Podcasts about mo anderson

Recorded with a live audience, Linda and Pres McKissack roll out The Profit Share Advantage during a special book launch party in April 2025. The hosts are joined by none other than Mo Anderson! Inside the book, you'll learn the most effective way to sponsor between 15 to 150+ people a year into Keller Williams. The Profit Share Advantage reveals how Keller Williams agents can unlock financial freedom through the company's powerful profit share model. Regardless of your role within Keller Williams, this book breaks down a proven system anyone can follow to grow their downline and create long-term, residual income—without sacrificing your real estate business.  LET'S CONNECT:Subscribe on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/KWProfitShareMastery/?sub_confirmation=1Join the Masterclass: https://www.profitsharemastery.comGet a Profit Share Site: https://www.profitsharesites.comCONNECT WITH LINDA MCKISSACK:Linda's Website: https://www.lindamckissack.comLinda's Facebook: https://facebook.com/mckissacklindaLinda's Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mckissacklinda/

Former CEO of Keller Williams and all-around cultural icon, Mo Anderson, tells us how she went from being the daughter of poor tenant farmers to being one of the most influential and powerful leaders in real estate. We talk about the importance of mindset, workplace culture, and having faith. So take a listen and learn from one of the wisest, best storytellers of all time.Resources:Connect with Mo on LinkedInCheck out the Millionaire Real Estate Agent PlaybookConnect with Jason:LinkedinProduced by NOVA MediaThis podcast is for general informational purposes only. The guest's views, thoughts, and opinions represent those of the guest and not KWRI and its affiliates and should not be construed as financial, economic, legal, tax, or other advice. This podcast is provided without any warranty, or guarantee of its accuracy, completeness, timeliness, or results from using the information.

If you were with us in the last episode, you'll remember the insights and wisdom shared by none other than the legendary Mo Anderson. For those who are just tuning in, we had the absolute honor of interviewing Mo, a true icon in leadership and the first CEO of Keller Williams International. A trailblazer for female leaders and a member of the Oklahoma Hall of Fame, Mo's experiences and insights are nothing short of transformative.We're thrilled to bring you the second part of this exclusive interview, where we continue to explore Mo's heart-level approach to leadership. If you thought the first part was enlightening, brace yourself, as this part of the interview will change the way that you lead. We delve deeper into Mo's philosophy, uncovering more pearls of wisdom and practical insights to help you navigate your leadership journey.Resources:Learn more at herbestlife.comFollow Mo on Instagram: @mo_mentorshipConnect on Instagram:Seychelle Van Poole: @seychellevpSarah Reynolds: @sarahreynoldsojiWendy Papasan: @wendypapasanKymber Lovett-Menkiti: @kymbermenkitiTiffany Fykes: @tiffanyfykesProduced by NOVA Media

Get ready to be inspired and enlightened as we delve into an exclusive interview with a true leadership icon, Mo Anderson! Earlier this year, we had the absolute honor of bringing Mo into our space for the Her Leadership Life masterclass, and today, we're sharing this treasure trove of wisdom with you. Grab a pen and paper or open a new note on your phone, because you don't want to miss a moment of this insightful conversation.Can we just pause for a moment to appreciate Mo's monumental contribution to leadership? Back in 1995, when female CEOs were a rarity, with none on the Fortune 500 list, Gary Keller saw the potential in Mo and promoted her as the CEO of Keller Williams International. Shattering glass ceilings with grace and determination, Mo has blazed a trail for female leaders worldwide. And today, we get to learn from her!But that's not all. Mo is also the chairman of the board of KW Cares, a remarkable initiative that gives back to agents across the globe. And, showcasing her commitment to community and excellence, she holds a place in the Oklahoma Hall of Fame. We are beyond proud and excited to have her share her insights and experiences with us.In this episode, we're not just focusing on intellectual knowledge, but diving deep into heart-level wisdom. Mo's unique approach to leadership is both refreshing and transformative, something that every aspiring leader can learn from. So, eliminate distractions, get comfortable, and prepare yourself for a journey into the mind and heart of a legend in leadership.Resources:Learn more at herbestlife.comFollow Mo on Instagram: @mo_mentorshipConnect on Instagram:Seychelle Van Poole: @seychellevpSarah Reynolds: @sarahreynoldsojiWendy Papasan: @wendypapasanKymber Lovett-Menkiti: @kymbermenkitiTiffany Fykes: @tiffanyfykesProduced by NOVA Media

It's that time of year, meaning the Profit Share Virtual Summit is on the horizon. Linda and Pres run through the list of speakers and touch on what speakers and panelists may discuss at this year's Summit. From keynotes by Mo Anderson and Jason Abrams, to the return of favorites like Aaron Kaufman. This year's Summit also includes conversations with top performing Market Center leaders like Brian Kemp, Sue Adler, Andy Peters, and Loredana Ghete. Tune in and hear who else will be at this year's event! Finally, they introduce a new line of Profit Share Swag, which is available now. Profit from all orders placed between now and the end of the 2023 Profit Share Summit will go to KW Cares.Summit Tickets can be found at https://www.profitsharesummit.comSwag can be found at https://www.profitshareswag.com 

The youngest of five, born to tenant farmers in rural Oklahoma, Mo Anderson was the first in her family to earn a college degree.  She taught music in the public schools before entering the world of real estate.  Her first Century 21 franchise quickly rose to the third-highest producing out of 7,500 locations in North America.  She served on the Oklahoma Real Estate Commission, including 2 terms as chairman.   She convinced Keller Williams Realty Co-founder, Gary Keller, to expand his franchise company outside of Texas.  Anderson became the regional owner for Keller Williams Realty Oklahoma.  In 1995, Mo became the first CEO and co-owner of Keller Williams Realty International.  The Company is now the number one Real Estate Franchise company in the world in size, units, and volume.  She currently serves as Vice Chairman of the Board.  Deemed one of America's top 25 Influential Thought Leaders by REALTOR magazine and One of Real Estates Most Influential People, Anderson continues to cultivate the firm's culture, inspiring many thousands of agents around the world to maintain high standards of character. A member of the OK Hall of Fame (class of 2018), Mo is the author of A Joy-filled Life: Lessons from a Tenant Farmer's Daughter Who Became a CEO. Anderson's greatest legacy will be her philanthropic giving.  Her local community, charitable organizations, and ministries around the world have been richly blessed by her belief that the higher purpose of business is to give, care and share. The Moorhead Team is excited to bring you information about investing in real estate in the Central Texas area! More information can be found at our website at www.themoorheadteam.com and our YouTube page The Moorhead Team. We're always aiming to bring you great free content about investing in real estate in Austin, TX!

Mo Anderson shares her inspirational story outlined in her book, "A Joy Filled Life: Lessons from a Tenant Farmers Daughter," and her underlying foundation of high standards, integrity and philanthropy.

Are you ready to learn from some of the most successful business leaders in the real estate industry? Join us as we discuss our experience at the Keller Williams Family Reunion in 2023. From late-night networking to powerful quotes from industry icons like Mo Anderson, the first female CEO of Keller Williams, this episode is packed with valuable insights on resilience and well-being. Plus, we share tips on how to love on your database and build market share through consistency and execution. Tune in now to learn how to implement these strategies in your own business and take your success to the next level!Connect on Instagram:Seychelle Van Poole: @seychellevpSarah Reynolds: @sarahreynoldsojiWendy Papasan: @wendypapasan

Activist-educator Cara Tuttle Bell is a trained attorney and powerful speaker on sexual harassment and assault prevention. Her work on college campuses dealing with sexual harassment and assault inspired her to train women on how to build assertiveness. She says it is crucial to communication, personal safety, and overall wellbeing. Cara also gives workshops on speaking with authority in salary negotiations, relationships, and work meetings. Her new book "Drowning in Timidity: Women, Politeness, and the Power of Assertive Living" is a must-read, especially for those who think being assertive is synonymous with being aggressive.    In this episode Dr. mOeand Cara discuss these topics: How to be direct without being aggressive Practicing salary negotiation Sexual Harassment in corporate America Why children must be taught assertiveness Bystander intervention in assault prevention Handling sexual misconduct in schools Moral courage, trauma-informed training and more... Visit Cara's website and connect with her online @caratuttlebell today! Transcript (auto generated) [00:00] Cara Tuttle Bell: I also hope that we can move away from this very gendered and loaded idea of assertiveness and understand it for what it really is, which is just being direct, being clear, being fair, considering the competing interests that might be in a meeting or a conversation and engaging equitably with one another. [00:27] Dr. mOe Anderson: Hey, everybody. Welcome to Perpetual Motion, a podcast focused on wellness, personal growth, culture, and relationships. Positive relationships. I'm your host, Dr. Mo Anderson. Bestselling author, award winning podcast host, keynote speaker, and speaker coach. Sometimes I interview expert guests, like today, and sometimes I do a solo show. But my goal is always the same I want to help you. Yes, you review, renew, and re you at the end of each show. I hope you have learned something that will elevate you to the next level of success. If you're new to the show or a returning visitor, let's make this official. Click that subscribe button to be notified of new episodes as soon as they are available. Also, help us grow and reach more listeners by raiding the show and leaving a comment. Just type a little bit. Just a little something, something. All right, stay tuned, because today my special guest is Kara Tuttle Bell. She is a powerful speaker on sexual harassment and assault prevention. What do we need? Some powerful speakers on that. And she also is an expert on why assertiveness is a crucial component of communication, personal safety, and overall wellbeing, she's got a great book. She's the author of Drowning, intimid, Politeness and the Power of a Certain Living. I'll be right back with Kara Tuttle Bell. You can't say Dr. Mo aintellya the fear might suffer the consequences winter's a failure what are you scared of? Why aren't you afraid? I'd rather live like I'm dying to live and die in the day my heart is pure my soul is safe tara, welcome to Perpetual Motion. [02:35] Cara Tuttle Bell: Hi. Thank you so much for having me today. [02:37] Dr. mOe Anderson: This is exciting. I haven't had a guess with your background or for this particular topic. I mean, assertiveness as part of communication is not something that we really think about. In fact, women get criticized for that a lot when they can just be the same way as a guy. And also, sexual harassment, I don't know if it's on the rise or we're talking about it more, but these are such important topics, and I'm glad you're here to help us understand better. Let's start with assertiveness. Why do we need to be more assertive? [03:11] Cara Tuttle Bell: I really hope that we can reclaim assertiveness. I think there are so many reasons that we need to show up and assert ourselves, both for ourselves and for others. I also hope that we can move away from this very gendered and loaded idea of assertiveness and understand it for what it really is, which is just being direct, being clear, being fair. Considering the competing interests that might be in a meeting or a conversation and engaging equitably with one another and I. [03:46] Dr. mOe Anderson: Hope we can as well. And I don't know the history behind it, but I just think about women who run for office or women who are in positions of authority and it seems like they just held to a whole another standard when it comes to confidence and communication. Do you know the origin of that? Is it just the role of women evolving or what the heck? [04:12] Cara Tuttle Bell: I mean, I think we are in the midst of it. I think we are watching this play out. Unfortunately, there are still too few women in these historically maledominated spaces so they remain judged and evaluated by old fashioned norms about male behavior and what we thought male leadership is and male courage looks like and really white male visions of that in most industries, but especially politics, as you mentioned. I think it is very hard for them to walk this tightrope or strike the right balance and get evaluated in the same way. I mean, they're just not we hear it on the news, we see it in the comment section of websites. You see it in headline after headline. You see it on Twitter where women are being judged more harshly for engaging directly, for having stances and opinions, which of course they do. And we should welcome that because I think a lot of people are confusing assertiveness and aggression. [05:19] Dr. mOe Anderson: Yes. And that's what we're getting to. And as you said, that what came to mind is even the subtle ways that this plays out. Even when I hear I'm a speaker, you're a speaker. But I'll hear other speakers so often when they quote someone famous, it's always what Patton said, what Lincoln said, what Ray. I hear women at events for women, women speakers and events from women and they don't have one single quote or statistics or anything from another female or for that matter, from even someone of another culture. I'll go out of my way to try to find something from someone in India or Canada or Australia and it's so ingrained that I think some people don't even recognize that they're doing it before a woman speaker. To give an hour speech and never quote a woman. It just blows my mind. [06:17] Cara Tuttle Bell: It does mine too. I completely agree. And I hope others can work intentionally to really diversify their message and their program and their slides and their images. I mean, you have to do the work and a lot of it is internalized. So I know that we're all busy and these women's speakers are probably like, I've got this presentation tomorrow and they may be finalizing their slides, but it's worth doing, right? It's worth doing because so many people are watching and listening. Now, granted, we are trying to make up for these huge gaps in education, right? Especially like in public education in the US. You probably were taught about a lot of men a lot of military generals, we see a lot of quotes from men's sports coaches as well. They're always a go to. These things are much more present in our mind because we're surrounded by those messages. We get them from day one. I mean, everywhere you go in a restaurant, church is off and on. Church, male leaders. So it's like we've been surrounded by male leadership in a lot of different spaces for the bulk of our lives and we've made so much progress, but we're still working to get towards equity. We haven't landed there yet, so we got to do some of this work of undoing to really be better at inclusion. Right? So it's like diversity and inclusion and belonging, which means we got to correct for the past, we got to address those lingering effects of that kind of socialization. And I mean, I do think asserting ourselves in these spaces, whether it's work, our professional relationships, our community works, our churches, is part of that work. It's part of the action that we can take. [08:06] Dr. mOe Anderson: Right. Very good point. And back to what you said earlier, which leads to my next question. What is the difference between being assertive and aggressive? Because I think a lot of people confuse the two. [08:22] Cara Tuttle Bell: I agree. I think we see both and it can be gendered. We have lots of good studies on this. We are just judging women more harshly. But when you look at these things foundationally, like, what does this mean? What is the definition of these words, then? Aggression? Is that steam rolling? Is that coming at something with force? It could be an abuse of power. It can be physical, it can be verbal, it can be using or depriving someone of resources. It's that misuse and abuse that becomes aggression. Right? It can be violent, it can be the unhealthy expression of anger. I'm actually fine with anger because I'll probably come up in some other answers. [09:10] Dr. mOe Anderson: But we don't want to be constructive or destructive. [09:13] Cara Tuttle Bell: It depends, right? It depends how you use it. I don't want us to live in it so much that we're bitter, but I want to harness anger as fuel so that we have that extra boost of energy to assert ourselves. Asserting yourself means you're showing up, you're being present, you're participating, and that varies. You're participating appropriate to your role in the workplace. You're participating on a committee that you're assigned to. You should be doing the work you're being asked to do and doing it fairly. So there's nothing wrong when I go to a meeting with asserting my own ideas, the agenda, my office and what I'm responsible for, and having that open conversation about whatever the decision is right. [10:02] Dr. mOe Anderson: And how we should make it, advocate for ourselves yes. [10:05] Cara Tuttle Bell: And what we should consider. And then it just sits there. It doesn't mean the other person has that obligation to receive it. But I'm showing up and engaging directly and fairly and equitably. So that, to me, is an assertive communication, which differs from really, if you think of, like, an 80s Wall Street type of movie that American, like, I'm going to call my way to the top dog approach. That's really the misuse of that. That's taking it too far. That's aggressive and it's inequitable, right? [10:38] Dr. mOe Anderson: You made me think about I'm glad you said that anger is okay sometimes because I'm here in the south, and we still have a lot of Southern belle mentality, and even when you are slicing and dicing somebody, you need to be smiling and offering them tea as they die. So many things. I had a couple of folks that I was mentoring at a previous company, and they came here from the East Coast, and they were just having such problems with clients because they were just going in just being normal, really being normal, but not the Southern way. And I was like, hey, you're going to have to and this wasn't male or female, but they were female, so they were getting it double. Like, people aren't responding. I was like, you got to go in this way. You got to come in real low and smooth. You got to ask about their children. We cannot just sit down and start talking about business. We got to drink and eat a little bit. There's so many cultural things in a dish. And then you throw these gender stereotypes and biases on top of oh, my God, it makes me weary sometimes. [11:53] Cara Tuttle Bell: It can be exhausting. And this is why I always talk about politeness, because when I'm talking about assertiveness or Serbia training a lot of women and you're right about south, right? It's a different audience sometimes a lot of Southern women in particular are a little resistant. Part of them wants to embrace assertiveness, and then they're like, but it feels too confrontational. It feels unladylike. I mean, I hear these things from them, and I'm like, okay, that word exactly. [12:24] Dr. mOe Anderson: I know you here. [12:30] Cara Tuttle Bell: It is. It's like, why wouldn't we just be pleasant and don't want to create conflict? We like to smooth things out. I'm currently in the south, and we just have to talk through it. And so I'm like, Listen, I'm all for polite behavior, but I'm really for kindness, right? We should be kind to other humans and patient and all of those things, but not to a fault. Not when it keeps us engaging, not when it keeps us from addressing injustice, not when it means that we're always minding our business while harm after harm and types of discrimination keep occurring. Not when it keeps us from having healthy relationships. So this people pleasing or fear of any sort of discomfort or conflict is the root of so many problems, personal and structural, societal. So I really am always advocating for us to bring assertiveness well beyond your salary negotiation conversation. That's when I think people think, okay, I can visit it for five minutes. I can be assertive for this moment in my life that comes maybe every three to five years, and I'm just going to cram for it, too. They just think, give me a script, I'm going to cram for this the night before. And listen, I'll help you with salary negotiation. I will, okay? So you can come to me for the last minute cramming session. But that's not skill building, right? That's like faking until you make it. That's like, I hope you can be assertive and hold for two minutes the next day when you have the conversation, but probably not because you're not practicing this on a daily basis, and it feels too hard when we make it infrequent and high stakes. And so this is about something that really, I think people should embrace as daily practice. It's self care. It's setting boundaries. It's maintaining those boundaries. It helps us have healthy relationships, and it helps us also be really in touch with those times when people are trying to violate our boundaries, where I want you to have anger, I want you to be in touch with that feeling when it comes up for you so you know what it means, but then harness it for maximum impact. And so that's where the anchor is fine. The anger is probably valid. I mean, there's so many valid reasons to be outraged right now. There's so many. But what are we going to do with that, right? Because I don't want people to live in bitterness and resentment. That's the same outcome of not engaging assertively. That's what happens when people are passive or passive aggressive, is that they're holding onto it. So for me, assertiveness is this balance that helps us be healthy on a daily basis and fair. [15:23] Dr. mOe Anderson: I like that you make that point about clients trying to come to you for the last minute. They come to me with their speeches at the last minute. Like delivering communication is a lifestyle. It's a way of life. It's kind of hard to get to that keynote level in a night. And I would think with salary negotiating, too, with what I think I've seen with people who try that cramming type of thing, is that they overcorrect and all of a sudden they're like, and this is what I wait a minute, what is going on? I can't even hear what you're saying because I don't know you. Who are you anyway? [16:00] Cara Tuttle Bell: It is a burst. It is because it's really like they are really trying to summon up the courage. And so it does come up too quickly, too strong. And then I also see people who just can't hold their position. So even if they can say the two sentences that they've memorized to make the ask, they then undo it with that need for pleasantry, if that's okay with you. Exactly. [16:25] Dr. mOe Anderson: You don't mind, and I'm sorry, and. [16:27] Cara Tuttle Bell: If you think it's okay exactly. Yeah. [16:35] Dr. mOe Anderson: I want this. We got to fix this quickly because I got a granddaughter and I want something different for her. Absolutely. All of the young women there's so much going on, as you said, and we're not going to get into that. But this is pressing, clear and pressing issue. Let's go to being assertive. And I'm just guessing you're the expert on this. Sexual harassment is a problem. It's something you have some expertise in and it's a lingering problem. And I think I'm wondering if being timid as well, in no way am I ever trying to make a woman at thought about anything. But if assertiveness when you talk about your safety and well being, if that can in some ways help you with that. But let's just talk about let's start with why in Twin. Is sexual harassment still Jeffrey Epstein a problem? [17:39] Cara Tuttle Bell: It is. And people ask me this a lot. This is my day job, right? This is the kind of compliance job that I have. So I'm trained as a lawyer and I work on a college campus. And so I'm addressing sexual harassment and assault all day, every day and have for the past eight plus years. And I am very passionate about it and become very assertive. And that's like both the personal and professional journey. I used to be. Shy. Law school really helps. But you also can practice, right? A lot of it had to be a willingness to do the practice. So I wasn't born this way. For your listeners, like, definitely this can be learned. I know it can be because I'm sitting here as the proof and the outrage that I have over the issue helps. Right? I mean, the outrage helps. The anger helps. I try to turn it into fuel to push me through the day, to be able to then bring it in a meeting or whatever it is that I'm working on addressing. And what we think in the field is that we're not seeing like a new epidemic. We're just seeing increased awareness, increased reporting of what has for a very long time been very high levels of this type of discrimination and heart. And it is everywhere you look, it is more common in male dominated professions. And you can look for data on this. This is business data, this is insurance policy data. The more there is a disparity in a profession, the more men outnumber women, the more incidents we have. And it's been this way for a long time, the more vulnerable a person in a role is. And that can be geographic isolation, that can be low pay, that can be low influence or authority in the position. That can be the seasonal nature of a position. Whatever it is, it isn't. Giving them security in a position in relation to other people makes them more likely to experience this type of harm. So it remains prevalent because inequity is prevalent and it's connected to the other forms of discrimination. So where you have racism and ableism and transphobia and homophobia and other types of discrimination you're going to also have gender harassment, sexism misogyny, sexual harassment and sexual assault. Now where assertiveness comes in is that the current best practice that we're trying to implement really across the board k through twelve schools it's been in the military they're introducing in churches. I think we're going to see this more and more across corporate America definitely has taken hold in higher ed is by teaching what's called bystander intervention training and that's because we're all bystanders like it or not I mean we're just here navigating the world and you choose and it is a choice whether to be an active or a passive. Bystander now a lot of us were raised to mind our own business. A lot of us worry about the risks of speaking up or of standing. [21:06] Dr. mOe Anderson: Out sometimes and that boys will be boys thing. [21:10] Cara Tuttle Bell: Oh and then the tolerance yes I. [21:12] Dr. mOe Anderson: Had some incidents and it was just blown off like that's just part of it yes and go out of the dark kind of thing like your right. [21:24] Cara Tuttle Bell: We still hear a lot of blaming for the target they're responsible for receiving the harassment and so where I am glad and can promise that there's been progress is a lot of the prevention messages are not so sexist anymore I mean they were they were just sexist application. They were saying women do this to prevent your own assault and we weren't having when I was in college corresponding messaging given to the male students who all of the data suggests are much more likely to be engaging in perpetration regardless of the gender identity of the victim. So men are from all the data we have and that's across fields so it's criminal justice data, psychology, sociology, women's studies that's not actually in dispute. So we haven't realistically confronted the problem for some time but the public health model now is recommending that we teach a lot of bystander intervention and we are so it is now routine practice at colleges and universities in the United States more and more often showing up yes since like 2014 so they're supposed to be doing it. If anyone has any questions, please feel free to reach out. But we're doing it and it's teaching you some strategies. If you see something, say something but it's also giving you choices. So not everyone has to swoop in like a superhero or be loud or address something directly. They can also create a distraction. You can delegate to someone who's better able or who has authority to try to respond when appropriate. We need to think broadly about delegation so it's not necessarily always law enforcement that we're calling it's what's appropriate for the situation. Right. So sometimes it's me like on campus people can call me because it's my job to go do these things and so if someone feels like they don't know what to say or they don't know what to do, who can you take with you? Who can you delegate to? How can you document something? Documentation, we're seeing having really transformative and activist power in recent years, helping us really confront some harsh realities and prove to the doubters some things that a lot of us knew were happening. So sometimes documentation from afar is the thing we can do safely to address an issue. And that takes some nerve too, right? So all of these things we're hoping to equip people to choose from if they are in the midst of situations at risk for sexual harassment or assault, but it can apply to all forms of discrimination. [24:17] Dr. mOe Anderson: What bothers me with the documentation is in the form of a video. If that falls into that category, is when people are just filming just for the purpose of posting and entertaining and not get help. That is just appalling filming women being raped, assaulted and me. And two, to be clear, this cannot just happen to women assault and harassment. Although, as you said, the data shows, it is for adults predominantly going to be women. But are they teaching them that documentation needs to go somewhere and not just post it and hope somebody sees it? Because that's scary to me. [25:02] Cara Tuttle Bell: It is scary. So I'm always making that qualifier. We know that college students consume a lot of video content from some popular sites. And so just quite directly, I'm like, this is not for that. That is not what we're asking you to do. Consent is really key when we're talking about sexual misconduct. Like consent is key. So if you're filming something without someone's consent and you're posting it somewhere without their consent and you're sharing it without consent, you are part of the problem. That's also increasingly illegal, right? So they shouldn't be sharing social content. So yes, I think that is a very important part of the conversation that cannot be left out. I don't care how long the training is running. It's like if you're going to mentioned documentation, you've got to put those really important caveats around it because that's what came to mind. [25:57] Dr. mOe Anderson: And even I believe it's illegal almost everywhere now to post pics the revenge posting of some intimate photo or whatever that was sent to you. And I'm happy that law enforcement and our lawmakers are stepping up, but again, we're looking at largely male populations to make these decisions. So that speaking up and getting involved in folks like you being there to help make this transition is so important. And I was thinking about as well too, to go back to harassment being a lingering problem. We're talking about learned behavior, confidence and being assertiveness. Isn't this sexual harassment? Learned behavior? I can't imagine. I mean, I have two sons. They didn't come here like that. And then heaven forbid that's going on. But from the movies, to their peers, to whatever is of course enough. Do we have to attack all of these industries, magazines and music and everything? Not attack, but you know what I'm saying. [27:05] Cara Tuttle Bell: You know what you mean. It is very concerning, right? Because young people are always getting so many different messages is contradictory messages, right? And so even if they're raised one way, they could then land in a peer environment where they're getting reinforcement on a lot of negative behaviors. And this is true across the board. This could be drug use. This could be alcohol misuse. This could be for like, how they engage in sexual practices. Do they bully and harass people? So that peer dynamic pushes some young people into behaviors they otherwise normally wouldn't engage in on their own. And they tell us that, right? I mean there's really fascinating research on these topics and getting them to display some moral courage, some assertiveness, that's really tough. That is really tough. So we got to really pull it apart. We work through scenarios. We talked to a lot of them about what leadership is because many of them want to be a leader in some capacity and they want to skip over the work, right? They want to just graduate and be like a successful millionaire entrepreneur in their twenty s. And we're talking about like, what skills aren't you practicing and developing? Particularly these students who have been in the home environment, so they didn't have the social experience of the past few years due to COVID on college campuses, we are seeing a developmental delay. I mean, we are like it is not the same incoming class that we had prepandemic in the interpersonal communication skills. So it really did feel like we had these young students kind of just unleashed once some of the restrictions were lifted and they were coming to us with different questions. I don't like my roommate. I don't know how to navigate this conflict, whether it's conflict or laundry or deciding where to eat in a group. So they're just asking us really basic social questions and for tips that they thought they were past at least a few years ago. Now, I always thought they had room for improvement, but it wasn't such a basic level. So I'm very concerned about their ability to engage in sexual communication, ensure that consent is a part of those things, or know and honor resistance and discomfort when they're seeing it. I mean, people are not really teaching them this consistently. So we don't have consistent sex ed in this country. It really depends where they are. A lot of schools are afraid and that's because the parents complain about the type of content. So I very rarely see a college student who has what I would want them to have had before they get to college, which would be medically accurate. Information about their body, the bodies of others. Consent, education boundaries, warning signs of unhealthy relationships. What constitutes stating violence or exploitation, sexual exploitation, a lot of which that like coercion and blackmailing can occur with phones, pictures, and videos now, because otherwise they get here. And people in jobs like mine, we will try to do what we can, but a lot of times they're 18 when they get here. Right. So we've got to engage in some unlearning to try to then relearn or teach them new skills. And, no, they're not getting enough time with me. They're with their peers most of all. And dosage is key. [30:56] Dr. mOe Anderson: Micro dosage. [31:02] Cara Tuttle Bell: We got to talk about what they're learning. Right. And with the availability of online ***********, are they learning more from **** because they're not getting sex at in schools? That is concerning to me. So then it's not surprising when they're reenacting things they saw online and they tell us stuff like, oh, I think they like that. And I'm like, you can't assume everybody likes that. [31:28] Dr. mOe Anderson: That woman or that man is paid. [31:34] Cara Tuttle Bell: It's all about consent. Yeah. We have to help them unpack these things a little bit and work through it. And you touched on this earlier, and this is really important to say is some assertiveness does deter some bad behavior. Not all. Okay. There's always going to be people who are trying to violate our boundaries and trying to cause harm, who are trying to take advantage of a situation so we can't prevent everything. [32:04] Unknown Speaker: Exactly. [32:04] Cara Tuttle Bell: But there is research to support that strong articulation of boundaries. Clear resistance does disrupt and deter some behavior. It may not prevent them from harming someone else, which I understand. They might then just choose another target. But it is worth a try when we think we're in a situation to nip something in the bud early on. Right. And especially if we're talking about sexual harassment in the workplace. Right. Because if the behavior continues and you get to a place where you're going to want to report it or seek some support, they're going to ask if you were clear about your boundaries. They're going to ask the question, did you tell them this makes you uncomfortable? And no, you shouldn't have to. They should just not commit the harm. I agree with you completely. None of this should be happening. But it is happening, and it's happening often. So I do want to just give people as many tools as possible to be able to reduce harm, appease when that's the best choice for safety or extricate yourself from a situation. [33:18] Dr. mOe Anderson: Kara, what about this? I'm thinking about the gymnasts mobiles and others. I mean, they did everything. They reported it. They went to the authorities. I think they went to the FBI. Oh, my goodness. It honestly makes me think about discrimination with African Americans back with the Tulsa Race rides and everything. Who do you turn to when the people coming for you are the people who are supposed to protect you or the people who are. Ignoring it are the authorities. [33:51] Cara Tuttle Bell: It is true and it is so discouraging, okay? Not every human resources department or law enforcement department, these people who are supposed to be who you can turn to, clearly that's not consistently available or going to guarantee success. I mean, very few times can I offer the people I'm working with anything that feels like justice. And that's really disappointing, right? Because a lot of us are raised to have faith in the systems and these procedures. We build trust like that. You hope that your company cares about you, especially if you've worked there for 20 years. We get so many messages about how we care about all these issues, yet when people value submissions, yes, the statements are lovely, but you got to back that up with action. And I know that sometimes the supportive person is hard to find, but I do know because this is my professional network, right? These are the conferences I go to. There are hundreds or thousands of us who do care, and they may not be at your company, okay? They may not be. And a good indication is, look up your sexual misconduct policy. Is it from has anyone updated it since? [35:08] Dr. mOe Anderson: How would you know? Because they'll change the bottom of the document. They'll change the footer on the front page when you look at it. Can you tell from the content that this is not current with our culture and our beliefs now? [35:26] Cara Tuttle Bell: Yes. Right, because a wave of activism on this was in the early to mid 90s, really prompted by Anita Hills testimony during the Clarence Thomas confirmation hearing. So that was the Wake up call for America phase one. And sadly, a lot of the work stopped then. So my college students, when they go get at their next job, the ones who maintain contact with us or who took my class, they do things like look up the policy and when was the last time the committee met and what would I do if I experienced sexual harassment in the workplace? And some of them are pretty activist and they ask these questions at the interview. That is risky. You may not get the job offer if you're showing yourself to be what might be perceived as a troublemaker at the interview. But if you care too much about some of these causes that could make the employer nervous, it would be better. [36:21] Dr. mOe Anderson: To know then that HR might be the very person you have to go to. [36:29] Cara Tuttle Bell: Yes, you and I are on the same page. I'm like, there is another job. I promise you there's another job. Sometimes the students are so worried, but I'm like, you need to be interviewing them just as much as they are interviewing you. These are signs. They are telling you whether or not this is going to be a healthy or a toxic or replaced culture, whether or not they're going to cover for people or actually address the things that are happening. But if you can't find it at your school or in your church or at your place of employment, do some Internet research, because there are many nonprofit organizations, regionally, nationally, I'd help anyone find them. There are attorneys who take things pro bono. There are all sorts of resources now to help people across industries. It is sometimes hard to find them, but I know that they're there. I know that they're there because those of us who have experienced these things and have had help now want to extend that help to others because the support is not consistently available. [37:32] Dr. mOe Anderson: No, it's not. But there are so many who have, myself included, being victims of sexual harassment. And I think, in addition to Anita Hill, I feel like Tyrone Burke's Me Too movement, even though it's come under a lot of criticism. And yes, there have been people accused for everything who may have been innocent, even Child Protective Services. There's always going to be that small percentage. But Kara I was at after that happened, and people don't realize she had been talking about that for a while and had that hashtag made too, for some years before it got retweeted following the Harvey Weinstein thing. Weinstein weinstein. And I remember being with some girlfriends. We'd gone to a movie and everybody was talking about hashtag me too. And afterwards we were talking and we got to talking about it. And these were professional women over about six of us. And every single one of us had been a victim of sexual harassment and sexual assault. And none of us were in a position that we felt we can do anything about it and have any support. And that was just it took me weeks just to get over that revelation, because you kind of go around just thinking it's just you like perhaps those young gymnasts were doing, not realizing how many people were being victimized. And we kind of cried together. And when you don't deal with it too, just the post traumatic stress of just being there, and some of that resentment, anger, and explosiveness that it happened and that you weren't able to deal with it. So in addition to you guys teaching these courses and you being there as an advocate, an attorney, a trained attorney, is there also counseling now? Are there more mental health services? [39:29] Cara Tuttle Bell: Yes, we're seeing just a dramatic expansion across higher ed, which is good and overdue around all kinds of counseling and well being. Right. So we'll see a center for student wellbeing, you'll see expanded staff and many more culturally relevant and sensitive trainings and staff to surf particular populations. If you look at the hiring, you just see it everywhere, like in many, many states, that there are so many jobs because this is an urgent issue on college campuses, not just sexual assault, but I mean, the mental health and well being concerned. And yes, right. So if someone were to connect with us, we offer them a menu of services. They can work with victim advocates or they can go to the counseling center. And there's some specialization and sexual trauma or aspects of identity that they can seek out. A provider who they feel comfortable with, who they think gets their experience, but also understands what they're processing. We have yoga, we have meditation, we have study skills, we have financial education that can be necessary. A lot of places have hardship funds, student health. So our medical providers have a lot more understanding of sexual trauma, childhood sexual abuse, because those exams, like the exams you're touching the body, I mean, that can be very triggering for a survivor. And consent is just important in providing information. So everything that I'm seeing is getting more trauma informed. The progress is just slower than any of us would like. Law enforcement also has been getting more trauma informed training over the years. A lot of assumptions about doing the work, which led to really a lot of dismissal of some of the reports because if they interview a sexual assault victim in the immediate aftermath trauma, she's still in the space of trauma. Trauma disrupts memory encoding, like how our brain is storing them and putting them together. So it would be difficult while we're in fight or flight, we're in the adrenaline surge. These things last for days, not just minutes and hours. And so they've learned that conducting open ended interviews after three to five sleep cycles is actually much more likely to produce a coherent narrative with fewer gaps. [42:13] Dr. mOe Anderson: I know for a long time they just kind of thought you just get to them right away, they're going to start making up stuff or imagining stuff or they'll forget. But you're saying the memory can actually oh, that's for the person experiencing that, that's horrible too. But with time it sounds like it's kind of scattered pieces and you can start putting it together a little better. [42:38] Cara Tuttle Bell: You can. And if alcohol is involved and often is not always, but alcohol consumption, whether voluntary or used to commit the crime, that further disrupts that memory consolidation and encoding. And so really sleep and being in a safe environment and emergency rooms aren't always feeling safe. They're like hectic and loud and there's people in and out. So conducting an interview, even with good intentions, even when they want to get the information to try to go try to get the offender as quickly as possible, was not producing good results. So we're seeing new approaches being adopted here and there. Again, it's not everywhere. And I would like it to be, to do things like the forensic experiential trauma interview, that's one called Fetty, where it's training them to build rapport, create a really safe condition so it doesn't feel like we're interrogating a victim, ask open ended questions, let them go where they want to go, right? Because the brain is navigating through fear and trauma and that's not linear and it's not going to be linear but at the end of the conversation or several conversations it should be the job of that investigator to put that story together. So we were really often are making the person who experienced the harm be the crime scene and then do all of the work of reconstructing the narrative and that was just not the best way to get at the information. That's really what we now know about the brain and trauma has really changed the approach in ways that better equip any type of investigator who understands this is the neurobiology of trauma who has this training to ask better questions and get a better narrative and since what we're talking about is often word against word that narrative is crucially important. Sometimes there's corroborating evidence but a lot of times there isn't and so getting that good account from the person who was harmed is tough work but it's. [44:44] Dr. mOe Anderson: Tough work worth doing right and not being dismissed. The big message here, whatever age you are is that there are people out there who will help you, who can help you and systematically it hasn't always been the case and there's still going to be some of the old attitudes and processes out there but don't give up. I mean we're seeing things coming out now about and I don't want to keep naming organizations but just people who were children, male and female and things happen and they're just now getting restitution, getting justice and we don't want to see that anymore. [45:24] Cara Tuttle Bell: No, it takes a long time and it's very important to acknowledge that these harms and this discrimination occurs across identity, right? So it occurs across gender. Identity occurs in all communities whether you're class level and across race. We do know that there's disproportionate impact, right? That some people have more vulnerable characteristics that let them be targeted and also that let them justice system then fail them than others. So absolutely none of this is fair and consistent across the board but help is available if you know where to look and if you don't know where to look reach out to me and I will help you. There are people who will help you find it. [46:10] Dr. mOe Anderson: Thank you for that. We're going to give your information to in the show notes and when we get to the end but before we do I want to know we're talking about assertiveness but how do we if we're not naturally that way unbelievably? I'm not a natural extrovert people have a hard time believing I'm not really but I had to learn it because I was trying to get run over but how can we learn? I mean I just went at it and role model somebody but was better, more systematic. I practiced until it became second nature but what's the more strategic or what is the recommended way to learn assertiveness? And I want to couch that in two ways. One is I've got young people around me. How do I teach them assertiveness in my kind little Southern bobble beltway so that they don't get in trouble at school, but also for people that it's not their nature. And there are a lot of adults, male and females, who just don't want trouble. They just rather not see anything. [47:17] Cara Tuttle Bell: I know it's hard to start, okay? It's hard. And it will feel painful. It will. And I didn't know there were tools around when I was doing it. And so I was like, you have to jump in this conversation. It really was faking it until you make it. But now I know that there are lots of books. There are now. A lot of them came out in the 70s. That's where we saw the debut of assertiveness Training, 70s Women movement. And some of them are still really good foundational texts. Now some of it's going to feel really dated and just if you read those and they're cheap, you can get a lot of these at used bookstores for nothing, for pennies. Just let the dated stuff go and take the lessons where you can find them. Then again, as I mentioned, a resurgence in the 90s, so you might see some of these books available from mid ninety s. A lot of them are really focused on women at work, so they're career focused and they're about being ambitious. But there's some good lessons in there still. Now, what I like about recent products is that they're much more inclusive also, so it's not so stereotypical about men and women. And these are tools for everyone. And this is really good because a lot of people come to the assertiveness training workshops and sometimes they're making assumptions that are just for women. But there are men who feel like they're getting run over in meetings and they don't know how to advocate for themselves either. This really is for everybody. So you can Google assertiveness training. There are lots of free resources on the web. There are books, there are workbooks. I mean, I do have my book. It has some exercises in it. I've got a workbook only that's available on Etsy, but there's lots of name of your book? My book is Drowning and Timidity Women Politeness and the Power of Assertive Living. It is available at my website, karatuttlebell.com, but also for Kendall on Amazon. You can purchase it at Walmart or through professional women books. It lives in a couple of different places, so it's available. It does have exercises in it. Start with self reflection, right? You've got to know who you are and what's hard for you. So we know what to work on. So quick questions would be when you are walking across campus, are you the person who always moves out of the way on the sidewalk or do you hold your position on a plane? Do you ever get the armrest? Or do you never get the armrest in your family or, you know, romantic relationships? Do we ever eat where you want to eat or someone else always making the decision, are you watching the movies you want to watch, or are you just going along? And so there's all kinds of questions to just do some self reflection about where am I and where is it worth it? I'm not saying fight every battle. I don't know what I'm having for dinner tonight. And I may not care when I go home and make that decision with my partner. You know what I mean? It may be their night to pick, but the question is, are you ever getting what you want ever? And where is it important for you to do so? We can apply this to romantic and sexual relationships. Who's experiencing pleasure and how often and why not? And assertiveness matters there, too. Are we giving more than we're getting? And you just apply that give and take analysis that it was Sunday. Yes. Whatever relationship we're talking about. Right? Like, are you feeling taken advantage of or does it feel really balanced and equitable so that you start with the self reflection, then you start with the small practice. I want you to start small. I want it to feel doable. I want you to ask for something that's really low stakes, so it doesn't matter if you get the yes or not. And I also want you to get comfortable getting hearing no. You'll survive the no, it's all right. You survived the tough meeting. We survived the uncomfortable phone call. We've survived it over and over. We've survived it all thus far. Excellent. You will survive. And that's why that's nice. In my career, and I've also learned to perform extraversion, even though I have to retreat and recharge. If you learn you can do it, I'll learn I can do it. I'm going to have this burst of energy. I've also become really good about setting boundaries so I have that time to recharge. That also requires assertiveness. I got to tell my friends I cannot go out again. I'm, like, try to limit to two happy hours or two social events a week. Otherwise, I feel too depleted. And some of us can't say no to our friends who love us anyway. They love me anyway. They know I don't go to brunch. Okay? I don't go to brunch. Brunch is too loud, and I don't understand middle of the day drinking, and. [52:07] Dr. mOe Anderson: They'll tease you about it. We know you're not coming. [52:10] Cara Tuttle Bell: Yes, and it's fine then. It's all fine in other ways. Yes. They know I'll fight for them. They know I've got their back. So your relationships should be strong enough to survive that actually, they should be thriving. It's like they should really be seeing you for who you are and letting you be healthy in the ways that you need and so starting small with the practice just really helps you learn to ask if you have kids. I would say make them make phone calls, maybe put the name in at the restaurant. The students are coming in really struggling with just verbal communication, like out loud communication because they're doing it all on their phones. Okay? They want to text or do an online chat. And we're not preparing them for work. Work still requires some phone calls. I mean, at some point, you have to talk to another human. So you can start small in those ways to make them practice talking and to talk to adults and actually talking across the power differential in appropriate ways. But we got to break the scene and not hurt because seen and not heard is how we have a lot of child victimization. That's how we have the gymnasts, which we talked about going on, going on for so long. How do you have hundreds of victims for so long? Well, they did everything right, as you said. They told us and they told us, and they told us, and they told adults, and they told the FBI, you know, and how does this still continue? So I actually want us to raise angry girls. Write that down. Yes. Because the anger is a signal, as we talked about. If you're stressing politeness over their boundaries and well being, they're not going to acknowledge the harm themselves. They're not going to tell you about it. They're not going to seek support. They're going to be stuck in that self blame. And so let anger be the signal. Let assertiveness be the tool. And then the outcome is healthier beings, right, who once they've learned to advocate for themselves and assert themselves absolutely, I want them to have this sense of collective responsibility. And this is part of my message, which I really think was missing in the books of the in the 90s. You've got to advocate for others. That's what changes our communities. You've got to be a bystander who engages or be the witness who goes along and confirms somebody's report who at least acknowledges the harms that are happening everywhere we look and engage collectively. So it's not assertiveness just to get you a raise, which you deserve, okay, get your rates. But that's changing an individual person's existence. That's not creating change in our communities, structural or systemic change. That's not going to bring about gender equity. So we've got to use assertiveness to change our communities and engage collectively as well. And I think that's been missing in too many places, right? [55:32] Dr. mOe Anderson: And we've been so worried about the cost ourselves individually and not thinking about long term the consequences for generations to come, like the inequity with salaries and so many other things. When we think about what the CEOs of the Fortune 500, fortune 100 company, 4% women, all of this is related. It's all related, and it's time we changed it. And start by not being bystanders. Get out there and be advocates and leaders in this area. I love what you're doing. I could just go on and on. We need to do a live or something because I have enjoyed this and your passion around it is wonderful. I learned a lot. I didn't know what was going on on college campuses. I go back for football games and roll out. I couldn't use some of this. Trust and believe. So again, karate. Tuttle Bell, author of Drowning In That You Drowning in Women Politeness and the Power of Assertive living Tools and Tips to help anyone get it. Wherever books are sold, tell them how to connect with you online. That website one more time. Social media. However, we can find you online. [56:49] Cara Tuttle Bell: Sure. The easy way is to find me on my website, which is my name Caratuttlebell.com, and then you can find me on various forms of social media at Karatuttlebell. So I tried to make it easy. You reached out to me on LinkedIn, Instagram, doesn't matter. I'm publicly available. Feel free to reach out. I'm always happy to talk about this, as you can probably tell. [57:09] Dr. mOe Anderson: I can tell. I love it. And I can't wait to call my son and say, brave, angry girl. That's what we're going to be about. Thank you so much. You've been a wonderful guest. [57:21] Cara Tuttle Bell: Thank you so much for having me. [57:24] Dr. mOe Anderson: Wasn't that a great program? I love that episode. I enjoyed it. I hope you did too. Please remember to like, subscribe and share. Learn more about me on my website. Dr. Moanderson.com. That's Moe. You can read book excerpts, watch videos, learn about the services that I offer, and book me for a speaking engagement. I'd love to talk with your group and I'd love to work with you. So until the next time, review, renew, and re you. Thank you.

Miriam Mathews is a licensed social worker, Christian Life Coach, and author of 3 books. Her latest work is an anthology with Les Brown. She's also worked with renowned speaker and author Lisa Nichols. She chose to invest in her own wellness and career after experiencing sexual trauma years ago. She now helps others overcome people pleasing, sexual trauma, and perversion. In this episode, Dr. mOe and Miriam discuss religion vs relationship, how to "let that sofa go", recovering from 2020, personal growth, and generational wounds and how to define your DNA. Connect with Miriam and learn more at https://define-your-dna.com/ TRANSCRIPT AUTO-GENERATED BY ALITU Miriam Matthews: So people pleasing behavior, it comes from, again, that empathy that we have, that we are nurturers or we care. So it can come from a good place. But I say that empathy in the absence of healthy boundaries can often lead to enabling someone else but enabling someone else to explore you or use you. Or it can lead to self constant self sacrifice in a harmful way. (Music interlude) You can't say Dr. Mo ain't tell you they fear matters, the consequences of failure. What are you scared of? Why are you afraid? I'd rather live like I'm dying than live to die any day. My heart is pure. My soul is safe...(Music fades out) Dr. mOe: Hey, everybody. Welcome to Perpetual Motion, a podcast focused on wellness, personal growth, culture, and relationships. I'm your host, Dr. Mo Anderson. Best selling author, award winning podcast host, keynote speaker, and coach. I want to help you review, renew, and review. If you're new to the show or returning visitor, let's make this official. Please click that subscribe button to be notified of new episodes as soon as they are available. So my guest today is Miriam Matthews. She is a licensed therapist, coach, and author of three books. She has a new book, which is part of an anthology with none other than Les Brown. I can't wait to hear how that came about. Wow. Miriam. Welcome to perpetual motion. Miriam Matthews: Thank you so much, Doctor Mo. It's such an honor to be here. So thank you for allowing me to be here. Dr. mOe: Hey, I'm going hard in the paint with this first question. When you contacted us about being on the show, you said you help women ignite their power and purpose and heal by changing their mindset. That sounds awesome, but what does that mean? Miriam Matthews: So the first thing that sticks out to me is a scripture that I grew up learning and truly have lived by, and that is such as a man think of so they are and not man needing just gender, but women and men. And I have found that in my work with many clients, I would say probably, yeah. The most significant barrier to success is or are the limiting or negative beliefs that they have about themselves that can really put a lid on their capacity. I have this Facebook group, and I'll just share this part. A part of coming into the group is answering a few questions about what they're seeking to gain. And one of the themes that I have seen over and over again is, Miriam, I truly desire to live in my purpose. I want to hear from God more. I want to get past self doubt. And I believe that in order to do that, it does start in the mind many times. There are things that happen to us. I say if you're a human being, you've been through something. There are things that have happened to us that can create a framework of how we see ourselves and it can be a misrepresentation of who you actually are. And I say who you actually are. In Christ, God sees us one way, mankind can see us another. So I help facilitate confronting limiting beliefs, negative beliefs, so that we can truly untap the potential that is inside as well as the power and purpose that's already inside. Dr. mOe: Nice. That's excellent. Because people don't believe it because it's happening from childhood, from so many people just being barraged by negative things until you start to believe them yourself. Because kids come here very optimistic. I remember my boys being young, they thought they were the strongest, fastest, smartest, bravest. And over time, when you see the world starts to work folks down. So I'm pleased to hear what you're doing and how you're helping women ignite their power and purpose. So you're a licensed social worker with BA and Master's degrees in social work. Did you always want to do what you're doing now? Miriam Matthews: I would say that it's been a journey to really step into where I am right now. I haven't always been here. So like, when I started in the field of social work, it came from a passion of just wanting it. I wanted to help people. I wanted to help people as a child. And I think that's something that we're all given is some degree of empathy or caring for others as a result of certain things that I've been through in my childhood and teenage years, young adult years. And I'm still young and still learning, and I will always be learning. But it led me to want to help others. And I've done a different or been in a variety of different fields of social work, worked with the elderly community. I've worked at DEFAC with children who have gone through child neglect or abuse. Dr. mOe: I don't know what DPAC is. Miriam Matthews: That what? Oh, deepak is the division of Family and Children Services. I worked in Child Protective Services for a couple of years, so I know. Dr. mOe: It is CPS, so I didn't know that acronym. I just wanted to make sure we were all on the same page. Got it. Yes. Miriam Matthews: And eventually came over into starting a private practice, actually, during the pandemic. Yes. And this is also during a time where the need for mental health increased astronomically. Right. Dr. mOe: I was going to say that was one of the few industries where it was a really good time to go into business. Miriam Matthews: Absolutely. So I said, okay, well, why not make the impact that I truly want to make? And I think being in private practice and working with clients one on one, I was better able to do that. It's just a really intimate, just personable, professional relationship that you build with each person. So in starting the private practice, maybe I would say a year into that, god led me towards coaching. So stepping into the field of coaching because I wanted to make an even a bigger impact. So now I'm into group coaching alongside private practice. Okay. Dr. mOe: I had a guest on recently who made an interesting distinction between coaching and counseling. But I'd like to hear, since you literally went from one to the other, this person was fully a coach, but since you literally segue to one and do both, what is the difference for those who don't know, between coaching and counseling? Miriam Matthews: So, for counseling, I would say the primary distinction is meeting a diagnosis, needing to meet the display of certain symptoms that meet a diagnosis that essentially your insurance will cover. But there are individuals who don't necessarily meet that criteria or are wanting to focus more on the future versus what happened to them in their past. And I would say that is the distinction with coaching. It's not necessarily being held back by some sort of trauma that may have happened. And I will say that my niche or my specialty is anxiety, depression, posttraumatic stress disorder, some sort of trauma that may have happened that then creates anxiety or depression with PTSD. But on the, coaching and diagnosis is not necessary. And though healing may be needed or forgiveness may be needed, or certain weights may need to be dropped, or limiting beliefs still need to be challenged, it doesn't involve a diagnosis. Dr. mOe: Got you. Excellent. Thank you. And that very much correlates with what the previous guest said, which I anticipated that it would. I know you teach the importance of investing in yourself, Miriam, meaning your professional growth, and I would imagine personal as well. What is an example of how you've invested in yourself? Miriam Matthews: Thank you for asking that question. And one of the most significant examples that come to mind is when I invested into a coaching program with none other than Lisa Nichols and how I. Dr. mOe: Came are you from with the heavy headers, Lisa Brown. Get into your context. My goodness, that is impressive. Miriam Matthews: As Lisa would say, are you ready to play full out? And my answer was yes. And prior to being ready to play full out, I was tired of hiding. I was tired of my own limiting beliefs, even being in the field. This is actually prior to my private practice, but still being in the field of social work, I still had and carried so much pain and so many weights from the past. So I was essentially still, as they would say, a shell of myself. And I really wanted to experience my purpose and potential. I wanted that to be unclogged, but I had so much that was still clogged on the inside, meanwhile trying to help others. So I said, okay, it's really time for me to help myself. How can I do that? And what I came to understand is many times we acquiesce or just acclimate to our environment, and sometimes there can be a degree of complacency that comes with that or mediocrity that comes with that. So I wanted to rise up the numbness, yes. Coming desensitized to it. And it's interesting how we can kind of do the same thing or stay in the same place just because it's familiar, even though it doesn't help you grow or even though it's not beneficial to us. And that was me. I was the epitome of that. And I came to understand that I really needed to invest in support and accountability and came across Lisa Nichols. She had this conference in the beginning of one particular year, and I said, oh, my goodness, this is something that I really need. And joining that program, I was able to just take a look at myself in different ways. In different ways. That program was certainly like a stepping stone. But then I also wanted to make sure I was investing in my relationship with God because that was also something that was missing at the time. Like I had been used to religion, but religion didn't work for me because it really didn't put an emphasis on my relationship with God on one relationship. Right. That's what I needed. So I ended up investing into another program that focused on building that intimate relationship with God. Those two combined just created some transformation. Right? Dr. mOe: There's a lot to unpack there because one, thank you for your transparency. I love it when people are willing to share their own process. But just right there that there's no single cure, there's no silver bullet. There's so many areas where we need development academic, physical, mental, spiritual, professional. And sometimes people want to get all of that from one person. But that's why it takes a village. It takes a village not just to raise a child, but to coach an adult. It takes a lot of people pouring into you, and you're a nurturer like myself. You're in a healing, helping profession, and people are just constantly draining from you because that's your job. That's what you do. But if a lot of people are draining from you, there's no way one person is going to be able to pour back in. And I'm not talking about God's role in our lives, but there are people around us who are anointed and appointed to help us, to hold us up, to assist us, to push us forward. And so we got to be on the lookout for who those angels are because they're everywhere. So I really like that story. And the other thing is, I thought about it when you were saying it, but I want to circle back. You mentioned 2020 and dealing with your own struggles as you're trying to counsel other people. So I'm wondering, did hearing their stories and helping them with their pain, whether it was related to Colbert or previous trauma or whatever, did that make you feel even worse or did it help you? I realized helping all of that, I don't want anybody's personal information, but just being inundated with all of these people during the biggest global crisis in our lifetime. How did that impact you personally? Miriam Matthews: That's a great question. So I would say in working with people, hearing their stories, it challenged me in a different way. I guess it helped me in two different ways. One of the most common beliefs that I have seen through clients that I've worked with and one that I've experienced myself is a belief about not being good enough. So even that belief was present in trying to help others. There was a belief of, I don't know if I'm the one that should be able to be a helper or to help bring people along or to challenge their own beliefs, especially where I'm experiencing a belief about not being good enough. And that was a key sign that I needed to get the help that I needed. You could be a therapist, but get you a therapist as well. Dr. mOe: Get your human. Miriam Matthews: Exactly. You're human. And so that was a driving force behind, okay, let's deal with your own limited experience. Invest in that. So that definitely took me there. Also. It helped me to feel less alone and to understand human behavior even more. Dr. mOe: That's what I was thinking because I was up in this house by myself doing a smaller podcast just to keep from I was like, I'm just going to talk to the universe. I hope somebody is hearing this. Maybe I'm still alive and connected. We haven't had the rapture and I don't even know it because I'm serious. The house wasn't left, but that was four or five months. That was like, yes, I know what you mean. Miriam Matthews: I know what you mean. Yeah, we kept on hitting up DoorDash just about every other night. It was terrible. Dr. mOe: So you knew that you were not alone, that other people were feeling and experiencing the same things, and you were able to help them even within trying to deal with what was going on in your household. That takes a lot of strength, and that's a gift. Not everyone can do that. Some people crumble under that kind of pressure. So, Miriam, there are so many ways to express authenticity. I'm moving from your credentials and then your investment in yourself to talking about authenticity. What we both prioritize is also the first chapter in one of your books, and we're going to talk about your books later. But this topic is stop people pleasing behavior. Please define what that means and provide some tips on how to change, if this is an issue for you, how to recognize it and how to change. Miriam Matthews: So I'll say this again, when it came to people pleasing, I could pretty much set the example, which would have been a bad example. I was the epitome of that. My goodness, thank God for the living and just change behavior. Did you say boundaries are balanced? Dr. mOe: Boundaries, yeah. Miriam Matthews: Boundaries is the word that it's just music to my ears. It really is. So people pleasing behavior, it comes from, again, that empathy that we have, that we are nurturers or we care and just want to help others, we want to be loved as well. We want folks to care about us. So it can come from a good place. But I say that empathy in the absence of healthy boundaries can often lead to enabling someone else this is going a different route, but enabling someone else to exploit you or use you or it can lead to constant self sacrifice in a harmful way or self neglect. So that's really the way or the direction that I want to go in explaining what people pleasing is. So it's outsourcing your need for validation to people because there is or can be this emptiness that is on the inside. So it can often end up being again harmful. So constantly looking for someone's approval or validation, which again can happen due to not knowing who you truly are or what your worth is, right? Yeah. Okay. Dr. mOe: And tips to begin to change that type of behavior that can get very ingrained. Miriam Matthews: Yes. So, tips to begin to change. I think one of the first things is awareness. So having some awareness about is this me? And what are some signs that I'm people pleasing. Because again, it can seem nice in the beginning, but one of the key signs that it's a problem is feeling burnt out, it's feeling depleted, it's feeling that you cannot use your no, that you have to constantly say yes to people or you've overused your guess. I would say those are some red flags right there that people pleasing could be an issue or that your needs are not actually being addressed by you or met. Another symptom could be the absence of healthy boundaries. So awareness is the first key or the first recommendation is to self reflect and to see, okay, are the red flags that were just named something that I'm actually dealing with? After awareness, I would say take a look at what you want to change. Are there specific people? I guess the pattern of pleasing may be heightened more than others. I think that's also part of awareness but maybe getting a little bit more specific. Dr. mOe: Another record, please. I want to make sure people recognize this because some of the confusion though is because I've been accused of this and I'll say when I was younger I had an issue with it. I almost think I probably learned it in school because you don't get out without a lot of pleasing professors and teachers and labmates and everybody else. And maybe that's being collaborative, but at some point you just learn to dodge the friction. But for other people sometimes it's just my nature to just be kind, to be concerned about people. It can be a perfect stranger or whatever. I try to be respectful to parents and elderly and whatever, and I'm using myself as an example. So I've been told you're always trying to please everybody, always trying to make everybody like you or you did that. I remember my cousins that you went to dental school to make your parents happy. Nobody goes through four years school lives to make anybody happy. Those people dropped out the first year. But I said that to say it was almost like people wanted me to change who I naturally was. I wasn't doing anything I didn't want to do. And I certainly wasn't tiptoeing around people at this point, which, when I was younger, I would do just to keep from upsetting them. So I had those boundaries. But that distinction some people don't get between you're a nice, kind person and the people pleasing. I guess I'm still not clear on, as you're explaining it, where that line is drawn. Miriam Matthews: I would say it's literally the absence of healthy boundaries and also not knowing yourself, not knowing who you truly are, would be key distinctions between where it's healthy and it's working for you or it's not. Okay when I say it's healthy or it's working for you. Not people pleasing, but kindness, like being kind, taking care of others in a way that energizes you, but it's not depleting you. You still know who you are. You're still your authentic self. You're not changing yourself or morphing yourself into a way that somebody else would like you to be, whether it's a family member, a friend, a supervisor, you're yourself all the way around that's one. You know, that's a huge distinction from people pleasing behavior, which could be the best version of yourself is what I like to say. Not versions of yourself. Dr. mOe: Not versions. Okay. Yes. Miriam Matthews: Just in continuing some recommendations, I actually want to share a quick story. One thing that can lead again to people pleasing behavior I mentioned earlier is as children, we're also learning about ourselves by the reactions of the people around us or society. So as we're growing up with individuals who are imperfect. Who are not perfect. Who are sometimes dealing with their own traumas and may project that we can also learn things about ourselves that are not conducive for healthy self esteem or growth or feeling good about who you truly are. That's not everybody's case. But it's the case of a large majority of the clients that I've worked with. So the framework or seeing themselves in a positive light is disrupted at an early age or maybe in their teenage years or whatever the case. I don't want to go off too much in a ramp, but sometimes it's even like we're social learning creatures. So, say if I have two parents that are often arguing or I see how my father treats my mother or how my mother treats my father, I may learn different behaviors that lead me to avoid certain scenarios or situations or may place a burden on me to act a certain way because I don't want to be the recipient of somebody's irritation. So I'm speaking in sort of vague terms, but. Dr. mOe: Those are good examples. I just wanted something concrete for people because even the words were using, like, boundaries. You and I use them a lot in conversation. I do wellness coaching and some other things, but I don't ever want to assume that people even know what that means. It's a good word, but if you don't know it, if you don't have that knowledge not everybody is engaging in these conversations. This may be the first time they're hearing these and people pleasing. So I just want to make it clear I don't want it back. What it does and doesn't mean that it's an extreme of behavior. It's not just that you like to be kind to people. You have the spiritual gift of hospitality, but that, as you said, you're morphing, you're transforming, and you're behaving in a way that's not even natural for you to make other people happy. If I got it right. Is that right? Miriam Matthews: That's right. Dr. mOe: Not my specialty, this area. So I am learning more and more too, and I enjoy being on a continuous path of growth. So really glad you're here. Miriam Matthews: Thank you. Dr. mOe: Another fun chapter heading in one of your books is Let That Sofa Go. Do share what you mean by that. Miriam Matthews: Oh, yes. Let that Sofa Go. I learned about this concept from none other than Lisa Nichols. And Letting That Sofa Go was really taking a look at how I was bringing along the pain that I had experienced as a result of different traumas in my life. And even though I was getting older and I was aging gracefully, I would say my emotional maturity was still that. Or did it correlate it with different ages where I experienced just something traumatic or just had a negative experience that led to me having a negative belief about myself. So even I'll use, for example, prior to me and my husband getting married, the dating phase of that was very difficult because of just pain that I had experienced that I hadn't let go of yet. And it created a lot of conflict. I didn't know how to communicate in a healthy way. And I say that pain that is not transformed is transmitted, and hurt people will also hurt people. Dr. mOe: Yes. It's one of my favorite things. Hurt people? Hurt people, yes. Miriam Matthews: So I realized that in order for me to see myself in a healthier life, because how you show up on the inside is how you show up in other places as well. So whether that's a relationship or your career or just anywhere else, it starts with healing on the inside. My heart was bleeding. I really needed God to do something in me, and I needed to be an active participant in that. So Let That Sofa Go is realizing that your future can be bright. I don't want to just say can be bright. But I think it is actually bright. Yes, the present is bright. Yes, it is bright. It's realizing that the future doesn't want that sofa that's not meant to fit in the doorway being a little funny, I said sometimes we could be so determined and we will take the door off and try to make it fit. And then it starts to take up space in new rooms that you're entering in, but it sticks out like a sore thumb. That sofa may have some barbed wires sticking out of it, the cotton is coming out, holes in it has all kinds of stuff and it's meant to be released. And that really takes forgiveness. In the programs that I had invested in, I learned how to forgive on an emotional level. I like to think that I didn't understand the difference. I learned about forgiveness growing up at church and how important that is. Forgive so you can be forgiven. And I think I did that on a conscious level with my words. And certainly your words have power, but I still carried a lot on the inside and I learned how to do that on an emotional level. And that really allowed me to heal and have more peace instead of pain. Dr. mOe: Absolutely. Those are some good analogies. My thing I always say is healed things don't hurt. And if you had an injured area and you touch it from health care or personal experience, if you touch it and you still feel pain, it's not healed yet, even though the skin can look great. And when we're triggered by people and places and incidents that something happened long ago and we see that person across the room and there we go, spiraling off the deep end, that's a healed thing. That's a hurt thing that's not healed. And we've all done it. We have all done it. I'll share my story from my dating chronicles. I remember I'll never forget this. It just really impacted me. It hurt to hear it, but it was a helpful hurt. This guy overreacted to something he did and he said, you know what? I really feel like I'm being punished for something another guy did. And for me to be I was just quiet, which is fairly unusual, but it just hit me like a ties and blow because immediately I didn't even have to think about it. I knew he was right. He was completely right. And I had to go on that journey of, okay, let me go dig up all this stuff in these shallow graves and make sure that I'm done with it and that I dispose of things properly. When I was older, I was in my 40s too. So you just never get down with yourself, folks. That's what we're saying. Working on yourself. There is room for improvement. But every time you reach another level, it is such a great feeling to look back. I'm having fun with this. Let that sofa go for that shirt from high school. Let all of that go. Miriam Matthews: Let it go. All of it. Dr. mOe: So let's get a little deeper here. You are open in your books and your teachings and coaching that you've experienced sexual trauma and that you've gone through the healing process. What would you say to someone who has experienced sexual trauma? Miriam Matthews: Okay, so what I would say is, first off, I'm sorry that this has happened to you. And no matter what happened to you, you are not that thing. And the reason why I say that is, for such a long time, I carried shame. And I will even say that this happened when I was six, seven years old, and it was by two individuals that were extremely close. I would just say, I'm sorry. Oh, thank you for saying that. And even on the spiritual side, I'll even say that's when a spirit of perversion entered in what perversion is literally it's just the wrong version. Dr. mOe: The wrong version? Miriam Matthews: The wrong version. Dr. mOe: Version is the wrong version. Miriam Matthews: Never heard that. Version is the wrong version. So when it comes to boundaries, I learned that maybe boundaries are not as important or not all that important. I learned that. And these are things that I had to unlearn. Let me just say that. But I also began to see myself as disgusting because of what happened to me. So now it tainted how I saw myself. It tainted my interaction with male figures, with adult male figures, even as I grew up. It just led me to see myself as the wrong version of myself, if that makes sense. So what I would say is, you're not what happened to you. As a matter of fact, you are resilient. You are here to this day. You are actually the resilient that has rose above it and can rise above it. And many times we often need help and support, I would say, to get help, seek out therapy. If it's something that, again, that you're continuing to carry, and it feels like shame or condemnation, that is not the end of your chapter. Life can be so much more fulfilling. And then it may seem, and the truth is, again, you're not what happened to, I can't drive that home enough, because that was something that I battled with for the majority of my life. I just want people to know that. Dr. mOe: Your self identity and that's so important, your self identity, your self confidence. Miriam, as you were talking, what came to me, and I hadn't had this thought before, was that sometimes we have multiple anchors. We're wondering, we're thinking, okay, I took care of that thing. I pulled it up, I dealt with it. Why am I still stuck in this place? And it's possible that you have multiple anchors holding you back, which is why you can't rise up and sell on. So you really need to assess everything around you. For that possibility. Maybe it wasn't just that one maybe it's not just that one thing in your past or in your present. I really like that analogy you gave and thank you for sharing your experience as well. That was difficult, I know, and hard to move through. But you're an example to others that it can be done and now you literally help other women who had the same experience. Miriam Matthews: You know what, Dr. Moe? Thank you for also saying that, because it just sparked something else that I need to say, which is I wouldn't say I became mad at God, but I was very disturbed by how could this happen to me and why me? But it literally took again relationship with God and going back to God to understand why these things happen. And in doing so, I began to understand that with God's unconditional love and with perfect love, it allows for free will. God love doesn't control right. That being said, mankind, I will say, can pervert free will and bad things happen. Nevertheless, it took going back to God to understand, to abide in his love so that I could heal and to begin to see myself in the way that I was truly supposed to see myself. That was a huge shift away from what happened to me, away from other people's opinions of me or people's judgments of me or even my own self imposed judgments. I was able to release that, just understanding that it's God's love that is perfect. It's God's love that truly will bind up all wounds. And as a matter of fact, he guarantees we're going to experience tribulation and trouble in this world anyhow because there is a real enemy that is after our purpose and wants to create disconnection between us and God. And that was a way for the enemy to do that. Unfortunately, however, as a result of healing, I've been able to move past the pain and actually stand on a platform on which I'm igniting my purpose. And there are women who have experienced, men who have experienced what I've been through and I can relate to that and I can help and say, hey, I am an example that you can heal. Dr. mOe: I know what you're going through, I know what you feel and you can heal. Before we go, you've written three books and you have the new release coming as part of the anthology that I mentioned in your intro briefly. Tell us about your books and how listeners can purchase them. Miriam Matthews: Absolutely. So the first book I wrote is called My Body Isn't Mine how to Heal Sexual Trauma and Find Peace. And it essentially sounds like what the title is or what it's about. So I felt in the beginning that my body wasn't mine, that it could just be treated any kind of way. And it really took going back to God or going to God and having that relationship with Him to realize, wait, my body is actually the temple of the Holy Spirit. I was bought the price. God loved me before. I didn't have to do anything to even earn his love. So it allowed for restoration and a peace that came that pushed out all perversion or the wrong version of me seeing myself. Because now God is all truth, even in scriptures, his Holy Spirit is described as the spirit of truth. Right. So the more I abide it in God, I abide it in truth. And now it's all about healing and becoming that living sacrifice so that God can use me in amazing, mighty ways. Dr. mOe: Wow. Miriam Matthews: So I hope that makes sense. Thank you. Good. The second book is actually another book with Les Brown. It's called unleash your undeniable impact. And that was with Les Brown and Dr. Cheryl woods. It just sends a message, has like maybe 50 to 60 chapters in there from authors who are sharing their stories and wanting to inspire people to be their best selves as well. It's motivational. It's amazing to meet you right where you are. If you just need a dose of inspiration for the day to just keep going. We all need encouragement. That is what that book is about. Dr. mOe: Absolutely. Miriam Matthews: And then the third one is my most recent one and it's called the Courage to Answer God's Call on Your Life. That one is the one that we've been dabbling in today, which is learning how to shift away from people pleasing behavior, becoming your most authentic self in Christ. Throughout this interview, I've been expressing that that's where I am. I'm really all about my relationship with God. I believe many people can experience success, but I wanted to experience success and peace. I wanted to be at the sacrifice. Dr. mOe: Hey, you're doing a great position. Miriam Matthews: Yes, ma'am. I'm called to do it, so I said all right. And it takes courage. It takes courage. So it's about not letting fear stop you, not letting the fear of rejection or people's opinions or criticisms stop you and you're not stopping yourself getting out of the way, letting God have this way in your life when he gets your yes, amazing things happen and I think that is key to igniting power. Dr. mOe: Absolutely. If God gives you vision, he's going to give you pro vision. So act on it. Act on it. Be sure and clear where it came from and what you to do and make it happen. Well, this is speaking of motivating and inspiring us exactly what this interview has been. Mary Matthews, I so appreciate you bringing your expertise. Perpetual motion with Dr. Mo Anderson. Lastly, please tell folks how they can find you online. I know the last book you mentioned is on Amazon with some great reviews, but tell people how they can connect with you online and learn more and purchase your books. Miriam Matthews: Absolutely. So here's my website. It is defined one more time. Define-your-dna com. Or you can also go online and just type in the browser. Bonus definition bonus. Definerreddna.com and just really short. What is this whole DNA thing about? When things happen to me in my childhood, in some way, it was an attack on my destiny and who I was. I didn't have the words to frame it, but I felt it was like an attack on me, my DNA. However, it's our responsibility to be an active participant in our healing. So that's what the defined part is about. But DNA means dive into God, n is neutralize negative beliefs, and A is activate power and purpose. So that is how you define your DNA. Dr. mOe: Oh, my. Let the church say amen. Miriam Matthews: Amen. Dr. mOe: Thank you. Wasn't that a great program? I love that episode. I enjoyed it. I hope you did, too. Please remember to, like, subscribe and share. Learn more about me on my website, dr. Moanderson.com. That's Moe. You can read book excerpts, watch videos, learn about my services that I offer, and book me for a speaking engagement. I'd love to talk with your group, and I'd love to work with you. So until the next time, review, renew, and read you. Miriam Matthews: Thank you. Bye.    

On this episode I chatted with 2018 Oklahoma Hall of Fame Inductee Mo Anderson. The youngest of five, born to tenant farmers in rural Oklahoma, Mo Anderson was the first in her family to earn a college degree. She taught music in the public schools before entering the world of real estate. Her first Century 21 franchise quickly rose to the third-highest producing out of 7,500 locations in North America. She served on the Oklahoma Real Estate Commission, including 2 terms as chairman. She convinced Keller Williams Realty Co-founder, Gary Keller, to expand his franchise company outside of Texas. Anderson became the regional owner for Keller Williams Realty Oklahoma. In 1995, Mo became the first CEO and co-owner of Keller Williams Realty International. The Company is now the number one Real Estate Franchise company in the world in size, units, and volume. She currently serves as Vice Chairman of the Board. Deemed one of America's top 25 Influential Thought Leaders by REALTOR magazine and One of Real Estates Most Influential People, Anderson continues to cultivate the firm's culture, inspiring 189,000 agents in 32 countries to maintain high standards of character. She is the author of A Joy-filled Life: “Lessons from a Tenant Farmer's Daughter Who Became a CEO”, and launched MoAnderson.com, an online mentoring community. Anderson's greatest legacy will be her philanthropic giving. Her local community, charitable organizations, and ministries around the world have been richly blessed by her belief that the higher purpose of business is to give, care, and share. This episode is presented by the Oklahoma Hall of Fame, telling Oklahoma's story through its people since 1927. For more information on the Oklahoma Hall of Fame go to www.oklahomahof.com and follow them on instagram for daily updates www.instagram.com/oklahomahof  #thisisoklahoma 

In this episode, we feature Mo Anderson who is a legacy in our industry! Mo shares some of her perspective of turning 85 and the impact ahead! So many life lessons on the mindset around money and the importance of giving back. From a tenant farmer's daughter growing up poor in Oklahoma, to being inducted into the Oklahoma Hall of Fame for her CEO contributions as the first female CEO of a national real estate company, Mo is an inspiration to all of us. I hope you treasure this episode as much as I do... please enjoy the listen and share with someone who needs to hear this today!

On this episode, Linda and Pres talk to Sherry Lewis about the ways that she has seen profit share change lives, including her own.  Sherry shares how she didn't totally understand Profit Share when she first heard about it, but when she got it, she got it, and latched onto it.  She shares how Charles Boles changed a family's life with his profit share.  She also tells Linda and Pres what it was like meeting Mo Anderson and how her relationship with her progressed throughout her time at Keller Williams. 

Wes sits down with Mo Anderson to talk about how her unique journey and the path to living and leading your best life. Nicknamed the “Velvet Hammer” for her soft and distinctly effective leadership style, Mo Anderson's personal integrity, faith and unending drive positioned Keller Williams to become one of the most successful franchises in real estate history. Mo served as Keller Williams CEO for more than 10 years and currently serves as vice chairman of the board. A sought-after speaker and gifted writer, Mo's recently published book, A Joy-Filled Life: Lessons from a Tenant Farmer's Daughter…Who Became a CEO, chronicles a truly American success story while encouraging readers to follow their own dreams, set high standards and at all times, “do the right thing.”

“When God puts a dream in your DNA, it comes true in spite of your circumstances.” At 83 years and with an amazing life story, Mo Anderson, former CEO and current Vice Chairman of Keller Williams Realty, shares a lifetime of leadership truths. In her conversation with Thomas Hill, Mo discusses tenacity, standards, culture, and being an agent of change. When asked about her personal and legendary generosity, Mo says, “I wanted to make more money than I needed so I could give it away.”

Our new “Right Road Conversation” episodes of the “On the Right Road!” radio show will be sprinkled in whenever possible each season and are based on the age-old question: “If you had the chance to sit down and talk with ANYONE from throughout history for an hour, who would it be?” And this is the very first one, featuring Paula’s internationally beloved guest, Mo Anderson. Just like our traditional episodes, our “Conversation” shows will be filled with the same wonderful Right Road inspiration, support, and giving – just with more of the hour spent on in-depth discussion with remarkable people making a remarkable difference in the world. Join Paula and Mo for this very special hour, guaranteed to uplift and inspire every generation!

Mo Anderson is the Vice-Chair of the Board and Co-Owner of Keller Williams Realty International, as well as the former CEO. Mo is also the author of A Joy-Filled Life. Growing up on a tenant farm, Mo thought she wanted to be a music teacher. She then decided to get into real estate, and like many agents, she struggled. In fact, she nearly failed out of the business. The story about how she survived and broke through the ceiling is one of destiny and one I know you'll enjoy. The experience in her early days of real estate taught Mo the greatest business lesson in life she ever learned, “DO THE RIGHT THING.” When you do the right thing, you can change the course of someone's life. After opening her own brokerage firm and becoming highly successful, she came across Gary Keller and Keller Williams Realty International. Mo became the CEO of Keller Williams and lead it from a small regional real estate company to its journey to becoming the #1 company in the world.   The definition of true success is when you are at peace with yourself, the world, and your God in the middle of the storm. Trust will get you through the storm. Leadership is a place where people want to follow you. Leaders have followers. Respect for the leader is about consistency. To be a great leader, you have to dive deep into your faith. Your faith gives you the foundation for your values. Values are what help you establish your standards. She applies standards because she cares about people. In every opportunity, we have a responsibility. Next, we talked about culture. Culture is the predetermined way we treat each other. Win-win or no deal will never go away. It is foundational and eternal truth. When you have something built on eternal truths, it becomes your bedrock. The culture cannot just be about one person. It must be instilled first in the leaders and then the leaders instill it in their people. Mo's Book Recommendations https://amzn.to/34bFHH4 (A Joy-Filled Life by Mo Anderson) https://amzn.to/2EMjczI (The Dream Giver by Bruce Wilkinson) Connect with Mo https://www.facebook.com/moanderson (Facebook) https://www.linkedin.com/in/momentorship/ (LinkedIn) http://www.moanderson.com/new/ (Website) https://twitter.com/momentorship (Twitter) https://www.instagram.com/mo_mentorship/ (Instagram)

Mo Anderson, Vice-Chair of the board for Keller Williams, discusses her positive mindset approach to life that has continually helped her recognize opportunities throughout her life. Nicknamed the “Velvet Hammer” for her soft and distinctly effective leadership style, Mo Anderson’s integrity, faith, and unending drive positioned Keller Williams to become one of the most successful franchises in real estate history.

I had the privilege of speaking to the legendary Mo Anderson of Keller Williams. She goes through the 4 truths of mindset and how to handle tough times. this is a must listen to episode.

In this episode, Linda McKissack and Dana Gentry share their favorite highlights from Mega Camp in Austin, Texas. Mega Camp is where top-producing professionals go to focus, embrace opportunity and connect with the industry’s most esteemed leaders. This year, Gary Keller and 15,000 top agents from around the world, gathered to network, learn, and prepare for the future of real estate. The week ended with an inspirational session, led by Mo Anderson with special guest, Jim Stovall. Get the Show Notes Here Got a Question? Share your situation, opportunity or challenge with us and we may choose your question as a topic for our podcast! Click Here to submit your questions. Be a guest on "Everything Life and Real Estate." We love to coach Top Producers. Tough Situations. Fierce Conversations. Click Here to volunteer to be a guest on our show! Get your Freedom Number Scorecard. Text “FreedomNumber” to 33444 One-on-One Consultations for Top Producers. If you'd like to work directly with me on a situation or problem... just send us a message and put "One-on-One" in the subject line.  LET’S CONNECT! Facebook www.facebook.com/everythinglifeandrealestate Instagram https://www.instagram.com/everythinglifeandrealestate/ Linda McKissack  https://www.facebook.com/lindamckissack https://www.instagram.com/mckissacklinda/ Dana Gentry https://www.facebook.com/danagentryrealtor https://www.instagram.com/danaggentry/

Known at times as the "Velvet Hammer" for her uncompromising approach, Mo Anderson's business skills and leadership are uniquely matched by her faith and compassion. She is the heart of Keller Williams, and her personal integrity and unending drive are touchstones that have made KW one of the most successful franchises in real estate history. In this episode, Linda McKissack and Dana Gentry talk with Mo about holding high standards, culture and being the CEO of Keller Williams Realty.   Want to learn more? View our episode show notes here! Connect with Mo at MoAnderson.com  Download the PDF  What is Culture? Read A Joy Filled Life by Mo Anderson Read Dream Giver by Bruce Wilkinson We welcome your questions! Email your inquiries to info@lindamckissack.com. We will choose a few questions from our listeners each week, so be sure to subscribe to Everything Life and Real Estate.

As a business owner, how much time are you spending doing administrative tasks? Most business owners fail to realize that they spend over half of their time on administrative tasks, when they would benefit more by hiring an assistant and focusing on the most dollar productive activities. In this episode Linda McKissack and Dana Gentry discuss the second level of building a real estate business. Linda also talks about her visit with Mo Anderson, real estate legend and author of A Joy Filled Life.  Executive Assistant Job Description Example We welcome questions about the seven levels of real estate. Sign up here or email your inquiries to info@lindamckissack.com. We will choose a few questions from our listeners each week, so be sure to subscribe to Everything Life and Real Estate.

Mo Anderson - Secrets of a Joy-Filled Life Revealed: 5 Minute Success - The Podcast, Episode 72     Celebrating her 81st birthday in 2018, Mo Anderson is the heart and truly beloved leader of Keller Williams Realty. Strong, principled, and compassionate, Mo’s personal integrity and unending drive are touchstones that have made Keller Williams Realty one of the most successful franchises in real estate history.    Mo joined Keller Williams Realty as president and chief executive officer in 1995, and shepherded the company from 35 market centers to more than 530 within 10 years. Known at times as the “Velvet Hammer” for her uncompromising values and standards, Mo’s astute business acumen and leadership abilities are uniquely matched by her faith and compassion. She has continuously cultivated the firm’s value system, inspiring over 180,000 associates across the globe to maintain high standards of character within both their personal and professional lives. In 2006, she assumed her current role as vice chairman of the board.    Most exciting is Mo’s current endeavor as author of A Joy-filled Life: Lessons of a Tenant Farmer’s Daughter who became a CEO. She has spent the past 2 years touring North America speaking about her book in a presentation called 7 Pillars of a Joy-filled Life, which encapsulates the lessons Mo has learned over her lifetime and neatly organizes them into seven fundamental pillars of belief that can help every participant to create his or her own joy-filled life.    Recently, she launched www.MoAnderson.com, an on-line community that has allowed her to fulfill the dream of mentoring others, near and far. Here, Mo shares life changing leadership principles that contribute a joy-filled life. In every way, she is committed to leaving a legacy: the higher purpose of business is to give, care, and share.    With tenacious determination, she is committed to reinventing herself as a contributor to others and the world during each new decade of life. At 81 years young, Mo Anderson continues as the beloved, shining star of Keller Williams Realty, leading and nurturing the company’s culture for a new era.       In this episode, Karen and Mo Anderson discuss: Success Story of Mo Anderson Commit to Get Leads Lead generating Consult to Sell Nurture your clients through processes Connect to Build and Grow Do what it takes to succeed Success Thinking, Activities and Vision Refuse to quiet Sweet Spot of Success     "You just have to keep on keeping on."- Mo Anderson     *5 Minute Success - Listener Giveaway* Go to www.MoAnderson.com  to receive your FREE invitation to join on-line community at no charge and a free down load of the study guide that accompanies Mo's book, A Joy-Filled Life!     Connect with Mo Anderson:   Twitter:  @MoMentorship Facebook:  @MoAndersonPage/ Website: MoAnderson.com Email:  Kellie.Clark@KW.com Book: A Joy-Filled Life Show: Mornings With Mo YouTube: Mornings with Mo LinkedIn: MoMentorship     About the Podcast   Join host Karen Briscoe each week to learn how you can achieve success at a higher level by investing just 5 minutes a day! Tune in to hear powerful, inspirational success stories and expert insights from entrepreneurs, business owners, industry leaders, and real estate agents that will transform your business and life. Karen shares a-hamoments that have shaped her career and discusses key concepts from her book Real Estate Success in 5 Minutes a Day: Secrets of a Top Agent Revealed.   Here’s to your success in business and in life!     Connect with Karen Briscoe:   Twitter: @5MinuteSuccess Facebook: 5MinuteSuccess Website: 5MinuteSuccess.com Email: Karen@5MinuteSuccess.com   5 Minute Success Links   Learn more about Karen’s book, Real Estate Success in 5 Minutes a Day   Subscribe to 5 Minute Success Podcast   Spread the love and share the secrets of 5 Minute Success with your friends and colleagues!   Audio production by Turnkey Podcast Productions. You’re the expert. Your podcast will prove it.

Mo Anderson shares how graduating college made a huge step in her confidence, how she finds role models, and what responsibilities she feels mentors have in shaping the confidence of young minds. Email Mo including to encourage her to get her singing on YouTube! Comment on this episode at boldadulting.com/blog/2017/3/20/podcast-singer-research-associate-wife-mo-anderson-ba-13 Find BoldAdulting: @BoldAdultingBoldAdulting.com Interested in a free confidence-coaching consultation? Get in touch with Masha!

In 1996, after 15 years as a leader in the real estate industry (with Century 21 and Prudential), Dave joined Keller Williams and teamed up with Gary Keller and Mo Anderson . Over the next 12 years the company grew from 2,000 agents to over 72,000. Now that Dave has been away from KWRI for […] The post The Truth about Keller Williams Realty – WarriorTalk with Dave Jenks appeared first on Free Enterprise Warriors.