Stowe talks

More and more unmarried couples and friends are buying houses together, but the move comes with potentially serious financial risks. In this episode, Matt & Liza explain the importance of how a property is legally owned, the risks unmarried couples face and the legal options available to protect yourself financially if the love bubble bursts.  From Joint Tenants to a Declaration of Trust, this podcast is a must-listen for anyone looking to buy a house with a partner, friend, or family member. 00:38 Statistics on unmarried couples in the UK01:15  The total myth of the common law marriage01:20 The rights (or lack of) for unmarried couples 03:55 The importance of how the property is legally owned06:30 The different problems unmarried couples can face13:19 The legal options available to protect yourself financially13:54 The role of  A Declaration of Trust14:38 The role of A Cohabition Agreement 19:08 Matt & Liza's top tips for unmarried couples buying a house. What rights do cohabiting couples have? https://bit.ly/471wBed The rights of cohabiting couples https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KE_NNWjAL1g Prenups, postnups and petnups https://spoti.fi/3VGlTbd How mediation can help you separate https://bit.ly/3MdX4y4 Further advice on the Stowe website: https://www.stowefamilylaw.co.uk/stowe-support/unmarried-couples-advice/ If you need support with the issues raised in this podcast, or would like to speak to a family lawyer, contact Stowe at: https://bit.ly/35WPSj2 Join our list to get the latest from our lawyers, divorce coaches and relationship experts sent monthly to your inbox. Everything you need, in one

Going to the family court can be overwhelming, and cause high levels of stress, fear and confusion. Learning how to prepare and understand what will happen can help reduce anxiety and build resilience to navigate the day and deal with unexpected issues along the way.Leading divorce consultant Rhiannon Ford joined hosts Matt & Liza for this episode to share her tips and advice on how to prepare emotionally and practically for a family court hearing.00:38 Introductions to Rhiannon 01:24 What do people fear about the family court? 02:58 The different types of family court hearings 03:15 How to prepare for the first hearing 09:20 How to prepare for the second hearing 15:43 How to prepare for the final hearing 24:12 Rhiannon's three top tips to prepare for a family court hearingAdditional resources The role of the family court: https://bit.ly/480zrlh The dangers of a DIY divorce: https://bit.ly/3Tsvql7 Representing yourself in the family court (podcast):  https://bit.ly/472zXhdHow to represent yourself in the family court (video): https://youtu.be/1i4cD8bZYcM How to manage child hearings in the family court: https://youtu.be/gYg86a-A_l0How to get a financial consent order:  https://youtu.be/-FlSjw4tTXM If you need support with the issues raised in this podcast, or would like to speak to a family lawyer, contact Stowe at: https://bit.ly/35WPSj2 Join our list to get the latest from our lawyers, divorce coaches and relationship experts sent monthly to your inbox. Everything you need, in one

Debts can add a layer of extra stress and complication to couples trying to navigate a divorce. What happens if one person builds up debt during the marriage? Who is responsible for the debt? What about loans from the bank of Mum & Dad? In this episode, Matt & Liza explore the role of debt in divorce, the different types of debt and how they are viewed, who has responsibility for debits, the approach of the family courts and the link between debts and economic abuse. 00:00 Debt is often a part of divorce01:09 Can you get divorced when you are in debt? 02:39 What are the different types of debt?02:52 What are hard and soft loans? 06:40 What happens to any individual and shared debt? 08:48 How do you share any debt in a divorce?11:12 What happens if one person builds up debt during the marriage? 14:47 How does the family court approach debt in divorce? 15:16 What is the gasp factor? 16:17 The changing understanding of domestic and economic abuse 18:58 What are structured debt arrangements, and how do they impact any settlement? 20:39 Matt & Liza's top tips for dealing with debt in divorce Taking control of your finances on separation: https://youtu.be/CIp6n4pgd9k How to prepare for a financial settlement: https://youtu.be/ixzT30CyMo0 How to get a financial consent order:  https://youtu.be/-FlSjw4tTXM  The dangers of a DIY divorce: https://bit.ly/3Tsvql7 Recognising and dealing with economic abuse: https://spoti.fi/3VndusS Download our free in-depth handbook on how to complete a Form E: https://bit.ly/3A7MMvN and reviewing financial disclosure https://bit.ly/4hyZBjI If you need support with the issues raised in this podcast, or would like to speak to a family lawyer, contact Stowe at: https://bit.ly/35WPSj2 Join our list to get the latest from our lawyers, divorce coaches and relationship experts sent monthly to your inbox. Everything you need, in one

Inheritance can be one of the most emotive and complex elements of a financial settlement in divorce. So how is it usually dealt with? The bottom line is that inheritance isn't always safe in divorce, and there's no simple yes or no answer. In this episode, hosts Matt & Liza explore the tricky issue of inheritance and divorce, how the family court considers it and different ways to protect inheritance when you are married. 00:30 The tricky issue of inheritance00:50 How does the family court view inheritance?01:00 Matrinomal v non-matrimonial assets01:41 What is mingling? 03:16 The emotive issues of splitting inheritance 06:45 How can you protect your inheritance or lifetime gifts? 07:13 Postnups and trusts 09:26 What if the money is needed to meet people's needs? Additional resourcesTaking control of your finances on separation: https://youtu.be/CIp6n4pgd9k How to prepare for a financial settlement: https://youtu.be/ixzT30CyMo0How to get a financial consent order:  https://youtu.be/-FlSjw4tTXM Download our free in-depth handbook on how to complete a Form E: https://bit.ly/3A7MMvN and reviewing financial disclosure https://bit.ly/4hyZBjIIf you need support with the issues raised in this podcast, or would like to speak to a family lawyer, contact Stowe at: https://bit.ly/35WPSj2 Join our list to get the latest from our lawyers, divorce coaches and relationship experts sent monthly to your inbox. Everything you need, in one

Parental responsibility is a legal term that covers the rights of a parent to be involved in making decisions in the best interests of their children. But it's not just about Mum and Dad - it's possible for someone to have parental responsibility for a child without being their legal parent, and for a legal parent to not have parental responsibility.In this episode, hosts Matt & Liza break down the myths surrounding parental responsibility, who can we have it, and who can't, if you can lose parental responsibility, and what legal options are available if those with it cannot agree on what is best for the kids. 00:30 What is parental responsibility?02:25 Parental responsibility as a legal concept 02:48 What parental responsibility isn't?03:40 Who has parental responsibility?04:53 The different rules for Mum & Dad06:46 Who else can be granted parental responsibility? 07:33 The use of special guardianship orders to share parental responsibility09:48 How can you lose parental responsibility? 11:30 Examples of cases where parental responsibility has been removed14:00 If you lose parental responsibility, can you ever get it back? 15:32 What can you do if those with parental responsibility cannot agree? 15:54 The use of specific issue orders Please note this podcast focuses on heterosexual couples for the purpose of time. To learn more about same-sex parents and their legal issues on our website: https://www.stowefamilylaw.co.uk/family-law/fertility-lawyers/ Supporting children through divorce: https://youtu.be/tMbi1vqkg4E Parenting alongside a narcissist https://youtu.be/b10mkX4Y3og  How to get a child arrangements order? https://youtu.be/YRnaUVqn95c  How to vary a child arrangements order? https://youtu.be/ackFKq5ITJU  How to get a prohibited steps order: https://youtu.be/W-bvdF1qbgwWhat is a specific issue order: https://shorturl.at/VwxYj If you need support with the issues raised in this podcast, or would like to speak to a family lawyer, contact Stowe at: https://bit.ly/35WPSj2 Join our list to get the latest from our lawyers, divorce coaches and relationship experts sent monthly to your inbox. Everything you need, in one

Domestic abuse is complex, multi-layered, and all consuming for survivors. For those in minority communities, it can present further unique challenges that need specialist support. Domestic Abuse Consultant, specialising in post-separation abuse and creator of You Don't Own Me, Lucy Wade joined us to share her knowledge of the challenges faced by survivors of abuse in minority communities, and what support is available.  If you are a victim/survivor of domestic abuse, or supporting someone else in this situation, this podcast will help. 00:00 Welcome00:37 Introduction to Lucy and her work 01:44 The different types of minority communities 02:48 What is domestic abuse? 03:23 Domestic abuse is not just physical abuse 03:54 The prevalence of certain types of domestic abuse in different communities 04:52 The role of the extended family and wider community06:00 The stigma of divorce and impact on faith and religion08:22 The fear of the unknown and losing everything 09:50 The fear of their children being taken away from 11:15 The awareness of domestic abuse in minority communities 13:44 The barrier of language and being understood 15:54 The lack of cultural understanding 17:42 Why do people decide to stay? 18:34 On average, it takes 7 attempts to leave. Is it more in minority communities? 20:10 The prevalence of so-called honour based violence 22:10 Dealing with the self-blame and shame 23:05 We need to understand more so we can support better 23:28 What needs to be improved to better support people from minority communities?  26:38 Accessing support for domestic abuse29:45 How can people help survivors of abuse?31:58 Challenges for male survivors of domestic abuse33:22 Lucy's top tipsLucy's website: https://ydom.co.uk/resources-for-everyone/ Are you in a relationship with a narcissist? https://t.ly/yEiw2 Divorcing or separating from a narcissist - https://bit.ly/3ROxpyQ   Domestic abuse - how can a family lawyer help? https://youtu.be/bto4CXasGz0  Dealing with post-separation abuse - https://bit.ly/3veGwzR   Rebuilding your life after narcissistic abuse: https://bit.ly/422YtMJ  If you need support with the issues raised in this podcast, or would like to speak to a family lawyer, contact Stowe at: https://bit.ly/35WPSj2 Join our list to get the latest from our lawyers, divorce coaches and relationship experts sent monthly to your inbox. Everything you need, in one

Abusive relationships rarely start abusive. Instead, they build up over, slowly, over time, gradually changing the survivors perception of reality and sense of self.  As our guest for this episode, domestic abuse expert and coach, Caron Kipping says: “If someone punched you in the face on your first date,  would you go back for a second date?” The answer is an obvious no, but domestic abuse slowly draws in survivors, leaving them trapped, isolated, confused and abused. Would you know the early signs of an abusive relationship? Take a listen as Caron explains what the red flags are and what you can do if they are there.00:00 Introductions 01:53 What is domestic abuse? 05:00 How can you spot the early red flags of domestic abuse? 11:15 What can you do if you have concerns that your relationship is abusive? 14:16 The tactic of isolation, and its impact 17:22 What happens as the relationship progresses?18:02 What can family and friends do if they have concerns? 20:47 What is the cycle of abuse and stages of change?  24:02 How does the cycle get worse? 25:00 How do you leave an abusive relationship? 26:00 Make a plan, with professional help Additional resourcesSurviving economic abuse - https://bit.ly/3v7uAA4  Divorcing or separating from a narcissist - https://bit.ly/3ROxpyQ  Domestic abuse - how can a family lawyer help? https://youtu.be/bto4CXasGz0  Dealing with post-separation abuse with Caron - https://bit.ly/3veGwzR  Taking control of your finances on separation - https://youtu.be/CIp6n4pgd9k If you need support with the issues raised in this podcast, or would like to speak to a family lawyer, contact Stowe at: https://bit.ly/35WPSj2 Join our list to get the latest from our lawyers, divorce coaches and relationship experts sent monthly to your inbox. Everything you need, in one

In most divorces, couples face challenges around the mortgage. From who will pay for it whilst you separate, to working out mortgage affordability for your next home. And with interest rates still high, a growing housing crisis and an expert predicted rocky 12-18 months ahead, we asked Charlotte Tollitt, a Mortgage Broker from Meet Margo, to join us to talk about all things mortgage and divorce. 00:00 Introductions 01:30 Mortgages are a common issue in divorce 02:30 What happens if you don't pay your mortgage? 04:20 Who does the bank chase for the mortgage payments?05:30 What are your options for living arrangements while you separate?09:23 What happens if you cannot agree what to do with the mortgage?09:52 What happens if the mortgage is in one name?12:10 How do you buy someone out of a mortgage? 14:39 How do lenders work out mortgage affordability? 18:40 How do you transfer the family home into a sole name?20:40 What are the advantages of using a mortgage broker like Meet Margo?21:57 How mortgages can be a tool of economic abuse24:26 How mortgage brokers and lenders can support survivors of abuse?25:16 The impact of interest rates on mortgage rates 27:32 Charlotte's top tips on how to deal with your mortgage if you are separatingPacked full of advice and tips, this is a must listen podcast for anyone struggling to deal with a mortgage during a divorce.  Additional informationWho gets this house in a divorce? https://spoti.fi/4cgey7m Surviving economic abuse - https://bit.ly/3v7uAA4 The first things to do if you are getting divorced: https://spoti.fi/4bH3OxP How to prepare for a financial settlement: https://shorturl.at/bnpQT The dangers of a DIY divorce: https://bit.ly/3Tsvql7 How to get a financial consent order: https://youtu.be/-FlSjw4tTXM  Recognising and dealing with economic abuse:https://spoti.fi/3VndusS If you need support with the issues raised in this podcast, or would like to speak to a family lawyer, contact Stowe at: https://bit.ly/35WPSj2 Join our list to get the latest from our lawyers, divorce coaches and relationship experts sent monthly to your inbox. Everything you need, in one

The gasp factor, what should be the real headline of financial abuse, things must change and our collective responsibility…We're back for season 6 as we welcome leading 4PB Barrister Anita Mehta, who juggles a busy practice of complex financial remedy and children disputes with lecturing, writing and podcasting to look at how domestic abuse plays out in financial proceedings. Co-author of the recent Resolution report on this matter, Anita takes us back to the history of how the family court has viewed domestic abuse, where we are today and makes a loud and clear call for change. 00:00 Introductions02:10 The background to the Resolution report: Domestic abuse in Financial Proceedings 05:03 How does the family court currently consider domestic abuse? 05:34 A (sometimes shocking) history lesson on the family court, domestic abuse and divorce07:20 What behaviour is taken into account by the court?08:53 What is the gasp factor? 09:49 The unfairness sometimes of the situation 11:48 But things are starting to change…13:10 The understanding of domestic abuse is finally evolving13:52 The impact of this new understanding on lawyers and courts 18:09 The recommendations of the report18:35 We have to do everything better to make the process safer19:39 The role of NCDR and the right to choose 22:23 What practical things are needed to change to support victims / survivors?26:53 The red flags of economic abuse 31:00 Recommendations for people who cannot afford legal support 38:00 What needs to happen next?42:21 Expert advice for anyone dealing with domestic abuse Additional informationSurviving economic abuse - https://bit.ly/3v7uAA4   Divorcing or separating from a narcissist - https://bit.ly/3ROxpyQ  Domestic abuse - how can a family lawyer help? https://youtu.be/bto4CXasGz0  Dealing with post-separation abuse - https://bit.ly/3veGwzR  Taking control of your finances on separation - https://youtu.be/CIp6n4pgd9k You can read the full Resolution report on domestic abuse in financial remedy proceedings here. If you need support with the issues raised in this podcast, or would like to speak to a family lawyer, contact Stowe at: https://bit.ly/35WPSj2 Join our list to get the latest from our lawyers, divorce coaches and relationship experts sent monthly to your inbox. Everything you need, in one

In April 2024, changes were made to the Family Procedure Rules to encourage more people to use non-court-based methods to resolve financial issues arising from divorce or over their children. Matt & Liza discuss these changes and share their (sometimes very different) opinions on what they think about the changes, and what does it actually mean for separating couples?00:30 What are the Family Procedure Rules? 01:01 What were the changes? 01:31 What is non-court dispute resolution (NCDR)?03:30 What are the positives of the changes? And how will it work in practice?07:00 How are the family courts approaching it?08:25 What are the limitations?14:24 What about cases with domestic abuse or power imbalance? 17:56 Is NCDR actually a cheaper alternative? 21:23 Is the family court slowly being privatised?23:02 Will the changes actually make any difference?24:17 The role of case law from NA v LA [2024] EWFC 113 (24 May 2024) and its limitations27:11 The challenges of the changes 28:35 How do the changes impact separating couples, and what do they need to do? Additional resources The role of the family court: https://bit.ly/480zrlh  The dangers of a DIY divorce: https://bit.ly/3Tsvql7 Representing yourself in the family court (podcast): https://bit.ly/472zXhdHow to represent yourself in the family court (video): https://youtu.be/1i4cD8bZYcM How to manage child hearings in the family court: https://youtu.be/gYg86a-A_l0How mediation can help you separate: https://bit.ly/3MdX4y4  Download our free in-depth handbook on how to complete a Form E: https://bit.ly/3A7MMvN or Beginner's Guide to Divorce: https://bit.ly/beginnersdivorceguide If you need support with the issues raised in this podcast, or would like to speak to a family lawyer, contact Stowe at: https://bit.ly/35WPSj2 Join our list to get the latest from our lawyers, divorce coaches and relationship experts sent monthly to your inbox. Everything you need, in one

In the second part of this episode, Dr Supriya McKenna, a highly experienced specialist narcissism expert, continues to share her advice and practical tools and techniques to help people prepare to leave a narcissist. (You can access the first part of this episode here.)We pick the conversation back up as Dr Supriyas shares her advice on preparing financially, before exploring how to stay safe online, saving previous communications, and keeping personal items safe. Before closing with her top tops. Again, Matt & Liza share their insight into how the law can help and the pitfalls to avoid. 01:48 How to financially prepare for a narcissistic divorce 03:00 The paperwork you need to gather04:45 A legal warning on how to access financial information 11:50 How to protect joint assets and accounts 15:50 Covering interim costs and bills 17:58 How to protect yourself online 28:49 Saving previous communications safely for evidence32:45 Keeping personal and sentimental items safe35:44 Checking and securing smart home devices37:35 Dr Supriya's top tips for preparing to leave a narcissist If you are in immediate danger of domestic abuse, call the police on 999. You can also access help and support from the 24-hour National Domestic Abuse Helpline on 0808 2000 247 or the Mankind Initiative support helpline: 01823 334 244. Divorcing or separating from a narcissist: https://youtu.be/rCCfyHHKCfk Parenting alongside a narcissist https://youtu.be/b10mkX4Y3og Rebuilding your life after narcissistic abuse: https://bit.ly/422YtMJ Are you in a relationship with a narcissist? https://t.ly/yEiw2 You buy Dr Supriya's books on narcissism on Amazon here: https://www.amazon.co.uk/stores/author/B08P9YBNYR Understanding and dealing with tech abuse https://bit.ly/3RQ6dzU Download our free in-depth handbook on how to complete a Form E: https://bit.ly/3A7MMvN The encrypted email service mentioned in this podcast is Proton Mail: https://proton.me/mail If you need support with the issues raised in this podcast, or would like to speak to a family lawyer, contact Stowe at: https://bit.ly/35WPSj2 Join our list to get the latest from our lawyers, divorce coaches and relationship experts sent monthly to your inbox. Everything you need, in one

In the first of this two-parter episode, Matt and Liza were delighted to be joined again by Dr Supriya McKenna, one of the leading experts in the field of narcissism, to discuss how to prepare to leave a narcissist. Dr Supriya shares her deep knowledge of narcissism, why it is harder to leave one, including hoovering and gaslighting, finding the right lawyer, and practical tips on the preparations needed to end your relationship. Meanwhile, Matt & Liza share legal insight, the options available to you and the pitfalls to avoid. 00:00 Introductions 02:34 Why is it harder to leave a relationship with a narcissist?04:44 Why gaslighting will increase post-separation05:33 Examples of how a narcissist behaviour plays out in divorce  07:50 What is hoovering? And how does the narcissist use this? 13:40 There is a hole in my sidewalk by Portia Nelson 15:08 The prevalence of narcissistic abuse post divorce 19:00 How to prepare to leave a narcissist19:30 Find the right therapy and therapist 21:10 Don't tell the narcissist, you know they are a narcissist 24:01 How to find the right lawyer 36:33 The importance of due diligence when selecting your lawyerYou can listen to part 2 of this episode here. If you are in immediate danger of domestic abuse, call the police on 999. You can also access help and support from the 24-hour National Domestic Abuse Helpline on 0808 2000 247 or the Mankind Initiative support helpline: 01823 334 244. Divorcing or separating from a narcissist: https://youtu.be/rCCfyHHKCfkParenting alongside a narcissist https://youtu.be/b10mkX4Y3ogRebuilding your life after narcissistic abuse: https://bit.ly/422YtMJAre you in a relationship with a narcissist? https://t.ly/yEiw2You buy Dr Supriya's books on narcissism on Amazon here: https://www.amazon.co.uk/stores/author/B08P9YBNYRUnderstanding and dealing with tech abuse https://bit.ly/3RQ6dzUDownload our free in-depth handbook on how to complete a Form E: https://bit.ly/3A7MMvNThe encrypted email service mentioned in this podcast is Proton Mail: https://proton.me/mail If you need support with the issues raised in this podcast, or would like to speak to a family lawyer, contact Stowe at: https://bit.ly/35WPSj2 Join our list to get the latest from our lawyers, divorce coaches and relationship experts sent monthly to your inbox. Everything you need, in one

In this bite size episode, hosts Matt & Liza turn their attention to another popular question that clients frequently ask: How much does it cost to get divorced? They talk through typical costs, the different ways to reduce costs, for example reaching agreement together or using mediation, and what you can do personally to save money during the process. All in just under 8 minutes.00:33 The cost of the divorce application 01:15 How much does a typical financial settlement cost? 02:05 What are the ways to keep costs down and save money?  04:59 What can you do personally to keep costs down? Please note the prices quoted in this video were correct in August 2024 and are subject to change. Additional resourcesWhere do I start? A beginner's guide to divorce: https://bit.ly/3v0md9g The first things to do if you are getting divorced: https://spoti.fi/4bH3OxP How to prepare for a financial settlement: https://shorturl.at/bnpQT The dangers of a DIY divorce: https://bit.ly/3Tsvql7 How to get a financial consent order: https://youtu.be/-FlSjw4tTXM  How to get divorced online: https://youtu.be/-LWs1MrGnT4Representing yourself in the family court: https://bit.ly/472zXhdDownload our free in-depth handbook on how to complete a Form E: https://bit.ly/3A7MMvN If you need support with the issues raised in this podcast, or would like to speak to a family lawyer, contact Stowe at: https://bit.ly/35WPSj2 Join our list to get the latest from our lawyers, divorce coaches and relationship experts sent monthly to your inbox. Everything you need, in one

In this bite size episode, hosts Matt & Liza turn their attention to a popular question they hear from many of their clients: How long does it take to get divorced? They talk through the process, how long it takes, the impact of the family court, the myth of the quickie divorce, before closing on their top tips to help speed up the process as much as possible. All in just under 8 minutes. 00:30 What is the process for getting divorced?02:20 How long does it take to get divorced? 03:10 How does the family court impact timescales?04:24 Are there any ways to speed up the divorce process?05:15 Can you have a quickie divorce? 06:20 What are the top tips to speed up your divorce?Additional resourcesWhere do I start? A beginner's guide to divorce: https://bit.ly/3v0md9gThe first things to do if you are getting divorced: https://spoti.fi/4bH3OxPHow to prepare for a financial settlement: https://shorturl.at/bnpQTThe dangers of a DIY divorce: https://bit.ly/3Tsvql7How to get a financial consent order: https://youtu.be/-FlSjw4tTXM How to get divorced online: https://youtu.be/-LWs1MrGnT4Download our free in-depth handbook on how to complete a Form E: https://bit.ly/3A7MMvNIf you need support with the issues raised in this podcast, or would like to speak to a family lawyer, contact Stowe at: https://bit.ly/35WPSj2 Join our list to get the latest from our lawyers, divorce coaches and relationship experts sent monthly to your inbox. Everything you need, in one

In this episode, hosts Matt & Liza explore what options are available for people if their ex-partner will not respond to the initial divorce application, refuses to disclose any information, or provides incorrect or misses details when trying to resolve finances. They dive into your legal options so you can progress your divorce, how to track down a missing ex, the role the family court can play, managing the emotional impact and anxiety, and top tips for dealing with your ex throughout the process. 00:30 How common is it for someone not to respond to a divorce?01:10 The different ways people choose to avoid divorce  02:20 What can you do if you do not know where your ex is or will not respond to the divorce?03:26 What is substituted service, and how can it help? 04:50 What is deemed service? 05:15 What is a dispense with service application? And its challenges05:50 What happens if someone will not disclose their financial information? (Form E)07:05 What can you do if people will not respond to financial disclosure?07:30 The role of questionnaires if information is incomplete08:03 What happens if they continue to ignore it? - The penal notice 08:42 The case Young v Young 2015 10:48 Can you make court orders without one person's approval? 11:35 The pitfalls of not responding to a divorce15:10 The role of inferences in the family court 17:07 Top tips to dealing with an ex who will not respond to the divorce 18:05 Focus on what you can control 18:30 The importance of working with a divorce coach Additional resources Download our free in-depth handbook on how to complete a Form E: https://bit.ly/3A7MMvN  Where do I start? A beginner's guide to divorce: https://bit.ly/3v0md9gThe first things to do if you are getting divorced: https://spoti.fi/4bH3OxPHow to prepare for a financial settlement: https://shorturl.at/bnpQTThe dangers of a DIY divorce: https://bit.ly/3Tsvql7How to get a financial consent order: https://youtu.be/-FlSjw4tTXM How to get divorced online: https://youtu.be/-LWs1MrGnT4If you need support with the issues raised in this podcast, or would like to speak to a family lawyer, contact Stowe at: https://bit.ly/35WPSj2 Join our list to get the latest from our lawyers, divorce coaches and relationship experts sent monthly to your inbox. Everything you need, in one

Narcissism has become a popular buzzword.  But despite the interest, there are many myths that undermine the complexity and destructive impact of this personality disorder.We were delighted to be joined again by Dr Supriya McKenna, one of the leading experts in the field of narcissism, to discuss how you can tell if you are in a relationship with a ‘real' narcissist, and why knowing this is so important, particularly if you want to leave them.  00:00 Introductions 02:25 Why is it important to know that you are in a relationship with a ‘real' narcissist?03:05 Why are narcissist divorces so much tougher?04:50 How do you work out if you are in a relationship with a narcissist? 05:30 Switching your thinking from the narcissist behaviour to the impact on you. 07:30 A checklist for whether you are in a relationship with a narcissist17:54 What are the effects of being in a narcissistic relationship? 20:12 The narcissist behaving as a toddler 21:27 What is gaslighting, and how do you know if it is happening to you?24:40 The terrifying drop of the narcissist mask27:01 What do you need to consider when deciding if you should leave a narcissist?27:30 What is the impact on your children?34:05 How you and your lawyer should handle the legal side 43:11 The trauma of the family court 43:44 The use of open offers v without prejudice offers when divorcing a narcissist 50:30 What can people do next? Further resources to help. Tune in for an episode that balances a deep insight into narcissism and the legal options available to you. If you are in immediate danger from domestic abuse, call the police on 999. You can also access help and support from the 24-hour National Domestic Abuse Helpline on 0808 2000 247 or the Mankind Initiative support helpline: 01823 334 244. Additional resources You can catch up on Supriya's previous podcasts below. Divorcing or separating from a narcissist: https://youtu.be/rCCfyHHKCfk Parenting alongside a narcissist https://youtu.be/b10mkX4Y3og Rebuilding your life after narcissistic abuse: https://bit.ly/422YtMJ You buy Dr Supriya's books on narcissism on Amazon here: https://www.amazon.co.uk/stores/author/B08P9YBNYR If you need support with the issues raised in this podcast, or would like to speak to a family lawyer, contact Stowe at: https://bit.ly/35WPSj2 Join our list to get the latest from our lawyers, divorce coaches and relationship experts sent monthly to your inbox. Everything you need, in one

High-net-worth divorce brings its own unique challenges, especially around understanding, valuing and dividing complex earning structures, assets and pensions, often with international elements. In this episode, Ceri Griffiths a chartered financial planner specialising in supporting women divorcing high earners shares her advice on how to navigate the unique issues that high-net-worth divorce can bring. 01:43 What is a high net worth divorce? 03:40 Common power imbalances in high-net-worth marriages 05:00 The lack of knowledge and understanding around finances 05:40 The prevalence of narcissism in CEOs and challenges08:55 What is the sharing principle in divorce?10:00 The legal bit on needs v sharing in divorce 14:04 The importance of due diligence 15:30 Understanding complex earning structures 21:19 Challenges of Private Equity and Hedge Managers remuneration23:48 The division of assets and Wells sharing 27:14 Understanding what you need for the future and life post-divorce28:50 What is cashflow forecasting, and how does it help? 31:18 Looking beyond the 50/50 percentages32:10 Specific challenges of high-net-worth divorce 33:14 Breaking the gold digger myth34:00 Getting a final outcome you can live with 36:35 Ceri's top tips for people going through a high-net-worth divorce Additional resourcesTaking control of your finances on separation: https://youtu.be/CIp6n4pgd9k  Understanding pensions on divorce: https://bit.ly/41ryik4  Divorcing or separating from a narcissist:  https://youtu.be/rCCfyHHKCfk Recognising and dealing with economic abuse: https://spoti.fi/3VndusS How to prepare for your financial settlement: https://shorturl.at/bnpQT If you need support with the issues raised in this podcast, or would like to speak to a family lawyer, contact Stowe at: https://bit.ly/35WPSj2 Join our list to get the latest from our lawyers, divorce coaches and relationship experts sent monthly to your inbox. Everything you need, in one

You may have made the decision, or had it made for you, but however you arrived at the moment, facing a divorce can be dauntingSo what should you do first? In this episode, family lawyers and hosts Matt & Liza share their tips on the most important things to do and consider before getting a divorce.00:00 Introductions 01:00 The different scenarios 01:10 The first thing to do is take your time 03:00 Getting in the right headspace 03:29 Building your support team 05:10 Use of divorce coaches and counsellors 05:45 The role of online resources, including Stowe support 08:10 Understand you are at different stages 09:50 The next three things you need to do11:40 Managing finances15:10 How to support your children17:10 Preparing for your first lawyer meeting 22:05 How to tell your partner your marriage is over 28:20 The most important thing to do from Matt & Liza Additional resources Where do I start? A beginner's guide to divorce: https://youtu.be/EhFpi8K9VZQ Taking control of your finances on separation: https://youtu.be/CIp6n4pgd9k  How to prepare for a financial settlement: https://youtu.be/ixzT30CyMo0 The dangers of a DIY divorce: https://bit.ly/3Tsvql7 How to get a financial consent order: https://youtu.be/-FlSjw4tTXM  How to get divorced online: https://youtu.be/-LWs1MrGnT4 If you need support with the issues raised in this podcast, or would like to speak to a family lawyer, contact Stowe at: https://bit.ly/35WPSj2 Join our list to get the latest from our lawyers, divorce coaches and relationship experts sent monthly to your inbox. Everything you need, in one

It is normal to face challenges in a relationship, but what happens when one, or both people, completely disconnects and thoughts turn to leaving? How do you know the right time to end a relationship?In this episode, divorce coach Dr. Sue Palmer-Conn joined us to discuss the challenging question of whether to stay or go, including common stress points and challenges couples face, how discernment counselling can help them make a decision, and why divorce or separation can change your life for the better. Chapters00:00 Introductions 03:07 What is discernment counselling? And how can it help a relationship?  03:43 The impact of losing connection 05:00 The limitations of marriage guidance 05:19 How does discernment counselling work? 09:09 What are common trigger points in relationships? 09:21 The different ways to disconnect 10:25 Making the decision to stay or go11:34 What are the three main outcomes of discernment counselling?12:30 Does it help make divorce more dignified?14:08 How long does the process take? 19:30 How do you keep communication in a relationship going? 22:15 How do you break a rut in a relationship? 25:00 The pressure of time on a relationship 27:00 The impact of children 29:10 Retirement and empty nesters30:00 Is the concept of marriage now outdated? 32:55 Sometimes leaving the relationship is the best decision 34:10 Separation can be positive 34:28 Sue's top tips for people thinking about ending the relationship Catch-up on Sue's first podcast, dealing with a relationship breakdown during menopause https://bit.ly/3RQ5e2G The dangers of a DIY divorce - https://bit.ly/3Tsvql7 Finding the unexpected joy of heartbreak with Rosie Wilby  https://youtu.be/nmXO_2Rgv70 Where do I start? A beginner's guide to divorce: https://youtu.be/EhFpi8K9VZQHandling fear and uncertainty: https://youtu.be/hQqziVrHnRg If you need support with the issues raised in this podcast, or would like to speak to a family lawyer, contact Stowe at: https://bit.ly/35WPSj2 Join our list to get the latest from our lawyers, divorce coaches and relationship experts sent monthly to your inbox. Everything you need, in one

Introducing a new partner to your kids can be complicated, and requires careful thought and planning to get it right. So we asked parenting and relationship coach Nichole Farrow to join us to share her advice on how to introduce a new partner, including: Fostering good communication with the other parent The importance of a gradual introduction - baby steps all the way Ensuring thoughtful planningSetting and sticking to boundariesThe challenges and joy of a blended family And the need for patience, allowing time for adjustment in the new family dynamics.00:00 Introductions 02:00The generation of divorce 03:35 What to think about before introducing a new partner 04:50 Letting your co-parent know first08:10 How to tell your co-parent, you have a new partner 12:50 How to introduce a new partner to your children 14:20 If you take anything away, it's take baby steps 14:38 Tips on how to help children if it is not managed correctly 18:45 Do different aged children need a different approach? 21:10 How to best introduce the children to each other 23:00 Adapting to new roles and family dynamics 23:42 How to introduce yourself to your partner's children26:20 The role of stepparents 28:06 The importance of setting clear boundaries for all 29:05 The use of parenting plans 29:26 How to handle and nurture blended families 31:07 What can you do if your blended family is not working well? 34:14 Nichole's top tips for introducing a new partner Additional resourcesSupporting children through divorce: https://youtu.be/tMbi1vqkg4EHow to co-parent calmly and the challenges of blended families - https://youtu.be/7OGpehg2cws Parenting alongside a narcissist https://youtu.be/b10mkX4Y3og How to get a child arrangements order? https://youtu.be/YRnaUVqn95c How to vary a child arrangements order? https://youtu.be/ackFKq5ITJU Do I need my ex's permission to take the kids on holiday https://youtu.be/Qi-Wg4mqjno  If you need support with the issues raised in this podcast, or would like to speak to a family lawyer, contact Stowe at: https://bit.ly/35WPSj2 Join our list to get the latest from our lawyers, divorce coaches and relationship experts sent monthly to your inbox. Everything you need, in one

School holidays can be difficult to juggle for any parents, but for those separated and co-parenting, it can bring a whole host of additional issues. In this episode, hosts Matt & Liza were joined by The Divorce & Separation Coach, Chloe O. to look at the best way to plan the holidays as a separated parent. Take a listen as they explore the challenges of planning holidays, the importance of communication, flexibility, and child-focused decision-making.  How to address objections, your legal options and the use of mediation to resolve any issues, along with practical advice for navigating the complexities of summer holidays when at home. 02:16 Why are holidays sometimes a contentious issue?03:05 When should you discuss holidays, and what is the best way to do this? 04:14 What are the common objections about holidays? 06:20 The importance of flexibility and planning 07:30 How to minimise the impact on your children08:25 How to manage the emotional impact of being apart from your children 14:29 What you definitely shouldn't do when holiday planning with your ex16:45 What should you do when holiday planning? 17:20 What are the potential legal issues?17:54 What are your legal options if you cannot agree on holidays?19:50 Resolving differences through mediation. 21:45 The role of a parenting plan or Child Arrangements Order (CAO)22:08 How to handle a new partner going on holiday with your kids 23:11 Planning holidays when you are not going away 28:20 Chloe's top tips for summer holiday planning for separated parentsAdditional resourcesSupporting children through divorce: https://youtu.be/tMbi1vqkg4EHow to co-parent calmly and the challenges of blended families - https://youtu.be/7OGpehg2cws How to get a child arrangements order? https://youtu.be/YRnaUVqn95c Do I need my ex's permission to take the kids on holiday https://youtu.be/Qi-Wg4mqjno We need your help. We love making the Stowe talks podcast. And we want to enter it for the Listener's Choice awards at the British Podcast Awards. So please vote for us: https://www.britishpodcastawards.com/voting  Simply search for Stowe talks and cast your vote by 29 August 2024. Thank you.If you need support with the issues raised in this podcast, or would like to speak to a family lawyer, contact Stowe at: https://bit.ly/35WPSj2 Join our list to get the latest from our lawyers, divorce coaches and relationship experts sent monthly to your inbox. Everything you need, in one

The family home can often be the most emotive element of a divorce. Steeped in memories, many ex-couples face the difficult decision about what to do with the house, in the short and long term. In this episode, hosts Matt & Liza deep dive into all things property and divorce including: 00:35 Why is the family home so important? 01:56 The legal ownership of a property - joint tenants v tenants in common04:00 What happens if the house is in one person's name?06:00 The importance of Wills07:25 Living together or moving out during the separation? Options and considerations of both.08:08 If one person moves out, can you change the locks? 11:47 Who is responsible for the mortgage? 13:20 What happens to the household bills? 14:00 Options on what to do with the mortgage 14:47 The importance of budgeting and maximising income16:08 How to decide what to do with the family home16:49 Family home v the pension 16:55 The dangers of ignoring pensions 17:58 The potential impact on children, and how to handle it 19:33 What are the legal options for the family home in divorce proceedings?23:56 The difficulty in determining the value of the property27:22 When is the best time to sell the house?33:30 What if the other person refuses to sell the house?38:30 Tops tips on dealing with the family home during divorce  If you need support with the issues raised in this podcast, or would like to speak to a family lawyer, you can contact Stowe at: https://bit.ly/35WPSj2   Additional informationBudgeting during a cost of living crisis https://youtu.be/LE-NCCOiiB4 The dangers of a DIY divorce - https://bit.ly/3Tsvql7 Taking control of your finances on separation: https://youtu.be/CIp6n4pgd9k  How to prepare for a financial settlement: https://youtu.be/ixzT30CyMo0How to get a financial consent order:  https://youtu.be/-FlSjw4tTXM Creating financial well-being https://youtu.be/SHADBMdHf4Y?si=xodKZkigxaAZvsgd Join our list to get the latest from our lawyers, divorce coaches and relationship experts sent monthly to your inbox. Everything you need, in one

No longer the preserve of the ultra- wealthy, prenups, postnups and petnups are on the rise. But what are they, what can they cover, and do they stand up in court?Take a listen as Matt & Liza dive into nuptial agreements, the advantages, the challenges, and the laws surrounding them. Along with when and how they are useful, especially for people marrying later in life, wanting to protect family assets or preserve inheritance for their kids, and when they are not. Conversation then moves to the rise of the petnup, how pets are viewed in divorce, the need to recognise the importance of people's fur-babies, and whether this will change over time. Before closing, with a discussion around the pitfalls of making these agreements legally binding, and surprise guest appearances from Matt's dog Crumble and Liza's dog, Duke. 00:00 What is a prenup? What is a postnup?01:22 Why would you get a prenup or postnup?01:38 What are the advantages of prenups and postnups?04:16 What are the disadvantages of prenups and postnups?05:52 What is the law surrounding prenups and postnups? 11:44 What are the benefits of prenups?15:00 Who should consider a prenup or postnup? 16:05 The role of property, unequal assets, inheritance, marrying later in life, and second and third marriages17:39 What are the challenges of a prenup and postnup? 20:00 The importance of review dates within a prenup and postnup23:47 The importance of understanding the power of these agreements 23:51 Celebrity prenups and postnups are sometimes not helpful 24:31 Prenups can be for everyone - it's about setting expectations. 24:49 Protecting family wealth, trusts and inheritance 25:58 What is a petnup?26:25 Pets in divorce proceedings27:44 Are petnups legally binding? 29:08 A final hearing about a dog 29:54 Should prenups and postnups become legally binding? 30:34 The importance of safeguards and disclosure to protect vulnerable people Additional informationWhat is a prenup?  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=twKKM-kL5Uc A guide to prenups https://www.stowefamilylaw.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2022/08/Client-Guide-What-is-a-Prenup-Agreement.pdfFive reasons to get a prenup https://www.stowefamilylaw.co.uk/blog/2021/08/06/5-reasons-a-nuptial-agreement-may-be-right-for-you/ Join our list to get the latest from our lawyers, divorce coaches and relationship experts sent monthly to your inbox. Everything you need, in one

A staggering 95% of survivors of domestic abuse experience economic abuse, leaving them isolated, trapped, dependent and confused. So, we asked Tamsin Caine, a Chartered Financial Planner from Smart Divorce, to join us to look at how to recognise the signs of economic abuse and what you can do about it. A financial specialist in advising people going through a divorce or separation. Tamsin covers: What is economic abuse? What are the red flags of economic abuse What is the effect of the abuse on survivors? Reducing the stigma around economic abuse The support available for survivors The role of financial education and empowerment The importance of building a support team How to access support with limited financial resources How to take back control of finances And, a powerful message for survivors on how to rebuild your life following the abuse to create a financially stable and safe life. Support with economic abuseEconomic abuse rarely happens in isolation. It often occurs alongside other forms of domestic abuse. If you are in immediate danger, call the police on 999.You can access help and support from the 24-hour National Domestic Abuse Helpline on 0808 2000 247 or the Mankind Initiative support helpline: 01823 334 244 For support with economic abuse, please contact the charity Surviving Economic Abuse, at https://survivingeconomicabuse.org/ and Respect: Mens Advice Line: https://mensadviceline.org.uk/legal-information/economic-abuse-steps-to-economic-safety/Additional informationSurviving economic abuse - https://bit.ly/3v7uAA4 Divorcing or separating from a narcissist - https://bit.ly/3ROxpyQ Domestic abuse - how can a family lawyer help? https://youtu.be/bto4CXasGz0 Dealing with post-separation abuse - https://bit.ly/3veGwzR Taking control of your finances on separation - https://youtu.be/CIp6n4pgd9k Join our list to get the latest from our lawyers, divorce coaches and relationship experts sent monthly to your inbox. Everything you need, in one

Surrogacy is a wonderful way for people to build their family outside traditional norms, but it comes with legal complexities that often surprise people. In this episode, Matt & Liza were delighted to welcome Andrew Powell, one of the country's leading children's law barristers from 4PB, who specialises in surrogacy law, to explore how surrogacy works in the UK and internationally. An expert on surrogacy and the modern family, Andrew covers: What is surrogacy?What are the surrogacy laws in the UK?What is a parental order? And the role of parental responsibility?What causes the most issues with surrogacy? What to consider when looking at international surrogacy? What is the best way to prepare for surrogacy including the importance of research, planning and due diligence?And closes with the joy of building your family through surrogacy and the wonderful gift it can bring, and key takeaways for anyone considering surrogacy. You can access the full details of how to obtain parental responsibility in England & Wales following surrogacy here. Additional resources Creating your family through donor conception with The Donor Conception Network https://youtu.be/30A3rHm-Z4g Surrogacy in the UK with TwoDadsUK® https://youtu.be/8AJmaurSDzYWhat are the surrogacy laws in the UK - https://youtu.be/quENvsYUAU4 Further resources and guides on alternative parenting https://bit.ly/3uPkX9v 

 One in 6-7 men is a domestic abuse survivor*, but only half of male victims (49%) fail to tell anyone they are a victim. Stigma, fear, shame, misinformation and societal pressures all contribute to men suffering in silence and not reporting their perpetrator. In this episode, hosts Matt & Liza were joined by Tom Nash, aka Mr Divorce Coach, a specialist Divorce, Separation and Family Coach, to talk through the challenges faced by men struggling and trapped in abusive relationships. Using his expertise and insight from supporting male clients, Tom talks about the different types of abuse, red flags and signs to look for, and the far-reaching and life-changing impact.The conversation then turns to what holds men back from reporting abuse, and that men actually want to talk, they just need a safe and non-judgmental place to do so. Before exploring the different support available, and how to plan and create a safe exit strategy. If you are in immediate danger of domestic abuse, please call 999 and ask for the police, or alternatively you can access support at: Mankind Initiative support helpline: 01823 334 244 and Respect, mens advice line: 0808 801 0327.Or visit: mankind.org.uk and mensadviceline.org.uk/ Additional resources Supporting male victims of domestic abuse: https://youtu.be/mdZQzIDksRsDomestic abuse - how can a family lawyer help? https://youtu.be/bto4CXasGz0  How to get a non-molestation order: https://youtu.be/qxb6TTC3Ujw  Divorcing or separating from a narcissist: https://bit.ly/3ROxpyQ Dealing with post-separation abuse: https://bit.ly/3veGwzR Representing yourself in the family court:  https://bit.ly/472zXhdRebuilding your life after narcissistic abuse: https://youtu.be/Yv2pHLV43k4 

Divorce and separation can be difficult for any child, but supporting teenagers through it can bring a host of different issues. In this episode, Matt & Liza were joined by one of the UK's leading relationship and family coaches, Nichole Farrow, as she shared her advice on how to support teenagers, including the best way to tell them, how to avoid overexposing them to what is happening, the importance of putting in boundaries, and creating a safe space to enable them to share their views. She also discusses role-modelling the right behaviours, showing your emotions, helping them build positive support networks (and real people, not just online), and solid examples of how to meet them where they are to rebuild connection and trust. Additional resourcesSupporting children through divorce https://bit.ly/41vTaa3 Parenting alongside a narcissist - https://youtu.be/b10mkX4Y3og How to co-parent calmly and navigate the challenges of blended families - https://bit.ly/484giyD How mediation can help you separate - https://bit.ly/3MdX4y4 

Reaching a financial settlement in divorce requires people to gather a wealth of information and paperwork, so they have a clear picture of their finances and the evidence required to complete the 30-page plus daunting Form E.In this episode, hosts Matt & Liza offer practical advice to help people prepare, including where to start, what the process to reach a settlement is, the role of financial disclosure, how to complete the Form E, what information you need to gather, and what you can do if your ex won't provide the information.They also cover how to work out your future financial needs, the importance of thinking long-term, not just short-term, why you should make the agreement legally binding through a consent order, and then close with their top tips to help get you moving. Additional resources The dangers of a DIY divorce - https://bit.ly/3Tsvql7 Taking control of your finances on separation: https://youtu.be/CIp6n4pgd9k  Understanding pensions on divorce: https://bit.ly/41ryik4  Creating financial well-being https://youtu.be/SHADBMdHf4Y?si=xodKZkigxaAZvsgd How to prepare for a financial settlement: https://youtu.be/ixzT30CyMo0How to get a financial consent order:  https://youtu.be/-FlSjw4tTXM 

 In this episode, we welcomed Jodie Phelps, a leading Financial Planner, about the importance of, and how to achieve financial wellbeing following a divorce or separation.We begin our chat exploring what lies beneath financial well-being, the importance of understanding your relationship with money, managing your mindset, and identifying and learning to avoid your spending triggers.Jodie then turns to where to start when faced with managing your finances solo - don't bury your head in the sand, get everything out on the table, take it step by step and plan, plan and plan some more.Jam packed with practical tips, she goes on to share her advice on how to create a realistic budget you can stick to, how to become more financial savvy, and the top things you need to focus on to create financial well-being.You can download Jodie's budget planner here - https://bit.ly/3vCGaU0 Additional resources The dangers of a DIY divorce - https://bit.ly/3Tsvql7Taking control of your finances on separation: https://youtu.be/CIp6n4pgd9k  Understanding pensions on divorce: https://bit.ly/41ryik4  Creating financial well-being https://youtu.be/SHADBMdHf4Y?si=xodKZkigxaAZvsgd How to prepare for a financial settlement: https://youtu.be/ixzT30CyMo0  

In this episode, Matt & Liza were thrilled to be joined by award-winning comedian and creator of global hit podcast and book The Breakup Monologues, Rosie Wilby, to look at the unique challenges faced by the LGBTQIA+ community during a relationship breakdown. Rosie shares her passion for understanding the impact of heart break, before exploring monogamy, the history of relationships in the community, the various forms of cheating, how lesbians pioneered conscious uncoupling way before Gwyneth Paltrow, and how the gay community approaches the adversity caused by separating differently. She explores the expectation that marriage and relationships are considered the ultimate goal, especially for women, so it can considered a crashing failure when it falls apart. And that whilst tough, you can find joy in heartbreak, and embrace freedom and growth in the vibrant period afterwards.Rosie closes with the unique challenges that arise when separating in a smaller, tight-knit community, the pressure to remain on good terms, different reasons for separating, potential lack of family support, fighting over family pets, and the challenges that surrogacy and IVF may bring. Additional resources You can buy Rosie's book The Breakup Monologues: The Unexpected Joy of Heartbreak hereFinding the unexpected joy of heartbreak with Rosie Wilby  https://youtu.be/nmXO_2Rgv70 Where do I start? A beginner's guide to divorce: https://youtu.be/EhFpi8K9VZQCreating your family through donor conception: https://youtu.be/30A3rHm-Z4g Surrogacy in the UK withTwoDadsUK®: https://youtu.be/8AJmaurSDzY What are the surrogacy laws in the UK: https://youtu.be/quENvsYUAU4  

In this episode, hosts Matt & Liza explore the rising popularity of DIY divorces, how and when they work well, and the common dangers and pitfalls. They explain what a DIY divorce is, the current online process, and the difficulties that can arise from the implications of not completing the paperwork correctly in the beginning.They then turn to the numerous problems that can be caused by not getting legal advice on your finances, including inheritance and Wills, protecting yourself from future claims from your ex-spouse, and the dangers of ignoring any pensions, before looking at how to resolve issues around any children, and the importance of a parenting plan. To close, they explore people's options if they cannot afford a lawyer, how you can use a lawyer for certain elements of the process to save money, for example initial advice or help with a consent order application, the perils of low-cost online services offering ‘quickie divorces', and how mediation can help. Additional resources Where do I start? A beginner's guide to divorce: https://youtu.be/EhFpi8K9VZQDealing with pensions in divorce: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oz2h2QcU82MTaking control of your finances on separation - https://youtu.be/CIp6n4pgd9k Representing yourself in the family court: https://youtu.be/dZJnKIbZ2ok  How mediation can help you separate: https://youtu.be/c3S6BERlqpU 

In the second part of this episode, Dr Supriya McKenna, a highly experienced specialist narcissism expert, continues to share her advice and practical tools and techniques for people trying to parent alongside a narcissist.  (You can access the first part of this episode here.) We pick the conversation back up as she explores the role of parallel parenting and how to help children understand the narcissist behaviours and deal with the way they respond by validating their experience and emotions. She then continues with tips and advice on how to manage communication with the narcissist, how to keep any contact to a complete minimum, the importance of changing your response, and the power of the grey rock technique. She explains the power of learning how to build resilience and take back your power, so that you can raise the threshold of what triggers you, how to manage anxiety and fear by labelling and understanding your emotional responses, and using breath work, mediation and mindfulness to support you. And finally, she talks about the role of the family court, how it is rarely a salvation, but that detailed child arrangements orders for parenting plans can buy you a couple of years of reduced conflict. She closes with the final thoughts that this too shall pass, children grow up, the narcissist influence often fades and there is hope.Dr Supriya's previous podcastsDivorcing or separating from a narcissisthttps://open.spotify.com/episode/5MnW2zFD0baQXlJypdg4EA?si=7e889fac72534004 Rebuilding your life after narcissistic abusehttps://open.spotify.com/episode/1tma50Liy4cBGFTVwwcWnP?si=87295b59f67d4c53Additional resources Divorcing or separating from a narcissist - https://youtu.be/rCCfyHHKCfk Understanding toxic relationships - https://youtu.be/p0DFdr9PDEMRebuilding your life after narcissistic abuse: https://youtu.be/Yv2pHLV43k4 Domestic abuse: how can a family lawyer help? https://youtu.be/bto4CXasGz0 Representing yourself in the family court: https://youtu.be/dZJnKIbZ2ok

 In the first of this two-parter episode, Matt and Liza were delighted to be joined again by Dr Supriya McKenna, a highly experienced specialist narcissism expert, as she shares her advice and practical tools and techniques for people trying to parent alongside a narcissist. Building on our previous conversations (see links below to listen if you've not already), Dr Supriya starts by explaining what narcissistic personality disorder is, what drives them, and how this manifests in their behaviour, especially during divorce and parenting. She talks through how you can never co-parent with a narcissist, how they weaponise their children, and the range of emotional, financial and legal abuse you may experience, with specific examples ranging from false allegations to discredit you to withholding passports. She rounds off part one with tips and advice on what you can do, from role modelling and teaching empathy, to setting and encouraging boundaries, being consistent and providing a safe place, to creating a secure attachment with your children, and the power this gives you. We then continue the conversation in part two, looking at learning to manage the narcissist behaviour, how to best support your children, dealing with legal and financial abuse, the family court, and learning how to raise the threshold of what triggers you. Listen to part 2 here: https://open.spotify.com/episode/3Jgh41dZCrKiTKKmfoCpux?si=5c447e2b0ec34548Dr Supriya's previous podcastsDivorcing or separating from a narcissist https://open.spotify.com/episode/5MnW2zFD0baQXlJypdg4EA?si=7e889fac72534004 Rebuilding your life after narcissistic abusehttps://open.spotify.com/episode/1tma50Liy4cBGFTVwwcWnP?si=87295b59f67d4c53 Additional resources Divorcing or separating from a narcissist - https://youtu.be/rCCfyHHKCfk Understanding toxic relationships - https://youtu.be/p0DFdr9PDEMRebuilding your life after narcissistic abuse: https://youtu.be/Yv2pHLV43k4 Domestic abuse: how can a family lawyer help? https://youtu.be/bto4CXasGz0 Representing yourself in the family court: https://youtu.be/dJoin our list to get the latest from our lawyers, divorce coaches and relationship experts sent monthly to your inbox. Everything you need, in one

In this episode, hosts Matt & Liza explore the myth of common-law marriage and the reality of legal rights for cohabiting couples, who are now the fastest growing family type in the UK. They talk through the minimal legal rights of cohabiting couples compared to their married counterparts, and how to deal with issues around property and child maintenance, should a couple separate. They look at how cohabiting couples can protect themselves financially with a Declaration of Trust, a cohabitation agreement, and the importance of having a Will. Along with advice for unmarried people buying a property together, including the big difference between joint tenants and tenants in common.  Finally, they talk about whether cohabitation laws are still fit for purpose, and what would they change about them if they had a magic wand.  Join our list to get the latest from our lawyers, divorce coaches and relationship experts sent monthly to your inbox. Everything you need, in one

In this episode, Matt & Liza look at the role a family lawyer can play to help survivors of domestic abuse, the injunction orders available, and the impact of domestic abuse on financial settlements and making arrangements for children in a divorce case.They walk through the role of the two injunction orders available: non-molestation and an occupation order, how to apply for them, how the applications are handled in the family court, and the powers they have. They also talk about how allegations of domestic abuse can impact a child arrangements case, and the minimal impact it has on financial settlements.  And discuss the limitation of using mediation in cases where there is domestic abuse and a power imbalance, and how the family court system can become another tool for perpetrators to abuse their survivor.  Join our list to get the latest from our lawyers, divorce coaches and relationship experts sent monthly to your inbox. Everything you need, in one

In this episode, Matt and Liza were delighted to welcome back Dr Supriya McKenna, a highly experienced specialist narcissism expert, as she shares her advice and practical tools and techniques for people rebuilding their lives after narcissistic abuse. Building on the conversation in our episode in Season 1 (see below to listen if you've not already), Supriya explores the impact of post-separation narcissistic abuse, how to parent with a narcissist (the only option is parallel parenting), building financial independence, and the importance of switching off that narcissistic supply, whatever the challenges.She discusses the importance of learning how to set boundaries and stick to them, exploring and labelling your emotions to help you understand them, how to identify your needs, wants, values and strengths again, often lost after years of narcissistic abuse. She looks at using meditation and mindfulness to help you become the master of your thoughts, not their slave, to raise your threshold for being triggered by your perpetrator, and the positive impact of recognising and honouring gratitude. She also covers how Brene Brown's BRAVING model can help you rebuild trust and faith in others following narcissistic abuse, a walk through different techniques available to help you manage any anxiety and/or depression, and the power of post traumatic growth, helping you heal and then thrive and move forward in life. As mentioned, this episode is best listened to after Dr Supriya's first podcast episode with us - Divorcing or separating from a narcissist. Available here: https://open.spotify.com/episode/5MnW2zFD0baQXlJypdg4EA?si=55c12d0e80244988  or watch the video here: https://youtu.be/rCCfyHHKCfk Join our list to get the latest from our lawyers, divorce coaches and relationship experts sent monthly to your inbox. Everything you need, in one

In this episode, hosts Matt & Liza talk to dating coach and matchmaker Laura Buckley from Secret Alchemy to explore all things dating after divorce.Laura talks about how to get into the mindset of dating again, the red flags to look out for (love bombing being key), the importance of knowing your boundaries and what you want, not just what you don't want. Laura also shares her top tips on dating apps, how to make your profile stand out, including ensuring your photos are upfront, clear, recent and decent (definitely no animals), how to manage that first date, and some encouragement for all those terrified about dating again in a very different world.  Join our list to get the latest from our lawyers, divorce coaches and relationship experts sent monthly to your inbox. Everything you need, in one

In this episode, hosts Matt & Liza talk to Sushma Kotecha from Holistic Family Mediation & Coaching to look at how mediation can help couples work together to have a more dignified and amicable separation. Sushma talks about what mediation is, how it works, the process, what a MIAM is, and how it helps separating couples work through their issues, explore their options and make informed decisions about their future. Sushma also explains how mediation is not suitable for all couples, the red flags she looks for, and what you can do if one person is resistant to trying it. Sushma also explains her holistic approach to mediation, working with client's mind, body, spirit and soul to help them change the narrative of their separation - leaving the past behind and focusing on building a positive future for them and their family.  Please note, after recording this session, the Separated Parents Information Programme' (SPIPs) was replaced by the Planning Together for Children.  This new programme is only offered to parents within the court system via CAFCASS, and is not available to purchase for separated parents on a private paying basis. Join our list to get the latest from our lawyers, divorce coaches and relationship experts sent monthly to your inbox. Everything you need, in one

In this episode, hosts Matt & Liza talk to Certified Money Coach, Fanny Snaith, on how to best manage the drop from two salaries to one following a separation during a cost of living crisis. Fanny talks about the emotional responses we all have to money, the 8 different money types, and how understanding your relationship with money can help you uncover the reasons behind your spending and saving behaviours. She discusses the first steps to take to help you manage your finances if your relationship breaks down, and what to focus on once you are budgeting solo, post separation. Fanny also takes us on a money adventure (Indiana Jones style) and looks at how to create a money map and make every pound matter in these challenging times. Links to content mentioned in the podcast: You can take the money type quiz at https://fannysnaith.com You can watch Fanny share a wealth of practical tips on how to save and invest, and useful, practical advice on issues including insurance, utilities and mortgages at   https://youtu.be/lJr6oxR8Jr4 Join our list to get the latest from our lawyers, divorce coaches and relationship experts sent monthly to your inbox. Everything you need, in one

In this episode, hosts Matt & Liza talk to Sue Atkins, a leading Parenting Expert, author of Divorce Journal for Kids, and Broadcaster, to look at how to best support children through all the changes that divorce brings. Sue talks about the best way to tell children you are separating, whatever their age, the importance of listening and communication, and the power of the narrative you tell and the language you use. She discusses how parents can work together, the importance of planning and creating a parenting plan, how to manage special occasions such as Christmas and birthdays, and build new traditions. To close, she shares her advice on how to support children emotionally, build connections, put in boundaries, and keep things clear and consistent to give them the structure and routine they need.  Join our list to get the latest from our lawyers, divorce coaches and relationship experts sent monthly to your inbox. Everything you need, in one

In this episode, hosts Matt & Liza are joined by Emma Pickering, Senior Operations Manager at Refuge, as they look at technology assisted abuse, what it is, how to spot and how you stop it. Emma explains what technology assisted abuse is, the signs, and the various tools used by perpetrators, including everyday devices such as ring doorbells, mobile phones, home hubs, along with stalkerware, listening and tracking devices.She also talks about the connection with other forms of abuse, the rise in deep fake technology, and sharing intimate images, along with the impact felt by survivors who find themselves isolated, scared and confused. The episode also looks at the limitations of the family court, and how a lack of response to stalking and harassment online is leaving vulnerable survivors at even greater risk. If you are at any immediate risk of domestic abuse, please call the police. You can also access help and support from the 24-hour National Domestic Abuse Helpline on 0808 2000 247You can find out more about the work Refuge does to support survivors of tech abuse at www.refugetechsafety.org  Join our list to get the latest from our lawyers, divorce coaches and relationship experts sent monthly to your inbox. Everything you need, in one

In this episode, hosts Matt & Liza share their advice on where to start if you are thinking of ending your relationship, it has ended, or your partner has told you they want a divorce. A beginner's guide to divorce, they explain the importance of getting legal advice early, the divorce process (step-by-step), the pitfalls of kitchen table settlements, how finances are usually divided, and arrangements for children made. They also look at how to deal with the emotional challenges divorce brings, and dispel some of the most common divorce myths. Join our list to get the latest from our lawyers, divorce coaches and relationship experts sent monthly to your inbox. Everything you need, in one

In the second part of our series on the family court, hosts Matt & Liza offer their advice for anyone facing the family court without legal representation (litigant in person). They explain how family court processes work, tips on how to prepare, the names of each judge and protocols for each stage, what to expect from each hearing, and the expected outcomes from each stage. They also look at the importance of dealing with proceedings factually, not emotionally; top tips on how to deal with the court process and useful resources for further support. Please note that since recording, some of the terminology for addressing a judge has changed. Visit https://www.judiciary.uk/guidance-and-resources/what-do-i-call-a-judge/  for up-to-date guidance. Join our list to get the latest from our lawyers, divorce coaches and relationship experts sent monthly to your inbox. Everything you need, in one

In the first of a two part series, Matt and Liza share their experiences of the family court system and how it can be a useful process for people in certain circumstances who cannot reach an agreement otherwise. They also discuss the limitations of the system, funding issues, court delays, top tips for dealing with court, when it does, and when it doesn't work, and what needs to be changed. They also talk about the value of divorce coaches, the importance of a holistic approach, and how the court system still fails survivors of domestic abuse. Join our list to get the latest from our lawyers, divorce coaches and relationship experts sent monthly to your inbox. Everything you need, in one

In this episode, Matt and Liza are joined by Caron Kipping, an independent domestic abuse advocate and divorce coach specialising in domestic abuse recovery, to look at how to deal with post-separation abuse.  Caron explains what post-separation abuse is, the impact it has on people, building the right support team, the power of reframing, and how to focus on what you can control and let go of what you can't. Caron also talks about financial abuse, how you cannot co-parent with an abusive ex-partner, the use of parallel parenting, and how you can move forward in life and build a positive future, free of abuse and control. Join our list to get the latest from our lawyers, divorce coaches and relationship experts sent monthly to your inbox. Everything you need, in one

In this episode, Matt and Liza are joined by divorce coach, NLP Master Practitioner and author of Break up: from Crisis to Confidence, Claire Macklin (nee Black) as they look at how to handle fear and uncertainty through your relationship breakdown and beyond. Claire shares her experience of divorce, and tips and tools to help you cope with the overwhelming emotions separation can bring, including healthy coping strategies, breathing exercises, discrepancy engagement, focusing on what you can control, and small ways to create more certainty. They also talk about helping children deal with fear and uncertainty, the importance of building a team to support you, and how family lawyers can help clients more. Join our list to get the latest from our lawyers, divorce coaches and relationship experts sent monthly to your inbox. Everything you need, in one

In this festive themed episode, Matt and Liza look at the options available for separated couples struggling to sort out arrangements for Christmas. In what can be a tricky time of year for separated couples, they share their advice on the importance of communication and the use of tools such as child-focused mediation, arbitration, and in some cases the family court for those couples who cannot decide between them. They also talk about the wider use of a Specific Issue Order to help couples resolve issues including school and holidays, and how the family court is likely to view these applications.   Join our list to get the latest from our lawyers, divorce coaches and relationship experts sent monthly to your inbox. Everything you need, in one

In this episode, Matt and Liza are joined by Divorce Coach and Founder of Divorce Goddess Coaching, Tosh Brittan, as they talk about loneliness and how to overcome it following a relationship breakdown.Tosh explains how loneliness can easily sneak up on people, the difference between married lonely and divorce lonely, how embracing loneliness can help remove the fear and uncomfortableness of it, and practical advice on dealing with it, especially when you have time away from your children.Tosh also shares her ethos of showing kindness in divorce to each other and yourself, and tips on how to deal with a challenging ex-partner. Join our list to get the latest from our lawyers, divorce coaches and relationship experts sent monthly to your inbox. Everything you need, in one

In this episode of Stowe talks, Matt and Liza are joined by specialist divorce financial planner Ceri Griffiths of Willowbrook Lifestyle Planning, as they look at the importance of pensions and how to deal with them in a divorce settlement. Ceri shares her knowledge of the different types of pensions, how to value a pension, the role of an actuary report, issues around offsetting a pension against the family home, and the options available for pension sharing.She also shares the importance of getting financial advice as early as possible, and taking a long-term view of your finances to cover both your immediate and long-term needs. Join our list to get the latest from our lawyers, divorce coaches and relationship experts sent monthly to your inbox. Everything you need, in one

In this episode, Matt and Liza are joined by Rosie Lyon, an Executive Assistant and divorce coach, public speaker and campaigner for survivors of economic and domestic abuse.Rosie shares her personal story of being in an abusive relationship that led to the repossession of her home through no-fault of her own, and how this has impacted her life and financial position. Rosie explains what economic abuse is, how to spot the red flags, how family and friends can help, the support available, particularly in the banking system, and how people can safeguard themselves in the future. She also discusses the work she now does to raise awareness and implement changes, including training and policy implementation in the banking system, so that survivors can move forward in life.  Join our list to get the latest from our lawyers, divorce coaches and relationship experts sent monthly to your inbox. Everything you need, in one

 In this episode, Matt and Liza are joined by Dr Supriya McKenna, a highly experienced Specialist Narcissism expert, as she shares her deep understanding of narcissism, along with tools and techniques for people undergoing a divorce or separation from narcissistic individuals. Supriya discusses the traits of a narcissist, how to identify them, how to best manage your response to their behaviours, and why divorcing from them requires a very different approach. Her advice will help you take back control of the separation process, helping prevent costs spiralling out of control, and protect your mental health and well-being during the divorce and beyond. Sign-up to our mailing list and we'll keep you up-to-date with the latest from Stowe talks, including our podcast, video series and live webinars. This podcast is brought to you by the Stowe talks team at Stowe Family LawJoin our list to get the latest from our lawyers, divorce coaches and relationship experts sent monthly to your inbox. Everything you need, in one