Why mating matters, online daying, when should we lose virginity, how to tell if a relationship is real, and empty-nest depression.

I welcome Dr. Wendy Walsh back for a repeat of her awesome performance on Episode 15 when she talked about her area of expertise, evolutionary psychology applied to modern love. Dr. Wendy brings her “A” game again with an effortless and effusive dispensation of extremely memorable and life-changing insights about relationships, parenting, the future of humanity, and her provocative new podcast called Mating Matters on iHeart Radio. We pick up where we left off at the last show, with the examination of modern mating dynamics, and Wendy describes the attributes necessary to nurture and sustain a healthy, happy, long-term love relationship. It’s a delicate balance between healthy autonomy and sustaining a strong connection. Wendy asserts that “too much autonomy means no intimacy. Too much union means fusion, and that’s not healthy either.” We transition into one of her most passionate subjects, parenting. Wendy points out that “parenting” wasn’t even a verb word until recent years! Wendy counters some of today’s boilerplate assumptions about parenting, observing that many parents are doing not enough instead of too much, and that raising your children should be a priority for that small 20-year window of time when you are on duty. Oh, if you are patting yourself on the back as a hugely devoted parent running around orchestrating a perfect life for your precious superstar kid, you may want to reflect on whether it’s really about the kid, or about your ego—living your dreams through your kid. Instead, Wendy advocates that you should tune into your child, learn who they really are and what makes them tick, and facilitate the pursuit of their goals and dreams. In light of our cultural concerns that today’s kids might become hapless drones of the digital age, Wendy observes that children are extremely smart and adaptable, and they are simply adapting and leveraging the necessary skills to survive in today’s world. And keep in mind that the older generations always think that things are in decline when looking at younger generations Wendy takes a segue to fawn over her celebrity crush, Elon Musk. You’ll realize why this dude comes to mind when you learn the recording location. Wendy says he’s definitely a genius; alas he might not be dateable material. Wendy is ever sharp, spicy and humorous, but we also get deep at times when she reflects on the future of humanity, on how to come from a position of gratitude in daily life, particularly how it relates to not sweating the small stuff in relationship (Check out Mia Moore show, episode #9 “ Don’t Sweat The Small Stuff ( https://www.bradkearns.com/2018/09/11/mia-moore-small-stuff/ ) ” for more on this critical relationship attribute. Another relationship tip: If you treat your partner like the king or queen they deserve to be treated as, and consider them to be a king or queen in your mind, you will manifest this into reality. Human psychic energy is real, as proven by the work of Dr. Bruce Lipton, author of The Biology of Belief (e.g. walking into a conference room and sensing low energy, and arriving to a party and becoming enveloped in the positive energy.) Consider that your brain knows no difference between what is real and what is imagined, so envision an ideal relationship and true transformation is possible. We end with Wendy describing what’s in store for the Mating Matters show, enjoy this blurb: Hosted by psychologist and relationship guru, Dr. Wendy Walsh, Mating Matters explores the secret evolutionary motivation for virtually every human behavior. We are here to reproduce and behind everything is a desire to increase our mating opportunity. Season 1 looks at how concealed fertility has created the sexual double standard, why high testosterone men may be lousy husbands, why religions make rules around sex and how dating apps bio-hack your brain. Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/the-get-over-yourself-podcast/donations Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

*Today, I’ll be sharing some amazingly effective and extremely thought-provoking insights about interpersonal relationships from true experts in their field. From parenting to friendship to how to deal with your partner on days when you have zero patience, there are definite Do’s and Don’ts to consider when it comes to how you communicate and treat the people closest to you.* Luckily, I’ve had the pleasure of having relationship expert (and Time magazine’s Co-Person of the year in 2017!) Dr. Wendy Walsh on Get Over Yourself twice (see show #1 here ( https://www.bradkearns.com/2018/10/02/wendywalsh/ ) and show #2 here ( https://www.bradkearns.com/2019/01/21/wendywalsh-2/ ) ). Wendy is an evolutionary psychologist and a true trailblazer who also hosts her own podcast called Mating Matters ( https://www.iheart.com/podcast/85-mating-matters-with-dr-wend-30467953/ ). And, like John Gray ( https://www.bradkearns.com/2019/02/15/johngray/#1537804290528-70f55232-6bc6 ) , Wendy is aware of the contrast between how little we have evolved biologically and how much gender roles have seriously evolved over time. In this show, you’ll learn *the three things a man looks for in a woman* (big surprise, #1 is youth and beauty) and *the three things women look for in a man* , as well as why wearing perfume can actually sabotage your chances of attracting a mate! I’ll also touch on why *emotional self-sufficiency is key* and the *four attributes of winning relationships* as defined by Wendy, the first one being *physical attraction*. Turns out nothing can replace having good ‘ol fashioned chemistry with someone! And while most people tend to assume that that “spark” that you and your partner first experience in the beginning of your relationship is simply not sustainable long-term, then you’re in for a big surprise. This show will teach you why Dr. John Gottman says it is possible to preserve that romantic spark between you and your partner years down the line, and the actions you can take to ensure this. I’ll also talk about *the (inverse) power of praise when it comes to parenting* your children, why it is important to step away from the “helicopter” parenting trend and not coddle your kids too much, as well as the specific thing my son said to me that really opened my eyes and perspective on parenting. You’ll learn *what causes children to be “metabolically and medically accelerated” into adulthood* and start to develop diseases like Type 2 Diabetes, fatty liver, and high cholesterol, and *why downtime is incredibly important.* While it is good for your kids to have activities they enjoy doing, it is never a good idea for them to be constantly busy, distracted, and stimulated. Believe it or not, daydreaming and play are not a waste of time, but in fact, the opposite. I wrap up the show by using a golfing metaphor to describe the balance of the parent-child dynamic, and talk about the importance of setting boundaries for your kids, as well as how you can balance letting go of the need to control your children’s lives while also offering unconditional love and support. Thanks for listening, and stay tuned for more expert advice in part 2 of this episode! *TIMESTAMPS:* This show is about interpersonal relationships starting with Dr. Wendy Walsh who describes what men and women want from one another. [06:11] The roles have changed so much for men and women in today’s society. [09:11] Men’s criteria to look for in a woman is youth and beauty, loyalty, and kindness. [10:40] Women look for resources, intelligence, and kindness. [13:40] What are the four attributes of a winning relationship? [16:35] Studies have shown that the natural scent that a person gives off has much to do with the attraction. [18:24] Learn to express yourself with loving kindness. [19:31] Empathy is number three on the list for making a good relationship. [21:38] Impulse control goes hand in hand with emotional regulation. [22:18] As highly motivated parents, we often push our children to start acting like adults. [22:58] Even in the most affluent populations, people still suffer from FOMO. [24:24] The high stress life of trying to give the kids every opportunity, has accelerated the development of diseases in children that were not appearing in children years ago. [27:18] Take a deep breath, relax, sit back and let your kid discover the world with them in the driver’s seat. [30:31] *LINKS:* * Brad’s Shopping page ( http://www.bradkearns.com/shop/ ) * Podbean ( https://www.podbean.com/podcast-app-iphone-android-mobile ) * Bradkearns.com ( https://www.bradkearns.com/ ) * Podcast with Dr. Wendy Walsh ( https://www.bradkearns.com/2019/01/21/wendywalsh-2/ ) * Mating Matters ( https://www.iheart.com/podcast/85-mating-matters-with-dr-wend-30467953/ ) * Cultural Health Solutions ( https://www.culturalhealthsolutions.com/ ) * Podcast with Dr. John Gray ( https://www.bradkearns.com/2020/07/28/healing-strained-relationships-with-increased-self-awareness-hopeful-new-strategies-and-fake-it-till-you-make-it/ ) * Gottman Institute ( https://www.gottman.com/ ) * Medium.com ( https://medium.com/ ) * Ben Greenfield ( https://bengreenfieldfitness.com/podcast/lifestyle-podcasts/how-to-be-boundless/ ) *Join Brad for more fun on:* Instagram: @bradkearns1 ( https://www.instagram.com/bradkearns1/ ) Facebook: @bradkearnsjumphigh ( https://www.facebook.com/bradkearnsjumphigh ) Twitter: @bradleykearns ( https://twitter.com/bradleykearns ) YouTube: @BradKearns ( https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4XXEoULD0AiiuPHdRw-Efg ) We appreciate all feedback, and questions for Q&A shows, emailed to getoveryourselfpodcast@gmail.com. If you have a moment, please share an episode you like with a quick text message, or leave a review on your podcast app. Thank you! Check out each of these companies because they are absolutely awesome or they wouldn’t occupy this revered space. Seriously, Brad won’t sell out to anyone if he doesn’t love the product. Ask anyone. * Almost Heaven Sauna ( http://almostheaven.com/ ) : Affordable at-home sauna kits for the ultimate relaxation and hormonal boost on demand * Brad’s Macadamia Masterpiece: ( http://bradventures.com/ ) Mind-blowing, life-changing nut butter blend * CAR.O.L bike: ( http://carolfitai.com/ ) Cardiovascular optimized logic stationary bike for a highly effective eight-minute workout * Male Optimization Formula with Organs (MOFO): ( http://bradkearns.com/mofo ) Optimize testosterone naturally with 100% grassfed animal organ supplement * Perfect Keto: ( http://perfectketo.com/ ) The cleanest, purest, most potent ketone supplements and snacks * LetsGetChecked ( http://lgc.com/brad ) : At-home medical testing with great prices, quick results, and no hassles * Vuori Activewear: ( http://vuori.com/ ) The most comfortable, functional, and fashionable gear, evoking the chill SoCal coastal lifestyle *Donations* ! ( https://app.redcircle.com/shows/db49934a-7fb1-4002-b81a-c97adbb869a6/donations ) This free podcast offering is a team effort from Brad, Daniel, Siena, Gail, TJ, Vuk, RedCircle, our awesome guests, and our incredibly cool advertising partners. We are now poised and proud to *double dip* by both soliciting a donation ( https://app.redcircle.com/shows/db49934a-7fb1-4002-b81a-c97adbb869a6/donations ) and having you listen to ads! If you wanna cough up a few bucks to salute the show, we really appreciate it and will use the funds wisely for continued excellence. Go big (whatever that means to you…) and we’ll send you a free jar of Brad’s Macadamia Masterpiece ( http://bradventures.com/ ) as a thank you! Email ( getoveryourselfpodcast@gmail.com ) to alert us! Choose to donate now ( https://app.redcircle.com/shows/db49934a-7fb1-4002-b81a-c97adbb869a6/donations ) , later ( https://app.redcircle.com/shows/db49934a-7fb1-4002-b81a-c97adbb869a6/donations ) , or never. Either way, we thank you for choosing from the first two options! :] Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/the-get-over-yourself-podcast/donations Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

*Get ready for another fast-moving, hard-hitting show with Dr. Wendy Walsh! Dr. Wendy is back for a third appearance to break down all the reasons why healing attachment wounds is integral to a healthy and successful relationship, and as always, brings her fresh and spicy perspective to the table as we discuss all things related to dating and relationships.* In this episode, we confront the possibility that you (and all of us) are replaying a story of relationship dysfunction, get to the bottom of where this repetitive dysfunction is stemming from, and learn a practical, step-by-step approach for healing the root of these issues. Some key takeaways from this conversation with Dr. Wendy: * Relationships are less about luck than they are about skill: “It’s not about finding the right mate, it’s becoming the right mate.” * A solid couple that lasts a long time is based on three things: 1.) Sociology (what the dating apps look for; what somebody looks like on paper) 2.) Biology (whether your pheromones are a good match) 3.) Psychology (mainly relating to early life attachments) * The most vulnerable period of a person’s life are ages 0-3. This is because you are preverbal, so you can’t process events, especially painful events, like a story. This is why this time is so critical for development. * You can absolutely change your attachment style in life, and a huge part of that is choosing a partner that does not feel familiar. * A relationship is an “exchange of care.” * “Our unconscious processes in our early life experiences shape our personality and dominate our behavior through the lifespan.” * “Someone who has a secure attachment style can give and receive care equally.” * Dr. Wendy has a favorite metaphor for personal growth: “You’re walking down the street, you don’t see a hole, and you fall in that hole. That’s the level that most people are operating at. But when you decide, I’m going to make a change and I’m going to grow and understand. So then, Stage Two is, you’re walking down the street, and now, you see the hole! And you fall in it. Stage Three is when you walk down the street, you see that hole, and you very carefully use your mind to step around that hole. And Stage Four? You take a different street. And that’s how attachment injuries and so many other physiological injuries get healed.” Catch up with Dr. Wendy’s podcast, Mating Matters , here ( https://www.iheart.com/podcast/139-dr-wendy-walsh-27538440/ ) , and if you missed her first two appearances on the podcast, click here ( https://www.bradkearns.com/2018/10/02/wendywalsh/ ) for the first show, Evolutionary Psychology Applied To Modern Love, and here ( https://www.bradkearns.com/2019/01/21/wendywalsh-2/ ) for the second show on Successful Long-Term Relationships, Gratitude, Positive Attitudes, Healthy Parenting, The Future of Humanity, and Matters of Mating. *TIMESTAMPS:* Brad introduces Dr. Wendy who talks about how the injuries from early childhood influence your choice of partners. [01:35] Four relationship attributes are physical attraction, emotional regulation, empathy, and impulse control. [04:38] Why don’t dating apps include negatives along with the positives? [06:04] What is the chemical process of attraction? [07:31] If your own psychological attachment styles are not a good match, you're going to have problems. [09:38] Women place far less emphasis on looks because they’re more tuned to go for intelligence, which is often showcased through humor. [10:27] What is attachment theory? We form kind of a blueprint for love based on the kind of attachment we had with our primary caregivers. [12:34] What works is: See it. Realize it. Understand it and process it from your emotional brain. [16:13] The one common denominator in a relationship and is you! [21:35] We subconsciously seek a person representing our loving experience from childhood. [22:12] Some people say therapy is reparenting. [24:02] Your parent-child relationships can be a do-over for you, the parent. [26:34] What is the difference between somebody with a secure attachment and somebody who’s avoidant and just physically there? [27:43] In long-term relationships, couples therapy is important because everyone is constantly growing and changing and you need to learn to accommodate. [32:35] In an emotionally fused relationship, it is not about time spent, it’s about mental energy space. [37:12] When questioning, if this is too much work, the best thing to do is to go to personal therapy and learn your part of the interaction. [38:21] You could have unrealistic expectations about being a perfect person or an expectation of what love is. [39:50] Kids are little sponges. They know what’s going on. [41:35] *LINKS:* * Brad’s Shopping Page ( http://www.bradkearns.com/shop/ ) * Wendy Walsh ( https://www.drwendywalsh.com/ ) * Mating Matters ( https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/mating-matters/id1451843580 ) * Wendy Walsh Podcast with Brad ( https://www.bradkearns.com/2019/01/21/wendywalsh-2/ ) * Harry Harlow Monkey Study ( https://www.psychologicalscience.org/publications/observer/obsonline/harlows-classic-studies-revealed-the-importance-of-maternal-contact.html ) * Venn Diagram ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Venn_diagram#:~:text=A%20Venn%20diagram,%20also%20called,as%20regions%20inside%20closed%20curves. ) *QUOTES:* * “At the end of the day, we are wired to bond….there are so many mental and physical health benefits of being able to show yourself to somebody in an intimate way.” * “Relationships are a Venn diagram: they’re two circles overlapping. And if the circles are too close, you get a fused relationship, where nobody can remember whose problem is whose. But if they are too autonomous and separate, then there is no intimacy. So you want to keep a good chunk of your circle, your sense of self, your autonomy, growing — so you have something to bring back in to the relationship.” Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/the-get-over-yourself-podcast/donations Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands