Chart Music

Our mate Neil Kulkarni died in January. This episode is dedicated to him.Subscribe | Facebook | Twitter| The Chart Music Wiki | PatreonSimon's Quietus piece on Neil | Sofia's Gofundme pageSpecial thanks to Lily Wilde for cover art. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The latest episode of the podcast which asks; do we really have to hug? And rub-a-dub?The Chart Music time sofa descends upon March of 1993, Pop-Crazed Youngsters – the Forgotten Nineties, if you will. A time where the only options available to The Kids were having their heads filled with rubbish by trampy Americans, or being exploited by Ian Beales in Hypercolor t-shirts who can't play real music and want you to take loads of drugs. Your panel – ligging their way around London, ensconced in an Isleworth love nest and dealing with the misery of Gym Knickers, respectively – look back upon this strange perineum between Rave and Britpop, and have a tentative sniff at itAs for Our Favourite Thursday Evening Pop Treat, it's currently weathering it's 27th crisis under the stewardship of Stanley Appell, two years removed from its Year Zero clearout. The good news is he's been given carte blanche to put on whoever he likes. The bad news is, he's only a few months away from his 60th birthday, and there's soon to be a new BBC1 controller in town who – according to rumour – is thinking about letting Janet Street Porter have a go. Musicwise, it's a reminder that everything is still up for grabs in the post-Neightnies musicsphere: Right Said Fred get the wind of BBC Star Power at their backs, which can be a bit uncomfortable when you've cut the arse out of your trousers. Lenny Kravitz is SuperMuso. After Some Rap, Brett Anderson gets dragged to the front of assembly to explain why he's let the school down by singing too violently. Then it's over to Hawaii to drop in on the Lower-Case Canadian, before she gets a shave off Cindy Crawford. Runrig make their TOTP debut, then Rage Against The Machine, fresh from getting Bruno Brookes suspended for a week, kick off the run of blipverts that passes for the Breakers section these days, which also takes in Bryan Ferry, The Jesus Lizard and Dead Madonna. Diana Ross and a Sexy Saxman appear on the set of a school play of Escape From New York, and we end with some sexy Belgian pinball action, all hosted by Mark Franklin, who was probably younger than you at the time, and still is. Sarah Bee and Simon Price join Al Needham for a rummage under the sewn-on cushion on the Mastermind chair of 1993, veering off on such tangents as being mithered by members of Suede and Elastica at a student disco, why all snack wafers of the Eighties sound like Bryan Ferry LP titles, the Lesbian Elephant, Jonny Sex-Cat and the Accessible Gamesdog, Paintballing with Ride, and Al's Secret Terror. SWEAR SWEAR, SWEAR-SWEAR SWEAR SWEAR, SWEAR-SWEAR SWEAR SWEAR, SWEAR-SWEAR THERE'S SOME SWEARING.Video Playlist| Subscribe | Facebook | Twitter| The Chart Music Wiki | PatreonGet your tickets for Chart Music at Birmingham Town Hall on Jan 13th HERE Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Simon Price, Sarah Bee and Al Needham hit the final stretch of this episode of TOTP with the chance to hear 20 seconds of a Xmas Number One, Bryan Ferry going through the motions, some Americans who want to weld you into a chair and Dead Madonna, then Diana Ross gets all excited at the sight of an oiled-up saxman, and we continue our ongoing mission to praise the Belgians. REACH FOR THE SKIES, POP-CRAZED YOUNGSTERS!Video Playlist | Subscribe | Facebook | Twitter | The Chart Music Wiki | PatreonGet your tickets for Chart Music at Birmingham Town Hall on Jan 13th HERE Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Sarah Bee, Simon Price and Al Needham end up having a massively deep dive on Suede, before being whipped over to Hawaii to watch the Lower-Case Canadian sit on a box for a bit. Oh, and Runrig!Video Playlist | Subscribe | Facebook | Twitter | The Chart Music Wiki | PatreonGet your tickets for Chart Music at Birmingham Town Hall on Jan 13th HERE Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Simon Price, Sarah Bee and Al Needham begin their slog through an early-Nineties episode of The Pops with an examination of the changes Stanley Appell wrought upon our fave Thursday Evening Pop Treat. Then we're immediately assailed by the sight of someone grabbing one of Right Said Fred's arse as they do a bit for Comic Relief, followed by SuperMuso and Some Rap. STICK IT OUT, POP-CRAZED YOUNGSTERS! Video Playlist | Subscribe | Facebook | Twitter | The Chart Music Wiki | PatreonGet your tickets for Chart Music at Birmingham Town Hall on Jan 13th HERE Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

#73 (Pt 1): 4.3.93 – Frank BaldSarah Bee, Simon Price and Al Needham gird their loins for a plunge into a TOTP from the early Nineties, but before all that there's a comprehensive leaf through that week's NME. a heartrending discussion about the misery of gym knickers and hair loss, and a massive plug for our live show in Birmingham…Video Playlist | Subscribe | Facebook | Twitter | The Chart Music Wiki | PatreonGet your tickets for Chart Music at Birmingham Town Hall on Jan 13th HERE Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The latest episode of the podcast which asks; so how do you set fire to a trophy?Like a man in a cage, we find ourselves trapped in the mid-Eighties, imprisoned in a lurid enclosure of neon and rolled sleeves and appalling Number Ones, with Gary Davies – fresh from a birthday party in a garage in Cumbria and looking well Bisto – in the Mr McKay role. Oh, it's a grim time to be young, Pop-Crazed Youngsters, when the only thing the youth can look forward to is a Giro, a chance to see the frontwoman of All Her Looks in concert and – if you're really lucky – landing a plum YTS gig, like Paul Jordan has. He's making his debut tonight, and we try to work out who he actually was.Musicwise, hmm. Colonel Abrams pops up to deliver a telegram which reads HOUSE IS COMING STOP. Bruce Dickinson paints Paul D'Anno out of history. A pre-codpiece Cameo make their ‘first-ever television debut' (thanks, Paul). Then the BBC runs an advert for a film made by someone from the Cradle Of Pop, followed by a double-whammy of Our Bands. The best duo in Pop history whose name begins with ‘Rene And' pitch up and pretend to be Prince. The Top Ten gets fisted by Billy Idol. Red Box asks us if we've heard the good news about Jesus. A Success Coat containing Midge Ure receives its sympathy #1, and The Kids (and City Farm) have a sensible jig to Five Star. Simon Price and Rock Expert David Stubbs join Al Needham for a good snuffle around the crotch of 1985, pausing along the way to shill their new books, followed by frank discussions about sexual awakenings under a massive poster of Pete Burns, the lamentable tale of Stubbs The Sap, the Great Top Valley Pupil Insurrection of 1985, Fetish Sporrans, being stared at by Morrissey at Chippenham Goldiggers, Quincy Punks, a comprehensive breakdown of the Chicken Dance, and a disgraceful run-in midway through the episode. SWEARING.Video Playlist| Subscribe | Facebook | Twitter| The Chart Music Wiki | PatreonGet your tickets for Chart Music at the London Podcast Festival HEREOrder Different Times by David HEREPre-order Curepedia by Simon HERE Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Simon Price, Rock Expert David Stubbs and Al Needham hit the final stretch of this episode of TOTP, and pick through the ‘delights' of the Top Ten. It's a meaty fist in the air for Billy Idol, King of the Quincy Punks, before being subjected to a cult indoctrination video. We savour Midge Ure's Sympathy Number One, and then it's on to the dancefloor for some well-supervised fun with Five Star, before your Mam finds out who's got Meeeshell in the club… Video Playlist | Subscribe | Facebook | Twitter | The Chart Music Wiki | PatreonGet your tickets for Chart Music at the London Podcast Festival HEREOrder Different Times by David HEREPre-order Curepedia by Simon HERE Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Simon Price, Rock Expert David Stubbs and Al Needham plunge ever-onwards into a post-Live Aid episode of The Pops, and it turns out that 1985 is SKILL – well, it is when Cameo are slinking about on TOTP stage. Then we're reminded of the dark times when John Parr pitches up to do a film advert. But then! It's a double-barrelled blast of Our Bands, as the Smiths are forced to do a video, and Lol Tolhurst stinks out a wardrobe. And them some bloke starts going about thinking he's Prince. GO FOR IT, POP-CRAZED YOUNGSTERS! Video Playlist | Subscribe | Facebook | Twitter | The Chart Music Wiki | PatreonGet your tickets for Chart Music at the London Podcast Festival HEREOrder Different Times by David HEREPre-order Curepedia by Simon HERE Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Simon Price, Rock Expert David Stubbs and Al Needham set about this episode of TOTP with the usual gleeful abandon, asking themselves; what did Paul Jordan actually do to get nobbed off from Radio 1 in less than a year? And why does Gary Davies look like he's been thrown into a tub of Bisto? Colonel Abrams gets us housetrained, Iron Maiden have a good widdle in California, and we're subjected to a break-in… Video Playlist | Subscribe | Facebook | Twitter | The Chart Music Wiki | PatreonGet your tickets for Chart Music at the London Podcast Festival HEREOrder Different Times by David HEREPre-order Curepedia by Simon HERE Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Simon Price, Rock Expert David Stubbs and Al Needham prepare for a punishing slog through a post-Live Aid episode of The Pops – but first, a good hard shill of their new books, which are out NOW/SOON. We leaf through that week's NME, discuss a Norwegian newspaper article from the year 2000, and, y'know, go on a bit about pop music. TUCK IN, POP-CRAZED YOUNGSTERS! Video Playlist | Subscribe | Facebook | Twitter | The Chart Music Wiki | PatreonGet your tickets for Chart Music at the London Podcast Festival HEREOrder Different Times by David HEREPre-order Curepedia by Simon HERE Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The latest episode of the podcast which asks; Whoops Scotties, Tasty Tarts Foster Grants or Allied For Carpets For You?Oh yes – it's back to the Eighventies we go, Pop-Crazed Youngsters, to a year where everyone was loaded into a cannon and fired into the dress-up box, or so we're led to believe. One look at Peter Powell – who has turned up looking like he's booked a week's holiday on a canalboat through Hoseasons – will remind you it wasn't quite like that.It's a boom time for TOTP, is early '81: they're pulling down Crossroads-level ratings week after week and they've got the Music TV field entirely to themselves, but – as this episode demonstrates – we're not in the Yellow Hurll era just yet, and there's a lot of dead wood to clear out. And, as the bill of fare tonight demonstrates, the Seventies are not done quite yet. Musicwise, it's a proper melange of young and old. Sharon Redd tries to be sexually overpowering in front of a grim tableau of gormless youths in visors doing the hand jive. The true icon of 1981 – The Man of Denim – spells out his five-year plan to tackle the social housing crisis in a special filmed broadcast. A punk lad gets dead excited at the sight of someone taking the stage in a PiL t-shirt, only to discover that it's Dave ‘No, the other one' Stewart.The show takes a severe turn towards the elderly when The Who – fresh from their new LP being absolutely coated down in the music papers – followed by Legs & Co ‘neath a giant Scotch egg, and an encore performance of that paint pot on Phil Collins' keyboard. But then! It's the fresh, virile sound of Bucks Fizz in their first ever TOTP performance, followed by an actual video that looks like Proper 1981, by Strange The Clock. Duran Duran pop up for a repeat of their TOTP debut, and then, Oh God, it's Toyah again, followed by Bryan Mirror and his new single, I Remember Johnny Lennon. Neil Kulkarni and Taylor Parkes join Al Needham in order to throw some bricks and petrol bombs at 1981, pausing along the way to discuss Masonic tombolas, Grange Hill tube station, the career of The Who in egg form, the damage that the American Syd Little wrought upon the charts, and – unfortunately – Breakfast television-related masturbatory shame. SWEARING! AND A BIG ANNOUNCEMENT!Video Playlist | Subscribe | Facebook | Twitter | The Chart Music Wiki | PatreonGet your tickets for Chart Music at the London Podcast Festival HERE Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Neil Kulkarni, Taylor Parkes and Al Needham finally stumble upon the real 1981 – Strange The Clock, and the New Street Station Dolls – while Al deals with an industrial dispute over Toyah by locking Neil and Taylor out and getting some robots in. And we finally get to grips with the most malign influence upon the charts of 1981 – the Syd Little of America…Video Playlist | Subscribe | Facebook | Twitter | The Chart Music Wiki | PatreonGet your tickets for Chart Music at the London Podcast Festival HERE Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Neil Kulkarni, Taylor Parkes and Al Needham plough on through this episode from the tail-end of the Eighventies, stopping for a deep, deep, deep dive on the post-Moon Who. Legs & Co say farewell to Pauline by sitting about under a giant Scotch egg, the Paint Pot comes back for an encore, and Bucks Fizz make their debut and do that thing with the Velcro…Video Playlist | Subscribe | Facebook | Twitter | The Chart Music Wiki | PatreonGet your tickets for Chart Music at the London Podcast Festival HERE Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Neil Kulkarni, Taylor Parkes and Al Needham commence their odyssey into the March 19th 1981 episode, and are horrified to discover that the Top Of The Pops Orchestra are still knocking about, and The Kids – who are supposed to be dressed up as nouveaux dandies – are wearing visors and doing the Blockbusters hand-jive. After a visit from Comrade Shaky – the Everlasting Gobstopper of Chart Music – it's a frigid blast of Dad-Synth. Oh dear… Video Playlist | Subscribe | Facebook | Twitter | The Chart Music Wiki | PatreonGet your tickets for Chart Music at the London Podcast Festival HERE Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Neil Kulkarni, Taylor Parkes and Al Needham prepare the stage for a late-Eighventies episode of The Pops – but first, it's a flick through that week's NME, Rod Hull and Emu pay tribute to Rolls-Royce, Neil speaks of his brush with the local Masonic Lodge (and fails to win the Tombola), Al shares not one but two embarrassing stories about teenage lust gone awry, and a BIG ANNOUNCEMENT…Video Playlist | Subscribe | Facebook | Twitter | The Chart Music Wiki | PatreonGet your tickets for Chart Music at the London Podcast Festival HERE Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The latest episode of the podcast which asks; has Rock Expert David Stubbs come from The Sky?After all the lovely Pop trifle we've had in recent episodes, Pop-Crazed Youngsters, it's time for some necessary roughage, as we take a tentative walk down Nineteen Eighty Six Street once more. And yes, it's stillone of the most rammel years for 20th Century Pop, but somehow we managed to find one which doesn't have the whiff of the dog's arse about it.It's only four months into '86, but our Favourite Thursday Evening Pop Treat is having another of its regular crises, this time brought on by the after effects of Michael Grade taking over at BBC1 and pissing about with the scheduling, meaning that ten whole minutes have been lopped off, and the results are not pretty; everything has been crammed in like a Japanese tube train at knocking-off time, videos have been cut off at the knees, there's a neon set better suited for a Miss Wet T-Shirt competition in Romeo & Juliet's Doncaster and the chart rundown – the whole point of the show, mark you – has been utterly defiled.Musicwise, it's better than it has any right to be. Gary Davies – a man bursting with so much sexual potency in 1986 that the sex workers of Amsterdam are pitching themselves through windows to get at him – has been given the chance to run the show solo for the first time in years, but we don't see that much of him, because there's no time. Big Country pitch up in Success Coats. Michael Hurll practically rips the wig off Falco's head and wipes his arse with it. A-Ha continue their spell as the premier teeny band and get creative with a bit of masking tape. Suzanne Vega gets judged by a poster of a German sex-colossus. And then, oh God, it's the longest examination of a single EVER on Chart Music. Janet Jackson stares her ponce of a boyfriend out. It's Immaterial look absolutely knackered and wonder why their label didn't make a video. George Michael drops the weirdest Number One of the decade, and Whitney Houston spoils everything with a huge dollop of mawk.Sarah Bee and Neil Kulkarni join Al Needham to gingerly pick through the wreckage of 1986, veering off on such tangents as Nick Ross' Drug Buffet, Neil's Gin and Vomit Shame, being mistaken for Pete Docherty's stalker, the best way to tell an interview subject that their new album stinks of unwashed cock, how the Ukraine War would have shagged up TOTP if it was still going, an appreciation of Euro-Ponces, how the BBC thought Bob Monkhouse, Barry Cryer and Nigel Havers could stop youths on dingy estates from taking heroin, and a huge Birmingham Piss Troll update. You know the swearing is going to be intense on this one…Video Playlist | Subscribe | Facebook | Twitter | The Chart Music Wiki | Patreon*** Listen to Sarah's new podcast HERE *** Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Neil Kulkarni, Sarah Bee and Al Needham finally claw their way up the final furlong on an episode of TOTP that's been better than any episode set in 1986 has a right to be. Neil issues a come-and-get-me statement to Janet Jackson, It's Immaterial look knackered and bemused on the big new set, George Michael delivers the weirdest Number One of the entire decade, and then the real '86 presents itself as Whitney Houston fills the Harlem Apollo with a concentrated blast of mawk. ALL YOU GOTTA DO IS BE YOURSELF, POP-CRAZED YOUNGSTERS… Video Playlist | Subscribe | Facebook | Twitter | The Chart Music Wiki | Patreon Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Sarah Bee, Neil Kulkarni and Al Needham plunge deeper into the 17.4.86 episode as we hit the Breakers section. Suzanne Vega slaps it about with assorted extras from Bonfire Of The Vanities, and then we get hit with REAL KIDS ISSUES as Grange Hill become child conscripts in the War On Drugs…Video Playlist | Subscribe | Facebook | Twitter | The Chart Music Wiki | Patreon Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Neil Kulkarni, Sarah Bee and Al Needham get stuck into the hellscape of 1986, and discover that it's not that rammel, actually. We gaze upon the even-toed ungulate splendour of Gary Davies – a man who divides his time between going out on the pull with Brian Tilsley, bringing peace upon the houses of Fine Young Cannibals and Matt Bianco, and making the sex workers of Amsterdam plunge through windows to get at him, only to discover that he's got a horrible jacket on. Big Country prepare to get properly massive, but und up buried under the weight of their record company's expectations and really expensive Success Coats. Falco gets reduced into a tiny box, like the baddies in Superman. And A-Ha get all creative with a keyboard and some masking tape… Video Playlist | Subscribe | Facebook | Twitter | The Chart Music Wiki | Patreon Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Sarah Bee and Neil Kulkarni join Al Needham and prepare for some serious loin-girding as they prepare to tackle an episode of The Pops from the unappealing middle bit of the Aydeez – a neon wasteland where the Dinosaurs of Pop are running rampant in their Success Coats with sleeves a-rolled. But first, a flick through that week's NME, and a vital BPT update… Video Playlist | Subscribe | Facebook | Twitter | The Chart Music Wiki | Patreon Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The latest episode of the podcast which asks; have any of Team Chart Music done a streak?It's late January, but the inflatable Jimmy Savile-as-Santa is still hanging off the roof of the Chart Music house and the wreath that looks like DLT still hangs on the door as we prepare to tuck into another end-of-year splurge of Pop, as our favourite Thursday evening pop treat gets shunted to a Friday teatime and another Selection Box of the hits of the year gets ripped into. ‘Tis the arse-end of 1974, Pop-Crazed Youngsters, and a definitely end-of-era feel hangs over this episode. Glam is in its last knockings, the teenybop icons are starting to fade, the brickies in Eyeliner are just brickies now, Mock n' Roll is in the ascendancy, the Pop Famine of 1975/6 is beckoning, and although there's much to love here, this could well be the very last episode of the Golden Age of Top Of The Pops. Noel Edmonds and Dave Lee Travis are on hand to take us through the smash hits of the year that weren't introduced by Tony Blackburn and Jinglenonce OBE on Xmas Day, and are fucking unbearable. Musicwise, like all end-of-year shows, it's your typical running-away-from-a-crocodile episode. The Rubettes pitch up for a victory lap with a flashing bow tie. John Denver goes on about his missus again, before he takes a chainsaw to their bed. Alvin displays the most amazing standwork ever on TOTP if you discount Brian Connolly breaking one over his knee, before George McCrae attempts to introduce the TOTP Orchestra to Disco as he stands over a leftover turkey carcass. Stephanie De Sykes represents the Kings Oak Massive, and then Sparks completely go off. The Glitter Band do a Nazi love gesture at Bad King Gary as he performs his great lost Number One. Sylvia tells a load of underaged Osmonds fans about how she got her end away in Spain this summer. Queen set down a marker for their dominance of the next few years. Ray Stevens fails to get his cock out. After Suzi Quatro says goodbye to the massive bluescreen, the most perfect #1 single EVER is desecrated by the TOTPO. Terry Jacks reminds us that he's still dying, and we close with the Blokes Of Pop taking over and claiming dominance of the year, while Travis plays a Christmas Tree. So long, Early Seventies, you were MINT and SKILL and we'll never see your like again.Taylor Parkes and Rock Expert David Stubbs join Al Needham for a celebration of all things '74, veering off on such tangents as blind West Ham left-backs, Noele Gordon's musical career, five year-olds demanding to be let into sex shops, the era-defining genius of Yus My Dear, disturbing scenes at Wombles gigs, a re-imagining of Do They Know It's Christmas written by Chinnichap, and the introduction of the parlour game that's going to sweep the dinner parties of 2023 – Pantomime Horse. HAPPY NEW SWEARING, POP-CREAZED YOUNGSTERS… Video Playlist | Subscribe | Facebook | Twitter | The Chart Music Wiki | Patreon Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

David Stubbs, Taylor Parkes and Al Needham conclude their excavation of the last TOTP of 1974. After Ray Stevens lets us all down by refusing to lob it out, Suzy Quatro drops the last ever Glam Bomb and then – YESSSS! Carl Douglas gives another demonstration of Chinese-lettered-pyjama funk with the most perfect Number One EVER. Terry Jacks reminds us that he's clinging on to life. And then the winners of 1974 – along with West Germany and Harold Wilson, twice – pitch up to remind us that for the next few years, the charts are going to be under the reign of the Blokes of Pop… Video Playlist | Subscribe | Facebook | Twitter | The Chart Music Wiki | Patreon Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Taylor Parkes and David Stubbs go deeper on the last TOTP of 1974 with Al Needham, and recoil at Dave Lee Travis looking none more Gnasher-like as he salivates over Stephanie De Sykes and then we're hit with Another Chance To See the debut performance of Sparks, the Great Lost Gary Glitter Number One, Another Chance To See Sylvia telling some very young Osmonds fans about how she slagged it about in Spain this summer, and some very unfair jokes at the expense of Brian May…Video Playlist | Subscribe | Facebook | Twitter | The Chart Music Wiki | Patreon Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

David Stubbs, Taylor Parkes and Al Needham begin their odyssey into the second part of TOTP's review of '74, but not before another few rounds of Pantomime Horse and having to deal with the rampaging egos of Noel Edmonds and The Living Gnasher Badge. The first #1 single that ever enraged Al is up first, then John Denver bangs on about his missus eight years before he ends up taking a chainsaw to their bed, followed by world-class mic-standsmanship by Alvin, and George McCrae gets into even more trouble with his missus as he emotes over a turkey carcass, and we don't. Know. Why.Video Playlist | Subscribe | Facebook | Twitter | The Chart Music Wiki | Patreon Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Taylor Parkes and Rock Expert David Stubbs join Al Needham to prepare the ground for an in-depth trawl through one of those end-of-year TOTPs – and this one is a rare Friday teatime excursion through the bangers of 1974, and possibly the last episode from the Golden Age of Top Of The Pops. Naturally, there's a pick through that week's NME, and the introduction of Pantomime Horse, the parlour game poised to sweep the dinner parties of 2023. TUCK IN, POP-CRAZED YOUNGSTERS… Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The latest episode of the podcast which asks; have any of Chart Music ever had to deal with a Hard Lovin' Woman?As listeners to the World's Greatest Podcast About Middle-Aged Hacks Banging On About Old Episodes Of Top Of The Pops, you'll be fully aware of the general consensus on Nineteen Eighty, Pop-Crazed Youngsters; that it was the trough between the stratospheric peaks of '79 and '81. But in this episode, the case for the defence is comprehensively laid out, and if you're here for the coat-downs, you're going to be disappointed, because this episode is a bit SKILL.We're on the cusp of the Great Pop Famine of 1980 – which cost us six issues of NME and MM each and nine portions of our Favourite Thursday Evening Fizzy Pop Treat – and into the final month of the reign of Robin Nash. But although he's on his way out, he's already attempted to drag the show into the Aydeez by raiding the petty cash till for a new set – including a gun tower – and giving a debut cap to the Vicar of Rock himself, a 39 year-old Tommy Vance, who immediately puts himself about and makes a good account of himself, with one or two exceptions.Musicwise, it's a broad and diverse spread of 1980 fare. Leon Haywood gives the youth some timely advice about pegging. New Musik finally get their moment on Chart Music. There's a chance to see American Pipou on Soul Train. The Chords represent the Mod Revival by disguising themselves as Generation X, before we're hit by a megablast of Dadisfaction broadcast live from Bodie and Doyle's living room. Then it's a one-two-three punch of RRRROCKK from Whitesnake, Saxon and Motörhead, interrupted by Errol Brown's mashed potato-mountain of a single, an obligatory dollop of the Nolans, another chance for us to drool over the Beat, Kate Bush being a clingfilm foetus, and a thrilling Number One where the Kids get hit in the face with a holdall, which they deserve for being so sullen and bovine.Simon Price and Neil Kulkarni join Al Needham for a rampage through the middle of the Eighventies, and the tangents come thick and fast, including the correct way to modify a Harrington, the Nagasaki Hellblaster, Skinhead Discos, which living room accoutrements would make the best weapons against a home invasion of Street Punks, how Sham 69 got their name, tales of Machete Max, was Lemmy the Father Seamus Fitzpatrick of Metal, and the introduction of The BPT. SWEARING!Video Playlist | Subscribe | Facebook | Twitter | The Chart Music Wiki | Patreon Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Neil Kulkarni, Simon Price and Al Needham hit the final straight on this very decent episode of The Pops. After getting our obligatory serving of the Nolans, it's the double-Harringtoned attack of The Beat, Kate Bush prepares to go Zorbing in a nudist camp, there's a GLORIOUS Number One, and then we have to listen to Johnny Logan's pain over some kaleidoscopic studio lights. And a BPT update!Video Playlist | Subscribe | Facebook | Twitter | The Chart Music Wiki | Patreon Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Simon Price, Neil Kulkarni and Al Needham continue their voyage into this episode of TOTP, and the thick musk of denim and leather is beginning to permeate the air. Whitesnake! Saxon! Motörhead! Three youths up the front giving themselves a headache! Rude t-shirts! Jimmy Ruffin in a Hawaiian shirt! Close Encounters of the Errol Brown kind! RRROCKKKK! Video Playlist | Subscribe | Facebook | Twitter | The Chart Music Wiki | Patreon Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Neil Kulkarni and Simon Price commence their gleeful rip into this episode of TOTP, egged on by Al Needham. Tommy Vance gets his debut cap, and lords it above everyone else from the confines of his gun tower. Funky Belts! New Musik's keyboard player making a tit of himself! American Pipou! The Chords disguise themselves as Generation X! And some weapons-grade Dadisfaction…Video Playlist | Subscribe | Facebook | Twitter | The Chart Music Wiki | Patreon Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Simon Price and Neil Kulkarni join Al Needham to set the scene for an episode of Top Of The Pops from 1980 which comprehensively demolishes the theory that that year was a bit rammel, breaking off to riffle through that week's issue of Sounds, discuss the pros and cons of organising a skinhead disco, and recoil at the introduction into Chart Music of The BPT…Video Playlist | Subscribe | Facebook | Twitter | The Chart Music Wiki | Patreon Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In the last episode of Chart Music, we broke down Nationwide's Jubilee Fair - an astonishing melange of forelock-tuggery, Trad Jazz and moaning that things were better when we had an empire and National Service, which offered its viewers both an opportunity to revel in the past and a chance to experience what it was going to be like in the entertainment room of a care home in the future. But we stopped short of mentioning one thing: the ending, where the winner of the Nationwide Jubilee Song Contest got the chance to reprise their tune. And we've seen the final – 15 and a bit minutes of musical astonishment So, let us take you back to the post-teatime haze of Thursday May 17th 1977, as the hundreds of musical tributes to the Queen have been whittled down to five, and a nation – or at least, the part of it who isn't watching Crossroads – baits its breath for a Jubular soundclash of monumental proportions. Eric Smallshaw of Eccles gets the party started with a sultry Lancastro-Cuban call to Rhumbic Bacchanalia. The youth of Hucklow First School, Sheffield, praise the Queen with balalaikas for her ability to get on a massive boat and go around the world. Richard Gwyn and Cameo let an entire Principality down with their 'rocking' music. The Farringdon Infants School of Sunderland produce an indecipherable dirge of xylophone-bonging and recorder-blaring. And the Singing Butcher and the Coventry Kids shout their fealty to the Monarchy in a way that only 70s youths and a ginger meat-man can. But who will win? Only Richard Stilgoe knows...Team ATVLand - Neil Kulkarni, Taylor Parkes and Al Needham - sit down and tuck into one of the most gloriously mental slivers of British TV we've ever come across, breaking off to discuss Other People's Children, the Hexham Heads, the difference between United and City fans, the Asian Jubilee Song Contest, and lifeboat crews rescuing a rugby ball in tribute to the Queen, or summat. SHIMMY AND SHAKE TO THE NUMBER, POP-CRAZED YOUNGSTERS!See all acts - and the voting - HERE Last call for our live show on Sept 17th HERE Our GDPR privacy policy was updated on August 8, 2022. Visit acast.com/privacy for more information.

The latest episode of the podcast which asks; are the Wurzels going to float in an eternal hellscape of bodily waste and toenails for singing about turning bulls gay?This episode would have been perfect for the other month while Shakin' Jubilee was occurring – but no matter, Pop-Crazed Youngsters, because we're going right back to the apogee of the Silby Joobs, which no-one ever said in 1977 because people weren't as rubbish as they are today. Flags! Bunting! Street parties! Massive patriotic Yorkshire puddings! Blatant chart-rigging! Your hosts are a) giving thousand-yard stares over some sausage rolls and praying that their father isn't going to run off with a Characterful Dad in a dress and some balloons up their shirt, b) communing with nature with a Jubilee coin in their grubby paw and c) watching some Caledonian ultra-violence outside a pub and pretending to be asleep under a Union Jack listening to their Dad banging on about Elvis again, but they all unite on Thursday evening to witness a Tony Blackburn – who has just invented Fathers 4 Justice – introduce a decidedly mixed bag of Pop treats. Musicwise, it's a veritable trifle of Pop, layered with West Midlands Safari Park Hi-Life, Ormskirk Americana, Southampton Funk, and a thick, satisfying custard of Black American Pop. Frankie Miller pulls a mic stand about. The Pips warm up for a night at the rollerdisco. The Stranglers piss about and stomp on someone's fingers. Demis Roussos lies to us about an island. Neil Innes drags TOTP into 1982. Legs & Co have to make something up on the spot. Bob Marley celebrates Jubilee week by telling us that Britain is rammel and we should clear out as soon as possible. The Wurzels bring us another unflinching examination of rural life. And we get ‘treated' to Little Rabbit Arse. But there's an elephant in bondage trousers in the room, isn't there?Neil Kulkarni and Taylor Parkes join Al Needham for a gargantuan street party of critical analysis, with tangents ahoy – including a trawl through the Nationwide Jubilee Fair, 35 hours of Triangle, Demis Roussos' £30,000 bed, Retirement Pop, the dark link between the Wurzels and the Radio 1 Roadshow, and cycling tips from Simon Bates' massive floating head. If you're a fan of the Monarchy, best skip the first hour – and yes, swearing a –plenty…Video Playlist | Subscribe | Facebook | Twitter | The Chart Music Wiki | Patreon*** Get your tickets for our live show HERE *** Our GDPR privacy policy was updated on August 8, 2022. Visit acast.com/privacy for more information.

Taylor Parkes and Neil Kulkarni join Al Needham to put the Silver Jubilee episode of The Pops firmly to bed, as Legs & Co make do with Demis Roussos' cast-offs, recount the time Bob Marley met the Wurzels, and examine the most shameful event in chart history, as Little Rabbit Arse holds down the Sex Pistols. GOD SAVE HISTOREE, POP-CRAZED YOUNGSTERS…Video Playlist | Subscribe | Facebook | Twitter | The Chart Music Wiki | Patreon*** See us LIVE on Sept 17th *** Our GDPR privacy policy was updated on August 8, 2022. Visit acast.com/privacy for more information.

Taylor Parkes and Neil Kulkarni continue their drill into the Silver Jubilee TOTP with Al Needham. Discover how the Wurzels let down Al at a visit to a farm in 1978! Thrill to the sight of Tony Blackburn pulling a bit of string so Neil Innes can look confused as he waves a tiny flag about! Gasp as the Stranglers take the strings off their instruments, swap them with each other, and slip in a drug reference! And stare aghast at the state of Honky!Video Playlist | Subscribe | Facebook | Twitter | The Chart Music Wiki | Patreon*** See us LIVE on Sept 17th *** Our GDPR privacy policy was updated on August 8, 2022. Visit acast.com/privacy for more information.

Neil Kulkarni, Taylor Parkes and Al Needham continue their journey into the Silver Jubilee episode of Top Of The Pops, pausing to gaze forlornly at Tony Blackburn – who is in full Fathers 4 Justice mode – before being a bit disappointed by Osibisa failing to do the West Midlands Safari Park advert, and having to talk about ELO AGAIN…Video Playlist | Subscribe | Facebook | Twitter | The Chart Music Wiki | Patreon*** See us LIVE on Sept 17th *** Our GDPR privacy policy was updated on August 8, 2022. Visit acast.com/privacy for more information.

Taylor Parkes and Neil Kulkarni join Al Needham for a massive street party to commemorate the Silver Jubilee episode of Top Of The Pops – but before that, it's a coat-down for the Monarchy, a comprehensive breakdown of the Nationwide Jubilee Fair, a flick through that week's Melody Maker, and a look at how the Department of Transport thought that a picture of Simon Bates massive unbespectacled floating head would teach the kids not to get killed on their Grifters in the mid-Eighties. IT'S A POTENTIAL H-BOMB OF AN EPISODE, POP-CRAZED YOUNGSTERS… Video Playlist | Subscribe | Facebook | Twitter | The Chart Music Wiki | Patreon*** See us LIVE on Sept 17th *** Our GDPR privacy policy was updated on August 8, 2022. Visit acast.com/privacy for more information.

The latest episode of the podcast which asks; has anyone ever lost their virginity while listening to a Jive Bunny record?It's the long-awaited return of Our Sarah and Taylor after their encounter with the Spiteful Armoured Bollock, Pop-Crazed Youngsters – and to welcome them back, Al allowed them to pick out an episode. Consequently, we're heading deep into the heart of the Neighties. Your panel are a) being Arthur Seaton in Saturday Night and Sunday Morning without the sex, b) hovering over the pause button during the Top 40, and c) playing Human Frogger on the way to a Blue Boar, while the music scene is awash with flares! Pob faces! That dance where you look like you're walking on a bouncy castle with a pint in each hand! Ridiculously misplaced optimism! And BLEDDEH DRUGS, of course!Musicwise, crikey: we're promised a Rock n' Roll episode by Simon Mayo, who looks absolutely shagged out having been up since 5am, but the overriding theme tonight is British people finally coming to terms with dance music whilst plundering as much of the late Sixties as possible. Wayne Hussey warms up for his date with James Whale with some Pub Goth. New Kids On The Block do something pointless and futile with a basketball. Candy Flip – the Jedward of Madchester – cause the Kids to hysterically scream as if John Lennon had ripped himself from the grave and turned up at the studio to have it out with them. The B-52s have a better night out than you. Big Fun, Fish and Wet Wet Wet get about 20 seconds each. Bobby Omnishake prances like an absolute tit, everyone whoops at an Inspiral Carpets suicide anthem, Jive Bunny throws down some hardcore Dad-Hop, Quentin fancies Lindy I.D.S.T., and we get some actual House music at the end. For about 30 seconds.Sarah Bee and Taylor Parkes join Al Needham for a clinically intensive rummage through the Spring of 1990, veering off on such tangents as a comprehensive drill-down into Mike Read's Heritage Chart, what not to do when cleaning out a Fleshlight, the Stone Roses/New Kids war in the Smash Hits letters page, Showaddywaddy's Bloods/Crips dilemma, how the Martians wisely self-isolated and wore masks for a couple of years, and some remarkably graphic sex talk. And swearing!Video Playlist | Subscribe | Facebook | Twitter | The Chart Music Wiki | Patreon See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Taylor Parkes and Sarah Bee straddle Al Needham and ride him hard in the final furlong of this episode of The Pops, pausing along the way to muse upon the hardcore Dad-hop of Jive Bunny, celebrate an actual decent #1 single, ask if you can get poppers in pound shops, and give full respect to the one with the Gordon Honeycombe hair in Inspiral Carpets. GET ON ONE, POP-CRAZED YOUNGSTERS!Video Playlist | Subscribe | Facebook | Twitter | The Chart Music Wiki | Patreon See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Sarah Bee and Taylor Parkes realign with Al Needham and – like the dog that returns to its own vomit – proceed to tuck in on this episode of The Pops. There's a wodge of Breakers to wade through, followed by a chance for the Dads who were outraged by Candy Flip to have a good laugh at the absolute state of Bobby Omnishake…Video Playlist | Subscribe | Facebook | Twitter | The Chart Music Wiki | Patreon See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Taylor Parkes, Sarah Bee and Al Needham commence their excavation of this episode and rapidly uncover an extremely knackered Simon Mayo introducing some Pub Goth, New Kids On The Block playing some exceedingly futile basketball and trying to show off to some girls, and stare aghast as Candy Flip herald the dawning of the Age of Nadirius...Video Playlist | Subscribe | Facebook | Twitter | The Chart Music Wiki | Patreon See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Sarah Bee, Taylor Parkes and Al Needham ready themselves for a comprehensive rummage through an episode of The Pops from the spring of 1990, leafing through that week's NME and its four-page spread on the Stone Roses chucking some paint about, and a discussion Human Frogger and the deepest of delves into Mike Read's Heritage Chart, before concluding that the world is full of things that you can shove up your arse.Video Playlist | Subscribe | Facebook | Twitter | The Chart Music Wiki | Patreon See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

The latest episode of the podcast which asks; if Steve Miller is in a consensual relationship, and keeps away from certain designated areas, and he's not just doing it to show off in front of his mates, is it acceptable in today's society to reach out and grab her?This episode, Pop-Crazed Youngsters, sees your panel – who are currently toting huge consignments of heroin around Leeds, swiftly climbing up the class system of Coventry and still getting over the terror of finding someone's undergarments in a sex-grafitti'd public toilet in St Pancras station – on the horns of a dilemma; on one hand, a premium-strength episode of Yellow Hurll-era TOTP. On the other, a World Cup semi-final. The latter doesn't kick off until we're 30 minutes into this episode, but at what point do our heroes break and succumb to the boot-on-ball surrender? And will Al have to watch all of this on a black-and-white portable with a coat hanger for an ariel, or will his Dad slink off to the pub and let him watch it downstairs?Musicwise, it's a game of two halves, with two landmark events occurring and a blizzard of Huge Eighties Things being introduced to us for the first time ever. Imagination are at the top of their flouncy, slinky game. Bruno's Dad lamps someone for ripping a speaker off his cab. Jeffrey Daniel reprises the Starman Moment of the Eighties and makes the Weetabix throw their Doc Martens in a skip. AC/DC get their cannons muffled. But just when you think this could be greatest TOTP episode ever, Jonathan King crashes in like Toni Schumacher on Patrick Battiston in order to curl off another dollop of rubbish American rammel (although he introduces the UK to Mr T. And Deeleyboppers).But then! Out of nowhere come the Good Germans – Trio – who produce one of the greatest TOTP performances ever, followed by Odyssey slamming home one of the greatest singles ever, and all is well. But oh dear, that ‘3' button is about to take a hammering as Bananarama pitch up in big nappies, Bucks Fizz take time out from bombing the Ruhr to cheat on each other, Captain Sensible ducks out of the pub to pretend to be the bastard son Worzel Gummidge and Toyah, and some magicians do their underwhelming pieces to the Steve Miller Band. Everything astoundingly life-affirmingly right and groin-punchingly wrong about early-Eighties TOTP is here, and it gets picked over in the usual manner.Rock Expert David Stubbs and Neil Kulkarni join Al Needham for a dance on the car roof of 1982, veering off on such tangents as being nestled against Mr C's packet, the Line-dancing community of Birmingham, being at a loss about what to say to Jimi Hendrix, wondering what ‘Eagle Farm Today' actually means, and Top Of The Pops getting Bobby Gee to fight some swans in a cage in a desperate attempt to keep watching BBC1. And all that lovely swearing, too! Video Playlist | Subscribe | Facebook | Twitter | The Chart Music Wiki | Patreon See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Neil Kulkarni, David Stubbs and Al Needham fight to resist the Siren-like lure of the ‘ITV1' button and the West Germany – France game as this episode of TOTP enters the final stretch. Odyssey drop one of the greatest singles EVER, Bananarama cock a leg in some giant nappies, Bucks Fizz have a day off from bombing Hamburg, Captain Sensible brings along some giant rabbits, and some underwhelming magicians pitch up…Video Playlist | Subscribe | Facebook | Twitter | The Chart Music Wiki | Patreon See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

David Stubbs, Neil Kulkarni and Al Needham continue their intensive tuck-in of a wildly influential episode of The Pops. AC/DC get their cannons muffled, and then Jonathan King introduces the UK to Deeley Boppers, Mr T, and a steaming dollop of white American rubbish. But here come the Germans to save the day!Video Playlist | Subscribe | Facebook | Twitter | The Chart Music Wiki | Patreon See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Neil Kulkarni, David Stubbs and Al Needham commence a gleeful rip into an episode of The Pops smack in the middle of the Yellow Hurll era. And what a start! Kid Jensen pops up in a monarchist Robert Mugabe shirt, Imagination have a proper slink-about, Bruno's dad lamps someone, and Jeffrey Daniel changes the face of shopping precincts on a Saturday for the rest of the decade…Video Playlist | Subscribe | Facebook | Twitter | The Chart Music Wiki | Patreon See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

David Stubbs and Neil Kulkarni join Al Needham for a dance on the car roof of 1982, and prepare the ground for an episode of The Pops from that glorious, World Cup-drenched summer. Prepare for shocking revelations about the toilets in St Pancras Station 40 years ago and how the Rock Expert ended up On Top Of The Pops in someone's codpiece… Video Playlist | Subscribe | Facebook | Twitter | The Chart Music Wiki | Patreon See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

The latest episode of the podcast which asks; does playing Legend by Bob Marley constitute a hate crime?Finally, Chart Music gets off its fat arse, gets on its bike and starts looking for a job, and it's a particularly fraught one: rummaging through an episode from the arse-end of the Yellow Hurll era in an attempt to find anything nourishing and skill. It's the other side of Easter '84, and your panel are a) not bothering to revise for CSEs which are useless in Thatcher's Britain, b) failing to understand the Greek alphabet and wondering why anyone in Coventry would need to learn it, and c) playing gigs in a Barry shopping centre and trying to make acoustic guitars sound like the Jesus and Mary Chain. The good news is that Top Of The Pops is still a beacon of Pop Nowness. The bad news: over a year ahead of schedule, the Dinosaurs of Pop have come lumbering back and Simon Bates – frighteningly – doesn't look out of place in the studio for the first time ever. This, Pop-Crazed Youngsters, is your Dad's Top Of The Pops – a half-hour Radio 2 of the soul. Musicwise, oh dear; there's only one teenager on stage in the entire episode. Morrissey shows how right-on and inclusive he is by letting Sandie Shaw borrow his band for a while. A cursed Mayan mask with the mouth of Phil Collins soundtracks some horrific morning dog-breathed snogging. Belle and the Devotions prepare to be booed at in Luxembourg. Island Records de-Rastacise Bob Marley by 110% and recreate the opening credits of Pigeon Street. Duran Duran make their long-awaited return to the UK and demonstrate that reports of their demise are premature. Willie Nelson and Julio Iglesias practically come on to each other. Our Bands are represented by Echo and the Bunnymen. The Flying Pickets have one last warm against the brazier of the charts before the Massive Clay Head pulls us into its orbit. Neil Kulkarni and Simon Price join Al Needham for a long, hard stare at 1984, whirling off into such tangents as having Xmas ruined by Ed Sheeran, the majesty of studded gauntlets, recreating images of Bob Marley with football mascots, getting punched in the stomach by Eurovision winners, Effing and Jeffing in an Osmonds' house, now not to commence that vital gig in a Chilean prison, petals in beer at Cardiff Uni, and the proud parents of Alien Sex Fiend. GO FOR IT, Pop-Crazed Youngsters – and enjoy all that lovely swearing… Video Playlist | Subscribe | Facebook | Twitter | The Chart Music Wiki | PatreonSubscribe to Our Neil's Substack See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Neil Kulkarni, Simon Price and Al Needham bring this episode of Top Of The Pops to a close by blanching at the sight of Julio Iglesias practically caressing Willie Nelson's beer gut, scratch their heads at Echo and the Bunnymen channelling the spirit of Spinal Tap, witnessing the Flying Pickets performing in front of a massive Guess Who board, and attempting to get a handle on Lionel Richie and his massive clay head…Video Playlist | Subscribe | Facebook | Twitter | The Chart Music Wiki | Patreon See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Simon Price, Neil Kulkarni and Al Needham continue to gingerly pick through the rubble of April '84. After gasping at the outright Lijkenpikkerij of Belle and the Devotions, they tackle Lilt Advert Bob Marley, before getting out of the way of Duran Duran's Come Tsunami…Video Playlist | Subscribe | Facebook | Twitter | The Chart Music Wiki | Patreon See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Neil Kulkarni, Simon Price and Al Needham commence their plunge into this episode of Top Of The Pops, stopping to pay respects to Our Janice and giving Simon Bates's new jacket a thorough examination. There's a rare opportunity to give a slight bit of credit to Morrissey for not being a complete bell-end four decades ago, before blanching at the sight of a Mayan mask with Phil Collins' mouth… Video Playlist | Subscribe | Facebook | Twitter | The Chart Music Wiki | Patreon See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.