Do you love someone with an addiction? Are you struggling? YOU ARE NOT ALONE. There is no mistaking it - drug abuse is a worldwide epidemic. If someone you know is caught in the grip of addiction, you are no doubt living in your own personal nightmare. Whether you are dealing with the turmoil that comes from loving someone with an addiction or feeling broken and knocked down from the aftermath, Saving You Is Killing Me is your go-to book and podcast that can help you take back your power and your life. When you love someone who drinks too much or suffers from an addiction, it hurts. Life is not ‘normal.’ You may feel alone, but you are not unique in your pain or dilemma. Nor are you isolated in this situation. Saving You Is Killing Me is a helpful guide to light a darkened path. Regardless of the situation, you are in, loving someone with an addiction is emotionally, psychologically, and physically draining. You must understand that nobody deserves to suffer - you have the right to live a peaceful and fulfilled life that is full of love! You can, and you will find happiness again! Your journey starts by taking back your power and shifting the focus back onto you! With compassion and grace, a positive psychology practitioner and the author of the book Saving You Is Killing Me: Loving Someone With An Addiction, Andrea Seydel, offers support by sharing from her personal experiences and the knowledge that she used to help navigate the wreckage of her own struggle. She exposes the tremendous power of how our relationships can both hurt us and allow us to heal. Trauma is a fact of life, and navigating the turmoil from loving someone with an addiction can be extremely challenging. Saving You Is Killing Me offers new hope for reclaiming your life. Podcast host Andrea Seydel offers insight and learning opportunities for self-healing, recovery, and resilience that foster an empowering way of life. Join us weekly.
He's a Different Person Now: Grieving the Partner Who Disappeared Addiction can slowly change someone's personality, priorities, and emotional availability — leaving you grieving someone who is still physically present. In this episode, Andrea discusses ambiguous loss, attachment disruption, and how to process grief without suppressing it. You'll learn: What ambiguous loss is Why grief feels confusing when the person is still alive How to stop chasing temporary “good days” Simple grief rituals that help stabilize your heart This episode centers on Self-Care and Courage as you learn to grieve honestly and protect your emotional energy. Discover Andrea's book and healing resources at:
The Secret Is Eating Me Alive: Living With Addiction No One Else Knows About When no one else knows what's happening in your home, isolation can quietly become overwhelming. In this episode, Andrea explores the emotional and physiological cost of secrecy, including shame, chronic stress activation, and self-silencing. She explains the difference between privacy and secrecy — and how safe connection restores clarity. You'll learn: Why secrets activate your nervous system How shame grows in silence The importance of one safe “reality mirror” How to gently break isolation without oversharing This conversation weaves in Self-Compassion and Community as antidotes to silent suffering. For more guidance and support tools, visit:
I Feel Stuck and Trapped: When You Love Them But You're Not In Love Anymore Long-term relationships impacted by addiction can slowly erode emotional connection. You may still love them — but no longer feel in love. In this episode, Andrea discusses emotional numbness, learned helplessness, chronic stress, and the experience of feeling trapped in a relationship that once felt safe. You'll learn: Why emotional shutdown happens after prolonged stress The psychological toll of secrecy and isolation How to shift from “forever decisions” to “next right steps” Ways to rebuild Community and regain your sense of self This episode highlights Self-Compassion and Community as essential stabilizers when you feel stuck. Find additional support and Andrea's book at:
Gutsy Grief: Turning Loss Into Self-Discovery Grief doesn't always look like loss through death. For those who love someone struggling with addiction, grief can show up in quieter, more complicated ways — grieving the person who is still here but not fully present, grieving broken trust, lost time, and the life you thought you would have. In this deeply honest and meaningful conversation, Andrea is joined by John Jeff Hutter, author of Gutsy Grief: Turning Loss Into Self-Discovery. Together, they explore the reality that grief is not linear, not tidy, and not something to “get over.” Instead, grief can be something we learn to walk with — and even something that invites us into deeper self-discovery. John Jeff brings both lived experience and academic insight through his Master's in Happiness Studies, sharing a grounded and compassionate perspective on what it means to navigate loss and rebuild yourself in the aftermath. This episode is especially meaningful for anyone who: Loves someone with an addiction Feels the ongoing grief of “losing” someone who is still alive Is navigating emotional exhaustion, confusion, or heartbreak Is ready to move from survival toward healing and self-reconnection In This Episode, We Explore: Why grief doesn't follow stages, timelines, or predictable patterns The concept of grieving someone who is still alive Letting go of guilt around your grief The emotional toll of repeated losses in addiction How to hold both hope and heartbreak at the same time Reclaiming your identity after losing yourself in someone else's struggle What it means to have agency in the aftermath of loss Turning grief into a path of self-discovery and growth A Message for You If you're listening and feeling the weight of loving someone with an addiction, please know this: Your grief is real. Your experience matters. And you are allowed to take care of yourself, too. Get the Book You can find Gutsy Grief: Turning Loss Into Self-Discovery by John Jeff Hutter wherever books are sold. This is more than a book — it's a companion for anyone learning how to live with loss and still move forward with intention and strength. Stay Connected with Andrea Explore more support, resources, and conversations at: https://linktr.ee/Andreaseydel www.savingyouiskillingme.com
When Addiction Crosses Boundaries: Betrayal, Shock & Protection Sometimes addiction escalates into secret sexual behavior, pornography use, online chat groups, or other boundary-crossing actions that leave you in shock. This episode addresses betrayal trauma, emotional shock, and the physiological impact of discovering hidden sexual behavior. Andrea discusses why your body reacts so strongly, how to prioritize safety, and how to protect yourself and your children when trust is broken. You'll learn: What betrayal trauma is and why it feels overwhelming Why your nervous system may feel physically shaken How to shift from relationship panic to safety stabilization Practical first steps to protect your emotional and physical well-being This conversation centers on Courage and Self-Care — especially when your role shifts from partner to protector. For deeper tools and support, explore Andrea's book and resources at:
When They Say It's Not a Problem: Mood Swings, Denial & the Damage of Gaslighting When you see the mood swings, the secrecy, the behavioral shifts — but they insist nothing is wrong — it can leave you questioning your sanity. In this episode, Andrea explores the psychological impact of addiction-related denial, including gaslighting, hypervigilance, cognitive dissonance, and the toll it takes on your nervous system. If you've been feeling anxious, physically unwell, or unsure of your own perception, this conversation will help you reclaim clarity and emotional stability. You'll learn: Why denial destabilizes your nervous system How gaslighting slowly erodes self-trust The difference between arguing reality and responding to impact Practical ways to ground yourself and set emotional boundaries This episode is rooted in Self-Compassion and Courage — two of the core pillars of healing when loving someone with addiction. If this resonates, Andrea's book Saving You Is Killing Me: Loving Someone with an Addiction offers deeper support and structured guidance. Learn more and access resources at:
Love, Loss & Letting Go: When the Person You Knew Disappears Addiction can slowly transform someone you love into a version you no longer recognize. In this episode, Andrea discusses ambiguous loss, grief, trauma attachment, and the heartbreak of loving someone who feels emotionally gone. You'll learn: What ambiguous loss really means Why letting go feels so complicated How trauma bonds keep hope alive Practical steps to reclaim your emotional stability This episode weaves Self-Care and Courage into the process of release and self-respect. Explore Andrea's book Saving You Is Killing Me: Loving Someone with an Addiction and access additional support at:
Am I Overreacting? When Addiction in Parenthood Feels Like a Moral Dilemma When addiction enters the home, especially with children present, you may question your instincts. In this episode, Andrea addresses gaslighting, parental hypervigilance, and the internal conflict between protection and partnership. You'll learn: Why your protective instinct is biologically wired How minimization distorts perception The psychological toll of unpredictability in parenting How to define non-negotiables without escalating conflict This episode highlights Self-Compassion and Community as stabilizing forces. Learn more about protecting your peace while parenting through addiction at:
Breaking the Guilt Loop: Saying No Without Shame When your addicted loved one asks for money, favors, or help and you say no guilt can feel overwhelming. In this episode, Andrea explores trauma bonds, guilt conditioning, and why saying no can feel like betrayal even when it's healthy. You'll learn: Why guilt doesn't always mean you're wrong How trauma bonding reinforces over-responsibility The difference between compassion and rescue How to set boundaries without spiraling into shame This episode emphasizes Self-Compassion and Courage as you break old patterns and reclaim your autonomy. Find deeper support and Andrea's book at:
Turn Pain into Purpose: A Special Invitation to Join Our Collective Book This is a special episode — a personal invitation. If you've ever loved someone with an addiction, you already understand the complexity, the heartbreak, and the strength it takes to keep going. This episode is an invitation to be part of something deeply meaningful. We are creating a powerful collective book: When Love Is Not Enough: The Hard Truth About Loving Someone with an Addiction This will be a professionally published collection of real, honest stories from people who have loved someone with an addiction and are ready to share their experience — not perfectly, but truthfully. This book is about: • The reality of loving someone through addiction • The emotional toll and internal struggle • The moments that shift everything • The journey of reclaiming yourself • And the message you would share with someone still in it
When Letting Go Feels Impossible: Support Through Abandonment Pain When a parent leaves, physically or emotionally, children feel it deeply. And so do you. In this episode, Andrea discusses attachment insecurity, separation anxiety, and how children process abandonment when addiction disrupts family stability. You'll learn: Why children's nervous systems respond strongly to unpredictability How to create emotional safety through consistency The power of co-regulation Simple ways to rebuild stability at home This episode weaves Self-Care and Community into parenting through instability. For additional support and resources, visit:
Comfort vs. Chaos: When You're Exhausted by the Lies and Enabling At some point, exhaustion replaces argument. You may feel completely worn down by excuses, blame shifting, and denial. In this episode, Andrea explores emotional fatigue, enabling patterns, and what happens when you reach the end of your rope. You'll learn: Why chronic chaos creates nervous system burnout How enabling can develop unconsciously The difference between compassion and self-abandonment How to reclaim your power without escalating conflict This episode centers on Self-Compassion and Courage — especially when you're done carrying the emotional weight. Find tools, support, and Andrea's book at:
After the Truth Comes Out: How to Rebuild Trust When Honesty Finally Arrives When someone finally admits they have a problem, relief and resentment can collide. In this episode, Andrea discusses what happens psychologically when the truth surfaces after months or years of secrecy. Even when your partner seeks treatment, your nervous system may still feel guarded. You'll learn: Why trust doesn't automatically return after honesty The impact of chronic lying on attachment How trauma bonding complicates reconciliation Steps to rebuild safety slowly and intentionally This episode weaves Self-Care and Community into the rebuilding process. To learn more about protecting yourself while loving someone in recovery, visit:
Faith, Boundaries & Inner Peace: Loving with Strength, Not Suffering When loving someone with addiction, boundaries can feel like rejection — but they're often the beginning of peace. In this episode, Andrea explores how to love deeply without losing yourself. Whether your strength comes from spirituality, personal conviction, or inner clarity, boundaries protect what matters most — especially your children and your mental health. You'll learn: Why boundaries are an act of self-respect How guilt can mask healthy limits The difference between control and protection How to love without absorbing chaos This episode highlights Self-Compassion and Courage as essential tools for loving with strength rather than suffering. Find more guidance and structured support at:
When Detox Isn't Enough: Rebuilding Peace After Broken Promises Detox can feel hopeful. Treatment can feel promising. But what happens when you're still left rebuilding after years of broken promises? In this episode, Andrea explores the emotional aftermath of relapse cycles, shattered trust, and the psychological impact of repeated hope followed by disappointment. Even when your loved one enters detox, you may still feel exhausted, guarded, or unsure how to move forward. You'll learn: Why broken promises create attachment trauma How relapse cycles affect your nervous system The difference between hope and self-protection Practical ways to rebuild your internal peace This episode centers on Courage and Self-Care — especially when you realize detox alone doesn't heal the damage left behind. For deeper support, explore Andrea's book Saving You Is Killing Me: Loving Someone with an Addiction and additional resources at:
It's Your Turn to Be the Light: The Story You've Survived Could Save Someone Else Supporting you through addiction's shadows Feel empowered, regain happiness, and know you're not alone in our supportive community.
I Want to Help… But I'm Done Being the Hero The Helper-Hero Burnout Cycle & How to Step Out of It Supporting you through addiction's shadows Feel empowered, regain happiness, and know you're not alone in our supportive community.
Is It Allergies… or Addiction?— When You Start to Notice the Signs Before They Say a Word Supporting you through addiction's shadows Feel empowered, regain happiness, and know you're not alone in our supportive community.
I Don't Know What's Real Anymore How to Rebuild Self-Trust After Emotional Chaos
When Life Breaks You: Overcoming Life's Toughest Setbacks with Andy Campbell Supporting you through addiction's shadows Feel empowered, regain happiness, and know you're not alone in our supportive community.
Letting Go of Your Best Friend — When Grief Feels Unbearable
Loving Them Is Hurting Me How to Set Boundaries Without Losing Your Heart
How Do I Let Go When I Still Love Them? The Grief of Releasing Someone You Never Stopped Caring About
Supporting you through addiction's shadows Feel empowered, regain happiness, and know you're not alone in our supportive community.
Supporting you through addiction's shadows Feel empowered, regain happiness, and know you're not alone in our supportive community.
Supporting you through addiction's shadows Feel empowered, regain happiness, and know you're not alone in our supportive community.
Supporting you through addiction's shadows Feel empowered, regain happiness, and know you're not alone in our supportive community.
Supporting you through addiction's shadows Feel empowered, regain happiness, and know you're not alone in our supportive community.
Supporting you through addiction's shadows Feel empowered, regain happiness, and know you're not alone in our supportive community.
Supporting you through addiction's shadows Feel empowered, regain happiness, and know you're not alone in our supportive community.
Supporting you through addiction's shadows Feel empowered, regain happiness, and know you're not alone in our supportive community.
209: Healing Through Setbacks- A Self-Compassionate Approach to Addiction's Impact Supporting you through addiction's shadows with books, podcasts, courses, retreats and more. Feel empowered, regain happiness, and know you're not alone in our supportive community.
208: Feel Good Again- Embracing Positivity When Addiction Drains You Supporting you through addiction's shadows with books, podcasts, courses, retreats and more. Feel empowered, regain happiness, and know you're not alone in our supportive community.
207: See Yourself Clearly- Reclaiming Your Worth When Their Addiction Shakes You Supporting you through addiction's shadows with books, podcasts, courses, retreats and more. Feel empowered, regain happiness, and know you're not alone in our supportive community.
206: From Powerless to Powerful- Reclaiming Your Strength and Control Supporting you through addiction's shadows with books, podcasts, courses, retreats and more. Feel empowered, regain happiness, and know you're not alone in our supportive community.
205: Permission to Be Human in Tough Times- Let Go of Perfection and Embrace Compassion Supporting you through addiction's shadows with books, podcasts, courses, retreats and more. Feel empowered, regain happiness, and know you're not alone in our supportive community.
204: Know Yourself Again: The Power of Self-Awareness in Healing from Addiction's Impact Supporting you through addiction's shadows with books, podcasts, courses, retreats and more. Feel empowered, regain happiness, and know you're not alone in our supportive community.
203: Struggling Well- How to Grow When Addiction Tests You Supporting you through addiction's shadows with books, podcasts, courses, retreats and more. Feel empowered, regain happiness, and know you're not alone in our supportive community.
202: Control vs. Influence:-The Powerful Shift You Need to Take Back Your Life Supporting you through addiction's shadows with books, podcasts, courses, retreats and more. Feel empowered, regain happiness, and know you're not alone in our supportive community.
201- The 4 C's That Will Transform Your Journey- Compassion, Care, Courage, and Community Supporting you through addiction's shadows with books, podcasts, courses, retreats and more. Feel empowered, regain happiness, and know you're not alone in our supportive community.
200: The Fresh Start Effect-Embrace New Beginnings with Saving You Is Killing Me Supporting you through addiction's shadows with books, podcasts, courses, retreats and more. Feel empowered, regain happiness, and know you're not alone in our supportive community.
199- When You Feel Like You Can't Do This Anymore Supporting you through addiction's shadows with books, podcasts, courses, retreats and more. Feel empowered, regain happiness, and know you're not alone in our supportive community.
198- Are They Ready for Recovery? Why Wait Until Rock Bottom Supporting you through addiction's shadows with books, podcasts, courses, retreats and more. Feel empowered, regain happiness, and know you're not alone in our supportive community.
197- Exciting News: Introducing My New Book and Podcast, Recovery Without Rock Bottom Supporting you through addiction's shadows with books, podcasts, courses, retreats and more. Feel empowered, regain happiness, and know you're not alone in our supportive community.
196-The Courage to Reclaim Your Life: Embracing the Six Types of Courage Supporting you through addiction's shadows with books, podcasts, courses, retreats and more. Feel empowered, regain happiness, and know you're not alone in our supportive community.
195- From Broken to Beautiful: A Journey of Healing and Celebrating New Beginnings Supporting you through addiction's shadows with books, podcasts, courses, retreats and more. Feel empowered, regain happiness, and know you're not alone in our supportive community.
193- Level Two Gratitude: Finding Light in the Darkness Supporting you through addiction's shadows with books, podcasts, courses, retreats and more. Feel empowered, regain happiness, and know you're not alone in our supportive community.
193: Differentiation—Holding Onto Yourself in the Face of Addiction Supporting you through addiction's shadows with books, podcasts, courses, retreats and more. Feel empowered, regain happiness, and know you're not alone in our supportive community.
192- The Hidden Side of Dependence: Why They Might Be Hiding It From You Supporting you through addiction's shadows with books, podcasts, courses, retreats and more. Feel empowered, regain happiness, and know you're not alone in our supportive community.
191: Understanding Withdrawal- Why They Can't Just Stop Supporting you through addiction's shadows with books, podcasts, courses, retreats and more. Feel empowered, regain happiness, and know you're not alone in our supportive community.
190- Just When You Think You Can Breathe… Navigating the Unpredictable Nature of Addiction Supporting you through addiction's shadows with books, podcasts, courses, retreats and more. Feel empowered, regain happiness, and know you're not alone in our supportive community.
© 2020-2026 Ivy Podcast Discovery LLC
