Podcasts about gay men

Re-air from the Tower Gang catalog.Listen to James' Podcast, The Blackbird Podcast! - https://www.blackbirdpodcast.com/ Listen to Nick's Podcast, The Individualist! - https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-individualist/id1553742445 Follow us on Twitter! Magnus - @PanvidyaMagnus James - @JamesLJ Nick - @Nick_Individual Toad - @Anarcho_Toad Fat Dave - @FatComicDaveBecome a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/tower-gang--6419789/support.

Gay men are great at living fabulously. Retiring fabulously is a different story. David and John Auten-Schneider went from $51,000 in credit card debt to financial independence and now spend their time helping other gay men figure out why their bank account does not match the life they want. They join Rick for episode 400 to talk about the scarcity mindsets, status spending, and financial blind spots that keep LGBTQ men working longer than they have to. If you are in your 50s or 60s and have not saved enough, this episode is not a lecture. It is a plan. Key Takeaways: How David and John went from $51,000 in debt to financial independence and what that actually requiredWhy gay men face unique financial pressures that straight financial advice does not account forThe scarcity mindset that keeps LGBTQ men from building real wealth even when they earn wellHow to determine your retirement runway and when you can realistically stop workingWhy paying off debt and building assets require the same discipline applied in a different directionThe Retirement Readiness Review and what it can tell you about where you actually stand About John & David David and John, are husbands living their fabulous life. They help other gay men like you who also want to live an amazing life without sacrificing your financial security. Their Queer Money™ podcast, provides  tools and resources to help you live fabulously, not fabulously broke. The are also the creators of the Queer Money Retire Abroad Planner & Calculator Connect With John & David Website Instagram Facebook Queer Money Retire Abroad Planner & Calculator Hey Guys, Check This Out! Are you a guy who keeps struggling to do that thing? You know the thing you keep telling yourself and others you're going to do, but never do? Then it's time to get real and figure out why. Join the 40 Plus: Gay Men Gay Talk, monthly chats. They happen the third Monday of each month at 5:00 pm Pacific - Learn More! Also, join our Facebook Community - 40 Plus: Gay Men, Gay Talk Community

What if anal sex simply isn't part of the sex you want? In this episode, Ken Howard, LCSW, CST, explores "sides"—gay men who prefer sexual expression without anal intercourse—and credits psychologist and certified sex therapist Dr. Joe Kort for originating and developing the term. Ken reframes being a side not as an absence of sexuality, but as one valid choice within a broad erotic repertoire. He discusses consent, pleasure, sexual health, and the important difference between a genuine preference and avoidance driven by fear, pain, shame, or missing information. The goal is not to steer anyone toward a particular sexual act; it is sexual self-empowerment: understanding your desires, boundaries, health, and options well enough to make choices that truly belong to you.

With his fantastic debut graphic novel, THE NIGHTINGALES (Avid Reader Press), Emil Wilson tells a heartbreaking and beautiful coming-of-age story of the AIDS era. We talk about his father's decision in 1985 to bring a work-friend with AIDS into their home (in a small town in Oregon), how he fictionalized his family and the story well enough to make the fiction true, how he figured out the amazing sketchbook style of the book, and how he only came to comics in his 50s, following a 25-year career as an at director an ad agency. We get into his experiences at The Center for Cartoon Studies, where he was older than most every other student, the Nora Krug book that was his gateway drug into comics, my advice when he began this project, his work as an AIDS buddy for Gay Men's Health Crisis in the '80s and how younger people he meets have no knowledge of the AIDS era, how making The Nightingales changed his understanding of his family, and how it felt to make a "user's manual" for his father. We also get into the contrast between advertising and comics, how making comics can feel a bit like making films or videos, how the language to describe comics may need to evolve just as the language for gay life had to, why this book isn't a memoir but is full of faces, how kindness can be complicated, and more. Follow Emil on Instagram, and Bluesky • More info at our site • Support The Virtual Memories Show via Stripe, Patreon, or Paypal, and subscribe to our e-newsletter

Apps are a huge part of modern gay life. We delete them, reinstall them, swear them off, go back on, and keep trying to figure out whether they're helping us connect or quietly getting in the way. In this episode, we're talking about app seasonality: that on-again, off-again relationship many gay men have with the apps, and the skill of knowing when they're serving you, when they're draining you, when to use them…and when to lose them. We're getting into: Why apps can be the right choice in one season and the wrong choice in another How to know when it's time for a break or hiatus When getting back on the apps can actually be the healthy choice The difference between using apps intentionally vs. compulsively How the apps can reveal your patterns around rejection, desire, sex, dating, and self-worth Whether you're on the apps, off the apps, or currently “just checking who's nearby,” this conversation will help you bring more honesty, agency, and self-trust to the way you use them. Today's Hosts: Matt Landsiedel Michael DiIorio - Take the 360° Self-Review for Gay Men Support the Show - viewer and listener support helps us to continue making episodes - CONNECT WITH US - Watch podcast episodes on YouTube Join the Gay Men's Brotherhood Facebook community Get on our email list to get access to our monthly Zoom calls Follow us on Instagram | TikTok Learn more about our community at GayMenGoingDeeper.com - LEARN WITH US - Building Better Relationships online course: Learn how to nurture more meaningful and authentic connections with yourself and others. Healing Your Shame online course: Begin the journey toward greater confidence and self-worth by learning how to recognize and deal with toxic shame. Gay Men Going Deeper Coaching Collection: Lifetime access to BOTH courses + 45 coaching videos and 2 workshop series. Take the Attachment Style Quiz to determine your attachment style and get a free report. Chapters (00:00:00) - Gay Men Going Deep: Grindr On-Off-Again(00:01:31) - Apps' On-Again, Off-Again Cycle(00:02:14) - Matt on Why He Joined Grindr(00:06:03) - Michael Jackson on 'Both'(00:06:14) - On The Difference Between Grindr and Hinge(00:08:28) - Gay Dating: Compulsivity vs Intentionality(00:11:37) - Scruff's 'What's Behind the Paywall'(00:13:10) - When It's Time To Take a Break From Grindr(00:16:59) - Marriage on Grindr When You're Traveling(00:19:23) - Gay Men on Dating Apps(00:22:48) - Both Apps and No Apps(00:23:17) - "No Response Is a Response" on Grindr, Hinge(00:26:45) - When Do You Know You're Ready to Go Back On?(00:28:15) - What Are You Looking To Experience With Your Gay Guy?(00:32:16) - What is Your Ideal Pace of Connection?(00:34:07) - Amino and Matt on Gay Men's Brotherhood

John Taylor and Tami explore the importance of engaging executive functioning in relationship repair and recovery. John offers several questions that partners can ask to jump-start engagement in rebuilding trust. They then answer participant questions about transactional relationships, realistic expectations for change after 25 years of betrayal, and the reality of building a relationship with someone who is selfish.    TAKEAWAYS: [1:10] Why your brain stops working after D-day.  [4:30] Hypervigilance is your brain trying to keep you safe.  [6:45] Questions to ask that engage the frontal lobe.  [7:30] What are we doing here?  [13:58] What are our priorities?  [17:35] What roles and responsibilities do we need to step into?  [21:37] What am I personally doing to align with these priorities?  [25:45] Have I considered my partner in my actions?  [29:44] Effectively reducing tension in a partnership. [33:26] Do you really want it to go back to how it was before?  [34:40] Can we stay together in a low-level transactional companionship?  [38:05] What if we don't have a shared value system?  [41:57] Is it possible for him to be functional when he's never made lasting changes?  [46:38] Is there really no relationship with someone who is selfish?  [54:02] How important are postnuptual agreements?    RESOURCES: Seekingintegrity.com Email Tami: Tami@Seekingintegrity.com Sexandrelationshiphealing.com Intherooms.com Out of the Doghouse: A Step-by-Step Relationship-Saving Guide for Men Caught Cheating, by Robert Weiss Prodependence: Moving Beyond Codependency, by Robert Weiss Sex Addiction 101: A Basic Guide to Healing from Sex, Porn, and Love Addiction, by Robert Weiss Cruise Control: Understanding Sex Addiction in Gay Men, by Robert Weiss Seeking Integrity Podcasts are produced in partnership with Podfly Productions.    QUOTES "Things getting calm doesn't switch how the brain functions."  "'Fair' means the person who has been betrayed gets to take their time to deliberate and think about terms for continuance." "Vengeance is not restitution or repair."  "We have to coax our executive functioning into existence again when it's been compromised."  "We have to believe what people show us more than what they tell us." 

Mike De Socio had embraced his gay identity when he started yearning for something beyond his monogamous relationship. A galvanizing decision later, he attended a gay men's retreat that would change everything.   Learn more and sign up for Mike's newsletter:  https://finocchio.mikedesocio.com/?utm_source=podcast&utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=girlbonerradio   Join the Girl Boner community and get special bonuses:   patreon.com/girlboner   Sign up for August's free email list for occasional updates: https://substack.com/@augustmclaughlin IG: @GirlBonerMedia   FB: @MyGirlBoner  TT:: @augustmclaughlin.gb    Save $15 at Crave! Elegant, woman-designed jewelry and toys: https://lovecrave.com/august  

'The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives' season 5 is here, and MomTok might not be able to survive this one. Jessi Draper joins Trish to spill the tea on this controversial new season, and clear the air about some of her storylines that have aged poorly. Plus, Jessi teases the future of MomTok as fallout ensues over Taylor Frankie Paul's several scandals.

In this episode we're joined by David from Gay Men's Therapy for a discussion about emotional intimacy.In the conversation, we talk hook-up apps, collective responsibility, and the link to risk-taking behaviours such as chemsex.Host: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Gareth Johnson⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠.See more Naked Men Talking conversations on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.gtv.blue⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠.

Why can't gay men just be friends?In this episode of Bubba's Banter, we're getting into the uncomfortable psychology behind gay male friendships and why building genuine, lasting brotherhood can sometimes feel harder than it should.Is it possible that we've been conditioned to see other men as sexual competition before we ever see them as potential friends? From attraction and masculinity to body comparison, social status, validation, and the pressure to constantly perform, we're breaking down how these invisible dynamics can make genuine connection difficult.We're talking about the difference between having people around you and actually having people you can trust. Because sometimes the problem isn't that we don't have enough friends. Maybe we haven't learned how to build friendships that aren't based on attraction, attention, sex, status, or what somebody can offer us.Can gay men learn to put the competition down and build real brotherhood?Let's talk about it.

Karen talks with kink coach Sarah Sloane about the leather movie Pillion, now on HBO, plus how to make sense of kink as it's represented in popular culture versus real life.OCT 25 LIVE CHICAGO SHOW! TICKETS ON SALE In this episode:Pillion (2025) The Erotic Mind by Jack MorinBooks by Laura AntoniouKink and consensual nonmonogamy coach Sarah SloaneHost, sex educator, and writer Karen Yates Get Say It Better in Bed, Karen's free guide to upping your intimacy pleasure. Download here!Show your love for Wild & Sublime: Leave a tip!The Afterglow, our Patreon membership group, brings you regular bonus content, early alerts, and discounts to live shows! Be Wild & Sublime out in the world!  Check out our tees and accessories for maximum visibility. Support the showGET TICKETS TO OCT 25th CHICAGO SHOWSupport the showFollow Wild & Sublime on Instagram and Facebook!

Most gay men do not have a conflict problem. They have a conversation problem. Joshua Johnson spent 25 years in journalism learning why people cannot talk to each other, then turned it into a TED Talk. The former NPR and MSNBC anchor joins Rick to break down what actually happens inside a difficult conversation, why your internal monologue is running the show before you say a word, and why the queer community has a specific and largely unspoken problem with mentorship and validation. This is not a civility lecture. It is a framework for stopping the patterns that keep gay men stuck in the same arguments with the same people. Key Takeaways: Why the problem in conflict is not the inability to talk but the inability to argue constructivelyHow your internal monologue shapes every difficult conversation before it startsThe journalist's trick for getting the story behind someone's position before engagingWhy responding instead of reacting changes the outcome of almost every conflictThe "common enemy intimacy" pattern that holds gay men back from real communityWhy queer men struggle to receive mentorship and positive validation and what to do about it About Joshua Joshua Johnson has spent more than 25 years in journalism, helping people see each other despite their differences. His latest project, The Resolution, is an online game where players debate everyday issues to build their persuasion skills. Previously Johnson was the anchor of “NOW Tonight”, the first 8pm program on the streaming channel NBC News NOW. Before that he anchored “The Week with Joshua Johnson” on MSNBC, providing rare spaces for audience interaction in network news. His projects for NBC included anchored specials for Black History Month, a live MSNBC broadcast from outside New York's Stonewall Inn for LGBTQ Pride Month, and a focus group of small business owners reacting to President Biden's 2022 State of the Union Address. MSNBC recruited Johnson away from the NPR daily talk show “1A”, which he hosted for its first three years on-air. During that time “1A” built a weekly audience of four million listeners nationwide. Johnson has also been an anchor and reporter at San Francisco's KQED, and at WLRN in its unique partnership with The Miami Herald. His most recent accomplishment was his TED 2026 talk. Johnson holds bachelor's degrees in Broadcasting and Theater Arts from the University of Miami. He lives in Chicago. Connect With Joshua Website TED Talk 2026 Facebook Instagram LinkedIn Hey Guys, Check This Out! Are you a guy who keeps struggling to do that thing? You know the thing you keep telling yourself and others you're going to do, but never do? Then it's time to get real and figure out why. Join the 40 Plus: Gay Men Gay Talk, monthly chats. They happen the third Monday of each month at 5:00 pm Pacific - Learn More! Also, join our Facebook Community - 40 Plus: Gay Men, Gay Talk Community

Why do the guys who are a little distant, a little edgy, and a little hard to get feel so magnetic? Is it actually attraction…or is a deeper pattern being activated? In this episode, we unpack what's going on underneath the pull toward “bad boys” and why it can feel so intense, compelling, and hard to walk away from. We talk about: What exactly is it about “bad boys” that makes them so attractive What we're really responding to beneath the surface  Why intensity can feel like chemistry, but isn't always compatibility What “bad boys” do well that “nice guys” can learn from How to take those traits into your own dating life—without the chaos If you've ever found yourself drawn to someone who felt exciting but hard to reach, this episode will help you understand why—and what to do differently. Today's Hosts: Matt Landsiedel Michael DiIorio - Take the 360° Self-Review for Gay Men Reno Johnston Support the Show - viewer and listener support helps us to continue making episodes - CONNECT WITH US - Watch podcast episodes on YouTube Join the Gay Men's Brotherhood Facebook community Get on our email list to get access to our monthly Zoom calls Follow us on Instagram | TikTok Learn more about our community at GayMenGoingDeeper.com - LEARN WITH US - Building Better Relationships online course: Learn how to nurture more meaningful and authentic connections with yourself and others. Healing Your Shame online course: Begin the journey toward greater confidence and self-worth by learning how to recognize and deal with toxic shame. Gay Men Going Deeper Coaching Collection: Lifetime access to BOTH courses + 45 coaching videos and 2 workshop series. Take the Attachment Style Quiz to determine your attachment style and get a free report. Chapters (00:00:00) - Why Bad Boys Feel So Good(00:01:38) - Are Bad Boy Guys Hot?(00:03:19) - What Are We Actually Attracting To Bad Boys?(00:07:24) - Good Boy vs Bad Boy(00:11:08) - Good Boy Or Bad Boy?(00:15:05) - Queer as Folk on Michael(00:16:00) - A Neil Gaiman's Brotherhood(00:16:43) - What Can We Learn From Bad Boys?(00:20:36) - Is Your Bad Boy Unafraid Of Getting Cancelled?(00:22:00) - Do Bad Boys Get Attracted To Women?(00:24:28) - I'm The Bad Boy(00:27:39) - Good Boy vs. Bad Boy(00:30:45) - Good Boy vs. Nice Guy(00:32:13) - The Gay Man Going Deeper: Nice Guys

Send us Fan MailSomebody out there really claimed that washing his butt would “make him gay,” and we had to unpack the whole idea from the ground up. We go from hygiene and bidets to the deeper stuff hiding underneath: shame, fragile masculinity, and why taking care of your body should never feel like an identity crisis. Along the way, we share a garden surprise involving a truly enormous zucchini, because life insists on keeping us humble.Then we catch up on summer life in Denver, including Pride from our favorite balcony perch, the shifting mood when our LGBTQ community feels pressure, and our very honest hobby at Washington Park: “watching the puppies” (translation: appreciating sweaty joggers while we snack). We also talk theater nights with The Sound of Music, camping with friends from the Pride48 community, and the chaos of snow and hail storms that push us to rebuild and reimagine our backyard space.The heart of the conversation lands on a line that hits hard: you marry the best parts of a person and hope you can tolerate the rest. We connect it to friendship, long-term partnership, Al‑Anon lessons, and the freedom that comes from accepting a truth we all fight at some point: you cannot change other people. We close with Madonna's Confessions 2, the healing power of music, and why dancing has always been a lifeline in gay culture and chosen family.If you like funny, candid storytelling with real takeaways about relationships, codependency recovery, LGBTQ life, and pop music nostalgia, hit play. Subscribe, share with a friend, and leave a review so more people can find us.Enormous Website: www.EnormousPodcast.comVoice mail: (303) 351-2880Email: EnormousPodcast@gmail.comTwitter: www.Twitter.com/@EnormousPodInstagram:www.Instagram.com/Enormous_PodcastFacebook:www.Facebook.com/EnormousPodLink: The Soundtrack Of Our Life Video PlaylistLink: Male Diva EDM Spotify  Play ListLink: Songs Of Our Life Spotify Play List  

In this episode: More hilariously vague Grindr phrases translated Why “not on here much” rarely means what it says The difference between losing interest and genuinely ghosting someone Why men initiate conversations they have no intention of continuing Whether apps provide validation even when no hookup happens The endless cycle of taps, photos, attention and disappearing Why possibility can feel more exciting than actually meeting App fatigue and the exhaustion of repetitive conversations When silence becomes disrespectful Whether brutal honesty is really better than no response Maybe sex isn't what prevents gay men from forming meaningful connections. Maybe the real obstacle is how easily we've learned to treat one another as temporary squares on a screen. And remember: “Hey stranger” is not an apology. Hot Topic: Remembering Dolly and a Texas Federal judge blocks anti-drag ban while citing Dolly... Hot Topic: Tim Curry also dies the same day as Dolly who played the film version of Frank-N-Furter of 'Rocky Horror Picture Show". Hot Topic: Gay Georgia elects first Black, Gay Congressman Everton Blair Hot Topic: Good news for those living with HIV - a potential new weekly pill would replace daily pill... Advice: Do you try to not get emotionally attached to people... Thirst Trap: Which adult performer took the hottest shot of the week and why? Follow Steve V's new Substack features weekly articles. 20% Off now through end of August! https://substack.com/@thenakedtruthsteve Follow Stevie on IG: @iam_stevev Follow Kodi on IG: @mistahmaurice Rate and Review us! Wanna drop a weekly or one time tip to TAGSPODCAST - Show your love for the show and support TAGS! Visit our website: tagspodcast.com Needs some advice for a sex or relationship conundrum? Ask TAGS! DM US ON IG or https://www.talkaboutgaysex.com/contact Follow Of a Certain Age on IG: @ofacertainagepod Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

What starts as a discussion about age gaps in relationships quickly evolves into a deeper debate about influence, consent, friendship, and the responsibilities we have when someone clearly tells us who they are and what they want. Along the way, Jay, Torrian, and Chef Von unpack the challenges of loneliness in the Black LGBTQ+ community, whether power can exist beyond age, and where the line is between genuine connection and manipulation. As always, the conversation gets passionate, personal, and a little messy, but it leaves plenty for listeners to think about. Join the conversation and leave us a voicemail at 213-349-8220 Follow us on all social media platforms  IG - @catchmyblackandgay  Twitter- @catchmyblackgay  Website: https://catchmyblackandgay.com

Many gay men prepare financially for retirement, yet still feel uncertain about what they are retiring into. Ken Howard, LCSW, CST, explores the "blueprint gap": reaching later life without an inherited picture of what a satisfying retirement should contain. Traditional retirement narratives often assume children, grandchildren, lifelong heterosexual marriage, and an extended family prepared to provide companionship and care—assumptions that may never have applied to gay men. This episode examines retirement identity, chosen family, purpose after work, financial security, LGBTQ+-affirming long-term care, and the AIDS-era loss of elders who might have modeled aging for subsequent generations. Ken offers reflective questions and practical ways to begin building a later life around connection, creativity, community, safety, and personal meaning.

Gay men over 40 have been running from shame their entire lives. Frank Spinelli says that is exactly the wrong move. As a physician, survivor, and author of The Shame Compass, Frank has spent decades watching gay men mistake shame for the enemy when it is actually a diagnostic tool pointing toward healing. The AIDS crisis, childhood trauma, the invisibility of aging, the pressure to perform — all of it leaves a mark. This episode is about what to do with that mark instead of burying it. Frank joins Rick to break down his C.O.M.P.A.S.S. framework and why gay men are done running. Key Takeaways: Why shame was installed in gay men before they even had words for who they wereHow the AIDS crisis created layers of survivor and caretaker shame that never got addressedWhy aging gay men face a second wave of shame around invisibility and relevanceWhat the C.O.M.P.A.S.S. framework actually does and how to use itWhy pausing is the hardest and most important skill gay men can buildHow to stop treating shame as the enemy and start using it as a compass About Frank Frank Spinelli, MD is a physician, certified health coach, and one of 95,000 survivors who filed claims in the Boy Scouts of America bankruptcy case. With over twenty years of clinical experience in internal medicine, he brings unique authority to trauma-informed recovery: medical expertise, lived experience of childhood sexual abuse and pandemic relapse, and active coaching practice implementing the C.O.M.P.A.S.S. framework with clients. Today, he works with hundreds of clients through the Reframe platform, helping individuals apply trauma-informed tools to navigate shame, addiction, and behavioral change. He is the author of The Shame Compass: A Radical Framework for Trauma Healing and Self-Acceptance, as well as PEE-SHY: A Memoir and The Advocate Guide to Gay Men's Health and Wellness. A former TV host and longtime health writer, Dr. Spinelli brings both clinical authority and media experience to conversations about recovery, resilience, and living with authenticity. Connect With Frank Website Instagram Hey Guys, Check This Out! Are you a guy who keeps struggling to do that thing? You know the thing you keep telling yourself and others you're going to do, but never do? Then it's time to get real and figure out why. Join the 40 Plus: Gay Men Gay Talk, monthly chats. They happen the third Monday of each month at 5:00 pm Pacific - Learn More! Also, join our Facebook Community - 40 Plus: Gay Men, Gay Talk Community

Intimacy sounds like something we all want, but being truly seen can feel terrifying. In this episode, we talk about why fantasy often feels safer than reality, why vulnerability can feel exposing, and how the fear of rejection keeps many gay men hiding behind performance.  We also get personal about our own struggles with being seen, how this shows up in dating. This episode is about the fear beneath the fantasy: the part of us that wants closeness, but panics when closeness asks us to be honest, visible, and emotionally available. We talk about: Why intimacy can feel unsafe even when we crave it The fear of being fully seen, known, and rejected Why fantasy feels easier than real connection How to feel safer, more grounded, and more open to intimacy A deep, honest conversation for gay men who want connection, but sometimes find themselves pulling away when it starts to get real. Link: Matt's Secure Attachment Handbook  Today's Hosts: Matt Landsiedel Michael DiIorio - Take the 360° Self-Review for Gay Men Support the Show - viewer and listener support helps us to continue making episodes - CONNECT WITH US - Watch podcast episodes on YouTube Join the Gay Men's Brotherhood Facebook community Get on our email list to get access to our monthly Zoom calls Follow us on Instagram | TikTok Learn more about our community at GayMenGoingDeeper.com - LEARN WITH US - Building Better Relationships online course: Learn how to nurture more meaningful and authentic connections with yourself and others. Healing Your Shame online course: Begin the journey toward greater confidence and self-worth by learning how to recognize and deal with toxic shame. Gay Men Going Deeper Coaching Collection: Lifetime access to BOTH courses + 45 coaching videos and 2 workshop series. Take the Attachment Style Quiz to determine your attachment style and get a free report. Chapters (00:00:00) - Gay Men Going Deep: Why Intimacy Feels Safer(00:02:16) - What Is Intimacy Really Like?(00:06:15) - Married People Say They're Not Attracted To Perfect People(00:09:17) - What Are You Afraid Of Being Proactively Rejected For?(00:12:38) - Geminis Have A Fear Of Intimacy(00:13:24) - What Am I Afraid Of In A Relationship?(00:17:03) - When Did You Start Naked With Your Girlfriend?(00:17:31) - How to Love Yourself (No Fear of Intimacy)(00:22:15) - How to Develop Secure Attachment(00:23:50) - "I Get Scared in Intimacy"(00:26:51) - The Gay Men's Brotherhood

This episode of The Wild Podcast features hosts Brandon Cardoso, Julian Barboza, Parker Reid, and Kyle Jacobs, with special guest Justin Laid joining the conversation. They engage in candid, humorous, and personal discussions about their experiences at the Hard Summer music festival, content creation on platforms like TikTok and Blue Page, personal lifestyle topics, and navigating social life as young creators. The group discusses viral moments and interview highlights, including a notorious clip involving an armpit licking incident that garnered over 10 million views.

Seeking validation isn't just about chasing likes. It's the part of us that needs approval, wants to belong, and feel accepted. But does it come at a cost? In this episode, we unpack the subtle ways validation-seeking still shows up in our everyday lives, especially as gay men who learned early to scan, adapt, perform, and manage how we're perceived. We talk about the difference between healthy feedback and outsourcing your self-worth, and what it actually looks like to build self-trust in real life. In this episode, we discuss: What validation-seeking actually looks like The difference between caring what people think and letting their opinion become a verdict on your worth Why self-trust requires tolerating discomfort, disappointment, and disapproval How we're each still learning to come back to ourselves in more honest, grounded ways Self-trust doesn't mean you stop caring what people think- it means their reaction no longer gets to decide who you are. Today's Hosts: Matt Landsiedel Michael DiIorio - Take the 360° Self-Review for Gay Men Reno Johnston Support the Show - viewer and listener support helps us to continue making episodes - CONNECT WITH US - Watch podcast episodes on YouTube Join the Gay Men's Brotherhood Facebook community Get on our email list to get access to our monthly Zoom calls Follow us on Instagram | TikTok Learn more about our community at GayMenGoingDeeper.com - LEARN WITH US - Building Better Relationships online course: Learn how to nurture more meaningful and authentic connections with yourself and others. Healing Your Shame online course: Begin the journey toward greater confidence and self-worth by learning how to recognize and deal with toxic shame. Gay Men Going Deeper Coaching Collection: Lifetime access to BOTH courses + 45 coaching videos and 2 workshop series. Take the Attachment Style Quiz to determine your attachment style and get a free report. Chapters (00:00:00) - Coming Home To Yourself(00:01:56) - Why Do Gay Men Seek Validation?(00:03:43) - What Does Validation Seeking Actually Look Like?(00:05:51) - What Does It Look Like to Be Overcomfortable?(00:07:20) - Michael Buble on Being Validated(00:07:57) - Michael Says He Feels Good About Himself(00:08:45) - Validation Seeking and How It Affects Your Life(00:13:53) - How to Stop Seeking External Validation(00:18:10) - What does validation seeking look like in your life?(00:18:35) - Why Is Self-Trust So Difficult For Gay People?(00:23:26) - "People Plead"(00:27:58) - What Makes Self Trust So Difficult?(00:31:43) - The Importance Of Identity(00:33:28) - Self-Trust Coaching(00:34:08) - Michael on Coming Home To Himself(00:35:38) - What Would I Do If I Wasn't Trying To Be Like(00:39:35) - Coming Home to Yourself(00:43:20) - Getting Back Home to Yourself(00:46:26) - Why I Don't Need To Explain My Time(00:48:06) - Coming Back Home To Yourself

What began as affectionate nostalgia, remembering the men who taught them gay culture, the language, how to navigate the lifestyle — gradually unfolds into a heavier realization. With the hindsight of adulthood and therapy, we come to name what they experienced for what it was: grooming! Join the conversation and leave us a voicemail at 213-349-8220 Follow us on all social media platforms  IG - @catchmyblackandgay  Twitter- @catchmyblackgay  Website: https://catchmyblackandgay.com

In Chinese society, a society particularly concerned with family, being a gay man can be particularly hard. The pressure is so great for gay men to have wives and children, that many of them choose to say in the closet throughout their entire lives. And it's certainly difficult for them, it's also difficult for their wives. In this lesson, two women discuss this social issue. Episode link: https://www.chinesepod.com/2103

In Part 2 of Five Love Languages Reimagined for Gay Men, Ken Howard, LCSW, CST explores why receiving gifts and physical touch can mean far more than they seem. Gifts may communicate that your partner stayed in your mind; touch can offer comfort, safety, and belonging without needing to lead to sex. Ken connects these everyday moments to attachment, the histories gay men bring into relationships, and a central question for couples: does the way I'm loving you actually feel like love to you?

His father rejected him. His grandmother changed everything. Brad Ryan spent seven and a half years driving across America with his 85-year-old grandmother, visiting all 63 national parks, and quietly healing the wounds his coming out left behind. What started as an adventure became something neither of them expected: a reckoning with family, identity, and the stories gay men tell themselves about who will ever truly accept them. Brad joins Rick to talk about what happens when you stop waiting for the people who hurt you and start showing up for the ones who show up for you. Key Takeaways: Why Brad didn't come out until college and what his father's reaction cost himHow a camping trip in the Smoky Mountains became the turning point with his grandmotherWhy gay men build elaborate stories about rejection that don't match realityWhat intergenerational connection offers gay men that their own community often can'tHow curiosity instead of judgment transforms even the most broken family relationshipsWhy healing doesn't always look like confrontation — sometimes it looks like a road trip About Brad Brad Ryan is a veterinarian, wildlife conservationist, social media influencer, and writer from southeastern Ohio. He earned his BA from Miami University in Ohio, an MSc in mammalian biology from the University of Pretoria in South Africa, and a DVM/MPH combined degree from The Ohio State University, specializing in wildlife medicine and veterinary public health. For Brad, storytelling is a vehicle for healing—rooted in empathy, inspired by nature, and driven by a desire to help others feel seen and connected. As a keynote speaker, he champions LGBTQ+ inclusion in the outdoors, eliminating stigma around mental health, and the protection of wildlife Connect With Brad Website Instagram Facebook LinkedIn Hey Guys, Check This Out! Are you a guy who keeps struggling to do that thing? You know the thing you keep telling yourself and others you're going to do, but never do? Then it's time to get real and figure out why. Join the 40 Plus: Gay Men Gay Talk, monthly chats. They happen the third Monday of each month at 5:00 pm Pacific - Learn More! Also, join our Facebook Community - 40 Plus: Gay Men, Gay Talk Community

Send us Fan MailThe episode discusses a recent trend I have noticed while scrolling through social media: a specific group of gay people—mostly cisgender white gay men—publicly stating “I support Trump.” #GayPolitics #Trump #LGBTQ #GayMen #Cisgender #SocialMedia #WhiteGayMen #PoliticsSupport the show

In this episode: Why summer makes gay men feel more sexual and adventurous Naked beaches and the freedom of being seen Cruising in Central Park's Ramble Curiosity about sex parties and group experiences Shirtless confidence versus body anxiety Working out for yourself versus working out for validation Queer spaces, community, and spontaneous connection Knowing your boundaries while still allowing yourself to explore Whether our “feral” selves might actually be our most honest selves Hot Topic: Love for Berlin when a van killed and injured many at the Pride festival... Hot Topic: Would you get a butt facial? Hot Topic: Adult performer Derek Kage turns down a collab with Dirk Dawson but not with Dawson's husband.... Hot Topic: Have you heard of 'gym penis'? Hot Topic: Neighbors are trying to shut down Denny Blaine Park nude beach in Seattle, Washington ... Advice: where do you rank on the hotness scale when hooking up? A guy who is new to the scene wonders.... Follow Steve V's new Substack features weekly articles: https://substack.com/@thenakedtruthsteve Follow Stevie on IG: @iam_stevev Follow Kodi on IG: @mistahmaurice Rate and Review us! Wanna drop a weekly or one time tip to TAGSPODCAST - Show your love for the show and support TAGS! Visit our website: tagspodcast.com Needs some advice for a sex or relationship conundrum? Ask TAGS! DM US ON IG or https://www.talkaboutgaysex.com/contact Follow Of a Certain Age on IG: @ofacertainagepod Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

The five love languages can be useful—but for gay men, they often carry deeper psychological meaning. In Part 1 of this two-part episode, Ken Howard, LCSW, CST, reimagines the familiar framework through the lived experiences of gay men. He explores why words of affirmation can be about being seen, why acts of service can become a way of earning closeness, and why quality time is less about hours together than genuine emotional presence. The deeper question is not simply how we express love. It's why certain expressions of love make our nervous system feel safe, valued, and connected. Part 2 will cover receiving gifts, physical touch, and the attachment psychology beneath the five love languages.

July 27th, 2026 - We discuss a troubling report that found that one in five US bishops would ordain men with deep-seated same-sex attraction. Links, Show Notes & More - https://thestationofthecross.com/act Email Us! ACT@TheStationOfTheCross.com

Skip Sams spent years deciding which version of himself was allowed into which room. Corporate leader in one. Recovering addict in another. HIV positive kept quiet in most of them. Then the rollback of DEI protections and rising pressure on gay men to shrink again forced a reckoning: hiding pieces of yourself is not integrity, it is negotiation. Skip breaks down why integrating every part of his identity, instead of editing it room to room, is what actually built his leadership, and why he is gathering twenty men for the Gay Men of Integrity Leadership Summit to practice the same thing. Listeners walk away with a way to stop splitting themselves apart and start deciding who they are, everywhere, all at once. Key Takeaways: Why Skip stopped editing himself room to room and calls that his real definition of leadershipThe actual difference between keeping something private and keeping it secretHow the DEI rollback is pushing gay men back toward old hiding habitsWhat the Gay Men of Integrity Summit is built to address, and who it is forWhy the words you use about yourself matter more than most men realize About Skip Skip Sams is a certified professional coach, speaker, and creator of the Gay Men of Integrity Leadership Summit. He helps gay men close the gap between who they truly are and how they show up in their relationships, careers, and communities—so they can live with greater clarity, confidence, and integrity. For more than a decade, Skip has coached individuals through life's transitions, helping people navigate identity, purpose, relationships, and personal growth. Today, he helps gay men build lives that are true to who they are—not who they think they're supposed to be. He is also the creator of the Gay Men of Integrity Leadership Summit, August 10 - 14, 20206. Connect With Skip Website Sign-up For The Gay Men of Integrity Leadership Summit Hey Guys, Check This Out! Are you a guy who keeps struggling to do that thing? You know the thing you keep telling yourself and others you're going to do, but never do? Then it's time to get real and figure out why. Join the 40 Plus: Gay Men Gay Talk, monthly chats. They happen the third Monday of each month at 5:00 pm Pacific - Learn More! Also, join our Facebook Community - 40 Plus: Gay Men, Gay Talk Community

Feeling bad is not a flaw in the human experience. It's an essential life skill for anyone who wants a life of love, growth, satisfaction, and intimacy— all of it requires the capacity to feel discomfort without running from it. In this episode, Michael and Matt make the case for feeling bad on purpose: when to sit with an emotion, when to change your mindset, and why emotional avoidance often costs us more than the original pain. We get into: Why feeling bad is a skill, not a personal failure The difference between allowing an emotion and reframing your thoughts How men are often taught to avoid, repress, intellectualize, or act out emotions The ways we numb and escape through food, alcohol, sex, porn, productivity, scrolling, and distraction Why building emotional capacity makes you braver, more honest, and more willing to live a bigger life The goal isn't to be happy all the time — it's to become someone who can feel bad without abandoning yourself or shrinking your future. Today's Hosts: Matt Landsiedel Michael DiIorio - Take the 360° Self-Review for Gay Men Support the Show - viewer and listener support helps us to continue making episodes - CONNECT WITH US - Watch podcast episodes on YouTube Join the Gay Men's Brotherhood Facebook community Get on our email list to get access to our monthly Zoom calls Follow us on Instagram | TikTok Learn more about our community at GayMenGoingDeeper.com - LEARN WITH US - Building Better Relationships online course: Learn how to nurture more meaningful and authentic connections with yourself and others. Healing Your Shame online course: Begin the journey toward greater confidence and self-worth by learning how to recognize and deal with toxic shame. Gay Men Going Deeper Coaching Collection: Lifetime access to BOTH courses + 45 coaching videos and 2 workshop series. Take the Attachment Style Quiz to determine your attachment style and get a free report. Chapters (00:00:00) - Why Feeling Bad Is Good For You(00:01:46) - Why Are People So Bad at Feeling Bad?(00:06:06) - How to Win with Emotions(00:08:13) - How to Love Yourself(00:13:16) - How to Get Through Trauma(00:16:52) - What Emotion Is The Hardest To Deal With?(00:20:05) - How To Live A Fully Feeling Life(00:20:54) - How to Deal With Feeling Bad(00:23:48) - The ego takes over the body(00:24:32) - Gay Men's Ways To Cope With Feeling Bad(00:25:45) - How to Stop Feeling Bad(00:29:31) - How to Love Yourself Through Fear(00:30:38) - How to Handle Negative Emotions(00:34:37) - People Cope With Crying(00:35:29) - Gay Men's Brotherhood

• Feeling completely unedited in queer sexual spaces • Whether sex clubs are less judgmental than apps and gay bars • Body confidence, aging and the desire to feel seen • Tenderness and connection during anonymous encounters • The difference between sexual nourishment and emotional escape • Consent, boundaries and creating safer sexual experiences • Why watching, socializing or doing nothing can still be part of the experience • Can a brief sexual encounter be a meaningful form of queer intimacy? Are sex clubs places where gay men lose themselves—or where some gay men finally get to meet themselves? Hot Topic: The gay debate on 'making love' or simply 'f*cking'.... Hot Topic: Gays get called out for wearing stars and stripes on the 4th of July... Hot Topic: Jim Parsons on coming out late...what he felt he was robbed of... Hot Topic: The cruise of hell? More Atlantis drama... Advice: What to do when you run into a nearby Grindr profile that isn't a match... Follow Steve V's new Substack features weekly articles: https://substack.com/@thenakedtruthsteve Follow Stevie on IG: @iam_stevev Follow Jeremy on IG: @jrosslopez Follow Kodi on IG: @mistahmaurice Rate and Review us! Wanna drop a weekly or one time tip to TAGSPODCAST - Show your love for the show and support TAGS! Visit our website: tagspodcast.com Needs some advice for a sex or relationship conundrum? Ask TAGS! DM US ON IG or https://www.talkaboutgaysex.com/contact Follow Of a Certain Age on IG: @ofacertainagepod Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

In this Episode, Kelly is joined by writer Gabriel Rotello! He is the author of two books: Sexual Ecology: AIDS and the Destiny of Gay Men and The CBGB Conspiracy. He became the first openly gay op-ed columnist for a major American newspaper and is the founder of Out Week Magazine. He has also written, directed, and produced dozens of TV documentaries for major networks like HBO, Netflix, and the History Channel. Gabriel talks about growing up in Danbury, Connecticut, and traveling into the city with his older brother when he was 13! Even at that age, he knew he wanted to move to New York when he grew up. Kelly asks him what life was like in New York in the 1970s. Gabriel talks about how Manhattan was a playground for young adults in their early 20s. He tells us how cheap his rent was, describes the decay of the Bowery in great detail, and talks about how wonderful it was to play music at CBGB.  Kelly asks Gabriel about CBGB. Gabriel tells us that in the beginning, no one wanted to go there. He describes the "Bowery Bums", the mismanagement of the venue, and its terrible location. He then talks about how it became one of the most famous punk venues in the world.  Gabriel talks a bit about his book: The CBGB Conspiracy. He tells Kelly that he actually did not want to write a book about his time in the 70s at first. With the aids epidemic looming over it, he thought it too depressing. But when inspiration struck, while walking along the street one day, he came up with the idea of creating a murder mystery, with CBGB as the background and weaving in famous people of the era, along with his personal experiences. Kelly asks Gabriel a bit about the process of writing, and Gabriel talks about how he was inspired by a past guest of our show, Jonathan Mahler! He talks about reading Ladies and Gentlemen, The Bronx Is Burning... and being transported back into that time in his life.  Kelly then asks Gabriel what gay life was like back in the day. Gabriel describes the streets of the West Village being filled with shirtless gay men dancing and having the best time on a random Tuesday night. He talks about how there was a feud between the East Village gay community and the West Village gay community. He talks about their differences, what it was like to have one foot in both, and he reflects on how his perception has changed since then.   Gabriel then talks a bit about his partner Hap, who passed during the Aids Epidemic. Gabriel had met Hap when he was studying abroad and just happened to run into each other when he moved to New York. Gabriel talked about how Hap showed him the ropes as a newly out man. He talks about how they dated until Hap's passing. Kelly talks about marching on Washington in support of the movement. Gabriel talks about how it inspired him to start Out Week Magazine, and how he invited outing! But above all else; Gabriel Rotello is a New Yorker! Kelly Kopp's Social Media:@NewYorkCityKopp on all platforms Buy Gabriel's Book! Gabriel's Social Media: @GabeRotello  Jae's Social Media @Studiojae170    Chapters (00:00:00) - New Yorkers: Gabriel Rotello on the Podcast(00:01:57) - Phil Collins on Coming Out in NYC(00:06:02) - Living in the East Village in the 60s(00:09:51) - Punishment for Bowery Bums(00:14:57) - The Talking Heads on Hilly Hill's Death(00:19:50) - Madonna's First Public Gig(00:20:32) - CBGB's Conspiracy is a Novel(00:26:00) - The Making of A Time to Win(00:26:33) - In the Elevator With Steven Spielberg(00:31:42) - Inside The Bowery(00:32:24) - How To Write a Novel(00:33:03) - In the Elevator With Jonathan Harris(00:37:07) - How a dime changed the phone(00:37:24) - Adam Levine on the Gay Scene in New York(00:41:18) - Punk and Disco in the East Village(00:44:13) - In the Elevator With Out Week(00:47:12) - Gabriel on ACT UP and the Gay Community(00:50:54) - What It Means to Be a New Yorker(00:52:47) - How To Find Gabriel Ortello On Social Media

Something goes wrong in bed and gay men immediately blame desire, performance, or themselves. Sex educator and trauma specialist Fran Frye says they're diagnosing the wrong problem. The real issue is the nervous system — and most men have no idea it's running the show. Rick and Fran dig into the five nervous system responses that hijack sexual experiences, why porn is an idea not a manual, and how shame quietly replaces honest communication for gay men over 40. This is not a conversation about dysfunction. It's about finally understanding what your body has been trying to tell you. Key Takeaways: Why "erectile difficulties" are almost always psychological, not physicalHow fight, flight, freeze, fawn, and fuck responses show up during sexThe difference between consent and compliance, and why it mattersWhy gay men struggle more than most with saying noWhat emotional literacy actually looks like in an intimate encounterHow to pause high arousal states before they run the show About Fran Fran Frye works at the intersection of sexuality, trauma, and compassion, with a particular focus on supporting men as they unpack their sexuality within a patriarchal culture that often labels them as dangerous, defective, or emotionally closed off. She helps dismantle these narratives through curiosity, empathy and practical tools that foster healthier relationships with the body, partners and self. A certified Sex Educator, Counselor, and Clinician trained in compulsive sexual behaviors, Fran is also a somatic sex practitioner. Her work spans sexual shame, trauma, grief, relationship rupture and body disconnection, grounded in both professional training and lived experience as a sexual assault survivor, former military spouse, and athlete. Beyond her professional work, Fran is deeply committed to service. Over the years she has volunteered in several areas of crisis and community support, including suicide prevention, rape victim's advocacy, human trafficking prevention, and serving as a rape crisis hotline operator. She has also contributed to efforts addressing food scarcity, sits with hospice patients in their final chapters, and supports Veterans and their families. These experiences have brought her into close contact with trauma, grief, courage, and resilience - insights she carries directly into the compassionate, grounded way she supports others. Connect With Fran Website Instagram YouTube Hey Guys, Check This Out! Are you a guy who keeps struggling to do that thing? You know the thing you keep telling yourself and others you're going to do, but never do? Then it's time to get real and figure out why. Join the 40 Plus: Gay Men Gay Talk, monthly chats. They happen the third Monday of each month at 5:00 pm Pacific - Learn More! Also, join our Facebook Community - 40 Plus: Gay Men, Gay Talk Community

Dr. Eddie Capparucci and Tami answer participant questions about sex, love, and addiction. They cover the importance of honoring boundaries, effective check-ins, managing anger, and finding hope when it feels like your addiction has taken over your life.    TAKEAWAYS: [2:40] How do I process multiple inner children in me?  [5:07] Why has the language around betrayal become sanatized?  [11:06] What can I do to finally overcome repeated slips?  [17:08] My partner broke my boundary. Now what?  [22:55] Should I prioritize finding my why or my sobriety work?  [28:09] My spouse refuses to seek help. How can I help?  [31:08] I have too many buckets and I'm constantly disregulated. Help!  [34:25] How can my betraying partner understand the damage of trickled out disclosures?  [38:17] Can check-ins be triggering to the point that they're useful?  [45:10] How can a betraying partner rebuild trust?  [50:18] Why am I afraid of my husband's anger?  [54:46] Is there any hope for an addict like me?    RESOURCES: Seekingintegrity.com Email Tami: Tami@Seekingintegrity.com Sexandrelationshiphealing.com Intherooms.com Out of the Doghouse: A Step-by-Step Relationship-Saving Guide for Men Caught Cheating, by Robert Weiss Prodependence: Moving Beyond Codependency, by Robert Weiss Sex Addiction 101: A Basic Guide to Healing from Sex, Porn, and Love Addiction, by Robert Weiss Cruise Control: Understanding Sex Addiction in Gay Men, by Robert Weiss Seeking Integrity Podcasts are produced in partnership with Podfly Productions.    QUOTES "If your relationships are hurting, why would you want to delay getting the help?"  "Do you understand what drives you toward a slip?"  "The most important thing you can do to rebuild trust is engage with your partner."  "Your behaviors don't define who you are – if you are willing to change them." 

Many successful gay men appear to have everything: thriving careers, financial security, meaningful accomplishments, and lives that others admire. Yet beneath that success, many quietly wonder whether they are truly lovable—or simply valued for what they achieve. In this episode, Ken Howard, LCSW, CST, explores why professional success often fails to create emotional security. Drawing on more than 34 years of working with gay men, he explains how childhood experiences of monitoring ourselves, adapting to others' expectations, and earning acceptance can lead to a lifelong belief that love must be continually earned through performance. Topics include: Why success and emotional security are not the same The difference between admiration and genuine intimacy How childhood adaptation becomes adult achievement Why many high-achieving gay men still fear rejection The hidden cost of always appearing strong and capable How emotional visibility creates deeper relationships Why vulnerability—not perfection—is what builds lasting intimacy If you've ever felt admired but not truly known, accomplished but still insecure, or worried that people would lose interest if you stopped performing, this episode offers a compassionate psychological framework for understanding why—and how genuine emotional security can begin to grow.

Rethinking preventionThe funding crisis reshaping global health has hit HIV prevention particularly hard. At the same time, science is handing us some of the most powerful HIV prevention tools we have ever had – long-acting injectables like lenacapavir and cabotegravir, and a monthly oral pill on the horizon. But science alone does not deliver prevention. That takes systems, policy, funding and a trained healthcare workforce. It takes communities leading in planning, implementation and holding the HIV response to account. This episode of HIV unmuted is a curtain raiser for AIDS 2026, the 26th International AIDS Conference, taking place in Rio de Janeiro, Brazil, and virtually. The theme of the conference, Rethink. Rebuild. Rise., is also the spirit of this episode. We look at what rethinking prevention means in people's lives, what it will take to rebuild the systems and political will to deliver innovation at scale, and how the global HIV response can rise to this moment. Meet our guests:Axel Bautista, Community Mobilization Coordinator at MPACT Global Action for Gay Men's Health and Rights, shares what rethinking prevention really means on the ground, in communities and in people's lives. Nomathemba Chandiwana, Chief Scientific Officer at the Desmond Tutu Health Foundation in Cape Town and a clinician-scientist at the forefront of HIV prevention, unpacks the systems and science needed to rebuild prevention and make innovation accessible to all. Beatriz Grinsztejn, President of the International AIDS Society and infectious disease physician-researcher at Fiocruz in Rio de Janeiro, asks how the global HIV response can rise at AIDS 2026. Meet our host:Ibanomonde Ngema is a South African HIV advocate for young people living with and affected by HIV. She has spoken at major global platforms, including IAS conferences and the United Nations General Assembly. She serves as South Africa's Her Voice Fund Ambassador and UNFPA's Regional Youth Advocate for East and Southern Africa and has authored a paper in The Lancet. 

A lot of gay men pride themselves on being “nice”— easygoing, agreeable, low-drama. But what if that's exactly why you're not getting what you want? In this episode, we break down the difference between being kind and being “nice,” and how approval-seeking, conflict avoidance, and over-accommodating are quietly killing attraction, respect, and real connection.  We talk about: Why “nice” is often a strategy, not a personality The hidden cost of being liked by everyone How this shows up in dating and relationships The difference between being chosen vs. being liked How to shift from approval-seeking to self-respecting If you've ever felt overlooked, under-appreciated, or stuck in the friend-zone, this one will hit. Today's Hosts: Matt Landsiedel Michael DiIorio - Take the 360° Self-Review for Gay Men Reno Johnston Support the Show - viewer and listener support helps us to continue making episodes - CONNECT WITH US - Watch podcast episodes on YouTube Join the Gay Men's Brotherhood Facebook community Get on our email list to get access to our monthly Zoom calls Follow us on Instagram | TikTok Learn more about our community at GayMenGoingDeeper.com - LEARN WITH US - Building Better Relationships online course: Learn how to nurture more meaningful and authentic connections with yourself and others. Healing Your Shame online course: Begin the journey toward greater confidence and self-worth by learning how to recognize and deal with toxic shame. Gay Men Going Deeper Coaching Collection: Lifetime access to BOTH courses + 45 coaching videos and 2 workshop series. Take the Attachment Style Quiz to determine your attachment style and get a free report. Chapters (00:00:00) - Gay Men Going Deeper: The Nice Guy Trap(00:01:04) - Being Nice(00:03:16) - What Does Being A Nice Guy Actually Mean To You?(00:05:46) - Matt on Being A Nice Guy(00:09:49) - Have You Ever Been The Nice Guy?(00:13:30) - Is Your Friend Think You're A Nice Guy?(00:17:16) - What Is Niceness In Your Relationships?(00:20:09) - Gayman's Brotherhood: Connection Circles(00:20:54) - Why Being a Nice Guy Backfires in Dating(00:23:16) - Matt Says Being Honest In Dating Backfires(00:28:19) - In the Elevator With Michael(00:29:38) - Gay Men on Dating and Relationships(00:30:19) - How to Shift From Being Nice to Being Chosen(00:35:02) - How To Be With Yourself(00:39:06) - Be Candid With Yourself(00:42:15) - Michael Jackson on Not Being Like Everyone(00:45:34) - Matt on Not Being the Nice Guy(00:48:20) - Thank You!

Gay men over 40 know how to find sex. What most of them have never been taught is how to find connection. Court Vox is a certified sex and intimacy coach, founder of The Bodyvox, and one of the sharpest voices working with GBTQ men on what actually gets in the way of real intimacy. He joins Rick to talk about choice fatigue on dating apps, the ruptures that quietly kill relationships before they start, and why so much of what gay men call attraction is really just unexamined shame running the show. This is the conversation about desire that most men are not ready to have. Key Takeaways: How app culture creates choice fatigue that makes genuine connection harderWhy rupture and repair skills are the most underrated tools in any relationshipHow to tell the difference between facts and feelings when conflict hitsThe role homophobia and internalized misogyny play in gay men's attraction patternsWhy resistance to certain desires is almost always repression in disguiseWhat somatic coaching does that talk therapy alone cannot About Court Court Vox is a Certified Sex & Intimacy Coach, based in Los Angeles CA . He is Founder of The Bodyvox. Through his courses, workshops, retreats, and private immersions, clients cultivate toys to unlock limitations and shame, to embrace a deeper sense of intimacy with their whole self. Traditional forms of therapy are done solely through talk, while the work of a somatic coach is to further this form of work via body-based exercises, experiential learning, and touch, in comfortable, judgment-free, and caring environments. Body acceptance, exploration of sensation and desires (and learning how to ask for what you want), boundary-setting and intimacy work are some of the many reasons clients seek this form of learning. Vox is a sex educator experienced working with clients of all sexualities and genders and has been featured in AskMen.com, Cosmopolitan, and Well & Good magazines. He offers workshops and retreats across the globe for GBTQ men, and is also part of an elite team of sex educators that create the celebrated program for women, Back to the Body. His online course and community, Invitations to Intimacy, offers foundations in embodiment suited for the eroticerotic, as well as a community of like-minded individuals to support one another on their journey. Attend Courts Events in 2026 Camp Connect Connect - Joshua Tree Connect With Court Website Instagram Hey Guys, Check This Out! Are you a guy who keeps struggling to do that thing? You know the thing you keep telling yourself and others you're going to do, but never do? Then it's time to get real and figure out why. Join the 40 Plus: Gay Men Gay Talk, monthly chats. They happen the third Monday of each month at 5:00 pm Pacific - Learn More! Also, join our Facebook Community - 40 Plus: Gay Men, Gay Talk Community

Have you ever opened Instagram only to discover your friends got together without you? Within seconds, your mind may begin asking painful questions: Did they forget me? Did they not want me there? What's wrong with me? In this episode, Ken Howard, LCSW, CST, explores why social exclusion hurts so deeply—and why the real wound often isn't the missed invitation itself, but the meaning we attach to it. Drawing on more than 30 years of experience working with gay men, Ken explains how childhood experiences of feeling different, monitoring ourselves, and searching for acceptance can shape our adult friendships, social lives, and sense of belonging. Topics include: Why being left out feels so painful The difference between facts and assumptions Why social media amplifies feelings of exclusion Why many gay men are waiting to be chosen instead of building connection The difference between friendship and validation How to stop organizing your self-worth around other people's invitations What genuine belonging actually looks like If you've ever wondered why a missed dinner, party, or group trip feels so much bigger than it "should," this episode offers a compassionate psychological framework for understanding what's really happening—and how to build relationships where you no longer have to wonder whether you belong.

Hookups get a bad rap as shallow, transactional, or disconnected. But what if they could actually become a space for growth, awareness, and real connection? In this episode, we're advocating for shift from default, unconscious hookups  to something more intentional, honest, and grounded. We explore how hookup culture can either reinforce negative patterns or become a powerful mirror for your patterns, desires, boundaries, and capacity for intimacy. We talk about: Why hookups aren't the problem—but how we show up in them can be The difference between unconscious vs. intentional hookups How to bring honesty, communication, and authenticity into casual sex How our own hookups have evolved over time Practical ways to make hookups more enjoyable, respectful, and connected—for everyone involved This isn't about judging hookup culture or pretending it should be something it's not. It's about raising the standard of how you show up—so even casual encounters can feel aligned, present, and real. Today's Hosts: Matt Landsiedel Michael DiIorio - Take the 360° Self-Review for Gay Men Support the Show - viewer and listener support helps us to continue making episodes - CONNECT WITH US - Watch podcast episodes on YouTube Join the Gay Men's Brotherhood Facebook community Get on our email list to get access to our monthly Zoom calls Follow us on Instagram | TikTok Learn more about our community at GayMenGoingDeeper.com - LEARN WITH US - Building Better Relationships online course: Learn how to nurture more meaningful and authentic connections with yourself and others. Healing Your Shame online course: Begin the journey toward greater confidence and self-worth by learning how to recognize and deal with toxic shame. Gay Men Going Deeper Coaching Collection: Lifetime access to BOTH courses + 45 coaching videos and 2 workshop series. Take the Attachment Style Quiz to determine your attachment style and get a free report. Chapters (00:00:00) - How To Elevate Your Hookup Culture(00:02:22) - The Pros and Cons of Hookup Culture(00:05:50) - What are the cons of hookup culture?(00:07:12) - How Gay Men View Their Hookups(00:11:36) - No More Sex: We Need Love(00:13:34) - What Makes A Hookup Good For You?(00:17:38) - "Honesty Is What Makes A Hookup Good"(00:21:15) - Demisexual Guy On Grindr(00:25:31) - Demisexual People Talk About Their Sexualities(00:26:00) - Michael On His Hookups...(00:29:59) - Elevating Your Hookups(00:31:16) - PODCAST: Please support the community

Can gay men successfully retire early? A lot of gay men tell us the same thing:“I want to retire early.”Or, let's be honest, “I want to retire yesterday.”But then comes the panic: “I don't know if I have enough.” “I don't know how much money I actually need.” “I don't know how to get from here to there.”And this is where most retirement advice makes everything worse. It tells you to chase one giant magic number: $2 million, $3 million, $4 million, or whatever number makes you want to close your laptop, pour a cocktail, and think about it later.But early retirement usually isn't about one giant number. It's about having the right money in the right places at the right time.In this episode of Queer Money, we're talking about how gay men successfully retire early by using five tactics that can speed up your retirement timeline, reduce panic, and help you design a retirement that actually fits your life.Because for gay men, retirement planning is not just about money. It's also about time, health, freedom, safety, location, relationships, and whether you really want to keep working under fluorescent lighting until Medicare shows up.Takeaways from this episode:Why chasing one giant retirement number can sabotage early retirement planningHow to calculate your gap number and your bridge numberWhy early retirement is about income sequencing, not just accumulationHow to build an income bridge before you leave workWhy taxable brokerage accounts, Rule of 55, 72(t), Roth conversions, and cash may all matterHow early retirement can create a powerful tax-planning windowWhy your health should be treated as a financial assetWhy working “just a few more years” is not always freeHow to stress test your retirement plan before you leave workWhy gay men may need to design retirement more intentionally than the traditional advice suggestsThe bigger truth? Early retirement is not always about having more money. Sometimes it's about making better decisions with the money you already have.If you want help understanding your numbers, your timeline, and your next steps, schedule a Queer Money Retirement Readiness Review at the link in the show notes.We'll help you look at where you are, what you have, what you want, and what steps may help you retire early, retire abroad, or simply retire better.Stay fabulous, not fabulously broke.Mentioned in this episode:What if your portfolio came with a visa and passport?That's exactly what the Optimize Portugal Golden Opportunities Fund can do, bringing together diversification, tax efficiency, and a path to EU residency and a passport. Click the link below to explore your ticket to Europe.Get Your Portugal Golden Visa Here!Portugal is calling. Will you answer?Don't just dream of moving to Portugal, make it happen with the investments in your IRA. Investing in Portugal gets you residency, the ability to work in Portugal and returns that just may outpace the U.S. like the Optimize Portugal Golden Opportunities fund did in 2025. Get Your Portugal Golden Visa Here!

LZ opens his “You Are Beautiful” podcast and interviews Tan France about what makes people feel beautiful, personal style, and self-image. Tan shares his daytime and evening go-to outfits, love of jewelry, and his husband's style influence, then discusses coping with online criticism and the broader culture of cruelty. He reflects on looking in the mirror, gratitude for health after a recent benign scare, appreciation for his Pakistani skin after years of hating it due to racism, and his birth name pronunciation. Tan recounts learning to sew as a child to make clothes for his mother and sister, navigating being queer and not fully out to family, and the nuance of being a visibly gay Muslim on Western TV. They discuss Queer Eye's impact, production time with participants, meaningful and difficult “heroes,” Tan's struggle with aging, marriage priorities, and advice for finding style by borrowing inspiration and building your own.Menu: 00:00 Welcome You Are Beautiful00:53 Meet Tan France01:50 Signature Style Staples06:09 Handling Online Hate12:23 Mirror Check Self Image15:45 Learning To Love Skin17:11 Real Name Roots18:41 Fashion Spark Sewing21:50 Queer Eye Coming Out25:08 Representation And Stakes27:27 Rock Bottom Realization27:37 Early Attraction Awakening28:00 Dad's Store Lessons29:14 Watching Queer Eye Hurt30:31 Why Style Matters31:08 Makeover Intimacy Method32:02 Queer Eye Time Limits34:07 Choosing Stores and Stylists36:31 Hero Who Changed Him37:58 When Heroes Resist38:38 A Racist Hero Incident40:53 Favorite Feel Good Episodes42:01 When Self Care Slips44:13 Struggling With Aging46:33 Gay Men and Beauty Pressure48:48 Off Camera Fab Five51:15 Marriage Secret Sauce52:12 Dating and LA Insecurity53:39 Finding Signature Style54:58 Beautiful Because Authentic

The Des Moines Gay Men's Chorus sings music with a message. On this episode of Talk of Iowa, we hear from two members as the chorus turns 25 years old. Then, we hear from the founder of 'The Healing Obituary.' She teaches how to write obituaries and makes the case for why they should be done by humans.

Many gay men believe their struggles stem from anxiety, loneliness, dating frustrations, low self-esteem, or difficult relationships. But underneath many of these challenges lies a quieter and often overlooked pattern: self-abandonment. In this episode, Ken Howard, LCSW, CST, explores how gay men learn to disconnect from their feelings, needs, boundaries, anger, instincts, and even their dignity in order to preserve connection, approval, desirability, or emotional safety. Drawing from more than 30 years of clinical work, Ken explains how childhood experiences of conditional acceptance, invisibility, bullying, and self-monitoring can evolve into adult patterns of self-suppression that quietly erode self-respect and intimacy. Topics include: What self-abandonment actually is Why many gay men learn to prioritize acceptance over authenticity How self-abandonment masquerades as maturity, patience, and understanding The hidden resentment created by chronic self-suppression Nine common forms of self-abandonment in everyday life How to set boundaries without guilt The difference between healthy compromise and self-betrayal Why authentic relationships require self-respect If you've ever found yourself laughing off hurt feelings, staying too long in one-sided relationships, over-explaining your boundaries, suppressing your anger, or making yourself smaller to keep the peace, this episode offers a framework for understanding what's happening—and how to begin reconnecting with yourself.

Why Have So Many Gay Men Struggled to Save for Retirement?We hear this from gay men all the time, usually those in their 50s or pushing their 60s:“I want to retire now, but I have absolutely nothing saved.”And when we ask what happened, the answer usually isn't laziness. It isn't that they didn't care. It often comes down to three quiet beliefs many gay men inherited from culture, trauma, fantasy, and avoidance.In this episode of Queer Money, we're talking about the three retirement plans that sabotage gay men and keep too many of us from saving, investing, and building the future we actually want.These are some of the biggest gay retirement mistakes we see:“I'll die young and beautiful.”“I'll marry a sugar daddy.”“I'll figure it out later.”For many gay men, especially those who came of age during the HIV/AIDS crisis, the idea of growing old, happy, healthy, loved, financially stable, and free wasn't something we were encouraged to imagine. Some of us didn't believe we'd live long enough. Some of us hoped someone else would save us. And some of us assumed we'd eventually get serious about money later.But later showed up, and now she wants receipts.This episode is not about shame. Shame is not a retirement plan either. This is about naming the myths that may have helped us survive emotionally, but are now sabotaging our older gay selves financially.Takeaways from this episode:Why many gay men struggle to picture themselves as older, secure, and financially freeHow the “I'll die young” myth became one of the most damaging gay retirement mistakesWhy waiting for a partner, husband, or sugar daddy to fund your retirement is not a planHow “I'll figure it out later” quietly sabotages retirement savings and investingWhy time in the market matters more than waiting until you “have more money”How old survival beliefs can turn into financial avoidanceWhy gay retirement planning is really about creating options, dignity, freedom, and joyHow asset acquisition and cash-flow building can help gay men retire betterIf this hits a little close to home and you're ready to finally have the retirement conversation, schedule a Retirement Readiness Review with us at the link in the show notes.We'll help you look at where you are, where you want to go, and what steps you can take to retire early, retire abroad, or simply retire better.Chapters:00:00 - Intro01:41 - Starting convo02:42 - Myth 105:52 - Myth 207:56 - Myth 311:41 - Self Reflection13:04 - Reframing 15:37 - The Fix16:33 - OutroMentioned in this episode:Portugal is calling. Will you answer?Don't just dream of moving to Portugal, make it happen with the investments in your IRA. Investing in Portugal gets you residency, the ability to work in Portugal and returns that just may outpace the U.S. like the Optimize Portugal Golden Opportunities fund did in 2025. Get Your Portugal Golden Visa Here!What if your portfolio came with a visa and passport?That's exactly what the Optimize Portugal Golden Opportunities Fund can do, bringing together diversification, tax efficiency, and a path to EU residency and a passport. Click the link below to explore your ticket to Europe.Get Your Portugal Golden Visa Here!

Dr. Marc Brackett, PhD, is founding director of the Yale Center for Emotional Intelligence and a professor in the Child Study Center at Yale University. We discuss the science of emotion regulation and practical tools to increase your emotional intelligence. Dr. Brackett clarifies exactly how to do that both in the context of relationships, but also things that you can do on your own to become more emotionally intelligent to later serve you in the context of relationships, work, school, etc. We also discuss how your childhood experiences influence your relationship with emotions, with particular emphasis on how boys and men are socialized around emotional processing and expression. Read the show notes at hubermanlab.com. Thank you to our sponsors AG1: https://drinkag1.com/huberman Joovv: https://joovv.com/huberman Lingo: https://hellolingo.com/huberman LMNT: https://drinklmnt.com/huberman Rorra: https://rorra.com/huberman Timestamps (00:00:00) Marc Brackett (00:02:55) Emotion Regulation (00:05:53) Emotion Mindset, Anxiety; Good or Bad Emotions? (00:11:25) Sponsors: Joovv & Lingo (00:13:54) Permission for Happiness; Gender, Emotion Suppression (00:22:13) Young Men, Vulnerability, Incapable; Gay Men (00:31:00) Boys & Men, Crying; Emotion Socialization (00:37:34) Sponsor: AG1 (00:38:58) Physical Interaction; Rough/Tumble Play, Teaching Emotion Regulation (00:46:47) Emotion Calibration, Tools: Leaders & Being a Role Model; Meta-Moment (00:56:15) Meditation & Stress Tolerance, Tool: Label Emotions; Childhood (01:03:12) Sponsor: LMNT (01:04:32) Understand Your Assumptions, Tool: Intentional Co-Regulation (01:12:09) Vocabulary & Rethinking Emotion, Tool: Reframing (01:15:49) Emotional Intelligence Training, Self-Evaluation (01:22:15) Living with Discomfort & Emotional Intelligence (01:27:01) Marc's Work & Criticism; Emotion "Leakage" & Switching Mindset (01:34:19) Sponsor: Rorra (01:35:32) Excitement, Positive Emotion; Modern Concerns, AI & Disconnection (01:45:11) Major Societal Challenges & Everyday Progress (01:54:38) Physical/Emotional Identity & Envision Best Self, Tool: Meta-Moment (02:05:33) Emotional Intelligence (02:12:46) Curiosity & Compassion; Reflection, Identity (02:19:32) Point of Connection Game (02:25:02) Zero-Cost Support, YouTube, Spotify & Apple Follow, Reviews & Feedback, Sponsors, Protocols Book, Social Media, Neural Network Newsletter Disclaimer & Disclosures Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Dr. Marc Breedlove, PhD, is a professor of neuroscience at Michigan State University and an expert on how hormones shape brain development and sexual orientation. We discuss how prenatal testosterone impacts whether someone is romantically attracted to men or women later in life, and what correlates of sexual orientation — such as finger-length ratios — tell us about the role of hormones in brain and psychological development. We also discuss why the number of older brothers a male has biases sexual orientation. Throughout, we explain how nature and nurture interact to shape male-female differences, behavior, and romantic partner choice. Thank you to our sponsors AG1: https://drinkag1.com/huberman David: https://davidprotein.com/huberman Rorra: https://rorra.com/huberman Function: https://functionhealth.com/huberman Timestamps (00:00:00) Marc Breedlove (00:03:24) Hormones & Sexual Orientation (00:07:37) Prenatal Testosterone, Finger Ratio, Men & Women Differences (00:14:08) Sponsors: David & Rorra (00:16:46) Finger Ratios, Prenatal Testosterone, Gay & Straight Men/Women (00:23:57) Mice & Sex Differences, Androgens (00:26:54) Brain Differences & Sexual Orientation (00:33:52) Group vs Individual Differences, Height Analogy; Bisexuality (00:36:57) Brain Development, Hormones & Behavior; Brain Plasticity (00:42:52) Sponsor: AG1 (00:44:16) Sexual Behavior, Libido (00:51:37) Gay Rams, Brain Differences (00:58:00) Aversion Pathway, Men vs Women, Same-Sex Partner (01:06:58) Congenital Adrenal Hyperplasia (CAH), Intersex Phenotypes (01:13:55) Androgen Insensitivity Syndrome (AIS) (01:18:14) Sponsor: Function (01:19:25) Gay Men & Older Brothers, Maternal Immunization Hypothesis (01:32:55) CAH Carriers, Advantage, Stress Tolerance (01:35:41) Birds & Sexual Differentiation, Gynandromorphs (01:41:32) Anabolic Steroids, Hypersexuality; Adult Brain Plasticity (01:45:31) Age & Testosterone Decline; Sexual Orientation & Activities (01:53:14) Marc's Academic Journey, Ozarks, Luck (02:02:35) Exploration; Kids & Sex Differences (02:08:47) Zero-Cost Support, YouTube, Spotify & Apple Follow, Reviews & Feedback, Sponsors, Protocols Book, Social Media, Neural Network Newsletter Disclaimer & Disclosures Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices