Podcast appearances and mentions of Glenn R Schiraldi

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Best podcasts about Glenn R Schiraldi

Latest podcast episodes about Glenn R Schiraldi

Nevertheless, She Persisted: Surviving Teen Depression and Anxiety
212. how to be more resilient feat. dr. glenn schiraldi

Nevertheless, She Persisted: Surviving Teen Depression and Anxiety

Play Episode Listen Later Feb 17, 2025 41:03


#212 Today's guest is Glenn R. Schiraldi. He has served on the stress management faculties at the Pentagon, the International Critical Incident Stress Foundation, and the University of Maryland, where he received the Outstanding Teaching Award. He is the author of various articles and books on human mental and physical health and the founder of Resilience Training International, which teaches practical, effective coping skills to build the strengths of resilience. In this episode, we discuss:+ How Dr. Schiraldi's military experiences led to him studying resilience + Effective ways to think about your mental health+ The psychology of toxic stress & resilience+ Coping skills for low & high stress situations + What ACE scores are & how they can impact your stress levels + How to ACTUALLY heal from ACEs + Finding specialists in trauma recovery + Trauma's impact on shame & self-esteem+ Healing from shame & traumatic childhood memories+ Self-doubt & why we all experience it + The secret to being truly resilient MENTIONED + Resilience Training International+ Dr. Schiraldi's books+ Accelerated Resolution Therapy+ Sidran InstituteSHOP GUEST RECOMMENDATIONS: https://amzn.to/3A69GOCSTARBUCKS GIFTCARD GIVEAWAY: Want coffee on me?! Each month I'll be randomly choosing a winner to receive a Starbucks giftcard! To enter this giveaway, all you have to do is leave a review of the podcast on Spotify and/or Apple Podcasts and DM me on a screenshot of your review on Instagram. Win bonus entries by tagging the podcast on your Instagram story or TikTok! Good luck!LET'S CONNECT+ Instagram (@shepersistedpodcast)+ Website (shepersistedpodcast.com)+ YouTube (Sadie Sutton: She Persisted Podcast)+ Twitter (@persistpodcast)+ Facebook (@shepersistedpodcast)+ TikTok (@shepersistedpodcast)+ inquiries@shepersistedpodcast.com© 2020 She Persisted LLC. This podcast is copyrighted subject matter owned by She Persisted LLC and She Persisted LLC reserves all rights in and to the...

THE EXPLODING HUMAN with Bob Nickman
GLENN R. SCHIRALDI, Ph.D: HEALING CHILDHOOD TRAUMA: EP. 184

THE EXPLODING HUMAN with Bob Nickman

Play Episode Listen Later Aug 28, 2023 51:48


GLENN R. SCHIRALDI, Ph.D., Lt. Colonel (USA, Retired), has served on the stress management faculties at the Pentagon, the International Critical Incident Stress Foundation, and the University of Maryland School of Public Health, where he received the Outstanding Teacher Award and other teaching/service awards. His 14 books on stress-related topics have been translated into seventeen foreign languages, and include: The Resilience Workbook; The Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder Sourcebook; World War II Survivors: Lessons in Resilience; and The Self-Esteem Workbook, His latest book, The Adverse Childhood Experiences Recovery Workbook, helps people heal the hidden wounds from toxic childhood stress, which lead to a wide array of adult medical and psychological disorders. Dr. Schiraldi has trained high-risk groups (such as the military, police, and firefighters), mental health professionals, and laypersons around the world on various aspects of stress, trauma., and resilience His research at the University of Maryland has found that resilience skills training increases resilience, happiness, self-esteem, optimism, and curiosity, while reducing anxiety, depression, and anger.           He is the founder of Resilience Training International (www.ResilienceFirst.com), which teaches people how to prevent and recover from stress-related conditions (such as PTSD, depression, and anxiety), while optimizing mental health and performance under pressure. Glenn is a graduate of the U.S. Military Academy, West Point, and a Vietnam-era veteran. His doctoral degree is from the University of Maryland. He and his wife recently completed four years volunteering  as leaders of an addiction recovery program.  

Leading Saints Podcast
Helping Others Overcome Sin, Trauma, & a Tough Life | An Interview with Glenn Schiraldi

Leading Saints Podcast

Play Episode Listen Later Mar 11, 2023 66:27


Glenn R. Schiraldi, Ph.D., Lt. Colonel (US Army Reserve, Retired), is a graduate of the U.S. Military Academy, West Point, and a Vietnam-era veteran. He holds graduate degrees from Brigham Young University and the University of Maryland, and has served on the stress management faculties at the Pentagon, the International Critical Incident Stress Foundation, and the University of Maryland School of Public Health. He has trained mental health professionals and laypersons—including high-risk groups such as the military, police, and firefighters—on stress, trauma, and resilience. Glenn is the founder of Resilience Training International, which teaches how to prevent and recover from stress-related conditions such as PTSD, depression, and anxiety, while optimizing mental health and performance under pressure. An eternally-grateful convert of 47 years, Glenn serves in a young single adult branch presidency and, with his wife, leads the Addiction Recovery Program in his stake in Florida. Highlights 02:40 Kurt introduces Glenn and the topic of childhood trauma. 05:15 Glenn shares his background and conversion story. 08:25 Glenn explains what he does and what led him to write many books and create courses to help people with their mental health. 11:30 Childhood wounds and how they affect people who are religious versus non religious 13:50 The original ten adverse childhood experiences that cause wounds that people carry into adulthood 16:00 Unresolved pain leads people to drugs and pornography. Unresolved childhood wounds can manifest physically or spiritually. 18:50 How can a leader be a resource to those struggling with childhood wounds and lead them in the right direction to find healing? 20:30 How memories are imprinted on us 23:30 We need a deeper, more dynamic approach to healing childhood trauma. It's important to find a therapist that is a trauma specialist. 27:00 Glenn explains Accelerated Resolution Therapy, known as ART. This is a fairly new form of therapy that is very effective for helping people with trauma. 34:30 Leaders can encourage people to write out their feelings. Expressive writing and journaling can benefit people trying to deal with old trauma that don't want to talk about it. 40:00 God is the ultimate attachment figure and his love is the ultimate answer to shame. 45:00 According to research it's a myth that religion adds to more shame. Religion can cause guilt. Religion is the answer to guilt. 48:50 Big T trauma and small t trauma 51:50 Do most issues come from childhood trauma? 54:45 Coping with trauma by perfectionism and overachieving. They try to overcompensate. 58:00 Latter-day Saint people tend to be overachievers. Most overachievers were adaptive and they like it. Others have fear-driven overachievement. 1:01:00 We don't have to suffer for decades. A lot of times we just need to learn certain skills to overcome. Take the time to find the right therapist. 1:03:20 A good leader loves the people as Christ did. Links The Adverse Childhood Experiences Recovery Workbook Glenn R. Schiraldi books Accelerated Resolution Therapy Resilience Training International Read the TRANSCRIPT of this podcast Watch on YouTube Get 14-day access to the Core Leader Library The Leading Saints Podcast is one of the top independent Latter-day Saints podcasts as part of nonprofit Leading Saints' mission to help Latter-day Saints be better prepared to lead. Learn more and listen to any of the past episodes for free at LeadingSaints.org. Past guests include Emily Belle Freeman, David Butler, Hank Smith, John Bytheway, Liz Wiseman, Stephen M. R. Covey, Julie Beck, Brad Wilcox, Jody Moore, Tony Overbay, John H. Groberg, Elaine Dalton, Tad R. Callister, Lynn G. Robbins, J. Devn Cornish, Dennis B. Neuenschwander, Anthony Sweat, John Hilton III, Barbara Morgan Gardner, Blair Hodges, Whitney Johnson, Ryan Gottfredson, Greg McKeown, DeAnna Murphy,

Leading Saints Podcast
Helping Others Overcome Sin, Trauma, & a Tough Life | An Interview with Glenn Schiraldi

Leading Saints Podcast

Play Episode Listen Later Mar 11, 2023 66:27


Glenn R. Schiraldi, Ph.D., Lt. Colonel (US Army Reserve, Retired), is a graduate of the U.S. Military Academy, West Point, and a Vietnam-era veteran. He holds graduate degrees from Brigham Young University and the University of Maryland, and has served on the stress management faculties at the Pentagon, the International Critical Incident Stress Foundation, and the University of Maryland School of Public Health. He has trained mental health professionals and laypersons—including high-risk groups such as the military, police, and firefighters—on stress, trauma, and resilience. Glenn is the founder of Resilience Training International, which teaches how to prevent and recover from stress-related conditions such as PTSD, depression, and anxiety, while optimizing mental health and performance under pressure. An eternally-grateful convert of 47 years, Glenn serves in a young single adult branch presidency and, with his wife, leads the Addiction Recovery Program in his stake in Florida. Highlights 02:40 Kurt introduces Glenn and the topic of childhood trauma. 05:15 Glenn shares his background and conversion story. 08:25 Glenn explains what he does and what led him to write many books and create courses to help people with their mental health. 11:30 Childhood wounds and how they affect people who are religious versus non religious 13:50 The original ten adverse childhood experiences that cause wounds that people carry into adulthood 16:00 Unresolved pain leads people to drugs and pornography. Unresolved childhood wounds can manifest physically or spiritually. 18:50 How can a leader be a resource to those struggling with childhood wounds and lead them in the right direction to find healing? 20:30 How memories are imprinted on us 23:30 We need a deeper, more dynamic approach to healing childhood trauma. It's important to find a therapist that is a trauma specialist. 27:00 Glenn explains Accelerated Resolution Therapy, known as ART. This is a fairly new form of therapy that is very effective for helping people with trauma. 34:30 Leaders can encourage people to write out their feelings. Expressive writing and journaling can benefit people trying to deal with old trauma that don't want to talk about it. 40:00 God is the ultimate attachment figure and his love is the ultimate answer to shame. 45:00 According to research it's a myth that religion adds to more shame. Religion can cause guilt. Religion is the answer to guilt. 48:50 Big T trauma and small t trauma 51:50 Do most issues come from childhood trauma? 54:45 Coping with trauma by perfectionism and overachieving. They try to overcompensate. 58:00 Latter-day Saint people tend to be overachievers. Most overachievers were adaptive and they like it. Others have fear-driven overachievement. 1:01:00 We don't have to suffer for decades. A lot of times we just need to learn certain skills to overcome. Take the time to find the right therapist. 1:03:20 A good leader loves the people as Christ did. Links The Adverse Childhood Experiences Recovery Workbook Glenn R. Schiraldi books Accelerated Resolution Therapy Resilience Training International Read the TRANSCRIPT of this podcast Watch on YouTube Get 14-day access to the Core Leader Library The Leading Saints Podcast is one of the top independent Latter-day Saints podcasts as part of nonprofit Leading Saints' mission to help Latter-day Saints be better prepared to lead. Learn more and listen to any of the past episodes for free at LeadingSaints.org. Past guests include Emily Belle Freeman, David Butler, Hank Smith, John Bytheway, Liz Wiseman, Stephen M. R. Covey, Julie Beck, Brad Wilcox, Jody Moore, Tony Overbay, John H. Groberg, Elaine Dalton, Tad R. Callister, Lynn G. Robbins, J. Devn Cornish, Dennis B. Neuenschwander, Anthony Sweat, John Hilton III, Barbara Morgan Gardner, Blair Hodges, Whitney Johnson, Ryan Gottfredson, Greg McKeown, DeAnna Murphy,

Finding Genius Podcast
How You Can Prevent And Recover From Stress With Resilience Training

Finding Genius Podcast

Play Episode Listen Later Jun 12, 2022 32:10


Stress-related conditions affect a vast array of individuals. Many health professionals are finding innovative and effective ways to not only manage these disorders, but also prevent them from happening. In this episode, we connect with Dr. Glenn R. Schiraldi. Dr. Schiraldi is a retired Lieutenant Colonel in the U.S. Army Reserves, Adjunct Professor at The University of Maryland School of Public Health, Author, and founder of Resilience Training International. Throughout his career in public health, Dr. Schiraldi has primarily focused his research on preventing stress-related mental disorders such as post-traumatic stress disorder.  Tune in now to hear Dr. Schiraldi discuss: What resilience training is, and how it helps individuals who suffer from stress conditions. Types of adult and childhood trauma that contribute to medical and psychological diseases. The benefits of implementing effective stress management practices. Offer: This episode is sponsored by Viome. Use the code GENIUS to get an extra $20 off on Health Intelligence Test. Check it out now: Viome You can find out more about Dr. Schiraldi and his approach by visiting www.resiliencefirst.com Episode also available on Apple Podcast: http://apple.co/30PvU9C

Happy and Healthy Mind with Dr. Rozina
HHM#45: Overcoming Adverse Childhood Experiences: Glenn R. Schiraldi, Ph.D

Happy and Healthy Mind with Dr. Rozina

Play Episode Listen Later Mar 18, 2021 35:52


Are you suffering from the hidden wounds of toxic childhood stress? Would you like to learn some practical steps so you can empower yourself despite all your past experiences? In this episode of 'Happy and Healthy Mind with Dr. Rozina,' our guest, Dr. Glenn Schiraldi shared some practical exercises for overcoming ACEs from his newest book, The Adverse Childhood Experiences Recovery Workbook. Glenn R. Schiraldi, Ph.D., retired Lt. Colonel has served on the stress management faculties at the Pentagon, the International Critical Incident Stress Foundation, and the University of Maryland School of Public Health. He is the founder of Resilience Training International (www.ResilienceFirst.com), which teaches people how to prevent and recover from stress-related conditions. Tune in to this recording so you can reduce your suffering, improve happiness, improve your health and overall functioning. THREE WAYS TO GET THE FREE RESOURCES SHARED IN THIS PROGRAM SIGN UP AT https://bit.ly/HHMGSU TEXT: Word "Joyful" to 38470. JOIN FB Group: Happy and Healthy Mind with Dr. Rozina'; http://bit.ly/HHMwDRG LOVE THIS VIDEO and CHANNEL? HERE are YOUR NEXT STEPS! 1) SUBSCRIBE to my channel! 2) SHARE THIS EPISODE WITH A FRIEND 3) GRAB YOUR FREE AUDIO GUIDE: “Relax on the go” https://www.stresstojoy.com/newsletter 4) SIGN UP FOR YOUR FREE Stress to Joy AUDIOBOOK on AUDIBLE: https://adbl.co/2w9LL5W 5) GET MY BOOKS/GUIDED GRATITUDE JOURNAL/AUDIOBOOKS https://drrozina.com/books/ 6) ENROLL IN STRESS TO JOY ONLINE COURSE https://www.stresstojoy.com/onlinecourse 7) BOOK ME FOR YOUR SPEAKING, LEADERSHIP TRAINING, CORP. CONSULTING: https://drrozina.com/ 8) MAKE AN APPOINTMENT FOR TREATMENT: https://shifahealth.org/request-an-appointment LET'S CONNECT!

Your Aha! Life
34. How to Stop Comparing Yourself to Others: Know Your Self-Worth

Your Aha! Life

Play Episode Listen Later Feb 7, 2021 47:07


As social beings, we all compare ourselves to others. However, how can we stop comparing ourselves to others in a way that is destructive. It all comes down to knowing your intrinsic self-worth and building positive self-esteem. In today's episode, I come to this topic as a seeker or explorer myself. I decided to tackle this topic because I've had several requests from readers of my blog and others. It's a common issue that can hold people back from being their best selves and living the life of their dreams. So, I'm diving in. In How to Stop Comparing Yourself to Others: Know Your Self-Worth, I draw upon some prior research and I share some key themes from the book, 10 Simple Solutions for Building Self-Esteem: How to End Self-Doubt, Gain Confidence, and Create a Positive Self-Image (Glenn R. Schiraldi, 2007). There are so many gold nuggets in this book. The point that resonated most with me is the importance of Unconditional Worth - a building block to healthy self-esteem. Knowing that you have an intrinsic worth that is equal, immeasurable, and unchanging is a game-changer when comparing yourself to another. Listen in as I share why you compare yourself to others, the good that comes from it, and how you can make reasonable comparisons without going down a downward spiral and damaging your sense of self. When you've finished listening, head over to my private Facebook group, The Aha! Community (join, if you're not a member) or go to IG @tonya.yourahalife.com and we'll continue the conversation. As always, thank you for listening. Please download, leave a review, thumbs up, 5-star rating, and also important, please share with your networks across social media. Thank you! xo, Tonya --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/yourahalife/message

We Heal Together
How to Break Free of Toxic Relationship Patterns.

We Heal Together

Play Episode Listen Later Aug 24, 2020 33:05


Podcast InfoA new podcast episode drops every Monday.  Music credit: L-Ray Music, Courtesy of Shutterstock, Inc.Learn more about your host, Cordelia, by clicking hereBe sure to follow Cordelia on Instagram: @codependentrecoveryWant to help me make this podcast better?  Take an anonymous survey here.---------Workbook + Community + Free ResourcesAre you going through a breakup or divorce?  Here is the link to the 98-page workbook.  Print version + ebook version available worldwide.Want to join the community (i.e., community club or book club)? Click hereWant access to free resources? Click here--------------------------------------------------------------------HOW TO BREAK OUT OF TOXIC RELATIONSHIP PATTERNSHeal all the parts of you (including the part of you that stayed or wanted to stay).Find a licensed counselor/therapist: Check out Open Path if you are in the US & money is an issue [https://openpathcollective.org/].Explore childhood wounds.Make a list of warning signs/red flags for future relationships.Be gentle with yourself.Read books to help you understand your issues better [i.e., I realized I struggle with codependency issues, so the following books helped me: “Codependent No More” by Melody Beattie” & “Facing Codependence” by Pia Mellody”]Buy a workbook for self-esteem [i.e., I bought “the Self Esteem Workbook” by Glenn R. Schiraldi”]Accept help from your support system and friends.Focus on living in the present.Practice positive self-talk.Write out a list of dealbreakers that you will stick to in the future.Assess what your boundaries are [see below for examples].Go no contact with your ex.Fully acknowledge you have a pattern of being in toxic relationships.Explore what relationships were modeled to you as a child.Think about a friend or family member’s relationship that you respect.  Take notes [i.e., try to find a new “model” for a healthy relationship].Give yourself time to heal.  Do not date until you are healed.Form new friendships + build a social network.Reconnect with any family + friends that you drifted from during your toxic relationshipDevelop hobbies + interests.Learn how to trust your gut/intuition in relationships.Consider seeing a psychiatrist for underlying issues (i.e., depression).Go outside more + go for walks.Don’t be afraid to tell your story.Cut out people from your life that don’t make you feel good about yourself.Get some sunlight + go outside.Aim for 7 to 9 hours of sleep per night.Take care of basic hygiene (brush your teeth, take a shower, etc.).Get rid of any reminders of your ex.Accept reality + abandon the fantasy.--------CORDELIA’S BOUNDARIES:I will not sleep with someone who calls me names.I will not reach out to someone who abandoned me.I will not take back someone who cheated.I will not have conversations with anyone if I feel desperate.

mental health practice trauma focus explore write mindfulness ptsd heal self love vulnerability guilt abuse blame accept red flags selfhelp affirmations bullies perfectionism personal development domestic violence self worth self esteem self improvement growth mindset healthy relationships toxic relationships aim narcissists gaslighting self compassion brene brown break free assess reconnect self talk self acceptance emotional health courtesy trust the process healing journey inner critic psychopaths building confidence alcoholic abusive dysfunctional know your worth untamed trauma informed alcoholics anonymous coping mechanisms emotional abuse trauma healing glennon doyle codependent cptsd narcissistic abuse positive self talk trauma recovery coping skills radical acceptance alcoholics kristin neff protect your peace al anon shutterstock overcoming perfectionism trauma bonding no contact loving relationships radical self love complex ptsd abuse survivors physical abuse triangulation guilt shame guilt trip domestic violence survivors name calling radical self care kind words radical self acceptance relationship patterns melody beattie building self esteem you are worthy psychological abuse toxic shame codependent no more codependent relationships harriet lerner how to love yourself healing shame negative talk overcoming codependency adult children of alcoholics pia mellody herebe be kind to yourself low self confidence self help tips codependency recovery prioritize yourself open path silence the shame self help tools glenn r schiraldi
We Heal Together
Let's Talk About What Abuse Looks Like in Relationships.

We Heal Together

Play Episode Listen Later Aug 22, 2020 40:21


Podcast InfoA new podcast episode drops every Monday.  Music credit: L-Ray Music, Courtesy of Shutterstock, Inc.Learn more about your host, Cordelia, by clicking hereBe sure to follow Cordelia on Instagram: @codependentrecoveryWant to help me make this podcast better?  Take an anonymous survey here.---------Workbook + Community + Free ResourcesAre you going through a breakup or divorce?  Here is the link to the 98-page workbook.  Print version + ebook version available worldwide.Want to join the community (i.e., community club or book club)? Click hereWant access to free resources? Click here-----CITATIONS1. TYPES OF ABUSE - https://www.loveisrespect.org/is-this-abuse/types-of-abuse/2. WHAT IS EMOTIONAL ABUSE? - https://www.joinonelove.org/learn/emotional-abuse-really-means/3. SIGNS OF MENTAL/EMOTIONAL ABUSE - https://www.healthline.com/health/signs-of-mental-abuse4. DEFINITION OF SILENT TREATMENT - https://www.aconsciousrethink.com/5547/silent-treatment-abuse/5. SILENT TREATMENT - https://www.psychopathfree.com/articles/silent-treatment-covert-abuse.262/ RESOURCES TO GET HELP1. Follow @codependentrecovery on Instagram for more tips.2. https://www.thehotline.org/: Available 24/7 for chat & calls [1-800-787-3224) for women, men, and LGBTQ survivors of domestic violence. They also offer safety planning.3. https://coda.org/ - runs online support groups for people struggling with Codependency.4. www.domesticshelters.org – helps you locate shelters and resources.They also have some online support groups.5. https://openpathcollective.org/ - a great resource for finding an affordable counselor6. https://www.womenslaw.org/ - can look up laws by state7. https://translifeline.org/ - Crisis hotline surviving transgender people (1-877-565-8860)8. https://www.rainn.org/ - Available 24/7 for chats & calls [1-800-656-4673] for sexual assault survivors.9. https://1in6.org/ - Available 24/7 chat for men who are survivors of sexual assault.  Also offer weekly support group online meetings10. https://hotpeachpages.net/ - For non-US residents, this site directs you to services for domestic abuse internationally.11. https://sanctuaryforfamilies.org/safety-planning-covid19/ -  For help with safety planning.12. https://www.loveisrespect.org/ - Supports youth and young adults in ending dating violence. The website includes planning resources, legal help, educator toolkits, and more—[Can also call 1-800-331-9474 or text “loveis” to 22522].13. https://www.strongheartshelpline.org/ - StrongHearts Native Helpline is a safe domestic, dating, and sexual violence helpline for American Indians and Alaska Natives, offering culturally-appropriate support and advocacy daily from 7 a.m. to 10 p.m. CT. Anonymous and confidential. [1-844-762-8483]14. https://www.nwnetwork.org/ - The Northwest Network works to end abuse in lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender communities. It strives to support and empower all survivors through education and advocacy. [1-206-568-7777]15. https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/ - The Lifeline provides 24/7, free and confidential support for people in distress, prevention, crisis resources for you or your loved ones, and best practices for professionals. [1-800-273-8255]16. https://www.amazon.com/Codependent-No-More-Controlling-Yourself/dp/0894864025 - Codependent No More: How to Stop Controlling Others and Start Caring for Yourself by Melanie Beattie [useful book for recognizing some areas that may need work & may be keeping you in the relationship]17. https://www.amazon.com/dp/1626255938/ref=cm_sw_em_r_mt_dp_LcsqFbV12KY81 - The Self-Esteem Workbook (A New Harbinger Self-Help Workbook) by Glenn R. Schiraldi Ph.D. [useful workbook that helps with your self-esteem]

relationships crisis depression trauma lgbtq mindfulness ptsd survivors heal self love vulnerability guilt abuse blame red flags selfhelp affirmations bullies perfectionism personal development domestic violence self worth anonymous self esteem self improvement assault growth mindset healthy relationships toxic relationships sexual assault narcissists gaslighting self compassion lifeline brene brown self talk self acceptance codependency emotional health courtesy trust the process healing journey inner critic psychopaths building confidence alcoholic abusive american indian dysfunctional know your worth untamed trauma informed abusive relationships alcoholics anonymous coping mechanisms emotional abuse trauma healing glennon doyle codependent cptsd narcissistic abuse positive self talk trauma recovery coping skills radical acceptance alcoholics kristin neff protect your peace al anon shutterstock overcoming perfectionism trauma bonding no contact loving relationships radical self love complex ptsd silent treatment abuse survivors alaska native physical abuse triangulation guilt shame guilt trip domestic violence survivors name calling radical self care kind words radical self acceptance melody beattie building self esteem you are worthy psychological abuse toxic shame codependent no more codependent relationships harriet lerner how to love yourself healing shame start caring negative talk stop controlling others overcoming codependency adult children of alcoholics pia mellody herebe be kind to yourself low self confidence self help tips codependency recovery prioritize yourself silence the shame self help tools glenn r schiraldi