Self-Care for Survivors of Trauma

Do you think you're controlling? Most people don't. We generally think of a angry, domestically violent-type person who takes their partners phone and stops them from seeing their friends. But what if I showed you that being controlling is actually a very covert form of manipulation that you might be doing in relationships without even meaning to?!Today I give three uncommon signs that you might have an issue with control, which is actually a sign of codepenency. If you're willing to listen to this, then YOU are DOING THE WORK! Congratulations on your self-awareness!!!  Healing is possible! I'd love to hear from you! https://www.instagram.com/iheartserin/Please rate and review the podcast to let me know you're listening! Thank you!

Have you noticed the critical voice inside your head? If you are in recovery or are interested in learning more about self-love and self care, this episode is for you. I know there was a time in my life when I was in such denial about my mental health that I didn't even notice the horrid things my critical voice was constantly shouting at me. Those messages had become such commonplace occurences that I had ignored them. But they were still there, behind the scenes, adding to my self-hatred and low self-esteem. Today I will show you how to identify that critical voice, sometimes called our "critical parent." Where do these voices come from? Are they from childhood? I will also give you the tools to combat that critical voice and start setting boundaries for more self-love and acceptance within your own body!  Healing is possible! I'd love to hear from you! https://www.instagram.com/iheartserin/Please rate and review the podcast to let me know you're listening! Thank you!

Today I share a short poem I wrote that summarizes my journey from self-loathing to self-love. I hope it inspires you to follow your creativity! Spending our time in creative mode activates the pump that gushes self-love and acceptance!  Healing is possible! I'd love to hear from you! https://www.instagram.com/iheartserin/Please rate and review the podcast to let me know you're listening! Thank you!

Our energy sets our boundaries! This means that boundaries are mostly an inside job. You might not need to even tell the other person with words that you are setting a boundary! We've all been around people who have strong boundaries. They hold the truth inside of them and we know even before talking to them that they won't put up with BS! We can become that type of person if we take the time to sit, listen to our resentments and feelings, and tease out the exact thing that's bugging us. If we do that, the truth emerges and we are able to then proceed with the boundary a lot more smoothly. We also can take time to talk with a neutral friend about the boundary and practice saying as few words as possible to convey our message. We don't need to explain the boundary if we know our own truth within and can validate it for ourselves. Good luck boundary setting with grace! Let me know how it goes.  Healing is possible! I'd love to hear from you! https://www.instagram.com/iheartserin/Please rate and review the podcast to let me know you're listening! Thank you!

I share an exercise you can do for free with a pen and a piece of paper to tap into the wisdom of your intuition/inner child. One time I got an amazingly intuitive hit with this exercise and it helped me understand the truth about my abusive partner. I mention Martha Beck. Here's one of her wonderful podcasts that you might enjoy: https://omny.fm/shows/the-gathering-pod/the-magical-corner-of-intention-and-invention Healing is possible! I'd love to hear from you! https://www.instagram.com/iheartserin/Please rate and review the podcast to let me know you're listening! Thank you!

Pure. Fucking. Magic. PFM. What was happening in your life when you experienced it? I liken it to the feeling of the universe delivering in such a way that you could have never planned or expected. It's pure magic. I share two examples of recent PFM in my life, but there are so many! When have you witnessed PFM? DM me on Instagram @iheartserin Healing is possible! I'd love to hear from you! https://www.instagram.com/iheartserin/Please rate and review the podcast to let me know you're listening! Thank you!

Do you stay quiet when injustices occur? Or do you voice your concerns in a graceful manner? Today I share a story about how I stood up for my values by writing an email to my son's school. A shocking thing occured while my son was having freetime, and I wanted to make sure it didn't happen again. I know I can't solve the problems of the world, but maybe I can make better the little corner of the city I live in... maybe I can protect one other child from being porn-exposed at a young age. I recorded this podcast before I had heard a response from the teachers I emailed. I wanted to be sure that my feelings were raw and real as I recorded it. I had so many fears before I clicked that "send" button and stuck my neck out! I was so fearful of being judged, blamed, or just ignored! Luckily, I can tell you now, I was listened to and action was taken to stop this from happening again! My little email caused a GREAT DEAL of change. I alerted the school about problems I don't think they even knew existed at the elementary level. Grace + Boundaries works! Keep an even keel to break that cycle!!  Healing is possible! I'd love to hear from you! https://www.instagram.com/iheartserin/Please rate and review the podcast to let me know you're listening! Thank you!

Have you ever wondered if you were a narcissist? I sure have. When I started learning about Narcissism and Codependency back in 2015, I was confused about the difference between these two ideas. It seemed they overlapped in places that made me scared- could I be just as bad as the person I was pointing fingers at? The short answer is: NO. Narcissism is intense and serious. It is not the same thing as being a jerk, or being self-centered. All humans are celf-centered a lot of the time, but that doesn't make us narcissistic. True narcissism is when a person has no sense of self and has to deflect all blame towards others because they are unable to self-reflecft or feel empathy. Let's start reclamining the severity of the true word narcissism and stop using synonymously with all negative character traits. Public Service Soap-box announcement! ;-) Thanks for listening! I hope it helps you on your journey!  Healing is possible! I'd love to hear from you! https://www.instagram.com/iheartserin/Please rate and review the podcast to let me know you're listening! Thank you!

Do you ever gaslight yourself when you think of the narcissistic person in your life? Do you wonder if it's your fault, if they're right, if everyone else is more sane than you because you see the bad behavior and they don't? I've been dealing with real gaslighting from narcissists and people in my life for many years. But I've recently realized how I was doing it to myself! This week I had a lot of anger and after consulting with a friend, decided to do a meditation to help release some of it. I came across this wonderful meditation by Amy Lowery on Insight Timer: https://insig.ht/wSLC3oMRpHbI share about what helped me release my anger. Then, when the veil of anger was lifted, what I found behind it was a truth that I know deep in my bones. This will help you if you've ever suffered from narcissistic abuse. My favorite expert on narcissism: Dr. Ramani Durvasula with a book ("It's Not You") and a podcast ("Navigating Narcissism"), both INCREDIBLE. I also read a book recently by a therapist about narcissistic abuse recovery: Ingrid Clayton's "Believing Me." https://www.amazon.com/Believing-Me-Healing-Narcissistic-Complex/dp/B0BCSCYRLB/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&dib_tag=se&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.PJDSHzhZ8WZbjLV12WtrttisvMiVRXpfyI7hs-eoQZuIvpnytQos3s9XEKVXul5qIpml0fcO2jd6sBxg9mdGj6L6E56NqOtX0uM3wUwP6oqAuCxQREXt9to8ltLeNuLgGfDMuNOZX6KvbrYvwP9y8g.z8SXIRvLY905d-O4t2WaARadWfPr7b4an9sTVSRWkks&qid=1708668278&sr=8-1I hope these help you on your journey while you navigate intergenerational trauma!  Healing is possible! I'd love to hear from you! https://www.instagram.com/iheartserin/Please rate and review the podcast to let me know you're listening! Thank you!

I listened to a popular male podcaster recently say that we should never mention our ex or our trauma when dating. I disagree. What do you think? While I think the idea of trying to have a fun, light, time while dating is a good rule of thumb, I disagree that I should stop myself from sharing anything serious. My goal in dating is not just to have fun. It's to be my authentic self so that I can tell quickly if the person I'm with actually likes me for ME rather than just the absolute shiniest version of myself. I discuss why I think it's important to stay honest, even on a first date. A brief mentioning of tiny pieces of our past, especially if asked, is not going to make or break a date with the right person. I also share about why I'm proud of overcoming my past and that trying to not mention something purposefully feels shaming to me. Anyone who I would want to be with and who would end up loving me is going to be someone who can handle truth and wants to seek out truth. Truth doesn't need to go as far as creating a trauma-bond. It's essential to a healthy, loving relationship, even from the first moments of meeting. Thanks for listening!  Healing is possible! I'd love to hear from you! https://www.instagram.com/iheartserin/Please rate and review the podcast to let me know you're listening! Thank you!

Rewind from 2022 that I thought you might enjoy! I hope it keeps you from making the mistakes I made! How do we know when we are feeling desperate and should take extra precautions while we date? How can we tell if we have low self-worth? Sometimes it's hard to see these things until they're in the rearview.I share three ways you can tell if you're a little desperate or have  low self-esteem when dating. I tell a story of a dating relationship I had in 2020 during the pandemic. I was a leetle more desperate for attention and affection than I knew back then.All relationships are here to help us learn and grow. That's why I'm sharing these honest stories with you all. Maybe hearing my experience can help others say no and start to react when they are treated less than they deserve.I mention the helpful book The Verbally Abusive Relationship by Patricia Evans. I recommend. https://www.amazon.com/Verbally-Abusive-Relationship-Expanded-Third/dp/1440504636Thank you for listening!  Healing is possible! I'd love to hear from you! https://www.instagram.com/iheartserin/Please rate and review the podcast to let me know you're listening! Thank you!

Rewind: I'm re-releasing this episode from 2022 because I hope others can learn from my bad mistakes. Trigger Warning! I mildly discuss a date-rape situation in this episode. No major details, just feelings and thoughts about the situation. My third installment in the "Dating Deathtrap" series is about my second relationship after my divorce, which is more than super-cringy. What happened with this man I dated was what plunged me into truly taking therapy and my immediate need for healing seriously. It led me to finding a new therapist who specializes in EMDR. Jumping to conclusions about someone we're dating is a "deathtrap" because on the positive side or the negative side, we're not living in reality. This causes problems and it's a recipe for a dating disaster. I learned from this relationship that even if someone seems like a great person and checks a bunch of boxes on my list of qualities I want in a partner, I need to take my time and pay attention.  He could still be a psycho-boundary violator. It's in those more subtle moments that we get to know another person, not necessarily in the big things. Thank you for listening! What's a dating deathtrap for you? Episode 41: Dating Deathtrap #1: Believing Words Over Actions: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/grace-boundaries-navigating-intergenerational-trauma/id1597600839?i=1000578487781Episode 67: Dating Deathtrap #7: Clamming Up: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/grace-boundaries-navigating-intergenerational-trauma/id1597600839?i=1000603234643 Healing is possible! I'd love to hear from you! https://www.instagram.com/iheartserin/Please rate and review the podcast to let me know you're listening! Thank you!

How has Intergenerational Trauma affected your dating life? I share five ways that facing my intergenerational trauma has affected mine. I share a little of my story that pushed me to become aware of these patterns and what we can do to move forward towards becoming a healthy partner that attracts someone great! Have a wonderful Valentine's Day- do something nice for yourself! I will be treating myself to a massage, chocolate, and yoga. ;-) Please go back and listen to episodes #40-48, which deal with dating as a dipstick to recovery and numerate my many dating mistakes so that you don't have to relive them! :-) -ErinEpisode 41: Dating Deathtrap #1: Believing Words Over Actions: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/grace-boundaries-navigating-intergenerational-trauma/id1597600839?i=1000578487781Episode 67: Dating Deathtrap #7: Clamming Up: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/grace-boundaries-navigating-intergenerational-trauma/id1597600839?i=1000603234643 Healing is possible! I'd love to hear from you! https://www.instagram.com/iheartserin/Please rate and review the podcast to let me know you're listening! Thank you!

Erin Vandermore, Licenced Therapist, Wellness Coach, and Author, wants us to take our healing seriously! She says that if the body says it's trauma, it's trauma! We don't have to waste time defining what that exactly means. (Big T Trauma? Little t trauma?)Erin and I talk about creating boundaries between work life, creative life, and home life. We also dicsuss boundaries with our children- is it okay to say no to playing Fortnite? Erin is developing an app that will help increase our mental health with bilateral stimulation and positive affirmations. She sees EMDR as a way to "jump-start" the good juju in our nervous system. You can find Erin's journals and books on Amazon.com. Website: https://ageofuncertaintycoaching.com/ Healing is possible! I'd love to hear from you! https://www.instagram.com/iheartserin/Please rate and review the podcast to let me know you're listening! Thank you!

As a single parent, have you ever felt like you're seen as a reject, or as if you're wearing a scarlet letter?  Shoshana Alexandra is here today to help reframe that outdated stigma that I have felt as a single parent, and maybe you have, too. Shoshana Alexandra wrote a book called "In Praise of Single Parents: Mothers and Fathers Embracing the Challenge." It's become a place of refuge for me as I learn how to feel connected in a society that still professes the need for the nuclear family model (which is actually very unnatural according to anthropological research!) What we do need is to "expand the family!" Shoshana created a rich community surrounding her son, who had 13 Godparents that helped raise him! They are still in his life to support and guide him when he needs it. Shoshana and I discuss the dysfunction in our relationships that led to us becoming single parents, the idea of "double parenting," how to vet and find a supportive community, and how to embrace the joy that is already present in your parenting- albeit alone or with many supportive friends and chosen family. Shoshana truly reframes what it means to be a single parents. Aren't we so lucky to have these wonderful beings in our lives? I know I am.  http://shoshanaalexander.comShoshana's "Answer the Call" workshop: https://www.shoshanaalexander.com/answer-the-call/Shoshana Alexander, MA, is an author, teacher, developmental editor, playwright, actor, and mother, and has in all these ways tried to make a positive difference for the Earth. She lives on the unceded territory of the Takelma, Latgawa, and Shasta people. She is the author of several books, including In Praise of Single Parents and Women's Ventures/Women's Visions, and is co-author of Awakening Joy with James Baraz. Shoshana has guided numerous books into print in the areas of Buddhism, psychology, and spirituality, includingThe Findhorn Garden, Radical Acceptance (Tara Brach), Faith and LovingKindness (Sharon Salzberg), and Bouncing Back (Linda Graham). She has a master's degree in psychology and theatre, and has taught high school and university courses in the humanities. She has led support groups for those grieving loss and facilitated longterm writing groups for those developing the craft of writing books. Her creative endeavors in live performance include spoken-word poetry with music, and writing and acting in a full-length play, “Taking Our Life,” exploring suicide, ecocide and humanity's imperative to choose life. She stood with Earth Protectors at Standing Rock, and her many decades of participation in self-development and spiritual disciplines have included extensive mindfulness meditation practices, and she has been authorized as a dharma teacher. Her work arises from a passion to understand life, honor the Earth, and engage the magic and power of wisdom, words and music to heal and transform.  shoshanaalexander.com Healing is possible! I'd love to hear from you! https://www.instagram.com/iheartserin/Please rate and review the podcast to let me know you're listening! Thank you!

Today is part 2 of a 2 part discussion surrounding breathwork and intergenerational trauma that starts in the womb! Susan Tuttle, author and breathwork practitioner with 30 years of codependency recovery, is back! Her first Episode, "How do we Learn to Love Our Bodies?" #66, is one of my most-downloaded episodes ever.We start off by discussing how our birth stories and birth trauma have shaped our lives. Our first moments of life trained our brains  to use some of the coping mechanisms that helped us survive, but are now stopping us from embodying the healthy lifestyle that we crave.  Susan shares a miraculous story about her time last summer being trained as a breathwork practitioner in Costa Rica. She believes that breathwork allows for the waves to part and the truth to come to the surface. This leads to the ability to forgive and better understand our beginnings here on this Earth. Want a free consultation with Susan? Her website is: https://www.susanmtuttle.com/or, you can email her directly at info@susanmtuttle.comSusan's book can be found on Amazon.com or bn.com:  https://www.amazon.com/Secret-Dreamworld-Andrea-Cooper-Journey/dp/B0CK9ZFR2P/ref=sr_1_1?crid=31CMZLJ6270QO&keywords=susan+m+tuttle&qid=1704597256&sprefix=susan+m+%2Caps%2C771&sr=8-1 Healing is possible! I'd love to hear from you! https://www.instagram.com/iheartserin/Please rate and review the podcast to let me know you're listening! Thank you!

Susan Tuttle, author and breathwork practitioner with 30 years of codependency recovery, is back! The first time she was on the podcast (#66) was one of my most-downloaded episodes ever. Today is part 1 of a 2 part discussion surrounding intergernational trauma. We discuss how generational trauma manifests in our lives- what does it look like? How does it show up? How can we recognize our need for codependency recovery or take seriously how many substances we are putting into our bodies? Susan tells a portion of a story of her own life when she realized "I have to stop pointing fingers at others. I need to look at myself. " What a great message for the new year! Enjoy! Want a free consultation with Susan? Her website is: https://www.susanmtuttle.com/or, you can email her directly at info@susanmtuttle.comSusan's book can be found on Amazon.com or bn.com:  https://www.amazon.com/Secret-Dreamworld-Andrea-Cooper-Journey/dp/B0CK9ZFR2P/ref=sr_1_1?crid=31CMZLJ6270QO&keywords=susan+m+tuttle&qid=1704597256&sprefix=susan+m+%2Caps%2C771&sr=8-1 Healing is possible! I'd love to hear from you! https://www.instagram.com/iheartserin/Please rate and review the podcast to let me know you're listening! Thank you!

How are you at setting boundaries? What is the practice that you follow? The questions that you check yourself with before you make the call? I share my process today of boundary setting. I tell a story about a boundary conversation I had with my dad this week, which was unconfortable, but it taught me something important. I'm staying curious and keeping an open heart towards learning how to be a great communicator in those relationships where emotional intimacy is possible. It's not possible with everyone, so if you get to be part of it, boundary setting can become relationship GOLD!  Healing is possible! I'd love to hear from you! https://www.instagram.com/iheartserin/Please rate and review the podcast to let me know you're listening! Thank you!

Do you allow others to be hot and cold with you in relationships? I've noticed that I'm attracted to that energy, since it mirrors my treatment in my family of origin. I share a story about how I overcame that attraction by observing my own ambivalence. I also share a Christmas miracle about setting boundaries with family that you won't want to miss! I hope it inspires you to keep on truckin' on your own boundary=setting journey! I reference the Mark Groves Podcast "How to Show Up, Even if You're Afraid" https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-mark-groves-podcast/id1282044290?i=1000639852713and an episode of this podcast where i talk about the healing work I did surrounding my relationship with my mom. https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/grace-boundaries-navigating-intergenerational-trauma/id1597600839?i=1000634539057 and the Mother Wound: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/grace-boundaries-navigating-intergenerational-trauma/id1597600839?i=1000621561533 Healing is possible! I'd love to hear from you! https://www.instagram.com/iheartserin/Please rate and review the podcast to let me know you're listening! Thank you!

Our culture and media markets that behavior change is direct. For example, if you want to lose weight, then you should diet to eat less. As many of us know from trying this multiple times in our lives, IT DOESN'T WORK for lasting behavior change! Behavior change is actually INDIRECT. The only way out of these patterns is deep, internal work. I give an example  of what my therapist taught me about this topic and how I'm practicing these new skills to use in everyday life.  Healing is possible! I'd love to hear from you! https://www.instagram.com/iheartserin/Please rate and review the podcast to let me know you're listening! Thank you!

I sometimes feel shamed by others for my desire for a loving partnership. Do you ever feel this stigma around town? Has anyone ever pointedly asking you WHY you want a romantic relationship, as if there's sometihng wrong with you for wanting love? I share some examples of when it's felt like people have thrown shade my way for wanting a romanric relationship.  I wholeheartedly disagree because "Karma is my boyfriend!" (TS)There's nothing wrong with my desire to love and be loved! This is such a deeply human yearning. Heck my cats even want to curl up next to me when they sleep- we see this craving for warmth all over the animal kingdom. I share a quote from The Holistic Psychologist on Instagram about healthy, loving marriages.  Healing is possible! I'd love to hear from you! https://www.instagram.com/iheartserin/Please rate and review the podcast to let me know you're listening! Thank you!

Have you ever pondered the word "unmanageable" as a description of the type of life you lead? It's rich food for thought and that's what I'm telling a story about today. I also give a list of signs you are experiencing unmanageability and need to slow down for some self-care. Let me know what you think!

Have you ever heard that money is linked to childhood trauma? This is true ! My guest, Nadine Zumot, specializes in helping clients heal their money wounds on the daily! We discuss how money wounds manifest in our lives, how to know if we have money trauma, and what to do about it if we need help. You can find Nadine at https://www.saveamillioncents.com/She hosts the podcast The Money Healing Podcast and you can find her on Instagram @nadinezumot Healing is possible! I'd love to hear from you! https://www.instagram.com/iheartserin/Please rate and review the podcast to let me know you're listening! Thank you!

Jana Wilson is an emotional healing educator who teaches meditation and hypnotherapy as part of her Emotional Healing System.  She just published her first book, a perscriptive memoir called, Wise Little One: Learning to Love and Listen to my Inner Child this past July. Jana and I discuss all things trauma- lives of parents, life as a little one, date rape, divorce, CPTSD, among lots of other wise tidbits of healing. Jana believes that "awareness is the greatest agent of change," She discusses the idea that we attract ourselves in romantic relationships and that we can't get what we are not yet- financially responsible, emotionally intelligent, etc. It has to come within ourselves first to be able to attract that from another. You can find Jana on her website: https://www.janawilson.com/ Healing is possible! I'd love to hear from you! https://www.instagram.com/iheartserin/Please rate and review the podcast to let me know you're listening! Thank you! Join the facebook group: Survivors of Trauma Unite! https://www.facebook.com/groups/925184671535182

Mark Wolynn told me, "The Partner is the Mother," and it's one of the most profound sentences I've heard this year. Does this assertion track for you in your significant relationship? It sure does for me when I look back at my past partners. It was difficult to pinpoint at first, but now I see the similarities between the two and I know I have a large mother wound that I'm seeking to heal. Today I discuss more about that quote and what it means in my life. I share what Mark Wolynn advised me to do to heal the wound, and my reaction to his words. I share a poignant meditation I did recently that revealed a shocking symbolic image that I'm still unpacking. It's embarassing, but I'm hoping someone out there can relate! Textbook codependency. (It's how I coped with my emotional neglect as a child, so I don't blame myself!)Finally, I top off the deep chat with a new practice I've been trying out that I learned from none other than one of my favorite memoirists, Elizabeth Gilbert, of Eat, Pray, Love fame. If you haven't read that one, go get it now! You're in for a whilrwind romance with a book and a soulful goddess.  You can find Mark Wolynn at: https://markwolynn.com/and Liz Gilbert at: https://elizabethgilbert.substack.com/ Healing is possible! I'd love to hear from you! https://www.instagram.com/iheartserin/Please rate and review the podcast to let me know you're listening! Thank you! Join the facebook group: Survivors of Trauma Unite! https://www.facebook.com/groups/925184671535182

When is the right time in childhood to bring up the topic of sex? The answer is pretty much from when they can talk! Listening to Amy Lang's podcast "Just Say This" has taught me so much about how to be open with my son about his body, his feelings, and his sexual health. It's helped me learn how to take the shame out of sexuality so that I can keep the lines of communication open with him as he grows up. We discuss sexual abuse prevention, pornography exposure, why it's important to teach your kids the scientific names for their parts, and she shares some great books that can help kids learn more.  Just Say This" Podcast Link: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/talking-with-neurodiverse-kids-about-masturbation-and/id1440215158?i=1000631727283Amy Lang is a sexual health educator who has 25 years of experience helping individuals, families, and PTA's move forward in the discussion surrounding sex education. She offers many trainings on her website including a sexual abuse prevention training and a free script sharing "7 Great Tips" for sex talks with kids. https://birdsandbeesandkids.com/free-tips/ Healing is possible! I'd love to hear from you! https://www.instagram.com/iheartserin/Please rate and review the podcast to let me know you're listening! Thank you! Join the facebook group: Survivors of Trauma Unite! https://www.facebook.com/groups/925184671535182

Re-Release: My first episode describing Emotional Self-Care(New episodes starting next week!)Many of you have probably listened to this episode, because it's the most downloaded, being my first and all. My podcast started as "Self-Care for Survivors of Trauma" in November,  2021. Since then I've shared a lot about what self-care means to me.  I take breaks at work to take deep breaths in the sun. I eat as healthy as I can. I get exercise, and monitor my water intake. Mostly, I take time to journal, feel my feelings, and listen to those parts of me that have a lot things to say! I used to ignore them, but now I know they are screaming to be heard. Let me know what you think. Thanks for listening!  Healing is possible! I'd love to hear from you! https://www.instagram.com/iheartserin/Please rate and review the podcast to let me know you're listening! Thank you! Join the facebook group: Survivors of Trauma Unite! https://www.facebook.com/groups/925184671535182

Re-Release: This is my rawest, most truthful episode. I have contemplated deleting it a few times, but I feel it's an important validation for others going through this similar, taboo, subject. Listen if you are someone who has a difficult relationship with your mom. Let me know what you think.  Healing is possible! I'd love to hear from you! https://www.instagram.com/iheartserin/Please rate and review the podcast to let me know you're listening! Thank you! Join the facebook group: Survivors of Trauma Unite! https://www.facebook.com/groups/925184671535182

Re-Release! My most-dowloaded episode!Enjoy!Have you experienced emotional abuse? I sure have, and it can be really tricky to detect. It took me a lot of reading, rewiring my brain with therapy, and coming out of denial to be able to recognize emotional abuse. I share a story today about a time I felt icky in my love relationship. I unpack what went on there and validate what was being said and done invisibly.  Healing is possible! I'd love to hear from you! https://www.instagram.com/iheartserin/Please rate and review the podcast to let me know you're listening! Thank you! Join the facebook group: Survivors of Trauma Unite! https://www.facebook.com/groups/925184671535182

Re-Release! My first, and most-downloaded interview!I'm proud to share with you this conversation between me and my wise friend, Susan Tuttle, who is close to publishing her first book in November, 20223! Susan is a life coach and teacher of all things recovery. She  shares valuable advice about her journey to find balance in her life and to learn how to stop self-abandoning. We speak about breathwork, body image, and how to respect and acknowledge our bodies for the miraculous systems that they are. If you'd like to get in contact with Susan or have her as your life coach, DM me and I will get you two connected. Thank you for listening! Healing is possible!I'd love to hear from you! https://www.instagram.com/iheartserin/Please rate and review the podcast to let me know you're listening! Thank you!Join the facebook group: Survivors of Trauma Unite!https://www.facebook.com/groups/925184671535182 Healing is possible! I'd love to hear from you! https://www.instagram.com/iheartserin/Please rate and review the podcast to let me know you're listening! Thank you! Join the facebook group: Survivors of Trauma Unite! https://www.facebook.com/groups/925184671535182

~Re-released popular episode from 2022~Do you believe that the emotional injuries you suffered in childhood stick with you until they are processed?  Or do you think we can just "keep them in the past" and deny they exist? I know from experience that I'm not able to sweep what happened to me as a child under the rug. I've been suffering from a lot of insomnia related to my perfectionism and workaholism. My brain wants to wake up in the middle of the night and fight fires. The "fires" are my brain's perception of mistakes I've made throughout the day and things I should do better next time. This stems from a deep fear I have of messing up and then getting yelled at or shamed for how I'm never good enough. I unconsciously believe that if I'm not perfect, I will get in trouble with authority figures, or maybe, die. It's that serious in my body. This is directly connected to the verbal abuse my parents inflicted on me in my childhood. So, how do I deal with that now? I share a pathway I've found- using EMDR and Family Systems therapy. I discuss how to comfort that inner child who's so worried she's not doing it right. I hope to reintegrate that fearful part of me into my adult self so that I can (literally) sleep better at night! Thank you for listening! Healing is possible!I'd love to hear from you! https://www.instagram.com/iheartserin/Please rate and review the podcast to let me know you're listening! Thank you!Join the facebook group: Survivors of Trauma Unite!https://www.facebook.com/groups/925184671535182 Healing is possible! I'd love to hear from you! https://www.instagram.com/iheartserin/Please rate and review the podcast to let me know you're listening! Thank you! Join the facebook group: Survivors of Trauma Unite! https://www.facebook.com/groups/925184671535182

I have three interviews schedule for the month of October- a memoirist, a trauma-informed money coach, and a sex therapist that can help us navigate difficult conversations with our children surrounding sex and our bodies. Those interviews will be coming soon! Please rate and review my podcast to help me know you are listening and enjoying it! Here are some past episodes that you might enjoy:What's emotional self-care? https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/grace-boundaries-navigating-intergenerational-trauma/id1597600839?i=1000543252887Emotional Abuse Validation: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/grace-boundaries-navigating-intergenerational-trauma/id1597600839?i=1000544672391Dating Deathtrap https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/grace-boundaries-navigating-intergenerational-trauma/id1597600839?i=1000579278484 Healing is possible! I'd love to hear from you! https://www.instagram.com/iheartserin/Please rate and review the podcast to let me know you're listening! Thank you! Join the facebook group: Survivors of Trauma Unite! https://www.facebook.com/groups/925184671535182

I'm celebrating my 100th episode this week!!!!!!! I thought long and hard about how to make it extra special. I decided to invite someone I look up to, someone who is always curious and interested in new things... someone who loves me... my DAD! We philosiphize about two of my dad's favorite things: football and mathematics.Listen to hear why learning math is important for every person, how punishments have shifted since my dad was a boy in 1950's Wisconsin, and why football is a metaphor for life. Then, you might even want to stay for the two corny math jokes at the end. Even if you roll your eyes, it will bring back memories of your favorite high school teacher that had passion for his subject. I hope you enjoy it. Thanks for listening! Please leave me a review if you love this podcast so I know you're listening.  Healing is possible! You can join my free monthly Ambitious Women's Goal seeting group for support and encouragement towards whatever life goals you're reaching. Find me on Instagram or DM me to learn the details. I'd love to hear from you! https://www.instagram.com/iheartserin/Please rate and review the podcast to let me know you're listening! Thank you! Join the facebook group: Survivors of Trauma Unite! https://www.facebook.com/groups/925184671535182

What do we do after we put our foot in our mouth, or overreact to something someone says? Do we bury our heads in the sand and pretend it never happened? Do we just wish it away and lie to ourselves that it was really no big deal? No! We REPAIR. I love this concept of repair being part of intimacy in relationships. We are flawed humans, so we will always do things to hurt others unintentionally in relationships. I share two stories about how my friends and I repaired after some poor communication. Here's Dr. Becky Kennedy's podcast on repair with Cheryl Strayed! https://podcasts.apple.com/ca/podcast/the-one-with-cheryl-strayed-on-repair/id1561689671?i=1000627558864TED talk on Repair with Dr. Becky: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PHpPtdk9rco Healing is possible! You can join my free monthly Ambitious Women's Goal seeting group for support and encouragement towards whatever life goals you're reaching. Find me on Instagram or DM me to learn the details. I'd love to hear from you! https://www.instagram.com/iheartserin/Please rate and review the podcast to let me know you're listening! Thank you! Join the facebook group: Survivors of Trauma Unite! https://www.facebook.com/groups/925184671535182

Did you have an abuser from your childhood that you haven't seen in many years? I did, and I ran into them a few weeks ago. NOT  a fun experience. I went into a fawning response and took their lead, acting like everything was cool. Inside, I was wanting to gag or yell out in anger, or shake them like, how can you act like this is normal for us to be talking right now?!?!? I share my thoughts about how to deal with abusers from the past, and make the connection between what happened to me then and how it has impacted my life today.  Healing is possible! You can join my free monthly Ambitious Women's Goal seeting group for support and encouragement towards whatever life goals you're reaching. Find me on Instagram or DM me to learn the details. I'd love to hear from you! https://www.instagram.com/iheartserin/Please rate and review the podcast to let me know you're listening! Thank you! Join the facebook group: Survivors of Trauma Unite! https://www.facebook.com/groups/925184671535182

Do you have the belief that following your dreams, making more money, or getting that dream house/car/job you have always wanted will be extremely difficult to accomplish? I used to, as well. I'm here to tell you today that you can prime your brain for abundance by creating a morning routine for yourself and changing your thought patterns. I've trained my brain to move from those negative, defeating thoughts, towards recognizing when I'm having them and hitting the reset button. This has made a huge difference in the amout of synchronicity that shows up in my life today. So many things have changed for the better ever since I've opened up to the endless, unfathomable possibilities the universe has to offer ever one of us. Listen to these three resources to help you move forward towards reaching your desires. Best of luck! Here's an Insight Time meditation to remind you that "Things Can Be Easy."https://insig.ht/4As33wZTPCb Here's an interview that rocked my world with Joe Dispenza and Lewis Howes: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-school-of-greatness/id596047499?i=1000626666518Here's an episode of the Cathy Heller Show- choose one that speaks to you, or this one was good (so many are great!)https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/dont-keep-your-day-job/id1191831035?i=1000530016349 Healing is possible! You can join my free monthly Ambitious Women's Goal seeting group for support and encouragement towards whatever life goals you're reaching. Find me on Instagram or DM me to learn the details. I'd love to hear from you! https://www.instagram.com/iheartserin/Please rate and review the podcast to let me know you're listening! Thank you! Join the facebook group: Survivors of Trauma Unite! https://www.facebook.com/groups/925184671535182

"Abundance is not something we acquire. It is something we tune into." -Dr. Wayne DyerDo you have an abundance mindset? Are you open to receiving... Love?  Energy?  Time? Attention? Money? At times I've been too much of a giver to the point where eventually, it made me resentful. The other bad part about giving codependently is that it closes us off to receiving gifts from others. We actually feel UNCOMFORTABLE receiving recognition, praise, gifts, attention, etc. Have you ever felt that way? I share a story today about how I opened up myself to receive what others were offering, and how much richer and fuller my summer vacation became when I was willing to put down my fear and take that leap of faith into receiving from the universe. It feels so good. I want that for you, too! Thanks for listening!   Healing is possible! You can join my free monthly Ambitious Women's Goal seeting group for support and encouragement towards whatever life goals you're reaching. Find me on Instagram or DM me to learn the details. I'd love to hear from you! https://www.instagram.com/iheartserin/Please rate and review the podcast to let me know you're listening! Thank you! Join the facebook group: Survivors of Trauma Unite! https://www.facebook.com/groups/925184671535182

MY FAVORITE EPISODE YET!!! I think you'll really love this one, if you're fascinated by intergenerational trauma! I'm super pumped to share my interview with author and breathwork practicioner Melissa Pennel of "Questions You'll Wish You Asked Yourself." After losing her parents and grandparents at a young age and getting sober before college, Melissa walked a path of recovery and self-reflection that led her to study psychology and to write a series of interactive journals that started with "Questions You'll Wish you Asked: A Time Capsule Journal for Mothers and Daughters." (Link below) Melissa and I share a deep conversation about how things that happened in the past impact our lives today. "Our issues are in our tissues," as they say! We discuss the mother/daughter/grandmother relationship at length, and Melissa delicately verbalizes how excatly to ask uncomfortable questions and glean answers that will allow us to live our best lives in the present. Melissa's website: https://www.followyourfirecoaching.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/followingfire/Link to Melissa's book: https://www.amazon.com/Questions-Youll-Wish-You-Asked/dp/1736009508/ref=sr_1_1?crid=1QQMTO7Q9BVMJ&keywords=Questions+you%27ll+wish+you+asked+mom&qid=1692561328&s=books&sprefix=questions+you%27ll+wish+you+asked+mom%2Cstripbooks%2C184&sr=1-1 Healing is possible! You can join my free monthly Ambitious Women's Goal seeting group for support and encouragement towards whatever life goals you're reaching. Find me on Instagram or DM me to learn the details. I'd love to hear from you! https://www.instagram.com/iheartserin/Please rate and review the podcast to let me know you're listening! Thank you! Join the facebook group: Survivors of Trauma Unite! https://www.facebook.com/groups/925184671535182

Have you found a great therapist for your child? For me, it was a long rode to find a trauma informed therapist that understood my son and I. It was tricky to figure out what exactly my son needed and what I needed to feel safe, heard, and understood. One therapist unexpectedly gave me some amazing advice that I share with you today. I also share a parenting win that demonstrates how all the work you're doing by educating yourself on intergenerational trauma can positively affecting your children and posterity! Thanks for listening! Let me know what you think of the podcast. Rate and review so I can hear what you enjoy and bring you more of it.  Healing is possible! You can join my free monthly Ambitious Women's Goal seeting group for support and encouragement towards whatever life goals you're reaching. Find me on Instagram or DM me to learn the details. I'd love to hear from you! https://www.instagram.com/iheartserin/Please rate and review the podcast to let me know you're listening! Thank you! Join the facebook group: Survivors of Trauma Unite! https://www.facebook.com/groups/925184671535182

FREE WORKSHOP: FIRST WEDNESDAY OF EACH MONTH, 4pm PSTHave you been listening to that little voice inside you that wants you to follow your deepest desires?  If you have- you're awesome, keep at it! If you have had trouble following through on your bucket-list goals or even smaller self-care goals like me, then I have the perfect opportunity for you! I'm hosting a FREE monthly GOAL- SETTING WORKSHOP for any women who want to tackle their personal goals, big or small. I want to continue on my path of following my self-care and creative goals right along with you. DM me for the zoom code @iheartserin or join my Facebook group Survivors of Trauma Unite where the zoom code will be. Monthly workshops in the future will be the FIRST WEDNESDAY of the month at 4pm PST.  If you would prefer a weekend meet-up time because the weekday meet doesnt work in your schedule, let me know and I'll consider trying that out in the future. Thanks! Take Care!!! :-)  Healing is possible! You can join my free monthly Ambitious Women's Goal seeting group for support and encouragement towards whatever life goals you're reaching. Find me on Instagram or DM me to learn the details. I'd love to hear from you! https://www.instagram.com/iheartserin/Please rate and review the podcast to let me know you're listening! Thank you! Join the facebook group: Survivors of Trauma Unite! https://www.facebook.com/groups/925184671535182

Today's guest,  Jen Towns, has a PhD in Clinical Social Work and recently published a book that gives advice for queer lovers navigating trauma. The book is called "Our Deepest Roots: Navigating Past Trauma to Build Healtheir Queer Relationships."https://www.amazon.com/Our-Deepest-Roots-Navigating-Relationships/dp/B0C6R9CCZD/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1691354079&sr=8-1Jen and I discuss how being queer brings its own set of lived trauma to our love relationships and how we can show up to support our partners, and ourselves, when there is relational conflict. Jen teaches and believes that trauma doesn't happen just in the brain, it happens in the body, and she uses different modalities to treat her clients including EMDR, Internal Family Systems, and DBT, among others.  Jen answers my deepest question of, how do I fit in being bisexual? and How much do I need to be healed to have a healthy relationship? You can find Jen on Instagram/Tiktok@ https://www.instagram.com/your.queer.therapist/Website: https://www.yourqueertherapist.net/ Healing is possible! You can join my free monthly Ambitious Women's Goal seeting group for support and encouragement towards whatever life goals you're reaching. Find me on Instagram or DM me to learn the details. I'd love to hear from you! https://www.instagram.com/iheartserin/Please rate and review the podcast to let me know you're listening! Thank you! Join the facebook group: Survivors of Trauma Unite! https://www.facebook.com/groups/925184671535182

You you have to have ten good reasons to buy something, or is the reason "because I like it" enough?  I have a tendency to be cheap. In life this has helped me stay out of debt and probably lessened my carbon footprint, but it has also stopped me from listening to my intuition and feeling joy! Because I supress my desires at times, I've decided I can be "dysfunctionally frugal." I'm learning how to stop being dysfunctionally frugal. Today I share three ways I've embraced my desires this summer in going places and buying things that make me happy for no other reason than "becuase I want to" or "because I like it." To me, it feels like leveling up towards becoming the woman I want to be- who enjoys life and follows her dreams. Ready to join me? Thanks for listening!  Healing is possible! You can join my free monthly Ambitious Women's Goal seeting group for support and encouragement towards whatever life goals you're reaching. Find me on Instagram or DM me to learn the details. I'd love to hear from you! https://www.instagram.com/iheartserin/Please rate and review the podcast to let me know you're listening! Thank you! Join the facebook group: Survivors of Trauma Unite! https://www.facebook.com/groups/925184671535182

Erin Tagan is an ontological life coach, which means she often ponders the question, "Who do you want to be?" (Emphasis on BE-ing) Erin and I discuss how to go about creating the life you've always wanted and what roadblocks you might encounter along the way. Erin Tagan is offering any Grace + Boundaries podcast listeners a COMPLIMENTARY coaching session to help you get out of your comfort zone and start living the life you've always wanted! You can find her at https://themagicverb.com/ or Instagram https://www.instagram.com/themagicverb/ Healing is possible! You can join my free monthly Ambitious Women's Goal seeting group for support and encouragement towards whatever life goals you're reaching. Find me on Instagram or DM me to learn the details. I'd love to hear from you! https://www.instagram.com/iheartserin/Please rate and review the podcast to let me know you're listening! Thank you! Join the facebook group: Survivors of Trauma Unite! https://www.facebook.com/groups/925184671535182

Do you have mother wounds? According to Mark Wolynn, 85% of us do. I am definitely one of that statistic. Today I share about how I've changed and grown in terms of my relationship with my mother, and how I realize now that it has very little to do with her anymore. It is up to me to do the healing work on my own, to heal my own heart so I can share grace and love wherever I go and attract a healthier partner into my orbit.  I give you a practical guide of what to do each night and what to say to relieve your suffering surrounding resentments and wounds with your mother, or others. Good luck with this practice! I hope it relieves you of worry, guilt, and suffering. Let me know how it goes! Mark Wolynn's Website: https://markwolynn.com/ and book https://www.amazon.com/It-Didnt-Start-with-You-audiobook/dp/B01ELP3ACY/ref=sr_1_2?crid=1V7N2E85J48AI&keywords=mark+wolynn&qid=1689710629&sprefix=mark+wolynn%2Caps%2C348&sr=8-2I mention the book Alcoholics Anonymous: https://www.amazon.com/Alcoholics-Fourth-Official-Book-Alcoholic/dp/B08TT4DTLY/ref=sr_1_1?crid=1XQV6NL8ID06W&keywords=alcoholics+anonymous&qid=1689710701&s=audible&sprefix=alcoholics+anonymous%2Caudible%2C177&sr=1-1 Healing is possible! You can join my free monthly Ambitious Women's Goal seeting group for support and encouragement towards whatever life goals you're reaching. Find me on Instagram or DM me to learn the details. I'd love to hear from you! https://www.instagram.com/iheartserin/Please rate and review the podcast to let me know you're listening! Thank you! Join the facebook group: Survivors of Trauma Unite! https://www.facebook.com/groups/925184671535182

Today's episode could be considered a little "woo-woo." But the truth is that invisible energies are circulating around us at all times, influencing our lives and magnetising our environments. This is the first of three episoes that I share about my therapy session with author, researched, and therapist Mark Wolynn. You can learn more about him here https://markwolynn.com/ or listen to this great podcast that rocked my world where he talks to Mark Groves about inhereted family trauma: https://podcasts.apple.com/ca/podcast/mark-wolynn-what-trauma-have-you-inherited/id1282044290?i=1000447768156I share what somatic therapy was like for me and how being a premature, incubator baby, influences the rest of a child's life.  Has instagram handleFind a way to heal! It's possible! You can join my free monthly Ambitious Women's Goal seeting group for support and encouragement towards whatever life goals you're reaching. Find me on Instagram or DM me to learn the details. I'd love to hear from you! https://www.instagram.com/iheartserin/Join the facebook group: Survivors of Trauma Unite! https://www.facebook.com/groups/925184671535182

I'm excited to share with you an interview with the captivating Gloria Zhang! Gloria Zhang (based out of Canada) is a renowned relationship coach, entrepreneur, and former psychotherapist known for her signature style of translating esoteric ideas into everyday wisdom. Gloria hosts the global sensation, 'The Inner Child Podcast,' a self-help series which has captivated audiences across the globe, accumulating over 1.2 million downloads. Gloria enjoys a quiet life with her life partner, taking pleasure in the simple joys of coffee and anime.Check out Gloria's podcast here: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-inner-child-podcast/id1556545696Join Gloria's Soulmate Program Here: https://bygloriazhang.com/ Has instagram handleFind a way to heal! It's possible! You can join my free monthly Ambitious Women's Goal seeting group for support and encouragement towards whatever life goals you're reaching. Find me on Instagram or DM me to learn the details. I'd love to hear from you! https://www.instagram.com/iheartserin/Join the facebook group: Survivors of Trauma Unite! https://www.facebook.com/groups/925184671535182

Welcome to the first episode of my re-titled podcast! This podcast, formerly known as Self-Care for Survivors of Trauma, has been RENAMED Grace + Boundaries: Navigating Intergenerational Trauma! I'm fascinated by studying Intergenerational trauma and I wanted to share with you all why it's been the key to me learning how to be more graceful in all my relationships. On today's episode, I share the two big mindshifs I've experienced over the past few months that have led me to feeling like a newer, better, more emotionally regulated, version of myself.  Firstly, I made strides in setting healthy boundaries to protect my creative energy. Secondly, I had a miraculous shift in my viewpoint about others who have hurt or abused me in the past and how to navigate my relationships with them in the future. It all comes down to holding my boundaries in place with GRACE. Thank you for trying something new and listening! Let me know what you think of the new title and artwork. I love you all! --Erin. Has instagram handleFind a way to heal! It's possible! You can join my free monthly Ambitious Women's Goal seeting group for support and encouragement towards whatever life goals you're reaching. Find me on Instagram or DM me to learn the details. I'd love to hear from you! https://www.instagram.com/iheartserin/Join the facebook group: Survivors of Trauma Unite! https://www.facebook.com/groups/925184671535182

My renamed podcast is coming soon! On Sunday I will drop new episodes for my reimagined podcast. Self-Care for Survivors of Trauma has now become "Grace  + Boundaries: Navigating Intergenerational Trauma with Erin Hearts." I've grown so much in the past two years that I was ready to rename and move forward into being more graceful as I navigate relationships with family and loved ones. What do you think of the new artwork? Let me know! @ihearserin or you can join my facebook group: Survivors of Trauma Unite.  Has instagram handleDM me on Instagram! I'd love to hear from you! https://www.instagram.com/iheartserin/Join the facebook group: Survivors of Trauma Unite! https://www.facebook.com/groups/925184671535182

I'm changing the podcast title and artwork, coming soon! This will be my final episode of the podcast under the name of Self-Care for Survivors of Trauma. My updated version will also be about trauma, through another lense, so stay tunned! Today I share what it's been like to join Hinge, the dating app, for my first time. I tried it out Friday-Sunday this weekend, and learned a lot about myself and the dating world. I find online dating confusing and challenging in a lot of ways, but it can be a little bit of fun if I don't take it too seriously. How has online dating been going for you? Share your story with me on Instagram! I'd love to hear from you.  Has instagram handleDM me on Instagram! I'd love to hear from you! https://www.instagram.com/iheartserin/Join the facebook group: Survivors of Trauma Unite! https://www.facebook.com/groups/925184671535182

" Start before you're ready" can be great advice if you're trying to make progress on life's bucket list. I share about what it means to me to start before I'm ready. I give examples of how you can break down your goals into hour-long tasks to put into your calendar each week. I also share a story about me starting dating before I was ready, and what happened with that crazy advice from a therapist. Thanks for listening! You can join my free Facebook Group "Survivors of Trauma Unite. "Gloria Zhang's Podcast: https://bygloriazhang.com/podcast Has instagram handleDM me on Instagram! I'd love to hear from you! https://www.instagram.com/iheartserin/Join the facebook group: Survivors of Trauma Unite! https://www.facebook.com/groups/925184671535182

I've struggled with binge eating most of my life. I don't have a severe eating disorder, but food issues have been a part of the coping mechanisms I developed during my childhood traumas of sexual abuse and emotional neglect. Binge eating, because I'm of an average weight and it's a taboo topic, is not something I've talked about with many friendsBut this past weekend, I mentioned it to someone close to me and felt some freedom slip in. I did a meditation that night about my abandonment wounds. This led me to realizing that there is a deep connection for me between my abandonment feelings, dissociation, and binge eating. I explain this connection in the podcast today. I'm grateful for you! Thank you for listening.  Has instagram handleDM me on Instagram! I'd love to hear from you! https://www.instagram.com/iheartserin/Join the facebook group: Survivors of Trauma Unite! https://www.facebook.com/groups/925184671535182