Podcasts about traumatic

Send us a textOn this episode of the Psychedelic Therapy Frontiers podcast, Dr. Steve Thayer and Dr. Reid Robison discuss "bad trips". They talk about the difference between bad trips and challenging experiences; the factors during prep, facilitation, and integration that can prevent bad trips or turn them into useful challenging experiences; the prevalence of triggered psychosis and HPPD among psychedelic users; how to pick the right psychedelic therapist/guide/facilitator; and much more. *This episode originally aired 3/21/23(1:35) Are bad trips possible?(4:00) What is the difference between a bad trip vs a challenging experience?(7:00) How preparation affects the psychedelic experience(9:58) The importance of supportive community(14:05) What does informed consent in psychedelic-assisted therapy really mean?(16:00) How prevalent are challenging psychedelic experiences?(19:18) How the therapist/guide affects the psychedelic experience(24:28) Be discerning and take it slow(27:25) Emotional breakthrough, catharsis, and abreaction(36:32) The Happiness Hypothesis, by Jonathan Haidt(40:22) Understanding the psychodrama that can happen in a psychedelic experience(46:50) Hallucinogen Persisting Perception Disorder (HPPD) and psychedelic flashbacks(51:01) Dream interpretation(55:14) How to integrate and make meaning of a psychedelic experience(59:23) After the Ecstasy, the Laundry, by Jack Kornfield(01:01:31) How to navigate a bad trip(01:10:07) Using "trip stoppers" like benzodiazepinesLearn more about our podcast at https://numinusnetwork.com/learn/podcast/Learn more about psychedelic therapy training opportunities at https://numinusnetwork.com/training/Learn more about our clinical trials at https://www.numinusnetwork.com/researchLearn more about Numinus at https://numinusnetwork.com/Email us at ptfpodcast@numinus.com Follow us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drstevethayer/https://www.instagram.com/innerspacedoctor/https://www.instagram.com/numinushealth/

 Trigger Warning: This episode contains discussions of abuse, trauma, and survival. Listener discretion is advised.In this powerful episode, The Rescue – I'm Never Going Back, we dive into a deeply personal and emotional journey of escape, survival, and transformation.  You can heal after Trauma, there appears to be a misconception that if you experience some type of Traumatic event your life is ruined.  Help is available and I share available options.  A message for you, you are not alone and you can heal and life filled with joy.With courage & clarity. Apple Podcasts | Spotify | Google Podcasts | Spreaker | Castbox and more. Connect with the host:Instagram: @AuthenticTalks2.0 Email: AuthenticShanta@gmail.com Website: www.AuthenticTalks2.com Facebook: AuthenticTalks2 Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/authentic-talks-2-0-with-shanta--4116672/support.

To Align with your Divine within is to Align with your humanity. Essence of our humanity is under attack- not by demons, aliens, or Artificial Intelligence  per se, but by self appointed self anointed global leaders who are hellbent on destroying our spirit of humanity. It was my experience as detailed in ACCESS DENIED For Reasons of National Security that these globalist perpeTraitors follow a linear DARPA generated plan. They believe all creation, our planet included, is flawed in its divine design, just as they believe our bodies need their 78+ vaccines to fix ‘genetic flaws'. These dark perpeTraitors feel justified in ‘saving' our planet from their belief the sun is destroying it. DARPA's conclusion inspires believers to play god by cross breeding genetically altered humanity with AI while also actively working to block our sun. The audacity of these power mongers is inconceivable!As my daughter Kelly observed, “Sun is the SOULar battery of all existence on earth.”We need sunlight for optimum mental health and for grounding into our true nature. Our nature is our humanity- who we are intended to be and how life is intended to be lived.To disrupt our essence of humanity, mind control is being used to block our ability to Align with our Divine within, which in turn inhibits access to soul expression, strength of spirit, and our innate energy source of infinite power of love. Without free thought, there is no free will soul expression. No ability to remember who we are and why we are here. No capacity for connecting with each other on energetic, loving levels of compassion, understanding, and unity. United we stand against these perpeTraitors of humanity who mask themselves as gods to lord over our existence.Equally as alarming as discussed by George Bush Sr. at Bohemian Grove in 1985 is that if their New World Order agenda fails, then those playing god will destroy our planet. Wouldn't blocking the sun do that anyway? Semantics aside, the end game of these dark negative energy force perpeTraitors is our demise. When we Align with our Divine within, we have wisdom. Wisdom is our saving grace to outthink criminal minds and AI's linear plan every time.  Preservation of free thought is key. Knowledge is our defense against their mind control.Traumatic fear is the basis of all mind control as puppetmasters manipulate humanity's brain defense mechanism against incomprehensible trauma to their advantage. It was found through Hitler/Himmler research that there is no trauma more horrific on the human mind than sexual abuse of a child prior to age 5 while the brain is still forming. Similarly satanic ritual abuse has the same effect of shutting down neuron pathways of conscious thought, leaving the subconscious wide open to being led, manipulated, and programmed to drive future thoughts.Many children, including myself, have experienced trauma beyond comprehension to render us compliant and malleable for controllers' vision of how life should be lived based on their own fears that the world is ending. Our humanity is under attack because our strength of spirit is perpeTraitors' greatest fear. Many children, me included, witnessed other children being sacrificed at their alter of justification. Many victims of traumatic mind control died, which is also in keeping with depopulation agenda to reduce humanity's numbers to a much more manageable size. Abusers have no remorse in their justifications. Yet children who witness and experience the demise of others are left with the same traumatic dilemma that most military veterans experience:Why did I survive when others didn't?Read the full article on Cathy's website Here!

On this week's podcast Chris is feeling under the weather but still manages a new quiz format for Rosie to take part in. Beefs include farts and a new (ish) mattress! QFTP's cover a very unfortunate shoulder injury, a fire plan and a sh*t story from a Midwife. Also this week Rosie calls on Kate to validate her travelling chip fire school memory.

Lexi Wood has been modeling for nearly 17 years, but you probably know her from the headlines. In this episode, we unpack the back-and-forth drama with Jesse, her raw take on a traumatic life moment, and why she thinks people constantly underestimate her intelligence. Lexi gets real about the pressure of being misunderstood, the blurred lines of public relationships, and whether she's coming back to Summer House this season. Spoiler: she doesn't hold back.

Charlie shares his thoughts on the Anniversary of His Son's Death: https://bit.ly/4dn8RpUTraumatic grief is grief and mourning over a death that came about in traumatic circumstances (e.g. sudden, suicide, murder). This week Charlie talks about the murder of his 21-year-old son which occurred outside a bodega in New York City, five years ago. This heartbreaking story brings into focus the value of advance care planning, organ donation, and the ongoing pain that comes with the death of a child. In this Episode:01:31 - Road Trip: New Hampshire and the Origin of "Live Free or Die"03:24 - Poutine, Canada's version of smothered fries05:18 -  Grieving a Murdered Son: Charlie's Personal Story 13:33 - Eric Clapton's "Tears in Heaven"15:26 - OutroRelated Content:S1E11: GriefS1E12: Traumatic GriefS4E39: Traumatic Grief: What it is and How to Find a Therapist to Help Manage ItS3E38: Navigating Grief and Healing from Loss – with Dr. Ken DokaS1E52: Coping with a Child's DeathS1E28: Organ DonationS1E09: Advance DirectivesAdvance Directives – a firsthand accountS1E41: When someone you love dies from an overdoseSupport the showGet show notes and resources at our website: every1dies.org. Facebook | Instagram | YouTube | mail@every1dies.org

A traumatic first birth can shape everything that follows—but with the right support, education, and advocacy, it's possible to turn fear into empowerment.   In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Dekker sits down with EBB Childbirth Class Graduates Rivka and Steven Dubinsky as they share the transformative journey from a traumatic hospital induction and birth injury to a redemptive second birth experience centered on autonomy, education, and trust. Rivka opens up about how her first birth left her physically injured and emotionally shaken, and how she didn't initially recognize it as trauma. Over time—and with therapy, research, and support—she came to understand what had been taken from her. Determined to have a different experience with her second child, she carefully selected a trauma-informed OB, dove into birth education, and found strength in preparing for every possibility.   Together, Rivka and Steven share how they prepared as a team, how Steven stepped into his advocacy role during labor, and why they chose to “fire” a hospital-assigned doula. They also reflect on the surprising power of reclaiming their voice—even in the midst of pain—and how a supported birth experience can shift everything.   Content Note: This episode includes discussion of birth trauma. This episode also contains mild language at 45:55.   (01:48) Rivka's First Birth and the Silent Cost of Lost Autonomy (07:13) Steven's Reflections on Feeling Unprepared to Support (10:45) Moving to Ohio and Choosing Trauma-Informed Care (14:02) Becoming an “Information Junkie” and Taking the EBB Childbirth Class (17:02) Steven Learns Advocacy Through EBB (22:14) From Elective Cesarean Plan to Informed Induction (29:18) Navigating Nursing Styles and Hospital Systems (36:00) Epidural Differences and Listening to Her Body (40:50) Hands-On, Informed Support During Pushing (43:39) A Sunny-Side-Up Baby and Immediate Skin-to-Skin (45:53) Feeling Empowered, Present, and Powerful (50:06) Advice for Families Seeking Trauma-Informed Birth Care   Resources Learn more about Rivka and Steven's EBB Instructor, Aly Romot: @alyromotdoula For more information about Evidence Based Birth® and a crash course on evidence based care, visit www.ebbirth.com. Follow us on Instagram and YouTube! Ready to learn more? Grab an EBB Podcast Listening Guide or read Dr. Dekker's book, "Babies Are Not Pizzas: They're Born, Not Delivered!" If you want to get involved at EBB, join our Professional membership (scholarship options available) and get on the wait list for our EBB Instructor program. Find an EBB Instructor here, and click here to learn more about the EBB Childbirth Class.  

Welcome back to The Journey Podcast in today's episode Seth Gehle shares his deeply personal journey as a male survivor of childhood sexual abuse and domestic trauma. From enduring an abusive home environment with his mother to being manipulated and sexually abused by a predator from ages 10 to 16, Seth's story is one of pain, survival, and ultimately hope.Seth opens up about what it was like to live in fear, the emotional toll of grooming, and how escaping one form of abuse led him into another. Now, years later, he's using his voice to raise awareness, challenge stigma around sexual abuse victims, and offer hope to others walking a similar path.Get Seth's Book! https://a.co/d/hvatgxEEXCLUSIVE AD FREE EPISODEShttps://www.patreon.com/c/TheJourneyPodYouTubehttps://www.youtube.com/@TheJourneyPodcast_APPLE https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-journey-podcast/id1525956495INSTAGRAMhttps://www.instagram.com/zacharycummings_https://www.instagram.com/jakemoscatohttps://www.instagram.com/thejourneypodcasthttps://www.instagram.com/seth_gehleTik Tok https://www.tiktok.com/@thejourneypodcast__#sethgehle #childhoodtrauma #sexualabusesurvivor #domesticabuse

A woman floats from her 12th-story apartment into a waiting UFO — witnessed by bodyguards, dignitaries, and possibly the United Nations itself.Download the FREE WORD SEARCH GAME and CROSSWORD PUZZLE For This Episode: https://weirddarkness.com/manhattanttransferabductionGet the Darkness Syndicate version of #WeirdDarkness: https://weirddarkness.com/syndicateDISCLAIMER: Ads heard during the podcast that are not in my voice are placed by third party agencies outside of my control and should not imply an endorsement by Weird Darkness or myself. *** Stories and content in Weird Darkness can be disturbing for some listeners and intended for mature audiences only. Parental discretion is strongly advised.IN THIS EPISODE: I'll share a heartbreaking story of love gone wrong. It's a tale of passion, betrayal, murder, and the electric chair. (Love And The Electric Chair) *** The terrifying true story of the abduction of Linda Cortile – was she truly abucted by aliens or is there another explanation? (The Abduction of Linda Cortile) *** A man keeps seeing shadowy figures in his peripheral vision. (Her Feet Were Swinging) *** They say the widow's ghost lingers in the tower of the Drish House - and sets the house ablaze with phantom fire. (The Drish House Hauntings) * It is said that some hundred years ago, people in Jamaica believed the powers of so-called “Shadow Killers” - but who or what were they? (The Shadow Killers of Jamaica) *** Fifteen acres of land purchased by the city of Long Beach, California in 1976 is what comprises a place known as DeForest Park.  By day it is filled with sun, sand, and fun. By night, it is filled with shudders, scares, and screams. (The Darkness of DeForest Park) *** Friends were planning for a good time of dirt biking, hunting, and drinking beer. They should never have visited the cemetery. (The Haunted Farmstead) *** Two women walking home in the twilight come across the ghost of a woman dead for the past year. *** A man tells the terrifying story of how he was possessed by a demon. *** Two girls discover that even if you don't believe a legend of ghostly children, you still shouldn't tease them. *** If you vacation at Carlsbad Lagoon, you'll need something stronger than sunscreen to protect you. *** Traumatic events can sometimes trigger poltergeist activity, but for one young girl, the torment seemed to have no end. *** The hills of Northern Chile are not safe for men walking alone at night.  A female spirit known as La Lola stalks the night, lost and enraged over the murder of her husband. *** Glowing eyes in the dark, a man in a dark suit, and a party in the other room… none of which are real, except to two young girls who swear it actually happened. *** Lehigh, Oklahoma – with the dark past of gangsters, the KKK, a corrupt sheriff… and the paranormal. CHAPTERS & TIME STAMPS (All Times Approximate)…00:00:00.000 = Lead-In00:00:58.241 = Show Open00:04:17.776 = The Alien Abduction of Linda Cortile00:14:03.089 = The Drish Hauntings00:18:34.050 = The Darkness of DeForest Park00:22:14.775 = The Haunted Farmstead00:29:53.431 = The Shadow Killers of Jamaica00:35:32.769 = Her Feet Were Swinging00:39:41.767 = Love And The Electric Chair00:49:04.364 = My First Spooky Experience00:54:01.633 = The Haunting of Laura01:04:28.806 = The Ghostly Kids of Hungry Hollow Road01:07:08.902 = I Was Possessed By a Demon01:10:48.372 = The Woman In The Blue Sari01:13:13.940 = The Woman IN The Blue Sari01:16:49.465 = La Lola, The Vengeful Female Spirit of Northern Chile01:20:38.776 = Haunted Lehigh, Oklahoma01:26:20.159 = Show CloseSOURCES AND RESOURCES FROM THE EPISODE…“Love And The Electric Chair” by Troy Taylor: https://weirddarkness.tiny.us/y9x5dszv“The Abduction of Linda Cortile” by Les Hewitt for Paranorms.com: https://weirddarkness.tiny.us/1s7n41oz“Her Feet Were Swinging” from YourGhostStories.com: https://weirddarkness.tiny.us/504clul2“The Drish Hauntings” by Elisabeth Tilstra for The Line Up: https://weirddarkness.tiny.us/2dqwhue5“The Darkness of DeForest Park” from BackpackerVerse: https://weirddarkness.tiny.us/1x5i7veu“The Haunted Farmstead” from GhostsNGhouls.com (link no longer valid)“The Shadow Killers of Jamaica” from MessageToEagle.com: https://weirddarkness.tiny.us/4jjws8tp“The Woman in the Blue Sari” by Amardeep Singh for MyHauntedLifeToo.com: https://weirddarkness.tiny.us/3ozpxps6“I Was Possessed By a Demon” by Jon Austin for Express.co.uk: https://weirddarkness.tiny.us/m9m5jbe0“The Ghostly Kids of Hungry Hollow Road” submitted anonymously to Weird Darkness: https://weirddarkness.tiny.us/drwxy79f“Carlsbad Lagoon's Sinister Siren” from BackpackerVerse: https://weirddarkness.tiny.us/1d1sye5y“The Haunting of Laura” from ThoughtCo.com (link no longer available)“La Lola: The Vengeful Female Spirit in Northern Chile“ from ParanormalInvestigating.com (website no longer exists)“My First Spooky Experience” submitted anonymously to Weird Darkness: https://weirddarkness.tiny.us/mmw30w8x“Haunted Lehigh, Oklahoma” by Paul Dale Roberts, submitted to MyHauntedLifeToo.com: https://weirddarkness.tiny.us/4yj3u7ay=====(Over time links seen above may become invalid, disappear, or have different content. I always make sure to give authors credit for the material I use whenever possible. If I somehow overlooked doing so for a story, or if a credit is incorrect, please let me know and I will rectify it in these show notes immediately. Some links included above may benefit me financially through qualifying purchases.)= = = = ="I have come into the world as a light, so that no one who believes in me should stay in darkness." — John 12:46= = = = =WeirdDarkness® is a registered trademark. Copyright ©2025, Weird Darkness.=====Originally aired: February 2019EPISODE PAGE at WeirdDarkness.com (includes list of sources): https://weirddarkness.com/ManhattanTransferAbductionTAGS: weird darkness, Linda Cortile abduction, Manhattan Transfer Abduction, Budd Hopkins UFO, alien abduction case, Linda Napolitano, alien abductions New York, UN Secretary General UFO, Javier Perez de Cuellar UFO, Brooklyn Bridge UFO sighting, 1989 alien abduction, gray aliens, real alien abductions, Budd Hopkins books, Intruders Copley Woods, UFO eyewitness accounts, alien abduction hypnosis, CIA UFO cover-up, alien abduction investigation, Linda Cortile case witnesses, UFO sightings New York City

Check his testicles. A new video has come out showing the Pirates fan who fell out of the stands from a different angle. Life coach Nina Aouilk joins the show to share her story about her traumatic childhood and how her parents tried to kill her.

Check his testicles. A new video has come out showing the Pirates fan who fell out of the stands from a different angle. Life coach Nina Aouilk joins the show to share her story about her traumatic childhood and how her parents tried to kill her. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Ross Wehner shares his journey of discovering and uncovering his purpose through experiences in Chile and teaching. He emphasizes the importance of following intuition and stepping into one's own story. Ross discusses the impact of traumatic events and the role of darkness in shaping purpose. He highlights the influence of philosophy, solitude, and fasting in gaining clarity. Ross also explains the mission of World Leadership School in partnering with K-12 schools to reimagine learning and create next-generation leaders. He advocates for purpose learning and the integration of thinking, feeling, and doing in education.   Takeaways Follow your intuition and step into your own story. Traumatic events can lead to a deeper understanding of purpose. Solitude and fasting can provide clarity and insight. Education should focus on purpose learning, integrating thinking, feeling, and doing. Chapters Introduction and Background Engagement with Purpose in Chile Impact of Traumatic Events Stepping into Purpose Uncovering Purpose Transitioning to Teaching Finding Meaning in Teaching and Wilderness Instruction Uncovering Purpose with the Help of a Coach Living the Story of Purpose Influence of Philosophy on Purpose Navigating Darkness and Finding Purpose Seeking Solitude and Fasting for Clarity Purpose Learning and Reimagining Education Planting Seeds of Purpose in Education Balancing Classical Learning and Purpose Recommendations for Discovering Purpose Conclusion and Contact Information   Website: https://worldleadershipschool.com/

Welcome to Season 2 of the Orthobullets Podcast. Today's show is Coinflips, where expert speakers discuss grey zone decisions in orthopedic surgery. This episode will feature doctors Maximilian Heitmann, Jan Szatkowski, Richard Freeman, & Metwally Sayedahmad. They will discuss the case titled "⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Traumatic Foot Injury in 16F Athlete.⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠" Follow ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Orthobullets⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ on Social Media:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Facebook⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Twitter⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Linkedln⁠

If you have any topic suggestions for future episodes, don't hesitate to reach out! Send us an email at info@brainblownpodcast.com.We'd love to hear from you.REFERENCES"Appeasement: replacing Stockholm syndrome as a definition of a survival strategy" Rebecca Bailey, Jaycee Dugard, Stefanie F. Smith & Stephen W. Porges"Traumatic entrapment, appeasement and complex post-traumatic stress disorder: evolutionary perspectives of hostage reactions, domestic abuse and the Stockholm syndrome" Chris Cantor, John Price"Bonding after trauma: on the role of social support and the oxytocin system in traumatic stress,"  Miranda Olff"How Trauma Impacts Learning and How to Find Support" Nadia Albritton, MA"The Fawn Response in Complex PTSD" | Dr. Arielle Schwartz"Stockholm Syndrome Explained by the Stanford Prison Experiment"

Welcome back to let's get into it! We talk #chappellroan #kimkardashian #justinbieber #stagecoach #itendswithus #doritkemsley and MORE! Thank you to this episode's sponsor! • Shopify: Sign up for your one-dollar-per-month trial period at ⁠https://shopify.com/sloan⁠ Please support the Let's Get Into It Podcast: ⁠http://bit.ly/LetsGetIntoIt⁠ 

In today's update... - It's Election Day! Hannah and Jonny made some attack ads for eachother, as future political opponents! - One Second celebrity impressions that were WAY harder than we realized - Asking For A Friend: My sister skipped being my Maid Of Honour because her dog died... Am I the worst for not wanting to stand with her?

In this engaging and humorous podcast episode, the hosts discuss the launch of their new podcast, the need for a change in their lives, and the absurdity of world records, particularly focusing on a record-breaking gangbang. They explore the logistics behind such events, the moral implications of judgment, and compare unusual achievements. The conversation also delves into the realities of childbirth and parenting, highlighting the resilience of children and the often-overlooked challenges faced by parents. In this conversation, Dan shares personal anecdotes about parenting, medical advice, and the humorous side of embarrassing moments. He discusses how to handle emergencies with children, recounts traumatic childhood experiences related to injuries, and reflects on the role of confidence and humor in attractiveness. The conversation also touches on the impact of embarrassing moments and societal perceptions, particularly regarding body image and confidence. In this conversation, the speakers explore various themes including traditional gender roles, embarrassing social moments, the complexities of political discussions, cultural misunderstandings, the impact of true crime on relationships, the allure of reality TV, the lengths individuals go to for intimacy, and the importance of male friendships. Each topic is approached with humor and personal anecdotes, creating a relatable and engaging dialogue. Takeaways: The podcast serves as a venting space for the hosts. Laughter is essential for coping with life's challenges. World records can be absurd and humorous. Logistics play a crucial role in unconventional events. Judgment of others often reflects our own morals. Comparing achievements can reveal deeper insights. Childbirth is often not as gentle as expected. Parents often underestimate children's resilience. Humor can be found in the most unexpected places. Life experiences shape our perspectives on parenting. It's important to know basic emergency procedures for children. Traumatic experiences can shape our reactions to injuries. Humor often arises from embarrassing situations. Confidence can significantly enhance attractiveness. Personal stories of embarrassment can resonate with others. Childhood injuries can leave lasting impressions. Viral videos often highlight humorous moments involving larger individuals. Confidence in women can change perceptions of beauty. Embarrassing moments can create lasting memories. Cultural differences in language can lead to uncomfortable situations. Traditional gender roles are evolving but still prevalent. Embarrassing moments can create lasting memories. Political jokes can easily backfire in social settings. Cultural differences can lead to misunderstandings. True crime shows can affect relationship dynamics. Reality TV often blurs the line between entertainment and reality. Men often go to great lengths for intimacy. Friendship among men is crucial for mental health. Humor can be a coping mechanism for awkward situations. Engaging in social activities is important for well-being. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

this is my take on Kanye West's recent controversial lyrics and the implications of childhood trauma and porn addiction. He reflects on the courage it takes to express oneself and the societal judgments that often accompany such revelations. The discussion emphasizes the importance of healing and understanding the impact of past experiences on present behavior.

First aired on "Life Sucks Now What" April 4, 2024In this podcast episode, Dr. Natalie addresses the question of why some people feel stuck in relationships that do not serve them. She explains that there can be a dysregulation in the nervous system that keeps individuals trapped in these relationships. She emphasizes that it is not always a result of anxious or avoidant attachment or low self-worth. Dr. Natalie discusses the impact of past traumatic experiences on relationships and highlights the importance of resiliency and available resources. She also explores how early life experiences shape our patterns of behavior and responses to conflict. Dr. Natalie suggests that therapy can help individuals rebuild neural networks and develop healthier relationship patterns.Takeaways:- Feeling stuck in relationships that do not serve us can be a result of a dysregulation in the nervous system.- Traumatic experiences can impact our ability to form healthy relationships.- Resiliency and available resources play a crucial role in how we respond to traumatic events.- Early life experiences shape our patterns of behavior and responses to conflict.- Therapy can help individuals rebuild neural networks and develop healthier relationship patterns.Keywords: Negative people, Psychological dynamics, Attracting negativity, Positive mindset, Breaking free from negativity, Understanding relationships, Psychological underpinnings, Dr. Natalie Marr, Life Sucks, Now What?!?, Personal growth, toxic relationships, how to set boundaries, self-care, self-respectVisit us at LearnToLoveYourStory.com⁠ (https://LearnToLoveYourStory.com⁠) DISCLAIMER: The content in this podcast and video is not a replacement for therapy and is not clinical, medical, or mental health treatment. Dr. Natalie Marr is a Licensed Psychologist in the state of Minnesota. Her work with LearnToLoveYourStory.com (about:invalid#zCSafez) and all affiliate social media entities is educational and coaching based ONLY. She IS NOT offering therapeutic services of any kind on these mediums. If you or someone you know is having a mental health crisis or having thoughts of suicide, please use the following crisis resources (this is not an exhaustive list of available resources): National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: ⁠https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/ (about:invalid#zCSafez) ⁠CALL 988Crisis Text Line: ⁠https://www.crisistextline.org/ ⁠Text HOME to 741741

Send us a textShaun's journey is one of pain, survival, and ultimately, self-healing. Bullied as a child, beaten down emotionally and physically, he grew up feeling repulsive, unwanted, and angry. As a child he was jailed and over the next 25 years, he found himself trapped in a cycle of burglary, car theft, and incarceration.But prison didn't just hold him—it woke him up. Shaun fought for access to books and immersed himself in psychology. He found unexpected wisdom among the “lifers” who had built purpose into their permanent sentences. For the first time, Shaun began to understand his trauma, and how it shaped the choices that landed him behind bars.This episode is raw, honest, and deeply human. It's not just about crime—it's about the power of reflection, resilience, and redemption.

Join OANDA Senior Market Analysts & podcast guest Nick Syiek (TraderNick) as they review the latest market news and moves. MarketPulse provides up-to-the-minute analysis on forex, commodities and indices from around the world. MarketPulse is an award-winning news site that delivers round-the-clock commentary on a wide range of asset classes, as well as in-depth insights into the major economic trends and events that impact the markets. The content produced on this site is for general information purposes only and should not be construed to be advice, invitation, inducement, offer, recommendation or solicitation for investment or disinvestment in any financial instrument. Opinions expressed herein are those of the authors and not necessarily those of OANDA or any of its affiliates, officers or directors. If you would like to reproduce or redistribute any of the content found on MarketPulse, please access the RSS feed or contact us at info@marketpulse.com. © 2023 OANDA Business Information & Services Inc.

Sarasota Memorial's trauma team has seen a concerning increase in e-bike, scooter, and bicycle accidents. And with summer months just around the corner, they know more people will be getting outside and hitting the road for family vacations, which could also cause even more injuries. Trauma Injury Prevention Coordinator Casey Howell, RN, discusses how everyone in the community can do their part to prevent these traumatic accidents.You can also watch the video recording on our Vimeo channel here.For more health tips & news you can use from experts you trust, sign up for Sarasota Memorial's monthly digital newsletter, Healthe-Matters.

Today, we're diving into one of the most challenging and high-stakes procedures in trauma medicine—prehospital resuscitative thoracotomy (RT) for traumatic cardiac arrest (TCA). Joining me is Dr Mike Christian, the senior author of a recent study published in JAMA Surgery, which examines the impact of prehospital RT in London's Air Ambulance (LAA) system over two decades. TCA is often seen as a condition with a poor prognosis but for select patients—particularly those suffering from cardiac tamponade—prehospital RT has been shown to improve survival rates when performed within minutes of arrest. This study is the largest of its kind, analysing over 600 cases and shedding light on the effectiveness of RT, the critical time windows, and the factors that influence outcomes.In this episode, we'll explore the study's key findings, discuss the operational and ethical challenges of performing RT in the field, and consider what this means for the future of prehospital trauma care. The paper can be found here: https://jamanetwork.com/journals/jamasurgery/fullarticle/2830622A review and appraisal of the paper can be found here: https://www.stemlynsblog.org/laa-resuscitative-thoracotomy/This is an advertisement from BetterHelp.Stress and anxiety affect all of us—whether it's the daily pressures of work, life, or the unexpected moments that throw us off balance. As pre-hospital professionals, we see firsthand how mental health can impact lives, yet we often neglect our well-being.Anxiety can manifest in ways we don't always recognise—headaches, sleepless nights, or even feeling constantly on edge. In a world that demands more, sometimes the best thing you can do is pause, reflect, and seek support. Therapy isn't just for those in crisis—it's about learning coping strategies, setting boundaries, and becoming the best version of yourself.BetterHelp is the world's largest online therapy platform, connecting you with professionals specialising in anxiety and more. Take control of your mental health today. Our listeners get 10% off their first month at BetterHelp.com/CAREPODThis podcast is sponsored by PAX.Whatever kind of challenge you have to face - with PAX backpacks you are well-prepared. Whether on water, on land or in the air - PAX's versatile, flexible backpacks are perfectly suitable for your requirements and can be used in the most demanding of environments. Equally, PAX bags are built for comfort and rapid access to deliver the right gear at the right time to the right patient. To see more of their innovative designed product range, please click here:⁠https://www.pax-bags.com/en/⁠

In this deeply personal and powerful episode, Dr. Delia Chiaramonte shares her experience of traumatic loss of both her father and her father-in-law. Traumatic grief is not just about missing someone—it's about having your sense of the world torn apart. It can show up in surprising ways: emotional numbness, panic, guilt, dissociation, and even physical symptoms. In this episode, you'll learn how traumatic grief differs from more typical grief, and what helps people begin to heal.You'll also hear:Surprising aspects of traumatic grief that many people don't talk aboutEvidence-supported tools to support healing after traumatic lossThe importance of the body in trauma recoveryWhether you're grieving a traumatic loss or supporting someone who is, this episode offers a space for truth, tenderness, and the possibility of healing.Mentioned in This Episode:Suicide & Crisis Lifeline: Call or text 988 (24/7 free support)Therapies that may help: EMDR, Somatic Experiencing, trauma-informed grief therapyMind-body tools for trauma: grounding, breathwork, guided imagery, gentle movementConnect With Dr. Delia:Website: www.integrativepalliative.comLinkedIn: Delia Chiaramonte, MDIf This Episode Helped You…Please leave a rating or review on Apple Podcasts or SpotifyShare it with someone in your life who would benefit from hearing itSubscribe for more heart-centered episodes about serious illness, caregiving, and the healing journeyCoping Courageously: A Heart-Centered Guide for Navigating a Loved One's Illness Without Losing Yourself is available here: www.copingcourageously.com A free guide for physicians to help reclaim your joy at work and in life https://trainings.integrativepalliative.com/pl/2148540010Please review this podcast wherever you listen and forward your favorite episode to a friend! And be sure to subscribe!Sign up to stay connected and learn about upcoming programs:https://trainings.integrativepalliative.com/IPI-stay-in-touchI'm thrilled to be listed in Feedspot's top 15 palliative podcasts!https://blog.feedspot.com/palliative_care_podcasts/

The podcast was recorded in the days following the invasion of Ukraine. Hopefully, this war will end soon, but it's always smart to remember how it started.In this episode of the PFC Podcast, Dr. John Quinn provides an in-depth update on the medical response to the ongoing conflict in Ukraine. He discusses the evolution of medical training, the challenges faced in providing care, and the surprising developments in clinical practices amidst the war. The conversation highlights the logistical difficulties, the nature of injuries sustained, and the principles of casualty care that have emerged from the experience of prolonged field care in a conflict zone. In this conversation, the speakers discuss critical aspects of managing catastrophic bleeding, airway challenges, and the importance of preparation for transport in medical emergencies. They emphasize the risks associated with humanitarian work in Ukraine, the need for NGOs to engage with local needs, and advancements in blood management practices. The discussion also highlights the significance of sharing lessons learned from the ongoing conflict and the essential training topics for medical practitioners working in such environments.TakeawaysThe conflict has led to significant changes in medical training and practices.There has been a focus on prolonged field care due to extended evacuation times.Logistical challenges are a major issue in providing medical care.The quality of clinical care in Ukraine is impressive despite resource limitations.Injuries from modern warfare present unique challenges for medical responders.Scene safety is a critical principle in casualty care.Documentation of care is essential but challenging in conflict zones.Training and adherence to clinical guidelines have improved outcomes.Prolonged field care requires careful preparation and assessment before transport. Put a tourniquet on a patient with controlled hemorrhage.Prepare for transport by creating a problem list.Understand the severe risks of humanitarian work in Ukraine.Engage with local authorities to understand healthcare needs.Advocate for best practices in blood management and resuscitation.Share lessons learned from the conflict to improve future care.Anticipate challenges during transport to enhance patient outcomes.Traumatic brain injury is a growing concern in conflict zones.Utilize telemedicine for better communication and resource allocation.Focus on training for non-specialist surgeons in trauma care.Chapters00:00 Introduction to the Conflict and Medical Response02:07 Evolution of Medical Training in Ukraine05:14 Challenges and Improvements in Medical Care10:41 Surprising Developments in Clinical Care15:28 Logistical Challenges and Wound Patterns20:20 Prolonged Field Care and Evacuation Times25:29 Core Principles of Casualty Care34:04 Managing Catastrophic Bleeding and Airway Challenges39:51 Preparing for Transport: Anticipating Challenges44:35 Understanding the Risks of Humanitarian Work in Ukraine49:31 Engaging with Local Needs: Best Practices for NGOs51:52 Advancements in Blood Management and Resuscitation54:06 Sharing Lessons Learned from the Conflict58:45 Essential Training Topics for Medical Practitioners01:05:11 Closing Thoughts and Future DirectionsThank you to Delta Development Team for in part, sponsoring this podcast.⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠deltadevteam.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠For more content go to ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.prolongedfieldcare.org⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Consider supporting us: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠patreon.com/ProlongedFieldCareCollective⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.lobocoffeeco.com/product-page/prolonged-field-care⁠

In this heartfelt conversation, Glasgow-based designer Chris Wilson shares his journey as the one-person creative studio. He discusses his decision to embrace his solo status rather than pretending to be a larger agency, his traumatic experience being attacked with a knife as a university student, and how work became a crutch that ultimately led to burnout and hospitalisation. Chris opens up about discovering therapy later in life, managing client expectations by setting boundaries, and his ongoing evolution as a designer navigating new technologies and personal growth. His story reveals the challenges and rewards of running a small design business while prioritizing well-being.Key TakeawaysBeing authentic about running a solo studio created more trust with clients than pretending to be larger.Work can become a dangerous crutch that helps avoid dealing with emotional trauma.Setting clear boundaries with clients (four-day workweek, email-only communication) helped establish healthier work patterns.Traumatic events can significantly impact creative confidence and career choices.It's important to recognize burnout warnings before health deteriorates seriously.Therapy can be transformative even years after experiencing trauma.Embracing technological change (like AI) is essential for staying relevant in the creative industry.Finding a balance between personal development, client work, and emotional well-being is an ongoing journey.Small studios can build meaningful client relationships by guiding them through the entire creative process.Self-acceptance is crucial for both personal health and authentic creative work. Mindful Creative: How to understand and deal with the highs and lows of creative life, career and business Paperback and Kindle > https://amzn.to/4biTwFcFree audiobook (with Audible trial) > https://geni.us/free-audiobookSigned books https://novemberuniverse.co.ukLux Coffee Co. https://luxcoffee.co.uk/ (Use: PODCAST for 15% off)November Universe https://novemberuniverse.co.uk (Use: PODCAST for 10% off)

Ep. 21: This Technique Can Help You Navigate Traumatic Memories. Diana Jackson, therapist at House of Hope, continues our discussion from episode 20 by offering practical and general advice on how to deal with emotional triggers from past wounds that contribute to personal stress and poor relationship problems. The post Ep. 21: This Technique Can Help You Navigate Traumatic Memories appeared first on Journey Coaching.

In this powerful Listener Series episode, Courtney shares her deeply personal journey through birth trauma, miscarriage, and healing. From navigating unexpected medical challenges to advocating for herself in the face of systemic failures, her story is one of resilience, grief, and ultimately, self-discovery.On this episode, you will hear:

Traumatic invalidation, a powerful and often misunderstood concept, occurs when a person's emotions, behaviors, or identity are repeatedly dismissed, belittled, or rejected by important people in their lives. It can manifest as emotional neglect, severe criticism, unequal treatment, or outright denial of one's reality. In this P4P episode, we sit down with Dr. Robin Brody who shares her insights on how traumatic invalidation can directly challenge a person's sense of self-worth and belonging in the world and can play a significant role in the development and maintenance of PTSD. If you are interested in learning more about traumatic invalidation, and specifically what YOU can do to better assess and address it directly in your practice, take a listen to this episode. Helping individuals understand and name their experience of traumatic invalidation can be a profound step in their recovery!Dr. Robin Brody is an Assistant Professor of Psychiatry (Voluntary) at Weill Cornell Medicine and the founder of Dr. Robin Brody Psychological Services, a private practice specializing in the treatment of occupational trauma, PTSD, and couples therapy, and gender and sexually diverse individuals. Her work is driven by a deep commitment to helping trauma survivors, particularly those facing PTSD and moral injury.Her expertise and demonstrated passion center on treating trauma survivors, particularly those with PTSD and moral injury. Dr. Brody has worked with diverse populations of civilians, veterans of all branches and eras, first responders, healthcare workers, and 9/11 survivors and responders across the diagnostic and demographic spectrum. Dr. Brody started and ran an EBP for PTSD program within the World Trade Center Mental Health Program, where she trained and supervised providers in PE and CPT. Before joining Mount Sinai's World Trade Center Mental Health Program, Dr. Brody served on the faculty at Weill Cornell Medicine. In that capacity, Dr. Brody oversaw Weill Cornell's Military Families Wellness Center and worked within the Program for Anxiety and Traumatic Stress Studies (PATSS), where she was a co-investigator on numerous clinical research studies involving the treatment of PTSD, particularly among frontline healthcare workers amidst the COVID-19 pandemic. In all her efforts, Dr. Brody is committed to increasing access to, and training, in evidence-based treatments, especially for PTSD. Dr. Brody's research interests include PTSD treatment innovation and the role of shame, stigma, and identity in trauma recovery.Resources mentioned in this episode: https://dbtpe.org/Treating Trauma in Dialectical Behavior Therapy: The DBT Prolonged Exposure Protocol (DBT PE)Invalidating Childhood Environment ScalePractical for Your Practice voice mail: speakpipe.com/cdpp4pPractical for Your Practice email: cdp-podcast-ggg@usuhs.edu Calls-to-action: Take one of CDP's PTSD EBP trainings (PE, CPT). More info at: https://deploymentpsych.org/training Subscribe to The Center for Deployment Psychology Monthly Email at: https://deploymentpsych.org/CDP-MED-Opt-In

Why and how do we store certain memories and not others? What lifestyle elements influence memory for better or worse? Can traumatic memories be reframed and lead to reduction in symptoms?In this episode we get into the most recent research into memory. So, how we store memory; the different types; the way we actively construct it rather than simply receiving it; it's importance to our sense of self and framing of the world; to our attention and motivation; to our openness and updating our beliefs; and to Deja Vu. We talk about the influence of screen time and multi-tasking on memory; some unexpected life style factors that influence the quality of memory function and how they can feed into memory disorders; and we discuss traumatic memories and how we can reframe them, and the psychedelic research on that too.Fortunately, our guest is one of the world's most fun and knowledgeable authorities on memory, psychologist, neuroscientist, and head of the dynamic memory lab at The University of California Davis, Dr. Charan Ranganath. He's the author of over 120 scientific papers on memory and has recently released a fascinating book for the general public on all this, “Why We Remember”. Charan is also a rock guitarist with several bands so a man of many talents. What we discuss:00:00 intro. 07:20 The remembering self vs experiencing self. 09:30 We forget a lot, we're supposed to.11:00 Autobiographic memory.13:30 Episodic memory.14:20 Emotional intensity brings attention, which is linked to motivation.18:20 Association, cue and prompts, and the hippocampus.20:30 Memory athletes and training memory.21:51 Storifcation, mental schemas and ‘scaffolding' new memories with old blueprints.24:40 Preconceptions, bias and prejudice is baked into new memories.27:00 Imagining the past (re-membering) and imagining the future are very similar in the brain.29:15 The brain is not linear, rather a global network of dynamic interaction between brain regions simultaneously.31:29 Prediction error, goals, and memory enhancement.37:00 Dopamine drives our attention, interest and curiosity, multiplying remembering.43:20 Mental flexibility, youthful neuroplasticity, and openness to new experience.46::00 The ‘Stage of Life' theory of memory.49:00 The young brain needs to struggle to get the information they're curious about.50:15 Deja Vu research and familiarity.54:20 The environmental and social components of memory. 58:15 The act of remembering can change that memory.01:00:00 Collective memory - shared memories support sense of self.01:01:20 Life style factors: good for the body = good for the brain, so good for memory.01:02:00 The importance of vascular health and inflammation.01:06:30 Depression inversely correlates with memory.01:08:45 Screen time, focus and memory.01:10:20 Multi taking is actually switching, and leads to fragmented memories.01:12:30 Traumatic memories and reframing them.01:19:20 Psychedelic reframing of memories. 01:20:20 Extinction learning - learning to suppress memory prompts and re-write them.References:Charan Ranganth, “Why We Remember” Daniel Kahneman, “Thinking Fast and Slow”Hermann Ebbinghaus, “Memory: A Contribution to Experimental Psychology” 1885Endel Tulving, ‘Mental time travel'Frederic Bartlett, 1930 ‘Imagining the past and constructing the future'Mathias Gruber and Charan Ranganath, “How Curiosity Enhances Hippocampus-Dependent Memory: The Prediction, Appraisal, Curiosity, and Exploration (PACE) Framework” PaperAnne Cleary, Deja Vu experiments article

In this episode, Savannah asks Julie to chat about what drives male-to-female crossdressers to adopt a feminine presentation. What was the spark that initially led to the first and, ultimately, ongoing experiences of femdom? Did the thoughts come from a natural subconscious space or were there extenuating circumstances that conditioned the body to use femininity as a suit of armor against certain assaults? Savannah and Julie dig a little under the surface to raise awareness and further discussion.Examples of childhood trauma that could potentially contribute to gender dysphoria include: being forced to conform to gender stereotypes, severe gender-based bullying, physical or sexual abuse related to one's perceived gender, parental rejection of a child's gender expression, consistent misgendering, and experiences of extreme emotional neglect, particularly when tied to gender identity; essentially, any traumatic experience where a child feels deeply disconnected from their assigned gender due to societal expectations or negative interactions with others. -----SAVANNAH HAUK is the author of “Living with Crossdressing: Defining a New Normal” and “Living with Crossdressing: Discovering your True Identity“. While both focus on the male-to-female (mtf) crossdresser, “Defining a New Normal” delves into crossdressing and relationships and “Discovering Your True Identity” looks at the individual crossdressing journey. Her latest achievements are two TEDx Talks, one entitled "Demystifying the Crossdressing Experience" and the other "13 Milliseconds: First Impressions of Gender Expression". Savannah is a male-to-female dual-gender crossdresser who is visible in the Upstate of South Carolina, active in local groups and advocating as a public speaker at LGBTQ+ conferences and workshops across the United States. At the moment, Savannah is working on more books, blogs, and projects focused on letting every crossdresser–young and mature–find their own confidence, expression, identity and voice.IG @savannahhauk | FB @savannahhauk | FB @livingwithcrossdressing | web @livingwithcrossdressing.com------JULIE RUBENSTEIN is a dedicated ally to transgender community and the certified image consultant and co-owner of Fox and Hanger. F&H is a unique service for transgender women and male-to-female crossdressers that creates customized virtual fashion and style “lookbooks”. Julie intuitively connects with each client to find them appropriate clothes, makeup, hair, and shape wear all in alignment with their budget, body type, authentic style and unique personality. Julie also provides enfemme coaching and wardrobe support. Julie has made it her life's work to help MTF individuals feel safe and confident when it comes to their female persona, expression and identity.IG @Juliemtfstyle | FB @foxandhanger | web @FoxandHanger.com

Use our code for 10% off your next SeatGeek order*: https://seatgeek.onelink.me/RrnK/LAPLATICA2025 Sponsored by SeatGeek. *Restrictions apply. Max $20 discountBuenos días, La Plática fam! We wanted to jump start your week with not one, but two, very special guests - Kim and Vinny, TikTok's favorite couple!

Noel Fitzpatrick is a groundbreaking veterinary surgeon known for his pioneering work and compassionate approach to animal care. With a deep passion for healing and a remarkable ability to connect with both animals and their owners, he has built a reputation as one of the most innovative figures in veterinary medicine.In this episode, Noel opens up about the power of vulnerability and the unexpected freedom that comes from embracing life's deepest struggles. He reflects on personal loss, the lessons hidden in failure, and the strength that comes from honesty. Through his own experiences, he reveals how setbacks can serve as the foundation for success and why fear of failure should never stand in the way of ambition. Noel also speaks about his relentless pursuit to push the boundaries of veterinary medicine, particularly in treating pets with cancer.This episode is more than just a conversation, it's an invitation to reflect on love, loss, and what it truly means to persevere. 

Today, Dr Emily talks about hope. And in a world where things can feel a little bit hopeless, this really couldn’t have come at a better time. In contrast to all of our understanding up until this point, hope is not an emotion. Expertly defined by Dr Emily, hope is a belief. And most significantly, it can be learned, and it can be cultivated. Psychological mic-drop. This episode delves into strategies for creating both a sense of collective and individual hope, and in a discovery which happens to be VERY on-brand for this podcast, Dr Emily talks to the significance of vulnerability and connection in living a hopeful life. We hope you enjoy this one as much as we did. If you would like to watch this full episode on YouTube, follow this link - https://bit.ly/41j0pT1

In this powerful episode of the TriggeredAF Podcast, we sit down with global strategist, marketing expert, and leadership coach Charreah Jackson to explore a journey marked by trials, transformation, and triumph. Charreah opens up about her life-changing battle with cancer at just 25—a diagnosis that not only forced her to confront her worst fears but also set her on a path that eventually led to a once-in-a-lifetime moment: speaking with Oprah.   Watch the Conversation: https://youtu.be/KzDmCHwz5T0 Key Topics Discussed: Overcoming Life's Curveballs: Charreah shares her raw and personal experience of being diagnosed with cancer at a young age. She discusses how facing such a daunting challenge compelled her to re-evaluate her life priorities and make difficult decisions, including postponing or even canceling significant milestones like an engagement. Faith in the Midst of Uncertainty: Amid the chaos, Charreah emphasizes the importance of remaining faithful and trusting that a higher power is steering you through life's stormy waters.  Conquering Doubt and Fear: Dive into actionable insights on overcoming the paralyzing effects of doubt and fear when confronted with life's most challenging moments. Unexpected Encounters: Discover how Charreah's resilience and willingness to adapt not only helped her navigate personal hardship but also paved the way for extraordinary encounters—like landing a conversation with Oprah, an experience that underscores the unpredictable magic of life. Join us for an honest, heartfelt conversation that blends personal storytelling with practical wisdom. Whether you're in the midst of your own struggles or seeking inspiration to overcome obstacles, Charreah's journey offers a beacon of hope and a roadmap for transforming life's challenges into catalysts for growth.   SPONSORED BY: Just Thrive Now Expansion Program, visit to learn more: http://justthrivenow.com CONNECT WITH YOUR GUESTS: Charreah Jackson Instagram | https://www.instagram.com/charreah/ Website | https://shinearmy.com/   CONNECT WITH YOUR HOSTS: Alechia Reese Instagram | http://instagram.com/alechiareese Dani Bourdeau Instagram | http://instagram.com/thedanibourdeau   RESOURCES: For more info, visit: http://triggeredafpodcast.com IG: instagram.com/triggeredafpc FB: facebook.com/triggeredafpc YouTube: youtube.com/channel/@triggeredafpodcast   Triggered AF Podcast is produced by Triggered Media Group.

Grief and trauma are universal experiences and, as social workers, we know these issues will show up in our work, no matter our practice area. Grief is an inevitable part of life—but trauma can make the grieving process much more complex. That's where the Wendt Center for Loss and Healing comes in. With decades of experience, they provide critical support to individuals and communities navigating the intersection of grief and trauma. Since 1975, the Wendt Center has been a lifeline for people in the Greater Washington area, helping them rebuild a sense of safety and hope after loss, illness, violence, or other trauma. Nationally recognized for their expertise, they offer specialized support to children, adults, families, and communities, helping them heal from life's most challenging experiences. In this episode, we sit down with Melissa Sellevaag, LICSW, who leads the Wendt Center's Training Institute, to discuss how mental health professionals and allied workers can increase their capacity and confidence to support those impacted by grief and trauma. Don't miss this insightful conversation on a critical topic that touches us all.

Matt's being touring with Kylie, Britt got caught on the toilet and we chat a lot about...fruit? Join OG YouTuber & CEO Brittney Saunders, and Australia’s Biggest Glamazon Alright Hey as they break down the biggest stories of the week. If it’s trending, going viral, and has you gripped… we’re talking about it. LINKS Follow @alrighthey on all socials Follow @brittney_saunders on all socials Follow @novapodcastsofficial on Instagram Email us HERE scrollers@novapodcasts.com.au CREDITSHosts: Alright Hey and Brittney SaundersSenior Producer/Editor: Hannah Bowman Managing Producer: Elle Beattie Nova Entertainment acknowledges the traditional custodians of the land on which we recorded this podcast, the Gadigal People of the Eora Nation. We pay our respect to Elders past and present. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Today's podcast answers a question from someone who endured painful experiences at an early age and is struggling to understand how they can find their way back to a healthy place in the church, with God, and as a healthy orthodox Christian. Traumatic experiences leave us feeling bad, shameful, and defective. We often have to come to realize that it was the experiences that were deeply flawed, not us. Trauma teaches us to expect far more of ourselves than God would ever expect.

Today's interview is with Sara Cobb, who begins her powerful story by sharing that she was born into traumatic grief. Sara explains that her older brother passed away less than a year before she was born, and she reflects on how this loss impacted her and her surviving sibling as they grew up. Sara goes on to describe how grief shaped her family life, influenced her career choices, and contributed to a second devastating loss she endured later in life. Despite these challenges, Sara has developed an incredible resource to help others who are grieving similar losses. My Grief Connection has played a significant role in her healing and the healing of others also facing multiple losses. Key Takeaways: Impact on Family Life: The loss of her brother deeply affected not only Sara but also her older sibling. She shares how grief influenced their family dynamic as they grew up and navigated life without their brother. Career Choices and Personal Struggles: Sara reveals how the grief she experienced informed her career path. Additionally, she opens up about the second devastating loss she faced later in her life and how it further shaped her understanding of grief. Developing a Resource for Grievers: One of the most impactful aspects of Sara's journey is her creation of a resource designed to help others who are grieving similar losses. Mygriefconnection.org has become a valuable tool for many, contributing significantly to their healing process, particularly for those grieving multiple losses.

In this episode, Sam Ashoo, MD interviews Ashley Weisman, MD about her career in rural emergency medicine, and the February 2025 Emergency Medicine Practice article, Management of Traumatic Intracranial Hemorrhage in the Emergency Department Interview with Dr. Ashley WisemanIntroduction of Dr. Wiseman: Emergency physician specializing in rural ER.Dr. Wiseman's Background: Overview of her work and responsibilities in rural hospitals and academia.Experience in Rural Medicine: Contrast with urban and academic practice.Stories of practical challenges and learning experiences in remote areas like Kotzebue, Alaska.Practicing Skills in Rural MedicineDiscussion of skill retention: Importance of continuously applying and practicing critical skills.Resources and Training: Role of fellowship, networking, and practical experiences for skill enhancement.Advocacy for Rural Emergency MedicineWork with ACEP: Dr. Wiseman's efforts in advocating for rural EM at the national level.Collaboration Between Rural and Academic Centers: Importance of knowledge exchange and mutual support.Focus on Traumatic Intracranial Hemorrhage (ICH)Introduction to the February Article: Traumatic ICH in rural settings.Key Points from the Article:Importance of basic neurocritical care practices.Practical adjustments and simplified approaches in care.Dr. Wiseman's Contribution: How her experiences shaped the content and practical advice for rural medicine.ConclusionUpcoming Contributions: Announcing more contributions and resources from Dr. Wiseman.Access the In Rural Life (IRrL*) content here.Emergency Medicine Residents, get your free subscription by writing resident@ebmedicine.netManaging Traumatic Intracranial Hemorrhage in the Rural Setting: EMP: IRrL* If you practice in a rural environment, you know that managing a patient with traumatic ICH can present challenges with diagnostic and treatment resources, personnel, training, and transport. Dr. Weisman has created resources for emergency clinicians, IRrL* (In Rural Life*) that EB Medicine is proud to share with subscribers.   Resources for emergency clinicians managing patients with traumatic ICH in rural settings include: Checklist for Managing Traumatic Intracranial Hemorrhage in Rural Life (IRrL): 7 steps to providing neurocritical care in resource-limited settings.Simulation for Critical Access Neurocritical Care: Saving Brain Hours from Tertiary Care: A customizable simulation designed for you and your team to practice managing patients with brain injury.

Topics covered : Traumatic childhood, abandonment, disappointment, pain, breaking negative cycles, self-worth, sport, faith.Last year I sat down to speak to my next guest and I'm finally releasing our conversation.I spoke to Irish professional athlete and coach at Oberstown Children's Detention Centre, Ger Redmond.He's married to Pauline, who he describes as his rock and they have 5 kids together, 4 girls and a boy.A childhood of neglect and dysfunction led him on a destructive path in life which involved joining a gang for nearly 20 years.He turned to a life of criminality when his dream of becoming a professional footballer came to a cruel end due to an event that had devastating consequences for his family and another.He's not comfortable talking through the details of it during our conversation, out of respect to the other family involved.But to understand the severity of it, his father carried out an arson attack which claimed the life of a toddler.Many years later Ger himself spent a couple of years in prison but becoming a father to a son was the catalyst for change.When his son Ross was born in 2016, he completely changed his life. He threw himself into sport and set about breaking the negative cycles of behaviour that had caused so much harm to him and his siblings and today, his life's work is about helping and motivating others.To connect with Ger, go to…Ger Redmond Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Jase learns a valuable lesson from his buddy Tim Tebow about putting aside rivalries, and Al divulges the reason he's a lifelong Dodgers fan. Jase relives the graphic scene he endured over and over again as a kid when his Granny got ready to cook fried chicken. Dr. Ashley Lucas, a former ballet dancer and founder of the PHD Weight Loss Program, helps Al and Zach face their weight problems while perpetually thin Jase confesses to gorging on a Louisiana delicacy the night before. “Unashamed” Episode 1038 is sponsored by: https://meetfabric.com/unashamed — Join the thousands of parents who trust Fabric to help protect their family. https://tomorrowclubs.org/unashamed — Become a ministry partner & provide discipleship to 30 children in underserved communities!http://tomorrowclubs.org/unashamed — For only $30 per month, you'll be providing Christ-centered discipleship to 30 children in an underserved community. https://myphdweightloss.com — Find out how Al is finally losing weight! Schedule your one-on-one consultation today by visiting the website or calling 864-644-1900. Listen to Not Yet Now with Zach Dasher on Apple, Spotify, iHeart, or anywhere you get podcasts. — Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Randy Leavitt is a climbing pioneer, prolific route developer, pilot, and surfer. We talked about training on the Dune Cracks with Tony Yaniro, inventing the Leavittation offwidth technique, his journey from mountaineering to sport climbing, bolting Jumbo Love and other famous routes, why money equals freedom, his passion for surfing, reflections from almost drowning, aging gracefully, and much more.Rúngne:rungne.info/nugget

Prepare to be truly inspired by this episode as the man known for perhaps the greatest moustache in the cycling world, Ashton Lambie has a brilliantly candid chat with co-host Dave Towle about the many wonderful strings to his bow, being married to an astronaut and plenty more intriguing facts along the way. Dave chats Zwift Community Live with Eric, Nathan and Shane, and community member Joe Baxter drops in to talk about the moment he was told he had a brain tumour and how he coped from then until now, supported by the world of Zwift cycling.  Grab a brew and settle in!

Did you know that 63% of adults in the U.S. are living with hidden childhood trauma—and most don't even realize it?Unrecognized trauma doesn't just affect your mood—it can increase your risk of serious health issues like lung disease and heart disease, and even shorten your life expectancy by up to 20 years.That's why in this week's podcast episode, I am uncovering the Top 5 Hidden Signs of Childhood Trauma and how they show up in your life:Intellectual hypervigilance: Are you constantly overthinking or suspicious of others' motives?Emotional numbing or dissociation: Do you feel "checked out" from life or disconnected from your emotions?Emotional dysregulation: Are your moods on a constant rollercoaster, leaving you feeling exhausted and misunderstood?The glass ceiling effect: Does it feel like something is holding you back in your career, no matter how hard you work?Sex and libido issues: Do you feel ashamed or confused about your desires and relationships?With this episode, I aim to dive deep into these often-overlooked signs, uncovering how they silently shape your health, sabotage your relationships, and hold you back from living a truly fulfilling and joyful life. Don't miss out—Click here to listen now!P.S. Stay tuned—I'll also be sharing an upcoming episode on the 3-step system that helped me heal my own hidden trauma.

In this week's episode of Unlocked, Savannah Chrisley reads another letter she received from her mother, Julie Chrisley, who is currently serving a 7 year sentence in prison. Emotions are high as Savannah reads how Julie dealt with being transported across the country for her appeal hearing. Julie opens up about how hard the time she spent at Grady County jail was and how thinking about her family got through that very difficult time. Savannah also shares an important development in her fight for justice in the prison system.Thank you to our sponsors for supporting our show!- ONESKIN: Keep your skin healthier and looking your best with OneSkin! Use code UNLOCKED for an exclusive 15% off at https://oneskin.co today!- GDEFY: Visit https://www.gdefy.com today, and use code UNLOCKED for $20 off your first pair.- SONO BELLO: Give yourself the gift of a full body reset! Learn about ONE VISIT Micro Laser Fat Removal. Schedule your FREE consultation. Visit https://www.SonoBello.com/unlocked today!- HONEYLOVE: Treat yourself to the best shapewear on the market & save 20% OFF at https://www.honelove.com/UNLOCKEDLET'S BE SOCIAL:Follow Savannah Chrisley:Insta: (https://www.instagram.com/SavannahChrisley)TikTok: (https://www.tiktok.com/@SavannahChrisley)X: (https://www.x.com/_itssavannah_)Follow The Unlocked Podcast:Insta: (https://www.instagram.com/UnlockedWithSavannah)TikTok: (https://www.tiktok.com/@UnlockedWithSav)

Abigail's first pregnancy turned into a life-threatening birth experience with undetected gestational diabetes and a traumatic ICU stay. On top of that, she unexpectedly had to move homes just two weeks postpartum. Abigail quickly developed intense postpartum depression and struggled to make sense of what happened to her. She was sure she would never have kids again, but after therapy and healing, she and her husband found themselves wanting another baby three years later. Abigail became pregnant right away, and she knew this time would be different. This time, things would be better. From the meticulous monitoring to the candid conversations, Abigail felt heard and supported throughout her entire pregnancy. Her gestational diabetes was detected and very controlled. While a scheduled C-section seemed to be a logical choice, she knew her heart wanted a VBAC. She was able to go into spontaneous labor and pushed her baby girl out in just 13 minutes!How to VBAC: The Ultimate Prep Course for ParentsFull Transcript under Episode Details Meagan: Welcome to the show, everybody. We have our friend, Abigail, from California with us today. She is a 27-year-old stay-at-home mom with a 4-year-old daughter and a 7-month-old son. She experienced a very unfortunate, traumatic experience with her first which really left her not really sure that she wanted any more kids. She's going to dive more into her wild experience, but she had a COVID pregnancy. She had a lot of different stresses through the pregnancy, especially at the beginning– gestational diabetes, preeclampsia, and so many things with her first that really taught her a lot, and had a wild birth experience. Then the second time, she ended up getting gestational diabetes again, but did a lot of different things to improve her outcome like hiring a doula, getting a supportive provider, and all of that. We are going to turn the time over to her in just one moment, but I do want to quickly in place of the review share a couple of tips for gestational diabetes. If you guys have not heard about it so far, check out Real Food for Gestational Diabetes by Lily Nichols. It is absolutely incredible. It is less than 200 pages long. It is a fantastic read and filled with a lot of really great information and studies. She also talks about prenatals, so I wanted to remind everybody that we have a partnership with Needed who we just love and adore. We do have a promo code for 20% off. You can get your 20% off by using code VBAC20. Definitely check that out.Then we are going to be including a lot of things in our blog today like third-trimester ultrasounds, sizes of baby, and gestational diabetes so make sure to dive into the show notes later and check out what we've got. Okay, my darling. I'm so excited for you to share your stories today. I feel like there's part of your story that I want to point out too before you get going, and that is that sometimes you can plan the most ideal birth scenario, and I'm not going to talk about what this scenario is, but a lot of people are like, “Do this. Do this. Do this.” Sometimes you plan it, and then your care falls short or something happens and plans change. If you guys are listening, I just want you to dive in. As you are listening to Abigail share her stories, listen to how sometimes things change and what she did, and then what she did differently to have a different experience. Okay, Abigail. Abigail: Hello. First of all, I just want to say that I'm really happy to be here today. Thank you for having me today. Meagan: Me too. Abigail: Yeah, I guess let's just dive right in. Meagan: Yeah. Abigail: First thing is I am a stay-at-home mom, so my mom is out in the living room with my babies right now, and at this point, my son is 7-months-old, and we are having a really good time over here. I just want to start by saying that. Basically to start with my story, I got pregnant for the first time in January of 2020. Everybody knows what else happened in 2020. I was, I think, about 12 or 13 weeks pregnant when everything completely shifted. Everything started to shut down. There was a chance that I was going to get laid off of work which I did end up getting laid off of work about a week later. It was not a fun time. My husband and I had an apartment. We lived in a place we had just moved to. We had been there for about 3 years. We had a roommate, and everything was totally fine. Everybody worked full-time. I was working out regularly. We had a pretty chill life. Go to the farmer's market on the weekend. I was really excited when I found out I was pregnant. I was like, “Okay, yeah. We are going to bring a baby into this. Let's do it. I love what we're doing.” So again, everything completely shut down and shifted. Our roommate decided he wanted his own space, so he gave us a 30-day notice. We were stuck in a situation where they were raising our rent because our lease was up. We would have had to re-sign. It would have cost us more and everything, so we were looking at having to move because our roommate was moving out. It was all not a very fun time, so we decided to move back to where we were from, rent a room from a family member, and stay with them for the time being. They had a little bit of extra space for us. We thought it would be totally fine and everything. We moved when I was about 20 weeks pregnant. Up until that point, I had regular OB care at a regular office. I had done all of the blood work and everything and the ultrasounds and the anatomy scan and everything up until 20 weeks. When we moved, I decided, “Okay, I think I want to have the baby at home, especially now since the pandemic.” I don't know that I really wanted to go to the hospital, but I wasn't sure that I wanted to do that to begin with. I grew up in a community where home birth was pretty normal. My mom had my younger brother at home. Several of my friends were born at home and their siblings when we were younger. It was a pretty normal thing to me. I reached out to a team of midwives. I talked to them, and got everything set up. I started doing appointments with them. They were coming over to my house fairly frequently. It was pretty nice doing the regular blood pressure checks and the urine samples with the little sticks, and all of that stuff. When it came time for the gestational diabetes testing, I was like, “Okay, is this something I have to do?” I didn't have my insurance set up at that point or anything because we had just moved so we would have to pay out of pocket for it. I would have to go sit in some lab or office some place. Again, during COVID, while I was pregnant, I was like, “I don't know. If I don't have to do it, I don't want to. If I have to, I will. What are we doing here?” They were like, “Well, you're low-risk. These are the risk factors. If you don't want to do it, you don't have to. You just have to sign this form.”I was like, “Okay, cool. I'll sign the form. Seems easy enough.” I totally skipped the gestational diabetes testing. That was on me, but it wasn't on me at the same time because I don't feel like I was given proper informed consent. There was a team of three midwives plus a student, so a total of four that I was seeing. One of the midwives ended up getting switched out at about that point, so it ended up being the student, the same original two, and then one newer one. Everybody was really nice. They were coming over and checking on me and doing all of the things that I thought they were supposed to be doing. I was not weighing myself. We did not have a scale. Again, they didn't tell me that it is important to make sure that you're not gaining too much weight at a time or anything like that. What happened was, I started gaining a lot of weight, but I didn't really realize just how much weight I was actually gaining. I was like, “Oh, I'm pregnant.” I quit going to the gym. I can't even hardly do anything. It's hot out. It's summertime. I was pregnant from January to September, so the bigger I got, the hotter it got.I didn't do much, so I was like, “Whatever. I've gained some weight. It's not a big deal.” I was a pretty small person to start with. Just for reference, I'm 4'8”, and I was 95 pounds when I got pregnant initially, so really small. It started becoming concerning because toward the end of my pregnancy, and toward I guess not even the end, the beginning of my third trimester, I started getting really swollen. Like, really swollen. My feet and my legs up to my knees– not just my feet, but my calves and everything were pretty swollen. Toward the end of my pregnancy, I had swelling up to my thighs. I'm being told this is normal. I'm 23. I've never been pregnant before. I don't have any support groups or anything going because it's COVID. Nobody wants to talk to anybody or do anything. It was a little frustrating for me because they were like, “Just put your feet up. Soak your feet.” If I soaked my feet, they got more swollen. I was not taking proper care of myself either. I went from exercising and eating right and doing all of the things that you are supposed to do to sitting at home and eating a lot of fast food and not walking. I was not having a great time mentally either. We were living some place I didn't want to be living. It was all of it. I didn't think too much of it. Again, I'm like, “Well, I'm being told this is normal. I'm gaining some weight. It's fine.” At one point, one of my urine tests that they did came back positive for glucose, and they were like, “Well, what did you eat for breakfast?” When I told them, I was like, “I had some waffles. I had some orange juice,” and whatever else I had, they were like, “Oh, you just had some orange juice before you got here. That's fine.”I was like, “Okay.” They didn't think to check it again. I didn't think to get a second opinion or anything. At one point toward the end of my pregnancy, I had a blood pressure reading that I checked myself at home with the little wrist cuff. That was really elevated. It was the end of the day. I texted the midwife. I was like, “Hey, my blood pressure is really high.” She was like, “What did you do today?” I was like, “I didn't really do much. I ate this for lunch. I had some soda.” She was like, “Okay, well that's probably fine. Just rest and check it again in the morning.” I checked it again in the morning, and it was still relatively normal, so they didn't do anything. One of the midwives came over at one point and dropped off some herbs for me that they wanted me drinking like some tea or something like that because I was getting swollen. I was standing outside talking to her, and she was like, “Oh my god, I can see your feet swelling up while we are standing here. You need to go back inside and put your feet up.” Again, nobody thought anything of it. How four people missed all of this, I don't know. I feel kind of like the student may have been more concerned, but didn't really know how to say anything or anything, just looking back on the facial expressions she would give and things like that. I go into labor right at 40 weeks. I am planning a home birth. Everything is set up for that. I've got the tub at my house. We've done the home birthing class and how to get everything set up. We've done all that. There was no backup plan in place. They did not suggest that I have one. Again, I did not know any better at the time. I was told that if there was some kind of emergency, I would go to this hospital. That was as far as it went. I didn't have a backup bag ready. I didn't have a hospital bag ready. I didn't have anything planned. There was no, “Hey, this is what we watch out for. This is what you might go to the hospital for.”I go into labor at 3:00 AM. Honestly, contractions started, and they were immediately painful. I've never done this before. I'm like, “Okay well, maybe we're just starting out harder than I thought. That's fine. Maybe there's not going to be early labor.” I labored for a couple of hours. I was really uncomfortable, so I called the midwives. They came over. They checked, and they were like, “Okay, you're only at 2 centimeters, and this is seeming like early labor.” I'm like, “This really painful. I'm not having a good time. This does not feel okay at all.” They checked my blood pressure. My blood pressure was through the roof. They waited a little bit, checked it again, and it was even higher the second time. They were like, “Okay well, this is out of our care. You've got to go to the hospital now.” I'm like, “What do you mean I've got to go to the hospital? That's not part of the plan here. We don't even have a plan B or anything.” Through tears and contractions and everything, I was having contractions maybe every 10 minutes or so, 5-10 minutes. Somewhere around there, I don't remember exactly. I got a hospital bag ready. I got some clothes for the baby together. I got my phone charger, my toothbrush and everything, and we headed to the hospital. I sat in triage by myself for 4 hours because they did not have a bed available for me. They would not let my husband into triage with me because it was COVID. The entire time, I was so uncomfortable. They had me immediately start on blood pressure medication to try to get my blood pressure down. They started me on magnesium, and they told me that the magnesium was going to make me feel yucky which is the biggest lie I have ever been told by a nurse. I don't know if she just never had it or what, but I felt like you have the worst flu you've ever had. My whole body hurt. It made everything feel worse. I felt groggy. I felt sick. It was not fun at all. At that point, I think I got to the hospital at 11:00 AM. They didn't get me into a room until 3:00 or 4:00 that night. So at that point, I'd been in labor for 12 hours. I was still hardly dilated. The doctors, initially when I got there, said, “Your notes say you are only 2 centimeters. Why are you here?” I was like, “I don't know. I was told to be here. I was told that my blood pressure is high or whatever. I don't know. I don't want to be here.” They did all of the things. They ran all of the tests. The doctor comes back in and says, “You are severely preeclamptic. Why did you not get here sooner?” Meagan: So why are you here and okay, why weren't you here sooner?Abigail: Yeah. I was like, “I'm so confused. I don't want to be here.” I'm freaking out. I'm stressing hardcore. My blood pressure went down for a little bit, but it stayed really, really, really high. They put me on fluids and everything which of course, did not help with the swelling. They get me into a room and everything. Things are moving along. It's going fine. I was okay for a little bit, then it got to the point where my legs were so swollen that I felt like they were going to pop. My legs felt like balloons that were going to explode. They were trying to put compression boots on me and stuff in the bed. Every time I was having a contraction, I was trying to get up and get moving because it felt better to get up and move. They were taking the boots on and off. It was miserable. After, I think, 28 hours of labor at that point, I was like, “Okay. I would like an epidural, please. I really don't want to have to get out of bed. I can't do this. I want my legs up. I don't want any part of this.” They got me an epidural. I don't know exactly how many centimeters I was at that point, but things had not moved very far in 28 hours. The doctor kept pushing to try to break my water. I kept telling her, “No, thank you. I don't want that. It will break on its own. I would like to take a nap.” I took a nap. My water did break on its own. That was nice. The water was clear. Everything was fine. We are still moving. I have an epidural. It's working great. I'm laying in bed. My blood pressure was still high. The swelling was still bad, but other than that, everything was maintaining. We were fine.I continued laboring for a while. I was getting checked pretty frequently because the doctors were uncomfortable with the situation. Again, looking back, I realize why they would be uncomfortable with the situation. They kept checking me and trying to want to do stuff. I was on Pitocin at that point. They had started it at some point, I think, shortly before I got the epidural. I had been on that for a while. It had been from being okay to all of a sudden, I was not okay. I don't remember exactly what hour that happened. It was somewhere between probably 36-ish. I was dealing with some stressful stuff with some family members. I was not having a good time. My phone kept going off. I was just trying to rest. It was a miserable time. They said that I was getting a fever all of a sudden. They were like, “You're getting a fever. We're going to see what we can do.”  They tried to give me Tylenol to bring it down. They tried putting a cool rag on my face. They were trying to get me to eat ice. At that point, they had completely stopped letting me eat because initially when I got there, they were letting me eat a little bit, but that stopped. They wouldn't let me drink anything, so they were giving me ice chips and stuff. I started getting to the point where I was feeling really sick, like more sick than I already felt. They checked me again, and depending on which doctor did it, I was at a 6 or a 7 still. They finally called it. They were like, “You have an infection. You are not doing okay. This is not okay. You need to have a C-section now.” Crying, I was like, “Okay, fine. That's not what I want, but let's go.” They prepped me for the OR, got everything moving, got me back. By the time I got in there, it had been 38 hours. I had an epidural for about 12 of those hours, I guess. At that point, it wasn't working super well anymore. It was not working well enough that they could do the C-section, so they put in a spinal as well. I had both of those done. To my understanding, they are two different pokes. Again, I didn't want either initially, and I got both. I was not thrilled about that. I'm laying on the operating table. I was so thirsty. They wouldn't give me anything to drink. They kept giving me this moist sponge. They said that I couldn't suck on the sponge. I could moisten my mouth with it. They gave me some stuff to drink that said it was going to make it so I didn't throw up. I wasn't nauseous at all the entire time. I hadn't thrown up at any point at all. I was like, “I don't want this. I don't need it.” The stuff that they gave me tasted awful, and they wouldn't give me anything to rinse it down. My mouth is dry. I'm gagging from how dry my mouth is, and the stuff tastes bad. They have me strapped to the table. My arms are down. I just laid there crying. The C-section went fine. They got my baby out. She was okay. She was 7 pounds, 12 ounces. For somebody who is my size, I was like, “Wow. That's a really big baby.” That was surprising. So they get me sewn up and everything. They let me look at my placenta, and it was four times the size of any placenta I have ever seen. It was like a dinner plate sized, but a couple of inches thick, like really thick. I was like, “Okay well, that's really weird.” They moved me and the baby to recovery. My husband was with me. Everything was okay. Everything calmed down. We were okay now. We've got this. It's fine. Then all of a sudden, the nurse was like, “I don't like your bleeding.” This is the same nurse I had for two or three nights because at that point, I had been in labor for 46 hours. It was 46 hours by the time they took my baby out. I started labor initially on the 28th at 3:00 AM, and my baby was born on the 30th at 1:00 AM, so almost a full two days. She's like, “I don't like your bleeding.” I'm like, “Okay.” I'm really out of it. I'm not really paying attention. I'm trying to nurse my baby. I can hardly move. I'm uncomfortable. Next thing I know, there are more people coming in, more doctors coming in, more nurses coming in. They take the baby from me. They hand the baby to my husband, and they shove them out. I'm just screaming, “Please don't give my baby formula.” I don't know what's going on. I don't know where they're taking her. I was trying to nurse her, and I'm so confused now. Next thing I know, there are 10 people surrounding my bed. It's three doctors and seven nurses. I had one IV in my hand initially, or in my arm or wherever they put it. Next thing I know, I had two more IVs. There was one in my other arm and in my other hand. They put some pills up my backside, and I'm so confused what's going on at this point. I'm still numb from everything from the spinal and the epidural and everything, so I can't feel what's going on. She's pushing on my belly. She's changing the pads under me. Everyone is freaking out.Meagan: Wow. Abigail: I am fading in and out of consciousness. I don't know what's happening. My husband's freaking out. My blood pressure had dropped to 25/15 I think. Meagan: Whoa. Abigail: I was about to die. They finally got me stable. I don't really know what happened exactly. All I know is the next thing I know, I woke up and I was in the ICU. They wouldn't let my husband come see me. They wouldn't let me see my baby. I'm with a bunch of COVID patients and everything. They gave me two or three blood transfusions. They put a balloon in my uterus to apply counterpressure so that it would stop bleeding, and they had a bucket attached to it. I'm watching them just empty buckets of my blood. It was so scary. I'm laying in the ICU by myself, and the balloon in my uterus hurt so bad, like, so bad. I didn't end up moving. I laid there for the rest of that night, the entire next day, the whole next night, then I think they moved me the next day. It was a night and a half plus a whole day that I just laid there by myself. Meagan: Wow. So scary. Abigail: It was so scary. The nurses came in at one point and were trying. I think it was the lactation consultant maybe. They were trying to get me to pump and everything. I think I pumped once or twice, but I was not up for doing anything. If they didn't come in and sit me up, they didn't really do it. I finally get the balloon taken out because that was what I kept begging for. I was like, “Please take this out. It hurts so bad. The pain medications aren't helping.” I didn't want to give the pumped milk to my baby as it is because I was on so many pain medications and so many antibiotics and everything else. I get the balloon out finally, and I think they took it out that night then they moved me the next day. They moved me to high-risk maternity, and they let me take a shower and eat some food and stuff before they brought my baby back from the nursery because she was fine in the nursery. That was nice to be able to take a shower and wash off all of the blood. I was so covered in blood and everything. I looked at my C-section scar and everything for the first time, and I realized I had a reaction to the tape that was on it and stuff too, so my skin all around it was all irritated. All up and down my arms had been profusely poked and prodded because they were checking my blood every four hours because of the infection and stuff. Depending on the lab tech's skill and everything, it was not going well for some of them. They kept having to poke me. The IVs weren't working for them to take blood from or something like that so they just kept having to poke me more. Again, I was having reactions to some of the tape, so my whole arms are just completely raw and everything. I was still very swollen. I was very, very, very swollen still. They had compression socks and stuff on at this point, not boots at least. They finally bring my baby to me, and then we ended up spending three days in high-risk maternity, so total, that was two days in labor, almost two days in the ICU, and three days in the high-risk maternity. Total, I spent seven days in the hospital. I get home, and they had me on blood pressure medication for a few weeks until I think my six-week appointment when I followed up, and then my blood pressure was back to normal, so I was able to quit taking the blood pressure medication and stuff. I dropped 30 pounds instantly because it was all of the swelling that just came off. I had still gained a lot of weight, but it a huge chunk of it was swelling which is so bad. It was finally over. I was settled. I'm in bed with my baby, and then the family member we were living with decided that they didn't want us living there anymore, so at three weeks postpartum, we had to move. I had only been home from the hospital for two weeks at that point. I didn't know what was going on. I didn't want to be around the situation. My husband was dealing with it. I ended up going on a road trip with my grandma to go stay with a different family member out-of-state just to make sure my baby wasn't anywhere near anything that was going on. Three weeks after a C-section and almost dying, I was driving and doing a whole bunch of other stuff– going out, walking around, and trying to put jeans on. I couldn't figure out why my clothes didn't fit. I didn't realize just how big I had gotten. It was not a fun time. It was about five days out of town, then I moved into a different family member's house temporarily where I was completely isolated by the people that I was living with. They did not understand what I was going through. They thought that I was choosing to be difficult intentionally, so that created additional problems. I ended up getting pretty bad postpartum depression which is really not a surprise. I still didn't understand what had happened to me. I still didn't understand why I had almost died. I still didn't understand. I didn't know if I had done something wrong. I didn't know what was going on. I spent a lot of time really upset over the fact that everything went wrong, and I didn't know why. Life was falling apart around me. I was not doing okay. It turned into really bad postpartum depression pretty quickly. My husband and I got our own apartment when my baby was four month's old. I was like, “Okay, things are finally going to get settled. Things are going to be okay now.” It did not settle. My depression got worse, and I didn't even know what to do. I was eating a lot because I was like, “I'm breastfeeding. I need to eat.” I basically just sat at home, didn't do anything but eat and nurse my baby. I was very thankful I was able to successfully breastfeed my baby after everything that happened to me. All of the nurses at the hospital were surprised about that and stuff. Meagan: Yeah, with the amount of blood loss and everything, that's pretty rare. It's pretty rare. Abigail: Yeah. I never ended up giving my baby a bottle or anything because I was so scared that if I tried to give her a bottle or something that it would mess up my breastfeeding, and that was the only thing that had gone right. I was doing okay for a little while, I thought, but it was not okay. I was really not okay. I was very, very sad. I was fully convinced for a period of time that they should have let me die at the hospital. I was fully convinced that the doctor did me a disservice by trying so hard to save me. Meagan: I'm so sorry. Abigail: Yeah. I finally started therapy. I started trying to get up and do more and not eat so much and get moving. I think finally around the time my daughter was a year or a year and a half, I started to feel a little bit better, and things slowly did start to get a little bit better for me, but I was fully convinced that I did not want more kids. I was like, “I am never going through that again. I do not want another C-section. I don't know what happened to me, so obviously, I would have to have another C-section because we don't even know what went wrong.” It took me until my daughter was almost three. She was about to be three when all of a sudden, my mindset shifted, and I was getting mad at myself for feeling like I wanted another baby because I was like, “I don't want another baby. Of course, I don't want another baby. I made that very clear.” We got rid of all of the baby stuff. I told everybody I wasn't having more. What was wrong with me? I was fighting internally with myself because I wanted another baby, but I did not want another baby. It was insane. I kept it all to myself. I didn't say anything. All of a sudden, my husband was like, “I think we should have another baby. I was like, “What are you talking about? You're insane.” He was like, “No, really. I think we should have another baby.” I was like, “You shouldn't have said that because I want another baby.” Meagan: Yeah. I have been actually thinking the same. Yeah. Abigail: Yeah. I was pretty surprised that I got pregnant right away. Literally, within a couple weeks, I was pregnant. It was a good thing and a bad thing because it didn't give me a chance to overthink it, but also, it was like, “Oh no, I haven't even had a chance to think about this. This is definitely what's happening.”I started going to the doctor right at five weeks. They started doing ultrasounds right at five weeks. They were checking me for everything every time, all of the time. I had so much anxiety. I made that very clear to them. I think that's part of the reason that they checked everything all of the time and were trying to be more reassuring. They did ultrasounds at almost every appointment. Most people don't even get an ultrasound until 12 or 20 weeks. Meagan: And then that's the only one. Abigail: I had four of them before I even went for my anatomy scan. They were trying to watch everything and make sure everything was fine too because again, they didn't do my care last time. This OB place did my follow-up care afterward. They saw the aftermath of everything, and they were concerned and stuff. That's what we were dealing with. I was dealing with some nausea, so they gave me some pills for that. Come to find out, one of the side effects of one of the medications they gave me was anxiety. I was fighting a losing battle with myself because I was taking these pills for the nausea. I wasn't eating because I was anxious, and I wasn't eating because I was nauseous, then I was getting more anxious. It was a rough first 20 weeks I would say. Then I did start feeling better, thankfully, so I was able to start eating and stuff again. Once I felt better, I was eating ice cream and all of those things that I wanted and all of that. It was fine. I was doing fine. I was doing all of my appointments and stuff, then it comes up for my gestational diabetes testing. The doctor says, “You need to do this,” and immediately, I was like, “Yes, please. I need to do that because that's one of the things I didn't do last time. I need to do everything to make sure I'm good.” I need to backtrack a minute, I'm so sorry. At my first intake appointment at five weeks when I met with one of the– they're nurses, but it's not the nurse who actually checks you and stuff. They have an office at the OB's office, and they check in, and they ask, “Do you have transportation for your appointments? Do you need help with anything? Do you have access to food? Are you in a safe relationship?” I let them know what had happened previously with me, and she was like, “Oh, well then you might be interested in this. This is something new your insurance covers. You could get a doula if you wanted since it sounds like you wanted to have a more natural experience last time.”Meagan: That's awesome. Abigail: Yeah. Immediately, I was like, “Hell yeah. Let's do that.” I didn't have a doula last time. Again, last time was COVID. I was already trying to pay for the midwives. It wasn't something I thought about one, because I thought I was having a home birth with a couple of midwives. I didn't think I needed a doula. Also, I didn't fully understand what they were and the actual extent of the benefits of them. I was like, “Yeah, totally.” The first thing I did when I got home was call. They were like, “Yeah, we take your insurance. We can get you set up. We're taking new clients. Let's get you in for an appointment.” I started seeing a doula sometime in my first trimester. I don't remember exactly when, but I remember I pulled up the office and I got out. I was like, “This can't be right. This is too nice. There's no way my insurance covers this.” I was shocked at the care I received from my doula service. I'm just going to go ahead and give them a quick shoutout just because they are amazing, but it's Haven for Birth in Sacramento, California, and they do amazing work for a lot of different things. I still attend lactation meetings and stuff with them monthly. Meagan: That's awesome.Abigail: It's such a great team of people. I got the doulas that they set up for me because there are two of them. There's a main one and a backup one. My main doula's name was Heidi, and the backup doula's name was Francine. They were both so sweet and wonderful. Heidi has been doing doula work for a good amount of time. She owns a chiropractic business and Haven. She's the main one, and she's the one who has dealt with higher-risk pregnancies and things like that, so she was my main source of support and throughout everything. I would text her if I needed something. She was so reassuring. She was like, “Yep. You can totally have a VBAC if that's what you want to do.” I was like, “Really? I can do that, okay. I'm going to talk to the OB about it.” The OB was like, “Yeah. It's completely up to you. As long as you are fine and we watch everything, that's fine.” I really did feel like they were supportive. It wasn't like, “Well, if you are okay, then you can.” It was like both of the OBs that I had seen, one of them was a guy and one of them was a girl, and both of them were like, “Yeah, as long as we keep everything in check, you are totally fine. I don't see why you couldn't.”I started to feel a little more confident in that. I had a lot of anxiety about it and for a couple of weeks, I did contemplate scheduling a C-section just to ease my own anxieties, but I didn't feel right with that choice. I really didn't. I was like, “I need to try.” It was tough, though, because I was like, “I don't know how I'm going to deal with the feelings of trying and not succeeding,” so that was the struggle of, “Do I want to just have a C-section that way? I get what I want no matter what,” but I didn't feel like I wanted to do that. I worked really, really, really hard to get my VBAC is basically what ended up happening. Back to where I was, I get my gestational diabetes testing done, and the first-hour one comes back really high. I'm like, “Okay, that's concerning.” I texted my doula about it. She was like, “It's okay. You're going to do the three-hour one. You'll probably pass the three-hour one, but even if you don't, it'll be fine.”I failed the three-hour one really bad. My fasting number was fine, but the rest of the numbers were very elevated, not even just a little bit. I was like, “Oh, okay.” This is all starting to make sense. I had a lot of anxiety initially about what I could or couldn't eat because I didn't feel the greatest, and I was letting myself eat what sounded good to make sure that I was eating. It was a rough week initially when I got that, then it took them a minute to get me the referral in for the program, the Sweet Success program where I was actually able to talk to nurses and dieticians there. Once I finally got in with them, I met with them a few times throughout the end of my pregnancy. I did feel very supported by them. They were very nice. The dietician was willing to meet with me one-on-one instead of a group setting because I was having issues with eating and not wanting to eat and feeling very concerned that I was going to hurt myself or hurt the baby.They did a very good job making sure that I was cared for. We completely changed up my diet. I started walking after every meal. I started checking my blood sugar four times a day, so first thing in the morning, then after breakfast, after lunch, and after dinner. I basically, immediately after eating, would get up and do the dishes or clean up the food I had made or pick up the house or start some laundry or something so that I was getting up and moving. Only a couple of times, there was only once or twice where my blood sugar numbers were higher than they really wanted by more than a point or two. I did a really good job keeping those in check with what I was doing and watching what I was eating very closely and monitoring my portion sizes and realizing what I could and couldn't eat. Once I got to the point of 36 or 37 weeks or whatever where they were like, “Okay, this is the plateau. It's not going to get worse than this,” and I realized I was able to keep it under control and things like that, I would let myself have a couple of bites of a cookie here and there. It wouldn't spike my blood sugar or anything because I was doing everything I needed and that made me feel really nice because I was able to eat the stuff I really liked as long as that was within reason.We met with the doula multiple times. She came over and did a home visit at 37 weeks. I had been having Braxton Hicks contractions from the time I was 19 weeks because we got COVID. We got RSV, and we got a cold. We got a cold. We got COVID, and we got RSV. Meagan: Oh my goodness. Abigail: Yeah. That was the whole first half of my pregnancy along with dealing with nausea and everything else. I found out I was pregnant the beginning of September. We got a cold in October. I got COVID in November, then in December, we got RSV, and my daughter who was three at that point spent five days in the hospital, so I spent five days in the hospital right next to her dealing with RSV while I was pregnant. I feel like the coughing kickstarted Braxton Hicks contractions almost because at that point, I started having them pretty regularly. From 19 weeks on, I had tightenings all the time. Some days, they would be worse than others, but because I was so active, it definitely– I never got diagnosed with irritable uterus or anything, but I think that's what it was because it would get really irritable when I would do pretty much anything, and I was doing things all of the time. At 35 weeks, my contractions started getting fairly intense-ish. They weren't painful at all, but it was every 3-5 minutes, I was contracting. I drove myself to the hospital. I was like, “I'm fine. I'm not concerned.” I didn't bother my husband or my doula or anything. I let her know I was going, but I was like, “Don't worry about it.” They hooked me up. They checked me and everything. they were like, “You're hydrated. We don't need to give you fluids or anything.” They were like, “How are you feeling? You've got to tell us if they hurt or not because we can see them on the monitor, but you've got to tell us how you're feeling.” I was like, “I just feel annoyed. They tighten up, and it's uncomfortable when they do, but nothing hurts. I'm annoyed.” They were like, “Okay, let's check you.” I was still completely closed with no baby coming down. So they gave me a single pill to stop them and sent me home. It worked. It slowed them down for the rest of the night, then they kicked back up to their normal here and there the next day. But for the next couple of weeks, I kept it fairly easy. If I noticed I started I was having more of them, I would try to go lay down. I was able to have my baby shower at 36 weeks which was wonderful because I had not had a baby shower for my first baby because of COVID. I feel like 36 weeks was almost pushing it because my family had asked if we wanted to have it later to have somebody else be able to join us and I was like, “No, no. Please don't push it later. I don't trust that.” It was like I knew that he was going to come just a little early, but I was doing all of the things and still having the regular Braxton Hicks contractions and everything. They were doing multiple growth scans on my baby because he started measuring small at 28 weeks, I think. At his 28-week scan, they noted that his kidneys were slightly enlarged, so they wanted to follow up on that. They followed up on that at 28 weeks. His kidneys were completely fine. We never had another incident with that, but they noticed he was measuring a little smaller so they started doing regular checks. By the end of my pregnancy, I was having a growth scan every week, so they went from, “Let's check you in six weeks. Let's check you in four weeks. Let's check you every two weeks. Let's check you in a week.” They noticed he was measuring small, and he continued measuring small. Meagan: They were regressing, or he was staying on his own growth pattern but small?Abigail: He was growing but not a lot. Meagan: Okay, yeah. He was staying on his own pattern. Abigail: They didn't want him to drop below the 10th percentile, and if they did, they were going to be concerned. He did get right to the 9th or 10th percentile, so they did start to get concerned. They labeled him IUGR. They were doing non-stress tests on me twice a week. Basically, by the end of my pregnancy, I was seeing the OB, the place for the non-stress tests, the gestational diabetes program, the place for the ultrasounds and growth scans, a therapist, a hematologist because I ended up having to have iron infusions and B12 injections, and the doula's office, so seven places. Almost all of them wanted to see me every week. Meagan: Whoa. Abigail: I was running around, super active towards the end of my pregnancy. I was still taking my daughter out and doing all of the things with her as well. I noticed after my baby shower at 36 weeks that my feet were just a little puffy, and I was like, “Huh. That's funny.” It hit me all of a sudden. I was like, “My toes are kind of pudgy.” I'm 36, almost 37 weeks pregnant, and this is the most swollen I have gotten. It was not up my legs. It was not even in my whole feet. It was my toes and the top of my feet, not even my ankles. They were the tiniest bit puffy. I had this moment of clarity where I was like, “How did nobody notice that something was so wrong with me?” I was shocked because I'm looking at myself and I had gained a total, by the end of my pregnancy with my son, of 25 pounds, and that was it. With my daughter, by the end of it, I had gained 70 pounds. Again, how did nobody notice? I am shook. I thought on that for a long time. I'll come back to that, but I thought on that for so long. I ended up emailing the midwives who had provided me care. I was having a day. I went off on multiple people that day. I was not having it, and I emailed them, and I sent them a four-paragraph email about how they let me down. They should have known better. Somebody should have noticed something was wrong. They should have asked for a second opinion. It was ridiculous. I was shook that they didn't push harder for gestational diabetes testing, and all of the things because clearly at this point, I realized that my blood sugars being in control has made all of the difference. Not knowing, you can't do what you need to do which is why I'm such a big advocate for informed consent and gestational diabetes testing. I know sometimes I see people saying that they want to skip it because they are fine. I had zero of the actual risk factors, and I still had it. I'm just putting that out there. That's my main thing for this. Definitely get checked, and stay active, and watch your blood sugars because it's a really, really serious thing. I literally almost died. Sorry, I keep jumping around. My son was measuring small, so they started doing all of the tests and everything, and they couldn't find anything wrong. They were like, “Your cord dopplers look great. The blood flow looks great. Nothing specifically is measuring small. His head is not measuring smaller than the rest of him.” He was very, very, very low in my pelvis. I was waddling from 32 weeks on. He was low the entire time. I could feel him moving regularly. He was super active. I felt confident in myself. I felt safe. I felt good. they were telling me he was fine. Everything was looking fine. My fluid levels were looking good. My non-stress tests were always good. They make you sit for a minimum of 20 minutes, and if they don't see what they need to see in 20 minutes, then you need to stay longer. I never had to stay longer than 20 minutes. It was always in and out. He was always moving. His heart rate was always good. When they started mentioning induction at 37 weeks, I was like, “I don't want to be induced. I don't. There's really no reason.” They were like, “Well, he's measuring small. Your other baby last time was so much bigger. He is so small. This is such a concern.” I was like, “But I think there was something wrong with me and my baby last time. I don't think she should have been that big for me.” I thought that was the problem. I tried explaining that to them that I think they had it backward. They should have been concerned about how big my last baby was because they didn't check my blood sugar when I was in the hospital or anything. They didn't check it. Everything was fine. I was feeling fine. I was having pretty regular Braxton Hicks still. I was convinced I was going to have him early. I told him that. “I will have him early, and you're not going to have to induce me. I promise you. You're not going to have to induce me.” I told the doula that I promised the doctors and the specialists that I was not going to have to be induced. She was on my side. She was like, “Okay. We can try some midwives' brew if we get to that point. We'll talk about it.” I didn't end up getting to that point, thankfully. I had another scan at 37 weeks and 36 weeks. At 37 weeks, the doctor was like, “Okay, well, I specifically want to see you next week. I want you to come out to my other office next week because I specifically want to see you. I don't want you to see the other doctors. I want to follow up with you.” I was like, “Fine. I'll drive to Rosedale. No problem.” It wasn't farther than the other office I had been going to. I didn't get that far. I went into labor at 37 and 6. It had been a normal day. I had taken my daughter to the jumping place and had gone to the grocery store. I messed up when I went to the grocery store and the jumping place. I parked too far out, and I didn't think it through. I jumped near the jumping door, not the grocery door. Walking in was super close, but then I had to walk all the way back carrying my groceries. The carts didn't go out that far or anything. I'm like, “Oh my gosh. This is so heavy.” I'm still having Braxton Hicks the whole time. I'm feeling fine. I haven't had any kind of mucus plug activity or none of that. There was no swelling in my feet or legs. My blood pressure had been good. I checked it regularly. My blood sugar had been good. I had checked it regularly. I get home, and I'm like, “Man, I'm tired.” I got up, and I kept doing laundry and stuff. My husband gets home from work. He's like, “Hey, do you want to go out to dinner? We can go to the restaurant up the street.” I'm like, “Yeah, it's a beautiful day out. It's the beginning of May. That's a great idea.”It's a 3-minute walk from my house to the restaurant. I'm not kidding. About halfway there, I stopped, and I was like, “Oh. Well, that one was a little more uncomfortable than they have been. Okay. I actually felt that.” It felt like a bad period cramp, but also tightening with the Braxton Hicks at the same time. I was like, “I'm fine.” I kept walking. We get to dinner, and I notice at that point, I'm having mild contractions every 10 minutes. We ate food. I had sushi, and I know that rice spikes my blood sugar, so I try not to eat too much of it, but I was like, “You know what? I feel like I'm going to have them. I just need to make sure that I eat.” I ate my dinner. We walked back home. It was still about every 10-12 minutes that I was having mild contractions. We went about the evening as normal. I put my daughter to bed and stuff. I took a shower. My husband and I were watching some TV. I was bouncing on the ball. I wasn't really telling my husband that I was super uncomfortable at that point yet. It hit all of a sudden. It was 11:00 PM. At this point, it was 6:00 PM when I felt the first slightly uncomfortable contraction. It's now 11:00 PM. I'm like, “Okay. This is actually starting to get a little bit more uncomfortable.” I got up, and I paced around the living room. My husband was like, “Uh-oh. We should probably go to bed.” Yeah, we should probably go to bed. That was a good idea. We went to bed, and I did not sleep. I think I slept for about seven minutes because at that point, it went to seven minutes, not 10 minutes. I started timing them on my phone. I texted my doula. I made sure I had all of my stuff ready just to be safe. I made sure the house was picked up. I tried to sleep. I let the doula what was going on. She was like, “Don't worry about timing them, just get some rest.” I was like, “I'm not trying to time them, but every time I have one, I look up and I see the clock. This is happening.” She was like, “Okay, well I'll start getting up, and I'll be ready to head over if you need me. I want you to take a shower.” It took me a good 45 minutes or a half hour or something like that to actually get from hanging around my house to getting in the shower because I started shaking really bad, and I was starting to have contractions pretty quick together. They started getting closer and closer together. My husband ended up texting her at that point, “Hey, she's int he shower. I think contractions are getting closer together. They are two minutes apart at this point. You should probably head over.” She gets here pretty quickly. My daughter is still asleep. At that point, my doula was like, like, “Yeah, I think you're in active labor. We should think about heading to the hospital.” I'm only 10 minutes from the hospital, but my daughter needed to get picked up. I put my bag in the car. We call family. I get my daughter picked up. She hadn't heard anything. She hadn't noticed I was in labor. I wasn't being necessarily loud, but I wasn't also being super quiet or anything. She gets picked up. She's mad she's awake. It's 2:00 AM. We get ready to go, and by the time we get down the stairs, because I live in an upstairs apartment, so I'd been pacing the whole upstairs in my apartment and everything, I was super afraid my water was going to break in the car so I put on a Depends because I was like, “I'm not going to have to clean that up later because I'm going to be the one cleaning it up later, and I don't want to have to deal with that.” My doula was like, “Chris, get her a bag in case she throws up in the car. Let's go.” She tried checking my blood pressure, but I kept moving and stuff, so we couldn't get an accurate reading which made me that much more anxious. I was so afraid that by the time I got there, everything was going ot go bad. I had convinced myself that it was fine, but there was this nagging voice in my head that was like, “No, no, no, no, no. Everything went wrong last time, so surely, you are going to die this time.” I was like, “Nope. I am fine. Everything has been fine. They are aware. They have blood on deck for me. It's going to be okay. I've got this.” We get to the hospital. It's 3:00 in the morning. It's fairly quiet. We parked in the parking garage which was across the street. We walked through the parking garage. We take the elevator. We take the walk bridge across. We get into the hospital, check in with security and everything. they were like, “Oh, sweetie, do you want a wheelchair?” My doula was like, “No, no, no. She's fine. She will walk.” I'm like, “Yeah, okay Heidi. Walking is a great idea.” I mean, that's what she's there for. It's fine that I kept walking, honestly, because we had to walk from one side of the hospital to the elevator to take the special elevator that goes to the 6th floor. We're about halfway to the elevator, and I'm like, “Oh, I think my water just broke.” My water broke walking into the hospital which was that much more convenient. We get in. We get checked into triage. The nurse is so nice, and she was like, “It's okay if you want to give me a hug,” because they wouldn't let my husband or my doula in at first. I gave the nurse a hug. She was so nice. They were like, “We need a urine sample.”At that point, basically, from the time labor started, I couldn't pee. That was an issue, so they were like, “Don't worry about it. It's fine. Let's get you back on the bed. Let's check on you, and see how you are doing.” They said I was a 4 or a 5 depending on who checked and who assessed.They asked me about pain medication and stuff, and I was like, “I'll get back to you. I'm doing okay.” Contractions are about every 2-3 minutes at this point. My water had broken on the way in. They tried doing one of the swabs to check it was my water and not that you peed, and the nurse was like, “I'm not even going to send this in. It's fine. I know that it's your water.” They got me in pretty quickly. By the time I got into a room, I was like, “I would like some pain medication please.” They were like, “Okay, do you want an epidural? Do you want IV medication?” I remembered when I was in labor with my daughter, the nurse had initially offered me what was called a walking epidural, so I asked because I remembered declining that with my daughter. I was like, “No, no, no. I don't want to do anymore walking. That's the point. I don't want walking. no walking.” This time, I was like, “That actually sounds like I wanted to know more about that.” I asked the nurse more about it. She was like, “It's still an epidural. It's put in your back the same. It's just different medication. It's lower doses or different medication or whatever it is. It's going to provide some pain relief, but you're not going to be numb. You're still going to feel everything.” I was like, “Honestly, that sounds like what I would like. That sounds like it's a really good idea.” I was having a very hard time taking a deep breath. I was having a very hard time relaxing because I was so afraid that something was going to go wrong. At that point, my blood pressure was fantastic. Everything had been normal. No protein in my urine, no swelling, no high blood sugars, nothing. I was like, “Okay, this is going to be fine. I'm going to be fine.” I felt a little weird about asking for pain medication because I was adamant that this time, I was going to do it without it, but they called the anesthesiologist. He comes in, and he says, “Okay, are you sure you want the walking epidural? That's definitely not going to get you were you want to be pain-wise.” I was a little ticked off, but I was like, “Just get me what I asked for, please. If I change my mind, I will tell you.” That's the thing. If you change your mind, all they have to do is switch up your medication. It's not continuous with what I got. It's just a bolus of medication, and the little thing is taped on your back. You're not actually hooked up to medication or anything, but if I wanted to be, all they had to do was hook it up. I was like, “I'm fine. I don't need that. Thanks, dude.” They get me that, and they made me stay in bed for the first hour just to make sure I was okay and my blood pressure was fine and everything. My blood pressure was fine. Everything stayed fine. My blood sugar was a little high at this point. It was two points over the max where they want it to be. My husband ran down to the gift shop and got me some trail mix, cheese, and meat things. I ate that. They checked my blood sugar in a little bit, and it was back to a healthy, happy, normal range, so they weren't concerned. I was like, “I ate rice the night before, guys. That's all it was. You checked my blood sugar in the middle of the night after I had rice. Of course, it's going to be a little high.” At this point, it's 4:00 AMish. I stayed in bed for the first hour. My doula was like, “Okay, let's get you out of bed. Let's get you moving.” I was out of bed almost the whole time. I did spend a little bit more time in bed at one point. I had the initial bolus of medication. That was all I had, so at this point, I can feel the contractions are getting stronger, and I can also feel that the medication is also starting to wear off. It started getting more intense. I was on the toilet for a minute. I was still having the issue where I still could not go pee. My doula kept feeding me water after every contraction, so they were keeping an eye on that. My doula was keeping an eye on that and stuff. It got to where it was 8:00 AM, I think, so at this point, I had been in labor for a total of– from the time contractions actually started being painful at midnight to 8:00 AM– 8 hours. I was on the side of the bed leaned over the bed. They had it at my height. My husband was rubbing my back. The nurses were there taking care of me and making sure I was good. All of a sudden, she's like, “Okay, honey, I think it's time to get you back in the bed.” I was like, “What?” She was like, “We've got to get you back in the bed. With the noises you're making, and squatting down, we've got to get you back in bed.” With every contraction, I was bearing down. Meagan: And they just didn't want you pushing standing up, type of thing? Abigail: I think they wanted to check me and see how I was doing and everything. They had me on continuous monitoring, which initially I didn't really want, but up until that point, I hadn't minded the monitors. It was just at that point because I kept moving, and I was so sweaty. I was so sweaty. My IV kept slipping off. The monitors kept slipping off. My gown was drenched. My hair was drenched. They kept re-taping my IV, and I was like, “Can you please just take the IV out? It's bugging me.” At that point, the IV was somehow more painful than the labor. I was coping with labor, but I kept feeling the IV in my arm because they kept having to poke it and mess with it and stuff because it wasn't staying in. They ended up leaving it in which I was annoyed with, but I was in and out of at that point.They get me back in the bed, and they check me. They're like, “Okay. You're already starting to push. Let's get the doctor in here. Let's do this.”I'm on the bed. I've got the squat bar. I'm up on the bed on the squat bar. I'm kneeling in a lunge position. I've got one knee up and one knee down. Every contraction, they were having me switch my knees which started getting really uncomfortable for me. I felt so heavy, and I was falling asleep in between each contraction it felt like. I wasn't all the way there, but they ended up saying that my son's heart rate was dropping just a little bit, and they were like, “Okay, let's get him out. Let's move this along.” They pulled the squat bar, and they had me on my back. The bed was propped up. I was upright, and they had me holding my own legs. I was having a hard time because I was so sweaty that my hands kept slipping off the back of my thighs. They were like, “Okay, you need to push. Let's push.” I wasn't really listening to them. They were trying to do coached pushing, but if I didn't feel like it, I just wasn't doing what they were telling me. I was more listening to my doula than anything else because I felt like I trusted her and what she was saying more than anything else. I told them, I was like, “I feel like it's pulling up. I feel like it's pulling up.” They were like, “Okay, lower your legs a little bit.” It was really nice that I was able to feel everything. I put my legs down a little bit, and that helped a little bit. I don't know exactly how many pushes it was. I don't know if anybody counted, but it ended up being 13 minutes that I pushed for from the time they got me in the bed and were like, “Okay, you're pushing,” to “Let's get you on your back. Give a couple good pushes.” I think it was two pushes once I was on my back and he was out. Meagan: That's awesome. Abigail: He came right out. I had a small right inner labial tear, no perineal tears, and then I don't think I actually tore up, but I noticed I was sore afterward up toward my urethra, but they ended up only giving me one stitch on my right labia. That was fine. They did numbing shots and everything for that, and I could feel the numbing shots and everything, and I didn't like that. It's uncomfortable, but it was fine. I felt fine. I felt good. They put him right onto my abdomen because his cord was so short that they couldn't put him any further up. I wish they would have waited just a little longer to cut his cord, but they were like, “He's hanging out down here where we need to be,” because his cord was so short, which makes sense that he was head down the entire pregnancy and didn't move. He stayed right there. He flipped and rotated. Meagan: Transverse. Abigail: Sideways. He would put his butt back sometimes and toward the side sometimes, but that's all he would do. His head was in my pelvis the entire time. He comes out. Once they cut his cord, they moved him up to my chest and everything. They got me cleaned up and everything. Everything was fine. I got my golden hour, and he didn't want to nurse right away, but he was fine. They were taking bets like, “Does he look like he's over 6 pounds or what?” He ended up only being 5 pounds, 5 ounces. Meagan: Tiny. Abigail: He was a little, tiny guy. He was barely 18 inches. I had him right at 38 weeks, so he was a little small. He was closer to the size of a 35-week baby. Meagan: Mhmm, and he had IUGR. Abigail: I don't think there was anything wrong with him. I think I'm a very small person, and I think my first baby was too big because when I look at pictures, my daughter's head was coned off to the side, and I know that she did not have room to move around in there. She was stuck where she was stuck. Meagan: That would mean it was asynclitic probably. Her head was coming down wrong. Abigail: Yeah, which is probably why it hurt so bad. I know that now, initially, it started even with early labor. I don't think that even once I had an epidural with her, they were using the peanut ball. They were changing my positions. They were doing all of the things, and she wasn't coming down any further. She wasn't moving, and I wasn't going past a 7. I think that she was too big which I think is from having unchecked gestational diabetes. Even though she was considered an average-sized baby. I'm not an average-sized person. I'm really, really, really small. Me having a 5-pound, 5-ounce baby seems about right.He came out perfectly healthy. There was nothing wrong with him. His blood sugars were good. His blood pressures were good. Everything was great. And now at seven months, he's still slightly on the smaller side, but he went from being in the 2nd or 3rd percentile or whatever he was born into all the way to about the 20th. He's almost caught up. He's healthy. He's chunky. There wasn't actually anything going on with him. I think that says a lot to the fact that I'm just really small and my first baby was the result of an unhealthy pregnancy. I didn't have a postpartum hemorrhage. I didn't need any extra medication. I didn't need Pitocin. I didn't end up getting a full epidural. When they asked me about my experience, I made sure to tell them that the anesthesiologist should choose his words more wisely. It went well. I waited two months afterward to see how I was feeling and everything, and I do not have postpartum depression. Meagan: Good. Abigail: No more anxiety than what I regularly deal with. I have had a great time. Everything is just completely different, and my son is already seven months old, and I am already at a point where I'm like, “I want another baby.” I don't know if I'll actually have another one or not. I mean, there are financial reasons to consider and actually giving birth to another baby and raising another human. It's not just a baby. It's a whole other life. It's a lot, but I have baby fever already. I would absolutely do it again, and I just had him. Meagan: Oh, that makes me so happy. I am so happy that you had such a better experience that was more healing and positive and has left you having a better postpartum for sure. Abigail: It was a completely different experience. I mean, night and day. I'm just trying to make sure that I didn't miss anything. I think the only thing that ended up being different was like I mentioned, I couldn't really go pee. I did end up having to have a catheter at the end of my labo

Thanks for tuning in to 98.ATWWD where Christmastime is here and so is Episode 409. Today Em brings us the story of the haunted Sword Gate House in Charleston. Then Christine covers the heavy case of the murder of Erik Poltorak. And are you all as obsessed with gift wrapping rooms as us? Let us know! …and that's why we drink! Love our banter and want to hear more? Join us on Patreon for our weekly Yappy Hour bonus episodes on Mondays every week! Visit https://www.patreon.com/ATWWDPodcast to join today! ______________________ Control Body Odor ANYWHERE with @lumedeodorant and get 15% off with promo code DRINK at http://lumepodcast.com/DRINK #lumepodGift luxury this holiday season without the luxury price tag. Go to http://quince.com/drink for 365-day returns, plus free shipping on your order. Audible. There's more to imagine when you listen. Go to http://audible.com/DRINK and discover all the year's best waiting for you. DraftKings is offering a warm welcome to new players with $100 INSTANTLY IN CASINO CREDITS with just a $10 wager. Plus, EVERYONE can get in on the action with a holiday reward every week! So, sign up with code ATWWD because the holiday cheer is here! Only on DraftKings Casino. Gambling problem? Call 1-800-GAMBLER. In Connecticut, help is available for problem gambling call 888-789-7777 or visit CCPG.org. Please play responsibly. 21+. Physically present in Connecticut, Michigan, New Jersey, Pennsylvania, West Virginia only. Void in Ontario. Eligibility restrictions apply. New customers only. Opt-in required. Casino Credits are non-withdrawable and expire in 168 hours. Terms at http://casino.draftkings.com/promos Exclusive $35-off Carver Mat at AuraFrames.com. Use code DRINK at checkout to save! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices