Podcast appearances and mentions of violet beauregarde

Hey there, Fellow Watchers! This week on Born to Watch, we dive deep into one of the most whimsical, enchanting, and downright bizarre films of the 1970s, Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory. This technicolour dreamscape of a movie, adapted from Roald Dahl's beloved 1964 children's novel Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, is a kaleidoscopic journey that weaves together childlike wonder, satirical wit, and a dash of dark humour. But for those who've seen it, it's much more than just a kids' movie—it's a cinematic experience that has left a lasting impact on pop culture, filmmaking, and how we imagine the wildest corners of our childhood fantasies.Directed by Mel Stuart and released in 1971, Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory gave the world an enduring yet enigmatic character brought to life by the genius of Gene Wilder. Wilder's portrayal of Willy Wonka, with his trademark purple velvet coat, manic energy, and mysterious charm, is iconic. But the film isn't just about a quirky candy maker—it's about dreams, consequences, and the weird journey from innocence to maturity. Today, we're cracking open that golden ticket and exploring the layers of storytelling, visual splendour, and character depth that make this film a must-watch for every generation.The Dreamlike Cinematography: A Visual FeastFrom the first frame, Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory draws us into a world between the fantastical and the surreal. The film's cinematography, spearheaded by Arthur Ibbetson, feels deliberately disjointed from reality. The factory is where anything is possible—giant gummy bears, rivers of chocolate, and wallpaper you can lick. Using vibrant colours, practical effects, and innovative set design turns the film into a visual explosion still captivating more than 50 years later.One of the most stunning sequences comes early when the lucky ticket winners first step into Wonka's factory and are greeted by the Chocolate Room. The juxtaposition of the drab, muted tones of the outside world with the bursting, hyper-saturated colours inside the factory immediately transports us to a place where the ordinary laws of reality no longer apply. Every detail in this scene—from the candy trees to the chocolate river—feels like it was ripped straight from the wildest corners of a child's imagination. Yet, it's executed with a precision that keeps it from feeling cartoonish.And who could forget the unsettling tunnel scene? What starts as a gentle boat ride turns into a psychedelic nightmare. The flashing colours, dizzying camera angles, and unsettling imagery—coupled with Wilder's chilling recitation—make even the bravest viewers squirm. It's a perfect example of how the film balances whimsy with moments of genuine unease. This technique makes Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory much more layered than your children's film.Gene Wilder's Wonka: A Performance for the AgesWhen it comes to Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory, it's impossible to talk about the movie without spending time on Gene Wilder's portrayal of Willy Wonka. Wilder brings an incredible depth to the character, making him charming yet aloof, kind yet mischievous, and ultimately unpredictable. His entrance alone, stumbling through his factory gates with a cane only to somersault forward and rise with a grin, tells you everything you need to know: this man thrives on deception, mystery, and the thrill of keeping everyone guessing.Wilder's Wonka is not the traditionally heroic figure you might expect from a film aimed at children. There's something slightly off about him. He watches as the children fall victim to their vices—gluttony, greed, or pride—and while he expresses concern, there's always a twinkle in his eye. He's a trickster, just as likely to reward you as he is to teach you a hard lesson. And Wilder walks this tightrope perfectly, making Wonka endlessly watchable and infinitely complex.The film never shies away from showing us the darker side of Wonka's character. There's a controlled chaos to him, an edge that suggests he's more dangerous than he seems. Whether it's how he dismisses Augustus Gloop's drowning in the chocolate river or his cryptic “Good day, sir!” outburst toward Charlie, Wonka keeps the audience on edge. This unpredictability is what makes him such a memorable figure in cinema history.The Story: A Morality Play in Candy-Coated WrappingAt its core, Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory is a morality tale. Each of the children who wins a golden ticket represents a different vice—gluttony, greed, pride, and sloth. As they progress through the factory, they're confronted with temptations that ultimately lead to their downfall. Augustus Gloop's gluttony gets him sucked into the chocolate river, Veruca Salt's greed leads her down the garbage chute, and so on. Each "punishment" is delivered in a way that's both comical and, at times, chilling.What makes the film unique is how it balances this moralism with its fantastical elements. The consequences are clear, yet they're wrapped in a layer of surreal, candy-coated absurdity. The film isn't heavy-handed with its messaging, but it's impossible to miss the fact that each child's fate is a direct result of their own behaviour.Charlie Bucket, our humble hero, is the film's moral compass. Raised in poverty but rich in spirit, Charlie's simple goodness and humility starkly contrast to the other children's greed and entitlement. In the end, it's his genuine heart and good nature that earn him the ultimate prize—the entire factory. But even here, the film doesn't indulge in a sentimental ending. The lesson isn't that good behaviour always leads to material rewards but that integrity, humility, and kindness matter most, even in a world that can often seem unfair.Cultural Impact and LegacyThough Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory wasn't an immediate box-office hit, it found a second life through television reruns and home video, becoming a beloved classic for generations. Its impact on pop culture is undeniable—whether it's the Oompa Loompa songs, the countless memes, or Gene Wilder's iconic portrayal of Wonka. The film is often referenced in everything from cartoons to music videos, and its place in cinema history as one of the great fantasy films is well-earned.It's also fascinating to note how the film's themes of greed, entitlement, and the dangers of unchecked consumption still resonate today. The factory, with its promise of endless indulgence, reflects our own desires, reminding us that too much of a good thing can often lead to our downfall.In the end, Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory is a film that transcends its whimsical surface to explore deeper themes, all while offering a visual feast and a performance by Gene Wilder that remains timeless. Whether you're watching it for the first time or the hundredth, there's always something new to discover.Please follow the Podcast and join our community at https://linktr.ee/borntowatchpodcasthttps://www.borntowatch.com.au/

Aujourd’hui dans Mercredi!, on parle de pop culture en compagnie de Thomas, Clémence et Carla. Au programme, micro-trottoir, quiz Harry Potter et playlist sucrée au rythme des Oompa-Loompa ! Les musiques de l’émission : Louane – Jour 1 Soprano – En Feu The Ramones – Blitzkrieg Téléphone – Ça, (c’est vraiment toi) Danny Elfman – Main Titles (Charlie and the Chocolate Factory) Danny Elfman – Wonka’s Welcome Song Extrait du film « Harry Potter À L'École Des Sorciers (2001) » – scène « Le Choixpeau » Patrick Doyle – Eville's Waltz John Williams – Hedwig's Theme Danny Elfman – Violet Beauregarde Vincent Charbonnier – When Ginny Kissed Harry (Guitar Cover)  

Party Rock is on the pod tonight?! This week, we're joined by LMFAO expert Lauren Guerrera for a discussion of an unexpected high point for Catching Kelce - a trip to the Party Rock Mansion. As Travis himself gets slightly lost between the cracks, we find joy in an impassioned defence of Violet Beauregarde, a meticulously detailed research dossier, and a new game called Two Fooths and a Lie.

In a world ripe with sequels and remakes, 'Wonka' delivers a spectacle of pure imagination that reinvents the candy-coated world of our childhoods. Join us, movie lovers, as we unwrap the golden ticket to cinematic wonders! Today's episode is a scrumdiddlyumptious treat as we dive deep into the sugary world of "Wonka." Can you feel the excitement buzzing in the air? I'm practically doing cartwheels over here! Now, let's start by declaring our undying love for the source material. I mean, who hasn't dreamt of stepping into Willy Wonka's whimsical chocolate factory after devouring Roald Dahl's delightful book or savoring the charm of the classic films? We've got Violet Beauregarde-sized enthusiasm for this universe! From the moment this movie was announced, we've been on pins and needles, concocting our own theories and daydreaming about the visual feast awaiting us. And boy, oh boy, did it deliver! Director Paul King's vision, combined with the sheer genius of the source material, made this journey into Wonka's world an absolute joyride. The casting! Let's talk about that casting! Timothée Chalamet as the enigmatic Willy Wonka was a stroke of genius. He brought this mix of eccentricity and charm that's just oh-so-Wonka. And those supporting characters? We're talking a cast that's as diverse and vibrant as the flavors in a Wonka bar! But you know us, we don't just sugarcoat everything. We're here to chew on the meaty bits too. Did the film stay true to Dahl's magical essence? Did it carve its own path while paying homage to the beloved story? And those Oompa Loompas—did they break out into song and dance numbers that left us gleefully humming tunes for days? Buckle up, dear listeners, because we're about to unwrap this cinematic treat layer by layer, discussing every sprinkle, twist, and turn. Our excitement is off the charts, and we're just itching to share our thoughts, theories, and maybe even a few of our favorite Wonka-isms with you all! So grab your Everlasting Gobstoppers, check your golden tickets, and join us on this tantalizing journey through "Wonka." It's going to be a ride sweeter than a river of chocolate! --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/watchclosely/support

A wonderfully chocolatey world awaits you in this episode! - Yes, today we're going to look at the Wonderfull fantastic film Charlie and the chocolate factory, based on the original book written by Roald Dahl. - Inna from @inna_mill_esl talks to us about why she loves this film a lot. To start Inna tells us about the magic that Helen Bonham Carter, Mrs Bucket, breathes into this chocolatey film - Charlie Bucket is a very poor kid who lives with his parents and four grandparents and can only afford to eat cabbage soup. - The other main characters are Augustus Gloop, a very overweight boy who eats a lot, Veruca Salt, the spoilt kid who wants everything NOW, Violet Beauregarde, the serial winner and Mike Teevee, who loves watching TV. - As the story develops it becomes full of chocolate and lots of amazing things happen. - So, drop by and find out what happens in this chocolatey tale!

Aujourd’hui dans Mercredi!, on parle de pop culture en compagnie de Thomas, Clémence et Carla. Au programme, micro-trottoir, quizz Harry Potter et playlist sucrée au rythme des Oompa-Loompa ! Les musiques de l’émission : Louane – Jour 1 Soprano – En Feu The Ramones – Blitzkrieg Téléphone – Ça, (c’est vraiment toi) Danny Elfman – Main Titles (Charlie and the Chocolate Factory)  Danny Elfman – Wonka’s welcome song Extrait du film « Harry Potter À L'École Des Sorciers (2001) » – scène « Le Choixpeau » Patrick Doyle – eville's Waltz  John Williams – Hedwig's Theme Danny Elfman – Violet Beauregarde Vincent Charbonnier – When Ginny Kissed Harry (Guitar Cover)

You've sent us your theories, hot takes, secrets, and art. Now, it's time we share them with THE WORLD! Listenerpalooza is a listener-based episode compiled from your submissions, comments, and votes. Do you agree with your fellow Wonka Scholars? Let's find out! To keep up-to-date on all things Wonka, be sure to follow us on TikTok, Instagram, and Twitter @wonkawatch. We'd love to hear your concerns (it'd be unhealthy if you didn't have any). Email us at wonkarapture@gmail.com Links Referenced (because even Wonka Scholars cite their sources): Amy's Art: https://www.instagram.com/amy.stankova.art/ Danny Elfman Interview: https://variety.com/2021/music/news/danny-elfman-new-album-big-mess-interview-1234994122/https://www.reddit.com/r/raimimemes/comments/s2onxg/danny_elfman_performing_at_coachella_2022/ Hanz Zimmer Coachella: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aaRze4pPRDY Candy - Caravan of Theives: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eloWY6o7LOI Violet Should Have Won Post: https://mediachomp.com/violet-should-have-won-wonkas-chocolate-factory/ Timestamps 00:00 Listenerpalooza starts off with a wild intro song and an extreme love of Mini M&M's. 5:00 Mark Wonka's suprise! 6:38 Wonka Watch: Danny Elfman is playing at Coachella 2022. 14:33 Let's enter Listenerpalooza! What is Wonka's bedroom like? 18:45 Listener song recommendations that remind us of Wonka. 22:42 Justice for Violet Beauregarde. 28:00 Our food dreams? 29:27 Wonka Hunger Games Poster. 31:22 Instagram Poll results 31:53 Who is your fav Wonka? Have you read the book before? 34:00 What Wonka candy do you want the most? 36:58 Favorite Wonka kid? 42:35 Most hated Wonka kid? 45:58 Do you think the kids died in the factory? 47:26 Who is suffering the most from the Wonka knowledge? 49:14 Is Timmy Wonka a good casting? 51:34 Fav room in the chocolate factory? 52:48 Listeners' hottest Wonka takes. 56:23 Questions for us! 1:02:21 Prequel predictions (including listeners!). Christine - pic of Gene or Johnny Wonka in background Rae - Timmy Wonka life-crisis Felicia - Someone makes a reference to their teeth aching. Elaine - Timmy Wonka will cry out of pain and loneliness. 1:06:35 A snazzy outro with some SAPPY LOVIES.

Today's fan theories: Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory is a horror film?! Wonka murdered five kids and turned them into candy? Violet Beauregarde deserved to win more than Charlie did? Even if you can't believe that, at least we can all agree, Grandpa Joe was a terrible, horrible person who deserves our hate. Watch Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory at https://www.amazon.com/Willy-Wonka-Chocolate-Factory-Wilder/dp/B002YNGNG6 and follow along with us!

Chapters 21-24 of Charlie and The Chocolate Factory. Violet Beauregarde is horribly transformed into a New American Gastro-Pub. Everyone taste-tests a blood wall. Charlie and Grandpa Joe roid-out on Fizzy-Lifting-Drinks. The Gary’s discuss representation of the Oompa Loopma community in the safe “Square-Candies-That-Look-Round” room. The Salt's are violently assaulted by room full of squirrels; the fate of their survival resting purely in the hands of an emerging She-Wolf... just like you remember from the book!!   Follow us on social media for more @ImprovOnTape and @ImprovOnTapeShow.

Violet undergoes the consecequences of chewing gum 24/7 365 --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/storyzestbyladydawn/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/storyzestbyladydawn/support

Show Notes3:59 — March shares the results from his experiment with reducing his alcohol to improve the quality of his sleep.6:57 — How his heart rate variability has changed based on measurements from his Oura ring.7:50 — Matthew Walker's interview with Kevin Rose on the effects of alcohol on sleep quality.9:52 — Darren's results on increasing his exercise to help combat the winter blues.10:45 — The record-breaking winter weather that Seattle has experienced this year.11:23 — How combining his goal of working from home has helped Darren carve out time for exercise and made it easier to cook at home more.12:30 — Ian shares what he's done to improve the effectiveness of meetings that he organizes at work using tips from episode 102: Better Meetings.13:50 — What happens when none of the meeting participants read the meeting agenda ahead of time.15:37 — The results of March's experiment with recording all his meetings and sharing the recording with others.16:35 —March shares a pro tip of playing meeting recordings back at 2X speed.17:30 — The etiquette of giving attendees a heads up that the meeting is being recorded.18:40 — Meetings that March specifically does not record.19:55 — Darren's experiment with hot-cold therapy using the sauna at the gym followed by a cold shower.22:28 — March introduces Ian and Darren to the sauna sleeping bag and the sweat box.23:40 — We discuss the ridiculousness of the home sweat box available from Alibaba and Darren remarks at the similarity between the sweat box image and Violet Beauregarde blowing up into a blueberry from the Willy Wonka movie.

Tune in as we open livery deliveries from Ferrari, Red Bull, Renault, and McLaren who all went matte! There is also a Coronavirus Chinese GP update, and F1 helmet news that turns us purple with pride like Violet Beauregarde. SUBSCRIBE to Purple Sector wherever you get your podcasts FOLLOW @PurpleSectorPod on Instagram and Twitter CALL/TEXT Purple Sector at +1 904-8-PURPLE

Nintendo had a lot to say last week, and the team dives into that on the GamesBeat Decide podcast. On this week's episode, reviews editor Mike Minotti gives World of Warcraft Classic the full seal of approval and PC gaming editor Jeff Grubb is digging Control as well as Super Nintendo games on Switch. In the news, Nintendo steals the spotlight with a jam-packed Nintendo Direct. Overwatch, Tokyo Mirage Sessions, Return of the Obra Din, and Xenoblade Chronicles Definitive Edition are all coming to the Switch. So are some classic Star Wars games and Divinity Original Sin 2 with cross-save support with the Steam version. And Deadly Premonition 2 is happening and so is a free-to-play Kirby game. Oh, and then Terry from Fatal Fury is coming to Super Smash Bros. Ultimate, and then that game got a separate mini Direct right after the main show. It's a lot. In other news, we have a better idea of what the next Resident Evil game is. The new Plants vs. Zombies game is out ... or is it? And then more Nintendo with its weird yoga thing. Here are the games that we talk about: Jeff: Super Nintendo Control Mike: World of Warcraft Classic NEWS Nintendo Direct Project Resistance Teaseryoutube.com/watch?... KINGDOM HEARTS III Re Mind [DLC] TGS 2019 Trailer (Closed Captions) youtube.com/watch?... Multiplayer confirmed for Cyberpunk 2077 twitter.com/CDPROJ First look at a new experience for Nintendo Switch youtube.com/watch?.. PVZ: Battle for Neighborville confirmed Steam has over 40,000 ‘indie’ games, and this is fine --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/gamesbeat-decides/support

Free Slurpee Day at 7-11. On this Day on KFIN- 2005 - Rascal Flarrs - Fast Cars & Freedom. Brandon get's called out for his "likes" on social media. Gotcha Gossip: Taylor Swift tops Forbes list. Free Slurpee Day at 7-11. On this Day on KFIN- 2005 - Rascal Flarrs - Fast Cars & Freedom. Brandon get's called out for his "likes" on social media. Gotcha Gossip: Taylor Swift tops Forbes list. Willy Wonka child passes away - Violet Beauregarde. What movie have you or your child watched over and over? Mother's Intuition. Gotcha Gossip: Miley Cyrus ready to rebuild. Uber launching "NO TALKING" rides. Brandon upset about a chocolate chip cookie. Country Music News: Luke Combs was told he would never make it. What's on TV tonight?

In the Willy Wonka episode Albert put Veruca "salt" in the wounds of Charlie and the Chocolate Factory fans around the world!

Season 3, Episode 9 – This week, a last minute stop into Anaheim’s Bottle Logic Brewing ends with juicy beers, something tart, and gigaflops of hops.   Get your Four Brewers “Metal Logo” shirt!Available for a limited time: fourbrewers.com/metal Before we get into the beers, it should be known that Greg’s cask ale festival called “Firkfest” is going down on March 19, 2016 in Anaheim, California. We’ve been promoting this event for good reason—it’s a unique festival to Southern California, featuring 30 breweries and 50 cask beers, ranging from the more traditional cask conditioned beers to firkins with chocolate, peppers, or whatever else brewers want to add to their standard release and one-off beers. Get your tickets at firkfest.com. Beers From Bottle Logic Brewing Shooting each other in the junk with laser beams sounded like fun at the time, but drinking Bottle Logic Brewing beers in their barrel room seemed like a better idea. Speaking of shooting each other in the junk with lasers, it turns out that She Shot First with galaxy, citra and centennial in our gaping, carbonite mouths. Although hoppy wheats may be known for their modern unfortunate landmass times, this beer was birthed on the homestove of Bottle Logic Master Brewer Wes Parker. “Juicy,” says Four Brewers’ Jason Harris, otherwise known as Internet’s Golden Brett, in a nasally, high-pitched voice. Zerø Day juices our mouths with Vermont-style IPA cloud beer. Juice profiles are dialed in, maximum hoppage is achieved, targets are hit, and montages are played with sweaty Bottle Logic brewers listening to “I Need a Hero.” The beer looks like a yellow pair of Juicy Couture sweat pants got dipped in freshly dry hopped beer and wrung out into pint glasses. But, oh if it ain’t juicy and supremely delicious. Wes Parker, Brewmaster at Bottle Logic Berliner Equation w/ Blueberries is next. It’s kettle soured and bursting with fruit. 350 pounds of berries tie our tongues into a quadratic equation, nearly turning us into Violet Beauregarde. Thankfully, we got rolled to the juicing room for squeezing, doopity doo. Expansion for sour beer?  Yes! Bottle Logic is creating a sour/brett beer facility. Oh, and spoiler alert. Recursion 8.0 is next. This IPA is surprising software, with 2.5 hexadecimal pounds of dry hop per gigabarrel. Dank.exe is compiled with no bugs. Pee.bat is called.  We wrap up part 1 of the Bottle Logic visit with medal-winning Cobaltic Porter. Details are then leaked about their anniversary Week of Logic: Hint: it’s space themed. Stay tuned for part 2 of our visit to Bottle Logic next week, S2/E10. Photos from our session at Bottle Logic: https://flic.kr/s/aHskvfBkxw BREW THE SHIT OUT OF IT. Beers from this week’s episode:Bottle Logic Brewing – She Shot FirstBottle Logic Brewing – Zerø DayBottle Logic Brewing – Berlinear Equation w/ BlueberriesBottle Logic Brewing – Recursion 8.0Bottle Logic Brewing – Cobaltic Porter Direct audio: MP3 Subscribe:iTunes: Audio / VideoRSS: Audio / VideoStitcherYouTube (Videos) Support the show:PatreonPayPal 4B Social Media:FacebookTwitterInstagramtumblrFlickrSnapchat Email 4B: feedback@fourbrewers.com Leave us a voicemail: (213) 316-8699

Willy Wonka & The Chocolate Factory fans will recognize the name of this cocktail. In the film, an overzealous Violet Beauregarde chews some special gum resulting in her plumping up like a giant blueberry. Thus, the Beauregarde’s Breakfast Cocktail. Using Canon house-made blueberry preserves, Jamie creates a delightful brunch cocktail that celebrates that most American of spirits, Bourbon.

SNAKE writes... AFTER BITING REAL WORLD BROOKLYN, I WAITED FOR THE VENOM TO SPREAD THROUGH THE CAST. WHILE I STARED AND TAUNTED MY PREY I SAW THAT PEOPLE WERE WATCHING THIS ATTACK. CLIVE DRISCOLL WAS ESPECIALLY ENTHUSED. IN FACT HE BEGAN CLUBBING THE WEAKENED VICTIM WITH HIS FAKE ARM...CLIVE writes...First of all, I just want to say that it is about time someone came out and bashed this season’s Real World. Well done, Snake. Another successful bite. Having said that, this season should not just be snake bit but castrated (wait, Katelyn already was).Being selected to be on the Real World is like getting the Golden Ticket of reality t.v. The producers, Bunim and Murray, one of whom is dead, so let me change that to Bunim or Murray, the one producer that is alive, is your Willy Wonka. Every year thousands upon thousands of fame-seeking nutcases send in their audition tapes, or to keep the analogy going, buy bars of chocolate. The tapes then get filtered down by the casting directors (who should be fired for this season a la Donald Trump to Andrew Dice Clay) who can alter any normal person’s life into a life of Gauntlet/Duel appearances, bar tours, and constant mockery on E!'s The Soup.As Snake mentioned, these fucking moron casting directors selected not one but two people from Salt Lake City, Utah. As far as I know there are two things good about Salt Lake City, Utah, one is Karl "The Mailman" Malone,() and.... nothing else. Also, correct me if I am wrong, doesn't the Real World consist of 7 cast members. 21 seasons of 7 cast members and this group of shmohawks (courtesy of Larry David) decide to cast 8. The final decision in putting the worst cast together in RW history must have been so hard that they decided they had to include the transgender AND the boring guy with great abs. Yet, here we are today, approaching the final episode of the worst season ever, or as I call it, my own personal glass elevator that will set me free of this nonsense world.I'VE GOT A GOLDEN TICKET, I'VE GOT A GOLDEN TWINKLE IN MY EYE:Picture each cast member’s initial reaction to getting the call (finding their ticket) to be chosen for the Real World…Chet: So excited that he almost touched a boobie for the first time. Instead he wrapped his purple scarf around his neck and started masturbating furiously to pre-taped episodes of Carson Daily hosting TRL.Ryan: Tried to return the engagement ring he bought his girlfriend, but found out it was non-refundable. Afterwards, he googled Pranks and started shining his shoes.Carl: (Wait, who is Carl? Carl is Katelynn’s birth name.) Carl found out and wanted to really flip the script on the nation. Carl booked a plane to Thailand, bought a pair of booty shorts and went to a back-alley abortion clinic and said, "Make this work."Scott: After finding out, Scott not pleased enough with his abs, spent 248 hours in the gym working out. Only stopping to check himself out in the mirror and to spot his workout buddy who happens to be into guys.Sarah: Bitches and complains she got chosen because that is all she knows how to do. Feeling her sleeve of tattoos was not enough to make her stand out, she decides that back when she was 10 she shouldn’t have shared a sleeping bag with her father. He is now an estranged sexual molester and she the whiny-cunt of a victim.Devyn: Wipes the cum of three casting directors off her face. She is so thrilled that she is chosen, she offers them the opportunity to tittyfuck her as well. Disgusted by her nipple-to-boobie ratio, they decline and ask her to leave.J.D.: Has no family and no friends, he has no boyfriend because he is not gay, he is fucking faggot. JD celebrated by fucking the blowhole of his favorite dolphin, Fudgie. Not satisfied by Fudgie, JD then paid a homeless man 20 bucks to provide that particular golden twinkle in his eye.Baya: Is so excited she has bee chosen and given a chance to escape her hometown of Salt Lake City. That night celebrating with her hippie parents she goes into a dance frenzy, falls and fucks up her two front teeth, leaving her with a noticeable gap. (I would still fuck her btw, she is hot.)The Cast:They arrive at the factory and the camera starts rolling. The nation finds out this year has a twist: 8 cast members. 4 guys and 4 girls? Or is it 5 guys and 3 girls? Or is it 2 guys and 6 girls?What happened to the good old Real World Casting Stereotypes? The gay guy, the bumpkin, the bitch, the hot girl, the black guy, the weird guy, and the x-factor. Over the first 20 years, these tried-and-true stereotypes have provided us with great characters like the Miz, that Oakland Raiders cheerleader, Choral, multiple overly gay men, Tyree "you stabbed my father,” etc. This year we have no black guy. (To hold shit down.)Instead we have Scott or Wonka's Mike Teavee. Teavee was, as his last name implied, a television fanatic, seldom away from his television set. Instead of TV, Scott is seldom away from the gym. The fucking moron has the opportunity to get any girl he wants on any night of the week and opts to play pool, check emails, workout, and build a love/hate relationship with a transgender. Remember the episode where, Katelynn has no money (because she spent god knows how much to clip her penis and turn it into a walking black hole looking to suck in anything within range) and Scott comes in and, despite their constant arguing, provides her with some money. I remember screaming out, “fuck” really loud. Typical douche. Scott deserves the same fate as Teavee, to be shrunk. Scott should stripped of all his steriods and given the same procedure as Katelynn since his nuts have already shrunk from the lack of pussy during this season. Fuck you, Scott, you fucking ungrateful piece of shit.Speaking of Katelynn, the similarities between her and Arthur Slugworth are remarkable. They are both ugly as sin and evil. Slugworth is looking for the formula for the "everlasting gobstopper" and Katelynn is looking for the formula for the "everlasting nightmare." SHE HAS FOUND IT. Watching her flock around the house in booty shorts, make out with guys and girls, pole dance, and even just speak words has kept me up many a night, crying and asking why. Why hasn't Murray or Bunim said, "This is too much... We like nudity, it gets us ratings but this is just fucking wrong." She could wear the crown for ‘Someone-Who-Grosses-Me-The-Fuck-Out-On-Sight.’ Of course, in the movie it turns out that Slugworth is really Mr. Wilkerson, just like Katelynn pretending to something she is clearly not, a woman. Fuck you, you fucking disgusting piece of shit.Speaking of pieces of shit, JD will take that crown. This midget dolphin trainer, like all gay men, thinks he is better than everyone else. I hate his posture, I hate the way he talks and looks. He can only be likened to the Oompa Loompas. First, he would fit in as an Oompa Loompa for his height. Second, he would fit in because he likes banging guys. I am sorry to drop the bomb, but hundreds of little orange men working in a chocolate factory with no women in sight? Excuse the obvious pun, but there is definitely some fudge packing. JD had the moment this season where he broke a glass table. I don't remember why and I don't care. Oh now I do, he is a drama queen who instead of singing catchy tunes that teach lessons, he sucks pole. Fuck you, you fucking cock-sucking piece of shit.You can't say “cock-sucking” and not think of Chet. If he is straight and has never had a cock in or around his mouth, than I will jump out the window of my apartment. Chet is Augustus Gloop, the gluttonous overeater. Chet is not overeating, though, he is being overviewed. Every episode Chet dominates with his ambiguous behavior. Am I the only one who thinks he is on Ryan's balls a bit too much? He got his bowtie in a frenzy that one episode where Ryan didn't come home on time. We have to watch week after week as Chet hosts this show, or applies for his MTV job, or almost comes out, or pretends to like Scott’s friend to mask his cock loving. Additionally, he has worn the same outfits the whole season. You unoriginal fuck. You need to finally fall into that chocolate river and come out of the closet. I am sorry, mormon or not, if you are 21 years or older and have not touched a boob, you are gay. If you are not gay, you should think about becoming gay. Fuck you, you fucking virgin piece of shit.One person who is clearly not a virgin is Devyn. As Beyonce says, “A Diva is the female version of a Hustler.” And as I say, “An annoying slutty cunt is the my version of a Diva.” If I hear Devyn liken herself to a Diva one more time, I am going to cut the fake titty out of her and suffocate her with it. Devyn, like Wonka's Veruca Salt, regularly exerts petulant behavior in order to get what she desires. Devyn spends her time on the phone talking to the 6-8 guys she teases in order to get what she wants, money. When I look at Devyn, I can't help but think she takes monster dumps. I hate how she wears that sleep mask also (just a sidenote). Devyn deserves the same fate as Veruca, whose endgame comes in Wonka's Nut Sorting Room. No explanation needed. Fuck you, you fucking Diva-wanna-be piece of shit.Baya, oh Baya. Do people in Salt Lake City not fuck? She is really hot, she moves well, she has a bit of a gapper but that just gives u a target, like trying to score a goal. Baya is Violet Beauregarde, a tomboy who exhibits a more competitive spirit than the four other ticket winners. Baya does herself no justice by dressing in sweatpants and hoodies every episode. Show some skin, you should be pole dancing, not that mutant. Just as Violet chews her gum constantly, Baya constantly is not speaking as if she is chewing so much gum she can't speak. There are some episodes where I didn’t even see her once. Damn shame because I actually like her. She will suffer the same fate as Violet and turn into a giant blueberry. Baya will keep putting of her dancing dreams and after realizing that she missed the opportunity of a lifetime and took a back seat this season will comfort herself with food. After gaining 70 pounds, her DJ'ing dreams will end, and back to Salt Lake City. Fuck you, you fucking hot piece of shit.Someone else on this season, I remotely like is Ryan or in Wonka's case, Charlie. Ryan is likable and good hearted like Charlie. But for fucks’ sake man, you are on the Real World. Have you not watched in the past? Guys like you are cleaning up on a nightly basis. By episode 4 you are supposed to break up with the home girlfriend and bang the hot room mate, Baya. It is a science. Did the PTSD take away your libido? Like Charlie, Ryan would rather hang out with his family than go out there and bang some hot ass. Charlie could have walked down the street with that golden ticket and banged some serious whores or in his case got jerked off (he was 11ish). Ryan could have banged Baya if he wanted to, and then moved onto the millions of NYC girls who would suck a dick for ten minutes of fame on MTV. But no, this fuck had to do the right thing like Charlie. Where did that get you though? Back in Iraq, with no pussy, you fucked up. Fuck you, you fucking honest piece of shit.Last but not least, Sarah, the tattooed bitch who, as Snake pointed out, looks like the dude from Blink 182. I never thought she was remotely good looking but has she gained 20-30 pounds since the show started? What is with this season and choosing people with some serious issues? Transgender, JD's abusive father, Sarah's sexually abusive father, Ryan's army experience, Baya's SLC background, Chet's lackof pussy, Scott's steroid issue, Devyn's porn past. Sarah is Wonka's...actually fuck that, Sarah just sucks. Nothing good about her at all. What did the casting directors see in her? "Oh, she has a sleeve of tattoos, she is edgy." Yeah doing finger paintings with 5 year olds is real edgy. Sarah is the kind of girl who has a FUPA and hides it well and has a pussy that smells worse than curry mixed with an overweight kids sweat after a rigorous game of dodgeball. Fuck you, you fucking worst casted Real World member piece of shit.YOU LOSE. GOOD DAY, SIR!!!In summary, Bunim or Murray (the living one), should fire every casting director involved with this season’s meltdown. I blame myself for tuning in week after week hoping for Ryan to bang a chick, or Baya to show some skin, or Chet to cum instantly after touching his first vagina, or Devyn to not be on the phone, or Katelynn to get drunk reach inside herself and pull out Carl's penis, or Scott to jam that pool stick up his ass so far it comes out of his nose, or JD to go down on his roomates while they are asleep, or Sarah to not piss me off. Fuck this season, fuck Bunim or Murray, whichever one is alive. You all lose, you all wasted the golden ticket. There is no glass elevator for any of you, just a swift kick in the nuts, vag, or vagnuts from me if I ever see any of you walking the streets of NYC.Congratulations, Real World. You've just been Driscolled.-Clyde