The Gobeski/Wallace Report Podcast

We do even more taste tests than usual, including Troll Churros. We run down what we're playing (which includes math). We review a publicly available high school English project.

Skype is deceased, but we don't let that get us down! We've got plenty of taste tests to drown our sorrows. Doug and Charlie recount an instance where they saw each other in REAL SPACE. We kick off our "2000 from the 2000's" playlist.

Paul and Tony went on a cruise and are still recovering from the excessive food, karaoke and impromptu prank war. How are two boys at sea supposed to manage when their hangovers don't line up? Paul is almost lost to Honduras. Tony buys a magnet.

We regret to inform the listener that we are no longer a "SeaQuest DSV" podcast; we are now a retro gaming podcast. We also regret that only some of us are playing retro games at the moment. Adam regrets not going into debt to obtain an old gaming console. Charlie is warned about the heavy metal content of some chips but eats them anyway.

We have an unexpected guest who isn't pulling any punches. Charlie eats some Easter candy and then ruins it for everyone's amusement. Doug puts tax cheats on notice. Plus, what's in store for James Bond?

The 17th installment of our Sci-Fi Shuffle has us discussing the 2023 animated film "Nimona". We try to imagine what this movie would have been like if it had stayed in the cowardly hands of Disney. Why doesn't anyone fully utilize their flying cars, and how does eveyone know what a whale is? Also, some less pedantic discussion about LGBTQ themes and representation. Paul wishes the Jumbo-tron had just a mouth on it.

Special guests appear and are EXTREMELY ENTHUSIASTIC about being on the show. In fact, both have new lines of fight sticks to promote, with multiple face plate designs and button configurations! Taste tests are interspersed. We all are hired by SNL by default.

Amber Elby and Dan Hess are back on the 16th edition of our Sci-Fi Shuffle to talk about the 2008 film "V for Vendetta", along with the usual cast of characters. Of course, we have to start the discussion arguing whether this even QUALIFIES as sci-fi. The movie makes us all feel bad, despite the sweet-ass kills. But don't let that stop you from watching it - just temporarily deny the existence of all events outside the story itself and you'll be fine!

Charlie laments his lack of knot knowledge. We taste test a puzzling new Doritos flavor. We round out the episode out by recounting our pandemic cabin fever purchases and mourning Charlie's nemesis (David Lynch).

We've got more holidays to discuss than you might expect, although this makes Kevin uncomfortable. Adam is combative with Charlie and his Christmas haul. We discover a new category of candy (log). We fail at our New Year's resolutions immediately.

It's the end of 2024, so of course we talk about a holiday that was over a month ago. Doug and Adam do some taste tests and we all ponder what spoiled Code Red would taste like. Adam talks about the advantages and disadvantages of mascot life.

Santa has amnesia and is stealing Christmas. It's up to Rude Elf to jog Santa's memory, while also hiding Santa's true identity from Santwo! It's less a question of WHETHER Christmas will be ruined than HOW. And how many sacks is too many?

More Sci-Fi Shuffle this week with 1927's silent classic "Metropolis" with guest Amber Elby! She talks about why this movie made her incapable of a bathroom break and why she is glad she didn't have to discuss the most recent version with her students (but she still has to with us). We also get into which jobs would be better as mini-games, which streaming service we presume this movie is on and whether it was better to just pay child actors with food.

If you thought the idea of Kirby feet was disturbing, you clearly haven't investigated all 3D printing has to offer. Adam offers to be a parent to Charlie's children after his inevitable demise. Paul and Tony talk about their upcoming cruise, but we fail to capitalize and do a "Cruise Tips" segment.

Charlie pulls executive privilege and allows Kara to nominate 1997's "Event Horizon" as this week's Sci-Fi Shuffle movie. We talk eerie sets, nightmarish editing timelines and doors that probably should have cut someone in half. What scares us more - being sucked into the bowels of Hell through an interdimensional portal, or the Washington red-tape holding back our service members? And of course, the more important question: DO YOU SEE?

We debut a new segment - The GW Confection Connection! It's basically a segment we do all the time, with a slightly different title! Charlie recounts being outmatched at SporcleCon. Kevin has rodent problems and perhaps Paul is being stalked by a roofer. Adam has perfected AI but luckily is not out of a job (yet).

Sci-Fi September comes to a close with the 13th installment of our Sci-Fi Shuffle, as we are pleasantly subjected to Doug's pick - 1984's "Nausicaa of the Valley of the Wind". It's animated, and it's sci-fi, so it's gonna be weird. But is it TOO weird for Kevin? Will the movie allow Doug to witness the destruction he craves? And will Adam ever let Paul unleash his flawless Japanese pronunciation?

In the 12th installment of our Sci-Fi Shuffle, Charlie has us watch his ostensibly favorite movie of all time - "Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure". We fail to find any deeper meaning or themes in this film so we mostly discuss what we liked! Adam can't remember which is Bill and which is Ted (but who can?). Who is YOUR favorite historical figure?

We revisit Wakanda in the 80th installment of our Merry Marvel Movie March - 2022's "Black Panther: Wakanda Forever". The film addresses the untimely passing of Chadwick Boseman who MOST OF US think is irreplaceable. Why do all the characters insist on mispronouncing the villain's name? How many fights is too many fights? And we discuss what we thought of MCU Phase 4, aka the COVID Phase.

Another Shenaniganza, this time in Marina! Between Bass Fishing, Vampire Survivors, and Among Us, the Shenaniganzers manage to get some actual sightseeing done - including a trip to a popular Star Trek filming location. Dotty is gassy and Tony isn't much to look at. Paul gets stopped by customs AGAIN. Brianne is attacked by a timepiece.

While this episode is ostensibly about The Recounting of the June Birthday Gifts, it secretly revolves around Doug's crankery. He puts a small bakery on blast, and calls out a restaurant for tax malfeasance. No eatery is safe when Doug is on the case!

We thought Tony Huff wouldn't show up this time, but he drove at unsafe speeds and BAC levels to make the recording! Alex Clark also arrives with wholly original commentary about AI-generated commentary. Adam wins something yet again, but this time he has an award to show for it. Charlie enacts another Edgar Allen Poe story with squirrels.

They said we couldn't review another "Dark" movie, but we sure showed THEM! The Sci-Fi Shuffle returns as we discuss the 1998 film "Dark City". Dan Hess isn't really sure Rufus Sewell is the protagonist, and the rest of us aren't sure he isn't Jude Law. We can all agree that the baddies in this one are bad at science and evil plan-making (and that pale children who bite are creepy).

Another cancellation is threatening to disrupt the podcast... and failing! Welcome to the first annual (for now) Campbellushi Day! Whether you love Bruce Campbell or would rather hang with Jim Belushi, we've got something for everyone! We've got transcript readings, June celebrity birthdays and way more A.I. art than is advisable in an audio format. And oh yeah, we've got COVID!

We're back and Thor is back and Jane Foster is back and it's all back again with the 79th installment of our Merry Marvel Movie March - "Thor: Love and Thunder"! But lest you think we talk too much about the film, we've got several chip tastings, sing-a-songs and some Star Trek asides. So a little bit of everything that makes the Gobeski/Wallace Report great!

TAYLOR SWIFT RELEASED A NEW ALBUM and it's FINE!!! Most of us have at least half-listened to it and demand that you hear us out. Doug tries old Mr. Beast and new Mr. Beast bars. And have you ever wondered how Keanu Reeves would taste in liquid form?

TAYLOR SWIFT RELEASED A NEW ALBUM and it's FINE!!! Most of us have at least half-listened to it and demand that you hear us out. Doug tries old Mr. Beast and new Mr. Beast bars. And have you ever wondered how Keanu Reeves would taste in liquid form?

We're back and Doug has chosen another scrappy entry in the Sci-Fi Shuffle - the 1975 space-workplace-comedy-sorta-student-film "Dark Star"! It's one of John Carpenter's first film credits and definitely the first to be hampered by notes from executives. It's a film that begs all the important questions. Does a bomb respond to phenomenology? How long is TOO long to be stuck in an elevator shaft? And just how ARE those Dodgers doing?

We recount life events that require 6-8 weeks to resolve. Charlie breaks his house and himself. Adam's hair gel goes missing. Doug may require vengeance. Charlie thinks Doug tricked him into eating chips, but he really just tricked himself.

We've got Double Madness coming at you this week! For our final installment of Merry Marvel Movie March Madness this year we are talking about "Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness". We disagree on just about everything in this movie: the music, the plot, the makeup and the character arcs! There's only one thing we find consensus on - it's really weird that Michael Stuhlbarg is in this movie.

We finally reach the zenith of the Merry Marvel Movie March with the box office and critical success "Morbius"! All kidding aside... well no, this episode is basically all kidding. If you want an in-depth critical analysis of "Morbius" you'll have to do a really deep dive into social media circa 2022. And then when you fail to find it there, you'll have to write it yourself. We never said it would be easy!

Kevin decided the movies we have been watching for our Sci-Fi Shuffle have been too GOOD, so he chose 1959's "Teenagers from Outer Space" for this episode. It has us immediately asking the question: where is all the delinquency we were promised? And why would a pile of bleached bones automatically imply murder? Should every movie essentially have the actors reading the stage direction? Paul thinks so!

We didn't mean for this episode to be about Tony Huff specifically... but here we go! The man himself talks about Gen-Z lingo, pleather zaddies and out-of-body trivia experiences. Also, he yells at his poor dog (only once to be fair!).

This time on the Sci-Fi Shuffle Paul chooses/recommends/subjects us to the 2021 stop motion film "Junk Head". Despite the post-post-apocalyptic setting, weird tumor foods, and penis monsters it's actually... pretty darn funny? We talk about the trials and tribulations of making a stop motion film all by yourself. Kevin turns in a surprising verdict.

It's the Annual Recounting of the Gifts, but we won't know until next December whether we got what we asked for - an uneventful 2024! We go through some New Year's resolutions, most of which lack ambition (the way we like it!). We also talk a bit about our love languages, and how to get Adam to take part in literally any theatrical performance.

The Merry Marvel Movie March reviews the 2021 film "Spider-Man: No Way Home" and is forced to reckon with past Spider-Mans (Spider-Men?). We enjoy revisiting... the characters that show up in cameos. But is it possible that you are reading this and are worried about spoilers? It's not like you were wandering around Bookman's several months after the movie's release. Getting spoilers in THAT situation would be unconscionable! Also, in true Charlie fashion, Kevin endlessly complains about a movie that he loves.

For this year's special holiday episode, Vic and the team visit the storied Frandon House, site of innumerable murders and apparently Rihanna's ghost. Several of the team go missing, though unfortunately none of them is Kyler. They ostensibly discuss the thirteenth episode of "The Real Ghostbusters", but are interrupted by one and only one Christmas-related spirit!

Unlike Charlie, when Adam has GI issues the tape keeps rolling! Paul, Kevin and Doug have to keep the podcast going by talking about "Scavengers Reign". Paul owns a home, or maybe just watches over the plumbing. And just because Charlie does a taste test doesn't mean anyone has to listen!

Give us an empty stage and a digital platform and we'll solve the world's problems! Welcome to the First Annual Gobeski/Wallace Report Summit, where the world's biggest heads collide in what can only be described as "synergistic misanthropy". We've got a space man, a cave man, a snack man and a weather man together for probably the first time ever. They've got ideas and the money to implement them, so get out of the way and invest what little money you have in to natural caverns!

Our Sci-Fi Shuffle has yet to visit a silly action movie - until now! This time, we discuss the 1993 Sylvester Stallone/Wesley Snipes/Sandra Bullock/Glenn Shadix vehicle "Demolition Man". Finally, a well-lit and only marginally dystopian future! Find out whether Kevin found the action banter to be "Commando"-worthy. And did Charlie miss key plot reveals because he was too engrossed in the action, or because he doesn't know how to watch movies?

It seems that passengers are finding new ways to make air travel miserable and just nasty overall. That's where Steven Weber and Tim Daly come in! They share their idea for a new "Wings" series with Tony "I Won A Tony" Shahloub. It's a topical look at the trials and tribulations of small charter airline pilots with gastrointestinal distress. Coming to a streaming service soon (no pun intended)!

We finally get around to our Merry Marvel Movie March again and talk about the 2021 pandemic-adjacent film "Eternals". We discuss our favorite of the large number of characters, and how we'd have felt if this had any cameos from ANY previous Marvel characters (it doesn't). We imagine an alternate reality where this somehow influences future MCU phases, while Doug gets angry that cinematography standards have been raised. How do we feel about Harry Styles these days? And who is the Black Knight? These are things we are forced to ponder in the final moments of the movie!

Until this week, we had no idea how many ways you could die by food. There's the obvious method of the One Chip Challenge. But you could also order from a poorly executed ghost kitchen. And perhaps most devastating of all - drowning in Thousand Island dressing!

Despite no one coming with a single topic, we manage to keep the conversation going by talking about... holes. And soil types! And construction, storms and elaborate work pranks that will help you NOT get fired!

Yes, Charlie has work stories and they involve SOUP. So, we're really bringing out the big guns for episode 250. But seriously - this episode has some boring, boring topics from Charlie. But since you're a completist, you have to listen anyway! Doug also tastes some chips.

The Sci-Fi Shuffle keeps on barrelling along, and this time Charlie has chosen the 1981 David Cronenberg film "Scanners". We were promised head explosions, and we got exactly one. But what an explosion it was! Additionally, some things blow up that we weren't really expecting. Was there too much body horror for Kevin, or just enough? And who leaves a full hotdog unattended at a food court??

We all have a bit of trouble recalling what happened on our birthdays, but I suppose that's what comes with age. Children, however, can remember every little scribble and hastily arranged art project they've made so you'd better save every single one! We taste some churro KitKats and Doug goes above and beyond in the name of science. An extremely non-ominous event is discussed as well as an embarrassing present that Adam buys for himself.

We're shuffling that sci-fi bag again and Dan Hess picked the 2018 space yarn "Prospect". No one has seen it, so no one knows what to expect (or who will die first). We spend an inordinate amount of time talking about things the movie deliberately did not explain. Most importantly: what counts as "meat"?

On the eve of Adam and Doug's first concert since COVID, we reminisce about other shows we've been to. Paul finds most concert-going to be a stressful event, while Charlie refuses to drive more than a couple hours to see anyone perform. We also mention a bunch of bands no one's thought about in the last ten years. So, pretty much a standard episode, then.

Birthdays abound in June, none more important than that of our dear friend Joe Piscopo, who is back on the podcast! We premiere a new segment: Joe Knows Chocolate. Joe is forced to reprise his role in an SNL sketch written in the 1980's, and a similar one written this week (sort of). On a completely related note, Charlie is no longer allowed to use ChatGPT while recording the podcast.

You know how they say "Be careful what you wish for"? Well, installment 74 of our Merry Marvel Movie March is a review of the movie "Venom: Let There Be Carnage", which doubles down on the buddy comedy vibes from the first film. And now we wish it were a full on rom-com! Are we being fickle, or has the franchise just not found its footing? We're holding out hope for "Venom 3", but box office numbers suggest the smart money is in staying the course.