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How can you encourage your husband to be more involved and take a more active role in parenting? Jason Kreidman, the founder of Dad University, gives us some powerful advice for getting and keeping your husband engaged. ABOUT HUNTER CLARKE-FIELDS: Hunter Clarke-Fields is the host Mindful Parenting Podcast (Top 0.5% podcast ), global speaker, number 1 bestselling author of “Raising Good Humans” and “Raising Good Humans Every Day,” Mindfulness Meditation teacher and creator of the Mindful Parenting Course and Teacher Training. Find more podcasts, Hunter's books, blog posts, free resources, and more at MindfulMamaMentor.com. Discover your Unique-To-You Podcast Playlist at mindfulmamamentor.com/quiz/ We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: /mindfulmamamentor.com/mindful-mama-podcast-sponsors/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
In this episode, Lori Sims, founder of Nacho Kids Nacho Parenting, interviews Jason Kreidman with Dad University. Jason struggled with the transition from being single to a married dad with kids. He found himself overwhelmed and stressed out with the increase in responsibilities and demands. He was taking his stress out on his young children and recognized that he needed to change the way he was doing things in order to be a successful father. In this episode, we discuss the following: Being a recovering yeller Taking responsibility for self Empathy Parenting out of guilt Expectations Nacho Kids Academy Nacho Parenting Success Story: “My attorney recommended the Nacho Academy to me. It completely changed how I interacted with my ex and saved me a ton of money in attorney's fees! Thank you Nacho creators!” ~ R. M.
Jason Kreidman is the creator of Dad University, and online school for dads. He is also an internet marketer and father of 2. This episode is going to be especially valuable for two types of people - anyone looking to be a better father, and anyone who has ever wanted to make content and put it out into the world. We cover a lot of ground, including: 0210 how your career informs your parenting 0400 how to juggle career and family life / work-life harmony 0643 tips for self-care 0905 not having too many hobbies and enjoying your work 1020 ranking your priorities 1220 making time for family 1425 self-compassion 1712 Dad University 1909 wanting to become a better father 2008 researching content 2118 putting your ego aside when making content 2530 fears putting out your first piece of content 2830 dealing with criticism 2950 feel the fear and do it anyway 3140 how to get views 3550 bad parenting advice 3748 advice for someone that wants to start making content 3913 advice for former self 4040 advice for new father And much more! EPISODE LINKS https://www.daduniversity.com/ https://www.youtube.com/@DadUniversity https://www.instagram.com/daduniv/ https://www.linkedin.com/in/kreidman/ SHOW LINKS: contact: successfulworkingparents@gmail.com Website: https://workingparentspod.carrd.co/ Linktree: https://linktr.ee/successfulworkingparents Musical credit: Hippie Beatnix (ID 1913) by Lobo Loco CC-by-nc-nd
In this episode, we're diving deep into the often-overlooked phase known as the fourth trimester - the postpartum period. In this eye-opening conversation, Dr. Kristal Lau, a physician, postpartum wellness consultant, and author of Postpartum 30, shares personal stories from her own postpartum, sheds light on why this time can be uniquely challenging for military families, and educates us on the unmatched expectations couples often have when entering this significant phase. Tune in to discover how the postpartum period impacts mothers and their marriages, whether you have children, are planning to have them, or simply wish to better support and understand mothers during this transformative time. We're exploring: What you need to know about the postpartum period (and what “normal” and “abnormal” things to expect) Real talk on postpartum depression The fascinating changes that occur in a mother's brain during this phase One powerful way to decrease resentment in your marriage after having kids What most people don't talk about when it comes to the postpartum period Preparing and planning for your postpartum period More resources for the postpartum period: 3 Essential Postpartum Changes That No One Really Talks About And What To Do About Them: www.mamaswingwoman.com/pplist1 Dad University: https://www.daduniversity.com/ Military Birth Resource Network & Postpartum Coalition: https://www.militarybirthresourcenetwork.org/ Postpartum Wellness Consultant and Owner of Mama's Wing Woman Author of Postpartum 30 Host of 'The Postpartum Wellness Show' on YouTube and Podcasts For more support during deployment, check out my new course, In The Trenches: Mastering Deployment for a Stronger Marriage: https://lindsaycavanagh.com/in-the-trenches Connect with me for a FREE Military Marriage Breakthrough Call: https://marriedtomilitary.satoriapp.com/offers/236651-military-marriage-breakthrough-call Follow me on Instagram so you don't miss a thing! https://www.instagram.com/marriedtomilitary/ Continue the conversation in my private Facebook group Married to Military: https://www.facebook.com/groups/449431269700869
They say that any man can make a child but it takes a special man to be a father. When we have a child, it is important that our lives adjust to support this special new life. Jason Kreidman, founder of Dad University, struggled with the transition from single man to married dad with kids. […] The post Jason Kreidman, Lessons from Dad University appeared first on LillianMcDermott.com.
Did you know that being a present father with your kids is the most life-changing thing you can do for them? Whether you are still married or not, you will always be a father to your kids! Learning to be a present father will impact your kids and grandkids for the rest of their lives. Join me today on the Man of Honor Podcast with Ed McGlasson and Coach Jeff Springer - A powerful husband, father, and grandfather. A public school educator and coach for 34 years and coached hundreds of young people who didn't have fathers in their story. Jeff is also the Founder of SUIT UP MINISTRIES and Dad University, which equips men to be devoted, powerful fathers. 00:00: Opening 01:26: Introduction 02:26: Welcome, Dr. Jeffrey Springer 02:57: What did God do in your life that made you the man you are? 10:50: God doesn't waste the hurt in our lives. 14:11: Dads carry a prophetic-like responsibility 17:46: Needing spiritual fathers 22:22: The "if it's going to be, it's up to me" philosophy. 26:10: What have you learned about reaching these kids 28:22: Our children learn from what we do 34:33: When families are healthy, society is healthy. 38:09: Preparing for when we aren't there anymore 46:00: Prayer 48:12: Remember, it's never too late Suit Up Ministries: https://suitupministries.org/home Video Suit Ministries: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1hCCLnaIRtg Brand new book: #dadprep: Preparation for Legacy: 52-Week Devotional - https://a.co/d/3gbsXND
There are so many good Dads out there so I want to cover this topic carefully. The fact is that I have so many questions from moms asking how to get their husbands more involved, and to help out more. So many complain that their partners aren't equal partners and that leads to resentment, frustration and anger. If your husband is disengaged in parenting, what do you do?My guest, Jason Kreidman, the founder of “Dad University” is here to give us a dad's perspective on how to approach your hubby to ask for what you want and need…so he'll want to do it!Jason says we need to start by communicating our wants and needs with them. No expectations mind reading allowed! No saying “he should know this!” Men are defined by their accomplishments and they need to be appreciated for them (us too!), so Jason suggests we give them a constant dose of appreciation and the result? They are going to want to do what makes us happy. You can put this to the test yourself with these suggestions and the others Jason explains in our discussion. In this episode we talk about why dads can become uninvolved, disengaged and unhelpful, and what we can do to change that. For Jason's "Tips to Get Your Husband More Involved”, you can download it from the Parent Toolbox. www.parent-toolbox.comAbout Jason KreidmanJason Kreidman is the founder of Dad University, an educational company dedicated to helping dads go from overwhelmed and confused to calm and confident fathers. Through his courses, YouTube videos, and social media, he is working to improve the lives of dads around the world.Social Media:Website: https://www.daduniversity.comLinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/company/dad-university/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/daduniversity/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/daduniv/Twitter: https://twitter.com/DadUnivYouTube: https://www.youtube.com/daduniversityThanks for listening! For more on Robbin, her work and free resources, keep reading! READY FOR YOUR FAMILY CHECK UP CALL? If you're feeling burnt out by bad behavior, worn down from constant battles and bickering and you've struggled to get the cooperation, respect and obedience you want from your kids, I've been there too. It might be time to learn new tools (that you've never been taught) to help you get your kids to listen to you, build teamwork, and grow the harmony in your home. click the link below to schedule a time to see if we're a fit to work together inside of my Parenting for Connection Program. https://parentingforconnection.as.me/Checkupcall FREE GUIDE FOR PARENTS OF STRONG-WILLED KIDS: “How to Turn a NO into Cooperation” go to www.strongwilledkids.com It means so much to me that you listened to my podcast! If you resonate with my message and would like my personal help in your parenting journey, I'd love to talk to you. Please visit my website to book a call with me where we can talk about your parenting frustrations and I'll share how I can help you. www.parentingforconnection.com The intention for my show is to build a community of parents that can have open and honest conversations about parenting without judgement or criticism. We all deserve access to help and support when we need it most. I honour each parent and their path towards becoming the best parent they can be. My hope is to inspire more parents to consider the practice of Peaceful Parenting.If you know somebody who would benefit from this message, or would be an awesome addition to our community, please share it using the social media buttons on this page.Do you have some feedback or questions about this episode? Leave a note in the comment section below!Leave a reviewI appreciate every bit of feedback...
Conflicts at home seem spicier than they do at work. Today Andy sits down with Jason Kreidman of Dad University to talk about how we can manage conflicts at home. Jason is a self-proclaimed “reformed” yeller and will share how we can resolve problems in a less confrontational way with our family. For more on Jason and Dad University: https://www.daduniversity.com/ Protect your home and your family with Andy's best-selling book, Home Security: The Secure Dad's Guide. Free video - How to Spot Criminals Casing Your Home: https://youtu.be/0qpubOOiWvo Join the Conversation with the Official Telegram Channel of The Secure Dad. More from The Secure Dad: Website | Books | Merch
In today's episode, I talk with Jason Kriedman, founder of DadUniversity, the one-of-a-kind education platform for dads, helping them go from overwhelmed and confused to a calm and confident parent. Through his courses, videos, and social media, he is working to improve the lives of dads around the world. You can learn more about DadUniversity here - https://www.daduniversity.com/a/2147518616/XQu5rFTn. ► Subscribe to my YouTube channel here: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCoFMYuRYxQS6LR10bqneIOA?sub_confirmation=1 Get your copy of my book here - https://amzn.to/2LFw3l0 Join my FREE Facebook group where we talk about all things parenting - https://www.facebook.com/groups/powerfulparentingfortodayskids/ Follow me online here: Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/ErinTaylorOfficial/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/erintaylor_ma/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/erin-taylor-5706bb1/ --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/powerful-parenting/support
On this episode of the Fresh Start Family Show - Terry and Wendy have an insightful conversation with a long-time friend and founder of Dad University, Jason Kreidman. Jason discusses his journey through parenthood, which paved his way to founding an educational company dedicated to helping other dads gain confidence in their parenting. The focus of this conversation is the #1 tool for parents to add to their parenting toolkit … empathy and how a shift in perspective can truly save relationships and build connected families. For more information, go to: www.freshstartfamilyonline.com/133
Dad University: Lead from the Front is my open letter to my fellow fathers. There are a lot of books, shows and other material on How to be a Dad, How to be a good dad; fatherhood explained and so many more. So what could I add to the conversation? That is a fair question. Here is the what I want to contribute, the simple truth that every father will eventually learn and I have learned from not only being a dad but 20 plus years of working with kids. Kids see the way you live your life and emulate it, irregardless of what you have to say. Hear me clearly. What you say to your child has very little to do with how your child will live. Dads life, the example you set in the way you live is what defines their future. If your words match that and they are in alignment with your life then that helps compound what you are teaching them. When they don't, how you act will always win-out over what you say. Men, here are things you need to model to your child and it doesn't matter if you just found out you are going to be a father or you are a grandfather. Dads life is key. Fatherhood isn't easy; but you can do it! Men, lead from the front. The video version of this show is available https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jtV6U0NbGjE
Pregnancy is a unique experience. Unless you have gone through it, it is sort of difficult to understand all of the different things going on. You have your own emotional roller coaster and stress, you have a partner with all of the things she is going through....and life as you know it, is going to change soon. I know when we were going through pregnancy, I felt a little lost. Sure friends and family members offered some advice. It was such a strange experience and I had never been around kids very much, let alone understand what I was about to go through. In this podcast, we are going over some pregnancy tips for dads. It's my advice for you expecting fathers. I do hope they are valuable. Be sure to leave some feedback in the comments section below.
Being a new dad is like nothing else. It's unique. It brings out emotions and shows sides of you that you didn't even know you had. There are new dad books and even other new dad videos that provide great advice and tips. We have a lot of episodes on this podcast that are hopefully helpful.
Being a teen dad is certainly not an easy situation. You may be feeling scared and stressed that your life is about to change. The questions what do I do? And how am I going to handle this? Are probably coming up pretty frequently. In this podcast, we are talking about specific things you can do to get yourself ready to be a teen dad. How can you prepare yourself and be a great father to your child.
Some men have great role models as fathers while some are very sure they want to be a different father than they have. I consider myself pretty lucky with my father. Now having my own son, I get to pass along some of the same things my father passed along to me. In this podcast, I want to talk about how to be a good father to a son. What are the attributes that make a good father? Is there really a roadmap? I think there is.
It feels so good to never had made those first-time father mistakes. I didn't leave the house without diapers and then the child goes to the bathroom all over the place, forget to strap the car seat in, or put on my son's clothes backward. Glad I never did that stuff. Reality check...we all make mistakes as first-time fathers and we make a lot of them. In this video, I'm going to go over 8 common mistakes made by first-time fathers. This way you get to learn what to not do.
For my entire professional career, I have been an entrepreneur. Coming out of graduate school, I got involved with my mother's business (she was a very successful author and seminar speaker), and shortly after that started my first real company. I'm not counting the business I started one summer in elementary school as a real company. Then I had a series of companies that I had either started or been involved with for nearly 25 years. Along the way, I got married and had 2 kids. I've learned a lot from that time. Both what to do and certainly what not to do. In this episode, I wanted to talk about what it's like to be an entrepreneur dad and offer some tips on how to make it work and maybe some things to avoid. There is actually a term Fatherpreneur. You might be an entrepreneur who is thinking about being a father....or you are already a father and thinking about starting your own business. Either way, I hope some of these tips are valuable for you.
If you are first time dad, you might be feeling a little new dad anxiety. Whether your baby is on the way or you just had it, some thoughts and feelings you have never experienced before are coming up. In this episode, I am going to touch on a few of the most common things that cause new dad anxiety, and then we will go over a few ways that can help you overcome it.
Mindfulness is paying attention to our thoughts and feelings without judging them. It's being aware of surroundings and our state of being. It can be as simple as just focusing on the present moment. Not dwelling about what happened in the past or worrying about the future. You are focused on the now. For my own children, practicing mindfulness has helped them be more relaxed and calm. It's important to keep any practice of mindfulness simple and fun. It also shouldn't be forced. If they are resistant to a specific practice, try something else. In this video, we are going to go over 5 simple mindfulness exercises for kids. They are fun and really easy to do.
The “I'm the MAN of this house” bravado and “Wait until your father comes home” coming from mom, DOES NOT happen in the house of a Modern Dad. See what defines a Modern Dad in this episode.
When you have a child... and this starts when they are babies, there is something that happens to you when you see your child accomplish something. As a baby, this might be rolling over or taking their first steps, then climbing up the jungle gym, riding their bike for the first time, etc. Then we get into school things like grades, maybe a music or dance performance, sports, graduation, college, you name it. There are so many moments that affect us as parents. There could be a feeling of joy, a sense of accomplishment, and a feeling of being proud. However, I'm asking you to stop telling your child you are proud of them. You aren't helping them. In fact, it could be impacting them in a negative way and in this video, I'm going to tell you why it's not a good idea and what you should be saying to them instead.
There is a special bond between a father and a daughter. This concept of “girl dad” became really popular recently when Kobe Bryant past away. A story by ESPN's Elle Duncan highlighted Kobe's relationship with his daughters and during her interview (in which she was pregnant with a girl) he said “girls are the best”. Many fathers of daughters feel this same way. It doesn't take away from the relationship we have with our sons, but being a girl dad is unique, it's different. This one is for you new dads with a daughter. In this episode, I am going to go over some new dad tips for girl dads. What makes this relationship so unique and how can you best position your daughter to thrive.
We have all been conditioned that when you do something wrong, you are supposed to get punished. When our kids misbehave, we want solutions on how we can correct their behavior so they don't do it again. So what are the types of punishment that work best? In this episode, we are going to review a few different common types of punishment and go over whether they are effective or not. Hopefully, by the end of this video, you will be able to choose what type of punishment works best for you and your family.
I don't know what's going on in your house, but the first few days of social distancing and self-quarantine because of the coronavirus (or Covid-19) were pretty messed up. I found myself overwhelmed with anxiety and depression. After a couple of days of my pity party, I began doing what I knew I had to do. I needed to figure out how to change my attitude and get rid of the negativity I was pushing on my family and the anxiety I was feeling. I can tell you it worked. It's not perfect but boy do I feel better. So in this podcast, we are giving you 5 tips for fighting the coronavirus anxiety and depression that worked for me. Let's get you feeling good and calm.
For the people who's companies have transitioned to a remote workforce, you now find yourself being forced to work from home during this coronavirus time. Now, you may like the idea of your commute to work only being a few seconds. But because schools are closed, you now find yourself handling multiple roles. You are your child's school teacher, their principle, PE instructor, etc. All still while being their dad. In this episode we are going over some tips on how you can manage all of these roles at once...just kidding, you can't do it all at once. But I am going to go over some ways to be able to work from home and still be a dad...all while keeping your sanity. Let's see if we can find some balance.
In this podcast, I'm going over some parenting tips that maybe you can use during this time. Again, these are things that are working for my wife and me with our kids. By working, I mean we are doing them and keeping fairly calm and not constantly fighting with each other or the kids. So that's good.
Depression sucks. It knocks you down, makes you not want to be around other people, and can cause havoc in your life...and if you are a dad, then it also certainly affects other people around you...specifically your kids. That's often the last thing we want to happen but it does. You might be feeling Dad depression because of financial strain, relationship issues, your job, or a combination of many things. You may feel you are not good enough or should be better. Whatever the reason, I'm telling you, you can get out of it. I do want to make a disclaimer. I'm not a doctor or a licensed therapist so this information I'm sharing with you is my opinion based on my own experience. If you are having thoughts of suicide or hurting others, please get help immediately. But In this video, I wanted to talk about dad depression. Why do so many men suffer from it and how can you get out of it. If you feel you need professional assistance I highly recommend calling one of these numbers. Substance Abuse and Mental Health Administration (SAMHSA) Helpline: 1-800-662-4357 National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255 Samaritans: 1-877-870-4673 National Hopeline Network: 1-800-442-4673 Veterans Crisis Line: 1-800-273-8255
Becoming a dad is really like nothing else. Let's face it, we are all pretty clueless in the beginning. Sure we hope you are watching our videos and getting a lot out of them, but becoming a dad is a very unique experience. Until you actually go through it, you really don't know what it is like. But of course, if there were something that I wish I would have known. I maybe would have stressed a little less, had fewer arguments with my wife, and just would have enjoyed the early journey a little more. In this podcast I'm going to go over What I Wish I knew Before Becoming a Dad. You get the benefit of learning from my experience (and mistakes)
The question we are discussing today is “Should new dads take paternity leave?” When first hearing the question, it seems like the answer is an overwhelming yes. Well, of course, this way new dads have the opportunity to bond with their baby and take on important responsibilities at home. But what if it isn't that simple? I recently talked with a father of 3 who took paternity leave for 9 months for each of his children. However looking back, he felt like taking that time off was the wrong decision for him. In today's episode, I want to dive into this topic a little further. Let's see if we can answer the question: Should new dads take paternity leave?
If your child is old enough to be in school and you have to get them out the door in the morning or you take them to school at a certain time, you know that the morning routine can be challenging. There is possibly some yelling going on, a child running out the door with shoes in hand, and the urge to break speed limit laws just so your child isn't late to school. So in this episode, we are going over 5 ways to speed up your morning routine so you can get the kids out the door on time. This podcast is brought to you by Three Bridges Egg Bites. Three Bridges is committed to giving you a healthy balanced meal, quick, so you can get out the door! Three Bridges Egg Bites are cheesy, meaty, and full of great protein to get you and your little ones through the morning. Check them out at https://threebridges.com/egg-bites/
You just found out your girlfriend is pregnant. This probably wasn't planned or wanted and you weren't ready to be a father. It just wasn't part of your master plan. I understand. That is a difficult thing to deal with. You may be freaking out and trying to make sense of it all. Well, I'm here to help you. In this episode we are going to answer the question: My girlfriend is pregnant, what should I do?
When I was a first time dad, I really wanted to enjoy our new baby. and I did....But if I'm honest, there were those moments where if I was to go back and do it again, I may have done things a little differently. I could have used some first time dad advice. Now I have a 9 and 11 year old, so my perspective is a little different now. I probably would have enjoyed the baby a little more. In this episode, I'm going over some first time dad advice for you to enjoy your new baby.
A myth is defined as a widely held but false belief or idea. When it comes to fatherhood there are definitely beliefs and ideas that we hear about and just aren't sure whether they are true or not. Some of the myths are around because at some point in history, they could have been true. I will also say that depending on where you live and/or the culture you are a part of, that could be another reason you hear these myths. Well, what I would like to do in this episode is to talk about these fatherhood myths. You can then decide whether they are real or not.
Pregnancy is a unique experience. It's all new. It's scary and exciting all wrapped into one. But let's be honest, we have it much easier than our wives. Our wives have to go through the physical changes, the hormones, and the actual process of labor. But as a soon to be dad, we want to help. In fact it's a question I get a lot. How can I help my pregnant wife? So in this episode, we are going to give you some suggestions on how you can help her during the pregnancy.
In episode 256 of the Dad University Podcast, we discuss things that can help you feel less overwhelmed. When becoming a new dad, there is so much transition and so many new problems coming up that you may not have dealt with in the past. To help you feel less stressed and less overwhelmed listen to these great tips Jason has to offer.
I've been asked this quite a few times, in fact, I just went on YouTube live the other day and this question came up and I got it again through Facebook yesterday. , How do I deal with an overbearing mother in law. I'm going to provide some specific tips but I want to first cover some general advice. This doesn't matter whether it's your mother in law, father-in-law, your wife's sister or her brother....this applies to anyone on your wife's side of the family. If there is a problem, it is not for you to get involved. This was actually advice I received from my mother many years ago. She had dealt with some issues on my father's side and made it clear that going over family lines was a no-no. If something bad was to happen, there is the possibility of no return. You see, this isn't your blood family. Unconditional love isn't a requirement. Let's say you have an argument with your wife's sister. You may not ever recover. You need to stay out of crossing that family line. You discuss the issue with your wife and your wife needs to handle it. She is the one that needs to talk with her mother about whatever the issues are. If she is unable or unwilling, then the issue is between you and your wife. If something happens with your parents, you are the one that needs to handle it. Your wife should not be getting in arguments with your parents. It works both ways. Have that talk with your wife and be clear about your family too. You will deal with your family and she will deal with hers. Ok, now that we know you aren't to get involved with your wife's side of the family, let's get to some tips on how to deal with an overbearing mother in law. When you have a child, you sometimes get a little more sensitive to people's suggestions or advice or their parenting style. My mom used to say “what happens at grandma's house, stays at grandma's house." She had given the kids candy and was upset about it. She explained it to me this way. Jason, if my grandkids remember my house and being with me as fun because they got candy, I think that's ok. After my mom passed away I realized how valuable that was. Whether it's our in-laws or our own parents, they may do things a little different than we choose to do. Anyways, here are some things to keep in mind: 1) It's a package deal – You probably knew what you signed up for when you said: “I do”. Parents, siblings, aunts, uncles, they all come with the package when you marry. Especially if your wife is close with her family, then you have to keep in mind that it is a package deal. That will help you keep perspective. 2) Be nice – Yes I'm saying to smile and be nice. You don't have to get along perfectly with your mother in law and you don't need to fake a relationship if it's not there, but you still should nice and respectful. Sometimes you just have to bite your tongue and smile. 3) Set boundaries – Well, your wife needs to set the boundaries. Discuss the boundaries you want to set with your wife and once you both agree, she needs to communicate them to her mom. Does she need to call before she comes over? Does the baby need to go to sleep at a certain time? Be clear what your wishes and instructions are. Don't expect they will all be followed or respected but she can certainly try. 4) Don't take it personally – She may be an unhappy woman or just very opinionated. Don't let what she says affect you. She could be critical of your parenting, or how you do things. Great, let her have an opinion. 5) Take it into consideration – When your mother in law makes a suggestion or provides advice, a good phrase to use is “We will take that into consideration”. It doesn't make you have to do it at least acknowledges that you hear what she is saying and will think about it. Even if you have no intention of taking her advice, the fact that you will consider it may be enough. 6) Get to know her – I mean really get to know her.
Having already been through the newborn phase years ago, it's much easier now to look back and realize how much I worried about specific things related to the baby that I didn't really need to worry about. At the time so many of these things seemed really important or like they are a big deal when you are dealing with them. But as I look back I can now say I wish I would have worried less and not really cared so much about these things. So in this podcast, I'm going over 10 Things New Dads Don't Need to worry about. Having a baby is like nothing else we have ever experienced. So I understand the worry. I'm just trying to help you guys understand that you may not need to spend so much time and effort worrying. Let's get to it 1) Messing up - you are going to mess up. 2) Saying No – This doesn't mean saying no to your child, it means saying no to everyone else. While there are times you wish life just stopped or at least slowed down for you, everything else is still happening around you. The difference is that you are dealing with a baby which adds a little 3) Getting Everything - From 3 different strollers depending on the situation, too many toys, monitors, numerous swings and seats....it's enough. If you have a baby registry, try to focus on things that matter: diapers, food, clothes. 4) What other people think - Your family and friends will have opinions, great, let them have one but don't let it get to you. You may have parents or in-laws who may tell you how something should be done. A great response is “I'll take that into consideration”. 5) Not getting enough sleep - You will be sleep deprived for a bit and probably be tired but it doesn't last forever. The baby eventually learns how to sleep. 6) No more ME time – Whether you want to hang with the guys, exercise, or you have some other hobby, you still can do it. You just may need to manage your time a little differently. Maybe cut out some of the TV or screen time. You would be surprised how much free time frees up. 7) Not Having enough experience – Do you know how many millions of men have become fathers before you. I don't know the exact number but it's a lot. 8) Achieving Milestones – The evaluation of your baby starts right at birth when they tell you how much it weighs and the length. Then the pediatrician visit will tell you your baby's head is 95 percentile and the weight is 65. It's here we start to worry about when the baby is going to roll over, crawl, then walk. Don't worry about it. 9) Spoiling the baby – you aren't going to give the baby too much affection. There isn't such thing as holding the baby too much or picking it up when it cries. Really for the first year, your attention is all good. The baby will feel loved, safe, and secure. There is nothing wrong with that. 10) Bonding with the baby - It can take some time. I would love to hear from you. Leave your feedback below!
It doesn't matter if you have a newborn, toddler, small child, teen, or adult child, you will get annoyed at something they do. We'll, newborns aren't really that annoying...they are cute and don't know what is going on, so nevermind them. But the rest of these kids? You better believe that they can get on our nerves, a lot. In this episode, we are going to share with you what to do when your child annoys you. Let me describe a scenario that absolutely annoys me. See if you can relate. I have a pretty eventful date at work, calls, meetings, customers...I'm tired. I get home from work and walk toward my front door. I haven't even gotten inside and at my front door is there is a bicycle that is supposed to go in the garage, muffin wrappers, and a pair of really muddy shoes. Now if I was a positive thinker I would look at that situation and say to myself, “wow look how good my kids are.” They came outside to eat instead of getting crumbs all over our entryway. They took their shoes off so they wouldn't get mud in the house. They left the bike outside and didn't bring it through the house. But instead, I'm annoyed. I'm annoyed at my kids because they left a mess at the front door. I haven't even gotten inside yet and I'm annoyed. We don't need to go into detail about how this same mess is happening in other rooms. The important detail is that the house was cleaned yesterday. In less than 24 hours, these children have managed to cause havoc...and to annoy me. So what do we do? Well, we YELL of course. “Get this bike out here. Clean up these wrappers, and hose off your shoes NOW!” That will teach them. This will never happen again....until tomorrow. Let's get to the reason you are watching this video. You are saying to yourself “yep, my child is annoying” what can I do? Here it goes, listen carefully: If your child annoys you, it is your problem. Let me repeat it because I that may not have been crystal clear: If your child annoys you, you are the one with the issue. This doesn't mean your child doesn't need to be taught what to do, what to say, or how to behave. It means we are responsible for our own feelings and how we react. We actually get to decide how we feel. Two different people can walk up to that scenario I explained and have 2 completely different feelings. One can be totally annoyed, and the other can handle it calmly. How we react can also be determined by other unrelated interactions. Maybe you dealt with a difficult situation at work that day, maybe you received bad news about a friend. There are so many inputs that happen throughout the day. we have to be aware of how those inputs affect how we interact with our kids and could determine whether they annoy you or not. I'm making light of a very profound concept. It is easier than it sounds but I'm telling you if you can practice this and even just make a little progress, your life and how you interact with drastically improve. How do we begin to make the choice? The choice that our child doesn't annoy us. Here are some things to keep in mind: Pause – Stop and notice that you are feeling or getting annoyed. Is your heart rate increasing, maybe you begin to breathe faster...notice the actual physical changes in your body Breathe – Take an extra-long, deep breath. You just realized you are feeling annoyed so take a second with your pause and breathe. Ask yourself; Why am I feeling this way? you may not have the exact answer right away but the answer can't include your child. Meaning you can't answer it with “Because my child made a mess”. In the example I gave about coming home to the stuff at the front door. I get annoyed because I like a clean house. I clean my things up and feel like others should too. I also have discussed this issue numerous times so there is a feeling of not being listened to. Take responsibility for your feelings – Recognize it is your choice for feeling anno...
In this episode, we are talking about how to be a good father. I'll at least tell you want I think it takes. But you are going to have to put in the work. Being a good father can mean different things to different people. For some, it might mean that when your child is an adult, they will actually call you to go to lunch. For others, being a good father means your child moves out of the house on their own a contributing member of society. I set out to really define what I thought is needed to be a good father. So I created what I call the Fatherhood Formula. The Fatherhood formula is 7 principles of dad success. We have talked about the 7 principles here on the podcast. I have also made a YouTube series of it. Whether you are a soon to be father, new father, or experienced father just looking to improve your skills, the Fatherhood Formula covers some serious ground in explaining what it takes to be a good father. Let's jump into it. #1 Commitment - Is your role as a father a priority to you? You have to be committed. It's like anything that you want to go well, you have to commit to it and make it a priority. You are watching this video so I'm hoping you are already committed. But it's crucial to remember this for the future. You are going to be challenged. You are going to have other things pull at your time and energy. Being a good father requires that commitment from you. Don't take it lightly. #2 Contact - You may have had a father who you felt was a good dad, but they weren't very affectionate. Well, they could have been even better if they were affectionate. Touch is crucial. The affection of a father is powerful and meaningful. Give your child hugs and kisses. It doesn't matter what age and you aren't going to spoil them with too much affection. Hold their hand (while they still will with you). Put your arm around them. Sit close to each other while watching TV. Just remember that contact will help make you a good father. #3 Connection – All humans thrive on and need connection. The negative part is that if you don't connect with them in a good way, they are more likely to connect to others in a bad way. Fathers can connect with their kids through play, the contact I just discussed, reading with them, etc. But Connection takes a lot of effort. And for some fathers, even the idea of connection is foreign or uncomfortable. We also have a tendency to try to connect in a way that feels good for us. You have to connect in a way that feels good for your child. What do they like to do? To talk about? You can't think about yourself, you need to think about it from their point of view. You are waiting for them to feel connected. #4 Communication – We often think that communication is us talking. But for kids communication is us listening to them. Us men aren't always good at listening. We sometimes have a tendency to want to provide advice even when it's not asked of us. Also, what you say is only 7% Communicating with your child 3% is how you say it and your non-verbal communication. If you don't believe this, think about when you were a kid and knew exactly what your dad was thinking just by him giving you a look. He didn't even need to say anything. #5 - Character – You want to know how to be a good father? Lead by example. Your character and how you handle yourself is crucial. They are watching you, listening to you, and will do what you do. How do you treat mom? The people around you? Are you expecting things from your child that you are not doing yourself? Whether it's positive or negative, you are showing them the way through your character. The #6 principle on how to be a good father - Coaching – Switch your thinking from a parent to a coach. When your child messes up, you don't yell at them. You show them the proper way to do whatever it is they messed up on. Like a coach preparing a player for a game,
We are talking about how to get your baby to sleep through the night. But before we do, I want to introduce our sponsor of today's podcast: PUREBOOST Pureboost is a healthy alternative to energy drinks and way cheaper. It doesn't have any sugar in it and is packed with a bunch of vitamins and minerals and it tastes really good. They are little packets you simply mix with water. There are 3 flavor options. I just get the combo pack because I can't decide and like a different one each day. They taste great, it 100mg of natural green tea caffeine and is clean, antioxidant energy. The owners of PureBoost are parents as well and they really support what we are doing. They are offering Dad University listeners 50% off your first order. Go to gopureboost.com/daduniversity/ Alright, let's get back to getting our babies to sleep. Sleeping through the night is one of the primary goals when your child is firstborn. Everyone is asking: did he sleep through the night? How is her sleeping doing? Are you making it through the night with that little one? Seriously. There are a couple of popular sleep training methods to mention. Most experts and pediatricians suggest waiting until about 3-4 months old to start any kind of sleep training for a baby. So if you have a newborn you might want to wait a bit before you do something like this. Here are a couple of popular methods: 1) Ferber method – This was a technique created by Dr. Richard Ferber in which you allow the baby to cry for a certain amount of time before comforting them. The time gets longer and longer as you go on but the idea is that the baby learns to self-soothe so that if they do wake up in the night, they can go back to sleep. 2) Cry It Out – Do you know why baby's cry? Because it works. A baby quickly learns that if it cries, someone will provide it attention. With the cry it out method, you basically are allowing the baby to cry itself to sleep. The idea is that eventually, the baby learns that crying doesn't work for getting the attention. The cry it out method is often tougher on the parents than it is for the baby. I remember trying this with our first child and after 45 minutes straight we couldn't take it anymore.. He was supposed to fall asleep already according to this method, but he didn't. #3) The No cry method – This is also sometimes known as the no tears method. When your baby cries, you pick them up for reassurance and then put them back down. You do this as much as needed. The main idea here is creating a comfortable sleep routine and sticking with it. A lot of different approaches may fall under the no cry method but ultimately you are comforting the child. Every child is different and like with most things, you need to see what sleep training method works best for you and your child. Keep in mind too, none of these sleep training methods work after one day. It can take a week, two, or even more. Now there are some tips that I found really helpful in getting our baby to sleep through the night and I think they apply no matter which method you use. 1) Stick to a schedule - Put them down to sleep at the same time every night. For some, this may be hard because of your own schedule but you need to figure out a way to keep the baby on a schedule for sleeping. 2) Put them down earlier – Contrary to logic, putting them down earlier helped them sleep longer...at least for both of my kids. Ideal bedtime is earlier than you probably think. Try 6:00-6:30 to put them down. 3) Establish a bedtime routine – In addition to the schedule, establish a routine. You do the bath then pajamas, then a book, then feeding, then sleep. Kids thrive on routine and knowing what comes next. Keep everything in the same order. Routines worked really well with our children in helping them sleep through the night. The key is that as a parent, you have to stick to the routine. 4) Remove Distractions – Get all of the mobiles,
Congratulations, you are going to be a new dad and you have a baby on the way. Hopefully, you have already watched some of our pregnancy-related videos. If you haven't, be sure to check them out after you are done with this one. We have listeners from all over the world, but in the US, the majority of births are done in hospitals, delivery a baby outside a hospital is becoming more popular. We recognize that are other types of delivery room scenarios in addition to labor and delivery rooms in a hospital. There are birthing centers, you may be delivering at home, or other scenarios. These tips will hopefully be helpful regardless of where the birth may be taking place. I was pretty lucky. My wife was a labor and delivery nurse for many years before we had our first child. While she said it was a lot different going through it herself, she was very familiar with everything. You have already made the decision that you are going to be in the room when your child is born. If you only get one thing from this video, understand that your main purpose as a new dad and being in the delivery room is to support her. Yes, it is your child, you want to experience the birth of your child, and you want to share that experience with your wife. But's let's be honest, she carried the baby for 9 months inside her and is the one going through the physical process of labor. You got the easy job on this one. Tip #1: Find Out What She Expects From You – You don't want to find out afterward that she really wanted you to be holding her hand during labor and you were an excited new dad busy taking videos. Have a conversation beforehand and listen to her. What would she like you to do or what expectations does she have? You'll get some points just for asking those questions. #2 - Know Your Limits – Birth, in general, is a pretty messy process. If you are squeamish by the sight of blood, then know you don't want to see that. That's ok. You shouldn't feel obligated to do anything you are not comfortable with. Various birthing situations usually provide options. You may be able to stay near her head and not see all of the details. Keep in mind you may have to balance this is she has any expectations about this. Which is why you have to have the discussion beforehand. #3- Be Her Advocate – Does she need something from the doctor? Is she uncomfortable? Is the staff not providing the level of attention that she may need? You need to step up and be her advocate when you are in the delivery room. Be her voice so she doesn't have to deal with that and can focus on the birth. #4 - Stay Calm – This is sometimes a tough one for new dads in the delivery room. In addition to her, you possibly have a family to deal with. There is stress, excitement, and labor can often take a long time. The important thing is to remain calm the best you can. You remaining calm will hopefully help her remain a little calmer. #5 Expect the Unexpected – Be flexible. You can have the most detailed birth plan in the world and think everything is going to happen a certain way, but there are no guarantees. There are so many variables when it comes to birth, you have to be ready to expect the unexpected. Roll with it. Something comes up, you adjust. As a new dad in the delivery room, you do have a big responsibility. Supporting your wife is a big deal and it's important. This is an experience you get to share together. Work as a team and be there for her.
This is a topic that most parents prefer to avoid talking about – death. It's uncomfortable and can bring up emotions and feelings that you just don't want to deal with. When we have kids, we want to protect them from harm and anything unpleasant and death is very unpleasant...it sucks. But the truth is that death is a reality. We all die eventually and nearly everyone experiences the unfortunate death of someone that they love. So how do we talk about death to our children? These are some things to help you discuss death with your child. Whether it's a parent, friend, relative, child, or even someone in the public eye, a death can really affect us. Most of us are not taught how to deal with death. Of course, this can vary culture to culture as some cultures treat death differently than others. I wanted to share with you some of my own personal experience with this process. My mother had passed away years ago after a long battle with cancer. It was devastating for my entire extended family. My son was 3 years old at the time and my daughter was 1. For my 1-year-old daughter, there wasn't much to deal with. But for my 3-year-old son, he knew grandma well and had questions. But forget about knowing how I should communicate the death of their grandma to my kids, I didn't know to deal with it for myself. I ended up going to grief counseling which was a game-changer. My therapist Jim, was absolutely instrumental in helping me through an extremely difficult time. I interviewed Jim on my podcast a few years ago. Today, I wanted to share with you what I learned about talking to my kids about death and hopefully, it can help you through the process: #1) Be honest – Don't hide it. Don't sweep it under the rug. Don't pretend it didn't happen. Of course with all of these tips, there are going to be differences in how you deal with it based on the child's age. We said that grandma died of cancer and is now in heaven. My son didn't quite grasp it all but he did understand that he wasn't going to see grandma anymore. She was now up in the sky. It was cute...one time a helium balloon accidentally left our hands and went into the sky, my son said: “don't worry, grandma will catch it”. Be honest with your kids. There is a lot of value in the truth #2) Be empathetic - Try to put yourself in your child's shoes. Look at the death from their perspective. Their age is going to make a difference. Maybe it was a parent, a sibling, or a friend. Your child may have a completely different relationship to the person who died than you did. Try to look at it from their perspective. #3) Use the word death – Sometimes we use different words thinking that it will make the situation easier to handle. We may use terms like passing away and as adults, we understand this. But for kids, “passing away” or “gone to sleep forever” can be confusing and even scary to kids thinking they could go to sleep and not wake up. Use the word death and it makes it very clear what you are talking about. #4) Allow yourself to grieve – This was the single most important thing I learned. Giving myself permission to cry, be angry, and feel all of the emotions that I went through. Don't judge yourself because you are crying. Don't judge yourself on how you are dealing with it. Giving yourself permission to feel whatever you do. Everyone deals with it differently so allow yourself to grieve. #5) Let your kids see your emotions – This was hard for me in the beginning because I felt I had to be strong around my kids and that meant I didn't want them to see me cry. I didn't want them to see me sad as I felt it would make them sad. But I learned that I needed to grieve...and if it happened to be around my children then ok. They saw that dad was sad and would sometimes ask questions. I would then say, yes, I am really sad about grandma's death. We will all be ok but yes I am sad.” This actually made me human to my kids.
You can take the toughest, meanest man in the world, and the one thing that can turn him into a softy is a baby daughter. Daughters have this power over a new dad much more than sons do. But we also often treat our daughters differently than our sons. Is that a good thing? In this episode, we are going to discuss some ways we may treat our daughters differently and go over some tips for new dads with daughters. If you have a new baby girl or have a daughter on the way these are some things you can do (or at least think about) right now. Be Physical – A study, published in the American Psychological Association's journal Behavioral Neuroscience, confirms that dad play more physical (like rough and tumble) with their sons than they do with their daughters. Dads with daughters focused more on emotional responses, like making facial expressions, singing, etc. So this means we are reinforcing gender stereotypes from the time they are born. Children benefit from all kinds of stimulation. Your daughter will benefit from you being physical with her. Play rough and tumble with her, wrestle. Do the same physical things you would do if you had a boy. Being physical is good for her. Compliment Her But Not on Her Appearance – Your daughter doesn't have control or has a choice of how she looks.....and we are all guilty of focusing on external things. Instead of telling your daughter “You are so pretty” or “You have such a beautiful smile” say something like “I'm really lucky to be your dad” or if she does something great, you can say “You did that by yourself”. It's great to use encouraging words that allow her to feel good inside.....and please Don't call your daughter princess. If she feels good about the inside, she will feel good about the outside. It doesn't usually work in reverse. Avoid Pinkification - Don't succumb to the pinkification of girlhood. Her toys don't have to be pink, they don't have to be what people would consider girl's toys. Let her decide what she likes. Does she like to play with cars, tools, or action figures? Great, let her make her own choices. The same goes for clothes. Not every piece of clothing has to be a pink frilly dress nor does it need to always be gender-neutral, but be mindful of what you are choosing to purchase. As she gets older, she will begin to choose what she likes. Allow her to be an individual and make her own choices. The next one may apply a little more as she gets a little older but I want you to start getting this engrained in your head NOW, while your daughter is still young... Don't Limit What She Can do – Other than the direction of wiping when changing a diaper...and BTW always go front to back with your daughter, there really should not be much difference on what little girls do versus boys. She should be able to get dirty, play any sport she chooses, be rough, or do anything else you or others might think is “for boys”. Being a dad with a daughter is a special gift. It is up to us fathers to make sure we love them unconditionally and support them to thrive. How they view this world is highly impacted by our interactions with them. Go hug and kiss your daughter and let her know how lucky you are to be her dad.
For many people in North America, being thankful and expressing gratitude is something that only happens once a year. Having a holiday like Thanksgiving shines a light on being thankful and forces everyone to stop and think about gratitude for a second. The thing we are missing out on is that practicing gratitude is so powerful, that it can literally change your life. Do you get depressed often? Do you find yourself wanting more all the time? A better car? A nicer house? Is your relationship rocky? Do you find yourself arguing all the time? Do your kids drive you crazy? What if I told you that all of these things can improve with gratitude? While thanksgiving is primarily a North American holiday, there are other countries that have similar holidays in which giving thanks and being grateful is part of the celebration. For many years, one of the traditions of my family was going around the room at Thanksgiving dinner and saying something that you were thankful for. Certainly, it's a great exercise, especially for young kids to be thinking about gratitude and what they are thankful for. I can't emphasize enough how impactful gratitude can be. One of the areas I just mentioned was depression. Gratitude is the antidote to depression. Let me say that again because it's really important: gratitude is the antidote to depression. It is nearly impossible to be depressed if you are grateful. So if you are someone that feels down a lot. You need to start practicing gratitude. Here's a disclaimer first. If you have severe depression, thought of suicide, or have tried many things with no luck, please seek professional help in your area. But for many people who feel down, if there was an easy and FREE way to get you out of your ruts, to bounce back from those times when you are feeling down, would you do it? I'm not promising this happens overnight, although there have been times where this will change my thought immediately. Here are a couple of things you can do to practice gratitude: 1) Write down what you are grateful for. Put a notepad next to your bed and right when you wake up or right before you go to sleep, write down 3 things you are grateful for. I am thankful for the roof over my head, that I have food to eat.. Or maybe you are thankful that your children are healthy. Writing it down is very important as it solidifies it. While there might be some huge weights keeping you down right now, you are trying to train your brain to think about the positive things instead of the bad. And it works. 2) Gratitude Meditation – Use YouTube or a meditation app and find a 5 minute guided gratitude meditation. You close your eyes and someone will talk you through the meditation. It's easy, only takes a few minutes, and it can leave you feeling great afterward. 3) Replace Negative Thoughts With Gratitude – Catch yourself when you say something negative or are thinking about something negative and replace it with a positive, gratitude statement. For example, this traffic is horrible. Replace the thought with “I can't do anything about this traffic, I'm going to listen to some music and enjoy the time I have in the car.” This one is not easy. We all have constant negative thoughts throughout the day. You have to catch yourself when you do this and turn it around. There are so many ways in which gratitude and being thankful can positively impact our lives: Are you wanting more things all the time? Car? House? We need to be grateful for what we already have. More things will come into our lives when we appreciate what we already have. Are you critical of your spouse and always pointing out what they are doing wrong? Turn it around and focus on what they are doing right. Did your wife take care of the baby this morning? Be grateful you have a partner you trust to watch your child. Did clean underwear just magically appear in your drawer? Be grateful someone else did your laundry.
Sitting there waiting for someone to finish being on their phone is not very enjoyable. You are being ignored and not paid attention to. This is phubbing, the combination of being on your phone and snubbing someone. It's happening all over but especially within families. In today's podcast, we are going to go over what you can do if someone is phubbing you and if you are the one guilty of phubbing, we will give a few tips so you can stop it. There is an overarching category to when technology devices interrupt or intrude our lives, this is defined as technoference. It's the mix of technology and interference. This is happening in our families and only getting worse as rings, notifications beeps and vibrations happen more frequently. You are playing with your child and your phone in your pocket beeps or vibrates. You got a message! You have to check it and that is a technoference. Taking it a step further, If you are paying attention to your mobile phone instead of the person you are with, you are a phubber. Phubbing effects our families (including our children and spouses) as well as our friends and people in the workplace. The word phubbing was created by the McCann advertising agency in 2012 as part of a marketing campaign for the Macquarie Dictionary. It means the combination of phone and snubbing. When someone phubs you, you may feel less important, rejected , or excluded and this can have a negative impact on you. It's not a good feeling. Now, the most common phubbing that happens is between partners or spouses. If it is your spouse who is phubbing you, here are a few things you can do to try to reduce it: 1) Have a direct conversation - Your spouse may not even realize that they are phubbing you. Have a phubbing intervention. You may say, "Sometimes when we are together, and even when I'm talking to you. your head is in your phone. I'm being phubbed and I feel like you are ignoring me. Let them know it's not welcomed. 2) Be more entertaining or interesting - You might not like this one but take a hard look at yourself and see if maybe you are really boring. Is the phubbing possibly justified because you are not making any effort to engage your spouse. Ask them to go on a walk, play a game, do something rather than just sitting and wishing they would pay attention to you. 3) Create rules - In our house, we have a rule that there are no electronics at the dinner table. Maybe when you are on a date together, phones are put away and only used to be available for an emergency. Come up with the rules regarding phone usage when together that are realistic and that you both can live by. These tips can help you reduce your spouse's phubbing. But what if you are the phubber? What if you are phubbing your children? If you are, then you are communicating to them that the phone is more important than them. Whether you are phubbing your spouse or your child, there are some things you can do to try to end your phubbing. 1) Reduce notifications - Turning them off is best but I understand this may be too revolutionary of a concept. But is there anything that important that can't wait? You have to know that someone sent you a Facebook or Instagram message? Turning off or reducing notifications can help reduce the temptation to even be on your phone. This can pre-empt the phubbing. You get a message and before you know it, you are down a deep rabbit hole of pictures of classic cars. 2) Ask yourself: Can this wait? - When you pull out your phone, is it really that important? Or are you simply on autopilot, bored, or not even realizing you are doing it? Before you grab your phone, ask yourself if it can wait. 3) Be present - If your spouse or child is in the room and you happen to be on your phone, maybe consider putting the phone down or away. Show them that they are more important than the phone. When you are alone, go for it. But when others are present,
Well although it's past already, October was national bullying prevention month. Unlike the playground and school bullying of yesterday, today's bullying doesn't allow you to feel safe at home and the ease to be anonymous can make the threats and fear much worse. Welcome to Cyberbullying. Through the use of social media, text messages, and email....cyberbullying is the nightmare that too many kids are having to deal with. According to the Pew Research Center, 59% of U.S. teens have experienced cyberbullying. That's a big number! On this podcast, we are going to discuss some of the effects of cyberbullying and how we as parents can help stop it. Before we dive into Cyberbullyingg I want to introduce you to our sponsor of this podcast, the app Bark. Bark is an app that monitors texts, YouTube, email, and 24 social media platforms and apps. It looks for interactions that are perceived as harmful and detects them. Cyberbullying is one of the things bark looks for, but also drugs/alcohol, sex, mental health, suicide, etc. Once something is detected it notifies you the parent via text and email. This avoids you having to go through all of your child's messages and posts which can be extremely time-consuming but also can feel like an invasion of privacy. Bark monitors everything and simply notifies you when there is something of concern. Bark is offering Dad University listeners a special 1 free month and if you like it there is a small monthly fee...it is so worth it. Bark also works with schools for free which is awesome. You can visit bark.us/daduniversity and get your 1 month free. I'll also link it in the show notes. https://www.bark.us/?ref=daduniversity#signup When I was growing up, kids would spread false rumors, name call, or receive physical threats. And if you were bullied like this it felt horrible. So you take that bully behavior and you amplify it, add the ability to do it 24/7, add anonymity, and then you have cyberbullying. Cyberbullying brings harassment to another level, outing people by sharing private information, excluding someone from online discussions and then talking about them, to even setting up fake profiles just to harass someone. The effects of cyberbullying are pretty troublesome. Similar to traditional bullying, some of the effects include depression anxiety poor grades lower self-esteem health-related issues alcohol or drug use Kids who are cyberbullied often feel that they can't escape it. The bullying is etched in history online and it seems it will last forever. They feel lonely, powerless, and they will often lose sleep because of it. So how can we prevent or stop cyberbullying? As a parent, we need to make sure our children are aware of how wrong any type of bullying is. So, of course, we absolutely want to make sure our child is not doing the bullying. Another important part is that children understand that being a witness of cyberbullying and doing nothing about it, is also bad. Kids need to feel confident enough to intervene and let their peers know that it is not ok to cyberbully someone else. While there are currently no federal laws on cyberbullying, state laws are taking shape and schools are becoming more involved as they realize the escalating problem. But we can't always leave it up to the law. Here are some additional ways to stop cyberbullying: 1) Know what your child is doing online - You need to be aware of the apps they are using and how they interact with those apps. Make it easy on yourself and use a service like our sponsor Bark. Monitor what they are doing online. 2) Take it seriously - Be sure to investigate if something is going on. Don't minimize what your child could be experiencing. Catching these situations early is going to make it easier to stop. 3) Look for warning signs - Stopbullying.gov says to look out for changes in device usage patterns, watch for emotional responses to their device,
Traditions & rituals are practices or beliefs which are passed down from generation to generation. There are a couple of types of traditions. Religious traditions, Holiday traditions, Cultural traditions, and Family Traditions. For this podcast I want to focus on family traditions. We will cover why family traditions are important and go over some family tradition examples you can implement. For me, some of my favorite memories as a kid were around family traditions. Having dinner nearly every night together, my mom and I going through the drive-through of a fast-food restaurant every week, or my sisters and I traveling for this big swim meet every year and we got to stay in a hotel. Now as a parent I look back at those family traditions I had and I want to create some with my own kids. Here are 9 reasons why family traditions are important to me. 1) They create positive memories - and the memories last a lifetime. Some of mine go back 35-40 years to when I was a young child. 2) Family traditions provide consistency or continuity - Children thrive on routine. We see that from when they are a baby, into toddlers, and beyond. Consistency is a positive thing for kids. 3) It promotes bonding - Whether you are spending time doing a family tradition or the family tradition involved beliefs, it offers that cohesiveness that promotes bonding. 4) Family traditions help create a sense of identity - This is our family thing, this is what we do. That sense of identity can be very valuable to children as they get older. The lack of identity can sometimes lead them down an unwanted path. 5) Shows commitment - It's not easy to commit to something on a regular basis. Commitment is an important trait. 6) It Increases family values - Family traditions reinforce the importance of family. Sure there are other factors but I think my family's traditions growing up did contribute to me realizing how important family was. 7) Offers belonging - Like the sense of identity, feeling like you belong to something is really crucial to nearly all humans. If it's not in a positive way, we will seek it out in a negative way. 8) Family traditions are something to look forward to - Through research, it has been found that one of the keys to happiness is having something to look forward to. Family traditions can help with that. 9) Most of the time they are fun and enjoyable - They typically have an overall positive impact on your mood. So now you understand why family traditions are so important. They can have a huge impact on our lives. There are tons of examples of family traditions, but if you are looking for some inspiration, here are some family tradition ideas: 1) Secret Handshake - Maybe when you are holding your child's hand, you squeeze it 3 times to say "I love you". My wife and I do this along with our kids. 2) Bedtime Stories - Whether you read out of a book or make them up, bedtime stories never get old. Well, your teen might think differently. 3) Family Game night - Bust out those old fashioned board games or cards and play some games to create a family tradition. 4) Movie night - Make some popcorn and rotate who gets to choose the movie. You can be really adventurous and even set up a movie screen outside. 5) Saturday/Sunday morning breakfast - make a special meal or go out on the weekends where you get to take your time and enjoy each other's company. 6) Have a Weekly family meeting - We talk about this in our video about family rules, but a weekly family meeting can be a great tradition for everyone to know what is going on. 7) Family Service Day - Volunteer as a family. This could be for your local community, religious organization, or even just your neighborhood. Teaching the kids about volunteering is an extra bonus. 8) Family Vacations - Whether you go to the same place every year or switch it up, either way, those family vacations will be memorable and you will ...
If you are about to have a baby or you just had one, you are probably feeling a lot of different emotions. You may be excited, scared, happy, or even anxious. The combination of all of those emotions is pretty common. To set expectations and be very clear, everyone is different. I also want to say right off the bat, it's ok if you don't feel the bond with the baby right away. I remember my wife and I brought our first child (our son) home from the hospital and we set him on the bed, we looked at each other, and I said "ok, now what do we do". She was a labor and delivery nurse so she was a lot more comfortable with a baby than I was. She also seemed to have a bond with our son right away. Granted she carried him for 9 months, was breastfeeding, and spent more time with him. It actually took me a few months after he was born to really start feeling that connected to him. If your baby is still in the womb (it hasn't been born yet), here are a few things you can try to increase the bonding with your baby. First, feel the baby move - Put your hands on your wife's stomach and feel the baby kick or move. It gets real when you feel the baby kick or a turn. Experiencing the movement of your child in the womb can help with the bonding. Your wife feels this a lot so it's nice to be able to also feel the movement. Another, talk, sing, or read to the baby - You can foster the bonding process by being verbal. Your baby gets to hear your voice but also you get to feel like you are communicating with it. Many experts recommend this, and some people love doing it. For me, talking into my wife's belly just didn't come naturally. I forced myself to do it a little bit, but it wasn't my thing. It is worth a try. Next, Get a Sonogram - Get a printout or digital copy of the ultrasound - it makes it tangible. When I saw the actual form of our child it was crazy. It was fascinating. I couldn't believe that it was our baby. For many, this makes it real and can assist with the bonding. The last thing prior to the baby being born...and I'm putting it in this section because it requires planning prior to the baby being born is taking Paternity Leave. I understand not everyone has the ability to take off the time, but if you can, I would highly suggest it. Paternity leave gives you the ability to spend that early time with your child. Once the baby is born, there are definitely some things you can do to try to increase bonding. Again, keep in mind it's ok if you don't feel a really strong bond right away. This is common. 1) Skin to skin contact - It's a pretty cool feeling for both of you. You could lie down or recline in a chair and put the baby on your chest. Another way would be to give your baby a massage. Allow their skin to touch your skin. Both the lying on your chest and a massage are great ways to improve bonding. 2) Feeding - If your wife is breastfeeding, she may pump some milk which would give you the opportunity to do feedings. If she is not breastfeeding and you are using formula, use that feeding time to bond with your newborn. 3) Changing diapers - The time you are changing a diaper can really be used as a bonding time with your child. Make diaper changing a positive experience where you get to interact instead of it being a chore you have to do. 4) Bathing - Most babies seem to really enjoy warm baths so you can bond with your baby by giving them a bath. Bath time was an awesome bonding time in our house. You can even get in the bath with your baby if you want. 5) Wear your baby - You can use a baby carrier to be close to your baby and still be able to do other things. Babywearing (especially for dads) has become more popular over the years. The closeness as well as being able to share activities can assist with bonding. 6) Eye contact - Look at your baby, smile, make faces. You can communicate with them just with facial expressions. Your newborn may eventually try to imitate your expressions ...
Our Co-Host Alan Bush is now a father! In this episode we give him a huge congratulations and discuss some surprises, struggles, favorites and more!
Money - how it's being spent, that there isn't enough. Feeling financially stressed can cause all sorts of issues Sex/Intimacy - Frequency of it, type Kids - behavior, how to discipline, how the other ones handle a situation. Chores / Responsibilities - Are you pulling your weight? One spouse often feels like they are doing much more than the other. Work - Staying late, the complaints that come with it. The obligations and stress it causes. We can sometimes be pulled in two different directions. Spouses can build up resentment blaming everything on the job. Habits - Leaving the toilet seat up, to dirty clothes being on the floor, to toothpaste cap not being on. I'd say in my house we actually don't argue a lot about habits but the one could be music. My wife will play music really loud, especially in the morning. My kids and her love it and I can't stand it. I need quiet in the morning. Relatives / Extended Family - From the mother in law to the crazy uncle, the extended family doesn't get unconditional love from the spouse. This can be a big source of friction. The rule iI was always taught is to stay out of your spouse's family's issues. Let each handle their own side. Jealousy - Whether because they are spending time with someone else or they give their attention to someone else, jealousy can be a big source of arguments. Free Time - what you do in your free time and how much free time you get. There often seems to be a discrepancy in how much free time each gets Friends - One doesn't like who the other hangs out with. The bad influence, taking time away from theirs