Podcasts about Warhammer

Episode 271 of The Independent Characters is our annual 2025 Warhammer Year in Review, and it's all about taking a breath, looking back, and celebrating another packed year in the hobby. We dig into our favorite releases of 2025 across games, models, and supplements, talk about what really landed for us at the table, and reflect on the trends that shaped how we played, painted, and engaged with Warhammer this year. As always, the conversation goes beyond just "what came out," touching on how these releases impacted our enjoyment of the hobby and the broader community. This episode also marks the long-awaited return of Josh, who jumps right back into the mix and brings his perspective, enthusiasm, and sharp takes to the discussion. While Adan was originally slated to join us, a scheduling mix-up kept him from making the recording – but don't worry, he's very much part of the wrap-up. We'll be closing out 2025 properly with Adan in a special Patreon episode coming soon, where we'll finish the year together and add even more reflection to an already memorable season. Episode 271 is equal parts retrospective, celebration, and setup for what's next – a fitting way to close the book on 2025 and get ready for whatever the next year of Warhammer throws at us. We hope you enjoy! Time Stamps: 0:00:00 – Show Intro, Elite Choice, Hobby Progress, and Games Played 0:58:45 – 2025 Warhammer Year in Review Part 1 1:28:20 – 2025 Warhammer Year in Review Part 2 1:56:40 – Final Discussion and Show Closing Relevant Links: The Independent Characters Patreon Tablewar! – SPONSOR Herrick Games & Hobbies – SPONSOR Goonhammer Media Network Adepticon Games Workshop The Black Library

We're looking at some of the ways you can deal with tactics when you rock up to a table especially when you haven't had a chance to know what you're playing against first[0:01:46] Intro[0:06:00] Game Tactics[1:03:00] ish Patreon Shoutouts[1:31:40] Brief ToW Meta Analysis[1:42:31] Hobby[1:57:04] WrapupLucent Art Light - https://gameenvy.net/lucent-art-light/gommo's Shaggoth - Clay beast creations - https://www.myminifactory.com/object/3d-print-ancient-centigon-207675Support the ShowJoin the Patreon -https://patreon.com/oldworldfanaticsShop Old World @ Element Games - https://elementgames.co.uk/wargames-and-miniatures-by-game/warhammer-the-old-worldLinks and ShoutoutsOld World Rankings - https://oldworldrankings.com/auAustralian Discord Server - https://discord.gg/yYaTG5svBVFollow UsYouTube - https://www.youtube.com/@oldworldfanaticsBluesky - https://bsky.app/profile/oldworldfanatics.comInstagram - https://www.instagram.com/oldworldfanaticsThreads - https://www.threads.net/@oldworldfanaticsEmail - oldworldfanatics@gmail.comHuge thanks to our monthly supporters!

WINNERS and LOSERS of Blood Bowl Season 3 | Bonehead Podcast #174 YouTube: https://youtu.be/VpyumInWRk8 Links: Patreon Link: https://www.patreon.com/c/TheBoneheadPodcast Brushtithe Painting by Bloodtithe! https://www.brushtithe.com/ — Get Your BHPC Loot here: https://boneheadpodcast.com/shop https://shop.spreadshirt.co.uk/bonehead-podcast/ Patreon Link: https://www.patreon.com/c/TheBoneheadPodcast Come join us on the Bonehead Podcast Discord: https://discord.gg/yGtuTseENb #BloodBowl #Warhammer #GamesWorkshop #Bloodbowl2020 Blood Bowl,Blood Bowl 2020,Warhammer,Games Workshop,Bonehead Championship,Bonehead Podcast,Dungeon Bowl

Hide your kids, hide your wallets - GREG'S BACK. Aaron, Gerry, and Greg rip and tear into some news and then discuss sweet games like Space Marine 2, Metroid Prime 4: Beyond, Doom: The Dark Ages, Suikoden, and WAY MORE. Also Greg's a cat in this episode, so that's fucking cool.

Join the global camaraderie on "Kill Team Casuals," the podcast where three enthusiasts from different corners of the world come together to discuss the epic battles and laid-back vibes of Warhammer 40,000 Kill Team by Games Workshop.Meet our hosts Russ, Rhys and Ben, each representing a unique time zone and bringing a distinct flavor to the discussion. Whether it's dawn, noon, or dusk in their respective locations, these gents share their experiences, strategies, and tales from the tabletop battlefield, all with a casual and fun-loving twist.In this episode, journey with the Kill Team Casuals as they bridge the gap between time zones to explore the latest in Kill Team lore, tactics, and community happenings. From favorite factions to memorable gaming moments, these three amigos break down the complexities of the 41st millennium in a way that's both informative and entertaining.Support the show

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¡Ha llegado el tercer ajuste de equilibrio de la tercera temporada de Décima Edición! Estos cambios de reglas y puntos llegan en diciembre para cubrir este invierno de juego de Warhammer 40k. Junto a Mancuso analizamos todos estos cambios para conocer cambios de reglas y puntos que de forma directa o indirecta afectan a todos los jugadores de Warhammer 40k, y especialmente a quienes además reciben nuevos destacamentos con los que jugar de forma diferente sus colecciones de miniaturas. ¿Te gusta lo que hacemos y quieres apoyarnos y de paso participar en el sorteo mensual de 400€ en material de Warhammer 40k? Dale al botón de "Apoyar" en iVoox. Tendrás una participación por 2,99€, tres participaciones por 4,99€, siete participaciones por 9,99€, y otras siete por cada bloque de 9,99€. Más detalle en nuestra web, https://www.lavozdehorus.com/ 00:00:00 Presentación e introducción 00:09:29 Ajustes a los Xenos y las Ligas de los Votann 00:31:19 Ajustes al Imperio 00:51:48 Ajustes a los Marines Espaciales 01:14:17 Ajustes al Caos Escúchanos mientras pintas minis o mientras sacas el perro a pasear. No importa el momento, pero cuenta con nosotros para ser tu programa semanal de referencia sobre Warhammer 40.000. Toda la música de este podcast está licenciada en Jamendo y Dark Fantasy Studio. El corte de fondo inicial es licencia Creative Commons de Royalty Free Kings utilizada con permiso de su autor Mark Petrie. Escucha el episodio completo en la app de iVoox, o descubre todo el catálogo de iVoox Originals

Miracle On Route 34: Part 2 Virginia and Santa face extreme danger together. Based on a post by BiscuitHammer, in 3 parts. Listen to the Podcast at Steamy Stories. Someone attacked Santa with a wicked-looking spiked hand-axe, something out of a sci-fi movie. He batted the weapon aside and clapped his open hands across the man's ears, busting his brain. Before he dropped, Santa grabbed the corpse and swung it around in a wide arc, smashing it into the foes surrounding him and knocking them back. "Shit!" Ginny squealed as one of the targets landed near her. "It's like the fucking Matrix in here!" As he threw the corpse away, he paused very briefly and glanced at her. "Since you happen to be right there, how about a little mood music?" "What?" "I'm just saying some music would be nice if we're going to be doing this," he called. "You're next to the entertainment system, how about putting something on?" "You’re shitting me, right?" she almost complained, wincing as she heard something delicate-sounding and expensive smash behind her amidst the wild brawl. She stared at the multimedia system, flapping her arms in frustration as she tried to focus through the noise. This couldn't be happening. She clutched the sleeves of her plush robe for a moment, trying to concentrate on its soft, fuzzy texture and center herself. She'd almost forgotten the large nerf gun in her hands but ignored it now, fixing her gaze on the mp3 playlist. She pressed a button. "Silent night; Holy night;" Bing crooned through the room. "Not really what I had in mind!" Santa mentioned loudly as he rammed his knee into a man's chin. "Try again!" Ginny bit her lip and pressed the button again, this time rewarded with Gary Glitter singing 'Another Rock And Roll Christmas'. "Still not quite there," he said as he snapmared another foe. "Better, but not quite!" "Well I don't know!" she shouted in exasperation. "What kind of music do you put on while Santa kills things in your living room?" Santa turned sideways and thrust his foot out, kicking an intruder in the chest and sending him sprawling backwards, rolling head over heels until he thumped into the entertainment system, jolting it and skipping the player. "I am a bitch. How do you want me? From behind, or on my knees? I am a slut, please hold me down, I'll be your noise, This shit will fuck you up!" "Perfect!" he declared as he fought, swarmed once again by foes. "Seriously?" Ginny yelled. "Combichrist is Santa's fucking fighting groove?" "I'm trying to figure out why you have it on your playlist," Santa replied. "I don't remember you liking aggrotech!" "Why the hell do you of all people even know what it is?" she shot back, wincing as she watched another body sail into the opposite wall with a sickening crunch before dropping to the floor and leaving a huge, crumbling dent in the stone. 'This Shit Will Fuck You Up!' "I prefer the term 'Hellektro' myself," he added. "And I know all songs, silly. I remember when the Dayglo Abortions wrote that 'Hey Santa!' song back in the '80's, they didn't get presents for” "I didn't ask, why are you answering?" she hissed. "Kill! Kill!" All the while, the pounding rhythms of the music filled the room. "I am a bitch. How do you want me? From behind, or on my knees? I am a slut, please hold me down, I'll be your noise, This shit will fuck you up!" "Well, at least we know why it's on your playlist, anyway!" he mentioned as he broke someone's back over his knee. "Very funny, red man!" Ginny hissed, scowling. She ducked wildly as another assailant flew overhead and landed in the Jacuzzi, his neck slamming against the hard edge with a snap noise and then tilting at a strange angle, his eyes wide and unseeing. "Fucking hell," she muttered. "These guys eat too much red meat!" Santa smashed two heads together before punting a third man in the chest, sending him staggering back until he fell against the entertainment unit, right next to Ginny, his eyes spiraling in his head. She scowled down at him for a moment before smashing the pitcher of nog on his cranium and sending him to the floor. Every single intruder stopped and turned to look at her suddenly, their eyes narrowing and turning very yellow. "Eep;" Ginny said quietly, going pale. They all howled and lunged toward her, even as Santa fought to reach her first. She shrieked in fright. "Darn it, Ginny!" he shouted in what almost sounded like irritation. "I told you not to do anything!" "You said not to use the stupid nerf gun!" she shot back as she dodged wildly and began to run around, evading her pursuers. "I meant don't do anything to get yourself noticed!" he growled as he bulldogged one man's head into the floor. He sprang to his feet and grabbed another man by the back of the head, ramming his face into the stone wall, creating a small crater from which the body slumped only slowly and wetly. "How the hell did they not notice the mostly naked girl in the room?" she yelled, sprinting around the circumference of the room, being chased by yellow-eyed foes. "They're mostly quantum, they don't always perceive real-state things or beings until they're interacted with!" he answered. "They weren't looking for you until you announced yourself!" "Oh, you and your weird physics shit!" she groused, her robe coming more and more undone as she ran. One of her tits was exposed, bouncing annoyingly and the nipple hardening as a cold wind from the endless holes in her walls and windows blew into the room. "Now what?" "Well, since they know you're here, you might as well use the gun," he answered as he tackled a small knot of them who were looking to cut off her avenue of escape. "At least then you can defend yourself if you're careful!" "The fuck am I supposed to do?" she shouted angrily as she clutched the ridiculous, useless gun. "Nerf them to death? Hope I shoot one foam dart down a throat and hope the bastard chokes and dies?" "Didn't you just let me inside all of your orifices?" he pointed out as he spun low, sweeping one foe's feet from under him and then taking him by the ankles to slam him off the floor. "Trust me, Virginia!" "Dammit!" she spat, steeling her nerve, hoping her resolve was harder than her nipple currently was. Taking a deep breath, she stopped running and spun, pointing the gun and pulling the plastic trigger; She yelped in astonishment as coruscating arcs of lightning crackled and lashed out from the muzzle, enveloping several foes, who wailed in glowing agony before disappearing from view. "Jesus H Fucking Tesla!" she exclaimed in amazement as she gaped down at her toy. "Virginia, language!" Santa warned. She rolled her eyes and pointed at another man rushing her, pulling the trigger and watching him explode in a shower of scintillating particles. "This shit will fuck you up!" blared the speakers. The wall splintered next to Ginny and several terrifying creatures barged in, causing her to shriek in fright, they were easily Santa's size, vaguely humanoid but covered in a greyish, segmented carapace, with insectoid heads, evil-looking mandibles and huge claws at the end of four arms. They hissed as the lunged for her. "Fuck fuck fuck!" cried out as she began running. "Fucking hate motherfucking bugs!" She fired wildly behind herself without looking, managing to strike one of the new creatures but only slowing it down. Ginny raced for the stairs, stampeding up them only to find more of the yellow-eyed humanoids waiting for her. "Santa!" she cried out in terror. "Help!" He glanced her way and grimaced at her predicament. "Aw, hell;" With a strength born of the desperation to protect one of his precious children, he surged forward, shoulder-blocking his way through a knot of assailants, springing through the air with astonishing agility, alternately using the wall and railing of the stairs to get to the upper floor, twisting and executing a flying kick that downed a foe about to attack Ginny. "Good thing I wore my enhanced parkour boots tonight, eh?" he muttered as he glared at the foes crowding to get up the stairs or down the hallway at them. "I don't even know what that means." Ginny snapped, backing up warily as the horde coming for them grew in numbers. "If that's some sort of geek speak, then we, are you getting bigger?" "I guess I am," he replied, grimly, glaring at their foes. "I don't expect what I'm saying to make sense, but the other iterations of me, my other selves, they're all coming here, merging with me to help meet the threat." "You're; consolidating?" she asked in disbelief. "That's one way to look at it," he said, his blue eyes flashing. "It's gonna make finishing the Christmas run tight if I get held up here much longer." "Oh, terribly sorry if I'm inconveniencing you, your highness." Ginny said, trying to not sound too snide. He put his body between her and her foes, backing her up against the wall. "They can't come through the wall you're up against, it's the South wall," he said quietly but with a sense of urgency. "You're safe from that angle. You can fire your gun past me or over the rail at the guys down below. Since they're trying to reach you that means they've solidified enough that they can't do crazy things like jump seven meters up to reach you, they'll have to use the stairs." "I thought they were after you." Ginny said hotly. "They were, until you announced yourself with a jug of nog," he pointed out. "Now they want to destroy you to hurt me." "Oh. Sorry." Ginny mumbled somewhat sheepishly. "You can make it up to me later!" he said as he surged forward suddenly, bulling his way through the approaching crowd, clotheslining several at once. Shouts went up and the fight was on again. Santa punched, kicked, elbowed, kneed and wrenched his way through the enemy horde. Ginny swore he was indeed bigger than he had been earlier. His already hard body physique was almost bulging with muscles now, like a California beach bodybuilder. Black blood glistened on his flawless skin as he maimed the attackers. Droplets that hit the carpet sizzled and ate through it, burning the hardwood floor beneath. "No!" Ginny wailed in despair. "Not the hardwood! I loved that feature!" She glared and gritted her teeth as she leaned over the railing and pointed the nerf gun down at the endless crowd on the main floor, pulling the trigger. The crackling arcs of energy enveloped several foes, who wailed and vanished. Same as before, the giant insectoids rarely disappeared but seemed slowed or staggered by the attack. Santa fought his way forward, forcing the attackers back from Ginny. Try as they might, no one got by him, even if it meant that they could strike at him instead. He took their assaults resolutely, using his body as a shield to protect her. Before long, the floor of the hallway was littered with bodies, some barely stirring, others not moving at all. Still, the foes swarmed up the stairs. One of the bug-things swiped at him with its vicious claws and he ducked under the blow before kicking his boot into one of the reverse-jointed legs, snapping it. The bug screeched and tumbled and he leapt onto its back, grabbing hold of one of the large, wet-grey chitinous plates that armored its back and pulled, it tore away with a mushy crack and the beast's keened agony as it shuddered and thrashed. Without pausing, Santa whirled around and slammed the exoskeletal plate across several men's heads, dropping them. Ginny kept firing the nerf tesla gun, wondering what sort of sociopath would invent a deadly weapon that looked like a famous kid's toy. She pushed it from her mind, realizing that she wanted to live and didn't care at the moment about the social mores of the issue. Santa was using the huge chitin plate almost like a shield, driving his foes back with it to the stairs. It finally cracked in half and he punched through the mess, unwilling to give the enemy time to regroup. He spun one man around with a fist across the jaw before grabbing his arms from behind and ramming his knee into the man's back, lifting him off the floor and letting him slam his spine onto the stairs. Without waiting, Santa launched himself through the air, knee raised and smashed it into the face of a man on the stair's corner landing. The foe's head went back through the wall with a loud crunch and he hung there limply, no longer part of the battle. "Ack!" Ginny squawked as the nerf gun sputtered and let out several impotent flashes and then died. "Not now! No no no!" One foe had broken through the cordon and now raced toward her. She yelled loudly and smashed the butt of her nerf gun into his face, staggering him for a moment. She glared at him angrily, waiting for him to fall, but her didn't, so she kicked him in the crotch with her instep. He groaned and sunk to his knees, holding himself. Ginny was practically jumping up and down on top of him by the time he stopped moving. "Stay; the; fuck; down!" she shouted angrily as she turned his ribcage into powder. She failed to notice the one last foe who rushed up behind her. But then Santa was at her side and he delivered a devastating haymaker to the man's thorax. Stunned, the intruder staggered back against the railing. With a growl, Santa grabbed him by the face and ruthlessly bent his back over the railing before leaping over and slamming his elbow across the man's neck as he went down to the main floor. The lifeless form crumpled next to him as he looked around, glaring. No foes remained standing. Aside from the music, all was quiet. "It is safe?" Ginny called from the gallery. "Are the scary guys and bug-thingies all gone?" "No," Santa said warily. "And the next wave is even bigger." "Great!" Ginny complained, tossing the useless nerf gun over the side. "And according to you, there's no one that can help us!" "I didn't say that," he countered, beckoning for her to come down the stairs and be near him for protection. "I just said there was no Easter Bunny." "No Superman either, apparently," she grumbled as she approached him, letting him put a huge arm around her possessively. He was, indeed, bigger than ever. She was practically child-sized next to him now. "So who the hell is there to help us?" "If help's arriving it had better get here soon," he said, taking her to the remains of her big glass bay windows and back door. The wind was howling as snow drove into the living room. What was left of it, anyway. Which was nothing. "It's now or never. Can you see them?" She peered into the darkness outside and a chill ran down her spine, hundreds of red and yellow glowing eyes could be seen in the darkness. And they seemed to be getting closer. "Do; do they see me?" she asked, swallowing nervously. "I'm sure they do," he said, grimacing. "Not going to take a chance and assume they don't. I'll do everything I can to protect you, of course." "Is; is that going to be enough?" She could hear the angry hisses and an evil chanting outside clearly now, getting closer with each moment. It pained Santa that he couldn't lie to her. "I don't know, Virginia." She sighed and smiled weakly. "Well, at least I know there's a Santa Claus now. And he gave me the night of my life before it all ended." He returned the smile, trying to feign a cheerfulness he didn't feel. "I don't;" Ginny faltered, trying to find the words. "I don't suppose that you'd; well; that you'd be willing to kiss me one last time? You know, before the end?" He turned to look down at her, his hands holding her arms with an unreal gentleness and a warmth in his eyes that comforted her even now. "Nothing would make me happier, Virginia." She smiled and closed her eyes. "Merry Christmas, Santa." "Merry Christmas, Virginia;" he said softly as he leaned down to kiss her. Then the night was filled with high-pitched shrieks, a noise that made her eyes snap open. She'd heard noises like that before, once a long time ago in grade school. It sounds like the hissing passage of meteors above, and getting closer. Or what she imagined artillery sounded like when it was incoming, like in all those war movies. Santa's head turned and an almost evil grin crept over his face as he listened. "That's more like it!" he declared, standing tall and pointing at the blackness of the night. "Watch the sky, Virginia;" She looked up and noticed glittering points of light, dozens of them, seeming to get closer. The hissing shriek was indeed their approach and they seemed to be aimed right at them. She felt Santa's hand squeeze on her shoulder, almost in excitement. His blue eyes were blazing ferociously. Finally, what looked like dozens of giant icicles, each larger and longer than a semi, lanced out of the night sky and slammed into the earth around her house, shaking it as they buried their tips in the frozen ground and came to a stop. Several impaled the intruders as they came in, while others kicked up a covering spray of snow as the enemy stopped and looked around in confusion. Then doors or portals opened on the sides of the titan icicles and tall, lithe beings began leaping out of them, wearing weird, form-fitting armor and carrying space-age guns and swords or axes. Their armor and long hair was a riot of colors that was reflected by the snow and ice. Wild, ululating war cries pierced the air. And a savage, bloody battle began on her property. "Who the hell are they?" Ginny almost yelled in astonishment as she watched. They moved with inhuman grace and speed, the ones not wearing helmets revealing long, beautiful facial features that were often frightening because of the wrath they displayed. The helmets were all tall and peaked, showing fearsome designs and glowing eyes. Weird runes pulsed and throbbed with light all over their armor. Guns hissed and shrieked while swords hummed as they slew. "My elves," Santa said, clearly pleased and also eager to fight but not willing to leave her side yet. "They got my call and converged on my position." "Those are elves?" she exclaimed in amazement. "Aren't they cutesy little toy-shop people?" "Cute myth, but no, not these ones," he replied, watching as several elves wearing bone-white armor with feminine features raced past, throwing themselves into a knot of the hulking bugs. They screamed and the masks of their wild-maned helmets gave off vibrations that shook Ginny's teeth in her head as it melted their foes' faces off. "No, a lot of my elves are warriors, meant to help me fight Krampus. They keep Christmas safe with me." "What the hell are they wearing?" she asked in disbelief. How could this weird night get any weirder? Santa sighed. "Truth? They've been spending way too much time playing Warhammer 40k and they; appropriated armor, weapons and tactics from the Eldar faction. They're space elves." "Wow. Gay;" she muttered, shaking her head. "Well, they're certainly earning their keep tonight." He nodded. "Been a long time since Krampus moved against us this hard. Apparently he got bored and was feeling uppity. That or he just forgot what a good thrashing felt like." Ginny watched as three elves, clad in scary black armor and wearing helmets that looked like peaked skulls, marched relentlessly forward, firing little rockets from elaborate launchers they carried in their hands and on suspensor harnesses. The rockets punctured the bugs' chitin shells and exploded inside them, sending shards of exoskeleton and stinking goo in every direction. Ginny squeaked and hid behind Santa as some of the nasty effluence landed right where she'd been standing only a moment before. Beams of super-heated plasma and tiny, shuriken-like projectiles hissed and whizzed by them, the remains of her lovely house now the center of a battleground while the winter storm raged on. Warriors in green armor, carrying weapons that looked like a horrifying hybrid of sword and chainsaw, tore into a knot of foes, slicing them to bloody ribbons. As savage as the battle had been earlier, when it had just been her and Santa, she suddenly appreciated its relative civility. "They need my help," Santa said finally, cracking his knuckles, his expression grim. "We have to finish this off or Christmas won't come on time." "I thought you said there was plenty of time." Ginny protested, frowning up at him. "There was," he admitted. "But in order to defeat Krampus' minions, I summoned every single quantum iteration of myself back to here to help me fight. No one is delivering presents anywhere at the moment. I can't change real-time if I'm here in my entirety." He turned and looked at her. "Hopefully we're keeping them busy enough that they don't worry about you. Stay against the wall and work the music, will you?" "Manning the music station," she said, nodding, focusing on giving herself a task. "Music for Santa and his homicidal elves to kill by. Got it;" She watched as Santa leapt through the shattered remains of her bay doors into the howling storm and crashed into a knot of foes, savaging them. She watched in disbelief for some time, trying to figure out how Santa could kill anyone. I mean, even serial murderers got presents in prison, didn't they? Maybe they didn't, she had no way of knowing and chalked up thinking about this to what could only be described as the weirdest night of her life. She squealed and dodged out of the way as a body came flying through the doors and landed next to her. She scrambled over to the entertainment center and stood in front of it, trying to figure out what the hell she should play. "Okay;" she breathed, trying to focus. "Mass slaughter music; mass slaughter music;" What constituted mass slaughter music? Death metal? Panic At The Disco? Teletubbies music? She had no playlists, so she began cycling through the radio, hoping to find anything that might suffice. Oldies; Christmas music; hip-hop; trance; disco; "Son of a fuck," she muttered. "This is harder than it looks." She finally came across a station playing 'Jailhouse Rock' and decided that was good enough, she was sick of looking. She winced, trying to ignore another splintering crash as a body came through her wall. She hugged herself but then felt her robe. She frowned as she looked down at it, realizing it had been thoroughly shredded in the fight earlier. Those shuriken-thingies had been cutting it real close. Ginny grumbled as she pulled it off and threw it away, standing there completely naked, it hadn't been keeping her warm in its current condition and she was thoroughly beyond giving a shit at this point about who saw her naked. They were all too damn busy tearing one another apart anyway. And that sort of pissed her off. She was buck-naked and no one seemed to care. She'd shaved her cunt for this? "And I thought my night sucked before," she sighed to no one in particular. "Not getting my cunt pounded had been my biggest complaint before this hack!" She never saw the menacing shadow that had slipped up behind her. Santa picked one of his foes up overhead and hurled him into a cluster of foes, bowling them all over. He then punched another man as he tried to run by, knocking him off his feet and into his back. A quick stamp on his solar plexus made sure he stopped moving. The huge man thrust his fist in the air and shouted loudly. "Clear!" he thundered, indicating no other enemies surrounded him. His elves responded in kind, many of them gathering in a tight ring about him, weapons facing out as they sought to protect him. Hundreds of bodies lay strewn across the landscape, some burning from plasma blasts, other shredded and blown apart by rockets or sliced into bloody jerky. The storm seemed to be abating, no longer a blizzard so much as a stiff wind and swirls of snow. "Sire, we detect no enemies in the immediate vicinity," one elf wearing blue armor with a tall, crested helmet announced, striding up and saluting by thumping his gauntleted fist over his heart. "This attack has been defeated." "Maybe," Santa said, looking around warily. "But that doesn't mean anything just yet. We have to secure the area, make sure Virginia is alright and then get back to” "Kringle!" "Damn," he muttered to himself. "I thought this was too easy." He made several complex gestures, sending his elves fanning out in a wide arc as he began trudging forward through the snow, heading toward where the voice had come from out of the night. The winds and squalls of snow continued to die down until there was an almost deafening silence, the moon shining brightly overhead and revealing the sheer carnage of the battle that had been waged, the snow and ice glittered with frozen blood. "Kringle!" snarled the inhuman voice angrily. "I'm coming, I'm coming!" Santa said loudly, scowling. "Don't get your panties in a bunch!" He stopped in a clearing on the other side of the house, glowering at who confronted him, the beast was not as tall as he was, nor as muscular, but horrifying in aspect. The backward-jointed, hairy legs ended in wicked hooves. The skin not covered in coarse black fur was almost as dark and criss-crossed with innumerable scars. The vascular chest was crowned with a strong neck and sitting atop it was a blasphemous head, a demonic goat's visage from which grew four evil, twisting horns. The red eyes blazed like wrathful coals and sharp teeth glistened wetly inside the hateful mouth. Krampus. And in one of his powerful, clawed hands, he held Virginia by the neck, who looked like a rag doll. "Hi, Santa;" she said weakly, looking very apologetic. Santa kept walking forward, clenching his fists. "By all means, Kringle, keep coming forward if you mean to slay the child." Krampus growled, starting to squeeze and causing Ginny to shudder in fear. Santa stopped dead in his tracks, his eyes narrowing. His elves had now cast a tight net around the scene, hemming in Krampus. One circle of warriors faced inward, pointing their weapons at the abomination while another behind them faced out, prepared for any further attacks. Santa didn't move. "Let the girl go, Krampus," he said levelly. "This doesn't concern her." "Oh, I beg to differ," said the beastman in an almost non-chalant tone. "It's always about the children, isn't it?" "Hey!" said Ginny angrily. "I am not a child, jerk! I'm twenty, Gurr!" "Oh, do stop talking, you're such an annoyance." Krampus said, giving her neck another warning squeeze. "Let the adults work this out." "There's nothing to work out, Krampus," Santa growled, his blue eyes flashing. "You'll let the girl go." "I think we both know that's not happening," intoned the vile intruder. "She is my victory over you, and you know it. Revenge is not only a dish best served cold but often. And not often enough for me." "About this cold revenge dish thing," Ginny said, squirming slightly. "Couldn't; couldn't I just find you a nice tin can to chew on instead?" "Shut up, girl!" Krampus said harshly while several elves could be heard to chuckle and even Santa smirked at her jest. "I hold your life in my hands, to dispose of as I please." His foul breath crackled in the cold night air. His touch was uncomfortably warm, almost hot and strangely kept her body from freezing in the winter night. His touch felt evil and her skin crawled in revulsion. His strength was terrifying. "It wasn't enough that I slaved in coal mines for you, giving you carbon lumps to deliver to naughty children," Krampus growled, glaring at Santa. "It wasn't enough that I found the worst of them and brought them to you in the night so you could lecture them." "Hey, nobody asked you or ordered you to do the coal thing, pal," Santa said angrily. "And the whole kidnapping kids thing was your idea. I decided to let you have some creative control and look what happened. When it didn't work out, you decided that beating naughty kids with reeds was the answer. You're damn right that wasn't good enough!" "Silence!" Krampus snarled loudly, stamping one of his clawed hooves and making the ground shake dangerously. "Your kind-hearted foolishness with these puny mortals changed nothing about their behavior! Your failure to recognize their inherent selfishness was why our efforts were doomed!" "These puny mortals?" Santa countered. "You used to be one of them, Pete, remember? You were a well-behaved boy once." "Shut up!" growled Krampus. "Well-behaved, but not good," Santa continued. "You followed the rules and wanted everyone to follow rules. You were a control freak. I brought you north to show you what kindness could do, but you hated the cheer and the happiness and you fled to the coal mines in Greenland, hiding in the dark where the light of Christmas couldn't touch you! And when making kids feel bad with coal didn't bring them into line, you started the whole whipping them with reeds thing. Good job there, Pete!" "I'm warning you, Kringle;" Krampus said dangerously. "Oh, he really gets your goat, doesn't he?" Ginny sneered, causing several elves to laugh loudly. Krampus now snarled furiously and lifted her into the air by her neck, causing her to cry out in pain. Santa watched warily, knowing better than to make a move. "We seem to have an impasse," Krampus said, an evil smile playing over his slavering mouth. "You cannot harm me, because you know I can slay the child, but I cannot as yet slay her because she is my bargaining chip. But my need to hurt you, old man, is so very strong." He lowered Ginny down until her feet were just touching the snow-covered ground. She frowned as she heard a wet slithering sound she could not identify. "And there are other ways to hurt you than slaying the poor dear, aren't there?" Ginny felt something slimy touch her leg and then start to crawl up it, wrapping around her smooth skin. She shuddered and squirmed in horror as she realized exactly what was happening. The snake-like appendage wound up her thigh and then behind her. She gasped as it slid between her ass cheeks and then underneath to her cunt. She felt the blunt head split her lips and then move upward again. "Don't do this, Krampus." Santa said, trying to figure out what to do without hurting Ginny. "And why not?" replied the qliphotic abomination. "Don't you have a present for me? Then I guess I'll have to give myself one." Krampus' organ continued to slither its way around her body, leaving a glistening trail on her skin. She stiffened and moaned as his appendage wrapped around her tits, squeezing them, the head pausing and teasing the nipples. "Hey, asshole, dinner and a movie first!" she spat angrily. Ginny was about to say something else when the large, grayish cockhead snaked up in front of her face and then plunged into her mouth, causing her to gag and go silent. Her eyes widened and she thrashed furiously, but to no avail. He was simply too strong. "Language, young lady." Krampus chided, still staring at Santa. "Hasn't Santa taught you anything?" "This isn't gonna end well for you, Pete." Santa said, his tone dire. "Christmas never does, Kringle," replied the demon, his cock sliding in and out of Ginny's mouth. "I'm just hoping to make the holiday every bit as awful and intolerable for you as it is for me. After all, misery loves company." He brought her body close to his head and his other hand reached over and stroked her cunt lips, which were glistening. He leered at his foe, knowing Santa was helpless to get closer. "Is she good down here?" Krampus said mockingly. "Nice and wet and tight for you? Was she the best one ever, in the endless list of good girls you have fucked?" Santa said nothing, just glaring at Krampus. His knuckles were white as he clenched his fists. "Sharing your toys is the spirit of Christmas, isn't it?" Krampus said evilly, finally pulling his cock out of her mouth. Ginny coughed and sputtered, tendrils of resinous spittle and worse trailing away from her lips. She glared at Krampus but was still immobilized. "Just get this over with and fuck me already, whip-cock," she spat. "You won't be my first egotistical disappointment, trust me." Krampus' eyes blazed red and his tongue sped around her naked form blindingly quickly while he released her from his clawed grip. The tongue wrapped and immobilized her arms, holding them out straight while still encircling her tits. It then snaked around her waist and legs, pinning those as well while his long cock, swaying about like a cobra, came to a stop in front of her swollen cunt lips. The head teased and tapped against the opening, causing her to moan and squirm. "As you wish, child;" The head forced itself through her lips, sliding deep inside her. Ginny cried out in a mixture of shock and indescribable pleasure. She felt the tip of his pointed tongue probe trailing around her nipples. The python-like length of his cock churned inside her cunt. The blinding light behind her eyes finally receded and she lifted her head, looking out into the night, feeling his tongue constricting around her neck. She could dimly see a huge being in red pants and black boots watching nearby, his powerful chest exposed. The startling blue eyes flashed in the darkness of the night. She could tell he wanted to rescue her but didn't dare come closer. She gasped and shuddered as Krampus' cock pushed still deeper inside her. She felt fuller than she had imagined possible, the slithering appendage stretching her wide. The sticky, squelching noises were hardly to be believed. "Ew, gross! Hentai noises!" she thought in revulsion. "Krampus;" Santa warned. His elves all pointed their weapons menacingly but he held up his hand, staying them. "The child is naughty," Krampus said, smiling through pointed teeth. "Very naughty. Such a sordid past." "Hey, back off, she was young and needed the money!" Santa snapped defensively. "That thing with the midget and the donkey was” "You're not helping here!" Ginny shouted, blushing furiously, even as Krampus violated her. "Wicked child," growled the vile demon, shoving his cock in and out of her, the peristaltic actions of its length causing her to writhe and squirm in his grip, her breath coming in ragged gasps. "Shameless. Even though I violate her, she finds a way to be concerned about how you perceive her. I find it; titillating." "Oh, do I make you horny?" she sneered, turning her head to smirk at him. "Couldn't tell, looking at that head of yours." "Silence!" Krampus hissed, spittle flying from his jaws, his eyes flashing angrily. "I hold your life and death in my hands." "How would I know?" she shot back. "Hope you're better with your hands than you are with your cock, Billy G." He plunged his cock deeper still inside her. She went rigid and cried out. "That all you got?" she rasped, trying not to faint as she felt popping inside her hips while he stetched her. "My brother got in deeper than that when we were little!" "Insolent!" Krampus snarled savagely, bouncing her up and down and he fucked her harder than ever, pulling on her arms and legs, stretching her joints til they creaked. She felt a deep, wet heat building inside her and in spite of the horror she consciously felt about the situation, even more dire was her need to cum. She felt her cunt squeezing around his cock. His snake-like tongue probed her ass and wriggled inside, further adding to her desperation. "Intholent bith, you will be punithed!" "What was that?" Santa asked, turning his head slightly and putting his hand to his ear. "I couldn't understand you, it's like you have a lisp or something." "Don't mock meef!" Krampus said angrily, his tongue whipping out of Ginny's ass, causing her to yelp suddenly. "I'll kill her, Kringle!" "Not before I cum, damn you!" Ginny panted, her body flushed and covered in sweat as she twisted and writhed in his grip. "Uh, so close, goddammit!" "Language!" Santa and Krampus both snapped at her. "Aw, c'mon!" she wailed. "You two are total pains in the ass! Do it, Billy! Show me what a bad boy you are!" Krampus glared at her and began fucking her harder than ever. "As you wish, child!" "Krampus!" Santa shouted, reaching out his hand in alarm. "Don't!" Krampus grinned evilly at Santa, his teeth clenching as he drew close to climax. His cock seemed to swell along its length, stretching her wider still. She threw her head back and gritted her teeth, straining as she was overwhelmed by sensation; Santa's fist slammed across Krampus' jaw with a powerful crack. The demonoid's eyes rolled into his head and he crumpled to the ground. Ginny wailed in frustration as his cock pulled out of her and retreated back to his body, like a wet, slimy Stanley tape measure. She collapsed to her hands and knees in the snow, panting and shaking, her eyes wide. Santa raced up and knelt next to her, his eyes shining with concern. "Fuck;" Ginny whispered, gasping for air. "Motherfucker;" She looked up at her rescuer now, her eyes flashing accusingly. "The hell? Couldn't you have let him make me cum first?" Santa paused. "What?" "I was so damn close!" she hissed, standing up and stamping her foot. "I was within half a second of the orgasm of my life and you had to choose that moment to intervene and play the hero! Don't expect a thank you card!" "Uh, Virginia," Santa said, rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly, trying to figure out what to say. "If he had brought you to orgasm, it would have killed you. When Krampus climaxes, his appendage you were so attached to bursts into spikes, basically killing you from the inside while denying you your orgasm." She paused and then deflated. "Holy cobra dildos. What a bastard." Ginny then pointed a finger at her savior. "But you still owe me an orgasm, then, pal. You may have rescued me from certain death, but that doesn't mean I don't need relief." Santa looked really confused. "What, here? Now?" "Damn straight," she said firmly, suddenly remembering she was buck naked in a snow-storm. In spite of the no-doubt freezing weather, her body was still warm and very wet with need. She put her hand down her cunt and felt around for a moment before presenting her sticky palm and fingers to Santa for inspection. "Do I look satisfied to you? You've already fucked me, Screamo the Goat Boy just fucked me, who cares if your freaky gay elves watch us? I need satisfaction now and I already am aware that you can't say no." Santa sighed. "It's gotta be quick, Virginia. I'm really behind, now that I'm completely temporal in one location." "Whatever, just get me to the promised land, man." Ginny replied, shrugging. "Who knows, maybe your entourage might enjoy a show." "Oh, right, about that," Santa said, standing up tall and shouting loudly. "About; Face!" As a single unit, the elves all turned around smartly on their heels, still arranged in a protective ring around their liege and his companion, weapons ready as they scanned the darkness for trouble, their eyes glowing menacingly inside their helmets. Santa strode up to Ginny, towering over her and ignoring the prostrate form of the still-unconscious Krampus, snuffling nearby. She smiled up at him, somehow warmed by his presence, in spite of the icy night she should have frozen to death in already. He pulled her into his arms and kissed her deeply. She moaned into his mouth as she felt her already molten core getting even more heated in response to his touch. Tongues tangled and played as he took her ass cheeks in his hands and squeezed them, making her shiver. Ginny's hands fumbled with his large black belt until it fell away and then pulled down his red pants. He pulled her onto his powerful thighs, resting her on them. She hooked her legs behind his waist and began grinding her wet, eager cunt against his hardening cock, which swelled readily. Her head was almost spinning, she was so horny. "Hmm, give it to me, baby," she purred, feeling the head of his cock touch her cunt lips. "Make me cum hard and fast." She sighed loudly as he pulled her close, penetrating and sliding deep inside her. Ginny moaned shamelessly as Santa once again began to pump back and forth inside her. His huge cock stretched her cunt wide, but not in the violent, violating way Krampus did. This felt warm and utterly perfect. She nipped at the skin of his chest while he moved in and out of her. "Yes," Ginny breathed as he began to moved faster, pumping strongly and rhythmically. She could feel her wetness trickling down between her cheeks, her cunt clutching at him hungrily, greedily and unwilling to let go until it was somehow sated. "Oh, God, just what I needed. Yes, fuck me, Santa!" He gripped her tight and thrust into her, picking up his pace just the way she wanted. She was gasping and yelping now and he squeezed her cheeks, one of his fingers poking inside her puckered knot. She clenched her teeth and groaned at the intrusion, murmuring that she loved it. She grew warmer and warmer, her body tingling with an exquisite fire that rippled out from her core. Santa turned her around and set her feet on top of his boots, bending her forward and pulling on her arms. She cried out as he fucked her harder, his hips thumping against her ass cheeks. Her hands clenched wildly, her breath coming in gasps as his overwhelming strength dominated her. "Oh, God!" she panted, beginning to shudder uncontrollably, almost drooling. "Uh, cum in me, dammit! Fucking cum in me!" Santa pulled on her arms even tighter as his thighs slammed into her. Ginny strained, craning her neck, teeth clenched as she tried not to scream, but it was no use, she wailed loudly as he came inside her, filling her once again in a way she could not describe. Her orgasm shook every last atom of her being, transporting her to a world of nothing but pleasure, edged with mint. She buckled, hanging loosely in his arms, exhausted. She'd been fucked hard at least five times tonight and had a dreadful suspicion that this experience would only make her libido even more hyperactive. She sighed as Santa scooped her naked form into his arms and cuddled her against the cold. Ginny purred and traced a fingernail across his broad chest. "Thank you," she said quietly. "Just what the doctor ordered. That quenched the flames, for now." He finally put her down and she looked at the remains of her ruined chateau, which was completely leveled and now on fire. "Poor Oatmeal," she murmured. "Where am I going to live?" She scowled down at the still supine Krampus, anger flaring in her. "It's this jack wagon’s fault. You should totally napalm his face." Santa looked down at her in shock. "Did you just say I should jerk off in Krampus' face?" "Damn right, he'd deserve it too." Ginny announced. "That and shove your sleigh up his ass." "I am not jizzing in Krampus' face." Santa said, clearly repulsed by the suggestion. "Fine, leave a woman to do a man's job," Ginny said testily, striding over to Krampus and putting one leg on either side of his head. She stuck three fingers inside her cunt and managed to tease out considerable amounts of Santa's minty cum, which she smeared all over Krampus' face and into his fur with glee, even giving him a glistening white moustache. "Take that, asshole!" She looked like she might have been done desecrating the unconscious form, but then she paused and squatted over him, peeing on his body and face, the stream steaming in the cold night air. She grinned evilly as she thoroughly baptized him. "Teach you to mess with me." Ginny muttered as she walked back to Santa, nodding. The huge man had a wide smirk on his face and shook his head slowly. "I can't believe you just pissed all over Krampus," he said, hugging her to him. "However, you're going to freeze to death at this rate;" He held out his hand and one of his elves dutifully brought him a large, velvety red cloak, which he wrapped around her. She blushed and smiled gratefully at his consideration, but only until he slid it off her, revealing that she was now wearing some ridiculous 'Hot Christmas Elf' outfit, complete with striped stockings and high heels. She looked like a Yule whore. "Seriously?" she asked, unimpressed. "This is your solution to my naked issues?" He shrugged. "I liked you better naked, but you would freeze quickly." "Whatever," she sighed, looking down and appreciating the considerable lift it gave her cleavage. It was incredibly warm, in spite of how scant it was. "So now what? I still have no damn home, you and Goatse here blew it up with your little barnyard brawl." Santa looked around warily. "That might be the least of your worries. The wind's picking up again, which means that another assault is coming. We need to get out of here." "Sire!" said one of the armored elves, thumping his fist to his breastplate and bowing his head. "We will cover you. You must go while you still have a head-start and the dark one is unconscious." Santa nodded. "Yeah, he's not gonna be happy when he wakes up and he's really gonna want revenge on you, Virginia." She felt her mouth go dry at the notion of another battle and Krampus waking up to even the score. "So; now what?" Santa shrugged. "I'd say it's fairly obvious. I've still got to make my rounds before the night is over and I'm not leaving you here;" She gaped as he put his hands on her shoulders and looked down into her eyes. "Virginia, you're coming with me and you're going to help save Christmas." Chapter 3, Christmas Wishes "How the hell do you drive this thing?" Ginny called in a panic, her eyes wide as she held onto the reigns, twisting them wildly as she tried to steer. Up ahead of her, eight large reindeer squealed and thrashed their heads. The sleigh corkscrewed while it hurtled through the cold night air, the moon shining down on them. "Well, first of all, stop panicking," Santa replied as he stood on the back of the sleigh, atop his huge red sack of toys. He was more or less back to his original size she had become accustomed to, now that he had sent his other 'iterations' of himself out over the globe to deliver presents. "That would be an excellent start." "Easy for you to say," she snapped, scowling back at him for a moment since taking her eyes off her designated path seemed to make no difference to how she was doing at navigating. "You're used to doing this!" "Trust me, between the two of us, you're the one with the easy job right now and I'd be happy to trade," he called back as he ducked wildly. A comically large rocket thundered by, with an evil-looking man strapped to the bottom of it, swinging a weapon wildly to hit Santa. "Try to keep her steady!" "While dodging psychos on rockets, no problem!" she grumbled, trying to ignore the howling wind and roaring projectiles. "Have I mentioned Krampus is a gigantic asshole?" "Repeatedly," Santa answered, watching warily. The sky was threaded with jets of fire as their enemies kept coming about in ponderous, elliptical arcs and heading back towards them, intent on their destruction. They had only just pulled off from the smoldering remains of Ginny's country chateau when the assault began. Krampus was nowhere to be seen, but his minions were clearly determined to avenge him. "Maybe urinating on him wasn't such a good idea. He never did take humiliation well." Ginny squawked in alarm and ducked as a rocket streaked right at her. Santa jumped in the air, doing the splits to avoid the projectile and landing back on top of his present sack. Another tried to pull up alongside them but Santa grabbed the harness the man was wearing and wrenched the rocket off course, sending it speeding into one some distance away. Both rockets (and presumably their pilots) exploded in a violent orgy of noise and flashing lights. "Really hope people just think those are fireworks," Santa muttered as he looked glared balefully at yet another rocket considering approaching. "Fireworks right in the middle of the world's most spastic meteor shower. Sure, they'll buy that;" "Funny part is I can't tell if you're serious," Ginny said loudly. "If they don't believe that narrative, then they've gotta accept that Santa Claus was engaged in an epic air battle over their town with quantum men strapped to rockets." "Truth is often stranger than fiction," Santa agreed, nodding. "Fighting these jerks off is taking too much time!" "Well, don't you have anything in your back of tricks there?" Ginny asked. In spite of the sleigh being open, it seemed to have some weird form of climate control and she'd been getting rather warm. To that end she'd pulled down her top, exposing her tits to cool herself off. The breeze allowed through made her nipples tingle delightfully, but not enough to distract her from driving the sleigh. After all, she often drove ninety minutes to her job wearing a vibrating insert in her panties, so she knew for a fact she could orgasm and still control a vehicle. A wheeled one, at least. She wasn't so sure about a sleigh doing Mach Three at twenty thousand feet. "You mean a weapon?" Santa asked. "In the bag full of toys for kids?" "You gave me a nerf gun out of that bag and it turned out to be some sort of doomsday device, didn't it?" she pointed out. "Scary lightning bolts everywhere. I refuse to believe you don't have some other goodies in there." Santa shrugged and squatted down to look inside the bag, getting narrowly missed by another rocket that shot over his head. The pilot cursed and came around again, aiming directly at the chassis of the sleigh from the side. Ginny's eyes widened in fright as she saw him approach. She jerked the reins to one side and the sleigh tilted ninety degrees, presenting its wide, flat red underside. The rocket slammed into it and exploded. Whatever it was made of or whatever shielding was in place, Ginny only heard the detonation and felt a rumble, but there was no damage aside from that. "Ha!" Santa said, standing tall and holding an electric guitar in the air, its black body gleamed in the moonlight. He put the strap around his neck and took several seconds to tune it, ignoring the aerial mayhem that swirled around him. "The hell are you going to do with that?" Ginny asked, scowling as she looked behind to see what he was up to. "You said to find something, I found something," he said simply as he checked the pickups. "Now let's see what we can do here;" He took the pick in hand and strummed it across the strings, a screeching pulse of sound blared out from the instrument, heading in all directions. It struck several rockets nearby, which exploded brightly. Other were knocked off course, spiraling around crazily as they fought for control. Santa laughed loudly, apparently enjoying himself. "Quit laughing and kill, red man!" Ginny yelled, nonplussed by his amusement. "I want to survive the night and I've had several close calls with death already!" "I'm working on it, Virginia, patience." Santa chided, adjusting the tuners momentarily. "Near-death experiences make you cranky." "No shit, Sherlock," she grumbled as he blasted out another screeching wave of sound. "Do you plan to play anything or just keep shrieking out that one sound?" "As you wish," he said cheerfully, pleased to be doing as she asked. Making her happy was all he cared about. He began playing a heavy metal version of Wagner's 'Ride of the Valkyries', the pulsing walls of sound thundering out and striking every foe within hundreds of

Bienvenidos a otro podcast sobre historias cortas de Warhammer 40k en Terraescribiente. En esta ocasión tenemos una historia corta en Terraescribiente. "LUCHAR HUYENDO" Maquetación: MAC (Terraescribiente) Por favor, sigue y suscríbete a las siguientes redes: DISCORD: https://discord.gg/WnbP8tQtD3 Canal de WhatsApp: https://whatsapp.com/channel/0029VaCcO2s1NCrQqLpfFR3u Escucha el audiolibro completo en: patreon.com/Terraescribiente Twitter: https://twitter.com/TerraEscriba Telegram: https://t.me/+62_TRJVg-3cxNDZh Instagram: www.instagram.com/terraescribiente/ TikTok: www.tiktok.com/@terraescribiente YouTube: www.youtube.com/@Terraescribiente ¡También suscríbete a TERRAESCRIBIENTE en ITUNES Y SPOTIFY! ¡Dale me gusta a cada podcast y coméntalos! ¡Ayuda mucho! ¡Gracias!

Agradece a este podcast tantas horas de entretenimiento y disfruta de episodios exclusivos como éste. ¡Apóyale en iVoox! Bienvenidos a otro podcast sobre historias cortas de Warhammer 40k en Terraescribiente. En esta ocasión comenzamos con la saga de Ciaphas Cain: "LUCHAR O HUIR" Escrito por: Sandy Miller. Maquetación: MAC (Terraescribiente) Por favor, sigue y suscríbete a las siguientes redes: DISCORD: https://discord.gg/WnbP8tQtD3 Canal de WhatsApp: https://whatsapp.com/channel/0029VaCcO2s1NCrQqLpfFR3u Escucha el audiolibro completo en: patreon.com/Terraescribiente Twitter: https://twitter.com/TerraEscriba Telegram: https://t.me/+62_TRJVg-3cxNDZh Instagram: www.instagram.com/terraescribiente/ TikTok: www.tiktok.com/@terraescribiente YouTube: www.youtube.com/@Terraescribiente ¡También suscríbete a TERRAESCRIBIENTE en ITUNES Y SPOTIFY! ¡Dale me gusta a cada podcast y coméntalos! ¡Ayuda mucho! ¡Gracias!Escucha este episodio completo y accede a todo el contenido exclusivo de TERRAESCRIBIENTE. Descubre antes que nadie los nuevos episodios, y participa en la comunidad exclusiva de oyentes en https://go.ivoox.com/sq/747547

Agradece a este podcast tantas horas de entretenimiento y disfruta de episodios exclusivos como éste. ¡Apóyale en iVoox! Bienvenidos a otro podcast sobre historias cortas de Warhammer 40k en Terraescribiente. En esta ocasión continuamos con la saga de Ciaphas Cain: "LA SEDUCCIÓN" Escrito por: Sandy Miller. Maquetación: MAC (Terraescribiente) Por favor, sigue y suscríbete a las siguientes redes: DISCORD: https://discord.gg/WnbP8tQtD3 Canal de WhatsApp: https://whatsapp.com/channel/0029VaCcO2s1NCrQqLpfFR3u Escucha el audiolibro completo en: patreon.com/Terraescribiente Twitter: https://twitter.com/TerraEscriba Telegram: https://t.me/+62_TRJVg-3cxNDZh Instagram: www.instagram.com/terraescribiente/ TikTok: www.tiktok.com/@terraescribiente YouTube: www.youtube.com/@Terraescribiente ¡También suscríbete a TERRAESCRIBIENTE en ITUNES Y SPOTIFY! ¡Dale me gusta a cada podcast y coméntalos! ¡Ayuda mucho! ¡Gracias!Escucha este episodio completo y accede a todo el contenido exclusivo de TERRAESCRIBIENTE. Descubre antes que nadie los nuevos episodios, y participa en la comunidad exclusiva de oyentes en https://go.ivoox.com/sq/747547

Miracle On Route 34: Part 2 Virginia and Santa face extreme danger together. Based on a post by BiscuitHammer, in 3 parts. Listen to the Podcast at Steamy Stories. Someone attacked Santa with a wicked-looking spiked hand-axe, something out of a sci-fi movie. He batted the weapon aside and clapped his open hands across the man's ears, busting his brain. Before he dropped, Santa grabbed the corpse and swung it around in a wide arc, smashing it into the foes surrounding him and knocking them back. "Shit!" Ginny squealed as one of the targets landed near her. "It's like the fucking Matrix in here!" As he threw the corpse away, he paused very briefly and glanced at her. "Since you happen to be right there, how about a little mood music?" "What?" "I'm just saying some music would be nice if we're going to be doing this," he called. "You're next to the entertainment system, how about putting something on?" "You’re shitting me, right?" she almost complained, wincing as she heard something delicate-sounding and expensive smash behind her amidst the wild brawl. She stared at the multimedia system, flapping her arms in frustration as she tried to focus through the noise. This couldn't be happening. She clutched the sleeves of her plush robe for a moment, trying to concentrate on its soft, fuzzy texture and center herself. She'd almost forgotten the large nerf gun in her hands but ignored it now, fixing her gaze on the mp3 playlist. She pressed a button. "Silent night; Holy night;" Bing crooned through the room. "Not really what I had in mind!" Santa mentioned loudly as he rammed his knee into a man's chin. "Try again!" Ginny bit her lip and pressed the button again, this time rewarded with Gary Glitter singing 'Another Rock And Roll Christmas'. "Still not quite there," he said as he snapmared another foe. "Better, but not quite!" "Well I don't know!" she shouted in exasperation. "What kind of music do you put on while Santa kills things in your living room?" Santa turned sideways and thrust his foot out, kicking an intruder in the chest and sending him sprawling backwards, rolling head over heels until he thumped into the entertainment system, jolting it and skipping the player. "I am a bitch. How do you want me? From behind, or on my knees? I am a slut, please hold me down, I'll be your noise, This shit will fuck you up!" "Perfect!" he declared as he fought, swarmed once again by foes. "Seriously?" Ginny yelled. "Combichrist is Santa's fucking fighting groove?" "I'm trying to figure out why you have it on your playlist," Santa replied. "I don't remember you liking aggrotech!" "Why the hell do you of all people even know what it is?" she shot back, wincing as she watched another body sail into the opposite wall with a sickening crunch before dropping to the floor and leaving a huge, crumbling dent in the stone. 'This Shit Will Fuck You Up!' "I prefer the term 'Hellektro' myself," he added. "And I know all songs, silly. I remember when the Dayglo Abortions wrote that 'Hey Santa!' song back in the '80's, they didn't get presents for” "I didn't ask, why are you answering?" she hissed. "Kill! Kill!" All the while, the pounding rhythms of the music filled the room. "I am a bitch. How do you want me? From behind, or on my knees? I am a slut, please hold me down, I'll be your noise, This shit will fuck you up!" "Well, at least we know why it's on your playlist, anyway!" he mentioned as he broke someone's back over his knee. "Very funny, red man!" Ginny hissed, scowling. She ducked wildly as another assailant flew overhead and landed in the Jacuzzi, his neck slamming against the hard edge with a snap noise and then tilting at a strange angle, his eyes wide and unseeing. "Fucking hell," she muttered. "These guys eat too much red meat!" Santa smashed two heads together before punting a third man in the chest, sending him staggering back until he fell against the entertainment unit, right next to Ginny, his eyes spiraling in his head. She scowled down at him for a moment before smashing the pitcher of nog on his cranium and sending him to the floor. Every single intruder stopped and turned to look at her suddenly, their eyes narrowing and turning very yellow. "Eep;" Ginny said quietly, going pale. They all howled and lunged toward her, even as Santa fought to reach her first. She shrieked in fright. "Darn it, Ginny!" he shouted in what almost sounded like irritation. "I told you not to do anything!" "You said not to use the stupid nerf gun!" she shot back as she dodged wildly and began to run around, evading her pursuers. "I meant don't do anything to get yourself noticed!" he growled as he bulldogged one man's head into the floor. He sprang to his feet and grabbed another man by the back of the head, ramming his face into the stone wall, creating a small crater from which the body slumped only slowly and wetly. "How the hell did they not notice the mostly naked girl in the room?" she yelled, sprinting around the circumference of the room, being chased by yellow-eyed foes. "They're mostly quantum, they don't always perceive real-state things or beings until they're interacted with!" he answered. "They weren't looking for you until you announced yourself!" "Oh, you and your weird physics shit!" she groused, her robe coming more and more undone as she ran. One of her tits was exposed, bouncing annoyingly and the nipple hardening as a cold wind from the endless holes in her walls and windows blew into the room. "Now what?" "Well, since they know you're here, you might as well use the gun," he answered as he tackled a small knot of them who were looking to cut off her avenue of escape. "At least then you can defend yourself if you're careful!" "The fuck am I supposed to do?" she shouted angrily as she clutched the ridiculous, useless gun. "Nerf them to death? Hope I shoot one foam dart down a throat and hope the bastard chokes and dies?" "Didn't you just let me inside all of your orifices?" he pointed out as he spun low, sweeping one foe's feet from under him and then taking him by the ankles to slam him off the floor. "Trust me, Virginia!" "Dammit!" she spat, steeling her nerve, hoping her resolve was harder than her nipple currently was. Taking a deep breath, she stopped running and spun, pointing the gun and pulling the plastic trigger; She yelped in astonishment as coruscating arcs of lightning crackled and lashed out from the muzzle, enveloping several foes, who wailed in glowing agony before disappearing from view. "Jesus H Fucking Tesla!" she exclaimed in amazement as she gaped down at her toy. "Virginia, language!" Santa warned. She rolled her eyes and pointed at another man rushing her, pulling the trigger and watching him explode in a shower of scintillating particles. "This shit will fuck you up!" blared the speakers. The wall splintered next to Ginny and several terrifying creatures barged in, causing her to shriek in fright, they were easily Santa's size, vaguely humanoid but covered in a greyish, segmented carapace, with insectoid heads, evil-looking mandibles and huge claws at the end of four arms. They hissed as the lunged for her. "Fuck fuck fuck!" cried out as she began running. "Fucking hate motherfucking bugs!" She fired wildly behind herself without looking, managing to strike one of the new creatures but only slowing it down. Ginny raced for the stairs, stampeding up them only to find more of the yellow-eyed humanoids waiting for her. "Santa!" she cried out in terror. "Help!" He glanced her way and grimaced at her predicament. "Aw, hell;" With a strength born of the desperation to protect one of his precious children, he surged forward, shoulder-blocking his way through a knot of assailants, springing through the air with astonishing agility, alternately using the wall and railing of the stairs to get to the upper floor, twisting and executing a flying kick that downed a foe about to attack Ginny. "Good thing I wore my enhanced parkour boots tonight, eh?" he muttered as he glared at the foes crowding to get up the stairs or down the hallway at them. "I don't even know what that means." Ginny snapped, backing up warily as the horde coming for them grew in numbers. "If that's some sort of geek speak, then we, are you getting bigger?" "I guess I am," he replied, grimly, glaring at their foes. "I don't expect what I'm saying to make sense, but the other iterations of me, my other selves, they're all coming here, merging with me to help meet the threat." "You're; consolidating?" she asked in disbelief. "That's one way to look at it," he said, his blue eyes flashing. "It's gonna make finishing the Christmas run tight if I get held up here much longer." "Oh, terribly sorry if I'm inconveniencing you, your highness." Ginny said, trying to not sound too snide. He put his body between her and her foes, backing her up against the wall. "They can't come through the wall you're up against, it's the South wall," he said quietly but with a sense of urgency. "You're safe from that angle. You can fire your gun past me or over the rail at the guys down below. Since they're trying to reach you that means they've solidified enough that they can't do crazy things like jump seven meters up to reach you, they'll have to use the stairs." "I thought they were after you." Ginny said hotly. "They were, until you announced yourself with a jug of nog," he pointed out. "Now they want to destroy you to hurt me." "Oh. Sorry." Ginny mumbled somewhat sheepishly. "You can make it up to me later!" he said as he surged forward suddenly, bulling his way through the approaching crowd, clotheslining several at once. Shouts went up and the fight was on again. Santa punched, kicked, elbowed, kneed and wrenched his way through the enemy horde. Ginny swore he was indeed bigger than he had been earlier. His already hard body physique was almost bulging with muscles now, like a California beach bodybuilder. Black blood glistened on his flawless skin as he maimed the attackers. Droplets that hit the carpet sizzled and ate through it, burning the hardwood floor beneath. "No!" Ginny wailed in despair. "Not the hardwood! I loved that feature!" She glared and gritted her teeth as she leaned over the railing and pointed the nerf gun down at the endless crowd on the main floor, pulling the trigger. The crackling arcs of energy enveloped several foes, who wailed and vanished. Same as before, the giant insectoids rarely disappeared but seemed slowed or staggered by the attack. Santa fought his way forward, forcing the attackers back from Ginny. Try as they might, no one got by him, even if it meant that they could strike at him instead. He took their assaults resolutely, using his body as a shield to protect her. Before long, the floor of the hallway was littered with bodies, some barely stirring, others not moving at all. Still, the foes swarmed up the stairs. One of the bug-things swiped at him with its vicious claws and he ducked under the blow before kicking his boot into one of the reverse-jointed legs, snapping it. The bug screeched and tumbled and he leapt onto its back, grabbing hold of one of the large, wet-grey chitinous plates that armored its back and pulled, it tore away with a mushy crack and the beast's keened agony as it shuddered and thrashed. Without pausing, Santa whirled around and slammed the exoskeletal plate across several men's heads, dropping them. Ginny kept firing the nerf tesla gun, wondering what sort of sociopath would invent a deadly weapon that looked like a famous kid's toy. She pushed it from her mind, realizing that she wanted to live and didn't care at the moment about the social mores of the issue. Santa was using the huge chitin plate almost like a shield, driving his foes back with it to the stairs. It finally cracked in half and he punched through the mess, unwilling to give the enemy time to regroup. He spun one man around with a fist across the jaw before grabbing his arms from behind and ramming his knee into the man's back, lifting him off the floor and letting him slam his spine onto the stairs. Without waiting, Santa launched himself through the air, knee raised and smashed it into the face of a man on the stair's corner landing. The foe's head went back through the wall with a loud crunch and he hung there limply, no longer part of the battle. "Ack!" Ginny squawked as the nerf gun sputtered and let out several impotent flashes and then died. "Not now! No no no!" One foe had broken through the cordon and now raced toward her. She yelled loudly and smashed the butt of her nerf gun into his face, staggering him for a moment. She glared at him angrily, waiting for him to fall, but her didn't, so she kicked him in the crotch with her instep. He groaned and sunk to his knees, holding himself. Ginny was practically jumping up and down on top of him by the time he stopped moving. "Stay; the; fuck; down!" she shouted angrily as she turned his ribcage into powder. She failed to notice the one last foe who rushed up behind her. But then Santa was at her side and he delivered a devastating haymaker to the man's thorax. Stunned, the intruder staggered back against the railing. With a growl, Santa grabbed him by the face and ruthlessly bent his back over the railing before leaping over and slamming his elbow across the man's neck as he went down to the main floor. The lifeless form crumpled next to him as he looked around, glaring. No foes remained standing. Aside from the music, all was quiet. "It is safe?" Ginny called from the gallery. "Are the scary guys and bug-thingies all gone?" "No," Santa said warily. "And the next wave is even bigger." "Great!" Ginny complained, tossing the useless nerf gun over the side. "And according to you, there's no one that can help us!" "I didn't say that," he countered, beckoning for her to come down the stairs and be near him for protection. "I just said there was no Easter Bunny." "No Superman either, apparently," she grumbled as she approached him, letting him put a huge arm around her possessively. He was, indeed, bigger than ever. She was practically child-sized next to him now. "So who the hell is there to help us?" "If help's arriving it had better get here soon," he said, taking her to the remains of her big glass bay windows and back door. The wind was howling as snow drove into the living room. What was left of it, anyway. Which was nothing. "It's now or never. Can you see them?" She peered into the darkness outside and a chill ran down her spine, hundreds of red and yellow glowing eyes could be seen in the darkness. And they seemed to be getting closer. "Do; do they see me?" she asked, swallowing nervously. "I'm sure they do," he said, grimacing. "Not going to take a chance and assume they don't. I'll do everything I can to protect you, of course." "Is; is that going to be enough?" She could hear the angry hisses and an evil chanting outside clearly now, getting closer with each moment. It pained Santa that he couldn't lie to her. "I don't know, Virginia." She sighed and smiled weakly. "Well, at least I know there's a Santa Claus now. And he gave me the night of my life before it all ended." He returned the smile, trying to feign a cheerfulness he didn't feel. "I don't;" Ginny faltered, trying to find the words. "I don't suppose that you'd; well; that you'd be willing to kiss me one last time? You know, before the end?" He turned to look down at her, his hands holding her arms with an unreal gentleness and a warmth in his eyes that comforted her even now. "Nothing would make me happier, Virginia." She smiled and closed her eyes. "Merry Christmas, Santa." "Merry Christmas, Virginia;" he said softly as he leaned down to kiss her. Then the night was filled with high-pitched shrieks, a noise that made her eyes snap open. She'd heard noises like that before, once a long time ago in grade school. It sounds like the hissing passage of meteors above, and getting closer. Or what she imagined artillery sounded like when it was incoming, like in all those war movies. Santa's head turned and an almost evil grin crept over his face as he listened. "That's more like it!" he declared, standing tall and pointing at the blackness of the night. "Watch the sky, Virginia;" She looked up and noticed glittering points of light, dozens of them, seeming to get closer. The hissing shriek was indeed their approach and they seemed to be aimed right at them. She felt Santa's hand squeeze on her shoulder, almost in excitement. His blue eyes were blazing ferociously. Finally, what looked like dozens of giant icicles, each larger and longer than a semi, lanced out of the night sky and slammed into the earth around her house, shaking it as they buried their tips in the frozen ground and came to a stop. Several impaled the intruders as they came in, while others kicked up a covering spray of snow as the enemy stopped and looked around in confusion. Then doors or portals opened on the sides of the titan icicles and tall, lithe beings began leaping out of them, wearing weird, form-fitting armor and carrying space-age guns and swords or axes. Their armor and long hair was a riot of colors that was reflected by the snow and ice. Wild, ululating war cries pierced the air. And a savage, bloody battle began on her property. "Who the hell are they?" Ginny almost yelled in astonishment as she watched. They moved with inhuman grace and speed, the ones not wearing helmets revealing long, beautiful facial features that were often frightening because of the wrath they displayed. The helmets were all tall and peaked, showing fearsome designs and glowing eyes. Weird runes pulsed and throbbed with light all over their armor. Guns hissed and shrieked while swords hummed as they slew. "My elves," Santa said, clearly pleased and also eager to fight but not willing to leave her side yet. "They got my call and converged on my position." "Those are elves?" she exclaimed in amazement. "Aren't they cutesy little toy-shop people?" "Cute myth, but no, not these ones," he replied, watching as several elves wearing bone-white armor with feminine features raced past, throwing themselves into a knot of the hulking bugs. They screamed and the masks of their wild-maned helmets gave off vibrations that shook Ginny's teeth in her head as it melted their foes' faces off. "No, a lot of my elves are warriors, meant to help me fight Krampus. They keep Christmas safe with me." "What the hell are they wearing?" she asked in disbelief. How could this weird night get any weirder? Santa sighed. "Truth? They've been spending way too much time playing Warhammer 40k and they; appropriated armor, weapons and tactics from the Eldar faction. They're space elves." "Wow. Gay;" she muttered, shaking her head. "Well, they're certainly earning their keep tonight." He nodded. "Been a long time since Krampus moved against us this hard. Apparently he got bored and was feeling uppity. That or he just forgot what a good thrashing felt like." Ginny watched as three elves, clad in scary black armor and wearing helmets that looked like peaked skulls, marched relentlessly forward, firing little rockets from elaborate launchers they carried in their hands and on suspensor harnesses. The rockets punctured the bugs' chitin shells and exploded inside them, sending shards of exoskeleton and stinking goo in every direction. Ginny squeaked and hid behind Santa as some of the nasty effluence landed right where she'd been standing only a moment before. Beams of super-heated plasma and tiny, shuriken-like projectiles hissed and whizzed by them, the remains of her lovely house now the center of a battleground while the winter storm raged on. Warriors in green armor, carrying weapons that looked like a horrifying hybrid of sword and chainsaw, tore into a knot of foes, slicing them to bloody ribbons. As savage as the battle had been earlier, when it had just been her and Santa, she suddenly appreciated its relative civility. "They need my help," Santa said finally, cracking his knuckles, his expression grim. "We have to finish this off or Christmas won't come on time." "I thought you said there was plenty of time." Ginny protested, frowning up at him. "There was," he admitted. "But in order to defeat Krampus' minions, I summoned every single quantum iteration of myself back to here to help me fight. No one is delivering presents anywhere at the moment. I can't change real-time if I'm here in my entirety." He turned and looked at her. "Hopefully we're keeping them busy enough that they don't worry about you. Stay against the wall and work the music, will you?" "Manning the music station," she said, nodding, focusing on giving herself a task. "Music for Santa and his homicidal elves to kill by. Got it;" She watched as Santa leapt through the shattered remains of her bay doors into the howling storm and crashed into a knot of foes, savaging them. She watched in disbelief for some time, trying to figure out how Santa could kill anyone. I mean, even serial murderers got presents in prison, didn't they? Maybe they didn't, she had no way of knowing and chalked up thinking about this to what could only be described as the weirdest night of her life. She squealed and dodged out of the way as a body came flying through the doors and landed next to her. She scrambled over to the entertainment center and stood in front of it, trying to figure out what the hell she should play. "Okay;" she breathed, trying to focus. "Mass slaughter music; mass slaughter music;" What constituted mass slaughter music? Death metal? Panic At The Disco? Teletubbies music? She had no playlists, so she began cycling through the radio, hoping to find anything that might suffice. Oldies; Christmas music; hip-hop; trance; disco; "Son of a fuck," she muttered. "This is harder than it looks." She finally came across a station playing 'Jailhouse Rock' and decided that was good enough, she was sick of looking. She winced, trying to ignore another splintering crash as a body came through her wall. She hugged herself but then felt her robe. She frowned as she looked down at it, realizing it had been thoroughly shredded in the fight earlier. Those shuriken-thingies had been cutting it real close. Ginny grumbled as she pulled it off and threw it away, standing there completely naked, it hadn't been keeping her warm in its current condition and she was thoroughly beyond giving a shit at this point about who saw her naked. They were all too damn busy tearing one another apart anyway. And that sort of pissed her off. She was buck-naked and no one seemed to care. She'd shaved her cunt for this? "And I thought my night sucked before," she sighed to no one in particular. "Not getting my cunt pounded had been my biggest complaint before this hack!" She never saw the menacing shadow that had slipped up behind her. Santa picked one of his foes up overhead and hurled him into a cluster of foes, bowling them all over. He then punched another man as he tried to run by, knocking him off his feet and into his back. A quick stamp on his solar plexus made sure he stopped moving. The huge man thrust his fist in the air and shouted loudly. "Clear!" he thundered, indicating no other enemies surrounded him. His elves responded in kind, many of them gathering in a tight ring about him, weapons facing out as they sought to protect him. Hundreds of bodies lay strewn across the landscape, some burning from plasma blasts, other shredded and blown apart by rockets or sliced into bloody jerky. The storm seemed to be abating, no longer a blizzard so much as a stiff wind and swirls of snow. "Sire, we detect no enemies in the immediate vicinity," one elf wearing blue armor with a tall, crested helmet announced, striding up and saluting by thumping his gauntleted fist over his heart. "This attack has been defeated." "Maybe," Santa said, looking around warily. "But that doesn't mean anything just yet. We have to secure the area, make sure Virginia is alright and then get back to” "Kringle!" "Damn," he muttered to himself. "I thought this was too easy." He made several complex gestures, sending his elves fanning out in a wide arc as he began trudging forward through the snow, heading toward where the voice had come from out of the night. The winds and squalls of snow continued to die down until there was an almost deafening silence, the moon shining brightly overhead and revealing the sheer carnage of the battle that had been waged, the snow and ice glittered with frozen blood. "Kringle!" snarled the inhuman voice angrily. "I'm coming, I'm coming!" Santa said loudly, scowling. "Don't get your panties in a bunch!" He stopped in a clearing on the other side of the house, glowering at who confronted him, the beast was not as tall as he was, nor as muscular, but horrifying in aspect. The backward-jointed, hairy legs ended in wicked hooves. The skin not covered in coarse black fur was almost as dark and criss-crossed with innumerable scars. The vascular chest was crowned with a strong neck and sitting atop it was a blasphemous head, a demonic goat's visage from which grew four evil, twisting horns. The red eyes blazed like wrathful coals and sharp teeth glistened wetly inside the hateful mouth. Krampus. And in one of his powerful, clawed hands, he held Virginia by the neck, who looked like a rag doll. "Hi, Santa;" she said weakly, looking very apologetic. Santa kept walking forward, clenching his fists. "By all means, Kringle, keep coming forward if you mean to slay the child." Krampus growled, starting to squeeze and causing Ginny to shudder in fear. Santa stopped dead in his tracks, his eyes narrowing. His elves had now cast a tight net around the scene, hemming in Krampus. One circle of warriors faced inward, pointing their weapons at the abomination while another behind them faced out, prepared for any further attacks. Santa didn't move. "Let the girl go, Krampus," he said levelly. "This doesn't concern her." "Oh, I beg to differ," said the beastman in an almost non-chalant tone. "It's always about the children, isn't it?" "Hey!" said Ginny angrily. "I am not a child, jerk! I'm twenty, Gurr!" "Oh, do stop talking, you're such an annoyance." Krampus said, giving her neck another warning squeeze. "Let the adults work this out." "There's nothing to work out, Krampus," Santa growled, his blue eyes flashing. "You'll let the girl go." "I think we both know that's not happening," intoned the vile intruder. "She is my victory over you, and you know it. Revenge is not only a dish best served cold but often. And not often enough for me." "About this cold revenge dish thing," Ginny said, squirming slightly. "Couldn't; couldn't I just find you a nice tin can to chew on instead?" "Shut up, girl!" Krampus said harshly while several elves could be heard to chuckle and even Santa smirked at her jest. "I hold your life in my hands, to dispose of as I please." His foul breath crackled in the cold night air. His touch was uncomfortably warm, almost hot and strangely kept her body from freezing in the winter night. His touch felt evil and her skin crawled in revulsion. His strength was terrifying. "It wasn't enough that I slaved in coal mines for you, giving you carbon lumps to deliver to naughty children," Krampus growled, glaring at Santa. "It wasn't enough that I found the worst of them and brought them to you in the night so you could lecture them." "Hey, nobody asked you or ordered you to do the coal thing, pal," Santa said angrily. "And the whole kidnapping kids thing was your idea. I decided to let you have some creative control and look what happened. When it didn't work out, you decided that beating naughty kids with reeds was the answer. You're damn right that wasn't good enough!" "Silence!" Krampus snarled loudly, stamping one of his clawed hooves and making the ground shake dangerously. "Your kind-hearted foolishness with these puny mortals changed nothing about their behavior! Your failure to recognize their inherent selfishness was why our efforts were doomed!" "These puny mortals?" Santa countered. "You used to be one of them, Pete, remember? You were a well-behaved boy once." "Shut up!" growled Krampus. "Well-behaved, but not good," Santa continued. "You followed the rules and wanted everyone to follow rules. You were a control freak. I brought you north to show you what kindness could do, but you hated the cheer and the happiness and you fled to the coal mines in Greenland, hiding in the dark where the light of Christmas couldn't touch you! And when making kids feel bad with coal didn't bring them into line, you started the whole whipping them with reeds thing. Good job there, Pete!" "I'm warning you, Kringle;" Krampus said dangerously. "Oh, he really gets your goat, doesn't he?" Ginny sneered, causing several elves to laugh loudly. Krampus now snarled furiously and lifted her into the air by her neck, causing her to cry out in pain. Santa watched warily, knowing better than to make a move. "We seem to have an impasse," Krampus said, an evil smile playing over his slavering mouth. "You cannot harm me, because you know I can slay the child, but I cannot as yet slay her because she is my bargaining chip. But my need to hurt you, old man, is so very strong." He lowered Ginny down until her feet were just touching the snow-covered ground. She frowned as she heard a wet slithering sound she could not identify. "And there are other ways to hurt you than slaying the poor dear, aren't there?" Ginny felt something slimy touch her leg and then start to crawl up it, wrapping around her smooth skin. She shuddered and squirmed in horror as she realized exactly what was happening. The snake-like appendage wound up her thigh and then behind her. She gasped as it slid between her ass cheeks and then underneath to her cunt. She felt the blunt head split her lips and then move upward again. "Don't do this, Krampus." Santa said, trying to figure out what to do without hurting Ginny. "And why not?" replied the qliphotic abomination. "Don't you have a present for me? Then I guess I'll have to give myself one." Krampus' organ continued to slither its way around her body, leaving a glistening trail on her skin. She stiffened and moaned as his appendage wrapped around her tits, squeezing them, the head pausing and teasing the nipples. "Hey, asshole, dinner and a movie first!" she spat angrily. Ginny was about to say something else when the large, grayish cockhead snaked up in front of her face and then plunged into her mouth, causing her to gag and go silent. Her eyes widened and she thrashed furiously, but to no avail. He was simply too strong. "Language, young lady." Krampus chided, still staring at Santa. "Hasn't Santa taught you anything?" "This isn't gonna end well for you, Pete." Santa said, his tone dire. "Christmas never does, Kringle," replied the demon, his cock sliding in and out of Ginny's mouth. "I'm just hoping to make the holiday every bit as awful and intolerable for you as it is for me. After all, misery loves company." He brought her body close to his head and his other hand reached over and stroked her cunt lips, which were glistening. He leered at his foe, knowing Santa was helpless to get closer. "Is she good down here?" Krampus said mockingly. "Nice and wet and tight for you? Was she the best one ever, in the endless list of good girls you have fucked?" Santa said nothing, just glaring at Krampus. His knuckles were white as he clenched his fists. "Sharing your toys is the spirit of Christmas, isn't it?" Krampus said evilly, finally pulling his cock out of her mouth. Ginny coughed and sputtered, tendrils of resinous spittle and worse trailing away from her lips. She glared at Krampus but was still immobilized. "Just get this over with and fuck me already, whip-cock," she spat. "You won't be my first egotistical disappointment, trust me." Krampus' eyes blazed red and his tongue sped around her naked form blindingly quickly while he released her from his clawed grip. The tongue wrapped and immobilized her arms, holding them out straight while still encircling her tits. It then snaked around her waist and legs, pinning those as well while his long cock, swaying about like a cobra, came to a stop in front of her swollen cunt lips. The head teased and tapped against the opening, causing her to moan and squirm. "As you wish, child;" The head forced itself through her lips, sliding deep inside her. Ginny cried out in a mixture of shock and indescribable pleasure. She felt the tip of his pointed tongue probe trailing around her nipples. The python-like length of his cock churned inside her cunt. The blinding light behind her eyes finally receded and she lifted her head, looking out into the night, feeling his tongue constricting around her neck. She could dimly see a huge being in red pants and black boots watching nearby, his powerful chest exposed. The startling blue eyes flashed in the darkness of the night. She could tell he wanted to rescue her but didn't dare come closer. She gasped and shuddered as Krampus' cock pushed still deeper inside her. She felt fuller than she had imagined possible, the slithering appendage stretching her wide. The sticky, squelching noises were hardly to be believed. "Ew, gross! Hentai noises!" she thought in revulsion. "Krampus;" Santa warned. His elves all pointed their weapons menacingly but he held up his hand, staying them. "The child is naughty," Krampus said, smiling through pointed teeth. "Very naughty. Such a sordid past." "Hey, back off, she was young and needed the money!" Santa snapped defensively. "That thing with the midget and the donkey was” "You're not helping here!" Ginny shouted, blushing furiously, even as Krampus violated her. "Wicked child," growled the vile demon, shoving his cock in and out of her, the peristaltic actions of its length causing her to writhe and squirm in his grip, her breath coming in ragged gasps. "Shameless. Even though I violate her, she finds a way to be concerned about how you perceive her. I find it; titillating." "Oh, do I make you horny?" she sneered, turning her head to smirk at him. "Couldn't tell, looking at that head of yours." "Silence!" Krampus hissed, spittle flying from his jaws, his eyes flashing angrily. "I hold your life and death in my hands." "How would I know?" she shot back. "Hope you're better with your hands than you are with your cock, Billy G." He plunged his cock deeper still inside her. She went rigid and cried out. "That all you got?" she rasped, trying not to faint as she felt popping inside her hips while he stetched her. "My brother got in deeper than that when we were little!" "Insolent!" Krampus snarled savagely, bouncing her up and down and he fucked her harder than ever, pulling on her arms and legs, stretching her joints til they creaked. She felt a deep, wet heat building inside her and in spite of the horror she consciously felt about the situation, even more dire was her need to cum. She felt her cunt squeezing around his cock. His snake-like tongue probed her ass and wriggled inside, further adding to her desperation. "Intholent bith, you will be punithed!" "What was that?" Santa asked, turning his head slightly and putting his hand to his ear. "I couldn't understand you, it's like you have a lisp or something." "Don't mock meef!" Krampus said angrily, his tongue whipping out of Ginny's ass, causing her to yelp suddenly. "I'll kill her, Kringle!" "Not before I cum, damn you!" Ginny panted, her body flushed and covered in sweat as she twisted and writhed in his grip. "Uh, so close, goddammit!" "Language!" Santa and Krampus both snapped at her. "Aw, c'mon!" she wailed. "You two are total pains in the ass! Do it, Billy! Show me what a bad boy you are!" Krampus glared at her and began fucking her harder than ever. "As you wish, child!" "Krampus!" Santa shouted, reaching out his hand in alarm. "Don't!" Krampus grinned evilly at Santa, his teeth clenching as he drew close to climax. His cock seemed to swell along its length, stretching her wider still. She threw her head back and gritted her teeth, straining as she was overwhelmed by sensation; Santa's fist slammed across Krampus' jaw with a powerful crack. The demonoid's eyes rolled into his head and he crumpled to the ground. Ginny wailed in frustration as his cock pulled out of her and retreated back to his body, like a wet, slimy Stanley tape measure. She collapsed to her hands and knees in the snow, panting and shaking, her eyes wide. Santa raced up and knelt next to her, his eyes shining with concern. "Fuck;" Ginny whispered, gasping for air. "Motherfucker;" She looked up at her rescuer now, her eyes flashing accusingly. "The hell? Couldn't you have let him make me cum first?" Santa paused. "What?" "I was so damn close!" she hissed, standing up and stamping her foot. "I was within half a second of the orgasm of my life and you had to choose that moment to intervene and play the hero! Don't expect a thank you card!" "Uh, Virginia," Santa said, rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly, trying to figure out what to say. "If he had brought you to orgasm, it would have killed you. When Krampus climaxes, his appendage you were so attached to bursts into spikes, basically killing you from the inside while denying you your orgasm." She paused and then deflated. "Holy cobra dildos. What a bastard." Ginny then pointed a finger at her savior. "But you still owe me an orgasm, then, pal. You may have rescued me from certain death, but that doesn't mean I don't need relief." Santa looked really confused. "What, here? Now?" "Damn straight," she said firmly, suddenly remembering she was buck naked in a snow-storm. In spite of the no-doubt freezing weather, her body was still warm and very wet with need. She put her hand down her cunt and felt around for a moment before presenting her sticky palm and fingers to Santa for inspection. "Do I look satisfied to you? You've already fucked me, Screamo the Goat Boy just fucked me, who cares if your freaky gay elves watch us? I need satisfaction now and I already am aware that you can't say no." Santa sighed. "It's gotta be quick, Virginia. I'm really behind, now that I'm completely temporal in one location." "Whatever, just get me to the promised land, man." Ginny replied, shrugging. "Who knows, maybe your entourage might enjoy a show." "Oh, right, about that," Santa said, standing up tall and shouting loudly. "About; Face!" As a single unit, the elves all turned around smartly on their heels, still arranged in a protective ring around their liege and his companion, weapons ready as they scanned the darkness for trouble, their eyes glowing menacingly inside their helmets. Santa strode up to Ginny, towering over her and ignoring the prostrate form of the still-unconscious Krampus, snuffling nearby. She smiled up at him, somehow warmed by his presence, in spite of the icy night she should have frozen to death in already. He pulled her into his arms and kissed her deeply. She moaned into his mouth as she felt her already molten core getting even more heated in response to his touch. Tongues tangled and played as he took her ass cheeks in his hands and squeezed them, making her shiver. Ginny's hands fumbled with his large black belt until it fell away and then pulled down his red pants. He pulled her onto his powerful thighs, resting her on them. She hooked her legs behind his waist and began grinding her wet, eager cunt against his hardening cock, which swelled readily. Her head was almost spinning, she was so horny. "Hmm, give it to me, baby," she purred, feeling the head of his cock touch her cunt lips. "Make me cum hard and fast." She sighed loudly as he pulled her close, penetrating and sliding deep inside her. Ginny moaned shamelessly as Santa once again began to pump back and forth inside her. His huge cock stretched her cunt wide, but not in the violent, violating way Krampus did. This felt warm and utterly perfect. She nipped at the skin of his chest while he moved in and out of her. "Yes," Ginny breathed as he began to moved faster, pumping strongly and rhythmically. She could feel her wetness trickling down between her cheeks, her cunt clutching at him hungrily, greedily and unwilling to let go until it was somehow sated. "Oh, God, just what I needed. Yes, fuck me, Santa!" He gripped her tight and thrust into her, picking up his pace just the way she wanted. She was gasping and yelping now and he squeezed her cheeks, one of his fingers poking inside her puckered knot. She clenched her teeth and groaned at the intrusion, murmuring that she loved it. She grew warmer and warmer, her body tingling with an exquisite fire that rippled out from her core. Santa turned her around and set her feet on top of his boots, bending her forward and pulling on her arms. She cried out as he fucked her harder, his hips thumping against her ass cheeks. Her hands clenched wildly, her breath coming in gasps as his overwhelming strength dominated her. "Oh, God!" she panted, beginning to shudder uncontrollably, almost drooling. "Uh, cum in me, dammit! Fucking cum in me!" Santa pulled on her arms even tighter as his thighs slammed into her. Ginny strained, craning her neck, teeth clenched as she tried not to scream, but it was no use, she wailed loudly as he came inside her, filling her once again in a way she could not describe. Her orgasm shook every last atom of her being, transporting her to a world of nothing but pleasure, edged with mint. She buckled, hanging loosely in his arms, exhausted. She'd been fucked hard at least five times tonight and had a dreadful suspicion that this experience would only make her libido even more hyperactive. She sighed as Santa scooped her naked form into his arms and cuddled her against the cold. Ginny purred and traced a fingernail across his broad chest. "Thank you," she said quietly. "Just what the doctor ordered. That quenched the flames, for now." He finally put her down and she looked at the remains of her ruined chateau, which was completely leveled and now on fire. "Poor Oatmeal," she murmured. "Where am I going to live?" She scowled down at the still supine Krampus, anger flaring in her. "It's this jack wagon’s fault. You should totally napalm his face." Santa looked down at her in shock. "Did you just say I should jerk off in Krampus' face?" "Damn right, he'd deserve it too." Ginny announced. "That and shove your sleigh up his ass." "I am not jizzing in Krampus' face." Santa said, clearly repulsed by the suggestion. "Fine, leave a woman to do a man's job," Ginny said testily, striding over to Krampus and putting one leg on either side of his head. She stuck three fingers inside her cunt and managed to tease out considerable amounts of Santa's minty cum, which she smeared all over Krampus' face and into his fur with glee, even giving him a glistening white moustache. "Take that, asshole!" She looked like she might have been done desecrating the unconscious form, but then she paused and squatted over him, peeing on his body and face, the stream steaming in the cold night air. She grinned evilly as she thoroughly baptized him. "Teach you to mess with me." Ginny muttered as she walked back to Santa, nodding. The huge man had a wide smirk on his face and shook his head slowly. "I can't believe you just pissed all over Krampus," he said, hugging her to him. "However, you're going to freeze to death at this rate;" He held out his hand and one of his elves dutifully brought him a large, velvety red cloak, which he wrapped around her. She blushed and smiled gratefully at his consideration, but only until he slid it off her, revealing that she was now wearing some ridiculous 'Hot Christmas Elf' outfit, complete with striped stockings and high heels. She looked like a Yule whore. "Seriously?" she asked, unimpressed. "This is your solution to my naked issues?" He shrugged. "I liked you better naked, but you would freeze quickly." "Whatever," she sighed, looking down and appreciating the considerable lift it gave her cleavage. It was incredibly warm, in spite of how scant it was. "So now what? I still have no damn home, you and Goatse here blew it up with your little barnyard brawl." Santa looked around warily. "That might be the least of your worries. The wind's picking up again, which means that another assault is coming. We need to get out of here." "Sire!" said one of the armored elves, thumping his fist to his breastplate and bowing his head. "We will cover you. You must go while you still have a head-start and the dark one is unconscious." Santa nodded. "Yeah, he's not gonna be happy when he wakes up and he's really gonna want revenge on you, Virginia." She felt her mouth go dry at the notion of another battle and Krampus waking up to even the score. "So; now what?" Santa shrugged. "I'd say it's fairly obvious. I've still got to make my rounds before the night is over and I'm not leaving you here;" She gaped as he put his hands on her shoulders and looked down into her eyes. "Virginia, you're coming with me and you're going to help save Christmas." Chapter 3, Christmas Wishes "How the hell do you drive this thing?" Ginny called in a panic, her eyes wide as she held onto the reigns, twisting them wildly as she tried to steer. Up ahead of her, eight large reindeer squealed and thrashed their heads. The sleigh corkscrewed while it hurtled through the cold night air, the moon shining down on them. "Well, first of all, stop panicking," Santa replied as he stood on the back of the sleigh, atop his huge red sack of toys. He was more or less back to his original size she had become accustomed to, now that he had sent his other 'iterations' of himself out over the globe to deliver presents. "That would be an excellent start." "Easy for you to say," she snapped, scowling back at him for a moment since taking her eyes off her designated path seemed to make no difference to how she was doing at navigating. "You're used to doing this!" "Trust me, between the two of us, you're the one with the easy job right now and I'd be happy to trade," he called back as he ducked wildly. A comically large rocket thundered by, with an evil-looking man strapped to the bottom of it, swinging a weapon wildly to hit Santa. "Try to keep her steady!" "While dodging psychos on rockets, no problem!" she grumbled, trying to ignore the howling wind and roaring projectiles. "Have I mentioned Krampus is a gigantic asshole?" "Repeatedly," Santa answered, watching warily. The sky was threaded with jets of fire as their enemies kept coming about in ponderous, elliptical arcs and heading back towards them, intent on their destruction. They had only just pulled off from the smoldering remains of Ginny's country chateau when the assault began. Krampus was nowhere to be seen, but his minions were clearly determined to avenge him. "Maybe urinating on him wasn't such a good idea. He never did take humiliation well." Ginny squawked in alarm and ducked as a rocket streaked right at her. Santa jumped in the air, doing the splits to avoid the projectile and landing back on top of his present sack. Another tried to pull up alongside them but Santa grabbed the harness the man was wearing and wrenched the rocket off course, sending it speeding into one some distance away. Both rockets (and presumably their pilots) exploded in a violent orgy of noise and flashing lights. "Really hope people just think those are fireworks," Santa muttered as he looked glared balefully at yet another rocket considering approaching. "Fireworks right in the middle of the world's most spastic meteor shower. Sure, they'll buy that;" "Funny part is I can't tell if you're serious," Ginny said loudly. "If they don't believe that narrative, then they've gotta accept that Santa Claus was engaged in an epic air battle over their town with quantum men strapped to rockets." "Truth is often stranger than fiction," Santa agreed, nodding. "Fighting these jerks off is taking too much time!" "Well, don't you have anything in your back of tricks there?" Ginny asked. In spite of the sleigh being open, it seemed to have some weird form of climate control and she'd been getting rather warm. To that end she'd pulled down her top, exposing her tits to cool herself off. The breeze allowed through made her nipples tingle delightfully, but not enough to distract her from driving the sleigh. After all, she often drove ninety minutes to her job wearing a vibrating insert in her panties, so she knew for a fact she could orgasm and still control a vehicle. A wheeled one, at least. She wasn't so sure about a sleigh doing Mach Three at twenty thousand feet. "You mean a weapon?" Santa asked. "In the bag full of toys for kids?" "You gave me a nerf gun out of that bag and it turned out to be some sort of doomsday device, didn't it?" she pointed out. "Scary lightning bolts everywhere. I refuse to believe you don't have some other goodies in there." Santa shrugged and squatted down to look inside the bag, getting narrowly missed by another rocket that shot over his head. The pilot cursed and came around again, aiming directly at the chassis of the sleigh from the side. Ginny's eyes widened in fright as she saw him approach. She jerked the reins to one side and the sleigh tilted ninety degrees, presenting its wide, flat red underside. The rocket slammed into it and exploded. Whatever it was made of or whatever shielding was in place, Ginny only heard the detonation and felt a rumble, but there was no damage aside from that. "Ha!" Santa said, standing tall and holding an electric guitar in the air, its black body gleamed in the moonlight. He put the strap around his neck and took several seconds to tune it, ignoring the aerial mayhem that swirled around him. "The hell are you going to do with that?" Ginny asked, scowling as she looked behind to see what he was up to. "You said to find something, I found something," he said simply as he checked the pickups. "Now let's see what we can do here;" He took the pick in hand and strummed it across the strings, a screeching pulse of sound blared out from the instrument, heading in all directions. It struck several rockets nearby, which exploded brightly. Other were knocked off course, spiraling around crazily as they fought for control. Santa laughed loudly, apparently enjoying himself. "Quit laughing and kill, red man!" Ginny yelled, nonplussed by his amusement. "I want to survive the night and I've had several close calls with death already!" "I'm working on it, Virginia, patience." Santa chided, adjusting the tuners momentarily. "Near-death experiences make you cranky." "No shit, Sherlock," she grumbled as he blasted out another screeching wave of sound. "Do you plan to play anything or just keep shrieking out that one sound?" "As you wish," he said cheerfully, pleased to be doing as she asked. Making her happy was all he cared about. He began playing a heavy metal version of Wagner's 'Ride of the Valkyries', the pulsing walls of sound thundering out and striking every foe within hundreds of

It looks like the very tip top of the meta was hit in these recent updates and we’ll be talking about if that was a good thing or not.  A … Read More

Send us a textPlease consider supporting LOOK OUT, SIR! on PATREON, which occasionally features fancy EXCLUSIVE CONTENT: https://www.patreon.com/lookoutsir40k We also have MERCHANDISE available to purchase from Rev-Level: https://www.rev-level.com/lookoutsir40k  LOOK OUT, SIR!'S SOCIAL MEDIA LINKS:• Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/lookoutsir/ • Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/lookoutsir40k/ • YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/lookoutsir40k  PHIL'S SOCIAL MEDIA LINKS:• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/beyondthetabletop/ • YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCAxBqN_9PHjajPLoIKKNi6w  DAN'S SOCIAL MEDIA LINK:• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/i.r.invested.in.unexpected/  Thanks very much for taking the time to listen and by extension support our podcast. We hugely appreciate it and hope that you enjoy the show.

THIS EPISODE The game comes to an end... ----more---- ABOUT THE STORY The Hounds of Hübschdorf (formerly called 'Grauwald's Game') is an epic fantasy audiobook by Audio Epics that has been released on Halloween, since it has serious dark fantasy and grimdark vibes. This brand new Witch Hunter Tale is the direct prequel to Witch Hunter. If you like a dark adventure story you'll probably enjoy this grim journey in the original fantasy setting of Hruda, inspired by everything we love: RPG settings like the Old World from Warhammer fantasy, eighties fantasy movies and J.R.R. Tolkien's Middle-earth (amongst others).   PLOT SUMMARY When three Witch Hunters fail to return from a routine investigation, Master Ludlov and Initiate Tolfmann find themselves in a small village near the woods. While investigating the strange disappearance of their Brethren, it becomes obvious the mayor is not so keen on their arrival, and the villagers seem to prefer the distraction of the Graunacht festivities to their nosing around. When their inquest reveals a dark mystery involving evil magic and undead, Ludlov faces the true cause of the threat in a place more disturbing than he could have imagined.   WANT TO SUPPORT US? Listen to our other stories on this channel. Like, share, comment and talk about us on social media: @AudioEpics

Warhammer Meta Chasers is a weekly competitive Warhammer 40k hype show.  We run down some of the biggest and best events coming up this weekend where we discuss Warhammer 40k Factions in attendance and highlight army lists from some of the top ranked players around the globe. We talk about what the meta is, what it will be and how you can stack up against it. The show is hosted by Paul Murphy, Adam Camilleri, and Dustin Henshaw. The show runs LIVE every week on YouTube around 9pm EST every Thursday.  We sincerely invite you to join us in chat if you can make it.  The show is pushed to the Podcast aggregators soon after!  We have an amazing chat community.  Check out our Patreon here: https://www.patreon.com/WarhammerMetaChasers Join us live each and every Thursday on YouTube and join in our awesome chat community. Want to message the show another way?  Hit up Paul on twitter @warmaster_tpm or on Instagram @fightswithdice

ChemRat Radio and the Under the Hive of Madness studios are as empty and silent as a slumbering Tomb World as our cast takes sometime off for the Holidays. But don't worry, they have some goodies to share, including how to mispronounce common 40K terms, before dipping a toe into the Lore behind the Wizard of Oz. Under the Hive of Madness is a Warhammer 40k Podcast diving into the Horror and Grimdark elements of the setting, so expect some adult themes, adult language, and more than a handful of Khorney Jokes!“If I only had your brain....” - A Lictor, Probably...Email the show! ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠UndertheHiveofMadness@gmail.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Join us today on Discord! ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Under the Hive of Madness⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠MERCH!⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Become a ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Patron⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠. Find our cast through ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠LinkTree⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Underthehiveofmadness.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Cette semaine : Warhammer 40,000 : Rogue Trader sur Switch 2, annonces Capcom : Monster Hunter Stories 3: Twisted Reflection + MHWilds, Euria, l'IA “green” d'Infomaniak, Pocket Codex, Angelo Valenti Bayraktar - Hildegard, Philips et AOC annoncent des moniteurs… 1000 Hz, Nvidia va vendre son H200 en Chine… et payer les US, AMD FSR Redstone, et Ayaneo Pocket Play. Lisez plutôt Torréfaction #355 : WH40K: Rogue Trader sur Switch 2, MH Stories 3, MHWilds, Euria et Ayaneo Pocket Play avec sa vraie mise en page sur Geekzone. Pensez à vos rétines.

In part 1 of this 2-part show, we reconnect with Boris Michev, who is high on Teams Warhammer. His team, Ignite, just went 5-0 with an amazing strategy and team comp, along with excellent on-the-table execution. In this episode, we break down Boris's approach to team tournaments and how to design a good team comp.And then in part 2 of this show, we break down each of the teams' rounds in detail, going over the ebbs and flows of the tournament!Subscribe to patreon.com/aow40k for part 2

In diesem exklusiven Interview spricht Maurice mit Entwickler Jan Theysen über den enormen Umfang von Dawn of War 4.

https://www.patreon.com/AdeptusRidiculoushttps://www.adeptusridiculous.com/https://twitter.com/AdRidiculoushttps://shop.orchideight.com/collections/adeptus-ridiculousWe finally did it. We read the most cursed, infamous, and absolutely unhinged trilogy in Warhammer 40,000 history: Ian Watson's The Inquisition War.​Back in 1990, before the lore was established, Games Workshop tapped an award-winning sci-fi author to introduce the universe. The result? A disaster featuring Inquisitor Jaq Draco and a retinue that includes a Squat and an assassin who had surgery to transform into a "sexy" Genestealer.​In this anniversary episode, we suffer so you don't have to. We're diving deep into the absolute madness.Support the show

All things competitive in the world of Warhammer 40,000. This week, Eric & Rob are back after a lengthy absence and get caught up on Grotmas and new releases, as well as the top performers from the Leicester GT, Everwinter GT, and Feliz Exterminatus.

Special In Conversation with Jordan Sorcery X Warhammer Film Club cross-over episode!Rick Priestley, the creator of 40k and the co-creator of Warhammer Fantasy joins Jordan Sorcery to talk about the films and TV that influenced his work in this new discussion from the Warhammer Film Club.The Warhammer Film Club podcast brings together lifelong hobbyists and movie fans to talk about the films that influenced the history of Warhammer and our own gaming journeys. Featuring guests like MS Paints, Snipe & Wib, and Peachy talking about movies like Alien 3, The Devils, Starship Troopers, and Monty Python this is the perfect podcast for gamers and cinema goers alike!Rick Priestley has written a guest post on the Jordan Sorcery Patreon all about the creation of 40k and its influences - https://www.patreon.com/jordansorceryThe Warhammer Film Club will return for a new season in 2026!_____________________________ [ ELEMENT GAMES AFFILIATE LINK ]https://elementgames.co.uk/?d=11216[ PATREON ]https://www.patreon.com/jordansorcery[ KO-FI ]https://ko-fi.com/jordansorcery[ YOUTUBE CHANNELS ]History & Editorial: https://youtube.com/ @jordansorceryLongform Conversation: https://youtube.com/ @JordanSorceryPods  [ WEBSITE ]https://jordansorcery.com/#Warhammer #40k #Warhammer40000 #GamesWorkshop #WarhammerFilmClub #MichaelMoorcock #FinalProgramme #TheThing_____________________________ Art, Music, and Copyright: Images used belong to their respective copyright owners Jordan Sorcery Theme by Joylin Music Jordan Sorcery Heraldry by Becka Moor Jordan Sorcery Heraldry and Theme copyright @jordansorcerySupport the show

It's time to kick off our Faction Focus series with a look at the most iconic force in Warhammer 40,000 - the Space Marines. If you've seen anything about Warhammer, you're probably familiar with Space Marines, but what exactly are they? Where do they come from, lore-wise? Why are they the most well-rounded force in the game? And how many different armies are built off of the framework of one codex? In this episode, we take a look at the history, the gameplay styles, and the various variants of the Adeptus Astartes. Also, a brief discussion of the World Championships Warhammer preview, and the different experiences those of us at home had compared to those of us at the event in person. Links: Arbitor Ian on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@ArbitorIan Support Preferred Enemies on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/c/PreferredEnemies Buy Preferred Enemies merch: https://www.preferredenemies.com/merch Preferred Enemies on BlueSky: https://bsky.app/profile/preferredenemies.com Music: "The Whip" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Warhammer is the biggest tabletop war game around. How did they get to the top?Viruses suck. But they can also be modified to collect rare earth elements from mines. Netflix has purchased Warner Bros, giving them the largest share of the streaming market. This can only be good for consumers, right?***We enjoyed a nice drink of Rez which you can get a 10% discount when you type NERDS at the checkout from the Rez website at www.drinkrez.com ***Resources MentionedWarhammer Won. Now We Explore Why Everyone Else Lost. (How Warhammer won)Engineering Viruses for Profit — What Could Possibly Go Wrong? (Biomining viruses deliver rare earth elements but no toxic horrors of mining)Warner Bros. + Netflix = Chaos: The Merger That Broke Hollywood (Netflix & Warner Bros. Discovery Confirm $82.7B Mega-Deal That Reshapes The Industry)Full Show Notes : https://docs.google.com/document/d/1gHzkWzWsy5TKz8TQBONh7lQ3D-AmlrJFirxVy5AkAFI/edit?usp=sharing***If you'd like to be featured on the show, send us an email: Nerds.Amalgamated@gmail.comFollow us on: Facebook || Twitter || TwitchJoin the Community on Discord: https://discord.gg/VqdBVH5aAnd watch us on YouTube: Nerds Amalgamated - YouTube

We have the shiny new Arcane Journal - The Razing of Westernland - in hand and do our take of the escalation style campaign rules and scenarios included in itPLUS the rumour mill is swirling?? What are they saying?[0:03:26] Intro[0:16:40] Path to Glory Overview[1:12:50] Patreon Shoutouts[1:16:38] Rumours of rumours[1:33:45] Patreon Questions[1:52:37] Hobby[2:08:37] WrapupLucent Art Light - https://gameenvy.net/lucent-art-light/gommo's Shaggoth - Clay beast creations - https://www.myminifactory.com/object/3d-print-ancient-centigon-207675Support the ShowJoin the Patreon -https://patreon.com/oldworldfanaticsShop Old World @ Element Games - https://elementgames.co.uk/wargames-and-miniatures-by-game/warhammer-the-old-worldLinks and ShoutoutsOld World Rankings - https://oldworldrankings.com/auAustralian Discord Server - https://discord.gg/yYaTG5svBVFollow UsYouTube - https://www.youtube.com/@oldworldfanaticsBluesky - https://bsky.app/profile/oldworldfanatics.comInstagram - https://www.instagram.com/oldworldfanaticsThreads - https://www.threads.net/@oldworldfanaticsEmail - oldworldfanatics@gmail.comHuge thanks to our monthly supporters!

During our hiatus, we continue our journey into the grim darkness of the far future in Agents of the Inquisition: A Warhammer 40K RPG! Dungeon Master Ryan LaPlante leads an adventure set in the Warhammer: 40,000 universe, adapting D&D 2024 rules to the grim darkness of the 41st Millennium, alongside familiar voices from Canada by Night, Tyler Hewitt, Del Borovic, and Guy Bradford. You can find more episodes of Agents of the Inquisition on whatever podcatcher you're using to listen to this episode now!In the previous episode...Brother Solomon convinced the rest of the inquisitorial band to undergo a secret ceremony from his homeworld, in order to understand each other and become a more cohesive unit, each sharing a secret fear and a secret hope. Featuring players Del Borovic, Guy Bradford, Josh Halbot, and Tyler Hewitt, and Dungeon Master Ryan LaPlante.Enjoying Agents of the Inquisition?- Consider supporting the show for as little as $1 a month to get BTS fun, an ad-free feed, and even add your own character to the podcast! (https://dumbdumbdice.com/join)- Buy merch on our website (https://dumbdumbdice.com/)- Follow us on social media: @dumbdumbdice- Watch our video episodes on YouTube (https://youtube.com/@dumbdumbdice) Artwork by the brilliant Del Borovic- Website & Portfolio (https://delborovic.com/), @deltastic on socialsSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

On this week's episode of Trapped Under Plastic, Scott and Jon discuss whether the hobby is art and what it means.Support the Show on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/trappedunderplasticSupport the Show with Merch: https://teespring.com/stores/trapped-under-plasticFollow Jon: https://www.youtube.com/ninjonFollow Scott: https://www.youtube.com/miniacJoin the FB group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/395664561386239/Listen to the audio versons: http://www.trappedunderplastic.com/On patreon, we offer our patron's the ability to submit topics for us to discuss during a podcast, you get an extended version of the podcast, and you can submit miniatures for us to critique during an episode!TUP Partners:Game Envy:https://gameenvy.net/Cobalt Keep:https://www.cobaltkeep.com/?utm_source=google&utm_medium=wix-smart-campaign&utm_campaign=google-ads-campaign-2024-9-22-49b3c410&gad_source=1&gad_campaignid=21739805257&gbraid=0AAAAA-QQP6zQ49I0nu2BWFgB11V6D7lRW&gclid=Cj0KCQiA6NTJBhDEARIsAB7QHD3M1Xby9Vv8pfW9GIix56yn2OnOPGy7peFaNDEmilE3IHxkqqX5BDYaAqrFEALw_wcBMonument Hobbies:https://monumenthobbies.com/?utm_source=google&utm_medium=cpc&utm_campaign=&utm_agid=138205513170&utm_term=monument%20hobbies&creative=631851995023&device=c&placement=&tw_source=google&tw_adid=631851995023&tw_campaign=18768495984&tw_source=google&tw_adid=631851995023&tw_campaign=18768495984&gad_source=1&gad_campaignid=18768495984&gbraid=0AAAAACQXYdXi9hN2aVNnP03J0i9p4EFlo&gclid=Cj0KCQiA6NTJBhDEARIsAB7QHD01pjju6FGaPai4_JQstZ7eJszY6aWFWri0m3jh0-V-v6E71nrYEWgaAlaBEALw_wcBIwata:https://www.iwata-airbrush.com/Steamforged Games:https://steamforged.com/?srsltid=AfmBOopoKOELFsQs1CO6N3WO3WFbCucNt64SrKwnl2Iw0cnS2R2Vtvt9Corvus Belli:https://corvusbelli.com/enThe Army Painter:https://thearmypainter.com/?gad_source=1&gad_campaignid=18666246906&gbraid=0AAAAAoMI_yqIfxFu0m_tpV7GsEJ3aJHiQ&gclid=Cj0KCQiA6NTJBhDEARIsAB7QHD0zY5ZGPbcHHQaGkwkqs7K7dW-hYm44LgiiZqB2k4jaUoYH5lDHjw8aAgcrEALw_wcBRed Grass Games:https://www.redgrasscreative.com/wet-palette/?gad_source=1&gad_campaignid=14907464779&gbraid=0AAAAACTSwfTgC5kZXU395_C2kRYkNJGnu&gclid=Cj0KCQiA6NTJBhDEARIsAB7QHD28c5qB5outWoQp1PVEMekjDplsfKZM8_6Sbxd_KjVXVem_5OPJxg4aAhcsEALw_wcBRelevant LinksGudnak:https://gudnak.com/Ninjon Video:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ISsz0cfGpy0Patreon Mini Pick - Campbell Trewinhttps://www.instagram.com/p/C4TvCY2ybEO/?igsh=MWVsNTJkMmpkb29jYg%3D%3D00:00 Start12:42 Preamble Ramble39:05 TUP Partners (Part One)41:07 Hobby Update53:44 Patreon Mini Critique59:23 TUP Partners (Part Two)01:03:52 Topic DiscussionSupport the showSupport the Show on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/trappedunderplasticSupport the Show with Merch: https://teespring.com/stores/trapped-under-plasticFollow Jon: https://www.youtube.com/ninjonFollow Scott: https://www.youtube.com/miniacJoin the FB group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/395664561386239/Listen to the audio versions: http://www.trappedunderplastic.com/

Desde Risk hasta Warhammer. ¿Alguna vez has querido jugar un juego y todos te rechazaron? ¿Te encantaría jugar Calabozos y Dragones (Dungeons & Dragons), pero no sabes como?Acá lo hablamos todo y más

Los dos grandes personajes de la Legión de los Portadores de la Palabra llegan a La Voz de Horus para entender mejor todo lo que se sabe sobre ellos tanto en sus inicios como en la Era Indomitus. Conoceremos a Erebus y Kor Phaeron desde su origen hasta hoy. En una nueva edición de nuestros programas dedicados a la vida y obra de grandes personajes de Warhammer 40k abordaremos a dos líderes muy diferentes, ambos fundamentales en la historia de Warhammer 40k y la Herejía de Horus y a la vez con presencia en la actual Era Indomitus. Es el momento de conocerlos en detalle, incluyendo todo su trasfondo actualizado gracias a novelas y publicaciones de GW. ¿Te gusta lo que hacemos y quieres apoyarnos y de paso participar en el sorteo mensual de 400€ en material de Warhammer 40k? Dale al botón de "Apoyar" en iVoox. Tendrás una participación por 2,99€, tres participaciones por 4,99€, siete participaciones por 9,99€, y otras siete por cada bloque de 9,99€. Más detalle en nuestra web, https://www.lavozdehorus.com/ 00:00:00 Presentación e introducción 00:07:50 Colchis, el origen de ambos 00:16:40 Erebus 00:46:31 Kor Phaeron Escúchanos mientras pintas minis o mientras sacas el perro a pasear. No importa el momento, pero cuenta con nosotros para ser tu programa semanal de referencia sobre Warhammer 40.000. Toda la música de este podcast está licenciada en Jamendo y Dark Fantasy Studio. El corte de fondo inicial es licencia Creative Commons de Royalty Free Kings utilizada con permiso de su autor Mark Petrie. Escucha el episodio completo en la app de iVoox, o descubre todo el catálogo de iVoox Originals

We dive into the three new Grotmas detachments we’ve seen so far.  They Astra Militarum, Chaos  Space Marines and the Blood Angels. You know we’re excited!  Will you see these … Read More

Send us a textPlease consider supporting LOOK OUT, SIR! on PATREON, which occasionally features fancy EXCLUSIVE CONTENT: https://www.patreon.com/lookoutsir40k We also have MERCHANDISE available to purchase from Rev-Level: https://www.rev-level.com/lookoutsir40k  LOOK OUT, SIR!'S SOCIAL MEDIA LINKS:• Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/lookoutsir/ • Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/lookoutsir40k/ • YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/lookoutsir40k  PHIL'S SOCIAL MEDIA LINKS:• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/beyondthetabletop/ • YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCAxBqN_9PHjajPLoIKKNi6w  DAN'S SOCIAL MEDIA LINK:• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/i.r.invested.in.unexpected/  Thanks very much for taking the time to listen and by extension support our podcast. We hugely appreciate it and hope that you enjoy the show.

THIS EPISODE Ludlov finally meets his true enemy up close... ----more---- ABOUT THE STORY The Hounds of Hübschdorf (formerly called 'Grauwald's Game') is an epic fantasy audiobook by Audio Epics that has been released on Halloween, since it has serious dark fantasy and grimdark vibes. This brand new Witch Hunter Tale is the direct prequel to Witch Hunter. If you like a dark adventure story you'll probably enjoy this grim journey in the original fantasy setting of Hruda, inspired by everything we love: RPG settings like the Old World from Warhammer fantasy, eighties fantasy movies and J.R.R. Tolkien's Middle-earth (amongst others).   PLOT SUMMARY When three Witch Hunters fail to return from a routine investigation, Master Ludlov and Initiate Tolfmann find themselves in a small village near the woods. While investigating the strange disappearance of their Brethren, it becomes obvious the mayor is not so keen on their arrival, and the villagers seem to prefer the distraction of the Graunacht festivities to their nosing around. When their inquest reveals a dark mystery involving evil magic and undead, Ludlov faces the true cause of the threat in a place more disturbing than he could have imagined.   WANT TO SUPPORT US? Listen to our other stories on this channel. Like, share, comment and talk about us on social media: @AudioEpics

Gobbo, Emmy, and Drew are back in the Under the Hive of Madness studio to continue their coverage of Khorne's Mortal Champion Kharne the Betrayer! Under the Hive of Madness is a Warhammer 40k Podcast diving into the Horror and Grimdark elements of the setting, so expect some adult themes, adult language, and more than a handful of Khorney Jokes!“Skulls for the Skull Throne!” Email the show! ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠UndertheHiveofMadness@gmail.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Join us today on Discord! ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Under the Hive of Madness⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠MERCH!⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Become a ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Patron⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠. Find our cast through ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠LinkTree⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Underthehiveofmadness.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

In ep 150 of “How Do You Say That?!” sponsored by britishvoiceover.co.uk, Tim Bick joins Sam and Mark to talk about wildlife documentary reads, and whether we're so used to hearing Attenborough or Nat Geo styles that it's difficult to come up with anything new. We work out how intimate should an intimate read be, and how big should a big read be? We hark back 15 years to the comfortable announcer style that's so out of vogue these days - and ask what it is that a corporate film should really sound like. In the wildcards we get angry, get on Insta and bark our way into a new language!Our VO question this week is all about letting your client hear the loopback on a take in a directed session.Get involved! Have you got a Wildcard suggestion that we should try or an idea for the show? Send it to us via Mark or Sam's social media or email it directly to podcast@britishvoiceover.co.ukScript 1Along the edge of the sea ice, walruses forage for clams buried in the mud — their whiskers sweeping like sensors across the seabed. Ringed, bearded, and harp seals glide through cracks in the ice, surfacing for air where the water meets frozen sky.Above us — the Arctic's apex predator. The polar bear. It depends entirely on this frozen platform to hunt seals. As the ice retreats earlier each year, that balance — between predator and prey, ice and ocean — begins to fracture.Script 2Presenting Empiricon Stewart Racing.Two teamwork powerhouses focused around the same goal - to unleash the full potential of a legendary race team.Empiricon creates software that transforms teamwork and makes possible together what would be impossible alone.And today, they join forces with an icon of Formula 1 to usher in a new era of racing. Together, we will advance teamwork in ways never-before-seen within the greatest team sport on earth.This is Empiricon Stewart Racing.We'd love your feedback - and if you listen on Apple Podcasts or Spotify, hit the follow button today!**Listen to all of our podcasts here - you can also watch on YouTube, or say to your smart speaker "Play How Do You Say That?!"About our guest: Tim Bick's distinctive blend of warmth, intelligence, and authority has made him a trusted voice for global brands like Fiat, Microsoft and Pfizer, and broadcast networks including the BBC, Netflix and Apple TV. In addition to national TV campaigns and documentaries, Tim has brought humanity, humour and depth to multiple roles in video games such as Warhammer 40,000: Rogue Trader, Nioh 3 and Smite. He can also be heard by the neighbours, teaching his dog to sing. Tim's Website Tim's Facebook page @timbickvo on Instagram Tim on YouTube Resources:

Subscribe to patreon.com/aow40k for part 2.

We're talking… Drake and Kim Kardashian playing Dungeons & Dragons, Henry Cavill's Warhammer obsession, stressful Lego builds, The Simpsons and Friends golden eras, Back To The Future on the What Went Wrong podcast, Sloth from the Goonies, Forrest Gump in Philadelphia, Grace's big birthday party, a unicorn cake disaster, Tom Fletcher's songs for the Paddington musical, a Royal Variety Performance, the brilliant Nick Helm and winter work-out struggles. For questions or comments, please email us at wolfowlpod@gmail.com - we'd love to hear from you. Instagram - @wolfowlpod TikTok - @wolfowlpodcast YouTube - www.youtube.com/WolfandOwlPodcast Merch & Mailing List - https://wolfandowlpod.com A Mighty Ranga Production For sales and sponsorship enquiries: HELLO@KEEPITLIGHTMEDIA.COM Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week on That Peter Crouch Podcast, the lads are joined by musician, Liverpool fan and long-time friend of the pod Miles Kane for an episode full of nostalgia, chaos and unbelievable storytelling. From the early days knocking about in Belsize Park to creating his brand-new album Sunlight in the Shadows with Dan Auerbach of the Black Keys, Miles lifts the lid on the madness, the music and the moments that shaped him.We get into FIFA soundtracks, Sky Sports montages and why football and music share the same obsessive mindset. Miles also tells the incredible story of how his childhood hero Roberto Baggio inspired one of his most emotional tracks — and how that song led him all the way to Baggio's house in Italy for one of the most surreal lunches of his life.There's backstage mayhem with Arctic Monkeys, broken ribs in five-a-side, fashion eras gone wrong, and a whole lot of love for the city of Liverpool. It's a proper journey through the highs, the lessons and the moments that stay with you forever.Chumbawamba 00:00 – Blockbuster nostalgia & video shop memories04:00 – VHS rentals, Soho shops & Warhammer confusion06:00 – Crouchy's weekend: Andy Carroll hat trick & The Greatest Showman08:11 – Tribute to Billy Bonds & West Ham memories09:37 – Predictions league: Sid pulls away11:49 – Palace V United reaction & Amorim tunnel reaction12:02 – Leeds v Liverpool preview (Paddy Power's Big Weekend)14:33 – Are Liverpool turning a corner?18:24 – Bet builder decisions & odds boost20:26 – Brighton v Villa preview & the ‘horny draw' debate22:31 – Sponsored segment (Haier) & discount code24:33 – Miles Kane arrives on the pod25:27 – Recording the new album in Nashville with Dan Auerbach31:06 – The Roberto Baggio song story begins34:01 – Miles meets Baggio in Italy37:10 – The aftermath: calling his mum & crying in the car41:05 – Arctic Monkeys Roundhouse story & mid-gig cameo44:13 – Why Miles quit five-a-side after breaking ribs & elbows54:00 – Gig crowds, global touring & life post-album release01:00:25 – The live musical performance & reaction from the lads 01:10:15 – Susie Dent breaks down the surname origin ‘Tancock' 01:14:41 – Listener message: she becomes “Mrs Corner” & the lads lose itFollow our Clips page https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLNBLB3xr3LyiyAkhZEtiAA For more Peter Crouch: Twitter - https://twitter.com/petercrouch Therapy Crouch - https://www.youtube.com/@thetherapycrouch For more Chris Stark Twitter - https://twitter.com/Chris_StarkInstagram - https://www.instagram.com/chrisstark/For more Steve Sidwell Twitter - https://twitter.com/sjsidwell Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/stevesidwell14 #PeterCrouch #ThatPeterCrouchPodcast Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Pre-Christmas Shenanigans. "Good Morning Toy World" Your Source for Semi-Premium Adult Related Toy Talk.

We have Sam Pope of Team USA this week to talk all things Warhammer, Victrix Guard and state of the game, along with your usual assortment of chat from the hosts about our weeks.   ➡ Support the work we do:   / statcheck   ➡ Check out the Meta Data Dashboard: https://www.stat-check.com/the-meta ➡ Stat Check coaching: https://www.stat-check.com/coaching ➡ Stat Check Merch: https://bit.ly/statcheckmerch ➡ Check out our sponsor the Red Dragon (Stat Check Patrons get 15% off the entire store) at https://red-dragon.ca/ ➡ Check out our sponsor Saltire Games: https://www.saltiregames.co.uk/ ➡ Shop amazing WTC terrain at Weyland-Yutani and save 5% with the code "STATCHECK5": https://www.weyland-yutani-inc.com/ ➡ Looking for GW-style US Open terrain? Check out J15 Games (10% off with code STATCHECK) at https://www.etsy.com/shop/j15games   #warhammer40k #warhammer #wh40k #competitivewarhammer #statcheck

In this Snack episode, Ophira catches up with author and storyteller Katy Strange, who talks about the very specific chaos of raising two tweens while publishing her debut novel The Manly Man of God. Katy explains how her book's bold, saint-like cover—complete with a mysteriously floating eggplant—has sparked confusion among some readers, including a man at her book launch who sincerely asked if the story involved a farmers' market subplot. She and Ophira dig into the megachurch culture that inspired the book, including the time a stranger on a Vancouver bus tried to flirt with Katy only to pivot into trying to convert her, not realizing she understood church history well enough to corner him with questions about communal living. Katy also shares how writing the novel began during nap-time marathons, how a women's business incubator with drop-in childcare became her creative lifeline, and how her family's “Yes Day” tradition has evolved from toddlers eating crackers on the couch to tweens burning through budgets on Shake Shack, fancy haircuts, and sneaker hunts. And at the end, Katy describes how her 13-year-old now treats Warhammer figurines as a non-negotiable expense, as well as expensive haircuts from the mall salon that is covered in ring lights.

A little bit of a nostalgia episode especially in light of a few recent discussions about what's coming in the comp, do we need a 2nd edition yet and what's in store for TOW in 2026[0:04:08] Intro[0:09:20] Editions Review Part 1[1:02:30] Patreon Shoutouts[1:05:46] Editions Review Part 2[1:39:05] Patreon Questions[1:59:08] News (Trollslayer Book Rerelease)[2:01:50] Andrew's Hobby and a little OWR Sizzle to close out the episodeLucent Art Light - https://gameenvy.net/lucent-art-light/gommo's Shaggoth - Clay beast creations - https://www.myminifactory.com/object/3d-print-ancient-centigon-207675Support the ShowJoin the Patreon -https://patreon.com/oldworldfanaticsShop Old World @ Element Games - https://elementgames.co.uk/wargames-and-miniatures-by-game/warhammer-the-old-worldLinks and ShoutoutsOld World Rankings - https://oldworldrankings.com/auAustralian Discord Server - https://discord.gg/yYaTG5svBVFollow UsYouTube - https://www.youtube.com/@oldworldfanaticsBluesky - https://bsky.app/profile/oldworldfanatics.comInstagram - https://www.instagram.com/oldworldfanaticsThreads - https://www.threads.net/@oldworldfanaticsEmail - oldworldfanatics@gmail.comHuge thanks to our monthly supporters!

Send us a textWelcome to Guilders-Ford Radio, a Necromunda podcast broadcasting from the East Gate Docks of Hive Primus (via Guildford Games Club, Surrey, UK).Team GFR are starting Season 4 strong with yet another special guest - returning friend of the show Constantin Gerlach, fresh from his most recent CoriusCon03 event in Berlin, Germany.  We dive into all the details of the event, including the international crowd of attendees, fantastic terrain, bespoke campaign resources and some chronic FOMO from the team for missing out.As correctly predicted, Warhammer dropped a wealth of World Championship previews straight after our last episode, and we dive into all the forthcoming Necromunda releases. Rounding out the episode, we do our usual hobby round up, and take a moment to marvel at the truly international Guilders-Ford Radio community!We'd like to take the opportunity to thank all our listeners who have chosen to support us on Patreon & Buzzsprout - your contributions help us make a better show!• Flow • Denny Wright • Stefan Sahlin  • Matt Miler  • Matti Puh  • Nick McVett  •Warhammer in the Dark  •From_Somewhere • Alfonso  • The Traitor • Johnny DeVille • Stephan B • Jeff Nelson • Lankydiceroller • Morskul • Beau  • Justin Clark • Dr.Toe • Mikael Livas • Josh Reynolds • StandStab • ChestDrain • Scott Spieker • Tucker Steel • Shaughn • Stewart Young • Goatincoat  • Jason • Joseph Serrani • Billy  • Phil • Stephen Griffiths  • Søren D • Spruewhisperer • Kevin Fowler • Scott Spieker • Andy Tabor  • TheMichaelNimmo • Tucker Steel  • Dave Shearman  • Shaughn  • Stewart Young •Damien Davis • Wayne Jeffrey   •  Frawgenstein • Matthey Mulcahy   • William Payne •Thomas Laycock • Stephen Livingston • Tyler Anderson • McGobbo • Jed Tearle • Gene Archibald • James Marsden • John Haynes • Ryan Taylor • Yuki van Elzelingen  • Dick Linehan • Rhinoxrifter • Shawn Hall  • Eric McKenzie  • Paul Shaw  • Jenifer • Drew Williams  • Greg Miller • Andy Farrell  • Nate Combrink •  Don Johnson • Michael Yule • Joe Roberts • TheRedWolf • Lukasz Jainski • Aaron Vissers • One Punch Orlock (Tom) • Matt Price • ShnubutsSupport the showHelp us make better content, and download free community resources!www.patreon.com/guildersfordradioAny comments, questions or corrections? We'd love to hear from you! Join the Guilders-Ford Radio community over at;https://linktr.ee/guildersfordradiowww.instagram.com/guildersfordradiowww.facebook.com/guildersfordradioGuildersFordRadio@Gmail.com ** Musical Attribution - Socket Rocker by (Freesound - BaDoink) **

In Episode 270 of The Independent Characters, we bring our monumental exploration of Titans to a close by venturing beyond the Imperium to the heretical, alien, and utterly bizarre god-engines that stalk the galaxy. In this second part of our two-part series, we delve into the corrupted Chaos Titans of the Dark Mechanicum - twisted reflections of their loyalist kin whose Machine Spirits have long since merged with the daemonic will of the Warp. From Iconoclasts and Infernals to the infamous Daemon Engines of the Traitor Legios, we examine how the powers of the Warp reshape these once-holy engines into entities of madness and malice. But the galaxy's gods of war are not limited to humanity's machines. We turn our attention to the Xenos Titans, the elegant, wraithbone Aeldari Phantoms and Revenants, the ramshackle yet terrifying Ork Gargants, and even the living, bio-engineered horrors of the Tyranids that serve as their own monstrous equivalents. Each race has its own vision of what it means to command destruction on a titanic scale, and their designs reveal as much about their cultures as their weapons do about their wars. On the tabletop, we explore how these colossal war engines appear across games like Warhammer 40,000, Horus Heresy, Adeptus Titanicus, and Legions Imperialis, comparing their aesthetics, rules, and battlefield impact. Whether it's a Gargant's laughter echoing through the smoke, an Aeldari Titan striding like a ghost through reality, or a corrupted Warlord roaring praise to the Dark Gods, each represents a unique expression of power at its most absolute. We hope you enjoy this episode! Time Stamps: 0:00:00 - Show Intro, Elite Choice, Hobby Progress 0:26:00 - Engines of The Apocalypse (Part 2): Xenos & Chaos Titans - Part 1 1:06:10 - Engines of The Apocalypse (Part 2): Xenos & Chaos Titans - Part 2 1:41:35 - Final Thoughts and show closing Relevant Links: The Independent Characters Patreon Tablewar! - SPONSOR Herrick Games & Hobbies - SPONSOR Goonhammer War on The Shore 2026 Adepticon Games Workshop The Black Library  

Paul spent some time last week at Pax Unplugged and we talk about it from a Warhammer perspective and getting new people into the hobby.  Then we talk a little … Read More

Send us a textIn EPISODE TWO HUNDRED TWENTY-SEVEN (227) of the LOOK OUT, SIR! 40K PODCAST, “LEVIATHAN 4: DEVOUR HARDER”, Dan and Phil discuss the various events of the 4th Tyrannic War as told in the pages of both the Leviathan 40K Rulebook and the Tyrannic War 40K Crusade book.This episode marks the first instalment of our “THE ROAD TO 500 WORLDS” series of 10th Edition 40K lore-focused podcasts, where we aim to furnish our listeners with insights into the many narrative developments of 10th Edition Warhammer 40,000, in hopes of providing greater context for what's going on ahead of the release of the (presently) upcoming 500 Worlds Campaign Event(s).We hope you find this both helpful and enjoyable. Cheers very much to BOBKNIGHT of AUDIBLE USA fame (despite actually being from Finland) for giving us a lovely 5 STAR REVIEW. You are the best of peoples, and we appreciate your support. Thank you! Please consider supporting LOOK OUT, SIR! on PATREON, which occasionally features fancy EXCLUSIVE CONTENT: https://www.patreon.com/lookoutsir40k We also have MERCHANDISE available to purchase from Rev-Level: https://www.rev-level.com/lookoutsir40k  LOOK OUT, SIR!'S SOCIAL MEDIA LINKS:• Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/lookoutsir/ • Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/lookoutsir40k/ • YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/lookoutsir40k  PHIL'S SOCIAL MEDIA LINKS:• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/beyondthetabletop/ • YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCAxBqN_9PHjajPLoIKKNi6w  DAN'S SOCIAL MEDIA LINK:• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/i.r.invested.in.unexpected/  Thanks very much for taking the time to listen and by extension support our podcast. We hugely appreciate it and hope that you enjoy the show.

Ludlov learns about Tolfmann's secret as the two continue their adventure beyond the borders of the Red Circle... ----more---- ABOUT THE STORY The Hounds of Hübschdorf (formerly called 'Grauwald's Game') is an epic fantasy audiobook by Audio Epics that has been released on Halloween, since it has serious dark fantasy and grimdark vibes. This brand new Witch Hunter Tale is the direct prequel to Witch Hunter. If you like a dark adventure story you'll probably enjoy this grim journey in the original fantasy setting of Hruda, inspired by everything we love: RPG settings like the Old World from Warhammer fantasy, eighties fantasy movies and J.R.R. Tolkien's Middle-earth (amongst others).   PLOT SUMMARY When three Witch Hunters fail to return from a routine investigation, Master Ludlov and Initiate Tolfmann find themselves in a small village near the woods. While investigating the strange disappearance of their Brethren, it becomes obvious the mayor is not so keen on their arrival, and the villagers seem to prefer the distraction of the Graunacht festivities to their nosing around. When their inquest reveals a dark mystery involving evil magic and undead, Ludlov faces the true cause of the threat in a place more disturbing than he could have imagined.   WANT TO SUPPORT US? Listen to our other stories on this channel. Like, share, comment and talk about us on social media: @AudioEpics

Warhammer Meta Chasers is a weekly competitive Warhammer 40k hype show.  We run down some of the biggest and best events coming up this weekend where we discuss Warhammer 40k Factions in attendance and highlight army lists from some of the top ranked players around the globe. We talk about what the meta is, what it will be and how you can stack up against it. The show is hosted by Paul Murphy, Adam Camilleri, and Dustin Henshaw. The show runs LIVE every week on YouTube around 9pm EST every Thursday.  We sincerely invite you to join us in chat if you can make it.  The show is pushed to the Podcast aggregators soon after!  We have an amazing chat community.  Check out our Patreon here: https://www.patreon.com/WarhammerMetaChasers Join us live each and every Thursday on YouTube and join in our awesome chat community. Want to message the show another way?  Hit up Paul on twitter @warmaster_tpm or on Instagram @fightswithdice

On this week's episode of Trapped Under Plastic, Scott and Jon discuss the worst advice they have ever heard for the hobby!Support the Show on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/trappedunderplasticSupport the Show with Merch: https://teespring.com/stores/trapped-under-plasticFollow Jon: https://www.youtube.com/ninjonFollow Scott: https://www.youtube.com/miniacJoin the FB group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/395664561386239/Listen to the audio versons: http://www.trappedunderplastic.com/On patreon, we offer our patron's the ability to submit topics for us to discuss during a podcast, you get an extended version of the podcast, and you can submit miniatures for us to critique during an episode!TUP Partners:Red Grass Game:https://www.redgrasscreative.com/wet-palette/?gad_source=1&gad_campaignid=14907464779&gbraid=0AAAAACTSwfRfVEfJ7UOT6sXBRDQSiqz9B&gclid=CjwKCAiA_orJBhBNEiwABkdmjMn3V6peF-Q1Hm-plP1fZpuYjdr4ZD3r8DfAU6HFkkJVo56hy7xGTxoCUn4QAvD_BwESteamforged Games:https://steamforged.com/?srsltid=AfmBOor-qUe6-W-iIJkcMFNe3cVRlKwu1bVZtjWizsAaSz01dynJE1q8Corvus Belli:https://corvusbelli.com/en/The Army Painter:https://thearmypainter.com/?gad_source=1&gad_campaignid=18666246906&gbraid=0AAAAAoMI_yrOPMbOpgW2zBelUEYmvwhyr&gclid=CjwKCAiA_orJBhBNEiwABkdmjJQ72HYq2nYS4nI4UNtbwSyOgp--WnufvHmgVW9-m7LC-WnPnpyF_xoCPOsQAvD_BwECobalt Keep:https://www.cobaltkeep.com/?utm_source=google&utm_medium=wix-smart-campaign&utm_campaign=google-ads-campaign-2025-2-3-8cd51965&gad_source=1&gad_campaignid=22191596768&gbraid=0AAAAA-QQP6w-cN_e-2ayBr2jAH60ELo3T&gclid=CjwKCAiA_orJBhBNEiwABkdmjLLLLObSv2S3HgAu6a_FwyySzAsIsKTiDv5cUCkByGb_NCP5wJ_lwhoCq2oQAvD_BwEMonument Hobbies:https://monumenthobbies.com/?utm_source=google&utm_medium=cpc&utm_campaign=&utm_agid=138205513170&utm_term=monument%20hobbies&creative=687964676591&device=c&placement=&tw_source=google&tw_adid=687964676591&tw_campaign=18768495984&tw_source=google&tw_adid=687964676591&tw_campaign=18768495984&gad_source=1&gad_campaignid=18768495984&gbraid=0AAAAACQXYdWG1MDnXUJQeFWV18dVP967O&gclid=CjwKCAiA_orJBhBNEiwABkdmjNQY8YEG4C5d1Qf02ToUmH-qHKnhS6a59LylS5vY-4oIcGzBxV6SBRoCxb8QAvD_BwEIwata:https://www.iwata-airbrush.com/Game Envy:https://gameenvy.net/Relevant LinksJon's Nut Obsession:https://www.cashews.com/Patreon Mini Pick - Cole Westmoreland:https://www.instagram.com/p/C4txgkaLDxO/?igsh=enJxM2oyMGc4em8500:00 Start01:25 Preamble Ramble59:20 TUP Partners (Part One)01:01:22 Hobby Update01:21:16 Patreon Mini Critique01:34:01 TUP Partners (Part Two)01:36:23 Topic DiscussionSupport the showSupport the Show on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/trappedunderplasticSupport the Show with Merch: https://teespring.com/stores/trapped-under-plasticFollow Jon: https://www.youtube.com/ninjonFollow Scott: https://www.youtube.com/miniacJoin the FB group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/395664561386239/Listen to the audio versions: http://www.trappedunderplastic.com/