Podcasts about damnit

How do song writers work? Do they write dirty songs first? Let's try it Headlines with the passing of Ozzy, more on him later too Sports with a ton of fake autographs hitting the memorabilia market

 Vivian's new sunscreen has some interesting side effects. By Bearclaw88 - Listen to the Podcast at Steamy Stories. “Lawn's all done, Ms. J,” Derek said as he walked from the shed to the patio. He wiped the sweat off his brow. It was another hot summer day and he was spending it doing odd jobs and honey-do's for his neighbor down the street. The forty five year old divorcee rolled on her side “For the last time honey, call me Vivian.” She eyed the tall, shirtless college student from behind her large sunglasses. She really scored some great eye candy this time.“Sure thing Miss; I mean Vivian,” replied Derek. Vivian watched through her large sunglasses as Derek walked back to where he left the mower. She bit her lower lip slightly as she checked out his fit and toned body. She especially enjoyed the view of his back and shoulders. They were her favorite part on a man. She loved the feeling of a strong man fucking her on top while she clawed his back and dug in with her nails. Vivian and Derek had been outside in the backyard for over an hour by this point. He pushed the mower over to the shed and walked back to the house to fetch the garden hose. Vivian was paying well, too much in his opinion, for just over an hour of yard work every couple days. In his opinion the yard didn't need mowing every other day, but she was insistent and willing to pay each time. Derek certainly didn't mind making easy money, nor seeing Vivian Johnson either for that matter. Vivian was in her mid-forties and the very definition of Milf. Shoulder length bleach blonde hair and bronze tan and an infectious smile with a flirtatious attitude toward the young man; was enough to keep him coming back. Vivian's other assets were what really sent the blood flowing down south. She was naturally gifted with large double D cup breasts and a nice round ass. Even though her body had lost some of its perkiness with her age, her breasts hung a little lower on her chest and she did have a slight stomach, she could still drive men crazy. The sun was really cooking now, it was late afternoon and Vivian was overdue on her sunscreen. She sat up from her reclined chair and reached underneath for the bottle. Unpopping the cap she aggressively shook the bottle into her empty palm, she could see Derek watching through her peripheral vision as her tits shook as well. “Damn, it's empty. I better hurry and find another one.” Vivian thought to herself. She opened the sliding glass door and was hit by a wall of cold air. Her skin broke out in goose bumps and she felt her nipples harden due to the abrupt change in temperature. She hurried to the hall closet where all her extra lotions, shampoos, soaps and odd assortment of towels were stored. Searching the middle shelf she picked up a white sunscreen bottle. This particular bottle was of a brand she had never heard of. In fact, she didn't even buy this, about a week ago it showed up on her doorstep with other items she had ordered online. Though the brand was unfamiliar she didn't think anything of it. Just another delivery mix up. This mix up was fortunate for her now. She went back outside, Derek was almost done washing off the mower, she made it in just the nick of time. She sat back on her lounge chair and popped the cap of the sunscreen bottle. The air was filled with a strong aroma, sweet and florally. Vivian couldn't help but take deep sniffs over and over. It was intoxicating, her heart rate quickened and the goosebumps returned. She felt her bikini bottoms moisten as she inhaled more scent. Each breath only increased her arousal. In her newly altered state she didn't notice that Derek was watching her more closely now, mostly out of curiosity, he had never seen her so enthralled with her sunscreen bottles. He walked over and stood next to her, he was becoming concerned now. Vivian was quivering in her chair with the bottle almost in her nostril. “Mrs. J, are you alright?” He asked. Her trance was momentarily broken. She looked up now realizing he was standing next to her. She looked him up and down behind her sunglasses, her bikini was practically floating away at this point. Her horny mind now took over. “Just wonderful my dear. I'm glad you came over because I wanted to ask if you wouldn't mind helping me with my sunscreen.” Vivian held the bottle and placed it in Derek's hand. She noticed the immediate bulge form in his red athletic shorts. Derek had fantasized about this very scenario multiple times but was still caught off guard. “Uh ya, sure!” He said. Derek squirted a large dollop into his palm, he too noticed the strong smell, but wasn't affected as she was. He set the bottle down by Vivian's leg and began to spread the sunscreen into his empty hand. Once his palms were sufficiently coated he sat down by her feet and began. Starting with her right foot he began to slowly spread the creamy product up her thick, tanned thigh. Vivian's breathing quickened as his strong hands inched closer to her pubic region. When her right leg was sufficiently covered he filled his palm with more from the bottle and repeated the same procedure for her left leg. Her legs now protected from the sun, Derek moved north. Using a larger amount of sunscreen he began on Vivian's stomach and spread it around in a rough circle starting from her navel. Vivian gripped the sides of her chair tightly as his hands massaged her waist and her hips. He gently moved his hands underneath the thin strings that held her bikini bottoms. Derek sat back upright and picked up the bottle. He squeezed the last of the sunscreen from the bottle into his hand. “There's not much left.” He said. “Then we better not waste it.” Vivian cooed. Derek got the hint and sat down on the edge of the chair at waist height. Vivian bit her lip and began to sensually rub her right hand on Derek's side. Derek leaned over and placed his lotion filled hand on her sternum, right between her tits. “What are you waiting for?” Vivian asked. She was writhing almost uncontrollably in her seat with anticipation. Derek reached out with both hands now and gathered some sunscreen and began to massage Vivian's large breasts. He worked the outsides first before sliding his greased hands under her polka dot pattern top. Her nipples were rock hard to the touch and each gentle touch elicited loud moans from the middle aged Milf. Vivian couldn't wait any longer, she slid her right hand under the leg of Derek's shorts and began to give him a massage as well. All bets were off now. Derek now leaned in and he and Vivian began making out in earnest. His left hand held the back of her head while his right slid under her bikini and began to rub her wet cunt. She reciprocated by more aggressively massaging his rock hard cock and balls. During their passionate foreplay Vivian began to notice that her chest was feeling tingly and warmer than before. The tingles she felt continued to build with intensity until she could no longer ignore it and broke off the embrace of the young stud. “What's wrong?” He asked. “My tits, they feel,” Vivian trailed off as her body was racked with a miniature orgasm. “Ah, ah, uh!” She moaned loudly. Her chest heaved up and down, her hands gripped the sides of the chair for support as she looked down at her chest. Derek's eyes followed hers and both of their jaws dropped. Vivian's breasts started growing larger. Her previously grapefruit sized melons were quickly enlarging by the second. The fabric and strings of her bikini strained and dug into her expanding tit flesh. Vivian's breasts showed no signs of stopping as they reached twice her previous size. There was a few more seconds of growth before they tapered out leaving her with volleyball sized tits hanging heavily on her chest. The small fabric of her top dug deeply into her sides and no longer covered her newly grown nipples. Vivian let go of the chair and carefully cupped the undersides of her gargantuan tits. She nearly came as she heaved them up and down. “Fuck! They're so; big.” she moaned while giving her tits a good shake. Vivian spent the next couple of minutes squeezing and kneading her huge breasts as Derek watched. After collecting herself momentarily her eyes hungrily locked back on to the pitched tent in his shorts. She reached back over and resumed pumping his cock under his clothes. Derek nearly came right then but was able to hold off just barely. He then quickly stood and stripped naked while Vivian ripped her bikini bottoms off. Vivian licked her lips at the sight of his toned, naked body out on full display. Not wanting to wait any longer she swung her legs upward and grabbed a hold of the back of her knees, smashing her legs into her overgrown chest. Derek lowered himself in his knees in front of her glistening snatch. Vivian gasped as he slid his six inch cock inside her cunt. She let go of her legs and let them rest on his shoulders as she grabbed onto the chair above her head. “Oh god just fuck me you fucking stud!” She cried. Derek grabbed onto her hips and began fucking her vigorously. The aluminum frame of the chair creaked and scratched against the concrete patio below as Vivian's giant jugs clapped into each other with each hard thrust. “Keep going! Faster!” She yelled. Derek picked up the pace, her voracious appetite for his cock was beginning to wear him out and the site of her massive tits were quickly sending him over the edge “Mrs. J I'm close! I don't think I can last much longer!” He gasped. “Just a little longer baby, I'm almost there!” It was about thirty seconds later when she let go of the chair and squeezed her tits together, mashing her hands into their swollen flesh and squeezing her hands so tight her knuckles were white. “Ah! Ah! Yes, yes yes!” She screamed as her body was rocked with the best orgasm of her life. Derek felt her cunt squeeze his cock tightly and he let loose as well. His overstimulated penis dumped a massive load into her cunt as he lost control of his breathing and his vision went blurry for a few seconds. Vivian's massive tits cushioned his fall as his exhausted body collapsed on top of her. It took a few minutes for Derek to regain his composure and he sat back upright. “I'm sorry, I couldn't hold back any longer.” He panted. Vivian reached up and caressed his cheek. “It's alright baby, but mommas not done yet.” She then squeezed her swollen tits together while licking her lips. “Do you have another one in you?” She asked. Derek smiled and said, “I think I do.” He reached over and picked up the empty bottle of sunscreen and violently shook the bottle into his hand. All his efforts paid off with two small dollops of thick cream. He felt his genitals tingle and come back to life as he lathered it on his semi limp cock and balls. Seconds later he was rock hard and hornier than even before. His cock was almost pulsating, waiting for release as it pointed angrily at Vivian's face. “I don't know where this stuff came from, but I think we need more” She said. Rachel's Perch Looking out the window onto the scene below, Rachel watched as Derek fucked Vivian's tits with reckless abandon. She brought her voice recorder to her lips and pressed the red button. “First trial mostly successful. Subject experienced intended rapid breast growth as planned. Lactation effect was unsuccessful. Subject libido appears to have enhanced as well.” She paused for a moment. “The male subject is also experiencing unplanned effects. I should look into that as well.” She placed the recorder on her desk next to several pill bottles. She continued to observe and couldn't help but reach her hand down her pants just as Derek filled Vivian's cleavage with his seed. “What are you doing?” Rachel fell backwards out of her chair, her arms flying and sending pill bottles everywhere. Brian stood in the doorway that she had left wide open, a large bulge was clearly visible through his sweatpants. Rachel lie on her back, a look of surprise still on her face and her hand still down her pants. “I can explain.” Vivian's Morning Shower Vivian sat on the floor of her spacious shower. Hot water striking her squarely on her huge tits. Her mind was running at a marathon pace. “How did this happen?” she asked herself aloud. A couple hours earlier her tits had rapidly swollen and enlarged to perky volleyball sized mountains that put most porn stars to shame. A wave of embarrassment washed over her as well. She had just fucked Derek, the young man home from college, out on her back patio. This wouldn't be too big a deal if she had lived in a more rural setting, but she didn't. Cliché suburbia with all her neighbors' houses packed close nearby. What if someone had seen them? Or had seen what happened to her? Derek lived just a few houses down and everyone knew that he mowed her lawn every couple of days. “No, I shouldn't worry about that now.” She said, Vivian carefully stood, the added weights on her chest proving tricky to navigate in the wet environment. She quickly went to work with her loofah and body wash to clean herself of the mystery sunscreen, and Derek's sweat and spunk. Each gentle pass on her large tits sent subtle waves of pleasure through her body. She dropped the loofa and began to lather her soap on her chest by hand. Another orgasm was steadily building as she caressed and squeezed her big tits. Vivian cupped her right breast and lifted it up and down, appreciating its new weight in her hand, she then lifted her engorged nipple towards her eager mouth. Vivian's knees nearly buckled as soon her nipple entered her mouth. It was as if a lightning bolt shot directly into her crotch. She had to sit back down and finish the job manually. It didn't take long at all. She shut the water off and exited the shower. After drying off she dressed in her white cotton robe, after tying the waist she caught herself checking out her new ample cleavage in the mirror. She went out into the kitchen, her sexual romp from earlier had left her parched. She poured a glass of tea from the pitcher in the fridge and went back to her room. “This can't be real, I must be dreaming.” She thought. She drank her tea and lay back on her pillows. The tea's caffeine was not strong enough to keep her from drifting into a fitful sleep. Morning Realities Vivian awoke late the next morning, she was groggy and stiff. The morning light shone brightly through her window. For a moment she had forgotten about the day prior, until she looked down toward her feet. Vivian's eyes bugged out when they set upon her giant tits as they heaved up and down with each concerned breath. She normally kept her house at a slightly chilly temperature while she slept and it was clear through the thin sheet that her large nipples objected to the chill. “Oh god! It was real!” She said after sitting up. After awkwardly using the restroom and donning her robe once again she went downstairs. She brewed some coffee and sat at the kitchen bar. She parted the top of her robe and looked intensely at her new assets. Vivian always considered herself calm during a crisis and this was no exception. A very personal crisis yes but not one she could overcome. “Ok, this is obviously very real and not going away. Something happened yesterday, ” she said while pacing around her kitchen. “Yesterday was normal until, until; the sunscreen!” Vivian hurried to the back patio. The bottle in question was on the ground. She picked it up and examined it closely. There was nothing on the bottle to lead her to think it was anything but ordinary sunscreen. Brand New You! Read the label, strange, Vivian didn't remember buying this brand, or if she had ever heard of it before. A slight breeze brought a sudden chill up and under her robe and she quickly retreated back inside. She decided that she might as well get dressed and plan her next move. “Damnit, none of my tops fit!” she said, frustrated. A decent pile of clothes had grown on her bed and she stood topless and feeling nearly defeated. The cool air and increased sensitivity kept her enlarged nipples hard, her recent wrestling match with her now too small shirts didn't help matters either. She was tempted to rub out a quickie on top of the clothes pile but fought the urge. She rifled almost desperately through her closet once more before noticing one top that had fallen off its hanger and was crumpled on the floor in the corner. It was a red button up blouse with white floral patterns. She had bought it ages ago and accidentally picked a couple sizes too big and forgot to return it. She was thankful for that memory lapse now, even though it was a bigger size Vivian struggled to button the front and had to compress her huge tits to fit. The blouse was stretched and gaps could be seen between the buttons that threatened to pop off. Vivian was now scared to take a deep breath lest she ruin the only outfit that sort of fit. She cautiously made her way downstairs with the intent of researching the sunscreen online. She didn't quite make it to her office when the doorbell rang. “Oh not now.” she said. Vivian hoped that whoever it was would leave or maybe it was a delivery person dropping off a package and leaving. She waited a couple minutes before the bell rang again. “Go away!” she shouted towards the door. Knock knock knock! Whoever it was would not give up. Vivian slowly walked to the door and brushed the curtains that covered the thin windows that flanked the door aside. To her surprise, and slight arousal, it was Derek. Brian & Rachel, and the backstory on enhancement treatments. Life for Brian would never be the same after that fateful night with Rachel a few months earlier. His best friend, Josh, introduced Brian to Rachel, his sister, when she came back home one night. Rachel gave Brian his best (and first) sexual experience of his life. She was different from before. Brian always knew she had a very large ass, his eyes worked and she wasn't afraid to flaunt it either. He had been living in her family's house for several months. They had an extra basement bedroom and knew Brian's home life was terrible. It was her family's generosity that helped him finish high school and start community college courses, it most likely kept him from following the wrong path of substance abuse and crime, which his parents took. For this, he was eternally grateful and tried to make up for it by at least helping around the house since they refused to allow him to pay rent. So Brian and Rachel were well acquainted. She was very attractive, and Brian frequently masturbated to her photos, but he never made any move. That is why he was taken by absolute surprise that special night. Josh had gone to sleep early and Brian stayed up to finish his video game's current quest. Rachel had other ideas, she came down the basement stairs, on the prowl for him. And that is where it got even more incredible for him. The already ample ass of Rachel seemed to be much bigger than the last he had seen her. His first thoughts in the whirlwind was that she had some kind of surgery done, and was showing off her ‘assets'. He had known that Rachel and her friend Tina were webcam girls, they were excellent at giving him fresh fap material and he was all too happy to pay the subscription each month. He had known Tina through Rachel for a couple years as well. At least he knew her before the webcam site. Now her tits had ballooned to outrageous, almost cartoonish proportions. There weren't many porn stars that came close to her size. Another unbelievable person was the guy they fucked in their shows, he didn't know who he was, but his cock; his cock was gigantic. Two feet long and thick as a soda can in the first videos and it was even bigger later on. Their popularity camgirl website grew in the expansion fetish community though everyone agreed that the huge cock was fake. What no one could agree on was if it was a well-made prosthetic, or some kind of special effects. Brian was a part of the prosthetic camp, at least until she came downstairs that night. Rachel produced some normal looking pills for him to take. Tina's mega tits, her giant ass, the monster cock guy; was all because of experimental pills. She didn't say how she came across them and he was too horny and enamored to care right then. She told him before he swallowed two of them that these were new fast acting, but temporary ones. She wasn't lying and a minute later Brian's average penis had grown from 5 inches to a 9 inch hog that Rachel milked dry for most of the night. She left the next day, leaving him with the rest of the cock pills. He tried to hold out and wait to use them for the next time she came back. He never before thought of himself as having an expansion fetish, it all seemed too much in the fantasy realm, he needed something more grounded in reality. But now it was real, and he experienced it firsthand, and he couldn't get enough. Now the bottle of pills taunted him, watching the web show with Rachel, Tina, and then some older woman, also with huge tits, was too much to bear. He stuck with the proper dosage instructions and only used the pills once a day. Jacking off with a 9 inch cock was incredible to say the least. His supply began to run out so he texted Rachel and a few days later a sizable box arrived with more cock pills Unbeknownst to Brian, his daily use of the pills had their toll as well. One morning he woke up to discover his morning wood pitching a taller tent than it should have. His cock hadn't reverted back to its normal size. He spent the entire day hiding from Rachel and Josh's mom Olivia, jacking off at least a dozen times. By the end of the day he was beyond spent. His erection was still stubbornly huge. There was nothing Brian could do but learn to live with the lingering effects of his overindulgence. His penis was permanently large, and the other side effects of heightened libido and having massive loads of cum weren't going away either. Fortunately he was able to hide his new endowment with baggy enough pants. Everything was going well for Brian once he learned how to effectively hide the salami in his pants. Rachel would come back every now and again, fuck his brains out; then leave. He didn't mind though. It was still sort of surreal that there really were pills that could enlarge people. He never really had an expansion fetish before, but now he loved every bit of it. And as far as he knew, Rachel's brother Josh and their mother Olivia had no idea. It was smooth sailing, at least up until, what Rachel dubbed, “The incident” To be continued… By Bearclaw88 for Literotica.

 Vivian's new sunscreen has some interesting side effects. By Bearclaw88 - Listen to the Podcast at Steamy Stories. “Lawn's all done, Ms. J,” Derek said as he walked from the shed to the patio. He wiped the sweat off his brow. It was another hot summer day and he was spending it doing odd jobs and honey-do's for his neighbor down the street. The forty five year old divorcee rolled on her side “For the last time honey, call me Vivian.” She eyed the tall, shirtless college student from behind her large sunglasses. She really scored some great eye candy this time.“Sure thing Miss; I mean Vivian,” replied Derek. Vivian watched through her large sunglasses as Derek walked back to where he left the mower. She bit her lower lip slightly as she checked out his fit and toned body. She especially enjoyed the view of his back and shoulders. They were her favorite part on a man. She loved the feeling of a strong man fucking her on top while she clawed his back and dug in with her nails. Vivian and Derek had been outside in the backyard for over an hour by this point. He pushed the mower over to the shed and walked back to the house to fetch the garden hose. Vivian was paying well, too much in his opinion, for just over an hour of yard work every couple days. In his opinion the yard didn't need mowing every other day, but she was insistent and willing to pay each time. Derek certainly didn't mind making easy money, nor seeing Vivian Johnson either for that matter. Vivian was in her mid-forties and the very definition of Milf. Shoulder length bleach blonde hair and bronze tan and an infectious smile with a flirtatious attitude toward the young man; was enough to keep him coming back. Vivian's other assets were what really sent the blood flowing down south. She was naturally gifted with large double D cup breasts and a nice round ass. Even though her body had lost some of its perkiness with her age, her breasts hung a little lower on her chest and she did have a slight stomach, she could still drive men crazy. The sun was really cooking now, it was late afternoon and Vivian was overdue on her sunscreen. She sat up from her reclined chair and reached underneath for the bottle. Unpopping the cap she aggressively shook the bottle into her empty palm, she could see Derek watching through her peripheral vision as her tits shook as well. “Damn, it's empty. I better hurry and find another one.” Vivian thought to herself. She opened the sliding glass door and was hit by a wall of cold air. Her skin broke out in goose bumps and she felt her nipples harden due to the abrupt change in temperature. She hurried to the hall closet where all her extra lotions, shampoos, soaps and odd assortment of towels were stored. Searching the middle shelf she picked up a white sunscreen bottle. This particular bottle was of a brand she had never heard of. In fact, she didn't even buy this, about a week ago it showed up on her doorstep with other items she had ordered online. Though the brand was unfamiliar she didn't think anything of it. Just another delivery mix up. This mix up was fortunate for her now. She went back outside, Derek was almost done washing off the mower, she made it in just the nick of time. She sat back on her lounge chair and popped the cap of the sunscreen bottle. The air was filled with a strong aroma, sweet and florally. Vivian couldn't help but take deep sniffs over and over. It was intoxicating, her heart rate quickened and the goosebumps returned. She felt her bikini bottoms moisten as she inhaled more scent. Each breath only increased her arousal. In her newly altered state she didn't notice that Derek was watching her more closely now, mostly out of curiosity, he had never seen her so enthralled with her sunscreen bottles. He walked over and stood next to her, he was becoming concerned now. Vivian was quivering in her chair with the bottle almost in her nostril. “Mrs. J, are you alright?” He asked. Her trance was momentarily broken. She looked up now realizing he was standing next to her. She looked him up and down behind her sunglasses, her bikini was practically floating away at this point. Her horny mind now took over. “Just wonderful my dear. I'm glad you came over because I wanted to ask if you wouldn't mind helping me with my sunscreen.” Vivian held the bottle and placed it in Derek's hand. She noticed the immediate bulge form in his red athletic shorts. Derek had fantasized about this very scenario multiple times but was still caught off guard. “Uh ya, sure!” He said. Derek squirted a large dollop into his palm, he too noticed the strong smell, but wasn't affected as she was. He set the bottle down by Vivian's leg and began to spread the sunscreen into his empty hand. Once his palms were sufficiently coated he sat down by her feet and began. Starting with her right foot he began to slowly spread the creamy product up her thick, tanned thigh. Vivian's breathing quickened as his strong hands inched closer to her pubic region. When her right leg was sufficiently covered he filled his palm with more from the bottle and repeated the same procedure for her left leg. Her legs now protected from the sun, Derek moved north. Using a larger amount of sunscreen he began on Vivian's stomach and spread it around in a rough circle starting from her navel. Vivian gripped the sides of her chair tightly as his hands massaged her waist and her hips. He gently moved his hands underneath the thin strings that held her bikini bottoms. Derek sat back upright and picked up the bottle. He squeezed the last of the sunscreen from the bottle into his hand. “There's not much left.” He said. “Then we better not waste it.” Vivian cooed. Derek got the hint and sat down on the edge of the chair at waist height. Vivian bit her lip and began to sensually rub her right hand on Derek's side. Derek leaned over and placed his lotion filled hand on her sternum, right between her tits. “What are you waiting for?” Vivian asked. She was writhing almost uncontrollably in her seat with anticipation. Derek reached out with both hands now and gathered some sunscreen and began to massage Vivian's large breasts. He worked the outsides first before sliding his greased hands under her polka dot pattern top. Her nipples were rock hard to the touch and each gentle touch elicited loud moans from the middle aged Milf. Vivian couldn't wait any longer, she slid her right hand under the leg of Derek's shorts and began to give him a massage as well. All bets were off now. Derek now leaned in and he and Vivian began making out in earnest. His left hand held the back of her head while his right slid under her bikini and began to rub her wet cunt. She reciprocated by more aggressively massaging his rock hard cock and balls. During their passionate foreplay Vivian began to notice that her chest was feeling tingly and warmer than before. The tingles she felt continued to build with intensity until she could no longer ignore it and broke off the embrace of the young stud. “What's wrong?” He asked. “My tits, they feel,” Vivian trailed off as her body was racked with a miniature orgasm. “Ah, ah, uh!” She moaned loudly. Her chest heaved up and down, her hands gripped the sides of the chair for support as she looked down at her chest. Derek's eyes followed hers and both of their jaws dropped. Vivian's breasts started growing larger. Her previously grapefruit sized melons were quickly enlarging by the second. The fabric and strings of her bikini strained and dug into her expanding tit flesh. Vivian's breasts showed no signs of stopping as they reached twice her previous size. There was a few more seconds of growth before they tapered out leaving her with volleyball sized tits hanging heavily on her chest. The small fabric of her top dug deeply into her sides and no longer covered her newly grown nipples. Vivian let go of the chair and carefully cupped the undersides of her gargantuan tits. She nearly came as she heaved them up and down. “Fuck! They're so; big.” she moaned while giving her tits a good shake. Vivian spent the next couple of minutes squeezing and kneading her huge breasts as Derek watched. After collecting herself momentarily her eyes hungrily locked back on to the pitched tent in his shorts. She reached back over and resumed pumping his cock under his clothes. Derek nearly came right then but was able to hold off just barely. He then quickly stood and stripped naked while Vivian ripped her bikini bottoms off. Vivian licked her lips at the sight of his toned, naked body out on full display. Not wanting to wait any longer she swung her legs upward and grabbed a hold of the back of her knees, smashing her legs into her overgrown chest. Derek lowered himself in his knees in front of her glistening snatch. Vivian gasped as he slid his six inch cock inside her cunt. She let go of her legs and let them rest on his shoulders as she grabbed onto the chair above her head. “Oh god just fuck me you fucking stud!” She cried. Derek grabbed onto her hips and began fucking her vigorously. The aluminum frame of the chair creaked and scratched against the concrete patio below as Vivian's giant jugs clapped into each other with each hard thrust. “Keep going! Faster!” She yelled. Derek picked up the pace, her voracious appetite for his cock was beginning to wear him out and the site of her massive tits were quickly sending him over the edge “Mrs. J I'm close! I don't think I can last much longer!” He gasped. “Just a little longer baby, I'm almost there!” It was about thirty seconds later when she let go of the chair and squeezed her tits together, mashing her hands into their swollen flesh and squeezing her hands so tight her knuckles were white. “Ah! Ah! Yes, yes yes!” She screamed as her body was rocked with the best orgasm of her life. Derek felt her cunt squeeze his cock tightly and he let loose as well. His overstimulated penis dumped a massive load into her cunt as he lost control of his breathing and his vision went blurry for a few seconds. Vivian's massive tits cushioned his fall as his exhausted body collapsed on top of her. It took a few minutes for Derek to regain his composure and he sat back upright. “I'm sorry, I couldn't hold back any longer.” He panted. Vivian reached up and caressed his cheek. “It's alright baby, but mommas not done yet.” She then squeezed her swollen tits together while licking her lips. “Do you have another one in you?” She asked. Derek smiled and said, “I think I do.” He reached over and picked up the empty bottle of sunscreen and violently shook the bottle into his hand. All his efforts paid off with two small dollops of thick cream. He felt his genitals tingle and come back to life as he lathered it on his semi limp cock and balls. Seconds later he was rock hard and hornier than even before. His cock was almost pulsating, waiting for release as it pointed angrily at Vivian's face. “I don't know where this stuff came from, but I think we need more” She said. Rachel's Perch Looking out the window onto the scene below, Rachel watched as Derek fucked Vivian's tits with reckless abandon. She brought her voice recorder to her lips and pressed the red button. “First trial mostly successful. Subject experienced intended rapid breast growth as planned. Lactation effect was unsuccessful. Subject libido appears to have enhanced as well.” She paused for a moment. “The male subject is also experiencing unplanned effects. I should look into that as well.” She placed the recorder on her desk next to several pill bottles. She continued to observe and couldn't help but reach her hand down her pants just as Derek filled Vivian's cleavage with his seed. “What are you doing?” Rachel fell backwards out of her chair, her arms flying and sending pill bottles everywhere. Brian stood in the doorway that she had left wide open, a large bulge was clearly visible through his sweatpants. Rachel lie on her back, a look of surprise still on her face and her hand still down her pants. “I can explain.” Vivian's Morning Shower Vivian sat on the floor of her spacious shower. Hot water striking her squarely on her huge tits. Her mind was running at a marathon pace. “How did this happen?” she asked herself aloud. A couple hours earlier her tits had rapidly swollen and enlarged to perky volleyball sized mountains that put most porn stars to shame. A wave of embarrassment washed over her as well. She had just fucked Derek, the young man home from college, out on her back patio. This wouldn't be too big a deal if she had lived in a more rural setting, but she didn't. Cliché suburbia with all her neighbors' houses packed close nearby. What if someone had seen them? Or had seen what happened to her? Derek lived just a few houses down and everyone knew that he mowed her lawn every couple of days. “No, I shouldn't worry about that now.” She said, Vivian carefully stood, the added weights on her chest proving tricky to navigate in the wet environment. She quickly went to work with her loofah and body wash to clean herself of the mystery sunscreen, and Derek's sweat and spunk. Each gentle pass on her large tits sent subtle waves of pleasure through her body. She dropped the loofa and began to lather her soap on her chest by hand. Another orgasm was steadily building as she caressed and squeezed her big tits. Vivian cupped her right breast and lifted it up and down, appreciating its new weight in her hand, she then lifted her engorged nipple towards her eager mouth. Vivian's knees nearly buckled as soon her nipple entered her mouth. It was as if a lightning bolt shot directly into her crotch. She had to sit back down and finish the job manually. It didn't take long at all. She shut the water off and exited the shower. After drying off she dressed in her white cotton robe, after tying the waist she caught herself checking out her new ample cleavage in the mirror. She went out into the kitchen, her sexual romp from earlier had left her parched. She poured a glass of tea from the pitcher in the fridge and went back to her room. “This can't be real, I must be dreaming.” She thought. She drank her tea and lay back on her pillows. The tea's caffeine was not strong enough to keep her from drifting into a fitful sleep. Morning Realities Vivian awoke late the next morning, she was groggy and stiff. The morning light shone brightly through her window. For a moment she had forgotten about the day prior, until she looked down toward her feet. Vivian's eyes bugged out when they set upon her giant tits as they heaved up and down with each concerned breath. She normally kept her house at a slightly chilly temperature while she slept and it was clear through the thin sheet that her large nipples objected to the chill. “Oh god! It was real!” She said after sitting up. After awkwardly using the restroom and donning her robe once again she went downstairs. She brewed some coffee and sat at the kitchen bar. She parted the top of her robe and looked intensely at her new assets. Vivian always considered herself calm during a crisis and this was no exception. A very personal crisis yes but not one she could overcome. “Ok, this is obviously very real and not going away. Something happened yesterday, ” she said while pacing around her kitchen. “Yesterday was normal until, until; the sunscreen!” Vivian hurried to the back patio. The bottle in question was on the ground. She picked it up and examined it closely. There was nothing on the bottle to lead her to think it was anything but ordinary sunscreen. Brand New You! Read the label, strange, Vivian didn't remember buying this brand, or if she had ever heard of it before. A slight breeze brought a sudden chill up and under her robe and she quickly retreated back inside. She decided that she might as well get dressed and plan her next move. “Damnit, none of my tops fit!” she said, frustrated. A decent pile of clothes had grown on her bed and she stood topless and feeling nearly defeated. The cool air and increased sensitivity kept her enlarged nipples hard, her recent wrestling match with her now too small shirts didn't help matters either. She was tempted to rub out a quickie on top of the clothes pile but fought the urge. She rifled almost desperately through her closet once more before noticing one top that had fallen off its hanger and was crumpled on the floor in the corner. It was a red button up blouse with white floral patterns. She had bought it ages ago and accidentally picked a couple sizes too big and forgot to return it. She was thankful for that memory lapse now, even though it was a bigger size Vivian struggled to button the front and had to compress her huge tits to fit. The blouse was stretched and gaps could be seen between the buttons that threatened to pop off. Vivian was now scared to take a deep breath lest she ruin the only outfit that sort of fit. She cautiously made her way downstairs with the intent of researching the sunscreen online. She didn't quite make it to her office when the doorbell rang. “Oh not now.” she said. Vivian hoped that whoever it was would leave or maybe it was a delivery person dropping off a package and leaving. She waited a couple minutes before the bell rang again. “Go away!” she shouted towards the door. Knock knock knock! Whoever it was would not give up. Vivian slowly walked to the door and brushed the curtains that covered the thin windows that flanked the door aside. To her surprise, and slight arousal, it was Derek. Brian & Rachel, and the backstory on enhancement treatments. Life for Brian would never be the same after that fateful night with Rachel a few months earlier. His best friend, Josh, introduced Brian to Rachel, his sister, when she came back home one night. Rachel gave Brian his best (and first) sexual experience of his life. She was different from before. Brian always knew she had a very large ass, his eyes worked and she wasn't afraid to flaunt it either. He had been living in her family's house for several months. They had an extra basement bedroom and knew Brian's home life was terrible. It was her family's generosity that helped him finish high school and start community college courses, it most likely kept him from following the wrong path of substance abuse and crime, which his parents took. For this, he was eternally grateful and tried to make up for it by at least helping around the house since they refused to allow him to pay rent. So Brian and Rachel were well acquainted. She was very attractive, and Brian frequently masturbated to her photos, but he never made any move. That is why he was taken by absolute surprise that special night. Josh had gone to sleep early and Brian stayed up to finish his video game's current quest. Rachel had other ideas, she came down the basement stairs, on the prowl for him. And that is where it got even more incredible for him. The already ample ass of Rachel seemed to be much bigger than the last he had seen her. His first thoughts in the whirlwind was that she had some kind of surgery done, and was showing off her ‘assets'. He had known that Rachel and her friend Tina were webcam girls, they were excellent at giving him fresh fap material and he was all too happy to pay the subscription each month. He had known Tina through Rachel for a couple years as well. At least he knew her before the webcam site. Now her tits had ballooned to outrageous, almost cartoonish proportions. There weren't many porn stars that came close to her size. Another unbelievable person was the guy they fucked in their shows, he didn't know who he was, but his cock; his cock was gigantic. Two feet long and thick as a soda can in the first videos and it was even bigger later on. Their popularity camgirl website grew in the expansion fetish community though everyone agreed that the huge cock was fake. What no one could agree on was if it was a well-made prosthetic, or some kind of special effects. Brian was a part of the prosthetic camp, at least until she came downstairs that night. Rachel produced some normal looking pills for him to take. Tina's mega tits, her giant ass, the monster cock guy; was all because of experimental pills. She didn't say how she came across them and he was too horny and enamored to care right then. She told him before he swallowed two of them that these were new fast acting, but temporary ones. She wasn't lying and a minute later Brian's average penis had grown from 5 inches to a 9 inch hog that Rachel milked dry for most of the night. She left the next day, leaving him with the rest of the cock pills. He tried to hold out and wait to use them for the next time she came back. He never before thought of himself as having an expansion fetish, it all seemed too much in the fantasy realm, he needed something more grounded in reality. But now it was real, and he experienced it firsthand, and he couldn't get enough. Now the bottle of pills taunted him, watching the web show with Rachel, Tina, and then some older woman, also with huge tits, was too much to bear. He stuck with the proper dosage instructions and only used the pills once a day. Jacking off with a 9 inch cock was incredible to say the least. His supply began to run out so he texted Rachel and a few days later a sizable box arrived with more cock pills Unbeknownst to Brian, his daily use of the pills had their toll as well. One morning he woke up to discover his morning wood pitching a taller tent than it should have. His cock hadn't reverted back to its normal size. He spent the entire day hiding from Rachel and Josh's mom Olivia, jacking off at least a dozen times. By the end of the day he was beyond spent. His erection was still stubbornly huge. There was nothing Brian could do but learn to live with the lingering effects of his overindulgence. His penis was permanently large, and the other side effects of heightened libido and having massive loads of cum weren't going away either. Fortunately he was able to hide his new endowment with baggy enough pants. Everything was going well for Brian once he learned how to effectively hide the salami in his pants. Rachel would come back every now and again, fuck his brains out; then leave. He didn't mind though. It was still sort of surreal that there really were pills that could enlarge people. He never really had an expansion fetish before, but now he loved every bit of it. And as far as he knew, Rachel's brother Josh and their mother Olivia had no idea. It was smooth sailing, at least up until, what Rachel dubbed, “The incident” To be continued… By Bearclaw88 for Literotica.

Cáel  Defeats The Illuminati: Part 19The Great Hunt.Book 3 in 19 parts, By FinalStand. Listen to the ► Podcast at Explicit Novels.‘The Hunt is never an easy thing because in the Wild there are things which hunt the hunters'September 11th: First Day Of The Great HuntCentral ArgentinaFelix was still nursing his hurt hand when I came back from my Ishara-space."Well?" he smirked."Plenty of good news," I smirked right back from the place where I had dropped when Felix had cold-cocked me. "Suffice it to say the weather on the final day will be in our favor ~ no more precise answer than that from the goddess SzélAnya ~ plus our horses will not throw us, or give away our position. That's from the Goddess Epona by the way.""Finally, the Goddess Ishara will be watching over us and our travails... she will send omens to warn us of hunters closing in as well as talk to me in my dreams. Apparently she doesn't want me; us; to shame her in this contest so is taking this competition seriously. Mind you, this means the other goddesses will be taking this contest seriously as well, so we have our work cut out for us again.""What is Ishara the Goddess of again?" the teased me."Oaths, love and medicine," I repeated my answer."Fine," the grinned, "is there any goddess in my corner?""None that bothered talking to me," I snorted. "Want me to knock you out and see what you can see?""Nah... I'm Felix Melena. I work better alone.""You mean in alone in a team of two, right?""Yeah; a team of four actually, Nyilas. Don't forget our mounts," Felix motioned to our two horses.I was ecstatic because they had brought Peppermint down from 'Summer Camp' for this romp through the Pampas. To me she was the perfect mare for this endeavor.Felix had been gifted with a spirited gelding named 'Thunderbolt'; 'Rayo' in Spanish. He was a black haired beast with white sox and a white diamond on his forehead. Felix had wanted a stallion, but the Horse-mistresses of Epona had nixed that choice as highly impractical for a horse-virgin such as himself. I had to agree as stallions had far too much spirit and the likelihood of one making noise when it smelled an unknown mare was far too high... so a gelding it was.Not that an 'unknown' mare was that much of a possibility. See, we had been put down where the other thirty huntresses would also be starting from; a makeshift corral our host Freehold had put together as the entrance to some 'badlands' in which the hunt would be taking place. There ten Amazons; with their own mounts; manned the place, fed the horses and made sure no one cheated out of the starting gate.We had our 24 hours head start on our pursuers, but that didn't turn out to be the huge edge we thought it would be. We were given the first part of our map... which led to the area we would find our second part of our map... and so on until sometime late Saturday night, or Sunday morning, we would find the final part of our map which would direct us to where our extraction point would be.We were to be extracted at Noon; not sunset as we had originally been told; on Sunday. Actually, anytime between ten minutes before to ten minutes after... so fair this was not seeing as we were novice outdoorsmen. Still, those were the rules we were given so off we went early Thursday morning. In the truest Amazon fashion, this was to be a contest which required the utmost skill and endurance to win.Heading out, Felix and I were deciding on what the enemy strategy, or strategies, would be. We figured some would start by simply trailing us seeing as how they were better both at tracking as well as doing so from horseback. The second group would follow a different, but equally difficult 'Treasure Hunt' toward our final point of extraction and wait for us there.I reminded Felix that neither he nor I nor any of the Amazons would be riding our horses to death, or even injury, because that wasn't the Amazon way. Such callous disregard for one's mount wasn't in them and we had to follow that dictum, or suffer irreparable harm to our own 'honor' should we do so and somehow win. Doing so and losing... we decided to not even go there.This also meant we had to take time for our horses to graze and find water for them to drink along the way. After getting that lecture, Felix wondered out loud if it wouldn't be a better idea for us to let our horses loose and 'hoofing' it ourselves seeing as how the Amazons would also have to follow the same horse etiquette. I had to remind him reluctantly how much faster horses could travel. Horses were the way to go.The difference was there was no rapid charging across the landscape with the Sun at our backs as we headed out. No, we took it at a steady trot until we hit our first terrain feature; a steady gradient cut in the side of a canyon which had been created over the millennia by the forces of wind and rain. Down we went. Our horizon sunk down until all we had were the walls of the canyon.Our map directed us to take this route to the first 'treasure horde', whatever that was. By the way we were moving and how the Sun slowly crawled up above us; recall it was almost 'spring' down under; we figure we were making good progress toward our first target... which we located without too much hassle around noon.It was a Bonanza! Not for us, but for the horses. We had four bags of grain for our mounts. We humans received some sort of indescribable jerky (since it was probably not human we decided to eat it... later [it turned out to be the local flightless bird and it tasted like chicken jerk jerky too!]). There was also the second part of our map which led us farther out into the wilderness. Off we went.Third Treasure Trove.By evening we had found our third treasure trove. The second had contained two compasses and two hatchets (Yippee!). The third had contained two sections of twenty-five meter rope and some flint and tinder so we could start a fire. Felix was all for this as it was butt-numbing cold already and we were damn tired from a day full of riding.We compromised by creating a banked fire. We also decided to sleep instead of pushing on. It was pretty dark outside even with the three-quarters Moon above. We definitely didn't want to walk our mounts into something which could bring them up lame this early in the contest. I assured Felix we couldn't abandon them and leading them would be torture. Essentially we would be disqualified.I won the compass toss and got to sleep the first part of the night. Felix woke me around Moon-set and then I kept watch; there were predators about, or so we believed; until sunrise. Then we ate the last of the jerky, fed and watered our mounts then head out once more. This time our hearts began to hammer within their cages and every noise had sinister implications.See, the Amazons are cheating bitches of all cheating bitches and could have started after us at 12:01 last night and pushed on following our trail through the night. Being expert horsewomen and spectacular trackers they could do shit like that. We, their prey, had to be clever in other ways. What those ways were weren't relatively apparent though.Maybe Pamela could show up and, after slapping me upside my head, give me a clue. No Pamela arrived though so we were on our own. Shortly after the Sun crested the canyon walls; we kept to the canyons just in case; we came across the fourth 'trove'... and it was chilling. We received two binoculars and some more jerky (it was to be our lunch). The binoculars were the chilling part because if WE had some then most likely the Amazons behind us had some as well.Also, the way from our fourth treasure to out fifth put us in the horns of a dilemma. We could either cut over the sides of the canyon to where the fifth treasure trove/map was, or keep to the canyon and travel three times the distance. After a quick discussion followed by some 'rock-paper-scissors' (complete with a prayer to Dot Ishara), I won, so up and over the side we went.To reduce the size of our silhouette, we dismounted and led our horses across the... and stumbled across a herd of cattle; Sweet Mother Ishara! We moved through the herd, waved to the accompanying Amazon gaucho, and went on our way. Felix muttered something about my 'dumb' luck. He-he-he-he-he... We talked to the gaucho, turned on the charm and convinced her to not tell any of our pursuers we had come by this way.She was like nineteen years old and I could tell really took a shine to Felix... so he promised to come back and visit her the moment he won the contest. After we departed her and her track-erasing herd of cattle, I pulled him aside."You had better keep that promise to that girl. If you don't, she and her kinfolk will hunt your ass down and tag you like a mule deer in the Yellowstone," I cautioned him."I know. I know," he grinned. "These are some crazy ass bitches. Besides, being the lone male in a freehold of women has its own appeal."I thought we were in safe territory again when Felix finally asked that doom-laden question."Cáel , where have all their dudes gotten off to?"'Oh shit', I mused. How much of the truth could Felix handle?"I'm only telling you this because I like you," I said then took a deep breath. "They sold them to the Nine Clans... they are a bunch of assassins.""Really?" he studied me. Like he was going to catch me in a lie after four years of dating the most dangerous game on this Earth; girlfriends."Really. Where do you think they get those legion of ninja and combat fighters from? Sure their life expectancy isn't what we have, but it is much better than they would have if they stayed home." There was some part of the truth in that."That seems... short-sighted.""What do you think guys like us are for? Now they won't have to kidnap local passer-byers for weeklong orgies.""How come words has never gotten out about this?" Felix was relentless."It has from time to time, but Havenstone makes sure such reports are relegated to the realm of tabloids and UFO aficionados. If that doesn't work, they bribe some people to bury the story. If that doesn't work, they kill some people.""Now that I believe," Felix nodded."That they kill people to keep their secrets?""Absolutely. They look like the kind of girlfriend who wouldn't be happy unless she burns your balls before your eyes after you break up.""How succinct," I nodded back."So, are we ever going to see Khalid, Trent, or Brian again?""Sure... they are only being kept prisoners and milked of their seeds... but I can arrange for you go to go meet them if you really want to," I offered."No thanks," Felix shook his head then grinned. "They washed out while only you and I remain. Let me find them on my own and get some sort of permission from Ms. Love (Katrina) first. I thought Khalid was kind of cool and Trent was the kind of brother I could invite out for a beer, or ten.""Not Brian?""Brian was too invested in himself and his weevil-ing ways. I couldn't trust him at my back, or with my girl. Mind you, I wouldn't trust you with my girl either, but we are otherwise okay.""Smart move. I have exceedingly low impulse control around the ladies plus an over-developed libido.""Yeah," he smiled my way. "I'd trust you in a knife fight, but not with someone I loved. You are way too smooth, Nyilas. Way too smooth.""What brought that revelation on?""Ms. Lee (Brooke). Normally I can mend any fence with any girl I come across, but not with her after she'd been with you. I admire that," he studied me."So, are you and Gene going to be a regular thing?""Yeah. I think so. I still expect me to be getting plenty of tail at Havenstone once I win this thing, but having a less-lethal girl on the outside wouldn't suck either."So much like me... I admired that about the guy."Once we win, don't ya mean?""Sure thing, Nyilas," he chuckled. "I figure it helps me to help you across the finish line. The better standing you end up in the better an ally you make back at work.""That reminds me; Katrina told me they are going to spin this; your participation in this inaugural Great Hunt is that all sins are forgiven; yadda, yadda, yadda. Thus you still walking around Havenstone being the bad boy you are.""Clever lady and always thinking ahead. Is she seeing anybody?""No, and dude, you don't want to go there. She is far too clever by half to fall for any of our reindeer games. She scares me," I cautioned him."All the more reason to pursue her," he snorted."Go for it," I shrugged. Hey, I'd warned the guy."What about that blonde number I saw you with... Elsa was it?"Oh, he knew exactly who Elsa was, but he was acting all nonchalant about his treatment at her hands."Yeah. Elsa. What about her?""Is she in your stable?""Nope. Not really," I shrugged. "Going after her too?""Oh, definitely.""Good luck with that," I sighed. He'd learn the hard way."There is something you are not telling me.""Yeah. She has the hots for me. Wants to own me... and not in a good way.""Oh... is that your way of cautioning me to be wary of her?""Most definitely. Elsa is one scary lady and she already knows who and what we both are.""What are we?" he was eyeballing me again."Hunters on the prowl. Guys who like a challenge. In your case, the guy who only wants the best. I'm more of an omnivore.""You mean you are a man-slut," he snorted."Got me," I chuckled."So, you think she's out of my league?""No. I think she is Katrina's friend and Katrina sees right through both of us. Elsa might not have those interpersonal skills, but she's twice as lethal. Trust me on that; I've fought her.""How tough was she?""Beat me black and blue then choked me out because I wouldn't surrender.""Oh... I'd like to get her on the mats.""Good luck with that then. Become a 'Runner' and there is even more I can tell you about her. Right now it is all simply in-house stuff.""Corporate confidentiality details, eh? Executive Services purview and stuff like that. Man, I was wrong to look down on your branch of service. I apologize.""Why thank you. I honestly never thought I'd get a sincere apology from you.""I can be wrong once in your lifetime," Felix laughed, "and I'm man enough to admit it.""Oh... and thanks for the sim-cards. They helped me get off that deserted atoll.""No problem. That was Katrina's idea though.""Well, you got them to us so surreptitiously the Chinese suspected nothing.""Don't you mean those rogue Albanians?""Yeah... them too," I laughed along with him."I think we can be friends, Nyilas," he grinned."I think so too. I didn't think so originally. On the first day you and the others treated me like the country bumpkin, but now I think you see me as a survivor... just like you.""Precisely. You know I had the option of leaving Havenstone... no matter how this affair turns out.""And you didn't take it? Who offered you this opportunity anyway?""Katrina.""It might have been a ruse," I warned him. "These bitches don't play fair.""I took that into account... but I love the challenge of this place. It is like no other work environment on Earth. Challenges every day, hot women all around, and the chance to risk my life on a monthly basis. Screw regular corporate America. I've found the place where I belong."Felix sounded so enthusiastic. I hoped he understood the fate he was embracing. I also hoped he found a niche in Havenstone which allowed him to live out his life... hopefully a long, long life. Maybe I should warn him about the 'cliffs'? Perhaps once we had won and were safely back in Havenstone's motherly embrace.Hiding.Fortune favored us backtracking from our seventh treasure trove; our dinner and more grain for the horses. A few birds flew up out of the brush ahead of us. I took that as a sign from Ishara."Felix," I hissed. "Hide!"We looked around and found a draw away from the main canyon floor for us to slink into. I used some brush to cover our side tracks then ran back to cover.No sooner had I gotten there than two Amazons came trotting past us. The lead one was Svetlana Inara and she was tracking us from the saddle. The second one was Beatrice Astarte who was scanning the environment as they moved together following our trail up this vein of the canyon. As soon as they were around the next corner of the vein, Felix and I mounted up and raced down the other way.The sand floor covered our hoof-falls and we had to go that way anyway. We had barely covered the distance to the next draw when we spotted two more Amazons following our earlier trail this way. We had Two Amazon parties on our trail and it wasn't even Friday night yet! This group spotted us and gave chase. They must have ridden their horses hard to get this far because we quickly left them in our dust.This allowed us to slow down a bit and deviate over to where the eight 'treasure' was. Our map had us going back down his particular draw which I thought was most unwise, so we went over the lip of the draw dismounted and led our horses at a rapid run; for us humans; across the greater landscape. Thank SzélAnya, a late afternoon rainstorm fell upon us as we dropped down into the next vein of the canyon before the pursuing Amazons crested the draw we had exited.We walked through the rain until the sun set then debated what to do next. We were going to need light to figure out where the eighth treasure was at; they were all somewhat hidden. We had to keep moving no matter what because we doubted the Amazons on our asses were going to let up. We decided when we got close to the eighth treasure horde I would do the searching while Felix stood watch on the entrance to the draw.Using a hatchet I cut off a branch from a bush and set it alight so I could see what I was doing. It took me twenty long minutes to figure out where the treasure was hidden... night-vision goggles and the map to the ninth map piece. Gleefully, I went back down to where Felix was except... no Felix. Oh Shit! I slipped back and put on my night-vision goggles, got a hatchet at the ready and returned, scanning about.I spotted one Amazon... she was Carla Nemain... and I recalled her being teamed with Ella Mielikki. Anyway, I tried to sneak up on Carla and it almost worked. At the last moment the cloud cover cleared and the three-quarters Moon revealed me. She spun on me with twin fighting sticks while I tried to brain her with the flat side of my hatchet.Yours truly took two punishing blows to his ribs while only clipping her with my hatchet. Still, the blow appeared to cause her to stumble so I pressed my advantage. I knocked one of her two sticks out of her hand then missed twice. I thought I heard someone coming up hard behind me. Well... fuck!"What do you have?" Carla grumbled. "Are you trying to kill me?"I kept silent, pulling out my second hatchet and pressing my luck a little further. I disarmed her and then hammered her down with a hatchet to the top of her skull. Down she went. I spun around just in time to see Ella Mielikki coming at me with a lasso. She launched it a second too late and I was able to bat it aside. She drew her honor blade and kept coming though."Ella... I have two hatchets. This is not a fight you can win," I addressed her."You won't kill me," she kept advancing."Of course not. We are sisters, but I can do... this!" and I attacked her with the flat ends of my twin hatchets. I so had her too... or I would have had I had the extra moment to ensure Carla was unconscious.She wasn't. She jumped me from behind then Ella rushed in from the front and I went down in a tangle of arms, legs and torsos. I was doing surprisingly well wrestling them both despite the odds until Ella put her knife against my throat."Give up," she panted. "You have been captured. Admit it!""I surrender," I sighed then relaxed my body. My two hatchets dropped to the ground."Let's bind him up too," Carla grinned. They proceeded to tie my hands behind my back then my legs together. Then then gave each other a celebratory 'high-five'. Then came their pillaging of our loot. They especially loved our night vision goggles and the grain for 'their' horses. They abandoned our horses, put loose nooses around our necks and began riding off down the canyon, their horses feeding on the grain in feedbags... and there was a suitably humbled Felix...To do so they had to untie our legs, but they compensated for that by tying our elbows together behind our backs as well as our hands. It was a rather painful affair. All in all, our captors were quite triumphant. After a while, I decided to speak."So, how did you catch us so fast?" I asked Carla. She had my noose."I prayed to Nemain and then picked a compass point and rode that way. We came across your path and followed you here."So you weren't the group following us from the afternoon?""No... you were being followed?""Yes... by two groups... both of whom tracked us from the beginning," I sighed."Ella," Carla addressed her companion. "We had better get a move on. There are four others on our track.""Damn it," Ella grumbled. "You take both males. I'll double back and start masking our trail. You pick a different compass point and I'll catch up.""Okay. Come here," Carla accepted Felix's noose from Ella. "We are going... north by northwest."Ella doubled back and was soon out of sight. Carl took the next draw she came across and kept up a steady walking pace. As a matter of safety, she didn't wrap our tethers around her saddle horn on the off chance her horse took off. We could be dragged to death of we were attached to the horse. So, we had a momentary advantage... and took it.I spotted Felix counting down with his fingers behind his back. I spotted him at '4'. I rapidly signaled '3', he went to '2' and I finished up with '1' then we lunged backwards trying to pull her off her horse. With my luck, she tumbled down on Felix's side, horse rearing up. I ran for it, quickly pulling my noose along with me. I heard Carla and Felix cursing behind me.It was gut-check time. I could abandon Felix or attempt to double back and help him with only my legs because my hands were behind my back."Fuck it," I cursed silently as I doubled back. In the forefront of my mind was the notion Felix would come back for me if the roles were reversed. In I charged.Felix was standing, trying to use his martial arts kicks to keep her at bay.He was also absorbing the majority of her concentration because; again; she didn't notice me until I was right on top of her. I put a shoulder into her diaphragm, taking her down and knocking her knife out of her hands. Felix didn't waste a moment giving her as snap-kick to the cranium... knocking her out. I picked up the knife and backed up toward my partner.First I had to saw through his elbow bonds and then his bound hands to free him. This all took precious time. I had just freed him when Carla began moaning. Felix looked to me then to the horse."Go," I urged him on. "Go to the next site and then double back for me. You know which way they will be heading and it is you on horseback versus two of us who aren't."He gave me a quick nod of the head then jumped into the saddle... and almost spilled himself over the other side, but then was off like a flash. I ran off in the other direction. Of course with the minimal lighting and my arms tied behind my back I didn't expect to get too far, but what realistic choice did I have. I certainly wasn't going to give up, damn it.[The Politics Of Not Playing Fair]In hindsight, knowing the Amazons were cheating bitches of cheating bitches, I should have tried to cheat more, but I ended up thinking too much about the male version of honor and not enough about winning. Thankfully, others were much more invested in me winning than that. Add to this and I had family I really hadn't counted on seeing things that way.And then there was the Sanctity of the Contract to consider... which I clearly hadn't, though the opportunity to do so was right there all along.As I was fleeing for my life I caught sight of one person running past me to my right and another to my left as a third slammed into me and took me down. For an instance I was thinking 'now they are operating in groups of four!' then the clothing of the three entered my consciousness. They weren't dressed like Amazons. Their camouflage was all wrong unless you were deliberately trying to hide in this environment.The only people I knew who would do something like that without a plethora of modern weapons being evident; thus being the Seven Pillars; were the Ninja![in Japanese] "Hey there, are you looking for me?"[in Japanese] "Yes we are, Ishara-sama," a feminine voice answered. "Where is your companion? We are supposed to make a good faith effort to save them as well.""Wait... who hired you?""Well, it is supposed to be something of a secret so tell no one, but it was your brother," she replied in thickly accented English. With a few flashes of steel in the moonlight and I was a free Amazon once more."Were did the other two go?""Covering your tracks and laying out a few nuisance traps to confuse the two following you.""Your body feels... awfully familiar," I hazarded conversation of another sort."I am Miyako's older sister; and married. Happily so though I have been repeatedly reminded of your... horn-dog status. It is 'horn-dog' correct?""Yeah," I sighed. "That's me. Let's go find Felix before he gets hopelessly lost."By this time the other two had made it back to us, expertly covering my tracks; they were not leaving any; because, you know, they were ninjas. By the looks of things it must have seemed I flew away because I had simply vanished as well. I wish I could have hung around long enough to see the looks of consternation on the pursuing Amazons' faces, but I had real work to take care of."So basically, my Brother, the Great Khan, has hired three ninja to help me win," I whispered as we made our getaway into the moonlit darkness."Oh no," I could have sworn she smiled, "There are seven of us. We each have other tasks to perform, be it carry extra equipment, or scouting ahead to make sure we don't bump into any more of your girlfriends.""They are not my girlfriends... yet... maybe," I shrugged."Don't make me hit you," she whispered back. "I will hit you if you cheat too much on my little sister. She is so impressionable you know.""Oh... boy," I groaned. A protective older sister while I was on a time table. "Is all of your team female?" I asked instead."Yes. When dealing with our allies the Amazons it was considered the diplomatic thing to do. Now we most move like the autumn breeze over the grass, Ishara-sama.""Please, call me Cáel . What's your name?""Not something I can reveal while on a mission. My name in the team is 'First' as I am the team leader.""I could call you Hatsuyuki," I kept going. Hatsuyuki meant 'First Snow'. We were angling in a different direction suggesting to me we had come across Felix's path and were racing to catch him."I will help you out a bit," she chuckled ever so slightly. "Every woman on the team is a sister, or sister-in-law of Miyako, so we have all heard the tales of your exploits and been suitably warned by Grandmother to not fall for your... reindeer games.""Wow... cut off at the knees before even leaving the starting gate," I frowned."Please concentrate on the task at hand Ishara-sama," she whispered then, "Four more ahead of us. I swear they must have some sort of divine assistance as well.""Cheating bitches of all cheating bitches," I quietly cursed. Hatsuyuki put her hand over my mouth despite the low volume of my words.I risked a peek. It was fucking Elsa and Rachel and they were having a pow-wow with Tormé Maeve and Parul Nammu. By the rules of the Great Hunt, no Amazon could subdue, or otherwise hinder any other Amazon; as long as they didn't have a male. Then all bets were off. After a while the two teams flipped a coin and departed in different ways... which were eerily close to our actual track.The moment they were safely away, we took off once more at a steady jog. Mind you, I was in pretty damn good shape... and these little ninja babes were threatening to run me into the ground such was their stamina. The big thing was breath control. We had to be prepared to be utterly still at a moment's notice. Every Amazon around us was as hunter of some sort, be it of big game, or of humans.Even with their precautions we found ourselves being tracked by Daryna Šauška and Yatta Oxóssi within the hour. Exactly what they were tracking wasn't known to me and was a source of consternation to the Ninja. It was impossible to outrun horse-bound foes at our current pace and if we moved faster, the odds of our enchantment failing would drastically increase."Fuck!" I hissed."What?" Hatsuyuki made brief eye contact then scanned around for whatever threat I might have detected."They are tracking the magic of the enchantment," I enlightened her."Are you sure?""Alal; my Grandfather is," I held her eyes this time. "Honestly, I was going through the Rolodex of my mind when this thought occurred to me. I think it was a mystic rite the Egyptians invented millennia ago, but he knows it.""What is the counter?""I don't know," I sighed, "but I do know your movement is leaving a magical trail behind which glows like the failing light of a sunset to the searcher."Hatsuyuki whispered some arcane words which my ears failed to focus on while making several complicated hand gestures. She gave me one head nod then we took off, jogging in another direction though still angling to intercept Felix. I noticed the change immediately. Dry grass crackled beneath our feet and standing grass bent at our passage. I was the worst offender without a doubt.Later when we stopped for a break, 'Three' returned to tell us the followers had initially been confused by the loss of the spell energy betraying us, but then they dismounted and began tracking us on foot; slower yet still a persistent menace."New plan," I decided. "We set an ambush for them.""We can't do that, Cáel ," Hatsuyuki informed me. "We are forbidden to directly confront our foes."My mind barely hesitated in its skullduggery."But if I confront them, could you steal their horses?""Yes," she grinned once more, or so I thought. "Then set up a field of simple traps with a path I can maneuver through so I can lose them once I have their undivided attention. Can you do that?""Yes," and another smile."Let's get on it," I grinned back. I could tell she was warming up to me. After all, I wasn't pressuring her to save me, or violate her Contract. Instead I was thinking on my feet and utilizing what they were best at to avoid my enemies.[in Japanese] "Team, here is what we must do," Hatsuyuki gathered her girls together and laid out what they needed to accomplish.Twenty minutes later, the ambush was set and the two ladies walked right into it. Apparently the idea I would fight back so aggressively hadn't occurred to them. I smashed straight into Daryna first, knocking her down and running past her. Instinctively she jumped up, cursing me even as she gave chase. For an instance Yatta hesitated, considering mounting up and giving chase, or pursuing on foot. Rapidly riding a horse even in this partially moonlit night was risky so she decided to join Daryna on foot as I raced away. She did grab her lasso first though. Seeing as Daryna was following in my footsteps, it was Yatta who stumbled into the first series of traps, spraining her ankle in the process.Hearing that, I took a quick detour, allowing Daryna to catch up if she cut crossways in her pursuit. Predictably she did so and crashed into her own series of traps while I continued to beat feet out of there. As Daryna untangled herself from the 'spider web' trap; really just a tangle of silk strings; she heard the horses neigh and then take off. The ninja had exploded smoke bombs in the horses' faces to accomplish this feat.By the time Daryna stood up, I was long gone in the foot race. She carefully picked her way back to Yatta, helped her up and then worked her way back to find their saddles cut loose and packs set aside... and their horses long gone as well. From what 'Five' related to us later, Daryna elected to take after their lost steeds while Yatta treated her sore ankle. 'Five' didn't hang around to see how long it took Daryna to return with their mounts. The rest of us had successfully slipped away by that time.Reunited.By the time we had reunited with Felix he had already discovered our next Treasure Trove; more grain, a compass and a map of the whole region. Woot! We still only had one mount until an hour past sunrise when our two steeds came trotting into our brief camp. Now we had three horses. We elected to release Carla's mount to find its way back to her mistress... eventually, we hoped."Care to explain the entourage?" Felix joked."Somebody who is somebody loves me," I shrugged. "I can't tell you who though. I've been sworn to secrecy.""Damn... five female ninja. We have got to not waste this opportunity.""I am so onboard with that plan," I grinned, "but it going to be tough. Most of the only speak Japanese and they are all related to a girl I've already knocked up.""So they all know what a stud you are, Cáel ," Felix laughed. "Give it time and they'll be begging for it. I know the type. Fit, but silent with minimal social skills. They want to know all about how you seduced their sister, cousin, what have you.""God, I hope so," I groaned. "All this abstinence is driving me crazy.""Me too," he chuckled. "Me too."Oh, what we had planned was horribly irresponsible. We had the inaugural First Great Hunt to win for all Mankind after all. Still, it took only three elements to be effective; a stream, river, or lake of some kind to bathe in; to convince the ninja we had to take a bath to remove any scent the Amazons who captured us may have sprayed on us; and the ninjas' willingness to believe such an outlandish excuse to get naked. Once they saw us naked nature would take its course.Well, despite our awesome masculine arsenals... we got nowhere. The ninja babes didn't buy our excuses, blew away our pseudoscientific ramblings (pheromones don't work that way, they insisted) and seriously; we didn't really have the time. So while putting our shirts back on and then going for our boots, two more Amazons came our way. We barely had the warning time to seek cover when Elsa and Rachel came riding down the stream, looking each way for any signs of us.Thanks to our horses remaining perfectly still as well, they gradually moved past our hidey-holes and out of our view. The second the ninjas gave us the 'all clear' we hurriedly finished dressing then headed off in a different direction. The last two Amazons I wanted to confront were Elsa and Rachel. I liked Rachel too much and quite frankly was too afraid of Elsa.Once more we risked using some Ninja Magics to aid our passage through a light, early morning rain. This one put off a confusing area of tracks which were both difficult to follow; Amazons were no dummies; and included our chosen pathway to the next treasure trove. Shortly after an overcast noontime Sun, we hunkered down for a few hours and took a short nap.I would have liked to sleep longer, but according to the two ninja who had stood watch, the whole area appeared to be crawling with Amazons out and about, mounted and dismounted and following our misleading trails, but still being close enough around to make traveling above the canyons frankly impossible. Felix and I had a meeting of the minds with Hatsuyuki.Sending two Ninja off on our steeds wouldn't work because at least one group of the opposition had our binoculars and none of the Ninja could pass for us under such scrutiny. In fact, we couldn't come up with a single plan which guaranteed us a chance to move about unseen. So, we came up with a crazy plan instead. I would take off on Peppermint in an elliptical path meant to draw off as many Amazons as possible.It had to be me because a few of the Amazons might not pursue Felix if he tried the same stunt, focusing on capturing Ishara first... so Ishara had to be the one to play decoy. We shook hands, hugged then scouted around for the best opportunity for me to make a bolt for it... then off I went. What the Ninja planned to do wasn't revealed to us though I had a feeling they weren't enamored with my plan.Peppermint and I came out of the closest draw and set off with a meandering gate; we would need all the speed she could muster soon enough. Unthinkingly, I had also stumbled across an added bonus to my plan. Me and my dumb luck. See, all the Amazons anywhere close to me at the start had been pressing their mounts hard for a day and a half now plus hadn't spent any time last night sleeping whereas me and Peppermint were relatively well fed and watered as well as well rested.Still, my initial sense was that I was simply fucked. All across the plain, Amazons noted my presence within a minute and began moving to hem me in. I imagine once I was unmounted and bound, the grand melee to see who would claim me would begin. I counted twelve of the fine ladies and while none were directly ahead of the direction I was heading in, some were far too close for me to hold out much hope.I didn't give up though. I wasn't in me and apparently it wasn't in Peppermint either. She picked up the pace instinctively when I leaned forward and off we went. Incrementally, all thirteen steeds picked up their speeds. I wasn't going to make it... and then it got worse. Coming out of a draw to my front-right was none other than Ella Mielikki.See appeared as surprised to see me as I was to see her, but that didn't last. She whipped out her lasso and spurred her mount to go faster. She was going to cut me off. I had no out in any other direction. All I had was a plain full of grass and thunderclouds in the distance; just too far away to do me any good.'Remember who you were...' came unbidden to my mind.I leaned forward and began whispering in Peppermint's ear in a language I did not know... but three thousand years ago it had been the language of horse peoples like the Scythians who taught it to their noble young... and so had another people long forgotten by history... the Medians. The words spilled out of me until all that was left was the final benediction; words that would bind man and mount together.[Median] "For Aya," I whispered.Remember who you were; wasn't meant for me. It was for the hundreds of Median steeds my Grandfather had ridden into battle... with his comrades-in-arms for over a thousand years two thousand years ago.Ella was whirling the lasso over her head. We were so close I could read the prayer to Mielikki on her lips as she strove to close those last few hoof-falls. The lasso flew through the air...Peppermint took off in a burst of speed utterly unlooked for. Her ghostly white plume rose majestically over her head; Grandfather's symbol... and now mine. The thunder of a hundred such steeds filled my ears with their power as we pulled away from the falling lasso... now less than a foot... too short. She had missed us and with that throw, passed the last chance the Amazons had to catch me.Rachel would later tell me they were all completely aghast at the pace Peppermint set as we rode past Mielikki, easily outdistancing her thus everyone else. We had escaped them and they knew it. They didn't know how and the looks of utter disbelief the Amazons behind me exchanged left them no doubt I had led them a merry chase only to vanish in a whirlwind of dust as I raced all the way into the storm-burst. Gone, gone, gone.Rachel told me she had then turned to Elsa and laughed heartily."I should have given him my honor blade," she chuckled, "because unlike the rest of you, I knew better.""But, what did he do?" Elsa had asked, truly curious and a bit frustrated."Just being Cáel ," Rachel had shaken her head as she replied. "Just being Cáel ."[Sunday]It was a thick, pounding rain as promised. No one could ride in this. Visibility was down to a few yards and the ground had turned into a morass. Only the greyness of the clouds betrayed the coming of day to us while our final treasure trove; a compass, map and coordinates for the rescue; pointed us in the proper direction... us and thirty Amazons.In our favor, the Ninja threw up a marching cordon around us so we didn't walk into any ambushes, and any Amazons not already at least even with us in the distance separating us from our evacuation point had a chance of catching us. Again, no Amazon worthy of their name would ride in weather like this and in a foot race, we men actually finally had the advantage.I wish I knew who was closest so I could plan accordingly. In strictly hand to hand combat, Felix and I had the advantage on over half those we were confronting. While most excelled at being hunters, beating up their prey with hands and knives wasn't normally their second best feature. No, they were fine combatants, just not in Felix's, or my, league.But then there were the Amazons like Tormé Maeve and Elsa Zorja who could kick our asses without a doubt, and planning how to fight them required a completely different game plan."What's on your mind?" Felix leaned in and shouted into my ear."This ain't over. Not only do we have to reach the evacuation site within a twenty minute window, we have to hope a half-dozen Amazons aren't waiting there for us."Felix nodded."Who is going to be the worst team?""Elsa and Rachel. I'm not sure I can beat Rachel and I'm damn sure I can't beat Elsa," I answered."Leave Elsa to me then. While I've never fought her before, she's also never fought me," he reasoned. "My best bet is an all-out offense; holding nothing back and hope I can outmuscle her before she pulls some surprise on me.""That's about right," it was my turn to nod.One of the Ninja came running back to us."There are two Amazons ahead of us going in the same direction. What do you want to do?"I looked to Felix who cracked his knuckles. He was right too. We didn't have enough time left to race around them; not in this mud; so jumping them and putting them down was our best bet.Bleeding.Our fists were bleeding, I had a knife wound on my left thigh, and Felix's nose was most likely broken, but we had put down two pairs of Amazons in the closing hour of the Great Hunt... and we were still free. We had even recorded the coordinates of where we left the four bound Amazons because leaving them all tied up in these conditions didn't seem fair.So far we had put down Niranjana Ereshkigal and Anna Cybele whose strategy was to figure out where the evacuation point was and then set up an ambush close by, and our old buddies, Tormé Maeve and Parul Nammu, who had been racing up to the evacuation point after some piece of divine intervention. They stumbled into us as we were binding up the first two.Thanks to the Ninja we had a moment's warning before they jogged right into us. It was on! Felix immediately challenged Tormé while I circled Parul, each seeking an advantage. Unfortunately, Tormé began cleaning Felix's clock so spun around and we switched partners."I wanted it to be me and you," she snarled."I was hoping to miss you entirely," I replied. She laughed and closed... and then slipped in the mud and slid right into my knee strike. Before she could clean the cobwebs from her head, I had landed three solid fist strikes to her jaw, rendering her incapable of immediate resistance; one tough chick! I quick glance back to Felix showed me he had Parul well in hand, so I quickly bound Tormé up and took her honor blade so she wouldn't be cutting herself free too soon.After we had Parul secured, Felix slapped me on the back and laughed."You bastard, I saw that," he chuckled. "She slipped.""I'll take it," I was unapologetic. Explaining to Felix how she was Katrina's #1 assassin would take too long. I'd leave it to Katrina to warn him how dangerous dating her would be.And then we heard the helicopter... and looked at our watches. It Was 11:48! We raced up the last bit of the slope to see the helicopter finish its descent. We'd made it... and then we saw Elsa and Rachel climbing up the slope beside us, disguised as we were by the downpour."Cáel !" Elsa screamed out my name. Rachel simply charged Felix wordlessly.I drew Tormé's honor blade and faced Elsa down. "Do you honestly think you can defeat me?" Elsa laughed. "Because Cáel , you cannot. You are already beaten, bruised and bleeding. Surrender and I promise to be gentle.""On any other day, I would agree with you, but this is not like any other day," I held my captured small knife out in a fighting stance."Today... today I have my Grandfather's knowledge and my Father's boundless spirit, Elsa. Today; you cannot defeat me. Come at me and find out, if you must." My stance flowed into an alien design... which came from a time when knives were the only close combat weapon anyone was lucky enough to have. My knife raised up over my head yet still pointing at my opponent while my empty left hand pointed at my foe.Then it occurred to me... if I could withstand the pain, I could grab her blade and hold it in place while I slashed down with my own ceremonial weapon. I could regenerate the damage; that was my edge and this was a fighting stance my Grandfather had perfected with that knowledge when all blades were either sharp stones, or smelted copper.I could see Elsa studying me rapid-quick before she made her lunge. It was so On! The first series of slashing strikes saw me barely missing having my hand cut open. I wasn't so lucky my second time around. Elsa sliced my ring finger to the bone."Damnit, Cáel !" Elsa snapped. "If you are going to fight me, at least use the training Pamela gave you. I have no idea what this crazy stance is supposed to show, but I think it is nothing more than your made-up style again. This time I am going to really hurt you if you don't surrender... Right Now!"Yeah, Elsa was upset she had to actually hurt me. I sensed that in her. Still, the pain quickly receded and I continued to stalk her... silently and with great determination on my face. No response was necessary and I was sure my quietude was unsettling her even more. On the next exchange Elsa moved so fast I couldn't track her blade. Still, I moved my empty palm across to stop her most likely angle of attack.I was wrong. By shifting my entire body to stop her slash, I put myself in the wrong positon; closing the distance between us and intercepting her surprise backslash with my left side at the kidney level. Ouch! Motherfucker! I grunted but used my positioning disadvantage as an advantage. As Elsa's hand recoiled from the dire wound she had given me, I reached out with my left hand and grabbed her wrist.My right hand came down attempting to slash her wrist in this exchange. She caught my right wrist in her left hand. Our bodies collided then my forward momentum slammed into her form and we both fell over. She rolled so we ended up crashing down on our sides, but I refused to release my hold while driving my blade ever downward.I didn't have much advantage over Elsa, but I was superior in upper body strength. It was my old buddy except coming out in my favor today. Slowly my blade inched toward its target."How... can... you... still... be... fighting?" Elsa ground out between her teeth."I am Ishara," was my reply. "The power of the goddess runs through me," I added a lie meant to confuse and dishearten her.She tried to break away by rolling around. I wouldn't let her. I tangled my legs up with hers until we were one conjoined mess. Then she surprised me with a head-butt right as the option was just occurring to me. She smashed my nose. There was blood everywhere, but I wouldn't relent on my hold. Instead, I followed up her head-butt with one of my own.Elsa caught mine with the hardest part of her forehead instead. Our skulls collided. I refused to feel the pain so while she was still reeling from that contact I smashed forward once again; this time impacting her temple and really shocking her. I had to have seemed like a monster to Elsa by this point in our bout; I could feel no pain and no infirmary would hold me back.Lacking every other point of leverage, she went for the 'Tried and True'; her knee impacted my precious gonads and for just that instance, my hold on her weakened. She broke free then rolled away."Stay down," she almost screamed at me. I didn't, instead rising up and resuming my archaic stance once more."This is going to hurt you a whole lot more than me," she promised next. Just then we both heard a titanic scream to my left. By the sound of the grunt which followed, I realized Felix had connected with one of his powerful kicks to Rachel's ribs. I used the positional advantage to charge. We collided once more, each one's opposite hand clamping down on the other's knife hand.While standing, we pushed each other back and forth, attempting kicks and foot stomps all the while my knife approached Elsa's collarbone. We were both too on guard for head-butts to pull one off this grapple, but I didn't need it... because we were in fact, grappling and I had a whole martial art devoted to grappling; Brazilian Jujutsu!I dropped Tormé's honor blade and flipped us around so I landed on top of her. Her blade drew a bloody line along my hip, but not enough damage to cause me any consternation. I could see it in her eyes, the moment we landed in the mud. She realized her mistake by allowing me too close, but the last time she had let that happened she had succeeded in stabbing me in the kidney, so she was taken off-guard for just that instance."Yeah," I chortled, "Just recalling my Brazilian Jujutsu aren't ya?""I can beat it," she ground out."You and an MMA Army," I growled back. She was in danger of having me roll her over... then it would be light's out!Right then Rachel and Felix came crashing down on the two of us, breaking my concentration and my hold. The four of us rolled up and separated once more.Rachel moved to Elsa's side while Felix helped me stand."We are running out of time," Felix informed me. We were. That appeared to be Rachel and Elsa's strategy all along. Keep us occupied for the remaining... eighteen minutes... damn was I out of breath and hurting."Switch," Felix tapped me on the forearm. "I got this."He didn't and he knew he didn't. For some god damn unknown reason, Felix was doing a selfless act for the first time in his life and I couldn't comprehend why."She'll destroy you," I pointed out."You're bleeding; badly," he stated, "and failing fast.""Listen to your friend," Rachel interjected herself into the conversation. Worse, she stepped aside and clearly indicated she would let me pass."Rachel!" Elsa snapped."He's earned it. For the past eighty-four days and then some, Cáel has earned; our respect," Rachel reminded us."Okay," I acknowledged the act of kindness. I moved behind Felix so he could screen me from Elsa... then shoved him as hard as I could across the muddy surface toward freedom. The look he sent back my way was priceless. Reluctantly, he looked back once then jogged to the helicopter and the rewards he deserved for surviving against so many for so long; just like me, but without the Goddesses and my troop of ruthless Amazon allies..."Two on one," I joked."No. I've surrendered my trophy," Rachel smile to me was emotionally crushing."Fine," Elsa nodded then, "Let's continue." This time I didn't have a knife.When we collided this time, she didn't hesitate to stab me in the left pectoral; above the heart, but not by much. I failed to catch her wrist and realized I was all out of game. My regeneration couldn't tackle both bleeding wounds and I was beginning to feel woozy.Elsa fell back."Surrender, Cáel ," her own voice had softened."Never surrender," I laughed back then I began to sway.This time as Elsa closed, she went for the grapple as well. I countered as best I could, but my reflexes were slowing down too. I wasn't going to make it then something tackled us both, slamming Elsa into my chest, stunning her."Felix... you came back," I groggily mumbled as Felix hammered Elsa hard, twice in the temple."You would come back for me. I see that now," he confessed. He half pulled, half-dragged me to our waiting chariot. The clock was a 'ticking."Rachel," I looked over to the other combatant. She hadn't started advancing on us like she should have."Go," she waved us away. "Today... today you have won your freedoms. Now go."What honors Rachel had passed over for whatever reasons were unknown to me. I was terrified she had done it out of love for me. Terrified because I felt so unworthy of such devotion and affection.Yet, Felix and I had made it and as the helicopter took off, I could sense the tension leave my body. My wounds were indeed healing and my blood supply, so witlessly spent was returning to me. Felix leaned into me as the nice Epona medic aboard our ride began to administer her traumatic injury training. I winced because it felt appropriate, not because I was allowed to feel any of the passing pain."You are a Runner now," I looked over to Felix. "Welcome aboard.""Sure thing, Ishara.""Ha," I chuckled. "Call me Cáel . You have earned that right.""I imagine there is something to that," he nodded. "Tell me what it is when you get the chance.""I will," I promised. "That and a few thousand other critically important things none one else will bother to teach you. As the saying goes, 'you've earned it'."Thus Ends The First Great HuntNow onto the final chapter of the First Part of Cáel 's journey.By FinalStand for Literotica.

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One of the best OVERALL weekend shows of 2025 to begin the official start to summer and close the NBA season in a dramatic way. Will it be one of the greatest upsets ever in the dangerous, valiant Pacers, or will it be one of the greatest seasons ever from the potentially historic Thunder? The 2025 NBA Finals Game 7 discussion and the roasting Shedeur Sanders for his spending in a Dodge truck foolishness, with Andrew, Eric, Brian Cowan, KINGG All City, Ralph Mentor, Brian No Pivot, Notorious and Saged

OPEN PHONES: DO I DONATE SPERM? MY WIFE SAYS YES: PART ONE OPEN PHONES: DO I DONATE SPERM? MY WIFE SAYS YES: PART TWO BDA: I DON'T SELL CRACK SPELLINBURG: MATTMAN VS FAT BOY

To get live links to the music we play and resources we offer, visit www.WOSPodcast.comThis show includes the following songs:Kelsi Mayne - Breaking Bad FOLLOW ON SPOTIFYMedusa's Barber - Fine Liar FOLLOW ON SPOTIFYAudra Watt - Daffodils FOLLOW ON SPOTIFYJulienne Dweck - Again and Again FOLLOW ON SPOTIFYDamnit Doll - If You Know FOLLOW ON SPOTIFYMolly James - Born From The Stone FOLLOW ON SPOTIFYSOZI - Just For A Minute FOLLOW ON SPOTIFYAir Quotes - What You Do Well FOLLOW ON SPOTIFYMileena Rayne - Don't Wait For Me FOLLOW ON SPOTIFYPhoebe Willo - Reverie FOLLOW ON SPOTIFYJoanne Bird - I Might As Well FOLLOW ON SPOTIFYSophia B - Love in New York FOLLOW ON SPOTIFYBog Witch - Girl In The Box FOLLOW ON SPOTIFYLina Stalyte - Move On - Remix FOLLOW ON SPOTIFYPerenna King - Billionaire FOLLOW ON SPOTIFYFor Music Biz Resources Visit www.FEMusician.com and www.ProfitableMusician.comVisit our Sponsor Profitable Musician Newsletter at profitablemusician.com/joinVisit our Sponsor Her Sound at hersound.co.ukVisit www.wosradio.com for more details and to submit music to our review board for consideration.Visit our resources for Indie Artists: https://www.wosradio.com/resourcesBecome more Profitable in just 3 minutes per day. http://profitablemusician.com/join

Headlines with Metallica here to save the day.. If you gonna merge in traffic, don't be coming up last minute trying to get in, you finna get smacked

How bout learning how to merge in traffic, Mattman has a video of what happened to him last week Headlines asks if it's inhumane to do the ice bucket challenge to your dog

This Truth and Consequences features Kevin, with HUGE nuts probably, telling his wife that they are getting a pool, an ABOVE GROUND POOL, just like he's wanted since he was kid.

Headlines The FOF HOTLINE is open 24/7, call today, 864-241-4318

The Ochelli Effect 4-25-2025 Friday Night Open Mic with B PeteThe Pope just died. Trump is Trump. Are you bored yet?The Last Open Mic to ever use skype in the mix is what you get in this podcast. Enjoy...---THE OCHELLI EFFECT WEEKLY READER unique writing and Revised submissions to:info@ochelli.com---Stay TunedOtherwise You could Miss Jimmy James, Danny From Cali, and The nearly unstoppable Spent Kent as they call in and add predictable Chaos while you sit there listening doing NOTHING , DAMNIT! Lazy, just waiting for other Monkies to throw fecal matter and splatter all over YOUR PRECIOUS MENTAL FLOSS! DID YOU FORGET HOW TO DIAL A DAMN PHONE? You know who you are FUCKING COWARD!!! If you know that note wasn't for you , cool and many thanks...Chuck talks too much and water is still wet, the sky appears to be blue and Broads are nuts...---Conspiracy TheoriesCASS R. SUNSTEINhttp://ochelli.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/05/ssrn_id1084585_code254274.pdf---The Co-Host WEBSITEhttp://www.bpete1969.com/TWITTER Xhttps://x.com/bpete1969FEDBOOK of META-VERSE CHORUS VERSEhttps://www.facebook.com/bpete1969---Ochelli Link Treehttps://linktr.ee/chuckochelli---NOVEMBER IN DALLAS LANCER CONFERENCEDISCOUNT FOR YOU10 % OFF code = Ochelli10https://assassinationconference.com/---Chuck on Signal ChatNewly Created Unsecure Point of ContactOchelliEffect.13https://signal.me/#eu/2IB1UjwfCEv08mqO-o1TtgrJF5pBvUGtKPXx77MWYPc9NKeoI59DCbltQo_uvqRZEmail Chuck or PayPablindjfkresearcher@gmail.comOchelli Link Treehttps://linktr.ee/chuckochelli

Headlines says who won the fan vote for the Rock N Roll Hall of Fame This dude is the worst boss in the world, just so happens to be sheriff too

“Who's Christine?”By LiminallySpaced. Listen to the Podcast at Explicit Novels."Who's Christine?""What?" I exclaimed, turning toward Kerri abruptly. She was still covered in my semen and bare chested"Easy, easy! You just got a text from someone named Christine. Asking where you were."I took my phone back, shoving it quickly into my pants pocket. I sat down on the edge of the bed to put on my shoes."So who is she?"Once again I didn't really know how to answer that question."Just a friend," I said flatly."Um Hmm," Kerri responded, doubtfully, "is she the kind of 'friend' who's gonna be upset your balls have already been completely drained?""Don't worry about it." I was colder than I should have been. Kerri was just curious, and I was being a jerk about it. Feeling guilty for my prickly tone, I scooted myself up toward the lounging Greek goddess of lust. "Listen," I said, placing my hand on her golden calf, "I'm sorry, I don't mean to be a jerk, I've just got a lot of stuff going on. A lot of confusing stuff that's just been a bitch to try and process.""No, I understand," her tits jiggled delightfully as she brushed her hair out of her face, "Lot of that going around. Just that time of life for everyone, I think. You can tell me about her next time."Next time. She wanted to do this again. Hell, I did too, but the thought of adding premeditation to what we did made my stomach grow cold. There would be no defense then, no excuse of passions getting the better of us, just pure dishonesty and subterfuge."Kerri," I began, "I don't know if we should do this again. I think it might be wrong."Kerri took a moment to consider my words, then sat up straight. Pressing her big tits into my arm she leaned in close and said "This doesn't have to be complicated, Tim. It can just be fun."I tiled my head in and kissed her. Hard."Just think about it, ok?"I nodded weakly."And send me those pictures, ok?"I smiled. We kissed. I took one last feel of her stupendous breasts, and left.I checked my phone in the car. I did, in fact, have a message from Christine asking where I was. I hadn't even considered what time it was, and I had definitely more than missed church. My conflicted feelings about Kerri became compounded by the returning knot in my stomach."Hey, sorry, I overslept. Long night." I wrote back to her. Not technically a lie."No problem. You wanna meet me at The Spot at 7?"I thought about it for a long moment. Thinking of Christine made me smile. What Christine and I had was arguably the least complicated of my romantic entanglements (or at least that was what I told myself). Seeing her would surely set my chaotic mind to rest. She had that effect on me."Sure thing."I got home to an empty house, jumped in the shower, and thought about what my night had been.Kerri said it didn't have to be complicated, and I wanted to believe her, but I had a hard time believing anything about my sex life could be uncomplicated. There was nothing uncomplicated about fucking my friend's girlfriend. There was nothing uncomplicated about the hot and cold between me and Tara.There was nothing uncomplicated about the feelings I was realizing I had developed for Christine.I didn't know what those feelings were, exactly, but they were more than just lust. We had been friends for so long that despite my best intentions it was proving to be impossible to separate the time I spent with her as a friend from the time I spent with her in bed. I knew there was no path forward for us. Like Kerri had said, nothing that happened this summer would really count once the fall came, and would most likely vanish to time as life moved on, but that didn't make it any easier to compartmentalize.It didn't make me want her any less.My car pulled into The Spot, and Christine was already waiting, leaning her lithe body against the hood of her car.The last lights of a golden sunset cast her in an amber glow. Her long, smooth legs had a shine to them, ascending up into short shorts that hugged her slight curves. As always, bare legs meant a more conservative top, but the wide, ragged mouth of her sweatshirt hung off her shoulder in a delicious way. I saw no bra strap. As soon as she saw my car, her eyes lit up and a smile blossomed on her face.I had barely put my car into park when all at once she had hopped into the passenger seat.We looked at each other in silence, an unspoken tension building."Hi," she said."Hi," I answered.Slowly she closed the distance between us on the big bench seat, licking her lips as she sidled up next to me.Her eyes twinkled in the fading light. Her hair cascaded down one side of her perfect face. She leaned in, and my lips touched hers in a long, slow kiss. This wasn't a hook up kiss, this was a real kiss. My hand reached up and cupped her head through her brunette locks. I felt her sigh.Then suddenly she pulled away from me with a start. There was a different look in her eye now, something I couldn't quite place. It wasn't lust, it was something more unsure. Then, as if trying to shake herself out of the feeling, her hands darted down to my pants, making quick work of the button and zipper.The cool air touched the skin of my cock only briefly, as it was quickly engulfed by the sweet, wet warmth of Christine's mouth.I had cum very hard three times in the recent past, so the sudden sensation of her sucking mouth on my tender flesh elicited a sharp "oh!" from me.Christine's lips and mouth worked at a feverish pace. This wasn't anything like the kiss we just shared, this was determined. She sucked and slobbered on my cock in a way that normally would have brought me to full mast almost immediately, but the combination of her uncharacteristic over eagerness, the sensitivity of my swollen skin, and my sexual exhaustion from the activities of the previous night and morning, got me only half hard at best."I want you to get hard for me, Tim," She said, switching over to a tight handjob while she spoke, "I want you to get so hard so you can cum on my face. Don't you want to cum on my face?"It's true Christine had become a lot more comfortable with dirty talk, and usually hearing all sorts of words and expressions I never would have expected for a pastor's daughter would have gotten me harder than Tetris, but this was too over the top. She was trying too hard. Something was off. For both of us.She dipped her head down and went back to work sucking hard, this time rolling my balls in her hand. My mind jumped back to the first time we experienced each other, right there in that same car. Her mouth had gone at my cock with a similar fervor, but there was a passion there, then. There was a need. That first time my cock went in her mouth I felt the whole energy of her body in every lick of her tongue.Last time she wanted my cock. She wanted my cum. This time, I couldn't help but feel like what she wanted was a distraction. It felt good, there was no denying it, but it didn't feel RIGHT. Not this time."Christine, Christine, stop, stop." I pleaded, and gently guided her head out of my lap. She sat back up, hair tousled over one eye, and wiped her wet mouth with the back of her hand. It was so delightfully lewd that even in my current state my cock couldn't help but surge at the sight."You wanna watch me touch myself?" She said with a lusty grin, working her hand into the front of her tight shorts."No, no, I mean yes, but no," I said, confused about what I wanted."What's wrong?" she said, furrowing her brow with the legitimate concern of a real friend.I looked at her for a moment. There was definitely something wrong here. I knew it immediately on my end, and that look on her face after that kiss; her sudden change in demeanor after; I knew she was feeling the same thing."Christine, I have to tell you something. When I got here tonight I wasn't sure if I was going to, but now I think I should.""Ok,” she said, her concern turning to confusion."The reason I wasn't at church, ""You overslept.""It's true, I did, but I have to tell you why." Christine was very still as she waited for my next words. "I spent the night with someone."I watched her face as the words landed. She was trying to remain calm, but I could see something else behind her eyes."So what, why are you telling me this?" She said with a nervous chuckle, "it's not like we're dating or anything.""I told you because I needed to. For the same reason I think you needed to hear it.""I don't think I need to hear you can't get it up because some other girl fucked your brains out, Tim." She said in a tone that was uncharacteristically nasty."That's not what I mean, and you know it.""Tim, I don't know what you mean," she said, turning away and nervously gathering her things, "but I do know that maybe this was a mistake tonight. I'm not exactly in the mood anymore.""Christine,” I sighed as she made her way out of the car."Why don't you go home and get some rest. You clearly need it."And with that she was gone. I sat alone in my car for a few moments, replaying the situation in my head. I needed to get my mind off of it, so I took out my phone and drafted an email to Just 4 the Watcher X O X O."Here you go" it read, "just might be the best painting I've ever seen. Can't wait till the next one ;)"I took a moment to look back on the slutty pictures Kerri had let me take, pictures of her gorgeous face and body splattered in my semen, attached them to the email, and hit send.Almost instantly, as though she had been waiting, I got an email back."Thanks so much for a lovely time. You're a great artist." I smiled at how the dumb joke Tara started seemed to continue to be useful. "Here's a tip for all your hard work ;)"There was an attachment.I clicked the file, and waited patiently as it loaded. It was probably only a couple seconds, but it felt like forever. Then, finally, the screen of my phone was taken up by a close up of Kerri's face. I recognized it right away as the full version of the photo she had used to entice me into her voyeuristic plan.Kerri looked up at me with the familiar sight of a bright, white slash of semen reaching up from the bridge of her nose into her dark curly hair; it was a sight I would never forget; but the whole picture was so much more erotic: her mouth was open slightly, a lustful smile on her face. Her lips and chin were splattered in gooey white, Mike's purple, spent cock inches from her covered skin.My cock surged back to life. I knew exactly why she was smiling. Mike may have been the one cumming on her face, but it was clear that she was taking this photo just for me.I reached down to my hardening cock and began to stroke frantically. It wasn't long before the image of Kerri's cummy face worked one more load out of me for the day.I arrived back home, dazed and spent, my cock and balls sore from the whirlwind of the last 24 hours. My step mom Kelly was there to greet me, a certain glow about her that could only mean one thing. I thought about the lusty alter-ego I had created for her in my mind, Kel, to separate the woman who helped raise me from the sexual creature who no doubt had spent the night with Brian last night.As Kelly talked I half listened, my mind wandering. I thought about my argument with Tara, and whether I was being unfair to her. I thought about how tomorrow was Monday, which meant I'd have to go back to work, have to interact with Letty for the first time since her domination of me Friday night. I thought about Kerri, about the feel of her body, the satisfied look on her face after I shot my cum on her; I thought about how wrong it felt, but also how good it felt. And finally I thought about Christine; what had we both discovered that we were too afraid to admit? I thought I knew, but I didn't know when the next time I'd see her would be. Not after tonight.At least until Kelly's words suddenly pierced through my daze and sent a cold lump into my stomach."Don't forget, sweetie, you've got the church youth camping trip next weekend!", oh, fuck.Chapter 26: Tim's boss teaches him a lessonThe church youth group camping trip was in four days, which meant that I had four days to think, and more specifically Over think, about what was going with Christine and I; where we stood, what we wanted, where we could possibly go from here, and what it all meant.If you had asked me just a few days ago if I was looking forward to it, I would have ecstatically said yes, and then probably zoned out, daydreaming about sneaking off from the group to get frisky in the woods. I'd picture myself leaning against a large rock, the only audible sounds the chirping of the birds in the trees and the moans vibrating around my hard cock as Christine worked it with her sweet, wet mouth.As I got close I'd suggest finishing in her mouth to avoid suspicion from the rest of our fellow campers, but then she'd pull off me with a hot gasp and demand I finish on her face. Hands stroking, my tip bobbing just above her lips I'd oblige, and with a stifled grunt and a hard deep breath I'd douse her in erratic white ropes.Fully spent, I'd look down at the pastor's daughter, a smile on her cum-covered face, and be struck by how beautiful she looked covered in my seed. And how nicely the colors of nature complimented her smoldering eyes.Or maybe she'd lay herself down among a bed of flowers, legs spread, her own petals on display and touch herself while I pleasured myself nearby. The bright colors would wrap her body in an erotic rainbow as she shook and shuddered beneath her fingers, her head turning to desperately suckle on the flared

What the hell was that song and how do we find it? Headlines with Mark Hoppus and Saddam Hussein, what's the connection? Sports with amateur golfer Ballester pissing on the course yesterday

Welcome to the show.  It's cold as balls and we're a little bitter about it.  It's ok though because we have good company and good coffee.  Today we sip a medium roast from Queen of Versailles.  Great presentation, great smell, and dang is it good.  This was a fun one to journal.  We get into some good stuff about teaching and learning so we went a little long.  Glad we had a lot of coffee.  Enjoy! CHECK OUT TODAYS COFFEE AT: Queen of Versailles https://qvcoffee.com/ CHECK OUT OUR DISCOUNT CODES: Breakfast At Dominique's https://hollywoodblends.com/ COFFEEREGULAR Airworks Coffee https://airworkscoffee.com/ COFFEEREG20 Monkey Cult Coffee https://monkeycultcoffee.com/ Discount Code: JOINTHECULT10 Doctor Coffee https://www.doctor-coffee.com/ Discount Code:   COFFEEREG $5 off your first order Wild Gift Coffee https://wildgiftcoffee.com/ Discount Code: COFFEEREG 10% off any order, single use GOLD LEAF JOURNALS  https://shopgoldleaf.com/products/coffee-journal Discount Code: COFFEEREGULAR  15% off anything in the shop CHECK OUT THE LEGION PROJECT AT: https://thelegionproject.com/ CHECK US OUT ON: SHOPIFY: https://coffee-regular-podcast.myshopify.com/ SPOTIFY: https://open.spotify.com/show/4ZhSOy5oDAHOAm4ggUdL2V?si=5DBsXhK3R2ufSMgpgtFGng iTUNES: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/coffee-regular/id1460681914 PODBEAN AT: https://coffeeregularshow.podbean.com FACEBOOK AT: Coffee Regular Podcast INSTAGRAM AT: @coffeeregularpodcast    

Best Damn Audio returns with a kid caught in the act We get an email from a guy who doesn't know how to tell his wife he DON'T want more kids

Headlines says Saw 11 has officially been scrapped Various other shits

Player 2 arrives.Based on the post of MsCherylTerra, in 3 parts. Listen to the ► Podcast at My First Time.At no point in the history of time or space would I have thought I'd end up geeking out over The Circlet of Nianus with Ashton Halliday. I mean, at no point would I have ever thought I'd end up sitting in the backseat of my car, chatting excitedly about games we'd recently played and upcoming ones we were looking forward to. There was no reason for me to think we'd get into a heated debate about which Final Fantasy was best, or that he'd have bad enough taste to claim that Final Fantasy VII was better than Final Fantasy VI."Next you're going to tell me you think Wheatley is a better villain than GLaDOS," he groaned."Of course not!" I said indignantly. "Wheatley's hilarious, but he's a moron. GLaDOS is smart enough to be an actual villain. But the real question is, do you think Cave Johnson is funnier than both of them or are you wrong?"Ashton threw his head back as he laughed. "We're in full agreement on that.""Phew," I said, leaning against the door. "It's a good thing you said that, otherwise there's no way we could be friends.""Are we friends?" he asked.My laughter faded as I met his eyes. There was still a half-smile on his lips, but his eyes studied me seriously."I mean; we aren't, you know. Not friends," I said."Yeah, but we used to be, like, actual friends."I fidgeted nervously. "We were kids.""Doesn't mean we weren't friends," he replied. "I don't really know why we stopped hanging out, Ramona."I swallowed hard. There was no reason for his words to sting so much; we'd stopped being friends because he hadn't invited me to his ninth birthday party. It was stupid. It was petty.And it bothered me that he didn't remember."I need to turn the car off," I said. "You can keep charging, just; I don't want to waste gas."Before he could respond, I opened the door. The rush of night air was a relief against my flushed skin and I took my time walking around the vehicle and turning it back to accessory mode before returning to the back seat."Ramona; " he started when I got in."Do you mind getting the dome light?" I interrupted. "It'll drain the battery too fast."He paused, then reached up and turned the light off as I shut the door. As I adjusted to the sudden darkness that fell over us, I realized how small the inside of my car felt."I believe you've got some Pokemon to master," I said, just for something to fill the silence. "And Zelda's not going to free herself from Calamity Ganon.""True," Ashton said lightly. "But I have a proposal for you."I closed my eyes and sighed. "I don't want to talk about; ""Mario Kart."I paused, then frowned. "What?"Ashton's face was barely visible in the darkness, but between his tone and the glimmer in his eyes, I could tell he was smiling."Mario Kart," he repeated. "Let's play it together.""You want to play; Mario Kart?""Okay, full disclosure?" he said. "I fucking love Mario Kart and no one ever wants to play it with me, and it's not as fun as a single-player game. Since we're hanging out anyway, let's play together."I was relieved that we were back to video game talk, though my confusion about his sudden dropping of the whole "friends" thing was slow to fade."Okay," I said slowly. "One problem, though.""I'll buy you the game if you don't have it," he said immediately."How am I supposed to download it? The power's out and I don't know what kind of fancy Honda your dad drives, but my car isn't equipped with Wi-Fi.""One step ahead of you." There was a rustling sound as he fiddled around for a moment, then I winced as the sudden brightness of his phone lit up the interior of the car. "I'll hotspot my phone. And we can do local play once you download it so we won't even need to stay connected."I looked at his phone, then up at the excitedly twinkling eyes gazing at me in the ghostly glow of the screen light."You're really into Mario Kart, eh?" I said, amused."Come on," he said, grinning. "I'll even go easy on you. At first.""Don't bother," I said, grabbing my Switch. "I'll have you know I'm a fucking champ when it comes to Mario Kart and there's no way I'm going easy on you."Ashton Humbled.By a glow that was ironically ghastly given the colorful nature of anything Mario-related, I destroyed Ashton."Have you ever even played this game before?" I asked after the first race, where I easily came in first."Beginner's luck," he said."Beginner? I've been playing Mario Kart since before you were born."He opened his mouth, then closed it and frowned. "I'm three months older than you.""Details, details," I said, then joined the next race."I might be a little rusty," he admitted after I wiped the floor with him again in the next race."A little?""Once I find my groove, you're going to be begging for mercy.""Sure, Ash. Gotta catch me first."He groaned as I giggled.During the third race, I managed to run him off a cliff."Jerk," he muttered."Bitch," I replied, and he burst out laughing."Just Supernatural or are you part of the whole trifecta?"I rolled my eyes as I drifted around a corner. "Do I look like I'm part of SuperWhoLock?""Blue hair, eyebrow piercing, complete and utter disdain for an overbearing mother? You're the fucking poster child for Tumblr."I missed hitting an Item Box as I glared at my screen. "Asshole."He laughed. "What, you can dish it out but you can't take it?"I gritted my teeth as an NPC Bowser blasted past me. "Let me remind you whose car this is and whose charger you're currently using.""Oh," he said, his laughter falling as flat as my tone had. "I; sorry.""Whatever."We finished the rest of the race in silence. I still beat him, but I didn't come in first."I was joking," he said when he finally crossed the finish line and the characters began to whirl around the track automatically. "I'm sorry.""It's fine.""Your hair looks awesome," he continued. "I didn't mean to make you feel bad about it or something. You look so; ""I don't care about that," I interrupted, partly because the fact he was complimenting my appearance was making me tingle in a way that was almost infuriating, since I shouldn't care at all what Ashton Halliday thought of how I looked, but mostly because it wasn't the thing that had bothered me. "I just don't need to be reminded about my mother right now."He was quiet for a moment. "Is everything; are you okay?""I'm fine," I said. "I don't want to talk about it."Out of the corner of my eye, I saw him nod."Got it." He mashed one of the buttons on his Switch. "Come on, start the next race. I've got a good feeling about this one."I snorted. "A good feeling about losing?""I'm gonna make you eat those words.""Looks like I'm going to be starving.""Big talker," he said. "You just wait."He came closer to beating me that time; neither of us came in first but he was only a couple of seconds behind me."Hope you're hungry," he teased."Oh, that's right!" I said suddenly."What?"I dug through the pocket on the back of the passenger seat. "Want some Oreos?""Does the Pope shit in the woods?""Depends on if the bear is Catholic."We both snickered, then went silent as we each popped an Oreo in our mouths. The dim light from our Switches filled the car, and I looked at him out of the corner of my eye as he grabbed another cookie."Can I ask you something stupid?" I asked suddenly.He took a bite of the Oreo. "Yeah."I picked up another one but didn't eat it, choosing instead to fidget with it by twisting the chocolate discs. "Don't laugh.""I might.""When we were kids, in like; third grade, I think? Maybe fourth?" I knew it was third grade, but I was trying to pretend like it was slightly less of a big deal than I was making it. "Sometime around then. You; you had a birthday party. Playing laser tag, I think.""Yeah, sounds about right," he said lightly.I swallowed hard, still twisting the Oreo back and forth. "Why didn't you invite me?""I did."I pressed my lips together as my stomach tightened. Of course he didn't remember."You didn't," I said. "Everyone was super excited about it and then the day came and; ""And your mom called and said you didn't want to go," he finished.I looked up, my eyes wide, to see him staring back at me with a hard expression on his face."It was third grade, not fourth," he said. "And my mom was mad because I'd insisted you were gonna come even though you didn't respond to the invitation. She'd already paid for everything for the party and your mom only called her like an hour before it started.""What?" I said. "That can't be right.""Trust me. I remember my mom being pissed about it."I bit my lip. "She said I wasn't invited."Ashton's face softened as he saw the confusion on mine. "Your mom totally hated me, Ramona. I mean, I kinda figured but my mom confirmed it after your mom called the police on me for skateboarding after ten p.m. at the park.""What?!"He started laughing. "Yeah, when I was like, fifteen. I mean, I seriously wasn't doing anything besides skateboarding, but I was scared shitless when the cops came and brought me home. I was lucky, though. He hung out to tell my mom that they only had to do something because Liz Roth was the one who called it in and that technically the bylaw did say that the park was closed after ten. After he left my mom said your mom thought I was a bad influence because she and her never got along." He took another cookie from the package, his smile fading. "I thought you'd just decided we weren't friends or something because you stopped wanting to hang out and you wouldn't even talk to me at school. I didn't know; she really told you I hadn't invited you?"I couldn't bring myself to respond. Yeah, she had told me Ashton hadn't invited me to his birthday party. And that had been so hurtful that I stopped being friends with him. And for; well, for ten years, since we were nineteen now, we hadn't been friends because my mom thought a child was, what, a bad influence? A troublemaker? And she'd;"She called the police on you?" I asked, my voice shaking with anger.

The Rock & Damnit Maurie chat jorts and Mocha! Trish Status' son Maximus talks about watching her fight. Amanda Seyfried on getting the wrong ‘Ghostbusters' autographs. 

Headlines with a man who got locked in a storage unit by his crazy girlfriend Are you the dad? We have to know

Spellinburg Mattman vs Fat Boy Hey Paige, you like this new submission from Dan in Columbia?

The American dollar, cryptos, it's all getting complicated with Elon in the picture, right? Headlines Sports with Vince McMahon rumors, what's he really up to?

This pre-valentine's day week crashes and burns as everyone cancels but it all turns out into an interesting weekend. I got to spend time with the Dave Juskow of the last generation (except he's rich). Damnit. I've gotta work on that. Also, Super Bowl Sunday at Elon and his wife's apt. I thought they were having a super bowl party but they only invited me. "Do you want us to order Thai food?" For Super Bowl Sunday? What is happening!?? Uh oh. All will be explained on this week's exciting episode of Juskow in the City. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

#272st for 13th February, 2025 or 3311! (33-Oh-Leven, not Oh-Eleven, OH-Leven)http://loosescrewsed.comJoin us on discord! And check out the merch store! PROMO CODEShttps://discord.gg/3Vfap47ReaSupport us on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/LooseScrewsEDSquad Update:  We have overheating systems Wars and Elections, Miola is the priority. We want to leave LTT 17102 and Balmus alone.  We are expanding again, probably from LA, probably to Calarum - I'm in the black Our new system, Maidubii needs a boost We're trying to push Semakhmets and the top faction in Gliese 9016 into expansion (eventually for the former). All details in the #standing-orders and/or the #loose-screws-factions channels of the Discord.PowerPlay Update:  Standings Update (like none) Key conflicts (probably some) PP Orders at home (same)For more information check the PowerPlay Hub for LSN operational orders, discussion and tips to complete those optional powerplay weekliesGalnet Update: https://community.elitedangerous.com/ Brewer Corporation Survey Initiative SYSTEM IN LOCKDOWNDev News:  FU on 2/26/25 Colonization update coming 2/26/25 under the name ‘Trailblazers.'Discussion: What we've been seeing out on DS3 without Audaxius – Still Discussing Weapons… Community Corner: DISTANT SCREWS 3 Event this Saturday! – High G Hill Climb to take place on Morgan's Rock - NGC 6188 Sector LC-V C2-28  Planet 6 – we shall be meeting on LarkShadow's Waypoint! We will be using the wing method to get everyone into the instance. The races shall be 2 commanders at a time, the one that gets higher than the other up the hill moves on, the other is eliminated. – 1st Place gets a Shirt or Sweater with the DS3 or Screws Logo of choice. – 2nd Place gets a stainless steel tumbler with the DS3 logo – 3rd place gets a Mug with the DS3 logo – every other place gets a hearty handshake. Commander Roy Cookson of the Loose Screws has been writing stories of his adventures out exploring with us, if anyone wishes to read them they can be found in the Distant Screws 3 thread, under “Roy's Stories.”  PINK stuff on sale ARX cause LOVE, DAMNIT!

Nick Viagas is very talented comedian. You can hear me say in the beginning of this session that he is handsome, which he is. He also stutters a bit. That combo of funny, attractive and vulnerability (a stutterer!) makes him appealing to the ladies. It seems he doesn't have to try too hard to get their attention and truthfully, they mostly take the initiative with Nick. Nick enjoys this of course! but he has reservations. Is he spending time (euphemism, you know what I mean) with them because it's what he wants or is it more that he's just not turning it down? Nick talks about his childhood and his family (challenging) and where he is now. He is extremely forthcoming and if I wanted to I could make this summary into lascivious clickbait but I have too much integrity for that! Damnit! Anyway, Nick is very articulate and self-aware with a great heart. You can learn a lot about how men see women from this session and maybe even a sexual health session. I know I did! See Nick perform! Feb. 15, 7pm https://www.secondcity.com/shows/new-york/struggle-bus-nyc Follow Nick @nickviagas

Well ____ we tried to get your brother on but did he catch wind of what was happening? Should we try for tomorrow? Don't blow it til then. Headlines with bad signs for Valentime's Day you'll need to avoid

Headlines with Budweiser wanting to be known as “American” beer now and not “domsestic” If you see a naked old hung dude at the gym just mind your business, FAT BOY

Headlines The FOF Tow Truck Driver hits us up, plus a classic scam on the back end

For some reason, we've devoted two episodes to Batman: Hush. Why did we do this to ourselves? For some payoff with The Riddler? The Riddler!?!?! Damnit, Loeb.  At least Thunderbolts #12 didn't disappoint with the big finale to their first story arc. Next Time: The Death of Elektra in Daredevil #178-182

Giancarlo Navas is joined by Pablo, Coach Lu and Franky to talk the Miami Heat's bounce back win against the Golden State Warriors: • Was this Niko Jovic's best game? • Heat two big lineups • Spo's brand new zone • TIME OUT!!!!! And more! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

The All Advice Show continues with Brad, who's going through a loss but he doesn't want anything from the estate, he's not a “things guy”, whatever that means If a video is going around that could hurt a business, does said business ever see the video?

Damnit, Christmas is over, oh well, here's a post Christmas, Thursday edition of TRG

BDA: LISTEN TO THIS FOUL MOUTH LITTLE KID OPEN PHONES: UNCLE OR DAD? THE DNA RESULTS ARE IN PAIGE'S MEDITATION TEST

BDA: I'M NOT A MA'AM DAMNIT MMCM: SPIDER GOAT SILK WOULD WE BE ALLOWED TO VOTE? WE TAKE THE TEST

Headlines with airport rules you need to remember this traveling season If you haven't changed your bed clothes yet, you damn better

Jaylon Johnson amid Bears' woes: 'God damnit, you've got to keep fighting' full 1560 Mon, 09 Dec 2024 23:48:57 +0000 fDpDyVNVZX35nQe7cMHx73Z9fBkTb7Tp nfl,chicago bears,sports Spiegel & Holmes Show nfl,chicago bears,sports Jaylon Johnson amid Bears' woes: 'God damnit, you've got to keep fighting' Matt Spiegel and Laurence Holmes bring you Chicago sports talk with great opinions, guests and fun. Join Spiegel and Holmes as they discuss the Bears, Blackhawks, Bulls, Cubs and White Sox and delve into the biggest sports storylines of the day. Recurring guests include Bears cornerback Jaylon Johnson, former Bears coach Dave Wannstedt, former Bears center Olin Kreutz, Cubs manager Craig Counsell, Cubs second baseman Nico Hoerner and MLB Network personality Jon Morosi. Catch the show live Monday through Friday (2 p.m. - 6 p.m. CT) on 670 The Score, the exclusive audio home of the Cubs and the Bulls, or on the Audacy app. 2024 © 2021 Audacy, Inc. Sports False https://player.a

I'M BUYING WHAT I WANT DAMNIT full 109 Mon, 25 Nov 2024 14:57:10 +0000 cuiOGz7IdS2w13r1lWFIBs5tMdghj3j1 music The Rise Guys Podcast music I'M BUYING WHAT I WANT DAMNIT Welcome to the Rise Guys Morning Show! "The Saviors Of Upstate Morning Radio" broke the mold when they hit the airwaves in 2003.  Originating from Greenville, South Carolina, Mattman, Nine, Paige & Fat Boy combine to deliver the South's #1 Morning Radio Show everyday 5-10AM.  And serve as the leaders of the esteemed "P1 Family."  Relevant and Irreverant!  Gahlay, it's the Rise Guys!  And It Is Good! 2024 © 2021 Audacy, Inc. Music False https://player.amperwavepodcasting.com?feed-link=https%3A%2F%2F

Pigskin Picks Dan in Columbia, are you there dude? We got requests but you ain't fillin em Headlines with the most clogged cities and no, it's not what you're thinking

Apologies for the radio silence - besides licking my financial wounds and feeling like an absolute prat for getting my election prediction SO HORRIBLY WRONG it has been hard to find the time and energy to get behind the mic. Hey, at least I'm not that Ann Seltzer lady. This episode also sounds like shit cause I recorded in a large room and did an AI edit. Damnit, you'll get what you get until law exams are done! This episiode we are having a good look at the plans of RFK Jr. who you all know is going to Make America Healthy Again. Well, is he? It's gonna be interesting. My inner cooker is fascinated to see how this goes, but as per usual the very positive things like removing toxic dyes from American food are completely counterbalanced by the fact that the person who plans to do it is a complete idiot. Law school ends this week. The future is bright! Plan some road trips, listeners, cause you're getting content for Christmas! Much love and I hope you enjoy!

The Mail Sack is back with email like a P1 witnessing somebody becoming a citizen today, and a birthday prison shout out. Email your questions, comments, complaints to theriseguys@aol.com and YOU could be on the next Sack

Did you vote yet? You orta

Damnit it's always been UFO and that's what it's gonna remain

Ballot boxes getting bombed outside, why are they outside? Not a good idea man

THIS CONTAINS SPOILERS TO TERRIFER 3, BEWARE.. DAMNIT, LOL

Are there too many musicians? Seems they come out with more everyday

Greens fall apart, genderweird slop, being too fat for needless cosmetic surgery, Brad Taste in rehab, MoonMoon's roleplay, April's discovery request, and Cobes's meatloaf.

We still get blamed for everything that goes on in the bathroom here, ALSO, it was nice outside yesterday Headlines with a guy in Rhode Island jumped at a bar for playing Sports with Oklahoma State coming up with an interesting way to raise money for their NIL collective

Can we kill the property tax already?