A dry-humored army veteran armed with sound-effects; a car-nerd with embarrassing stories & social poop anxieties; & a curmudgeonly, neurotic PC gamer who bought a house, walk into a podcast studio… Welcome to PATG. This weekly podcast features a cranky group of non-pretentious friends & guests co…
Episode 511: A snowstorm hits Pittsburgh and Andrew is late. Brett had a cold. Snow tires. Updates to the studio. Puke wants a pool table, Andrew argues ping pong is better. VR ping pong. Boston. Andrew disappointed to find only sushi at a sushi restaurant. Football.
Episode 510: How's the weather? Then it goes downhill from there. Andrew sees more cops and feels less free in NH. A retarded man tells us to fuck off. Puke's car gets damaged. Brett loves model trains. Workplace injuries. Planet fitness hate. When is the sunrise. Brett and Andrew try to do math to figure out the Earth Number (TM).
Episode 509: Happy New Year! Do you remember drinks with chewy bubbles in them? Micheal Keaton. Andrew visits a bar that "King Pin" was filmed at. Will the CRV get better soon? What is thrust alignment? Movies were better before 9/11. Top Gun! Yellowstone! Beandana? Salad gifts for Brett. The rocketbook. Phishing emails. Andrew is going to Boston.
Episode 508: Merry Christmas! Sorry for the bad audio. Brett is in NH and about to visit Boston. Andrew likes living in horse country. The "science" of weighted blankets. VR mini-golf and ping-pong. Q-amom. What does "based" even mean? Andrew ruins his back. Puke rants about taxes, Andrew rants about Puke's rant. Fearful people are the most dangerous. Twice stolen burritos in Columbus.
Episode 507: What is the lowest scoring football game? COVID signs trying to be cute. How to spell some Polish guys name. Elites can't control the information. B & G go to the wrong bar. Xmas gifts from Gabriela. Andrew goes to Miami and parties like a rock star. There was a buffet! Yacht. No homeless in Miami. Fuck Uber. Where are the tokens?
Episode 506: We just got back from the gym and didn't fill the trough. What is horchata? Andrew likes being called "Mister". The bodybuilder toothbrush. Rage against the GrubHub. Owen or Luke Wilson? Don Jon. Andrew's sewer is clogged again. Puke water heater is dead. Go pee in the yard. Andrew again interrogates and berates Puke about his involvement in NFT's.
Episode 505: Andrew and Alex are back from Nicaragua. Shocking news about Puke's cold last week. Brett goes to a tarot card reading. We start a new gang called the Scrabbly Bois. What is a henge? Chicken assassination. Alex takes too long to buy art. Andrew almost fights a Nica trying to scam him. How much cheese? Monkeys! Suspicious items clogging Andrew's plumbing. Nicaragua has the loudest music.
Episode 504: Puke is filled with mouse poop dust after the move. Hunters are everywhere around the new studio. Brett prepared a full Thanksgiving feast and doxxes his whole family. There are too many seltzers. Dinner with angry feminists. How are people living in different realties? Are the hypnotized? The Omicron variant is coming to kill us all!
Episode 503: We finally have a new studio in an unfinished basement. It's been a crazy week of moving. The mannequin and podium are back! There are rugs hanging from the ceiling. What name will Danny and Alice choose? Did Andrew get hit on by a Scottish man?
Episode 502: Portmansheau is on the move again. The Butler basement studio is gone and awaiting its new home. In the meantime, we are recording at Brett's sexy lounge style studio on a casting couch. Nacho dinner. Andrew is homeless with many homes. Matthew Lesko. Spork. What is a neck gator? We have a listener porn star. Giant rugs. Cold dips in the morning.
Episode 501: Puke is making too much noise in the gym, but so are the teens. Different ways to try intermittent fasting and other bio-hacking. Pizza Twist! Seinfeld is Andrew's guide to life. Are we entering a "Fourth Turning" of humanity? Trundle Manor. Andrew's back is broken again. Why don't we eat more lamb? PUMP!
Episode 499: An angry man sends emails. Should men use emojis? Gabriela goes to a climbing gym. Andrew discovers Seinfeld memes. Dune. Trying to explain what this show is to a stranger. What is blue comedy? Crypto rants from Andrew. Everything Puke loves is under attack. The fourth largest Amish community in the world. Puke's eyebrows need plucked.
Episode 498: The animals are pooping. Squirrels have bluetooth. Why are poor people so loud? A haunted hayride. TDZ was disrupted by a tornado over Butler. We tour a house made to survive Y2K. A head injury at work. Smoking cat turds.
Episode 497: Andrew is back and we find out why he was gone. Was it his hatred of musicals? Or his love of Pittsburgh stairs? Are food shortages coming? What are the best paper towels? Puke gets great seats for the Pittsburgh Penguins home opener game. Brett sees "Sweet Girl" and "My Octopus Teacher". Chipmunks are in the walls.
Episode 494: It's the end of September! How do bears hibernate? We never find out. Instead, we discuss the Pittsburgh Fatties Social Club and cliche industrial themed coffee shops. Who invited this cat? There are too many peppers. Tiny spoons of poop being mailed to a lab. Brett does to a colonial fair. Andrew doesn't wear a mask. Is Pittsburgh falling apart as we witness a street corner fight.
Episode 493: It's a full house! Author of the book "Story of Nowhere" Danny and his wife Alice are visiting Pittsburgh. This turned into a very long show! We discussed in no particular order; Asians, Amish, detergent, tofu, dating an Amish, not dating an Amish, smelly curry, body odor, city garbage, shipping containers, Lex Luthor, Australia, vaccine mandates, unions, Gung Ho with Micheal Keaton, the black community, St. Patrick's Day parade in September, a poopitraitor in the house, found underwear, poop analysis, Pittsburgh drivers, ping pong, and Nicki Minaj!
Episode 492: Brett almost has a Chinese food butt disaster. Getting asked about being vaccinated by strangers. When are we getting a new studio? Andrew has Jew dinner. Did Alex break more appliances? Crows are amazing and terrifying. Andrew gets mad at Game of Thrones references.
Episode 491: Should we make the show into an NFT? Andrew gets mad about that and rants about Kaczynski and the Amish. Alex thinks all Amish kick chickens. Brett gets a cops attention because of a stupid bus. Alex notices a new coffee maker. How many steps are in Pittsburgh? Fancy cocktail party with robots. Did one of us have a heart attack at the gym? Pickleball.
Episode 490: Andrew is reunited with his precious Honda CRV. Brett had quite the adventure with the CRV in New Hampshire. Gym update. What is "nut to butt"? Our fun weekend in Pittsburgh after Ep489 with Alex, Drew, and Nick. Why is our coffee maker broken? Andrew hates birthdays.
Episode 489: We have a full house with Drew Sample, Young Alex, and Yak Nick joining us to discuss our time at the MPLF in Michigan. Is Ohio the worst state? The situation in Afghanistan. Does Drew look like actor Oliver Platt? Public speaking. Land weed. Whiskey.
Episode 488: Recorded before a high studio audience at the Midwest Peace and Liberty Fest in Michigan. We fought through a horde of mosquitoes and boogaloo LARPers for an impromptu presentation of our most sophisticated toilet humor. We only lost half the crowd by the end of the show and Eric (from "in the chat" fame) gave us a gift! At one point the speakers exploded with horrid feedback.
Episode 487: Brett is back on the webs but needs a pseudonym. Puke makes awful noises at the gym. Who is King of the Bed? We watch videos from the 2020 Olympics that are happening in 2021. How many cylinders does a Rolls Royce have? Andrew went to Brooklyn and bought a new car. Puke apologizes.
Episode 486: Our 10 year anniversary is here! Or is it? We'll never agree. Stephen Colbert, old CNN propaganda, reading children's books in Spanish, slipper disaster, socks by the pound, gym successes and failures, is Andrew a stalker? Puke's studio cat, Niko has passed away and emotions get heated. Thanks whiskey!
Episode 485: We argue over when the 10 year anniversary is. Brett is under attack by NH Dems. Andrew wants a Facebook friend. How smart are we? Are retards happy? Corky from Life Goes On. Andrew narrowly avoids death in his Miata. Brett thinks he's Asian. Puke recommends a book about Afghanistan that is helping him cope with his past.
Episode 484: Welcome to all of our NSA listening party fans! We are doing our best to not spread misinformation. That's a lie and so are the Aztec horse-gods. Can you breath with flour-mouth? Fuck meme culture. E-world. Getting caught. The Amish. Andrew's gravesite. A massage gun. Global currency conspiracy. Bitcoin.
Episode 482: Andrew has had a bad week of fuck-ups made worse by his mother ruining his plans. Did our parents really teach us anything? Plunger update and controversy. The land of a thousand islands and no dressing. Brett wants a slave island. Choking on Amish popcorn. The female Nick. A classic South Carolina Early Morning Park Fight.
Episode 481: Andrew is out of town so Puke, Brett, and Gabriela are here to discuss the latest vaccine conspiracies. Racist drug stores. Pegged pants. Brett's lack of vision. Why would anyone live in California? Brett's friend hates the Jews. Gabriela gets slap bracelet money. Birthing persons.
Episode 480: Brett is back this week with his girlfriend Gabriela. We can't pronounce her name. There are plumbing problems all around. Some pets are illegal in PA, but not alligators. Walmart has asparagus. Andrew can't find a door at Ulta Beauty nor the creamer at the gas station. Which dollar store is Andrew's favorite?
Episode 475: Puke is coming home! Alex finds Brett pooping in the wrong bathroom and threw a baby into a fan. Brett puts hot sock rice on his nethers. Andrew goes bowling with the whites and drinking with the blacks.
Episode 465: Puke is now in LA and surrounded by the loudest of people in an ABNB that isn't a stand-alone house. Andrew and Brett went to South Carolina for the pineapples. What would you do if you would die in five minutes? Trying to pee in a cup inside of a car.
Episode 463: We've decided to change the format of the show to a coffee table book. Are women more attractive based on their name alone? Should a man wear slippers outside the house? Will VR ruin the world? What is the problem with the new gym? We answer none of these questions.