The DTPHD Podcast by David Tian, Ph.D.

In this interview, you're going to hear me open up in a way that many of my followers have likely not heard before. This video is about my experience of discovering the only thing truly worth living (or dying) for. Unconditional love is a strange concept for a lot of guys. They think they know what "unconditional love" means. But only when you begin to love all your most vulnerable parts unconditionally -- the ones holding the shame, fear, sadness, etc. -- are you then able to love an intimate partner unconditionally. Unconditional love means that when we choose to give love, we love that person without conditions. Unconditional love does not mean disrespecting healthy boundaries, accepting abuse, or permitting harm. Healthy boundaries are good for both parties. Spoiling the child is not good for you or the child. Similarly, becoming codependent is not good for either partner. Unconditional love also does not mean indiscriminate love. It does not mean we love everyone, always, equally. That's indiscriminate. Unconditional love means that when choose to give love to someone, we do so without expecting any return, regardless of the circumstances. Beware the feeling of what you think might be ”unconditional love” in a romantic relationship unless you have already discovered this state in a non-romantic relationship. There is too much else mixed in with romantic relationships — sexual desire, ego validation, peer approval, finances, etc. — for the novice to disentangle or isolate from it the element of unconditional love. This is much better learned from loving an innocent party, such as your child (or god-daughter, in my case) or even your pet dog. Once you understand the meaning and experience the depth of unconditional love, you enter an entirely new dimension of reality. I really hope you enjoy this video! ***** For over a decade, David Tian, Ph.D., has helped hundreds of thousands of people from over 87 countries find happiness, success, and fulfillment in their social, professional, and love lives. His presentations - whether keynotes, seminars, or workshops - leave clients with insights into their behavior, psychology, and keys to their empowerment. His training methodologies are the result of over a decade of coaching, therapy, and education of thousands of students around the world. Join him on the “DTPHD Podcast” as he explores deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. Subscribe now. Connect with David Tian here: Website: https://www.davidtianphd.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/davidtianphd DTPHD Podcast Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ Man Up Show Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/manupcommunity/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/TheAuraUniversity Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/davidtianphd/ Podcast: https://www.davidtianphd.com/dtphdpodcast Medium: https://medium.com/@davidtian Twitter: https://twitter.com/davidtianphd ***** For transcriptions and more free resources, go here: https://www.davidtianphd.com/life-decisions/true-meaning-of-life/  

***** Join the launch of Stefan Ravalli's "Self-Made Mind" here: https://tenshin.mykajabi.com/free-mindfulness-course ***** Join David Tian on the “DTPHD Podcast” as we explore deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. Join our private Facebook group here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ ***** Get free access to Stefan and David's new mantra meditation course here: https://www.tenshinmindfulness.com/ ***** For over a decade, David Tian, Ph.D., has helped hundreds of thousands of people from over 87 countries find happiness, success, and fulfillment in their social, professional, and love lives. His presentations - whether keynotes, seminars, or workshops - leave clients with insights into their behavior, psychology, and keys to their empowerment. His training methodologies are the result of over a decade of coaching, therapy, and education of thousands of students around the world. Join him on the “DTPHD Podcast” as he explores deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. Subscribe now. Connect with David Tian here: Website: https://www.davidtianphd.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/davidtianphd DTPHD Podcast Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ Man Up Show Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/manupcommunity/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/TheAuraUniversity Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/davidtianphd/ Podcast: https://www.davidtianphd.com/dtphdpodcast Medium: https://medium.com/@davidtian Twitter: https://twitter.com/davidtianphd ***** About Stefan Ravalli: Forever studying masterful humans and the art of service the world over to bring their practices to our (sometimes “service-deficient”) culture, Stefan Ravalli combines all that with his expertise in meditation, mindfulness, and communication/listening to raise the game of service professionals - and anyone looking to upgrade how they connect with others (and themselves). Learning meditation was a game-changer for Stefan. It gave him the inner strength to be his unique self (without the negative self-talk!), connect with others better, and live a healthy happy life. Meditation also makes you realize your potential and gives you the fearlessness to pursue bigger and better things you never thought possible, so Stefan left a leadership role at a high-profile bar/restaurant to India to teach meditation. After doing that for years and deepening his tea ceremony practice, Stefan realized that the art of service was the richest path of self-cultivation available to him. Serving anything anywhere was the best way to apply and accelerate all the upgrades he got from meditation. So he started Serve Conscious to bring these tools and practices to anyone where service is part of their life - to awaken us to the power of service as a means of growth and self-mastery. Learn more about Stefan Ravalli here: http://serveconscious.com

***** Join David Tian on the “DTPHD Podcast” as we explore deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. Join our private Facebook group here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ ***** Get free access to Stefan and David's new mantra meditation course here: https://www.tenshinmindfulness.com/ ***** For over a decade, David Tian, Ph.D., has helped hundreds of thousands of people from over 87 countries find happiness, success, and fulfillment in their social, professional, and love lives. His presentations - whether keynotes, seminars, or workshops - leave clients with insights into their behavior, psychology, and keys to their empowerment. His training methodologies are the result of over a decade of coaching, therapy, and education of thousands of students around the world. Join him on the “DTPHD Podcast” as he explores deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. Subscribe now. Connect with David Tian here: Website: https://www.davidtianphd.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/davidtianphd DTPHD Podcast Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ Man Up Show Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/manupcommunity/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/TheAuraUniversity Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/davidtianphd/ Podcast: https://www.davidtianphd.com/dtphdpodcast Medium: https://medium.com/@davidtian Twitter: https://twitter.com/davidtianphd ***** About Stefan Ravalli: Forever studying masterful humans and the art of service the world over to bring their practices to our (sometimes “service-deficient”) culture, Stefan Ravalli combines all that with his expertise in meditation, mindfulness, and communication/listening to raise the game of service professionals - and anyone looking to upgrade how they connect with others (and themselves). Learning meditation was a game-changer for Stefan. It gave him the inner strength to be his unique self (without the negative self-talk!), connect with others better, and live a healthy happy life. Meditation also makes you realize your potential and gives you the fearlessness to pursue bigger and better things you never thought possible, so Stefan left a leadership role at a high-profile bar/restaurant to India to teach meditation. After doing that for years and deepening his tea ceremony practice, Stefan realized that the art of service was the richest path of self-cultivation available to him. Serving anything anywhere was the best way to apply and accelerate all the upgrades he got from meditation. So he started Serve Conscious to bring these tools and practices to anyone where service is part of their life - to awaken us to the power of service as a means of growth and self-mastery. Learn more about Stefan Ravalli here: http://serveconscious.com ***** Shownotes: 1:02  What's the default state of achievers, and why does it matter? 4:45  Two metaphors for how best to view the worth of a human being 8:36  How achievers become worthy of love and connection 10:35  How meditation helps you find your own value 16:44  How growing and striving relate to meeting your need for significance 20:55  When the pursuit of significance becomes unhealthy 25:01  One of the big downsides from being in the Flow state 27:26  Why people put off their happiness 30:44  How to find fulfillment in the present 36:11  Why achievers don't believe they're enough 40:33  This is what achievers fear when they reach their goals 45:56   What happens when you let go of striving for significance 49:02  The advantage of finding fulfillment in the present

***** This talk is a short excerpt from a private Zoom seminar in May 2020 as part of the Aura Mastermind. The accompanying text for this seminar is Richard Schwartz, “You Are The One You've Been Waiting For”: https://ifs-institute.com/store/37 ***** Join David Tian on the “DTPHD Podcast” as we explore deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. Join our private Facebook group here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ ***** Get free access to Stefan and David's new mantra meditation course here: https://www.tenshinmindfulness.com/ ***** For over a decade, David Tian, Ph.D., has helped hundreds of thousands of people from over 87 countries find happiness, success, and fulfillment in their social, professional, and love lives. His presentations - whether keynotes, seminars, or workshops - leave clients with insights into their behavior, psychology, and keys to their empowerment. His training methodologies are the result of over a decade of coaching, therapy, and education of thousands of students around the world. Join him on the “DTPHD Podcast” as he explores deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. Subscribe now. Connect with David Tian here: Website: https://www.davidtianphd.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/davidtianphd DTPHD Podcast Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ Man Up Show Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/manupcommunity/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/TheAuraUniversity Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/davidtianphd/ Podcast: https://www.davidtianphd.com/dtphdpodcast Medium: https://medium.com/@davidtian Twitter: https://twitter.com/davidtianphd ***** What An Unconditional Love Relationship Is Like Between Two True Selves Shownotes 1:02 David Tian Ph.D. explains how our various parts work in a relationship 9:28 What are exiled parts of ourselves? 15:52 This happens when you are the primary source of love for your parts 17:59 The three ways your most vulnerable parts were exiled 24:03 What qualities do we lose when parts of us are exiled? 26:00 This is how exiles feel in an intimate relationship 32:48 What extreme belief do our parts have about intimate relationships? 41:15 How attachment re-injuries impact our intimate relationships 46:55 How your partner can become your "tor-mentor" 50:49 The problem with our exiled parts 53:30 The solution to the problem with our exiled parts 56:08 Two major types of love 1:00:53 Common manifestations of protective parts in intimate relationships 1:03:22 Relationship troubleshooting issues to look out for

***** Join David Tian on the “DTPHD Podcast” as we explore deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. Join our private Facebook group here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ ***** Get free access to Stefan and David's new mantra meditation course here: https://www.tenshinmindfulness.com/ ***** For over a decade, David Tian, Ph.D., has helped hundreds of thousands of people from over 87 countries find happiness, success, and fulfillment in their social, professional, and love lives. His presentations - whether keynotes, seminars, or workshops - leave clients with insights into their behavior, psychology, and keys to their empowerment. His training methodologies are the result of over a decade of coaching, therapy, and education of thousands of students around the world. Join him on the “DTPHD Podcast” as he explores deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. Subscribe now. Connect with David Tian here: Website: https://www.davidtianphd.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/davidtianphd DTPHD Podcast Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ Man Up Show Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/manupcommunity/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/TheAuraUniversity Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/davidtianphd/ Podcast: https://www.davidtianphd.com/dtphdpodcast Medium: https://medium.com/@davidtian Twitter: https://twitter.com/davidtianphd ***** About Stefan Ravalli: Forever studying masterful humans and the art of service the world over to bring their practices to our (sometimes “service-deficient”) culture, Stefan Ravalli combines all that with his expertise in meditation, mindfulness, and communication/listening to raise the game of service professionals - and anyone looking to upgrade how they connect with others (and themselves). Learning meditation was a game-changer for Stefan. It gave him the inner strength to be his unique self (without the negative self-talk!), connect with others better, and live a healthy happy life. Meditation also makes you realize your potential and gives you the fearlessness to pursue bigger and better things you never thought possible, so Stefan left a leadership role at a high-profile bar/restaurant to India to teach meditation. After doing that for years and deepening his tea ceremony practice, Stefan realized that the art of service was the richest path of self-cultivation available to him. Serving anything anywhere was the best way to apply and accelerate all the upgrades he got from meditation. So he started Serve Conscious to bring these tools and practices to anyone where service is part of their life - to awaken us to the power of service as a means of growth and self-mastery. Learn more about Stefan Ravalli here: http://serveconscious.com ***** Should You Meditate? | DTPHD Podcast 32 Shownotes: 2:04 This is the most beneficial part of meditation 6:54 The most common reasons people do not stick with their meditation practice 11:25 Can meditation address specific “problem areas”? 14:43 The meditation app that David Tian Ph.D. recommends the most 19:06 Which meditation practice is best for you? 24:32 What do different types of meditation lead to? 28:48 This is how you know a meditation practice is working for you 33:25 The two meditation obstacles that people encounter most often 37:56 How can you gauge the results of meditation? 40:17 Skills you can learn from your meditation practice 44:45 What expectations should you have when it comes to your meditation practice

***** This talk was originally filmed in late 2019 in at the W Taipei hotel. ***** Join David Tian on the “DTPHD Podcast” as we explore deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. Join our private Facebook group here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ ***** For over a decade, David Tian, Ph.D., has helped hundreds of thousands of people from over 87 countries find happiness, success, and fulfillment in their social, professional, and love lives. His presentations - whether keynotes, seminars, or workshops - leave clients with insights into their behavior, psychology, and keys to their empowerment. His training methodologies are the result of over a decade of coaching, therapy, and education of thousands of students around the world. Join him on the “DTPHD Podcast” as he explores deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. Subscribe now. Connect with David Tian here: Website: https://www.davidtianphd.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/davidtianphd DTPHD Podcast Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ Man Up Show Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/manupcommunity/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/TheAuraUniversity Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/davidtianphd/ Podcast: https://www.davidtianphd.com/dtphdpodcast Medium: https://medium.com/@davidtian Twitter: https://twitter.com/davidtianphd *****

***** Join David Tian on the “DTPHD Podcast” as we explore deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. Join our private Facebook group here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ ***** Get free access to Stefan and David's new mantra meditation course here: https://www.tenshinmindfulness.com/ ***** For over a decade, David Tian, Ph.D., has helped hundreds of thousands of people from over 87 countries find happiness, success, and fulfillment in their social, professional, and love lives. His presentations - whether keynotes, seminars, or workshops - leave clients with insights into their behavior, psychology, and keys to their empowerment. His training methodologies are the result of over a decade of coaching, therapy, and education of thousands of students around the world. Join him on the “DTPHD Podcast” as he explores deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. Subscribe now. Connect with David Tian here: Website: https://www.davidtianphd.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/davidtianphd DTPHD Podcast Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ Man Up Show Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/manupcommunity/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/TheAuraUniversity Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/davidtianphd/ Podcast: https://www.davidtianphd.com/dtphdpodcast Medium: https://medium.com/@davidtian Twitter: https://twitter.com/davidtianphd ***** About Stefan Ravalli: Forever studying masterful humans and the art of service the world over to bring their practices to our (sometimes “service-deficient”) culture, Stefan Ravalli combines all that with his expertise in meditation, mindfulness, and communication/listening to raise the game of service professionals - and anyone looking to upgrade how they connect with others (and themselves). Learning meditation was a game-changer for Stefan. It gave him the inner strength to be his unique self (without the negative self-talk!), connect with others better, and live a healthy happy life. Meditation also makes you realize your potential and gives you the fearlessness to pursue bigger and better things you never thought possible, so Stefan left a leadership role at a high-profile bar/restaurant to India to teach meditation. After doing that for years and deepening his tea ceremony practice, Stefan realized that the art of service was the richest path of self-cultivation available to him. Serving anything anywhere was the best way to apply and accelerate all the upgrades he got from meditation. So he started Serve Conscious to bring these tools and practices to anyone where service is part of their life - to awaken us to the power of service as a means of growth and self-mastery. Learn more about Stefan Ravalli here: http://serveconscious.com ***** Shownotes: 3:35 What are the two toxic extremes when it comes to trying to meet your needs? 7:55 Why connection is one of the highest human needs 14:24 How the need for connection is universal to all human beings 18:22 Why people often deny their emotional needs 23:33 How to meet your needs successfully

***** Join David Tian on the “DTPHD Podcast” as we explore deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. Join our private Facebook group here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ ***** For over a decade, David Tian, Ph.D., has helped hundreds of thousands of people from over 87 countries find happiness, success, and fulfillment in their social, professional, and love lives. His presentations - whether keynotes, seminars, or workshops - leave clients with insights into their behavior, psychology, and keys to their empowerment. His training methodologies are the result of over a decade of coaching, therapy, and education of thousands of students around the world. Join him on the “DTPHD Podcast” as he explores deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. Subscribe now. Connect with David Tian here: Website: https://www.davidtianphd.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/davidtianphd DTPHD Podcast Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ Man Up Show Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/manupcommunity/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/TheAuraUniversity Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/davidtianphd/ Podcast: https://www.davidtianphd.com/dtphdpodcast Medium: https://medium.com/@davidtian Twitter: https://twitter.com/davidtianphd ***** HENRY CHONG is our special guest speaker on this episode. Henry is Director of Fusang Capital, a fund management company that manages the assets of multi-family offices. He is also a Director at the Portcullis Group, Asia's biggest independent group of trust companies, providing comprehensive wealth administration to high-net-worth individuals, providing a one-stop shop for corporate, trustee, and fund administration services to individuals, family offices, philanthropies, private banks, and investment managers. Henry is a graduate of Oxford University with a B.A. (Hons) in Philosophy Politics & Economics and is a founder of the Oxford Economics Society. He also holds a M.Sc. in Behavioral Science from the London School of Economics and is a Fellow of the Royal Society of Arts (FRSC). He will be sharing with us from his deep insights in behavioral economics, finance, health, and psychology. Connect with Henry here: http://henrychong.com/http://henrychong.com/ ***** Shownotes: 2:24 How to define our needs for certainty and uncertainty in our lives 7:09 Why people are afraid of uncertainty 8:35 Understanding certainty and uncertainty through Campbell's Jungian framework of the Hero's Journey 11:49 What are the opportunities in this period of uncertainty? 17:49 How your life success is related to your threshold of uncertainty 22:16 The importance of setting limits amidst these opportunities

***** Join David Tian on the “DTPHD Podcast” as we explore deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. Join our private Facebook group here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ ***** Get free access to Stefan and David's new mantra meditation course here: https://www.tenshinmindfulness.com/ ***** For over a decade, David Tian, Ph.D., has helped hundreds of thousands of people from over 87 countries find happiness, success, and fulfillment in their social, professional, and love lives. His presentations - whether keynotes, seminars, or workshops - leave clients with insights into their behavior, psychology, and keys to their empowerment. His training methodologies are the result of over a decade of coaching, therapy, and education of thousands of students around the world. Join him on the “DTPHD Podcast” as he explores deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. Subscribe now. Connect with David Tian here: Website: https://www.davidtianphd.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/davidtianphd DTPHD Podcast Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ Man Up Show Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/manupcommunity/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/TheAuraUniversity Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/davidtianphd/ Podcast: https://www.davidtianphd.com/dtphdpodcast Medium: https://medium.com/@davidtian Twitter: https://twitter.com/davidtianphd ***** About Stefan Ravalli: Forever studying masterful humans and the art of service the world over to bring their practices to our (sometimes “service-deficient”) culture, Stefan Ravalli combines all that with his expertise in meditation, mindfulness, and communication/listening to raise the game of service professionals - and anyone looking to upgrade how they connect with others (and themselves). Learning meditation was a game-changer for Stefan. It gave him the inner strength to be his unique self (without the negative self-talk!), connect with others better, and live a healthy happy life. Meditation also makes you realize your potential and gives you the fearlessness to pursue bigger and better things you never thought possible, so Stefan left a leadership role at a high-profile bar/restaurant to India to teach meditation. After doing that for years and deepening his tea ceremony practice, Stefan realized that the art of service was the richest path of self-cultivation available to him. Serving anything anywhere was the best way to apply and accelerate all the upgrades he got from meditation. So he started Serve Conscious to bring these tools and practices to anyone where service is part of their life - to awaken us to the power of service as a means of growth and self-mastery. Learn more about Stefan Ravalli here: http://serveconscious.com ***** Shownotes: 1:00 Why some people think “judging” is bad and wrong 6:44 Are there drawbacks for judging? 13:55 Why should we stay open to judgment? 18:15 The difference between subjectivism and relativism, and why it matters 22:34 What is the value of non-judgment? 30:20 The value of leaning into discomfort ***** Transcription and free resources are available here: https://www.davidtianphd.com/podcast/why-judging/

***** Join David Tian on the “DTPHD Podcast” as we explore deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. Join our private Facebook group here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ ***** Get free access to Stefan and David's new mantra meditation course here: https://www.tenshinmindfulness.com/ ***** For over a decade, David Tian, Ph.D., has helped hundreds of thousands of people from over 87 countries find happiness, success, and fulfillment in their social, professional, and love lives. His presentations - whether keynotes, seminars, or workshops - leave clients with insights into their behavior, psychology, and keys to their empowerment. His training methodologies are the result of over a decade of coaching, therapy, and education of thousands of students around the world. Join him on the “DTPHD Podcast” as he explores deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. Subscribe now. Connect with David Tian here: Website: https://www.davidtianphd.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/davidtianphd DTPHD Podcast Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ Man Up Show Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/manupcommunity/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/TheAuraUniversity Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/davidtianphd/ Podcast: https://www.davidtianphd.com/dtphdpodcast Medium: https://medium.com/@davidtian Twitter: https://twitter.com/davidtianphd ***** About Stefan Ravalli: Forever studying masterful humans and the art of service the world over to bring their practices to our (sometimes “service-deficient”) culture, Stefan Ravalli combines all that with his expertise in meditation, mindfulness, and communication/listening to raise the game of service professionals - and anyone looking to upgrade how they connect with others (and themselves). Learning meditation was a game-changer for Stefan. It gave him the inner strength to be his unique self (without the negative self-talk!), connect with others better, and live a healthy happy life. Meditation also makes you realize your potential and gives you the fearlessness to pursue bigger and better things you never thought possible, so Stefan left a leadership role at a high-profile bar/restaurant to India to teach meditation. After doing that for years and deepening his tea ceremony practice, Stefan realized that the art of service was the richest path of self-cultivation available to him. Serving anything anywhere was the best way to apply and accelerate all the upgrades he got from meditation. So he started Serve Conscious to bring these tools and practices to anyone where service is part of their life - to awaken us to the power of service as a means of growth and self-mastery. Learn more about Stefan Ravalli here: http://serveconscious.com ***** Shownotes: 1:04 How is gratitude a practice? 4:00 How gratitude affects your other life goals 9:08 What is the difference between process orientation and goal orientation, and why does it matter? 16:30 This happens when you are grateful for the things you have now 19:13 The key connection between gratitude and the vantage point of trust 24:23 How to turn anger into something positive 27:18 The importance of acknowledging and appreciating the emotions we feel 32:15 How psychological healing is related to being grateful 37:00 The power that comes from appreciating your life 40:08 How to practice gratitude in your life ***** Transcription and free resources are available here: https://www.davidtianphd.com/podcast/gratitude-drives-out-fear/

***** Join David Tian on the “DTPHD Podcast” as we explore deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. Join our private Facebook group here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ ***** Get free access to Stefan and David's new mantra meditation course here: https://www.tenshinmindfulness.com/ ***** For over a decade, David Tian, Ph.D., has helped hundreds of thousands of people from over 87 countries find happiness, success, and fulfillment in their social, professional, and love lives. His presentations - whether keynotes, seminars, or workshops - leave clients with insights into their behavior, psychology, and keys to their empowerment. His training methodologies are the result of over a decade of coaching, therapy, and education of thousands of students around the world. Join him on the “DTPHD Podcast” as he explores deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. Subscribe now. Connect with David Tian here: Website: https://www.davidtianphd.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/davidtianphd DTPHD Podcast Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ Man Up Show Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/manupcommunity/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/TheAuraUniversity Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/davidtianphd/ Podcast: https://www.davidtianphd.com/dtphdpodcast Medium: https://medium.com/@davidtian Twitter: https://twitter.com/davidtianphd ***** About Stefan Ravalli: Forever studying masterful humans and the art of service the world over to bring their practices to our (sometimes “service-deficient”) culture, Stefan Ravalli combines all that with his expertise in meditation, mindfulness, and communication/listening to raise the game of service professionals - and anyone looking to upgrade how they connect with others (and themselves). Learning meditation was a game-changer for Stefan. It gave him the inner strength to be his unique self (without the negative self-talk!), connect with others better, and live a healthy happy life. Meditation also makes you realize your potential and gives you the fearlessness to pursue bigger and better things you never thought possible, so Stefan left a leadership role at a high-profile bar/restaurant to India to teach meditation. After doing that for years and deepening his tea ceremony practice, Stefan realized that the art of service was the richest path of self-cultivation available to him. Serving anything anywhere was the best way to apply and accelerate all the upgrades he got from meditation. So he started Serve Conscious to bring these tools and practices to anyone where service is part of their life - to awaken us to the power of service as a means of growth and self-mastery. Learn more about Stefan Ravalli here: http://serveconscious.com ***** Shownotes: 1:20 One of the most important principles for success in life is this 4:36 What practice means to mindful living 8:11 What happens when you're not balanced and in your true self 11:08 This all-important second layer of practice 15:11 The most helpful practice for beginners 21:00 What does meditation really give you? 28:07 How to discover for yourself what you truly need Transcription and free resources are available here: https://www.davidtianphd.com/podcast/practice-of-practice/  

***** Join David Tian on the “DTPHD Podcast” as we explore deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. Join our private Facebook group here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ ***** Get free access to Stefan and David's new mantra meditation course here: https://www.tenshinmindfulness.com/ ***** For over a decade, David Tian, Ph.D., has helped hundreds of thousands of people from over 87 countries find happiness, success, and fulfillment in their social, professional, and love lives. His presentations - whether keynotes, seminars, or workshops - leave clients with insights into their behavior, psychology, and keys to their empowerment. His training methodologies are the result of over a decade of coaching, therapy, and education of thousands of students around the world. Join him on the “DTPHD Podcast” as he explores deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. Subscribe now. Connect with David Tian here: Website: https://www.davidtianphd.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/davidtianphd DTPHD Podcast Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ Man Up Show Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/manupcommunity/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/TheAuraUniversity Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/davidtianphd/ Podcast: https://www.davidtianphd.com/dtphdpodcast Medium: https://medium.com/@davidtian Twitter: https://twitter.com/davidtianphd ***** Celebrity personal trainer, peak performance health coach and podcaster Ted Ryce has overcome a tremendous amount in his quest to live a legendary life. Ryce has worked with Fortune 500 CEOs, busy professionals, and celebrities, including Richard Branson, Ricky Martin, and Robert Downey Jr. Connect with Ted here: https://legendarylifepodcast.com/free ***** Show Notes: 2:40 How Ted overcame extreme adversity and changed his outlook on life to live his best life 10:25 The brain-body connection, does it matter? 14:40 The difference between pain and suffering, and why this is key to overcoming trauma 18:14 How the stories you tell yourself shape your reality 19:35 The difference between feelings and emotions, and how this is integral to your happiness 21:16 How the mind and the body are inextricably connected and why we mistakenly tried to split them 26:44 Being fully present as a way of life 32:23 One of the best ways to find happiness, fulfillment, and flow *** Transcription and free resources are available here: https://www.davidtianphd.com/podcast/psychological-healing-and-growth/

***** Join David Tian on the “DTPHD Podcast” as we explore deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. Join our private Facebook group here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ ***** Get free access to Stefan and David's new mantra meditation course here: https://www.tenshinmindfulness.com/ ***** For over a decade, David Tian, Ph.D., has helped hundreds of thousands of people from over 87 countries find happiness, success, and fulfillment in their social, professional, and love lives. His presentations - whether keynotes, seminars, or workshops - leave clients with insights into their behavior, psychology, and keys to their empowerment. His training methodologies are the result of over a decade of coaching, therapy, and education of thousands of students around the world. Join him on the “DTPHD Podcast” as he explores deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. Subscribe now. Connect with David Tian here: Website: https://www.davidtianphd.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/davidtianphd DTPHD Podcast Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ Man Up Show Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/manupcommunity/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/TheAuraUniversity Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/davidtianphd/ Podcast: https://www.davidtianphd.com/dtphdpodcast Medium: https://medium.com/@davidtian Twitter: https://twitter.com/davidtianphd ***** About Stefan Ravalli: Forever studying masterful humans and the art of service the world over to bring their practices to our (sometimes “service-deficient”) culture, Stefan Ravalli combines all that with his expertise in meditation, mindfulness, and communication/listening to raise the game of service professionals - and anyone looking to upgrade how they connect with others (and themselves). Learning meditation was a game-changer for Stefan. It gave him the inner strength to be his unique self (without the negative self-talk!), connect with others better, and live a healthy happy life. Meditation also makes you realize your potential and gives you the fearlessness to pursue bigger and better things you never thought possible, so Stefan left a leadership role at a high-profile bar/restaurant to India to teach meditation. After doing that for years and deepening his tea ceremony practice, Stefan realized that the art of service was the richest path of self-cultivation available to him. Serving anything anywhere was the best way to apply and accelerate all the upgrades he got from meditation. So he started Serve Conscious to bring these tools and practices to anyone where service is part of their life - to awaken us to the power of service as a means of growth and self-mastery. Learn more about Stefan Ravalli here: http://serveconscious.com ***** Show Notes: 1:29 This is what most people do about their comfort zones 5:05 How to become comfortable with the uncomfortable 10:25 Is experiencing tension good or bad? 14:22 What causes resistance and repression? 18:50 How to know whether you're feeling fear or excitement when you're at the edge of your comfort zone 22:08 How to step beyond your comfort zone with the least effort 26:20 The mindset you should have in order to grow out of your comfort zone naturally *** Transcription and free resources are available here: https://www.davidtianphd.com/podcast/grow-out-of-your-comfort-zone/

***** Join David Tian on the “DTPHD Podcast” as we explore deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. Join our private Facebook group here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ ***** Get free access to Stefan and David's new mantra meditation course here: https://www.tenshinmindfulness.com/ ***** For over a decade, David Tian, Ph.D., has helped hundreds of thousands of people from over 87 countries find happiness, success, and fulfillment in their social, professional, and love lives. His presentations - whether keynotes, seminars, or workshops - leave clients with insights into their behavior, psychology, and keys to their empowerment. His training methodologies are the result of over a decade of coaching, therapy, and education of thousands of students around the world. Join him on the “DTPHD Podcast” as he explores deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. Subscribe now. Connect with David Tian here: Website: https://www.davidtianphd.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/davidtianphd DTPHD Podcast Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ Man Up Show Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/manupcommunity/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/TheAuraUniversity Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/davidtianphd/ Podcast: https://www.davidtianphd.com/dtphdpodcast Medium: https://medium.com/@davidtian Twitter: https://twitter.com/davidtianphd ***** HENRY CHONG is our special guest speaker on this episode. Henry is Director of Fusang Capital, a fund management company that manages the assets of multi-family offices. He is also a Director at the Portcullis Group, Asia's biggest independent group of trust companies, providing comprehensive wealth administration to high-net-worth individuals, providing a one-stop shop for corporate, trustee, and fund administration services to individuals, family offices, philanthropies, private banks, and investment managers. Henry is a graduate of Oxford University with a B.A. (Hons) in Philosophy Politics & Economics and is a founder of the Oxford Economics Society. He also holds a M.Sc. in Behavioral Science from the London School of Economics and is a Fellow of the Royal Society of Arts (FRSC). He will be sharing with us from his deep insights in behavioral economics, finance, health, and psychology. Connect with Henry here: http://henrychong.com/http://henrychong.com/ ***** Show Notes: 3:40 Should you choose certainty over love or love over certainty? 6:45 This is the problem all achievers face 10:40 What is the art of fulfillment, and why does it matter? 15:20 Will achievement lead to fulfillment? 20:27 What does true fulfillment feel like? 25:06 How does fitness help us understand achievement vs. fulfillment? 29:17 What is the all-important concept of Flow? 34:53 What does it feel like to be in Flow? 39:31 What is life like without challenges? 44:02 Here's the best way to handle internal resistance to accomplishing your goals

***** Join David Tian on the “DTPHD Podcast” as we explore deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. Join our private Facebook group here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ ***** For over a decade, David Tian, Ph.D., has helped hundreds of thousands of people from over 87 countries find happiness, success, and fulfillment in their social, professional, and love lives. His presentations - whether keynotes, seminars, or workshops - leave clients with insights into their behavior, psychology, and keys to their empowerment. His training methodologies are the result of over a decade of coaching, therapy, and education of thousands of students around the world. Join him on the “DTPHD Podcast” as he explores deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. Subscribe now. Connect with David Tian here: Website: https://www.davidtianphd.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/davidtianphd DTPHD Podcast Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ Man Up Show Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/manupcommunity/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/TheAuraUniversity Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/davidtianphd/ Podcast: https://www.davidtianphd.com/dtphdpodcast Medium: https://medium.com/@davidtian Twitter: https://twitter.com/davidtianphd ***** Show Notes: 2:40 What David and Micha have learned from many years in the pursuit of success 6:39 Why you need to "turn inward" to understand yourself and life fully 10:33 The crucial connections between narcissism, co-dependency, and addiction, and why these are important for EVERYONE 15:50 This is why many men get into "game" when it comes to their dating lives 18:27 What emotions make life most worth living? 24:24 The root causes of almost all human suffering 28:14 How to tap into your most powerful emotions 33:20 What's lies underneath our anger that can not only soften it but also harness it 37:40 How to eliminate your fears 42:03 Why meditation will change your life ***** Transcription and free resources are available here: https://www.davidtianphd.com/podcast/gratitude-drives-out-fear/

***** This episode is a psychological analysis of the Joker 2019 movie and touches on the shadow, persona, Codependent Narcissism (One-Down Narcissism), and some broader societal issues. Join David Tian on the “DTPHD Podcast” as we explore deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. Join our private Facebook group here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ NOTE: This the amended version of the video, which originally had synching issues.  ***** For over a decade, David Tian, Ph.D., has helped hundreds of thousands of people from over 87 countries find happiness, success, and fulfillment in their social, professional, and love lives. His presentations - whether keynotes, seminars, or workshops - leave clients with insights into their behavior, psychology, and keys to their empowerment. His training methodologies are the result of over a decade of coaching, therapy, and education of thousands of students around the world. Join him on the “DTPHD Podcast” as he explores deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. Subscribe now. Connect with David Tian here: Website: https://www.davidtianphd.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/davidtianphd DTPHD Podcast Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ Man Up Show Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/manupcommunity/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/TheAuraUniversity Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/davidtianphd/ Podcast: https://www.davidtianphd.com/dtphdpodcast Medium: https://medium.com/@davidtian Twitter: https://twitter.com/davidtianphd ***** Show Notes: 2:26 Jungian archetypes in the Joker movie 7:09 What is pseudobulbar affect, and what's up with his laughing fits? 12:38 The scene that illustrates Arthur Fleck's main coping strategies 16:53 The similarities and differences between the Joker and the American Psycho character 22:16 The clinical definition of narcissistic personality disorder 26:57 What narcissists are capable of 31:21 How the Joker/Arthur Fleck wants to be treated 36:49 What do codependent narcissists have in common with standard narcissists? 41:54 The idealization and devaluation phases of the Arthur Fleck 47:47 Is Arthur Fleck as bad as the other people in the movie? 53:05 Understanding the quote that the Arthur Fleck kept repeating 59:19 How the Joker/Arthur Fleck views his situation from the inside For transcriptions and more free resources, go here: https://www.davidtianphd.com/podcast/joker-movie-analysis/

***** In this talk in February 2019 in San Diego -- originally entitled, "The Hidden Power of Recovery for Life & Love" -- I reveal how the underlying insecurities behind our core neediness are the same ones that lead not only to well-known addictions like alcohol, sex, and drug addiction, but also to more socially acceptable addictions like money, fame, social validation, show-off experiences and things, narcissistic ego supply, etc. The same pathway that has left many men unsuccessful with women, dating, relationships, and life overall... is the same thing that the famous 12-step groups seek to heal and grow. This talk draws inspiration from Russell Brand's excellent book "Recovery: Freedom from Our Addictions." ***** For over a decade, David Tian, Ph.D., has helped hundreds of thousands of people from over 87 countries find happiness, success, and fulfillment in their social, professional, and love lives. His presentations - whether keynotes, seminars, or workshops - leave clients with insights into their behavior, psychology, and keys to their empowerment. His training methodologies are the result of over a decade of coaching, therapy, and education of thousands of students around the world. Join him on the “DTPHD Podcast” as he explores deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. Subscribe now. Connect with David Tian here: Website: https://www.davidtianphd.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/davidtianphd DTPHD Podcast Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ Man Up Show Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/manupcommunity/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/TheAuraUniversity Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/davidtianphd/ Podcast: https://www.davidtianphd.com/dtphdpodcast Medium: https://medium.com/@davidtian Twitter: https://twitter.com/davidtianphd ***** You're Probably A Bit F**k'ed (So Was I) & Here's What To Do About It: The Hidden Power of Recovery Shownotes 0:11 Why should you care about addiction research? 6:28 How effective is the 12-step program to transformation? 10:35 Why would you need the 12-step program in your life? 15:02 Is addictive behavior a coping strategy? 20:37 Step 1: Are you a bit fucked? 24:19 How addiction starts 30:51 Step 2: Could you not be fucked? 34:31 How to encounter the the positive intents of the various parts of you 41:01 Step 3: Are you, on your own, going to ‘unfuck' yourself? 46:40 How to replace a bad habit with a new habit 51:01 Why would you want to be free from the “cult of not enough”? 56:12 What therapy helps you find 1:01:18 Step 4: Write down all the things that are fucking you up or have ever fucked you up and don't lie or leave anything out. 1:05:57 Step 5: Honestly, tell someone trustworthy about how fucked you are. 1:09:50 Step 6: Well, that's revealed a lot of fucked up patterns. Do you want to stop it? Seriously? 1:12:35 Step 7: Are you willing to live in a new way that's not all about you and your previous fucked up stuff? You have to. 1:17:26 Step 8: Prepare to apologize to everyone for everything affected by your being so fucked up. 1:21:15 Step 9: Now apologize. Unless that would make things worse. 1:25:43 Step 10: Watch out for fucked up thinking and behavior, and be honest when it happens. 1:30:52 How to discover your True Self 1:37:57 Step 11: Stay connected to your new perspective. 1:42:52 Why we end up in addictive cycles 1:47:43 This is a necessary part of your personal transformation 1:55:10 Step 12: Look at life less selfishly, be nice to everyone, help people if you can. 2:00:38 The prerequisite of being in Flow For transcriptions and more free resources, go here: https://www.davidtianphd.com/psychology/hidden-power-recovery/

***** "Good vs. Evil, Light vs. Dark Triad: The Evolution of Morality" was part of a full-day seminar I gave at the Intercontinental Resort Bali on 1 June 2019. In this keynote talk to a group of private coaching clients, I give my personal perspective on the age-old question of "Why be moral?" informed by evolutionary psychology, Asian and Western philosophy, clinical psychology, and life experience. The talk begins with an examination of the Light Triad scale proposed by Scott Barry Kaufman as a counterpoint to the Dark Triad. I then argue that we experience the most enjoyable and meaningful benefits of life in direct proportion to our moral goodness and in inverse proportion to the extent of our Dark Triad traits. ***** For over a decade, David Tian, Ph.D., has helped hundreds of thousands of people from over 87 countries find happiness, success, and fulfillment in their social, professional, and love lives. His presentations - whether keynotes, seminars, or workshops - leave clients with insights into their behavior, psychology, and keys to their empowerment. His training methodologies are the result of over a decade of coaching, therapy, and education of thousands of students around the world. Join him on the “DTPHD Podcast” as he explores deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. Subscribe now. Connect with David Tian here: Website: https://www.davidtianphd.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/davidtianphd DTPHD Podcast Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ Man Up Show Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/manupcommunity/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/TheAuraUniversity Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/davidtianphd/ Podcast: https://www.davidtianphd.com/dtphdpodcast Medium: https://medium.com/@davidtian Twitter: https://twitter.com/davidtianphd ***** Good v. Evil, Light v. Dark Triad, PUAs & Red Pill: Morality in the Survival of the Fittest Shownotes 0:06 Introduction to the Dark Triad 5:04 Is relativism the enemy of morality? 11:09 What is moral relativism? 17:05 What's good? What's evil? 23:08 How the “death of God” is related to the survival of the fittest 28:55 Does significance and achievement make you better? 34:21 How to ground ethics properly 39:10 Why should we be good? 43:14 This is responsible for the popularization of moral relativism 48:22 Why a lot of men like the Dark Triad 53:52 If you have these traits, you won't trust other people 58:32 The desirable positive measures that Dark Triad types don't get to experience 1:03:08 What makes life worth living 1:08:13 What leads to happiness? 1:14:10 How to solve your deeper problems 1:18:46 What happens when there's no objective morality? 1:22:26 This happens when you pursue goodness 1:27:03 Is human nature good or bad? 1:30:50 Is there a connection between goodness and happiness? For transcriptions and more free resources, go here: https://www.davidtianphd.com/happiness/morality-survival-fittest/

***** Join David Tian on the “DTPHD Podcast” as we explore deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. Join our private Facebook group here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ NOTE: This the amended version of the video, which originally had synching issues.  ***** For over a decade, David Tian, Ph.D., has helped hundreds of thousands of people from over 87 countries find happiness, success, and fulfillment in their social, professional, and love lives. His presentations - whether keynotes, seminars, or workshops - leave clients with insights into their behavior, psychology, and keys to their empowerment. His training methodologies are the result of over a decade of coaching, therapy, and education of thousands of students around the world. Join him on the “DTPHD Podcast” as he explores deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. Subscribe now. Connect with David Tian here: Website: https://www.davidtianphd.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/davidtianphd DTPHD Podcast Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ Man Up Show Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/manupcommunity/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/TheAuraUniversity Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/davidtianphd/ Podcast: https://www.davidtianphd.com/dtphdpodcast Medium: https://medium.com/@davidtian Twitter: https://twitter.com/davidtianphd ***** HENRY CHONG is our special guest speaker on this episode. Henry is Director of Fusang Capital, a fund management company that manages the assets of multi-family offices. He is also a Director at the Portcullis Group, Asia's biggest independent group of trust companies, providing comprehensive wealth administration to high-net-worth individuals, providing a one-stop shop for corporate, trustee, and fund administration services to individuals, family offices, philanthropies, private banks, and investment managers. Henry is a graduate of Oxford University with a B.A. (Hons) in Philosophy Politics & Economics and is a founder of the Oxford Economics Society. He also holds a M.Sc. in Behavioral Science from the London School of Economics and is a Fellow of the Royal Society of Arts (FRSC). He will be sharing with us from his deep insights in behavioral economics, finance, health, and psychology. Connect with Henry here: http://henrychong.com/http://henrychong.com/ ***** Show Notes: 6:56 How to trick your brain into doing things 10:10 How succeeding in your fitness goals can teach you a lot about life 15:31 The underlying reasons we avoid doing what we know we should 18:20 How to get started on starting! 22:00 How to apply these principles in dating 27:20 Why we are afraid of failing 30:43 How to overcome failures 34:33 How to make your tasks more manageable 38:40 The best way to approach complex tasks 42:45 Why you should be more decisive 47:00 The type of people who get a lot of things done in a short amount of time 52:01 Should you aim higher? Should you say yes to more responsibilities? The right response may surprise you For transcriptions and more free resources, go here: https://www.davidtianphd.com/podcast/take-action/

***** "Values, Virtues, Vice, and Dating" is part of a full-day seminar I gave at the Le Meridien Bangkok on 8 December 2018. In this keynote talk to a group of private coaching clients, I reveal how morality is the missing piece in the puzzle of dating, mating, love, happiness, and life overall. I also propose a virtue ethical approach to life and values, informed by a deeper understanding of moral philosophy from both eastern and western traditions. And I argue that we evolved a moral sense as an adaptive mechanism for forming smarter, more efficient, more trustworthy alliances. The moral sense is also adaptive because it allows us to raise happier families, resulting in healthier and happier offspring. Show notes and transcription will be here: https://www.davidtianphd.com/happiness/values-virtues-vice-dating/ ***** For over a decade, David Tian, Ph.D., has helped hundreds of thousands of people from over 87 countries find happiness, success, and fulfillment in their social, professional, and love lives. His presentations - whether keynotes, seminars, or workshops - leave clients with insights into their behavior, psychology, and keys to their empowerment. His training methodologies are the result of over a decade of coaching, therapy, and education of thousands of students around the world. Join him on the “DTPHD Podcast” as he explores deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. Subscribe now. Connect with David Tian here: Website: https://www.davidtianphd.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/davidtianphd DTPHD Podcast Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ Man Up Show Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/manupcommunity/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/TheAuraUniversity Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/davidtianphd/ Podcast: https://www.davidtianphd.com/dtphdpodcast Medium: https://medium.com/@davidtian Twitter: https://twitter.com/davidtianphd ***** Values, Virtues, Vice, and Dating: Ethics as the Missing Link to Love, Happiness, & the Good Life Show Notes 1:01 Why having your own set of values is important 6:26 This is what's wrong with the MGTOW, Red Pills, and Incels 10:53 Characteristics of a narcissist 16:50 This is why many millennials are screwed 21:31 What does emotional freedom feels like? 26:53 The human being's evolutionary advantage 34:11 The sin that overshadows all other deadly sins 44:03 What psychopaths are like when in relationships 50:00 The four cardinal virtues and why they matter 56:22 An introduction to the Confucian virtues 1:00:59 The crucial difference between knowledge and practice 1:05:18 How one can become evil without even realizing it 1:11:32 How artifice and the artificial can be good 1:16:25 This is how you become a better person 1:19:50 Understanding moral connoisseurship 1:25:11 How you develop connoisseurship 1:29:48 Why should you be good? 1:36:01 Why being virtuous is also good from an evolutionary perspective 1:39:45 What makes your life meaningful For transcriptions and more free resources, go here: https://www.davidtianphd.com/happiness/values-virtues-vice-dating/

***** Join David Tian on the “DTPHD Podcast” as we explore deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. Join our private Facebook group here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ ***** For over a decade, David Tian, Ph.D., has helped hundreds of thousands of people from over 87 countries find happiness, success, and fulfillment in their social, professional, and love lives. His presentations - whether keynotes, seminars, or workshops - leave clients with insights into their behavior, psychology, and keys to their empowerment. His training methodologies are the result of over a decade of coaching, therapy, and education of thousands of students around the world. Join him on the “DTPHD Podcast” as he explores deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. Subscribe now. Connect with David Tian here: Website: https://www.davidtianphd.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/davidtianphd DTPHD Podcast Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ Man Up Show Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/manupcommunity/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/TheAuraUniversity Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/davidtianphd/ Podcast: https://www.davidtianphd.com/dtphdpodcast Medium: https://medium.com/@davidtian Twitter: https://twitter.com/davidtianphd ***** Stefan Ravalli bio: Forever studying masterful humans and the art of service the world over to bring their practices to our (sometimes “service-deficient”) culture, Stefan Ravalli combines all that with his expertise in meditation, mindfulness, and communication/listening to raise the game of service professionals - and anyone looking to upgrade how they connect with others (and themselves). Learning meditation was a game-changer for Stefan. It gave him the inner strength to be his unique self (without the negative self-talk!), connect with others better, and live a healthy happy life. Meditation also makes you realize your potential and gives you the fearlessness to pursue bigger and better things you never thought possible, so Stefan left a leadership role at a high-profile bar/restaurant to India to teach meditation. After doing that for years and deepening his tea ceremony practice, Stefan realized that the art of service was the richest path of self-cultivation available to him. Serving anything anywhere was the best way to apply and accelerate all the upgrades he got from meditation. So he started Serve Conscious to bring these tools and practices to anyone where service is part of their life - to awaken us to the power of service as a means of growth and self-mastery. Learn more about Stefan Ravalli here: http://serveconscious.com ***** Show Notes: For transcriptions and more free resources, go here: 3:06 Why is the concept of hypocrisy actually profound? 7:06 Is hypocrisy based in toxic shame? 12:35 What our normal reactions to hypocrisy say about us 16:35 Can you separate the teacher from his teachings? 21:42 What makes you a true hypocrite? 24:55 This happens when you really try to understand people you disagree with 27:56 What happens when you blame others for the emotions that you feel 30:41 What you should do when you find yourself frequently triggered For transcriptions and more free resources, go here: https://www.davidtianphd.com/podcast/enlightened-hypocrisy/

***** So many of us are afraid that if we stop beating ourselves up, forcing ourselves to strive and achieve… that we'll then just end up being lazy bums. And some of us are so afraid of failing that we don't even try, we just procrastinate forever… because we fear that if we fail, it would *prove* that we're not worthy. But, what if you were to stop all striving, all working so hard to gain what you already have, how would your life be different? In all of your searching, in all of your striving, in all of your gaining, you are simply uncovering what has been here all along, my achiever friend. It's time to remember now… that all the worth you are filling your days trying to have confirmed, trying to earn… is here, in this moment, in you… from the moment you took your very first breath. It's time to remember now that you, my fellow human being, were born worthy… worthy of connection, of significance, of love. ***** This is inspired by Sarah Blondin's meditations. Do yourself a favor and check out her work: https://www.sarahblondin.com/ ***** For over a decade, David Tian, Ph.D., has helped hundreds of thousands of people from over 87 countries find happiness, success, and fulfillment in their social, professional, and love lives. His presentations - whether keynotes, seminars, or workshops - leave clients with insights into their behavior, psychology, and keys to their empowerment. His training methodologies are the result of over a decade of coaching, therapy, and education of thousands of students around the world. Join him on the “DTPHD Podcast” as he explores deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. Subscribe now. Connect with David Tian here: Website: https://www.davidtianphd.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/davidtianphd DTPHD Podcast Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ Man Up Show Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/manupcommunity/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/TheAuraUniversity Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/davidtianphd/ Podcast: https://www.davidtianphd.com/dtphdpodcast Medium: https://medium.com/@davidtian Twitter: https://twitter.com/davidtianphd ***** For transcriptions and more free resources, go here: https://www.davidtianphd.com/psychology/you-are-enough/

***** Join David Tian on the “DTPHD Podcast” as we explore deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. Join our private Facebook group here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ ***** For over a decade, David Tian, Ph.D., has helped hundreds of thousands of people from over 87 countries find happiness, success, and fulfillment in their social, professional, and love lives. His presentations - whether keynotes, seminars, or workshops - leave clients with insights into their behavior, psychology, and keys to their empowerment. His training methodologies are the result of over a decade of coaching, therapy, and education of thousands of students around the world. Join him on the “DTPHD Podcast” as he explores deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. Subscribe now. Connect with David Tian here: Website: https://www.davidtianphd.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/davidtianphd DTPHD Podcast Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ Man Up Show Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/manupcommunity/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/TheAuraUniversity Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/davidtianphd/ Podcast: https://www.davidtianphd.com/dtphdpodcast Medium: https://medium.com/@davidtian Twitter: https://twitter.com/davidtianphd ***** HENRY CHONG is our special guest speaker on this episode. Henry is Director of Fusang Capital, a fund management company that manages the assets of multi-family offices. He is also a Director at the Portcullis Group, Asia's biggest independent group of trust companies, providing comprehensive wealth administration to high-net-worth individuals, providing a one-stop shop for corporate, trustee, and fund administration services to individuals, family offices, philanthropies, private banks, and investment managers. Henry is a graduate of Oxford University with a B.A. (Hons) in Philosophy Politics & Economics and is a founder of the Oxford Economics Society. He also holds a M.Sc. in Behavioral Science from the London School of Economics and is a Fellow of the Royal Society of Arts (FRSC). He will be sharing with us from his deep insights in behavioral economics, finance, health, and psychology. Connect with Henry here: http://henrychong.com/http://henrychong.com/ ***** Show Notes: 2:27 What is a heuristic? 5:59 This is how to apply heuristics in life 11:15 How decisions are made in high pressure environments 15:37 Are we unconsciously using heuristics in our daily lives? 18:55 Where do we do better — algorithmic or heuristic thinking? 22:47 Understanding heuristics through the modern portfolio theory 27:58 Are all decisions emotionally driven? 30:00 How our brains operate in decision-making 33:35 This is how heuristics can be extremely useful 36:56 Relating the paradox of Buridan's ass to our emotions 42:18 One of the most powerful heuristics 44:17 How artificial intelligence relates to heuristics For transcriptions and more free resources, go here: https://www.davidtianphd.com/podcast/smarter-heuristics/

***** Join David Tian on the “DTPHD Podcast” as we explore deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. For the show notes, go here: https://www.davidtianphd.com/podcast/mindfulness-or-mantra-meditation/ Join our private Facebook group here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ ***** For over a decade, David Tian, Ph.D., has helped hundreds of thousands of people from over 87 countries find happiness, success, and fulfillment in their social, professional, and love lives. His presentations - whether keynotes, seminars, or workshops - leave clients with insights into their behavior, psychology, and keys to their empowerment. His training methodologies are the result of over a decade of coaching, therapy, and education of thousands of students around the world. Join him on the “DTPHD Podcast” as he explores deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. Subscribe now. Connect with David Tian here: Website: https://www.davidtianphd.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/davidtianphd DTPHD Podcast Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ Man Up Show Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/manupcommunity/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/TheAuraUniversity Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/davidtianphd/ Podcast: https://www.davidtianphd.com/dtphdpodcast Medium: https://medium.com/@davidtian Twitter: https://twitter.com/davidtianphd ***** Stefan Ravalli bio: Forever studying masterful humans and the art of service the world over to bring their practices to our (sometimes “service-deficient”) culture, Stefan Ravalli combines all that with his expertise in meditation, mindfulness, and communication/listening to raise the game of service professionals - and anyone looking to upgrade how they connect with others (and themselves). Learning meditation was a game-changer for Stefan. It gave him the inner strength to be his unique self (without the negative self-talk!), connect with others better, and live a healthy happy life. Meditation also makes you realize your potential and gives you the fearlessness to pursue bigger and better things you never thought possible, so Stefan left a leadership role at a high-profile bar/restaurant to India to teach meditation. After doing that for years and deepening his tea ceremony practice, Stefan realized that the art of service was the richest path of self-cultivation available to him. Serving anything anywhere was the best way to apply and accelerate all the upgrades he got from meditation. So he started Serve Conscious to bring these tools and practices to anyone where service is part of their life - to awaken us to the power of service as a means of growth and self-mastery. Learn more about Stefan Ravalli here: http://serveconscious.com ***** Show Notes: 2:53 Is meditation related to the other aspects of our lives? 6:00 Differentiating mindfulness from meditation 9:50 What is a meditation practice? 13:33 Mindless versus mindfulness 17:41 David shares his mindfulness meditation experience 19:38 The benefits of mindfulness and mantra meditation 23:04 Introducing transcendental meditation 27:12 What true awareness should be like 31:22 Mindfulness and Gary Vaynerchuck's dichotomy of clouds and dirt 34:14 Delving into ascendant and descendant philosophies 38:28 Reflecting on what makes life meaningful for you 42:14 Summing up what mindfulness really is For transcriptions and more free resources, go here:

***** Join David Tian on the “DTPHD Podcast” as we explore deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. Join our private Facebook group here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ ***** For over a decade, David Tian, Ph.D., has helped hundreds of thousands of people from over 87 countries find happiness, success, and fulfillment in their social, professional, and love lives. His presentations - whether keynotes, seminars, or workshops - leave clients with insights into their behavior, psychology, and keys to their empowerment. His training methodologies are the result of over a decade of coaching, therapy, and education of thousands of students around the world. Join him on the “DTPHD Podcast” as he explores deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. Subscribe now. Connect with David Tian here: Website: https://www.davidtianphd.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/davidtianphd DTPHD Podcast Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ Man Up Show Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/manupcommunity/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/TheAuraUniversity Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/davidtianphd/ Podcast: https://www.davidtianphd.com/dtphdpodcast Medium: https://medium.com/@davidtian Twitter: https://twitter.com/davidtianphd ***** HENRY CHONG is our special guest speaker on this episode. Henry is Director of Fusang Capital, a fund management company that manages the assets of multi-family offices. He is also a Director at the Portcullis Group, Asia's biggest independent group of trust companies, providing comprehensive wealth administration to high-net-worth individuals, providing a one-stop shop for corporate, trustee, and fund administration services to individuals, family offices, philanthropies, private banks, and investment managers. Henry is a graduate of Oxford University with a B.A. (Hons) in Philosophy Politics & Economics and is a founder of the Oxford Economics Society. He also holds a M.Sc. in Behavioral Science from the London School of Economics and is a Fellow of the Royal Society of Arts (FRSC). He will be sharing with us from his deep insights in behavioral economics, finance, health, and psychology. Connect with Henry here: http://henrychong.com/http://henrychong.com/ ***** Show Notes: 02:29 This is what antifragility is 05:38 When does the Black Swan come into being? 09:28 What it means to grow out of chaos 14:00 Understanding Hemingway's quote on the world breaking everyone 18:54 Is life antifragile? 24:20 The opposite of embracing chaos 28:05 Defining risk and uncertainty 33:40 The dumbbell approach to life 36:52 How to develop antifragility 39:26 How to survive the worst case scenario 47:34 This happens when you don't take risks 50:32 Two principles you should go by in life For transcriptions and more free resources, go here: https://www.davidtianphd.com/podcast/you-should-be-antifragile/

***** This 80-year Harvard study found the key to happiness… …isn't in more money or luxuries… or in being popular or high status… or in how physically fit or healthy or intelligent you are. Rather, the most important factor for a happy life is… Watch this video for the answer! It's so easy to get caught up in things that aren't meaningful. I hope this video reminds people of the one thing that truly matters. I'm also proud to share with you my free relationships Masterclass. Click the link to access: https://www.davidtianphd.com/quiz ***** For over a decade, David Tian, Ph.D., has helped hundreds of thousands of people from over 87 countries find happiness, success, and fulfillment in their social, professional, and love lives. His presentations - whether keynotes, seminars, or workshops - leave clients with insights into their behavior, psychology, and keys to their empowerment. His training methodologies are the result of over a decade of coaching, therapy, and education of thousands of students around the world. Join him on the “DTPHD Podcast” as he explores deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. Subscribe now. Connect with David Tian here: Website: https://www.davidtianphd.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/davidtianphd DTPHD Podcast Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ Man Up Show Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/manupcommunity/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/TheAuraUniversity Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/davidtianphd/ Podcast: https://www.davidtianphd.com/dtphdpodcast Medium: https://medium.com/@davidtian Twitter: https://twitter.com/davidtianphd ***** For transcriptions and more free resources, go here: https://www.davidtianphd.com/happiness/secret-to-happiness/

***** Join David Tian on the “DTPHD Podcast” as we explore deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. Join our private Facebook group here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ (This video experienced technical issues during recording.) ***** For over a decade, David Tian, Ph.D., has helped hundreds of thousands of people from over 87 countries find happiness, success, and fulfillment in their social, professional, and love lives. His presentations - whether keynotes, seminars, or workshops - leave clients with insights into their behavior, psychology, and keys to their empowerment. His training methodologies are the result of over a decade of coaching, therapy, and education of thousands of students around the world. Join him on the “DTPHD Podcast” as he explores deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. Subscribe now. Connect with David Tian here: Website: https://www.davidtianphd.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/davidtianphd DTPHD Podcast Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ Man Up Show Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/manupcommunity/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/TheAuraUniversity Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/davidtianphd/ Podcast: https://www.davidtianphd.com/dtphdpodcast Medium: https://medium.com/@davidtian Twitter: https://twitter.com/davidtianphd ***** HENRY CHONG is our special guest speaker on this episode. Henry is Director of Fusang Capital, a fund management company that manages the assets of multi-family offices. He is also a Director at the Portcullis Group, Asia's biggest independent group of trust companies, providing comprehensive wealth administration to high-net-worth individuals, providing a one-stop shop for corporate, trustee, and fund administration services to individuals, family offices, philanthropies, private banks, and investment managers. Henry is a graduate of Oxford University with a B.A. (Hons) in Philosophy Politics & Economics and is a founder of the Oxford Economics Society. He also holds a M.Sc. in Behavioral Science from the London School of Economics and is a Fellow of the Royal Society of Arts (FRSC). He will be sharing with us from his deep insights in behavioral economics, finance, health, and psychology. Connect with Henry here: http://henrychong.com/http://henrychong.com/ ***** Show Notes: 1:40 What is the vantage point of trust? 5:08 How is failure the way through success? 9:22 What is a positive delusion and why does it matter? 14:30 This surprising thing happens when you are focused on failing 17:15 What makes our beliefs strong? 19:18 When a delusion helps you achieve your goal 25:22 David Tian shares personal events in his life involving the vantage point of trust 30:31 What is real belief as opposed to mere opinion? 35:30 Can challenges be motivation for action? 39:13 When imperfections become an advantage 44:16 What charismatic people have in common 49:27 Do our past mistakes have a purpose in our life? For transcriptions and more free resources, go here: https://www.davidtianphd.com/podcast/vantage-point-of-trust/

***** Join David Tian on the “DTPHD Podcast” as we explore deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. For the show notes, go here: https://www.davidtianphd.com/podcast/what-limits-your-development/ Join our private Facebook group here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ (This video experienced technical issues during recording.) ***** For over a decade, David Tian, Ph.D., has helped hundreds of thousands of people from over 87 countries find happiness, success, and fulfillment in their social, professional, and love lives. His presentations - whether keynotes, seminars, or workshops - leave clients with insights into their behavior, psychology, and keys to their empowerment. His training methodologies are the result of over a decade of coaching, therapy, and education of thousands of students around the world. Join him on the “DTPHD Podcast” as he explores deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. Subscribe now. Connect with David Tian here: Website: https://www.davidtianphd.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/davidtianphd DTPHD Podcast Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ Man Up Show Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/manupcommunity/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/TheAuraUniversity Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/davidtianphd/ Podcast: https://www.davidtianphd.com/dtphdpodcast Medium: https://medium.com/@davidtian Twitter: https://twitter.com/davidtianphd ***** HENRY CHONG is our special guest speaker on this episode. Henry is Director of Fusang Capital, a fund management company that manages the assets of multi-family offices. He is also a Director at the Portcullis Group, Asia's biggest independent group of trust companies, providing comprehensive wealth administration to high-net-worth individuals, providing a one-stop shop for corporate, trustee, and fund administration services to individuals, family offices, philanthropies, private banks, and investment managers. Henry is a graduate of Oxford University with a B.A. (Hons) in Philosophy Politics & Economics and is a founder of the Oxford Economics Society. He also holds a M.Sc. in Behavioral Science from the London School of Economics and is a Fellow of the Royal Society of Arts (FRSC). He will be sharing with us from his deep insights in behavioral economics, finance, health, and psychology. Connect with Henry here: http://henrychong.com/http://henrychong.com/ ***** The link Henry referred to is here: http://www.eugenewei.com/blog/2018/5/21/invisible-asymptotes ***** Show Notes: 0:45 Why are invisible asymptotes important? 5:24 The smart way to approach your limitations 9:03 How can invisible asymptotes make a big difference in our personal lives? 14:07 How do you know where the asymptote is if it's invisible? 18:08 How to find your personal limitations the right way 22:29 What to do if you haven't found what you're good at yet 26:55 David shares how he overcame the invisible asymptotes in his life 32:03 What to do when you hit your limitations 37:11 How can you turn your disadvantages into advantages? 40:16 Why should we think with the end in mind? 43:49 How focusing on just one thing can make or break you For transcriptions and more free resources, go here: https://www.davidtianphd.com/podcast/what-limits-your-development/

***** You can find Parts 2-4 of this series in the "Secret for a Successful Relationship" FREE Masterclass available here: https://www.davidtianphd.com/masterclass Most of the world has idealized "love" as the solution to all life's problems, but their lives are still messed up because they lack a clear, realistic, and accurate understanding of what "love" actually is, where it comes from, and what it does. This is the first part in a multi-part series called, "The Secret for a Successful Relationship." For complimentary access to the rest of the video series, click here and register: https://www.davidtianphd.com/masterclass/ ***** For over a decade, David Tian, Ph.D., has helped hundreds of thousands of people from over 87 countries find happiness, success, and fulfillment in their social, professional, and love lives. His presentations - whether keynotes, seminars, or workshops - leave clients with insights into their behavior, psychology, and keys to their empowerment. His training methodologies are the result of over a decade of coaching, therapy, and education of thousands of students around the world. Join him on the “DTPHD Podcast” as he explores deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. Subscribe now. Connect with David Tian here: Website: https://www.davidtianphd.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/davidtianphd DTPHD Podcast Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ Man Up Show Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/manupcommunity/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/TheAuraUniversity Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/davidtianphd/ Podcast: https://www.davidtianphd.com/dtphdpodcast Medium: https://medium.com/@davidtian Twitter: https://twitter.com/davidtianphd ***** ***** David Tian Ph.D.: The rationale or the reason and — or the context for this talk is out of my own life, as is all of my lessons come out of my own life. So, you might have also experienced these challenges, where you have chemistry with somebody, you fall in love, or you get along well enough that you'd want to see them again, and then again, and again, and again, and soon enough you're seeing them on a regular basis. And you're doing couple things and then that turns into one year, two year, three year thing. And it wasn't really even a conscious decision for many guys as it wasn't for me to get into a relationship. You're just having fun, casually dating, and then next thing you know, you like certain girls in particular, or guys if you are a girl, and you start to hone in on one or two individuals. And if you're mature, or if you're like a cool adult in the modern world, you never really have that talk of like, “Are we girlfriend, boyfriend now?” That's often the weaker party begging for reassurance at that point. So you're probably the dominant one like, “Yeah, no problem. Yeah, let's just hang out.” For transcriptions and more free resources, go here: https://www.davidtianphd.com/relationships/passionate-love-becomes-toxic/

***** "Practical Psychology for Extraordinary Living" is a special seminar series continuing the themes explored in the "Modern Mating Explained" video series, exploring the practical implications of deeper reflection on psychology for the art of living. ***** For over a decade, David Tian, Ph.D., has helped hundreds of thousands of people from over 87 countries find happiness, success, and fulfillment in their social, professional, and love lives. His presentations - whether keynotes, seminars, or workshops - leave clients with insights into their behavior, psychology, and keys to their empowerment. His training methodologies are the result of over a decade of coaching, therapy, and education of thousands of students around the world. Join him on the “DTPHD Podcast” as he explores deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. Subscribe now. Connect with David Tian here: Website: https://www.davidtianphd.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/davidtianphd DTPHD Podcast Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ Man Up Show Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/manupcommunity/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/TheAuraUniversity Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/davidtianphd/ Podcast: https://www.davidtianphd.com/dtphdpodcast Medium: https://medium.com/@davidtian Twitter: https://twitter.com/davidtianphd ***** David Tian Ph.D.: Welcome to the final part of this series, Practical Psychology for Extraordinary Living. This is probably part four, this is the second half of the true self section. And I was planning to do this entire true self section at one go at the live seminar, but we only got halfway through and ran out of time. So since then, we've been working on a lot of other projects and I apologize for getting this out so late, but here we go. This is the second half of the true self section. And in the first half, which you should watch if you haven't already, PPL number three — this should be number four — we covered the three categories of our parts. We covered the basic idea of the true self and the concept of the self as a collection or a conglomeration of loosely held parts. And we went over — I introduced the main types of parts. The exile parts, the managerial parts and the firefighter parts. And then I went over one of the foundational assumptions of — And I also introduced internal family systems therapy, which is what this is drawing from, IFS therapy. And one of the guiding assumptions of IFS is that every part has positive intent. I believe that this is true for everyone who's not a psychopath. Psychopath's, just bracket that for now. For transcriptions and more free resources, go here: https://www.davidtianphd.com/psychology/true-self-inner-critic/

***** Join David Tian on the “DTPHD Podcast” as we explore deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. For the show notes, go here: https://www.davidtianphd.com/podcast/the-key-to-focus/ Join our private Facebook group here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ (This video experienced technical issues during recording.) ***** For over a decade, David Tian, Ph.D., has helped hundreds of thousands of people from over 87 countries find happiness, success, and fulfillment in their social, professional, and love lives. His presentations - whether keynotes, seminars, or workshops - leave clients with insights into their behavior, psychology, and keys to their empowerment. His training methodologies are the result of over a decade of coaching, therapy, and education of thousands of students around the world. Join him on the “DTPHD Podcast” as he explores deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. Subscribe now. Connect with David Tian here: Website: https://www.davidtianphd.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/davidtianphd DTPHD Podcast Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ Man Up Show Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/manupcommunity/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/TheAuraUniversity Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/davidtianphd/ Podcast: https://www.davidtianphd.com/dtphdpodcast Medium: https://medium.com/@davidtian Twitter: https://twitter.com/davidtianphd ***** HENRY CHONG is our special guest speaker on this episode. Henry is Director of Fusang Capital, a fund management company that manages the assets of multi-family offices. He is also a Director at the Portcullis Group, Asia's biggest independent group of trust companies, providing comprehensive wealth administration to high-net-worth individuals, providing a one-stop shop for corporate, trustee, and fund administration services to individuals, family offices, philanthropies, private banks, and investment managers. Henry is a graduate of Oxford University with a B.A. (Hons) in Philosophy Politics & Economics and is a founder of the Oxford Economics Society. He also holds a M.Sc. in Behavioral Science from the London School of Economics and is a Fellow of the Royal Society of Arts (FRSC). He will be sharing with us from his deep insights in behavioral economics, finance, health, and psychology. Connect with Henry here: http://henrychong.com/http://henrychong.com/ ***** Show Notes: Episode 14 Show Notes 00:57: The importance of asking questions in gaining focus 06:01: How to decide what to focus on 08:19: Why you need a primary goal in life 11:46: Action you need to arrive at your focus question 16:28: What happens when you have new goals or you enter a new phase in life 20:49: Why you need to understand the deeper motivations and reasons for achieving your goals 22:40: The significance of visualizing your end goal 28:34: Do you need to be really good at one thing? 34:02: Is it essential to have a support group for your goals? For transcriptions and more free resources, go here: https://www.davidtianphd.com/podcast/the-key-to-focus/

***** I learned this important life lesson from Star Trek :P ... If you want lasting fulfillment in life, choose goodness and truth over pleasure. Choose the truth and the good over feelings. ***** For over a decade, David Tian, Ph.D., has helped hundreds of thousands of people from over 87 countries find happiness, success, and fulfillment in their social, professional, and love lives. His presentations - whether keynotes, seminars, or workshops - leave clients with insights into their behavior, psychology, and keys to their empowerment. His training methodologies are the result of over a decade of coaching, therapy, and education of thousands of students around the world. Join him on the “DTPHD Podcast” as he explores deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. Subscribe now. Connect with David Tian here: Website: https://www.davidtianphd.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/davidtianphd DTPHD Podcast Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ Man Up Show Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/manupcommunity/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/TheAuraUniversity Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/davidtianphd/ Podcast: https://www.davidtianphd.com/dtphdpodcast Medium: https://medium.com/@davidtian Twitter: https://twitter.com/davidtianphd ***** For transcriptions and more free resources, go here: https://www.davidtianphd.com/psychology/goodness-over-pleasure/

***** Study good character. Decide which character traits are most important to you. Learn the signs of good character. And study harder to learn how manipulative people mimic these traits when they don't actually possess them. Discern clearly and without apology. Recognise your own immaturity. Actively work to heal, grow, and mature. But never let your partner convince you to consider your own personal flaws as a valid reason to overlook theirs. Detect, protect, and celebrate people of good character, for they are exceedingly rare. Discern, reject, and shun those of low character for they are vampires, predators, or parasites… driven by consumption, who will devour their victims. Above all, know that a person of character and a person of horrible morals are often indistinguishable at first glance. Only the wise and mature among us, who are committed to attaining the experience and knowledge to discern one from the other… stands a chance of reaching his or her full potential, lasting happiness, and true fulfillment. ***** For over a decade, David Tian, Ph.D., has helped hundreds of thousands of people from over 87 countries find happiness, success, and fulfillment in their social, professional, and love lives. His presentations - whether keynotes, seminars, or workshops - leave clients with insights into their behavior, psychology, and keys to their empowerment. His training methodologies are the result of over a decade of coaching, therapy, and education of thousands of students around the world. Join him on the “DTPHD Podcast” as he explores deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. Subscribe now. Connect with David Tian here: Website: https://www.davidtianphd.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/davidtianphd DTPHD Podcast Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ Man Up Show Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/manupcommunity/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/TheAuraUniversity Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/davidtianphd/ Podcast: https://www.davidtianphd.com/dtphdpodcast Medium: https://medium.com/@davidtian Twitter: https://twitter.com/davidtianphd ***** For transcriptions and more free resources, go here: https://www.davidtianphd.com/life-decisions/seek-good-character/

***** For most of my adult life, I valued freedom and autonomy above all else. But as I matured, I discovered something even more important was missing... Love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact, you must give it to no one. Ultimate freedom entails freedom from attachments, anything that could tie you down and make you vulnerable to hurt or sadness. Think of the image of a self-reliant man in the wilderness, independent, autonomous, free. But in that wilderness, your heart — safe, dark, motionless, airless — it will change. It will not be broken; but it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. To love at all is to be vulnerable. ***** For over a decade, David Tian, Ph.D., has helped hundreds of thousands of people from over 87 countries find happiness, success, and fulfillment in their social, professional, and love lives. His presentations - whether keynotes, seminars, or workshops - leave clients with insights into their behavior, psychology, and keys to their empowerment. His training methodologies are the result of over a decade of coaching, therapy, and education of thousands of students around the world. Join him on the “DTPHD Podcast” as he explores deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. Subscribe now. Connect with David Tian here: Website: https://www.davidtianphd.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/davidtianphd DTPHD Podcast Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ Man Up Show Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/manupcommunity/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/TheAuraUniversity Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/davidtianphd/ Podcast: https://www.davidtianphd.com/dtphdpodcast Medium: https://medium.com/@davidtian Twitter: https://twitter.com/davidtianphd ***** For transcriptions and more free resources, go here: https://www.davidtianphd.com/life-decisions/love-is-to-be-vulnerable/

***** Most people live their whole lives perpetually in pursuit of the rainbow's end, never brave, nor kind, nor happy NOW… but always putting off into the Future all the gratitude, appreciation, or enjoyment offered them in the Present. ***** For over a decade, David Tian, Ph.D., has helped hundreds of thousands of people from over 87 countries find happiness, success, and fulfillment in their social, professional, and love lives. His presentations - whether keynotes, seminars, or workshops - leave clients with insights into their behavior, psychology, and keys to their empowerment. His training methodologies are the result of over a decade of coaching, therapy, and education of thousands of students around the world. Join him on the “DTPHD Podcast” as he explores deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. Subscribe now. Connect with David Tian here: Website: https://www.davidtianphd.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/davidtianphd DTPHD Podcast Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ Man Up Show Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/manupcommunity/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/TheAuraUniversity Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/davidtianphd/ Podcast: https://www.davidtianphd.com/dtphdpodcast Medium: https://medium.com/@davidtian Twitter: https://twitter.com/davidtianphd ***** For transcriptions and more free resources, go here: https://www.davidtianphd.com/happiness/living-present-challenge-think-smaller/

***** When the #metoo movement became toxic, it violated emotional boundaries. Many think Boundaries are just about preventing people from taking advantage of you. Like, your mom shouldn't be interfering in your dispute at work. Or your patient shouldn't be showing up at your kid's birthday party. Or you shouldn't just let strangers invade your private space. But that's not the most important definition of Boundaries in psychology. Healthy psychological boundaries mean that you take full responsibility for your actions and emotions… and do not take responsibility for the actions and emotions of others. For example, when we date, we have the freedom to say, at any time, “This isn't working out,” and to end the relationship. The other person has the same freedom. Boundary violations occur when you disown your choices and try to lay the responsibility for them on someone else. This is what happens when your spouse doesn't let you go out with your friends because he gets too jealous that you're having fun without him. That's a boundary violation. It's a boundary violation when your mom won't let you take that job promotion overseas because she would miss you too much. It's a boundary violation when your date makes you responsible for her feelings and actions and does not take responsibility for her own feelings and actions. When the #metoo movement, which started as “empowerment through empathy”, which is a beautiful and good cause… and sharing devastating, heartbreaking stories of sexual assault… then devolved into witch hunts and public shaming based on unproven accusations of micro aggressions with no due process for the accusers… it became toxic. Shaming is a primary weapon of the toxic kind of #metoo. And shaming is a common tactic of narcissistic personality disordered people. We should *empathise* with one another, not *be* one another. I can't feel your feelings for you. I can't think for you. I can't behave for you. I can't work through your pain or suffering for you. I can't grow for you; only you can. Likewise, you can't grow for me. You are responsible for yourself. I am responsible for myself. ***** For a more detailed exposition of my views on toxic #metoo, see my recent podcast here: https://www.davidtianphd.com/podcast/metoo-become-toxic/ ***** For over a decade, David Tian, Ph.D., has helped hundreds of thousands of people from over 87 countries find happiness, success, and fulfillment in their social, professional, and love lives. His presentations - whether keynotes, seminars, or workshops - leave clients with insights into their behavior, psychology, and keys to their empowerment. His training methodologies are the result of over a decade of coaching, therapy, and education of thousands of students around the world. Join him on the “DTPHD Podcast” as he explores deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. Subscribe now. Connect with David Tian here: Website: https://www.davidtianphd.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/davidtianphd DTPHD Podcast Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ Man Up Show Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/manupcommunity/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/TheAuraUniversity Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/davidtianphd/ Podcast: https://www.davidtianphd.com/dtphdpodcast Medium: https://medium.com/@davidtian Twitter: https://twitter.com/davidtianphd ***** For transcriptions and more free resources, go here: https://www.davidtianphd.com/psychology/metoo-violates-mens-boundaries/

***** He told me, "You're just an ant!" And from this, I learned how not to be intimidated by people I want to impress. Sure, you can trick people in the short-term. But if you want your life to go well in the long run, be open and forthright. If they're worthy of impressing, then they should be able to see right through your attempts to impress them. So just assume they can see everything, and be transparent and honest with them and most importantly, with yourself. ***** For over a decade, David Tian, Ph.D., has helped hundreds of thousands of people from over 87 countries find happiness, success, and fulfillment in their social, professional, and love lives. His presentations - whether keynotes, seminars, or workshops - leave clients with insights into their behavior, psychology, and keys to their empowerment. His training methodologies are the result of over a decade of coaching, therapy, and education of thousands of students around the world. Join him on the “DTPHD Podcast” as he explores deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. Subscribe now. Connect with David Tian here: Website: https://www.davidtianphd.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/davidtianphd DTPHD Podcast Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ Man Up Show Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/manupcommunity/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/TheAuraUniversity Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/davidtianphd/ Podcast: https://www.davidtianphd.com/dtphdpodcast Medium: https://medium.com/@davidtian Twitter: https://twitter.com/davidtianphd ***** For transcriptions and more free resources, go here: https://www.davidtianphd.com/life-decisions/just-an-ant/

***** Join David Tian on the “DTPHD Podcast” as we explore deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. For the show notes, go here: https://www.davidtianphd.com/podcast/metoo-become-toxic/ Join our private Facebook group here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ ***** For over a decade, David Tian, Ph.D., has helped hundreds of thousands of people from over 87 countries find happiness, success, and fulfillment in their social, professional, and love lives. His presentations - whether keynotes, seminars, or workshops - leave clients with insights into their behavior, psychology, and keys to their empowerment. His training methodologies are the result of over a decade of coaching, therapy, and education of thousands of students around the world. Join him on the “DTPHD Podcast” as he explores deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. Subscribe now. Connect with David Tian here: Website: https://www.davidtianphd.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/davidtianphd DTPHD Podcast Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ Man Up Show Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/manupcommunity/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/TheAuraUniversity Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/davidtianphd/ Podcast: https://www.davidtianphd.com/dtphdpodcast Medium: https://medium.com/@davidtian Twitter: https://twitter.com/davidtianphd ***** Show Notes: 00:30 My reflections on the Tony Robbins and #metoo controversy 04:20 Why some women put up with corrupt men 08:57 What the #MeToo movement wants 14:08 How to get closure from a traumatic experience 18:45 Why it's hard to prosecute sexual assault cases 23:03 The thing that men need to understand when a woman is sexually assaulted 27:13 The aftermath of the Weinstein controversy 32:26 What makes the #MeToo movement toxic 36:40 Some of my personal experiences with feminist or #metoo witch-hunts 42:26 This happens when people don't go under personal transformation 48:10 The repercussions of a witch-hunt environment 52:40 Why the #MeToo situation is confusing for men 57:50 This is the future trend of dating 01:01:51 What the toxic #MeToo movement violates For transcriptions and more free resources, go here: https://www.davidtianphd.com/podcast/metoo-become-toxic/

***** "Practical Psychology for Extraordinary Living" is a special seminar series continuing the themes explored in the "Modern Mating Explained" video series, exploring the practical implications of deeper reflection on psychology for the art of living. ***** For over a decade, David Tian, Ph.D., has helped hundreds of thousands of people from over 87 countries find happiness, success, and fulfillment in their social, professional, and love lives. His presentations - whether keynotes, seminars, or workshops - leave clients with insights into their behavior, psychology, and keys to their empowerment. His training methodologies are the result of over a decade of coaching, therapy, and education of thousands of students around the world. Join him on the “DTPHD Podcast” as he explores deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. Subscribe now. Connect with David Tian here: Website: https://www.davidtianphd.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/davidtianphd DTPHD Podcast Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ Man Up Show Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/manupcommunity/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/TheAuraUniversity Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/davidtianphd/ Podcast: https://www.davidtianphd.com/dtphdpodcast Medium: https://medium.com/@davidtian Twitter: https://twitter.com/davidtianphd ***** David Tian Ph.D.: Alright. Welcome back! This is part of a series that is the Practical Psychology Series. Today, we're going to be getting into true self. This is a huge topic, the true self. So I had actually recorded some other footage from an earlier seminar, and then because we had dozens and dozens of hours of footage, it all got mixed up and I think I deleted it by mistake. So, we're re-shooting some of this. The true self is a very important topic, but only because obviously you want to learn about what your true self is and all of that, but because it informs every single other topic in psychology, in personal psychology, and it is the key to fulfilment, and passion, and happiness in life that will last over the long term. Ultimately, the true self concept is one in which, if you don't understand it, and you never retrieve it and act from it, you'll never actually experience love either. But you might think you're experiencing love, which is how most of the world is. And then they get a divorce and they thought they fell out of love, but they were actually never in love. You've already watched the series on narcissism, narcissistic personally disorder and all of that, so I'm not going to review all of that. The videos leading up to this include the four-part Modern Mating Explained series and the first two parts of this series. So I think this will be going into Practical Psychology, but we'll see. For transcriptions and more free resources, go here: https://www.davidtianphd.com/psychology/your-true-self/

***** Join David Tian on the “DTPHD Podcast” as we explore deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. For the show notes, go here: https://www.davidtianphd.com/podcast/you-are-a-hotel/ Join our private Facebook group here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ ***** For over a decade, David Tian, Ph.D., has helped hundreds of thousands of people from over 87 countries find happiness, success, and fulfillment in their social, professional, and love lives. His presentations - whether keynotes, seminars, or workshops - leave clients with insights into their behavior, psychology, and keys to their empowerment. His training methodologies are the result of over a decade of coaching, therapy, and education of thousands of students around the world. Join him on the “DTPHD Podcast” as he explores deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. Subscribe now. Connect with David Tian here: Website: https://www.davidtianphd.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/davidtianphd DTPHD Podcast Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ Man Up Show Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/manupcommunity/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/TheAuraUniversity Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/davidtianphd/ Podcast: https://www.davidtianphd.com/dtphdpodcast Medium: https://medium.com/@davidtian Twitter: https://twitter.com/davidtianphd ***** Show Notes: 1:14 Why are we like a hotel? 4:45 How do you get people to go to your “hotel”? 8:59 Why some people can't maintain relationships 14:29 This is how you get your love to come back 18:22 Why would you need to continuously improve yourself? 22:34 This happens when you stop going out of your comfort zone 26:33 When are you at your most attractive? 31:43 Why is false advertising such a big deal in dating and relationships? 36:45 Why working on your personality is important For transcriptions and more free resources, go here: https://www.davidtianphd.com/podcast/you-are-a-hotel/

***** "The Meaning of Life & Death" is a special seminar series inspired by Ernest Becker's Pulitzer Prize-winning book, "Denial of Death." The series comes from footage taken during a day-long session from an Aura Mastermind gathering in New York City. This seminar series explores the themes of life purpose, the meaning of life, the search for immortality, and the significance of death in human psychology and cultures. This video series was also a bonus component in the 8-week course "Lifestyle Mastery," which examines the purpose of life and many other related issues. ***** For over a decade, David Tian, Ph.D., has helped hundreds of thousands of people from over 87 countries find happiness, success, and fulfillment in their social, professional, and love lives. His presentations - whether keynotes, seminars, or workshops - leave clients with insights into their behavior, psychology, and keys to their empowerment. His training methodologies are the result of over a decade of coaching, therapy, and education of thousands of students around the world. Join him on the “DTPHD Podcast” as he explores deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. Subscribe now. Connect with David Tian here: Website: https://www.davidtianphd.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/davidtianphd DTPHD Podcast Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ Man Up Show Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/manupcommunity/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/TheAuraUniversity Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/davidtianphd/ Podcast: https://www.davidtianphd.com/dtphdpodcast Medium: https://medium.com/@davidtian Twitter: https://twitter.com/davidtianphd Here's a link to Ernest Becker, "Denial of Death" https://www.amazon.com/Denial-Death-Ernest-Becker/dp/0684832402 ***** David Tian, Ph.D.: The standard culture solution is this, and this is what we see maybe in your life, the average person's life here, the majority of the world, is to play it safe. They choose standard transference objects, your parents, your boss, your leader, your political leader, your sports team; and they try to be a good provider or a solid citizen. And then your life had meaning. You're a solid citizen, you contributed to the taxes, you had a good job, you paid your dues. He earns his species immortality as an agent of procreation. He did his duty, and now he popped out some babies. He's an agent of collective immortality. He's achieved immortality collectively by being part of something, a group that's bigger than him, like a country or something. For transcriptions and more free resources, go here: https://www.davidtianphd.com/psychology/the-meaning-of-life-death-4/

***** "The Meaning of Life & Death" is a special seminar series inspired by Ernest Becker's Pulitzer Prize-winning book, "Denial of Death." The series comes from footage taken during a day-long session from an Aura Mastermind gathering in New York City. This seminar series explores the themes of life purpose, the meaning of life, the search for immortality, and the significance of death in human psychology and cultures. This video series was also a bonus component in the 8-week course "Lifestyle Mastery," which examines the purpose of life and many other related issues. ***** For over a decade, David Tian, Ph.D., has helped hundreds of thousands of people from over 87 countries find happiness, success, and fulfillment in their social, professional, and love lives. His presentations - whether keynotes, seminars, or workshops - leave clients with insights into their behavior, psychology, and keys to their empowerment. His training methodologies are the result of over a decade of coaching, therapy, and education of thousands of students around the world. Join him on the “DTPHD Podcast” as he explores deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. Subscribe now. Connect with David Tian here: Website: https://www.davidtianphd.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/davidtianphd DTPHD Podcast Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ Man Up Show Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/manupcommunity/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/TheAuraUniversity Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/davidtianphd/ Podcast: https://www.davidtianphd.com/dtphdpodcast Medium: https://medium.com/@davidtian Twitter: https://twitter.com/davidtianphd Here's a link to Ernest Becker, "Denial of Death" https://www.amazon.com/Denial-Death-Ernest-Becker/dp/0684832402 ***** David Tian, Ph.D.: And try to live longer, to find immortality, literally. Everything we do is going that direction; trying to live longer. There are always these outliers who are weird, all the daredevils. AUDIENCE: So let's assume for a moment that humanity doesn't get there and 200 years from now, or 1,000 years from now, life's still dying. At some point, they realize their own futile- David Tian, Ph.D.: Oh yes! If our lifespans get shorter, I think we'll put more stock on the now. If your A.I. robots take over, and we have a terminator situation, and there's no food and water easily gotten, I think we'd go back to primitive times when it's a bit better. Well in terms of, enjoyed the now. But then we have, objectively speaking, a horrible life. For transcriptions and more free resources, go here: https://www.davidtianphd.com/psychology/meaning-of-life-death-3/

***** "The Meaning of Life & Death" is a special seminar series inspired by Ernest Becker's Pulitzer Prize-winning book, "Denial of Death." The series comes from footage taken during a day-long session from an Aura Mastermind gathering in New York City. This seminar series explores the themes of life purpose, the meaning of life, the search for immortality, and the significance of death in human psychology and cultures. This video series was also a bonus component in the 8-week course "Lifestyle Mastery," which examines the purpose of life and many other related issues. ***** For over a decade, David Tian, Ph.D., has helped hundreds of thousands of people from over 87 countries find happiness, success, and fulfillment in their social, professional, and love lives. His presentations - whether keynotes, seminars, or workshops - leave clients with insights into their behavior, psychology, and keys to their empowerment. His training methodologies are the result of over a decade of coaching, therapy, and education of thousands of students around the world. Join him on the “DTPHD Podcast” as he explores deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. Subscribe now. Connect with David Tian here: Website: https://www.davidtianphd.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/davidtianphd DTPHD Podcast Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ Man Up Show Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/manupcommunity/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/TheAuraUniversity Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/davidtianphd/ Podcast: https://www.davidtianphd.com/dtphdpodcast Medium: https://medium.com/@davidtian Twitter: https://twitter.com/davidtianphd Here's a link to Ernest Becker, "Denial of Death" https://www.amazon.com/Denial-Death-Ernest-Becker/dp/0684832402 ***** David Tian, Ph.D.: The desire to live longer, and have your kids live longer, and life lasting longer, being inherently seeming to us a good thing is a really important thing to realize. I left last time with this slide here of total repression. What does this mean? So, in the earlier work that I've done in Awakenings, in Rock Solid, Masculine Mastery, in earlier summits, I went in depth for years about depression, of childhood traumas, and the basic neurosis. And one of the reasons why this book kept getting sided in all of the other literature was because, what this is doing is it's taking it to its logical conclusion. The conclusion is that our entire lives in all of human history is a repression. We're going to explore what that means. For transcriptions and more free resources, go here: https://www.davidtianphd.com/psychology/life-and-death-2/

***** "The Meaning of Life & Death" is a special seminar series inspired by Ernest Becker's Pulitzer Prize-winning book, "Denial of Death." The series comes from footage taken during a day-long session from an Aura Mastermind gathering in New York City. This seminar series explores the themes of life purpose, the meaning of life, the search for immortality, and the significance of death in human psychology and cultures. This video series was also a bonus component in the 8-week course "Lifestyle Mastery," which examines the purpose of life and many other related issues. ***** For over a decade, David Tian, Ph.D., has helped hundreds of thousands of people from over 87 countries find happiness, success, and fulfillment in their social, professional, and love lives. His presentations - whether keynotes, seminars, or workshops - leave clients with insights into their behavior, psychology, and keys to their empowerment. His training methodologies are the result of over a decade of coaching, therapy, and education of thousands of students around the world. Join him on the “DTPHD Podcast” as he explores deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. Subscribe now. Connect with David Tian here: Website: https://www.davidtianphd.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/davidtianphd DTPHD Podcast Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ Man Up Show Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/manupcommunity/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/TheAuraUniversity Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/davidtianphd/ Podcast: https://www.davidtianphd.com/dtphdpodcast Medium: https://medium.com/@davidtian Twitter: https://twitter.com/davidtianphd Here's a link to Ernest Becker, "Denial of Death" https://www.amazon.com/Denial-Death-Ernest-Becker/dp/0684832402 ***** David Tian, Ph.D.: The psycho-therapeutic rebirth of a neurotic going through therapy, which is hopefully all of us, is like a member of Alcoholic Anonymous: You can never take this cure for granted, and the best sign of the genuineness of that cure is that he lives with humility. I submit to you that all of the knowledge, or facts, or thoughts that I'll be presenting here, the ideas, are submitted humbly as another journeymen on the way to death, living life as best as I can. Actually, this is a really great example that if you think you don't need therapy, if you think you're not a neurotic, you're sorely mistaken and still in illusion as obviously we'll talk about that if you want, but that'll be coming up. You'll see why all of humanity begins coming out of childhood as a neurotic necessarily as a human being. For transcriptions and more free resources, go here: https://www.davidtianphd.com/psychology/the-meaning-of-life-death/

***** "Practical Psychology for Extraordinary Living" is a special seminar series continuing the themes explored in the "Modern Mating Explained" video series, exploring the practical implications of deeper reflection on psychology for the art of living. ***** For over a decade, David Tian, Ph.D., has helped hundreds of thousands of people from over 87 countries find happiness, success, and fulfillment in their social, professional, and love lives. His presentations - whether keynotes, seminars, or workshops - leave clients with insights into their behavior, psychology, and keys to their empowerment. His training methodologies are the result of over a decade of coaching, therapy, and education of thousands of students around the world. Join him on the “DTPHD Podcast” as he explores deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. Subscribe now. Connect with David Tian here: Website: https://www.davidtianphd.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/davidtianphd DTPHD Podcast Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ Man Up Show Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/manupcommunity/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/TheAuraUniversity Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/davidtianphd/ Podcast: https://www.davidtianphd.com/dtphdpodcast Medium: https://medium.com/@davidtian Twitter: https://twitter.com/davidtianphd ***** David Tian, Ph.D.: The previous section ended on a kind of dour note. I was warning you what not to do, what to avoid and what you can't ignore. And in this section, it's much more upbeat. It's going to be the how-to on how to solve the issue and walk you through the solution. It will be the path to your freedom, that's a trigger word for men. They like it. Freedom! I like freedom. The path to your masculine power, the path to riches, the women and all the good stuff that you want. The more thorough solution is committing to a therapeutic process, and that means either getting psychotherapy or counseling; not psychiatry, not medicating but actually being there with the therapist and feeling through your issues. For transcriptions and more free resources, go here: https://www.davidtianphd.com/psychology/your-inner-child/

***** "Modern Mating Explained" is a special seminar series that explores the deeper psychological bases for mating in the modern world. ***** For over a decade, David Tian, Ph.D., has helped hundreds of thousands of people from over 87 countries find happiness, success, and fulfillment in their social, professional, and love lives. His presentations - whether keynotes, seminars, or workshops - leave clients with insights into their behavior, psychology, and keys to their empowerment. His training methodologies are the result of over a decade of coaching, therapy, and education of thousands of students around the world. Join him on the “DTPHD Podcast” as he explores deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. Subscribe now. Connect with David Tian here: Website: https://www.davidtianphd.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/davidtianphd DTPHD Podcast Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ Man Up Show Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/manupcommunity/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/TheAuraUniversity Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/davidtianphd/ Podcast: https://www.davidtianphd.com/dtphdpodcast Medium: https://medium.com/@davidtian Twitter: https://twitter.com/davidtianphd ***** Okay, welcome back. We're continuing, well, finishing off the section on narcissism, narcissistic co-dependents and how co-dependents are basically narcissists and so on. And so far, this whole time, we've still just been focusing on the problem, understanding the problem. I haven't yet started talking about the solution very much. I did mention self-awareness and self-acceptance, but we're just getting clear on the problem. Once you get clear on the problem, the solution is a lot more straightforward, though obviously there's a lot more to say about that as well. And we've been focusing largely on the fixer, on the compensator, the white knight, the person who took the moving towards coping strategy to get love and affection. So, now, we're going to look at that dynamic between the fixer and the predator. In other words, what the aspiring pick-up artist and the hot girl who would be naturally attracted to him in that state, being the narcissist that he is. Who would he attract? Would an emotionally secure person be sexually attracted to somebody like that, an aspiring pick-up artist who has spent a lot of time, not just the guy — like, again, there's that first option, the guy who gets it very easily and doesn't need to spend more than a couple of weeks learning some of these systems and things, methods, and then just applying them. But I mean the vast majority of men, who, if they weren't good with women naturally, they had to learn it. That process of learning it was more arduous. For transcriptions and more free resources, go here: https://www.davidtianphd.com/dating/the-achiever-pleaser-rebel/

***** Join David Tian on the “DTPHD Podcast” as we explore deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. Access the show notes here: https://www.davidtianphd.com/podcast/masculine-feminine-polarity/ Join our private Facebook group here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ ***** For over a decade, David Tian, Ph.D., has helped hundreds of thousands of people from over 87 countries find happiness, success, and fulfillment in their social, professional, and love lives. His presentations - whether keynotes, seminars, or workshops - leave clients with insights into their behavior, psychology, and keys to their empowerment. His training methodologies are the result of over a decade of coaching, therapy, and education of thousands of students around the world. Join him on the “DTPHD Podcast” as he explores deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. Subscribe now. Connect with David Tian here: Website: https://www.davidtianphd.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/davidtianphd DTPHD Podcast Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ Man Up Show Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/manupcommunity/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/TheAuraUniversity Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/davidtianphd/ Podcast: https://www.davidtianphd.com/dtphdpodcast Medium: https://medium.com/@davidtian Twitter: https://twitter.com/davidtianphd ***** HENRY CHONG is our special guest speaker on this episode. Henry is Director of Fusang Capital, a fund management company that manages the assets of multi-family offices. He is also a Director at the Portcullis Group, Asia's biggest independent group of trust companies, providing comprehensive wealth administration to high-net-worth individuals, providing a one-stop shop for corporate, trustee, and fund administration services to individuals, family offices, philanthropies, private banks, and investment managers. Henry is a graduate of Oxford University with a B.A. (Hons) in Philosophy Politics & Economics and is a founder of the Oxford Economics Society. He also holds a M.Sc. in Behavioral Science from the London School of Economics and is a Fellow of the Royal Society of Arts (FRSC). He will be sharing with us from his deep insights in behavioral economics, finance, health, and psychology. Connect with Henry here: http://henrychong.com/http://henrychong.com/ ***** Show Notes: 12:47 How is your gender different from your sexual energy? 17:42 The secret to creating great passion in your life 21:00 Why you're probably getting the definition of masculinity and femininity wrong 27:48 What women want the most from their men 31:11 The huge problem you'll encounter when you get stuck with gender roles 35:21 How to discover the dominant energy within you 39:00 Signs that determine if you are a mature or an immature masculine 43:11 Is having masculine or feminine energy a choice a person can make? 47:08 What men search for all their lives For transcriptions and more free resources, go here: https://www.davidtianphd.com/podcast/masculine-feminine-polarity/

***** Join David Tian on the “DTPHD Podcast” as we explore deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. Access the show notes here: https://www.davidtianphd.com/podcast/personas-feminism-anger/ Join our private Facebook group here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ ***** For over a decade, David Tian, Ph.D., has helped hundreds of thousands of people from over 87 countries find happiness, success, and fulfillment in their social, professional, and love lives. His presentations - whether keynotes, seminars, or workshops - leave clients with insights into their behavior, psychology, and keys to their empowerment. His training methodologies are the result of over a decade of coaching, therapy, and education of thousands of students around the world. Join him on the “DTPHD Podcast” as he explores deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. Subscribe now. Connect with David Tian here: Website: https://www.davidtianphd.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/davidtianphd DTPHD Podcast Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ Man Up Show Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/manupcommunity/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/TheAuraUniversity Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/davidtianphd/ Podcast: https://www.davidtianphd.com/dtphdpodcast Medium: https://medium.com/@davidtian Twitter: https://twitter.com/davidtianphd ***** Show Notes: 05:36 The most common mistake men make when pursuing women 09:17 How do you recognize your adaptive self 14:35 Is it normal to have multiple personas? 18:06 How does one reveal their true self 23:48 Doing these activities can help you achieve happiness and fulfillment 28:02 That factor that causes damage to men 33:35 Has feminism gone too far? 37:28 This happens when a female adopts a male-mating strategy 42:15 How being enlightened can change the way you enjoy life 47:05 Why haters hate For transcriptions and more free resources, go here: https://www.davidtianphd.com/podcast/personas-feminism-anger/

***** "Practical Psychology for Extraordinary Living" is a special seminar series continuing the themes explored in the "Modern Mating Explained" video series, exploring the practical implications of deeper reflection on psychology for the art of living. ***** For over a decade, David Tian, Ph.D., has helped hundreds of thousands of people from over 87 countries find happiness, success, and fulfillment in their social, professional, and love lives. His presentations - whether keynotes, seminars, or workshops - leave clients with insights into their behavior, psychology, and keys to their empowerment. His training methodologies are the result of over a decade of coaching, therapy, and education of thousands of students around the world. Join him on the “DTPHD Podcast” as he explores deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. Subscribe now. Connect with David Tian here: Website: https://www.davidtianphd.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/davidtianphd DTPHD Podcast Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ Man Up Show Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/manupcommunity/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/TheAuraUniversity Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/davidtianphd/ Podcast: https://www.davidtianphd.com/dtphdpodcast Medium: https://medium.com/@davidtian Twitter: https://twitter.com/davidtianphd ***** David Tian, Ph.D.: The third section in this one is looking at the concept of shame. Why is shame important? Shame is a shaming concept. If you were to just tell them point blank, “The truth is, you're dealing with shame”, they'd be like, “No, I'm not! I have no shame. I have no shame.” That's why I'm very careful about the use of this special term, though if you were to speak to a specialist or a researcher, this would be the most accurate term to use. The reason guys have approach anxiety that is more than, let's say, 2 out of 10 in intensity is because of shame. The reason you have blockages in your conversation with a woman where your mind goes blank, or you start to stutter because you're not sure what to say next, is because of shame. This is assuming that you have the intelligence to speak to somebody else already. If you are an incredibly low-IQ or you're not functioning as a verbal adult, maybe that's the reason why you can't speak. Assuming you can speak to me or to other males, or other human beings, the reason why you have approach anxiety, or social anxiety, or that you go blank in conversation, or that you can't escalate at whatever levels, physically, verbally, whatever, with a woman that you like is because of shame. It's all because of shame. For transcriptions and more free resources, go here: https://www.davidtianphd.com/psychology/courage-of-vulnerability/

***** Join David Tian on the “DTPHD Podcast” as we explore deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. Access the show notes here: https://www.davidtianphd.com/podcast/think-about-your-goals/ Join our private Facebook group here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ ***** For over a decade, David Tian, Ph.D., has helped hundreds of thousands of people from over 87 countries find happiness, success, and fulfillment in their social, professional, and love lives. His presentations - whether keynotes, seminars, or workshops - leave clients with insights into their behavior, psychology, and keys to their empowerment. His training methodologies are the result of over a decade of coaching, therapy, and education of thousands of students around the world. Join him on the “DTPHD Podcast” as he explores deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. Subscribe now. Connect with David Tian here: Website: https://www.davidtianphd.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/davidtianphd DTPHD Podcast Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ Man Up Show Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/manupcommunity/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/TheAuraUniversity Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/davidtianphd/ Podcast: https://www.davidtianphd.com/dtphdpodcast Medium: https://medium.com/@davidtian Twitter: https://twitter.com/davidtianphd ***** HENRY CHONG is our special guest speaker on this episode. Henry is Director of Fusang Capital, a fund management company that manages the assets of multi-family offices. He is also a Director at the Portcullis Group, Asia's biggest independent group of trust companies, providing comprehensive wealth administration to high-net-worth individuals, providing a one-stop shop for corporate, trustee, and fund administration services to individuals, family offices, philanthropies, private banks, and investment managers. Henry is a graduate of Oxford University with a B.A. (Hons) in Philosophy Politics & Economics and is a founder of the Oxford Economics Society. He also holds a M.Sc. in Behavioral Science from the London School of Economics and is a Fellow of the Royal Society of Arts (FRSC). He will be sharing with us from his deep insights in behavioral economics, finance, health, and psychology. Connect with Henry here: http://henrychong.com/http://henrychong.com/ ***** Show Notes: 0:57 This powerful tool helps you get your goals 4:59 This is how great athletes win the game 10:36 How to get what you really want 13:22 What people are really after 18:46 The importance of self-awareness 22:26 The two emotions that define a good visualization For transcriptions and more free resources, go here: https://www.davidtianphd.com/podcast/think-about-your-goals/

***** Join David Tian on the “DTPHD Podcast” as we explore deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. Access the show notes here: https://www.davidtianphd.com/podcast/take-action-on-your-goals/ Join our private Facebook group here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ ***** For over a decade, David Tian, Ph.D., has helped hundreds of thousands of people from over 87 countries find happiness, success, and fulfillment in their social, professional, and love lives. His presentations - whether keynotes, seminars, or workshops - leave clients with insights into their behavior, psychology, and keys to their empowerment. His training methodologies are the result of over a decade of coaching, therapy, and education of thousands of students around the world. Join him on the “DTPHD Podcast” as he explores deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. Subscribe now. Connect with David Tian here: Website: https://www.davidtianphd.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/davidtianphd DTPHD Podcast Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dtphdpodcast/ Man Up Show Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/manupcommunity/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/TheAuraUniversity Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/davidtianphd/ Podcast: https://www.davidtianphd.com/dtphdpodcast Medium: https://medium.com/@davidtian Twitter: https://twitter.com/davidtianphd ***** HENRY CHONG is our special guest speaker on this episode. Henry is Director of Fusang Capital, a fund management company that manages the assets of multi-family offices. He is also a Director at the Portcullis Group, Asia's biggest independent group of trust companies, providing comprehensive wealth administration to high-net-worth individuals, providing a one-stop shop for corporate, trustee, and fund administration services to individuals, family offices, philanthropies, private banks, and investment managers. Henry is a graduate of Oxford University with a B.A. (Hons) in Philosophy Politics & Economics and is a founder of the Oxford Economics Society. He also holds a M.Sc. in Behavioral Science from the London School of Economics and is a Fellow of the Royal Society of Arts (FRSC). He will be sharing with us from his deep insights in behavioral economics, finance, health, and psychology. Connect with Henry here: http://henrychong.com/http://henrychong.com/ ***** Show Notes: 4:31 Why we procrastinate on important tasks 8:11 The scientific reasons why we procrastinate 13:13 How this resistance shows up in many small ways in our daily lives, and how if we don't face it in the small ways, we'll never step up in the big ways 14:47 The scientific reasons why many people procrastinate in going to the gym 16:17 The top method Henry Chong uses to guarantee he crush his goals 16:37 David has never revealed this about himself ever before — one of his biggest professional regrets 23:07 How to trick your brain into following through on any goal you set for yourself, no matter how intimidating For transcriptions and more free resources, go here: https://www.davidtianphd.com/podcast/take-action-on-your-goals/