Three tenets of the church of HockeySport: Pettersson is secretly both Sedin twins, Putin replaced the cup with a replica, and the NHL needs hot, black ice.
Welcome to The HockeySport Podcast first and hopefully last playoff predictions episode! Win your hockey pool, impress your friends and re-mortgage your condo (I did!) on these can't miss prognostications. We go through ever team in the NHL's 242nd annual "Tournament for that Sweet Bowl®". We've travelled from the Salty Lakes of Quebec City to the vast water-starved deserts of Scottsdale Arizona to thumb the pulse of the hockey world. So join us as we dissect: The new, better, more fuckable Ryan Smith Quebecers rejoice, your team has returned! Scratch that, the Mormons called dibs, sorry Quebec Joson Robertson, local hero (Boston sucks) And introducing the Banff BANFF, and their mascot THE BANFF And one or two more things maybe. I dunno
The HockeySport Podcast is broadcasting LIVE from YXX, gate 23a. Be there with us at the exact moment that Phil Kessel touches down into Canuck land and hear what hockey's greatest Phil-ride thinks of about the jewel of the Fraser Valley! We've got wall-to-wall coverage of everything PHIL! Plus, the in-depth and totally not-deranged coverage of the hockey world you've come to expect. This episode, we'll be deep diving into: BC's weed-fueled super-youngsters How to fix the Columbus Blue Jackets with only minimal scaldings The definitive word on the #Freetheskate initiative. We promise A Mike Modano story that is timely and very relevant AND... The shocking proof the Quinn Hughes is in fact, super Canadian So save up your 2042 first round picks, because this is a podcast that won't take the inevitable swallowing up of coastal North America by climate induced sea-level-rise for an answer!
Welcome to the HockeySport Podcast All-star weekend extravaganza! We're are the only podcast that isn't broadcasting from Toronto, because we made a promise to our listens and we keep our word. This episode, we unpack the most important stories in hockey, nay, the world! So join us as we discuss the new all-star skills format, the PWHL's flagrant east-coast bias, and a million more stories directly pandering to you, the best fans in the world. And, don't miss our endless Fan-Votes! Note: this episode must be listened to only once the Oilers win streak is over. Hide it away and uncork it when joy is back in the world and the birds once again sing. It's the only way out of this hell.
Brought to you in league-mandated adherence to board of governors' adopted corporate values, it's the HockeySport Podcast! In this heavily redacted episode, your loyal hosts will be covering all the biggest stories of the 2023-24 NHL regular season. And for the first time ever, this episode is 100% guaranteed to not stand for or believe in anything. No causes, no special jerseys and certainly no acts of dissent against the all powerful authority of the NHL! So buckle in for league approved stories, including: The utopic post-racism society that the NHL has created through a mere pinch Orwellian doublethink The Oilers 100% definite and fully deserved path from last place to Stanley Cup glory The annual rounding up and quartering of the cowards and traitors Jim Rutherford and Patrik Allvin clapping bombs and breaking knees with special guest, the unnamed threatening muscle of the National Hockey League!
Thank you for attending our First Annual "Welcome New Fans Symposium". It's so great to see new fans from Las Vegas, Raleigh, Dallas, and Sunrise who have made the trip. The NHL is so so so very happy you're here and ready to become Hockey's newest super fans! Don't forget to wear your I.D. badges and we'd like to kindly remind our friends from Vegas either lay of that Sweet Nevada Cactus or at least pass that shit around. This symposium will cover all the hottest stories that a fresh-faced new fan needs to know, including: Does the Stanley Cup really exist? Should we ever talk about Bedard again or is he dead to us? The Top 7 most dastardly plans by the NHL's resident super villain, Alex Pietrangelo 5 Tech tips for Refs struggling to get back to their home screen on their iPads And, due to a clerical error, we completely forgot to talk about the Maple Leafs, so don't tune in for that if that's what your looking for.
This is your chance to join the HockeySport Podcast's various letter writing campaigns to fix the NHL one tea stained parchment at a time. In this, our 39th episode spectacular, we'll be sending handwritten, tear stained notes to all your favourite stars, including: Gary Bettman (and anyone with the name or email Gary Bettman) Ryan Reynolds, owner of the sooner to be re-relocated Ottawa Canucks (Trust us this will work) Blake Lively Future Connor Bedard teammate Rasmus Andersson Bo Horvat (MLS® Number: R2754679) The Boston Bruins' Mascot "The Villain" 2011 Conn Smyth Winner Raffi Torres
The HockeySport Podcast is proud to present the world's first hockey podcast written entirely by Chat_DMT. This episode we tackle all the latest issues in the hockey world and all of the hockey world that we're late to tackle. Including: "The Rise and Fall of the Third Atlanta Franchise" "The Vancouver Canucks; history's worst built tank" "The Staal Brothers: famously against dudes in pairs" "Key regular season's statistics that will matter in the playoffs. (Hint: there are none)" "What did we all do deserve this Bruins team?" Plus, one lucky listener will win a .zip file or e-transfer of all our unreleased, unrecorded episodes! So, come break on through with us on a wild recap of the hockey world that is sure to give you acid flashbacks for years to come.
What's the secret to eternal life? Boiled Hotdogs, Milk in Bags, and T3 lines. At least that's according to the fittest and most everlasting NHL players. Join us for our senior citizen special, dedicated to the immortal and still kicking-ass Steve Wochy, who's 99 years young! On this episode of the HockeySport Podcast, we've got health tips from Chara, Marchand, Kessel and all the other players that are going to somehow outlive you. We dive into the NHL Trade Deadline, The Calgary Flames unlikely mascot (who isn't a human torch) and the Arizona Coyotes new home at the Arizona State University Library's Applebee's! Plus the Olympics happened, finally answering the age old question of "if a tree falls in the woods but it doesn't have NHL players, does it make a sound". Plus, we might mention the Canucks once or constantly! Enjoy.
Are you an NHL player bummed to be missing your chance at Olympic glory? Follow our easy step-by-step guide to joining your brethren on Team Canada and bringing home the Gold. And all you have to do is be dead for a little while! Plus 6 other brilliant options for deceiving the NHL that will leave Gary Bettman scratching his head while your biting on gold (cause they do that for some reason). Plus we dive deep into the world of HockeySport, with thrilling, clickable, flavor-packed stories, including: "The New York Islanders: Better or Worse than the dumpster fire 2012 LA Kings?" "Are the Oilers Copying the Flames by Copying the Canucks?" "7 nice compliments for the 7 shittiest, most embarrassing, laughing-stock teams in the NHL" "Expectations soar! The Canucks five-peat could become a seven-peat" And so so much more more!
When there's shocking breaking news in the world of the Canucks, we're there to bring you all the details. When that shocking breaking news turn out to be a load of progandic bollocks, you better believe we'll be the only one's bringing you the truth. Don't believe your eyes or your ears, Jim Benning is still the GM of the Vancouver Canucks. In this *emergency pod*, we're covering all the ups and downs in the craziest week in Canuck, nay, NHL history. Bruce Boudreau (sp?) is in, Travis Green is out. Jim Benning is out, but still controlling everything from a shadowy realm no other journalsportists dare to tread. Join us if you dare.
Join us for our least stressful episode yet! How could you possibly be stressed about the 2021-22 NHL season when you have our assurances that the Canucks will and in some sense already have brought home the Stanley cup. So Relax. Don't stress. Close your eyes. Breath in, buy out. Breath in, buy out. It's all going to work out. The Canucks will win the Cup this year. Give in to the Borg Amalgamation that is the Columbus Blue Jackets. Follow your Captain Phillip Kessel. Fear not the Con-air Mc-David, who has certainly peaked. Think not of the Lightning, for they have been relegated. Stress not about the Kraken, for they have been moved to Honolulu. The Canuck five-peat starts now. Chant with us: Oliverekmanlarsson. Oliverekmanlarsson. Grab a Danish and enjoy our newest episode.
You ask, we deliver - it's our Fantasy Playoff Preview! The number one question we get, (besides where can I buy what you two are smoking?) is “what are your fantasy hockey predictions?? Well hold onto you beards, it's finally happening. Everything you need to know about the world of Fantasy hockey. And what a strange mythical world it is. Saddle-up and join us as we go series by series and discuss: How will the Avalanche get past Jason Biggington and The Blues? What's the over-under of Marchand-Chara licks per 60? Can any amount of trained Panthers stop and back-from-the-dead Kucherov? Top 3 films from Sean Avery's new and thriving porn company. And to top it off, a breakdown of the North division so in-depth you'll be frozen solid with ice cold Canadian hockey knowledge. Stay tuned!
With the playoffs right around the corner, we've got the full rundown of everything you need to know about all the playoff teams. You heard right, we're not going to talk about the Canucks. No sir. We've really branched out. Full coverage! We promise. Okay, maybe a little about the Canucks. But then it's straight into the team fighting for Lord Stanley's mug! That's all we care about and we're bringing it right to you. All eyes on the playoff teams. Full steam ahead! Islanders. Wild. Hurricanes. Yessir. We're dying to talk about the #Canes. Try and stop us! Full playoff coverage or your money back! Brace yourselves for too much information about the Canes. You ever heard of Teuvo Teräväinen? Cause we sure have. You're going to be screaming "please stop saying such interesting things about Teuvo Teräväinen". But we won't stop. We're that commited. You're welcome. But first up Canucks vs. Flames
Breaking down all your favourite traitors, it's our trade deadline, totally-not-belated special. And we can guarantee this year's tradepocalypse deadline special has %50 less trades and %50 more %50 retained salaries! Join us as we finally determine which team found that crucial missing piece on their way to Stanley Cup glory. Could it be: Anthony Mantha to the Florida Manthers Erik Good-trade-son showing that he can still bring that 7th round magic Adam Gaudette giving everyone BC Bud lover plenty of reasons to get highmore San Jose poised to bring the cup the Cayman Islands for the first time and the Toronto Maple Leafs falling horribly short in the coveted Ben-Hutton-sweep-stakes They tell us every year that this is the trade deadline, and yet every year, here we are. Now pray to god with us that this is our last trade deadline episode. For Gaudette's sake. End it.
For the first time ever, we are broadcasting live during both the Canucks' offseason and the trade deadline. Every Canucks fans' two favourite times of year happening at once! And just because it's been a busy deadline with rumours flying everywhere doesn't mean we're not going shut everything the fuck down. We're covering all the biggest stories on Canada's 3rd favourite holiday, the trade deadline. Stay tuned for hard hitting stories, such as: The Flames core-swap and stylish new toupee Why does Taylor Hall like losing so much? The Leafs seeking their team's first ever Stanley Cup Waves of uncontrollable panic The return of the 2011 Canucks And a friendly reminder that the Canucks are done. The Franchise is over. The league is going to fold. Nothing matters. Enjoy the episode!
With rampant crime at an all-time high in the NHL, the HockeySport Podcast is the long hard slew-foot of the law this league desperately needs. Join us as we bring the biggest criminals in the NHL to justice, busting wide open huge cases including: The Binnington Attempted Murders The Sutter Gene Cloning Scandal The Sidney Crosby Ponzi Scheme The Numerous bizarre criminal acts of the Florida Men on the Panthers and Lightning The Blackhawks Breaking and Entering the Playoff Race The Buffalo Sabres missing person case It's our crime … and subsequent possible punishment special! And as always, Jake Virtanen! Because he's ALWAYS been here. And, as you know, all work and no play makes Jake an untradable apparition doomed to haunt the Canucks for eternity.
Wait! Wait! Don't unsubscribe! Hear us out. We may just be the Canucks last hope. Join us in the latest episode of the HockeySport Podcast as we go full villain in a last ditch effort to restore balance in the HockeySport universe. Heroically broadcasting amidst devastating Canuck disappointment and autocratic assassination attempts, the HockeySport Hosts are back to discuss the most contentious NHL season in recorded history. Get up to date in the world of HockeySport with these daring acts of JournalSport, including: Which dictator's kill lists are we on now Adding up Jake Virtanen's No. 5 Orange bar tab Reviewing Vancouver's newest radio station: 1040 Traffic The best hockey inspired dishes to serve at the parties you better not be having right now Completely skipping over the Laine-Dubois trade More rehashing of the 2011 Stanley Cup Final The Seattle Kraken's Leaked New Mascot: “Big Red Salmon the Big Red Salmon” All this, and maybe one or two other good segments, but even that's generous, let's be honest.
Welcome to the new and improved Dupont Chemicals™ HockeySport Podcast, presented by our benevolent sponsor Dupont Chemicals™. All the insightful and groundbreaking hockey coverage, now pest and weed resistant! Broadcasting from a remote undisclosed location in the New Scotia North™ Division, the HockeySport team is back for Season 4 of our medical mal-practice award winning series. Join Dan and Steve as the voyage into the strange and unknown world of Pandemic Regular Season Hockey, diving into the most unsterilized stories gripping the hockeysport world, including: What's in Evander Kane's taxes? Which Canadian Team's roster will ascend to political office by the end of the season? Why is Buffalo taking a year off and setting up a home dartboard? How does Joe Thornton even wear a mask? Plus, say hello to this week's guest, Dallas Star Captain Jamie Benn.
The HockeySport Podcast is back. We took a hiatus for much of 2020, which we spent, you guessed it, travelling the world spreading the love of hockey! But now we're back by popular demand (of the ministry of health of Bolivia) and ready hit the 2021 NHL season like a 104° fever. In this exclusive teaser episode, hosts Dan and Steve send the year 2020 into the shallow unmarked grave that it deserves. Join them as they explain why exactly 2020 sucked for every single team (except The Sabres for obvious reasons). We'll cover all of the hottest issues in the world of Hockey, including: Are the Flames the new 2015 Canucks? Now that the Bruins are done, will they relocate? Is it possible to have sympathy for the Blackhawks? Do we have to pay attention to the 3 other NHL divisions? Will Vegas ever recover from their P.T.S.Demko? And remember, this is just a teaser. So get ready to be teased, you noodle-armed little weiner-mobile.
Are we dead? Is this heaven? Well it can't be heaven because the Bruins are here, but we'll take it. It's time for the first ever Summer-Playoff-Pandemic-Bubble HockeySport Podcast. Who else is down to do this every year? Join the HockeySport Hosts on a Wild journey through the Playoffifying rounds. We can guarantee all our predictions for the qualifying rounds will (and have already) come true or your money back. So sit back in your isolated, hermetically sealed hockey bubbles because we're hot on the trail of the stories that matter to you, such as: What type of poison does Matthew Tkachuk use on his skate blades? Which of Matt Duchene's many curses is most evil? Who did Tim Horton have to kill to get to the top? Does Quinn Hughes have braces? What can't Chris Tanev break with his one remaining tooth? And… are we still talking about milk? And don't forget to enter our contest to win a sarcastic pre-recorded shout out, cause you're soooo greeaaaaat and you toooootally deserve it.
It's day 700 in our hermetically sealed underground virus bunker and if anyone have survived out there, spirits are high! We're getting very close to a cure, or at least time travel, to bring Hockeysport back to you all, and we're certainly not losing our minds or, you know, flying off the Handle of the Train, off its rails, while thinking outside the Boxcar (as they say). This episode we cover everything you'd expect in a post-hockopcalyptic wasteland, including; Brendan-Brayden-Broden Leipsic (whatever his name is), which teams are getting relocated to Quebec city and Atlanta, and which oilers haven't been to jail (number 6 will shock you). Plus, our simple plan for how the NHL can still save the season and finally expand to Antarctica for the 16-on-16 death match the fans deserve. With our special guest, the king of all trophies, and first in our hearts, the Presidents Trophy.
Sound the alarms. Seal air locks. Grab every piece of hockey memorabilia you can carry and get in your Repurposed Lockout Bombshelter. The NHL is cancelled. The Playoffs are cancelled. Any reason to live is cancelled. But the show must go on, COVID or NO-VID. Join your hosts in the HockeySport Emergency Virus Bunker (patent pending), safely broadcasting from 30 feet below the charred hellscape of the hockey world. The season ended on a cliffhanger, but we've got all the answers. Including: What do you need in your Virus Bunker to get you through a barren hockey-less future. What happened to Joe Thornton's Last Chance. Who's the most bummed (other than the Oilers obviously) And of course, we determine who will win the Stanley Cup. And stay tuned, cause if we don't post again in the next couple days, we've certainly suffocated.
You asked for it and we deliver. This is our Annual Columbus Blues Jackets Special! Broadcasting live from the great tumbleweed marshes of Ohio, where the summer's are long and full of freedom. Dan and Steve, and our guest host Nick Cannon, will dive deep into the history, lore and legends of the NHL's 28th most successful franchise. But that's not all! Featuring habit-forming stories from around a chaotic, narcotic NHL, including: Who needs to take a take some salvia and chill and why is it Jack Eichel? The Flyers: Still the worst team in NHL History How product placement will effect the careers of Pepsi Presents McDavid and Kleenex Ultra Soft Tissues Presents Draisaitl One incredible Diss-covery that could forever alter the career of Boston Matthews The Top 10 Dancing Vids from Jordan Binnington's TikTok Account 23 thing you wish you didn't know about Latvia All the Ohio S**t* *uckeyes ranked So, load your cannons full of Bees, take a debilitating bong toke and lets break through in the (Daniel Sedin) 22nd Episode of the HockeySport Podcast.
We are at WAR! There's no exaggeration, just brutal armed conflict that threatens to tear up the world's geo-political order with HockeySport solely to blame. We go across the globe this episode, starting with the World Junior Championship's role in the Iran-U.S. conflict, jetting to Quebec to expose Ilya Kovalchuk's plot to install a KHL team in Quebec City and finally to where ever Jim Montgomery is right now. But have no fear, for the HockeySport world has heroes like Kes, O.J., Cup-of-noodle and even No Dog. And if they fail (which they almost certainly will) and least we've got our (corporate sponsor) "Health". So sit back, pour a glass of Kale Beet Juice, and unclench your stress away.
In the 20th episode of the HockeySport Podcast, we're setting an example for the HockeySport world and going coachless. No Coach, no rules, no racism. That's our promise for this episode. Buckle up for a 12 hour bad-mood hate-fest in our Coachless Corner, sponsored by Cherry-Grape Energy Drank. With a bounty of stories to put you in a bad mood, including: “How to make Taylor Hall stay”, “Which Pokemon would be the best HockeySport player”, and “How did the Canucks get so Focht?” Plus, tweet at @hockeysportpod to enter our “Spell Johnny Goodreaux's last name” contest to win a brand new New New Jersey Jersey Devils Jersey. With special bad-mood guests, fellow podcasters Kevin Bieksa and Ryan Kesler
Tonight we serve up the perfect pairing to wet your appetite for a new season of HockeySport. With the threat of a Lockpocalypse set aside and our Lock-out bomb shelters emptied, it's time to treat yourself to a sampling of the finer things from the bounty that is the NHL regular season. On special today, may we suggest a decanted Marleau, a 6oz of finely aged Zuccarello or perhaps Draisaitl? Each pair perfectly with our roasted Zibanejad fresh off the Teravainen, with shaved Pekka Rinne. For dessert, sumptuous Clip-Bait stories that will leave you semi-satisfied like never before, including: “How the Egyptians invented hockey by melting sand”, “Toronto's new expansion team, the Toronto Clowns”, “Grammy Winner Georges Laraque's New Single, Feat. Lundqvist”, “Trevor Linden: The Beloved Murderer” So strap yourself into your Blimp-boni, because it's going to be a wild, delicious ride.
Refreshed and rested after their annual summer hibernation, The HockeySport Team is ready to bring you up to date after an off-season full of selfies in Fiji with Zemgus Girgenson, Brad Marchand in a basket rolling down an Egyptian river, and highlight reel saves by the NHL's newest star goaltender: Pete Buttigieg. We're starting off the new year with hard hitting questions, such as: “Was it worth it St. Louis?” and “Did San Jose just disprove the existence of God?”. Plus, to our soul listener Terland, we're sure you'll love our interview with Ryan what's-his-nuts B-list O'Reilly AND: Giveaway Alert! Free Canucks Brandings! The first 500 fans to stop by the HockeySport Studios will receive a complimentary NHL Hot Iron Branding on their face, neck or chest.
It's the long awaited Series Finale of the NHL, and after a season that makes you wonder “Can't we just have another lockout already”, we're excited to see how they tie up all those loose ends. After 102 seasons of cliff hangers and wild fan theories, tonight we at last find out whether anyone can stop the Zombie Chara Mountain, whether Claude Giroux will ever win elected office, and who the hell is Noel Acciari. This and so much more in the finale Episode of NHL hockey ever. Plus, we're giving you exactly what you came here for: an endless supply of explicitly detailed erotic Fan Fiction, mostly about San Jose Shark players. Available now for the first time our our new website, HockeyPornPorncast.net.
In an episode that will have you asking yourself: “Should I be mad”, The HockeySport Podcast finally puts the 28 vanquished NHL teams six feet under ground where they belong. A lot has happened in the HockeySport world and I'm sure you'll agree when we say, “It got weird”. So listen in and we'll add to your Hockey vocabulary with new glossary terms such as Probaboolity, Devafenestrated, Shandor Alphonso and the four magic words that will get you through any hockey conversation: “Analytics, Possession, Colton Parayko”. Plus, watch the host's slow decent into madness reach its grotesque conclusion as they become that which they hate the most: Bruins Fans.
The HockeySport hosts are going through rigorous psychoanalysis after witnessing a spree of fatal chokings around the NHL. Join us for heartfelt eulogies for all the fallen teams, mass-grave-style! Plus, dive into our subconscious in this playoff special, complete with enough shocking revelations to send you to the therapy penalty box. We're breaking news about today hottest issues, including Kucherov's shocking realization that he was adopted, the release of the full, unreacted Kirk Muller Report and Werner Herzog's bleak window into Johnny Gaudreau's soul. Our first ever episode with no questions is sure to give you all the answers. With special guest, Barclay “Johnny Hockey” Goodrow.
Prepare yourself for the first episode of the HockeySport Podcast presented in glorious 2D. That‘s twice the dimensions for the price of none! Join the team on this visual spectacular and help us dig through the twisted carnage of this NHL HockeySport Postseason. The season has is first set of casualties, and it's time to deliver the Eulogy and hang the gravestones in the rafters for the teams we lost this season. Plus, exclusive exposés on why the cup needs to get taller, our picks for our March Madness Elementary School bracket, and how GM's can motivate their player by ransoming family members. All brought to you, as always, with extreme prejudice. With special guest, broadcasting legend Bob Cole.
Despite their best efforts, the HSP hosts avoided being dealt at the trade deadline and are back in an episode that critics have called “formless”, “Inaccurate” and “a textbook example of the failings of the Canadian public school system”. So buckle up and waive your no-trade clause as we hit the NOS on this Zamboni in our first ever episode with no backsies, no warranties and NO RULES. We dive in, team by team, hitting the biggest stories of the post-tradedeadline world, including: Is Ottawa putting together a perfect (tank) season, why do players always break the day after their warrantee expires, and is Edmonton finally not funny? Plus, don't forget to sketch us to win. The most flattering portrait wins stickers!
#12: Blood Thirsty Buffa-lo Riders Broadcasting live from Ulrich's Tavern in beautiful lakeside Buffalo, New York, The HockeySport Podcast present our sexiest, nerdiest, Buffaloest episode ever. Proving once and for all that we are not, and have never been, fully-toothed bandwagon riders, this episode is jam packed with everything huge Buffalo Sabres fans like ourselves could want. So join us as we present a total of *REDACTED* incredible Zamboni stories, our exclusive expose of Sex, Drugs and Rockn'Roll in the NHL and a thorough yet uncalled-for verbal tour of the Florence of Erie County: Buffalo, New York. Plus, premium listeners will now have exclusive access to the full HockeySport experience; with all the footage we normally edit out, including stuttering, belching and instantly regretted utterances.
With the legacy of the NHL in ever-growing turmoil and the future uncertain, hosts Dan and Steve lay out their succession plans for the future heirs to the HockeySport Podcast and set out a surefire plan for Canada's Manifest Hockey Destiny, starting with a KHL team in Quebec City and a Canadian Teams in Detroit, Minnesota and Glendale, Arizona. However, no legacy can ever be secure while at least five of Gary Bettman's Horcruxes remain at large and un-destroyed. But never fear, as we enter the 11th installment into our 1700 part HockeySport series, anything could happen (except Luongo winning the cup, which is expressly forbidden). So sit back and mail us your BOO signs as we unveil an exclusive clip from the hot new TV show, ‘Jeers: The Gary Bettman Sitcom”
Recently hailed as the Nostradam-ICE of the HockeySport world, our hosts Daniel Doheny and Stephen Morgan will take you through all the stories that the league's vast state-media apparatus doesn't want you to know. Including: the Leafs' quest for their first cup in franchise history, how to call the Ottawa Senators Trade-Line without ending up with Bobby Ryan, and why it's okay to love fighting in hockey, even though everyone knows its fake. Plus, in an exclusive HockeySport Top5, we finally settle the debate of who are the best Anunnaki Lizard players in the league today. So roll your eyes into the back of your head and relax your bowels, cause we're doing the thinking now. Kindly brought to you by our sponsor: Persephone Brewing's “Hayley Wickenheiser Golden Ale”
Season 2 Exclusive: The World Premier of ‘Ice Jam' and the launch of HockeySports' five film Ice Jam Cinematic Universe: The CineJam. Coming soon to theaters, Jumbotrons and bittorrent sites near you. Follow all the action as we kick off Season 2 of the HockeySport Podcast with hard hitting JournalSport stories, including: an in depth, at length discussion about why we're not discussing Preseason hockey, our exposé of the rampant outbreak of blackmail in the GM community, and we settle once and for all who's got the most cha-ching clicky-bling bling; Sidney Crosby or Alex Ovechkin. We're giving you so much HockeySport you'll be able to hear it calling in the air to night, so hold on. And stay tuned for this week's guest, Club 16 co-founder and ClearlyContacts.ca fan, Trevor Linden Brought to you by our proud sponsor, the all new scent: Hot Black Ice by HockeySport
The only doctor recommended remedy to sooth the unrelenting swells of existential self-doubt that is the NHL off-season. This episode, we answer the age old question: what happens to a Podcast without facts during of time without news? Join us as we decide which Karlsson can stay and which Karlsson has to go, who Ovechkin will be presenting the cup to next season, and what is precise weight-bearing capacity of Barry Trotz's Laurels. Plus, in our hard-hitting deep dive sections, we track down Patient Zero of the epidemic that is suddenly afflicting the NHL: stacked teams of overpaid sell-outs. And we premier our three-part series about the misunderstood town of Fuckshit, New Hampshire and their beloved hockey team, the FuckShit Nuggets (brought to you by WNYC). And for the love of god, let us know if anyone has seen Paul Kariya. We're really worried.
It's our Year-End Spectacular, breaking down the Washington Capitals reality-fissuring victory over a hockeysport world that seemed beyond hope. Has this grim timeline finally been course-corrected or could the league simply be more rigged than ever?! And don't touch that dial, because in our first ever HockeySport Morning Show we take a deep dive look into our book of the month, Mike Modano's ‘Mo NinerNiner', discuss plans for ‘National Humiliation Day' and learn where Dan and Steve wouldn't bring the Stanley Cup. Plus, the world exclusive debut of Canada's newest “Heritage Minute', guaranteed to bring a tear to the eye of any syrup-blooded listener in the hockeysport world So take a knee with us as we sadly, but somehow gladly, close out the 2017-18 NHL season. Joined live in studio by special guest: Elias Klinkholm
After an extended hiatus in the witness protection program, the HockeySport team has been drawn out of hiding by the allure of Stanley's great silver Bowl. Seeing all that's gone wrong in the HockeySport world, the hosts wouldn't take "your former legal identities no longer exist" for an answer. Join us for this long awaited deep dive into the stories no one's been asking for, such as: Who's got the best playoff pubes? Will Brad Marchand ever find love? Are the Sedin's twin's pulling a classic bait n' switch? And who is Elias Klinkholm? Bringing you our first episode tailor made for all our fans out there suffering from synesthesia, anesthesia or just simply on fire. As always, with your hosts, Cliff Alliford and Mabel Gardiner, living life by the motto: “You can't drink all day if you don't start... 100% of the shots you don't take”. With Special Guest: Boston Bruin and single-ready-to-mingle Brad Marchand.
In this episode, we tackle the biggest unanswered questions in HockeySport history, including: Are all Swedish people secretly twins? Is Jaromir Jagr truly dead? Should the HockeySport Podcast have Moore jokes or less jokes? Why should we care about HockeySport when the sun will eventually envelope the earth and the universe will succumb to heat death in the end anyways? And as always, write us in, or send us an owl. You'll get a mug, or be Perma-Zammed. With Special Guest: to go over the guys' Olympic roster predictions, Team Canada GM Sean Burke.
Our celebration of Canada's Hockey supremacy is cut dreadfully short by a whirlwind of anti-Canadian conspiracy and lies reaching the highest levels of the HockeySport world. Uncovering truth behind the rapid desertification of the league, the near-inevitable relocation of Canada's political system to Houston and how systematic extortion and blackmail have ensured that “the house always wins” in Vegas. And stay tuned as we announce the first ever NHL All-Name Team, unveil our “Be-Your-Own-Beer” sponsorship package and introduce you to the giant rich babies coming to your team next year. With Special Guest: Blue Jackets center and NHL All-Name Team captain Boone Jenner
We find ourselves in a dark unlikely reality where Vegas is a conference leader, Marchand is a cup champion, Messier is a trophy and the HockeyHosts are forbidden from talking about the Canucks. We also check in on yet another cursed Winter Classic, catch up with some of our favourite NHL Alumni in our “Where are they now” section and find what Gary Bettman is getting for Christmas (Hint: It'll be an offer he can't refuse) With Special Guest Live in Studio: Former Canucks head coach Guest John Tortorello
The League is in turmoil this week as players, owners, commissioners square off after heated controversies have unfolded. In a week full of shocking revelations, including hot mic audio of salary collusion, krytonian performance de-hancing drugs, and devastating 100 foot goals, it seems all but undeniable that we are heading towards an inevitable civil war in the NHL. Plus, you won't believe the stories we're NOT talking about. (#2 will knock your skates off). With special guest: recently retired Ottawa Senators legend Chris Neil.
Episode #1: Expansion Cousins of the Las Vegas Onion Knights Our world debut podcast covers literally everything in the world of HockeySport: including the Edmonton Oilers' Faustian Bargain, how to improve 3on3 with only minimal gunshot wounds, what Ryan Kesler should apologize and resign for this time, and why Bobby Orr is a huge fraud. Now with as few references to the year 2011 as humanly possible! With special guest interview with Artem Anisimov of the Chicago Blackhawks
© 2020-2025 Ivy Podcast Discovery LLC
