Podcasts about self-betrayal

In todays show Jacqueline and Chris explore the topic of secrets, lies and honesty and the roles these concepts have played in their own lives as well as the people they work with. Like most of things in our lives, there are aspects that operate above the surface of our awareness and those that operate below. They influence the way we choose to act, the masks we are unwittingly wearing and the overall level of peace in our lives. There is something in this episode for everyone so settle in and enjoy.   Watch: https://youtu.be/w5gnsTBH9h8 

We're trained to do what we're told, live like we should, and suppress desires and emotions – mostly to make the people in our world more comfortable. After years if not decades of living like this, it's likely shown up in your body as stress, anxiety, depression, weight gain, or more.Today, we're talking to Claire Uncapher about honoring yourself and really hearing and acting on the answer your soul knows to be true. Here's the tough love moment… You're not going to like the answer and it's not always going to be convenient – but it's the key to the changes that you're hungry for.In this episode, you'll learn:The 5 hurdles people struggle withDon't make it mean anything about you that it doesn'tSometimes you have to let shit fall apartThe difference between feeling and wallowingHow the emotions we push down manifest in our bodiesThe 4 steps to accepting, and embracing yourself without guiltThe unspoken agreement in our society to not rock the boatActs of self-betrayal and choosing yourself insteadClaire is a dynamic and empowering speaker and coach who brings a unique blend of expertise with her background in clinical nursing, energy therapy, and life and transformational coaching. She is dedicated to helping individuals break free from past traumas, self-limiting beliefs, and long-standing issues with her holistic approach to depression and anxiety.Resources from this episodeYou are invited to become a Founding Member of the Gutsy Collective! If you're craving community, connection, and practical and simple tools to help you make positive changes in your life, make sure to join the Gutsy Collective here. At checkout, save 21% off of your membership for the first year with the code FOUNDER21 (valid through April 8th).Connect with Claire UncapherFacebook: @claire.uncapherInstagram: @claire.uncapherWebsite: claireuncapher.com Connect with LauraAuraFacebook: @thatlauraauraTikTok:  @thatlauraauraInstagram: @thatlauraauraWebsite: LauraAura.comSupport the showTHANK YOU, GUTSY TRIBE!We love, love, love to read your comments, feedback, and reviews. If you haven't yet, drop us one below! Your review might even get highlighted within one of our gutsy love posts or on our website.https://podcasts.apple.com/podcast/the-gutsy-podcast/id1445481970

“The reason that they were able to cause me as much pain as they did is because I had already started to reject myself." - Alara SageDid you ever experience a bully in your life?Have you forgiven yourself for it?In this solopisode, Alara Sage shares a personal tribute to the bullies she encountered during her school years. She reflects on feeling disconnected from her peers and how two older girls infiltrated her friend group, targeting her with hatred. Despite the negative experiences, Laura expresses gratitude towards these bullies for the strength and resilience they unknowingly helped her develop.In this episode, you will learn:Bullies reflect back our inner beliefs and can serve as teachers for self-healing.Blaming others for our pain and suffering is disempowering and keeps us from taking responsibility for our lives.Healing comes from acknowledging and loving ourselves, recognizing our divinity and worthiness.Gratitude can be expressed towards those who have bullied or rejected us, as they have shown us our beliefs about ourselves.Acknowledging and embracing our divinity and worthiness is a powerful act of self-empowerment and transformation.There was a short prayer of forgiveness within this episode.Support the showReceive a FREE Free 22-page e-book Higher Mind Activating & Accessing Your Higher Mind Gain consistent and regular clarity in life. Connect to all aspects of Self = Wholeness. Connect into the "key of the Universe". Cultivate a relationship like no other. Activate Unity Consciousness. Videos and practices included https://www.alarasage.com/higher-mind-ebook Connect with Alara Sage Alara on Instagramhttps://www.instagram/alarasage Alara's websitehttps://www.alarasage.comDesire to work with Alara Sage? Sign Up Here!https://alarasage.as.me/connectioncall

Join me in this deeply personal episode as I share my heart-wrenching realization after a decade of living under a false pretense in a relationship. I open up about the questions that haunted me—How did I not see it? Why did I stay? The emotional turmoil made showing up in life a monumental challenge.As tears flowed, I questioned not just the relationship but my own judgment. How could I guide others in business when I struggled to trust myself in matters of the heart? The struggle was real, and the self-betrayal felt insurmountable.In this episode, we explore the emotional rollercoaster of acting against logic, feeling before thinking. I lay bare the difficulty of facing self-betrayal and the daunting task of rebuilding trust—both in others and, most importantly, in myself. If you've ever questioned your own choices, felt the sting of deceit, or battled self-doubt, this is a heartfelt guide to finding strength, healing, and authenticity in vulnerability. 

Episode S3 E11, was inspired by a conversation that I had with a classy, beautiful sisterfriend who finds herself smitten by a handsome, charming man who boomeranged back into her life. One night my friend called me and we talked into the wee hours of the morning about the "situationship" (her word not mines) that she's in. It's natural for a heterosexual woman to desire the attention and companionship of a man. But at what cost do we entertain a man? This is what I talk about in this episode. Btw, my friend granted me permission to share her story.  CONNECT WITH DEBORA Want to change your life? Book an Embrace Vulnerability Breakthrough Session My Current Offerings: https://ScheduleTimeWithDeBora.as.me/ Move Abroad Support for Black Women Over 50 https://ScheduleTimeWithDeBora.as.me/MoveAbroad Let's Conquer Loneliness Together: https://ScheduleTimeWithDeBora.as.me/ConquerLoneliness Follow me on IG SistersGatheringtoHealPodcast Do me a favor, if you enjoyed the podcast, please subscribe, share, rate & review. Thank you!  Buy me a Coffee. Thank you!   Get copies of my books Love Addicted: One Woman's Spiritual Journey Through Emotional Dependency, Why Did He Break Up With Me? Lessons in Love, Loss & Letting Go, and Write That Book! How to Start or Finish the Book You're Meant to Write @ Amazon Go to Sisters Gathering to Heal and grab a copy of 13 Things Black Women Who Love Themselves DON'T Do  And remember to love yourself FIRST and love yourself FIERCELY! 

Bonus episode. Myrna gave a talk to the women of the Trial Lawyers Association of BC in Whistler, BC on October 22, 2022. She discussed boundaries, self-regulation, the consequences of never saying no and feeling like a smeagol in a room full of frodos. Enjoy! 

Jack Dorsey discusses how he used tobetray himself, how he became infatuated with cyclamen, and how he became a successful braider.

In this episode, I chat with Erik Brynjolfsson, Director of Research at the Massachusetts Institute of Technology's (MIT) Sloan School of Management. We discuss his new book, “The Second Machine Age” and the implications it has for the future of work, technology and economics. Erik shares his insights on a variety of topics, including how advances in technology are changing how businesses operate, how business decision-making is evolving and what challenges we may face in the coming years. We also discuss the recent earthquake in Mexico and its implications for seismic risk. Finally, we

In this episode I invite you to some recent "shadow work" I have been doing of owning my disowned parts of self including ways of I have betrayed my wants, needs, and even my uniqueness. Self-Betrayal is common for all of us that experience caregivers, systems, and mindsets that tell us that we need to perform, deny our wants and needs, or play small in order to feel loved and connected to a tribe. I will discuss a mindset that puts down the lies of fearful ego and helps you see how being your unique light is how you show up in humility and heal yourself and others. We also discuss strategies of healing self-betrayal including making and keeping a consistent promise to self. Join me to do a little shadow work and step further into your light!

Special guests, friends, and sponsors, John Scott Sutherland and Shandel Sutherland, of Sutherland DDS, joined us for a discussion about the book Leadership & Self-Deception: Getting Out of the Box by The Arbinger Institute. In this last part of our conversation, we focus on the 4 different boxes we can be in. The box is a scary place to be. When we are in the box towards someone we are the one who misbehaves. We make the other person out to be worse than they really are. We look for evidence that backs up the story we are telling ourselves. We must create evidence in order to remain in our self-deception. It's scary because as hate rises, we know we are not treating people like humans and we do it anyway.THE 4 BOXES OF SELF-DECEPTIONThe 4 boxes of self-deception are: The Better Than Box: Thinking you are better than others.The I Deserve Box: Thinking you deserve certain things.The Must Be Seen As Box: Thinking that you must be seen a certain way or as a certain kind of person.The Worse Than Box: Thinking that your own problems are worse than anyone else's, so this is why you can treat people a certain way. You can operate in or out of the box. If you operate inside the box, then you see everything as a problem that someone else created. If you operate outside the box, then you will treat people as humans. FINAL THOUGHTSFirst of all, read the book. It's Leadership & Self-Deception: Getting Out of the Box by The Arbinger Institute. We highly recommend it. Next, think about the relationships you have with people. Are you in the box in some of those relationships? Get out of the box with people by building relationships with them. If you can't build a relationship with someone you're in the box with, then build relationships with the people who are friends with them. Try to understand the person you are in the box with. What is their story? Where are they coming from? Lastly, remember that we shouldn't be correcting anyone unless we have taken the time to communicate and teach. Communication and teaching happen when we have listened and learned about people and their world. We can listen and learn by building relationships. We build relationships when we are out of the box. You have no business correcting someone you are in the box with.It has to start with seeing the other person as truly human.        Send us your questions and your thoughts. Let's continue this conversation.  Leave a comment or call/text our 24-hour feedback phone at 530-535-8121. Listen to Part 1 and Part 2 of our conversation with the Sutherlands about leadership and self-deception.Submit a topic for a conversation - https://forms.gle/actLkkKrEHP7pNMZ9 Make more connections with us at https://linktr.ee/lifewiththebrownsSponsor for the show: Sutherland DDS https://sutherlanddds.com/

Special guests, friends, and sponsors, John Scott Sutherland and Shandel Sutherland, of Sutherland DDS, joined us for a discussion about the book Leadership & Self-Deception: Getting Out of the Box by The Arbinger Institute. In this last part of our conversation, we focus on the 4 different boxes we can be in. The box is a scary place to be. When we are in the box towards someone we are the one who misbehaves. We make the other person out to be worse than they really are. We look for evidence that backs up the story we are telling ourselves. We must create evidence in order to remain in our self-deception. It’s scary because as hate rises, we know we are not treating people like humans and we do it anyway.THE 4 BOXES OF SELF-DECEPTIONThe 4 boxes of self-deception are: The Better Than Box: Thinking you are better than others.The I Deserve Box: Thinking you deserve certain things.The Must Be Seen As Box: Thinking that you must be seen a certain way or as a certain kind of person.The Worse Than Box: Thinking that your own problems are worse than anyone else’s, so this is why you can treat people a certain way. You can operate in or out of the box. If you operate inside the box, then you see everything as a problem that someone else created. If you operate outside the box, then you will treat people as humans. FINAL THOUGHTSFirst of all, read the book. It’s Leadership & Self-Deception: Getting Out of the Box by The Arbinger Institute. We highly recommend it. Next, think about the relationships you have with people. Are you in the box in some of those relationships? Get out of the box with people by building relationships with them. If you can’t build a relationship with someone you’re in the box with, then build relationships with the people who are friends with them. Try to understand the person you are in the box with. What is their story? Where are they coming from? Lastly, remember that we shouldn’t be correcting anyone unless we have taken the time to communicate and teach. Communication and teaching happen when we have listened and learned about people and their world. We can listen and learn by building relationships. We build relationships when we are out of the box. You have no business correcting someone you are in the box with.It has to start with seeing the other person as truly human. Send us your questions and your thoughts. Let’s continue this conversation. Leave a comment or call/text our 24-hour feedback phone at 530-535-8121. Listen to Part 1 and Part 2 of our conversation with the Sutherlands about leadership and self-deception.Submit a topic for a conversation - https://forms.gle/actLkkKrEHP7pNMZ9 Make more connections with us at https://linktr.ee/lifewiththebrownsSponsor for the show: Sutherland DDS https://sutherlanddds.com/Support the show (https://www.patreon.com/lifewiththebrowns)

Special guests, friends, and sponsors, John Scott Sutherland and Shandel Sutherland, of Sutherland DDS, joined us for a discussion about the book Leadership & Self-Deception: Getting Out of the Box by The Arbinger Institute. In Part 2 of our conversation, we talked more about what being in the box means and how to get out of it. WHAT DOES IT MEAN TO BE IN THE BOX?First, being in the box of self-deception means you have betrayed yourself. You don't act in ways that you believe are appropriate or are in line with your values. When you are in the box, you don't see another person's humanity. Instead, you only see the wall of the box you're in. Being inside the box keeps you emotionally disconnected from other people. YOU'RE IN THE BOX. NOW WHAT?You have to start with admitting that you are in the box. Once you identify that you're in the box, you will start to understand how you got there and what to do to get out.  It's easy to get comfortable inside our boxes. The more words we speak, the more decorations we put into our box. If you say, “I'm never doing that,” or “That person is so bad,” it's hard to get yourself out of that box. When the person you have criticized then does something good for you, you can't let them out of the box, right? That would be betraying yourself twice. You will have betrayed your values and then betrayed your righteousness in being inside the box.  SELF-JUSTIFICATION AND COLLUSIONSelf-justification and collusion go hand-in-hand. When we justify ourselves, we point fingers and blame others for our problems. We deceive ourselves with collusion in order to continue our self-justification. We invite people to behave badly so that we can justify our own bad behaviors. It's pretty scary because the behavior we say that we dislike in the other person is the behavior we provoke in order to justify our negative view of that person. It is a form of self-deception that keeps us in the box.  HOW TO GET OUT OF THE BOXIt takes hard work and conscious thinking to get out of the boxes we are in. It also takes humility. We must be willing to admit that we are wrong and no one wants to do that. It's hard. It is much easier to point fingers and blame others for our problems.The first thing you should do is ask yourself what you should do for this person. What can you do to treat this person as a fellow human being? As soon as your brain thinks of that humane response, then do it. Yes, you could yell at that person or hit that person. You could do that if they were only an object to you. Do what makes that person human to you. Send us your questions and your thoughts. Let's continue this conversation.  Leave a comment or call/text our 24-hour feedback phone at 530-535-8121. Listen to Part 1 and Part 3 of our conversation with the Sutherlands about leadership and self-deception.Submit a topic for a conversation - https://forms.gle/actLkkKrEHP7pNMZ9 Make more connections with us at https://linktr.ee/lifewiththebrownsSponsor for the show: Sutherland DDS https://sutherlanddds.com/Support the show

Special guests, friends, and sponsors, John Scott Sutherland and Shandel Sutherland, of Sutherland DDS, joined us for a discussion about the book Leadership & Self-Deception: Getting Out of the Box by The Arbinger Institute. In Part 2 of our conversation, we talked more about what being in the box means and how to get out of it. WHAT DOES IT MEAN TO BE IN THE BOX?First, being in the box of self-deception means you have betrayed yourself. You don’t act in ways that you believe are appropriate or are in line with your values. When you are in the box, you don’t see another person’s humanity. Instead, you only see the wall of the box you’re in. Being inside the box keeps you emotionally disconnected from other people. YOU’RE IN THE BOX. NOW WHAT?You have to start with admitting that you are in the box. Once you identify that you’re in the box, you will start to understand how you got there and what to do to get out. It’s easy to get comfortable inside our boxes. The more words we speak, the more decorations we put into our box. If you say, “I’m never doing that,” or “That person is so bad,” it’s hard to get yourself out of that box. When the person you have criticized then does something good for you, you can’t let them out of the box, right? That would be betraying yourself twice. You will have betrayed your values and then betrayed your righteousness in being inside the box. SELF-JUSTIFICATION AND COLLUSIONSelf-justification and collusion go hand-in-hand. When we justify ourselves, we point fingers and blame others for our problems. We deceive ourselves with collusion in order to continue our self-justification. We invite people to behave badly so that we can justify our own bad behaviors. It’s pretty scary because the behavior we say that we dislike in the other person is the behavior we provoke in order to justify our negative view of that person. It is a form of self-deception that keeps us in the box. HOW TO GET OUT OF THE BOXIt takes hard work and conscious thinking to get out of the boxes we are in. It also takes humility. We must be willing to admit that we are wrong and no one wants to do that. It’s hard. It is much easier to point fingers and blame others for our problems.The first thing you should do is ask yourself what you should do for this person. What can you do to treat this person as a fellow human being? As soon as your brain thinks of that humane response, then do it. Yes, you could yell at that person or hit that person. You could do that if they were only an object to you. Do what makes that person human to you. Send us your questions and your thoughts. Let’s continue this conversation. Leave a comment or call/text our 24-hour feedback phone at 530-535-8121. Listen to Part 1 and Part 3 of our conversation with the Sutherlands about leadership and self-deception.Submit a topic for a conversation - https://forms.gle/actLkkKrEHP7pNMZ9 Make more connections with us at https://linktr.ee/lifewiththebrownsSponsor for the show: Sutherland DDS https://sutherlanddds.com/Support the show (https://www.patreon.com/lifewiththebrowns)

Special guests, friends, and sponsors, John Scott Sutherland and Shandel Sutherland, of Sutherland DDS, joined us for a discussion about the book Leadership & Self-Deception: Getting Out of the Box by The Arbinger Institute. In Part 1 of our conversation, we explain what self-deception is and talk about the many ways we deceive ourselves on a daily basis.WHAT IS SELF-DECEPTION?Self-deception is the action or practice of allowing oneself to believe that a false or unvalidated feeling, idea, or situation is true (dictionary.com). One of the ways this manifests itself is by not doing something we know we should do and then justifying our inaction to ourselves. When this occurs, we start to blame the people around us for the problems we perceive. It's resisting the possibility that we are part of the problem.ARE YOU INSIDE THE BOX OF SELF-DECEPTION?These arguments you have with others inside your own head are like putting yourself inside a box. No one but you can know what is going on inside your head. Just because the other person doesn't jump up to get the baby doesn't mean they're lazy or a bad person. Maybe they are a heavy sleeper and can't even hear the baby. Isn't it true that you can get up to take care of the baby too? A civil conversation at another time can help the situation improve.  Self-deception causes us to work and live as if trapped inside a box. We don't see the reality that is around us. (arbingerinstitute.com). It's easy to identify the problems outside of ourselves. But can we get to real solutions if we always are outside the problem and we are pointing fingers at all the ways it should change? This book is empowering because you realize that you can't change other people. You only have the power to change yourself. HOW SELF-DECEPTION OBJECTIFIES OTHERSYou cannot believe something and behave differently. Once you're in the box of self-deception, you make the other person an object. They lose their humanity to you. When they become an object, you can justify yourself and your actions. You can mistreat them. It is easy to belittle people, treat them poorly, and feel justified in doing it when they have lost their humanity. In the end, you don't honor yourself and your values.Giving the silent treatment is an example of self-deception. Think of times in your life when you weren't outright aggressive, but turned silent instead. Did you feel justified in your silence and maybe that you were being kind in not saying something hurtful? Did it feel better to be silent? Did you feel a little self-righteous? We want to hear from you. Do you recognize the times you are deceiving yourself? Does it happen at home or at work? What are some ways you can get yourself out of the box of self-deception?  Send us your questions and your thoughts. Let's continue this conversation.  Leave a comment or call/text our 24-hour feedback phone at 530-535-8121. Listen to Part 2 and Part 3 of our conversation with the Sutherlands about leadership and self-deception.Submit a topic for a conversation - https://forms.gle/actLkkKrEHP7pNMZ9 Make more connections with us at https://linktr.ee/lifewiththebrownsSponsor for the show: Sutherland DDS https://sutherlanddds.com/Support the show

Special guests, friends, and sponsors, John Scott Sutherland and Shandel Sutherland, of Sutherland DDS, joined us for a discussion about the book Leadership & Self-Deception: Getting Out of the Box by The Arbinger Institute. In Part 1 of our conversation, we explain what self-deception is and talk about the many ways we deceive ourselves on a daily basis.WHAT IS SELF-DECEPTION?Self-deception is the action or practice of allowing oneself to believe that a false or unvalidated feeling, idea, or situation is true (dictionary.com). One of the ways this manifests itself is by not doing something we know we should do and then justifying our inaction to ourselves. When this occurs, we start to blame the people around us for the problems we perceive. It’s resisting the possibility that we are part of the problem.ARE YOU INSIDE THE BOX OF SELF-DECEPTION?These arguments you have with others inside your own head are like putting yourself inside a box. No one but you can know what is going on inside your head. Just because the other person doesn’t jump up to get the baby doesn’t mean they’re lazy or a bad person. Maybe they are a heavy sleeper and can’t even hear the baby. Isn’t it true that you can get up to take care of the baby too? A civil conversation at another time can help the situation improve. Self-deception causes us to work and live as if trapped inside a box. We don’t see the reality that is around us. (arbingerinstitute.com). It’s easy to identify the problems outside of ourselves. But can we get to real solutions if we always are outside the problem and we are pointing fingers at all the ways it should change? This book is empowering because you realize that you can’t change other people. You only have the power to change yourself. HOW SELF-DECEPTION OBJECTIFIES OTHERSYou cannot believe something and behave differently. Once you’re in the box of self-deception, you make the other person an object. They lose their humanity to you. When they become an object, you can justify yourself and your actions. You can mistreat them. It is easy to belittle people, treat them poorly, and feel justified in doing it when they have lost their humanity. In the end, you don’t honor yourself and your values.Giving the silent treatment is an example of self-deception. Think of times in your life when you weren’t outright aggressive, but turned silent instead. Did you feel justified in your silence and maybe that you were being kind in not saying something hurtful? Did it feel better to be silent? Did you feel a little self-righteous? We want to hear from you. Do you recognize the times you are deceiving yourself? Does it happen at home or at work? What are some ways you can get yourself out of the box of self-deception? Send us your questions and your thoughts. Let’s continue this conversation. Leave a comment or call/text our 24-hour feedback phone at 530-535-8121. Listen to Part 2 and Part 3 of our conversation with the Sutherlands about leadership and self-deception.Submit a topic for a conversation - https://forms.gle/actLkkKrEHP7pNMZ9 Make more connections with us at https://linktr.ee/lifewiththebrownsSponsor for the show: Sutherland DDS https://sutherlanddds.com/Support the show (https://www.patreon.com/lifewiththebrowns)

Tuesday, March 3, 2020 YouTube. Some will say since every case of depression is different it's no use to try to help people in any broad way with their own depression. It has to be only individual, only by a professional. And professionals are great, when you can afford one and have time for one and when they know what they're doing. But to say that there shouldn't be any broad knowledge about psychology, to say there shouldn't be any DIY psychology, would be like saying there shouldn't be a YouTube for fixing cars. YouTube is great for fixing your own car. Sometimes that's the best option, and it's good for people to be able to do their own stuff if they can and want to. I say it's the same with psychology. Give the power to the people. Don't have to take away professionals, but why feel like the power has to be consolidated in paid professionals when there are so many things a lay person can do him or herself? That's what I say. Just like people can fix their own cars if they want to, let people do their own psychology if they want to. We can do a lot. I'm not saying all of it, all the time, just don't take away our ability to do that. Let knowledge flow freely. ($170 for a DSM book!) Was reading in [a book]. He says since we're actively producing our emotional problems, we can eliminate them at their source. (Through the means discussed in this book.) a few things. You're saying the source is our self betrayal. Is that the source, or is it just an aspect, a necessary ingredient, an essential part of the mechanism, like I'm saying? Then you'd be saying everybody's emotional problems is caused by self-betrayal. You focus on that thing, like it is the sole cause and therefore the sole solution. Don't do that. Then you're stuck, which you are, saying the only thing to do is to stop self-betraying, which is not directly possible) and everything else is futile to do, which is not true. Surely self-betrayal, or to me self-deception and all, is only an essential ingredient, helpful to understand but not necessarily the thing to focus on, or to try to directly do. What can we do? Read the talk Beware of Pride and go through the ways we can humble ourselves. Notice that none of the ways he says are “will yourself to be humble” or “stop being prideful”. We don't do it directly, we do it kind of indirectly. Even Terry Warner says on p 299, “we cannot get ourselves emotionally unstuck no matter how we might try. We cannot do it by denying or repressing our feelings or by willing ourselves to feel differently—feelings are subject to our indirect but not our direct control.” Also, if you say our emotional problems are caused by self betrayal, don't you have to say depression and anxiety are caused by self-betrayal? How can you separate the emotional problems that are higher in degree than others? Thirdly, there are no means discussed in the book, except the two I've said before - the writing exercise and asking forgiveness for failing to forgive. But those two things can be done in the wrong way too, so you're left with nothing. It's tempting to see these insights about self-deception involved in depression and anxiety and think that self deception is the root cause of depression. I would caution against that, and say that it is a necessary part of it, but not the root cause. If you say it is the root cause, what can you do about your emotional problems, except somehow stop self-deceiving? You might not be able to act on that directly, right? The thing you need to focus on may be completely different - forgive the person, pray for the power to forgive (the person or yourself), prepare more, organize better, get more sleep, change your job, do something fun once in a while, enjoy the people you're with, go to the temple more, pray, read the scriptures, go to church, fast, whatever it might be for you. See a therapist, take medication, whatever. Can't all those things help you not be stressed and depressed and therefore stop self-deceiving and self-betraying in that way? (Well medication might be more a treating of the symptoms?) Saturday, Mar 7, 2020 Hmm. When you see how self deception and pride are at the heart of emotional troubles it is natural to think that they are the cause and the solution, right? But something doesn't smell right about that. Like I've said before, those things are just part of the mechanism. Internal combustion. But the reason your car isn't going, while it is true that internal combustion isn't happening correctly, may be something electrical, or gas related, or whatever. You don't do a compression check every time your car stalls. Yes, compression has to be there, but you troubleshoot smarter than that. I hope that analogy is somewhat helpful. I'm just trying to say that while pride, while self-deception, while going against the light (or self-betrayal), while self-justification may be a part of all mental illness and depression and anxiety, surely it is not the proper thing to focus on. Maybe don't lose focus on it, or remember that it's part of it, maybe keep it in mind, but don't necessarily make that the primary cause. A discussion of causality is in order. If you think about it, isn't there no such thing as a single cause for anything? Isn't everything caused, so to speak, by multiple factors? And when we say that something causes another thing we are really saying it is the primary causing factor? The one that stands out, the one we need to pay the most attention to? What caused the airplane to crash? Well a lack of lift, right? Well of course, that goes without saying! But the primary cause, or the one that stands out, the one we should pay attention to, is going to be something different, right? Ice on the wings. A mechanical failure of any number of types. Pilot error of any number of types. An electrical error of any number of types. Analyzing the black box is a whole science (if it has one). Surely so is psychology. It's not just always self-betrayal, or pride, or self-deception. Those things go without saying. Monday, Mar 9, 2020 It's an interesting question, and one worth considering, whether there's a concrete action that can be taken to address the issue, or whether there isn't. Some say that since any concrete action, basically, can be done insincerely, it's basically no use trying. The only action to do is to stop self-betraying. But that's not right, is it! Though it's true that any particular action can basically be done two ways, it doesn't mean you shouldn't do it, if that's what's right for you. The Light of Christ can be your guide, surely! There must be SOMETHING each person can do in each situation to address whatever issue it is, maybe even if the answer sometimes includes being patient. That's what I have to think. Even you say to ask forgiveness for withholding forgiveness. As if that couldn't be done insincerely! Of course it can! And that one other thing you say to do (in the whole book!) - some writing exercise. You have to admit EVERYTHING can be done in 2 ways. Including those 2 things you suggested. So what can we do? Surely the Spirit knows. Surely it is different for each person, and surely there are multiple things a person could possibly do in at least many situations, if not all. A writing exercise. Prayer. Fasting. Address the person. Internally let something go. Exercise. Sleep better. Eat better. Ignore something. Pay attention to something. Remember something. Forget something. SOMETHING. Surely! This deserves some more discussion. And examples. Read your scriptures, go to church, go to the temple, something. Maybe more than one thing. And is it not true that somewhere deep down, we know what to do? Hmm. Might need some help from the Holy Ghost or somebody or reading something to know what that is. But surely we know it somewhere all along. I keep using the term self betrayal, to be compatible with other ideas I'm jumping off from. But I don't love the term. I don't think it's really accurate. It makes the self be the thing that is betrayed, it makes the truth that we go against come from the self. But the truth comes from God. So God betrayal would be more accurate, Or light of Christ betrayal. But then you have the word betrayal too. To betray someone is to do a Judas Iscariot did to Jesus Christ. You are friends with somebody and you turn them over to evil, or something. Anyway it's not the most helpful idea for what we do when we go against the truth. Wednesday, Mar 11, 2020 You gotta admit guys, this is fun! Tuesday, Mar 17, 2020 This question of "what can we do??" is big. Big, big. Turns out we're always talking about that. We're always wondering about it. I know I am, especially. We may not always like the answer. And I think of how people say "just don't worry about it," and how that's not always possible for everybody, or whatever. The answer might be that you can't always escape your problems right away. The thing you can do, or things, might be more indirect and choices made at off-times. Times outside the moment of alarm. We may not like that. I know I don't. Hmm. Again, I think of President Benson's talk "Beware of Pride". Many things we can do, to humble ourselves. Most of them are in the off-moment, if you know what I mean. Outside the moment of great alarm. Wednesday And he doesn't list them as things to do to escape or prevent depression

Tuesday, March 3, 2020 YouTube.  Some will say since every case of depression is different it’s no use to try… Read more 20: Killin Me

Many are chasing love, but they don't love self.

C. Terry Warner, a philosophy professor at Brigham Young University until his retirement, has made unprecedented strides in the area of self-deception, especially as it relates to social interactions. I have seen no one else treat his subject better. Studying self-deception without talking about Terry Warner would be a little like studying physics without talking about Einstein. I am greatly indebted to him for my knowledge in this area and will forever be grateful I was ever able to study under him.

Mercury Retrograde 2/23/13-3/17/13. Please refer to the Website www.LuminanceCoaching.com for the Mercury Retrograde breakdown by Sun Sign. Stay present people, this too shall pass!

My First Astrological Podcast!Wonder why things have been so nutty for the past few days? Mercury is Retrograde again from 11-6-12 thru 11-25-12. Check out this Retro's Rx...