Insomnia Coach® Podcast

Rebecca never struggled with sleep — until 24-hour shifts as a hospital-based midwife changed everything. To protect her patients, she stayed awake through every shift. Eventually, she couldn't sleep even when she tried. She turned to medication, tracked every detail, followed every rule — but sleep only got harder. It wasn't until she stopped chasing sleep, and started reconnecting with life, that things began to shift. Today, Rebecca lives fully. She has achieved insomnia freedom. Watch/listen to this episode

Sleep was never a problem for Rupsa but after experiencing some professional challenges and moving to a new city, it became a struggle. Although Rupsa found a new job and everything was going well in her life, her struggle with sleep continued. She started to fear each night. Her heart would race. It felt like her mind was working against her. Things started to change when Rupsa realized her mind was actually trying to help her. When she stopped struggling with her thoughts and feelings, when she stopped trying to control sleep, when she practiced accepting what was out of her control, things started to improve. Rupsa now sleeps well and whenever a night of less sleep shows up from time to time, it no longer has any power or influence over her life. Watch/listen to this episode

A few bad nights during a stressful period triggered Tim's struggle with insomnia. The more he tried to fix his sleep, the more difficult it became, the more power and influence it had over his life, and the more anxiety he experienced. Tim's transformation began when he realized that trying to control sleep was keeping him stuck and that his response to the fear of not sleeping was a bigger problem than being awake at night. As Tim relinquished control over sleep and was less resistant to experiencing insomnia and all the thoughts and feelings that come with it, insomnia began to lose the stranglehold it once had over his life — and sleep started to show up all by itself. Watch/listen to this episode

Sophie never thought of herself as a great sleeper but when her son was born, sleep became a real struggle. This was expected in the short-term but when things became more difficult over time, Sophie became increasingly desperate. Listening to the stories of others offered reassurance and gave Sophie a new way forward that led to improvements. Unfortunately, after a few months insomnia returned and seemed to be taking over her life. This is when Sophie committed to an approach that involved committing to actions that reflected who she was and the life she wanted to live, regardless of how she slept. As she did this she realized how much power she still had over her life. How capable and resilient she was, independently of sleep. Sleep started to lose its importance. It became less of a focus. And, as a result, it was able to take care of itself and it lost all its power and influence. Watch/listen to this episode

When Danny experienced sleep disruption during a period of stress and an intense focus on health and fitness, he became very concerned. After reducing the stressors in his life, reducing the intensity of his exercise, and eating more appropriately he noticed that his sleep improved. This led Danny to believe that sleep needed an absence of stress, a certain amount of exercise, and a certain type of diet to happen. When sleep difficulties returned, Danny realized the issue wasn't stress, exercise, or diet. It was all the effort he was putting into sleep. By exploring CBT-I and ACT-I techniques, Danny refocused his attention away from trying to protect or control sleep and toward doing things that mattered to him. With ongoing practice, insomnia lost its power and influence over him, the struggle came to an end, and sleep became effortless. Watch/listen to this episode

When Esther stopped taking a medication for generalized anxiety disorder, sleep became a struggle. New medication helped with her anxiety symptoms but a phobia of insomnia remained, no matter what she tried to do to get her sleep back on track. When we started working together, Esther began to make some changes to deal with her insomnia phobia in a different way. Instead of trying to control sleep, Esther refocused on controlling her actions. She explored and committed to new habits such as going to bed later at night, doing something more pleasant whenever she found herself struggling at night, doing things that mattered independently of sleep, and acknowledging her thoughts and feelings rather than battling with them. This new approach gave Esther more options. Options that helped her reduce the pressure she was putting on herself to make sleep happen and break free of the vicious cycle of more trying to sleep and more difficulty with sleep. As a result, insomnia lost the power and influence it once had over her. Watch/listen to this episode

Irina thought that something was seriously wrong when she experienced a night of no sleep and all her ongoing efforts to make sleep happen were not working. The turning point came when Irina committed to an approach based on accepting the presence of wakefulness and all the difficult thoughts and feelings that came with it. This didn't mean she pretended to like them. This didn't mean she gave up. It meant that she moved away from trying to control what her experience was telling her was out of her control. She practiced and built skill in experiencing insomnia and all the thoughts and feelings associated with it, with less struggle. When she let go of the struggle that came from heroically battling away, trying to fight or avoid what was out of her control, she was able to refocus her energy and attention on actions that helped her live the life she wanted to live. As she did this, her sleep took care of itself and she gained invaluable skills that are now with her for the rest of her life. Watch/listen to this episode

Dulce found that the more she tried to control sleep, the more she struggled with sleep. And, the more she tried to resist the difficult thoughts and feelings that often come with insomnia, the more difficult and powerful those things became. This awareness prompted a change of approach. Dulce let go of her strategy of trying to make sleep happen through effort (even though it was an approach she had been trying to make work for over 15 years). Her new approach involved letting go. She stopped trying to control sleep. She moved away from the sleep efforts, rules, and rituals. She stopped trying to control her thoughts and feelings. She used the energy that was once consumed by an ongoing struggle to commit to actions that helped her live the life she wanted to live. This approach wasn't easy and it took ongoing practice. However, it was an approach that allowed Dulce to take her life back from insomnia. Watch/listen to this episode

Whenever Neseret tried to move away from the medication she had been taking for 13 years, she found sleep impossible. Finding Insomnia Coach and the stories shared on the podcast gave her hope that she could finally leave medication behind. Neseret started a supervised medical taper as she started to practice new skills and habits that moved her away from trying to control sleep and the difficult thoughts and feelings that come with insomnia. Her journey wasn't easy and there were setbacks. However, thanks to her desire to learn, her commitment to action, and her willingness to practice self-compassion, she is now off the medication and living the life she wants to live. Watch/listen to this episode

When Bryan got sick, he had his first sleepless night. Then, he couldn't sleep the next night either. He began to believe he had lost the ability to sleep, which made him very anxious. As sleep took over his life, Bryan stopped doing things he enjoyed and his relationships suffered. The more he tried to sleep, the harder it became, and he felt more anxious and disconnected from who he wanted to be. One night, Bryan accidentally fell asleep without trying. He realized he didn't need to do anything special to sleep. This didn't solve his problems overnight, but it made him change his approach. Bryan started focusing on living his life and doing things that mattered to him. When he had a bad night, he reminded himself of the good nights that required no effort. Over time, as Bryan got his life back to normal, his sleep got back to normal, too. Watch/listen to this episode

Emily's insomnia began four months after her baby was born. She struggled to fall asleep and this led to anxiety and exhaustion. Medication didn't help and her anxiety worsened, leading to panic at bedtime. Emily's transformation started when she changed her approach. She spent less time in bed, engaged in pleasant activities when awake at night, and stopped calculating her nightly sleep duration. She accepted her anxiety and insomnia, allowing them to exist without fighting them. Emily committed to meaningful daily actions, even when tired. By surrendering to whatever happened each night, she freed herself from the pressure of trying to control her sleep. By not trying to control her sleep, it was better able to take care of itself. Emily now goes to bed around 11 PM and wakes naturally around 7 AM — and her focus is on living the life she wants to live. Watch/listen to this episode

Kirstin felt that she had lost her natural ability to sleep. She thought she was broken. She just couldn't sleep without sleeping pills. Every time she tried, she could not sleep. After finding the Insomnia Coach podcast and realizing she wasn't alone, Kirstin changed her approach to sleep. She stopped trying so hard. She stopped doing more. In fact, she started to do less. She abandoned all her sleep efforts, rules, and rituals. She stopped battling with her thoughts and feelings. She started to reclaim her life from insomnia. She went back to drinking coffee. She committed to daytime plans, regardless of how she slept. Kirstin's experience with insomnia provided her with skills that she is using in many areas of her life today. And, she is sleeping without medication. Watch/listen to this episode

Summer's struggle with sleep was taking over her life. No matter what she did to try to fix her sleep, nothing seemed to work. The more she tried to control sleep, the more difficult it became. When Summer stopped trying to make sleep happen and started to allow sleep-related thoughts and feelings to be present without judgement, things started to improve. She practiced being kinder to herself and refocused her attention on doing things that mattered — regardless of how she slept and regardless of the thoughts or feelings that were present. As she did this, Summer started to get her life back from insomnia. Her story shows that sometimes, giving up control is the best way to get it back. Watch/listen to this episode

When Nina fell pregnant she could no longer use the medication she relied upon to get her through occasional periods of insomnia. Her sleep got worse and insomnia seemed to take over her life. Nothing seemed to work and Nina felt stuck. After discovering the Insomnia Coach podcast, Nina realized she wasn't alone. She felt hope. When she enrolled as a client, she started to make change happen. She changed her approach to sleep. She stopped trying to make sleep happen. She changed her response to insomnia. She did things that mattered every day, independently of sleep. The journey wasn't easy — but today, Nina enjoys her bed again. She is being the mom she wants to be. She is doing the work she loves. She has her life back from insomnia. Watch/listen to this episode

Kreuza found cognitive behavioral therapy for insomnia (CBT-I) helpful. However, when sleep problems returned as somniphobia — a fear of sleep itself — the same techniques no longer seemed to work. Kreuza found that creating rules around sleep and trying to change her thoughts and feelings wasn't proving to be helpful. So, she tried a new approach: she let herself think thoughts and feel feelings — even the really difficult ones. She practiced being kind and compassionate to herself. She also did things that mattered to her, even if she didn't sleep well. Today, sleep doesn't impact Kreuza's life, her plans, or her goals. Her story shows us that being patient and kind to ourselves can help us face big fears and that addressing sleep problems in a workable and sustainable way often takes time and ongoing practice. Watch/listen to this episode

Rachel's battle with insomnia began in grad school. Sleep aids and strict routines failed to improve her sleep. Real change came when she moved away from trying to create the perfect conditions for sleep and stopped trying to get rid of certain thoughts and feelings. Rachel's new approach involved being more flexible. She abandoned sleep-related rules and rituals. She practiced building skill in self-kindness and being more present. She opened up and made space for difficult thoughts and feelings to exist. This new approach not only improved her sleep, it also improved her overall quality of life. Listen to this episode

Jessica's struggle with insomnia began on a family trip, and it worsened each time she traveled until it stuck around, even at home. No matter what she tried, her nights were filled with anxiety and struggle. Jessica found that her resistance to insomnia and the difficult thoughts and feelings that often come with it were making things even more difficult. So, she changed her approach. She practiced accepting insomnia and anxiety. She learned to be kinder to herself. With ongoing practice, Jessica freed herself from an ongoing struggle and reclaimed her life from insomnia. Watch/listen to this episode

Eric's battle with insomnia started after a middle-of-the-night panic attack turned sleep into a nightly struggle. In a desperate search for solutions, he made changes that didn't improve his sleep and only ended up pulling him further away from the life he wanted to live. Eric started to isolate himself and considered difficult nights to be a personal failure. The turning point came when Eric shifted his focus. Instead of obsessing over sleep and the difficult thoughts and feelings he was experiencing, he began to prioritize meaningful actions and experiences. He embraced anxiety as an essential component of a fulfilling life, rather than a nemesis to be defeated. Today, Eric's life is no longer ruled by insomnia. By refocusing on what he could control — his actions — he disarmed the power of sleepless nights and the difficult thoughts and feelings that often come with them. Eric didn't just reclaim sleep; he reclaimed his life. Watch/listen to this episode

Gerry's decades-long struggle with insomnia felt like a never-ending battle. The more he tried to force sleep, the worse his insomnia became. His turning point came when he shifted his approach, embracing mindfulness and self-kindness instead of engaging in an ongoing battle. By focusing on the present moment and practicing self-compassion, Gerry found a new, more effective way to approach sleep. The result was transformative: not only did his sleep improve, but his overall quality of life also took a turn for the better. This episode dives deep into Gerry's journey and the specific techniques that led to his transformation. Gerry's experience shows that no matter how long you might struggle with insomnia, it's still possible to break free from the insomnia cycle. Watch/listen to this episode

Anne-Claire experienced sleep issues when she overextended herself running her business. After reducing her workload her sleep didn't get any better. Supplements and medication didn't seem to help. This led her to explore a new approach. Anne-Claire implemented new habits that would help create better conditions for sleep and help starve insomnia of the oxygen it needed to survive. And, instead of trying to fight or avoid difficult the thoughts and feelings that often come with insomnia, she began observing and even welcoming them. As Anne-Claire put less effort into sleep and became more willing to experience insomnia, things improved. Wakefulness and the difficult thoughts and feelings that often come with it started to lose their power and influence and sleep — once again — became effortless. Watch/listen to this episode

Jessy experienced sleep disruption due to the stress of COVID and the breakup of her community. Initially, she found it difficult to fall asleep. Then she started waking during the night and found it hard to get back to sleep. As her sleep got progressively worse, Jessy started to feel scared and worried that she was losing control of her life. She tried medication but it didn't help. She felt desperate and alone. After finding the Insomnia Coach podcast, she found hope in the stories of others. That encouraged her to start taking her life back from insomnia, even while it was still present. She did more of what mattered. She stopped trying to control sleep. She moved away from struggling with her thoughts and feelings (and as she did that she found that her mind could be an unreliable narrator). Today, Jessy considers her sleep to be normal and she feels that her experience with insomnia gave her the opportunity to recognize her own resilience and that gave her the confidence to move forward in life. Watch/listen to this episode

After experiencing anxiety and panic attacks and not sleeping for 72 hours, Maria thought she had lost the ability to sleep. Medication wasn't working. She withdrew from life. She couldn't focus on anything other than sleep. Feeling completely stuck, Maria changed her approach. Instead of trying to fight or avoid insomnia, she allowed it to show up whenever it chose. Instead of trying to fight or avoid the difficult thoughts and feelings that often come with insomnia, she allowed them to come and go as they pleased. Maria also started to do more of the things that mattered to her, even when insomnia was present and even when her mind was telling her she couldn't leave the house. All these actions stripped insomnia of its power and influence and allowed Maria to redirect her energy and attention away from an ongoing struggle and toward living the life she wanted to live. Watch/listen to this episode

Leah experienced insomnia from her teenage years. As an adult it would often come and go, until it came and didn't go! This made it difficult for Leah to live the life she wanted to live. To do the things that mattered to her. Sleeping pills didn't help, and she felt stuck. So, Leah decided to change her approach. She realized that canceling plans after sleepless nights didn't make things any better and so she committed to following through on her plans, regardless of how she felt. Instead of putting effort into sleep, she gave her body the opportunity to take care of sleep all by itself. She also practiced observing her thoughts instead of trying to control them. By doing things that mattered to her, Leah freed herself from the insomnia struggle. Now, sleep feels more natural and she is living the life she wants to live, independently of sleep. Watch/listen to this episode

Amanda's insomnia was triggered by a number of stressors — having a baby, relocating, getting a new job, and dealing with a toxic parent. She tried several sleep aids and implemented a number of sleep rules and rituals but found no real relief until she explored a different approach. She started to acknowledge and accept her thoughts and feelings instead of trying to control them. She started to get more comfortable with nighttime wakefulness. And, she started to focus on the good things in her life and doing things that mattered to her. As a result, she was able to move away from chasing after sleep and successfully reclaimed her life from insomnia. Watch/listen to this episode

Eddie struggled with sleep for over 10 years. During that time he would experience a lot of ups and downs — whenever he thought his sleep was back on track, things would get difficult again. The more difficult sleep proved to be, the more he would struggle. And, when he struggled, he found himself doing less of the things that mattered to him. Eddie's transformation began when he moved away from chasing after sleep and practiced habits that helped create and maintain good conditions for sleep. Perhaps most importantly, he also took the time to identify what insomnia seemed to be stopping him from doing. What it seemed to be taking from him. And then he started to do those things, to take them back, even after difficult nights. Eddie now reflects on his experience with insomnia as something that was actually quite empowering. In Eddie's own words, he's not happy he went through this experience but he's not sad that he went through it, either.

After working with me, Jeannette's sleep improved — but one night she woke up and found that she couldn't fall back to sleep and all her old fears returned. She felt that something must be wrong with her as she found herself waking and finding it impossible to fall back to sleep night after night. This pulled Jeannette back into her old safety behaviors that she knew from experience weren't helpful because she just didn't know what else to do. In this episode, Jeannette describes how she moved away from the insomnia struggle; how she became more comfortable with nighttime wakefulness, how she stopped chasing after sleep, how she started to allow her mind to generate whatever thoughts it chose to generate — even the difficult ones, and how she started to be kinder to herself when things were difficult.

Like many people with chronic insomnia, Eric found that the more he tried to make sleep happen, the more difficult it became. Although he didn't have any real issues falling asleep, he would regularly wake during the night and find it hard to fall back to sleep. His mind would start racing and he would experience a lot of anxiety. Eric found himself getting obsessed with sleep. He was thinking about it all the time and no matter how hard he tried to relax and no matter what he tried, things just didn't improve. When we started working together, one of the first changes Eric made was to reduce the amount of time he allotted for sleep to more closely match the amount of sleep he was getting at the time. Eric also started to respond to nighttime wakefulness in a more workable way. Finally, Eric committed to doing things that mattered to him — to live the kind of life he wanted to live — independently of sleep. Eric experienced rapid improvements in his sleep as he changed his response to insomnia and all the difficult thoughts and feelings that come with it. He no longer takes sleeping pills and today, more than one-and-a-half years after we worked together, Eric is no longer engaged in a daily (and nightly) battle with his mind and he continues to sleep well.

Vicky dealt with her insomnia by taking sleeping pills and this seemed to work well until one night, after 20 years of regular use, the medication didn't help her sleep. This led Vicky to think that something was wrong with her. She felt alone. She started to experience a lot of anxiety and would wake up in the middle of the night and have panic attacks. This all led Vicky to explore a new approach to insomnia that involved letting go of the struggle. She began to recognize that difficult thoughts and feelings, although very unpleasant, didn't need to prevent her from doing things that mattered — so she didn't need to engage in a battle with them. She committed to doing things that were important and meaningful even after difficult nights and even in the presence of uncomfortable thoughts and feelings. Today, Vicky still experiences some difficult nights from time to time but she is no longer engaged in an exhausting and distracting battle with her mind throughout the day and throughout the night. She is living the kind of life she wants to live even when difficult nights happen and even when uncomfortable thoughts and feelings show up. In fact, Vicky now thinks of her insomnia as a gift — as something that has helped her become more resilient and better able to react in a more workable way to the difficulties we all experience as human beings.

Jim struggled with insomnia for over 10 years. At first, he thought it was a symptom of heavy drinking, a poor diet, working late, and experiencing a lot of stress. However, the insomnia stuck around even after Jim addressed these issues. This led to many years of ongoing sleep disruption, fear, frustration, and anxiety. In this episode, Jim shares the changes he made that helped him put his insomnia behind him. Ultimately, Jim stopped trying to fight or avoid nighttime wakefulness. He stopped trying to fight or avoid the difficult thoughts and feelings that often come with nighttime wakefulness. Today, Jim knows that he can still enjoy really good nights of sleep — even after the most stressful days — because he is no longer engaged in a competition with sleep.

Nick's insomnia journey began in 2000 when he relocated and started a new job. Stress, uncertainty, and anxiety took over his life as he found that the more he tried to fight or avoid his thoughts the more powerful they became. Nick felt helpless. He didn't know how to deal with the difficult thoughts and feelings he was experiencing and he didn't know how to improve his sleep. The more he tried, the more he struggled. In this episode, Nick shares how he adopted a new approach to dealing with difficult thoughts and feelings. Instead of trying to control them, he began to acknowledge them and make space for them. Instead of fighting with them and getting distracted by them, he validated them and then redirected his attention on actions that would help him move toward the life he wanted to live. Nick practiced kindly bringing his mind back to the present whenever it started to time travel. He began to notice and savor all the things he was missing out on when he found himself running on autopilot. He started to focus on living a life aligned with his values — doing things that were important to him — even after difficult nights and even in the presence of uncomfortable thoughts and feelings. Today, Nick has a different and more workable relationship with sleep and the full range of thoughts and feelings he experiences as a human being. He is no longer haunted by sleep. He sees sleep as part of his life but not his entire life.

Adam's insomnia began the night before an important work presentation. After a really difficult night, Adam ended up calling in sick — and this planted a seed in his mind that told him that difficult nights would mean he couldn't go through with important plans. In this episode, Adam shares how he learned to let go of his anxiety, his anger, his fear, and his intense desire to avoid nighttime wakefulness. He also talks about the benefits of self-kindness and how he managed to separate how he slept at night from his ability to engage in things that would help him live the kind of life he wanted to live and be the kind of person he wanted to be.

As Juergen got older, his sleep began to change. Although this is normal, Juergen didn't know that at the time! And, just as he began to pay more attention to sleep, COVID hit, work stress increased, and all the places he used to enjoy going to got shut down. Juergen felt as though insomnia and all the difficult thoughts and feelings that come with it were starting to control his life. He felt as though he was losing himself and getting pulled away from the kind of life he wanted to live. This was when we started working together. Ultimately, Juergen became more willing to experience nighttime wakefulness. He became more accepting of the difficult thoughts and feelings that would show up. Juergen discovered that as long as he didn't try to battle with all the stuff that was out of his control he could free up all that energy to do things that would help him live the kind of life he wanted to live instead. The skills Juergen learned and repeatedly practiced also helped when tinnitus returned after a long absence. As a result, all the difficult stuff that is out of his control now has far less of an influence over his life — and he is also sleeping a lot better!

Kristina had a very stressful job. One night, her husband woke her suddenly after experiencing a really bad nightmare. This event seemed to trigger the release of a lot of anxiety that had been building for some time and Kristina was unable to fall back to sleep. Unfortunately, sleep proved to be difficult on subsequent nights, too — and this created even more worry and anxiety. At first, Kristina found that she could fall asleep but would wake in the middle of the night with a racing mind and find it hard to fall back to sleep. This then shifted into difficulty falling asleep — and this change created even more anxiety and sleep disruption. After trying lots of things that didn't seem to help, Kristina started to do things that are known to starve insomnia of the oxygen it needs to survive. Instead of chasing sleep by going to bed earlier and staying in bed later, she started going to bed later at night — when she felt truly sleepy enough for sleep, rather than fatigued. She got out of bed by the same time each morning — no matter what. Whenever being awake at night didn't feel good, she did something more enjoyable instead. Perhaps most importantly, though, Kristina decided to work on shifting her focus back to the present moment and what was in her control. She engaged in things each day that helped her continue to move toward the kind of life she wanted to live, independently of sleep and even in the presence of difficult thoughts and feelings.

Deeandra always slept well but a stressful period in her life led to 48 hours of no sleep whatsoever and this generated a lot of anxiety. Deeandra started to panic and thought that she had lost the ability to sleep. Doctors gave her different medications that didn't always seem to be helpful and came with their own set of side effects. For three years, Deeandra put her life on hold while she engaged in a long list of rituals and experiments in an attempt to improve her sleep. Gradually, Deeandra moved away from trying to control sleep and avoid nighttime wakefulness. She started to go to bed only when sleepy enough for sleep. She decided to live her life regardless of how she slept at night. She started to do things she'd withdrawn from — she no longer canceled plans, she started to exercise again. Little by little she reclaimed her life from insomnia — and her sleep began to improve. Today, Deeandra averages around six to seven hours of sleep. She still has difficult nights from time to time but they no longer have such an effect on her life. In Deeandra's own words, "life is about the time we spend awake, not the time that we sleep".

Wayne's experience with insomnia began when he was preparing for his board exams. Because he needed to get up earlier than usual, he started going to bed earlier than usual. Unfortunately, this made it harder for Wayne to fall asleep — and, as a result, nights started to become stressful and he began to experience a lot of sleep-related anxiety. Ultimately, Wayne got his sleep back on track by recognizing that sleep is a natural process that doesn't require or respond well to effort. He started to go to bed later at night. He started to make some space for difficult thoughts, feelings, and emotions rather than trying to fight them, and he reminded himself that sleep always happens in the end. This process took time but today, Wayne thinks of sleep as a friend — not as an enemy or something to be feared. He no longer puts pressure on himself to sleep and he no longer puts any effort into sleep. As a result, he sleeps well and is living the kind of life he wants to live.

Felicity had struggled with sleep, on and off, for her entire life. Usually, her sleep would get back on track after a few months of sleep disruption — however, when sleep issues returned due to some big life changes, Felicity's sleep didn't recover. Fortunately, Felicity was able to get her sleep back on track and change her mindset about sleep by implementing behaviors that created better conditions for sleep. She practiced self-care and did things that helped her continue to move toward the kind of life she wanted to live, independently of sleep. Sleep is no longer something that gets in the way of Felicity's life — she lives her life independently of sleep and, as a result, she is sleeping well and living well.

Night after night of wakefulness led Amy to a dark place where she saw no way out. She felt helpless and doomed to a life of insomnia. Ironically, Amy became friends with someone else who was struggling with insomnia. This friend ended up enrolling as a client of mine and started to experience improvements in their sleep. Amy learned more about the behavioral changes he was making, and — even though she assumed these wouldn't work for her — she figured she was already suffering so much, nothing she could do could make her situation worse. So, Amy started to spend less time in bed, she abandoned her sleep rituals, and she shifted away from trying to control sleep and all the thoughts and worries her mind would generate. After weeks of ups and downs, Amy started to get more sleep, more consistently. Now, she averages around seven or more hours of sleep each night and considers her transformation nothing short of a miracle. Amy's story shows that no matter how desperate things feel, no matter how severe your insomnia may be, there is always hope. If you are willing and able to make some changes to your current sleep habits and your current relationship with the difficult thoughts and emotions that like to accompany insomnia, you can get to a place where you will realize that you CAN sleep!

Jennifer's issues with sleep began 18 years ago when she started to wean her firstborn from breastfeeding. When Jennifer fell pregnant again, things got better — until it was time to wean her second child. As the mother of five children, Jennifer went through this cycle for a long time — and when she decided that she was done having children, she started to get really nervous about sleep. After listening to a few episodes of the Insomnia Coach podcast, Jennifer felt that it was her belief system that was the real reason why she was enduring an endless struggle with sleep. At this point, she felt ready to implement some changes that would lead to new habits and a new relationship with her thoughts and beliefs that would help create better conditions for sleep. Ultimately, Jennifer regained confidence in her natural ability to sleep after learning that she wasn't alone and that other people were experiencing insomnia in a similar way to her, and by making changes to her behaviors and the relationship she had with her thoughts. It was these changes that helped create better conditions for sleep and helped Jennifer put chronic insomnia behind her.

In 2019, Jovana experienced a night of no sleep whatsoever but she was confident that she would get some sleep the following night. However, the next night was just the same — Jovana didn't get one minute of sleep. At this point, she started to panic, and her anxiety was further compounded by the fact she was a new mom. Jovana started to dread going to bed. She felt frustrated. She felt lonely. Fortunately, she found the Insomnia Coach YouTube channel and the Insomnia Coach podcast and started to realize that she was not alone and that her insomnia was not unusual or unique. Ultimately, Jovana stopped the endless sleep-related research and ongoing detective work. She stopped experimenting with medication and supplements. She started to remove herself from the process of sleep and began to accept that sleep cannot be controlled. At the same time, she committed to actions that helped her move toward the kind of life she wanted to live, even after difficult nights and even in the presence of difficult thoughts, feelings, and emotions. As a result, Jovana regained confidence in her natural ability to sleep and is once again living the kind of life she wants to live.

Cindy developed postpartum depression shortly after her daughter was born and was prescribed medication to help her sleep. The medication seemed to work at first but Cindy soon found that it wasn't helping and this led to more anxiety and more sleep difficulties. Ultimately, Cindy stopped putting pressure on herself to sleep. She stopped striving for sleep, she stopped putting effort into sleep, she stopped trying to fight or avoid sleep-related anxiety, and she started to recognize that all the anxious thoughts produced by her brain were just that — thoughts. Nothing more and nothing less. Today, Cindy doesn't take any sleep medication and she is sleeping well. Perhaps one of the biggest insights she shared is that she no longer uses sleep itself as a measure of her success. In Cindy's words, it's our relationship with sleep that is the true measure of success.

Jake's sleep was severely disrupted when the COVID pandemic forced him to work from home. He soon found himself working at all hours and during weekends. When he took a vacation he found it really hard to get any sleep at all and this led to a lot of sleep-related research, a lot of anxiety, and a lot of worry. As Jake learned more about sleep and insomnia he started to implement evidence-based techniques to help build sleep drive, strengthen his body clock, and weaken arousal. He started to spend less time in bed, he got out of bed during the night if being in bed didn't feel good, and — perhaps most importantly of all — he tried to live the kind of life he wanted to live during the day, independently of how he slept. Now, Jake's life doesn't revolve around sleep and he no longer tries to control sleep or put effort into sleep. As a result, he is sleeping a lot better and has regained confidence in his natural ability to sleep.

From a very young age, Celia would often try to control her sleep and often used medication to get her through her frequent bouts of insomnia. After the birth of her son and the emergence of the COVID pandemic, Celia became even more fixated on sleep. All of her old sleep crutches seemed to stop working and she didn't know what to do. Celia recognized that it was her desire to control sleep and her sleep-related thoughts that was a big part of the problem. When she was able to accept that she couldn't directly control sleep or her thoughts and committed to implementing behaviors that would create better conditions for sleep and help her live life according to her values, she was able to starve her insomnia of the oxygen it craved and enjoy the life (and sleep) that she wanted.

Chad experienced some sleepless nights during a stressful period at work but his sleep started to get back on track — until one completely sleepless night created an avalanche of anxiety and insomnia. Fortunately, Chad discovered that it was his obsession with sleep and the changes he had made in response to difficult nights that were giving insomnia the oxygen it needed to survive. So, he started to undo all those changes. By abandoning all efforts to create or control sleep and by living his life according to his values, regardless of how he slept, Chad was able to shift attention away from sleep, create better conditions for sleep to happen, and put his insomnia behind him.

Pat decided to approach each day pretending that she'd had a good night of sleep. She went about her days as normal and pursued enjoyable and enriching daytime activities, independently of how she slept. She also stopped talking about insomnia. Pat shifted her attention away from sleep and refused to allow sleep to control her life. She also stopped all attempts to control anxious thoughts and instead, chose to acknowledge and accept them. The final piece of the puzzle came when Pat was able to abandon all attempts to control her progress and was able to accept that sleep is something that cannot be controlled. As Pat discovered, if we can place less importance on sleep and refuse to allow sleep to control our lives, sleep often becomes a whole lot easier!

Like many of us, Hannah began experiencing sleep disruption during the COVID pandemic. When it became clear that lockdowns were likely to be extended, Hannah started to find it harder to fall asleep. Before long, she also found it hard to stay asleep, too. In this episode, Hannah talks about the new sleep habits she developed and how she changed her relationship with sleep-related thoughts, and tested the sleep-related beliefs that made sleep more difficult. Ultimately, Hannah found that abandoning all attempts to control sleep, accepting difficult nights of sleep and sleep-related worry, committing to new sleep habits, and going about her days as normally as possible really helped her get her sleep back on track.

Susie never had a great relationship with sleep — but dealing with her insomnia wasn't something that was high on her list of priorities. That all changed, however, when Susie went overseas and her sleeping pills seemed to suddenly stop working. Quite understandably, Susie's anxiety skyrocketed and she ended up cutting her vacation short and returning home. In this episode, Susie talks about the changes she made to create significantly better conditions for sleep. She also discusses the challenges she faced as she implemented these changes, and describes the ups and downs she experienced along the way. Today, Susie loves her bedroom, loves sleep, and is confident in her natural ability to sleep.

Michelle spent 15 years researching sleep and trying lots of different things to get rid of her insomnia. She did all she could to control her sleep but all that happened was sleep (or a lack of it) ended up controlling her as it slowly became an obsession and took a hugely influential role in her life. In this episode, Michelle shares the techniques she found most helpful, talks about the short-term difficulties she experienced when changing her sleep habits, and shares how she ended up modifying two core behavioral techniques — sleep restriction and stimulus control — to better suit her while also abandoning all efforts to control sleep.

Jennifer's insomnia was deeply entrenched. After working with me for four weeks, she felt as though it was becoming more difficult to get through the day, her sleep had not improved, and she was understandably feeling discouraged. However, Jennifer kept going and four weeks later she was happier with her progress. She was experiencing less daytime fatigue and getting more sleep but she was still finding it hard to fall back to sleep when she woke during the night. In this episode, Jennifer shares how she coped with setbacks by focussing on the process rather than progress and tells us about the moment she realized that she knew exactly how to respond to sleep disruption and understood that she was now armed with life-long skills that would enable her to enjoy better sleep for the rest of her life.

When Jessica moved back to her hometown with her husband and two children she began to struggle with sleep. When nothing she tried seemed to work, she started to believe that she'd lost the ability to sleep and was losing hope — until she learned more about how insomnia develops and realized that her insomnia wasn't unique or unusual. When Jessica recognized many of the common thoughts and behaviors that perpetuate sleep disruption in her own experience with insomnia, she started to feel a sense of hope. This allowed her to start exploring and challenging her beliefs about sleep while implementing behaviors that build sleep drive, strengthen the body clock, and reduce sleep-related worry and anxiety. Today, Jessica rarely thinks about sleep and it no longer controls her life.

Anafer believed that she was born with insomnia. Sleep was a problem for her for as long as she could remember. After years of doing her own research, speaking with health professionals, and taking various supplements and prescription pills, Anafer's insomnia was becoming unbearable. After graduating from college, Anafer decided she needed to address her sleep issues before starting her career in dietetics. Two years ago, she came across my online coaching course and is now here to share her transformation and the ups and downs she experienced on her journey to better sleep and restored sleep confidence.

Dr. Mendelson is a psychiatrist, sleep doctor, and author who works primarily in the field of sleep research and sleep medicine. He is perhaps best known for his research related to the properties of sleeping pills and the effect of medication on sleep. In this episode, Dr. Mendelson describes the evolution of sleeping pills, explains how they work, and shares information on their potential side-effects. We also talk about over-the-counter pills and supplements, and the evidence-based alternative to sleeping pills and recommended first-line treatment for chronic insomnia — cognitive behavioral therapy for insomnia (CBT-I).