Podcast appearances and mentions of cindy beall

god trust healing marriage cindy beall

Play Episode Listen Later Oct 12, 2021 51:29

20 years ago, Cindy Beall's marriage was dangling by a thread. Betrayal had shattered her reality and uncertainty was threatening her future. 10 years ago, Cindy published a book—divulging how she and her husband, Chris, experienced healing after trust was broken; offering hope to those following in their footsteps. Today, we're celebrating! The sweetness of [...] The post EP. 108 | Cindy Beall [Still Better Than New] appeared first on Jenn Jewell.

betrayal cindy beall

#161: Can I Find Healing in Marriage When Trust is Broken? With Cindy Beall

4:13 Podcast

Play Episode Listen Later Sep 30, 2021 29:43

A few days after an ordinary Valentine's Day, Cindy Beall's life changed forever. She listened with disbelief as her husband confessed to pornography addiction, numerous affairs, and the startling news that a woman was pregnant with his child. How in the world do you rebuild trust when your marriage is shattered? Well, today, you will hear how God's power can resurrect something new out of the debris of betrayal. Author Cindy Bealle will show us how to seek guidance, counseling, and prayer support when deceptions surface. She'll give you practical wisdom on how and when to rebuild trust. And, how to protect a marriage from lies and unfaithfulness today that we need to hear. So,open your heart because you are about to be flooded with hope! SHOW NOTES: 413Podcast.com/161

EP. 96 | Amy Groeschel, Cindy Beall, & Jenn Jewell [The Truth Behind Jeremiah 29:11]

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Play Episode Listen Later Mar 2, 2021 39:15

We have a treat for you today at The Messy Table Podcast! Instead of leaning into a story and highlighting truth, Amy Groeschel, Cindy Beall, and Jenn Jewell are leaning into Truth and letting it tell the story. "Truth from the Table," if you will... Jeremiah 29:11 is a crowd-favorite verse—often slapped onto home decor [...] The post EP. 96 | Amy Groeschel, Cindy Beall, & Jenn Jewell [The Truth Behind Jeremiah 29:11] appeared first on Jenn Jewell.

EP. 93 | Trillia Newbell [Endurance for the Road Ahead]

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Play Episode Listen Later Jan 19, 2021 49:16

If there's one thing we desperately need in the coming days and months (in addition to Jesus, of course), it's ENDURANCE for the road ahead. Patient endurance. Prayerful endurance. Sacred endurance. Today, the lovely Trillia Newbell is sharing a bit of her heart (and adorable laugh) with Cindy Beall and me, as well as with ALL of [...] The post EP. 93 | Trillia Newbell [Endurance for the Road Ahead] appeared first on Jenn Jewell.

EP. 89 | Lis Marin [God Doesn’t Make Mistakes]

god lis god doesn make mistakes cindy beall

Play Episode Listen Later Oct 27, 2020 43:37

God doesn't make mistakes. He isn't startled by "accidents." Nothing has ever suddenly occurred to Him. But He is big enough to handle whatever gets thrown His way. Grab your coffee, pull up a chair, and join Cindy Beall and me as we chat with Lis Marin at The Messy Table. Lis is a worship-loving, [...] The post EP. 89 | Lis Marin [God Doesn't Make Mistakes] appeared first on Jenn Jewell.

How Trust Can Be Rebuilt After Betrayal with Cindy Beall

Restored 2 More

Play Episode Listen Later Sep 23, 2020 53:49

Cindy Beall is a speaker, mentor, and author of “Healing Your Marriage When Trust is Broken” and “Rebuilding a Marriage Better Than New.” In this podcast, she relates to the broken-hearted women that have been blinded by their husbands’ actions and behaviors. She shares what her process of healing looked like and what her husband, Chris, did to rebuild trust in their relationship. We cover topics such as finding a couple’s individual roles, how to feel safe after betrayal, and how to have proper expectations. Listen to Cindy as she shares how marriages can be better than new and how it is possible for couples to thrive even after infidelity.

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Cindy Beall - Rebuilding your Marriage - Infidelity

Healing Word Radio

Play Episode Listen Later Aug 14, 2020 28:04

Cindy Beall - Rebuilding your Marriage - Infidelity by Bill and Sandi Griffin

marriage rebuilding infidelity cindy beall

Rebuilding a Marriage Better Than New (Part 3) - Chris and Cindy Beall

Dennis & Barbara's Top 25 All-Time Interviews

Play Episode Listen Later Jan 3, 2020 28:40

Rebuilding a Marriage Better Than New (Part 1) - Chris and Cindy BeallRebuilding a Marriage Better Than New (Part 2) - Chris and Cindy BeallRebuilding a Marriage Better Than New (Part 3) - Chris and Cindy BeallFamilyLife Today® Radio Transcript References to conferences, resources, or other special promotions may be obsolete. Embracing Hope Guest: Chris and Cindy Beall From the series: Rebuilding a Marriage Better Than New Bob: Rebuilding a broken marriage is not a simple process; it's not a painless process. But Chris Beall—who is doing it—says it is a worthwhile process to go through. Chris: You're walking through a betrayal—you don't know the where to go. The best thing you can do for other people is not tell a story but live a story. It's not time for you to focus on helping other people. Every day you're going to choose to forgive the other person, you are writing a sentence in a paragraph of a story that years from now will be worth telling—and we do that by submitting to God at every moment of this process of healing. Bob: This is FamilyLife Today for Wednesday, August 30th. Our host is the President of FamilyLife®, Dennis Rainey, and I'm Bob Lepine. If there has been damage done to your marriage, there is a path forward—and it's a path worth walking. Stay with us. 1:00 And welcome to FamilyLife Today. Thanks for joining us. I sent out a tweet a while back and I got a response to it. I'm thinking maybe our guests could help—knowing how I should respond to the response. The tweet I sent out said—it was from when Gary Thomas was here and we were talking about cherishing and what it means to cherish one another in marriage. I said, “Cherishing another person means I'm going to look out for your interests as more important than my own.” The tweet I got back was from somebody who said, “How do you get there with a lying, betraying husband who has no idea what passion or intimacy is?” I don't know how to answer that in 140 characters—I don't think you can answer that in 140 characters—but it's a very real issue for a lot of people thinking, “How do I fulfill my vows? How do I love and trust and cherish another person when they are a lying, betraying individual?” 2:00 Dennis: That really is a good question—and I'm glad we have the guests that we have on FamilyLife Today. Bob: So we're off the hook! Dennis: Chris— Bob: So, we'll let them answer it! Dennis: Chris and Cindy Beall join us again on the broadcast. Welcome back. Chris and Cindy: Thank you! Dennis: Chris is a pastor at Life Church in Oklahoma City. Cindy is an author of a book called, Rebuilding a Marriage Better Than New—and Cindy, you're the expert on this because this is what you've done. Cindy: One of the things that people often say is, “Well, I'm going to do this to them because they are doing this to me”—so through revenge they are getting back at someone. I believe that when we get back at someone, the first person that we're hurting is God. If Chris sins against me and then I then turn around and say, “I'm going to go cheat on him.” I've wounded the heart of God first—I have broken covenant with Him first—and then I might hurt my husband. For me, I would say to that woman—or to anyone—you've got to do the right thing regardless of someone else's actions. 3:00 That's it. Someone else's sinful life does not give me the right to sin against my God. That's where I lived. It's not easy. It's very challenging, and I can't say I did it 100% perfect all the time—but I don't want to break my God's heart—I don't want to do that. Bob: You've had the opportunity, over that last half dozen years, to sit down with lots of couples who have gone through what you lived through. What you lived through was years of your husband looking at pornography—ultimately that lead to affairs outside of marriage—he fathered a son. You didn't know any of this. He finally comes clean. You have to decide—“Am I going to stay with him? Am I going to try to rebuild this marriage? Can I ever trust him again?”—all of these things facing you. When you sit down with these couples today, they are at a place that you were at, where there is a road in front of them. 4:00 You can pick one path and that's a path that can feel like it will cause the pain to stop right away—or you can pick the other path which feels like this is going to take me right into the pain. What kind of hope do you give them and how do you point them in a God-ward direction? Cindy: The first thing, I think— just the fact that maybe it's the four of us—maybe it's a couple and Chris and me. I think the fact just seeing us brings them some hope—just the fact that we've lived through it. So when I'm faced with that question a lot of women will say, “What should I do?” Honestly, I cannot make that decision for them. I tell them, “You don't you have to decide the rest of your life today.” I steal that little phrase from my friend Kevin. 5:00 But I also just encourage them, “Look, whatever path you take is going to hurt. Where is God leading you? Let the peace of God be your guide.” If you've got a spouse that is willing to do whatever it takes—you're willing to lay your life down and rebuild this. Consider this path. If you've got a spouse that's still with someone else, or is acting like all this is your fault. Then you might have to play some hardball there, and show some tough love. Dennis: I'm just thinking of the command in Genesis 2, that says, “for this cause a man shall leave his father and mother, shall cleave to one another, and the two shall become one.” If you had not made a covenant between three—a man, and a woman, and their God—there's no way this marriage would be standing today. Chris: Right! Dennis: There wouldn't be a title of a book, Rebuilding a Marriage Better—Better!— Than New. Chris: Right. Dennis: The covenant of Almighty God gave you the standard to make this work. 6:00 Chris: Right. One thing that we experienced several years back—I'll set the scenario, but it's super-relevant—almost four years ago, our house burned down. We are going through this process of, “Okay we've lost everything, we have to rebuild. We've got to replace everything.” Our insurance company—that was amazing, I will tell you—they said, “We're going to pay to rebuild your house, but we don't think your foundation is damaged, so we're not going to pay to replace it.” In our office when we meet with couples—we see this every day—there's some huge catastrophe in their marriage and they want a new house but they are unwilling to replace the old foundation. So how do we communicate? There are behaviors that we've got to go past the foundation and create a new normal. Dennis: What you're saying is, it's not a matter of slapping a new coat of paint— Chris: Right. Dennis: —on a house that is rotting. Chris: Right. Dennis: But you've got to start with the right foundation. 7:00 I just have to say here, this is why the Weekend to Remember® marriage getaway is so important for couples. I was driven to the airport by a guy whose son and a young lady are getting ready to get married. I told him and I said, “Give your son and your future daughter-in-law the very best wedding gift they will ever receive because it will help them turn their marriage license into a marriage—into a real marriage—” Chris: Right! Dennis: “—into one that is built on the right foundation.” It's very practical—talking about how two imperfect people—from the start—can build a single structure—together—off the same set of blueprints. Give them the conference, the Weekend to Remember marriage getaway as a gift—it will pay off for decades. The guy nodded his head and said, “You know, I'm going to talk to my wife about that tonight because we want their marriage to go the distance.” 8:00 Bob: There's information about the Weekend to Remember online at FamilyLifeToday.com if our listeners are interested. If you have not been—you really ought to check it out. Dennis: And it's not just for engaged couples. Bob: No, and that's right! It's always good to take the marriage in for a little preventive maintenance; right? Dennis: We had a couple recently attend who'd been married 60 years. Bob: Yes. Dennis: They felt it was time for an oil change and a tune-up. There you go!! Bob: I think one of the things that you two have learned in the rebuilding process of your marriage is that as you've invested in other peoples' marriages—God has used that to strengthen the bond between the two of you; right? —Talk about that. Cindy: It is the best part of our story that when we share with others—when we help them with the same help that was given to us—2 Corinthians 1:3-4—when we do that—it's like we heal more. 9:00 Like with each couple we visit with—with each woman I talk with on the phone, or have a FaceTime conversation or meet for coffee—with each conversation, God is redeeming that marriage bit by bit. What's funny is I love our marriage where it is. We're best friends! We're very healthy—that's the word I use to describe our marriage—very healthy. Not “perfect”, not “good”, not “great”—healthy and strong. What's fun is that it's getting better, because we're going to invest—we are going to continue to steward our story and share and help others so it's just going to get better. Chris: I'd say for—say for any listener that's in the early stages of just trying to figure out—you're walking through a betrayal, you don't know where to go—the best thing you can do for other people, is not tell a story—but live a story. It's not time for you to focus on helping other people. 10:00 Every day that you walk through a trigger that hits you or you're going to choose to forgive the other person, you're writing a sentence in a paragraph of a story that years from now will be worth telling. You don't need to be focused on telling your story but you need to be focused on writing that story. We do that by submitting to God in every moment of this process of healing. Bob: I agree with you—I do think though there are some couples who think, “Well, we could never try to reach out and help others because our marriage isn't perfect.” Chris: Right. Bob: That leaves a lot of people never reaching out and helping anybody— Chris: Right. Bob: —because our marriages are never perfect. At what level of health—where do you need to get to health-wise before you can start to say, “I think maybe we can speak into somebody else's life?” Chris: Early on it wasn't us looking for people to help it was people coming to us. If we felt like we were at least one step ahead of them— Dennis: There you go! Chris: Here we go! Let's go! We can offer you—here's what we're doing, we're on the road too—we're not experts. In these latter days it's been much more where we're looking to pro-actively help people. 11:00 But for the most part of this 15 years, people would come to us, “Hey, I heard you're going through this”—if we really felt like that was a step ahead. That pretty much pertains to every person listening to this—you are a step ahead of someone. Cindy: Someone. Bob: That's right—and somebody is a step ahead of you. Chris: Correct. Bob: If you can be in a cycle where you're learning from those who are a step ahead of you and you are helping those who are a step behind you. That's how the church is supposed to work—that's what this is supposed to look like; right? Chris: Absolutely! Pauls and Timothys! We each have somebody pouring into us and we each have people that we are pouring into—absolutely! Dennis: You had somebody who invested in you in the early months after the bombshell went off in your marriage. Cindy: Yes, Jim and Beth Kuykendall—we cannot speak more highly of them. There are not enough words in the dictionary to talk about how amazing they are. Without their input we would just have been a hot mess. 12:00 Chris: Jim and Beth—for the first 30 days—every night—were sitting on our living room floor. There was just this invasive commitment to—“We're going to do life together”—and, “As you guys face things—just today—we're going to process them and speak of life over you—we're going to go to God's word, every single night.” That may not be realistic for everyone, but that had such a huge impact—not just in the counsel that they gave, but just the relational presence—knowing that they had walked through a similar story. We have a physical example of hope sitting right in front of us on our couch. Bob: Chris—I have to ask because it's been 15 years now since the story was told. Prior to that time you had been ensnared with pornography and where that led you—the temptation can't have just gone completely away. Over the last 15 years to where you go, yes, you know, I've felt that for a long time and I just never feel it anymore. Chris: I'm all good! I'm fixed! 13:00 Bob: So what's the difference between the temptation today and what it used to be? Chris: How I would answer that is that I am free—but I am not fixed. I'm a human being, I'm imperfect—I have a sin nature just like everyone else. So I am free. I am not a slave to this sin and I haven't been for 15 years—but I am tempted just like everyone else. I‘ll give you an example. I have learned to see the temptations and respond a little bit more quickly to them. In fact, it wasn't all that long ago, that a young lady that came up to me—a precious young lady—attractive. “Pastor Chris, you've changed my life. I think you could really help me sort through some things in my life.” In that moment, I've got a little bit of warning signs going off—so I called Cindy. “Hey, this just happened to me.” Then I brought my staff—my entire team—I said, “Hey, I want you to keep your eyes on me. If there is anything that you ever see that seems off—intercept it.” 14:00 It wasn't even like an inappropriate conversation on behalf of this girl—it was completely innocent—but it was like just maybe the beginning seed of a temptation that the moment I acknowledged it—and had a conversation with Cindy and my team—it was gone. So I do my best to kind of predict, “Where is the enemy going to come after me?” I am just going to be overly honest when those temptations come. Keeping it in the dark is like a Petri dish for sin to grow. The moment we bring it into the light I just think that is where the power of healing happens. We do have a spiritual enemy! I believe that in those moments—“I can't, I don't have it in there, I‘m going to have to find a different avenue.” Dennis: I believe it's in Genesis chapter 4 where it talks about sin— Chris: Crouching. Bob: Crouching at your door? Dennis: Crouching at your door. Chapter 4:7. What I just want every listener—male and female—to know—it may not be pornography. 15:00 I don't know what it is—what your Achilles heel is—but I can promise you—in fact, yesterday when I stepped out of my house, I thought, “I'm stepping out of a safe place.” Not that there isn't sin able to get its way into our house—there is—but I'm stepping into the world where there is a spiritual battle occurring. We don't see what's taking place. Interestingly a friend sent me a link—and I don't know what my friend was really thinking but I clicked on it and it didn't take long to realize, “This is not a good place to be.” I clicked off and went away. I still think I owe my friend an email back to say, “Why did you send that to me?” By the way, there's a lot of stuff flipped around on the internet and posted in all kinds of places—just be wise. 16:00 You may be throwing something to someone and it may be his or her Achilles heel—spiritually speaking. Chris: The spirit and the flesh—the Bible says—are at war for what is going to be dominant in their lives. The Holy Spirit wants to be that which propels us and leads every part of our lives—but if the things that we're feeding our mind and our time are the things of the flesh—we're going to be dominated by the flesh. We just have to be very aware that the more we can starve our flesh and feed the things that the Spirit in us craves, those temptations will minimize. They don't go away—but they will minimize. Bob: Most of us are way too casual in our daily battle with sin. Chris: Agreed. Bob: We walk around like there is not a war going on—we walk around like we're in complete safety—and we get ambushed when we do that. Chris: Right. Bob: As opposed to walking around with the alert system on—your alert system that goes— 17:00 “Okay—this is just a seed here—but a seed can grow into something if I don't deal with it right now.” Dennis: I want to encourage our listeners—every listener who is a follower of Jesus Christ is an ambassador—an ambassador you have a message and a mission. I want to read to you a little bit of your mission and message found in Isaiah 61. If you haven't read the first eight to ten verses of this passage of Scripture you ought to read it because I've thought of this all week as we've interviewed you two—how you guys are really like something that's described in here—I'll get to that in a moment. Here's what it says about our message and our mission: “The Spirit of the Lord God is upon me, because the LORD has anointed me to bring good news to the poor; He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, — 18:00 to proclaim liberty to the captives, and the opening of the prison to those who are bound; and to proclaim the year of the LORD's favor—” It goes on to talk about some other matters and then it says: “that they may be called”—and this is what I thought of you two—“oaks of righteousness, the planting of the LORD, that He may be glorified. They shall build up the ancient ruins; they shall raise up the former devastations; they shall repair the ruined cities,”—listen to this last phrase—“the devastations of many generations.” Chris: Wow! Dennis: You two are oaks of righteousness—you are providing shade for couples who've gone through the valley and they're in need of someone saying, “You can do it!” 19:00 Chris: Wow! Dennis: The church is there. We will come along side you, we will pray for you, we will minister to you and future generations are at stake. Bob: Tell our listeners about the dinner you had not long ago with somebody who had found Chris and Cindy's story online along with other stories that they've heard on FamilyLife Today—and how God had used that in his life. Dennis: This is a person who been through dark days in his marriage. He became a super sleuth on FamilyLife Today. He went in search of every story of redemption and reconciliation that he could find and he found yours. He said, “I was hopeless but I listened and I listened and I listened.” For three and a half years he battled for his marriage. Chris: Wow! 20:00 Dennis: I asked him—I said, “If I went to your wife right now and asked her what your marriage was like on a ten point scale what would she say?” He said, “A ten!” What about you? A ten! And he's not saying it's perfect, but he's just saying where sin abounds, grace and forgiveness much more. That is the gospel of Jesus Christ. Nobody listening to us here is beyond the reach of God's arm to welcome you in to the family and forgive your sin. There's nothing you have done that you can earn God's favor—nor nothing you can do to cause Him to flee from you. You just need to receive Jesus Christ as your Lord, Master, and Savior and then get on with the process— Chris: Amen. Dennis: —of becoming God's man—God's woman, and if you're married—God's couple. Then leave a godly legacy to future generations which you guys have done. 21:00 And I just have to tell you again. I'm really proud of you for not quitting—for still standing—and for using your wounds to proclaim who Christ is. Way to go! Cindy: Thank you! Chris: God is good! Bob: I can imagine there are folks listening who have been thinking—as they've heard you share your story—about a couple they know facing a similar situation—where there's been infidelity, betrayal, where trust has been broken. I‘d encourage them not only to send their friends a link to the conversations we've had here this week, but also send them a copy of the book, Rebuilding A Marriage Better Than New—where you share with folks what you've done and how God's worked in your marriage to bring it to where it is today. We've got copies of the book, Rebuilding A Marriage Better Than New in our FamilyLife Today Resource Center. You can go online to order your copy. Our website is FamilyLifeToday.com. 22:00 You can also order by phone. Our number is 1-800-FL-TODAY. So again. the website— FamilyLifeToday.com. The phone number is 1-800-FL-TODAY. Ask about the book, Rebuilding A Marriage Better Than New by Cindy Beall when you get in touch with us. And, if you're online be sure to watch the video clip that features Chris and Cindy sharing their story. Maybe you'd want to forward that to your friends as well. Again the website is FamilyLifeToday.com. As summer is coming to an end, the month of August is almost over and that means we're in the home stretch for the matching gift opportunity that we've been telling you about all month long. We had a friend of the ministry come to us back at the beginning of the month. He offered to match every donation we receive during the month of August on a dollar for dollar basis. He put a cap on that at $800,000. We're in the home stretch to try to make sure that we're able to take full advantage of those matching gift funds. 23:00 If we are, it will allow us to extend the reach of all that we're doing here at FamilyLife in the months ahead. Help us reach more young married couples, more moms and dads, more people worldwide with practical, biblical help and hope for your marriage and your family. In fact, we did some calculating not long ago and just with this radio program—if you're able to donate $8.24—we can get the program in the ears of 1000 people. Of course, when you make that donation we'll get another $8.24 from the matching gift fund—another 1000 people. So it's just a great opportunity, but it's got an expiration date—and that is tomorrow. We're asking you today to donate online at FamilyLifeToday.com or call to donate at 1-800-FL-TODAY. Or you can mail your donation and—as long as it's postmarked today or tomorrow—it will still qualify for matching funds. 24:00 Our mailing address is: FamilyLife Today, P.O. Box 7111 Little Rock, Arkansas. Our zip code is 72223. And again, please pray that we will receive enough donations to be able to take full advantage of this matching gift. I hope you can join us back tomorrow. We're going to talk about the power of decisions that we make—and how some decisions can be life altering. We'll talk more about that tomorrow. Hope you can tune in for that. I want to thank our engineer today; his name is Keith Lynch, also our entire broadcast production team. On behalf of our host, Dennis Rainey, I'm Bob Lepine. We will see you tomorrow for another edition of FamilyLife Today. FamilyLife Today is a production of FamilyLife of Little Rock, Arkansas. A Cru® ministry.Help for today. Hope for tomorrow. We are so happy to provide these transcripts to you. However, there is a cost to produce them for our website. If you've benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider donating today to help defray the costs? Copyright © 2017 FamilyLife. All rights reserved. www.FamilyLife.com

Rebuilding a Marriage Better Than New (Part 2) - Chris and Cindy Beall

Dennis & Barbara's Top 25 All-Time Interviews

Play Episode Listen Later Jan 3, 2020 25:18

Rebuilding a Marriage Better Than New (Part 1) - Chris and Cindy BeallRebuilding a Marriage Better Than New (Part 2) - Chris and Cindy BeallRebuilding a Marriage Better Than New (Part 3) - Chris and Cindy BeallFamilyLife Today® Radio Transcript References to conferences, resources, or other special promotions may be obsolete. Gradually Rebuilding Trust Guests: Chris & Cindy Beall From the series: Rebuilding a Marriage Better Than New (Day 2 of 3) Bob: When Chris Beall was unfaithful to his wife Cindy, she faced a decision. Was she going to forgive him, or not? Here's how she thought that through. Cindy: I really do believe—with all my heart—he never wanted to hurt me. He still did—but he did not want that—so forgiving him, was really rather easy. Trusting him? That was something had to be earned for months—and years—to come. Bob: This is FamilyLife Today for Tuesday, August 29th. Our host is the President of FamilyLife®, Dennis Rainey, and I'm Bob Lepine. What does the process of rebuilding trust in a broken marriage relationship look like? Chris and Cindy Beall join us today to talk about their experience. Stay with us. And welcome to FamilyLife Today. Thanks for joining us. One of the things that we've talked with couples about over the years is the whole issue of how trust gets rebuilt in a relationship when that trust has been violated. 1:00 Usually the violator is hoping that that trust can get rebuilt—like really quickly. The violated person is going, “No, no, no, no, no—this is a much slower process than you imagine—or than it feels like it ought to be to you—because you're not the one who got kicked in the gut; right? Dennis: Yes. Usually the one who confesses the sin—especially in a marriage relationship where a betrayal is so personal—feels like they can empty the garbage can and it's like a dump truck comes and takes it away. Bob: And they feel free because they've become unburdened! Dennis: They've finally gotten rid of it and their spouse is left to know—what do I do with this— Bob: In the garbage! Dennis: —with this garbage? We've got a couple with us—first of all the author of the book Rebuilding a Marriage Better Than New, Cindy Beall—welcome back, Cindy. Cindy: Thank you. Dennis: And her husband Chris, joins us. Chris: Thank you. So excited to be here. Dennis: They've been married since 1993. They have three boys. 2:00 You shared earlier about how your marriage had to deal with Chris's deceit, betrayal, pornography, an affair, the birth of a child outside of marriage that you knew nothing about—and your world was shattered instantly. Yet, one of the great parts of your story is that you were part of a church—Life Church—where you now work— Chris: Correct. Dennis: —Chris. I actually love this part of the story, Bob, because many of us have heard a lot of couples, where things have gone wrong and they kind of drop off the face of the planet, and you never hear from them again. Well, that's not the case with Chris and Cindy Beall. They received forgiveness from one another—they have experienced healing. That's what I really want to explore here—and begin with you, Cindy, to just unpack. After you initially responded with grace and forgiveness and a commitment to the marriage some three weeks into the discovery that your husband had been unfaithful for a number of years— 3:00 —not only with pornography but also with affairs with multiple women. How did you experience that healing on an ongoing basis—because there are a lot of listeners who are in the midst of their own deep trauma and trial right now—they need to know where to look for help and hope. Cindy: Grief is not enjoyable. Nobody wants to grieve. We experienced grief when we lose something—it could be a job, it could be a relationship, it could be a person—so our marriage—I felt like—died that day. So I began a grief process. There's different stages—you can research and find about all that—but I didn't really experience a ton of anger or denial—I went straight into the ‘pit of despair', is what I call it. For me, I tried for a little bit to kind of push it away when triggers would come. That's what I used the phrase a lot in my book and when I'm talking to women. 4:00 Triggers would come to remind me of something he had done or something he had said that would trigger back to that two and a half year period. I had an option—I could suppress it—push it aside—forget it—not think about it—or I could feel it and I could push through it and I could move through it. Dennis: Let's talk about one of those triggers. One of the ways would be when he came home late. Maybe a bit later than he had told you he would be home. Cindy: Oh, yes! And I'm thinking, “This reminds me of that time period and what am I going to do with it?” An even better trigger—I want to tell you about this—that I wrote about—I was in Walmart and I was grocery shopping. I remember looking up on the shelf for a particular item for this recipe I was making. This was probably three months after confession. I see it and I'm reminded of something that I used to do when we lived in the other town and it reminded me of, “Oh, he often wasn't home when I did this.” “He was doing a ministry appointment.” 5:00 “Oh, he was—,“ and it triggered and I started thinking, “Oh my gosh!” and I began to cry. In the middle of the aisle in the Walmart. Totally crying—not like on the floor crying— but crying—and I cried for probably a good minute. Then all of a sudden, I just kind of stopped, and I wiped my tears, and I kept grocery shopping. A lot of people would not have let that happen—they would have run out of the store—they would have stopped, they wouldn't have thought about it, but that's what I'm talking about. When these triggers come that remind you of the past, if we do not deal with them—if we do not face them—if we do not feelthem—they'll be there again! So that day I faced a trigger and my healing went a step further—I firmly believe that. I did a whole bunch of that—for a very long time. Bob: I want to make sure our listeners understand, it was three weeks after Chris's confession that you made the decision, “I'm going to stick this out.” Did you forgive him three weeks later? 6:00 Was grace extended in that moment? Or was it like, “I'm going to tough this out but we've still got a loooong road to hoe before you're back in my bed”? Cindy: Forgiveness, for me, was rather quick. I have been forgiven of so much. I watched the actions of my broken, repentant, remorseful husband day after day after day, and I know how much he did not want to do that. I really do believe—with all my heart—he never wanted to hurt me. He still did, but he did not want that. So forgiving him was really rather easy. Trusting him? That was something that had to be earned for months—and years—to come. Just because God called me to stay—and I knew after three weeks—it wasn't like, “Okay! We're good!” No, no. I had to deal with all the—the garbage that I was covered in at this point. He was freer and flying high. I mean, he was amazing and he did so many things to earn my trust back—that he still does 15 years later. 7:00 But, man, it still hurt. I still had to deal with the pain. Bob: Years to rebuild trust? Cindy: Yes. Years. Chris: I would say this—people ask her to this day, “Do you trust Chris?” and this is her response, “I trust God in him.” Bob: Yes. Chris: “When he's walking empowered by the Holy Spirit, I trust that.” Honestly, is there anything trustworthy in any of us? Bob: Yes. Chris: Outside of God empowering us? Sometimes I feel like we emphasize this idea of human trust outside of God that I don't know that is actually real. When I—for the last 15 years of healing, that's been really my number one job is to live empowered by the Holy Spirit—humble and grateful that every day that I have with my boys and with my wife is an undeserved gift. One thing about Cindy I will say—and this is probably not realistic so,— 8:00 —if you're listening, don't beat yourself up if you've done this but—in the last 15 years, Cindy has never once used what I did as ammunition to hurt me. I really believe that she—in a supernatural way—internalizes how much she's been forgiven by God. Her choosing not to use to wound— Dennis: —to punish. Chris: —to punish—is a choice of somebody that has been also forgiven much. I think that's a significant thing. Dennis: Cindy, I—this is—this may be off limits so, if you don't want to answer this question, it's fine. Cindy: Okay. Dennis: I'm not a woman—I can't begin to imagine what it might be like to go to bed with my husband and in that moment of intimacy—more than a trigger—flashbacks. Cindy: —an onslaught. Dennis: Yes—a tsunami. How have you handled that? 9:00 Cindy: Obviously, it's part of the healing. It was very difficult—it was almost like, “Let's just get through this.” Chris: There was six weeks where there was no physical intimacy in our marriage. Our mentors, walking us through this, basically said, “Look, this is something that Cindy is going to set—it's going to be her decision.” Six weeks into the healing process there was a moment where Cindy was open to us being together. Cindy: And it was very challenging. My heart was thinking, “What's he thinking about?” “What does she look like?” “Does she have a better body than me?” All of these thoughts are going through and I just began to take thoughts captive—I mean I am literally taking thoughts captive in that moment. Dennis: For those who don't understand what that means, that's praying and actually just offering those thoughts before God. “God, take these thoughts.” Cindy: Yes. Dennis: “Cleanse them.” Cindy: Yes. Dennis: “Wash them clean.” Cindy: “God help me—help me not think about this.” “I know that you have redeemed this—You've redeemed my marriage—You're making things new.” 10:00 “Please God just help me to make it through.” And then as things progressed in the months to come, there was just less and less of the onslaught of that happening. Bob: Did it take months before you being together was something that you could embrace and enjoy as a wife. Cindy: Potentially closer to a year—maybe more—I can't really remember—but yes, it took a long time. Sadly, people see what we have 15 years later and they think, “I want that!” and I'm like, “Are you sure?” Bob: Yes. Dennis: Yes. You're title of you book makes me emotional to think about it! It a tremendous hope-giving title: Rebuilding a Marriage Better Than New. So you wouldn't trade in what you have today? Cindy: I wouldn't. I wouldn't go back. I wouldn't go back—and have a faithful husband. I wouldn't go back—and not have my stepson, whom I adore. I wouldn't go back and trade all the pain to have what I have now. 11:00 I wouldn't go back. I wouldn't do it. Bob: I think it's important for a wife—or even a husband—who's been a victim here. It took a year or more before you could fully be engaged in intimacy with your husband but that doesn't mean it was a year or more before you shared intimacy with your husband. You guys were together during that time with you having to process everything in those moments—but you also recognizing, “If our marriage is going to work, this is a part of what makes a marriage work.” Cindy: Yes. We were growing as a couple in that—let's just take the six week time period—we were growing and he was finally investing in our marriage—after two and a half years of not doing it. That's what happens with these people who start cheating—they're investing somewhere else. When you start investing where you're supposed to—and our intimacy was growing—Yes! We wanted to. 12:00 Dennis: So, Chris—as you were talking about the three weeks—the six weeks—the year—you're not a robot either. Chris: Right. Dennis: What were you learning? Chris: I think the—trying to understand—”How did I get here?” Because there was never a day that I said, “You know, I think I'm going to become a sex addict and I think I'm going to be addicted to pornography for the better part of my adult life.” Those thoughts never went through my head—it was just one—pushing one moral boundary after the other—just real subtle things. Going through the healing process—learning how to be convicted of my sin so not to be ashamed, necessarily—but to be broken—personally—for what I've done and how that affected those that I love—including God—on one side—then truly and fully walking in the grace of Christ—that I am enough—just as I am. That—that was probably one of the most challenging and life-changing things. 13:00 I was working in retail at the time—there was an 18-month period where—almost two years—where I wasn't in ministry and really, ministry was not even on the radar—it's like, “We're done.” Dennis: Your church actually— Chris: Yes. Dennis: —took you off of the stage from leading worship— Chris: Correct. Dennis: —and put you to work at Home Depot and took away all your screens. Cindy: Yes. Chris: The leadership team—they came and took the computer. They said, “You're going to be under our covering”—which means you just have to do whatever we tell you to do. If you want to go on vacation—ask us first. If you want to get a job—which you're going to need a job—you can't travel, you can't have a computer and you can't have the ability to be alone with women. Dennis: You stayed in the church. Cindy: Yes. Chris: Absolutely! Yes. Cindy: We sat on the front row. Chris: —where people knew! Where people knew. Dennis: That took a lot of courage, too. Chris: Well, but here's the thing—so we went the weekend after the announcement and then Craig Groshell, my pastor, made the comment that, “Chris and Cindy's with us today.” It was in that moment that the church stood up [Emotion in voice]— 14:00 —and gave us a round of applause—and there was a line to hug our necks! This is a week after the confession! In that moment—that's really when I had just supernatural hope. It was this community of faith was going to be the hospital where we heal. God is planting the seeds for redemption. That weekend—that day in church—it changed us. Bob: Cindy, could your marriage have made it to where it is today if there had not been a community doing what this community of faith did? If it was just the two of you saying, “Okay, we'll try to rebuild. We'll see a counselor. We'll do our best.” You think your marriage would have survived that? Cindy: I can't see how it would have. 15:00 There's just something special about telling people—like-minded believers—that are going to speak the truth and encourage you and build you up and hold your arms up when you can't hold them up anymore. We had that, not only from the church staff but from our people in the congregation. Dennis: Cindy, as Chris was telling that story, I reached and gave you a Kleenex. I want to know what it was like to have people line up and come by and look you in the eyes and hug you. What was that like? Cindy: It was—peacefully difficult. There was some embarrassment—a little bit—kind of like…everybody knows your business now. [Emotion in voice] You're so vulnerable and so raw—but, man! To see them actually do what the church is supposed to do? How we're supposed to help other believers heal. That was a very profound thing—and it made me think, “I can stay here with these people. I can stay here.” Bob: These were not your lifelong friends. Cindy: I'd been there six weeks! 16:00 I didn't even really have a lot of friends! Bob: Right. Dennis: I don't know what it feels like at this level—I'm a broken person too, but—it has to be a little bit like a leper. Chris: Yes. Dennis: You had to feel like a leper at that moment and have people standing in line to hug you? Cindy: Yes. Chris: Yes. Dennis: What the flesh wants to do is run! Cindy: Right. Dennis: In the other direction—the exit. Chris: I think—Craig stood on stage the week before and said that the American church, unfortunately—more often than not—is one of the only institutions on the planet that shoot their wounded. That will not happen—we will be a hospital. Secondly, he said that gossip kills churches and if we all know the truth in love, then we're truly free to just love them and be a voice of healing. I had one conversation—probably 18 months later—that I think really painted the picture of what—from the perspective of the church—the body of Christ—there was a 75 year old woman that came up to me. 17:00 I don't even remember meeting her—I didn't know who she was—but she walked up to me in church and she grabbed my collar and she said, “Son, are you still free?” I looked at her and I said, “Yes, ma'am.” And she smiled and she said, “We did it!” She didn't say, “You did it!” She didn't say, “Good for your marriage,” she said, “We did it!” I really believe that there's a responsibility that's placed on a community that's of faith—to be environments of healing. She was so proud to be a part of a church that—in her mind—we did it right. Dennis: Your story reminds me of another one that Bob and I were told live on stage at the Christian Alliance for Orphans Summit where—I believe it was a foster care young lady who was cared for by a woman in the church—was never adopted by her, as I recall. She fell in love as a young lady in her 20's and when it came time [Emotion in voice] to give her away in the wedding to the man— 18:00 —the entire church stood up and said, “Who gives this woman to be married to this man?” You know, that's really what the church was expressing there when they said, “We did it! We really did it.” Cindy, I want you to comment on something. Earlier you said you became convicted that whatever you did, you need to give God the glory. What did that look like? Now, looking back on this, what does it mean to give God the glory—practically speaking? Cindy: It's probably different than what you might expect. We see people in the world where say something nice—“Dennis, great book. Oh, praise God, He's so good.” We give God the glory in that capacity—or we think we do—and we might. For me, giving God the glory is a heart condition. 19:00 I began—when people would come up—and they still do—and they say, “Oh! You're so amazing!” They'll say things like, “You saved my marriage!” and I'm thinking, “No I didn't. I'm a human—God saved it!” When I get all these compliments—whether it's speaking at an event and people are like, “Oh, you—that was so good!” I just—in the quiet of my heart—I just say, “God, if they only knew! I'm so wretched!” I'm thinking this to myself and I just—“Thank you God, that you're using me—this vessel.” I just look at them and I say, “Thanks.” “Thank you.” Then I always turn it and I'll say, “What did God speak to you?” If I'm speaking…and they said something—“What did He say to you?” I'm trying to shift it to where I want to know what He spoke. At the same time, we're called to encourage as long as it is today—so that none of us will be hardened by sin's deceitfulness. So if I encourage you and you slam it back against me—you say, “Oh no, it wasn't me, it was just God.” 20:00 I'm trying to encourage you and if you don't allow me, I'm not using that gift—that command that I have. That was—for me—what I began to do—was…giving God glory. For me, giving Him glory was so internal—was so internal. Bob: I think it's evident in what you've done in two books now because you've written two books telling this story and it all keeps pointing back to how it's God at work in this. Nobody can read these books and go, “You're just so smart! You're just so clever! You came up with all kinds of solu—“ “Those tactics you had—where did you come up—“ This is just all about all about the healing power of God in the life of a couple. Dennis: For those of you who want to hear Chris's answer to a question I'm about to ask him, you're going to have to go to our website. Okay? Bob: Okay. Are we going to hear the question? Dennis: Oh, we're going to hear the question— Bob: —and then the answer will be online. [Laughter] Dennis: —and the answer will be online. 21:00 Chris, this wasn't your statement—whatever you did you wanted to give God the glory—that was your wife's statement. I'm just curious as to how you feel in the years that have past that has worked its way out in you. Bob: That's a good question. Again, we're not going to listen to the answer now—the answer will be online at FamilyLifeToday.com. Head over there to hear Chris's thoughts on how God has been glorified in the midst of the brokenness that has been a part of your marriage relationship. We also have copies of the book that Cindy has written telling their story. It's called Rebuilding A Marriage Better Than New. While you're on our website at FamilyLifeToday.com, you can order a copy of the book or you can call to order if you'd like. Again the website is FamilyLifeToday.com. The number to call to order is 1-800-358-6329. 20:00 That's 1-800-FL-TODAY. 1-800-“F” as in family, “L” as in life, and then the word “TODAY”. There's also a video on the website for those who would like to watch a short video where you guys share your story. There may be people that folks would want to pass that video along to. Again, you'll find it online at FamilyLifeToday.com. As we're sharing your story this week I'm just reminded of our goal here at FamilyLife. We want to daily provide practical help and hope from the Bible so that husbands and wives, moms and dads know how to build a strong, healthy, godly marriage and family. Our goal is to effectively develop godly marriages and families—because we believe godly marriages and families change the world one home at a time. Our desire—in the months ahead—is to expand the outreach. We've seen God do some great things this past year with more people attending our Weekend to Remember® marriage getaways. 23:00 More people coming to our website—FamilyLifeToday.com—more ways that this daily program is reaching people—on their smartphones, on their tablets, through the radio. Those of you who support this ministry—you're helping us expand the reach of FamilyLife Today. At the beginning of this month we had a friend of the ministry who stepped forward and said, “I'd like to see it grow even more.” He offered to match every donation that we receive during the month of August—dollar for dollar—up to a total of $800,000. To take advantage of that matching gift, we need to hear from folks before this month ends—and this month ends in a couple of days. Today is a good day to go online and make a donation—and when you do, your donation will be doubled. You can donate online at FamilyLifeToday.com or you can call to donate at 1-800-FL-TODAY. Or mail your donation to us at FamilyLife Today at P.O. Box 7111 Little Rock, AR. The zip code is 72223. 24:00 As long as your letter is postmarked before the end of the month, it will qualify for that matching gift opportunity for us. Again, please pray that we'll be able to take full advantage of this matching gift. Please join us back tomorrow when we're going to hear more from Chris and Cindy Beall as they tell us about the process God has taken them through in rebuilding their broken marriage, better than new. That comes up tomorrow—hope you can be with us for that. I want to thank our engineer today, Keith Lynch, along with our entire broadcast production team. On behalf of our host, Dennis Rainey, I'm Bob Lepine. We will see you back next time for another edition of FamilyLife Today. FamilyLife Today is a production of FamilyLife of Little Rock, Arkansas. A Cru® ministry.Help for today. Hope for tomorrow. We are so happy to provide these transcripts to you. However, there is a cost to produce them for our website. If you've benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider donating today to help defray the costs? Copyright © 2017 FamilyLife. All rights reserved. www.FamilyLife.com

Rebuilding a Marriage Better Than New (Part 1) - Chris and Cindy Beall

Dennis & Barbara's Top 25 All-Time Interviews

Play Episode Listen Later Jan 3, 2020 26:24

Rebuilding a Marriage Better Than New (Part 1) - Chris and Cindy BeallRebuilding a Marriage Better Than New (Part 2) - Chris and Cindy BeallRebuilding a Marriage Better Than New (Part 3) - Chris and Cindy BeallFamilyLife Today® Radio Transcript References to conferences, resources, or other special promotions may be obsolete. Desperate for Freedom Guest: Chris & Cindy Beall From the series: Rebuilding a Marriage Better Than New (Day 1 of 3) Bob: Chris Beall had a secret and it came to a point where he realized as long as he kept his secret a secret—it was affecting his marriage and his spiritual life. Chris: All the things that God wanted to do in my life wouldn't happen until I had the courage to bring what was in the dark into the light. There's something about bringing it into the light—confessing it to another person and praying for each other—that brings an exposure and a healing. The moment that I took that step was the beginning of radical healing in my own heart. Bob: This is FamilyLife Today for Monday, August 28th. Our host is the President of FamilyLife®, Dennis Rainey, and I'm Bob Lepine. We'll learn about Chris Beall's secret today—and how it almost destroyed his marriage. Stay with us. 1:00 And welcome to FamilyLife Today. Thanks for joining us. We have a couple with us today who—some of our listeners will recognize them because their story. They've shared it on FamilyLife Today before. It's been shared as a part of The Stepping Up® Video Series. It's a great story of beauty coming from ashes. Dennis: It is indeed. We have the author of the book Rebuilding a Marriage Better Than New - Cindy Beall. Cindy, welcome back to the broadcast. Cindy: It's great to be here. Thanks for having me. Dennis: And her husband, Chris—welcome back to you as well. Chris: We are excited. We love you guys. Dennis: The Beall's have been married since 1993. They have three teenage sons and their story is one of the classics on FamilyLife Today in terms of God showing up and truly not only redeeming but reconciling their marriage. Bob: If our listeners would like to hear the complete story of what brought your marriage to the brink, 2:00 they can go to our website—FamilyLifeToday.com—and listen to the interviews we've done with you. But Chris, it's rooted in you growing up with the exposure to pornography that lead you to some dark places. Chris: Right. Eight years old I saw the first pornographic image—and for the next twenty years I was a prisoner—in one form or another—to the struggle. In 2002 we were invited to be a part of Life Church in Oklahoma City and we came. At that moment I really feel like there was kind of a do-over because I had an enormous amount of baggage and an enormous amount of lifestyle moral failures. Honestly, multiple affairs prior to us moving to Oklahoma City. Dennis: That weren't really known to anyone. Chris: Correct. It was total double life. Cindy knew something wasn't right in our marriage, didn't know exactly what that meant or what it looked like. 3:00 I would say that I was a master deceiver—of myself and other people—to keep those worlds separate—but it was when we came to Life Church that it really seemed like, “Okay, God. We thought we were coming to be the next worship leader at this church”—and the reality was God brought us there to heal us. That starts with the exposure of what the sin was. Bob: Cindy, for you that exposure came out of the blue one morning when your husband came home from work unexpectedly and said, “We need to talk.” You had no idea was coming. Cindy: I had no idea. As he began to unfold the things he just shared with you—the pornography addiction, the infidelity—as he began to say all those things, things just started happening in my mind. Of course, instant desperation, despair, everything terrible you can imagine that you could think, I thought it—but at the same time was—”Oh, it's making sense now.” 4:00 Because it wasn't our entire nine years of marriage leading up to this point—it was about a two and one half year period of really intense difficulty—so it was a total shock. I would never have imagined that he would have gone this far—this deep—into such a wretched place. Dennis: You knew at that point that something was missing in your marriage. You just couldn't say, “This is it”—but all of a sudden it was disclosed. Cindy: Absolutely. Chris: Correct. Cindy: For me, I remembered during that two and a half year period I felt very alone where we were in our church. My husband was the worship pastor, the youth pastor and so I really—people looked to me—so who am I going to talk to? I just—it was really a lonely place for me so I became very well acquainted with my heavenly Father. He became everything to me. I remember just praying, “God, something's wrong. Something's wrong.” I just remember Him saying, “Trust me. Trust me.” 5:00 So, I believed that had we not come to Oklahoma, been a part of Life Church—under Craig and Emily Groshell—that we might not have survived this. Chris: I remember seeing a book that was always next to Cindy's chair during her quiet times in the mornings during those two and a half years that I was living this double life. It was the Power of a Praying Wife. Dennis: Yes. Bob: Yes. Chris: I will tell you, looking back, my wife was praying God's word over my life in the period that I was the most prodigal that I had ever been. I know we're going to get to this, but I truly believe where we are today—there are so many things how the church responded—partly how I responded—but I believe it all started with the fact that I had a wife that was praying—in the darkest place of my rebellion—my wife was praying and believing God's word and speaking promises over my life that ultimately I became those prayers. Dennis: FamilyLife has known as an organization for bringing practical, Biblical, help and hope to couples. 6:00 I just have to say what you two modeled—as you faced this deep, dark valley of despair—how you modeled repentance, Chris, and how you modeled grace and forgiveness and steadfast commitment to move forward in your marriage and how the church offered healing and how they helped restore—first of all, Chris, you to a right standing before God—but then secondly, restore your marriage and your family. I would just encourage listeners—because we're not going to continue to unpack all the details of what they did in the previous broadcast, go listen to that broadcast that they did. What I want to unpack is how God met you in that deep wound and brought deep healing. Bob: Cindy—that started that morning when your husband comes home. He is transparent about everything that has gone on. 7:00 You find out about multiple affairs. You find out that he has fathered a son—who is living in another state. This is all new to you. You had two big questions right in front of you that day. The first one is,” How do we handle this in the short term?”—because the news is going to come out that the worship pastor at the big church in town that he's not the worship pastor anymore and we have to figure out what we have to do with that—but then,” Do I even stay married to this man?” There's a Biblical case to be made for you to say, “We're done here. I'm moving on.” Cindy: Yes, and that honestly, as much as I loved him, I literally thought, “I don't think my heart can take this. I think it would be best to just cut my losses—move back to Texas. I just have one child; I can manage being a single mom.” I started immediately— I'm a planner—I'm proud of being a planner, but sometimes it gets me going on the wrong track and I start planning and not including God in the scenario—but I—I'm telling you—I began thinking, “What am I going to do?” 8:00 Thinking—just because I didn't leave our marriage—at the time we were still living in the same house—mainly because we couldn't afford to do anything different. I just felt like the Father was like, “Hello? I'm still here. Are you going to ask Me about this?” Sure enough, I was like, “Okay God. What do you think I should do?” I just kept asking that question. I just remember Him saying, “Remember when you said would do anything to bring Me glory?” I was like, “Well, yes—but I was meaning easier things, like something simpler.” God just began to stir in me—and through a long series of events that I wrote about in my first book—I talk about how God met me and He spoke the word to me about staying the course and trusting in Him and trusting Him for the vision that He would unfold. So three weeks later I said, “Okay God, I trust you.”—because I certainly didn't trust him— 9:00 —I had to trust my heavenly Father. He is the only one 100% trustworthy—so that was the beginning of that. Bob: So it was a three week period, basically—from the time you heard this until said, “Okay, I'm going to stick with this.” Cindy: Correct. Bob: Was, “I'm going to stick with it,”—was that, “I'm in this until the end,” or was this, “I'll stick with this for six more months and see what happens?” Cindy: It was for the end—it was until the end. Habakkuk 2:3 says, “For the vision is yet for the appointed time. Though it linger, wait for it. It will certainly come. It will not delay.” That was the Scripture that I had been basically begging God for. I just didn't know it was going to be through a minor prophet of a name that most people can't pronounce—and certainly we don't read about him. I mean, it's Habakkuk!—but God spoke to me through that. That's what I have stood on for 15 years. Dennis: I just want you to unpack—what gave you the courage during that three week process to take that step of faith to move toward healing? 10:00 You've mentioned you had a relationship with God and you had a heart that was open—teachable—willing to do what God asked you to do. What else did He bring your way to make that a reasonable step of faith? Cindy: Well, He brought people. There was a couple that really walked with us—they had already experienced infidelity in their marriage like twenty years prior, so they were with us—they were walking through it with us—encouraging us. One of the pastors on the team—as I was that three week period I kept—as I said I am a planner, I wanted to kind of know what the rest of my life would look like—which is a ludicrous thing—but I was thinking, “I need to know. I need to know,” and he just looked at me and he said, “Cindy, you don't have to decide the rest of your life today.” So that thought kind of carried me each day until I knew that I had heard from God to stay in my marriage because there were people with opinions everywhere. Anybody can give you an opinion. Well, you need to leave. Once a cheater, always a cheater. He's going to do this again—and there's so many things. Dennis: You heard that from Christians? 11:00 Cindy: Oh, yes. I mean—of course—and had I not gone through something like this, I can't say I wouldn't have thought the same thing. We shoot our wounded as Christians, sadly, but trying not to decide the rest of my life for that season really did help me and take those steps. Dennis: I want to point out three things here real quickly. First of all, you had counsel to hang in there—people who had been wounded themselves. And secondly they shared their own wounds with you which had been adultery—a lack of faithfulness. I am thinking of a couple, Bob, that you and I both know who have been very open about an error the husband made in their relationship, and their marriage has now been used to literally touch hundreds of other couples, both here in America, and internationally as they're willing to open their hearts and admit something that is really kind of ugly. We kind of are repulsed by it. 12:00 I just want to say to those listeners who have this as a part of your past—I'm not encouraging you to boast about it—but I am encouraging you to boast about God's redemption, His reconciliation, and how He brings hope where there is despair—because there are listeners who are listening to us right now who are despairing and who need hope. That's the third thing that you mentioned, Cindy—that I just want to underline. You were willing to admit you didn't know what your future held, but you were willing to step out in faith. I think it was Martin Luther King, I believe, who made this statement. “Faith is taking the first step on the staircase without being able to see all the other steps.” I like that because you took that first step on a staircase—you didn't know where it was going to lead you. Cindy: Absolutely. I kind of picture God's hands under my feet— 13:00 —and one foot is on one hand and it's there when I step. Then the next one—it's not ready until I lift—the ever progressing thing that I am on with God. Bob: The river doesn't part until you step into the water. Cindy: That's right. Bob: And those who are standing on the shore waiting for the Jordan River to part—no, you have to step in the water before God does that work. What's going on with you in this three week period while she's trying to decide “Do I stay or do I go?” Chris: So I obviously want the marriage to survive—I mean desperately—but here's the thing. Dennis: Now wait a second—that's not necessarily obvious. Bob: There are some guys who are ready for it to be over. Chris: Okay. Well, the context of my struggle was not fueled by a lack of intimacy at home. I had a deep emptiness in my heart. Here's the thing—I have struggled since I was a kid feeling like I was a failure—do I measure up? 14:00 I love my wife. I know my actions don't show that, but she was my best friend. I would choose to spend time with her. The thing is, I allowed this sense of inadequacy to need to be medicated. What happened was in a weird way these images on a screen momentarily made me feel a little bit more like a man—and then I felt less of a man. So it creates this spiral and this cycle of darkness. The relationship with other women was the fact that I don't like who I am—but this other person is drawn to me or likes me. That's ultimately—I'm trying to medicate my own internal emptiness. It was just a deep dark place that I was trying to heal it though everyone other that the source of that healing—which is God. Bob: Right. Chris: So as Cindy is going through this process of, “Do I want to stay? Is this marriage going to work?” I deeply wanted that to work. 15:00 But what I wanted even more—I wanted to be free—because I've been a prisoner most of my life. I‘ve been a prisoner of sin, I've been a prisoner of habitual behaviors that for whichever reason, I just can't seem to be able to break out of. As much as I want my marriage to work, I had nothing to offer Cindy and I have nothing to offer for my boys unless I am walking in freedom. I was desperate. This is my shot and I want to be free. There's really two things that were significant in those early days for me. One is that I allowed myself to let my heart break for what I had done to the heart of God and what I had done to the heart of the people I loved the most. Paul talked about the difference between worldly sorrow and Godly sorrow. He writes this letter to the Corinthians. He says, “I'm not sorry that what I said brought you sorrow, for Godly sorrow leaves no regret and brings about repentance”. 16:00 Repentance is a military term that really—it's literally an about face—I'm going to turn 180 degrees from the direction that I am going—and I am going to turn completely to God. But worldly sorrow is really more of a, “I'm inconvenienced by the consequence of my sin,” and that leads—Paul says—to death. So I just let my heart break. I was a puddle of emotion for quite some time—I think that process was extremely necessary for me to go through. It wasn't that I was putting condemnation and shame on myself, but I was allowing my heart to break for what broke the heart of God. Bob: You were at a crossroads—and I've met guys at this crossroads. You had been successfully managing your sin for two and a half years. Chris: Correct. Bob: You'd been playing this so they're the only one who knows and you're maneuvering your way through it. 17:00 Now you're at a point where, “Do I keep trying to manage this? Or do I mortify it?”—which means to put it to death. I heard one guy describe it this way. It's like a rabid dog that you keep in a cage over in the corner of the house and you go, “As long as he's in the cage, he can't hurt me. I'll get it out every once in a while and play with it and then put it back in the cage.” Well, that dog gets bigger and sicker and one of these days is going to kill you. Chris: Right. Bob: So the thing you have to do with the dog is you have to kill the dog. Chris: Right. Bob: You were at the crossroads where, “I cannot manage this anymore. I have to put this to death.” I'm imagining, Chris, even in that moment, you don't really know your heart—“Do I really want to put this to death?” Or, “I'm where I am and I feel bad, this will last for a while then I'll be right back to it.” Chris Monday morning I'm sitting in a staff meeting with Chris Groshell—who is my boss—and I can't say enough about how God used this man in our marriage. He made a comment in that staff meeting and— 18:00 —he said to our team that, “It is our private integrity that gives us the ability to minister publically, so we have to keep it clean. We have to. The stakes are so high.” He said, “If you are walking in sin—it's going to find you out. Confess it, and you'll find grace.” That was on a Monday. I had been at that church for six weeks with this looming cloud of, “I'm going to get found out.” That was on a Monday. It was on a Tuesday that I'm like, “I can't do this anymore.” I just really believed that all the things that God wanted to do in my life wouldn't happen until I had the courage to bring what was in the dark into the light. James, “Confess your sins one to another and pray for one another that you may be healed.” This whole time that I was in sin, I would drive home from having sinned and I'm confessing to God. 19:00 “God, heal me. Please don't let me ever do this again.” There's not a Scripture in the Bible that says confess to the Lord for healing. We confess to God for forgiveness but there's something about bringing it into the light and confessing it to another person and praying for each other that brings an exposure and a healing. The moment that I took that step was the beginning of radical healing in my own heart. Cindy: I kind of equate it to—he got to the point that Tuesday morning—that he wanted freedom so desperately that he was willing to risk everything to get it—including our marriage. I know that you've got listeners right now listening to this broadcast and they are in a world of hurt and sick in bondage. They don't hate their sin enough. When we come to the place where we hate it enough, we'll do anything to find freedom. Hopefully somebody listening can take that step today. 20:00 Dennis: Chris mentioned freedom. I immediately thought of Galatians chapter 5 verse 1. It says, “For freedom Christ has set us free; stand firm therefore, and do not submit again to a yoke of slavery.” There are undoubtedly listeners right now who are listening and they have never really met Jesus Christ and understood His love, His forgiveness, His mercy, His grace, His redemption—that He offers to people to step out of the prison that they are in and be set free. I would just challenge you if you are in this situation now, it may be time for you to settle things with God. Chris was talking about settling things with the person you have offended. It may be important for you to first of all settle the issues with the God you've offended. 21:00 Then secondly, after that relationship has been established—because that is what the Christian life is—it's beginning a journey of following Christ—not perfectly—but you're following the perfect Savior who now lives in you. Then go to your spouse—and there's where as a couple you have to embrace the same Jesus Christ who set you free—you have to express forgiveness to one another. Ephesians chapter 4 talks about forgiving one another just as God in Christ has forgiven you. That's your command. Forgiveness means you give up the right to punish the other person. I wish you could see Cindy's nodding head right now—she's smiling and nodding. She had to repeatedly give up the right to punish Chris. Bob: The verse I'm thinking of that the two of you have modeled in this entire story is Ephesians 5:11 that says, “Take no part in the unfruitful works of darkness, but instead expose them.” 22:00 That's what you guys choose to do. This week we'll get a chance to follow you on that journey and hear how God was at work in both of your lives as you moved forward. In fact, Chris and Cindy have shared the story in a book that Cindy has written that's called Rebuilding a Marriage Better Than New. We've got copies of the book in our FamilyLifeToday Resource Center. Go online at FamilyLifeToday.com if you'd like to get a copy or call 1-800-FL-TODAY to receive a copy. Again the website is FamilyLifeToday.com, you can order online. Or you can call to order at 1-800-358-6329. 1-800-F as in family, “L” as in life, and then the word TODAY. Again I'll mention—on our website we've got a short video clip where you guys share your story—listeners may want to view that. They may know somebody they'd like to pass that clip on to. Again you'll find it at FamilyLifeToday.com. 23:00 Well, this is the home stretch week for us here at FamilyLife—it's the last week of August. We just have a few days left to hear from listeners if we're going to be able to take full advantage of the matching gift opportunity that was extended to us back at the beginning of the month. We had a friend of the ministry who came along and agreed he would match every donation we received this month on a dollar for dollar basis up to a total of $800,000. Now those matching funds will enable us to be able to reach more people more often with this radio program, through our website, through our events and our resources. You can help extend the reach of this ministry by making a donation and having your donation be effectively doubled because of the matching gift opportunity—but you need to do it before the end of the month—and the end of the month is this week. So today is a good day to go to FamilyLifeToday.com and make an online donation or call to donate at 1-800-FL-TODAY. 24:00 Or you can mail your donation to us at FamilyLife Today at P.O. Box 7111, Little Rock, AR. Our zip code is 72223. Please do pray that we would get the necessary funds this week and be able to take full advantage of that match. We appreciate you. We hope you can join us back tomorrow. We are going to continue to follow Chris and Cindy Beall as they take us through the process they've been through in rebuilding a broken marriage. Hope you can join us back tomorrow for that. Bob: I want to thank our engineer today, Keith Lynch, and our entire broadcast production team. On behalf of our host, Dennis Rainey, I'm Bob Lepine. We will see you next time for another edition of FamilyLife Today. FamilyLife Today is a production of FamilyLife of Little Rock, Arkansas.Help for today. Hope for tomorrow. We are so happy to provide these transcripts to you. However, there is a cost to produce them for our website. If you've benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider donating today to help defray the costs? Copyright © 2017 FamilyLife. All rights reserved. www.FamilyLife.com

297 "Help! I my spouse is looking at porn... AGAIN!!?" Cindy Beall REBEL Parenting

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Play Episode Listen Later Nov 26, 2019 41:54

Episode 3 - Effects on Marriage

No Porn Marriage

Play Episode Listen Later Nov 1, 2019

Like mold on dinner, pornography can spoil the precious gift of intimacy in your marriage. Chris and Cindy Beall discuss how sexual addiction led him to have an affair; Jonathan Daugherty tells the story of how pornography nearly cost him his marriage; and Greg and Erin share more of their story of taking steps toward healing.

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EP. 61 | Molly Allen [Choosing Life When Things Get Dark]

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Play Episode Listen Later Sep 17, 2019 50:55

Truth? It's hard to talk about anxiety and depression, especially that which knocks on even darker doors. But we need to talk about it. We MUST talk about it. A week ago, Cindy Beall and I sat down with Molly Allen as she shared her powerful story. A story of generational wounds, recently triggered by [...] The post EP. 61 | Molly Allen [Choosing Life When Things Get Dark] appeared first on Jenn Jewell.

Clearing Our Conscience

FamilyLife This Week®

Play Episode Listen Later Aug 3, 2019 28:00

Discover the incredible value of living in the freedom of a clear conscience with God and others. Our guests, Erwin Lutzer, Eric Mason, Chris and Cindy Beall, and Paul David Tripp offer biblical insight and heartfelt transparency. Show Notes and Resources Dr. Erwin Lutzer shares what it means to live in the freedom of a clear conscience to others and to God. (26 min. podcast) https://www.familylife.com/podcast/familylife-today/finding-freedom-from-your-past/ Read "3 Characteristics of a Repentant Spouse." If you want a strong marriage, there comes a time to be honest about yourself. (6 min. read) https://www.familylife.com/articles/topics/marriage/staying-married/forgiveness/3-characteristics-of-a-repentant-spouse/ Listen to Chris and Cindy Beall's story "Healing Your Marriage When Trust is Broken." (25 min. podcast) https://www.familylife.com/podcast/familylife-today/caught-in-a-web-of-deception/ How to Know God. What is Christianity? https://www.cru.org/us/en/how-to-know-god.html

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EP. 58 | Britanie Ramirez [Becoming Fosters]

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Play Episode Listen Later Jun 17, 2019 56:21

Hello friend! You might notice we're posting this week's episode a tad early, because SUMMER. We also believe you need these words in your earbuds as quickly as possible! Today at The Messy Table, Cindy Beall and I are chatting with a real-life hero who's teaching us a thing or two about brokenness and belonging. [...] The post EP. 58 | Britanie Ramirez [Becoming Fosters] appeared first on Jenn Jewell.

Principles of Addiction Recovery – What Every Mother Needs to Know

The Mission Driven Mom

Play Episode Listen Later Feb 26, 2019 33:46

“Lack of power, that was our dilemma. We had to find a power by which we could live, and it had to be a Power greater than ourselves.” ~Alcoholics Anonymous Have you ever felt afraid or powerless when it comes to addiction--afraid there's nothing you can do to protect your family? At times, addiction may seem like a mystery. It may be be unaware of what's really going on in our own homes. As mothers, we need to understand addiction in order to fortify our families and know how to help them when they struggle. The GREAT NEWS is that just as in other keys areas of life, there are guiding principles surrounding addiction. There is hope because we can learn and live these principles, then teach them to our families and strengthen them against addiction -- helping them know how to stay free from addiction's bonds. The key is having an intimate understanding of the triggers of addiction and their corresponding antidotes. These empower us to see what's behind the addictive behavior to what is really happening in the hearts of minds of those battling addiction. Once we can diagnose the spiritual issue, we can use these anecdotes to provide clarity and needed changes. When partnered with the 12 Steps Program and effective sponsorship, every addict can find permanent sobriety! In this podcast, Audrey Rindlisbacher will share foundational principles of addiction. Through personal experience, Audrey is here to tell us there is hope, there are guiding principles we can stand on, and, ultimately, there is a higher Power we can reach up to for that change of heart we seek in ourselves and those we love. Listener's Guide: Use the time stamps below to skip to any part of the podcast. 2:24 Why it's crucial to recognize and treat addiction as a spiritual illness 5:06 The story of Cindy Beall, author of Healing Your Marriage When Trust is Broken 10:16 How to dispel the mystery surrounding addiction by understanding foundational principles of addiction 15:25 Why belief in a higher power is essential to addiction recovery 19:53 Trigger #1: Resentment 22:33 Trigger #2: Selfishness 24:05 Trigger #3: Self-pity 26:25 Trigger #4: Dishonesty 27:54 Trigger #5: Fear 33:45 How to arm your children by teaching them to manage these triggers and apply the corresponding antidotes Quotes from this Episode: “Lack of power, that was our dilemma. We had to find a power by which we could live, and it had to be a Power greater than ourselves.” ~Alcoholics Anonymous “So our troubles, we think, are basically of our own making. They arise out of ourselves, and the alcoholic is an extreme example of self-will run riot, though he usually does not think so. Above everything, we alcoholics must be rid of this selfishness. We must, or it kills us! God makes that possible.” ~Alcoholics Anonymous “Resentment is the ‘number one' offender. It destroys more alcoholics than anything else. From it stems all forms of spiritual disease, for we have been not only mentally and physically ill, we have been spiritually sick. When the spiritual malady is overcome, we straighten out mentally and physically.” ~Alcoholics Anonymous “I would respect you if you felt that you needed to remove yourself from your marriage. What you've endured is very hard. But you are not a fool to stay and be a part of the redemptive work in man's life.” ~Pastor Dan to Cindy Beall “As I drove back to Georgetown that afternoon, I heard God's voice over and over and over in my head. ‘Do you trust Me?' I was hesitant to answer Him; I knew what saying yes would mean. It would mean staying in a marriage that was deeply wounded, nearly destroyed. It would mean forgiving a man for breaking his marriage vows over and over again. It would mean remaining in a trustless marriage until Chris could build that trust back up, which may take the rest of his life. But after wrestling in prayer and remembering the promises that God had made to me in His Word...

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EP. 50 | Julie Richard [Fearless Moms + Strong-Willed Children]

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Play Episode Listen Later Feb 26, 2019 54:53

Mamas! (Biological! Adoptive! Foster!) Grandmothers! Aunts! Teachers! Pastors! Mentors! Babysitters! Basically, if you interact with kids, LISTEN UP. Julie Richard, the humble and hilarious mastermind behind the ministry Fearless Mom, is joining Cindy Beall and me for a chat at The Messy Table. In this episode (number 50, y'all!), Julie is sharing her perspective on [...] The post EP. 50 | Julie Richard [Fearless Moms + Strong-Willed Children] appeared first on Jenn Jewell.

128 Rebuilding Your Marriage After Porn - Cindy Beall REBEL Parenting

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Play Episode Listen Later Dec 19, 2018 28:54

EP. 45 | Tiffany Cooper [Responding to Stress + Refusing Isolation]

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Play Episode Listen Later Dec 11, 2018 46:03

How do you respond to stress? Do you jump into "busy mode," retreat in isolation, scream at the top of your lungs, or keep calm and carry on? Today at The Messy Table, Cindy Beall and I are chatting with the lovely Tiffany Cooper. Tiffany is a pastor's wife, mama of four, and co-founder of [...] The post EP. 45 | Tiffany Cooper [Responding to Stress + Refusing Isolation] appeared first on Jenn Jewell.

108 HELP!! I caught my spouse looking at PORN... AGAIN! Cindy Beall REBEL Parenting - Rebel Parenting

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Play Episode Listen Later Sep 6, 2018 48:15

EP. 38 | Nicole Knox [Clinging to Hope in Sickness and in Health]

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Play Episode Listen Later Sep 4, 2018 45:51

Anyone else like being in control? I know I do! But what happens when life spirals out of your grasp and you're left with more questions than answers? What happens when the rubber meets the road—when your faith smashes into your reality? Today, Cindy Beall and I are chatting with our friend, Nicole Knox, who's [...] The post EP. 38 | Nicole Knox [Clinging to Hope in Sickness and in Health] appeared first on Jenn Jewell.

How to Overcome Unforgiveness

MarriageToday Audio Podcast

Play Episode Listen Later May 7, 2018 27:57

Forgiving someone who has hurt you can be very difficult. The reality is unforgiveness affects every relationship in your life. Jimmy Evans shares the steps to forgiving others and why it's so important.

EP. 27 | Lori Wilhite [Fighting from Victory

Play Episode Listen Later Mar 20, 2018 52:12

Have you ever felt like you're JUST NOT ENOUGH? Not enough of a wife, mom, friend, leader, girlboss, homemaker, Christ-follower, fill-in-the-blank... Today at The Messy Table, Cindy Beall (from Episode 11!) is co-hosting with me as we chat with the amazing Lori Wilhite. In this episode, Lori vulnerably shares her own journey from insecurity to [...] The post EP. 27 | Lori Wilhite [Fighting from Victory appeared first on Jenn Jewell.

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Best of Podcast: When You Feel Like You’ve Outgrown Each Other: Interview with Chris Beall

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Play Episode Listen Later Dec 23, 2017 28:55

This is a podcast that aired earlier this year that we wanted to highlight again because of the incredible feedback we received. In this podcast we have special guest Pastor Chris Beall with Dr. Kim. Chris Beall is the Oklahoma City Campus Pastor at LifeChurch.tv. Chris also oversees half of the OKC metro LifeChurch.tv campuses. Chris is married to Cindy Beall. Chris joins Dr. Kim as they talk about the struggle of when couples feel like they have outgrown each other. They discuss barriers to closeness in marriage and how to stick together even when things are tough. Tune in below to learn more about what to do when you feel like you’ve outgrown each other! RESOURCES You can connect with Pastor Chris on Facebook and on Twitter.

Best of Podcast: When You Feel Like You've Outgrown Each Other: Interview with Chris Beall

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Play Episode Listen Later Dec 23, 2017 28:55

This is a podcast that aired earlier this year that we wanted to highlight again because of the incredible feedback we received. In this podcast we have special guest Pastor Chris Beall with Dr. Kim. Chris Beall is the Oklahoma City Campus Pastor at LifeChurch.tv. Chris also oversees half of the OKC metro LifeChurch.tv campuses. Chris is married to Cindy Beall. Chris joins Dr. Kim as they talk about the struggle of when couples feel like they have outgrown each other. They discuss barriers to closeness in marriage and how to stick together even when things are tough. Tune in below to learn more about what to do when you feel like you've outgrown each other! RESOURCES You can connect with Pastor Chris on Facebook and on Twitter.

How to Overcome Unforgiveness

MarriageToday with Jimmy & Karen Evans Video Podcast

Play Episode Listen Later Dec 18, 2017 28:30

Forgiving someone can be very difficult. Unforgiveness affects every relationship in your life. Pastors Chris and Cindy Beall share how they survived multiple affairs and began to forgive.

How to Overcome Unforgiveness

MarriageToday with Jimmy & Karen Evans Video Podcast

Play Episode Listen Later Dec 18, 2017 28:30

Forgiving someone can be very difficult. Unforgiveness affects every relationship in your life. Pastors Chris and Cindy Beall share how they survived multiple affairs and began to forgive.

Best of Podcast: Healing Your Marriage When Trust Is Broken - Interview with Cindy Beall

Play Episode Listen Later Nov 4, 2017 27:15

This is a podcast that aired last year that we wanted to highlight again because of the impact it had the first time. We know this conversation can benefit so many couples out there struggling after trust has been broken. In this podcast we have Cindy Beall speaking with Dr. Kim. Cindy joins Dr. Kim as they talk about Cindy's book, Healing Your Marriage When Trust Is Broken. Cindy is a writer, speaker and mentor to women. She oversees the Equipping arm on the Leading & Loving It team that ministers to pastor's wives and women in ministry. Cindy is married to her husband Chris, who serves as the Oklahoma City Campus Pastor at LifeChurch.tv and also oversees half of the OKC metro LifeChurch.tv campuses. Tune in below to learn more about how God healed Cindy's marriage after the devastating news of an affair. RESOURCES You can purchase Cindy's book, Healing Your Marriage When Trust Is Broken. You can hear more great insights from Cindy on her blog. You can also follow her on Twitter and Facebook. Cindy shared some great scripture with us including Psalm 27 and 2 Corinthians 1:3-4.

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Best of Podcast: Healing Your Marriage When Trust Is Broken - Interview with Cindy Beall

Ask a Christian Counselor: Christian Counseling | Biblical Counseling | Marriage and Family | Mental Health | Christianity

Play Episode Listen Later Nov 4, 2017 27:15

This is a podcast that aired last year that we wanted to highlight again because of the impact it had the first time. We know this conversation can benefit so many couples out there struggling after trust has been broken. In this podcast we have Cindy Beall speaking with Dr. Kim. Cindy joins Dr. Kim as they talk about Cindy’s book, Healing Your Marriage When Trust Is Broken. Cindy is a writer, speaker and mentor to women. She oversees the Equipping arm on the Leading & Loving It team that ministers to pastor’s wives and women in ministry. Cindy is married to her husband Chris, who serves as the Oklahoma City Campus Pastor at LifeChurch.tv and also oversees half of the OKC metro LifeChurch.tv campuses. Tune in below to learn more about how God healed Cindy’s marriage after the devastating news of an affair. RESOURCES You can purchase Cindy’s book, Healing Your Marriage When Trust Is Broken. You can hear more great insights from Cindy on her blog. You can also follow her on Twitter and Facebook. Cindy shared some great scripture with us including Psalm 27 and 2 Corinthians 1:3-4.

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Rebuilding Trust

Play Episode Listen Later Jul 23, 2017 20:00

In this episode, Tres describes how we can rebuild trust after it has been broken. He talks about how forgiveness and trust intersect, and the process a couple can take as they recover from a major breach of trust. A rundown of this episode: 0:03 - New music for the intro! 0:20 - More recordings on the field in future episodes. 2:09 - Relax to the sounds of an Arizona monsoon rainstorm. 2:56 - The 5th anniversary of the podcast is coming soon. 5:10 - How the issue of trust comes up a lot in couples counseling. 9:15 - An analogy that explains how trust grows. 13:09 - Tres gives an illustration on trust by telling the story of how he adopted his cat, Majerle. 16:10 - Surrendering to God. Resources mentioned: Boundaries by Henry Cloud and John Townsend Boundaries in Marriage by Henry Cloud and John Townsend Healing Your Marriage When Trust is Broken by Cindy Beall

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EP. 11 | Cindy Beall [Better Than New]

Play Episode Listen Later Jul 13, 2017 59:26

Hello hello! It's a great day to be at The Messy Table, y'all. So grab (or reheat) your coffee and pull up a chair. No matter what trenches you're climbing out of today, know that you are welcome in this space. It is my complete HONOR to introduce you to my guest for Episode #11. Cindy Beall is [...] The post EP. 11 | Cindy Beall [Better Than New] appeared first on Jenn Jewell.

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When Codependency Is Corrupting Your Marriage - Interview with Chris Beall | Ep. 51

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Play Episode Listen Later Mar 28, 2017 25:18

Today on the podcast we welcome back special guest Pastor Chris Beall with Dr. Kim. Chris Beall is the Oklahoma City Campus Pastor at LifeChurch.tv. Chris also oversees half of the OKC metro LifeChurch.tv campuses. Chris is married to Cindy Beall. Chris joins Dr. Kim today as they talk about codependency and how it can affect a marriage. They define codependency, discuss different types of codependency, and give warnings of things to watch out for to protect your marriage from it. The give practical advice on what to do if codependency is affecting your marriage. Tune in below to learn more about codependency in marriage! RESOURCES You can connect with Pastor Chris on Facebook and on Twitter.

When Codependency Is Corrupting Your Marriage - Interview with Chris Beall | Ep. 51

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Play Episode Listen Later Mar 28, 2017 25:18

When You Feel Like You’ve Outgrown Each Other - Interview with Chris Beall | Ep. 49

Play Episode Listen Later Mar 21, 2017 28:18

Today on the podcast we welcome special guest Pastor Chris Beall with Dr. Kim. Chris Beall is the Oklahoma City Campus Pastor at LifeChurch.tv. Chris also oversees half of the OKC metro LifeChurch.tv campuses. Chris is married to Cindy Beall. Chris joins Dr. Kim today as they talk about the struggle of when couples feel like they have outgrown each other. They discuss barriers to closeness in marriage and how to stick together even when things are tough. Tune in below to learn more about what to do when you feel like you’ve outgrown each other! RESOURCES You can connect with Pastor Chris on Facebook and on Twitter.

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When You Feel Like You've Outgrown Each Other - Interview with Chris Beall | Ep. 49

MarriageToday with Jimmy & Karen Evans Video Podcast

Play Episode Listen Later Mar 21, 2017 28:18

Today on the podcast we welcome special guest Pastor Chris Beall with Dr. Kim. Chris Beall is the Oklahoma City Campus Pastor at LifeChurch.tv. Chris also oversees half of the OKC metro LifeChurch.tv campuses. Chris is married to Cindy Beall. Chris joins Dr. Kim today as they talk about the struggle of when couples feel like they have outgrown each other. They discuss barriers to closeness in marriage and how to stick together even when things are tough. Tune in below to learn more about what to do when you feel like you've outgrown each other! RESOURCES You can connect with Pastor Chris on Facebook and on Twitter.

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How to Overcome Unforgiveness

Play Episode Listen Later Feb 28, 2017 28:30

Forgiving someone can be very difficult. Unforgiveness affects every relationship in your life. Pastors Chris and Cindy Beall share how they survived multiple affairs and began to forgive.

How to Overcome Unforgiveness

MarriageToday with Jimmy & Karen Evans Video Podcast

Play Episode Listen Later Feb 28, 2017 28:30

Forgiving someone can be very difficult. Unforgiveness affects every relationship in your life. Pastors Chris and Cindy Beall share how they survived multiple affairs and began to forgive.

REBEL Parenting 0001 Cindy Beall - Rebel Parenting

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Play Episode Listen Later Nov 3, 2016 27:55

220 - Cindy Beall

Clutter Free Academy

Play Episode Listen Later Oct 2, 2016 26:50

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26: Healing Your Marriage After Infidelity with Cindy Beall

Vibrant Happy Women

Play Episode Listen Later Sep 6, 2016 34:13

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Rebuilding a Marriage Better Than New - Interview with Cindy Beall | Ep. 19

Play Episode Listen Later Aug 30, 2016 39:33

This week on the Awesome Marriage Podcast we welcome back writer, speaker and mentor to women, Cindy Beall. Cindy joins Dr. Kim as they talk about Cindy’s latest book, Rebuilding a Marriage Better Than New. Cindy oversees the Equipping arm on the Leading & Loving It team that ministers to pastor’s wives and women in ministry. Cindy is married to her husband Chris, who serves as the Oklahoma City Campus Pastor at LifeChurch.tv and also oversees half of the OKC metro LifeChurch.tv campuses. Tune in below to learn more about what Cindy and Chris did to heal their marriage better than new. RESOURCES You can purchase Cindy’s book, Rebuilding a Marriage Better Than New. You can hear more great insights from Cindy on her blog. You can also follow her on Twitter and Facebook.

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Rebuilding a Marriage Better Than New - Interview with Cindy Beall | Ep. 19

Play Episode Listen Later Aug 30, 2016 39:33

This week on the Awesome Marriage Podcast we welcome back writer, speaker and mentor to women, Cindy Beall. Cindy joins Dr. Kim as they talk about Cindy's latest book, Rebuilding a Marriage Better Than New. Cindy oversees the Equipping arm on the Leading & Loving It team that ministers to pastor's wives and women in ministry. Cindy is married to her husband Chris, who serves as the Oklahoma City Campus Pastor at LifeChurch.tv and also oversees half of the OKC metro LifeChurch.tv campuses. Tune in below to learn more about what Cindy and Chris did to heal their marriage better than new. RESOURCES You can purchase Cindy's book, Rebuilding a Marriage Better Than New. You can hear more great insights from Cindy on her blog. You can also follow her on Twitter and Facebook.

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Healing Your Marriage When Trust Is Broken - Interview with Cindy Beall | Ep. 18

Play Episode Listen Later Aug 23, 2016 37:10

This week on theAwesome MarriagePodcast we welcomewriter, speaker and mentor towomen, Cindy Beall. Cindyjoins Dr. Kim as they talk about Cindy's book, Healing YourMarriage When Trust Is Broken. Cindy oversees the Equipping armon the Leading & Loving It team that ministers to pastor'swives and women in ministry. Cindy is married to her husband Chris,who serves as the Oklahoma City Campus Pastor at LifeChurch.tv andalso oversees half of the OKC metro LifeChurch.tv campuses. Tune in below to learn moreabout how God healed Cindy's marriage after the devastating news ofan affair. RESOURCES You can purchase Cindy's book, Healing Your Marriage When Trust Is Broken. You can hear more great insights from Cindy on her blog. You can also follow her on Twitter and Facebook. Cindy shared some great scripture with us including Psalm 27 and 2 Corinthians 1:3-4.

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Healing Your Marriage When Trust Is Broken - Interview with Cindy Beall | Ep. 18