Fertility Cafe

As the first episode of the season, we dive into a high-level discussion of this season's theme, including: The issues surrogates face The issues egg donors face Things IPs need to keep in mind to have a good relationship with their egg donors and surrogates In the episode, host Eloise Drane discusses the emotional burden, physical ramifications, and an overview of the commonly overlooked issues donors and surrogates need to be aware of. Host Bio I'm Eloise Drane, Founder of Family Inceptions, the first surrogacy and egg donation agency in the state of Georgia and the first Black-owned surrogacy and egg donation agency in the United States. While I started Family Inceptions back in 2008, my love for giving people the gift of life goes back even further. In 1998, I donated a kidney. The experience was life-changing for me and I felt called to help more people in such a meaningful, profound way. Two years later, I had my first experience with egg donation. Little did I know that the egg donation journey would completely change the trajectory of my life. To date, I've been a gestational carrier (also known as a surrogate) three times and an egg donor six times. Along the way, I became an expert in the process. I founded Family Inceptions to help more intended parents start their families, to support other surrogates and egg donors, and to make an impact in the world. Although I love working with families through Family Inceptions, I also understand that many people are priced out of working with agencies. So I took everything I learned from donating eggs six times, serving as a surrogate three times, earning an MBA, and running the first Black-owned surrogacy and egg donation agency of its kind in the US... and put it all into an easy-to-use, comprehensive course to help intended parents successfully navigate their independent surrogacy journey. I call that course Surrogacy Roadmap. There are so many wonderful people out there who are longing to become parents, but they can't physically create or carry a child for one reason or another. Likewise, there are many women out there who are either considering helping intended parents achieve their family goals or who are already involved in the fertility industry as egg donors or surrogates.  I created the Fertility Cafe podcast as a free resource to answer the biggest questions intended parents, egg donors, and surrogates are facing as they consider third-party reproduction. Resources Eloise Drane on LinkedIn Eloise Drane on Instagram Eloise Drane on Facebook Learn more about our podcast: Fertility Cafe Learn more about our surrogacy and egg donation agency: Family Inceptions Learn more about independent surrogacy: Surrogacy Roadmap On the blog: Five Considerations To Keep In Mind When Choosing An Egg Donor On the blog: Your Pregnant Belly As A Surrogate: What To Expect Rate, Review, and Subscribe! We would be so grateful if you took the time to rate and review our podcast on iTunes! And of course, don't forget to hit that Subscribe button to have new episodes delivered straight to your feed! Podcast Review ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️: “Beautiful and heartfelt conversations around family building. Can't wait to hear more!”

Ep.  60 | Carrot Fertility: Employer Provider Benefits with Brooke Bartholomay Quinn   Episode Summary  In this episode of Fertility Café, Eloise gets to talk with Brooke Quinn of Carrot Fertility about the inclusion of employee benefits that offer fertility care and family building support such as adoption and surrogacy. It's important for both employers and employees to understand the advantages and costs of including fertility care and benefits packages. We want to encourage employees to ask about their fertility care eligibility and want to encourage employers to include this needed service into their benefits packages. As fertility care is ever-evolving, this is an important topic that we are going to talk about in depth today.   BIO Brooke Quinn is Chief Customer Officer at Carrot Fertility, the leading global fertility benefits provider for employers and health plans.  Carrot is built to support employees through their lifelong fertility healthcare journey. Companies use Carrot to customize a fertility benefit that provides employees financial, medical, and emotional support as they pursue parenthood, reducing healthcare costs and resulting in better clinical outcomes. Carrot's clinically-managed program includes fertility preservation like egg and sperm freezing, IVF, donor and gestational carrier services, adoption, and pregnancy support. Family Inceptions is newly partnered with Carrot. In this episode, Eloise and Brooke talk about:  Why family building benefits have taken so long to be added to some benefits and still aren't standard in every workplace How a lot of the current fertility benefits offered aren't fully inclusive Why it's so important for employers to offer family-building benefits How employees can start the conversation with their employer about adding these benefits Resources   Brooke on LinkedIn Brooke on Twitter Carrot Fertility on Instagram Carrot Fertility's Podcast: BabySteps A History of Employer-Sponsored Healthcare: https://www.griffinbenefits.com/blog/history-of-employer-sponsored-healthcare Learn more about our podcast: Fertility Cafe Learn more about our surrogacy and egg donation agency: Family Inceptions Learn more about independent surrogacy: Surrogacy Roadmap On the blog: Us Surrogacy Map On the blog: A Beginner's Guide to Fertility Acronyms On the podcast: Ep 35 | Infertility Epidemic     Rate, Review, and Subscribe!  We would be honored if you took the time to rate and review our podcast on iTunes! And of course, don't forget to hit that Subscribe button to have new episodes delivered straight to your feed!   Podcast Review ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️:  “Beautiful and heartfelt conversations around family building. Can't wait to hear more!”

Ep. 59 | Advocacy Groups: Highlighting Important Organizations   There are so many charitable organizations out there, it can be hard to know which ones to turn to in times of need, or in times of abundance when you are looking to share your generosity. On today's episode, Eloise highlights 12 non-profit organizations that are changing lives in the infertility, reproductive health, and trying-to-conceive community. From large-scale national organizations to more localized support groups and specialized advocacy groups, Eloise has firsthand knowledge and experience working with founders, members, beneficiaries, and other participants of each highlighted organization.   Learn about the important work being done by: Fertility Within Reach, a national advocacy and education organization dedicated to making fertility treatments and care more accessible and affordable The Tinina Q. Cade Foundation, a nonprofit that has helped more than 120 families with financial assistance for IVF, fertility care, adoption, and surrogacy expenses Support and advocacy groups specifically for Black woman and women of color facing infertility and/or reproductive health challenges. Highlighted organizations include the Broken Brown Egg, Endo Black, and Fertility for Colored Girls Groups like the Black Women's Health Imperative and Black Mamas Matter Alliance who are leading the charge for equity in reproductive healthcare and effecting change at a legislative level Organizations for the LGBTQ+ community such as Family Equality Condition-specific support groups for women who suffer from uterine fibroids, PCOS, and endometriosis Organizations such as Sisters in Loss and Daughters of Hannah that help women, particularly women of color, cope with and heal from pregnancy and infant loss Resources Links to the organizations highlighted on todays episode: Fertility Within Reach: https://www.fertilitywithinreach.org/ Tinina Q. Cade Foundation: https://cadefoundation.org/ EM*Power Donation: https://empowerdonation.com The Broken Brown Egg: https://thebrokenbrownegg.org/ The White Dress Project: https://www.thewhitedressproject.org/ PCOS Challenge: https://www.pcoschallenge.org/ Endo Black: https://www.endoblack.org/ Black Women's Health Initiative: https://bwhi.org/ Fertility for Colored Girls: https://www.fertilityforcoloredgirls.org/ Black Mamas Matter Alliance: https://blackmamasmatter.org/ Family Equality: https://www.familyequality.org Sisters in Loss Foundation: https://sistersinloss.com/ Our Miracle Child: https://ourmiraclechild.com/ Daughters of Hannah: https://www.facebook.com/daughtersofhannah/   Learn more about our podcast: Fertility Cafe Learn more about our surrogacy and egg donation agency: Family Inceptions   Rate, Review, and Subscribe! We would be honored if you took the time to rate and review our podcast! And of course, don't forget to hit that Subscribe button to have new episodes delivered straight to your feed!    

Episode Summary  On this episode of Fertility Café, Eloise gets to talk to Anna Flores Locke about her experience with embryo donation and her journey of infertility as a Latina woman. Anna struggled for years with infertility in isolation and heartbreak, not knowing where to turn. Since her experience, thankfully, many changes have been made to provide women with counseling and support to assist them in the process of fertility treatment and embryo donation in particular.  We hope this conversation provides education, emotional support, and a sense of community for the women who are walking in her shoes and are feeling alone on their fertility journey.   In this episode, Eloise and Anna talk about:  What it was like to experience infertility as a Latina woman and how her community responded to her story The grieving process that can happen during embryo donation Why proper education and counseling is so crucial to those going through an infertility journey The biggest takeaway Anna wants others who are experiencing infertility to know Resources Anna on Facebook Anna on Instagram Anna's book Body Betrayal: Understanding and Living with Infertility is available on her website and on Amazon. https://www.charlandra.com/shop Learn more about our podcast: Fertility Cafe Learn more about our surrogacy and egg donation agency: Family Inceptions Learn more about independent surrogacy: Surrogacy Roadmap On the blog: Us Surrogacy Map On the blog: A Beginner's Guide to Fertility Acronyms    Rate, Review, and Subscribe!  We would be honored if you took the time to rate and review our podcast on iTunes! And of course, don't forget to hit that Subscribe button to have new episodes delivered straight to your feed!   Podcast Review ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️:  “Beautiful and heartfelt conversations around family building. Can't wait to hear more!”

Ep. 57| Unique Populations of Intended Parents   Families come in all shapes and sizes these days. The notion of a “traditional” family makeup with a mom, dad, and 2.2 children is becoming the exception rather than the rule. In today's episode, host Eloise Drane takes a look at what it takes to navigate fertility when you don't quite fit the mold of what society thinks a traditional family should look like. How can third-party reproduction help single intended parents? LGBTQ+ intended parents? Intended parents who are of an advanced age, 50 or older? HIV+ people who wish to become parents? Viable pathways exist for each of these unique populations, and today we'll talk about the ins and outs of each.  Eloise covers topics such as:  Why more and more people are choosing single parenthood, and how donor eggs and sperm + third-party reproduction makes it possible Fertility and health insurance coverage discrimination - how the current system is stacked against single and LGTBQ+ people What to expect as an LGBTQ+ intended parent - from donor selection to surrogacy and beyond What fertility looks like for an intended parent age 50 or older - the biases and challenges they may encounter and how to overcome The unique challenges faced by intended parents living with HIV - a look into the incredible medical advances that exist today, allowing safe and healthy fertility journeys to occur Resources Learn more about our podcast: Fertility Cafe Learn more about our surrogacy and egg donation agency: Family Inceptions On the blog: Reciprocal IVF: Creating Families For LGBTQ Couples  On the blog: Egg Donors & Surrogates For LGBTQ Couples | Family Inceptions  Financial Resources: Fertility and Family Building Grants and Financial Assistance Programs  Advocacy Resources:  Men Having Babies Family Equality Gays With Kids Single Mothers by Choice Solo Parent Society RESOLVE   Rate, Review, and Subscribe!  We would be honored if you took the time to rate and review our podcast! And of course, don't forget to hit that Subscribe button to have new episodes delivered straight to your feed!   Podcast Review ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ “Beautiful and heartfelt conversations around family building. Can't wait to hear more!”

Ep. 54 | Disparities in Fertility Care for Minority Populations with Dr. Tia Jackson-Bey   Episode Summary  In this episode of Fertility Café, Eloise gets to talk with Dr. Tia Jackson-Bey to discuss disparities in fertility care in minority populations.  There are particular barriers to caring for and noticeably poor treatment outcomes for black and brown women. We're highlighting health disparities that prevent family building through fertility, diagnostics, gynecological surgery, fertility preservation, egg, sperm, and embryo freezing, and infertility treatments like Intrauterine Insemination (IUI) and In Vitro Fertilization (IVF) for minorities. They'll be discussing the importance of reproductive justice and increasing access to fertility care for all.   Guest Bio Dr. Tia Jackson-Bey is a reproductive endocrinologist and infertility specialist and board-certified obstetrician-gynecologist who cares for patients at RMA of New York's Brooklyn office. Her professional interests include physician-patient education, IVF outcome improvement, global public health, and mentoring unrepresented college and medical students on careers in medicine.  Dr. Jackson-Bey is passionate about reproductive justice and increasing access to fertility care for all. She was recently appointed a member of the newly formed ASRM Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion Task Force which will enhance opportunities and reproductive medicine for underrepresented minority populations and reduce health disparities in access to care. She is a talented surgeon and dedicated fertility expert who was focused on fertility preservation, IVF success, and great outcomes for her patients.   In this episode, Eloise and Tia talk about:  The biggest barriers that certain communities face in regards to fertility care The importance of getting help and asking questions even early in your fertility journey How the US deals with health disparities compared to other countries Being able to find the right providers who will help you reach your goals Resources Follow Tia on Instagram Learn more about our podcast: Fertility Cafe Learn more about our surrogacy and egg donation agency: Family Inceptions Learn more about independent surrogacy: Surrogacy Roadmap On the blog: Us Surrogacy Map On the blog: A Beginner's Guide to Fertility Acronyms On the podcast: Ep 35 | Infertility Epidemic

Ep.  53 | Aftermath of Infertility (PTSD)   Episode Summary  In this episode of Fertility Café, Eloise focuses on infertility, pregnancy loss, and mental health issues like PTSD, anxiety, and postpartum depression. If you feel that any of these topics would contribute to negative feelings or upset, go ahead and skip this one. I know it's a heavy topic right around the holidays, but I also feel strongly that through education and open discussion about these difficult topics, we can help provide comfort and support to those who need it.   In this episode, Eloise talks about:  The phenomenon of “decision fatigue” and how it applies to the fertility journey How educating ourselves can help improve empathy towards others Why grieving is so common throughout a fertility journey The importance of destigmatizing being able to ask for help when you need it    Resources Learn more about our podcast: Fertility Cafe Learn more about our surrogacy and egg donation agency: Family Inceptions Learn more about independent surrogacy: Surrogacy Roadmap On the blog: Us Surrogacy Map On the blog: A Beginner's Guide to Fertility Acronyms On the podcast: Ep 35 | Infertility Epidemic    Rate, Review, and Subscribe!  We would be honored if you took the time to rate and review our podcast on iTunes! And of course, don't forget to hit that Subscribe button to have new episodes delivered straight to your feed!   Podcast Review ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️:  “Beautiful and heartfelt conversations around family building. Can't wait to hear more!”

Ep.  52 | Fertility Journeys for Women with Demanding Careers with Dr. Hala Sabry  Episode Summary  In this episode of Fertility Café, we get to talk about a topic with a very special guest: fertility journeys for women with demanding careers. Every fertility journey is a process of getting to know ourselves. A process where new fears, doubts, and unknowns pop up that we didn't know we had until now. The stress of wanting to grow a family while maintaining a career can add to the difficulty. That desire to build our family is there no matter our job, our gender identity, our economic status, or our fertility status. Our guest today has shared her IVF journey with the world in the hopes that others will see it as normal and know that they are not alone in this. Eloise talks with Hala Sabry who reminds us of that and to help us navigate the process as well as life, career, caring for small children during what is likely the most emotional time in our life.    Guest Bio Dr. Hala Sabry is a Board-Certified Emergency Medicine physician, the founder of Physician Moms Group (PMG), IVF patient and a super mom of five—with two sets of twins! Being a mother of five has given Hala a unique expertise and skill set to help other parents in the medical field. After years of infertility, she found that balancing motherhood and a career in medicine was challenging. She frequently fought through fear, negative self-talk, and a recurring desire to quit her job in medicine, and she knew other mothers and physicians must have experienced the same struggles. She attributes having a solid support system (PMG) and life coaching in helping her manage her thoughts and reaffirm her “why.”   In this episode, Eloise and Hala talk about:  What it was like to secretly go through multiple rounds of IVF while balancing a demanding career Bosses, coworkers and patients passing judgement through her pregnancies Why we can't take it personally when certain relationships end while we're on this journey The importance of understanding and building a lasting legacy for yourself   Resources Learn more about Hala on her site: halasabry.com Learn more about our podcast: Fertility Cafe Learn more about our surrogacy and egg donation agency: Family Inceptions Learn more about independent surrogacy: Surrogacy Roadmap On the blog: Us Surrogacy Map On the blog: A Beginner's Guide to Fertility Acronyms On the podcast: Ep 35 | Infertility Epidemic    Rate, Review, and Subscribe!  We would be honored if you took the time to rate and review our podcast on iTunes! And of course, don't forget to hit that Subscribe button to have new episodes delivered straight to your feed! Podcast Review ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️:  “Beautiful and heartfelt conversations around family building. Can't wait to hear more!”

Ep. 50 | Fertility Insurance with Jason Smith   Episode Summary  In this episode of Fertility Café, Eloise gets to talk with Jason Smith, the Founder and President of International Fertility Insurance. He and his team now provide hopeful parents, as well as agencies, with the solutions required—with unparalleled service. We dive into what surrogates and intended parents should look out for with insurance plans, and how to ensure adequate coverage throughout the entire pregnancy. Jason Smith is the Founder and President of International Fertility Insurance (IFI), a leading provider of insurance and services to cover surrogacy and egg donation. Jason is a frequent speaker to the surrogacy industry on the insurance options for a surrogacy journey. Jason's passion for insurance for third-party reproduction and surrogacy started with his own personal struggle with fertility. Jason experienced firsthand fertility treatment, early labor, medically ordered bed rest, and the NICU. Prior to launching IFI, Jason had been providing insurance and financial solutions since 2008, matching insurance to the surrogacy journey since 2014. Jason's top focal points are high-touch customer service and providing an abundance of education for Intended Parents, Agencies, Attorneys, and Fertility Clinics. In this episode, Eloise and Jason talk about:  Understanding insurance plans and policies for surrogates What people should look out for with different plans and policies What a lot of international people don't understand about how insurance policies work in America The pros & cons of different insurance plans and how to make sure you're always protected   Resources Learn more about Jason Smith on his site International Fertility Insurance Connect with Jason on LinkedIn Learn more about our podcast: Fertility Cafe Learn more about our surrogacy and egg donation agency: Family Inceptions Learn more about independent surrogacy: Surrogacy Roadmap On the blog: Us Surrogacy Map On the blog: A Beginner's Guide to Fertility Acronyms On the podcast: Ep 35 | Infertility Epidemic   Rate, Review, and Subscribe!  We would be honored if you took the time to rate and review our podcast on iTunes! And of course, don't forget to hit that Subscribe button to have new episodes delivered straight to your feed!   Podcast Review ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️:  “Beautiful and heartfelt conversations around family building. Can't wait to hear more!”

Ep.  49 | Social Surrogacy   Episode Summary  Today we're going to dive into the nitty-gritty of the topic: what is social surrogacy? Who could this be right for? If anyone. And what are the real ethical concerns about the topic?   On this episode of Fertility Café, Eloise talks about a subject that she's never really spoken about, social surrogacy. Gestational surrogacy is an amazing opportunity for intended parents who are otherwise unable to have a baby of their own. It's a form of third-party reproduction that has become increasingly accepted in the public eye and more accessible than ever before. The leaps and bounds made in the field of third-party reproduction these past couple of decades are incredible. IVF and gestational surrogacy have made parenthood possible for people in ways that used to be unthinkable. And so, of course, it makes sense for there to be a lot of ethical questions and dilemmas to pop up. This question of using surrogacy by choice is an important discussion to have. It helps us define the blurry line and science and reproductive technology between doing good and taking it too far.   In this episode, Eloise talks about:  Why some women might pursue social surrogacy. Is social surrogacy ethical? How social surrogacy impacts society's view of third-party reproduction. Eloise's view on social surrogacy as an agency owner and past surrogate. Resources Census data for surrogacy, adoption and desire to have a biological child: YouGov  Learn more about our podcast: Fertility Café Learn more about our surrogacy and egg donation agency: Family Inceptions Learn more about independent surrogacy: Surrogacy Roadmap On the blog: Us Surrogacy Map On the blog: A Beginner's Guide to Fertility Acronyms Episode 23: Ep 23 | Sensational Surrogacy | The Fertility Cafe   Rate, Review, and Subscribe!  We would be honored if you took the time to rate and review our podcast on iTunes! And of course, don't forget to hit that Subscribe button to have new episodes delivered straight to your feed!   Podcast Review ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️:  “Beautiful and heartfelt conversations around family building. Can't wait to hear more!”

Ep.  48 | Kellee Stewart   Episode Summary    In this episode of Fertility Café, Eloise gets to talk with Kellee Stewart about proactive fertility, egg freezing, and the importance of checking your fertility status. Kellee will also be discussing the unknowns and the remaining challenges to a fully claimed proactive family-building experience. With the advent of egg freezing and more widely available modern fertility testing, women may now take a more proactive approach to their fertility.   Kellee Stewart is a writer, producer, and actress last seen in Ava Duvernay's Cherish the Day and just wrapped her recurring roles in CW's hit show All American and Netflix's On My Block. Kellee wrote and sold her screenplay 29 Eggs, based on her personal fertility journey, to a major television network. The project is currently in the last stages of development, and though COVID paused its production, it did not stop Kellée from hitting the podcast and hosting rounds as a self-proclaimed “egg advocate” where she continues to promote proactive fertility health and knowledge. Kellee is the creator and host of Warrior Wednesdays IG Live fertility talk show along with other fertility projects coming to your tv soon.    In this episode, Eloise and Kellee talk about:  The importance of proactive fertility and planning ahead. What to look out for and the types of questions you should be asking. How to be aware of your fertility status regardless of where you are in life. Why we have a responsibility to educate ourselves and future generations. Resources Learn more about Kellee Stewart on her site: Warrior Wednesdays Learn more about our podcast: Fertility Cafe Learn more about our surrogacy and egg donation agency: Family Inceptions Learn more about independent surrogacy: Surrogacy Roadmap On the blog: Us Surrogacy Map On the blog: A Beginner's Guide to Fertility Acronyms On the podcast: Ep 35 | Infertility Epidemic    Rate, Review, and Subscribe!  We would be honored if you took the time to rate and review our podcast on iTunes! And of course, don't forget to hit that Subscribe button to have new episodes delivered straight to your feed!   Podcast Review ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️:  “Beautiful and heartfelt conversations around family building. Can't wait to hear more!”

Ep. 47 | Paying for Fertility Care Episode Summary  Join host Eloise Drane for an honest look at the financial side of fertility. It's not always easy having a baby. Millions of people struggle with their fertility for a variety of reasons, and while technology and medicine have advanced to make parenthood possible for nearly anyone, it still remains inaccessible to a lot of intended parents because of the cost. Fertility care and third-party reproduction can be very costly, but there are ways to make it more affordable. Eloise will shed some light on important issues including:    How much fertility care & third-party reproduction really costs, from medication to complex medical procedures  Factors that can increase or decrease the cost of IVF The types of expenses you can expect with surrogacy How to find out what, if anything, your health insurance will cover How optional fertility insurance works, and why it's an important benefit more employers should offer Tips for lowering the cost of fertility care without using insurance Options for financing, including fertility-specific loans and personal lines of credit Creative fundraising ideas to boost your fertility savings   Resources Great Fertility Education Resources: FertilityIQ Resolve.org resources: Making Infertility Affordable - RESOLVE  Find Useful Infertility Treatment Grants and Scholarships  Learn more about our podcast: Fertility Cafe Learn more about our surrogacy and egg donation agency: Family Inceptions On the blog: A CPA's Advice on Taxes, Escrow, and Funding - What Every Intended Parent Needs to Know  On the blog: Fertility and Family Building Grants & Financial Assistance Programs On the blog: 4 Best Alternatives for IVFR Financing with Bad Credit On the podcast: Ep. 42 | State Advocacy with Mollie Walker & Chelsea Caldwell - The Fertility Cafe  Rate, Review, and Subscribe!  We would be honored if you took the time to rate and review our podcast! And of course, don't forget to hit that Subscribe button to have new episodes delivered straight to your feed!   Podcast Review ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️:  “Beautiful and heartfelt conversations around family building. Can't wait to hear more!”

Ep. 46 | Military Family Building with Ellen Gustafson & Katy Bell Hendrickson   Episode Summary  Today on the Fertility Café podcast, Eloise gets to talk with Ellen Gustafson & Katy Bell Hendrickson about fertility for military families. They share their journey that led them to be activists for change to help military service members and their spouse receive the fertility services they need. Ellen Gustafson is a social entrepreneur, author, activist, and, most importantly, Mom and Military Spouse. She is the Co-Founder of FEED and the FEED Foundation, and the Co-Director of the Summit Institute since 2016. She is the Mom of three miracle toddlers and lives with them and her husband in “just seasonal enough” Virginia Beach, VA. Her personal experiences inspired her to find ways to support active-duty service members to build the families they want regardless of deployment schedules, fertility challenges, or financial situation.   Katy Bell Hendrickson is a Military Spouse to a retired career Naval Special Warfare officer and mother of five children. She and her husband have experience with adoption, assisted reproduction and third party reproduction. Katy was the Reserve Flag Spouse Advisor for the Command Spouse Leadership School at NLEC in Naval Station Newport, Flag Spouse Advisor for CORE San Diego, and an Advisor to Naval Services FamilyLine in Washington DC. Katy has been active in the Warrior and Family Support Group at Naval Amphibious Base Coronado as a Senior Peer Mentor and has led multiple workshops on Family Building covering the topics of ART and Adoption. Katy is currently on the Women's Committee for the National Museum of Women in the Arts and lives in Washington DC with her husband, youngest son, and twin daughters. Ellen and Katy are the co-Founders of the Military Family Building Coalition—an organization on a mission to help active military members build their families.  This episode, Eloise, Ellen and Katy share:  That 15 to 20% of surrogate babies nationwide are carried by military wives, even though the military makes up less than 1% of the US population TRICARE, US Military Health Care, does not cover many types of reproductive assistance or adoption for military families The unique fertility struggles that military families face Their personal stories that led them to co-found Military Family Building Coalition   Resources Learn more about Ellen & Katy's Military Family Building Coalition: Instagram, Facebook, Twitter and on their site Learn more about our podcast: Fertility Cafe Learn more about our surrogacy and egg donation agency: Family Inceptions Learn more about independent surrogacy: Surrogacy Roadmap On the blog: Us Surrogacy Map On the blog: A Beginner's Guide to Fertility Acronyms   Rate, Review, and Subscribe!  We would be honored if you took the time to rate and review our podcast on iTunes! And of course, don't forget to hit that Subscribe button to have new episodes delivered straight to your feed!  

Ep.  45 | When Third Party Reproduction Goes Wrong   In today's episode, host Eloise Drane tells several tales of third-party reproduction gone wrong. With over two decades of experience in the infertility industry, Eloise often feels like she's seen it all! And yet, every once in awhile stories come across her news feed that have the power to surprise her.  Eloise looks at a variety of situations, from clinic equipment malfunctions to questionable actions on the part of doctors and surrogates. She examines what went wrong in each situation, and most importantly, what we can learn from it to prevent these mishaps from occurring in the future.   Eloise covers questions and topics such as: Why ethical, standardized practices are so important in third-party reproduction, and what can happen when the media and vocal opponents of it get their hands on sensational news stories Current regulations (or lack thereof) on fertility clinics in the United States, and how that can lead to terrible equipment malfunctions and loss of embryos How to vet a fertility clinic, their staff, their lab, and their safety protocols so you can avoid potential disaster The bizarre tale of an IVF mix up over a decade ago, and how two couples became tangled in an unexpected blended family tree The strange yet shockingly not uncommon practice of doctors using their own sperm to help patients get pregnant - a look throughout history, from the 1880s to today How a surrogate became pregnant with two babies, each with different biological parents - her own, and the intended parents who contracted with her to be their surrogate The takeaway - weighing the risk of third party reproduction mishaps vs the outcome for potential parents Resources Learn more about our podcast: Fertility Cafe Learn more about our surrogacy and egg donation agency: Family Inceptions On the blog: Understanding the Basics of IVF On the podcast: Episode 23 - Sensational Surrogacy Find your unique path to parenthood: https://familyinceptions.com/parents/ Rate, Review, and Subscribe! We would be honored if you took the time to rate and review our podcast! And of course, don't forget to hit that Subscribe button to have new episodes delivered straight to your feed.

Episode Summary  On this episode of Fertility Cafe, Eloise gets to talk to Lori Metz who is a licensed Clinical Social Work/Therapist and certified case manager. She works with individuals, couples, and families and specializes in relationships and fertility.  She is the creator of  I Dreamed of You: The Story of an Egg Donor Baby a children's book about egg donation written for a young audience to introduce the essential conversation of honest and honored origins and has her own podcast, LOVE:

Episode Summary  On this episode of Fertility Cafe, Eloise dives into the topic of bodily autonomy in surrogacy and egg donation arrangements. Much of the opposition to surrogacy as a practice stems from a misunderstanding of what it means to be a surrogate today in America. Modern gestational surrogacy involves a mutually agreed-upon relationship with clear boundaries and complete respect and autonomy given to the surrogate mother. Eloise explores the nuances of bodily autonomy and offers her wisdom on how to navigate a potentially complicated but ultimately rewarding experience. This episode covers a variety of topics including:  Why the characterization of surrogate as offering up “wombs for rent” is inaccurate and offensive The extensive vetting, screening, and setting of expectations that occurs between a surrogate and intended parts prior to any agreement being signed What is a reasonable vs. non-reasonable request for IPs to make of a surrogate A surrogate's right to make medical decisions for herself at all times, in any circumstance Red flags for potential surrogates to watch out for The very complicated question of termination or selective reduction and how bodily autonomy plays a role How the COVID-19 vaccination has become the latest point of contention in the surrogate-IP matching process What potential egg donors need to know in order to advocate for themselves and make an informed decision   Resources Learn more about our podcast: Fertility Cafe Learn more about our surrogacy and egg donation agency: Family Inceptions How to apply to be a surrogate: Surrogate application process On the blog: Side Effects of Egg Donation, Understanding the Risks On the blog: Ten Things That Will Make You an Ideal Surrogate    Rate, Review, and Subscribe!  We would be honored if you took the time to rate and review our podcast! And of course, don't forget to hit that Subscribe button to have new episodes delivered straight to your feed!   Review quote:  “Beautiful and heartfelt conversations around family building. Can't wait to hear more!”

Episode Summary  Fertility care is ever-involving. For many, medical treatments are not covered by their insurance. Coverage for infertility and fertility preservation can currently be disallowed by insurance companies. Many insurance companies have fertility coverage classified as cosmetic or elective.   On this episode of Fertility Cafe, Eloise gets to talk to Mollie Walker and Chelsea Caldwell. Two ladies who took up the fertility-care torch as advocates to help change the fertility landscape.   This episode, Eloise and the guests talk about:  Taking on legislation and where to start  Reviewing through the timeline regarding creating Fertility Advocates For Tennessee, writing the Tennessee Pro-Family Building Act, bill and building awareness for the cause. Quick overview of what has to happen for a bill to be made into law and go into effect.  Challenges you may experience when you begin the process to change legislation without a lobbyist   Resources Learn more about our Guests Mollie Walker: Tennessee Fertility Advocates Learn more about our Guests Chelsea Caldwell: Chelsea Caldwell Learn more about our podcast: Fertility Cafe Learn more about our surrogacy and egg donation agency: Family Inceptions Learn more about independent surrogacy: Surrogacy Roadmap On the blog: Us Surrogacy Map On the blog: A Beginner's Guide to Fertility Acronyms   Rate, Review, and Subscribe!  We would be honored if you took the time to rate and review our podcast! And of course, don't forget to hit that Subscribe button to have new episodes delivered straight to your feed!

Episode Summary  On this episode of Fertility Cafe, Eloise dives into the complicated question: what's happening with supply and demand in the world of third-party reproduction? COVID-19 has certainly had a drastic effect on the availability of surrogates, egg donors, and sperm donors, yet at the same time, the demand for these crucial pieces to the third-party reproduction puzzle has only increased. Can it all be blamed on the pandemic, or is something else going on here?   Eloise explores several angles of this dilemma, including:  How COVID-19 shutdowns and precautions initially affected the industry, and how those effects are still being felt today Why we currently have a serious shortage of surrogate applications — despite the fact that applications were pouring in during the height of pandemic shutdowns in 2020 The increased availability and acceptance of surrogacy as a viable path to parenthood, particularly for gay men, and how this is increasing demand for qualified surrogates Why there is such a shortage of egg donors and sperm donors, and how at-home DNA testing may play a role The continued lack of diversity among donors and possible solutions How the #donorconceived conversation is playing out on TikTok and other social media outlets, and what kind of role this might play in people's willingness to donate An outlook on the future of third-party reproduction and how the conversation may need to change Resources Learn more about our podcast: Fertility Cafe Learn more about our surrogacy and egg donation agency: Family Inceptions How to apply to be a surrogate: the application process How to apply to be an egg donor: the application process On the blog: What is Surrogacy? On the blog: A Beginner's Guide to Fertility Acronyms   Rate, Review, and Subscribe!  We would be honored if you took the time to rate and review our podcast! And of course, don't forget to hit that Subscribe button to have new episodes delivered straight to your feed!

Dr. Lori Marshall is the medical director and a founding partner of Pacific Northwest Fertility in Seattle as well as Clinical Professor of Obstetrics & Gynecology at University of Washington School of Medicine.  She serves as the director of the Pacific NW Fertility Center for Collaborative Reproduction, overseeing its donor egg bank, and donor egg, gestational carrier, and donor embryo programs.

Following her own very personal experience as a parent through gestational surrogacy in 1990, Darlene first served as a contract coordinator in a reproductive law firm. She learned about the legal aspects of egg donation and surrogacy while coordinating documentation for intended parents, donors, and surrogates during the legal contract stages. Darlene started to successfully connect high-profile clients with egg donors and surrogates in 1998—and did so with absolute confidentiality. In 2000, Darlene left the law office to become the founder and CEO of A Perfect Match, Inc. (APM.) Amy Stewart Kaplan, President/Founder of West Coast Surrogacy, began her career in reproductive medicine in 1990, and has since devoted her life to the field. Amy got her start at a Southern California IVF center. It was there she began to realize her passion for reproductive technology as well as a desire to assist others in this worthy pursuit. Links for more resources Learn more about Darlene Pinkerton: A Perfect Match Learn more about Amy Kaplan: West Coast Surrogacy Learn more about our podcast: Fertility Cafe Learn more about our surrogacy and egg donation agency: Family Inceptions Learn more about independent surrogacy: Surrogacy Roadmap Rate, Review, and Subscribe!  We would be honored if you took the time to rate and review our podcast! And of course, don't forget to hit that Subscribe button to have new episodes delivered straight to your feed!

Richard Vaughn is a parent via surrogacy and egg donation and is the founding principal of International Fertility Law Group, a law practice focused exclusively on assisted reproductive technologies (ART). Links for more resources Learn more about Richard Vaughn:  International Fertility Law Group Learn more about our podcast: Fertility Cafe Learn more about our surrogacy and egg donation agency: Family Inceptions Learn more about independent surrogacy: Surrogacy Roadmap Rate, Review, and Subscribe!  We would be honored if you took the time to rate and review our podcast! And of course, don’t forget to hit that Subscribe button to have new episodes delivered straight to your feed!

This episode is about surrogate partner involvement. The husband, wife, or committed boyfriend or girlfriend of a would-be surrogate has an important role to play which cannot be overlooked. In this episode, we talk all about how surrogacy is a shared experience and what partners should expect when the lady in their life becomes a gestational surrogate.  We Discuss Topics Such As: Why so many partners are initially opposed to the concept of surrogacy. We clear up the 7 most common misconceptions which prevent partners from immediate excitement.  We list the considerations worthy of candid discussion between would-be-surrogates and their partners. We list what exactly is expected of partners, and how difficult, on a scale of 1 to 10, each task is. We share just why the full support of a partner is required. Why a lady cannot do this without the "buy in" from her person.  We share real stories of partners going "above and beyond" in support of the journey.  And how to patiently bring you partner around to the idea of you becoming a surrogate.   Despite this episode being all about partners, you do not need to be married or in a committed relationship to become a surrogate. Many single women become surrogates. You are able to do so if you have a stable, supportive tribe or support person, whether a parent or a close friend.  This episode of Fertility Cafe was guest hosted by Jesse Fiest. Fertility Cafe's Creator and Weekly Host, Eloise Drane, will be back with the next episode. 

Today I have the pleasure of speaking with….Maya Grogel, Jennifer Vesbit and Gina Davis of Empower Donation. These are three women united, on a mission to normalize embryo donation as a family building option.  Together they have founded Empower Donation, an education company dedicated to increasing awareness, empowering choice and fostering understanding for everyone involved in embryo donation. Links for more resources Learn more about our guest: Em*Power Donation Learn more about our podcast: Fertility Cafe Learn more about our surrogacy and egg donation agency: Family Inceptions Learn more about independent surrogacy: Surrogacy Roadmap Documentary: One More Shot Support and Education Embryo Donation Support Advocate Genetics   Rate, Review, and Subscribe!  We would be honored if you took the time to rate and review our podcast! And of course, don’t forget to hit that Subscribe button to have new episodes delivered straight to your feed!

More and more Americans seem to be struggling with infertility these days. Is this a matter of increased awareness? Certainly, more people are talking openly about their struggles than ever before. But can the numbers really be chalked up to less stigma around the conversation of infertility. On this week’s episode, host Eloise Drane dives into what the science says about the increase in fertility issues in the United States. Studies point to an alarming decline in the average male’s sperm count and quality. More women are struggling with PCOS, fibroids, and undefined infertility. Eloise examines the issue from all angles: are environmental toxins to blame? Are these infertility issues due to people waiting until an older age to try having children? What about the economy and the overall declining birth rate? Join us for a robust discussion about the state of infertility today, and what there is to be done about it.   Topics on today’s episode include: Why some scientists believe most couples will need the assistance of reproductive technology by the year 2045 How everyday items like grocery store receipts and food wrappers could be contributing to declining sperm rates How many people actually struggle with infertility in the United States, and how it’s treated Why birth rates are significantly lower so far in 2021, despite the predicted “pandemic baby boom” A look toward the future of assisted reproductive technology and infertility treatments for families of all shapes and sizes Resources Learn more about our podcast: Fertility Cafe Learn more about our surrogacy and egg donation agency: Family Inceptions The Environmental Working Group: Consumer Guides On the blog: Understanding the Basics of IVF On the blog: A Comprehensive Guide on the Cost of Raising a  Child Find your unique path to parenthood: https://familyinceptions.com/parents/

Our guest today is Chiquita Lockley, Executive Producer and Director of Eggs Over Easy. Eggs Over Easy: Black Women & Fertility is a documentary film about black women fertility, family building choices, and maternity care.   Links for more resources Learn more about: Eggs Over Easy Learn more about our podcast: Fertility Cafe Learn more about our surrogacy and egg donation agency: Family Inceptions Learn more about independent surrogacy: Surrogacy Roadmap Blog: Why Many Black Women are Silent About Their Struggle with Infertility

In today’s episode, host Eloise Drane gives her insight into the ins and outs of choosing an IVF clinic. With over two decades of experience in the infertility industry, Eloise has seen it all! From state-of-the-art clinics to single practitioners who offer highly personalized service, she’ll discuss what to look for, what to avoid, and how to evaluate success rates when shopping for a fertility clinic.  Eloise covers questions and topics such as:  How do you evaluate a fertility clinic’s success rates? And do those numbers really matter, anyway?  The advantages and disadvantages of different types of IVF clinics. Should you choose to work with a solo practitioner, a large practice, or something in between? What about a hospital or university-affiliated clinic? The who’s who of clinic staff, and how to get all the details on their qualifications. Some red flags to watch out for. Pro tip: be skeptical of anyone who guarantees a certain outcome. Specific questions to ask about the technical capabilities and procedures in the clinic’s lab.  The all-important question of cost, and how to evaluate a clinic’s shared risk, refund, or financing programs.    Links for more resources Learn more about our podcast: Fertility Cafe Learn more about our surrogacy and egg donation agency: Family Inceptions Learn more about independent surrogacy: Surrogacy Roadmap On the blog: Understanding the Basics of IVF On the blog: Being Thankful for IVF Technology Find your unique path to parenthood: https://familyinceptions.com/parents/ Rate, Review, and Subscribe!  We would be honored if you took the time to rate and review our podcast! And of course, don’t forget to hit that Subscribe button to have new episodes delivered straight to your feed!

Sasha Ottey is Founder and Executive Director of PCOS Challenge: The National Polycystic Ovary Syndrome Association. Serving 55,000 members, PCOS Challenge is the leading patient support and advocacy organization for people with PCOS. Sasha started PCOS Challenge after she was diagnosed with PCOS and experienced great dissatisfaction with the availability of support resources for women with the condition. Links for more resources Learn more about the National Polycystic Ovary Syndrome Association: PCOS Challenge Learn more about our podcast: Fertility Cafe Learn more about our surrogacy and egg donation agency: Family Inceptions Learn more about independent surrogacy: Surrogacy Roadmap Rate, Review, and Subscribe!  We would be honored if you took the time to rate and review our podcast! And of course, don’t forget to hit that Subscribe button to have new episodes delivered straight to your feed!

Everything you never knew you needed to know about surrogacy! On this week’s episode, we’re spilling the tea on all the strange facts, surprising details, and interesting tidbits about surrogacy. We asked our surrogates, past and present, our staff, and our buddies in the field to share what they wish they knew before beginning a surrogacy journey. From what not to do during the application process (hint: don’t assume a particular answer will disqualify you!) to the surprisingly common “crying husband” phenomenon on delivery day...it’s all on the table! We’ll discuss topics including: How long the screening process really takes...and how to be choosy about the agency you work with. The fact that this is YOUR journey too, and you are choosing your IPs just as much as they are choosing you. Why surrogacy isn’t just another side hustle plus what you can expect to receive for compensation. Why you might need to dust off that high school biology book (or just have google handy for all the fertility clinic meetings. Hey Siri, what’s an oocyte?) The reason why kids seem to “get it” more easily than grownups, plus how to field silly-yet-common questions like “Will the baby have your curly hair?” Links for more resources Learn more about our podcast: Fertility Cafe Learn more about our surrogacy and egg donation agency: Family Inceptions Learn more about independent surrogacy: Surrogacy Roadmap How to apply to be a surrogate: The Application Process On the blog: Ten Things That Make You an Ideal Surrogate Rate, Review, and Subscribe!  We would be honored if you took the time to rate and review our podcast! And of course, don’t forget to hit that Subscribe button to have new episodes delivered straight to your feed!

Erin is a freelance writer and a donor conceived rights advocate. At age 35, she found out from her parents that she was conceived using donated sperm. It was all a shocking experience and it inspired her to create the community and resource “We Are Donor Conceived”. Erin wanted other donor-conceived people to benefit from the resources she had amassed in her own search. Links for more resources Learn more about Donor Conceived Children:  We Are Donor Conceived Learn more about our podcast: Fertility Cafe Learn more about our surrogacy and egg donation agency: Family Inceptions Learn more about independent surrogacy: Surrogacy Roadmap Rate, Review, and Subscribe!  We would be honored if you took the time to rate and review our podcast! And of course, don’t forget to hit that Subscribe button to have new episodes delivered straight to your feed!

On today’s episode of Fertility Cafe, we explore everything you need to know about surrogacy for gay parents. With advancements in assisted reproductive technology and expanded access to family-building resources for the LGBTQ community, it’s fully possible for gay men to have their own biological children. More gay men are turning to parenthood via surrogacy than ever before. Host Eloise Drane dives into how surrogacy works for gay men and what they can expect from the process. We cover the entire process, taking you from the very basics of baby-making in the not-so-traditional way, to the egg donor and surrogate selection process, and beyond. We’ll talk through an overview of what a surrogacy journey entails, from start to finish, with a special emphasis on how gay men experience it. Episode highlights include: A crash course in anatomy and human reproduction: we’ll follow the path of an egg and how IVF is used to create an embryo in the lab. The ins and outs of finding an egg donor—should you use an egg bank or ask a friend or family member to be your donor? What characteristics should you look for in an egg donor? How do you decide which partner’s sperm to use? What’s the difference between working with a surrogacy agency vs. going the independent route? What makes someone a good surrogate, and how do you find your perfect match? An overview of legal issues faced by gay men in the United States Links for more resources Learn more about our podcast: Fertility Cafe Learn more about our surrogacy and egg donation agency: Family Inceptions Learn more about independent surrogacy: Surrogacy Roadmap Interactive Surrogacy Law Map On the blog: Same-Sex Couples and Surrogacy Rate, Review, and Subscribe!  We would be honored if you took the time to rate and review our podcast! And of course, don’t forget to hit that Subscribe button to have new episodes delivered straight to your feed!

On this episode we have two lesbians chatting about non-traditional families. Jaimie Kelton and Robin Hopkins, the creators and hosts of the popular podcast If These Ovaries Could Talk, realized the world needed to know there was more than one way to make an LGBTQ family. Links for more resources Learn more about guest:  If These Ovaries Could Talk Learn more about our podcast: Fertility Cafe Learn more about our surrogacy and egg donation agency: Family Inceptions Learn more about independent surrogacy: Surrogacy Roadmap Rate, Review, and Subscribe!  We would be honored if you took the time to rate and review our podcast! And of course, don’t forget to hit that Subscribe button to have new episodes delivered straight to your feed!

On today’s episode of Fertility Cafe, we talk about one special group of women who just so happen to make up a large share of surrogate mothers in the United States: military wives. What makes these women so uniquely suited to serve as surrogates? Is there something in particular that motivates or inspires them to answer the call? Surrogacy has long been a hot topic in military circles, and for good reason: military wives happen to make up a significant portion of all surrogates in the United States. With statistics showing that military wives account for as much as 25% of all surrogates, something’s definitely going on! Flexibility, resilience, independence, and a strong sense of duty are all factors that military wives and surrogate mothers tend to have in common. That, coupled with the incredibly tight-knit and supportive milspouse community, means that more military wives are answering the call to surrogacy than any other segment of the US population. Host Eloise Drane dives into the topic of military wives and surrogacy by exploring several topics, including: What unique qualities and characteristics do military wives possess that make them particularly suited to be surrogate mothers? Why many military families refer to surrogacy as the “mommy deployment,” and what it takes for the entire family to mobilize in support of a surrogate’s pregnancy. How the military’s infamous “hurry up and wait” culture makes a nice parallel with a surrogacy journey. How online milspouse communities gave birth (pun intended) to the milspouse-as-surrogate phenomenon. What role does financial compensation play in a military wife’s motivation to become a surrogate? How much can she make as a surrogate? Does TRICARE cover surrogacy? What steps does a military spouse need to take to become a surrogate? Links for more resources Learn more about our podcast: Fertility Cafe Learn more about our surrogacy and egg donation agency: Family Inceptions Learn more about independent surrogacy: Surrogacy Roadmap Blog: Milspouse & Surrogacy How to apply to become a surrogate: Application Process Rate, Review, and Subscribe!  We would be honored if you took the time to rate and review our podcast! And of course, don’t forget to hit that Subscribe button to have new episodes delivered straight to your feed!

Erica McAfee is the Founder and CEO of Sisters in Loss, a maternal child health company that helps Black women replace silence with storytelling around pregnancy and infant loss and infertility.  She is also a Certified Birth & Bereavement Doula, Doula Trainer and Mentor, and Mom to 2 babies in heaven and one rainbow baby Maxwell also known as Super Mighty Max. Sisters in Loss provides pregnancy, birth, postpartum, bereavement, and grief services to help women step beyond anxiety and fear and into trust and peace after loss.  It's self-titled podcast spotlights resilient Black mothers who share intimate details of their journey to motherhood through painful, but inspirational loss and infertility stories. Links for more resources Learn more about guest: Sisters in Loss, Erica McAfee Learn more about our podcast: Fertility Cafe Learn more about our surrogacy and egg donation agency: Family Inceptions Learn more about independent surrogacy: Surrogacy Roadmap Rate, Review, and Subscribe! We would be honored if you took the time to rate and review our podcast! And of course, don’t forget to hit that Subscribe button to have new episodes delivered straight to your feed!

On today’s episode, we’re going to talk about what happens after an Intended Parent has finally found his or her ideal egg donor. Host Eloise Drane tells it like it is, setting realistic expectations, in hopes of warding off disappointment and frustration during the egg donor process. The decisions, first to work with an egg donor and then who your donor will be, are huge and can be emotionally fraught. It can help to have a complete overview of the process, from start to finish, including all the potential delays and obstacles. We’ll discuss topics including: [3:32] The typical timeline for working with an egg donor, starting with selection of a donor all the way through retrieval. [9:05] An overview of every possible delay you might experience during a fresh egg donor cycle. [20:52] How will your donor be monitored during the medical phase, and what happens if something doesn’t go as expected? [28:36] The debate between frozen vs. fresh cycles. [30:08] What the live birth statistics tell us and why so many IPs still prefer fresh egg donor cycles despite it not being the fastest.  Links for more resources Learn more about our podcast: Fertility Cafe Learn more about our surrogacy and egg donation agency: Family Inceptions Learn more about independent surrogacy: Surrogacy Roadmap On the blog: Three Tips to Save Time and Money When Pursuing Egg Donation On the blog: How Do I Find Specific Types of Egg Donors? Rate, Review, and Subscribe! We would be honored if you took the time to rate and review our podcast! And of course, don’t forget to hit that Subscribe button to have new episodes delivered straight to your feed!  

Black and brown women experience infertility at almost 2x the rate of our counterparts and yet are least likely to seek treatment. In addition, many conditions that directly impact fertility, such as fibroids, endometriosis, PCOS, and others disproportionately affect black women as well. On today’s episode, Rev. Stacey Edwards-Dunn Founder of Fertility for Colored Girls shares her own infertility journey, her organization, the cultural norm of silence shrouding fertility and family building topics, and what institutions of faith can do better for those who are struggling to conceive. Links for more resources: Learn more about Fertility For Colored Girls: Fertility for Colored Girls Learn more about our podcast: Fertility Cafe Learn more about our surrogacy and egg donation agency: Family Inceptions Learn more about independent surrogacy: Surrogacy Roadmap

On today’s episode, we’re going to look into some of the most sensationalized surrogacy cases that have hit the headlines. While a lot of these stories have the appeal of a juicy tabloid exposé, they’re worth examining as cautionary tales and as a way to understand why so many are vocally opposed to the practice. Surrogacy gives intended parents hope where they were lacking it before—everyone deserves to experience parenthood if they so desire, and without alternatives to traditional family building, that wouldn’t be possible. And so, it’s up to people like us, who believe that surrogacy is an empowering and necessary path to parenthood, to do everything we can to protect its status, both legally and in the public’s perception. The best way to do that? By doing your homework, adhering to best practices, and never, ever cutting corners, especially when it comes to the legal side of your surrogacy journey. If you plan to DIY as much of the process to save on costs, more power to you! I fully support that. However, you do NOT want to end up in the headlines because you skipped some important steps or failed to get a solid contract drafted. This is one of the major reasons why I developed a new course, Surrogacy Roadmap, to guide intended parents along the path of independent surrogacy: wisely, legally, and mindfully. If you’re thinking about going the independent route, check out the link https://surrogacyroadmap.com Links for more resources Learn more about our podcast: Fertility Cafe Learn more about our surrogacy and egg donation agency: Family Inceptions Learn more about independent surrogacy: Surrogacy Roadmap

In this episode of Fertility Cafe, host Eloise Drane talks with Candace Wohl about safe independent surrogacy. Candace Wohl, writer, public speaker, and over-sharer of all things infertility is now a mother through surrogacy after over a decade long struggle. Candace and her husband Chris decided that in order to overcome adversity, they must stare it directly in the face with humor and positivity through their award-winning blog, “Our Misconception” which started in 2012. The couple was also featured on MTV’s True Life, “I’m Desperate to Have a Baby,” a documentary on couples who struggle with infertility, and MTV’s Check-Ups and Check-Ins. Candace is also a contributor for Huffington Post, POPSUGAR, Pregnantish, and many other online sites and magazines. Candace and her husband have been featured throughout national TV as well as on GQ, Women’s Health Magazine, Google Blog, Glamour, O, The Oprah Magazine, and a variety of other national outlets. Apart from her professional career as a content writer and digital marketing specialist, she is also a fierce advocate towards pushing for family-building legislation and infertility awareness and is an active volunteer for RESOLVE: The National Infertility Association. Apart from her advocacy work, in her spare time, she leads a RESOLVE support group, helping couples who are struggling with infertility and miscarriage.   “You have to change your perspective, but you have to be in a place where you can.”     During this 53-minute episode Eloise and Candace discuss:    Candace’s surrogacy journey started with a blog + MTV series in 2012.  Being blind to the options from the grief from loss and how Candace moved past this. Surrogacy is a relationship-talking and listening on all ends is key. Making it a priority to support their gestational carriers every step of the way.  The differences between both of Candace’s GC’s.  Importance of having a birth plan ahead of time and sticking to it as much as possible with respect to all parties.

In the season two opening episode of Fertility Cafe, host Eloise Drane is talking about how COVID-19 affected surrogacy. In this episode, she talks about the struggles that both surrogates and their intended parents faced during the early to middle stages of the COVID-19 pandemic. 

In Fertility Cafe episode #20, Host, Eloise Drane and Dr. Bethea-Walsh talk about the psychological evaluations and mental health consultations which kick off a surrogacy journey. Both intended parents and surrogate candidates often feel nervous about the prospect of speaking with a mental health professional but as Eloise and Dr. Bethea-Walsh discuss, there is nothing to be nervous about. Your mental health professional is not looking for perfection. They simply want to make certain that both the surrogate candidate and the intended parents understand the undertaking and are ready for the realities of the journey. 

The most common questions that a potential intended parent asks often is what’s the difference between: Adoption and Surrogacy? A common misconception is that adoption and surrogacy are the same thing, which I can tell you: they are not! Today, I’d like to share my thoughts about each path, and what you’ll want to consider, plan for, and think through before navigating each one. In no way is this podcast all-inclusive, covering every single aspect of both surrogacy and adoption. Instead it's a starting point to help with your decision-making process, and a thought starter to think through the pros and cons of each scenario.

After being in the industry for now 20 years, I’ve become increasingly troubled by the realization that a huge percentage of people can’t fulfill their dreams of parenthood because of the staggering costs. IVF is expensive. Surrogacy is expensive. And these costs keep too many people from pursuing their dreams of becoming parents.  So yes, I am an agency owner, but I know that agency costs can be prohibitive. Because of this, I’m on a mission to make it known that you CAN do surrogacy without an agency. It IS possible to have a successful surrogacy journey without paying thousands upon thousands of dollars in agency fees. And I’m here today to tell you how it’s done. Learn more are www.SurrogacyRoadmap.com

Join us for Part 2 of Regina Townsend - founder of The Broken Brown Egg - and Eloise's very honest and important conversation about Black women's reproductive health and fertility. Black women experience infertility at almost 2x the rate of our counterparts and yet we are least likely to seek treatment. In addition, many conditions that directly impact fertility, such as fibroids, endometriosis, PCOS, and others disproportionately affect black women as well. The harmful stereotypical belief that black women are somehow more fertile, or that we don’t participate in foster care, adoption, or fertility treatments is yet another factor. Newsflash: We aren’t, and we do.

Black women experience infertility at almost 2x the rate of our counterparts and yet we are least likely to seek treatment. In addition, many conditions that directly impact fertility, such as fibroids, endometriosis, PCOS, and others disproportionately affect black women as well. The harmful stereotypical belief that black women are somehow more fertile, or that we don’t participate in foster care, adoption, or fertility treatments is yet another factor. Newsflash: We aren’t, and we do. Together, Regina Townsend - founder of The Broken Brown Egg - and Eloise are partnering to encourage other Black women to begin this very important dialogue of reproductive health and fertility.

There are many costs associated with fertility treatment, pregnancy and eventually, the delivery of one (or more) children in the case of multiples. Whether it’s the in vitro process, your gestational surrogate’s care, or unexpected NICU costs, considering insurance coverage, what you have, what your surrogate has, and what you may need is highly recommended With only thirteen states requiring insurance companies to cover infertility treatment, securing fertility benefits through your health insurance company is a hot topic. So where do you start in advocating for fertility benefits and coverage for infertility treatments? And how often do insurance companies agree to add the coverage? In today’s episode, Eloise talks with Davina Fankhauser, a former fertility patient and the co-founder of the national non-profit Fertility Within Reach, which works to increase access to health benefits for fertility treatment and preservation. How did Davina become an advocate in the world of infertility? Which 13 states mandate IVF and fertility health insurance coverage? If someone wants to approach their employer about adding insurance benefits for fertility treatments to the company insurance plan, what are the most important points to make? Many people make the assumption that if their insurance plan doesn’t include fertility benefits, there is nothing they can do... but that's not always the case. Learn how often insurance companies agree to cover infertility treatments. Are insurance companies becoming more agreeable as the rate of infertility grows and the need for non-traditional family-building methods such as egg donation and surrogacy becomes more commonplace? Davina walks us through the process of petitioning an insurance plan to cover fertility treatments.

Are you being called to be an egg donor? Then this episode is for you - the potential egg donor - and we'll be answering all of your lingering questions about the egg donation process. This episode will inspire you and inform you so that you can move through this journey with confidence and make your egg donation journey a fulfilling one. Listen in as Eloise addresses some of the more commonly asked questions potential egg donors have and some of the less obvious ones which are equally as important, such as: What is your 'why' for becoming an egg donor? Are you ready for the psychological and emotional impact of egg donation? What are the potential pitfalls of egg donation? Will my future fertility be affected? How do you feel about the concept of limited anonymity in the age of rapid DNA testing?

You've been thinking about becoming a gestational surrogate for a while now. For months, maybe even years, you've thought about what it would be like to give someone the precious gift of motherhood or fatherhood. It's been weighing on your heart. So what's stopping you from pursing your calling? In this week's episode, Eloise talks with 5-time surrogate Rebekah Hills about the highs and not-so-highs of surrogacy. Learn why the Dr.'s have dubbed her uterus "golden" and what she looks for in the IPs she matches with. This episode is a must-listen for any woman thinking about being a surrogate, or any IP who wonders what goes through the GCs mind throughout the journey.

In this episode of Fertility Cafe, we're going to focus on the more complicated and emotionally charged surrogacy topics specifically relevant to your journey to become a surrogate: why your BMI is so important; the psychological evaluation and the role of mood stabilizing drugs; receipt of government assistance as a disqualifier; and even the topic of termination and selective reduction. Buckle up ladies - Eloise doesn't sugar coat the truth, and this is going to be a bumpy ride! Let’s Stay in Touch Want to share your story or ask Eloise a question? Email us at fertilitycafe@gmail.com Learn more about our podcast: https://thefertilitycafe.com Learn more about our surrogacy agency: https://familyinceptions.com Learn more about independent surrogacy: https://surrogacyroadmap.com

You want to become a surrogate, but you're wondering how to make sure your partner or spouse is on board with your decision? One of the most important aspects of a successful surrogacy journey is a strong support system. Your partner or spouse is obviously a HUGE part of that support. Eloise's husband Anthony joins her in The Fertility Cafe to have an open, honest, and REAL discussion about a spouse's reaction to his wife becoming a surrogate. Grab your partner and listen together - you may be surprised at what you learn! In this episode: What's a normal reaction for a partner or spouse to have? Tips for talking to your partner or spouse about your desire to become a surrogate How does race play into a surrogacy journey? Let’s Stay in Touch Want to share your story or ask Eloise a question? Email us at fertilitycafe@gmail.com Learn more about our podcast: https://thefertilitycafe.com Learn more about our surrogacy agency: https://familyinceptions.com Learn more about independent surrogacy: https://surrogacyroadmap.com

If you’re thinking about being a surrogate or becoming a parent via surrogacy, this episode is a must-listen! When it comes to the legalities of parenthood using a surrogate, you do NOT want to cut any corners. Surrogacy law is at once complex, fascinating and often inconsistent depending on what country, state, or even county you live in. Here’s the good news, though: gestational surrogacy has become a common practice in many countries, and there ARE legal regulations in many places that make sense and protect all parties involved. There are also many people who have gone before you, paving the way with case law, ethics committees and legal precedents. In this episode, Eloise tackles the tough questions including: What is a Gestational Surrogacy Agreement, and is it enforceable? What makes Ukraine such an attractive destination for surrogacy? Why is surrogacy illegal in some states and countries? Why do some people consider surrogacy unethical or exploitative of women? Where in the world can LGBTQ couples safely and legally become parents via surrogacy? Do I really need an attorney to handle my surrogacy? Let’s Stay in Touch Want to share your story or ask Eloise a question? Email us at fertilitycafe@gmail.com Learn more about our podcast: https://thefertilitycafe.com Learn more about our surrogacy agency: https://familyinceptions.com Learn more about independent surrogacy: https://surrogacyroadmap.com

Egg donation is not a new technique. The success rate for pregnancies from donor eggs has increased dramatically over the years, with 55% of all embryo transfers using donor eggs results in a successful pregnancy. But how do you go about choosing an egg donor? In this episode, we'll cover the qualities you should look for when searching for a donor, pros and cons to the various methods of finding a donor, and even the most common fears we hear from intended parents as they weigh their decisions. In this episode: Eloise reviews the basics of egg donation – who needs to utilize donor eggs and a high-level overview of the process Is egg donation the right option for you? Eloise talks through the emotional parts of utilizing donor eggs to start your family Anonymity is a thing of the past thanks to online genetic testing and DNA websites… so how should this effect your decision in choosing a donor? Eloise reviews the available options for locating an egg donor Nurture vs. nature: what qualities really matter in your egg donor? What type of legal contracts must be in place to secure your parental rights? The cost of egg donation in the year 2020 Let’s Stay in Touch Want to share your story or ask Eloise a question? Email us at fertilitycafe@gmail.com Learn more about our podcast: https://thefertilitycafe.com Learn more about our surrogacy agency: https://familyinceptions.com Learn more about independent surrogacy: https://surrogacyroadmap.com

How do you find the right woman to be your surrogate? This is one of the most important decisions you will make, and there are many factors to consider when finding the right match for your journey to parenthood. When it comes to finding your surrogate, you’re looking for someone you’ll be spending a decent amount of time with. You have to be aligned in your expectations. You'll want to find a woman who is stable, healthy, trustworthy, and open-minded. In this episode of Fertility Cafe, Eloise will go into the detail of finding your match, the questions you MUST ask, and sensitive topics to take into consideration. Show notes: thefertilitycafe.com/episodes Let’s Stay in Touch Want to share your story or ask Eloise a question? Email us at fertilitycafe@gmail.com Learn more about our podcast: https://thefertilitycafe.com Learn more about our surrogacy agency: https://familyinceptions.com Learn more about independent surrogacy: https://surrogacyroadmap.com