"She Seems So Normal" by Leigh Mackenzie

We wrap up the season with a bonus episode: The end narrative, final notes, and the rest of the 23rd psalm. How appropriate this final episode publishes three days after my 52nd birthday, on the 23rd of 2023? God has a crazy sense of humor. What's next for me? Stay tuned. Look for anxiety toolkit workshops, an anxiety strategy workbook and new discussion guide for SSSN on Amazon, and a BRAND NEW BOOK I'm writing with co-author Randy Petersen called "Stories Not Shared On Sundays" that we cannot wait to share with you soon. Get all the updates when you sign up at www.leighmackenzie.com or follow on IG: @xoxo_leighmackenzie FB: XOXOLeigh Mackenzie --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/leigh-mackenzie/message

The final gripping chapter in "She Seems So Normal" as the Holy Spirit helps me finally - truly - forgive, confront, and heal. You can't make this stuff up, Friends. Get the full story and all the resources: Buy The Book On Amazon-- Buy two and donate copies to your local ministry leader, veteran, trauma warrior, shelter, jail ministry, or school! Click HERE for a vast array of other incredible support resources on the website. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/leigh-mackenzie/message

Can we release others from their part in our suffering and pain? Is it possible to forgive the unforgivable? Is there absolution for abusers in heaven above - are s3xual predators saved from hell? With Jesus, the answer is yes. +++ “I do not think that all who choose wrong roads perish; but their rescue consists in being put back on the right road. A sum can be put right: but only by going back til you find the error and working it afresh from that point, never by simply going on. Evil can be undone, but it cannot 'develop' into good. Time does not heal it. The spell must be unwound, bit by bit, 'with backward mutters of dissevering power' --or else not.”― C.S. Lewis, The Great Divorce #TRAUMASURVIVOR #CSLEWISQUOTES #SHESEEMSSONORMAL #FORGIVENESS #CHRISTIANFORGIVENESS #CHRISTFORGIVES #CHRISTIANSFORGIVE --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/leigh-mackenzie/message

What does biblical healing look like between a husband and wife when one has trauma? How can God move a Christian marriage forward, heal deep rifts, and destroy lies from past distorted beliefs and storylines? There's hope for anyone questioning if their marriage can bounce back post-s3xual trauma therapy. Only a few more episodes until the end of Season 1 of "She Seems So Normal" and I'm thrilled to present these last few in the book to you. Have you gotten your copy of She Seems So Normal: Shatter The Plastic Princess, Embrace Authentic Faith yet? #traumatherapy #christianmarriages #hopeformarriages #christianmarriagestories #hopefilledstories #traumasurvivors #healingandhope #sheseemssonormal --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/leigh-mackenzie/message

Yeesh. Feet. Who knew they were such a massive trigger for me? It all goes back to childhood memories and flashbacks I could never resolve until now. Friends, I am so thankful to know the truth, to find understanding, and to gain power over my past through the wisdom, knowledge, and love of the Holy Spirit and others. LOTS OF COPING STRATEGIES IN THIS EPISODE! It's like "Where's Waldo?" Can you identify and list them all? Be on the lookout for a BONUS episode... and grab your own copy of She Seems So Normal. #traumatriggers #traumacopingmechanisms #sheseemssonormal #traumasurvivor #traumawarrior --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/message

Gross--more toes, but I laugh through the entire episode at the back-and-forth between Christopher and me on this one. #traumahealing #ChristianMarriage #lovingyourhusband #loveoneanother #healingpodcast --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/message

How many times do we write narratives about ourselves or others completely SABOTAGING our relationships? We make assumptions not based in reality or fact, we think we "know" someone when we haven't even given them the benefit of the doubt or a chance to prove us wrong... My session started with being married to Christopher for almost three decades... and ended up someplace WILDLY DIFFERENT, WAY BIGGER, and RIDICULOUSLY REVOLUTIONARY. Go Get The Book: on AMAZON. #traumatriggers #learnedhelplessness #traumahealing #healingpodcast #sheseemssonormal #christianmarriage #christianrelationships --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/message

This one is a long one. Split it into two if you must. However, stand amazed at the love of a husband for his wife and how one little family practically supported a survivor through her healing process. I'm thinking I need to get Christopher a "PICKLE JAR POWER!" t-shirt now. Anyone have a good logo or design suggestion? :) #traumasupporter #biblicaltraumahealing #traumahealing #traumasurvivor #traumahealingpodcast #traumahealingtechniques #picklessavelives #vlasicpickles --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/message

K, I'm so excited about this one! It's the last of the Three B's, BLESSING, and then we're gonna look upward toward heaven to examine God's Unlimited Toolbox! **** Did you know the book, She Seems So Normal: Shatter the Plastic Princess, Embrace Authentic Faith is available on Kindle and in print at Amazon, Barnes&Noble, and Christianbooks? #traumahealing #traumawarriors #traumatoolbox #sheseemssonormal --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/message

Three B's for your Anxiety Toolbox: BREATH + BRAIN + BLESSING = DE-ESCALATION. Chatting about the first two of three B's today. You won't wanna miss this... ***** Did you know She Seems So Normal: Shatter the Plastic Princess, Embrace Authentic Faith is now in the top fifty of Amazon Bestsellers for Abuse Self Help Books? Go order yours today. --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/message

This is a 3-part series on trauma. Today, we talk about negative coping tools. ****** Did you KNOW? You can now buy the book, She Seems So Normal: Shatter the Plastic Princess, Embrace Authentic Faith!! In it you'll get the FULL MEGILLAH, the whole story. I'm excited for you to read it. #sheseemssonormal #traumatools #traumacopingmechanisms #abuseselfhelp #biblicaltraumahealing --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/message

There's a HUGE difference between the spiritual practice of solitude and the enemy's methods of isolation. In this episode, I'm gonna share a few secrets of how d'Evil plays his wicked game and how you can defeat him. ******* Did you KNOW??? You can now BUY THE BOOK! ;) Read and then donate to a woman's shelter, your pastor or church library, or your therapist's office, or leave it at your local laundromat or on the bus for someone else. xoxo You're blessed to become a blessing for someone else. While you're at it, come follow me on IG @xoxo_leighmackenzie or visit my website at www.leighmackenzie.com. #spiritualwarfare #thedevilsucks #sheseemssonormal #howtonotisolate #isolationisdangerous #spiritualbattles #spiritualwarfareteaching #traumawarriors #biblicaltraumahealing --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/message

Can you do a new thing, pivot, and go in a new direction? OF COURSE YOU CAN! I did. Just ask NICODEMUS... Speaking of NICODEMUS, this religion-led dude figures it all out after a fifteen-minute convo with the Savior, but takes a "piano, piano" approach over time--little by little growing his courage of conviction. It's a rockin story. I think you'll dig it. We can stop cycles if we choose to CHANGE instead of leaving things to CHANCE... ******** To know more about Jesus as Lord and Savior: View the Story: Click HERE Amazing film shorts and testimonies with Peter Craig at MovingWorks.org: Click HERE #healingpodcast #traumawarrior #biblicaltraumhealing #sheseemssonormal #doanewthing #CSAsurvivor --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/support

One of my favorite teaching moments is in this episode. Honestly. I've wanted to write an entire book about the ladies of the Gospels for YEARS and I finally found a way to slip them in here. Maybe this needs to be another signature talk cuz I LOVE THEM! #traumahealing #healingpodcast #biblicaltraumahealing #storiesfromIndia #ministryinIndia #CAREINDIA #POVERTY #worship #suffering --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/support

SHARE THIS ONE. RATE THIS PODCAST. LEAVE A COMMENT how much you're enjoying it, okay? Ohhhhh, does God love the UNDERDOG? Yaaaasssss, Baby! You gotta hear this one. I loved how this turned out, Friends. Won't you LMK your thoughts here? #underdogs #traumahealing #traumawarriors #gideonteaching #growingfaith --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/support

TW: Dysfunctional food and eating issues are covered in this episode along with body dysmorphia and how it tied to my childhood grooming. *** Gah. Still struggle with this. That's why it's so HARD to release this one. There are some things that might always be broken in my brain. Can we ever heal from trauma? Anything's possible with Jesus, but I believe we just get better as we follow Him. If you struggle with eating disorders or body dysmorphia, get support and help: National Eating Disorders Hotline (None of the recommendations or suggestions I give are meant to substitute for professional therapy or medical help, they are simply options for people to consider.) #healingpodcast #eatingdisorders #CSAsurvivor #biblicaltraumahealing #sheseemssonormal --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/support

If this sounds familiar to anyone, it's part of a talk on Suffering I gave years ago to more than 500 people at a women's conference. Though it's been modified for the book and my present circumstances, I remember praying and fasting in the 40 days before I gave this presentation. (check out the link HERE--no judgment, please for the hair and all from 2015!) *** Friends PAIN and TRAUMA are PAIN and TRAUMA... it all hurts. There is no COMPARATIVE SUFFERING. #biblicaltraumahealing #thebeautifulfight #comparativesuffering #traumawarrior #sheseemssonormal --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/support

beau·ti·ful /ˈbyo͞odəfəl/ adj. 1. pleasing the senses or mind aesthetically; 2. of a very high standard; excellent. *** A lotta people think they know what's beautiful. I thought I did. Boy, was I wrong. #traumahealing #godlovesyou #youarebeautiful #itsnotwhatyoudid #sheseemssonormal #healingpodcast --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/support

Where does God reside in our BROKENNESS? How does JESUS feel about our suffering? What does the Holy Spirit say about YOUR Broken Self? You might be surprised. Permit me to speak words of LOVE and HEALING over you in this short lil episode. (Then go read Psalm 103 in The Passion Translation!) Muah~leighxoxo ******** You want resources and more sunshine and happiness? Of COURSE you do. Guess what? The brand new Leigh Mackenzie website is live, rife with great stories, Bible teaching, and empowering encouragement. Sign up for the VIP list for the latest from Leigh. #traumahealing #PTSD #traumawarrior #CSASurvivor #sheseemssonormal #healingpodcast #JesusLovesYou # --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/support

I am honored to share an interview with my son, Julian Mackenzie. (Follow his crazy antics on IG at jouglas_t!) ******* This one hurts. It hurts because it's raw and real. Really. I could've deleted this episode or changed my mind about leaving it unedited so you'd think better of me, but that wouldn't be authentic or real. You need to see how the after-effects of initial sin trickle down to poison the generations of our loved ones in different ways. You need to see my mistakes and how I've hurt my beloved family, particularly my 20-year-old son who I love and adore. You also need to see how amazing Julian is, how forgiving and kind and sweet our ManCub turned out after surviving my parenting! :) (lots more stories about him at www.leighmackenzie.com. You can also read a special post I wrote about us HERE. Go check out Deuteronomy 5:8-10 about God's view of curses and blessings... #adultification #raisingchristiankids #traumaparenting #hopeandafuture #jesuslovesyou --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/support

Music trips my trigger like nothing else. See, my solo school singing stopped after my preschool graduation when I was just five years old. However, you're gonna hear me sing twice on this episode... yeah, it's scary and vulnerable to do it here, but you're getting the real vintage me. +++ DID YOU HEAR? The "She Seems So Normal: Shatter the Plastic Princess, Embrace Authentic Faith" book is now available for PREORDER in Kindle and paperback on Amazon! Go get yours right now while you listen! --leighxoxo #traumahealing #PTSD #traumawarrior #CSASurvivor #sheseemssonormal #healingpodcast #christianmarriage --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/support

Friends, there are times when you're healing that it seems like there's just too much to fix. You wonder if you'll ever be better, ever have your ISH together... I got to the point of asking God if I was just too screwed up to be normal. (Are we allowed to say "screwed up" as nice Church people? Heck, yeah, on this podcast we are!) However, there are stories throughout the Bible to strengthen us, friends surrounding us who are cheering us on, and maybe even family members who really need us to keep going and following Jesus. Scripture says we overcome d'Evil by the blood of the lamb and the word of our testimony about Jesus (Revelation 12:11). So that's what I'm gonna keep doing. +++ DID YOU HEAR? The "She Seems So Normal: Shatter the Plastic Princess, Embrace Authentic Faith" book is now available for PREORDER in Kindle and paperback on Amazon! Go get yours right now while you listen! --leighxoxo #healingpodcast #sheseemssonormal #donotgiveup #traumawarriors #honesttalkabouttherapy --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/support

Shame sucks. Research professor Dr. Brené Brown says to overcome shame, you have to speak what's unspeakable. What are we waiting for? ++++ DID YOU HEAR? The "She Seems So Normal: Shatter the Plastic Princess, Embrace Authentic Faith" book is now available for PREORDER in Kindle and paperback on Amazon! Go get yours right now while you listen! --leighxoxo #overcomeshame #healincommunity #traumawarriorsunite #biblicaltraumahealing #healingpodcast #sheseemssonormal #showyourcrown --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/support

This is the second part on PRAYING... and the power of healing. "Thank you, Father for loving me and creating me to be lovable. Help me to overcome these lies. Your almighty power and glory are overwhelming and I bow down at the throne before you. Jesus, that you protect me from wrath by your blood. Lord, light me on fire like your burning ones! Light my soul on fire with your love!" #powerfulpraying #justsayno #iambeloved #jesusheals #traumahealing #biblicaltraumahealing --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/support

How do you pray for OTHERS? How do you pray for YOURSELF? While I was perhaps good encouragement to those around me, I rarely encouraged myself in a truly godly way as I prayed. Instead, I spiritually poked “Me” with a stick, like a caged animal that is despised and hated, but one you put up with in hopes of the beast doing something good someday. In the back of my mind, I thought this was how God saw me, but it is TOTALLY not true. I mean, he saw the thief being crucified on the cross next to him, loved him, didn't despise him, and promised that man eternity. Doesn't he love me like that, too? What I realize now to be part of the predatory sexual/emotional abuse cycle, for the abused to simultaneously be the object of “love” and derision, is not actually love at all--it's wrong and sinful and sick. And it 100% does not reflect God's perfect love. In the Father's eyes, am I simultaneously loved AND despised? Nope. I am a beloved and adored child of God. Have a listen. Isaiah 43: 1, 4 and 12. 1 Corinthians 13. --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/support

Words MATTER. What we say about OURSELVES matters. How long will we allow ourselves to be infected with what others have said about us or spoken over our lives? In Christ, we have the power to CHOOSE. "My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, because human anger does not produce the righteousness that God desires. Therefore, get rid of all moral filth and the evil that is so prevalent and humbly accept the word planted in you, which can save you. Do not merely listen to the word, and so deceive yourselves. Do what it says. Anyone who listens to the word but does not do what it says is like someone who looks at his face in a mirror and, after looking at himself, goes away and immediately forgets what he looks like. But whoever looks intently into the perfect law that gives freedom, and continues in it—not forgetting what they have heard, but doing it—they will be blessed in what they do. "Those who consider themselves religious and yet do not keep a tight rein on their tongues deceive themselves, and their religion is worthless." James 1: 19-26 (NIV) --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/support

The day I took su!c!de off the table for myself changed my relationship with my son. For those of you who know him, if you thought you loved my son Jug-Bug before, you'll see now what an absolutely remarkable young man he really is. Special Announcement: Bonus Episode of my interview with Julian Mackenzie about this story coming up! Stay tuned and sign up for podcast notifications to know when that one drops... --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/support

"I just know (praying earnestly) really DOES work... I didn't care that I didn't know (all the details); I just needed it to work so that's what I prayed for. I don't understand, but God does, and so that's what faith is." *** What's the difference between praying and EARNEST praying? Ask Christopher Mackenzie. I'm bringing my sweetie on the podcast after the narrative and you're in for a treat! (You won't get THIS in the book. Aren't you excited?) SHARE this episode... we all could use a little more "Christopher Wisdom" in the world about how to love and pray for one another... #prayinghusband #christianmarriage #30yearsmarried #ChristianCouples #Christiantestimony #ChristianPodcast #healingpodcast --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/support

*****TW: Since it's National Suicide Prevention Month, I'll discuss about my own un-aliving struggles.*** If you or someone you know are struggling with this issue, please seek support and help immediately. Share this podcast episode--it's a little longer, around ten minutes, but it's worth it if it saves someone's life. RESOURCES: Click HERE for a list of worldwide suicide hotlines. Please dial "988" in the United States for the National Suicide Prevention Hotline. For toll-free European access to the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline and Veterans Crisis Line, all active-duty military, civilians, family members and contractors can reach the Lifeline by dialing DSN 118 from any Army garrison DSN phone or commercially via a toll-free European number, 00800-1273-TALK (8255) and live chat at www.militarycrisisline.net. --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/support

"There's a big difference between quietly communing with the Father on a hilltop (solitude) and sharing communion with the enemy in our heads (isolation). One spiritually blesses and builds us up; the other spiritually bludgeons and bleeds us dry." How do YOU handle stress and anxiety? 1 Peter 5: (NIV) "Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. Resist him, standing firm in the faith, because you know that the family of believers throughout the world is undergoing the same kind of sufferings." (vv 8-9) Research about solitary lions: National Geographic LINK Smithsonian LINK --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/support

TW: Description of potential physical mutilation. ************************************************ d'Evil--my name for satan... he is evil... and he doesn't deserve a capital letter indicating proper noun cuz there's NOTHING proper about his tactics and attacks. Spiritual Warfare is wicked. The enemy is a liar and a thief. He seeks to destroy our families. He seeks to destroy us. He almost succeeded with me. #panicattacks #parenting #anxietyattack #maritalissues #christianmarraige #christianfamily #spiritualwarfare --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/support

Can God piece me back together? Is there any way to be valuable after trauma? The answer to both questions is a resounding YES! Click to see images of Japanese wabi-sabi kintsugi. Click and read Jeremiah 18. --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/support

A little girl abandoned in a dark cave, afraid she's all alone until she encounters a shining man with kind, gentle eyes with scarred feet and wrists. Can she trust him? **TW: While this is a creative fiction story, it may be triggering for anyone who has endured CSA, considered su!d!dal ideation, or felt isolated in the extreme. In this episode, I also speak about the very public su!c!des of Anthony Bourdain and Kate Spade in 2018. Article on Anthony Bourdain by the New Yorker Magazine. Article on Kate Spade by the New York Times. RESOURCES: National U. S. 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline--Hours: Available 24 hours. Languages: English, Spanish. Learn more DIAL 988 --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/support

Sometimes you're too far into therapy to step back out again or stop, but it seems like you'll have to endure an epic odyssey to get through it. This is where I found myself at this point of the narrative, desiring to go back to who I was before (she was at least "functioning") but knowing I couldn't. I remind myself a little bit of the Israelites traveling with Moses longing to return to slavery in this episode. Start in Exodus 14 for reference... Be sure to rate /review the podcast and share it with others! #traumahealing #traumawarrior #traumatherapy #sheseemssonormal #exodus14 #keepgoing #youcandoit --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/support

***TW: This episode alludes to a very short portion child r@pe and s*xual vi0lence without describing it in detail and includes my PTSD/trauma reactions to finally unraveling the mystery of the Red Room.*** Have you or someone you know been the victim of CSA? What advice do you have for others who have survived? While this is very short, it was one of the hardest to read aloud. There are no details of what happened bc I wanted to shield anyone listening from the horror of knowledge of my Red Room experience, however, it is a pivotal place for me in therapy and in the narrative knowing, wait, no, UNDERSTANDING the reality of the past and yet knowing Jesus Christ has been with me through it all. (See a new translation of Psalm 23 in the TPT.) RESOURCES: RAINN Statistics Every 68 seconds, an American is sexually assaulted. And every 9 minutes, that victim is a child. National Sexual Assault Hotline--Hours: Available 24 hours, 1-800-656-4673. Learn more https://www.rainn.org/ --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/support

"... even Satan disguises himself as an angel of light." 2 Corinthians 11:14 (NASB) Have you ever been duped by a demon? Ever considered spiritual warfare? Let's just say that satan is a dirty dealer, a liar, and the master manipulator, shall we? When he convinces little girls to isolate, to covet, envy, and hate all the good in others' lives because she wants what they have for herself, you see him for what he is: evil. EXCITING NEWS: She Seems So Normal: Shatter the Plastic Princess, Embrace Authentic Faith will be published in November 2022! Follow me on IG @xoxo_leighmackenzie and on FB at Leigh Mackenzie. SPIRITUAL WARFARE RESOURCES: Mark Bubeck's classic on spiritual warfare: The Adversary: The Christian Versus Demonic Activity (Moody Publishers, 1975). The Bondage Breaker by Neil T. Anderson (Harvest House, 2019). Deep Wounds, Deep Healing by Charles H. Kraft (Chosen Books, 2010). --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/support

It was never about the effing horse. There I said it. If you need to unfollow this podcast I understand, but NOTE: I never actually say or write the real cussword... *** Dasanka was a beautiful beast who embodied, yea, personified evil to Little Me. God bless that equine, her memory became the safe place for anger, fear, and rage along with a whole host of other big emotions and thoughts over which Little Me's mulled. Embarking upon EMDR trauma therapy, the horse was the "safe" memory where my brain began while we picked locks to my deeply hidden and repressed mental vaults. Who is the author of evil? Its name is satan, or who I call d'Evil. (I refuse to offer capital letters for this fiend's name, to offer an apostrophe to offer possessive with "it's", or to recognize a "proper noun" or "title" because there is NOTHING proper about evil or from where it comes.) #TRAUMAtherapy #EMDR #emdrtherapy #misplacedanger #traumahealing #christiantraumahealing #biblicatraumahealing #traumainformed #spiritualhealing #traumahealingforwomen --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/support

FORGET 50/50. Marriage is always 60/40. You never know who's giving what or where you're sliding on the scale in that 20% spread, especially when you've been married 30 years like Christopher and me. "Cancer SUCKS - Becoming Orphans" is about the TRAUMA of losing a parent inside of the TRAUMA of a world pandemic inside the TRAUMA of reconciling my own history as an extremely shattered Christian. This is a BREAKING POINT stretch, Friends. However, it's also where we see what kinda man my husband Christopher is--listen in and love him. He's a freakin champion. ********** RESOURCES: These are suggested resources, not endorsements, I thought could be helpful if you or someone you know is grieving. Focus on the Family (Grief and Loss) Lifeway Books on Grief Christianbook.com (growth through grief) Best and Worst Things To Say To Someone Grieving (secular article) GriefShare #christianmarriage #christianrelationships #christiantraumahealing #losingaparent #losinglovedonesinpandemic #christianlove #married30years #lovemyhusband #bestfriendishusband #besthusbandever #deathgrieving #death #grieving #loss --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/support

Yeah, I know. Baklava comes up a lot, doesn't it? (Click on the LINK to discover a recipe for it!) What do you do with a PTSD event? Analyze it. ******* RESOURCES: all resources are suggested resources I found that might help you. They are not endorsements. Mayo Clinic information on PTSD Intrusive Events National Institute of Health (NIH) on PTSD EMDR Therapy and Treating PTSD Intrusive Events Medical News Today article on EMDR and PTSD Treatment --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/support

**TW/CW: This episode contains discussion of ED (specifically an0rexia and bul!im!a), and vague su!cide and runaway ideations.** Any parents or tweens or teens here? (Raise yo hands! We need prayer!) The TEENAGER. She's a toughie, huh? I lived 35+ years with mine inside my head and she was a DOOZIE! This episode's a little longer, but PLEASE listen till the end. It'll be worth it. xoxo,Leigh **************** RESOURCES: Parenting Teens (WebMD) Raising Godly Teens (Focus On The Family) Bible Verses (Bible Study Tools) --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/support

Ever been emotionally hijacked... by your OWN BRAIN? **** My husband Christopher tells me he's leaving for business. A month in advance. Cuz he's thoughtful and kind like that. I completely WIG OUT. WHY? It all goes back to Little Me's memories of her daddy driving away in the Red Karmann Ghia. Her cries tr!gger Adult Me. What can I do with THAT? Looks like I have to re-parent all the Little Me's in the Living Room of My Mind. *** RESOURCE IDEAS: Resources are only suggested to help and not endorsed... Crosswalk.com Healing Your Inner Child (Healthline.com) CPTSD Foundation #traumatherapy #traumahealing #reparenting #parentingyourself #christianparenting #christianliving #CSAsurvivor #overcomingthepast #abandonment #abandonmentissues #childhoodabandonmentissues #christiantraumatherapy #biblicatraumatherapy #biblicaltraumarecovery #biblicatraumahealing --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/support

Recovering from trauma isn't all serious business, even when you're doing it before a world lockdown. Back before Christmas 2019 and before we had any inkling of the brewing pandemic a mere three months later, I began EMDR trauma therapy. Perfect timing. From a distance, it's good looking back and laughing at some of these stories, seeing how far (and how NOT far!) I've come through the valley. Maybe you'll be nodding in agreement, understanding what happened that morning because you've done the same thing. Or maybe you can laugh and understand better the next time it happens to someone you love. *** #traumahealing #christmas2019 #anxiety #mentors #perfectionism #perfectionist --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/support

How many times has the LORD sent someone to help and YOU MISSED THEM? *** Huge shoutout to my 2019-2020 posse by name: Dr. Michele Novotni; Allison Harris; Tara Krueger (my EMDR therapist); Robin Wisner (compassionate processing partner); Tina Chambers Smith and Judy Dunagan (spiritual warfare teaching); Delphine Kirkland (all-night, any-time prayer support); Wilma Hollis (butt-kickin' love)... #mentorship #prayerwarriors #battlebuddies #traumahealing --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/support

You might think I'm crazy for asking, BUT... Have you ever imagined people from the Bible as Disney characters OR applied a rose-colored kaleidoscope to Scripture when it comes to strong emotions like ANGER? I laughed writing this episode thinking about Moses and meditating on King David. Sadly, I had to cut one of my favorite illustrations about Jonah's anger... so here's something special that can only be found in the podcast notes! : "Even surly, barfed-up Jonah, after reluctantly preaching repentance for three days throughout Ninevah to save the evil empire, vomits his own anger onto God for not witnessing the judgment and instant destruction of 120, 000 Assyrian city-dwellers. Jonah did NOT do anger well, and personally, I won't copy his example, but God listened to his chosen prophet's outrage, quietly responding without words using a hungry worm. (Let that be another warning to us about living in anger!)" Jonah 4 *** Psalm 23 (AMP); Psalm 13 (NIV). #traumahealing #bibleteaching #honestemotions #god --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/support

If you're losing your ISH all over the place as I did, you might consider some professional help. ;) Wisdom matters: Proverbs 15: 22; 11: 14; 20: 18. *** Yeah, it's not a pretty story, but I'm still calling out my buddy Johnno in this episode. Funny, I think he now works for the sheriff... #traumahealing #tramastory #churchantics #ouch #angrymomma #angerissues --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/support

Hey, Friends! It's Leigh. I took a few weeks off to finish up edits on the book, "She Seems So Normal: Shattering the Plastic Princess, Embracing Authentic Faith" but we're back on track for more podcast episodes! **All you bakers out there gonna be shakin yo' heads...** (PYREX FOLLIES) Maybe I'm the only one, but have you ever overreacted to something that shouldn't be a big deal and wondered, WHAT was THAT about? +++++++++ Here's a cycle I've found in my trauma: Calm —> Pain—> Surprise —>Anger —> Panic In this episode, look for the coping mechanisms I use to bring it back from Panic --> Pain --> Calm. #trauma #traumahealing #copingmechanisms #bakingdisasters #christianparenting #traumacycle --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/support

A walk into darkness. Learned Helpless and Trained Powerlessness. Elephants. Pointed questions answered. * **POTENTIAL TRIGGER WARNING EPISODE** Though there is no explicit content, some listeners may have a trauma-triggered response. Subject matter contains vague descriptions of SA, r@pe, intimidation, and coercion. * I thought my experience was a relic of a bygone era. Sadly, we haven't come very far. Earlier this year in January/February 2022, every major online news source reported a startling epidemic of more than 150 SA cases at the US Air Force Academy at Colorado Springs, US Military Academy at West Point, and US Naval Academy at Annapolis. These are just the cadets and midshipmen who felt safe enough to come forward to report their abuse. Cadets and midshipmen at all three principal service academies reported more incidents of sexu@l @ssault than in previous years. --By Karoun Demirjian Washington Post article (February 17, 2022) Click HERE to read more. “The women in the Class of 1980—the first to include female cadets—were able to say unequivocally they were treated differently because of their sex. They spoke of the @ssaults and harassment they faced both at the academy and once they entered the Army. “Brig. Gen. Cindy Jebb, who now serves as the Dean of the Academic Board at West Point, arrived two years later as a member of the Class of 1982. Looking back at her cadet career she said, ‘I think it's safe to say we were probably all sexually harassed.'” (https://www.army.mil/article/236362/the_army_is_changing_current_female_cadets_will_enter_the_army_with_more_career_options_than_ever) * SEXUAL ASSAULT SUPPORT RESOURCES: Click HERE for Resources on R@pe, Sexu@l Ass@ult, and D0mestic Vi0lence Get help 24/7 1-800-656-4673. (National Sexu@l Ass@ult Telephone Hotline) Call: National Center for Victims of Crime, Victim Connect Resource Center 1-855-4-VICTIM (1-855-484-2846) Call National Teen Dating @buse Hotline: 1-866-331-9474 National Child @buse Hotline/Child Help: 1-800-4-A-CHILD (1-800-422-4453) #traumawarrior #traumainformed #ptsdwarrior #traumarecovery #traumasurvivor #survivor #ptsd #ptsdisadailybattle #ptsdawareness #ptsdsurvivor #csasurvivor #recoveryjourney #traumahealing #csahealing #selfcare #christianwriter #faithstory #mentalhealthandchurch #sexuala@ssault #usmilitaryacademy #westpointmilitaryacademy #womeninthemilitary #soldierSA #usmacadetr@pe #noisno --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/support

**POTENTIAL TRIGGER WARNING: Contains potentially mature content. Vague descriptions of hazing, intimidation, and coercion.** What do grenades have to do with a trauma journey? In 1989, I received my congressional nomination for the prestigious US Military Academy at West Point, and though I believe the culture has changed in the decades since I attended, my story focuses on what it used to be back then and how the system solidified parts of the Plastic Princess I became. * * “The women in the Class of 1980—the first to include female cadets—were able to say unequivocally they were treated differently because of their sex. They spoke of the @ssaults and h@rassment they faced both at the academy and once they entered the Army. “Brig. Gen. Cindy Jebb, who now serves as the Dean of the Academic Board at West Point, arrived two years later as a member of the Class of 1982. Looking back at her cadet career she said, ‘I think it's safe to say we were probably all se#ually harassed.'” (https://www.army.mil/article/236362/the_army_is_changing_current_female_cadets_will_enter_the_army_with_more_career_options_than_ever) #traumawarrior #traumainformed #ptsdwarrior #traumarecovery #traumasurvivor #survivor #ptsd #ptsdisadailybattle #ptsdawareness #ptsdsurvivor #csasurvivor #recoveryjourney #traumahealing #csahealing #selfcare #christianwriter #faithstory #mentalhealthandmilitary #SA #usmilitaryacademy #westpointmilitaryacademy #womeninthemilitary #soldiersa --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/support

People say it takes courage to go through therapy and tell their story. I haven't felt courageous whatsoever. Mostly, I've felt terrified, afraid of really knowing - and afraid of never knowing - what my issues were. If courage is the ability to persevere and withstand danger, fear, or difficulty, any courage that people see in me is the Holy Spirit. I just keep clinging to him, clinging to the Cross and Resurrection of Jesus Christ, knowing that if God has the power to raise a man from the dead, he can raise me up, too. And, as in the book of Ezekiel, if he can raise my dry and dusty bones up out of the grave, he can use me to help encourage others to do it in their own lives as well. #traumawarrior #traumainformed #ptsdwarrior #traumarecovery #traumasurvivor #survivor #ptsd #ptsdisadailybattle #ptsdawareness #ptsdsurvivor #csasurvivor #recoveryjourney #traumahealing #csahealing #selfcare #christianwriter #faithstory #jesusheals --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/support

How do you describe severe anxiety or how trauma makes the body feel to someone who's never experienced it? With a DRAGON, of course! So the LORD God said to the serpent: “Because you have done this, cursed are you above all livestock and every beast of the field! On your belly will you go, and dust you will eat, all the days of your life. And I will put enmity between you and the woman, and between your seed and her seed. He will crush your head, and you will strike his heel.” Genesis 3:14-15 (NIV) #traumawarrior #traumainformed #ptsdwarrior #traumarecovery #traumasurvivor #survivor #ptsd #ptsdisadailybattle #ptsdawareness #ptsdsurvivor #csasurvivor #recoveryjourney #traumahealing #csahealing #selfcare #christianwriter #faithstory #predatorygrooming #jesusheals #ptsdepisode #learnedhelplessness #understandinganxiety --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/support

***WARNING: Though there is nothing explicit or overly descriptive, this episode contains material about su!cide ideation and depression.*** As someone who's struggled with mental health and trauma, I often wondered if I was disqualified not just from Christian service, but from being Christian... (Did I mention we're tackling hard questions here?) *** I wonder if mental illness struggles are the "new leprosy" inside the Bride of Christ. No one wants to talk about or touch it, and if you say you're getting counseling, people appear nervous or seemingly avoid you each time you enter the room. -->>The National Su!cide Prevention Lifeline is a United States-based suicide prevention network of over 160 crisis centers that provides 24/7 service via a toll-free hotline with the number 1-800-273-8255. It is available to anyone in su!cidal crisis or emotional distress.>If You Know Someone in Crisis Call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline (Lifeline) at 1-800-273-TALK (8255), or text the Crisis Text Line (text HELLO to 741741). Both services are free and available 24 hours a day, seven days a week. All calls are confidential. Contact social media outlets directly if you are concerned about a friend's social media updates or dial 911 in an emergency. The Veterans Crisis Line connects Service members and Veterans in crisis, as well as their family members and friends, with qualified Department of Veteran's Affairs (VA) responders through a confidential toll-free hotline, online chat, or text messaging service. Dial 1-800-273-8255 and Press 1 to talk to someone or send a text message to 838255 to connect with a VA responder. #traumawarrior #traumainformed #ptsdwarrior #traumarecovery #traumasurvivor #survivor #ptsd #ptsdisadailybattle #ptsdawareness #ptsdsurvivor #csasurvivor #recoveryjourney #traumahealing #csahealing #selfcare #christianwriter #faithstory #mentalhealthandchurch --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/leigh-mackenzie/support