Podcasts about flying higher

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Best podcasts about flying higher

Latest podcast episodes about flying higher

Flying Free
Announcing A New Podcast for Divorced Christian Women! [Flying Higher Moment 020]

Flying Free

Play Episode Listen Later Apr 26, 2025 4:51


Coming June 2025: The Divorced Christian Woman Podcast! This is our last Flying Higher moment as we are gearing up to begin production of our new podcast! Find out what we'll be talking about in our first season!(Don't worry, the Flying Free podcast will continue to serve up hope and healing for Christian women in emotionally and spiritually abusive relationships right here every Tuesday afternoon!)

Flying Free
Healing Doesn't Just Happen at a Weekend Retreat [Flying Higher Moment 019]

Flying Free

Play Episode Listen Later Apr 19, 2025 9:22


Go to flyingfreeworkshop.com to register for our $1 workshop: Is It Abuse? (or am I just being too sensitive?)In this episode, you'll hear what it really means to heal from emotional and spiritual trauma—and why that work is more about daily practice than one-time events. From ego detangling to setting boundaries, this episode is packed with perspective shifts and tiny “aha” moments that might just change how you show up in your healing journey.Resources mentioned: How to Do the Work by Dr. Nicole LePeraFlying Higher

Flying Free
Finding Hope When You Feel Hopeless [Flying Higher Moment 018]

Flying Free

Play Episode Listen Later Apr 12, 2025 17:21


This week, I'm excited to share something transformative I just learned from the book "Coming Alive" by Barry Michels and Phil Stutz. Have you ever felt so completely demoralized that you couldn't see a way forward? That crushing feeling when you believe nothing will ever get better? I've been there too.In this episode, I'll talk about a powerful tool from this book that can gently pull you out of those darkest emotional spaces and reconnect you to hope, resilience, and even joy. Through the story of Ann, a woman devastated by another failed relationship, we explore how we often chase external solutions (like the perfect partner) to fix our internal emptiness, only to find ourselves more disappointed when they don't deliver the salvation we crave.Here's what you'll learn from this episode:• How to identify when you're caught in the trap of "false hope" and why external achievements, relationships, or possessions never fill the void we think they will• The simple 5-step Mother Tool practice that can lift you out of demoralization and reconnect you to your inner strength, even when everything feels hopeless• Real examples of how this tool has helped people transform their creative blocks, unhealthy relationship patterns, and even approach chronic pain with renewed resilienceWhen we're at our lowest, what we need isn't logic or problem-solving – we need love. That's exactly what the Mother Tool helps us access: an unconditional, nurturing presence inside ourselves that sees our worth regardless of our circumstances.This practice isn't about fixing your external situation; it's about shifting your emotional state so you can show up to life with clarity and strength. Because when you reconnect to that loving presence within, you discover the resilience to keep going – not because things are perfect, but because you're loved.Join me for this heart-opening episode where I walk you through exactly how to use this tool in your own life. And if you're craving more connection and growth, remember that my Flying Higher mentorship program offers weekly classes, coaching, and a beautiful community of almost 300 women supporting each other's journeys. You can learn more at joinflyinghigher.com.

Flying Free
The Crushing Cost of Control [Flying Higher Moment 017]

Flying Free

Play Episode Listen Later Apr 5, 2025 8:06


What if the thing keeping you stuck… is your death grip on trying to hold it all together?In this short and fiery episode, Natalie calls out the spiritual hustle we've been sold—and gently offers a better way. If you've been clinging to control, overthinking your faith, or quietly drowning under “good Christian woman” expectations, this one's for you.You don't need to strive harder.You need to breathe, unclench your jaw, and finally release what's not yours to carry.Press play and feel the shift.Go deeper with me in Flying Higher! 

Flying Free
Fear: The Frenemy in Your Head [Flying Higher Moment 016]

Flying Free

Play Episode Listen Later Mar 29, 2025 12:25


Fear. It creeps in when you're trying to sleep, whispers worst-case scenarios while you're washing dishes, and makes you second-guess yourself every time you try to take a brave step forward.But here's the truth: not all fear is bad. In fact, some of it is a God-given superpower... and some of it? More like an overactive smoke alarm when you've just made toast. In this Flying Higher moment, we break down the two kinds of fear—clean fear that protects you and dirty fear that keeps you stuck. You'll learn: ✨ How fear really works in your brain and body ✨ Why Christian women in abusive relationships often live in chronic fear ✨ The surprising root fear hiding under all the others ✨ How to tell if fear is leading you—or limiting you ✨ Practical ways to reclaim your peace (without gaslighting yourself)If you've ever been afraid of making a mistake, being alone, messing up your kids, or just feeling your feelings—this one's for you. Join me for the entire course called The Fear Cure inside Flying Higher by visiting joinflyinghigher.com

Flying Free
How Radical Acceptance Changes Everything [Flying Higher Moment 015]

Flying Free

Play Episode Listen Later Mar 22, 2025 7:47


Flying Free
Feeling Triggered? [Flying Higher Moment 014]

Flying Free

Play Episode Listen Later Mar 15, 2025 9:16


Let's talk about triggers. You know, those moments when someone says the “wrong” thing, and suddenly you're ready to flip a table? Most of us see triggers as a bad thing—proof that we're too sensitive, too emotional, or just plain too much. But what if I told you that your triggers are actually pointing you toward healing?In this week's podcast episode, we're unpacking: ✔️ What triggers actually are (hint: they're not just annoying mood-ruiners) ✔️ Why they happen (spoiler: your brain is just trying to protect you) ✔️ How to heal them so they don't hijack your peace every time someone breathes wrong ✔️ The ultimate trigger survival guide (yes, you can recover faster and freak out less!)If you're ready to stop letting triggers control your emotions and start using them as a tool for growth, this episode is for you.Join me and hundreds of other Christian women 10Xing their own healing and self-development inside Flying Higher! 

Flying Free
How Creativity Can Help You Heal from Emotional and Spiritual Abuse [Flying Higher Moment 013]

Flying Free

Play Episode Listen Later Mar 8, 2025 8:44


Get a one-week trial of Flying Free for only $1 when you go to flyingfreetrial.com! What if I told you that creativity isn't about painting or poetry—it's about how you live? How you take the broken pieces of your story and shape them into something new, something beautiful, something yours.For too long, you were told who to be, what to believe, and how small to make yourself. But here's the truth: You were created to be a powerful co-creator in your own life. And in this episode we're talking about how to break free from perfectionism, fear, and old conditioning so you can start building a life that feels like you.Join Flying Higher in March HERE!

Flying Free
Feeling Like You Don't Belong? Here's Why You Might Be Wrong [Flying Higher Moment 012]

Flying Free

Play Episode Listen Later Mar 1, 2025 27:00


Have you ever felt like you don't belong anywhere—like you're floating between worlds, disconnected from faith, family, or community? You're not alone. In this episode, we dive into a powerful shift happening in Christianity, where people are seeking belonging before belief. But what happens when you feel like you don't belong anywhere? We unravel the truth about belonging, challenge the cages we've been taught to stay in, and explore what it really means to be free. If you've ever questioned your place in the world, this personal message from me to my private community might just change everything. (Yes, I'm giving you a little taste of working with me inside the Kaleidoscope!)I'd love to mentor you! Join me inside Flying Higher!

Flying Free
How Do I Know if Divorce Is the Right Choice for Me? [316]

Flying Free

Play Episode Listen Later Feb 25, 2025 47:37


In today's episode, I explore the complex question: Is divorce worth it? For women who have endured long-term emotional and psychological abuse in marriage, this decision is often fraught with fear, confusion, and uncertainty.I examine the disadvantages of staying in an abusive relationship, as well as the significant challenges faced during and after the divorce process. With thought-provoking questions and practical insights, this episode will help you assess whether leaving your marriage is the right choice for you. If you're feeling trapped and looking for clarity, support, and a path forward, this episode is for you.Key Takeaways:The emotional and psychological toll of staying in an abusive marriage.Physical and financial disadvantages of staying.Social and legal challenges of remaining in abuse.The harsh reality of divorce.Life after divorce—the path to healing.Guiding questions to determine if divorce is the right choice for you.Read the show notes and/or ask Natalie a question hereRelated Resources: Check out my interview with the founder of the app, Aimee Says, and then try it out for yourself!Read the article I mentioned, “How to Leave an Emotionally Abusive Relationship: 10 Steps.” Are you wondering what is happening inside your own painful and confusing marriage? I wrote a book just for you called Is It Me? Making Sense of Your Confusing Marriage: A Christian Woman's Guide to Hidden Emotional and Spiritual Abuse.My book, All the Scary Little Gods, is a spiritual memoir about healing from religious trauma and toxic programming. Flying Free is our online community educating and supporting Christian women in emotionally abusive marriages. Whether you want to stay in your marriage or leave, we want to equip you through this program.Flying Higher is my live mentorship program for any Christian woman interested in 10Xing their self-development progress. 

Flying Free
Messy Rooms: A Flying Higher Moment 011

Flying Free

Play Episode Listen Later Feb 22, 2025 7:07


What if the real problem isn't the messy room, the frustrating coworker, or the difficult conversation—but the lens you're seeing it through? In this episode, we dive into the story of Sarah, a mom who transformed her daily frustration by shifting her perspective using the CLEAR model. If you're ready to reclaim your peace—without waiting for anyone else to change (because we all know THAT ain't happenin')—this episode is for you! Join me and hundreds of other Christian women leveling it up in my affordable live mentorship program, Flying Higher! 

Flying Free
Broken Trust: When Church Hurts You [315]

Flying Free

Play Episode Listen Later Feb 18, 2025 51:55


In this eye-opening episode, Natalie shares her personal story of spiritual abuse and excommunication, offering a powerful backdrop for her conversation with author and spiritual consultant, Remy Diederich. Together, they delve into the dynamics of toxic faith, spiritual abuse, and how unhealthy church cultures can harm individuals and families.Remy, the author of Broken Trust, shares insights from his decades of ministry experience and his passion for helping people heal from spiritual abuse. Whether you're grappling with toxic religious environments or recovering from years of harmful teachings, this episode offers hope, practical advice, and a fresh perspective.Key Takeaways:Understanding Spiritual Abuse: Spiritual abuse often involves toxic leadership that weaponizes faith to control, manipulate, or shame individuals.Toxic Faith vs. Spiritual Abuse: Toxic faith is the belief that you must perform or meet certain standards to please God, while spiritual abuse occurs when leaders use those beliefs to exploit or control others.The Impact of Spiritual Abuse on Relationships: Abuse within churches often mirrors abusive dynamics in families, leading to distrust, division, and confusion.Healing from Spiritual Abuse: Recovery begins with identifying harmful patterns, stepping away if necessary, and seeking support through books, therapy, and supportive communities.The Power of Questioning Toxic Narratives: It's okay to question teachings and leaders. Faith flourishes when it's rooted in personal connection with God, not human-made rules.Read the show notes and/or ask Natalie a question hereRelated Resources: Read one (or all) of Remy's books: Broken Trust, Healing the Hurts of Your Past, Return From Exile, and Stuck are some of my favorites. Connect with Remy on his site. Go visit Remy over on YouTube. Email Remy at remy@readingremy.com to request an audiobook code (limited supply).Check out Be Emboldened for support as you recover from spiritual abuse.Related article and episode: “Bethlehem Baptist Church Is Not Safe for Emotionally Abused Women,” and “Is Your Church Safe?”Are you wondering what is happening inside your own painful and confusing marriage? I wrote a book just for you called Is It Me? Making Sense of Your Confusing Marriage: A Christian Woman's Guide to Hidden Emotional and Spiritual Abuse.My book, All the Scary Little Gods, is a spiritual memoir about healing from religious trauma and toxic programming. Flying Free is our online community educating and supporting Christian women in emotionally abusive marriages. Whether you want to stay in your marriage or leave, we want to equip you through this program.Flying Higher is my live mentorship program for any Christian woman interested in 10Xing their self-development progress. Remy is a seasoned pastor and spiritual consultant with a heart for helping others overcome life's challenges. Over his three decades of ministry, he's authored six books that offer practical guidance and spiritual support for those seeking healing and connection to God. Remy's expertise extends beyond the pulpit. He's spent 24 years as a spiritual consultant at an addiction treatment center, where he's witnessed firsthand the transformative power of faith and hope. Today, Remy dedicates his time to empowering pastors to build healthy church cultures and coaching individuals on the themes of his books. A lifelong resident of Minneapolis, Minnesota, Remy is married with three adult children. His passion for helping others shines through in his writing, speaking, and counseling.

Flying Free
Christianity After Religion: A Flying Higher Moment 010

Flying Free

Play Episode Listen Later Feb 15, 2025 12:09


If you've ever side-eyed church culture and thought, “This can't be what Jesus had in mind,” you're not alone. In this episode, we dig into Christianity After Religion by Diana Butler Bass and talk about why the old way of doing church is crumbling—and why that's actually good news. If you're tired of toxic religion but still crave something real, this conversation will give you hope, validation, and maybe even a little fire to keep going.Join the Flying Higher Butterflies as we study the Bible, read books together, coach, and do classes in a live mentorship online setting each week! 

Flying Free
Parallel Parenting Part One [311]

Flying Free

Play Episode Listen Later Jan 21, 2025 42:28


In today's episode, we're diving into the topic of parallel parenting—what it means, why it matters, and how it can empower you as a mother to create a home filled with love and stability, even when co-parenting feels like a battlefield.We explore how to rise above emotional manipulation, operate from a place of peace and truth, and model resilience for your children. Whether you're navigating parallel parenting or seeking emotional clarity, this episode is full of practical wisdom and hope.Read the show notes and/or ask Natalie a question hereRelated Resources:Love Diana? We have another episode with her here: The Importance of Empathy for Yourself.Check out Diana's website.Follow Diana's podcast, The Renew Your Mind Podcast. Some of her best episodes include “Staying Out of Family Drama,” “Have To Vs. Choose To,” “When People Are Wrong About You,” “When People Are Right About You,” and “Accepting What Is.”Follow Diana on Facebook and Instagram.Are you in emotionally and spiritually abusive relationship? You might want to also listen to this episode: Are You Married to a Quiet Covert Abuser with a Hidden Lifestyle?Are you wondering what is happening inside your own painful and confusing marriage? I wrote a book just for you called Is It Me? Making Sense of Your Confusing Marriage: A Christian Woman's Guide to Hidden Emotional and Spiritual Abuse.My book, All the Scary Little Gods, is a spiritual memoir about healing from religious trauma and toxic programming. Flying Free is our online community educating and supporting Christian women in emotionally abusive marriages. Whether you want to stay in your marriage or leave, we want to equip you through this program.Flying Higher is my live mentorship program for any Christian woman interested in 10Xing their self-development progress. Diana Swillinger is a life and business coach, host of The Renew Your Mind Podcast, and founder of the Renew Your Mind Institute Coach Training. After decades of trying please God, be a good person and do the right thing, she ended up exhausted and discouraged. Desperate for a solution, Diana went back to school, joined personal development programs, and more, then took what she learned and created mind renewal tools that let her love life in every situation no matter what comes her way. Over the past 5 year she has empowered thousands of women with those same tools to heal themselves, get back to who God created them to be, and build a life they love.

Flying Free
Who Can You Trust? A Flying Higher Moment 009

Flying Free

Play Episode Listen Later Jan 18, 2025 7:32


Trust is complicated—especially after experiencing disappointment or hurt. Is it possible to fully trust anyone? What does it take to build trust, and where should it start? In this episode, we explore these questions, challenge common assumptions about trust, and share a fresh perspective on building stronger, healthier relationships.You won't want to miss this episode—it might just change the way you think about trust forever.Would you like to be part of my live mentorship program, Flying Higher? Head over HERE to learn more! 

Flying Free
What if My Abusive Husband Has Mental Health Issues? [310]

Flying Free

Play Episode Listen Later Jan 14, 2025 35:12


What if my abusive husband has mental health issues? Drawing on listener input, I tackle the complexities of abuse intertwined with mental health diagnoses such as bipolar disorder, ADHD, anxiety, and depression. I want to help you navigate the tricky waters of understanding biblical interpretations around staying in abusive relationships “in sickness and in health.” This episode is a lifeline for women seeking clarity and peace while healing and growing within difficult circumstances.What You'll Learn in This Episode:Why anger and critical thinking are normal, healthy responses to injustice.How to unhook from shaming tactics used by abusers and others.The importance of stewarding your own mental, physical, and spiritual health.A biblical perspective on “in sickness and in health” in the context of abusive relationships.Why it's not helpful to focus on parsing out mental illness vs. abuse in relationships.Read the show notes and/or ask Natalie a question hereRelated Resources:Are you wondering what is happening inside your own painful and confusing marriage? I wrote a book just for you called Is It Me? Making Sense of Your Confusing Marriage: A Christian Woman's Guide to Hidden Emotional and Spiritual Abuse.My book, All the Scary Little Gods, is a spiritual memoir about healing from religious trauma and toxic programming. Flying Free is our online community educating and supporting Christian women in emotionally abusive marriages. Whether you want to stay in your marriage or leave, we want to equip you through this program.Flying Higher is my live mentorship program for any Christian woman interested in 10Xing their self-development progress. 

Flying Free
This Moment is Your Gift—Unwrap It! A Flying Higher Moment 008

Flying Free

Play Episode Listen Later Jan 11, 2025 10:41


I'm watching my babies go from being children to being young men, and I gotta be honest, it's making me sadder than I've been in a long time. In this Flying Higher moment I'll share a new thought I had this morning as I watched my 14-year-old in the kitchen. A thought that helped create a deeper shift within me from sadness to joy. Maybe it will help you as much as it helped me. Need a mentor this year? Go to joinflyinghigher.com to learn more!

Flying Free
The Importance of Empathy for Yourself [309]

Flying Free

Play Episode Listen Later Jan 7, 2025 54:29


Today I visit with Diana Swillinger, a life coach and fellow advocate for personal growth and healing. Together, we explore the profound role of empathy—not just for others but for yourself—in overcoming life's challenges and moving forward.Key Topics Covered: The role of empathy in healingPersonal responsibility vs. victim-blamingThe difference between needing validation and needing empowermentThe importance of challenging our deeply rooted beliefsA powerful tool for growthBuilding a life aligned with the heart of GodRead the show notes and/or ask Natalie a question hereRelated Resources:Love Diana? Listen to Episode 256 of the Flying Free Podcast to get more of her!Check out Diana's website.Follow Diana's podcast, The Renew Your Mind Podcast. Some of her best episodes include “Staying Out of Family Drama,” “Have To Vs. Choose To,” “When People Are Wrong About You,” “When People Are Right About You,” and “Accepting What Is.”Follow Diana on Facebook and Instagram.Are you wondering what is happening inside your own painful and confusing marriage? I wrote a book just for you called Is It Me? Making Sense of Your Confusing Marriage: A Christian Woman's Guide to Hidden Emotional and Spiritual Abuse.My book, All the Scary Little Gods, is a spiritual memoir about healing from religious trauma and toxic programming. Flying Free is our online community educating and supporting Christian women in emotionally abusive marriages. Whether you want to stay in your marriage or leave, we want to equip you through this program.Flying Higher is my live mentorship program for any Christian woman interested in 10Xing their self-development progress. Diana Swillinger is a life and business coach, host of The Renew Your Mind Podcast, and founder of the Renew Your Mind Institute Coach Training. After decades of trying please God, be a good person and do the right thing, she ended up exhausted and discouraged. Desperate for a solution, Diana went back to school, joined personal development programs, and more, then took what she learned and created mind renewal tools that let her love life in every situation no matter what comes her way. Over the past 5 year she has empowered thousands of women with those same tools to heal themselves, get back to who God created them to be, and build a life they love.

Flying Free
A Two-Word Exercise to Shift Your World in 2025: A Flying Higher Moment 007

Flying Free

Play Episode Listen Later Jan 4, 2025 12:24


This week's Flying Higher moment introduces a simple exercise that will help you discover core beliefs that are keeping you stuck. You'll also learn how to quickly create a shift in your body that will give you just enough energy to regain some power and control in your life. It's a powerful exercise to try right at the beginning of 2025! Links mentioned:Try Flying Free one week for one dollar now through January 5, 2025 - Click HEREFlying FreeFlying Higher

Flying Free
What One Year Can Do in the Life of a Woman [308]

Flying Free

Play Episode Listen Later Jan 1, 2025 33:39


Would you like to try a week of Flying Free for only one dollar? Access one full week of classes, workshops, coaching sessions (searchable by topic), and professional coaches in our private forum, and get your new year off to a brand new, life giving start! This offer can only be accessed via this link ​HERE​. Hurry, because this offer ends on Sunday, January 5. SPECIAL OFFER: GET ONE WEEK OF FLYING FREE FOR ONLY $1! Access all the good stuff inside the Flying Free program for seven days and get your new year off to a brand new, life giving start! This offer can only be accessed HERE and it ends on Sunday, January 5, 2025. (If you wish you could be informed about free workshops, live Q&A's, and special offers like this one, be sure to hop on my mailing list by going to flyingfreenow.com!)In today's episode, I reflect on the incredible transformations that can happen in just one year. (That's not a very long time, when you think about it! I feel like every January, I blink, and it's December!)Through powerful testimonials from Christian women, I highlight the courage, growth, and healing that come in just one year of taking intentional steps to break free from abuse, rebuild a life of freedom, and pursue self-development.Discover how these women overcame fear, anxiety, and self-doubt to embrace healing, reclaim their identities, and create lives full of purpose and joy. Whether you're navigating the complexities of divorce, overcoming spiritual abuse, or simply seeking personal growth, this episode will encourage you to imagine your own transformation in the coming year.What You'll Hear in This Episode:Heartfelt stories of resilience and transformation from Christian women just like you.Reflections on recognizing abuse, setting boundaries, and finding freedom.Insights into rebuilding relationships with God, children, and oneself after abuse.An invitation to intentionally plan for growth and healing in 2025 Read the show notes and/or ask Natalie a question hereRelated Resources:Grab your own butterfly planner for 2025 (and consider joining us in Flying Higher if you want to go through the Wings to Soar planning workshop with me in January 2025!)Listen to the episode mentioned in today's show, Episode 197, about all of our different parts and how they interact on our bus!Are you wondering what is happening inside your own painful and confusing marriage? I wrote a book just for you called Is It Me? Making Sense of Your Confusing Marriage: A Christian Woman's Guide to Hidden Emotional and Spiritual Abuse.My book, All the Scary Little Gods, is a spiritual memoir about healing from religious trauma and toxic programming. Flying Free is our online community educating and supporting Christian women in emotionally abusive marriages. Whether you want to stay in your marriage or leave, we want to equip you through this program.Flying Higher is my live mentorship program for any Christian woman interested in 10Xing their self-development progress. 

Flying Free
Faith or Fear? A Flying Higher Moment 006

Flying Free

Play Episode Listen Later Dec 28, 2024 14:39


Do you ever wonder if you're measuring up to God's standard? If you're good enough to win God's attention and help? If you've done enough to make your life really matter?If you're looking for a little hope, joy, and maybe even a restored connection to God's original design for humanity, I invite you to listen in to today's Flying Higher moment and embrace the possibility of a deeper faith journey rooted in love instead of manipulation and shame.Resources mentioned: Flying Higher

Flying Free
When Christmas Doesn't Smell Like You Expected [307]

Flying Free

Play Episode Listen Later Dec 24, 2024 16:32


Hi friends, and Merry Christmas! I hope this special day brings moments of peace and reflection, wherever you are and whatever you're doing. In this solo episode, I reflect on the powerful connection between scent, memory, and emotion—especially during the holiday season. I'll share personal stories, including my years as a soap maker, and how the fragrances of Christmas invite us to reflect on our own environments and experiences.We'll explore what it means to find hope and healing in unexpected circumstances and how the true spirit of Christmas can create a lasting fragrance of love, even in challenging seasons.What You'll Learn in This Episode:How our senses connect to our memories and emotions.Why we can grow numb to unhealthy environments.A reflection on religious attitudes and how they impact others,The hope and beauty found in embracing life as it is, not as we expected.Read the show notes and/or ask Natalie a question hereRelated Resources:Are you wondering what is happening inside your own painful and confusing marriage? I wrote a book just for you called Is It Me? Making Sense of Your Confusing Marriage: A Christian Woman's Guide to Hidden Emotional and Spiritual Abuse. (The Kindle version is only $2.99 now through the end of the year!)My book, All the Scary Little Gods, is a spiritual memoir about healing from religious trauma and toxic programming. (Again - the Kindle version is only $2.99 now through the end of the year!)Flying Free is our online community educating and supporting Christian women in emotionally abusive marriages. Whether you want to stay in your marriage or leave, we want to equip you through this program.Flying Higher is my live mentorship program for any Christian woman interested in 10Xing their self-development progress. 

Flying Free
Letting Go: A Flying Higher Moment 005

Flying Free

Play Episode Listen Later Dec 21, 2024 10:56


In this episode, we explore what it truly means to "fly higher" in life, even when weighed down by challenges and pain. Through a story and metaphor, you'll learn how letting go of control and embracing internal freedom can transform your darkest moments. Resource mentioned:Flying Higher

Flying Free
Lessons I'm Learning in Physical Therapy About How We Heal [306]

Flying Free

Play Episode Listen Later Dec 17, 2024 29:27


In today's reflective episode, I share insights from my ongoing recovery following a recent car accident that left me with a broken wrist. I want to draw some powerful parallels for you between my physical therapy journey and the emotional and spiritual healing journeys faced by survivors of abuse.Key Topics Covered:The reality of physical therapy (hint - it's not a walk in the park) The role of support systemsEmbracing pain for growthHealing through alignment with your programmingThe power of music to healRead the show notes and/or ask Natalie a question hereRelated Resources:Check out the Flying Free playlist on Spotify! Are you wondering what is happening inside your own painful and confusing marriage? I wrote another book just for you called Is It Me? Making Sense of Your Confusing Marriage: A Christian Woman's Guide to Hidden Emotional and Spiritual Abuse.My newest book, All the Scary Little Gods, is a spiritual memoir about healing from religious trauma and toxic programming. Flying Free is my online membership program designed for Christian women in emotionally abusive marriages. Whether you want to stay in your marriage or leave, we want to equip and support you through this program.Flying Higher is my online membership program for Christian women interested in 10Xing their self-development progress. 

Flying Free
From Dreams to Reality: A Flying Higher Moment 004

Flying Free

Play Episode Listen Later Dec 14, 2024 8:26


"If I could give you 10x what I paid to join Flying Higher it wouldn't even scrape the true value of the deep level of understanding you have for being exactly where I am right now and how grateful I am that you teach us without holding back." Flying Higher ButterflyResources mentioned:The Butterfly PlannerThe Flying Free Website (to hop on my mailing list!)Flying FreeFlying Higher

Flying Free
When Coercively Controlling Fathers Sabotage Mothers' Relationships With Their Children [305]

Flying Free

Play Episode Listen Later Dec 10, 2024 52:00


In this deeply insightful episode, I sit down with Dr. Emma Katz to discuss the phenomenon of coercively controlling fathers sabotaging mothers' relationships with their children. Dr. Katz introduces the term “child and mother sabotage” (CAMS) to replace the often co-opted term “parental alienation,” highlighting its roots in coercive control and its frequent targeting of mothers.Dr. Katz explains how societal sexism plays a critical role in these dynamics, amplifying the harm done to mothers and perpetuating harmful stereotypes. She also touches on the challenges survivors face in escaping abuse and emphasizes the strength and resilience it takes to rebuild after experiencing coercive control.Key Topics Discussed:CAMS Explained: Why “child and mother sabotage” is a more accurate and protective term than “parental alienation.”The Role of Societal Bias: How sexist stereotypes are weaponized against mothers in cases of coercive control.Global Gender Bias: Findings from UN research that show the pervasive bias against women worldwide.Survivor Recognition: Why victims of coercive control deserve societal recognition akin to war heroes.Practical Guidance: How survivors can use CAMS terminology in legal and advocacy settings.Read the show notes and/or ask Natalie a question hereRelated Resources:Read Dr. Katz's book, Coercive Control in Children's and Mothers' Lives.Read the article that Dr. Katz quoted from in today's interview. Check out Dr. Katz's Substack and connect with her on Twitter, Instagram, LinkedIn, and Facebook. Are you wondering what is happening inside your own painful and confusing marriage? I wrote another book just for you called Is It Me? Making Sense of Your Confusing Marriage: A Christian Woman's Guide to Hidden Emotional and Spiritual Abuse.My newest book, All the Scary Little Gods, is a spiritual memoir about healing from religious trauma and toxic programming. Flying Free is my online membership program designed for Christian women in emotionally abusive marriages. Whether you want to stay in your marriage or leave, we want to equip and support you through this program.Flying Higher is my online membership program for Christian women interested in 10Xing their self-development progress. Dr. Emma Katz is a researcher in domestic violence and coercive control, whose work has helped shape legislation and professional practice globally. Her book, Coercive Control in Children's and Mothers' Lives (Oxford University Press), is widely acclaimed. Emma also brings her research to the public in an accessible and influential way on her platform "Decoding Coercive Control with Dr. Emma Katz", which is read by 10,000s of people in more than 90 countries around the world. Emma's research has illuminated children's experiences of coercive control, which had previously remained largely invisible. She argues that children are affected by many forms of abuse inherent to coercive control, including the breaking down of close relationships with loved ones, deprivation of resources, constrained behavior and isolation from the outside world. Her research has been described as "pioneering work" that "will change how we understand and respond to children's experience of domestic abuse.”

Flying Free
Christmas Magic: A Flying Higher Moment 003

Flying Free

Play Episode Listen Later Dec 8, 2024 12:00


What is Christmas Magic? Do you feel like you're missing out? Here's an idea that might help you have the most magical Christmas of your entire life this year, and your circumstances don't even have to change. Resources mentioned:Podcast episodes and articles related to holiday challenges HERE.Flying Free (for Christian women stuck in emotionally and spiritually abusive relationships, families of origin, or religious communities)Flying Higher (for Christian women ready to move forward from abuse into their own personal metamorphosis adventure)

Flying Free
What a Car Accident Taught Me About Pain [304]

Flying Free

Play Episode Listen Later Dec 3, 2024 34:21


In this personal and anecdotal episode, I reflect on a recent car accident that changed my perspective on pain, resilience, and staying present. Drawing from my own experience of navigating physical injury, emotional turmoil, and life's unexpected disruptions, I want to share some valuable lessons on accepting pain and choosing who we want to be in the midst of it.Key TakeawaysPain is a Universal Experience: Everyone faces pain in various forms. Adjusting expectations helps to navigate life's inevitable challenges.Choosing Who to Be in Pain: While we can't control painful circumstances, we can choose our response and who we want to become in those moments.Faith and Resilience: God is present in our suffering, showing us how to lean into pain and live authentically.The Value of Lament: Acknowledging and naming our losses is essential. Lamenting is not about toxic positivity but about truthfully addressing the pain while moving forward.Staying Present: Focusing on the current moment can alleviate overwhelm and help manage pain one step at a time.Read the show notes and/or ask Natalie a question hereRelated Resources:Check out the books I mentioned: Man's Search for Meaning by Viktor Frankl and The Hiding Place by Corrie Ten Boom. Are you wondering what is happening inside your own painful and confusing marriage? I wrote another book just for you called Is It Me? Making Sense of Your Confusing Marriage: A Christian Woman's Guide to Hidden Emotional and Spiritual Abuse.My newest book, All the Scary Little Gods, is a spiritual memoir about healing from religious trauma and toxic programming. Flying Free is my online membership program designed for Christian women in emotionally abusive marriages. Whether you want to stay in your marriage or leave, we want to equip and support you through this program.Flying Higher is my online membership program for Christian women interested in 10Xing their self-development progress. 

Flying Free
Flying Higher Moment 002: Parenting

Flying Free

Play Episode Listen Later Dec 1, 2024 19:17


If you've ever wondered "is my child an abuser?" you'll want to listen to this Flying Higher moment.Learn more:Flying FreeFlying Higher

Flying Free
Befriending Our Anxiety [303]

Flying Free

Play Episode Listen Later Nov 26, 2024 47:52


In today's episode, I interview Natalie Deering, an Internal Family Systems (IFS) therapist and host of That Wellness Podcast. Together, we explore practical and spiritual approaches to anxiety, offering tools to transform anxiety from an adversary into an ally. We discuss personal experiences, explain key IFS concepts like "trailheads," and share exercises to regulate the nervous system and foster self-compassion.Key Topics Discussed:Understanding anxiety as a trailhead (find out what a trailhead is in IFS too!)Practical self-regulation tools.The role of fear in anxiety.Spiritual integration.Everyday self-embodiment practices (SEEs).Read the show notes and/or ask Natalie a question hereRelated Resources:Connect with Natalie on her website and on Instagram.Listen to Natalie's podcast, That Wellness Podcast.Check out the books Natalie mentioned, “Why Zebras Don't Get Ulcers” and “Fuel Your Brain, Not Your Anxiety: Stop the Cycle of Worry, Fatigue, and Sugar Cravings with Simple Protein-Rich Foods.” Are you wondering what is happening inside your own painful and confusing marriage? I wrote another book just for you called Is It Me? Making Sense of Your Confusing Marriage: A Christian Woman's Guide to Hidden Emotional and Spiritual Abuse.My newest book, All the Scary Little Gods, is a spiritual memoir using IFS about healing from religious trauma and toxic programming. Flying Free is my online membership program designed for Christian women in emotionally abusive marriages. Whether you want to stay in your marriage or leave, we want to equip and support you through this program.Flying Higher is my online membership program for Christian women interested in 10Xing their self-development progress. Natalie Deering is a licensed mental health therapist and IFS level 2 practitioner who specializes in using Internal Family Systems therapy to help people get to know their authentic selves and heal the parts of them that are stuck in the past. Natalie hosts That Wellness Podcast, a podcast that provides interesting IFS-related interviews and meditations for people who are doing healing work on their inner parts using IFS. 

Flying Free
Flying Higher Moment 001: Decluttering

Flying Free

Play Episode Listen Later Nov 24, 2024 12:33 Transcription Available


Introducing Flying Higher Moments: A short little weekly insight into topics that are important to you. Today we talk about the parts of us that want to hang onto things in case we might need them AND the parts of us who think that's dumb. Let's talk about decluttering! Resources mentioned:All the Scary Little GodsFlying FreeFlying Higher

Flying Free
An AI Tool for Abuse Survivors

Flying Free

Play Episode Listen Later Nov 19, 2024 51:50


The link to register for this week's FREE Q&A with the founder of Aimee Says, Anne Wintemute, is HERE! This Q&A will take place on Saturday, November 23 at 11:00 am Central Time. Again, you can register for this event on Zoom HERE.In this compelling episode, Natalie Hoffman talks with Anne Wintemute, founder of Aimee Says, an innovative AI tool designed to support abuse survivors. Natalie and Anne explore how Aimee Says provides both immediate, compassionate assistance and long-term documentation capabilities for those navigating abusive situations. Anne shares the tool's features, including its free and paid versions, and emphasizes its privacy and security safeguards. Together, they illustrate how Aimee Says can be an empowering companion for survivors, particularly those involved in legal matters like custody cases.Key Points:Anne's personal motivation for creating an AI tool focused on empowering abuse survivors.The tool's core purpose of providing survivors with a private, supportive, and easily accessible resource.The features of both free and paid accounts.AI as a transformative tool in abuse advocacy.Practical use case examples.Read the show notes and/or ask Natalie a question hereRelated Resources:Check out Aimee Says for free today. Are you wondering what is happening inside your own painful and confusing marriage? I wrote another book just for you called Is It Me? Making Sense of Your Confusing Marriage: A Christian Woman's Guide to Hidden Emotional and Spiritual Abuse.My newest book, All the Scary Little Gods, is a spiritual memoir about healing from religious trauma and toxic programming. Flying Free is my online membership program designed for Christian women in emotionally abusive marriages. Whether you want to stay in your marriage or leave, we want to equip and support you through this program.Flying Higher is my online membership program for divorced Christian women. Come rebuild your life after divorce with women just like you. Anne Wintemute is the Co-Founder and CEO of Aimee Says, the AI companion for victims and survivors of domestic violence.  She is a fierce champion for the rights of survivors and children, and systems that hold perpetrators accountable. Prior to working with survivors, Anne founded and directed an elementary school that became a model for micro-schools across the United States. In her spare time, she enjoys urban homesteading with her partner and their blended family in Denver, Colorado.

Flying Free
NeuroDiverse Marriages [301]

Flying Free

Play Episode Listen Later Nov 12, 2024 51:09


In this episode, I interview Dr. Stephanie Holmes to explore the unique challenges and dynamics within neurodiverse marriages. We talk about how Autism interacts with faith, how religion plays into neurodiversity, the difference between abusers and neurodiverse individuals, and how neurodiverse couples can navigate their relationships more effectively. Dr. Holmes shares insights from her extensive experience working with these couples.Read the show notes and/or ask Natalie a question hereRelated Resources:Check out Stephanie's Autism Spectrum Resources for Marriage & Family as well as the International Association of NeuroDiverse Christian Marriage. Go listen to Stephanie's podcast, NeuroDiverse Christian Couples.Find Stephanie on YouTube.Pre-order Stephanie's book, Uniquely Us.Are you wondering what is happening inside your own painful and confusing marriage? I wrote another book just for you called Is It Me? Making Sense of Your Confusing Marriage: A Christian Woman's Guide to Hidden Emotional and Spiritual Abuse.My newest book, All the Scary Little Gods, is a spiritual memoir about healing from religious trauma and toxic programming. Flying Free is my online membership program designed for Christian women in emotionally abusive marriages. Whether you want to stay in your marriage or leave, we want to equip and support you through this program.Flying Higher is my online membership program for divorced Christian women. Come rebuild your life after divorce with women just like you.Dr. Stephanie C. Holmes is an ordained minister, author, autism researcher, speaker, and certified autism specialist. She is the owner and founder of Autism Spectrum Resources for Marriage & Family, LLC, and she and her husband, Dan, are co-founders of The International Association of NeuroDiverse Christian Marriage, LLC, and the podcast NeuroDiverse Christian Couples.  

Flying Free
300th Episode Celebration [300]

Flying Free

Play Episode Listen Later Nov 5, 2024 27:16


We are celebrating 300 episodes of the Flying Free podcast by looking at where this podcast started, what has been accomplished since then, and where we are heading in the future! Read the show notes and/or ask Natalie a question hereRelated Resources:Are you wondering what is happening inside your own painful and confusing marriage? I wrote another book just for you called Is It Me? Making Sense of Your Confusing Marriage: A Christian Woman's Guide to Hidden Emotional and Spiritual Abuse.My newest book, All the Scary Little Gods, is a spiritual memoir about healing from religious trauma and toxic programming. Flying Free is my online membership program designed for Christian women in emotionally abusive marriages. Whether you want to stay in your marriage or leave, we want to equip and support you through this program.Flying Higher is my online membership program for divorced Christian women. Come rebuild your life after divorce with women just like you. 

Flying Free
Can You Work Together with an Abuser? [299]

Flying Free

Play Episode Listen Later Oct 29, 2024 28:14


In today's episode, I answer a listener's question about co-parenting with an abusive ex and challenge the idea of "working together" with abusers. You'll learn the importance of shifting the focus away from the abuser and toward personal healing and growth.Key Takeaways:Stop investing emotional energy into trying to "fix" or "work with" an abusive person. It's a cycle that leads nowhere.Redefine what it means to be a "father"—biological ties do not make someone a healthy or safe parent.Avoid gaslighting your children by pretending their experiences with their abusive parent are fun or normal.It is impossible to thrive while working with someone who thrives on control and abuse. The focus should be on healing yourself and your children.Read the show notes and/or ask Natalie a question hereRelated Resources:Episodes mentioned with Bob Hamp: Episode 1, Episode 76, Episode 277, and Episode 297.Are you wondering what is happening inside your own painful and confusing marriage? I wrote another book just for you called Is It Me? Making Sense of Your Confusing Marriage: A Christian Woman's Guide to Hidden Emotional and Spiritual Abuse.My newest book, All the Scary Little Gods, is a spiritual memoir about healing from religious trauma and toxic programming. Flying Free is my online membership program designed for Christian women in emotionally abusive marriages. Whether you want to stay in your marriage or leave, we want to equip and support you through this program.Flying Higher is my online membership program for divorced Christian women. Come rebuild your life after divorce with women just like you. 

Flying Free
Sexual Coercion and Betrayal in Marriage [298]

Flying Free

Play Episode Listen Later Oct 22, 2024 72:21


In this episode, Natalie interviews guest Anne Blythe, a leader in the Betrayal Trauma Recovery community. Together, they discuss the profound impact of sharing survivor stories, how lived experience can be just as valuable as formal expertise, and the damaging effects of sexual coercion in abusive relationships. Anne also sheds light on critical issues like manipulation, trauma, and reclaiming safety.Some Key Takeaways: Sexual Coercion and Abuse: Anne emphasizes how sexual coercion is often a hidden form of abuse within relationships. Many women face manipulation and pressure regarding sexual behaviors, which is often downplayed or ignored by their abusers, adding layers of trauma.Removing Shame from the Healing Process: Survivors often feel isolated or ashamed of their experiences, but through sharing their stories and seeking help, they can shed this burden.Prioritizing Safety Over Confrontation: Directly confronting an abuser often leads to further manipulation. Instead, focusing on safety and gathering support is a crucial first step in the healing process.Read the show notes and/or ask Natalie a question hereRelated Resources:Listen to Anne's podcast, Betrayal Trauma Recovery, on your favorite podcast listening app. Read Anne's book, Trauma Mama Husband Drama.Check out Anne's Meditation, Living Free, and Message workshops.Connect with Anne on Instagram, YouTube, and TikTok. If you've found porn on your husband's phone, you can get a simple PDF HERE about what to do next.Are you wondering what is happening inside your own painful and confusing marriage? I wrote another book just for you called Is It Me? Making Sense of Your Confusing Marriage: A Christian Woman's Guide to Hidden Emotional and Spiritual Abuse.My newest book, All the Scary Little Gods, is a spiritual memoir about healing from religious trauma and toxic programming. Flying Free is my online membership program designed for Christian women in emotionally abusive marriages. Whether you want to stay in your marriage or leave, we want to equip and support you through this program.Flying Higher is my online membership program for divorced Christian women. Come rebuild your life after divorce with women just like you. Anne is the Producer & Host of The BTR.ORG podcast and the author of Trauma Mama Husband Drama. She's also the creator of: The BTR.ORG Meditation, Living Free, and Message Workshops. After years of attempting to stop her husband's pornography use and “anger issues,” she turned her attention to establishing emotional and psychological safety for herself and her three children. As she learns in real-time, Anne shares her journey to help women safely and effectively separate themselves from their husbands' (or exes') emotional & psychological abuse and sexual coercion in order to establish peace in their homes. You can sign up to get group sessions with the coaches at BTR.ORG HERE.

Flying Free
How to Let Go of Shame and the Need for Validation [297]

Flying Free

Play Episode Listen Later Oct 15, 2024 35:28


In today's episode, I have a powerful and insightful discussion with guest speaker Bob Hamp as part of a live Q&A we did with members of the Flying Free Kaleidoscope about the complexities of emotions, particularly anger, and the challenges faced by those in emotionally abusive relationships. Here's a summary of the key points and concepts:1. Understanding Emotions:Emotions as Drivers: Emotions are energy in motion that propel us forward and should be embraced rather than repressed.Indicators of Inner States: Emotions serve as indicators (like a dashboard) that reveal our internal states and beliefs, particularly anger, which signals that a boundary has been crossed.Anger as a Response: Anger can be a protective response to repeated boundary violations, masking deeper emotions such as pain or fear.2. The Need for Validation:Craving Validation: After experiencing emotional abuse, individuals often seek external validation to affirm their feelings and experiences due to a distorted self-image created by the abuser.Living in a House of Mirrors: Emotional abusers create an environment where one's self-perception is constantly challenged and distorted, leading to confusion and self-doubt.Research on Healing: Studies show that validation from others can help regulate the nervous system and facilitate healing for trauma survivors.3. Mutual Abuse vs. Conflictual Enmeshment:Mutual Abuse: This term suggests that both parties are equally culpable, but in abusive dynamics, there's often a power differential where one partner exerts control over the other.Conflictual Enmeshment: This involves two people blaming each other for their issues without one holding more power over the other. The dynamics can feel like mutual blame, but there's usually a more dominant party in emotionally abusive situations.4. Setting Boundaries:Empowerment Through Boundaries: Establishing personal boundaries is essential. Boundaries involve controlling one's response to others rather than attempting to control others' behaviors.Responses to Boundaries: Abusers often react negatively to boundaries, framing them as controlling behaviors. Recognizing this is crucial in identifying an abusive dynamic.5. Independence and Self-Validation:Moving Towards Independence: The journey from dependence to independence is critical for emotional and relational health. The goal is to validate oneself rather than rely on others for validation.Finding Self-Worth: Ultimately, the most empowering position is to own your self-worth, which frees you from the need for external validation and allows for healthier relationships.6. Practical Steps Forward:Healing Courses: Engaging in resources like courses focused on healing relationships with oneself can aid in developing self-validation and independence. We have a course called “Healing Your Relationship with Yourself” inside of the Flying Free Kaleidoscope. Join today to get access to that course as well as many others! Read the show notes and/or ask Natalie a question hereRelated Resources:Connect with Bob on Facebook and Twitter, and take a look at his program, Think Differently Academy.Check out Bob's “Think Differently” book series.Listen to more episodes of the Flying Free Podcast that we've done with Bob: Episode 1, Episode 76, and  Episode 277, Are you wondering what is happening inside your own painful and confusing marriage? I wrote another book just for you called Is It Me? Making Sense of Your Confusing Marriage: A Christian Woman's Guide to Hidden Emotional and Spiritual Abuse.My newest book, All the Scary Little Gods, is a spiritual memoir about healing from religious trauma and toxic programming. Flying Free is my online membership program designed for Christian women in emotionally abusive marriages. Whether you want to stay in your marriage or leave, we want to equip and support you through this program.Flying Higher is my online membership program for divorced Christian women. Come rebuild your life after divorce with women just like you. Bob Hamp is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist as well as an author and teacher. His life message has always been about freedom and healing. He and his wife, Polly, are the founders of Think Differently Academy, an online community for training, personal growth and healing. He and Polly have six kids and six grandkids with one more on the way.

Flying Free
When You've Been Hurt by Church [295]

Flying Free

Play Episode Listen Later Oct 1, 2024 66:48


Amy Byrd, a well-loved guest of the Flying Free Podcast, is back again to tell us the story behind her newest book, The Hope in Our Scars. It's not a pretty present of a book, wrapped in neat paper and topped with a bow. It's real, it's raw, and it's full of beauty, and that's exactly what this conversation is as well. Amy went through some unfathomable spiritual abuse and says, “That's what led me to write The Hope in Our Scars because I did find Christ intimately present with me through this.” We hope you'll be able to find hope and Christ in this conversation, too. Read the show notes and/or ask Natalie a question hereRelated Resources:Go listen to my first interview with Amy, “We Need a Sexual Reformation in the Church.” I highly encourage you to check out Amy's incredible books, including The Hope in Our Scars, The Sexual Reformation, Recovering from Biblical Manhood and Womanhood, Why Can't We Be Friends?, No Little Women, Theological Fitness, and Housewife Theologian.My newest book, All the Scary Little Gods, is a spiritual memoir about healing from religious trauma and toxic programming. Are you wondering what is happening inside your own painful and confusing marriage? I wrote another book just for you called Is It Me? Making Sense of Your Confusing Marriage: A Christian Woman's Guide to Hidden Emotional and Spiritual Abuse. Flying Free is my online membership program designed for Christian women in emotionally abusive marriages. Whether you want to stay in your marriage or leave, we want to equip and support you through this program.Flying Higher is my online membership program for divorced Christian women. Come rebuild your life after divorce with women just like you. 

Flying Free
Interpreting Toxic Texts [294]

Flying Free

Play Episode Listen Later Sep 24, 2024 34:27


Have you ever gotten a toxic text from a friend, a family member—maybe your spouse? The women in our Flying Free Kaleidoscope have the opportunity to post the toxic texts they receive so that we can help them process, and I came across one I just couldn't wrap my brain around, it was so incredibly full of toxicity and falsities. So today's episode is breaking down this particular abusive text that one of my members received, and honestly, it can actually be quite interesting once you get the hang of it. Come parse through this toxic texter's false beliefs and see how I would respond if I were the one getting this text. Read the show notes and/or ask Natalie a question hereRelated Resources:Read one of my favorite books, Forgiveness After Trauma, and listen in on an interview I did with the author, Susannah Griffith. Check out the article I mentioned by Christy Hemphill, “How Things Go Wrong with Metaphorical Reasoning in Ephesians 5.”Are you wondering what is happening inside your own painful and confusing marriage? I wrote another book just for you called Is It Me? Making Sense of Your Confusing Marriage: A Christian Woman's Guide to Hidden Emotional and Spiritual Abuse. My newest book, All the Scary Little Gods, is a spiritual memoir about healing from religious trauma and toxic programming. Flying Free is my private online education community designed for Christian women in emotionally abusive marriages. Whether you want to stay in your marriage or leave, we want to equip and support you through this community.Flying Higher is our educational community for divorced Christian women. 

Flying Free
Am I Being Emotionally Abused? [293]

Flying Free

Play Episode Listen Later Sep 18, 2024 42:02


Have you ever wondered, “Am I really being emotionally abused? Is it considered emotional abuse if my spouse is lying to me? Gaslighting me? Ignoring me? What are the kinds of mistreatments we can actually call ABUSE? My friend, this is a question I've been answering for other women for almost a decade now. This is my my life's work. My passion. Let me help guide you just a little bit in today's episode as we do a deep-dive on emotional abuse: what it is, how it destroys lives, and what we can do about it.Read the show notes and/or ask Natalie a question hereAre you wondering what is happening inside your own painful and confusing marriage? I wrote a book just for you called Is It Me? Making Sense of Your Confusing Marriage: A Christian Woman's Guide to Hidden Emotional and Spiritual Abuse. My newest book, All the Scary Little Gods, is a spiritual memoir about healing from religious trauma and toxic programming. Flying Free is my online membership program designed for Christian women in emotionally abusive marriages. Whether you want to stay in your marriage or leave, we want to equip and support you through this program.Flying Higher is my online membership program for divorced Christian women. Come rebuild your life after divorce with women just like you. 

Flying Free
Sick of Being Emotionally Stuck? This Changes Everything! [292]

Flying Free

Play Episode Listen Later Sep 10, 2024 46:00


Many years ago I paid $150 an hour for counseling. If you do the math, that comes down to $25 for every ten minutes of her time. Yes. I was paying $25 for someone else to listen to me for ten minutes. I would tell her what new horrors I had experienced the week before, and then she would validate and empathize with me, and then I would go home.That's expensive. $25 is a lot of money to pay for someone to listen to your troubles. And was it moving the dial in my life? Was it worth that $25 for those ten minutes that I was purchasing to change my life, to get me moving forward? Was I getting unstuck? Was I learning new things? After a year of seeing her for an hour every other week, because I couldn't afford to go every single week, I had spent $3,600 and I was still in the same place that I had been a year before. The only difference is that I had $3,600 less in my bank account. Can anyone else relate to this madness?I recently had a conversation with a group of Christian women about something that didn't cost them $75 or $100 or $150 an hour but that has changed the entire trajectory of their lives.Today you get to listen in on that conversation.I hated that I wasted so much money on something that not only got me nowhere but that set me back in my healing. I determined to help women in my shoes in a different way, and it would only cost them $29. Not for a few minutes. But for 438,000 minutes (that's one entire month) of having five coaches, including me, not only listen to you, but actually HELP you in your specific life with your specific circumstances. 438,000 minutes of access to powerful classes that will educate, train, and equip you to take the next best step in your life. 438,000 minutes of daily support whenever you need it to help you transform your thinking and change your life. Would that be worth it to you? I asked these women to share with you today why they think it's more than worth it. Why it's so worth it that they have been members for years. One said, “I actually still go to counseling and my counseling is 100% covered by insurance. So for me, my counseling is free, but I still feel like Flying Free coaching helps me more than my counseling sessions do.”I asked her why. Listen to find out! Read the show notes and/or ask Natalie a question hereRelated Resources:Wanna hear more about the money I wasted on trying to get help? Read my newest book, All the Scary Little Gods. It's a spiritual memoir about healing from religious trauma and toxic programming. Are you wondering what is happening inside your own painful and confusing marriage? I wrote another book just for you called Is It Me? Making Sense of Your Confusing Marriage: A Christian Woman's Guide to Hidden Emotional and Spiritual Abuse. Flying Free is my online membership program designed for Christian women in emotionally abusive marriages. Whether you want to stay in your marriage or leave, we want to equip and support you through this program.Flying Higher is my online membership program for divorced Christian women. Come rebuild your life after divorce with women just like you. 

Flying Free
The Deconstruction Books That Have Changed and Healed My Relationship With God [291]

Flying Free

Play Episode Listen Later Sep 3, 2024 38:02


Books are like buses. When you open up a book, it will take you to a new place. It will take you on a new adventure. Sometimes the book will take you on a journey of the imagination to a new country or a science fiction place. Sometimes the book will take you on a path of learning you've never explored before, and that path will lead you down other paths, and then those paths will lead you down even more paths, and you will be able to meander through information that delights your mind and opens you up to new ideas and ways of looking at the world. Books shape the way we think, feel, and show up in the world. They can even influence who we hang out with, who we agree or disagree with, and how we approach those agreements or disagreements. Books are important. They have just as much influence over us as people do because they are written by people with bias, people with their own programming, people with their own lived experience or lack thereof. Charlie Jones once wrote “Remember, you are the same today as you will be in five years, except for two things: the people you meet and the books you read. Choose both carefully.”When it comes to books about deconstruction, I've found some to be life-giving and hope-saturated, and I've found others to be depressing and hopeless. In today's episode, I talk about some of the books that have changed my life and my relationship with God. For the better! Read the show notes and/or ask Natalie a question hereRelated Resources:Books on books on books: Gaslighted by God: Reconstructing a Disillusioned Faith by Tiffany Yecke Brooks (and the podcast interview I did with her)Holy Ghosted: Spiritual Anxiety and Religious Trauma and the Language of Abuse by Tiffany Yecke Brooks (and the podcast interview I did with her)All the Scary Little Gods by Yours TrulyFaith Beyond Doubt: Why Your Beliefs Stopped Working and What to Do About It by Brian McLarenA Spiritual Evolution by John McMurrayLove Wins by Rob BellSearching for Sunday: Loving, Leaving, and Finding the Church - a memoir by the late Rachel Held EvansThe Sin of Certainty: Why God Desires Our Trust More Than Our "Correct" Beliefs by Peter EnnsThe Bible Tells Me So: Why Defending Scripture Has Made Us Unable to Read It by Peter EnnsHow the Bible Actually Works by Peter EnnsThe Making of Biblical Womanhood: How the Subjugation of Women Became Gospel Truth by Beth Allison BarrAttached to God by Krispin Mayfield (and the podcast interview I did with him)Christianity After Religion: The End of Church and the Birth of a New Spiritual Awakening By Diana Butler BassAre you wondering what is happening inside your own painful and confusing marriage? I wrote another book just for you called Is It Me? Making Sense of Your Confusing Marriage: A Christian Woman's Guide to Hidden Emotional and Spiritual Abuse. Flying Free is my online membership program designed for Christian women in emotionally abusive marriages. Whether you want to stay in your marriage or leave, we want to equip and support you through this program.Flying Higher is my online membership program for divorced Christian women. Come rebuild your life after divorce with women just like you. 

Flying Free
The Longings of Women [290]

Flying Free

Play Episode Listen Later Aug 27, 2024 53:02


We read an incredible book in our book club that is a part of Flying Higher, my program for divorced Christian women. This book healed me in ways I didn't expect, and I think the women in our book club would say the same.Our discussion on this book was so powerful that I just had to let you all listen to a portion of it, so that is what today's episode is all about!Read the show notes and/or ask Natalie a question hereRelated Resources:Check out the book we spent this whole episode talking about: The Book of Longings by Sue Monk Kidd.My newest book, All the Scary Little Gods, is a spiritual memoir about healing from religious trauma and toxic programming. Are you wondering what is happening inside your own painful and confusing marriage? I wrote another book just for you called Is It Me? Making Sense of Your Confusing Marriage: A Christian Woman's Guide to Hidden Emotional and Spiritual Abuse. Flying Free is my online membership program designed for Christian women in emotionally abusive marriages. Whether you want to stay in your marriage or leave, we want to equip and support you through this program.Flying Higher is my online membership program for divorced Christian women. Come rebuild your life after divorce with women just like you. 

Flying Free
What Is C-PTSD, and Do I Have It? Is It Me? [289]

Flying Free

Play Episode Listen Later Aug 20, 2024 39:46


“Do I have C-PTSD? Surely not—it's not like I was a prisoner of war or something.” If you're a victim of emotional abuse, you very well could have C-PTSD. In today's episode, I want to introduce you to C-PTSD, how emotional and spiritual abuse can cause C-PTSD, what the symptoms are, and some practical ways that you can move forward and heal if you determine that you do have C-PTSD. I also want to debunk the theory that many emotional abusers have that their victims have Borderline Personality Disorder. Let's dive in, shall we?Read the show notes and/or ask Natalie a question hereRelated Resources:Read the article I mentioned about complementarianism versus egalitarianism.My newest book, All the Scary Little Gods, is a spiritual memoir about healing from religious trauma and toxic programming. Are you wondering what is happening inside your own painful and confusing marriage? I wrote another book just for you called Is It Me? Making Sense of Your Confusing Marriage: A Christian Woman's Guide to Hidden Emotional and Spiritual Abuse. Flying Free is my online membership program designed for Christian women in emotionally abusive marriages. Whether you want to stay in your marriage or leave, we want to equip and support you through this program.Flying Higher is my online membership program for divorced Christian women. Come rebuild your life after divorce with women just like you. 

Flying Free
Hard Relationships With Our Parents and Our Adult Kids [288]

Flying Free

Play Episode Listen Later Aug 13, 2024 31:50


I've been busy doing all the things recently, so I wanted to give you all the inside scoop on what I've been up to. This includes going to an intense Personality Hacker conference, running a twelve-week coaching intensive, and helping women in the private forum (which is a part of the Flying Free program - we'd love to have you join us!) with some parenting quandaries. Read the show notes and/or ask Natalie a question hereRelated Resources:Check out the Personality Hacker website and their podcast. Episodes 243 and 244 are the ones I mention in today's episode, “Making Peace With Your Parents” parts 1 and 2.My newest book, All the Scary Little Gods, is a spiritual memoir about healing from religious trauma and toxic programming. Are you wondering what is happening inside your own painful and confusing marriage? I wrote another book just for you called Is It Me? Making Sense of Your Confusing Marriage: A Christian Woman's Guide to Hidden Emotional and Spiritual Abuse. Flying Free is my online membership program designed for Christian women in emotionally abusive marriages. Whether you want to stay in your marriage or leave, we want to equip and support you through this program.Flying Higher is my online membership program for divorced Christian women. Come rebuild your life after divorce with women just like you. 

Flying Free
Abusive Bible Counselors [287]

Flying Free

Play Episode Listen Later Aug 6, 2024 42:09


Have you ever dealt with a Bible counselor who just doesn't get it? Or maybe an elder from your church? Or have you ever been excommunicated from your church? Sister, I've been through all of the above, and I write about bits and pieces of it in my newest book, All the Scary Little Gods. In today's episode, I'm going to read three chapters from my book, and they all have to do with the different counselors and elders I dealt with during my emotionally abusive marriage. Grab your favorite beverage, and let me bring you into my world as we explore what can happen when you get Bible counseling for your abusive marriage. Read the show notes and/or ask Natalie a question hereRelated Resources:My newest book, All the Scary Little Gods, is a spiritual memoir about healing from religious trauma and toxic programming. Are you wondering what is happening inside your own painful and confusing marriage? I wrote another book just for you called Is It Me? Making Sense of Your Confusing Marriage: A Christian Woman's Guide to Hidden Emotional and Spiritual Abuse. Flying Free is my online membership program designed for Christian women in emotionally abusive marriages. Whether you want to stay in your marriage or leave, we want to equip and support you through this program.Flying Higher is my online membership program for divorced Christian women. Come rebuild your life after divorce with women just like you. 

Flying Free
Confession, Repentance, and Guilt, OH MY! [286]

Flying Free

Play Episode Listen Later Jul 30, 2024 28:05


Have you ever felt guilty about taking care of yourself? “I don't deserve to be taken care of, plus I have too many other responsibilities, how am I supposed to make time to take care of ME?!”Let me help dismantle this belief and show you that you do deserve some self-care, and, in fact, need it. I also received an interesting question in the Flying Free private forum about IFS (Internal Family Systems). This member wanted to know how she could accept and have compassion for her “bad” parts without ignoring sin in her life. Such a great question! Let's dig in!Read the show notes and/or ask Natalie a question hereRelated Resources:Want to learn more about IFS from a spiritual standpoint? Go grab Jenna Riemersma's book, Altogether You. My newest book, All the Scary Little Gods, is a spiritual memoir about healing from religious trauma and toxic programming…with an IFS twist!Are you wondering what is happening inside your own painful and confusing marriage? I wrote another book just for you called Is It Me? Making Sense of Your Confusing Marriage: A Christian Woman's Guide to Hidden Emotional and Spiritual Abuse. Flying Free is my online membership program designed for Christian women in emotionally abusive marriages. Whether you want to stay in your marriage or leave, we want to equip and support you through this program.Flying Higher is my online membership program for divorced Christian women. Come rebuild your life after divorce with women just like you. 

Flying Free
When the Abuse Survivor Has an Affair: Interview with Susan Estringel [285]

Flying Free

Play Episode Listen Later Jul 23, 2024 37:50


One of our listeners submitted a heavy question asking about how long she has to let the abuse continue. The snagging point? She had an affair. So, what does one do if they have an affair while in an emotionally abusive relationship? Does that mean they now deserve to be in an abusive marriage until they die? What are their options, and how can we think about this?Join my candid conversation with Susan Estringel, one of our coaches within the Flying Free program, as we untangle this situation and speak with compassion to those of you who have lived this reality. Read the show notes and/or ask Natalie a question hereRelated Resources:Connect with Susan on her website and on Instagram.My newest book, All the Scary Little Gods, is a spiritual memoir about healing from religious trauma and toxic programming. Are you wondering what is happening inside your own painful and confusing marriage? I wrote another book just for you called Is It Me? Making Sense of Your Confusing Marriage: A Christian Woman's Guide to Hidden Emotional and Spiritual Abuse. Flying Free is my online membership program designed for Christian women in emotionally abusive marriages. Whether you want to stay in your marriage or leave, we want to equip and support you through this program.Flying Higher is my online membership program for divorced Christian women. Come rebuild your life after divorce with women just like you. Susan Estringel is a Life and Relationship Coach, Yogi, and Music Therapist with a message of self-compassion and resilience. Drawing from her own journey as a survivor of emotional abuse, Susan brings a personal perspective to conversations around Christian abuse survivors having affairs. With a passion for lifting others up to find and reclaim their voice, Susan offers a unique blend of lived experience and professional expertise in navigating the complexities of healing after having an affair. She specializes in rewiring limiting beliefs, setting boundaries, and shedding the heavy burdens of shame and guilt associated with affairs.

Flying Free
God Doesn't Hate ALL Divorce [284]

Flying Free

Play Episode Listen Later Jul 16, 2024 33:12


“Does God really hate divorce? And why haven't my years of praying brought any fruit?” Abuse survivors ask me these two questions regularly, and today, I'm going to use Malachi 2:16 as well as a chapter from my newest book, All the Scary Little Gods, to answer them both. Beautiful butterfly, I pray this episode is an encouragement to you as you wrestle with these important topics. Read the show notes and/or ask Natalie a question hereRelated Resources:Links to resources about the idea that God hates divorceMy newest book, All the Scary Little Gods, is a spiritual memoir about healing from religious trauma and toxic programming. Are you wondering what is happening inside your own painful and confusing marriage? I wrote another book just for you called Is It Me? Making Sense of Your Confusing Marriage: A Christian Woman's Guide to Hidden Emotional and Spiritual Abuse. Flying Free is my online membership program designed for Christian women in emotionally abusive marriages. Whether you want to stay in your marriage or leave, we want to equip and support you through this program.Flying Higher is my online membership program for divorced Christian women. Come rebuild your life after divorce with women just like you. 

Flying Free
A Closer Look at Spiritual Abuse: Interview with Dan Koch

Flying Free

Play Episode Listen Later Jul 9, 2024 67:52


Joining me for today's fascinating episode is Dan Koch, podcaster and spiritual abuse researcher. Dan has created an incredible tool called the Spiritual Harm & Abuse Scale, and he breaks it down for us as we talk about spiritual abuse and the heavy impact it has on people's lives. Read the show notes and/or ask Natalie a question hereRelated Resources:Check out Dan's Spiritual Harm & Abuse Scale. Also mentioned in today's podcast episode was Dr. Keller's Spiritual Abuse Questionnaire. Connect with Dan on his website as well as Instagram. Listen to Dan's podcast, You Have Permission, and especially Episodes 10 and 123. Grab your copy of one of my favorite books, Faith Beyond Doubt. My newest book, All the Scary Little Gods, is a spiritual memoir about healing from religious trauma and toxic programming. Are you wondering what is happening inside your own painful and confusing marriage? I wrote another book just for you called Is It Me? Making Sense of Your Confusing Marriage: A Christian Woman's Guide to Hidden Emotional and Spiritual Abuse. Flying Free is my online membership program designed for Christian women in emotionally abusive marriages. Whether you want to stay in your marriage or leave, we want to equip and support you through this program.Flying Higher is my online membership program for divorced Christian women. Come rebuild your life after divorce with women just like you. Support the Flying Free podcast AND get in on monthly deep-dive discussions with podcast guests by joining the Flying Free Podcast Club for a $5 monthly donation HERE. (Members of Flying Free and Flying Higher can join these discussions FREE. Just reach out to me, natalie@flyingfreenow.com, and we'll get you set up!) Dan Koch is a licensed therapist in the state of Washington, the host of the You Have Permission Podcast and a spiritual abuse researcher who has developed the Spiritual Harm & Abuse Scale, currently in use by religious trauma clinicians around the world.