Overcoming Child Sexual Abuse ~ With Kathy Andersen

Today, in this finale episode for Season Two, I'm truly thrilled to be joined by Dr. Karen Baikie—all the way from Australia! I started this podcast series in search of knowledge and experiences that can shift us beyond our abuse and trauma, because, as Maya Angelou encouraged us, “When we know better, we do better."  But, turning knowing into doing requires us to experience shifts that are deep and powerful enough to stop our habitual responses that hinder us rather than help us, and that happen faster than the speed of light when we are triggered in every day moments. That's frustrating and it's incredibly tiring for us all. So, I found Dr. Karen Baikie – an expert in The Hakomi Method, which enables us to experience those deep and powerful shifts, and turn the triggers that frustrate us, into allies that help us identify where and how we need to resolve trauma, and change our present day reactions into helpful and healthy growth-oriented responses. Through the Hakomi Method, Karen helps us tap into the innate wisdom and intelligence in our bodies to safely lead us through healing and into restoration and growth.In this podcast, I'm handing over the reigns to Karen to take me, and you, through three Hakomi experiences to tap into our places of safety, meet a part of ourselves that holds unresolved trauma, and gently and safety release some of the “stuckness” of that trauma that keeps us responding in old and harmful ways. It's a journey—and I hope you experience some potentially life-shifting moments in this slightly longer podcast. By the end, I think you'll be glad you hung in there! I was!

Today, I'm joined by Katherine Barner - counsellor, coach, grief & trauma expert, author, speaker, and advocate against child sexual abuse. Katherine experienced child sexual abuse when she was fourteen, and her journey through abuse and other life trauma have fueled her journey to help others in the work to which she dedicates herself. In this podcast, we're going to talk about Beyond Trauma and Loss – Breaking The Silence Cycle. Katherine encourages people, “The truth is, life is tough and sometimes really bad things happen. I know because I've had my share—from abuse to divorce, to financial hardship, and loss. But one of the things you'll hear me say frequently is, “life happens to all of us, but the true story is told in how we respond to what has happened.””Katherine earned her BA in Psychology from Spelman College, and a Masters in Education in Counseling from the University of North Texas. She is a certified crisis responder, Clinical Trauma Specialist, and trained EMDR practitioner.When Katherine is not consulting with clients, creating content for the women she serves, prepping for a speaking engagement, or writing, you'll find her spending time with her family and closest friends.  Katherine and her husband call Houston, Texas, home – and are parents to four adult children and one amazing granddaughter.

Today, I'm joined by Naomi Halpern, Director of Delphi Training and Consulting which has achieved international recognition for its pioneering work in the fields of complex trauma, attachment, PTSD and dissociative disorders. Naomi is also co-author of the book Trauma Model Therapy, and a Fellow of the International Society for the Study of Trauma and Dissociation.Since 2009, Naomi has been a consultant to the United Nations developing and delivering a broad range of trauma informed programs to personnel in missions and duty stations around the world. She has a wealth of experience working with people across socioeconomic groups, faiths, and sexual orientation.Naomi has presented trainings on complex and developmental trauma, resilience-building and workplace wellbeing through Delphi and the United Nations, across Australia, Africa, Denmark, Germany, India, Italy, Lebanon, New Zealand, Thailand, and the United States.Naomi points us to the words of Viktor Frankl in one of her favorite quotes, “Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom.”In this podcast, we dive into how we can grow and achieve our freedom as we all continue on our journey to overcome the impacts of child sexual abuse and trauma in our daily lives so we can be all we are here to be!

Today, I'm thrilled to be joined once again by Dr. Clare Marriott. Clare is a Clinical Psychologist working in the U.K. In 2006, Clare completed her doctoral thesis, investigating factors promoting resilience in adults who have experienced childhood sexual abuse. Clare focuses her work on recovery, and in finding things that sustain people outside of the therapy room. During her time as a Clinical Psychologist, Clare has worked with people with chronic mental health challenges and is currently Consultant Clinical Psychologist and Interim Clinical Lead for the Recovery Pathway in Northamptonshire Healthcare Foundation Trust in the UK.Clare first joined us in Season One of Overcoming Child Sexual Abuse, and we both realized there was an important conversation to be shared on Recovery Fatigue—how we keep on our path to all we want for our lives without feeling exhausted and so tired along the way that we give up, or lose hope. Our path is here for us to experience all the happiness and meaning we desire, so today, we're going to talk about how to move through recovery fatigue, and share some learning and practices to help us keep overcoming our childhood trauma and move forward with energy, motivation, and the power of our unlimited possibilities.

Today, I'm thrilled to be joined by Dr. Arielle Schwartz, PhD. Dr. Schwartz encourages us, “You are not broken, in need of fixing. Rather, you are deeply hurt, in need of care.” As a practicing clinical psychologist, Dr. Schwartz helps people navigate the difficult challenges we have in our lives by focusing on the whole person – mind and body - to help recover from traumatic events, find relief from depression or anxiety, develop and keep meaningful and nurturing relationships, and break free from destructive habits that can derail our lives.Dr. Schwartz is the developer of Resilience-Informed Therapy - a strengths-based, mind and body trauma treatment model that applies research on resilience to form a positive and “whole person” approach to trauma recovery that includes Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (known as EMDR), somatic (or body-centered) psychology, internal parts work, and mind-body-based approaches (including therapeutic yoga and mindfulness practices).Dr. Schwartz holds a  Ph.D. in Clinical Psychology, and a Master's degree in Somatic Psychology, as well as a Bachelors degree in in Psychology. She is a trainer for therapists internationally and specializes in PTSD, Complex PTSD, Therapeutic Yoga for Trauma, Resilience, and Post Traumatic Growth. Dr. Schwartz's books include: The Post-Traumatic Growth Guidebook, Trauma Recovery: A Mind-Body Approach to Becoming Whole, The Complex PTSD Workbook, and EMDR Therapy & Somatic Psychology, among others. When Dr. Schwartz is not working she loves being a mom and exploring the trails of nature. 

Today, we're joined by Timika Chambers. Timika is a thriving survivor – a lioness, as she describes herself. Timika was born in Memphis, Tennessee.  At the age of 4 ½, Timika's mother bought one-way bus tickets for herself and her three children – all under the age of 5 – to leave an abusive marriage. But for Timika, soon after, that journey turned into what she describes as, “the dark wilderness of sexual abuse by two family members.” Timika found purpose in healing herself and others through nursing, and then, even more-so, through writing. Today, Timika shares her story of finding purpose and healing with us. Timika holds a Master's degree as a Nurse Educator and a Bachelor of Science degree in Nursing, and has over 20 years experience in the healthcare industry. 

   Today, we're joined by the wonderful Dr. Lindsay Gibson. Dr. Gibson dramatically and importantly spotlights how the “emotional immaturity” of parents can hinder and hold us back in our adulthood, and how we can regain trust in ourselves and break free from the destructive and confusing effects of negative “programming” from childhood.    In her book, Who You Were Meant To Be, Dr. Gibson focuses on how people can reconnect with their true self and sense of purpose, especially after experiencing negative parental impacts in childhood. In her subsequent books, Dr. Gibson introduces “Emotionally Immature Parents” and provides learning and tools to overcome the impacts of these parents, and how to rely on our own emotional guidance, strengthen our self-awareness, and increase our energy to live a full, happy, and purposeful life in adulthood.   Dr. Gibson holds a Master's degree and a Doctorate of Psychology in Clinical Psychology, and has also taught doctoral students in Clinical Psychology. She specializes in adult psychotherapy and personal growth counseling.    As Dr. Gibson highlights, “Your true self is so much more than your family role. Your past identity may have been formed in your relationship with your parents, but who you will become derives from your relationship to yourself.”    We went a bit longer on this podcast because you can imagine there was a quite a lot to talk about – so if you need to break up your listening, please do – because there's great insights through until the very end!

Today, I'm thrilled to be joined by Dr. Pat Ogden, PhD - a pioneer in somatic psychology, and the creator of the Sensorimotor Psychotherapy method. Dr. Ogden is founder of the Sensorimotor Psychotherapy Institute and co-founder of the Hakomi Institute; she is trained in a huge range of somatic and psychotherapeutic approaches to healing and wellness, and has over 45 years of experience working with individuals and groups.Throughout this podcast, you'll hear us refer to the word somatic, which just means relating to or affecting the body—and often, especially after childhood abuse and trauma, that's what we're most disconnected from.The body holds our trauma, but it also holds the keys to our healing.In this podcast, Dr. Ogden shares with us how the body has the innate intelligence and wisdom to reveal where and how we need to heal trauma that is still showing up in our adult lives—and that sometimes we're not even aware of that trauma until it's triggered in every day, present moments. In these moments, we have the choice to listen to the signals, sensations, and suggestions from our bodies to guide our next steps and respond differently to move forward into wellness and happiness.

Today, I feel so deeply deeply grateful to have Dr. Richard C. Schwartz PhD with us. I was so powerfully moved by Dr. Schwartz's work before I spoke with him, and as you'll hear, I have been even more powerfully moved by his work—unexpectedly in this podcast! —and I hope you will find that helpful during this experience today, as well as on your ongoing journey.In his most recent book, No Bad Parts, which features a foreword by Alanis Morissette, Dr. Schwartz shows us empowering new ways of understanding and healing the many parts that make us who we are. As Dr. Schwartz teaches, “Our parts can sometimes be disruptive or harmful, but once they're unburdened, they return to their essential goodness. When we learn to love all our parts, we can learn to love all people - and that will contribute to healing the world.”Dr. Schwartz began his career as a family therapist and an academic at the University of Illinois at Chicago. There, he discovered that family therapy alone did not achieve full symptom relief and in asking patients why, he learned that they were plagued by what they called “parts.” These patients became his teachers as they described how their parts formed networks of inner relationship that resembled the families he had been working with. He also found that as they focused on and, thereby, separated from their parts, they would shift into a state characterized by qualities like curiosity, calm, confidence and compassion. He called that inner essence the Self and was amazed to find it even in severely diagnosed and traumatized patients. From these explorations the Internal Family Systems (IFS) model was born in the early 1980s, and in 2000, Dr. Schwartz founded the Center for Self Leadership, now known as the IFS Institute.IFS is now evidence-based and has become a widely-used form of psychotherapy, particularly with trauma. It provides a non-pathologizing, optimistic, and empowering perspective and a practical and effective set of techniques for working with individuals, couples, families, and more recently, corporations and classrooms.Dr. Schwartz has been adjunct faculty of the Department of Psychiatry at Harvard Medical School and has devoted his career to evolving and sharing IFS, which now is being taught all over the world. Dr. Schwartz is a featured speaker at many conferences and has published more than 50 articles and books about IFS and other psychotherapy topics. 

Today, I'm so thrilled to have Deb Dana (LCSW) join us. Deb is a clinician, author, speaker, and consultant specializing in using the lens of Polyvagal Theory to understand and resolve the impact of trauma and create ways of living that allow us to positively re-train and shift our nervous system responses. Deb's work helps us master the skills to become more aware of our nervous system in each moment—and change the way we respond to the big and small challenges of life—especially after childhood abuse and trauma.Do you remember a recent conversation that "set you off?" Or, a triggering moment with your partner or loved one? Or even a social media post that "over-activated" you? These interactions can cause us to react as if they are life-threatening encounters because our bodies perceived them as threats from past trauma. Deb's work on the Polyvagal approach to living shows us how we can re-train our nervous system to respond in the present with new choices, safety, and connection.Deb developed the Rhythm of Regulation Clinical Training Series and lectures internationally on ways Polyvagal Theory helps trauma survivors. Deb is founding member of the Polyvagal Institute, and her publications include The Polyvagal Theory in Therapy: Engaging the Rhythm of Regulation; Polyvagal Exercises for Safety and Connection: 50 Client-Centered Practices; and the Polyvagal Flip Chart: Understanding the Science of Safety.Deb is the creator of the audio program Befriending Your Nervous System, in partnership with SoundsTrue.Deb's just-published book is a MUST READ—it's called Anchored: How to Befriend Your Nervous System Using Polyvagal Theory.Again, I'm so thrilled and grateful to have Deb join us for this podcast—there is just so much to learn and so many take-aways here!

In this episode, I'm thrilled to be launching Season Two with the extraordinary, amazing, and so beautiful and generous, Jack Canfield. Jack is probably most famous as the creator of the Chicken Soup for the Soul series – and he lives his life to help others create all they desire in their lives! Jack is a Multiple New York Times bestselling author of —The Success Principles, The Power of Focus, The Aladdin Factor, Dare to Win, The Key to Living the Law of Attraction, Living the Success Principles, Coaching for Breakthrough Success, and he also featured in The Secret. Jack has taught millions of people around the world how to transform their lives and live with meaning, joy, purpose and happiness and we're going to talk all about that today – how we can each overcome all of the bad stuff, and with our full intention and awareness and positive choices, make changes to step into all that truly makes us happy and leap out of bed each morning – we can live that life – it's never too late – to start, to heal, and to stay on our journey to living our fullest and happiest lives — and that's what this podcast is all about!

In this final episode for season one, we talk about our freedom to heal and some profoundly powerful practices that can help us transform our trauma into healing. That's our freedom, and it's the choice we have. You may be surprised that practices we may have dismissed or don't fully understand, can be the keys to shifting our minds and bodies into a state of daily healing. Day by day, those small shifts can add up to "tip" us from ill-being into well-being—in our physical health and in our states of mind. I am so grateful that Dr. Dyan Haspel-Johnson is joining us to share some learnings and practices that give us the opportunity to think, feel, and heal differently. In particular, we're going to talk about how the three practices of sleep, hypnosis and somatic healing, can be keys to shifting our physical and mental well-being, and waking up each day feeling energized, at ease, and excited to journey forward into all we want for our lives. It's never too late, and it's our freedom to heal! 

"Not me, not now" can be one of our most limiting thoughts as we move beyond our hardships and into our happiness. In this podcast episode, I'm doing things a little differently! I'll share a glimpse into the draft of my upcoming book, Yes You, Yes Now! In particular, we'll focus on "Seeing the "All" of You in the Mirror."  As we look in the mirror, we can choose to see our unlimited selves, beyond the struggles and uncertainties we face in our lives. We'll also step into some practices, including a guided visualization, to help shift our "Not Me, Not Now" thoughts into "Yes Me, Yes Now!" As we journey together, we can be inspired by the words of Michelangelo, “I saw an angel in the marble and carved until I set him free.” With each practice, you are carving a piece of the block of marble that will ultimately reveal your “all” and set you free. I hope you join this slightly "different" podcast episode and take a journey with me!

Join me and Dr. Sousan Abadian, PhD, as we talk about “cracking ourselves open to allow the light to enter,” and Sousan's upcoming book, Free Me To Love. I first met Sousan at Harvard Kennedy School 15 years ago and I was immediately captivated by her spirit, her wisdom, and her visionary work to help communities recover from trauma in order to move forward. Over the years, I've come to learn so much more of Sousan's personal story of overcoming trauma, and it is profoundly powerful, moving, and inspiring. I know it will help so many people. Sousan has an amazing background—she is an Iranian-born scholar who dedicates herself to the work of enhancing human capabilities and well-being. She has an independent practice teaching, speaking, and consulting internationally on leadership, collective trauma, and personal, social, and cultural change.  She earned a Ph.D. in Political Economy and Government from Harvard University, an M.P.A. in International Development from Harvard's Kennedy School, and an M.A. in the Anthropology of Social Change and Development, also from Harvard University.  In Free Me To Love, Sousan shares her story of “the day her life fell apart” and how that shockwave shattered so many parts of her life, despite her outward success—as she shares, “This is my story of how woundedness kept knocking and I ignored it, until its rap and insistence grew and cracked me open to allow the light to enter.”In this episode, we begin by talking about our self beliefs and perceptions—overcoming the tangled childhood stories we still tell ourselves; then we talk about how trauma and wounds affect the roles we play in our adult lives—as wives, mothers, and professionals; and we end by talking about choosing and co-creating a positive and thriving future—moving through, within, and “beyond” childhood trauma.

In this episode, I'm joined by the love of my life, Laura Kozelouzek. When we met, my life began again—beyond abuse and beyond all the things that hold us back and limit us. "Unbound" defines how Laura and I love each other, how we step into each day together, how we overcome the challenges of our past, and how we adventure forward together. When Laura and I met, we both felt a thousand lifetimes coming together as one. We both have our tragedy and trauma, and we both have our "unbinding" and breaking free. Now, unbound with each other, we are beginning life again in love.  In this episode, we'll talk about: Growing together through vulnerability and truth; Confronting the triggers that can break us and our relationships; Sharing our traumas and tragedies (Laura reveals her family tragedy); and, Living limitlessly together "unbound," and adventurously "beginning again" in each moment!All of us have the opportunity to live "unbound" and to "begin again" each day—with the dreams we have, the choices we make, the thoughts we think, and the actions we take. We share our story to put ourselves fully "out there," and "as is," with you on our journey—and hope you find connection between our story and yours. After all, we are all connected in this imperfect, yet perfect, experience of life, love, tragedy, trauma, and overcoming limitlessly!  

Join me with author, Chandra Moyer, as we talk about The Courage To Confront & Heal Broken Family Relationships & Our Wounded Self.  We'll share Chandra's story and dive into three topics: 1. Finding power and peace in confronting and healing our childhood trauma, 2. The good, the bad, and the ugly of telling our mothers and family members of abuse, 3. Loving ourselves and family beyond abuse and into happiness.Chandra is a sought-after speaker, author, life coach, and a decorated former Army officer. Chandra is also a survivor of incest who only recovered her memories of abuse later in life after a traumatic adult experience triggered memories of a childhood of abuse.  Chandra's recent book, I Met Her Before, tells her story to help others come to terms with their truth and move forward into the full and happy life we all desire and deserve. Chandra's story not only confronts her own shattered past, but also the broken family relationships that are part of healing and becoming who we're fully here to be—and often healing those family relationships is just as challenging as healing ourselves. We'll dive into this together in this podcast. I know this will be a conversation that will move you and hopefully help you as we all continue to heal ourselves and our relationships on our paths to happiness.

In this episode, join me and distinguished clinical psychologist, Dr. Clare Marriott PhD., as we talk about ways to build resilience and positive growth habits to help step beyond childhood trauma and into a life determined by our choices, not by our abuse. Dr. Marriott's work has focused on factors that build resilience among survivors of child sexual abuse. Many of us never had the chance to tap into resources to help us ~ many of us were simply in survival mode. Child sexual abuse was a topic that was taboo, and seeking help was often beyond us. Today, there is more understanding and more tools to help.  We'll talk about, 1. Building Resilience:  What we know and what we can do now in adulthood, 2. C.H.I.M.E ~ A personal recovery and growth framework to help step into a happy life beyond abuse, and 3. Leaving unhealthy coping habits behind and creating positive growth habits in our daily lives. Join us! It's never too late to overcome the impact of child sexual abuse ~ let's do it together!

Join me as I talk with Dr. Jennifer Freyd, PhD, to understand how betrayal from childhood trauma “show ups” in our adulthood, and ways we can overcome those effects.How Abusers Silence Victims and How That Affects Us In Adulthood.The Courage To Confront: The Good, The Bad, & "The How?"Women In The Workplace: Overcoming The “Silent and Hidden Barriers” from Childhood Trauma.Dr. Freyd is the founder of The Center for Institutional Courage, and Professor Emerit of Psychology, at the University of Oregon. She's also Affiliated Faculty at the Women's Leadership Lab at Stanford University.  Dr. Freyd is world-renowned for her work on Betrayal trauma, Institutional Betrayal and Courage, and for her framework (DARVO) that identifies strategies used by abusers to manipulate their victims. That framework is so widely-known that actress, political activist, and sexual assault survivor, Ashley Judd, referenced it when discussing the Harvey Weinstein sexual abuse allegations in an interview with Diane Sawyer in 2017. Dr. Freyd has also been interviewed extensively by media in relation to the Harvey Weinstein case, and is sought internationally to talk about ways individuals can overcome childhood trauma, and how institutions play a role through betrayal and courage. Dr. Freyd's books and speaking appearances have reached millions of people around the world.

In Part 2 of this podcast with Dr. Meg Jay PhD, we'll break more myths, and dig deeper into insights and tools to help overcome child sexual abuse: we'll start by talking about "Naming It To Tame It” - the negative impact of keeping secrets and the freedom in sharing; then, we'll talk about depression– acknowledging it, tending to it, and overcoming it; and finally, we'll talk about the “thing” that makes your life yours – deciding what you want and fully living it!

Join me with the extraordinary Dr. Meg Jay PhD (Dr. Jay's TED Talk is one of the most viewed TED Talks with almost 12 million views—that's because she is truly an inspiration and a voice of wisdom and knowledge!). In Part 1 of this podcast episode, we'll break myths and leap into discovery and tools to help overcome child sexual abuse: New insights that help us to understand how childhood trauma affects adults; the notion of “normal” and how that helps or harms us; and how our adult choices, not our childhood abuse, can lead to living a life that is happy and fulfilled.

Join me with the extraordinary Dr. Meg Jay PhD (Dr. Jay's TED Talk is one of the most viewed TED Talks with almost 12 million views—that's because she is truly an inspiration and a voice of wisdom and knowledge!). In Part 1 of this podcast episode, we'll break myths and leap into discovery and tools to help overcome child sexual abuse: New insights that help us to understand how childhood trauma affects adults; the notion of “normal” and how that helps or harms us; and how our adult choices, not our childhood abuse, can lead to living a life that is happy and fulfilled.

Overcoming Child Sexual Abuse is a positive and uplifting podcast series to help overcome the struggles that remain in our adult lives from experiences of child sexual abuse. In this series, Kathy Andersen, award-winning self-development author and survivor of a childhood of sexual abuse, brings together leading experts and inspiring contributors in areas including positive and clinical psychology, self-mastery and development, and trauma recovery to share practical approaches and new learnings to help adults break free from the ongoing trauma, triggers, and turmoil of child sexual abuse and create a life filled with authentic happiness. It's never too late to overcome abuse and live the life that sets you free! Subscribe today at overcomingchildsexualabuse.com and look out for the launch details for the first episode with the wonderful Dr. Meg Jay on Thursday, May 27! Let's do this together!