3 on the Tree

A couple weeks ago, we got together in downtown Fenton and had a blast hanging out for a couple hours! This is a long one, but it was good to have the guys all together, for a change.   Intro/Outro - "Kirby" by Aesop Rock

We're back, ya puds! This week, we're joined by special guest Jesse to talk about knives, vacuums, berry juice, and all the other pyramid schemes we've failed at. The audio is a bit fuzzy because we had to record in an open room, but we'll be back to normal next time.    Intro/Outro - Kirby by Aesop Rock

This week, our good pal and accomplished metal worker, Peter from Phyre Forge joins us to discuss our April trip to the Handbuilt Show in Austin, TX, where we'll be throwing Ian a pretty rad bachelor party weekend!   Intro/Outro - "Hopelessly Hopeless" by Evergreen Terrace 

This week, we're joined by special guest Sara, who is studying medicine. She shares stories about aaaaaall the disgusting things that happen in surgery, and gives us a running tally on the number of gonads she's seen (spoiler alert: it's a lot)!    Intro/Outro - "Hopelessly Hopeless" by Evergreen Terrace

Happy New Year, friends!    Intro/Outro - "Hopelessly Hopeless" by Evergreen Terrace

Happy holidays from the 3OT gang, and we hope you have an awesome New Year! Intro/Outro - "Hopelessly Hopeless" by Evergreen Terrace

This episode is a step-by-step guide on how to make sexual advances towards a handsome amputee, among other things, that is...       Intro/Outro - "Hopelessly Hopeless" by Evergreen Terrace

We're back from the long awaited Vegas reunion, and man, it was a freakin blast! This week, we talk about the highs and lows of SEMA, Casey's strange encounters at Kansas City Comic Con, and we discuss the flood of sexual harassmant accusations pouring out of the entertainment industry.    Intro/Outro - "Hopelessly Hopeless" by Evergreen Terrace

This week is full of stories about scary dogs, road rage, and dead hippos!    Intro/Outro - "Hopelessly Hopeless" by Evergreen Terrace

October is upon us, and that means we're only weeks away from the SEMA show in Vegas! We'll be documenting our adventures over facebook and instagram, so stay tuned. Scattered among the unrelated talking points, we also cover motorcycle wrecks, international prisons we'd rather not visit, American healthcare, and, of course, the national anthem debacle. Have a killer weekend, everybody!   Intro/Outro - "Hopelessly Hopeless" by Evergreen Terrace

Long time no see, friends, but we're back! This week, we recap our summers, and manage to pack 3 months-worth of scornful mockery into a heated 78 minutes. So join us as we trade stories and hurl insults on this week's episode of the Three on the Tree Podcast!   Intro/Outro - "Hopelessly Hopeless" by Evergreen Terrace

This week we're joined by long-time 3OT guest, Mikel, and we rant about music, politics, and all the whiney kids on the internet.    Intro/Outro - "Hopelessly Hopeless" by Evergreen Terrace

This week in celebrity deaths: a rockstar, a racer, and a profesional big game hunter. On a positive note - apparently you can cook meth on a hotplate! All this and more on this week's episode of 3OT!   Into/Outro - "Hopelessly Hopeless" by Evergreen Terrace

It's been a while since our last episode, but since then, we've been studying up on snake people, alternative uses for chinchillas, and sadistic killer whales! Plus, we are joined by our friend Joe from the Flint-based metal band Absorbed (https://www.facebook.com/absorbedmetal/). Enjoy, and have a great week!   Intro/Outro - "Hopelessly Hopeless" by Evergreen Terrace    

Ever wondered how easy it is to get a medical marijuana card? Well you're in luck, pal! Throughout the course of this episode, we apply, get approved, and receive our prescription. The best part is, it works in multiple states! Check it out and have a great weekend!   Intro/Outro - "Hopelessly Hopeless" by Evergreen Terrace

This week, we're joined by Joe, from the Flint-based metal band Absorbed, to discuss their new album "No Lives Matter!" Find it on iTunes, Amazon, and Spotify, and follow their page at www.facebook.com/absorbedmetal   Intro/Outro - "Hopelessly Hopeless" by Evergreen Terrace

This week, we learned that the CIA is kind of like Santa Claus:   They see you when you're typing, They're listening through your TV, They'll learn about that incriminating article you're writing, And they'll crash your car into a tree!   Keep your digital nose tidy, and have a great week!   Intro/Outro - "Hopelessly Hopeless" by Evergreen Terrace

Despite what you may remember, Shaq was a genie in a boombox, and Sinbad was just an annoying Big Mac-slurping freeloader. Also, bedbugs: they're grosser than you thought. After they bite you, they spackle over the hole with feces, which can kill an old lady! I don't know, just listen...    Intro/Outro - "Hopelessly Hopeless" by Evergreen Terrace

If you're reading this, you are catching us in the middle of an all-out war. The 3OT hosts are battling to find out who can post the most disgusting video! Defiling a manequin, deficating out the window of a speeding car, surgical removal of the worlds largest booger... We will sink to any depth possible to snatch victory from our fellow degenerates! If you find a video that you believe is a contender, post it on our facebook page!   Intro/Outro - "Hopelessly Hopeless" by Evergreen Terrace

Everybody has heard jokes about "toe-tapping" (the act of propositioning someone for sex in a public restroom), but nobody actually does that, right?! Wrong. VERY wrong. Our old buddy Mikel joins us to discuss how Casey was literally scared limp by a peeping tom squeezing his peter in the john! In addition, we hear about the metally-challenged sex offender that's stalking Mikel. More horrible stories than you can shake your dingus at on this week's episode of the Three on the Tree Podcast!   Intro/Outro - "Hopelessly Hopeless" by Evergreen Terrace

If I were making a list of things that I didn't want to smell, porn would be near the top, sandwiched somewhere between Snooki and a herd of walruses. However, the adult film industry is, once again, pushing the limits of what the public can literally stomach with "OhRoma!" Join us, and special guests Candy (Sweets4aSweet Cosplay) and April Gloria as we delve into this, and a myriad of other questionable inventions, on this week's episode of the Three on the Tree Podcast! Find April at www.facebook.com/aprilgloriacosplay and Candy at www.facebook.com/Sweets4aSweetCosplay   Intro/Outro - "Hopelessly Hopeless" by Evergreen Terrace

This week, Sweet Joe joins us for a Facebook Live discussion of which celebrities we think will kick the bucket in 2017, which ones we hope will go, and which ones might just bring a tear to our eyes. Also on the docket are spider monkey handjobs, competitive shotgun twirling, and the office staff at Brazzers!    Intro/Outro - "Hopelessly Hopeless" by Evergreen Terrace

Merry Christmas and happy New Year, dinguses! On this episode, we explain why Davis doesn't own a drone, why Casey owns 4 plungers, and why there's a kid in stumbling around Detroit with a black eye and no glasses. Subscribe to 3OT on iTunes, and have a great week!   Intro/Outro - "Hopelessly Hopeless" by Evergreen Terrace

If you hoard your dirty diapers, maybe you should hoard your car's exhaust, too...

Fecal Impaction - the formation of a large mass of hard stool in the rectum. While this stool may be too large to pass, loose, watery stool may be able to get by, leading to diarrhea or leakage of fecal material That's all you need to know about this episode, friends! Into/Outro - "Hopelessly Hopeless" by Evergreen Terrace

With the election drawing close, and the last presidential debate on the horizon, everybody is getting political. Even Amy Schumer stumbled into the crossfire, this week, prompting fans to heckle and walk out of the theater. So, with all this bitter partisanship, we've got to rally around ideas that bridge the political gap, and Casey does just that with his proposal for "Mexican border bang towns!" Prepare to have your mind blown! Intro/outro - "Hopelessly Hopeless" by Evergreen Terrace

Episode 50 marks a big milestone, for us, and joining in the festivities is Joe McCarthy from the Brothers McCarthy Podcast! Up for discussion, this evening, are weird-looking male celebrities that women freakin' swoon over, teenage Ian flogging his dolphin at a Promise Keepers rally, Joe's adventures in Spain, and Casey's list of stunted, oddball cosplay possibilities. Enjoy the show, add Scottie Pippen on LinkedIn, and check the Brothers McCarthy Podcast at www.brothersmccarthy.com Correction: It was James Brolin(not Josh) who wished everyone a happy 9/11.  Intro/Outro - "Hopelessly Hopeless" by Evergreen Terrace

In this week's episode, we give a half-hearted wave goodbye to Casey, who is currently lounging directly in the path of Hurricane Matthew! As buoyant as he is, we don't expect him to survive the short term food shortages, power outages, and potential physical exertion that he will endure while coping with some minor first world inconveniences. So we spend his last evening alive discussing the new Ford Bronco, Kim Kardashian's Paris robbery, and a nasty old lady who's very much looking forward to a Trump presidency. Like, subscribe, and enjoy this week's episode of the Three on the Tree Podcast! Intro/Outro - "Hopelessly Hopeless" by Evergreen Terrace

If you're like us, the first Presidential Debate of 2016 probably left you reeling, disgusted, nauseous, and, well, whatever the opposite of horny is. Shrinkage! This debate gave me shrinkage! However, if you hold your nose and sort through the mire and muck, ol' Drump and Shillary managed to give us a little bit of insight into what their policies might actually look like. So this week, Casey, Davis, and a wise young sage from the Black Hills named Mike Gallucci strap on their hazmat suits and dive head-first into this stinking cesspool of a debate in an attempt to unclog these two idealogical toilets that we call candidates. Like, subscribe, comment, and share this week's episode of the Three On the Tree Podcast!  Intro/Outro - "Hopelessly Hopeless" by Evergreen Terrace

This week we're joined by one of Casey's old friends, Jesse, whose is the guitarist for the band "Servant." Lots of people have been in a band at some point, but few get to hit the road and play shows across the country. Jesse shares some great stories about his best and worst experiences while touring, and gives some insight into what it's like be on the road. Like, comment, and subscribe, and have a great week! You can find Servants at www.facebook.com/ServantsNE and http://servantsne.bandcamp.com/ Intro/Outro - "Hopelessly Hopeless" by Evergreen Terrace

Since Davis is off having his penis surgically tucked, Casey and Ian dove head first into one of their favorite topics - conspiracy theories. And what a great week to do it! As far as the internet is concerned, Hillary dropped dead at the 9/11 memorial, her body double has assumed her place manchurian candidate - style, and amoebas are eating people's brains. Take off your thinking caps, and soak up episode 46 of 3OT! Intro/Outro - "Hopelessly Hopeless" by Evergreen Terrace

The big news, this week, has to do with clowns trying to lure kids into the woods with candy. It's terrifying and dangerous! So, here are some helpful tips for protecting yourself from clowns: 1. Clowns hate licorice, so always be eating it! To put it in layman's terms, licorice is like antibonor to them. 2. Never play a kazoo. Clowns can hear kazoos for up to 3 miles, and it will draw them to your location. 3. If you plan to trap one, cotton candy is the perfect bait. Although, if it's raining, soak a large tootsie roll in Mellow Yellow, instead.  4. If you are cornered by a clown, soil yourself! It won't deter them, but it will make you slippery and hard to catch. Keep these tips and tricks in mind, and enjoy this week's episode of 3OT! Opening/Cloing - "Hopelessly Hopeless" by Evergreen Terrace

If there's anything we can learn from the rock 'n roll lifestyle of Carlos Danger, it's to be careful who you sext. Also, if you're married, maybe don't sext other women, like, at all? And you know, if you've gotten caught sexting several times, already, and there's a bunch of tabloid journalists willing to pay good money for a lead on another story about you, definitely, DEFINITELY don't sext. Oh, and if you do decide to sext, you should probably leave your kids out of the pics. I don't know, just a thought... Intro/Outro - "Hopelessly Hopeless" by Evergreen Terrace

With Olympic fever scaling down, we thought it would be fun to take a look at a few of the odd events that don't quite get the media coverage they deserve! Plus, we talk about one of the weirdest forms of ancient torture we've ever heard of, and Casey rants about Suicide Squad. Like, rate, and subscribe, and have a great week! Intro/Outro - "Hopelessly Hopeless" by Evergreen Terrace

Waterparks are awesome (1 out of 3 podcast hosts confirm this fact), but nobody's saying that they aren't without their downsides. I mean, if you manage to avoid E. coli, pavement burns, and the occasional bathing suit malfunction, there's still the off chance you might, oh I don't know, get blown off of a slide and decapitated... BUT I think we can all agree that when you compare the number of people maimed, infected, or killed with the amount of fun had by everyone else, it's kind of a wash!  Intro/Outro - "Hopelessly Hopeless" by Evergreen Terrace

Alright, let's say you're in a parking lot, and you see some old man picking on little girls. You tell him to stop, and then this derelict gets all up in your face! Do you: A. Swing on that fool B. Apologize and run C. Poop your pants and play opossum until he leaves We're weighing options on this episode of the Three on the Tree Podcast! Into/Outro - "Hopelessly Hopeless" by Evergreen Terrace

Davis and Casey host the podcast on their own, this week, because Ian's off playing wack-a-mole at Chuck E. Cheese's. Our thoughts are prayers go out to him as he tries to win enough tickets to purchase a pizza-shaped pool float! Good luck, ol' pal! Intro/Outro - "Hopelessly Hopeless" by Evergreen Terrace

It was bound to happen sooner or later, and here it is! This is a collection of Casey's best/worst stories about crapping his pants. A collection. Meaning there's more... way more. But these are the the worst ones!  Intro/Outro - "Hopelessly Hopeless" by Evergreen Terrace

Well, I hope you folks had a nice Fourth of July, because mine involved a Nissan Altima, a flooded road, and wet testicles. Sound sexy? You betcha.  Intro/Outro - "Hopelessly Hopeless" by Evergreen Terrace

Hey listeners! Has the Brexit got you feeling conflicted? Allow us to muddy the waters just a little bit more with some aimless speculation. Also, Swans are the worst type of waterfowl, and we give a shout out to presidential candidate Gary Johnson, who has earned the distinction of being the only person in the race who isn't Trump or Clinton!  Intro/Outro - "Hopelessly Hopeless" by Evergreen Terrace

These days, everyone is looking to spice things up in the bedroom, and there's a lot of different directions you can go... Our friend Candy, who is a cosplayer, podcaster, and former sex ed teacher, discusses a number of different products that would send your partner packing. These definitely ain't your Grandpa's dildos, kids, so prepare to get weird! Check out Candy's pages: facebook.com/Sweets4aSweetCosplay and @sweets4asweet Listen to her on velvetsledgehammer.podbean.com and project-nerd.com/category/podcast/modern-sex/ Intro/outro - "Hopelessly Hopeless" by Evergreen Terrace

I think everybody can name a handful of people that they're are pretty close to. Friends, family, spouses, etc. But who knows you REALLY well? I'm talking well enough to know, ahem... cough cough, EVERY part of you. That short stack of perverts represents your true friends list! All this and more, on episode 35 of 3OT!

Our old buddy Mike is with us this week, and we take turns divulging some of the most embarrassing moments of our lives! Ugh... so much shame! Like, subscribe, and rate us on iTunes, ya dingus! Intro/Outro - "Hopelessly Hopeless" by Evergreen Terrace 

Man is this a dumb week in the news! Substandard parents are letting their toddlers explore zoo enclosures, suicidal Chileans are offering themselves up as lion food, and Glenn Beck basically put a hit out on Donald Trump. The world might have you scratching your head, but not to worry! 3OT is determined to make some sense out of this garbage....  Intro/Outro - "Hopelessly Hopeless" by Evergreen Terrace

This week, we talk about some of the worst auto accidents we've ever witnessed, and get into some really frightening "would you rather" scenarios. Side note, this week's podcast is brought to you by Mr Cool Ice, and everyone with a "No Regerts" or "Only God Can Juge Me" tattoo! Also, check out The Brothers McCarthy Podcast: http://www.brothersmccarthy.com Intro/Outro - "Hopelessly Hopless" by Evergreen Terrace

This week, we're joined by cosplayer April Gloria and Twitch star/cosplayer LadyDevann! They give us their perspective on the Santa Fe Comic Con controversy, Hullk Hogan's man-scaping configuration, and the funniest and most disturbing things they've seen on Craigslist. Also, in response to last week's threats, Davis buys Casey a birthday present with his credit card info. I won't spoil the surprise, but let's just say it's rubber, and it has a head, but no face... Like and subscribe, and check out our guests' pages using the links below: LadyDevann - www.twitch.tv/ladydevann; www.facebook.com/ladydevann; and @LadyDevann  April Gloria - www.facebook.com/aprilgloriacosplay; and @aprilgloria  Intro/outro - "Hopelessly Hopeless" by Evergreen Terrace

This week, we ponder whether or not a blood-thirsty criminal, on death row, DRENCHED in bbq sauce, and armed with nothing but his pathological narcissism, could fend off a hungry lion in a Romanesque public execution. Plus, poop jokes... Check it out, ya dingus! Intro/outro - "Hopelessly Hopeless" by Evergreen Terrace

So there's this guy, and you'd rather he just wasn't around anymore. Luckily, you've had some poison stashed away for just such an occasion, but how do you get said poison into said guy? There's lots of options (darts, snakes, frogs, ivy, oak, etc.), but putting it in his food seems like the logical course of action. But which food? Hmm... 

Let's face it, this may be the worst election in history. However, we can all take comfort in the fact that somewhere, some trust fund baby is leaving a filthy millionaire sex romp only to find that his yacht's on fire. It's the little things, folks... Hey, check out our pals below! The Brothers McCarthy - www.brothersmccarthy.com CosSlay Podcast - www.facebook.com/CosSlayPodcast  Ultra Girls Cosplay - www.facebook.com/UltraGirlsCosplay Intro/outro music - "Hopelessly Hopeless" by Evergreen Terrace

This week, we learn that if the doctor plans on putting you under, you might want to wear your GoPro... Just a precaution. Also, for anybody who'd like to travel in squalor to Argentina over the course of the next 10 years, we found you a ride!

Brace yourselves, folks, because this is the first episode we've recorded while looking each other directly in our stupid faces. We're all together for this one, and we recount the multiple adventures of our brocation weekend!