Film Critters

Hello fans of film. Today's episode we review Aaron Sorkins straight to Netflix (this is not a slur) movie The Trial of the Chicago 7. We briefly skim through the new Disney investors onslaught of new series coming over the next 200 years and why Nolan is shitting his pants. We delve in Tom Cruises' latest outburst with differing opinions, review the ancient classic Citizen Kane and generally wonder where the hell 2020 went. In the words of Tom Cruise - "Lick my fucking toast again and i'll have you all flogged!"

Film Critters...Episode 78 Well hellooooooo film fanatics. We're in the final stretch of our Oscar's death race super view-a-thon. This week we review The Lighthouse, Ford v Ferrari, Star Wars IX, Richard Jewell, Harriet, Breakthrough, For Sama, Klaus and The Lion King.

Film Critters...Episode 77. This podcast is definitely funny and informative and life-changing. Listen to it now. We review Joker, Frozen 2, Honeyland, Ad Astra, Little Women, A Beautiful day in the Neighbourhood, Judy and Jojo Rabbit.

Film Critters...Episode 76. Oscar season is well underway so we're going to be reviewing a shit ton of films every week now lead by yer boi 1917. We stick with out usual format of burps and swearing and political based angst. Reviewed in total is Bombshelll, American Factory, The Two Popes, Knives Out, The Edge of Democracy, The Irishman and I Lost My Body. Witch a Coin to your Tosser.

Godjul ya filthy animals! After a hiatus for no good reason we are back to shout, swear, laugh and burp our way through this holiday season. On this episode we review the festive divorce romp-a-thon Marriage Story, cry a tear for our doomed country, spill a beer for the shite movies coming up in 2020 and deliver our favourite films of 2019. Also reviewed are John Wick 3 and The Interceptors.

Hello film fraternity. This week we review the new feelgood Boss-fest Blinded by the Light. We crawl down the rabbit hole of America's ongoing obsessive gun cult, shit our pants at the worlds ongoing data breaches and question why the fuck Dave is still watching Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. Also reviewed are The Great Hack and Burning. Shameless plug.....Watch our new video for Rolo Tomassi's "A Flood of Light". Thank you. Bye.

Hello lovely folk of the world. We hope your lives are filled with hope and wonder. Today we review the lovely indie Irish drama Animals. We discuss Russia why Kevin Smith has lost weight and our most upsetting Scientologist discovery. We also review and, equally hate, Young Offenders and Intacto. And remember, if you think Guy Ritchie and Quentin Tarantino are the greatest filmmakers are all time then you are quite simply, a twat.

Good day to you amoeba's. This week review the summer spooky Midsommar. We tear into the world of keyboard-warrior gimps, praise the idiots running into Area 51 and discuss a whole host of super cool movies in development, Sonic not included. Also reviewed is Brassed Off and Journeyman. In the words of the true cinematic legend that is Quentin Tarantino....."everybody can absolutely just fuck off and stop looking at me".

Proper nice friends of film. Welcome to our hour of nonsensical film chat and random burps. This week we review Toy Story 4. Morrissey features heavily so we apologise for your ears. We discuss our recent Rolo Tomassi video shoot, try and cast our film version of Bioshock and share our love of Trolls. Also reviewed is a big double hitter review of one of our favourite movies Trollhunter. Never listen to this podcast if you are a Christian.

Hello worms. Welcome to episode 69 (OH FUCKING LOL) of the hit film review show. This week we delve into the new Netflix sci-fi I am Mother. We tier the best fighters in Game of Thrones, discuss the political machinations of 80's Germany and take a trip to gay hell. Touch us.

Hello worms. On this weeks riveting episode of the popular film review show we take a look at the recently Netflix acquired Danish thriller The Guilty. The episode takes place hours before our first public screening of We Progress so we suitably skittish in a Wimbledon pub. Also reviewed is The Tree of Life and To the Bone. Like Tarantino says on set every day 'put my mate into a car and drive it full pelt into a tree and pay me millions and I've got a well annoying voice so I should fuck off'.

Hello Babbies. Welcome to another riveting episode of the unpopular film review show Film Critters! This week we review the excellent Booksmart. We scream about how shit biopics are nowadays, how shit YouTube "influencers" can be and how NOT shit Booksmart is. Also reviewed are Control and Eighth Grade. Now go see Booksmart before more money is plied into an inevitable Jimmy Saville biopic and not original stories.

Hello film lovers. After what seems likes almost 10 years we're back with Season 3 of pointless shouting. This week we review the weak Godzilla: King of the Monsters. We run through everything Cannes, run through a months worth of watching tv shows and slap Moby on his egg-based head. Also reviewed is Waltz with Bashir and Shot Caller. In the words of the aforementioned Moby " Can i come lie in your bunk bed whilst you're asleep like an absolute fucking weirdo?"

Film Critters Season 2 finale? The last episode for a while whilst the ladz jet off around the world for a month. We obviously review Avengers: Endgame with surprising results. We talk live action rugrats, we talk Game of Thrones, we talk Chernobyl and we talk Robin Thicke......Also reviewed are Pre-Destination and The Thin Red Line. Goodbye for now. We resume normal shite talking film reviews next month.

Greetings fans of films and shouting. From the beautifully sunny setting of a South London garden we review the new western The Sisters Brothers. We have an early preview of Cannes, David has a shocking revelation of what tv show he is going to re-watch for the 108th time and porntache is Master Chief. Also reviewed are The Spirit of '45 and Skeleton Twins. In the words of Will Smith.....'I only want to be a blue genie so that James Cameron will start having text sex with me again'.

Hello film lovers. This week we review the spooky turd of a movie Pet Sematary. There is a contest between what is worse, the entire western world or migraines, David finally admits the new Sonic looks weird as hell and James has a hangover the size of Manhattan. Also reviewed is The Perks of being a Wallflower and Green Room. *Spoiler* Under no exaggeration, the best performance in Pet Sematary is by that fucking cat.

This is a podcast. Hosted by James and David. We review films. This week we review I Think We're Alone Now. We do not like wordart. We do no like Barbara Streisand. We do not like Goblin Slayer. We do like Fish Tank and The Endless. Which we review. Because this is a podcast.

Hello our big sexy film fanatics. This week we review Jordan Peele's new spooky number, Us. We talk about all the good stuff like Brexit, the Disney/Fox merger and of course Lorraine Kelly. Also reviewed are Spring and Headhunters. Shit description this. Good podcast though.

Hello Michael Jackson fans! This week we review Marvels latest juggernaut Captain Marvel, with a surprising differing view on the film. We count down the actors with the most on screen deaths, have a very big anti-James Cameron section and get freaked out by the amount of Michael Jackson innocent buses flying past live. Also reviewed is Resolution and Attack the Block. So, as all of those MJ kid's mothers would say 'if you fancy a go, sure, dig in'.

Good day everybody. We'd say the front cover picture makes more sense if you listen to the podcast. But it doesn't. This week we review the lovely Fighting with my Family. Michael Jackson pops his beautiful head up, Sonic the Hedgehog is spoken of too much and James reveals a deep, dark secret. Also reviewed are (finally) How to train your Dragon: The hidden World and Searching. As R-Kelly always said "Pass me the sugar........child".

Hello 24 hour party people. Back to normal business now as we review the turd sandwich that is Alita: Battle Angel. We have a brief shout about the momo meme, a bizarre male sex guru and sing our definitive version of the Oscar winning tune Shallow. Also reviewed are Blockers and for some reason Lawnmower Man. For fucks sake.

Helloooooooooooo. Super cool Oscars special. We have a good old musical rage at the songs of Mary Poppins Returns, give the Oscars ceremony organisation the usual amount of shit and give our predictions for all categories in this years Oscars. Reviewed is Free Solo, Mary Queen of Scots and Mary Poppins Returns. Also reviewed are all short animations, short live actions and short documentaries. We hope you enjoy the length of this episode. As James Cameron famously quoted on the set of Titanic, "If you don't get your kit off and let him draw you i'm going to make another 4 Avatar films". He lied.

Hello best mates! Very special episode this as we massively disagree on almost all the movies we're reviewing. We lay into many easy targets such as The Academy, racists and Will Smith being a big blue idiot. Whilst reviewing Of Fathers and Sons, Mirai, Spiderman: Into the Spider-verse, At Eternitys Gate, Hale County This Morning, This Evening and Border.  Ps. Episode features trolls, not goblins.

Well hello you big bunch of film loving fools. This week we review the excellent If Beale Street could talk. We are able to find the downright weirdest film that Gary Oldman has ever been a part of, offer our views on the controversy surrounding Liam Neeson and basically laugh at how Alita: Battle Angel is going to be the worst film of all time. Also reviewed are Can you Ever Forgive Me?, Capernaum, RBG, Incredibles 2 and Christopher Robin. What are you waiting for? Fucking listen to this!

Good day film fanatics. The week we review the Oscar favourite Green Book. We get rowdy over shoddy journalism, get excited over Japanese cartoons and ironically hate over the academy. Also reviewed are loads of Oscar nommed movies, Minding the Gap, Ralph Breaks the Internet, The Wife, The Ballad of Buster Scruggs and Bohemian Rhapsody.

Hello family of film heads. Today we review the new Christian Bale fat lad epic Vice. We discuss all the Oscar nominations, Razzie nominations and Goblin nominations whilst chilling in our South London beer garden. We're joined by a clutter of random friends, talk about the joys of Red Dead Redemption 2 and toast a wee dram of whiskey for Burns night. Also reviewed are The Hunchback of Notre Dame and All About Eve courtesy of Anna Fordham. As the late George Bush senior once said "I'd rather marry my horse than a man".

Hello fans of all things film. This week we have a special guesty guest, actress Anna Fordham just join us in loving film and hating people. Love all over the lovely Stan and Ollie and hate all over The Rock, The Sun, R-Kelly, the internet, goblins etc. Also reviewed is  (deep breath) The assassination of Jesse James by the coward Robert Ford and Tyrannosaur.

Hello fellow fools of January. The idiots review the new Netflix sensation Bird Box whilst shivering in an empty beer garden. We mull over all things Bafta and Golden Globe, Piers Morgan pops up for the 400th time and everyone drops a nut over the cast announcements for Dune. Also reviewed are About Time and Prince Avalanche.

Welcome to Episode 50, smashing it's way through 2019 with the usual pointless observations, unhinged anger and film reviews. This week is Yorgos Lanthimos' The Favourite. There is a lengthy discussion on goblins, a chatter about naked old men and somehow Kevin Spacey slithers back in with some absolute weirdness. Also reviewed is Rare Exports and The Fundamentals of Caring. Goblin-kun

Tis the bloody season! Welcome to a super cool xmas special as James and David reminisce over the years top films, as well as the absolute shitters that graced the big screen. They join the ranks of the 8 people in the world the actually went to see the big flop Mortal Engines, and review it. They share their secret santa gifts to each other live, rundown their top 10 best of the year and top 5 worst, all the while necking beer and whiskey. Also reviewed are 21 Grams and Macbeth. Have a great xmas folks and see you in the new year.

Hello people who like films. A wet, windy and half-hungover episode hailing from deepest South London where Jim and Dim review the stunning Roma. Dogs, fat Llamas, James Corden and the most awful on-screen death feature briefly. Also reviewed is the long Bone Tomahawk and the miserable doggy movie, Amos Perros. Remember, as Katy Perry always said, "Yeah that Russell Brand lad was a knobhead."

Hello friends of film. A super special one year anniversary episode (absolutely nothing special happens) of your favourite film based nonsense. Reviewed this week is the sweet and beautiful Shoplifters. The 2019 golden globe nominations are in, a sociopathic cat is endured and Kevin Hart gets a hell of a character arc. Also reviewed are Detroit and Submarine. In the famous words of the loveable Kevin Hart…..'I love absolutely everyone except a certain minority of which I hate with all my heart. Hire me'.

On a very boozy Sunday afternoon the boys recorded a podcast before a fantastic north London derby. They reviewed many things including life, american corporatism, racism, pacifism, Sorry to Bother You, Star Wars pod racer, A testament of youth, The King of Comedy, chips and many more things that did and did not need reviewing. As David Gregory once said "I am nothing if not honest, and I'm not honest...ever"

David and his James review the Steve McQueen thriller Widows whilst freezing their moobs off in a beer garden. James is on particularly spiteful form, David plays a spooky computer game and everyone agrees 45 day invoices are fucking stupid. Also reviewed are Gone Home (the computer game) and They shall not grow Old.

RIP Stan Lee Back on hallowed ground (The Bull pub) as Dave and James review the new Netflix banger The Outlaw king. Armie Hammer goes mad, Aaron Taylor-Johnson is off his nut and Withnail is on another planet. Also the Dumbo trailer looks fucking shit. Also reviewed is Collossal and Withnail and I. As Tim Burton says every time he makes a film....'I want that fucking stupid lass in my film, my wife, Helena Bonham Carter.

Super special train based episode. James and Dave, on a Leeds to London super off peak Virgin pendolino, review the greatest film of all time Mandy. Chris Martin gets some shit for being a flannel, random train passengers are accosted and.......Cheddar Goblin. Also reviewed are Take Shelter and Kodachrome. Cheddar Goblin has 60% more cheddar......Beautiful.

It's our spooky special! The scariest episode yet whilst at the same time being completely the same as all the others. Our main review is obviously the reboot-sequel-prequel Halloween. We go into detail why Making a Murderers' Ken Kratz is the worst man on the planet whilst a case is made for James Corden being the worst man on the planet and Michael Shannon is praised as the demi-god that he is. Steven Avery said it best when he said 'I murdered her and would do it again in a heartbeat'.

Hello folks. James and Dave have special guest James Owen (bloke northern mate and radio show host) on to discuss/review/shout about Paul Greengrass's new Netflix beast July 22. Many beers are drunk, James buzzes on a recent lecture on horror films and much love is sent over to Roman Reigns. Also reviewed are A Place beyond the Pines and The Guest.

Shades of normality return this week as James and Dave once again take the plunge into the glorious world of cinema and fiction. This week they coin the term Science-Faction as they review the epic festival darling "First Man".  David riffs on Metallica ticket price tags whilst James finally gets to talk about his least favourite human being (debatable) Piers Morgan and again talks about giants with a taste for human flesh. In addition, reviewed this week are Hotel Artemis, I Daniel Blake and Black Mass.  As the iconic Wallace once said (eating the moon) "It's like no Cheese I ever tasted..!"

Apologies from the outset. This is a needlessly and horrendously drunk episode coming directly from Leicester Square. Main review is of course the moving A Star is Born. David finally sacks off his x-files watch-a-thon, a bottle of Jamesons is drunk and Conor McGregor is laid into for being the over-hyped racist that he is. Also reviewed are Where the Wind Blows and Blue Velvet and loads of computer games for no reason. Like Prince Harry always says....."Get out of my way you fucking you god damn pig farmer"

James-upon-David review the new Netflix original Hold the Dark with mixed emotions. They talk about the oversaturation of streaming tv shows, the wage strikes of Wetherspoons and Paddington Bear being a mad bastard! Also reviewed are The Lives of Others and obvs, Paddington 2. Like Paddington always say....'gimme a marmalade sandwich for me tea you fucking mad lad!'

Davey and Jamey review the excellent Leave No Trace. Brie Larson is not allowed to frown, Boyd Hilton is not an authority on film and the Vietnam War is not a laughing matter. Also reviewed are The Girl with all the Gifts and The Cove. Reviewing films with PTSD, dolphin genocide and terrible child actors produces a very sombre pod. Forgive us.

Hello film lovers. This week James and Dave review the beautiful new movie Cold War. Multicultural London gets the loving, a concerned drunk man gets the hating and in a bizarre turn of events we get to speak to a living, breathing racist. Also reviewed are Paddington and Tucker & Dave vs Evil. If you don't like racism please listen to this. If you do like racism please insert your fingers into a toaster.

David and his monumentally hungover friend James review the new, absolutely diabolical, Predator film. David talks in depth about a certain Billboard advertisement he sees daily whilst James reflects on crimes against nature and film-making, plus all the (un)usual podcast banter. Also reviewed are "Cablibre" and Hannah Gadsby's, thought provoking,"Nanette". As the graceful Audrey Hepburn once said " Eat shit and die punk!"

Isle of Skye special! Dave and James host this week's podcast from the beautiful Scottish isles where they are shooting footage for their short film We Progress. As they become increasingly refreshed at the pub they review the new Ethan Hawke indy First Reformed as well as chatting complete bollocks on everything from chauvinistic Italian pricks to the Vietnam War. Also reviewed are Pollise and Into the Inferno. In the wise words of Ho Chi Minh 'As when the structure of the modern world collapses around us always slap the daft cunt that did it'.

Shiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit! Another cracking podcast episode from James and David. They review the new Spike Lee joint Blackkklansman, and reminisce over the awkward as fuck circumstances they were watching it in. Gywneth Paltrow gets her long due comeuppance for being an absolute tool, Damien Chazelle gets the love even though he has that godawful goatee and David is set an 18 hour Vietnam War documentary marathon. Also reviewed are the recent great comedies Game Night and Ingrid Goes West. We'll leave you with the famous quote from George Lucas regarding his Star Wars prequels. "There was a time when i enjoyed making movies but now i set fire to turds in front of a green screen and laugh when people pay to see it".

Hello film fanatics. This week James and David review the Rachel Weisz/Mcadams indy drama Disobedience. Disney gets yet another trouncing, as does The Big Bang Theory, James Bond, Han Solo, Netflix and a round dodging best mate. There's a light bit of poetry and finally some well deserved for Jeremy Renner. Also reviewed Wind River and The last of the Mohicans. This podcast is quite simply brilliant.

Good day film freaks. This week James and Dave review shit shark film The Meg. There's high drama chats about the state of the new ratings friendly decisions for The Oscars, intense swearing directed towards Hulk Hogan and some interesting thoughts on the house of the mouse Disney. Also reviewed are God's own Country, The First Girl I Loved and for no reason a 10 second review of Mission Impossible 2. In the words Spielberg as famously quoted at the premiere of The Meg.....'Hahahahahahahah......fucking wet cu....*burp*'