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Most of us think we're too smart, stable and strong-willed to join a religious cult, or to cut ourselves off from our families to join a group devoted to a charismatic leader. But clearly somebody's joining them. So why do people willingly give up their free will and independence to join cults? Do they realise what they're getting themselves into? And how do they get out? Emma Kennedy is joined by world-leading cult deprogrammer Rick Alan Ross and NXIVM cult survivor Sarah Edmondson to explore the strange allure of the cult mindset.    Buy Sarah Edmondson's book Scarred: The True Story of How I Escaped NXIVM, the Cult That Bound My Life through our affiliate bookshop and you'll help fund WHY? by earning us a small commission for every sale. Bookshop.org's fees help support independent bookshops too.    You can watch Sarah's fantastic Ted Talk here. WHY? is presented by Emma Kennedy. Produced by Eliza Davis Beard. Audio production and theme music by Jade Bailey. Managing editor: Jacob Jarvis. Group Editor: Andrew Harrison. Artwork by James Parrett. Additional music is from Artlist.io. WHY? is a Podmasters Production.     Instagram | Twitter | Threads Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

We're talking about how one of the characteristics of a cult is that they often present as a really good thing. A lot of times, they are doing really good things on the surface. If this weren't the case, people wouldn't be joining them. Additionally, not every cult starts as a cult. Sometimes it starts as on organization with really good intentions to help people. We'll discuss all of that, in this episode. https://www.ted.com/talks/sarah_edmondson_how_to_spot_a_cultSarah Edmondson is a Canadian actress who has starred in the CBS series Salvation and more than twelve films for the Hallmark Channel and Lifetime. She is also a well-established voice-over artist for popular series such as Transformers: Cybertron and My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic. In 2005, when NXIVM, a personal and professional development company, promised to provide the tools and insight Sarah needed to reach her potential, she was intrigued. Over her twelve-year tenure, she went from student to coach and eventually operated her own NXIVM center in Vancouver. Questions kept coming up about the organization's rules and practices, which came to a head in 2017 when she accepted an invitation from her best friend to join DOS, a “secret sisterhood” within NXIVM.In 2019, Sarah published Scarred: The True Story of How I Escaped NXIVM, the Cult that Bound My Life, with Kristine Gasbarre. In this tell-all memoir, she shares her story from the moment she takes her first seminar to her harrowing fight to get out. Her full story as a whistleblower is featured in the CBC podcast Uncover: Escaping NXIVM (downloaded over 25 million times) and The Vow, the critically acclaimed HBO documentary series on NXIVM. Now with the launch of “A Little Bit Culty,” Sarah and her co-host/husband Anthony “Nippy” Ames are keeping the conversation going by discussing the healing process with the help of experts and fellow survivors.Uncertain is a podcast of Tears of Eden, a community and resource for those in the aftermath of Spiritual Abuse. If you're enjoying this podcast, please take a moment to like, subscribe, or leave a review on your favorite podcasting listening apparatus. You can support the podcast by going to TearsofEden.org/supportTo get in touch with us please email tearsofeden.org@gmail.comFollow on Instagram @uncertainpodcastTranscript is unedited for typos and misspellings:Katherine: Well, hello, Sarah, Sarah: how are you? I'm great. How are you Katherine: doing? Okay. Do you know? Okay. It has been gloomy and St. Louis and today the first sign of sunshine and I like went outside to like be in the sun, but it was 30 degrees. And so I didn't stay there very long, but. It's beautiful today. Beautiful to see the sun.How are, how's the weather in your area? Sarah: I'm in Atlanta. We're in our very brief winter and it's, it's, it's just a couple of weeks, I think. And it really fluctuates on a day to day basis and I have no idea what's in store and I'm just getting used to that as a concept. Yeah. Katherine: I just kind of ups and downs.Yeah. Yes. I have relatives in the Atlanta area and I hear about the bipolar weather. Of yeah, very [00:02:00] similar to St. Louis fun times. Well, thank you so much for being here and your openness to telling your story here. Really excited to hear from you just about The impact of your experience in NXIVM and then your recovery process.You also have your podcast, a little bit culty that I highly recommend to everyone. It's just entertaining. It's good stuff and you learn a lot, but then it's also super entertaining. And so I hope folks will listen to that as well, but you get to interact with a lot of cult survivors through that. And so I w I'm very interested to hear.Just patterns and things that you have seen as you have been doing your podcast and working with folks in this, this area. But just to just start us, start us off for folks who may not know who you are or have not seen the vow or maybe haven't. About on HBO or the, or have listened to your podcast and you give us a little summary of who you are and why you are here. Sarah: [00:03:00] Sure. So my cliff notes slash, you know, elevator story, which I've had to use a fair bit since moving to Atlanta is that I am, you know, from Canada, born and raised, I. I pursued acting as a teenager and young adult, and I took a little tangent, a little detour when I joined a personal and professional development program, which I was taking to help me with my goals as an actor and my relationship at the time.And that was really wonderful in many ways for a long time at first. And it ended up being 12 years later, after many missed red flags, I didn't understand what I was looking at. A high control group or some, some people know this term as a cult, but I realized there's basically bad things going on behind closed doors and the personal development program that I'd been touting for many years as an advocate and as a recruiter for the company.I say company loosely was really a front [00:04:00] for our pipeline, for the leadership. To coerce and manipulate and ultimately not in all cases and not not for me, but for many people sex traffic as well So that's why it is now known as the sex cult in the in the newsletter And I newsletter sorry in the newspapers The headlines media does love a good sensational story.Sure do. Yes, as they sure do. And my role in that was that I was one of the whistleblowers that showed the physical abuse, which is the physical manifestation of emotional abuse, which had been going on for years in the form of branding. And I showed that on the New York times cover and that led to an investigation and the trial and eventual conviction of the leader.Six week trial led to 120 year conviction of the leader. And that was I left six years ago. The trial was about four years ago and three years ago, two and a half years ago. My sense of time is a [00:05:00] little off. My husband and I were in a docuseries that, that documented this whole journey, how we got in and how we escaped on HBO max called the vow.And that really propelled us into this really interesting space where, where we were now sharing something that a lot of people could relate to is like, Oh, I would've, I would've totally joined that. And that's flipped the script as a lot up until then. So many people we encountered, especially since leaving and shouting from the rooftops, we were in a cult you know, they were watching it going.I could have, I could have fallen for that when that's very different when the past people would say I would never have fallen for that. And that's opened up a whole, you know, set of bizarre doors and opportunities for us as whistleblowers and survivors to speak about our experience. Educate people. And that's been like a phenomenally rewarding thing.And ironically, and I didn't say this at the beginning, I, one of the reasons I joined next team as well was to help people. I was, you know, I really enjoyed that process and [00:06:00] now I get to do it for real on the other side and help educate, shine light, prevent, help people get out. If they're already in something, help people heal.If they've already gotten out. All the different stages along the way and help families. And overall just bring awareness to this topic that is kind of become a lot more mainstream now. Narcissism, cultic abuse, gaslighting. It's much more accessible and people are more aware of it. So it's been an interesting time to be part of the zeitgeist in that way.And and then now we have a podcast that emerged in COVID when we had stopped acting. So it's been a interesting, organic progression to be a podcaster as I wrote a book and also and now doing more speaking events and panels on the topic. So yeah, here we are. There we are. Yeah. Cliff notes.Katherine: Yes. I remember watching the vow. I don't remember. I think it was in during COVID watching it and [00:07:00] had just left an abusive church. And that was cult cults like they're definitely very high control, very lot of, you know, stuff being hidden by religiosity and God speak and Jesus talk. And I, I, a lot of us.who had left were like, have you seen The Vow? Have you guys been watching The Vow? Are you watching The Vow? Because The Vow is like very, very, very similar to what we just went through. And I think that that was the thing that stood out to me as well as how engaging it was. And it just I was like, that sounds like Christianity, like so much of so much of the, the attraction and the way that like the evangelizing that was happening and the way that people were getting brought into this thing that, that was presented as this very good thing.And in some ways it seemed like it actually was a good thing. Yeah. Tell me a little bit about that part of [00:08:00] it of like what attracted you to this. And like, what, what drew you in as a very professional human being? Sarah: Yeah. You know what? There's every single group that we've ever talked to anyone about in our podcast.There is always good stuff on the outside. And that's actually one of the first questions we ask people so that others can. See what some of those red flags are of like, you know, what's the catch with this perfect, shiny, amazing, happy community. Well, what, what drew me in was a number of things. And, and partly it was, you know, the age that I was.Where I was, you know, doing this acting work and it wasn't really filling my soul. It wasn't filling my cup in terms of like, this is not the meaningful work that I want to be doing. And the thought of. Cause really they offered a lot of things. The community was presented almost in a way that would appeal to whatever the person wants.And I later learned to do that for others. Like what, what is it that you're looking for? What I was looking for was a, [00:09:00] a community, a supportive, helpful community. I was looking for more meaning and purpose in my life being a, you know, Being in a Budweiser commercial wasn't like really that meaningful to me, even though it paid well, but it was like, this is not what I signed up for or what I wanted as an actor.And I've always been into personal development. I've always believed that. And I still believe actually that you can work on yourself or be, you know, be better or like work through. And there was a term that they used. I don't think I was really using this term before was limiting beliefs. That there's beliefs that we have, and I actually do believe that we have still believe that we have limiting beliefs about ourselves.Like Katherine: something like, I can't do it. Like, yeah. Sarah: Yeah. Yeah. Just like, you know, even as an actor, like even thinking things, thinking something like, which was had at the time, like I always get nervous and auditions, there's some beliefs under that about myself that caused me to be nervous. [00:10:00] Which would limit me about, you know, without, with auditions, cause that's like a big part of being an actor.So I really love the idea of working through my limiting beliefs, being, the best version of myself and, and striving to follow this model. And one of the things that appealed to me, I mean, I didn't like it at the beginning, but I eventually did like it after my first five day training, which is my first foray into Nexium is they offered this growth path in the form of.Like a martial arts system with different levels and stripes and colors and I liked that. Like I, there was something about that that was measurable for me. If I do this, I'll go to the next level and that, that appealed to me because an actor, we don't have that either, like get the job or you don't, you don't really know why you do or you don't, and you could do all the right things, but not actually go to the next level.So I liked the concept of being able to. Complete a task, work on a skill, and, and evolve. It was certainty. With certainty. Yeah, it was [00:11:00] certainty in a very uncertain world. Needless to say, I mean, it was all bullshit, but if it was what it was supposed to be, it would have been great. Katherine: Yeah. And if it is, if it is something that like is actually delivering what it's promising, then it would be a really awesome. Yes, exactly. Yeah, so, so those were some of the good things that drew you in just to create some context for folks what were some of the, like, things that started alarms, that started going off that were like, Hmm, maybe this isn't what it, what it's promising.Sarah: I mean, Honestly, there were, there were red flags right from the beginning, but I didn't know what I was looking at. If I had done, if I, if somebody invited me to something now that was. And with the education I have, I wouldn't have even signed the paperwork, let alone attended because I would have known, Oh, I'm feeling pressured and they're using a scarcity mentality in order to, you know, [00:12:00] like this is the only one.And when, you know, when are you going to do this and when are you going to change your life? And any hesitation I had would be. Proof of how I was not ready to commit to my goals. Like it was a lot of manipulation tactics just getting me there. And then once I was there a lot of red flags in regards to what I now know as setting the stage for future abuse.Even as simple as they said, like, you're going to feel uncomfortable and you're going to feel like you're going to, you're going to doubt that maybe even this is the right place for you to be. That internal dialogue is an indication of what they call the disintegration. So you're either integrated on a concept or disintegrated and any internal questioning was just a sign that you needed to work on something.I know. So, if you agree to that, which I did. Because I'm, I'm assuming that these people who, I just never, I never projected bad intent because that's the thing is when you give yourself over to a higher power or a higher authority, [00:13:00] you're saying, you know, better than I do. And tell me, tell me what to do.Tell me how to be. And I was, I was like, okay, well, I pay just paid like 20. 2, 100 is 2, 500 Canadian to spend five days in a room and I want to work on my issues. I am saying, I trust you. You got to tell me what you see and if what they're saying is different than how I feel, that's a problem. Katherine: Yeah, absolutely. Oh, and that's such a such an easy thing to happen and then it's presented as you're like to listen to someone else tell you and name you and tell you what you need to work on and listen to someone else outside of you is. Is held up as like a humble thing and like a character quality.Yes. And if you were to resist and ask questions or say, I don't feel comfortable with Sarah: this. And that's, Oh, then I'm also being defiant. Katherine: Yeah. Yeah. Or selfish or, or you don't want to work on your issues or you don't really care Sarah: about this. Yeah. I mean, they said that you should be able to ask [00:14:00] questions and put your hand up, but it was very clear when people did ask questions, you know, how they felt about that.And also like it was, I learned very quickly that there were names for the feelings I was having that weren't good. So I was just suppress them. And I want also, I'm a good girl, I want to be a good girl, I want to get it right, I like the gold stars. Yeah. I like the validation. Katherine: Absolutely. And there was a very clear like type of person that fit and you like, learned to Sarah: fit.Yes. I learned to fit and I wanted to get the, I wanted to go up the levels and I wanted to get the next stripe. And I learned to override the feelings because the other thing they said is like, you're here to work on your shit. You're here to work on your stuff. So. Yeah. You know, don't leave. We're just talking about these things.If the sash around your neck, there was a sash systems for the martial arts ranks. If that bothers you, why can't you even talk about it in a room? Like we're just talking about it. So I should be able to talk about it. And so therefore don't leave. If I'm leaving, I'm just running away from my issues.so [00:15:00] many double binds. We call them massive double. Katherine: Yes, literally the phrase that popped into my head. Yes. Well, I, I want folks to be able to hear your whole story. And so I'll just plug your book, which is called scarred. Correct. Sarah: Yes, thank you. And I don't know if you ever do giveaways on your podcast, but we can do that too.Katherine: Let's do it. Why not? Yeah, I haven't done one of those in a long time. Let's do it. And then a little bit culty, and then also the vow on HBO, or not HBO on max. So those are places that folks can get more. About your story and actually get your get your full story and all the details about that.And so I want to step into talking about the impact of this. And if you want to talk about the impact like while you were in it and like what, what this coercive control manipulation was doing to you while you were in it. And then very specifically after after you left, like how was so I'm going to ask you to tell us a little [00:16:00] bit about how you experienced this, this trauma showing up for you and what, what did this experience do to you?And if you want to also share some examples of just similar patterns you've seen in folks that you have been interviewing on your podcast as well. Yeah, just paint us a picture of what happens after this experience. Sarah: After leaving? Yes. I mean, there was many different stages, I would say, like I've been out for six years and there was a lot of just grief, like I was, I had a massive PTSD reaction or potentially CPTSD just from the sort of ongoing abuse, but I, in many ways, I was like kind of the, one of the least Can I swear on this podcast?I was one of the least fucked with because, because I was a recruiter and I brought so many people in many ways, they kind of left me alone. I, I had, I was in Vancouver. I was running, I had been running my center. Which is sort of like a. You know, a separate, like, it's sort of like a franchise. Like I had my, I had [00:17:00] my center and I was using the tools and the parts of the program that were good and that I liked.And I, you know, brought people in that were going up the pipeline to the leadership. So they kind of left me alone, but I, so I didn't have the same amount of. 100 percent commitment. Like I'd never moved to Albany. I'd never moved and given up my whole life. And I always had my foot in reality. In other words, like my foot outside of the compound, it wasn't an actual compound, but some people gave up everything to be there, you know?And so that kept me in many ways, it protected me and gave me a soft place to land. There's a lot of people I could go to and that I always knew that we. Were you know, people thought that we were in a cult. I, I knew that. And I, and I thought that they just didn't understand. Mm-Hmm. , right. I just, I was like, oh, they don't get it.And for, for the first couple of weeks. And, you know, I was just going through those people and being like, okay, you were right. And I'm sorry. And I'm really kind of fucked up right [00:18:00] now. Shouting from the rooftop and like doing all the stuff that we did to get the media attention and things like that so there was like different stages of first I was on this yeah rampage of like I got to take this thing down and I felt like I was one of the There's a few of us that were at the forefront of that and I think in many ways It was the ones that of us that could whereas other people were so had been so head fucked and so gaslit and so manipulated that they were like, you know, literally in bed depressed Couldn't move or, or just had to shut down and like pretend it never happened and move cities and like not even deal with it, which people dealt with it in different ways.My dealing with it was because I've been so public and so such a vouching you know, zealot. I was like a fundamentalist personal growth junkie. Yeah. This is the way, this is the only way, red flag, to person to, you know, to grow and to reach enlightenment or whatever. Like. And so then on the other side, I had to be just as loud.So that was like one big stage, and I spent [00:19:00] like a long time just on the phone with people, trying to de enroll them, trying to explain like, yes, I was branded, and no, I didn't consent, and no, I didn't know it was Keith's initials, and like, trying to show them that it was bad. And for the people who are real diehards, there's some people who still don't think that was bad.Because they've, they've so committed their lives to this path. They're so bought in and to look now and go like, Oh, maybe this isn't good is just too hard for them. Like they're just, yeah, it's Katherine: just too much given to it and it's Sarah: just, yeah, it's easier to go. No, this was good. You know, Keith may have. I've heard them say you know, this is, maybe he's not conventional, but he always, he's a good person.Like they, they can't even fathom that maybe he's a bad person. So. That was one of the stages also was like just reallycoming to terms with like I lost so many of my of my good friends and I and I and I lost them [00:20:00] quickly. I lost them overnight. So that was a big part of it. Like leaving my community again because I had some community and friends outside of it. I think that was partly what saved me. I, you know, I hadn't burnt all my bridges, I'd burnt many bridges, for sure, but not all of them.Thankfully there were some friendships I never touched, I never tried to recruit, even though I did try to recruit many people. So I'd say all of, you know, that was a big stage. And then and then I got pregnant. I got pregnant with my second child a couple years after we got out as I was writing a book.And that was, I was, I was really working through and like having a big catharsis with that process. And having to also say no to, like, I was at that time I was going to do a Tedx talk and I was going to do a bunch of things. I was like, that's gonna be too stressful. And I want to like create a safe, loving incubator for my baby.And that kind of forced me to block out a lot of the stuff that I've been doing. There was like a sort of an ongoing campaign still to [00:21:00] expose and destroy and I mean, by say destroy, like, Make sure that nobody else was recruited into NXIVM and those things happen. Like NXIVM itself does no longer exist.There's no company. Are there people who still believe Keith is good? Yes. So I, that's part of the reason why I'm still talking because I want to get everybody out. . And then, and then, and then I'd say that like, I'm most, I think it's a lifelong healing journey, but there's a lot of things that I've done over the years that have really propelled me to another level of healing and yeah, having kids being kind of forced to stay present and not be in that war, that campaign pulled me to another stage.And then there's just lots of things I do for self care that I wasn't kind of, I wasn't allowed to do. It just wasn't a lot of time for it. Purpose probably. Yeah. On purpose. Yeah. And just like family time and being able to change my schedule and do things like You know, go to the farmer's markets on the [00:22:00] weekend and the old days when in the cult days that like there was never a free weekend, there was never every weekend if there was a free weekend where there wasn't a training and be like, Who should we fly out from the mothership to like, do a coach summit or, you know, oh, there's nothing happening.Let's organize a, you know, nationwide or citywide barbecue and like, it'll be a great enrollment opportunity. Like every weekend there was something going on with the You know, with my center and you know, three nights a week as well, Monday and Wednesday. And anyways, it was like always just go, go, go, go, go.So to be able to get my, you know, reclaim my time and, and like clear my schedule, which I think anyone is in any kind of group doesn't realize until they get out of something and they clear their schedule. They're like, wow, there's so much time devoted to this thing. Right. Katherine: Absolutely. And then probably like a reward for that time commitment is always more and always more and always pushing and, and, and to some extent that's just like wired into our our society.So when we get into a group that's like that, that just [00:23:00] feels so, so normal. It's like, that's just what you do in this group. I remember being in the, the abusive church and like. It was going through a lot and a lot of people were leaving and there would be these like events that we would have every year.And there were a few times where we were like looking around and we're like, we've lost staff. We are exhausted. Can we just not do this event? Can we just Not do this this year, because we're so tired and the leadership was like, it was always like, you know, PR move like no we have to pretend like everything is fine and you have to present like a united front to the, to the, you know, congregation and like having to like, you know, just kind of power through these events, and there wasn't this like posture of like what's best.For you and care. I mean, like want to like intentionally care for this community. That idea of like, no, we know what's best for you and we know what's best. And this is what what's best looks like and always moving and always pushing. [00:24:00] And yeah, just that, that's that environment that I think so many people can relate with, even like a work culture, you know, like, just like.Work cultures can be like that too. And I think it's safe for us to say, well, then that's an unhealthy work culture. We're allowed to say that, like, we don't have to just say, this is just normal. This is just the way it is. Like, no, we can say that's toxic. Like that's not a, not a helpful environment. Did you have any else thing else you wanted to say just about Impact on you, the CPTSD, PTSD, like how is that showing up for you? Sarah: Yeah, I mean, again, different stages. There was a time at the beginning where I couldn't sleep, I couldn't eat, I lost a ton of weight. I was just like, I was, Nippy called it sniper mode.We were just so hypervigilant. Yeah. I didn't know if we were being, you know, like, you know, spied on, if they were coming to get us. We just, yeah, we were a mess. That didn't last too, too long in the scheme of things, but I'm still a little [00:25:00] jumpy. Yeah. Like if, you know, it's so funny. I just said that my husband just made a loud nose in the kitchen and I was like, what was that?Like, you know, I've been broken into. So, you know, things like that. My trust in humanity is definitely restored. Like, it's amazing how, when we stepped away from that. That world, all these incredible people sort of showed up and you'd think maybe I wouldn't trust them right away. But I was like, I, I felt the difference to like a good versus, I wouldn't say bad person, but like, you know, I just, some, some angels showed up and kind of swooped us up and took really good care of us, especially the people that made the vow.Like that was a really wonderful experience and that impact of doing the vow. You know, that could have, that could have gone so many different ways. Like that could have, that could have been a shit show for us. And it wasn't. And like you said, you're, you and your friends were listening and watching going, have you seen the vow?I can tell you, I still get messages from people in all different groups and relationships, mostly things like different [00:26:00] religious offshoots or like particularly closed communities or like the Jehovah's witnesses, a ton of Mormons message, the Mormons especially were like, Oh my goodness, we were in lockdown watching tiger King.And then we were watching the vow and they're like, Holy shit, we're, you know, in a really not good situation. So that, that continues to be very rewarding for me. And, you know, I think that if had there not been so many silver linings from this experience. You know, I don't know if I would have like recovered like I, it was, it was such a, I didn't mention this before the betrayal, the betrayal wound is one of my, one of the things in my, my therapist, I call it therapist Dan Shaw helped me with and who's a, who's a narcissist expert really helped me see is that when you're people that you trust betray you on that level, it can be a wound that is, takes a while to heal.And these were like. People I considered family who knew what Keith was up to and they were lying to us. And that's something that I never, you know, [00:27:00] and I always say we underestimated people's capacity to lie. We just totally took things at face value. Oh, Keith is celibate. Oh, okay, cool. He doesn't need sex.Great. What are all these women around him? Oh, that's part of his team. Like, okay. mean, it's so obvious and I feel probably like I was very naive. Now, but, Katherine: and, yeah, I'm a trusting person, go into relationships thinking, oh, they're lying to me. Yeah. Most Sarah: people don't. Yeah. But I do, what I do know now, and I see in almost every group, there's some term for it, which is basically like in a group like ours and every, every group we've looked at, there's this sort of.Belief that it's okay to lie for the greater good, and it's okay to lie to protect the leader. Or, you know, for, there's some other greater reason it's okay to say, you know, no, we're not doing X, Y, and Z if it means to, to print like. The big picture. It's okay. The ends justify the means. Katherine: Yeah, that ends justify the mean things.Means [00:28:00] thing. You said that people came in like as you were leaving and kind of supported you and you said it felt different. Can you describe what that different feeling was? I mean, there was just no manipulation. Like I remember once having a conversation with, it wasn't even my therapist, just somebody who's a, who was a family friend who was a therapist. And I had shared briefly sort of what had happened and his first response was, wow, that sounds like.Sarah: That sounds really horrible. It sounds really hard. Mm-Hmm. And, and then I was like, whoa. Because in nex Im, if I shared, shared something that bad that had happened, the an the question would be, you know, well, how did you cause that? Mm-Hmm. , and you know, what, you know, or, or, or, how did you author that? Or, what's your responsibility in it?Mm-Hmm. . Or what's missing in you that you felt like you needed to create that? Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. So all that kind of bullshit was, really upsetting. Katherine: It sounds like they believed Sarah: [00:29:00] you. Yeah, they believed me. Yeah. And that's, that's the thing. And also, I had a lot of moments like that where I was like, whoa.That other way was actually really bad. And I had no idea how toxic it was until I was No longer dealt with that way. Katherine: Yeah. Yeah. And in the church world, it's called the, the, the reverse of that is like, well, what's your responsibility or, you know, why don't you give, or you're being bitter or you're angry or whatever.And then, and then they'll call that accountability and character development and, and it's framed as this like good thing. When it's just. Invalidation and bypassing. Sarah: Yeah, I definitely see that in almost every religion is that people are shamed into like to not express a concern because then they're then they're complaining or they're stinking thinking or it's negative or whatever.So they learn to not say it so there's no there's no place to bring forward a concern. And that's a that's a really that's a [00:30:00] really, you know, great protective mechanism for somebody who's a. Cult a hole. Do you know what I mean? Like, or somebody who's just being a, you know wants to abuse power or do bad things if there's no place for the people around them to, to question it or say, you know, is this good or is this bad?Then that's, that makes the, the clo we call it the closed loop system, right? Katherine: Mm-Hmm. . Yeah. And all of the accountability is like outward towards everyone else, but then that like, yeah. Leader or leadership doesn't, it doesn't, they don't play by the same rules, Sarah: like, right. Well, that, and that was something also that I saw as a consistent thing is that all of the dogma and, and, you know, there's like a lot of great truth to taking responsibility for things that happen in your life and that's, it can be a good thing, but if it's always.It's always your fault. And the other person didn't have any responsibility. Then, and that's, that's something I say all the time. Wait, especially in XM. There's no victims and you create everything in your life. Now, Keith is in jail. And he's the [00:31:00] victim. Like he's the victim of the like, Oh, the FBI plan. Oh, the FBI must have planted evidence.Oh, but, but Keith, how did you cause this? How did you get yourself into jail? Like, where is that? Where is it now? Where is it now? You know, and that, that's, that's such a huge inconsistency and inconsistencies are something that if you, you know, you bring up then you're. Not trusting the process or in the yoga communities, like you have resistance.What's with your resistance? Katherine: Oh my goodness. Wow. Yeah. Like the inconsistency thing in the as a, as a red flag is, is something that's It seems to happen a lot. And these groups, there's a, there's a double standard where there's between two different people or it's between the leadership and everyone else or whatever.That double standard inconsistency is definitely something that pops up I would love to hear from you just a little bit about. Recovery has been like, [00:32:00] and what are things that have helped you? Sarah: Again, different stages. I think the biggest part of my recovery at first was just talking about it and being with other X members and being able to speak freely without the shackles of the language constraints to be able to say, Oh, Oh, remember that time when so and so did this.That was a really mean thing to do. We never could have talked that way because that would have been. You know, breaking rank and, you know, all sorts of rules, broken images, expressing that way. And I didn't realize how suppressed I was. I couldn't go up line in my, in the authoritarian, you know, thing because they didn't get in trouble.And if I went down, that's bad leadership. So I was kind of like, you know, hogtied. I could talk to my husband, which is, I think, kind of a rare situation. And most people in my situation, we just couldn't talk to anybody. And also Mark Vicente, who was the person who brought me in. If you've seen The Vow, he's the director that.That brought me in, but also got me out. So speaking about it, and then you know, Reclaiming my time educating [00:33:00] myself. I did a lot of watching of other documentaries and podcasts and movies and all sorts of things that really helped me connect the dots. And I have notes from my early days of watching movies like going clear and Scientology or holy hell about Buddhafield and just seeing.Like, holy shit. This is the, it's, it's the exact same. Like really even in our podcast, every time we interview someone, it's like the, it's the exact same template. Yeah. I mean, some of the content, yeah, some of the content points. It always the same school and learned. We did the same school, even like with holy hell, the leaders doing this, forced ballet classes and with us it was volleyball.But it's the same kind of like obsession with this one thing. Physical, yeah. Just yes. And like, you got to get this thing right, but the performance and the adulation of the leader and all that stuff. So that was really helpful. And then there's a lot of things that I've done, I guess. So therapy wise at different stages, having an actual cult therapist was really helpful for me.And I saved a lot of time there because not only did he understand the dynamics, but he actually already knew [00:34:00] Nexium, which was great. So if I said, well, Nancy did this to me once, or Keith said this to me or whatever, he knew what I was talking about. Having a psychologist that didn't have cult training was laborious, but also really helpful because I would have to explain things that, that I realized, like, as, as explaining it, I was out of deprogramming myself.You know, in one particular moment I was saying to him, Oh, well, in our, in our belief system, we. Believed that needs were like survival based, you know, air, shelter, water, whatever. And anything else was considered a desire and therefore a non integrated fixation. You need to work on like, why did you think you needed this thing to be okay?Love, connection, community, blah, blah, blah. So then he, I remember, cause he didn't know anything about cults and he was like, well, those are needs to survive. But what about needs to thrive? And I was like, Oh, they didn't want us to thrive. And I always thought that the people in Albany who live there look fricking miserable.And I was like, [00:35:00] that's why they were miserable. They weren't allowed to have a career or relationship because then they were, they were shamed into like, that that was just a deficiency based desire. In other words, there's something wrong with you that you're even searching. Like, why do you even need that from the outside world to be complete?So that was you know, an interesting process to have a you know, a cult. A therapist and then a regular therapist, but I think a lot of my therapy came from just talking and educating myself and talking to other survivors. And then there's a whole series of things that I've done and continue to do.Like I'm, I do yoga, but I do like a not culty yoga. Like there's no dogma. There's no education. There's no leader. There's no, it's just more of like a fitness thing. Because that's how I protect myself, like I don't do kundalini or, yeah, like that. I walk a lot, you know, after this podcast, I will walk and, and like, clear my mind.Some like sort of spiritual, somebody, some might say woo woo practices that I do, but there's no It's not, it's not like a [00:36:00] tied to a certain school or program. It's just like a little practice here, a little practice there. I take my green juice. I'm very health oriented. I'm all about like getting good sleep and all the things that we weren't allowed.Like I remember when I started Nexium, I was They would say I have, I would have had an attachment to comfort because I was like, I'm getting my eight hours. And they're like, well, why do you think you need eight hours? And I'm like, well, that's just what, how I function best. And I'm like, why do you think that would if it's a limiting belief?And by the end of it, I was having like four or five hours of sleep a night to prove to them how much sleep I didn't need and how I could be like such a bad ass, you know, but really I do need, like I, I do best on as much sleep as I possibly can get. So prioritizing that and prioritizing what's right for me and not going with somebody else.Going on what somebody else says is right for me has been also huge. A lot of baths. I take Epsom salt baths for my CPTSD almost every night. Putting a lot of money on hot water. I'm sure. Katherine: Hey, it's very sensory and it like, yeah, it's you and [00:37:00] your body. It helps you be present. It's Sarah: yes. Yes. And you could cut this out if you want, but I also microdose psilocybin a fair bit, which also does, does all of those things keeps me, my body has to be present.I don't get, I'm not doing it to hallucinate or get high on mushrooms, but it just helps me not be anxious. Yes. So yeah, that's, that's kind of, those are my main, lots of variety. Yeah. Lots of variety. And oh, and hiking, I like love being in nature and that's like super important to me. I try to get out at least once a week.Katherine: What would you say this is something that like is I think just like a constant question that a lot of folks have and something that I'm, I'm kind of exploring as well is like the difference between having someone help you like a therapist and like that language versus a guru who was like telling you what to do and like, what does it feel like to have that difference.Or what does that difference feel like? [00:38:00] Sarah: Yeah, I'd say that that like a healthy therapist feels like they're on a journey with me and they're just, , questioning and , it's like they're going down in the cave with me. We're both shining lights and we're looking together. Whereas the, the guru approach or, you know, like an axiom, I always felt like there was literally like a.Such a power power difference. Like I'm sitting down here and they would be sitting up there like even the seats were raised and we're kind of looking up at and tell me what to do, like, what do you think and Reclaiming that has been definitely been a huge part of my healing.Katherine: Yeah, so the guru is more like the expert Mm hmm or life telling you how to do it Sarah: And I have to be so careful with that too, because I do love to give people unsolicited advice. You know, especially in our podcast. I do like to be Katherine: like, that's not a good thing. Don't do this. Sarah: And I'm like, you really need to be taking more baths.Okay. I'm just kidding. But I'm like, well, what, how do I try to phrase it now? I was like, this is what's worked [00:39:00] for me. This is what works for me. And you can do whatever you want. I don't care. Katherine: Yeah, no, I like the phraseology. I have to do the same thing. It's like, well, you know, I have that same situation and this is what I try.Yeah. Do with that what you'll exactly. Yeah. And then that would be as opposed to someone who is like, partnering with you in this journey and, and just like being empathetic to the experience rather than telling Yes. That they know better what you need than you do. Yes. Yeah. Exactly. I love that.That's great. Any, any final things that you would like to share as we wrap up put all of your information in the show notes, but if you have any information that you want to give folks about how to interact with you, Sarah: I mean, I'd say like if they want to know the full story, my book in combination with the vow, I think is a really good balance because the vow has my story, but also massive gaps in some things that happen.But the vow [00:40:00] has a lot of other people's stories. And if you want to go down an axiom rabbit hole, there's tons of other memoirs out there. But I think that our podcast I've, I've been told is very therapeutic for people of all different groups, religions you know, even abuse situations because you're hearing the stories from different, different people's perspectives that.You're not maybe necessarily as attached to like defending or being protective of your group, whatever that is. So when you hear when other people's stories, you're like, Oh yeah, I relate to that. And it can be, well, it's free. It's free therapy. So not that it's not in lieu of therapy. I'm not saying like, don't do therapy, but it's gonna be a bonus.And I also say, like, there's some episodes that will resonate and some that won't. Just skip them. You don't have, you don't have to listen to all of them. If it's something that that, that is resonant for people, there's a, we're also on Patreon and we do a lot, we do another bonus episode every week.And that's more casual. And we answer questions from the audience. We do voicemails. And we also have a Goodreads account. I recommend a lot of books [00:41:00] and I interview a lot of authors. So all of the books that we love are on our little bit culty Goodreads account. And I think the best way if you want to just reach out to me personally is on my Instagram.I, I answer every message. A little bit culty is a little bit backlogged, but people can check us out there as well. And if they want to be a guest, a little bit culty, they can apply through our website. Oh, the one thing I would say also that's really cool, I think that I did recently is a TEDx talk.I don't know if you had a chance to see it or hear it. Yeah. It's 15 minutes of like the summary of why people need to educate themselves about cults. It's very, it's like a lot. It's like some people call it the best of a little bit culty in a very short period of time. So it's a lot of quick nuggets.Yeah. And I think, I think your community would like it. Katherine: That sounds good. I might reach out to you. I might reach out to you later about that because a couple of years ago I had talked to someone about doing a TEDx talk about spiritual abuse and they kind of discouraged me from [00:42:00] it because it's supposed to be inspirational and it didn't, they're like, Sarah: that's inspirational.Well TEDx actually has some kind of like a little bit quality rules. Like you can't talk about politics or religion. Okay. It's in, it's in their rule book. But. So talking about spiritual abuse, I don't know how you would frame it in a different way. You have to frame it in a different way. Yeah. Go ahead and talk about spiritual bypassing and just not mention religion.Ah, Katherine: yeah, that's true. True, true, true. Cool. Well, thank you so much for giving us your time. I'm excited to just see what, see what develops. Thank you for all the work Sarah: that you're doing. My absolute pleasure. It's, it's a total joy to talk about and I will continue to talk about it until everybody is out.So everyone. Yes. Free the slaves. Katherine: Free the slaves.

We've been teasing this episode for awhile and here it finally is! Sarah Edmonson is a survivor of and whistleblower for the NXIVM cult. She now hosts the podcast A Little Bit Culty with her husband and fellow NXIVM whistleblower Nippy Aims, where they discuss cults and coercive groups with survivors and experts. She also wrote the bestselling book Scarred: The True Story of How I Escaped NXIVM, the Cult that Bound My Life!This week, she's here to talk with Ash and Alex about how NXIVM compares to Scientology! They also play cult bingo, and Sarah and Alex discuss how they "sold their cults"!Find Alex on his YouTube channel!Support the channel: https://www.buymeacoffee.com/apostate...

Sarah Edmondson has been a working actor for 25+ years, but she is most well-known for her real-life role in the downfall of the notorious NXIVM cult.In 2019, Sarah published Scarred: The True Story of How I Escaped NXIVM, the Cult that Bound My Life, an acclaimed memoir chronicling her harrowing experience. Her story as a whistleblower has also been featured in the CBC podcast “Uncover: Escaping NXIVM” and “The Vow”, the critically-acclaimed HBO documentary series.In 2021, Sarah launched the A Little Bit Culty podcast with her husband Anthony ‘Nippy' Ames, on a mission to shine much-needed light on issues of cultic abuse and undue influence. With nearly 5M downloads to date and guests like Eckhart Tolle and Leah Remini, it has become a powerful platform and connective space for cult-survivors, recovery advocates, and mind-control experts alike.A mom of two boys, Sarah continues to work as an actor and podcaster from her home in Atlanta while making time to attend conferences and events around the world as a speaker and cult-recovery advocate.

*This episode was first published February 5th 2022.*Sarah and Nippy were in the NXIVM (said Nexium) cult for 12 and 16 years respectively. In early 2017, Sarah was invited into a secret women's sect of the cult called DOS. She was asked to strip naked, was blindfolded and led into a room with several other women. She was then instructed to repeat the words "Master, would you brand me? It would be an honour" and she was branded with the cult leaders initials. It wasn't long after, that Sarah and Nippy along with a small band of close friends, blew the whistle and alerted the media and authorities about the crimes of Keith Raniere. He ended up being sentenced to 120 years in prison for sex trafficking and racketeering charges, among others.In this episode, I spoke to Sarah and Nippy about their experiences within the cult, how they got out and how they have begun their healing process to regain their lives and families. They now have a podcast called A Little Bit Culty, where they speak to cult experts, whistleblowers and other cult survivors.If you or someone you love are in a high control group otherwise known as a cult, check out the links below for resources that will be helpful to you. Otherwise check out the docuseries, The Vow, on HBO (or Foxtel and Binge in Australia) or check out Sarah's book, Scarred: The True Story of How I Escaped NXIVM, The Cult That Bound My Life. Web Resources:www.sarahedmondson.com/rescourceswww.igotout.orgwww.alittlebitculty.comSocial Media:Instagram: @alittlebitculty @igotout_orgFacebook: @alittlebitculty @igotout

*Content warning: This episode includes discussion of coercive control, cults, cultic abuse, branding, emotional, physical, and sexual abuse, rape, & sex slavery. Sarah Edmondson is an actor, author, podcaster, victim advocate, & mother who has appeared in many publications and productions, including HBO's The Vow. She found her passion for the performing arts at a young age, and has seen great success in front of the camera. Her roles in front of them have drastically shifted over the last decade though; she now uses the spotlight to share her experiences in NXIVM. Sarah was tested to her limits by her journey within the multi-level marketing sex cult, and we are so grateful she was willing to talk to us about how she's turned what came next for her into education for the masses. Sponsors: Thank you, BetterHelp, for sponsoring this episode. Don't forget to visit http://www.betterhelp.com/wcn for 10% off your first month of services. Sources: Sarah's Cultic Abuse & Coercive Control Resources: https://www.sarahedmondson.com/resources Sarah's Instagram:  http://www.instagram.com/sarahedmondson A Little But Culty on Instagram: https://instagram.com/alittlebitculty Sarah's podcast, A Little Bit Culty: https://alittlebitculty.com/ Sarah's Book, Scarred: The True Story of How I Escaped NXIVM, the Cult That Bound My Life https://amzn.to/3RwmmY2 NY Times on NXIVM 10/17/17 https://www.nytimes.com/2017/10/17/nyregion/nxivm-women-branded-albany.html HBO's The Vow https://www.hbo.com/the-vow Psychology Today, Understanding the Basics of Cults: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/freedom-mind/202106/understanding-cults-the-basics Combatting Cult Mind Control by Steven Hassan https://amzn.to/3BaCQz Insider.com on the Legal Progression of the NXIVM trials: https://www.insider.com/what-is-nxivm-keith-raniere-explainer-2019-4#june-30-2021-allison-mack-was-sentenced-to-3-years-in-prison-27 I Got Out Movement http://igotout.org Cult Info Since 1979 via International Cultic Studies Association https://www.icsahome.com/articles/prevalence For free and confidential resources, please visit: somethingwaswrong.com/resources 

If you've ever said "I could never be conned into a cult!" Listen up! You may be more vulnerable than you think. After 12 years in a cult Canadian actor Sarah Edmondson fought her way out. Once she was out, along with others, knew exposing the group was the right thing to do. It wasn't easy but they did it. Today she shares her story: how she got started, why she stayed, and what made her "wake up" to the realities. She does this in her book "Scarred: The True Story of How I Escaped NXIVM" and on her podcast, "A Little Bit Culty," with her husband. She brings levity to the subject, helps identify red flags for a variety of high-control groups, and advocates for cult recovery. *CW: Discussion of cult culture and sexual coercionSarah's resource page: sarahedmondson.com/resources Follow along on with Sarah Edmondson: @sarahedmondson _______Check out all of the MOM2MOM episodes: nbcboston.com/mom-2-momFollow along on social: @thehubtoday & @mariasansone------Sign up for The Hubbub: nbcboston.com/newslettersFind a list of eligible projects for "Supporting Our Schools": nbcboston.com/schoolsSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

In Part 2 Sarah Edmondson's story, we see how the truth slowly starts to unfold. Sarah realizes that Keith Raniere, Nancy Salzman, and NXIVM were abusing many of its female members. For the first time, Sarah sees the horrible truth about the organization, and how Keith was actually sexually abusing women behind closed doors. When Sarah was tricked into joining DOS, more insidious events unfold all around NXIVM, which lead to Sarah taking action to protect herself and the women around her. Listen to how Sarah's whistleblowing finally started the beginning of the end of NXIVM. Host Information:  Instagram: Dr Ramani's IG - @doctorramani Facebook: Dr Ramani's FB - @doctorramani Twitter: Dr Ramani's TW - @DoctorRamani  YouTube: Dr. Ramani's YT - DoctorRamani Guest Information: Instagram: Sarah Edmondson's IG - @sarahedmondson Facebook: Sarah Edmondson's FB - Sarah Edmondson  Twitter: Sarah Edmondson's TW - @sarahjedmondson  Book: Scarred Podcast: A Little Bit Culty  Guest Bio:  Sarah is a working actor and artist. She is known for her role in NXIVM; which initially intrigued her with its promise to provide the tools and insight she needed to reach her potential. It all came into focus when she accepted an invitation to join DOS, a “secret sisterhood” within NXIVM. It was a decision that resulted in a front page bombshell in the New York Times featuring her story as a woman on a mission to shut NXIVM down. Sarah published Scarred: The True Story of How I Escaped NXIVM, the Cult that Bound My Life. Sarah's journey as a whistleblower has also been featured in “The Vow”, the critically acclaimed HBO documentary series.  I want to hear from you, too. Have a toxic topic you want me to explore? Email me at askdrramani@redtabletalk.com I just might answer you questions on air.  This podcast should not be used as a substitute for medical or mental health advice. Individuals are advised to seek independent medical advice, counseling, and/or therapy from a health care professional with respect to any medical condition, mental health issue, or health inquiry, including matters discussed on this podcast. Navigating Narcissism is produced by Red Table Talk Podcasts. EXECUTIVE PRODUCERS: Jada Pinkett-Smith, Fallon Jethroe, Ellen Rakieten, and Dr. Ramani Durvasula. Also, PRODUCER: Matthew Jones, ASSOCIATE PRODUCER: Mara De La Rosa. EDITORS AND AUDIO MIXERS: Devin Donaghy and Calvin Bailiff.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Sarah Edmondson was a young actress pursuing a career in film and television, when she hit a low point and was hoping to find a new purpose in life. She ran into renowned filmmaker, Mark Vicente, who spoke to her about NXIVM and eventually brought her into the organization. There she started following Keith Raniere and Nancy Salzman's mission. They encouraged Sarah to give her all. In part 1 of 2, we learn about how NXIVM's leadership undermined its followers and groomed them in such a conniving way, that no one knew what was happening to them. Sarah grew close to many members of the organization - which later turned out to be a cult, and even rose up in leadership. Listen to how Sarah's journey and newfound community helped her find a new meaning in life. Host Information:  Instagram: Dr Ramani's IG - @doctorramani Facebook: Dr Ramani's FB - @doctorramani Twitter: Dr Ramani's TW - @DoctorRamani  YouTube: Dr. Ramani's YT - DoctorRamani Guest Information: Instagram: Sarah Edmondson's IG - @sarahedmondson Facebook: Sarah Edmondson's FB - Sarah Edmondson  Twitter: Sarah Edmondson's TW - @sarahjedmondson  Book: Scarred Podcast: A Little Bit Culty  Guest Bio:  Sarah is a working actor and artist. She is known for her role in NXIVM; which initially intrigued her with its promise to provide the tools and insight she needed to reach her potential. It all came into focus when she accepted an invitation to join DOS, a “secret sisterhood” within NXIVM. It was a decision that resulted in a front page bombshell in the New York Times featuring her story as a woman on a mission to shut NXIVM down. Sarah published Scarred: The True Story of How I Escaped NXIVM, the Cult that Bound My Life. Sarah's journey as a whistleblower has also been featured in “The Vow”, the critically acclaimed HBO documentary series.  I want to hear from you, too. Have a toxic topic you want me to explore? Email me at askdrramani@redtabletalk.com   I just might answer you questions on air.  This podcast should not be used as a substitute for medical or mental health advice. Individuals are advised to seek independent medical advice, counseling, and/or therapy from a health care professional with respect to any medical condition, mental health issue, or health inquiry, including matters discussed on this podcast. Navigating Narcissism is produced by Red Table Talk Podcasts. EXECUTIVE PRODUCERS: Jada Pinkett-Smith, Fallon Jethroe, Ellen Rakieten, and Dr. Ramani Durvasula. Also, PRODUCER: Matthew Jones, ASSOCIATE PRODUCER: Mara De La Rosa. EDITORS AND AUDIO MIXERS: Devin Donaghy and Calvin Bailiff.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Sarah Edmondson (@sarahjedmondson) and Anthony "Nippy" Ames (@nippyames) are two former NXIVM cult members turned whistleblowers. Together, they host the podcast A Little Bit Culty, and are featured in HBO's series The Vow. Sarah's 12-year ordeal is chronicled in Scarred: The True Story of How I Escaped NXIVM, the Cult That Bound My Life. [This is part two of a two-part conversation. Find part one here!] What We Discuss with Sarah Edmondson and Nippy Ames: How NXIVM began as a community of like-minded individuals who were committed to personal growth and self-improvement and devolved into a cult under the leadership of its narcissistic founder, Keith Raniere. How Hollywood celebrities came to be courted and ultimately controlled by Raniere and the NXIVM cult. The endless abuses suffered by NXIVM's victims — from mind games to being branded as property and trafficked as a way to fund Raniere's lavish lifestyle. Where Sarah and Nippy existed within NXIVM's hierarchy, the parts they played, and what broke the spell that held them enthralled in the cult's sinister machinations. How Sarah and Nippy are coping with the aftermath of their traumatic experiences, and what they're doing to raise awareness of how cults like NXIVM ruin people's lives. And much more... Full show notes and resources can be found here: jordanharbinger.com/771 Sign up for Six-Minute Networking — our free networking and relationship development mini course — at jordanharbinger.com/course! Like this show? Please leave us a review here — even one sentence helps! Consider including your Twitter handle so we can thank you personally!

Sarah Edmondson (@sarahjedmondson) and Anthony "Nippy" Ames (@nippyames) are two former NXIVM cult members turned whistleblowers. Together, they host the podcast A Little Bit Culty, and are featured in HBO's series The Vow. Sarah's 12-year ordeal is chronicled in Scarred: The True Story of How I Escaped NXIVM, the Cult That Bound My Life. [This is part one of a two-part conversation. Stay tuned for part two later this week!] What We Discuss with Sarah Edmondson and Nippy Ames: How NXIVM began as a community of like-minded individuals who were committed to personal growth and self-improvement and devolved into a cult under the leadership of its narcissistic founder, Keith Raniere. How Hollywood celebrities came to be courted and ultimately controlled by Raniere and the NXIVM cult. The endless abuses suffered by NXIVM's victims — from mind games to being branded as property and trafficked as a way to fund Raniere's lavish lifestyle. Where Sarah and Nippy existed within NXIVM's hierarchy, the parts they played, and what broke the spell that held them enthralled in the cult's sinister machinations. How Sarah and Nippy are coping with the aftermath of their traumatic experiences, and what they're doing to raise awareness of how cults like NXIVM ruin people's lives. And much more... Full show notes and resources can be found here: jordanharbinger.com/770 Sign up for Six-Minute Networking — our free networking and relationship development mini course — at jordanharbinger.com/course! Like this show? Please leave us a review here — even one sentence helps! Consider including your Twitter handle so we can thank you personally!

This is the last in the current season and i hope you have enjoyed the guests that have joined me :)Today's episode I caught up with Sarah for the second time and we discussed NXIVM, her podcast and the second season of The Vow. I loved speaking with Sarah again and I hope that you enjoy our conversation.Checkout the links below for more info on SarahSarah Edmondson is a Canadian actress and podcaster. Edmondson is a former member of NXIVM, a multi-level marketing company co-founded by Keith Raniere. In 2017, she left the group and confirmed longstanding criticism that NXIVM operated as a cult. The resulting New York Times exposé of NXIVM's abusive practices precipitated the downfall of the organisation and its leaders.A Little Bit Culty with Sarah and Nippy.Scarred: The True Story of How I Escaped NXIVM, the Cult That Bound My Life: Edmondson, Sarah, Gasbarre, Kristine: 9781452184265: Amazon.com: Books Get bonus content on Patreon Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Continuing with cult month, today we are diving into the world of NXIVM where we welcome two survivors turned whistleblowers of a very famous cult masked as an MLM company. NXIVM became widely known during their high profile RICO case involving celebrities, billionaire heiresses, and the FBI. This week on Almost Adulting, Violet speaks with Sarah Edmondson and Anthony “Nippy” Ames, hosts of A Little Bit Culty podcast and former members of NXIVM. Founded by Keith Raniere, NXIVM posed themselves as a self-improvement group, only to later be exposed as a “sex cult” by extorting, sex trafficking, and implementing force labor upon its members. Sarah and Nippy open up about the details of how they were lured into NXIVM, what it was like on the inside, and the horrifying secrets they discovered after Sarah was forcibly branded. Sarah and Nippy tell the story of how they were integral to the downfall of NXIVM and the arrest of its leaders. The couple is also recently featured in HBO's The Vow, a documentary diving into the world of NXIVM, and Sarah is also the author of Scarred: The True Story of How I Escaped NXIVM, the Cult That Bound My Life.TW: sexual abuseCOME TO MY SHOW AT THE HOLLYWOOD IMPROV ON OCT. 24! BUY TICKETS HERE: https://improv.com/comic/violet+benson/ THIS WEEK'S PODCAST IS BROUGHT TO YOU BY:Dave: Download the Dave app to get the financial relief they need with ExtraCash.Athletic Greens: http://www.athleticgreens.com/VIOLETBENSONAdvertise with Almost Adulting at Gumball.fm What to Listen For:00:00 Introduction01:06 What is NXIVM?02:24 All cults have a mission of ‘saving the world'07:54 “That will not happen to me.”10:28 Why is it important for cults to isolate themselves?12:38 NXIVM is a personality cult17:22 How did it become an MLM cult?23:39 Ranking within the cult27:56 Feeling guilty for recruiting people33:04 The women sub-group: DOS42:12 When women take advantage of other women45:11 Triggering the downfall of the cult48:10 Removing the branding49:56 Are there any people right now that should be in jail? Connect with Sarah and Nippy on:A Little Bit CultyScarred: The True Story of How I Escaped NXIVM, the Cult That Bound My LifeSarah EdmondsonAnthony AmesGet more content on:@almostadulting on Instagram@violetbenson on Instagram@daddyissues_ on InstagramYouTubeSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Sarah Edmundson and Anthony "Nippy" Ames are survivors of the NXIVM cult and hosts of the A Little Bit Culty Podcast. They are the married couple and whistleblowers documented in the critically-acclaimed HBO series “The Vow,” Sarah and Nippy have a lot to say about their experience, and burning questions to ask people with similar stories. They're here to help people understand, heal from, and avoid abusive situations one little red flag at a time. Sarah and Nippy are also both successful actors and producers. In 2019, Sarah published Scarred: The True Story of How I Escaped NXIVM, the Cult that Bound My Life. In this moving and insightful conversation Sarah and Nippy look back at their intensely dramatic time as a part of NXIVM, exploring the missteps and courageous actions they took along the way. The couple share with Rachel the uniquely complex relationship dynamics they experienced while in the group and the powerful love and devotion that kept them together. They explain how their relationship offered them the strength needed to leave and ultimately put an end to NXIVM and Keith Ranerie's destructive abuses. Before You Go: Rachel explores NXIVM's idea of inner deficiency, comparing the problematic diagnostic techniques found in some therapeutic practices to the manipulative narratives used by cult leaders. For more info on Sarah and Nippy's podcast visit: https://www.alittlebitculty.com/ Find more about Sarah's book here: https://www.sarahedmondson.com/ You can listen to our previous episodes on NXIVM here: https://soundcloud.com/indoctrinationshow/sets/nxivm Thanks to all of our newest Patreon supporters: Jamie Gunning, Brett Jellen, Gabrielle Coleman, Danielle Hirokane, Jena Higdon, Rebecca Sigel, Cecilia, The New Inquiry, Kymberley Alberts Sauer, Kristen King, Elizabeth Wolfington, Ryan Pence, Amanda Smith, Julia Colmenero-Skeaff, Niamh McGee, Jo A Gardner and, Amber Berger To help support the show monthly and get bonus episodes, shirts, and tote bags, please visit: www.patreon.com/indoctrination Prefer to support the IndoctriNation show with a one-time donation? Use this link: www.paypal.me/indoctrination You can help the show for free by leaving a rating on Spotify or Apple/ iTunes. It really helps the visibility of the show!

What a treat to start our season 2 with A Little Bit Culty podcast hosts (and NXIVM cult survivors) Sarah Edmonson and Nippy Ames! Sarah Edmondson is a Canadian actress who has starred in the CBS series Salvation and more than twelve films for the Hallmark Channel and Lifetime. She is also a well-established voice-over artist for popular series such as Transformers: Cybertron and My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic. In 2005, when NXIVM, a personal and professional development company, promised to provide the tools and insight Sarah needed to reach her potential, she was intrigued. Over her twelve-year tenure, she went from student to coach and eventually operated her own NXIVM center in Vancouver. Questions kept coming up about the organization's rules and practices, which came to a head in 2017 when she accepted an invitation from her best friend to join DOS, a “secret sisterhood” within NXIVM. In 2019, Sarah published Scarred: The True Story of How I Escaped NXIVM, the Cult that Bound My Life, with Kristine Gasbarre. In this tell-all memoir, she shares her story from the moment she takes her first seminar to her harrowing fight to get out. Her full story as a whistleblower is featured in the CBC podcast Uncover: Escaping NXIVM (downloaded over 25 million times) and The Vow, the critically acclaimed HBO documentary series on NXIVM. Now with the launch of “A Little Bit Culty,” Sarah and her co-host/husband Anthony “Nippy” Ames are keeping the conversation going by discussing the healing process with the help of experts and fellow survivors. As an aspiring actor and former college athlete, Anthony “Nippy” Ames was drawn to NXIVM's goals program. In his 12 years with the organization, he rose steadily up the ranks as a teacher, built centers in New York and Vancouver, and even met his now wife, “A Little Bit Culty” co-host Sarah Edmondson there. But when he learned that the company was, in fact, a dangerous cult, he wasted no time in doing exactly what needed to be done: helping burn its carefully constructed public image to the ground. With NXIVM's notorious founder now behind bars facing a brisk 120-year sentence, Nippy isn't planning on going quiet anytime soon. As Executive Producer of the “A Little Bit Culty” podcast, Nippy has come full circle back to what he was born to do: performing, creating, and truth telling. He's proving to be an emerging voice in the conversation around what it means to be an upstanding man, husband, and father in 2021.

*TRIGGER WARNING* This episode includes subjects of sexual, mental and physical abuse. Join me today as Sarah shares with us her story of escaping NXIVM and exposing the cult leader. Sarah Edmondson is a Canadian actress and playwright who has starred in the CBS series Salvation and more than twelve films for the Hallmark Channel and Lifetime. She is also a well-established voice-over artist for popular series such as Transformers: Cybertron and My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic. In 2005, when NXIVM, a personal and professional development company, promised to provide the tools and insight Sarah needed to reach her potential, she was intrigued. Over her twelve-year tenure, she went from student to coach and eventually operated her own NXIVM center in Vancouver. Questions kept coming up about the organization's rules and practices, which came to a head in 2017 when she accepted an invitation from her best friend to join DOS, a “secret sisterhood” within NXIVM.In 2019, Sarah published Scarred: The True Story of How I Escaped NXIVM, the Cult that Bound My Life, with Kristine Gasbarre. In this tell-all memoir, she shares her story from the moment she takes her first seminar to her harrowing fight to get out of NXIVM, collaborate with the FBI, help others, and heal.Sarah's full story as a whistleblower is featured in the CBC podcast “Uncover: Escaping NXIVM” (downloaded over 25 million times) and “The Vow”, the critically acclaimed HBO documentary series on NXIVM.Now with the launch of her own podcast, “A Little Bit Culty,” Sarah is keeping the conversation going by exploring the fads, beliefs, and trends that blur the line between devotion and dysfunction. Co-hosted by her husband and fellow NXIVM whistleblower Anthony “Nippy” Ames, the podcast is part conversational coffee date and part deep dive on everything from Waco to lululemon. And while there was nothing small about Sarah's cult experience, “A Little Bit Culty” is grounded in her mission to help people understand, heal from, and avoid abusive situations, one little red flag at a time.Find Sarah on IG @sarahedmondson @alittlebitculty @igotout_org Follow the #igotout❇️Get her book here https://www.sarahedmondson.com/book✳️Check out her amazing list of resources https://www.sarahedmondson.com/resources❇️ Listen to her Podcast https://www.alittlebitculty.com/ Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Sarah Edmondson and Anthony “Nippy” Ames are former members of the NXIVM cult but today are some of the most visible whistleblowers of the cult. They host the popular podcast “A Little Bit Culty,” and Sarah is the author of “Scarred: The True Story of How I Escaped NXIVM, the Cult That Bound My Life.” In this wide-ranging conversation, we talk about NXIVM and the attributes we also find in other cults. We talk about human trafficking (what NXIVM cult leader Keith Raniere was convicted of) and how intelligent, educated people can fall victim to a cult leader. Learn more about Dr. Steven Hassan's work and find more resources at his website FreedomOfMind.com. Follow Dr. Hassan on Twitter here. Remember to subscribe to ALL the Meidas Media Podcasts: MeidasTouch: https://pod.link/1510240831 Legal AF: https://pod.link/1580828595 The PoliticsGirl Podcast: https://pod.link/1595408601 The Influence Continuum: https://pod.link/1603773245 Kremlin File: https://pod.link/1575837599 Mea Culpa with Michael Cohen: https://pod.link/1530639447 Zoomed In: https://pod.link/1580828633 The Weekend Show: https://pod.link/1612691018 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Many of you may know Sarah and Nippy from Season 1 of The Vow, the critically acclaimed HBO documentary series on NXIVM. The Vow shows real time and historical footage of the group and documents Sarah and Nippy, amidst others, revealing the emotional toll of unfolding events that transpire and the bravery of this core group that's resulted in the NXIVM leader, Keith Raniere, being convicted of sex trafficking, racketeering conspiracy, and other crimes. Season 2 of The Vow is set to release in October 2022.  Sarah's memoir on this topic is called Scarred: The True Story of How I Escaped NXIVM, the Cult that Bound My Life. In it, she shares her story from the moment she takes her first seminar to her harrowing fight to get out of NXIVM, collaborate with the FBI, help others, and heal. Sarah and Nippy are also actors. You can find Sarah on the Hallmark Channel and Nippy's latest appearance on the Good Doctor. You can also join Sarah and Nippy at SXSW this March of 2022. They will be doing a live show of their podcast, A Little Bit Culty. If you haven't checked it out, please do… Sarah and Nippy host survivors, experts,  and help their audience understand, heal from, and avoid abusive situations, one little red flag at a time. In this discussion, Sarah and Nippy share about their family dynamics both during and post NXIVM amidst other related topics! Join us! Check out A Little Bit Culty: https://www.alittlebitculty.com/ For more on Sarah's book, Scarred: https://www.sarahedmondson.com/book Join Sarah & Nippy at SXSW 2022: https://schedule.sxsw.com/2022/events/PP119952 Check out The Vow: https://www.hbo.com/the-vow Jennifer is a mental health counselor located in the Los Angeles area, using Internal Family Systems (IFS) as the primary modality of psychotherapy that she uses with clients. Jennifer will graduate with her second Masters degree in 2022 in the Psychology of Coercive Control. She works both across the US and internationally with those seeking insight and healing. For more information, please visit her website, Jennifer-French.com. Follow Jennifer on social media at:Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/jennifermonica.holcomb Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/jennifer.french.jfh/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCr6Ufd0I7My6dumbTpQwn8A/playlists If you would like to be on the Project Hope Podcast or have any inquiries regarding the show, please email, projecthopepodcast@jennifer-french.com.

Sarah and Nippy were in the NXIVM (said Nexium) cult for 12 and 16 years respectively. In early 2017, Sarah was invited into a secret women's sect of the cult called DOS. She was asked to strip naked, was blindfolded and led into a room with several other women. She was then instructed to repeat the words "Master, would you brand me? It would be an honour" and she was branded with the cult leaders initials. It wasn't long after, that Sarah and Nippy along with a small band of close friends, blew the whistle and alerted the media and authorities about the crimes of Keith Raniere. He ended up being sentenced to 120 years in prison for sex trafficking and racketeering charges among others. In this episode, I spoke to Sarah and Nippy about their experiences within the cult, how they got out and how they have begun their healing process to regain their lives and families. They now have a podcast in its 3rd season called A Little Bit Culty, where they speak to cult experts, whistleblowers and other cult survivors. If you or someone you love are in a high control group otherwise known as a cult, check out the links below for resources that will be helpful to you. Otherwise check out the docuseries, The Vow, on HBO (or Foxtel and Binge in Australia) or check out Sarah's book, Scarred: The True Story of How I Escaped NXIVM, The Cult That Bound My Life. Web Resources: www.sarahedmondson.com/rescources www.igotout.org www.alittlebitculty.com Social Media: Instagram: @alittlebitculty                 @igotout_org Facebook: @alittlebitculty                 @igotout

The book is called SCARRED: The True Story of How I Escaped NXIVM The Cult That Bound My Life. It's written by Sarah Edmondson with Kristine Gasbarre. It's a memoir of Sarah Edmondson's entry into, experiences in, and exit from the NXIVM cult. References you'll hear about in the review: The Vow documentary on HBO Bounded Choice by Dr. Janja Lalich Recommended Reading page on Dr. Lalich's website If you're interested in the cult studies, memoirs, and organizational leadership, consider this book. --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/drshaunta-scroggins/message

We have something very special for our 50th episode: an interview with Sarah Edmondson, the actress and podcast host who escaped Nxivm. Featured on HBO's The Vow, Nxivm is a group organization that claims to be a personal and professional development program, but has been discovered as a cult that recruits for a secret society called "DOS" in which women are sexually exploited. Sarah describes her experiences in Nxivm and DOS, the journey to realizing the true nature of organization, and her process of healing after her departure. Resources: "A Little Bit Culty" Podcast and Sarah's Memoir: "Scarred: The True Story of How I Escaped NXIVM the Cult that Bound My Life."For more info, check out: www.alittlehelpforourfriends.comFollow us on Instagram: @ALittleHelpForOurFriends

Sarah Edmondson and Nippy Ames are subjects of HBO's documentary series The Vow, a story of indoctrination and exposing the NXIVM cult, and hosts of the podcast A Little Bit Culty. I am delighted to have Sarah and Nippy join me for a "part 2" conversation that begins on A Little Bit Culty today! One of my goals is that both of our extreme experiences be relatable to new age and self help consumers.  Take away the branding and sex trafficking of NXIVM, and the head shaving and fatal sweat lodge of my experience, and what remains is a seemingly regular self help organization. Maybe it is. Maybe it's a cult. Maybe it's both. One thing is certain: Our hindsight can become your foresight. Listen as we explore sales and recruitment tactics, coercion, the mind-fuck of "at-causedness," and "the NXIVM flip," which you'll find everywhere in new age and self help circles, masquerading as personal responsibility and looking to yourself as the creator of everything in your life, including narcissistic and cult abuse. Sarah Edmondson is a Canadian actress who has stared in the CBS series Salvation and more than twelve films for the Hallmark Channel and Lifetime. In 2019, Sarah published Scarred: The True Story of How I Escaped NXIVM, the Cult that Bound My Life. Nippy Ames has come full circle back to what he was born to do: performing, creating, and truth telling. He's proving to be an emerging voice in the conversation around what it means to be an upstanding man, husband, and father in 2021. Sarah and Nippy discuss their healing process with the help of experts and fellow survivors on their podcast A Little Bit Culty. Mentioned in this episode: 2 ways to win Sarah's memoir: Write a review of Free Your Inner Guru - quick links here: freeyourinnerguru.com/reviewBecome a Patreon supporter at patreon.com/freeyourinnerguru Draw to be held on Instagram Live - December 30 at noon ET Books: Scarred: The True Story of How I Escaped NXIVM, the Cult that Bound My Life, Sarah EdmondsonTake Back Your Life: Recovering from Cults and Abusive Relationships, Janja LalichDon't Call It a Cult, Sarah Berman Connect with Sarah and Nippy online: Podcast & website: A Little Bit CultyInstagram - @alittlebitculty @sarahedmondson @anthonyames11 Connect with Free Your Inner Guru: Become a Patreon Supporter – patreon.com/freeyourinnerguruJoin the Leadership Community – freeyourinnerguru.com/communityShop the merchandise – freeyourinnerguru.com/shop

This week I had the privilege of speaking to Sarah Edmondson, defector of the NXIVM cult and author of "Scarred: The True Story of How I Escaped the Cult that Bound My Life."  In 2005, when NXIVM, a personal and professional development company, promised to provide the tools and insight Sarah needed to reach her potential, she was intrigued. Over her twelve-year tenure, she went from student to coach and eventually operated her own NXIVM center in Vancouver. Questions kept coming up about the organization's rules and practices, which came to a head in 2017 when she accepted an invitation from her best friend to join DOS, a “secret sisterhood” within NXIVM. Sarah's full story as a whistleblower is featured in the CBC podcast “Uncover: Escaping NXIVM” (downloaded over 25 million times) and “The Vow”, the critically acclaimed HBO documentary series on NXIVM.  In 2019, Sarah published Scarred: The True Story of How I Escaped NXIVM, the Cult that Bound My Life, with Kristine Gasbarre. In this tell-all memoir, she shares her story from the moment she takes her first seminar to her harrowing fight to get out of NXIVM, collaborate with the FBI, help others, and heal. Sarah is keeping the conversation via her own podcast, "A Little Bit Culty,"  by exploring the fads, beliefs, and trends that blur the line between devotion and dysfunction. Co-hosted by her husband and fellow NXIVM whistleblower Nippy, the podcast is part conversational coffee date and part deep dive on everything from Waco to lululemon. And while there was nothing small about Sarah's cult experience, “A Little Bit Culty” is grounded in her mission to help people understand, heal from, and avoid abusive situations, one little red flag at a time. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/zoescurletis/support

In this episode:  Sarah Edmondson, the Vancouver-based actress and renowned whistleblower for the dangerous NXVIM cult, opens about her life inside the cult, and how her life has changed since leaving. She also shares her insight on high control groups like cults, and how seeking support is essential when you feel trapped. Background: Sarah Edmondson is an actor, author, and advocate for people in coercively controlled relationships.  For the past 15 or so years of her life, Sarah had a key role in enrolling people into the NXVIM organization until she uncovered and fell victim to the nefarious actions of the cult's leader Keith Raniere. Because of her bravery along with the actions of more of Raniere's victims, he is now serving a 120-year sentence for federal sex trafficking, forced labor, and other charges.  Sarah's full story as a whistleblower is featured in the CBC podcast Uncover: Escaping NXIVM (downloaded over 25 million times) and The Vow, the critically acclaimed HBO documentary series on NXIVM. Now that Edmondson is free from the NXVIM cult, she is producing her own podcast A Little Bit Cultly with her husband Nippy, another former NXVIM member.  Her bravery, well-spoken nature, and honesty make her a wonderful and fascinating podcast guest and we're so honored to have the opportunity to share her story.   In this episode, we also talk about:  Sarah's developing expertise on high control groups like cults. Sarah tell us about her motivation & purpose behind her memoir Scarred: The True Story of How I Escaped NXIVM, the Cult That Bound My Life Resources:  Connect with Sarah on IG: instagram.com/sarahedmondson Connect with Cielo on IG: instagram.com/seaandsky45/ Visit Sarah's Website: sarahedmondson.com Buy Sarah's Book Here: sarahedmondson.com/book Services: Are you an entrepreneur ready to take your brand to the next level? Want to increase your digital presence online so you can skyrocket your number of clients & sales? We can help YOU!   Visit BLENDtw Media to learn more about our digital marketing services and send us an email to outreach@blendtw.com to BOOK a F-R-E-E consultation TODAY.  For more resources to help you live your BEST life, join our community on: Facebook  Instagram Find more inspiring stories & higher wisdom at myvoiceourstory.com    

Sarah Edmondson is an actress who appeared on the popular CBC teen soap series, "Edgemont," SyFy's "Andromeda," "Continuum," and "Stargate SG-1", USA Network's "Dead Zone" and Lifetime Television's "Killer Hair" and "Hostile Makeover." As a voice-over artist, Sarah has created original voices for Cartoon Network's "Max Steel," and "Transformers Cybertron," Discovery Kids "Class of the Titans," Hasbro's "My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic," and Netflix's "Dinotrux." Sarah has also voiced characters for popular international children's series, including The Rose in France Télévisions "Le Petit Prince" and Thea Stilton for Italy's Rai 2's "Geronimo Stilton." Sarah was seen in various Hallmark movies, including AT HOME IN MITFORD, alongside award-winning actress Andie MacDowell. She played supporting roles in Hallmark's WEDDING OF DREAMS, starring Debbie Gibson, and Season Two of CBS's "Salvation." Just before the birth of her second child, she appeared in Hallmark's WELCOME TO CHRISTMAS. In 2005, Sarah joined NXIVM, a personal and professional development company. Over her 12-year tenure, she went from student to coach and eventually operated her own NXIVM center in Vancouver. In 2019, Sarah published Scarred: The True Story of How I Escaped NXIVM, the Cult that Bound My Life, with Kristine Gasbarre. In this tell-all memoir, she shares her story from the moment she takes her first seminar to her harrowing fight to get out of NXIVM, collaborate with the FBI, help others, and heal. Sarah's full story is featured in“The Vow,” the critically acclaimed HBO documentary series on NXIVM. Now with the launch of her own podcast, “A Little Bit Culty,” co-hosted by her husband and fellow NXIVM whistleblower Anthony “Nippy” Ames, she aims to help people understand, heal from, and avoid abusive situations, one little red flag at a time. Her podcast: https://www.alittlebitculty.com Her organization, #iGotOut, inspires survivors of cultic abuse to tell and share their stories, creating an online community dedicated to unflinching honesty: www.igotout.org. Her book: https://www.sarahedmondson.com/book The Vow: https://www.hbo.com/the-vow Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/sarahedmondson Twitter: https://twitter.com/sarahjedmondson Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/SarahJEdmondson Website: https://www.sarahedmondson.com Cameo: https://www.cameo.com/sarahandnippy ______________________________ Follow me on Instagram @LongDistanceLoveBombs: https://www.instagram.com/longdistancelovebombs Looking for a heartfelt gift? Visit my print shop here: https://www.longdistancelovebombs.com/theshop Sign up for my weekly newsletter! Each week, I share a personal story and my favorite books, tunes, articles, and ideas. Click here: http://eepurl.com/T0l91. It's easy and takes five seconds. Check out a list of 120 of my favorite books here, including many my guests have written and recommend reading: https://www.amazon.com/shop/longdistancelovebombs --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/longdistancelovebombs/message

Sarah Edmondson from HBO's The Vow, a nine-episode documentary series following a number of people who were deeply involved in the self-improvement group NXIVM over the course of several years. The Vow is a story of indoctrination and the step-by-step journey of NXIVM members defecting and outing the leader Keith Raniere. Sarah is the author of Scarred: The True Story of How I Escaped NXIVM, the Cult that Bound My Life. Reality Life with Kate CaseyPatreon: http://www.patreon.com/katecaseyCameo: https://cameo.com/katecaseyTwitter: https://twitter.com/katecaseyInstagram: http://www.instagram.com/katecaseycaTik Tok: http://www.tiktok.com/itskatecaseyClubhouse: @katecasey Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/113157919338245Amazon.com: www.amazon.com/shop/katecasey See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Sarah Edmondson is a Canadian actress who has starred in the CBS series Salvation and more than twelve films for the Hallmark Channel and Lifetime. Her upcoming Hallmark film, Roadhouse Romance airs this fall. She is also a well-established voice-over artist for popular series such as Transformers: Cybertron and My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic.In 2005, when NXIVM, a personal and professional development company, promised to provide the tools and insight Sarah needed to reach her potential, she was intrigued. Over her twelve-year tenure, she went from student to coach and eventually operated her own NXIVM center in Vancouver. Questions kept coming up about the organization's rules and practices, which came to a head in 2017 when she accepted an invitation from her best friend to join DOS, a “secret sisterhood” within NXIVM.In 2019, Sarah published Scarred: The True Story of How I Escaped NXIVM, the Cult that Bound My Life, with Kristine Gasbarre. In this tell-all memoir, she shares her story from the moment she takes her first seminar to her harrowing fight to get out of NXIVM, collaborate with the FBI, help others, and heal.Sarah's full story as a whistleblower is featured in the CBC podcast Uncover: Escaping NXIVM (downloaded over 25 million times) and The Vow, the critically acclaimed HBO documentary series on NXIVM.Now with the launch of her own podcast, “A Little Bit Culty,” Sarah is keeping the conversation going by exploring the fads, beliefs, and trends that blur the line between devotion and dysfunction. Co-hosted by her husband and fellow NXIVM whistleblower Anthony “Nippy” Ames, the podcast is part conversational coffee date and part deep dive on everything from Lululemon to Waco. And while there was nothing small about Sarah's cult experience, “A Little Bit Culty” is grounded in her mission to help people understand, heal from, and avoid abusive situations one little red flag at a time.Support the show (https://pod.fan/the-dude-therapist)

Support the Show:https://www.patreon.com/preacherboys Purchase a Preacher Boys shirt, mask, sticker, or other merch to rep the show! https://www.teepublic.com/user/preacher-boys-podcast_______________________________________________________On this episode, Eric Skwarczynski sits down with Sarah Edmondson and Anthony "Nippy" Ames to talk about their time inside NXIVM.Pick up a copy of Sarah's book here: https://amzn.to/3f9hF6w_______________________________________________________ABOUT SARAH:Sarah Edmondson is a Canadian actress who has starred in the CBS series Salvation and more than twelve films for the Hallmark Channel and Lifetime. She is also a well-established voice-over artist for popular series such as Transformers: Cybertron and My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic. In 2005, when NXIVM, a personal and professional development company, promised to provide the tools and insight Sarah needed to reach her potential, she was intrigued. Over her twelve-year tenure, she went from student to coach and eventually operated her own NXIVM center in Vancouver. Questions kept coming up about the organization's rules and practices, which came to a head in 2017 when she accepted an invitation from her best friend to join DOS, a “secret sisterhood” within NXIVM.In 2019, Sarah published Scarred: The True Story of How I Escaped NXIVM, the Cult that Bound My Life, with Kristine Gasbarre. In this tell-all memoir, she shares her story from the moment she takes her first seminar to her harrowing fight to get out. Her full story as a whistleblower is featured in the CBC podcast Uncover: Escaping NXIVM (downloaded over 25 million times) and The Vow, the critically acclaimed HBO documentary series on NXIVM. Now with the launch of “A Little Bit Culty,” Sarah and her co-host/husband Anthony “Nippy” Ames are keeping the conversation going by discussing the healing process with the help of experts and fellow survivors.ABOUT NIPPY:As an aspiring actor and former college athlete, Anthony “Nippy” Ames was drawn to NXIVM's goals program. In his 12 years with the organization, he rose steadily up the ranks as a teacher, built centers in New York and Vancouver, and even met his now-wife, “A Little Bit Culty” co-host, Sarah Edmondson, there. But when he learned that the company was, in fact, a dangerous cult, he wasted no time in doing exactly what needed to be done: helping burn its carefully constructed public image to the ground.With NXIVM's notorious founder now behind bars facing a brisk 120-year sentence, Nippy isn't planning on going quiet anytime soon. As Executive Producer of the “A Little Bit Culty” podcast, Nippy has come full circle back to what he was born to do: performing, creating, and truth-telling. He's proving to be an emerging voice in the conversation around what it means to be an upstanding man, husband, and father in 2021.________________________________________________________Find more stories regarding the IFB movement by visiting:preacherboysdoc.comhttps://www.facebook.com/preacherboysdochttps://twitter.com/preacherboysdochttps://www.instagram.com/preacherboysdoc/To connect with a community who share the Preacher Boys Podcast mission to expose abuse in the IFB, join the OFFICIAL Preacher Boys Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/1403898676438188/Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/preacher-boys-podcast/donationsAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

This episode contains material that may be sensitive for some listeners. Listener discretion is advised. Tonight, our incredible conversation with author, activist, and whistleblower Sarah Edmondson continues on The Spark. Sarah details her awakening from within the NXIVM cult that began with reconciling what she thought about the organization with the disturbing things she was witnessing, and how she bandied a group of friends together to take the organization down. We also hear from Sarah's husband Anthony "Nippy" Ames and gain some of his perspective about their powerful experience. Hear part one of our conversation: https://www.loudspeaker.fm/programs/the-spark-with-stephanie-james/episodes/unbound-with-sarah-edmondson-part-1 (https://www.loudspeaker.fm/programs/the-spark-with-stephanie-james/episodes/unbound-with-sarah-edmondson-part-1) Check out Sarah's book Scarred: The True Story of How I Escaped NXIVM, the Cult That Bound My Life, available now on Audible. Audible is offering a free audiobook and a free 30-day trial of their amazing service. Choose any book you want and cancel at anytime. The book is yours to keep no matter what. Learn more at http://audibletrial.com/thespark (http://audibletrial.com/thespark). Connect with Sarah: https://www.sarahedmondson.com/ (https://www.sarahedmondson.com/) Featured Music: https://filmmusic.io/song/7325-the-headquarters (The Headquarters by Euan Ford) License: https://filmmusic.io/standard-license https://filmmusic.io/song/6831-landing-on-the-moon-of-volcanoes (Landing On The Moon Of Volcanoes by MusicLFiles) License: https://filmmusic.io/standard-license https://filmmusic.io/song/6549-background-2-bounce (Background#2 Bounce by Lilo) License: https://filmmusic.io/standard-license https://filmmusic.io/song/5695-paper-flakes- (Paper Flakes by Rafael Krux) License: https://filmmusic.io/standard-license Like what we do? Support us on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/heyloudspeaker (https://www.patreon.com/heyloudspeaker) Hosted by Stephanie James. Produced by Chris Lanphear for Loudspeaker. Hear more great podcasts at https://www.loudspeaker.fm/ (https://www.loudspeaker.fm) Follow the show: https://www.thesparkpod.com/ (https://www.thesparkpod.com) https://www.facebook.com/thesparkpod (https://www.facebook.com/thesparkpod) https://www.instagram.com/stephaniethespark/ (https://www.instagram.com/stephaniethespark/) Follow Loudspeaker: https://twitter.com/heyloudspeaker (https://twitter.com/heyloudspeaker) https://www.facebook.com/heyloudspeaker (https://www.facebook.com/heyloudspeaker) https://www.instagram.com/heyloudspeaker (https://www.instagram.com/heyloudspeaker) Support this podcast

This episode contains material that may be sensitive for some listeners. Listener discretion is advised. What would you do if you found out that a cause you had devoted a decade of your life to wasn't what you thought it was? What if you found yourself embroiled in a sinister cult that bound itself to your life? I'm joined by Sarah Edmondson (subject of the new HBO series The Vow) and tonight, we travel through her experience with the NXIVM cult. It's a powerful episode that discusses how Sarah was manipulated and bound into a sex cult by sociopath Keith Raniere and his followers. We discuss the scars that were left in Sarah, literally from being branded and the emotional scars that she has begun to heal in her life. Strong and resilient, Sarah was the whistleblower who help put Keith Raniere under investigation, and ultimately, a prison cell currently serving 120 years. See how Sarah continues to find the sparks in herself and helps others to recognize and leave cult groups. All this and more, this week on The Spark with Stephanie James. Check out Sarah's book Scarred: The True Story of How I Escaped NXIVM, the Cult That Bound My Life, available now on Audible. Audible is offering a free audiobook and a free 30-day trial of their amazing service. Choose any book you want and cancel at anytime. The book is yours to keep no matter what. Learn more at http://audibletrial.com/thespark (http://audibletrial.com/thespark). Connect with Sarah: https://www.sarahedmondson.com/ (https://www.sarahedmondson.com/) Like what we do? Support us on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/heyloudspeaker (https://www.patreon.com/heyloudspeaker) Hosted by Stephanie James. Produced by Chris Lanphear for Loudspeaker. Hear more great podcasts at https://www.loudspeaker.fm/ (https://www.loudspeaker.fm) Follow the show: https://www.thesparkpod.com/ (https://www.thesparkpod.com) https://www.facebook.com/thesparkpod (https://www.facebook.com/thesparkpod) https://www.instagram.com/stephaniethespark/ (https://www.instagram.com/stephaniethespark/) Follow Loudspeaker: https://twitter.com/heyloudspeaker (https://twitter.com/heyloudspeaker) https://www.facebook.com/heyloudspeaker (https://www.facebook.com/heyloudspeaker) https://www.instagram.com/heyloudspeaker (https://www.instagram.com/heyloudspeaker) Support this podcast

[CW: sexual abuse; branding; cults] Actress Sarah Edmondson doesn't seem like the kind of person who would get swept up in a cult – and not just get swept up into a cult, but become one of its biggest recruiters and champions. And yet that is part of Sarah's story – as is how Sarah escaped the cult, and worked to bring it down.Sarah Edmondson recounted her story in the first season of CBC Podcasts' hit series, Uncover: Escaping NXIVM, and on the front page of the New York Times, where she was pictured folding down the front of her jeans to reveal the angry red scar that she received as part of a cult branding ritual. More recently, she wrote a deeply personal memoir: Scarred: The True Story of How I Escaped NXIVM, The Cult That Bound My Life.In this poignant and emotionally raw interview, Sarah Edmondson discusses the impact that the NXIVM cult had on her spirit and body as well as on the Vancouver film and television community, and what she wants next as she moves forward in her acting career with NXIVM in her rear-view mirror. Episode sponsor: UBCP/ACTRA

We spoke with Canadian actress Sarah Edmondson about her book "Scarred: The True Story of How I Escaped NXIVM, The Cult That Bound My Life"

Scarred follows actress Sarah Edmondson's account of her recruitment into the NXIVM cult, founded by Keith Raniere. It narrates in detail the 12 years she spent within the organization, during which she enrolled over 2,000 members, chronicling her breaking point and her harrowing fight to get out, help others, and heal.   Guest: Sarah Edmondon  Former member of NXIVM for 12 years Author of the new book, ‘SCARRED: The True Story of How I Escaped NXIVM, the Cult That Bound My Life'

NXIVM claimed to offer personal and professional development seminars through its "Executive Success Programs". But in reality it was a a cult and a pyramid scheme that brainwashed and blackmailed women into being sex slaves. GUESTS: Sarah Edmondson, author of Scarred: The True Story of How I Escaped NXIVM, the Cult that Bound My Life Rick Alan Ross, author of Cults Inside Out: How People Get in and Can Get Out To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Sarah Edmondson joins the show to share her experience of escaping the NXIVM cult, her childhood experiences that made her susceptible to joining the organization, and how to heal trauma caused by high-control organizations. Sarah was featured in HBO's NXIVM documentary, spent over a decade in the cult before eventually breaking free, is the host of the podcast A Little Bit Culty, and the author of Scarred: The True Story of How I Escaped NXIVM, the Cult That Bound My Life.⬇️DAMN THE JOIN SHITSHOW - ADULT CHILD HEALING COMMUNITY⬇️https://theshitshow.mn.co✅ 4 weekly zoom support groups✅ Support community at your fingertips with discussion boards and chat