Podcasts about forgiving what you can't forget

Guest Natalie Kuntz and Deb finish their series on discussing the book Forgiving What You Can't Forget by Lysa Terkeurst. They discuss that living in forgiveness is actually possible. Bonus material. Finish with someone and know that you can have freedom in forgiveness. 

Guest Natalie Kuntz and Deb discuss chapters 12 and 13 in the series discussing the book Forgiving What You Can't Forget by Lysa Terkeurst. Forgiveness means dealing with loss and bitterness that looms in our hearts. How do we do that and become healthier? Take a listen and find out.

Guest Natalie Kuntz and Deb discuss chapter 11 in Forgiving What You Can't Forget by Lysa Terkeurst. Before we forgive others, do we need to first forgive God? We talk about renovating our emotional house. What does that mean? Take a listen and find out.

Deb and Natalie continue in chapter 8 of Forgiving What You Can't Forget by Lysa Terkeurst. How does one find hope in forgiveness when the unchangeable feels unforgiveable? A great discussion and honest thoughts in the journey of forgiveness.

This episode challenges us to not only look at our past, but evaluating it and correcting it so we can change our future. Deb and Natalie Kuntz continue in the book review of Forgiving What You Can't Forget by Lysa Terkeurst and discuss what role forgiving those who have wounded us will change our future.

How do our past behaviors and experiences impact our decision making today? Does it impact our ability to forgive? In this chapter of Forgiving What You Can't Forget, Natalie and Deb explore the idea of "connecting the dots" in seeking to understand ourselves better. 

How is going back and collecting the "dots" of our story helpful in forgiveness? Join Deb and Natalie as they explore this idea as they continue in their book series "Forgiving What You Can't Forget" by Lysa Tercheurst. 

Join Deb and Natalie as they continue on the book review of Forgiving What You Can't Forget. This is chapter 4 of Lysa Terkeurst's book, plus much more added content to help you process and think through your hurts and wounds. Plus, Deb always high lights a new resource to read, listen to, or watch. Join us as we journey through those hurts that seem so unforgiveable.

Deb and Natalie continue in their book review of Forgiving What You Can't Forget by Lysa Terkeurst. It explores the idea of our pain and if we can even survive it. Packed with tons of extra content and lessons from their own lives, Deb and Natalie delve into this topic of forgiveness and take a hard look at this question. 

Forgiving What You Can't Forget Pt. 2   We're discussing part two of forgiving what you can't forget and continuing to talk about the fourfold path to forgiveness. These references come from Desmond and Mpho Tutu's book The Book on Forgiving. It's an incredible book; so well written. When I read this book, it was like a really kind, sweet, older gentleman, uncle, grandpa, that kind of person, who was just, loves you through his words. That's the best way that I can describe it. It's such a compassionate, gentle book, but with powerful truths.    Step 2 - Name the Hurt The next step in the fourfold path to forgiveness is naming the hurt. It's one thing for you to tell the story. For example, this thing happened to me,  my husband was unfaithful, my wife depleted our bank account, whatever the situation is. But it's another thing for you to then name the hurt for you to actually get real about what was lost. What did you lose when that thing happened? Get real specific about that. I've had quite a few things happen in my life that have caused me grief, and I've just kind of moved on. Now, that's not to say that I haven't grieved at all, but if I'm honest, I probably skipped some steps because I don't like to feel sad. I don't like feeling sorrow. I don't like to think about loss. So to really be honest and real with myself about the fact that I really lost something there takes a lot of work. It takes a lot of honesty.    It takes a lot of vulnerability to just sit with that and to realize that some of the things that you lost, you can never get back. If you were, God forbid, sexually assaulted as a child, you lost your innocence, and you won't be able to get that back. Now, that does not mean that you're damaged goods. It doesn't mean that your life is over and you're somehow always going to be walking around with a scarlet A on your forehead. Absolutely not. But it does mean that you have to acknowledge that something was lost. So a part of naming the hurt is super important because it allows you to stop pretending or minimizing what happened. It's one thing to, again, be general, I was hurt, I was betrayed, I was let down. It's another thing to say, this is the hurt. I lost my confidence, I lost my security, I lost the closeness that I felt with that person. I lost my safety, I lost my savings. Whatever it might be, whatever was lost. It's important that you're able to name that and not just the tangible things, but the Nontangibles. That's super important that we're able to do that. Be specific about what it is that you lost.    Good Grief There's another book, and I'll link to this in the show notes of this podcast. It's called Good Grief by Granger Westburg. I read this book back in 2008 after my best friend passed away from breast cancer, and I've talked about this before on the show. I've told you just now that I'm not the greatest at dealing with grief. So I had to start seeing a grief counselor because I could not move on. Now, obviously, you're dealing with a very significant loss, like people expect you to grieve for a while, right? But this was different. It wasn't like I was in denial. I knew that she had died, but it really affected me in ways that I did not know what to do with. And so I started seeing a grief counselor. And that was one of the best decisions that I ever did because I think had I not started seeing that grief counselor, I probably would have just masked it under some religious jargon, like, “Oh, she's in glory, bless the Lord.” That's not what we need to do when we are going through loss and pain. We don't need to mask it in some religious ideology.    ALSO LISTEN TO EP. 47: GRIEVING WITH HOPE    Step 3 - Granting Forgiveness Step three is granting forgiveness. Now, I say this a lot, and I'm going to say it again, that forgiveness is both a choice and a process. You are not always going to feel like forgiving. And forgiveness is not just something as easy as just like, I forgive you. Okay, let's move on. It starts off as a choice, but then you have to work it out as a process. These four steps that I'm giving you today is the process, or a process. So when I tell you that you need to grant forgiveness, it is a choice. You have to get to a point where you realize that when you withhold forgiveness from someone, you're truly only hurting yourself in the long run.    Scientific studies have shown what unforgiveness does to the human body. Our bodies were not meant to hold on to unforgiveness. Your body was not meant to hold on to unforgiveness. You were not created to hold that much pain, to absorb that much trauma unhealed. So when you choose not to forgive, you're choosing to stay stuck in your trauma and in your shame, and in your pain. I tweeted this years ago. It's not my original tweet, but “Holding on to unforgiveness is like drinking poison, expecting the other person to die.” Some of the people that we are not forgiving have gone on about their lives, and they are not thinking about you at all. They're not thinking about what they did. They're not thinking about your hurt. They're not thinking about anything. They are living their best life, and you're the one stuck in the trauma. How do you get out of it? Well, you choose to forgive them.    Forgiveness is also not something that they earn. Forgiveness is a gift. They don't have to ever ask you for an apology. I know that's hard to hear because we want that. We need that. It's like, wait a minute, you hurt me. You need to apologize. And the truth is, in a perfect world, absolutely that would work. But not everybody's going to apologize. Maybe they don't think that what they did was wrong. Maybe they're a jerk. So maybe that person has died and they'll never be able to acknowledge what they did. They'll never be able to apologize. And this is why forgiveness is not predicated on someone asking for an apology. Forgiveness is simply a choice that you make. It's what you choose to do. I choose to forgive you, even if you're unworthy. Even if you never ask for my forgiveness. Even if you don't think you did anything wrong. This is hard. You all easier said than done. I get it. I get it. But when you choose to forgive, you release yourself. Yeah, you release that person, but you really release yourself. You release yourself from them having to pay you back for whatever they did. Forgiveness is a gift. And I think one of the things that really helps us to forgive others is realizing that we have been forgiven.   When we realize that we're humans, and I know that sounds so oversimplified, like everyone's human, but truthfully, we have done things to others that we didn't intend to do. We have hurt other people. We have caused people pain. And sometimes we meant to and sometimes we didn't. So when we're able to get in touch with that side of ourselves, with our humanity, then it gives us grace for other people. It gives us compassion for other people. Even when they hurt us, it gives us empathy for other people.    Forgiving Keeps Your Heart Tender Maybe you need to forgive yourself. Maybe you've done something that is just so horrible and you've not forgiven yourself. It's time for you to put yourself in the forgiveness box. It's time for you to give yourself some grace, some compassion, some empathy. And that is what happens when we choose to forgive. We set ourselves free. We set the other person free. Ephesians 4:32, one of my favorite scriptures, says, “Be kind one to another, tender-hearted forgiving one another, even as God, for Christ's sakes, has forgiven you.” Think about that. Tenderhearted. When you forgive, you keep your heart tender. You see when you choose to hold on to unforgiveness, it makes your heart hard and calloused.    And you wonder why you can't love. You wonder why you can't bond. You wonder why there's a wall up between you and other people. It's because when you hold on to unforgiveness, it hardens you. It embitters you. But when you're able to forgive, you have a tender heart. You keep your heart soft and pliable and flexible. Maybe you think but then people are going to hurt you again. Maybe they will. But I'd rather have a tender heart that's open to love and that's open to accepting people and living with others with all of their weaknesses, all of their flaws, all of their insecurities, and mine vs being this hardened, tough person who's trying to protect myself from all the hurts in the world. Because guess what, friend? You can live like that all you want. And people are still going to figure out a way to hurt you. So you may as well live with a tender heart.    Step 4 - Renew or Release the Relationship    Step four is to renew or release the relationship. This is an important conversation here because there is a difference between forgiveness and reconciliation. There are some relationships that are not going to be able to be reconciled. Like I said earlier, there might be people in your life who have died. You can't be reconciled with them. There might be people in your life who are completely unsafe, and I've had to do that with some people. I will offer forgiveness, but we will not have a relationship. I'm not going to be bitter. I'm not going to egg your house. I'm not going to pray for your demise, but we will not be reconciled, and that is okay. You want to use those situations sparsely. You don't want that to be your M.O. for everybody. You don't want that to be how you treat people. But the truth is, there are some relationships that can be renewed. In Thrive Relationship Coaching, we talk about how to actually restore your relationships, but then even with that, I understand that there are going to be some relationships that are not going to be able to be restored.   There are some relationships that aren't going to be able to be restored, but there are many relationships that can be. So how do you know the difference? How do I know if this relationship can be restored or if I need to be able to release it? Repentance? Is that person truly repentant? Are they willing to make repairs? If they're not willing to make repairs and if they're not repentant, well, then that leaves you with your answer.    To Forget or Not Forget?   Yes, there are times that you can wipe the slate clean, when have chosen to forgive. It's then that you need to start over and wipe the slate clean. This is what it means to “keep no record of wrongs,” like it says in 1 Corinthians 13. This does not mean that love allows you to just be taken advantage of or that love never brings up wrongs. It said, keeps no record, meaning that you're not always throwing in the face something that your spouse or whoever did to you. So when you decide your relationship can be repaired, renewed, or restored, it's time to wipe the slate clean. Next, you do what the Bible teaches in Philippians 3: “forget what lies behind and you press forward to what lies ahead.”   Now, the title of this episode is Forgiving What You Can't Forget. So am I contradicting myself? No. And neither is the word of God when it says forgetting what lies behind. God knows that we're human beings and we're not going to technically forget. But it means that you no longer focus on that thing. That thing is in your rearview mirror. So just like you driving down the street and you see some houses and some fields and some cars. When you pass those things, those things are in your past, they're done. You're probably not going to keep staring in your rearview mirror because then guess what? You'll miss everything that's in front of you. That's how healthy relationships work. Once you forgive, now it's behind you. That doesn't mean that you'll never think about it. That doesn't mean that you won't even sometimes reach back in the past to help other people with your story as I said earlier. But it does mean that you're no longer harping on that thing. You're no longer focusing on it. It's not tripping you up anymore. You're choosing to let the past be the past, and you're choosing to press ahead to what lies ahead in the future. And if you're not able to do that, then that relationship is not going to be restored or repaired.    Release the Hurt   So this brings us to our final point here, which is forgiveness is about releasing. It's about releasing the hurt. So just like we named the hurt, now it's about releasing the hurt. Just like you confronted the person, now it's about releasing the person. Just like you had to tell your story, now it's about releasing that story so that you can now tell a different story.   God has used our story to bless many, many marriages so that they could know that there is truly nothing that you will go through in your marriage that God can't fix and heal so long as you're willing to do the work. And this is why we end every episode by saying that a good relationship is not one that works. A good relationship is one where you put in the work. You've got to put in the work. There's no magic wand fairy dust that God's doing for some people and not for others. That's not how it works. If you're willing to do the work, if you're willing to go through this process of forgiveness that we've talked about, anything can work.   If you're ready to do the work of restoring your relationship, schedule your discovery call with me at http://danache.com/getstarted.    Links Mentioned in this Episode    Episode 149: Forgiving What You Can't Forget - Pt. 1 Episode 116: Love Keeps No Record of Wrongs - with Dr. J. Calvin Tibbs     SUBSCRIBE | SHARE | RATE | COMMENT To ensure you never miss an episode, be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Google Play, Spotify, Stitcher, iHeart Radio, or wherever you listen to podcasts. Remember, sharing is caring! So, share these episodes with your friends and family via email or social media.  See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Join Katherine and her dear friend, Lysa TerKeurst, as she shares how, while the last several years of her life have been some of the hardest - filled with pain and heartbreak, she has seen God move in astounding ways.  Lysa TerKeurst is a New York Times bestselling author of more than 25 books with more than 6 million books in print. Her most recent books include Good Boundaries and Goodbyes, Forgiving What You Can't Forget, and It's Not Supposed to Be This Way. She is president and chief visionary officer of Proverbs 31 Ministries and has a social media reach of more than 8 million followers. Lysa writes from her family's farm table in North Carolina. Connect with Lysa at: Lysa's Website Proverbs 31 Ministries Therapy and Theology Check out Lysa's newest devotional, You're Going to Make It.  Other resources:  Therapy & Theology Episode on Divorce: Moving on When Your Marriage Doesn't   To learn more about Hope Heals, you can find us at: www.hopeheals.com www.mendcoffee.org www.hopehealscamp.com www.instagram.com/hopeheals

Forgiving What You Can't Forget - Pt. 1   Today we are going to go a little deep. We're going to do a little bit of excavation into your heart, perhaps to pull out some old memories that you would prefer to stay tucked away. We are going to go after the cover-up that you have put over some of those wounds, and we're going to make sure that what you have forgiven is really, indeed healed. For some, you're listening to this episode today on forgiveness, because you haven't been able to forgive. You haven't been able to move on, and you need somebody to help you out. After this and next week's episode, you will have a blueprint on how to get over what was done to you, how to forgive, and move on.  The title of this episode is forgiving what you can't forget. And I know that we have so much to talk about, so I've actually split this episode up into two separate episodes. So we're going to talk about part one today and then next week join us because we are going to finish up with part two.   Everybody Needs to Learn How to Forgive If there is one thing that I know for sure as a marriage coach, as a pastor, as a woman, and as a human being, it is that we all are going to have to walk through forgiveness at some point or another. You could have the most perfect marriage, the most healthy relationship, the best friendship, you name it, but at some point because you are in a relationship with another human being, you're going to be hurt and you are going to hurt.  We need to understand that forgiveness isn't something that just really resilient strong people do. It isn't something that only struggling relationships have to go through. We all have to learn how to forgive. And the more that you do it, the easier it gets. So as I look back over my life, I can think of many people whom I've really had to forgive, really struggled to forgive. And here's the truth. The closer the person is to you, the harder it is to forgive. Because the people that are closest to us have the most ability or the greatest ability to hurt us the deepest. If I'm just upset with my coworker because they ate my lunch that I put in the refrigerator, well, I mean, I have to forgive that. But it's not like the end of the world versus if I have to forgive my husband who betrayed my trust. So regardless of who came to your mind, regardless of whom you're thinking about, what I'm going to share with you over these next two episodes is going to be completely applicable.    The Inspiration Behind Forgiving What You Can't Forget This episode is not intended to be a therapeutic session. It is not intended to be a full-out coaching session, even though coaching obviously will help you. And I do work with all of my clients on this process of forgiveness. Lysa TerKeurst, President of Proverbs 31 Women wrote a book called Forgiving What You Can't Forget. If you know anything about her story, Lysa was married for nearly 30 years to a man who was a habitual cheater. And her lifestyle is very public, especially for those in the Christian community. Many Christian women know who Lysa TerKeurst is as she has a very prominent ministry. She has lived this whole debacle out in the public eye. I have nothing but respect for her. I did a YouTube video on this very topic of her story on forgiveness about how I applauded her, really, for leaving this very toxic marriage.  You all know me. I am for marriage. I am pro-marriage. I don't take divorce lightly at all. But in her situation, she was married to a man who she had given grace upon grace upon grace upon grace, chance after chance after chance after chance. They publicly renewed their wedding vows, and this man committed to being faithful and loyal and he wasn't. So she finally made the decision that she was going to need to walk away. And I know that that took a lot of courage. I'm sure that there are people who probably disagreed with her decision, and I'm sure that it was really like a battle within herself to even get to that point. But through her pain, she wrote this book called Forgiving What You Can't Forget, and that is really what inspired, obviously, the title of this podcast.    Recommended Books on Forgiveness Another book I'm going to recommend to you is called The Book on Forgiving by Desmond Tutu and his daughter Mpho Tutu. Obviously, those are African names. This is such a good book. I originally got this book, I don't know, maybe three years ago. I think it was like right at the start of COVID. This book is really about a lot of what Desmond experienced coming out of apartheid and how he learned how to forgive. But it's not just the apartheid story, because most of us have not had that experience. But he really teaches about these tenets of forgiveness. And one of the most profound things, I think, that I have probably ever read in my whole life was out of this book. He talks about the fourfold path to forgiveness.    The Fourfold Path to Forgiveness  Today I'm going to teach something that I've never taught before, and it is this whole fourfold path to forgiveness. So the first thing, let me actually give you all four. And then, like I said, we're going to introduce this topic today and then we're going to continue this next week on this fourfold path. The first thing that you're going to want to do is tell your story. The second thing is to name the hurt. The third thing is to grant forgiveness. And then the last thing is to renew or release the relationship.   When Is the Process of Forgiveness Complete? What does it look like when the process of forgiveness is complete? How do you know if you've really forgiven someone? I get asked that question a lot. One of the things that I always say is, first of all, you'll know when the process of forgiveness is complete when you can think about that memory and it no longer stings, it no longer burns. Let's say I burned myself with a curling iron, which I have many, many times, especially when I was a little kid. Not knowing what I was doing curling my hair. So I have a scar from the burn. If I look at that scar, then I remember exactly what happened there. I'm like, oh, yeah, I was eight years old. I was curling my hair in the bathroom at my house and felt the singe. I felt that thing on my neck.  So I can think back to that memory. But if I touch that scar, it no longer hurts, it no longer burns, there's nothing oozing. It's completely healed. Likewise, my friend, when you think back over that memory, whatever happened, you think of that person and there's nothing that oozes emotionally. There's no more pain, there's no more stinging. That's when you know that the process of forgiveness is complete.  I've written about forgiveness, even shared on an earlier podcast episode about forgiveness, and I've given lots of tips throughout many other episodes on this podcast on forgiveness. I talk about forgiveness so much because it a necessary in a healthy marriage or relationship. You simply cannot build a connection or commitment without learning how to forgive. I hope the lessons you hear in today's episode jumpstarts your journey on the path of forgiveness and may you learn to forgive the things you can't forget.  ALSO LISTEN TO: The Power of Forgiveness in Relationships: Release Them, Restore You   Links Mentioned in this Episode  The Book on Forgiving by Desmond Tutu Forgiving What You Can't Forget by Lysa TerKeurst Episode 18: How to Love Your Spouse When You Don't Like Your Spouse    SUBSCRIBE | SHARE | RATE | COMMENT To ensure you never miss an episode, be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Google Play, Spotify, Stitcher, iHeart Radio, or wherever you listen to podcasts. Remember, sharing is caring! So, share these episodes with your friends and family via email or social media.See omny.fm/listener for privacy information.

A new book review series over the book Forgiving What You Can't Forget by Lysa Terkuerst. Join with me and my friend Natalie Kuntz as we journey through this book review. Is forgiveness a dirty word? Hmm, something to think about as we all desire it but struggle to give it. In this review we search our souls and walk through the hard things together. Join us on this journey. 

In today's podcast, Stasi enjoys a conversation with best-selling author Lysa TerKeurst as they discuss Lysa's new devotional, You're Going to Make It, and her desire to offer others a healing rhythm of receiving from God and releasing to God when in a season of suffering. Friends, God is after our true hearts, and we are safe to be honest with him. He will meet us in our tears and ache, offering us hope for today. With God, healing is possible, and we're going to make it.…..SHOW NOTES:…..VERSES: Mark 14:34 (NIV) — “My soul is overwhelmed with sorrow to the point of death,” he said to them. …” Mark 14:36 (NIV) — “Abba, Father,” he said, “everything is possible for you. Take this cup from me. Yet not what I will, but what you will.”…..LYSA TERKEURST BIO:Lysa TerKeurst is a New York Times bestselling author of more than 25 books with more than 6 million books in print. Her most recent books include Good Boundaries and Goodbyes, Forgiving What You Can't Forget, and It's Not Supposed to Be This Way. She is president and chief visionary officer of Proverbs 31 Ministries and has a social media reach of more than 8 million followers. Lysa writes from her family's farm table in North Carolina.Website: LysaTerKeurst.comInstagram: instagram.com/lysaterkeurstFacebook: facebook.com/OfficialLysaTwitter: twitter.com/lysaterkeurst Proverbs 31 Ministries: proverbs31.orgLysa's Devotional releasing March 28, 2023: You're Going to Make It: 50 Morning and Evening Devotions to Unrush Your Mind, Uncomplicate Your Heart, and Experience Healing Today…..OTHER RESOURCES:Experiencing God by Henry T. Blackaby, Richard Blackaby, and Claude V. KingVictory Over the Darkness by Dr. Neil T. Anderson…..Don't Miss Out on the Next Episode – Subscribe for FreeSubscribe using your favorite podcast app:Apple PodcastsSpotifyGoogle PodcastsAmazon Music & Audible

Today we read “Forgiving What You Can't Forget” by Luda Terkeurst. We read pages 1-5 and we are going to find the nuggets God is showing us. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/niki-batie/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/niki-batie/support

Lysa TerKeurst is a New York Times bestselling author of more than 25 books with more than 6 million books in print. Her most recent books include Good Boundaries and Goodbyes, Forgiving What You Can't Forget, and It's Not Supposed to Be This Way. She is president of Proverbs 31 Ministries and has a social media reach of more than 8 million followers. Lysa writes from her family's farm table in North Carolina. Follow Bob: @bobgoff Follow Kim: @kimberly.stuart.writes Follow Lysa: @lysaterkeurst Learn more about Lysa and purchase her latest books: lysaterkeurst.com

Several years ago we had Lysa TerKeurst on our show and discussed not confusing the desire for peace with the disease to please. Today, Lysa joins us again for a deep conversation about learning to set good boundaries and where she notices her struggle to maintain them.   “It's not that I don't want to be clear,” Lysa says, “it's that sometimes I care so much about what the other person is feeling, that I forget it's not my job to own their feelings or manage their feelings. It's my job to be kind but clear. It's their job to manage their feelings.”  Listen as Lysa demonstrates the immense amount of work she has done over the past few years to establish solid boundaries and find groundedness as an Enneagram Nine. ---------------- Lysa TerKeurst is a New York Times bestselling author of more than 25 books with more than 6 million books in print. Her most recent books include Good Boundaries and Goodbyes, Forgiving What You Can't Forget, and It's Not Supposed to Be This Way. She is president and chief visionary officer of Proverbs 31 Ministries. Lysa writes from her family's farm table in North Carolina. In her recent book, Good Boundaries and Goodbyes, Lysa helps you stop the dysfunction of unhealthy relationships by showing you biblical ways to set boundaries--and, when necessary, say goodbye--without losing the best of who you are. To learn more about Lysa visit her website or follow her on social @LysaTerkeurst and @Proverbs31Ministries.   Hear similar episodes here: Lysa TerKeurst episode in 2019, Panel of Nines, Type 9s with Beatrice Chestnut, Andy Gullahorn on Forming Own Opinions  

Do you ever wonder if boundaries are unloving or selfish? Do you have trouble deciding if it's time to bring closure or continue to work on a relationship? What does the Bible even say about relationships when they become unsafe or unsustainable? Then, once you discern it's time for change, how do you set boundaries? Based on our stories, our wirings, and our theology, we can get confused and stuck - and even lead others to paralysis.  Our guest today, Lysa TerKeurst, deeply understands these hard questions in the midst of relational struggles. But after thousands of hours of counseling intensives and extensive theological research that transformed the way she defines healthy relationships, Lysa is now more committed than ever to loving people well without losing the best of who she is.    Lysa TerKeurst is president of Proverbs 31 Ministries and the author of more than twenty-five books, including  It's Not Supposed to Be This Way and the #1 New York Times bestsellers Forgiving What You Can't Forget and Uninvited. Her new release, coming this month (Nov 2022) is titled, Good Boundaries and Goodbyes; Loving Others Without Losing The Best of Who You Are.  As president of Proverbs 31 Ministries, Lysa and her team have led millions to make their walk with God an invigorating journey through Encouragement For Today daily devotions, the First 5 Bible study app, online Bible studies, The Proverbs 31 Ministries Podcast, social media channels, speaker/writer training, and more. Each year, Lysa speaks at more than 40 events across North America. She has a passion for equipping women to share their stories for God's glory through Proverbs 31 Ministries' annual She Speaks Conference and through the ministry's membership site for writers, COMPEL Training.   Lysa has 5 grown kids with families of their own, and 3 beautiful grandchildren.    To connect with Lysa TerKeurst, visit: ONLINE  https://lysaterkeurst.com/   SOCIAL   Facebook - @LysaTerKeurst Twitter - @LysaTerKeurst Instagram - @LysaTerKeurst   BOOKS   New Release - Good Boundaries and Goodbyes; Loving Others Without Losing The Best of Who You Are (Nelson Books, imprint of Thomas Nelson, 11/8/2022) https://www.p31bookstore.com/collections/lysa-terkeurst-books-and-bible-studies Being a leader isn't easy. Being a wholehearted leader means learning how to have healthy boundaries and modeling that to all who follow you - from your kids, to employees, to your followers online. If you want to know more about how to grow as a wholehearted leader and learn more about our resources, check out www.livingwholehearted.com or follow us on instagram @living_wholehearted.   And for all you moms of daughters, this very topic is one of the reasons Terra started Courageous Girls. We have groups of moms and daughters gathering all over the world as moms are intentionally pursuing their daughter's heart and helping her understand God's word and how it applies to building healthy relationships with God, herself and others. This conversation is woven throughout those lessons starting from second grade through high school. You can learn more at www.mycourageousgirls.com.  Subscribe to the #living_wholeheartedpodcast anywhere you find your podcasts  To connect with Jeff and Terra Mattson and Living Wholehearted, go to: Instagram @TerraMattson @Living_Wholehearted @MyCourageousGirls #living_wholeheartedpodcast  #shrinkingtheintegritygap Facebook @MyCourageousGirls @WeAreLivingWholehearted Websites LivingWholehearted.com TerraMattson.com MyCourageousGirls.com MyCourageousBook.com   Resources Shrinking the Integrity Gap  https://davidccook.org/shrinking-integrity-gap-book/ Shrinking the Integrity Gap e-Course  https://www.livingwholeheartedstore.com/e-courses Courageous: Being Daughters Rooted in Grace https://mycourageousgirls.com/shop/p/book-courageous-being-daughters-rooted-in-grace Dear Mattsons  https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLdPzQ_cUwCbRc-MQ40KL3a6ze06CiY38l Helping Moms Raise Confident Daughters  http://cpguides.org/

Welcome to the show! Today I welcome my dear friend, author, and fan-favorite, Lysa TerKeurst, for a very insightful (and much-needed) conversation about boundaries - how to make them and keep them. Be sure to listen in as Lysa honestly shares how we can stop the dysfunction of unhealthy relationships by showing us biblical ways to set boundaries without losing the best of who we are. At some point, Lysa realized she had many questions about boundaries and relationships. Lysa used these questions to dig deeper into God's Word to discover the many Scriptures that demonstrate that boundaries are not just a good idea but God's idea. So much wisdom is found in my time with Lysa today…. I promise you don't want to miss out on this eye-opening conversation! Lysa TerKeurst is president of Proverbs 31 Ministries and the author of more than twenty-five books, including Good Boundaries and Goodbyes: Loving Others Without Losing the Best of Who You Are, It's Not Supposed to Be This Way and the #1 New York Times bestsellers Forgiving What You Can't Forget and Uninvited. As a mother of five and Gigi to three, Lysa writes from her family's farm table and lives in North Carolina. Listen in to learn more about: Lysa's definition of boundaries includes these three words - Access. Responsibility & Consequences. Signs of a healthy relationship vs. an unhealthy relationship + some scripts we can use to communicate necessary boundaries in our lives. How boundaries are not about leaving people but about loving people with the best of who you are. Favorite quotes: ~Boundaries are not just a good idea, they are a God idea. He established the foundations of the world with boundaries. ~When we need someone to lift up their area of responsibility, if they don't have the desire within themself to change their level of responsibility and match the level of access you have given them, no amount of external pressure will create lasting changes in them. ~A boundary without a consequence is nothing but a bad suggestion.  ~The purpose of a boundary is not to shove people away.  The purpose of a boundary is to love others really well without losing the best of who we are. ~Anytime you feel like you have to minimize the best of who you are to help make excuses or cover up for the worst of who someone else is, that's not just a red flat that is a full on fire! Links to great things we discussed:  Free Coaching With Alli AWS Internship Program Application: Become an intern on Alli's team Lysa TerKeurst | Good Boundaries and Goodbyes: Loving Others Without Losing Adele - Easy On Me (Official Lyric Video) - YouTube Music The Chosen (TV Series 2017– ) - IMDb Dual Transformation: How to Reposition Today's Business While … Lessons in Chemistry: A Novel: Garmus, Bonnie - Amazon.com Mad Men (TV Series 2007–2015) - IMDb The Crown (TV Series 2016 - IMDb Yellowstone (TV Series 2018– ) - IMDb Join the Confident Motherhood Community here. Hope you loved this episode! Be sure to subscribe in iTunes and slap some stars on a review! :) xo, Alli 

Hey friends! We are starting a new series today called Boundaries, and as hard as boundaries may be for some of us, I really think you're going to enjoy these conversations. I'm starting off the series with my dear friend, Lysa Terkeurst. Lysa is no stranger to The Happy Hour, and I'm sure many of you know her name. She is an author and speaker, not to mention an impactful communicator of God's Word. Lysa recently wrote a book called Good Boundaries and Goodbyes, which I had the privilege and honor to endorse. Let me just say, you need to grab yourself a copy!In addition to talking about the new book, Lysa and I also have a discussion about the fact that people don't understand that it's perfectly okay to set healthy boundaries. We don't know when it's time to say goodbye, or what it truly means to love one another. And many of us have believed the lie that it's un-Christian to put boundaries in place. Lysa wrote Good Boundaries and Goodbyes as a follow up to another of her books. She realized after writing Forgiving What You Can't Forget that she needed to work on boundaries in her own life and get to the root issue of why she struggled to do so. Lysa says she was afraid to make boundaries because it could possibly disappoint people and they may walk away or stop providing what she thought only they could provide to make her feel okay in this world. Truth be told, when we set boundaries with people, sometimes it does upset them. But Lysa says, if we are afraid that someone is going to reject us or be upset with us, that person already had a high likelihood of eventually rejecting us one day. Boundaries aren't just a good idea; they're God's idea. Join me today for a great conversation with my friend, Lysa Terkeurst. Connect with JamieFacebook //  Instagram // YouTubeGET ALL THE LINKS FROM THE SHOW HERE

How do you forgive when the UNforgivable happens to you??? This is the journey Britt will take you on as she searches for that exact answer. Britt hopes that her pain can be used as a roadmap for you.  Wether you are dealing with lies, addictions or just trying to pick up your life after destruction this episode will be a great way to start looking for a free life that is full of bright happy days! Britt recommends 2 books in this podcast: Forgiving What You Can't Forget by Lysa Terkeurst Making Peace with Your Past by Tim Sledge

In this episode, Wendy and Candace chat about the myths we believe about forgiveness and truths on forgiveness that focus on building a healthier you! Listen in to hear how to forgive, why forgiveness is so good, and more from the Whole Mind. Mentioned in this episode: Forgiving What You Can't Forget by Lisa TerKeurst (on amazon here - https://www.google.com/search?q=lisa+terKeurst+fogiving+what+you+can%27t+forget&rlz=1C1GCEA_enUS842US842&oq=lisa+terKeurst+fogiving+what+you+can%27t+forget&aqs=chrome..69i57j46i13j0i13l5j0i22i30.20357j0j4&sourceid=chrome&ie=UTF-8 ) Pure Desire Podcast https://puredesire.org/podcasts/ The Forgiveness Factor by Pure Desire Ministries https://puredesire.org/shop/the-forgiveness-factor/ Pure Desire store where you can browse their material (Like Betrayal and Beyond material) https://puredesire.org/shop/

One of the best pieces of advice I've ever been given, that I want to give to you, is to ask people for feedback about y our own blind spots. And this plays into every domain of life, from finances to personal growth, and especially to relationships. And that's exactly the target we're going to hit today: the top relationship mistakes we make that we don't know we're making. Dave and Ann Wilson join us today. In addition to being my pastors and leaders, they're the bestselling authors of Vertical Marriage and the hosts of the nationally syndicated radio program, Family Life Today. This is their space, and to be honest, I don't think anyone talks about it like they do. If you enjoyed this episode with Dave and Ann, I'm sure you'll also enjoy: 222: Lysa TerKeurst on Forgiving What You Can't Forget 230: Rejection in Relationships, Sexual Shame, and Why You Shouldn't Kiss Dating Goodbye (feat. Kait Warman) Episode Links: Dave and Ann's Website | Instagram | Facebook | YouTube | Buy a copy of the book on Amazon! Subscribe to #WinTodayShow on YouTube. Join the conversation wherever hashtags are welcome using #WinTodayShow.

All of us have experienced pain in our past to one degree or another. The Marvel character, Wanda, has had tremendous trauma: from childhood loss and abuse to the death of her one true love. In the TV show WandaVision, we see her pass on this enormous pain to the people around her in an effort to cope with the trauma. Ellen, Daniel, and David unpack what they think God would say to Wanda…and to all of us who have past pain that is still affecting us and our current relationships. Join the conversation to find tremendous hope and practical strategies for your own journey. Isaiah 53:6, John 14:6, Hebrews 10:19-23, Isaiah 61, Romans 8:15-17, John 14:25-6 Total Forgiveness by R.T. Kendall, Forgiving What You Can't Forget by Lysa TerKeurst, Parenting by Paul David Trippamooninthedark.com

The Power of Prayer; Episode 1 Join me, Lisa Lorenzo, in this wonderful episode from Faith With Friends Podcast, a podcast that focuses on faith, relationships, and spiritual growth. Sara, Merari, and Maria “Conchi” join me today and have honest conversations about prayer, the power of prayer, and the tips on having a successful prayer life. Sara is in a wonderful marriage and blessed with three beautiful daughters. She is also a worship leader in her church. Conchi is the co-host of the Faith With Friends podcast. She was born in Miami has also been in love with Jesus since her teenage years. She loves reading, her latest book being, Winning the war against the mind. Merari is an amazing soul who is a prayer warrior who loves Jesus. Her latest prayer item has been praying for the husband. This episode will tell you more about our experiences in prayer, our greatest struggles in prayer life, and what we have learned about prayer over time. We will also encourage you with scriptures so that you can have a fruitful prayer life. In This Episode, You Will Learn About:  [00:25] Introduction to the show  [02:09] Struggles in prayer [06:12] What the Bible says about prayer [11:25] Relationship between a forgiving heart and prayer [14:25] The importance of prayer [17:07] What is prayer according to the Bible [19:17] Our motivation to consistency in prayer [29:03] Call to action for people who want to start a life of prayer [35:24] Words of encouragement about prayer  [38:32] A brief moment of prayer   Notable Quotes:  ●     Without God, it is impossible to please God ●      Sometimes our prayers are hindered because of the unforgiveness that we hold. ●      How you treat people matters to God. ●      Prayer is commanded by God. You ought to pray always.   Links: Books Mentioned: 1.   https://www.amazon.com/Winning-War-Your-Mind-Thinking/dp/0310362725 (Winning War Against the Mind) by Craig Groeschel 2.   https://www.amazon.com/Forgiving-What-You-Cant-Forget/dp/0718039874 (Forgiving What You Can't Forget) by Lysa Terkeurst Keywords: Power of prayer, Faith, faith in God, prayer, belief in God, how to pray, effective prayer life, struggles in prayer, Praying together.

This week, Taylor got to sit down with Amanda Chapman, the new worship director here at the church! They talk all about everyone's favorite topic... forgiveness! Why do we need to forgive people? What does the Bible say about forgiveness? Does someone have to apologize for us to forgive them? Tune in to find out! Here is a link to the book on forgiveness that Amanda mentioned: Forgiving What You Can't Forget by Lysa TerKeurst. https://www.amazon.com/Forgiving-What-You-Cant-Forget/dp/0718039874 Questions, concerns, or topic suggestions? Send us an email at askingforafriend@psbible.com. For more information about Park Springs Bible Church, visit psbible.com. (Alternate Titles: Where Does Forgiveness Start? What Does Forgiveness Look Like?)

It's far too easy to take things too seriously. It makes sense- life is intense, especially the long season we just went through. Even when we approach our dreams and ambitions- things that are actually designed to bring us more life, more joy, and more adventure- it's easy to slip into a mode of intensity that saps all the goodness from us. So what does it look like to return to joy, even amid working through the tough challenges and setbacks, too? I'm so happy to have my good friend Lysa TerKeurst on our podcast this week. Lysa is president of Proverbs 31 Ministries and the #1 New York Times' bestselling author of Seeing Beautiful Again: 50 Devotions to Find Redemption in Every Part of Your Story and Forgiving What You Can't Forget and It's Not Supposed to Be This. She writes from her gray farm table and lives with her family in North Carolina. Connect with her at LysaTerKeurst.com or on social media @LysaTerKeurst. On the episode: Producer : Tatave Abeshyan Producer & Co-host : Scott Schimmel JOIN BOB WEEKLY We've launched a new subscription-based offering with exclusive content from the one and only Bob Goff. In vintage Bob fashion, you can join him on his adventure of living a life of whimsy, love, and action. Each week you'll receive a video message from Bob, plus guided reflection exercises and activities for personal growth and structured conversations with friends. Now more than ever we need to look to voices we can trust. If Bob's message has inspired you in the past, you're not going to want to miss out on Bob Weekly. So sign up today and let Bob guide you as you go through this unpredictable thing called your life. Learn More bobgoff.com/weekly

Reading the book for Lysa Terkeurst, Forgiving What You Can't Forget & it's incredible. Sharing a few thoughts from reading, check out this episode --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/kenisha-ikener/support

Today I am joined by my sis Melissa Crawford, who is the President of the Godly Girl Inc. nonprofit organization. She talks with us about how to handle those who hurt us! Tune in, you won't regret it! Four things to keep in mind when responding vs. reacting are: Recognize, Resist, Realize, and Release Scriptural references: Romans 13:8; 1 Peter 4:8-9; John 13:34; Hebrews 12:14;Hebrews 12:15; Psalms 37:8;Romans 12:17-19; Colossians 3:12-13; Matthew 5:9; Matthew 5:23-25; Proverbs 17:14; John 14:27; Philippians 4:7 Resources Melissa wants the listeners to explore!! Reading- Some helpful bible plans are: How to Love People You Disagree With; Forgiving What You Can't Forget; Learn to Use Your Mouth Wisely. Additionally, the following books: Forgiving What you can't forget-talks about moving on and making peace with painful memories Emotional intelligence- explains the importance of emotions in your life and gives practical advice on how to improve you own emotional intelligence Relational intelligence- really helped examine the role people had in my life so I knew how to properly manage the relationship and address the issues. Journaling: Pastor Darius McClure talks about using the “Soul Care Strategy” when journaling. This technique has 4 prompting questions that have helped me tremendously during difficult to manage situations. 1. Expose your feelings: What do I feel? 2. Identify the Real Loss vs Perceived Loss: What did I really lose? 3. Expose the Lies: What is the enemy telling me? 4.Apply the truth=Scripture: What does God's word say Dont forget to follow us on social media!! Website: iamagodlygirl.com --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/velora-thomas/support

In this episode, Jenni's husband, Andrew Bolton sits down with Jenni and her dad, Tony Jessee to discuss their journey of forgiveness. Thirteen years ago, Tony had an affair on his wife and chose to leave their family, and it sent Jenni on a very long journey of navigating forgiveness. They share the impact of this decision, the ups and downs of reconciling and rebuilding their relationship, and how they were able to with God's power chose forgiveness, both as the one who inflicted the hurt and the one who received the hurt. Bitterness and holding onto the pain of how people have wronged us eventually chokes us out too, and the enemy wants us to stay here so we don't step into all God has for us. This is why forgiveness is such a big deal, because it frees us from the power the person who hurt us has over us and protects us from the enemy ways of keeping us in bondage. We reference Lisa Terkeurst's new book, "Forgiving What You Can't Forget" many times because it is such a power house resource for all things forgiveness. She spent a thousand hours researching forgiveness in the Bible, and breaks it down so beautifully in this book. You can get a copy anywhere books are sold, and we are going to give away a copy this week on Instagram @herfightclub. The most powerful truth in forgiveness is that regardless if the person who hurt you choses reconciliation, you can still experience redemption through Jesus. You are not alone in all of the pain, heartache, guilt, and shame today. We hope this episode leaves you feeling seen in all your pain, and empowers you to look to God's Word on your journey to forgiveness in God's Power.

Our marriage mini-series continues this week with a question we've all likely asked ourselves at some point in our lives: wouldn't I be better off alone? It's a question that creeps up on us in moments where we feel stuck, overwhelmed and disconnected from the person that matters most.    This week, Toni Nieuwhof joins me on the show to talk about those moments of doubt, guilt and worry that affect our relationships. She has worked with hundreds of families over the years, often as a divorce attorney, and she tells us what she's learned from those difficult experiences along with the important lessons she and her husband, Carey, have learned as they took their own marriage from unhappy to thriving.   In today's episode, Toni shares research-driven data, real-life examples and practical tools to transform struggling relationships into healthy, safe spaces. We also chat about her book, Before You Split: Find What You Really Want for the Future of Your Marriage, and she gives her best advice for fighting for the couple instead of yourself and how the light of Christ can help us identify self-limiting beliefs.    Some of my favorite moments from our conversation include:   1. The 5:1 ratio and its importance in our interactions with our spouse, significant others, and even our children.  2. How kindness and respect are essential pillars of the family space and how we can use them to change our family dynamic. 3. How our reliance on God and those we're in relationship with can help us become fully alive.   Favorite quotes: 1. Sometimes looking inside is scary. Or it feels painful. And yeah, there's some pain to go through, but if you can sit with it and not back away, and just move through that pain, there's just something so beautiful on the other side.2. The victim story you may be telling yourself is probably blurring your vision. 3. We had to come to the point where we could realize that the only emotions we can really try to influence or control are our own.   4. Just sit with your spouse's emotions and validate them, and accept them for what they are.  5. It's really hard when you're in the midst of the struggle to recognize just how much value your spouse has in the eyes of your child. Your child needs both of you.   Great things we discussed:  1. Toni Nieuwhof 2. Before You Split  3. Gratitude 4. Pride & Prejudice 5. Forgiving What You Can't Forget 6. Raw Hemp Seeds 7. Window Bird Feeder  8. Titanic  9. Gladiator  10. Standing Strong   Hope you loved this episode! Be sure to subscribe in iTunes and slap some stars on a review! :)   xo, Alli    www.alliworthington.com/toninieuwhof/

We begin our Tough Topics series with a special guest, Major Tom Grace. In this episode, Kaitlyn and Major Tom talk about what forgiveness means and how the journey of forgiving others and ourselves can lead to true healing. Check it Out: The book, "Forgiving What You Can't Forget" by Lysa TerKeurst. In it, Lysa dives into the personal experiences she has walked through and what the process of forgiveness was like for her.

"Forgiveness is possible, but it won't always feel possible. It's a double-edged word, isn't it? It's hard to give. It's amazing to get. But when we receive freely from the Lord and refuse to give it, something heavy starts to form in our souls." - Lysa TerKeurst, Forgiving What You Can't Forget This month on the Proverbs 31 Ministries Podcast, listen to Chapter One of Lysa TerKeurst's new book, Forgiving What You Can't Forget.  Related Resources: - Want to listen to Chapter Two of Forgiving What You Can't Forget? Sign up to be a Podcast Insider! Our free, monthly Insider email includes a bonus video from our hosts, journal prompts to dig deeper, a sneak peek at what's coming up, and more! - Take the next step by signing up for our free, online Bible study of Forgiving What You Can't Forget! The study starts January 19, 2021. Click here to sign up and order a copy of the book. - Do you have a dream to write? COMPEL Writers Training will help you get started on your writing goals this year with tools and resources to help you in your process, as well as opportunities to get your work published. Registration is open until January 20, 2021! Click here to join.   Click here to download the transcript for today's episode.

A note from Proverbs 31 Ministries: This podcast contains content that might not be suitable for young children, and may serve as a trigger due to circumstances in your past. Please see the related resources section at the bottom of this page if you need help finding a counselor.  When we've been deeply hurt, whether by someone or by circumstances outside of our control, we often wonder if forgiveness is even possible. What if they never say they're sorry? What if things will never feel “normal” again? Lysa TerKeurst has wrestled with these questions, and she's back with a four-episode installment of the popular series, Therapy & Theology, focusing on forgiveness, confession and codependency. Over the next four weeks, you'll hear from Lysa, as well as Proverbs 31 Ministries Director of Theological Research Joel Muddamalle, and Jim Cress, Lysa's personal, licensed professional counselor.  In this series, you will… Reconsider the misconceptions you've always believed about the forgiveness process by discovering seven truths about what forgiveness is and isn't that may surprise you. Let go of any bitterness holding you back from offering forgiveness to those who hurt you by understanding the necessity of daily confession. Find hope in the losses that are unchangeable or feel unforgivable by trusting in the character of God, even when you don't understand what has been allowed by God.  Recognize what codependency is and how it may be keeping you from setting the appropriate boundaries you need to ensure that you and your relationships are healthy. Related Resources: Discover what the Bible really says about forgiveness and the peace that comes from living it out with Lysa TerKeurst's latest book, Forgiving What You Can't Forget, available now! Ready to take the next step in finding a Christian counselor? Here's a good place to find the right fit for you and your circumstances: the American Association of Christian Counselors.   Click here to download the transcript for today's episode.

The holiday season is upon us! And while it brings us moments of reconnection, Christmas magic, and a whole lot of festive cheer, it can sometimes reveal deep pockets of pain that we haven't fully addressed yet.   If you know all too well what I'm talking about, today's episode is for you. I'm honored to share my conversation with author and speaker Lysa TerKeurst, but you may know her as the President of Proverbs 31 Ministries. She shares about her journey with forgiveness, specifically while dealing with a betrayal in her own home, and how she used it to find true healing.   In Lysa's new book, Forgiving What You Can't Forget, she teaches us new ways to work through pain and move on with joy in our hearts. She brings a new level of honesty and vulnerability that helped me find a new perspective on this essential skill we all practice in our day-to-day lives.    Things we covered in this shorter-than-usual episode:  1. The shocking blessing of bitterness 2. The best time for forgiveness (the answer will surprise you!) 3. The false narrative we tell ourselves when we experience a trigger   After our conversation, stick around for our coaching time where I share listener-submitted questions about life, faith, and business!   And while you're here, have you downloaded my FREE Christmas Gift Guide yet? My team and I spent weeks putting together this extensive guide to all things gifts, and I just know you'll find the perfect item for everyone on your list. Grab your copy at alliworthington.com/christmas   One more thing, this is the last week to join Called Creatives at the introductory price of $19! After this week, the price jumps up to $29 (but if you join now, you'll lock in the intro rate forever and ever amen).    Favorite quotes: 1. I always thought forgiveness was an unfair gift we have to give to the person who hurt us, and what I discovered is forgiveness is more about God giving the gift of healing to our hearts. 2. Forgiveness is both a decision and a process. 3. The blessing of bitterness is it actually shows us what a tender beautiful heart we have because bitterness doesn't often visit people with cold hearted hearts. Bitterness often comes to people who have loved deep so they got hurt really deep. 4. Forgiveness is supposed to be that step toward healing that we take early on, so that our heart can embrace, not just the reality of the situation, but the potential beauty of the life lessons we can learn along the way.   5. Boundaries aren't meant to shove another person away, but they are meant to help hold me together, so I can fully forgive someone.   In this episode I answer these questions: 1. What do I need to do to take care of my skin as I near my 40s? (30:17)   2. What should I do if I don't agree with all my church's teachings? (36:30) 3. How do I know what to invest in my business? (40:36)   Great things we discussed:  1. Lysa Turkerust 2. Forgiving What You Can't Forget 3. The Forgiveness Journal 4. Epionce 5. Bye Bye Foundation  6. Bare Minerals 7. The Crown 8. Take Courage  9. The 2020 Christmas Gift Guide    Hope you loved this episode! Be sure to subscribe in iTunes and slap some stars on a review! :) xo, Alli  www.alliworthington.com/lysaterkeurst2

Being vulnerable and talking to the individual and not the crowd is a powerful way to write books that relate to your readers. This key insight comes from today's conversation with New York Times best-selling author and immensely popular Christian voice Lysa TerKeurst. After chatting about how Lysa first met hosts Rory and AJ Vaden, she opens up about her journey of discovering her husband's infidelity and ultimately forgiving him. This remarkable story forms the basis of her latest book, Forgiving What You Can't Forget. Following this, we discuss the value of being vulnerable and how it can help you get your message across to readers. While exploring the differences between privacy and secrecy, Lysa talks about not letting crisis define you. She then shares her top tips on building a message that can inspire hope without alienating readers. Reflecting on Lysa's writing process, we touch on the huge place that forgiveness and confession have in scripture and how Lysa aims to live her life in a state of “pre-forgiveness.” Lysa wraps up our discussion by giving listeners some final advice on how you should position your book for readers before highlighting the need to provide solutions to your reader's problems. Tune in for more wisdom from Lysa TerKeurst, an author whose sound strategies have led to her selling more than six million copies of her books.  

A note from Proverbs 31 Ministries: This podcast contains content that might not be suitable for young children, and may serve as a trigger due to circumstances in your past. Please see the related resources section at the bottom of this page if you need help finding a counselor.  When we've been deeply hurt, whether by someone or by circumstances outside of our control, we often wonder if forgiveness is even possible. What if they never say they're sorry? What if things will never feel “normal” again? Lysa TerKeurst has wrestled with these questions, and she's back with a four-episode installment of the popular series, Therapy & Theology, focusing on forgiveness, confession and codependency. Over the next four weeks, you'll hear from Lysa, as well as Proverbs 31 Ministries Director of Theological Research Joel Muddamalle, and Jim Cress, Lysa's personal, licensed professional counselor.  In this series, you will… Reconsider the misconceptions you've always believed about the forgiveness process by discovering seven truths about what forgiveness is and isn't that may surprise you.  Let go of any bitterness holding you back from offering forgiveness to those who hurt you by understanding the necessity of daily confession. Find hope in the losses that are unchangeable or feel unforgivable by trusting in the character of God, even when you don't understand what has been allowed by God.  Recognize what codependency is and how it may be keeping you from setting the appropriate boundaries you need to ensure that you and your relationships are healthy. Related Resources: Discover what the Bible really says about forgiveness and the peace that comes from living it out with Lysa TerKeurst's latest book, Forgiving What You Can't Forget, available now! Ready to take the next step in finding a Christian counselor? Here's a good place to find the right fit for you and your circumstances: the American Association of Christian Counselors.  Click here to download the transcript for today's episode.

Popular author Lysa TerKeurst returns to the show this week to catch us up on the reconciliation of her marriage and how to forgive things that can't be forgotten. We discussed dealing honestly with grief and acknowledging pain instead of spiritual bypassing. We talked at length about forgiveness, why it's important for our healing, and how to give forgiveness to someone who really doesn't deserve it… and why maybe the matter of their deserving-ness is the wrong question. I highly recommend you check this out along with her new book, Forgiving What You Can't Forget. I was moved, y'all.Order Forgiving What You Can't Forget: Discover How to Move On, Make Peace with Painful Memories, and Create a Life That's Beautiful AgainFollow Lysa on Instagram.Support me and my work at patreon.com/jonathanpuddleOrder my new devotional, You Are Enough: Learning to Love Yourself the Way God Loves You.Find every book or resource I've talked about on my Amazon storefront, in Canada, the United States or the United Kingdom.

A note from Proverbs 31 Ministries: This podcast contains content that might not be suitable for young children, and may serve as a trigger due to circumstances in your past. Please see the related resources section at the bottom of this page if you need help finding a counselor.  When we've been deeply hurt, whether by someone or by circumstances outside of our control, we often wonder if forgiveness is even possible. What if they never say they're sorry? What if things will never feel “normal” again? Lysa TerKeurst has wrestled with these questions, and she's back with a four-episode installment of the popular series, Therapy & Theology, focusing on forgiveness, confession and codependency. Over the next four weeks, you'll hear from Lysa, as well as Proverbs 31 Ministries Director of Theological Research Joel Muddamalle, and Jim Cress, Lysa's personal, licensed professional counselor.  In this series, you will… Reconsider the misconceptions you've always believed about the forgiveness process by discovering seven truths about what forgiveness is and isn't that may surprise you. Let go of any bitterness holding you back from offering forgiveness to those who hurt you by understanding the necessity of daily confession. Find hope in the losses that are unchangeable or feel unforgivable by trusting in the character of God, even when you don't understand what has been allowed by God. Recognize what codependency is and how it may be keeping you from setting the appropriate boundaries you need to ensure that you and your relationships are healthy. Related Resources: Discover what the Bible really says about forgiveness and the peace that comes from living it out with Lysa TerKeurst's latest book, Forgiving What You Can't Forget, available now! Ready to take the next step in finding a Christian counselor? Here's a good place to find the right fit for you and your circumstances: the American Association of Christian Counselors. Click here to download the transcript for today's episode.

Do you ever find yourself replaying and reliving the details of the deep hurt in your life?  Whether you've experienced pain through an event or a collection of hurt that built over time because someone wasn't who they were supposed to be, didn't do what they were supposed to do, or didn't protect you like they should have protected you, your heartbreak deserves a safe place to be processed. In this episode, Lysa TerKeurst unpacks three crucial perspective shifts that will empower you to start changing the way you see the most painful parts of your situation. Related Resources: If you enjoyed this episode, take it a step further with "5 Healing Perspectives for your Hurt or Heartbreak," a free resource from Lysa TerKeurst. This resource will help you stop feeling held captive by the hurt by using specific scriptures and reflective questions to help you move forward today. You can click here to get your free download! When pain feels deeply personal, do you find it hard to keep your reactions biblical? You aren't alone. Walk through a step-by-step process to free yourself from the hurt of your past and feel less offended today with the help of Lysa TerKeurst's newest book, Forgiving What You Can't Forget. Preorder your copy here, and start reading the first three chapters immediately! Click here to preorder. Click here to download the transcript for this episode.  

Welcome to another episode of We're Going There, the place where we can have honest conversations on real issues that are relevant today. I've been SO looking forward to introducing you to my BESTIE FOR THE RESTIE, the ever-fab, Lysa TerKeurst. Lysa has built her ministry by giving AWAY what God has given her. As the President of Proverbs 31 ministries, she hosts one of the best trainings for aspiring writers, teachers, and communicators called She Speaks. Today we are going to talk about the touchy topic of forgiveness. Now before you roll your eyes or think this isn't for you, take heed lest ye fall my brother and sister! She has a unique way of telling her story in a way that makes you feel safe enough to tell yours. And if you feel like you don't have the words, she gives you hers. My hope is that you love her as much as I do. This week I am giving away to 2 lucky winners an advance reader copy of Lysa's new book. All you have to do is share this message with your friends, family, and frienemies and tag @LysaTerkeurst and @BiancaOlthoff on social media to be entered to win. And if you want to bypass the whole process you can preorder her amazing new book Forgiving What You Can't Forget and you can also stalk her online @LysaTerkeurst. We're Going There is a new podcast and it would mean the world to me if you subscribed to the show and wrote a review. As a gift of appreciation, I'd love to send you a 7-week video bible study and PDF guide through the book of Ruth as my gift to you. All you need to do is write a review, take a photo of your review, and email it podcast@inthenameoflove.org to be sent your FREE goodies. You don't want to miss next week and if you're free tomorrow I'm dropping a bonus episode on Forgiving My Abuser. ?? B --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app

When life's seasons change or we are walking through a time of transition, it's easy for our relationship with God to feel dry — or maybe just plain hard. But what if our time with God actually has less to do with quieting everything around us, and instead has everything to do with making an appointment to quiet things within us? On this episode of the podcast, Shae Tate, special projects content manager for Lysa TerKeurst, walks through scriptures throughout the Bible that show us what pursuing God looks like in different seasons. We hope this episode gives you a new perspective to help you walk through that dry place and meet with the Lord in a fresh, new way. Related Resources: Let's face it: This year has felt a little out of control. It seems impossible to keep anxiety, worry and stress from taking up permanent residence. Now more than ever, we need reminders that God really is in control. Worry might have defined much of your 2020, but let worship define the rest of your year. Written by members of our COMPEL Training, 40 Reminders God is in Control: Devotions to Redirect Your Worry into Worship is FREE with a gift of your choice! Click here to learn more. When pain feels deeply personal, do you find it hard to keep your reactions biblical? You aren't alone. Walk through a step-by-step process to free yourself from the hurt of your past and feel less offended today with the help of Lysa TerKeurst's newest book, Forgiving What You Can't Forget. Preorder your copy here, and start reading the first three chapters immediately! Click here to preorder. When we hear or read a teaching or sermon that challenges us, it's natural to ask, "Now what?" What do we do with the information we're given? How should this affect us? How should it change or transform us? That's why we created “Now What? A Guide to Process & Apply Biblical Messages" to help you take action with the next practical step to be able to apply that message.  Click here to download the transcript for this episode.

Today's guest is someone who has been on the show before and in one of my most popular episodes, so when the opportunity came up to have her back on the show one more time, I jumped on it, especially when I saw the title of her new book, Good Boundaries and Goodbyes: Loving Others Without Losing the Best of Who You Are!Lysa TerKeurst discusses where she gets her ideas for her books, primarily her struggles and what they show her she needs to improve and work on. She also elaborates upon what the word boundaries means to her and how she has learned what boundaries are from the Bible, the difference between being selfish and demonstrating self-control, how boundaries help prevent unpleasant extremes and what to do if those extremes take place anyway, and so much more.I am so appreciative of Lysa for her friendship, for being on the show, and for having written this new book. If you are someone who struggles with setting boundaries with people and/or feel like you're being selfish if and when you do, then I strongly recommend that you pick up a copy! In This Episode[00:35] - I am so honored to have a repeat guest today, Lysa TerKeurst![01:19] - Lysa reminds us of who she is.[03:45] - What do boundaries mean to Lysa?[06:28] - Lysa shares how to implement responsibility.[07:56] - How does Lysa determine someone's responsibility level?[10:48] - Lysa reveals what can happen as a result of no boundaries.[13:41] - How do we set boundaries while still wanting to serve and help others?[14:34] - Lysa points out the difference between selfishness and self-control.[18:00] - How do we set boundaries without walking away from people we love?[20:15] - How do we set boundaries with people who are living with us?[22:52] - What if you set a boundary with someone and they respond negatively?[25:27] - Lysa argues that trying to control someone leads to us feeling trapped.[27:09] - I make a case for what the main idea of Lysa's book is.[30:43] - Lysa's insight applies to all of the relationships in our lives.[33:12] - Good health spreads.Links & ResourcesCrystal PaineThe Crystal Paine Show: 103. Forgiving What You Can't Forget (with Lysa TerKeurst)BooksGood Boundaries and Goodbyes: Loving Others Without Losing the Best of Who You Are by Lysa TerKeurstSocial MediaCrystal Paine on InstagramCrystal Paine on TwitterCrystal Paine on GoodreadsMoney Saving MomMoney Saving Mom on FacebookMoney Saving Mom Deal Seekers Facebook groupcrystal@moneysavingmom.comAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands