Podcast appearances and mentions of tony overbay

What if the very strategies that saved you as a child are now sabotaging your adult relationships? In Part 2 of Tony's series on emotional immaturity, discover why your most persistent relationship struggles aren't character flaws—they're outdated survival software still running in the background of your life. Through the powerful ACT metaphor of "The Man in the Hole," you'll understand why working harder with familiar emotional tools only digs you deeper into relationship problems. When someone offers you a ladder out of your patterns, why do you keep trying to dig with it instead? This episode reveals how to recognize when it's time to put down the shovel of old coping strategies and climb toward something completely different. Meet the clients who've made this transformation: the chronic fixer who learned to ask "what do you need from me?" instead of immediately solving, the humor-deflector who shocked a room into silence by sharing something real, and the lifelong people-pleaser whose hands shook as she said "no" for the first time—and discovered her marriage actually got stronger. You'll explore Terry Real's revolutionary insight that childhood adaptations become adult roadblocks, learn the art of re-parenting yourself with compassion instead of criticism, and discover why emotional maturity isn't about never falling into old patterns—it's about recognizing when you're there and having new tools to respond. Whether you struggle with hypervigilance, perfectionism, control issues, or people-pleasing tendencies, this episode offers a shame-free framework for honoring your inner child's brilliant survival strategies while empowering your adult self to take the lead. Because growth isn't about eliminating your protective parts—it's about expanding your repertoire of responses and choosing consciously instead of reacting automatically. Ready to stop digging and start climbing? Your ladder awaits. 00:00 Introduction and Recap 01:23 The Story of Tyler 03:53 Tyler's Realization and Therapy 09:39 Acceptance and Commitment Therapy Metaphor 15:46 Revisiting Emotional Immaturity 19:30 Reparenting Yourself 25:05 Examples of Reparenting in Action 29:00 Exploring Emotional Immaturity Traits 40:54 Recognizing and Validating Emotions 42:47 Dependence on External Validation 48:54 Taking Ownership and Accountability 51:49 Mind Reading and Communication 01:03:55 Hypervigilance and Emotional Containment 01:07:12 Perfectionism and Control 01:11:49 Integration and Emotional Maturity 01:15:57 Real-Life Examples of Emotional Growth 01:22:05 The Journey of Emotional Maturity

What if the very strategies that saved you as a child are now sabotaging your adult relationships? In Part 2 of Tony's series on emotional immaturity, discover why your most persistent relationship struggles aren't character flaws—they're outdated survival software still running in the background of your life. Through the powerful ACT metaphor of "The Man in the Hole," you'll understand why working harder with familiar emotional tools only digs you deeper into relationship problems. When someone offers you a ladder out of your patterns, why do you keep trying to dig with it instead? This episode reveals how to recognize when it's time to put down the shovel of old coping strategies and climb toward something completely different. Meet the clients who've made this transformation: the chronic fixer who learned to ask "what do you need from me?" instead of immediately solving, the humor-deflector who shocked a room into silence by sharing something real, and the lifelong people-pleaser whose hands shook as she said "no" for the first time—and discovered her marriage actually got stronger. You'll explore Terry Real's revolutionary insight that childhood adaptations become adult roadblocks, learn the art of re-parenting yourself with compassion instead of criticism, and discover why emotional maturity isn't about never falling into old patterns—it's about recognizing when you're there and having new tools to respond. Whether you struggle with hypervigilance, perfectionism, control issues, or people-pleasing tendencies, this episode offers a shame-free framework for honoring your inner child's brilliant survival strategies while empowering your adult self to take the lead. Because growth isn't about eliminating your protective parts—it's about expanding your repertoire of responses and choosing consciously instead of reacting automatically. Ready to stop digging and start climbing? Your ladder awaits. 00:00 Introduction and Recap 01:23 The Story of Tyler 03:53 Tyler's Realization and Therapy 09:39 Acceptance and Commitment Therapy Metaphor 15:46 Revisiting Emotional Immaturity 19:30 Reparenting Yourself 25:05 Examples of Reparenting in Action 29:00 Exploring Emotional Immaturity Traits 40:54 Recognizing and Validating Emotions 42:47 Dependence on External Validation 48:54 Taking Ownership and Accountability 51:49 Mind Reading and Communication 01:03:55 Hypervigilance and Emotional Containment 01:07:12 Perfectionism and Control 01:11:49 Integration and Emotional Maturity 01:15:57 Real-Life Examples of Emotional Growth 01:22:05 The Journey of Emotional Maturity

My friend and colleague Tony Overbay is back, and we're unpacking one of the most transformative concepts in relational healing: differentiation. At its core, differentiation is the ability to say, “This is who I am” and to stay rooted in your identity, beliefs, and emotions, even when others might pressure you to conform. It's about holding onto yourself while staying connected to others, without relying on external validation to feel okay. In this episode Tony and I talk about what differentiation really means, and how developing a solid sense of self—what Tony calls a “90% solid, 10% flexible” ratio—can change how you navigate conflict, boundaries, intimacy, and even sex.  Differentiation isn't something you do to fix the relationship. It's something you do to help you hold onto or come home to yourself. Here's what else we discuss in this episode: The truth about interdependence and how it is the opposite of codependence (14:03) Tony breaks down the four points of balance in differentiation: building a solid sense of self, self-regulating emotions, managing reactivity, and sitting with discomfort for growth (17:22) The dangers of chasing external validation instead of developing self-worth from within (20:08) Why “constructing your crucible” is both hard and necessary (39:15) Learn more about Tony Overbay:  Tony Overbay is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, Certified Mindful Habit Coach, and host of two award-winning mental health podcasts, The Virtual Couch and Waking Up to Narcissism, with over 12 million downloads across 150+ countries. He also co-hosts Love, ADHD with author Julie Lee, The Mind, The Mirror, and Me with his daughter Mackie, and Murder on the Couch, a true-crime-meets-therapy podcast with his daughter Sydney. Together, Tony, Mackie, and Sydney offer live weekly relationship advice to over 20,000 viewers across TikTok (@virtualcouch), Instagram (@virtual.couch) and YouTube. Tony's first book, He's a Porn Addict, Now What?, was an Amazon best-seller in Sexual Health and Recovery and he currently has two books scheduled for a late 2025 release. One is based on his “Waking Up to Narcissism” podcast, and the other is on couples communication based on his “4 Pillars of a Connected Conversation,” which he developed while working with over 1500 couples over the past 20 years. He works with individuals and couples on issues including narcissistic traits, states, and tendencies, emotional immaturity, betrayal trauma, faith transitions, and addiction. He's the creator of The Path Back, a faith-based online pornography recovery program, and offers courses on couples communication, parenting, and navigating faith journeys at tonyoverbay.com (https://tonyoverbay.com/). Tony has four adult children, recently became a grandpa, and has been married to his high school sweetheart, Wendy, for 34 years. Before becoming a therapist, he worked as a software executive and wrote a humor column for nearly eight years. He's an avid runner with over 100 marathons and ultramarathons under his belt, including a dozen 100-mile races. Resources & Links: Thank you to today's podcast sponsor: Our Family WizardSubmit your questions here for possible inclusion in future Q&A podcast episodes Focused Strategy Sessions with KatePhoenix Rising: A Divorce Empowerment Collective Tony's websiteTony on InstagramTony on TikTok =================== DISCLAIMER:  THE COMMENTARY AND OPINIONS AVAILABLE ON THIS PODCAST ARE FOR INFORMATIONAL AND ENTERTAINMENT PURPOSES ONLY AND NOT FOR THE PURPOSE OF PROVIDING LEGAL OR PSYCHOLOGICAL ADVICE.  YOU SHOULD CONTACT AN ATTORNEY, COACH, OR THERAPIST IN YOUR STATE TO OBTAIN ADVICE WITH RESPECT TO ANY PARTICULAR ISSUE OR PROBLEM. Episode Link: https://kateanthony.com/podcast/episode-324-the-power-of-differentiation-with-tony-overbay/

This is a rebroadcast. The episode originally ran in June 2021. Mike Houghtaling was raised in Bellevue, Washington, and Raleigh, North Carolina, and served in the Argentina Cordoba Mission. He and his family have lived in Georgia for over 30 years. Since entering recovery, he served as a bishop's counselor, a high councilor, and at the time of this recording was serving as the bishop of the Fayetteville Georgia YSA Ward. He worked for the Federal Aviation Administration for 37 years, most of those as an air traffic controller, retiring in 2019. Mike and his wife Andrea have five children and seven grandchildren. Mike tries to work his recovery just one day at a time. Links ODAAT coins Warrior Heart retreat Heart of a Woman retreat Is Elders Quorum Working? Wild at Heart in Church Leadership | An Interview with Doug Nielsen Heart of a Woman in Relief Society Church resources Share your thoughts in the Leading Saints community Get 14-day access to the Core Leader Library Read the transcript of this podcast Highlights Times are approximate, due to differences between the original and rebroadcast audio. 5:10 About Mike's ward and his personal family history 10:30 Discovered pornography at age 10 and immediately fell into addiction and shame 12:30 Sought help from his bishop but the guidance didn't help 15:15 Considered his mission a failure and returned home believing himself the worst of people 17:30 The misunderstanding that marriage and sex would eliminate the problem 19:10 “Porn has no more to do with sex than alcohol has to do with thirst” 20:45 Misunderstanding the difference between sobriety and the healing of recovery, never addressing the shame and wounding 23:00 Hitting rock bottom and finally realizing that he could not hide anymore 26:30 The hopeless concept that everyone protected by the Atonement was under a big umbrella, but he was not under that umbrella 28:30 A tiny thread of hope touched his heart and he began to take the 12 steps seriously and began seeking recovery and healing, not simply sobriety 31:10 Recognition that his wife needed attention for her wounds 33:00 You have to pick up every tool along the way because they can all be helpful 34:00 One helpful tool: Face it, replace it, connect; the power of connection 35:50 Called as a bishop's counselor 36:30 Explanation of PASG: Pornography Addiction Support Group and the spouse support group 41:15 Telling his story to his YSA ward to show that he is relatable and unafraid of their struggles 44:45 Advice for bishops: invite those struggling with addiction to go to an ARP meeting, go with them, study and seek to understand 47:00 “You are not beyond His help, you are not beyond His reach.” 49:00 Advice for stake presidents: take a chance on different candidates for positions of leadership in the Church 50:50 Metaphor of a quilt with one inky square in the shadows 53:00 Still working steps 10, 11, and 12, the maintenance steps 54:30 Advice for those in the circle of a recovering addict: love them, show grace for and connect with them, and continue to point them towards the Savior 56:30 Supporting the addict's family members: connect, encourage, listen, point them toward therapy 58:45 Learning to be a true follower and finding healing in understanding the Savior is what has helped him to be a better leader The award-winning Leading Saints Podcast is one of the top independent Latter-day Saints podcasts as part of nonprofit Leading Saints' mission to help Latter-day Saints be better prepared to lead. Learn more and listen to any of the past episodes for free at LeadingSaints.org. Past guests include Emily Belle Freeman, David Butler, Hank Smith, John Bytheway, Reyna and Elena Aburto, Liz Wiseman, Stephen M. R. Covey, Julie Beck, Brad Wilcox, Jody Moore, Tony Overbay, John H. Groberg, Elaine Dalton, Tad R. Callister, Lynn G. Robbins, J. Devn Cornish, Bonnie Oscarson,

Are you constantly trying to please your mother but never feeling good enough? Do you take responsibility for her emotional well-being? If you've ever found yourself stuck in these patterns, this episode is essential listening — and men, don't skip this one! Host Tony Overbay discovered he might have a little "Good Daughter Syndrome" himself. In this illuminating conversation, psychotherapist Katherine Fabrizio https://daughtersrising.info/ shares her 35 years of experience working with daughters of difficult mothers, including her own journey breaking away from practicing therapy alongside her controlling mother. With refreshing candor and hard-earned wisdom, Katherine reveals: The four psychological traps that keep "good daughters" stuck: the never good enough trap, the guilt trap, the self-doubt trap, and the mixed message trap Why setting even small boundaries can provide crucial data about your relationship How to break free without it being a "zero-sum game" where someone must lose Why your mother's narcissistic defenses will protect her, even when you start setting boundaries The paralyzing internal conflict of feeling selfish when you differentiate from mom With multiple awards, including Gold Medalist for Parenting & Relationships from The Global Book Awards, Katherine's book "The Good Daughter Syndrome" offers hope to those caught in these destructive dynamics. Whether you identify as a "good daughter" or simply want to understand the complex mother-daughter relationship, this conversation provides actionable insights for reclaiming your sovereignty and building a life that truly belongs to you. "When you wake up and realize you've been ceding your sovereignty to somebody else... it's incredibly empowering." - Katherine Fabrizio 00:00 Introduction and Announcements 01:35 Emotional Immaturity Epidemic 03:32 The Good Daughter Syndrome 08:12 Interview with Catherine Fabrizio 11:03 Catherine's Personal Journey 17:37 Understanding Narcissistic Dynamics 26:40 Setting Boundaries with Narcissistic Mothers 27:35 The Never Good Enough Trap 28:40 The Guilt Trap 29:11 Navigating Divorce and Co-Parenting 33:54 The Self-Doubt Trap 38:59 The Mixed Message Trap 46:23 Empowerment and Differentiation 48:53 Conclusion and Resources Are you constantly trying to please your mother but never feeling good enough? Do you take responsibility for her emotional well-being? If you've ever found yourself stuck in these patterns, this episode is essential listening — and men, don't skip this one! Host Tony Overbay discovered he might have a little "Good Daughter Syndrome" himself. In this illuminating conversation, psychotherapist Katherine Fabrizio https://daughtersrising.info/ shares her 35 years of experience working with daughters of difficult mothers, including her own journey breaking away from practicing therapy alongside her controlling mother. With refreshing candor and hard-earned wisdom, Katherine reveals: The four psychological traps that keep "good daughters" stuck: the never good enough trap, the guilt trap, the self-doubt trap, and the mixed message trap Why setting even small boundaries can provide crucial data about your relationship How to break free without it being a "zero-sum game" where someone must lose Why your mother's narcissistic defenses will protect her, even when you start setting boundaries The paralyzing internal conflict of feeling selfish when you differentiate from mom With multiple awards, including Gold Medalist for Parenting & Relationships from The Global Book Awards, Katherine's book "The Good Daughter Syndrome" offers hope to those caught in these destructive dynamics. Whether you identify as a "good daughter" or simply want to understand the complex mother-daughter relationship, this conversation provides actionable insights for reclaiming your sovereignty and building a life that truly belongs to you. "When you wake up and realize you've been ceding your sovereignty to somebody else... it's incredibly empowering." - Katherine Fabrizio 00:00 Introduction and Announcements 01:35 Emotional Immaturity Epidemic 03:32 The Good Daughter Syndrome 08:12 Interview with Catherine Fabrizio 11:03 Catherine's Personal Journey 17:37 Understanding Narcissistic Dynamics 26:40 Setting Boundaries with Narcissistic Mothers 27:35 The Never Good Enough Trap 28:40 The Guilt Trap 29:11 Navigating Divorce and Co-Parenting 33:54 The Self-Doubt Trap 38:59 The Mixed Message Trap 46:23 Empowerment and Differentiation 48:53 Conclusion and Resources

Have you ever watched someone you care about repeatedly return to a relationship that's clearly hurting them, despite all logic and reason? Or found yourself unable to break free from a partner who alternates between cruel indifference and intoxicating affection? Tony Overbay, LMFT, comprehensively examines all of the factors at play in hopes of shining a light on understanding and ultimately healing from one of psychology's most misunderstood phenomena: trauma bonding. Tony explains how the same mechanisms that kept B.F. Skinner's rats frantically pressing a lever for unpredictable rewards are at work in toxic relationships. He explains the biological "amygdala hijack" that literally shuts down one's ability to think rationally when anxiety strikes and why well-meaning advice like "just don't worry about it" actually makes things worse through psychological reactance. This comprehensive episode covers: The neurological science behind trauma bonding and why it creates addiction-like withdrawal symptoms How childhood experiences shape our relationship with emotions and set us up for unhealthy patterns Why telling someone "don't think about it" guarantees they'll think about it more The critical difference between guilt ("I did something bad") and shame ("I am bad") Practical ACT (Acceptance and Commitment Therapy) techniques like expansion and mindfulness The powerful Buddhist salt and water metaphor for managing emotional pain Why no one—not even identical twins—experiences the world exactly as you do How to break the cycle of seeking external validation that keeps you trapped Whether you're personally experiencing a trauma bond, supporting someone who is, or simply want to understand why people stay in painful relationships, this episode provides compassionate insight and practical tools for healing. Tony's conversational style makes complex psychological concepts accessible while offering hope that with time, understanding, and the right support, you can reclaim your emotional autonomy and build healthier connections. 00:00 Introduction: The Impact of 'Say Anything' 01:21 Setting the Stage: Understanding Relationship Dynamics 01:50 Who This Episode is For 03:10 Introduction to Trauma Bonding 04:03 Welcome to the Virtual Couch 04:35 Engage with Us: Social Media and Upcoming Events 07:04 The Concept of Trauma Bonding 16:51 The Science Behind Trauma Bonding 21:25 Understanding the Amygdala Hijack 21:49 The Impact of Stress Hormones on the Brain 23:03 The Cycle of Trauma Bonding 24:21 The Ineffectiveness of Well-Meaning Advice 24:59 Psychological Reactance and the White Bear Effect 26:24 Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) 28:18 The Concept of Expansion 30:05 Mindfulness and Changing Your Relationship with Thoughts 32:27 Guilt vs. Shame 34:11 Healing from Trauma Bonds 36:45 The Importance of Self-Validation 43:43 Seeking Support and Practicing Mindfulness

Calvin Griffin was born in Northern Mississippi, where he grew up and attended high school and college. After graduation he became a franchisee of a successful national pizza chain in New Orleans, and also became engaged to Avemaria Champagne. President and Sister Griffin joined The Church one month apart from each other and have been faithful members for 37 years. They were both professionals in the pharmaceutical industry, and President Griffin worked as a senior category manager for a national pharmaceutical wholesale company. They have five children, ages 24 to 34 years. President Griffin has a strong testimony of Jesus Christ and His role as Savior & Redeemer. He has served in a stake mission presidency, as a ward mission leader, Sunday School teacher, Young Men basketball coach, in an elders quorum presidency and high priest group leadership, as a bishop and stake high councilor, and as a stake presidency counselor. He currently serves as president of the Denton, Texas stake, loves the gospel, and extends an invitation to all to come unto Christ. Links Share your thoughts in the Leading Saints community Transcript coming soon Get 14-day access to the Core Leader Library Highlights President Griffin shares his conversion story and leadership journey. He discusses his experiences as a leader and emphasizes the importance of aligning oneself with prophetic keys and the Spirit. President Griffin highlights the need to expect the unexpected in leadership. He also shares how he connects with and cares for his ward members, despite his busy calling. Highlights coming soon The award-winning Leading Saints Podcast is one of the top independent Latter-day Saints podcasts as part of nonprofit Leading Saints' mission to help Latter-day Saints be better prepared to lead. Learn more and listen to any of the past episodes for free at LeadingSaints.org. Past guests include Emily Belle Freeman, David Butler, Hank Smith, John Bytheway, Reyna and Elena Aburto, Liz Wiseman, Stephen M. R. Covey, Elder Alvin F. Meredith III, Julie Beck, Brad Wilcox, Jody Moore, Tony Overbay, John H. Groberg, Elaine Dalton, Tad R. Callister, Lynn G. Robbins, J. Devn Cornish, Bonnie Oscarson, Dennis B. Neuenschwander, Kirby Heyborne, Taysom Hill Anthony Sweat, John Hilton III, Barbara Morgan Gardner, Blair Hodges, Whitney Johnson, Ryan Gottfredson, Greg McKeown, Ganel-Lyn Condie, Michael Goodman, Wendy Ulrich, Richard Ostler, and many more in over 800 episodes. Discover podcasts, articles, virtual conferences, and live events related to callings such as the bishopric, Relief Society, elders quorum, Primary, youth leadership, stake leadership, ward mission, ward council, young adults, ministering, and teaching.

Jennifer Rockwood is the first and only head coach for the Brigham Young University women's soccer team, a position she has held since 1989 after graduating from BYU. Her teams have over 450 wins and made the NCAA tournament 25 times in 31 years. She talks about her career path and the leadership principles she has relied upon in leading young adult women athletes. This podcast was recorded with a live audience on the 2025 BYU Cruise. Leading Empowered and Confident Young Women | An Interview with Diljeet Taylor Share your thoughts in the Leading Saints community Transcript coming soon Get 14-day access to the Core Leader Library Highlights Coach Rockwood shares her journey into coaching, her philosophy on leadership, team culture, and her experiences coaching at BYU for decades. She emphasizes the importance of leading within one's own personality, fostering a supportive team environment built on love and respect, and navigating the challenges of coaching young athletes. The conversation also touches on recruiting, dealing with parents, the impact of NIL, the transition to the Big 12 conference, and how her faith has influenced her coaching career. [05:03] Jennifer's Background and Journey into Coaching [05:49] Early Competitive Spirit [06:39] Playing Experience at BYU [08:52] Transition to Coaching at BYU [11:53] Influence of High School Coach [16:14] Engaging Young Single Adults (YSA) [17:31] The Importance of Involvement and Overcoming Failure [21:43] Navigating Intense Youth Sports and Church Activities [23:39] Parental Involvement and Pressure in Youth Sports [25:55] The Parent-Coach Relationship [28:17] Establishing and Maintaining Team Culture [29:27] Recruiting and Building Culture from the Start [31:18] Key Elements of Team Culture: Love and Respect [33:07] Leading Within Your Own Personality [35:47] Helping Struggling Players [37:22] One-on-One Interactions with Players [38:37] Dealing with Team Infighting and Maintaining Unity [40:34] Impact of NIL (Name, Image, Likeness) [42:20] Transition to the Big 12 Conference [44:51] Coaching Staff Roles and Coordination [46:53] Encouraging Support for BYU Women's Soccer [48:13] How Coaching Has Influenced Faith The award-winning Leading Saints Podcast is one of the top independent Latter-day Saints podcasts as part of nonprofit Leading Saints' mission to help Latter-day Saints be better prepared to lead. Learn more and listen to any of the past episodes for free at LeadingSaints.org. Past guests include Emily Belle Freeman, David Butler, Hank Smith, John Bytheway, Reyna and Elena Aburto, Liz Wiseman, Stephen M. R. Covey, Elder Alvin F. Meredith III, Julie Beck, Brad Wilcox, Jody Moore, Tony Overbay, John H. Groberg, Elaine Dalton, Tad R. Callister, Lynn G. Robbins, J. Devn Cornish, Bonnie Oscarson, Dennis B. Neuenschwander, Kirby Heyborne, Taysom Hill Anthony Sweat, John Hilton III, Barbara Morgan Gardner, Blair Hodges, Whitney Johnson, Ryan Gottfredson, Greg McKeown, Ganel-Lyn Condie, Michael Goodman, Wendy Ulrich, Richard Ostler, and many more in over 800 episodes. Discover podcasts, articles, virtual conferences, and live events related to callings such as the bishopric, Relief Society, elders quorum, Primary, youth leadership, stake leadership, ward mission, ward council, young adults, ministering, and teaching.

Amy Jo Schenewark holds a bachelor's degree in Human Resources Development and Training from Brigham Young University. She works as a 911 dispatcher and training officer. Amy has served as a ward Relief Society, Young Women, and Primary president, as a Seminary teacher, nursery leader, activity director, and counselor in stake Primary and Relief Society presidencies. She currently serves as a stake Relief Society president. Links Share your thoughts in the Leading Saints community Transcript coming soon Get 14-day access to the Core Leader Library Highlights Coming soon The award-winning Leading Saints Podcast is one of the top independent Latter-day Saints podcasts as part of nonprofit Leading Saints' mission to help Latter-day Saints be better prepared to lead. Learn more and listen to any of the past episodes for free at LeadingSaints.org. Past guests include Emily Belle Freeman, David Butler, Hank Smith, John Bytheway, Reyna and Elena Aburto, Liz Wiseman, Stephen M. R. Covey, Elder Alvin F. Meredith III, Julie Beck, Brad Wilcox, Jody Moore, Tony Overbay, John H. Groberg, Elaine Dalton, Tad R. Callister, Lynn G. Robbins, J. Devn Cornish, Bonnie Oscarson, Dennis B. Neuenschwander, Kirby Heyborne, Taysom Hill Anthony Sweat, John Hilton III, Barbara Morgan Gardner, Blair Hodges, Whitney Johnson, Ryan Gottfredson, Greg McKeown, Ganel-Lyn Condie, Michael Goodman, Wendy Ulrich, Richard Ostler, and many more in over 800 episodes. Discover podcasts, articles, virtual conferences, and live events related to callings such as the bishopric, Relief Society, elders quorum, Primary, youth leadership, stake leadership, ward mission, ward council, young adults, ministering, and teaching.

Do you avoid difficult conversations, hoping problems will magically disappear? Do you convince yourself you don't need to write things down, because of course you'll remember later? Or maybe you catch yourself trying to be everything to everyone… and slowly losing yourself in the process? Join Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist Tony Overbay and his daughter Mackie, a licensed esthetician, and cosmetologist, and host of the podcast “The Mind, the Mirror, and Me,” for a lively and insightful live Q&A. Together, they explore the sneaky ways magical thinking and emotional immaturity show up in our lives and relationships. From assuming people should “just know” what we want, to struggling with overthinking and honesty in relationships, this conversation dives deep (with plenty of humor and personal stories along the way). You'll also hear about: What “pick me” behavior really means and how it impacts relationships How magical thinking keeps us stuck (and how to move forward) Navigating diagnoses like borderline personality disorder and emotional immaturity Why honesty in relationships isn't as simple as “just say it” Handling complicated family dynamics — including emotionally absent grandparents Tools like mindfulness and ACT-based techniques to help you change your relationship with your thoughts Whether you're a therapist, a parent, or simply curious about emotional growth, this honest and relatable episode will leave you thinking differently about how you show up for yourself and others. 00:00 Introduction and Technical Difficulties 00:19 Foot Talk and Live Stream Banter 01:11 Licensed Therapist Q&A Begins 01:21 Understanding Narcissistic Traits 02:06 Exploring the 'Pick Me' Phenomenon 03:20 Therapy Insights: Finding Your True Self 05:40 Addressing Borderline Personality Disorder 14:05 Magical Thinking and Emotional Immaturity 26:08 Mindfulness and Thought Observation Techniques 27:02 The Concept of Changing Relationship with Thoughts 27:32 Discussion on Honesty in Relationships 31:16 Handling Family Dynamics and Expectations 33:54 Understanding Bipolar Disorder vs. Anger Issues 37:43 The Role of Thoughts, Behaviors, and Feelings 46:03 Freudian Theories and Emotional Maturity 50:39 Final Thoughts and Viewer Questions

Rick Reynolds is one of America's foremost authorities helping individuals and couples struggling with affairs and compulsive sexual behaviors, with over 30 years of experience and insight. He holds a master's degree in Social Work and is a clinical member of the American Association of Marriage and Family Therapists. Rick's company, Affair Recovery, offers anonymous online group support worldwide for those impacted by infidelity. Rick has authored numerous guides, curricula, and papers detailing reasons why people cheat, how couples can overcome the pain, heartache, and distrust, as well as ways to move forward, both individually and as a couple. Links AffairRecovery.com Share your thoughts in the Leading Saints community Transcript coming soon Get 14-day access to the Core Leader Library Highlights Rick talks about the complexities of affairs within a Christian context. He shares his personal experience with infidelity [04:32]. He emphasizes the importance of honesty and seeking guidance from God [05:46]. Rick highlights the concept of "trickle truth" as particularly damaging [15:59]. He stresses the need for full disclosure to the betrayed spouse. They explore different types of affairs [12:04]. Rick also offers advice for church leaders on how to support couples dealing with infidelity [12:53]. Rick explains that the betrayed spouse needs help with trauma and understanding [14:53]. He introduces the concept of Complex Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (CPTSD) [21:32]. This condition can significantly hinder the healing process. Rick shares effective treatment methods for trauma [25:29]. He also emphasizes the importance of community and support systems in recovery [33:34]. They discuss the timeline for healing from infidelity [37:14]. Rick also addresses the challenges of navigating relationships with affair partners [40:01]. Rick shares his perspective on involving children in the disclosure process [43:13]. He advocates for prioritizing individual healing before focusing on saving the marriage [45:42]. They explore the reasons why people have affairs [53:39]. Rick also touches on the differences between men and women in affairs [58:21]. He underscores the importance of a strong recovery program for the wayward spouse [01:01:06]. Podcast Chapters 00:04:32 - Rick's Personal Experience 00:11:31 - Defining Infidelity 00:12:53 - Advice for Church Leaders 00:15:59 - The Danger of Trickle Truth 00:21:32 - Understanding CPTSD 00:25:29 - Treating Trauma 00:33:34 - The Importance of Community 00:37:14 - Timeline for Healing 00:40:01 - Navigating Affair Partners 00:43:13 - Involving Children 00:45:42 - Prioritizing Individual Healing 00:53:39 - Reasons for Affairs 00:58:21 - Gender Differences in Affairs 01:01:06 - The Importance of Recovery 01:04:35 - Recommended Resources 01:05:03 - The Role of Faith The award-winning Leading Saints Podcast is one of the top independent Latter-day Saints podcasts as part of nonprofit Leading Saints' mission to help Latter-day Saints be better prepared to lead. Learn more and listen to any of the past episodes for free at LeadingSaints.org. Past guests include Emily Belle Freeman, David Butler, Hank Smith, John Bytheway, Reyna and Elena Aburto, Liz Wiseman, Stephen M. R. Covey, Elder Alvin F. Meredith III, Julie Beck, Brad Wilcox, Jody Moore, Tony Overbay, John H. Groberg, Elaine Dalton, Tad R. Callister, Lynn G. Robbins, J. Devn Cornish, Bonnie Oscarson, Dennis B. Neuenschwander, Kirby Heyborne, Taysom Hill Anthony Sweat, John Hilton III, Barbara Morgan Gardner, Blair Hodges, Whitney Johnson, Ryan Gottfredson, Greg McKeown, Ganel-Lyn Condie, Michael Goodman, Wendy Ulrich, Richard Ostler, and many more in over 800 episodes. Discover podcasts, articles, virtual conferences, and live events related to callings such as the bishopric, Relief Society, elders quorum, Primary, youth leadership, stake leadership, ward mission, ward council, young adults,

Braeden Jensen is a Mental Health Counselor and previously worked as a full-time Seminary teacher. Spending seven years in a high school classroom opened his eyes to a number of things. It changed his ability to listen and sharpened his aptitude for empathy. The more he sat with and listened to students, the more he saw and felt how many people are hurting in very real ways. At the same time, Braeden considered how therapy had helped him find hope and healing. The puzzle pieces quickly came together: "You can help more people in some tangible, substantial ways." After pursuing his Clinical Mental Health Counseling degree, he recently left the classroom full-time to find more fulfillment in helping others enjoy freedom, peace, and healing. He loves seeing people overcome trauma, depression, anxiety, and addiction, and heal their relationships along the way. Links BraedenJensen.com @braejensen on Instagram Share your thoughts in the Leading Saints community Transcript coming soon Get 14-day access to the Core Leader Library Highlights Coming soon The award-winning Leading Saints Podcast is one of the top independent Latter-day Saints podcasts as part of nonprofit Leading Saints' mission to help Latter-day Saints be better prepared to lead. Learn more and listen to any of the past episodes for free at LeadingSaints.org. Past guests include Emily Belle Freeman, David Butler, Hank Smith, John Bytheway, Reyna and Elena Aburto, Liz Wiseman, Stephen M. R. Covey, Elder Alvin F. Meredith III, Julie Beck, Brad Wilcox, Jody Moore, Tony Overbay, John H. Groberg, Elaine Dalton, Tad R. Callister, Lynn G. Robbins, J. Devn Cornish, Bonnie Oscarson, Dennis B. Neuenschwander, Kirby Heyborne, Taysom Hill Anthony Sweat, John Hilton III, Barbara Morgan Gardner, Blair Hodges, Whitney Johnson, Ryan Gottfredson, Greg McKeown, Ganel-Lyn Condie, Michael Goodman, Wendy Ulrich, Richard Ostler, and many more in over 800 episodes. Discover podcasts, articles, virtual conferences, and live events related to callings such as the bishopric, Relief Society, elders quorum, Primary, youth leadership, stake leadership, ward mission, ward council, young adults, ministering, and teaching.

Ever wondered why your brilliant mind can solve complex problems at work but completely breaks down during relationship conflicts? That's because those emotional reactions that feel so instinctive aren't flaws—they're actually genius survival strategies that once kept you safe. In this transformative episode, we explore how black-and-white thinking, mind-reading expectations, and external validation seeking were perfect childhood adaptations that have now become relationship roadblocks. Through the groundbreaking insight that behaviors which perfectly served us in childhood often become the very patterns that sabotage our adult relationships, you'll finally understand why you keep falling into familiar emotional patterns despite your best intentions. This isn't just another episode about relationship struggles—it's a compassionate roadmap for emotional growth that honors both your wounded inner child and your emerging adult self. You'll discover how to recognize when you're in an emotional "hole" and why continuing to dig with familiar tools only takes you deeper. Most importantly, you'll learn how to pass the baton from your protective inner child to your capable adult self without shame or judgment. Whether you struggle with people-pleasing, emotional flooding, perfectionism, or control issues, this episode offers a strength-based approach to transform these patterns into mature responses that will revolutionize your relationships and bring a profound sense of internal peace. 00:00 Introduction and Episode Overview 00:23 Listener Email: Mark's Story 01:41 Understanding Emotional Immaturity 04:47 Exploring the Emotional Maturity Spectrum 08:47 Introducing the Emotional Architects Group 09:29 Narcissistic Personality Disorder vs. Emotional Immaturity 11:08 Dinner with Daniel: A Narcissistic Narrative 15:47 Stages of Emotional Maturity 26:18 Childhood Behaviors in Adult Bodies 32:45 Understanding Emotional Blueprints 33:07 Re-parenting with Compassion 33:32 Therapeutic Insights from Fiction 34:23 Frozen Moments and Adult Relationships 35:16 Childhood Adaptations in Adult Life 36:17 Exploring Childlike Behaviors in Adults 36:57 Navigating Emotional Development 41:34 Black or White Thinking 44:43 Magical Thinking in Relationships 47:46 Emotional Reasoning and Codependency 52:32 External Validation and Accountability 55:41 Mind Reading and Projection 01:01:32 Pattern Recognition and Familiarity 01:07:12 Path Toward Emotional Maturity 01:07:52 Conclusion and Next Steps

Ever wondered why your brilliant mind can solve complex problems at work but completely breaks down during relationship conflicts? That's because those emotional reactions that feel so instinctive aren't flaws—they're actually genius survival strategies that once kept you safe. In this transformative episode, we explore how black-and-white thinking, mind-reading expectations, and external validation seeking were perfect childhood adaptations that have now become relationship roadblocks. Through the groundbreaking insight that behaviors which perfectly served us in childhood often become the very patterns that sabotage our adult relationships, you'll finally understand why you keep falling into familiar emotional patterns despite your best intentions. This isn't just another episode about relationship struggles—it's a compassionate roadmap for emotional growth that honors both your wounded inner child and your emerging adult self. You'll discover how to recognize when you're in an emotional "hole" and why continuing to dig with familiar tools only takes you deeper. Most importantly, you'll learn how to pass the baton from your protective inner child to your capable adult self without shame or judgment. Whether you struggle with people-pleasing, emotional flooding, perfectionism, or control issues, this episode offers a strength-based approach to transform these patterns into mature responses that will revolutionize your relationships and bring a profound sense of internal peace. 00:00 Introduction and Episode Overview 00:23 Listener Email: Mark's Story 01:41 Understanding Emotional Immaturity 04:47 Exploring the Emotional Maturity Spectrum 08:47 Introducing the Emotional Architects Group 09:29 Narcissistic Personality Disorder vs. Emotional Immaturity 11:08 Dinner with Daniel: A Narcissistic Narrative 15:47 Stages of Emotional Maturity 26:18 Childhood Behaviors in Adult Bodies 32:45 Understanding Emotional Blueprints 33:07 Re-parenting with Compassion 33:32 Therapeutic Insights from Fiction 34:23 Frozen Moments and Adult Relationships 35:16 Childhood Adaptations in Adult Life 36:17 Exploring Childlike Behaviors in Adults 36:57 Navigating Emotional Development 41:34 Black or White Thinking 44:43 Magical Thinking in Relationships 47:46 Emotional Reasoning and Codependency 52:32 External Validation and Accountability 55:41 Mind Reading and Projection 01:01:32 Pattern Recognition and Familiarity 01:07:12 Path Toward Emotional Maturity 01:07:52 Conclusion and Next Steps

Kristy Wheelwright Taylor serves as the board secretary for the Wilford Woodruff Papers Foundation and helps with transcription and writing on the Wilford Woodruff Papers Project. Her book, Prepare Me for Thy Use: Lessons from Wilford Woodruff's Mission Years, will be published on May 12 by Deseret Book and BYU's Religious Studies Center. Kristy has a masters degree in Humanities from Brigham Young University and has worked as an English Instructor at Purdue University, a copy editor, technical writer, travel writer, and historical researcher and writer. She has enjoyed serving in a variety of callings in Primary, Young Women, Relief Society, family history, and the stake communications council; she currently serves as the stake Relief Society president in Trophy Club, Texas. Links Prepare Me for Thy Use: Lessons from Wilford Woodruff's Mission Years Developing Wilford Woodruff as a Leader | An Interview with Steven Wheelwright Share your thoughts in the Leading Saints community Transcript coming soon Get 14-day access to the Core Leader Library Highlights This discussion highlights the Wilford Woodruff Papers project, which aims to compile and make accessible all writings related to Woodruff. Kristy shares her family's connection to this project and her experiences as a stake Relief Society president in Texas. Kristy emphasizes the importance of unity among Church leaders and fostering doctrinal confidence among women. She encourages open discussions about challenging topics, such as garments and temple recommends, to help leaders feel prepared. By sharing personal stories and insights from Wilford Woodruff, Kristy illustrates how sincere testimonies can strengthen relationships within the Church. She highlights the beauty of the plan of salvation and the joy it brings to those who follow Jesus Christ. 05:03 - Connection to Wilford Woodruff 06:56 - The Wilford Woodruff Papers Project 09:08 - Overview of Kristy's Book 10:00 - Kristy's Role as Stake Relief Society President 11:07 - Support from Stake Leadership 11:47 - Changes in Stake Leadership Sundays 12:47 - Demographics of the Stake 12:49 - Engaging with the Wards 14:31 - Building Relationships with Ward Leaders 15:38 - Common Challenges in Relief Society 19:29 - Unity in Leadership 20:36 - Importance of Sincere Testimonies 22:42 - Fostering Doctrinal Confidence 27:26 - Encouraging Open Discussions 29:49 - Addressing Hard Questions 32:24 - Collaborating with Other Leaders 36:21 - Normalizing Difficult Conversations 40:36 - The Role of Problem Solving in Leadership The award-winning Leading Saints Podcast is one of the top independent Latter-day Saints podcasts as part of nonprofit Leading Saints' mission to help Latter-day Saints be better prepared to lead. Learn more and listen to any of the past episodes for free at LeadingSaints.org. Past guests include Emily Belle Freeman, David Butler, Hank Smith, John Bytheway, Reyna and Elena Aburto, Liz Wiseman, Stephen M. R. Covey, Elder Alvin F. Meredith III, Julie Beck, Brad Wilcox, Jody Moore, Tony Overbay, John H. Groberg, Elaine Dalton, Tad R. Callister, Lynn G. Robbins, J. Devn Cornish, Bonnie Oscarson, Dennis B. Neuenschwander, Kirby Heyborne, Taysom Hill Anthony Sweat, John Hilton III, Barbara Morgan Gardner, Blair Hodges, Whitney Johnson, Ryan Gottfredson, Greg McKeown, Ganel-Lyn Condie, Michael Goodman, Wendy Ulrich, Richard Ostler, and many more in over 800 episodes. Discover podcasts, articles, virtual conferences, and live events related to callings such as the bishopric, Relief Society, elders quorum, Primary, youth leadership, stake leadership, ward mission, ward council, young adults, ministering, and teaching.

Brian J. Willoughby, Ph.D. is a professor in the School of Family Life at Brigham Young University and a research fellow at The Wheatley Institute. He received a bachelor's degree in Psychology from BYU and masters and doctoral degrees in Family Social Science from the University of Minnesota. Brian's research generally focuses on how adolescents, young adults, and adults move toward and form long-term committed relationships, and has been widely cited in the media. He is also the author of The Millennial Marriage and The Marriage Paradox: Why Emerging Adults Love Marriage Yet Push it Aside. Brian and his wife Cassi have been married for 23 years and they have four children. Links Wheatley Institute research reports Addressing Pornography Share your thoughts in the Leading Saints community Transcript coming soon Get 14-day access to the Core Leader Library Highlights Kurt and Brian discuss the complexities of pornography use within religious contexts. Brian emphasizes that young adults will encounter pornography, often leading to shame and guilt. He highlights the importance of understanding the motivations behind pornography use, which can range from curiosity to emotional coping mechanisms. Brian also addresses the stigma surrounding addiction labels. He explains that only about 10% of users experience compulsive behavior, while many others face problematic use. Church leaders should focus on creating a safe environment for youth to discuss these issues. By asking questions about triggers and providing coping strategies, leaders can help youth navigate their experiences. Brian encourages a balanced approach to discussing pornography, emphasizing hope, understanding, and the potential for growth through repentance. 03:35 - Brian Willoughby's Expertise in Pornography Research 04:26 - Overview of BYU and the Wheatley Institute 05:57 - Research Impact on Policy and Society 06:57 - Teaching Future Therapists and Family Studies 07:37 - The Stigma of Pornography in Religious Contexts 08:50 - Understanding the Broader Impact of Pornography 09:51 - Meta-Analyses and Key Findings on Pornography 11:38 - The Concept of Addiction and Compulsive Behavior 12:58 - Potential for DSM Inclusion of Hypersexual Disorder 13:47 - Brain Chemistry and Pornography Use 15:29 - Distinction Between Addictive and Problematic Use 17:34 - Scripting Expectations from Pornography 19:24 - Social Media and Its Impact on Mental Health 20:34 - The Need for Open Conversations About Pornography 21:09 - The Role of Church Leaders in Addressing Pornography 22:13 - The Importance of Avoiding Labels of Addiction 23:47 - Understanding Youth Experiences with Pornography 25:56 - The Normative Context of Pornography Use 27:06 - Creating Positive Conversations Around Pornography 28:51 - The Role of Fear and Anxiety in Youth Discussions 30:05 - Normalizing Sin and Repentance 31:04 - Distinction Between Guilt and Shame 34:02 - Motivating Youth Through Guilt vs. Shame 36:57 - The Importance of Understanding Triggers 39:11 - Building Coping Skills for Youth 41:27 - Final Thoughts on Support and Guidance The award-winning Leading Saints Podcast is one of the top independent Latter-day Saints podcasts as part of nonprofit Leading Saints' mission to help Latter-day Saints be better prepared to lead. Learn more and listen to any of the past episodes for free at LeadingSaints.org. Past guests include Emily Belle Freeman, David Butler, Hank Smith, John Bytheway, Reyna and Elena Aburto, Liz Wiseman, Stephen M. R. Covey, Elder Alvin F. Meredith III, Julie Beck, Brad Wilcox, Jody Moore, Tony Overbay, John H. Groberg, Elaine Dalton, Tad R. Callister, Lynn G. Robbins, J. Devn Cornish, Bonnie Oscarson, Dennis B. Neuenschwander, Kirby Heyborne, Taysom Hill Anthony Sweat, John Hilton III, Barbara Morgan Gardner, Blair Hodges, Whitney Johnson, Ryan Gottfredson, Greg McKeown, Ganel-Lyn Condie, Michael Goodman, Wendy Ulrich, Richard Ostler,

Ned McArthur is a fellow of the International Board of Functional Neurology, was in private practice as a chiropractor in Orem, Utah, for 25 years, and now works with Integrated Pain Specialists, a multidisciplinary pain clinic in South Jordan, Utah. He served a mission in Dallas, Texas, and has served in the Church as an elders quorum president, ward executive secretary, ward mission leader, Young Men president, Varsity Scout leader, and youth Sunday School teacher. He currently serves as priests quorum high adventure specialist, as a Primary teacher, and a temple worker. Links Share your thoughts in the Leading Saints community. Transcript coming soon Scriptures referenced in this podcast: Moses 6:63, 1 Nephi 18:3 Get 14-day access to the Core Leader Library Highlights Ned explores the importance of high adventure activities in developing character and spiritual growth among youth. He shares his journey in youth leadership, emphasizing the need for proactive communication with parents and the significance of creating a supportive environment. He highlights the planning process for high adventure experiences, including engaging youth in decision-making and preparing them through various activities. Ned also discusses the spiritual aspects of these adventures, encouraging youth to find Jesus in their experiences. He shares personal anecdotes that illustrate how these activities foster camaraderie and personal growth. 02:51 - Exploring High Adventure Activities 05:08 - Ned's Background in Young Mens Leadership 10:10 - The Importance of Proactive Leadership 12:13 - Developing a High Adventure Program 16:05 - Planning Party for Youth Activities 20:52 - Preparing for the Backpacking Adventure 24:36 - Budgeting for High Adventure Activities 26:10 - Effective Communication with Parents 30:02 - Engaging with Parents for Support 32:10 - Finding Jesus in High Adventure 38:43 - The Power of Prayer in Activities 42:15 - Building a Supportive Culture Among Youth The award-winning Leading Saints Podcast is one of the top independent Latter-day Saints podcasts as part of nonprofit Leading Saints' mission to help Latter-day Saints be better prepared to lead. Learn more and listen to any of the past episodes for free at LeadingSaints.org. Past guests include Emily Belle Freeman, David Butler, Hank Smith, John Bytheway, Reyna and Elena Aburto, Liz Wiseman, Stephen M. R. Covey, Elder Alvin F. Meredith III, Julie Beck, Brad Wilcox, Jody Moore, Tony Overbay, John H. Groberg, Elaine Dalton, Tad R. Callister, Lynn G. Robbins, J. Devn Cornish, Bonnie Oscarson, Dennis B. Neuenschwander, Kirby Heyborne, Taysom Hill Anthony Sweat, John Hilton III, Barbara Morgan Gardner, Blair Hodges, Whitney Johnson, Ryan Gottfredson, Greg McKeown, Ganel-Lyn Condie, Michael Goodman, Wendy Ulrich, Richard Ostler, and many more in over 800 episodes. Discover podcasts, articles, virtual conferences, and live events related to callings such as the bishopric, Relief Society, elders quorum, Primary, youth leadership, stake leadership, ward mission, ward council, young adults, ministering, and teaching.

John Eldredge is a New York Times bestselling author, counselor, and teacher who has inspired millions to go deeper in their relationship with Jesus. He is also president of Wild at Heart, a ministry devoted to helping people discover the heart of God, recover their own hearts in God's love, and learn to live in God's kingdom. John and his wife, Stasi, live in Colorado Springs, Colorado. His new book, Experience Jesus. Really. is available now. Links Reconnecting with God as a Distracted Church Leader | An Interview with John Eldredge Helping Others Restore Personal Worship & Connection with God | An Interview with John Eldredge Experience Jesus. Really: Finding Refuge, Strength, and Wonder through Everyday Encounters with God Wild at Heart: Discovering the Secret of a Man's Soul WildatHeart.org Share your thoughts in the Leading Saints community. Transcript coming soon Get 14-day access to the Core Leader Library Highlights John shares insights from his extensive background as a therapist and author. He encourages listeners to embrace a more experiential relationship with God. John argues that many Christians overlook the importance of intimacy with the divine, often focusing too heavily on intellectual understanding. By inviting God into everyday decisions, individuals can cultivate a deeper spiritual life and seek joy and connection with God in their daily lives. 01:50 - Introduction of John Eldredge 02:30 - John's Background and Work 04:00 - Impact of "Wild at Heart" 05:00 - Evolving Insights on Men's Needs 06:30 - Addressing Modern Challenges for Men 08:00 - The Importance of Validation for Men 09:30 - Engaging Men in Spiritual Discussions 11:00 - Check-in Practices for Men's Groups 12:30 - Spectrogram Activity Reflection 14:00 - Addressing the "I'm Fine" Mentality 15:30 - Entry Points for Men's Retreats 17:00 - Importance of Purpose and Meaning 18:00 - Introduction to "Experience Jesus Really" 19:30 - The Trilogy of John's Books 20:30 - The Need for Experiential Faith 22:00 - The Impact of Internet Life on Spirituality 23:30 - Seeking Rest in God 25:00 - The Role of Desire in Spiritual Life 26:30 - The Concept of Spiritual Amphibians 28:00 - Inviting God into Daily Life 29:30 - The Importance of Mysticism in Faith 31:00 - Understanding Mysticism in Christianity 32:30 - The Need for Experiential Connection with God 34:00 - Ordinary Mystics and Childlike Wonder 35:30 - The Relationship Between Left and Right Brain 37:00 - The Role of Relational Connection in Faith 38:30 - Reframing Mysticism as Experiential Faith 40:00 - Finding God in Creation 41:30 - Communing with God Through Worship 43:00 - Conclusion and Final Thoughts on Experiencing God The award-winning Leading Saints Podcast is one of the top independent Latter-day Saints podcasts as part of nonprofit Leading Saints' mission to help Latter-day Saints be better prepared to lead. Learn more and listen to any of the past episodes for free at LeadingSaints.org. Past guests include Emily Belle Freeman, David Butler, Hank Smith, John Bytheway, Reyna and Elena Aburto, Liz Wiseman, Stephen M. R. Covey, Elder Alvin F. Meredith III, Julie Beck, Brad Wilcox, Jody Moore, Tony Overbay, John H. Groberg, Elaine Dalton, Tad R. Callister, Lynn G. Robbins, J. Devn Cornish, Bonnie Oscarson, Dennis B. Neuenschwander, Kirby Heyborne, Taysom Hill Anthony Sweat, John Hilton III, Barbara Morgan Gardner, Blair Hodges, Whitney Johnson, Ryan Gottfredson, Greg McKeown, Ganel-Lyn Condie, Michael Goodman, Wendy Ulrich, Richard Ostler, and many more in over 800 episodes. Discover podcasts, articles, virtual conferences, and live events related to callings such as the bishopric, Relief Society, elders quorum, Primary, youth leadership, stake leadership, ward mission, ward council, young adults, ministering, and teaching.

Adam Broderick served a mission in Kyiv, Ukraine. He went on to earn a PhD in Chemical Engineering, and is a devoted husband and father of four. Adam was recently released as an elders quorum president, has previously served as a counselor in the bishopric, ward mission leader, and stake Young Men counselor, and has just been called as stake Sunday School president. Adam enjoys outdoor adventures like peak bagging, rock climbing, backpacking, ice climbing, and canyoneering. A runner and cyclist, he also enjoys playing the piano. Links The Art of Gathering, by Priya Parker Share your thoughts in the Leading Saints community Read the transcript of this podcast Get 14-day access to the Core Leader Library Highlights Adam reflects on his three years as elders quorum president, recalling the initial challenge of revitalizing a stagnant quorum after the pandemic. His quorum includes a diverse mix of young adults and seniors, which made fostering meaningful connections essential. To lead effectively, Adam prioritized creating a safe space for open discussions, believing connection must come before impactful gospel instruction. He shares practical strategies, such as beginning meetings with personal check-ins and setting ground rules to encourage trust and honesty. These efforts helped members feel heard and valued. The discussion shifts to ministering, where Adam stresses the importance of building personal connections during interviews. Instead of administrative check-ins, he promotes genuine conversations about members' lives to create a culture of support and vulnerability. Adam also introduced interest-based activities outside regular meetings, which strengthened camaraderie. Additionally, informal tools like WhatsApp have kept members connected and supported between gatherings, enhancing the sense of community. 04:10 - Adam's Location and Temple Proximity 05:17 - Adam's Profession and Role 06:02 - Adam's Experience as Elders Quorum President 07:06 - Challenges of Reintegrating After COVID 08:02 - Demographics of the Quorum 08:59 - Meeting Locations and Challenges 09:46 - Initial Steps as Elders Quorum President 10:50 - Focus on Ministering Assignments 12:05 - Building Connection and Unity 13:10 - Moving from Ideal to Reality in Lessons 18:30 - Importance of Vulnerability in Discussions 20:12 - Engaging Different Groups in Lessons 24:51 - Real-Life Example: Discussing Blessings 30:01 - Connection Precedes Meaningful Instruction 30:44 - Creating Ground Rules for Safety 35:03 - Connection Outside Sunday Meetings 39:58 - Interest-Based Micro Groups 40:33 - Managing Activities and Engagement 41:22 - Using WhatsApp for Communication 44:40 - Ministering to the Ministers 47:51 - Conclusion and Final Thoughts The award-winning Leading Saints Podcast is one of the top independent Latter-day Saints podcasts as part of nonprofit Leading Saints' mission to help Latter-day Saints be better prepared to lead. Learn more and listen to any of the past episodes for free at LeadingSaints.org. Past guests include Emily Belle Freeman, David Butler, Hank Smith, John Bytheway, Reyna and Elena Aburto, Liz Wiseman, Stephen M. R. Covey, Elder Alvin F. Meredith III, Julie Beck, Brad Wilcox, Jody Moore, Tony Overbay, John H. Groberg, Elaine Dalton, Tad R. Callister, Lynn G. Robbins, J. Devn Cornish, Bonnie Oscarson, Dennis B. Neuenschwander, Kirby Heyborne, Taysom Hill Anthony Sweat, John Hilton III, Barbara Morgan Gardner, Blair Hodges, Whitney Johnson, Ryan Gottfredson, Greg McKeown, Ganel-Lyn Condie, Michael Goodman, Wendy Ulrich, Richard Ostler, and many more in over 800 episodes. Discover podcasts, articles, virtual conferences, and live events related to callings such as the bishopric, Relief Society, elders quorum, Primary, youth leadership, stake leadership, ward mission, ward council, young adults, ministering, and teaching.

What if your elders quorum could be completely transformed? One elders quorum president has a bold new vision that could reshape Latter-day Saint priesthood meetings, service efforts, and quorum unity. Hayden Holm, co-host of Salty Saints, and guest Daniel Ockey—an Elders Quorum president from Charlotte, North Carolina—shares an innovative approach to revitalizing the elders quorum experience. Daniel's bold new vision could reshape meetings, service efforts, and quorum unity, potentially changing ward culture, ministering, and priesthood responsibilities for the better. This is a rebroadcast of the original conversation from Salty Saints. Links Share your thoughts in the Leading Saints community Transcript coming soon Get 14-day access to the Core Leader Library Highlights Daniel shares his experiences in his newly formed ward, where he describes the challenges of leading a smaller elders quorum that lacked teachers and faced a diverse demographic, from new fathers to retirees. Daniel candidly reflects on his own disillusionment with traditional elders quorum meetings, which often felt unengaging and disconnected. Inspired by a Christian men's group he attended, he implemented a round-table format with snacks to foster socialization and brotherhood among the members. This approach encourages men to bond over food and engage in meaningful discussions, breaking away from the typical lecture-style meetings. Daniel also introduced anonymous surveys to identify the needs and challenges faced by the brethren, allowing for more relevant and impactful discussions during meetings. He shares examples of the types of questions raised, such as concerns about worthiness to take the sacrament and the struggle of helping children return to church. The episode emphasizes the importance of creating a welcoming and engaging environment in elders quorum, where members feel comfortable sharing their struggles and seeking support. Daniel's initiatives have led to increased attendance and participation, with even members from other wards joining in. He encourages other elders quorum presidencies to seek inspiration through prayer and to be open to change, ultimately aiming to create a more vibrant and supportive community within the church. 01:55 - Introduction to Salty Saints YouTube Channel 02:38 - Interview with Daniel Oki, Elders Quorum President 03:46 - Description of Daniel's Ward and Elders Quorum 05:05 - Discussion on the Demographics of the Ward 06:43 - Daniel's Experience with Elders Quorum 08:15 - Changing the Elders Quorum Experience 08:49 - Implementing Round Tables and Snacks 10:43 - Creating a Comfortable Social Environment 12:27 - Importance of Engaging Discussions 13:42 - Anonymous Surveys for Needs and Challenges 15:05 - Addressing Difficult Questions in Elders Quorum 16:15 - Moving Beyond Fluff in Lessons 17:15 - Utilizing Church Resources for Discussions 18:04 - Positive Changes in Elders Quorum Attendance 19:28 - Daniel's Approach to Leadership and Change 21:09 - Engagement and Feedback from the Relief Society 22:07 - Setting Up and Taking Down Tables 24:07 - Positive Reception from High Priests 25:12 - Sisters' Reactions to the Changes 26:09 - Advice for Elders Quorum Presidencies 29:34 - Encouragement for Elders Seeking Connection The award-winning Leading Saints Podcast is one of the top independent Latter-day Saints podcasts as part of nonprofit Leading Saints' mission to help Latter-day Saints be better prepared to lead. Learn more and listen to any of the past episodes for free at LeadingSaints.org. Past guests include Emily Belle Freeman, David Butler, Hank Smith, John Bytheway, Reyna and Elena Aburto, Liz Wiseman, Stephen M. R. Covey, Elder Alvin F. Meredith III, Julie Beck, Brad Wilcox, Jody Moore, Tony Overbay, John H. Groberg, Elaine Dalton, Tad R. Callister, Lynn G. Robbins, J. Devn Cornish, Bonnie Oscarson, Dennis B. Neuenschwander, Kirby Heyborne,

Have you ever found yourself wondering, How can someone possibly believe that? Or maybe you've questioned your own beliefs after bumping up against someone else's certainty? You're not alone. In this episode, Tony Overbay, LMFT, dives into the complexities of perception, truth, and emotional maturity. He explores how individuals often encounter differing viewpoints—especially in today's social media-driven world—and how those experiences can lead to frustration, confusion, and even self-doubt. Using concepts like Umwelt and the importance of distinguishing between objective facts and subjective experiences, Tony offers insight into how each person's unique background and personal history shape the way they see and move through the world. Through personal stories and reflections, he emphasizes the power of curiosity, empathy, and openness in building real, meaningful connections. Tony also shares parts of his own professional and spiritual journey, including the impact of his faith crisis, and how discomfort can often become a catalyst for deep personal growth. He reflects on the therapist-client relationship, unpacking the balance between professional boundaries and genuine emotional connection. And as always, Tony encourages listeners to embrace curiosity, hold healthy boundaries, and continue showing up as their most authentic selves. 00:00 Introduction: The Frustration of Misunderstanding 02:11 Exploring the Concept of 'Truth' 03:08 Host Introduction and Social Media Presence 04:21 Personal Story: Spinal Surgery Experience 05:26 Diving into the Topic of 'Truth' and Perception 07:15 The German Concept of Umwelt 12:22 Faith Journeys and Personal Perceptions 14:41 Emotional Maturity and Sense of Self 27:53 Job Interviews and Authenticity 32:13 Case Study: Spiritual Expectations 35:42 Thriving Without Sleep 35:52 The Faith Crisis Hits 35:59 Understanding the Pendulum Swing 36:15 Unique Faith Journeys 37:06 Embracing Personal Growth 37:25 The Beauty of Diverse Faith Outcomes 37:48 Navigating Faith Deconstruction 38:42 The Reframe: Moving Forward 38:53 Faith in Yourself and God 39:06 Riding Without Training Wheels 39:31 Respecting Different Journeys 40:04 The Hero's Journey 40:21 Helping Others Through Faith Crisis 40:56 Developing a Strong Sense of Self 41:29 Working with Faith Leaders 42:03 Emotional Immaturity in Faith Communities 42:41 The Power of Parables 43:14 Unspoken Pressures in Religious Settings 43:44 The Hypothetical Couple: Jack and Jill 45:59 Humanistic Therapy Principles 47:46 Intermittent Reinforcement and Trauma Bonding 48:58 The Four Pillars of a Connected Conversation 50:57 Separating Observations from Judgments 56:25 The Therapist's Emotional Journey 58:06 The Paradox of Therapy 01:02:11 Navigating Discomfort in Relationships 01:04:20 Concluding Thoughts and Encouragement

Have you ever found yourself wondering, How can someone possibly believe that? Or maybe you've questioned your own beliefs after bumping up against someone else's certainty? You're not alone. In this episode, Tony Overbay, LMFT, dives into the complexities of perception, truth, and emotional maturity. He explores how individuals often encounter differing viewpoints—especially in today's social media-driven world—and how those experiences can lead to frustration, confusion, and even self-doubt. Using concepts like Umwelt and the importance of distinguishing between objective facts and subjective experiences, Tony offers insight into how each person's unique background and personal history shape the way they see and move through the world. Through personal stories and reflections, he emphasizes the power of curiosity, empathy, and openness in building real, meaningful connections. Tony also shares parts of his own professional and spiritual journey, including the impact of his faith crisis, and how discomfort can often become a catalyst for deep personal growth. He reflects on the therapist-client relationship, unpacking the balance between professional boundaries and genuine emotional connection. And as always, Tony encourages listeners to embrace curiosity, hold healthy boundaries, and continue showing up as their most authentic selves. 00:00 Introduction: The Frustration of Misunderstanding 02:11 Exploring the Concept of 'Truth' 03:08 Host Introduction and Social Media Presence 04:21 Personal Story: Spinal Surgery Experience 05:26 Diving into the Topic of 'Truth' and Perception 07:15 The German Concept of Umwelt 12:22 Faith Journeys and Personal Perceptions 14:41 Emotional Maturity and Sense of Self 27:53 Job Interviews and Authenticity 32:13 Case Study: Spiritual Expectations 35:42 Thriving Without Sleep 35:52 The Faith Crisis Hits 35:59 Understanding the Pendulum Swing 36:15 Unique Faith Journeys 37:06 Embracing Personal Growth 37:25 The Beauty of Diverse Faith Outcomes 37:48 Navigating Faith Deconstruction 38:42 The Reframe: Moving Forward 38:53 Faith in Yourself and God 39:06 Riding Without Training Wheels 39:31 Respecting Different Journeys 40:04 The Hero's Journey 40:21 Helping Others Through Faith Crisis 40:56 Developing a Strong Sense of Self 41:29 Working with Faith Leaders 42:03 Emotional Immaturity in Faith Communities 42:41 The Power of Parables 43:14 Unspoken Pressures in Religious Settings 43:44 The Hypothetical Couple: Jack and Jill 45:59 Humanistic Therapy Principles 47:46 Intermittent Reinforcement and Trauma Bonding 48:58 The Four Pillars of a Connected Conversation 50:57 Separating Observations from Judgments 56:25 The Therapist's Emotional Journey 58:06 The Paradox of Therapy 01:02:11 Navigating Discomfort in Relationships 01:04:20 Concluding Thoughts and Encouragement

This is a rebroadcast. The episode originally ran in July 2020. David Butler is a religious educator at Utah Valley University. He also cohosts the popular YouTube scripture study channel Don't Miss This and is the author of many religious books, including Almighty: How the Most Powerful Being in the Universe Is Also Your Loving Father, Redeemer: Who He Is and Who He Will Always Be, and Spirit: The Gift that Connects You to Heaven. David has previously served as a bishop. He and his wife Jenny are the parents of six children. Links Don't Miss This, a Come Follow Me podcast Instagram: @mrdavebutler @dontmissthisstudy Books by David Butler Y Religion podcast Seekers Wanted | An Interview with Anthony Sweat Church Doctrine, Policy, & Leadership | An Interview with Prof. Anthony SweatHighlights Share your thoughts in the Leading Saints community Transcript coming soon Get 14-day access to the Core Leader Library 11:00 The "rules" of the church and do they really need to be that way? 12:45 What if we put people first in the church? 15:30 Begin with people and purposes 17:30 How to focus on people as a leader 20:30 Making sacrament meeting an experience with God and a place that people want to come back to 22:00 Having a vision with sacrament meeting 23:30 Splitting the ward into groups and teaching about the Savior and the importance of sacrament meeting 30:30 High council speakers 31:30 Stake presidency respecting the role of the bishop 35:00 How do I show devotion to God? 37:00 We all worship differently 39:00 Come Follow Me and Don't Miss This 40:00 Finding grace in Come follow me 42:00 We shouldn't worry about how we're doing Come follow me but worry about meeting our family's needs 44:30 Come follow me takes planning 47:00 Our culture of shame 48:30 "God isn't disappointed in what we haven't done" 49:00 Teaching in a position of grace 50:30 "People who feel loved, loved well" 53:00 Don't confuse salvation with discipleship 56:00 Fear of God compared to fear of sin 58:00 Satan teaches us to fear God just like with Adam and Eve 1:01:00 God's government is a family 1:08:10 BONUS INTERVIEW with Anthony Sweat The award-winning Leading Saints Podcast is one of the top independent Latter-day Saints podcasts as part of nonprofit Leading Saints' mission to help Latter-day Saints be better prepared to lead. Learn more and listen to any of the past episodes for free at LeadingSaints.org. Past guests include Emily Belle Freeman, Hank Smith, John Bytheway, Reyna and Elena Aburto, Liz Wiseman, Stephen M. R. Covey, Julie Beck, Brad Wilcox, Jody Moore, Tony Overbay, John H. Groberg, Elaine Dalton, Tad R. Callister, Lynn G. Robbins, J. Devn Cornish, Bonnie Oscarson, Dennis B. Neuenschwander, Anthony Sweat, John Hilton III, Barbara Morgan Gardner, Blair Hodges, Whitney Johnson, Ryan Gottfredson, Greg McKeown, Ganel-Lyn Condie, Michael Goodman, Wendy Ulrich, Richard Ostler, Kirby Heyborne, Taysom Hill and many more in over 800 episodes. Discover podcasts, articles, virtual conferences, and live events related to callings such as the bishopric, Relief Society, elders quorum, Primary, youth leadership, stake leadership, ward mission, ward council, young adults, ministering, and teaching.

Gary Miller is the host of the "Hope In Him Today" and "Outside The Lane" podcasts. Before joining The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, he served as an independent fundamental Baptist pastor. He spent 11 years in the United States Air Force, dividing his time between critical care medicine and professional development training as a master military training instructor. He holds a B.S. from Wayland Baptist University and studied theology at Liberty Theological Seminary. Currently, he works as a director of marketing for a Salt Lake City-based insurance firm and serves as a stake high councilor in the Katy Texas Stake. He and his wife, Crystal, live in Katy, Texas, with their four children. You'll likely find him at a NASCAR race somewhere when he's not doing these things. Links From Baptist Preacher to Latter-day Saint | An Interview with Gary Miller Hope in Him Today podcast Outside the Lane podcast Share your thoughts in the Leading Saints community Read the transcript of this podcast Get 14-day access to the Core Leader Library Highlights This conversation delves into Gary's journey of faith, focusing on the challenges and triumphs he has experienced as he navigates the cultural differences between his previous faith and his new one. Gary shares insights into the complexities of conversion, emphasizing that it is not merely a one-time event but an ongoing process that requires time and reflection. Throughout the episode, Gary discusses the significance of the temple in his faith journey, highlighting how his understanding evolved from initial confusion to a deeper appreciation for its role in connecting him to Jesus Christ. He stresses the importance of personal connections and clear messaging when discussing the temple, advocating for a focus on the principles of Jesus rather than the mystique often surrounding the temple experience. Gary also addresses the challenges of being perceived as a newcomer in the faith, noting the need for patience and understanding as individuals navigate their spiritual journeys at their own pace. 02:08 - Gary's Journey from Baptist Minister to Latter-day Saint 03:01 - Conversation Dynamics Between Friends 04:11 - Life Updates from Gary Miller 05:44 - The Complexity of Conversion Stories 06:34 - Cultural vs. Theological Conversion 09:14 - The Ongoing Nature of Conversion 10:27 - The Binary Nature of Faith Commitment 12:14 - The Importance of Personal Reflection in Faith 13:18 - Navigating the Journey of Faith 15:23 - The Cage Stage of New Believers 18:12 - The Need for Quiet Reflection 19:08 - Balancing Old and New Faith Communities 21:00 - Building a Foundation in Faith 22:33 - The Role of the Temple in Conversion 25:49 - Personal Connections and Understanding the Temple 29:06 - The Temple as a Place of Worship 30:40 - Messaging the Importance of the Temple 32:07 - The Need for Authentic and Simple Messaging 34:01 - Engaging with Old Friends about the Temple 36:29 - The Gravity of Worship in the Temple 37:34 - Current Calling and Church Involvement 38:32 - Gary's Podcasting Journey 41:08 - Balancing Scripture The award-winning Leading Saints Podcast is one of the top independent Latter-day Saints podcasts as part of nonprofit Leading Saints' mission to help Latter-day Saints be better prepared to lead. Learn more and listen to any of the past episodes for free at LeadingSaints.org. Past guests include Emily Belle Freeman, David Butler, Hank Smith, John Bytheway, Reyna and Elena Aburto, Liz Wiseman, Stephen M. R. Covey, Elder Alvin F. Meredith III, Julie Beck, Brad Wilcox, Jody Moore, Tony Overbay, John H. Groberg, Elaine Dalton, Tad R. Callister, Lynn G. Robbins, J. Devn Cornish, Bonnie Oscarson, Dennis B. Neuenschwander, Kirby Heyborne, Taysom Hill Anthony Sweat, John Hilton III, Barbara Morgan Gardner, Blair Hodges, Whitney Johnson, Ryan Gottfredson, Greg McKeown, Ganel-Lyn Condie, Michael Goodman, Wendy Ulrich, Richard Ostler,

Have you ever found yourself behaving in ways you never thought possible—slamming doors, raising your voice, or saying hurtful things—after months or years of emotional manipulation? In today's powerful episode of "Waking Up to Narcissism," we explore the crucial distinction between true abuse and what's often mislabeled as "reactive abuse." Through compelling real-life scenarios and expert analysis, you'll discover why these reactions don't make you "just as bad" and how pathologically kind people often find themselves paired with emotionally immature partners in breakup-resistant relationships. What if the shame you feel about your reactions is actually keeping you trapped in harmful dynamics? Join us as we unpack how to recognize the difference between healthy kindness and self-erasure, identify patterns of emotional immaturity, and reclaim your narrative from those who benefit from your self-doubt. This episode offers not just understanding, but a transformative path forward for anyone who's ever looked in the mirror and wondered, "Have I become the very thing I feared?" 00:00 Introduction and Current Events 00:14 Emotional Immaturity in Everyday Life 03:07 Defining Emotional Maturity 04:46 The Persistence of Emotional Immaturity 07:28 Breaking the Cycle of Emotional Immaturity 09:38 A Real-Life Scenario: Sarah and Mike 13:58 Understanding Reactive Response 26:25 Pathological Kindness vs. Emotional Immaturity 35:42 Understanding Emotionally Immature Behaviors 36:22 The Human Magnet Syndrome 37:21 Codependency and Reactive Responses 38:51 Examples of Reactive Responses 46:10 The Cycle Leading to Reactive Responses 54:24 Differentiation and Balance 58:56 Reframing Reactive Responses 01:03:38 Conclusion and Final Thoughts If you are interested in joining Tony's private Facebook group for women in narcissistic or emotionally immature relationships of any type, please reach out to him at contact@tonyoverbay.com or through the form on the website, HTTP://www.tonyoverbay.com If you are a man interested in joining Tony's "Emotional Architects" group to learn how to better navigate your relationship with a narcissistic or emotionally immature partner or learn how to become more emotionally mature yourself, please reach out to Tony at contact@tonyoverbay.com or through the form on the website, HTTP:www.tonyoverbay.com

Tony, a licensed marriage and family therapist, author, speaker, and podcast host, welcomes viewers to an engaging TikTok Live session. Joined by his daughter Mackie, Tony answers questions on various topics including relationships, mental health, and narcissism. They discuss the concept of the shadow self, the 'Let Them' theory, handling emotional triggers, and the importance of differentiation in relationships. Tony offers advice on dealing with controlling siblings, building clientele as a therapist, managing ADHD and its effects, and overcoming trust issues in relationships. They also touch on practical self-care tips and the journey of personal growth, using real-life examples and interactive discussions with their audience. 00:00 Welcome to TikTok Live 00:10 Introducing the Hosts 00:16 Engaging with Viewers 02:12 Discussing the Shadow Self 04:55 Exploring Family Dynamics 05:51 Romantic Relationships and Vulnerability 06:35 Understanding Emotional Reactions 08:07 Differentiation and Parental Influence 09:59 Setting Boundaries with Parents 10:47 The 'Let Them' Theory 15:20 Dealing with Emotional Regression 17:29 Navigating Breakups and Grief 20:43 Control and Mental Health 22:16 Book Recommendations for Couples 24:09 Making Small Changes for Big Impact 29:56 Managing Depression and Anxiety 31:43 Understanding and Accepting Anxiety 32:28 Facing Fears and Building Connections 33:43 Navigating Negative Environments 38:22 Inner Critic and Self-Acceptance 42:00 Challenges in Therapy and Relationships 01:01:59 Dealing with ADHD and Rejection Sensitivity 01:05:20 Conclusion and Final Thoughts

Rabbi Chaim Zippel was born and raised in nearby Salt Lake City, and is the first-Utah born Chabad Rabbi. He attended Yeshivas in California and New York, and has extensive experience in outreach work and youth programming all over the country. Rabbi Chaim & Esty Zippel moved to Lehi, Utah in 2022 to launch Chabad of Utah County. Chabad of Utah County is dedicated to promoting and strengthening Jewish awareness, pride, and observance, by providing educational, cultural, and social services to all Jewish individuals regardless of background, philosophy or level of commitment. The fundamental principle of Chabad is unconditional love and acceptance of every Jew. Links JewishUtahCounty.com Instagram: @jewishutahcounty Facebook: @jewishutahcounty Share your thoughts in the Leading Saints community. Transcript coming soon Get 14-day access to the Core Leader Library Highlights Rabbi Chaim Zippel, co-director of the Chabad of Utah County, shares about the unique experience of being Jewish in a predominantly Latter-day Saint community. He shares insights into the mission of Chabad, which aims to create a welcoming environment for Jewish individuals moving to Utah County, providing them with a space to gather, learn, and grow in their faith. The conversation delves into the differences between Jewish and Latter-day Saint practices, particularly regarding community engagement and religious observance. Rabbi Chaim explains that while prayer services may not attract large crowds, community events and educational opportunities are highly valued. He recounts his family's journey to Utah, highlighting the challenges and rewards of establishing a Jewish presence in the area. The discussion also touches on the complexities of Jewish dietary laws and the importance of understanding the rationale behind religious practices, emphasizing that some commandments are followed simply because they are divinely ordained. Rabbi Chaim reflects on the supportive nature of the Latter-day Saint community, noting that Utah County is one of the least anti-Semitic places he has experienced. He shares anecdotes about community support during challenging times, illustrating the strong interfaith relationships that have developed. 03:35 - Rabbi Chaim's Background and Role 04:07 - Overview of Chabad in Utah County 05:03 - Community Focus vs. Traditional Services 06:23 - Jewish Community Dynamics in Utah 07:27 - Rabbi Chaim's Journey to Utah 09:03 - Family Background and Chabad Movement 10:40 - The Need for Jewish Presence in Utah County 12:02 - Rabbi's Outreach to Jewish Youth 12:35 - Community Support and Anti-Semitism in Utah 21:05 - The Role of a Rabbi and Path to Leadership 23:02 - Conversion and Personal Journeys in Faith 30:03 - Understanding Jewish Laws and Practices 32:31 - Experiences and Testimonies in Faith 36:25 - Conversion Perspectives in Judaism 40:06 - Conclusion and Final Thoughts on Faith The award-winning Leading Saints Podcast is one of the top independent Latter-day Saints podcasts as part of nonprofit Leading Saints' mission to help Latter-day Saints be better prepared to lead. Learn more and listen to any of the past episodes for free at LeadingSaints.org. Past guests include Emily Belle Freeman, David Butler, Hank Smith, John Bytheway, Reyna and Elena Aburto, Liz Wiseman, Stephen M. R. Covey, Elder Alvin F. Meredith III, Julie Beck, Brad Wilcox, Jody Moore, Tony Overbay, John H. Groberg, Elaine Dalton, Tad R. Callister, Lynn G. Robbins, J. Devn Cornish, Bonnie Oscarson, Dennis B. Neuenschwander, Kirby Heyborne, Taysom Hill Anthony Sweat, John Hilton III, Barbara Morgan Gardner, Blair Hodges, Whitney Johnson, Ryan Gottfredson, Greg McKeown, Ganel-Lyn Condie, Michael Goodman, Wendy Ulrich, Richard Ostler, and many more in over 800 episodes. Discover podcasts, articles, virtual conferences, and live events related to callings such as the bishopric, Relief Society, elders quorum, Primary,

Jon Holdaway was born and raised in Pleasant Grove, Utah. He served in the Korea Seoul Mission, where he met Sister Juliette Landsem. They have two children. Jon graduated from Brigham Young University and BYU Law, and served in the Utah Army National Guard. He later became an Army JAG officer with assignments including Charlottesville, Virginia, Fort Sill, Oklahoma, and Darmstadt, Germany, where he also served in church leadership roles including bishopric member, high council member, and stake mission president. After leaving the Army, Jon moved to Los Angeles and practiced law while serving as bishop in the Venice/Marina del Rey area. He later returned to government service, working in the national security field for 12 years and serving in various church leadership roles, including high priest group leader and stake young men president. Jon and his wife moved to Korea in 2020, where he works as a senior civilian attorney and legal advisor to the United Nations Command, Combined Forces Command, and U.S. Forces Command. He currently serves as president of the Seoul Korea Military District. Links Share your thoughts in the Leading Saints community Transcript coming soon Get 14-day access to the Core Leader Library Highlights Jon shares shares insights from his unique leadership role within a transient community of military personnel and their families, highlighting the challenges of leading in a district where members frequently move, often serving in leadership positions for only a short time. He discusses the importance of revelation in leadership, emphasizing that leaders must be proactive in seeking divine guidance and making timely decisions. Jon shares personal anecdotes about his journey to Korea, his military background, and the diverse community he serves, which includes members from various countries and backgrounds. Throughout the conversation, Jon stresses the significance of ministering to individual leaders and ensuring their well-being, particularly in high-pressure environments. He explains how he fosters a culture of quick adaptation and responsiveness, encouraging leaders to "do something" rather than wait for perfect conditions. The episode also touches on the importance of having a clear mission statement and aligning efforts with the priorities set by church leadership, such as focusing on the rising generation, missionary work, and temple service. Jon's experiences illustrate the necessity of building momentum in leadership roles, even amidst constant change, and the value of creating a supportive environment where leaders can thrive. 05:04 - Jon Holdaway's Journey to Korea 06:03 - Military Background and Current Role 07:10 - Personal Connection to Korea 08:02 - Career Path and Revelatory Process 10:12 - Unique Calling as District President 11:00 - Reporting Structure in the Military District 12:36 - Coverage and Responsibilities of the District 13:43 - Diversity in the Military District 17:52 - Interaction with Korean Stakes 19:09 - Managing Transient Leadership 20:05 - Importance of Revelatory Leadership 25:16 - Coaching New Leaders on Revelation 30:20 - The Need for Quick Decision-Making 32:31 - Building Momentum in Leadership 35:35 - Aligning with Prophetic Priorities 37:10 - Customizing Efforts for Branch Needs 39:18 - Feedback and Improvement in Meetings 44:05 - The Importance of Quality Meetings The award-winning Leading Saints Podcast is one of the top independent Latter-day Saints podcasts as part of nonprofit Leading Saints' mission to help Latter-day Saints be better prepared to lead. Learn more and listen to any of the past episodes for free at LeadingSaints.org. Past guests include Emily Belle Freeman, David Butler, Hank Smith, John Bytheway, Reyna and Elena Aburto, Liz Wiseman, Stephen M. R. Covey, Elder Alvin F. Meredith III, Julie Beck, Brad Wilcox, Jody Moore, Tony Overbay, John H. Groberg, Elaine Dalton, Tad R. Callister, Lynn G. Robbins,

When Ashlee Boyson answered her door at age 28 to find detectives bearing unimaginable news—her husband murdered, an affair revealed—she became a widow with five children including a six-week-old baby. In this powerful episode of the Virtual Couch, Tony Overbay, LMFT, explores how this defining moment led Ashlee to become not just a survivor, but a guide for others navigating grief's complex terrain. Her groundbreaking book "One Day: A Child's Journey Through Grief and Loss," illustrated by her daughter Bostyn, takes a revolutionary approach by deliberately omitting facial expressions and colors—creating space for authentic emotions rather than prescribing how one "should" feel when grieving. Beyond the book, Tony and Ashlee dive into the messy truth of grief—how contradictory emotions can coexist, why well-intentioned comfort often invalidates emotional reality, and practical strategies for creating genuine healing. With moments of unexpected laughter amidst profound wisdom, they explore how Ashlee's journey led her to develop courses on infidelity and widowhood, practice foot zoning, and most importantly, help parents understand that there's no "right way" to grieve. Whether you're personally experiencing loss or supporting someone who is, this conversation offers a masterclass in compassionate presence and emotional intelligence that transcends age, making it essential listening for anyone seeking to process grief authentically. 00:00 Introduction and Announcements 01:35 Introducing Ashley Boyson 02:10 Ashley's Incredible Story 03:27 Ashley's Journey Through Grief 03:54 Discussing Ashley's New Book 12:04 The Healing Power of Foot Zoning 17:40 The Importance of Emotional Awareness 26:35 Addressing Children's Emotional Pain 27:06 Recognizing and Validating Emotions 27:45 Personal Experiences with Suppressed Emotions 28:52 Navigating Grief and Loss 30:33 Complex Emotions and Healing 31:30 The Importance of Open Communication 32:25 Balancing Past and Future Fears 34:11 Encouraging Emotional Expression in Children 35:51 Handling Grief Triggers 43:45 The Role of Truth in Healing 46:21 Final Thoughts and Resources

Frank Schwartz is a husband—for nearly 24 years—and a father of three girls. He was recently released from his elders quorum presidency and has served in several bishoprics, elders quorum presidencies, high councils, high priest group leaderships and Young Men presidencies (back when those were a thing), and a variety of other callings over the years. Frank did undergraduate and graduate work in Psychology and worked in television before starting a small, boutique, corporate communications firm. Most recently he has worked for a client in the healthcare payments space. Frank joined F3 in 2014 and has served in the national leadership in different capacities prior to taking over as Nant'an/CEO last year. Links F3 Nation Warrior Heart retreats Share your thoughts in the Leading Saints community Read the transcript of this podcast Get 14-day access to the Core Leader Library Highlights Frank shares his personal journey with F3, which began when he was encouraged by friends to join a workout group after facing health issues. He describes F3 as a community that not only promotes physical fitness but also fosters deep connections among men, encouraging them to support one another through challenges. The organization operates on five core principles: it is free, open to all men, conducted outdoors, peer-led, and concludes with a "circle of trust" where participants share personal struggles and support each other. Frank highlights the parallels between F3 and church leadership, particularly in how both rely on lay leadership and the importance of influence over authority. He discusses the decentralized nature of F3, where local groups operate independently while adhering to shared values, and emphasizes the transformative power of brotherhood and accountability in personal growth. Listen for insights on how church leaders, especially elders quorum presidents, can learn from and leverage F3 to enhance fellowship and support among men in their congregations, ultimately fostering a stronger sense of community and purpose. 04:03 - Frank Schwartz's Background 05:26 - What is F3? 07:33 - The Founding of F3 12:16 - Personal Journey to F3 16:35 - The Structure and Cadence of F3 Workouts 19:00 - Finding and Starting an F3 Group 21:30 - Leadership vs. Management in F3 25:07 - The Importance of Lay Leadership 30:14 - Starting Your Own F3 Group 36:23 - Inclusivity for All Fitness Levels 37:42 - Building Authentic Fellowship in F3 The award-winning Leading Saints Podcast is one of the top independent Latter-day Saints podcasts as part of nonprofit Leading Saints' mission to help Latter-day Saints be better prepared to lead. Learn more and listen to any of the past episodes for free at LeadingSaints.org. Past guests include Emily Belle Freeman, David Butler, Hank Smith, John Bytheway, Reyna and Elena Aburto, Liz Wiseman, Stephen M. R. Covey, Elder Alvin F. Meredith III, Julie Beck, Brad Wilcox, Jody Moore, Tony Overbay, John H. Groberg, Elaine Dalton, Tad R. Callister, Lynn G. Robbins, J. Devn Cornish, Bonnie Oscarson, Dennis B. Neuenschwander, Kirby Heyborne, Taysom Hill Anthony Sweat, John Hilton III, Barbara Morgan Gardner, Blair Hodges, Whitney Johnson, Ryan Gottfredson, Greg McKeown, Ganel-Lyn Condie, Michael Goodman, Wendy Ulrich, Richard Ostler, and many more in over 800 episodes. Discover podcasts, articles, virtual conferences, and live events related to callings such as the bishopric, Relief Society, elders quorum, Primary, youth leadership, stake leadership, ward mission, ward council, young adults, ministering, and teaching.

Courtney Bush lives in the Utah Area, married her high school sweetheart, and together they have two kids. She graduated from Brigham Young University in Early Childhood Education and has a deep love for teaching and helping children. During her time teaching, some of her accomplishments included the Golden Apple Award and KSL Teacher Feature. Courtney currently serves as stake Young Women president. She has previously served as a Young Women president, second counselor, secretary, & advisor, as a Primary counselor, and a Relief Society teacher. Courtney recently started an Instagram and TikTok specifically for young women, parents, and leaders, where she simply shares the doctrine of Jesus Christ. She enjoys teaching, speaking, and testifying of the Savior, especially within her own home. It's never boring at Courtney's house, where they have a miniature pony and a school bus, and their home is always stocked with lots of treats for the youth. She loves serving with her whole heart. Links Instagram: @ywfollowjesus Share your thoughts in the Leading Saints community Transcript coming soon Get 14-day access to the Core Leader Library Highlights Courtney emphasizes the need for leaders to inspire youth to take initiative and connect with their faith, ultimately preparing them for future challenges. She delves into her approach to empowering class presidencies, emphasizing the importance of youth-led initiatives and personal revelation, and shares practical strategies for helping young women develop leadership skills, such as counseling together and encouraging them to seek guidance from Heavenly Father. The conversation also touches on the significance of lesson instruction, where Courtney advocates for teaching doctrine in a relatable way, ensuring that young women feel confident in discussing and testifying about their faith. Courtney talks about "Treat Friday," a casual gathering she hosts for young women to connect, build relationships, and foster a sense of community. This not only serves as a fun social event but also acts as a bridge for young women to approach their bishop for guidance and support. Courtney also shares her experiences with Girls Camp, emphasizing the importance of creating opportunities for personal revelation and connection with Jesus Christ. 03:15 - Courtney's Passion for Young Womens Leadership 04:06 - Transition from Ward to Stake Young Womens President 06:09 - Demographics and Challenges in Lehigh, Utah 09:00 - Empowering Class Presidencies 12:06 - Coaching Youth to Seek Revelation 14:39 - Training Adult Leaders in the Stake 16:37 - Workshops for Young Womens Advisors 19:22 - Collaborating with Stake Presidency 21:37 - Treat Friday: A Casual Gathering 24:08 - The Impact of Treat Friday 27:00 - Creating a Safe Space for Youth 29:10 - Principles of Effective Lesson Instruction 31:59 - Enhancing Doctrinal Understanding 34:53 - Best Practices for Girls Camp 36:55 - The Party Bus Experience 40:18 - The Importance of Community and Connection 41:39 - Creating Positive Online Content The award-winning Leading Saints Podcast is one of the top independent Latter-day Saints podcasts as part of nonprofit Leading Saints' mission to help Latter-day Saints be better prepared to lead. Learn more and listen to any of the past episodes for free at LeadingSaints.org. Past guests include Emily Belle Freeman, David Butler, Hank Smith, John Bytheway, Reyna and Elena Aburto, Liz Wiseman, Stephen M. R. Covey, Elder Alvin F. Meredith III, Julie Beck, Brad Wilcox, Jody Moore, Tony Overbay, John H. Groberg, Elaine Dalton, Tad R. Callister, Lynn G. Robbins, J. Devn Cornish, Bonnie Oscarson, Dennis B. Neuenschwander, Kirby Heyborne, Taysom Hill Anthony Sweat, John Hilton III, Barbara Morgan Gardner, Blair Hodges, Whitney Johnson, Ryan Gottfredson, Greg McKeown, Ganel-Lyn Condie, Michael Goodman, Wendy Ulrich, Richard Ostler, and many more in over 800 episodes. Discover podcasts,

In this episode of The Virtual Couch Presents: Waking Up to Narcissism, host Tony Overbay explores the transformative journey of healing from relationships with emotionally immature or narcissistic partners. With the popularity of the 'Death by a Thousand Cuts' series, Tony introduces a new perspective—'Growth by a Thousand Stitches.' The episode features real stories from listeners who have found strength and self-worth through small, impactful victories. Tony delves into various categories such as reclaiming simple joys, embracing self-care, setting healthy boundaries, and rediscovering personal identity. This episode is filled with hope, tangible steps towards healing, and inspiring testimonials that underscore the power of self-love and personal growth. Subscribe, share, and join Tony and his community on this journey of healing and transformation. 00:00 Introduction and Welcome 01:21 The Impact of 'Death by a Thousand Cuts' 05:08 Understanding Switzerland Friends 09:15 The Healing Journey Begins 14:51 Reclaiming Simple Joys 16:57 Physical and Emotional Self-Care 18:52 Creating Safe Spaces 20:44 Building New Relationships 21:55 The Power of Boundaries 23:31 Rediscovering Identity 24:19 Finding Joy in Forbidden Activities 26:12 Embracing Imperfection 27:14 Processing Emotions 28:57 Creating New Traditions 29:30 Building Self-Trust 32:32 Learning to Take Up Space 33:26 Embracing Spiritual and Personal Growth 33:55 Finding Strength in Community 35:27 Creating New Measures of Success 36:17 Embracing Self-Care Without Guilt 38:57 Setting Healthy Boundaries 40:01 Finding Joy in the Present 40:27 Conclusion: The Journey of Healing If you are interested in joining Tony's private Facebook group for women in narcissistic or emotionally immature relationships of any type, please reach out to him at contact@tonyoverbay.com or through the form on the website, HTTP://www.tonyoverbay.com If you are a man interested in joining Tony's "Emotional Architects" group to learn how to better navigate your relationship with a narcissistic or emotionally immature partner or learn how to become more emotionally mature yourself, please reach out to Tony at contact@tonyoverbay.com or through the form on the website, HTTP:www.tonyoverbay.com

What happens when two first responders fall in love, face career, life, and faith crises, and embark on a radical journey of healing? How do couples navigate from survival mode to genuine connection after years of chaos and trauma? Tony welcomes Steph and Craig Salazar, the authentic couple behind the popular podcast "The Steph and Craig Show." What begins as a reunion of newfound friends quickly transforms into a profound exploration of relationship transformation, personal growth, and the messy beauty of healing together. Steph and Craig share their remarkable journey from meeting as a police officer and dispatcher to becoming relationship content creators who are changing lives through radical vulnerability. They don't hold back as they discuss the chaos of their early relationship—blending families, career crises, mental health struggles, and the imbalanced dynamics that nearly tore them apart. Listen as they reveal the pivotal moments that shifted their path: Craig's life-changing men's retreat that Steph secretly feared might end their relationship, Steph's breaking point in her dispatch career and her courageous pivot to follow her dreams, and how they both found healing through therapy, spiritual practices, and even psychedelic-assisted healing experiences. This conversation isn't about relationship experts who have it all figured out. It's about two people who've "taken the scenic route" through life's challenges, hitting every obstacle along the way, and discovering that true connection happens when we heal individually first. Whether you're facing relationship challenges, navigating career transitions, or doing your own healing work, this episode offers profound insights wrapped in genuine, heartfelt conversation. Steph and Craig's mission to create a mirror where others might see themselves and feel less alone in their struggles shines through every moment of this unforgettable discussion. Join Tony, Steph, and Craig for a conversation that proves we're all healing together—one vulnerable step at a time. The Steph and Craig Show is available at https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-steph-craig-show/id1742462702 or wherever you listen to podcasts, as well as on YouTube. You can find the episode that Tony references on their show at https://youtu.be/n_LiTO_nt5w?si=GAmnZF3rFdh7QPFH 00:00 Introduction and Welcome 01:07 Special Guests: Steph and Craig 01:49 The Transformative Podcast Episode 02:22 Authenticity and Vulnerability 03:35 The Journey of Steph and Craig 04:03 Career Transitions and Challenges 04:39 The Scenic Route to Healing 07:30 Magic and Connection 10:04 Meeting and Early Relationship 12:02 Navigating Careers and Personal Growth 22:28 Curiosity About Life Changes 23:32 Spiritual Awakening and Energy Healing 24:28 Journey with DreamPod and Financial Stability 25:44 Stephanie's Career Shift and Personal Growth 28:49 Balancing Masculine and Feminine Energies 33:19 Men's Retreat and Emotional Connection 44:12 Therapy and Healing Together 48:45 Current Focus and Future Plans **Show Notes:** - How Steph and Craig met in law enforcement and blended their families - The career crisis that sent Craig into depression and changed their trajectory - Why Steph thought sending Craig to a men's retreat might mean the end of their relationship - Their journey through energy healing, spiritual awakening, and finding authentic connection - How individual healing created the foundation for relationship transformation - The role of therapy, MDMA-assisted healing, and psychedelics in their growth - Their transition from couples coaching to content creation focused on vulnerability - Tony's reflections on masculine/feminine energy and the burdens in relationships **Keywords:** relationship transformation, healing, vulnerability, law enforcement trauma, men's work, couples therapy, psychedelic healing, content creation, authentic connection

Every couple starts their marriage journey with hearts full of hope and eyes bright with optimism. But what happens when the fairy tale meets reality? In this compelling episode of the Virtual Couch, marriage therapist Tony Overbay takes listeners on an intimate journey through the evolution of marriage, sparked by his observation of a young newlywed couple, Hannah and Cody, during a recent podcast interview. Drawing from over 20 years of experience as a marriage therapist, Tony bridges the gap between those magical early days and the complex reality that many couples face years into their marriage. He addresses the common refrain of "just wait until..." that many newlyweds hear, while offering hope and practical tools for couples at all stages of their relationship. Key insights include: - The power of intentional curiosity in long-term relationships - Why emotional maturity matters more than initial chemistry - The critical balance between self-care and partner care - How to maintain individual growth while nurturing your relationship - The four pillars of connected conversation that can transform your communication Tony shares vulnerable moments from his own 34-year marriage journey, demonstrating how the principles he teaches aren't just theoretical—they're battle-tested. He tackles the delicate balance between maintaining individual identity and building a strong partnership, offering practical insights for both newlyweds and seasoned couples. Whether you're basking in newlywed bliss like Hannah and Cody or navigating the complexities of a decades-long partnership, this episode provides a roadmap for understanding how to evolve together while maintaining the spark that brought you together in the first place. Tony's unique perspective helps couples understand that while change is inevitable in marriage, it doesn't have to mean growing apart—it can mean growing together in new and deeper ways. This episode is essential listening for: - Newlywed couples wanting to build a strong foundation - Long-term couples seeking to reconnect or deepen their bond - Anyone curious about the real journey from romantic love to lasting partnership - Couples wanting practical tools for better communication and understanding Join Tony as he unpacks these insights and more, offering both hope and practical strategies for couples at any stage of their marriage journey. Follow the Q&A Files Podcast on Spotify https://open.spotify.com/show/1k2Oh4rY9VCp1tVeu14dxk?si=a39537613900475b Apple Podcasts https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-q-a-files/id1730736061 or wherever you listen to podcasts. 00:00 Introduction and Podcast Overview 01:52 Reflecting on Marriage and Personal Experiences 03:42 The Importance of Communication in Relationships 05:42 Premarital and Newlywed Counseling Insights 06:59 Four Pillars of a Connected Conversation 11:15 Navigating Discomfort and Growth in Relationships 19:52 Intentionality and Integrity in Commitments 23:22 Embracing Change and Curiosity in Marriage 25:49 Expressing Authenticity 26:00 Navigating Online Dating 28:01 The Game of Emotional Immaturity 28:44 The Challenge of Authenticity in Dating 30:07 Saying 'I Love You' 32:38 Psychological Flexibility in Relationships 39:06 The Importance of Self-Care 42:56 Boundaries and Pathological Kindness 45:07 Choosing Love Daily 46:53 Conclusion and Future Topics

Matt Bardsley grew up in Montana, and after a mission to New Jersey moved to Utah to go to school and has been there ever since. He has a bachelor's degree from Brigham Young University in Sociology and a master's degree from Utah State University in Education. He has been a seminary teacher for 19 years, 12 of those serving as a local faculty principal where he gets to train teachers. He is a former Young Men president, elders quorum president, ward mission leader, bishopric member, high councilor, and stake Young Men president, and currently serves as first counselor in his stake Young Men presidency. Kim Perkins is a coach with Accepted, passionate about guiding individuals on their journey to healing and fostering deep connections, and empowering them to unlock their true potential and lead fulfilling lives. Kim enjoys the great outdoors, hiking, volleyball, and embarking on exciting travel adventures with her husband and four children. She currently serves in her stake Young Women presidency. Links Accepted Share your thoughts in the Leading Saints community Transcript coming soon Get 14-day access to the Core Leader Library Training Materials 3 Targets - Activity Planning PDF 3-Month Planning Meetings PDF Connect it to Christ PDF Counseling Together PDF Delegation PDF Making Announcements - Hype Squad PDF Pair and Share PDF Presidency Meetings - Teeter Totter PDF Sandbox PDF Highlights This dynamic discussion with Kim and Matt centers around the importance of mentorship and effective training for youth leaders. They share their experiences and insights on how to transform traditional youth leadership approaches into more impactful mentorship roles, and emphasize the significance of understanding one's purpose, identifying youth life goals, and fostering transformational relationships rather than merely filling time during weekly activities. Kim and Matt explain their approach to training, which includes quarterly sessions for all youth leaders and more targeted workshops for specific wards. They focus on practical skills such as effective communication, delegation, and connecting youth activities to the teachings of Jesus Christ. By observing and providing feedback in real time, they help leaders recognize their strengths and areas for improvement. 05:31 - Kim's Experience in Youth Leadership 06:26 - Matt's Background in Teaching Youth 07:37 - Observations on Youth Programs 08:35 - The Importance of Training in Leadership 09:56 - Origin of Formal Training Approaches 11:04 - Developing Effective Training Skills 12:09 - Interactive and Experiential Training Methods 13:48 - Training Audience and Frequency 15:03 - Observing and Supporting Ward Leaders 16:04 - Building Relationships with Leaders 17:05 - Feedback and Reflection After Observations 20:07 - Common Issues in Youth Leadership 22:53 - The Importance of Delegation Skills 24:55 - Coaching Others in Leadership Skills 27:27 - Connecting Activities to the Savior 29:25 - Practicing Skills in Training Sessions 32:02 - Engaging Youth in Leadership Training 35:10 - Summary of Effective Training Practices The award-winning Leading Saints Podcast is one of the top independent Latter-day Saints podcasts as part of nonprofit Leading Saints' mission to help Latter-day Saints be better prepared to lead. Learn more and listen to any of the past episodes for free at LeadingSaints.org. Past guests include Emily Belle Freeman, David Butler, Hank Smith, John Bytheway, Reyna and Elena Aburto, Liz Wiseman, Stephen M. R. Covey, Elder Alvin F. Meredith III, Julie Beck, Brad Wilcox, Jody Moore, Tony Overbay, John H. Groberg, Elaine Dalton, Tad R. Callister, Lynn G. Robbins, J. Devn Cornish, Bonnie Oscarson, Dennis B. Neuenschwander, Kirby Heyborne, Taysom Hill Anthony Sweat, John Hilton III, Barbara Morgan Gardner, Blair Hodges, Whitney Johnson, Ryan Gottfredson, Greg McKeown, Ganel-Lyn Condie, Michael Goodman, Wendy Ulrich,

What happens when you walk face-first into a wall at the movies? For therapist Tony Overbay, it led to a deep discussion about relationships, self-worth, and the challenges of being true to yourself in a world that often demands conformity. In this engaging episode of The Virtual Couch, Tony is joined by his daughter Mackie for their regular Sunday night Q&A session. After sharing a humorous story about his movie theater mishap (complete with butterfly stitches), they dive into profound conversations about relationships, mental health, and personal growth. The episode explores the concept of "normal" versus "pathological" narcissism, with Tony breaking down Eleanor Greenberg's research on how healthy ego differs from defensive narcissism. They discuss how true confidence comes from actual accomplishments rather than a fragile facade of superiority. A significant portion focuses on the challenges of maintaining authenticity in relationships, particularly when dealing with emotional immaturity. Tony explains how many people lose themselves trying to make others happy, and the importance of choosing self-care first - not as an act of selfishness, but as a necessary foundation for genuine connection. The father-daughter duo tackles numerous listener questions, covering topics like: - Setting healthy boundaries versus giving ultimatums - The impact of being a "scapegoat" in family dynamics - Dealing with betrayal trauma and infidelity - The struggles of highly sensitive people (HSP) - Navigating relationships with emotionally immature partners - The challenges of being authentically yourself in a society that often rewards conformity Throughout the episode, Tony emphasizes the importance of differentiation - developing a strong but flexible sense of self while maintaining connections with others. He provides practical advice for listeners struggling with various relationship challenges, including resources for finding affordable therapy and support groups for those dealing with emotionally immature partners. The conversation weaves together clinical insights with personal experiences, creating an authentic and relatable dialogue that helps listeners understand they're not alone in their struggles. Tony and Mackie's natural rapport adds warmth and accessibility to complex therapeutic concepts, making them more digestible for a general audience. 00:00 Introduction and Setting the Scene 01:06 Super Bowl and Halftime Show Reactions 02:30 Movie Theater Mishap and Story Time 07:10 Relationship Dynamics and Self-Care 11:47 Understanding Narcissism and Healthy Ego 17:34 Questions from the Audience 41:14 Navigating the Online Dating World 41:50 The Struggle of Authenticity in Relationships 43:20 The Journey of Emotional Growth 47:22 Dealing with Narcissistic Relationships 53:54 The Importance of Setting Boundaries 01:11:12 Overcoming Trauma and Seeking Therapy 01:14:15 Confronting Relationship Challenges 01:19:59 Final Thoughts and Resources

Parker Walbeck shares his journey as a millennial content creator who aims to engage both younger and older audiences with gospel messages through short, impactful videos. He emphasizes the significance of sharing simple, foundational doctrines and the power of personal testimony, noting that even small acts of sharing can have a profound impact on friends and family. Parker is a filmmaker, social media expert, and creator of the "True Millennial" YouTube channel, where he shares his insights on using social media to share the gospel. He has worked with the Church to help improve their online presence, and speaks frequently at local church events, where he teaches others how to use these tools effectively. Links YouTube: @TrueMillennial Instagram: @true.millennials Share your thoughts in the Leading Saints community Transcript coming soon Get 14-day access to the Core Leader Library Highlights Parker recounts his experience working with Elder Neil L. Andersen of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles during a trip to the Philippines, where he documented the apostle's ministry and interactions with local members. He describes Elder Anderson's genuine care for individuals, his commitment to knowing names, and his reliance on the teachings of the living prophet. The episode also touches on the importance of humility and the simplicity of the gospel, as Parker reflects on how the apostles focus on basic doctrines rather than complex theological concepts. Additionally, Kurt and Parker discuss the potential for local church members to create content that shares their faith stories, suggesting that even small-scale initiatives, like ward podcasts, can foster community and strengthen testimonies. The episode concludes with a call to action for listeners to utilize their unique talents in service of the church, reinforcing the idea that everyone has a role to play in sharing the gospel. 04:07 - Overview of True Millennial Podcast 06:01 - Parker's Journey into Content Creation 10:02 - The Concept of True Millennials 11:41 - Sharing the Gospel on Social Media 17:10 - The Importance of Influence in Small Audiences 19:02 - Parker's Experience with Elder Anderson 25:26 - Insights from Traveling with an Apostle 29:18 - The Simplicity of Gospel Teachings 36:00 - Interviewing Elder Bednar 38:11 - Local Church Content Creation Ideas 41:00 - Engaging Stake Communication Strategies The award-winning Leading Saints Podcast is one of the top independent Latter-day Saints podcasts as part of nonprofit Leading Saints' mission to help Latter-day Saints be better prepared to lead. Learn more and listen to any of the past episodes for free at LeadingSaints.org. Past guests include Emily Belle Freeman, David Butler, Hank Smith, John Bytheway, Reyna and Elena Aburto, Liz Wiseman, Stephen M. R. Covey, Elder Alvin F. Meredith III, Julie Beck, Brad Wilcox, Jody Moore, Tony Overbay, John H. Groberg, Elaine Dalton, Tad R. Callister, Lynn G. Robbins, J. Devn Cornish, Bonnie Oscarson, Dennis B. Neuenschwander, Kirby Heyborne, Taysom Hill Anthony Sweat, John Hilton III, Barbara Morgan Gardner, Blair Hodges, Whitney Johnson, Ryan Gottfredson, Greg McKeown, Ganel-Lyn Condie, Michael Goodman, Wendy Ulrich, Richard Ostler, and many more in over 800 episodes. Discover podcasts, articles, virtual conferences, and live events related to callings such as the bishopric, Relief Society, elders quorum, Primary, youth leadership, stake leadership, ward mission, ward council, young adults, ministering, and teaching.

Tony welcomes sisters Sarah Bailey and Karla Cragg, who share a passion for enhancing the social lives of individuals with autism. They introduce their Breaking Social Barriers PEERS program, an evidence-based social skills training course designed specifically for young adults on the autism spectrum. Their program is based on UCLA's acclaimed PEERS treatment model, the only research-backed method proven to help young adults with autism form and maintain meaningful friendships. Sarah and Karla provide an inside look at their curriculum, which offers practical strategies for entering, maintaining, and exiting conversations—along with other essential social skills that set individuals up for success. They emphasize the importance of honoring autistic individuals' authenticity while equipping them with the social tools they may need. The conversation also explores key topics such as the differences between autism and highly sensitive person (HSP) traits, the impact of diagnosis and labeling, and the increasing demand for targeted social skills training. Tune in to discover how Sarah and Karla's approach is making a profound difference in the lives of autistic individuals—whether formally diagnosed or self-identified. Learn more about their evidence-based programs at BreakingSocialBarriers.com. 00:00 Welcome to the Virtual Couch 01:11 Diving into Autism Awareness 02:22 Carla's Journey into Autism Education 05:31 Introducing the Peers Program 08:27 Navigating Social Skills for Young Adults 12:44 Understanding Autism and Neurodiversity 20:43 Navigating Social Interactions with High Functioning Autism 21:27 Teaching the Art of Trading Information 23:30 The Importance of Evidence-Based Social Skills Programs 25:18 Addressing Loneliness and Social Isolation 26:24 Course Structure and Content 29:43 Role Playing and Practical Applications 35:56 Enhancing Authentic Social Interactions 38:29 Conclusion and Contact Information

Tanner Pursley was born and raised in Thatcher, Arizona. He served his mission in Recife, Brasil, and graduated from BYU-Idaho where he married his sweetheart Nicole. He got his Masters Degree in School Counseling from Northern Arizona University. Tanner has over six years of EFY experience and another five working as a wrangler for troubled teenagers at Arivaca Boys Ranch. He currently is serving as the bishop in his ward in Morenci, Arizona, where he developed a youth program called "I Can Do Hard Things" to help drive kids off the couch and into living life and preparing for the temple/mission. Tanner's passions include rock climbing, scuba diving, playing Jenga with kids, losing to his bros in fantasy football, and cuddling his little daughter Cedar. Links I Can Do Hard Things Challenge (Packet) I Can Do Hard Things Challenge (Printable Booklet) Contact: Facebook, Instagram: @tanmanpursley73, or contact us and we'll forward your message Share your thoughts in the Leading Saints community Transcript coming soon Get 14-day access to the Core Leader Library Highlights Tanner shares insights from his recent initiative called the "I Can Do Hard Things Challenge." This program, developed while he served as a counselor in the bishopric, aims to provide youth with structured goals across the four quadrants in the Children and Youth program: spiritual, social, intellectual, and physical. Tanner explains how he drew inspiration from scouting and other youth programs to create a comprehensive list of activities that encourage youth to step outside their comfort zones and engage in meaningful experiences. Throughout the conversation, Tanner discusses the importance of parental buy-in and how the challenge has positively impacted the culture of his small ward, which previously struggled with youth engagement and missionary work. He highlights the success of the program, noting that it has led to increased participation among the youth and has even inspired similar initiatives in other organizations within the ward. The episode emphasizes the significance of celebrating achievements, as Tanner describes the award ceremony where participants receive recognition for their hard work, fostering a sense of community and accomplishment. Leadership is about empowering others to reach their potential, and Tanner's approach serves as a practical example for other leaders looking to inspire and uplift the youth in their wards. 05:48 - Tanner's Background and New Calling 06:59 - The "I Can Do Hard Things" Challenge 09:47 - Overview of the Youth Program and Goals 10:44 - Changing the Culture in the Ward 12:01 - Structure of the Challenge 20:49 - Breakdown of the Challenge Areas 25:07 - Physical Challenge Activities 27:51 - Social Challenge Activities 29:38 - Spiritual Challenge Activities 30:49 - Intellectual Challenge Activities 32:04 - Importance of Accountability 33:01 - Reward Ceremony and Recognition 34:27 - Encouraging Participation and Buy-In The award-winning Leading Saints Podcast is one of the top independent Latter-day Saints podcasts as part of nonprofit Leading Saints' mission to help Latter-day Saints be better prepared to lead. Learn more and listen to any of the past episodes for free at LeadingSaints.org. Past guests include Emily Belle Freeman, David Butler, Hank Smith, John Bytheway, Reyna and Elena Aburto, Liz Wiseman, Stephen M. R. Covey, Elder Alvin F. Meredith III, Julie Beck, Brad Wilcox, Jody Moore, Tony Overbay, John H. Groberg, Elaine Dalton, Tad R. Callister, Lynn G. Robbins, J. Devn Cornish, Bonnie Oscarson, Dennis B. Neuenschwander, Kirby Heyborne, Taysom Hill Anthony Sweat, John Hilton III, Barbara Morgan Gardner, Blair Hodges, Whitney Johnson, Ryan Gottfredson, Greg McKeown, Ganel-Lyn Condie, Michael Goodman, Wendy Ulrich, Richard Ostler, and many more in over 800 episodes. Discover podcasts, articles, virtual conferences, and live events related to callings such as the bisho...

Have you ever been told you're 'too sensitive' or that you need to ‘get over it,' or ‘don't worry about it,' but that only causes you to worry more, or feel less connected to others, or even yourself? Or have you been told that your sensitivity must mean you're on the autism spectrum? Or are you on the autisim spectrum and can you also identify with many of the characteristics of Highly Sensitive People? With over 2.2 million views and hundreds of comments on recent viral videos about Highly Sensitive People (HSPs), it's clear this topic strikes a nerve. Drawing from his experience working with both HSPs and individuals with ASD, Tony dives deep into why these distinct experiences are often confused - and why understanding the difference isn't just interesting, it's essential for creating a more empathetic world. Through viral video statistics, personal anecdotes, and real-world examples, he breaks down how HSPs (representing 15-20% of the population) and individuals with ASD navigate life differently. From sensory processing to social dynamics, discover why that deep emotional processing might actually be an evolutionary advantage rather than a disorder. Along the way, the discussion explores how ADHD and NPD (Narcissistic Personality Disorder) intersect with these experiences. This episode provides crucial insights into recognizing, understanding, and supporting both HSPs and individuals with ASD. Whether questioning your own experiences or trying to better understand someone else's, listeners will find the clarity and validation they've been seeking. Perfect for anyone who's ever felt misunderstood about their sensitivity or confused about where they fit in the neurodiversity spectrum. Join Tony for an eye-opening discussion that might just change how you see yourself - or someone you love." 00:00 Welcome and Introduction 00:30 The Viral Video on Highly Sensitive People 01:04 Behind the Scenes: Social Media Stats 02:05 Addressing Misconceptions and Personal Insights 03:26 A Personal Anecdote: The Butterfly Bandage 04:12 Responding to Drive-By Comments 04:29 Understanding Highly Sensitive People (HSP) vs Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) 07:27 Story Time: Sarah and Michael's Interaction 18:57 The Evolutionary Purpose of High Sensitivity 21:39 Traits and Characteristics of Highly Sensitive People 29:17 Challenges Faced by Highly Sensitive People 33:59 The Importance of Curiosity and Understanding 35:30 Understanding Human Uniqueness 36:22 Fascinating Facts About Human Preferences 37:22 The Complexity of Sensitivity 39:20 Exploring Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) 40:49 Comparing HSP and ASD Sensory Experiences 54:50 Social Interactions: HSP vs. ASD 01:00:47 Nonverbal Communication Differences 01:04:26 Emotional Energy and Social Fatigue 01:08:05 Final Thoughts and Listener Engagement

Have you ever tried selling a grand piano on Facebook Marketplace? Our latest episode of the Q&A Files kicks off with some personal tales of downsizing and the hilarious adventures that come with it. Join us as Trisha Jamison, a board-certified functional nutritionist, and Tony Overbay, a licensed marriage and family therapist and seasoned podcaster from The Virtual Couch, and Waking Up To Narcissism, discuss these issues for Tony's podcast, The Virtual Couch. Trisha and Tony discuss emotional immaturity and narcissistic traits and offer a path to healthier relationships. We share our own journeys of growth and healing to show how. This episode delves into the challenges of navigating emotionally complex relationships and the power of validation. Whether dealing with resistance from a partner or unlocking the transformative potential of self-awareness, our candid discussions aim to provide fresh perspectives and practical strategies for listeners who might be walking similar paths. Join us next time as we discuss how to keep your relationships fresh by talking to a newlywed couple who are just as cute as can be! Follow the Q&A Files Podcast on Spotify https://open.spotify.com/show/1k2Oh4rY9VCp1tVeu14dxk?si=a39537613900475b Apple Podcasts https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-q-a-files/id1730736061 or wherever you listen to podcasts.

Jodi Atkinson was born and raised in Utah, and has lived all over the state. She went to college at Utah Tech University in St. George, Utah, and graduated with an Associates Degree in Science. That was where she met and married her husband, Brian. She then took on her next greatest educational experience as the mother of five children. The family left Utah in 2011 and has since lived in Texas, Illinois, and in the Kansas City, Missouri area for the past seven years. Another adventure awaits, and they will be moving back to St. George this summer. Jodi is excited to go back to college and pursue a degree in Art. She has had many service opportunities within the Church that have enriched her life: Young Women president and advisor, youth Sunday School teacher, Young Women camp director, Primary counselor, Seminary teacher, and stake Young Women president. Jodi currently serves as an enthusiastic Primary teacher. Links Share your thoughts in the Leading Saints community Transcript coming soon Get 14-day access to the Core Leader Library Highlights Jodi emphasizes that youth should not be viewed as problems to be solved but as solutions, advocating for a collaborative approach where youth are actively involved in decision-making through councils. She reflects on her experience, highlighting the need for innovative thinking and adaptability in youth programs and stressing that relationships matter significantly in fostering a supportive environment. Jodi shares specific examples of how she engaged with youth, such as incorporating their ideas into activities like Young Womens camp and a trek, ensuring they felt heard and valued. Jodi also discusses the importance of ministering and being present in the lives of youth and leaders, which helped build trust and community within the stake, and shares the powerful principle that the Lord does not ask us to serve to deplete us or prove ourselves but to grow and strengthen our connections with Him and others. 05:04 - Jodi's Experience as Stake Young Womens President 05:45 - Unique Demographics of the Shawnee Stake 06:51 - Starting the Calling During COVID 10:40 - Embracing a Clean Slate Mentality 12:27 - The Importance of Youth Councils 16:16 - Letting Youth Lead in Activities 19:43 - Specific Examples of Youth Engagement 22:10 - Trek Experience and Youth Involvement 26:06 - Building Relationships with Youth Leaders 30:01 - Habits for Fostering Relationships 34:52 - The Lord's Purpose in Service 35:10 - Object Lesson on Leadership and Service The award-winning Leading Saints Podcast is one of the top independent Latter-day Saints podcasts as part of nonprofit Leading Saints' mission to help Latter-day Saints be better prepared to lead. Learn more and listen to any of the past episodes for free at LeadingSaints.org. Past guests include Emily Belle Freeman, David Butler, Hank Smith, John Bytheway, Reyna and Elena Aburto, Liz Wiseman, Stephen M. R. Covey, Elder Alvin F. Meredith III, Julie Beck, Brad Wilcox, Jody Moore, Tony Overbay, John H. Groberg, Elaine Dalton, Tad R. Callister, Lynn G. Robbins, J. Devn Cornish, Bonnie Oscarson, Dennis B. Neuenschwander, Kirby Heyborne, Taysom Hill Anthony Sweat, John Hilton III, Barbara Morgan Gardner, Blair Hodges, Whitney Johnson, Ryan Gottfredson, Greg McKeown, Ganel-Lyn Condie, Michael Goodman, Wendy Ulrich, Richard Ostler, and many more in over 800 episodes. Discover podcasts, articles, virtual conferences, and live events related to callings such as the bishopric, Relief Society, elders quorum, Primary, youth leadership, stake leadership, ward mission, ward council, young adults, ministering, and teaching.

Tony Overbay is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist who followed his gut and heart into the world of ACT (Acceptance and Commitment Therapy) to provide tools and strategies to thousands of couples and individuals. You can find his courses, podcast & therapy offerings HERE Ashlynn, former cohost of the top 10 podcast "The Betrayed, The Addicted & The Expert," now host of "This Is Ashlynn," shares her journey and helps others find their path to healing. After navigating a public divorce that ended a 21-year marriage and impacted her business, she transformed her personal challenges into a mission to empower women. Through online groups and in-person retreats, she guides women in reclaiming their intuition, self-love, and personal power after experiencing self & relationship betrayal or divorce. As a mother of two teenage daughters and someone who has successfully rebuilt both her life and business, Ashlynn brings authentic experience to her work. She understands firsthand the journey of rediscovering self-trust and embracing one's full potential after years of dimming her light for others' acceptance. When she's not empowering women, you can find her hiking trails, roller skating, or dancing – activities that embody the joy and freedom she helps others rediscover. Find her at www.thisisashlynn.com IG: @this.isAshlynn 

Have you ever tried selling a grand piano on Facebook Marketplace? Our latest episode of the Q&A Files kicks off with some personal tales of downsizing and the hilarious adventures that come with it. Join us as Trisha Jamison, a board-certified functional nutritionist, and Tony Overbay, a licensed marriage and family therapist and seasoned podcaster from The Virtual Couch, and Waking Up To Narcissism, discuss these issues for Tony's podcast, The Virtual Couch. Trisha and Tony discuss emotional immaturity and narcissistic traits and offer a path to healthier relationships. We share our own journeys of growth and healing to show how. This episode delves into the challenges of navigating emotionally complex relationships and the power of validation. Whether dealing with resistance from a partner or unlocking the transformative potential of self-awareness, our candid discussions aim to provide fresh perspectives and practical strategies for listeners who might be walking similar paths. Join us next time as we discuss how to keep your relationships fresh by talking to a newlywed couple who are just as cute as can be! Follow the Q&A Files Podcast on Spotify https://open.spotify.com/show/1k2Oh4rY9VCp1tVeu14dxk?si=a39537613900475b Apple Podcasts https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-q-a-files/id1730736061 or wherever you listen to podcasts.

Skyler Sorensen grew up in St. George, Utah as the fourth of eight children. He is an active Latter-day Saint who experiences same-sex attraction. He and his wife, Amanda, were married in the Provo, Utah temple in 2018. He graduated from Brigham Young University with a bachelor's in Media Arts and currently works with the team at Scripture Central. Skyler started the podcast “Sit Down with Sky”, which has recently morphed into a YouTube series. The series is dedicated to finding and maintaining eternal truths in the conversation around LGBTQ issues. Skyler is also the author of Exclude Not Thyself: Thriving as a Covenant-Keeping, Gay Latter-day Saint, aimed at providing a faith-affirming approach to LGBTQ issues. Skyler and Amanda have three children. Their first son, Milo, was born at 24½ weeks, and after a few weeks of battling for his life in newborn intensive care, he passed away in Amanda's arms. They have two living daughters, Remi and Lainey, both under the age of three. Skyler's current church calling is Gospel Doctrine teacher. Links Exclude Not Thyself: Thriving as a Covenant-Keeping Gay Latter-Day Saint Sit Down with Sky Connect with Skyler Scripture Central North Star Share your thoughts in the Leading Saints community Transcript coming soon Get 14-day access to the Core Leader Library Highlights Skyler shares his personal journey as a gay Latter-day Saint, detailing his experiences with same-sex attraction, his decision to marry a woman in the temple, and the fulfillment he finds in his family life. Skyler shares his perspective on the labels of identity, expressing a desire to prioritize his core identity as a disciple of Jesus Christ over societal labels. Kurt and Skyler talk about the tension church leaders face when discussing doctrines related to the eternal family, emphasizing the need for compassion while upholding the ideal of eternal marriage. Skyler highlights the importance of understanding doctrine in a way that fosters genuine relationships, even amidst disagreements about lifestyle choices. The discussion also touches on the significance of therapy and the value of seeking resources that align with one's faith. Both Kurt and Skyler stress the importance of maintaining hope and connection, advocating for a balanced approach that recognizes the complexities of faith and identity. 02:40 - Skyler's Journey with Same-Sex Attraction 06:00 - Navigating Identity and Labels 08:04 - The Importance of Open Communication in Relationships 09:53 - Early Experiences with Church Leaders 11:09 - Balancing Temptation and Faith 12:16 - The Role of Church Leaders in Discussing Marriage 16:14 - The Ideal of Eternal Marriage 17:26 - Addressing Criticism of Mixed Orientation Marriages 18:12 - The Importance of Seeking Validation from God 19:02 - The Desire to Share a Valid Path for LGBTQ Latter-day Saints 20:16 - The Tension Between Faith and Family 22:10 - Maintaining Relationships Amidst Differences 24:00 - Resources for Families and Individuals 29:19 - The Role of Therapy in Navigating Same-Sex Attraction 31:01 - Understanding Doctrine and Its Application 33:03 - Promoting the North Star Conference 36:06 - Validating the Path of Covenant-Keeping 39:21 - The Importance of Teaching Eternal Truths 40:56 - Finding Strength in the Temple 44:34 - Accessing Strength Through Eternal Perspective The award-winning Leading Saints Podcast is one of the top independent Latter-day Saints podcasts as part of nonprofit Leading Saints' mission to help Latter-day Saints be better prepared to lead. Learn more and listen to any of the past episodes for free at LeadingSaints.org. Past guests include Emily Belle Freeman, David Butler, Hank Smith, John Bytheway, Reyna and Elena Aburto, Liz Wiseman, Stephen M. R. Covey, Elder Alvin F. Meredith III, Julie Beck, Brad Wilcox, Jody Moore, Tony Overbay, John H. Groberg, Elaine Dalton, Tad R. Callister, Lynn G. Robbins, J. Devn Cornish,

Are you tired of repeating the same relationship patterns? Whether it's constant worry about abandonment or a tendency to keep people at arm's length, these behaviors - known as attachment styles - aren't set in stone. In part one of this two-part series, therapist Tony Overbay examines the science of attachment theory, tracing its development from John Bowlby and Mary Ainsworth's pioneering "Strange Situation" experiment to current research demonstrating how people can actually change their relationship patterns. Through clinical examples and accessible explanations, Tony breaks down how early experiences with caregivers create blueprints that influence adult relationships - and more importantly, why these patterns can evolve. Tony explains how understanding attachment style connects to emotional maturity and self-awareness. Listeners will learn about different attachment patterns, how they manifest in daily life, and why these early-developed patterns aren't a reflection of personal failure - they emerged before conscious choice was possible. This episode provides the foundation for a deeper exploration of attachment style change and relationship transformation. For anyone dealing with trust issues, abandonment fears, or struggles with emotional intimacy, the discussion offers concrete insights into becoming more secure in relationships. Part 2 will delve into specific strategies for building secure attachments and showing up differently in relationships. As Tony often says, "You're not broken, you're human" - and humans have a remarkable capacity for growth. 00:00 Welcome Back and New Beginnings 00:28 Understanding Narcissism and Emotional Maturity 02:05 Personal Struggles and Emotional Growth 04:40 Podcast Updates and Future Plans 06:59 Introduction to Attachment Theory 10:06 The Strange Situation Experiment 12:28 Attachment Styles and Their Impact 17:25 Early Childhood and Relationship Templates 21:04 Avoidant Attachment in Adulthood 22:07 The Painful Dance of Intimacy 23:52 The Role of Fathers in Attachment 24:37 Presence and Radiance: A Father's Influence 26:18 Emotional Safety and Consistency 29:31 Navigating Emotions and Independence 39:53 Challenges of Absent Fathers 44:12 Healing Attachment Wounds 44:33 Conclusion and Next Steps Find more from Tony Overbay: TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@virtualcouch Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/virtual.couch/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/tonyoverbaylmft/ Apple Podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-virtual-couch/id1275153998 Website: https://www.tonyoverbay.com/ Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/virtualcouch To learn more about Tony's upcoming re-release of the Magnetic Marriage course, his Pathback Recovery course, and more, sign up for his newsletter through the link at https://linktr.ee/virtualcouch Available NOW: Tony's "Magnetic Marriage Mini-Course" is only $25. https://magneticmarriage.mykajabi.com/magnetic-marriage-mini-course Subscribe to Tony's latest podcast, "Waking Up to Narcissism Q&A - Premium Podcast," on the Apple Podcast App. https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/waking-up-to-narcissism-q-a/id1667287384 Go to http://tonyoverbay.com/workshop to sign up for Tony's "Magnetize Your Marriage" virtual workshop. The cost is only $19, and you'll learn the top 3 things you can do NOW to create a Magnetic Marriage. You can learn more about Tony's pornography recovery program, The Path Back, by visiting http://pathbackrecovery.com And visit Tony mentioned a product that he used to take out all of the "uh's" and "um's" that, in his words, "must be created by wizards and magic!" because it's that good! To learn more about Descript, click here https://descript.com?lmref=bSWcEQ

This is a rebroadcast. The episode originally ran in February 2020. Tony Overbay is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, a Certified Mindful Habit Coach, and the host of two award-winning mental health podcasts, “The Virtual Couch” and “Waking Up to Narcissism.” Tony also co-hosts “Love, ADHD” with author Julie Lee, where they share their experiences of receiving ADHD diagnosis as adults, and Tony co-hosts two additional podcasts, “The Mind, The Mirror, and Me,” with his daughter Mackie, and “Murder on the Couch,” a true-crime meets therapy podcast with his daughter Sydney. Tony, Mackie, and Sydney offer live relationship advice weekly on TikTok, YouTube, and Instagram. He also serves on the Leading Saints Board of Therapists. Tony co-authored He's A Porn Addict, Now What? An Expert and a Former Addict Answer Your Questions and works with individuals and couples on issues such as addiction, betrayal, navigating faith journeys, and people “waking up” to their own emotional immaturity/narcissistic traits and tendencies. He has online courses for couples communication and parenting, a soon-to-be-released course on navigating faith journeys, and is the creator of The Path Back, an online, faith-based pornography recovery program. You can find out more about any of Tony's courses at https://tonyoverbay.com Tony is a father of four children and has been married to his high school sweetheart, Wendy, for 34 years. Before becoming a therapist, he spent a decade as a software executive and wrote a weekly humor column in a regional newspaper for nearly eight years. Tony is an avid runner, having completed over 100 marathons and ultramarathons, including a dozen races of 100 miles or more. Links TonyOverbay.com He's a Porn Addict...Now What?: An Expert and a Former Addict Answer Your Questions Clarifying Values PDF, from The Confidence Gap by Russ Harris Share your thoughts in the Leading Saints community Transcript coming soon Get 14-day access to the Core Leader Library Highlights This episode delves into the concept of codependency within the context of Latter-day Saint culture, where it often manifests as the "nice guy syndrome." Kurt shares his personal experiences as a bishop, highlighting how his own struggles with codependency and the pressure to maintain a perfect image affected his leadership. Tony defines codependency as an excessive emotional reliance on others for self-worth, often leading individuals to prioritize others' needs over their own. The conversation emphasizes the importance of acceptance and commitment therapy (ACT), which encourages individuals to accept their feelings and thoughts rather than avoid them. By focusing on personal values rather than identity, leaders can navigate their roles more effectively without succumbing to shame or self-doubt. The episode also touches on the significance of being present and acting according to one's values, rather than getting caught up in the pressures of perfectionism. 04:01 - Understanding Codependency 05:04 - The Nice Guy Syndrome 05:50 - Personal Struggles with Codependency 06:39 - Tony Overbay's Background 09:25 - Defining Codependency 10:52 - Codependency in Religious Contexts 11:42 - The Impact of Codependency on Self-Worth 13:00 - The Role of the Partner in Addiction Recovery 14:14 - The Importance of Individual Recovery 15:04 - The Connection Between Trauma and Codependency 16:22 - Addressing Codependency in Leadership 19:10 - Acceptance and Commitment Therapy Overview 20:49 - The Importance of Acceptance 22:40 - The Confidence Gap 24:18 - Values vs. Identity in Leadership 26:58 - The Role of External Validation 28:44 - The Bishop Monson Dynamic 31:06 - Systems vs. Goals in Personal Development 33:20 - Embracing Values in Leadership The award-winning Leading Saints Podcast is one of the top independent Latter-day Saints podcasts as part of nonprofit Leading Saints' mission to help Latter-day Saints be ...

Tony welcomes Ashlynn Allen to the podcast. Ashlynn shares her journey from fitness influencer to betrayal trauma survivor to empowerment coach and highlights the strength of facing life's challenges with authenticity and courage. Once part of the very successful “The Betrayed, the Addicted, and the Expert,” Ashlynn's story as the betrayal played out on the public stage only to surprisingly end in her ex-husband asking her for a divorce. She shares what it took to survive betrayal, navigate a divorce, and find an unexpected new chapter in life. Tony and Ashlynn dive deep into topics such as the messy parts of healing, the importance of vulnerability, and letting go of the need for certainty. Ashlynn also talks about how she found joy in roller skating and built a new relationship despite initial reservations. She also shares a powerful metaphor of how a buffalo weathers a storm. Tune in for this inspiring conversation about resilience, growth, and the power of facing life's storms head-on. You can learn more about Ashlynn at https://thisisashlynn.com/ or on Instagram @this.isashlynn 00:00 Introduction and Special Guest Announcement 00:15 Ashlyn Allen's Journey: From Fitness Influencer to Empowerment Coach 00:30 Meeting Ashlyn: The Beginning of a Transformative Friendship 00:44 Navigating Betrayal and Personal Growth 00:59 Ashlyn's Coaching Practice and Public Vulnerability 01:12 The Power of Sharing and Finding Joy in Healing 01:31 Deep Dive: Ashlyn's Experience with Betrayal Trauma 01:57 The Challenges and Rewards of Vulnerability 02:35 Tony and Ashlyn Reconnect: Reflecting on Past Collaborations 02:44 Ashlyn's Story: From Betrayal to Empowerment 05:27 The Impact of Public Vulnerability and Social Media 08:49 Therapy, Coaching, and the Journey to Healing 11:50 The Reality of Helping Others Through Personal Experience 13:15 The Emotional Toll of Public Vulnerability 18:08 The End of a Marriage: Acceptance and Growth 22:49 Finding Peace and Moving Forward 25:49 The Power of Surrender and Acceptance 28:28 Navigating Betrayal and Emotional Turmoil 31:40 The Roller Coaster of Healing and Self-Care 36:44 Embracing New Relationships and Personal Growth 42:38 Facing Life's Storms: The Buffalo Story 47:08 Conclusion and Final Thoughts Find more from Tony Overbay: Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/virtualcouch TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@virtualcouch Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/virtual.couch/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/tonyoverbaylmft/ Apple Podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-virtual-couch/id1275153998 Website: https://www.tonyoverbay.com/ Link Tree: https://linktr.ee/virtualcouch If you are interested in joining Tony's private Facebook group for women in narcissistic or emotionally immature relationships of any type, please reach out to him at contact@tonyoverbay.com or through the form on the website, HTTP://www.tonyoverbay.com If you are a man interested in joining Tony's "Emotional Architects" group to learn how to better navigate your relationship with a narcissistic or emotionally immature partner or learn how to become more emotionally mature yourself, please reach out to Tony at contact@tonyoverbay.com or through the form on the website, HTTP:www.tonyoverbay.com

Steve Hitz is a co-founder of Launching Leaders Worldwide, a faith-based nonprofit leadership program which helps young adults examine their lives, determine where they are now, where they want to be, and how to create their future while embracing their faith. He has founded companies, served as a young single adult bishop, and considers himself a Baby Boomer with a Millennial heart. Steve and his wife Ginger are blessed with three sons, two daughters, and eleven beloved grandchildren. Links Igniting the Holy Flame: Building Communities of Love from the Ashes of Negative Religious Culture Launching Leaders Worldwide Launching a Rising Generation of Leaders | An Interview with Steven Hitz and Michael Leonard Coming Alongside Youth & Young Adults | An Interview with Steve Hitz Steve Hitz articles at LeadingSaints.org Share your thoughts in the Leading Saints community Transcript coming soon Get 14-day access to the Core Leader Library Highlights Steve shares his personal journey following the loss of his son to suicide, which prompted him to explore the intersection of faith, community, and mental health. He discusses concerning statistics regarding church attendance and the challenges faced by young adults in maintaining their faith, particularly within the context of negative religious cultures that often emphasize rules and conformity over love and understanding. Steve introduces the concepts of "fabricated fellowship" and "harmful religiosity," explaining how these elements contribute to feelings of shame and disconnection among church members. He advocates for a shift towards authentic fellowship, where relationships are built on genuine care rather than obligation. The conversation delves into the idea of orthodoxy, contrasting "tight-fisted orthodoxy" with "open-hand orthodoxy," and emphasizes the need for leaders to be flexible and responsive to the spiritual needs of their congregations. Throughout the episode, Steve shares anecdotes and insights that illustrate the importance of love, mercy, and grace in religious practice. He encourages listeners to embrace a more holistic approach to worship that prioritizes personal connection and understanding over rigid adherence to rules. The episode concludes with Steve reflecting on the positive feedback he has received from readers of his book, who have found solace and inspiration in its message. 01:41 - Introduction to Igniting the Holy Flame by Steve Hitz 02:32 - The Impact of Personal Tragedy on Faith 06:04 - Statistics on Religious Attendance and Faith 09:24 - The Role of Questions in Faith 10:13 - Defining Religious Culture 12:27 - The Importance of Authentic Fellowship 13:36 - The Balance of Doctrine and Culture 15:41 - Understanding Orthodoxy: Open vs. Closed Fist 20:22 - The Role of the Holy Spirit in Leadership 23:06 - The Need for Authentic Relationships 25:06 - The Concept of Fabricated Fellowship 27:52 - Solutions for Authentic Fellowship 30:30 - The Importance of Living the Gospel 32:27 - Celebrating Individual Experiences in Faith 34:57 - Keeping the Fire of Faith Alive 36:41 - Feedback and Impact of the Book The award-winning Leading Saints Podcast is one of the top independent Latter-day Saints podcasts as part of nonprofit Leading Saints' mission to help Latter-day Saints be better prepared to lead. Learn more and listen to any of the past episodes for free at LeadingSaints.org. Past guests include Emily Belle Freeman, David Butler, Hank Smith, John Bytheway, Reyna and Elena Aburto, Liz Wiseman, Stephen M. R. Covey, Elder Alvin F. Meredith III, Julie Beck, Brad Wilcox, Jody Moore, Tony Overbay, John H. Groberg, Elaine Dalton, Tad R. Callister, Lynn G. Robbins, J. Devn Cornish, Bonnie Oscarson, Dennis B. Neuenschwander, Kirby Heyborne, Taysom Hill Anthony Sweat, John Hilton III, Barbara Morgan Gardner, Blair Hodges, Whitney Johnson, Ryan Gottfredson, Greg McKeown, Ganel-Lyn Condie, Michael Goodman,

James Willhite is an experiential therapist, coach, and consultant. He previously worked for 20 years in finance and sales management where he found a passion for speaking and coaching, then decided to switch careers and earned a Master's in Clinical Mental Health Counseling from Lamar University. With Steven Shields he co-founded Accepted, a collection of exclusively trained experiential guide who lead individuals, families, groups, and corporations to maximize their health and connection. James also serves on the board of three non-profit organizations (Unashamed Unafraid, A Warrior Heart, and Heart of a Woman) and firmly believes that as we work to remove the obstacles and barriers of trauma, our true and divine identity will be uncovered at our core. He loves spending time with his wife, Kristy and with his four children. Links AcceptedLife.com Share your thoughts in the Leading Saints community Read the transcript of this podcast Get 14-day access to the Core Leader Library Highlights James talks about the complexities of shame, particularly in the context of spirituality and personal growth. Wilhite addresses issues like anxiety, depression, addiction, and trauma in his practice. He highlights the subtle yet pervasive nature of shame, often overlooked in therapeutic settings, and how it can lead individuals to hide from God and themselves. The discussion delves into the biblical story of Adam and Eve, exploring how shame was introduced into the human experience and how it continues to affect individuals today. Wilhite explains that shame is a primary weapon used by the adversary to create distance between individuals and God, leading to feelings of inadequacy and the need to seek validation from others rather than from the divine. He emphasizes the importance of recognizing and naming shame to break free from its grip, encouraging listeners to understand their true identity as children of God. Throughout the episode, Wilhite offers practical advice for church leaders and individuals alike, urging them to embrace the inevitability of pain, work, and uncertainty in life as opportunities for growth rather than as punishments. He underscores the significance of leaning into God's goodness and trusting in His promises, even amidst struggles. The conversation culminates in a powerful reminder that healing is possible through understanding one's identity and the nature of God, ultimately inviting listeners to embark on their own "shame adventure" to foster healing and connection. 03:30 - Understanding Shame in Therapy 04:50 - Common Issues in Therapy Post-COVID 06:30 - The Role of Trauma in Therapy 08:00 - Experiential Therapy vs. Talk Therapy 09:30 - Importance of Finding the Right Therapist 10:50 - The Adam and Eve Story and Shame 12:30 - The Subtlety of Shame 14:00 - Hiding from God and Its Consequences 16:30 - The Cycle of Perfectionism and Shame 18:00 - Recognizing Shame in Leadership 19:30 - God's Nature and Our Identity 21:00 - The Importance of Self-Compassion 22:30 - The Journey of Healing from Shame 24:00 - God's Response to Adam and Eve 26:00 - Misinterpretation of God's Blessings 28:00 - Embracing Pain and Work as Inevitable 30:00 - Trusting God Amidst Uncertainty 32:00 - The Role of Pain in Growth 34:00 - Feeling to Heal: The Process of Therapy 36:00 - Allowing Ourselves to Feel Emotions 38:00 - Conclusion and Final Thoughts on Healing The award-winning Leading Saints Podcast is one of the top independent Latter-day Saints podcasts as part of nonprofit Leading Saints' mission to help Latter-day Saints be better prepared to lead. Learn more and listen to any of the past episodes for free at LeadingSaints.org. Past guests include Emily Belle Freeman, David Butler, Hank Smith, John Bytheway, Reyna and Elena Aburto, Liz Wiseman, Stephen M. R. Covey, Elder Alvin F. Meredith III, Julie Beck, Brad Wilcox, Jody Moore, Tony Overbay, John H. Groberg, Elaine Dalton, Tad R.