Love Each Other Better

We all experience moments of hurt, frustration, or disappointment in relationship—but how do we address them without making things worse?  How can you talk about the things that bother you in a way that doesn't escalate the conflict or further damage the connection? In this episode, we'll explore the critical difference between intent and impact and why both matter. Most of the time, your partner is probably not trying to hurt you—they're trying to meet a need. But when the impact of their actions does hurt, that still really matters.  When you can talk about both the intent behind their actions AND the impact it had on you, you open up the possibility of not only deepening your understanding and strengthening your bond, but also finding solutions to the challenges in your relationship that genuinely work for both of you.  Tune in to episode 28 for actionable advice that will help you approach those painful moments with clarity, curiosity, and the tools you need to build a stronger + realer relationship, together. Your love story isn't broken—it's just waiting for a deeper, more compassionate conversation.   Resources mentioned in the show Free Mini-Course: The 4 Steps to Stop Any Fight Without Giving In: https://www.AliMillerCoaching.com/freeminicourse Get my free feelings and needs lists: https://www.alimillercoaching.com/feelingsandneeds Apply to join us for the Love Each Other Better: Group Coaching Program for Couples at https://www.alimillercoaching.com/groupprogram Apply for Stop Fighting! Private Coaching Program for Couples at https://www.alimillercoaching.com/stopfighting Book a free consultation call with Ali: https://www.calendly.com/alimillercoaching/45 ~ Connect with me on social media: IG: https://www.instagram.com/alimillercoaching Private Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/nvcforcouples Email me: Ali@AliMillerCoaching.com Website: https://www.alimillercoaching.com  

In this episode I'm so honored to be joined by Vivek Patel of Meaningful Ideas to explore the impact of patriarchy, sexism, and misogyny in heterosexual relationships and how to break free from this toxic conditioning that contributes to so much pain for so many people. Vivek shares his own personal journey of recognizing and unlearning his own sexist conditioning and how this profoundly improved his own marriage. He also offers practical tips for how others can do this, too.  Vivek emphasizes the importance of redefining masculinity, dismantling hierarchical mindsets, and the power of self-compassion to support honest conversations between men and women about the impacts of sexism on their relationships.  Tune in for a raw, real, and inspiring conversation about deprogramming patriarchy, embracing vulnerability, and breaking free from toxic masculinity.   CONNECT WITH VIVEK PATEL Vivek Patel of Meaningful Ideas has been sharing Conscious Parenting concepts for over 15 years. The ideas he shares have been used by thousands of families to create more harmony and connection in their homes. He has written more than 500 parenting articles and created over 300 videos. There is also a book in the works. Vivek cares deeply about empowering parents to develop more harmonious relationships with their kids using a powerful approach called “Non-Coercive, Collaborative Parenting”, based on Communication, Connection, and Collaboration. He is also best friends with his 27 yr old. Check out Vivek's social media @meaningfulideas http://www.facebook.com/meaningfulideas http://www.instagram.com/meaningfulideas https://www.youtube.com/meaningfulideas https://www.twitter.com/meaningfulideas https://www.tiktok.com/@meaningfulideas http://www.meaningfulideas.com If you'd like to receive more personalised and intimate parenting support from Vivek, please consider joining his parenting support group: https://www.meaningfulideas.com/courses/meaningful-ideas-membership Sign up for Vivek's FREE COURSE "Guiding Without Controlling". Registration Link https://meaningfulideas.com/fp/guiding-without-controlling-free-course   CONNECT WITH ALI MILLER Apply to join us for the Love Each Other Better: 6-Month Group Coaching Program for Couples at https://www.alimillercoaching.com/groupprogram Book a free consultation call with Ali: https://www.calendly.com/alimillercoaching/45 Get my free feelings and needs lists: https://www.alimillercoaching.com/feelingsandneeds Connect with me on social media: IG: https://www.instagram.com/alimillercoaching Private Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/nvcforcouples Email me: Ali@AliMillerCoaching.com Website: https://www.alimillercoaching.com

In this insightful episode of the Love Each Other Better Podcast, I'm honored to have a very special guest, relationship expert Maya Diamond. Maya guides us in a deep-dive into the fascinating world of attachment theory. She unravels the complexities of the four primary attachment styles—secure, avoidant, anxious, and fearful avoidant—and explores how our childhood experiences shape the way we connect in adult relationships. Maya shares practical, actionable advice for healing insecure attachment styles, offering listeners valuable tools to foster more secure and fulfilling connections.  Whether you're seeking to understand your own attachment style or improve your relationships, this episode is packed with insights and strategies to build deeper, more meaningful connections. Tune in to learn how to heal childhood wounds, cultivate secure attachments, and communicate effectively for a stronger, healthier partnership! ABOUT MY GUEST Maya Diamond is an expert Dating and Relationship Coach who is known for helping people finally find their beloved after years of trying, so that they can have happy, satisfying, and fulfilling relationships. She specializes in helping people heal their insecure attachment and find healthy secure love. Maya is a trained psychotherapist and holds a Master's Degree in Somatic Psychology from the California Institute of Integral Studies. In 2018, Maya was named one of the best life coaches in San Francisco by Expertise.com. In 2014, she was named one of the Best Relationship Experts in California by DatingAdvice.com. Maya's dating advice has been featured on mindbodygreen.com and elephant journal.com. She shared her message on the TedX stage, with her talk, “The Surprising Key to Building a Healthy Relationship that Lasts.” CONNECT WITH MAYA DIAMOND Go to empowerlove.us/apply to book your free love breakthrough call with Maya Website: empowerlove.us Instagram: mayadiamond.empowerlove Fbook group: https://m.facebook.com/groups/maptolastinglove/?ref=share&mibextid=wwXIfr Podcast: Rewire Your Attachment Style https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/rewire-your-attachment-style-with-maya-diamond/id1499735786 ~ CONNECT WITH ALI MILLER Apply to join us for the Love Each Other Better: 6-Month Group Coaching Program for Couples at https://www.alimillercoaching.com/groupprogram Book a free consultation call with Ali: https://www.calendly.com/alimillercoaching/45 Get my free feelings and needs lists: https://www.alimillercoaching.com/feelingsandneeds Connect with me on social media: IG: https://www.instagram.com/alimillercoaching Private Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/nvcforcouples Email me: Ali@AliMillerCoaching.com Website: https://www.alimillercoaching.com

In this episode we dive into how to communicate assertively without crossing into aggression. I share powerful insights from Nonviolent Communication (NVC) and offer practical tools to help you ask for what you want in a way that empowers you AND strengthens your connection with others. Whether you're navigating conflict with your partner, or just want to communicate more effectively, I've got heart-centered tips to help you create happier, more satisfying relationships. If you've ever wondered how to speak up for yourself without being confrontational, this episode is for you!   Resources Book a free consultation call with Ali: https://www.calendly.com/alimillercoaching/45 Get my free feelings and needs lists: https://www.alimillercoaching.com/feelingsandneeds Connect with me on social media: IG: https://www.instagram.com/alimillercoaching Private Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/nvcforcouples Email me: Ali@AliMillerCoaching.com Website: https://www.alimillercoaching.com

In this episode of Love Each Other Better, I'm thrilled to welcome Roxy Manning, PhD, a psychologist, Nonviolent Communication trainer, and the author of How to Have Anti-Racist Conversations. Together, we explore the concept of the Beloved Community, inspired by Dr. Martin Luther King Jr., and how it ties into Roxy's work and activism. We dive into topics like having authentic and courageous conversations, addressing systems of oppression within families, and navigating how to handle harm in relationships. We also discuss the difference between positive and negative peace, and why being fierce—engaging in “necessary trouble”—is essential for real change. In a special segment, we role-play how to open up a meaningful conversation about patriarchy and sexism within a heterosexual relationship, offering practical tools and approaches for navigating these sensitive yet critical discussions. You won't want to miss Roxy's inspiring vision for a more just and equitable future, along with actionable ways to connect with her transformative work. This is a conversation full of wisdom, heart, and hope!   Connect with my guest, Roxy Mannning, PhD Clinical psychologist, certified trainer with the Center for Nonviolent Communication, and co-host of the podcast Fierce Compassion. As a Black Caribbean immigrant to the US, Roxy Manning brings a unique, intersectional lens to her organizational work, focusing on transforming communication to foster justice and equity. Author of How to Have Antiracist Conversations and coauthor of The Antiracist Heart, her writing provides practical tools for antiracist dialogue and building compassionate communities. Dr. Manning lives in the San Francisco Bay Area, inspiring change internationally through her teachings and writings. Find her books, writing, and podcast at https://www. roxannemanning.com.   Connect with your host, Ali Miller https://www.AliMillerCoaching.com Stop Fighting Private Coaching Program for Couples: https://www.AliMillerCoaching.com/StopFighting https://www.instagram.com/alimillercoaching https://www.facebook.com/groups/nvcforcouples Ali@AliMillerCoaching.com

Welcome to a special New Year's episode! As we say goodbye to 2024 and look ahead to 2025, I'm diving into the idea of Relationship Resolutions. Whether it's your partner, kids, friends, coworkers, or even yourself, the relationships in our lives shape so much of our joy and fulfillment. In this episode, I share simple, practical ideas for strengthening those connections in meaningful ways. Using insights from Nonviolent Communication (NVC), I'll guide you through reflection and goal-setting so you can show up with more intention, communicate more clearly, and build relationships that truly enrich your life. Let's reflect on the past year, dream big for the next one, and take small, actionable steps toward making 2025 your best year yet. Resources List of Universal Human Needs/Values: https://www.alimillercoaching.com/feelingsandneeds Private Coaching Program for Couples: https://www.alimillercoaching.com/stopfighting Small Group Coaching Program for Couples: https://www.alimillercoaching.com/groupcoachingprogram Website: https://www.alimillercoaching.com Email: Ali@AliMillerCoaching.com Private Facebook Group: NVC for Couples: https://www.facebook.com/groups/nvcforcouples Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/alimillercoaching Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/alimillercoaching

In this thought-provoking episode of the Love Each Other Better podcast, I sit down with Jen Lumanlan, host of the Your Parenting Mojo podcast and author of Parenting Beyond Power: How to Use Connection & Collaboration to Transform Your Family and the World. Join us for an introduction to how white supremacy, patriarchy, and capitalism shape family dynamics and influence parenting approaches, and how to shift out of traditional power dynamics to make family life easier and more connecting. Jen shares powerful insights and practical tools to help parents navigate conflicts and create family environments where everyone's needs—parents' and children's alike—are honored. From addressing the micro moments where resistance in children shows up to exploring deep concepts like white supremacy, patriarchy, and capitalism and how they intersect in our families, this episode offers a roadmap for transforming family relationships and beyond. Whether you're a parent seeking to navigate the pressures of modern life or someone looking to create a more just and collaborative family dynamic, this episode is packed with inspiration and actionable strategies. Tune in and start building a family culture rooted in equality, trust, and compassion today.   About Jen Lumanlan JEN LUMANLAN, MS, MEd, (she/her) hosts the Your Parenting Mojo podcast, which was named Best Research-Based Parenting Podcast by Lifehacker and has been downloaded almost 4 million times. After attending Berkeley and Yale and following a traditional career path in sustainability consulting, Jen found that parenting was her toughest challenge yet. She went back to school for a master's degree in psychology focused on child development and another in education, and trained as a Co-Active coach to share what she learned with other parents. Her work has been featured in outlets such as Psychology Today, Romper, and NPR. Jen is the author of Parenting Beyond Power: How to Use Connection and Collaboration to Transform Your Family - and the World. Jen's Resources Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/YourParentingMojo Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/yourparentingmojo/ Website: https://www.yourparentingmojo.com Take Jen's quiz: Tell Me What My Child Needs! https://www.yourparentingmojo.com/quiz When you understand your child's most important need and meet that more often, they'll stop resisting you as much. Read Jen's book: Parenting Beyond Power: How to Use Connection & Collaboration to Transform Your Family and the World: https://yourparentingmojo.com/book/ Listen to Jen's podcast: Your Parenting Mojo: https://yourparentingmojo.com/episodes/ Setting Loving (& Effective!) Limits workshop (open anytime; just $7 with coupon code ALIMILLER) - shows you how to set limits effectively, and also set far fewer of them than you ever thought possible, without being a permissive parent! Taming Your Triggers workshop (opens every ~Oct and Feb) - helps parents understand the real causes of their triggered feelings, begin to heal those hurts so they feel triggered less often, and repair more effectively on the fewer occasions when it does still happen. Parenting Membership (opens every May) - provides ongoing support for parenting challenges - from tantrums/meltdowns, screen time, and raising healthy eaters to getting on the same page with your parenting partner.   Connect with Ali Miller Stop Fighting! (without stuffing your feelings or sacrificing your needs) 8-Week Private Coaching Program for Couples: https://www.alimillercoaching.com/stopfighting Website: https://www.AliMillerCoaching.com Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/alimillercoaching NVC for Couples Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/nvcforcouples/ Email: Ali@AliMillerCoaching.com    

In Episode 21 of the Love Each Other Better podcast, I'm joined by clinical psychologist,  neuropsychologist, and certified parenting coach, Dr. Gila, to explore self-regulation strategies and their transformative impact on intimate relationships. Dr. Gila is a master at simplifying complex concepts in interpersonal neurobiology while providing practical, actionable tools for managing emotional stress so we can thrive in our relationships.  In this illuminating episode that is infused with compassion, Dr. Gila discusses the importance of self-awareness, daily self-care practices, and how to effectively navigate moments of emotional overwhelm. You'll gain insights into the fight-flight-freeze response, what happens when we "flip our lids," practical ways to pause and reconnect, and how to strengthen emotional resilience within relationships. Tune in for science-based strategies, compassionate expert advice, and empowering tools to love each other better—even in the toughest moments.   ~ Dr. Gila (she/her) is a Jai-certified parent coach and certified Clini-Coach®, in addition to being a clinical psychologist and neuropsychologist. Most importantly, she's a single mom. Dr. Gila specializes in single parenting with connection, not perfection. She is passionate about helping single parents build healthy relationships with their kids AND themselves, through workshops, individual coaching, and her group program, The SingleParentology™ Lab. Her motto is: Even if you're on your own, you don't have to do it alone! Connect with Dr. Gila! COACHING: Dr. Gila Parenting Website: www.drgilaparenting.com   Email: info@drgilaparenting.com IG: www.instagram.com/drgila_parenting FB: www.facebook.com/drgilaparenting/   Free resources:  PDF GUIDE: Tantrums, & Meltdowns, & Rages...Oh My! The single parent's guide to understanding challenging behaviors (https://www.drgilaparenting.com/SP_tantrum_signup) AUDIO: Guided Meditation for Single Parents (https://www.drgilaparenting.com/SP_meditation) VIDEO: What Every Parent Needs to Know When the S**T Hits the Fan. (https://www.drgilaparenting.com/3truths)   THERAPY: GZR Psychology Services, PLLC * Website: www.gzrpsychology.com * Email: info@gzrpsychology.com * Phone: 914-292-3978 * Location: Fully virtual. NYS residents only. * Insurance: Private pay. Superbills offered where appropriate.   Connect with Ali Miller Stop Fighting! (without stuffing your feelings or sacrificing your needs) Private Coaching Program for Couples: https://www.alimillercoaching.com/stopfighting https://www.AliMillerCoaching.com https://www.instagram.com/alimillercoaching Ali@AliMillerCoaching.com  

In this enlightening episode I'm joined by Sarah Peyton, a renowned neuroscience educator, author, and certified Nonviolent Communication trainer. We delve into the fascinating intersection of neuroscience and Nonviolent Communication, unpacking how our understanding of trauma, nervous system states, and attachment styles can profoundly influence our relationships. Key Topics Include: The neuroscience of attachment styles and their impact on relationships How trauma affects emotional regulation and relational dynamics The role of Nonviolent Communication in fostering secure attachments Insights into different attachment styles and their significance The healing potential of emotional accompaniment in relationships Practical resources for those struggling with relationship challenges Whether you're seeking to deepen your connections or navigate relationship hurdles, this episode highlights the transformative power of both understanding the neuroscience of relationships and practicing Nonviolent Communication to enhance relational dynamics and emotional well-being. Tune in for an inspiring conversation that equips you with the tools we all need to love each other better! RESOURCES Sarah Peyton's resources Website: https://www.sarahpeyton.com Go to https://www.sarahpeyton.com and press the Start Healing Now button to receive the free guided meditations Sarah mentioned in this episode Facebook https://www.facebook.com/empathybrain/ Youtube https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCPJ_wotaL-ZoZefuLdgEGkQ Instagram https://www.instagram.com/sarahpeytonauthor/ Linked In https://www.linkedin.com/in/sarah-peyton-5979903   Ali Miller's resources **Small Group Coaching Program for Couples** https://www.alimillercoaching.com/groupcoachingprogram Website: https://www.AliMillerCoaching.com    FREE Mini-Course for Couples: The 4 Steps to Stop Any Fight Without Giving In https://www.alimillercoaching.com/freeminicourse Instagram https://www.instagram.com/alimillercoaching Facebook https://www.facebook.com/alimillercoaching

  How do you keep the spark alive with your partner when life feels like a never-ending to-do list? In this very special episode, you get to be a fly on the wall as I sit down with Noelle and Frank, a married couple caught in the familiar struggle of staying emotionally and physically connected amid the demands of modern family life. Through live, real-time coaching, we: Uncover the hidden assumptions, miscommunication, and unmet needs creating distance between them. Use Nonviolent Communication (NVC) tools to clear up misunderstandings and foster deeper empathy. Craft a practical, personalized plan to reconnect in ways that truly work for each of them. You'll witness firsthand how this NVC-based coaching helped Noelle and Frank move from frustration to clarity—from feeling stuck to having a solid action plan for lasting connection. Join us for an unfiltered, heartfelt conversation about how to nurture love, intimacy, and understanding when your relationship is buried under logistics and obligations. Because thriving partnerships don't happen by chance—they're built intentionally, one heart-centered conversation at a time.   Resources Stop Fighting! (without stuffing your feelings and sacrificing your needs): 8-Week Private Coaching Program for Couples: https://www.AliMillerCoaching.com/StopFighting Ali's website: https://www.AliMillerCoaching.com Would you like to get coached on the podcast? Email Ali@AliMillerCoaching.com to express your interest and Ali will get back to you soon!    

In this inspiring episode, we explore the nuances of ethical non-monogamy (ENM) with Dr. Rachael Meir, addressing common questions and concerns about polyamory, open relationships, and other forms of ethical/consensual non-monogamy. Dr. Meir breaks down the distinctions between terms like ENM and polyamory, explaining how ENM serves as an umbrella concept for a variety of relationship dynamics. We delve into how to create mutually satisfying agreements, manage complex emotions like jealousy, and ensure clear communication within non-monogamous relationships. Drawing from her expertise in relationships and personal experience, Dr. Meir offers practical insights on how to approach ENM thoughtfully—whether you're exploring it for the first time or already practicing it. We also discuss how non-monogamous relationships challenge the idea that one partner should meet all of our emotional and physical needs and how embracing individual autonomy within partnerships can lead to more fulfilling connections. For those feeling curious but cautious or wondering how to navigate conversations about opening up a relationship, or succeeding in your already-established non-monogamous relationships, this episode offers valuable guidance. Tune in as we address listener questions and explore how to create ethical, transparent, and consent-driven agreements in non-monogamous relationships. Guest expert bio and links Dr. Rachael Meir is a licensed Clinical Psychologist and a Certified Clinical Sexuality Coach with over 15 years of experience in the field. She earned her PsyD (Doctorate of Psychology) from the PGSP-Stanford PsyD Consortium and BA from the University of Colorado, Boulder. Dr. Meir is sex-positive, LGBTQIA+ affirming, BDSM/kink aware and she specializes in ethical/consensual non-monogamy, including swinging, open relationships, polyamory, and other alternative relationships and lifestyles. As a bisexual woman living in a polyamorous triad relationship herself, she is dedicated to helping people navigate the challenges of opening their relationships and successfully sustaining multiple sexual and romantic partnerships. https://www.drrachaelmeir.com/ https://www.instagram.com/drrachaelmeircoaching/ https://www.facebook.com/drrachaelmeircoaching https://www.tiktok.com/@triadandtrue https://www.drrachaelmeir.com/resourcelist

In this episode, we dive into the hard-to-admit but common feeling of "hating" your spouse. What does it really mean when those emotions surface, and where do they come from? We'll explore the dysfunctional communication patterns—like criticism, contempt, and defensiveness—that often fuel resentment and emotional distance in relationships. More importantly, we'll break down how unmet needs can drive those patterns and offer practical ways to interrupt the cycle, rebuild trust, and reconnect with your partner. If you've ever felt stuck in a negative dynamic, this episode is for you. Tune in to discover how to shift from conflict to collaboration, and start healing the disconnect. Resources: Stop Fighting! (without stuffing your feelings or sacrificing your needs) 8-Week Private Coaching Program for Couples: https://www.alimillercoaching.com/stopfighting Free Feelings and Needs lists: https://www.alimillercoaching.com/feelingsandneeds The 4 Steps to Stop Any Fight without Giving In: Free Mini-Course: https://www.alimillercoaching.com/feelingsandneeds Book a call! www.calendly.com/alimillercoaching/45  

In this episode we're diving into the most common and critical mistake couples make—and it's not what you might think. Join me to explore why waiting until your relationship is in crisis before seeking support can be a recipe for heartbreak. I'll share insights from over two decades of working with couples, revealing the patterns that lead to thriving partnerships and those that struggle to survive. We'll break down the importance of proactive relationship support, normalizing the need for it long before things reach a breaking point. Whether you're early on in your relationship, newlyweds, expecting or current parents, or empty-nesters, this episode will inspire you to enhance your relationship skills now, rather than waiting until it's too late. Through this conversation, I aim to shift the narrative around couples therapy and couples coaching, encouraging you to see it as a powerful tool for growth and connection, not just a last resort. Tune in to learn how the skills taught in Nonviolent Communication can be a game-changer for your relationship, helping you and your partner communicate better, navigate conflict with compassion, and ultimately, love each other better. Links Book a Call: Schedule a no-pressure consult call with Ali to talk about how you can get your relationship from where it is to where you want it to be --> www.calendly.com/alimillercoaching/45-minute-consultation Stop Fighting! (without stuffing your feelings or sacrificing your needs): 8-Week Private Coaching Program for Couples --> www.alimillercoaching.com/stopfighting Email me: ali@alimillercoaching.com  

This episode is a bit different from my usual focus on romantic relationships, as I dive into the parent-child dynamic. While today's discussion is tailored for parents, the principles I'll explore are just as applicable to your relationship with your partner or anyone you spend time with, making this episode valuable for everyone. As a mom to a four-year-old, parenting has become a central part of my life, prompting me to seek out resources and support that align with my values. After attending a recent parenting summit, I felt compelled to share insights on enhancing our relationships with our children through the lens of Nonviolent Communication (NVC). In this episode, we'll delve into the essence of NVC that has become my anchor in parenting: collaborative problem-solving. We'll discuss how collaboration, rooted in the core NVC principle that everyone's needs matter, can transform our decision-making processes and strengthen our bonds with our kids. By prioritizing a collaborative mindset, we can move away from the traditional "power-over" mode and create an environment where our children's voices are heard and valued. Whether you're navigating everyday decisions like what to eat for a snack or more significant choices like schooling options, embracing collaboration can help ensure that all needs are considered. I'll share personal stories and practical strategies on how to slow down, lean into moments of disagreement, and foster a family dynamic where everyone's needs are honored. Join me as to explore how this approach not only empowers our children but also lays the foundation for healthier, more connected relationships across the board. Even if you don't have kids, the principles I discuss will resonate with anyone looking to improve their communication and relationship skills. Tune in to discover how embracing a collaborative mindset can help us all love each other better. And don't forget to share your thoughts and experiences in my private Facebook group, NVC for Couples: Transform Your Relationship One Conversation at a Time, or message me on Instagram @alimillercoaching. I can't wait to hear from you!   Resources Join my private Facebook Group, NVC for Couples: Transform Your Relationship One Conversation at a Time: www.facebook.com/groups/nvcforcouples Follow or message me on Instagram: www.instagram.com/alimillercoaching

In episode 14, "Client Spotlight: Margot and Dan," I have something truly special for you. This is my first episode featuring a real, live couple who have been coaching clients of mine. Margot and Dan sat down with me to share their journey, experiences, and the transformative impact of NVC and coaching on their relationship. In this episode, you'll hear firsthand about the challenges they've overcome, the skills they've honed, and the growth they've achieved together. They even demonstrate some of the communication techniques they've been practicing as they work through a real issue, offering a glimpse into the practical side of couples coaching and what you'll learn to do if you work with me. I'm thrilled to introduce you to these two amazing individuals and share their inspiring story with you. This is an episode you won't want to miss! Resources Stop Fighting! (without stuffing your feelings or sacrificing your needs) 8-Week Private Coaching Program for Couples: www.alimillercoaching.com/stopfighting

Have you ever found yourself overwhelmed by anger and wondered what's truly fueling it? In today's episode, “What's Underneath Your Anger?”, I dive deep into a cathartic experience I just had that unveiled the tender feelings lurking beneath my own anger.  Join me as I explore the vulnerable emotions that often underlie anger, such as stress, fear, guilt, and helplessness. I'll share how a powerful song led me to an emotional release, uncovering the fear that had been fueling my anger for years. This revelation didn't just bring me personal healing—it also brought relational healing by transforming my understanding of others' anger, including my ex-partner's. Discover how embracing and getting curious about our anger can lead to profound self-empathy and empathy for others. I'll provide practical tips and exercises to help you identify the vulnerable feelings beneath your anger, fostering greater compassion and connection in your relationships. Tune in to learn how you can turn conflict into connection by addressing the feelings beneath your anger, and hear about my personal journey towards healing and understanding. Don't miss out on this transformative episode! Episode Highlights: The tender feelings that often lie beneath anger My emotional breakthrough and how it reshaped my perspective of my ex-partner A practical exercise to explore the feelings under your anger How to transform anger into empathy and connection in your relationships Links and Resources: The Keep Going Song by The Bengsons on YouTube Free feelings list: www.alimillercoaching.com/feelingsandneeds Join our Facebook group: NVC for Couples: Transform Your Relationship One Conversation at a Time Learn about my Private Coaching Program for Couples: www.alimillercoaching.com/stopfighting If this episode resonates with you, I'd love to hear your thoughts and experiences. Let's get curious about what's underneath our anger and start healing together.  

Welcome to today's enlightening episode, "From Reactive to Responsive: The Key to Transforming Your Relationship." There's a timeless quote, often attributed to Viktor Frankl, that encapsulates the essence of our discussion: "Between stimulus and response, there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom." Have you ever felt the sting of regret after reacting impulsively to a loved one? Do you yearn for the freedom to respond with calm and clarity instead of reflexively lashing out? You're not alone. Many of us crave the ability to navigate our emotions and interactions more mindfully. In this episode, we'll explore how we can shift from reacting out of habit to responding with intention, especially in the heat of the moment. We'll delve into the profound impact of finding that crucial space between stimulus and response, and how it can transform our relationships and personal growth. We'll draw from the tools of Nonviolent Communication (NVC) to guide us in this transformation. Learn practical steps to slow down, identify your thoughts and feelings, and understand your needs and those of your partner. Discover how to make empowered requests that foster connection and mutual understanding. Join me as I share personal stories (including moments of my own reactivity that led to regret), and discuss the powerful journey towards becoming more responsive. This episode is packed with insights and actionable advice to help you build stronger, more loving relationships. Ready to transform your interactions and embrace a more mindful approach to communication? Tune in and discover the freedom that comes from choosing your response. If this resonates with you and you're eager to stop fighting and start loving better, check out my eight-week private coaching program for couples at www.AliMillerCoaching.com/StopFighting. Spots are limited, so don't wait to apply. Life is short, and love is precious—let's make every moment count. Resources Feelings and Needs Lists: www.AliMillerCoaching.com/feelingsandneeds Stop Fighting! (without stuffing your feelings or sacrificing your needs) 8-Week Private Coaching Program for Couples: www.AliMillerCoaching.com/StopFighting  

In this episode, we're diving into something many couples struggle with: breaking the cycle of recurring fights. If you and your partner find yourselves stuck in the same argument loop, this episode is for you. Brought to you by my new eight-week private coaching program for couples, "Stop Fighting Without Stuffing Your Feelings or Sacrificing Your Needs," this episode offers a glimpse into transformative techniques that can change the way you communicate and resolve conflicts. If what you hear resonates, head over to AliMillerCoaching.com/StopFighting to learn more about how my program can help your relationship thrive. As a couples therapist and coach, I've seen the frustration couples face when they can't move past their conflicts. Being stuck in a cycle of disconnection, especially with someone you love deeply, can be excruciating. In this episode, I share three unconventional ways to help you get unstuck and start resolving your relationship issues effectively. You'll be able to apply these tools right away, and see what a huge difference they make.  These tips are part of the comprehensive toolbox I provide in my coaching program, designed to teach couples exactly how to navigate conflicts from start to finish in a connecting, compassionate, and collaborative way.  Ready to Transform Your Relationship? If you're ready to stop repeating the same fights and start loving each other better, listen to this episode and consider applying for my exclusive private coaching program for couples. Spots are limited, so don't wait! Visit www.AliMillerCoaching.com/StopFighting to apply. Tune in, take notes, and start your journey towards a healthier, happier relationship today. Let's stop fighting and start loving each other better. Resources Stop Fighting! without stuffing your feelings or sacrificing your needs: 8-Week Coaching Program for Couples: www.AliMillerCoaching.com/StopFighting

Join us in this profound episode of Love Each Other Better as we delve into the transformative power of Nonviolent Communication (NVC) within the autism community and beyond. My guest, Bob Yamtich, a seasoned NVC teacher and former Marriage and Family Therapist who has worked extensively with the autism community, shares insights into the beauty of needs awareness and its profound impact on relationships.  Bob's journey intertwines personal growth with professional experience, offering a unique perspective on the intersection of neurodiversity and communication. Bob's work coaching and teaching NVC reflects a deep commitment to fostering self-connection, creativity, and shared empowerment. In this episode, Bob reflects on his experiences working with diverse neurotypes, particularly within the autism community. He highlights the importance of needs consciousness, emphasizing that needs—universal, flexible, and inherently beautiful—are at the core of connecting across neurotypes. Bob challenges common misconceptions about empathy and flexibility within the autism community, advocating for a deeper understanding of "special needs" and how empowerment comes from understanding the difference between needs and strategies. Through this heartfelt conversation between friends/colleagues, PLUS a powerful roleplay, Bob and Ali demonstrate how connecting at the needs level cultivates empathy, mutual respect, and win-win solutions, bridging allistic and autistic perspectives. Tune in to discover practical strategies for navigating relationship dynamics, especially where neurodivergence is in the mix. Learn how embracing needs awareness fosters resilience, trust, and harmony in our most cherished relationships. Join us on this enriching journey toward deeper connection and understanding through the lens of Nonviolent Communication.   Resources Bob Yamtich: www.bobyamtich.org -->Contact Bob through his website to receive his Self-Connection Coloring Book Feelings and Needs Lists: www.alimillercoaching.com/feelingsandneeds Stop Fighting! (without stuffing your feelings or sacrificing your needs) Private Coaching Program for Couples: www.alimillercoaching.com/stopfighting  

In this episode, I dive into a common critique of Nonviolent Communication (NVC): that it feels robotic, formal, inauthentic, and unnatural. Have you encountered this criticism before, or do you share these feelings yourself? Or maybe your partner has said this? NVC is a powerful framework for communication and conflict resolution, but some struggle with its structured approach, particularly the self-expression component involving observations, feelings, needs, and requests. Let's unpack this criticism and explore why it's SO worth embracing the initial awkwardness of NVC. Yes, NVC can feel awkward and unnatural initially, but consider the alternative: fruitless fights, simmering resentment, and unhappy relationships. NVC, with its radically heart-centered approach, offers a path to deeper connection, understanding, and mutual fulfillment. Join me as we explore how NVC can open hearts and transform relationships. Let's embrace the unfamiliar and discover how to love each other better. For personalized support in applying NVC to your relationship, explore my new Private Coaching Program for Couples at www.alimillercoaching.com/stopfighting. Email me Ali@AliMillerCoaching.com with any questions or feedback about this episode - I'd love to hear from you!

One of the most inspiring parts about Nonviolent Communication for me is how it helps people connect across differences. But let's be honest: there are some differences that are harder to navigate than others, and that's why I'm devoting an entire episode to this one.  Picture this: Partner A is dissatisfied with an aspect of the relationship and attempts to discuss it with Partner B. However, Partner B responds with some variation of “I don't want to talk about it.” How do you begin to navigate a difference like this if one partner isn't willing to talk about it? Join me as I explore and shed light on this common relationship dynamic where one partner is eager to address issues while the other is hesitant to engage in conversations. Together we will explore the emotions and needs that might be at play in this challenging situation, without casting blame on either partner.  Whether you're the partner yearning to discuss and resolve issues or the one who doesn't want to talk about it, this episode offers valuable insights and tips to navigate this tricky terrain with empathy and compassion.  Tune in to learn how to connect across differences, including one as challenging as this.    Resources Download your free list of Universal Human Needs at www.alimillercoaching.com/feelingsandneeds Book a free 30-minute consult call with me at www.calendly.com/alimillercoaching/30  Email me your thoughts and questions: Ali@AliMillerCoaching.com        

In this thought-provoking episode I interview NVC trainer, Mary Goyer, about one of the most challenging topics for couples to talk about openly: sex. Why is it so hard to discuss sex openly, compassionately, and connectedly, and how can Nonviolent Communication help us through this so we can have the amazing sex lives we long for? Exploring various barriers to communication, Mary addresses societal conditioning, individual traumas, and limiting beliefs surrounding sexuality. From systemic challenges to personal experiences of trauma, we examine how these factors contribute to the difficulty of expressing one's desires and needs in intimate relationships.  Throughout the episode, Mary shares practical strategies based in Nonviolent Communication to support us all in having more satisfying sex lives. We cover a wide range of topics, including how to address judgments, how to negotiate differences in preferences, and how consent can be hot.  Worried that talking about sex will kill the vibe? Don't worry! We address that head on, and show you how it can actually have the opposite effect. Join us as we challenge societal norms, break down communication barriers, and empower couples to embrace open, honest, connecting conversations about sex and intimacy. Whether you're new to NVC or a seasoned practitioner, this episode offers valuable guidance for enhancing connection and satisfaction in your sex life. Resources Mary Goyer, featured guest: 1. Grok Cards: www.groktheworld.com >>Get your free feelings and needs starter kit or purchase any products for 10% off by entering discout code: AliMiller10 2. www.MaryGoyer.com Host info: Free feelings and needs lists: www.AliMillerCoaching.com/feelingsandneeds I'd love to hear from you! Email me at Ali@AliMillerCoaching.com    

Welcome to Episode 6 of the Love Each Other Better podcast, where we dive deep into the complexities of relationships with compassion and understanding. Today, we're tackling a topic that's essential for anyone navigating the ups and downs of love: the art of the authentic apology. In every relationship, there are bound to be moments where we inadvertently hurt our partner, whether it's through our words or actions. But simply saying "sorry" isn't always enough to mend the rift. In fact, sometimes it can even make things worse if the apology lacks sincerity or fails to address the underlying issues. So how do we apologize in a way that truly heals and strengthens our connection with our partner? That's what we'll explore in today's episode. We'll start by delving into the concept of self-forgiveness, understanding the needs that drove our behavior, and acknowledging the impact of our actions on our partner. From there, we'll learn the key ingredients of an authentic apology, including listening empathetically to our partner's perspective, expressing genuine remorse, and offering insight into our motivations without making excuses. If you've ever struggled to find the right words to apologize to your partner, or if you've been on the receiving end of an apology that fell short, this episode is for you. Join me as I show you how to apologize in a way that fosters understanding, compassion, and ultimately, deeper connection in your relationships. And remember, if you're seeking personalized guidance and support in navigating your relationship challenges, don't hesitate to reach out. I'm here to help you and your partner love each other better. Email me at Ali@AliMillerCoaching.com. Resources: Learn how to Navigate Conflict with Confidence & Care: www.alimillercoaching.com/navigateconflict Download my free list of Universal Human Needs: www.alimillercoaching.com/feelingsandneeds Book a free 30-minute call with Ali: www.calendly.com/alimillercoaching/30  

In this illuminating episode, we delve deep into the heart of conflict within relationships. In my work with hundreds of couples I've noticed a common thread that keeps couples stuck in endless cycles of conflict: they're stuck in what I call "courtroom mentality," where both people are putting all their energy into trying to prove who is in the right and who is in the wrong. And this never leads anywhere helpful.  Join me as I unpack the real roots of relationship discord and discover the transformative power of focusing on needs over all else. Through engaging anecdotes based on actual clients and practical insights, we'll explore how to shift from a winner-loser mindset to one of win-win through connection, ultimately paving the way for deeper intimacy and harmony in your relationships. If you're tired of feeling stuck in conflict and yearn for greater understanding and connection with your partner, this episode is a must-listen. Tune in and embark on a journey toward healing, empathy, and true relationship satisfaction.   RESOURCES: I have two gifts for you! Comprehensive list of Universal Human Needs:  www.alimillercoaching.com/feelingsandneeds Book a free 30-minute call with me to make a custom plan for how you and your partner can love each other better: www.calendly.com/alimillercoaching/30    

In this episode, I dive into a topic that's crucial for fostering peace and connection in your relationships: How to Get Your Partner to Change. Now, I know what you're thinking – isn't trying to change your partner futile? We've all heard that the only person you can change is yourself. But let's be real: most of us find ourselves wanting our partners to change certain behaviors, especially when those behaviors impact us. In this episode, I explore how Nonviolent Communication (NVC) can support you in navigating this delicate territory without resorting to nagging, complaining, demanding, or threatening. Drawing on examples from my own relationships and those of listeners and clients, I share practical strategies to communicate effectively and foster understanding. In this episdoe I discuss: The importance of shamelessly accepting your own desires for your partner to change. How to identify and articulate your feelings and needs surrounding your partner's behavior. Approaching the conversation with curiosity rather than criticism. Understanding your partner's perspective and the needs driving their behavior. The power of connection and empathy in facilitating meaningful change. Join me as I explore how to shift from adversaries to allies in the journey toward growth and connection in your relationship.  Resources ~Want individualized support with your unique relationship? I've got you. Schedule a free 30-minute call to get a customized plan for how to get your relationship from where it is to where you want it to be. Book your free call at www.calendly.com/alimillercoaching/30 ~Get your free lists of feelings and needs at www.alimillercoaching.com/feelingsandneeds ~Email your thoughts and ideas to ali@alimillercoaching.com or DM me on Instagram @alimillercoaching. I'm here to support you in creating the loving, fulfilling relationship you desire.    

Welcome to Episode 3 of the Love Each Other Better podcast! In this third installment of my 3-part Crash Course in Nonviolent Communication, I delve into the transformative power of listening as an act of love. In a world where communication often revolves around speaking, listening tends to take a backseat. But listening is not just about waiting for your turn to speak—it's about truly understanding and connecting with your partner's heart. Join me to explore why listening is the key to ending conflicts and fostering deeper intimacy in relationships. Discover practical tips for becoming an empathic listener, even in the heat of an argument. Through personal anecdotes, client reports, and insights from Nonviolent Communication, we uncover the profound impact of empathic listening on creating lasting bonds and resolving conflicts peacefully. So if you're tired of the same old arguments and longing for more connection in your relationship, tune in now and learn how one simple shift in listening can make all the difference.   Resources: Hearing Each Other's Hearts: Nonviolent Communication Essentials for Couples private workshop with Ali Miller: https://www.alimillermft.com/nvc-for-couples Free lists of Feelings/Emotions and Universal Human Needs: www.alimillercoaching.com/feelingsandneeds Contact your host, Ali Miller: Ali@AliMillerCoaching.com

In Episode 2 of our Crash Course on Nonviolent Communication, we delve into the transformative concept of moving beyond blame. Join me, your host, as we explore how to navigate conflicts with compassion, focusing on understanding our own needs and those of our loved ones. Today, we take a closer look at a core principle of Nonviolent Communication (NVC): every act of violence, including blame, is an attempt to meet unmet needs. Discover the power of redirecting your attention from blame to the underlying needs, transforming conflicts into opportunities for connection. I share personal insights and experiences, illustrating how NVC can be applied in real-life situations, particularly in the realm of romantic relationships. Drawing inspiration from a children's book, "Keyana Loves Her Friend," we explore the simplicity of heart-centered communication. Learn how naming and expressing vulnerable feelings can bridge the gap between conflict and connection. As we break down the mechanics of the NVC model, including the 4-step process (Observation, Feeling, Need, Request), you'll gain practical insights into expressing yourself without blame.  Discover the liberating third way beyond forceful blame and silent withdrawal, and explore the potential for inner transformation and effective communication as we lay the groundwork for future episodes. Join me in this journey towards more compassionate and heart-centered connections. Tune in, reflect on your own tendencies in relationships, and explore the profound shift that occurs when we prioritize understanding needs over looking for fault. If you find this podcast valuable, please take a moment to rate and review it, helping us spread the message of love and effective communication. Thank you for being part of the Love Each Other Better community.  Resources: To access the free lists of feelings and universal human needs referenced near the end of the episode, go to www.AliMillerCoaching.com/feelingsandneeds

Welcome to the inaugural episode of the "Love Each Other Better" podcast, hosted by Ali Miller, a seasoned licensed marriage and family therapist and certified coach specializing in couples communication and conflict resolution. In this episode, Ali introduces the core theme of the podcast: how Nonviolent Communication (NVC) helps us love ourselves and each other better. Drawing inspiration from her extensive experience and training, Ali shares insights and tools from NVC to help couples not just survive but thrive in their relationships. Whether you're currently in a relationship, aspire to be in one, or simply want to enhance your communication skills, this episode is a valuable resource. Join Ali on a journey to explore the depths of Nonviolent Communication as she dedicates the first few episodes to a crash course in NVC. Discover what NVC is, why it's often misunderstood because of its name, and why Ali is passionate about spreading these essential tools to every human being on the planet. If you want to create more love, understanding, and connection in your relationships, tune in and start your journey toward "Loving Each Other Better."  To access the free lists of feelings and universal human needs referenced near the end of the episode, go to www.AliMillerCoaching.com/feelingsandneeds Spread the love! Please rate and review this new podcast so more people will find it. Thank you!        

Welcome to the Love Each Other Better podcast! I'm your host, Ali Miller, and for over 20 years I've been helping people love themselves and each other better. As a Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist and Certified Couples Communication Coach, on this podcast I will be sharing with you transformational tools and principles from Nonviolent Communication (NVC), which I've been practicing and sharing with my clients and students for the past two decades. These are practical, learnable, life-changing tools that will help you in every aspect of your life. My focus here will mainly be on helping you level up your communication and conflict resolution skills so you and your partner can ditch the arguing and love each other better.  Don't be surprised if your entire perspective on your life and relationships starts to change as you listen to this podcast - this isn't the place to come if you want to stay the same. Radical transformation is not only possible for you here, but extremely likely if you apply what you learn here to your unique relationship.  Want to see real improvements in your relationship? Here's what to do: Subscribe to this “Love Each Other Better” podcast, tune in weekly, try out each week's tips, and watch how your relationship grows.  For more support: *Grab my free mini-course: The 4 Steps to Stop Any Fight Without Giving In. *Visit my website and reach out for coaching. *Follow me on Instagram and Facebook.  *Join my private Facebook Group: NVC for Couples