Our Friendly World with Fawn and Matt

The whole platform for our podcast is the art of friendship, and at the root is the art of communication.In discussing self-awareness, taking a look at ourselves and how we operate. Getting to know who we truly are, how we react to things, what our history is, why we think a certain way, why we act a certain way, what makes us introverted?What makes us like an outgoing person? What makes us want to do what we're doing? Like, where does all that come from? Understanding that will help us to understand others. SELF: (noun) a person's essential being that distinguishes them from others, especially considered as the object of introspection or reflexive action. A person's particular nature or personality, the quality that makes a person individual or unique. One's own interests or pleasure used ironically to refer to oneself as someone else. Like for example, "The only side worth supporting is your own sweet self. "Okay, SELF (verb): Self Pollinate Self-fertilize. Here's an example. " A variety that selfs itself loses lots of vigor in the progeny".SELF: (adjective) of a trimming or cover of the same material and color as the rest of the item. "A dress with self belt". link in the show notes https://www.estherperel.com/.do you feel like growing up you had protection more or did you have connection more like a sense of togetherness? Did you feel more protection from the family or did you feel a sense of connection and togetherness?what are your expectations of a friendship? Pick up a free copy of Fawn's workbook on making friends: https://www.ourfriendlyworldpodcast.com/ CALL TO ACTION: PLEASE SHARE OUR PODCAST WITH OTHERS

Defining friendship, we can see it as a combination of generosity and intimacy. How do we show up? How do we think we show up in every relationship and what value do we offer?On our podcast, we always tell you about the number one friend, number two friend and number three friend based on Aristotle's Nichomachian Ethics. Should we always be the kind of person people like to hang out with? That's one of our goals, being thoughtful about how we make another person feel. If someone is seeking those first two Nichomachin ways out in you, and that's it, that's not the true friend. However, they are important. So if a person is only hanging out with you because of how you make them feel and/or they're hanging out with you because of what they're getting from you, that is not true friendship. But they are valid qualities. Sometimes on your way to the true friend, you pass through these other levels.You're friends with somebody because they can get you something or, and then that gradually develops into something deeper.There are transition friends. There are friends who meet you when you first come to a place.They're not necessarily going to be your forever friends, but they welcome you in, and that's their job. and then they let you go in some manner, you go in different directions,We're talking about the level one, level two friends. And don't discredit that. Don't say that that's not necessarily a friendship. Because sometimes it is, sometimes it isn't. But sometimes it is.#EstablishedHierarchy, #TheArtOfKnowingYourWeakness, #TheArtOfVulnerability, #TheArtOfMakingFriends, #TransitionFriends Pick up a free copy of Fawn's workbook on making friends: https://www.ourfriendlyworldpodcast.com/ CALL TO ACTION: PLEASE SHARE OUR PODCAST WITH OTHERS

I want to talk about the loneliness epidemic. People are talking about it like it's something that the pandemic brought about, but it's not. It has been here for a long time. The loneliness epidemic was here long before the 2019 pandemic, but people were more likely to speak about it, speak about the fact that they were at home alone, or they felt loneliness, that they felt like, wow, I don't have anyone near me. I don't have someone to turn to. I want to say, don't blame the pandemic. This is something that's been here long before. It's been happening decade after decade. It came to a point where I think , and I've said this before, I think that people felt ashamed, that it was their fault that they didn't have any friends, which meant that there was something wrong with them.But what we noticed was throughout the decades, it was getting worse and worse, and that you are not at fault. People are not at fault. It's the way society has been moving towards is that, "let me do it on my own, you should do everything on your own. You should be self-sufficient. You should do everything by yourself. You should live by yourself."

Today's topic is having anxiety about the future. Let's fix our mental and physical posture. Are we looking at the future that's not good but we're forced to pursue? This brings us to the one word for the podcast episode today, which is Auger. What does it mean and how can it help shape our fate? Are we truly hopeful about the future? Are we OK with the direction that life is taking? It's about where are we going or not going. Is something happening too fast? Is something changing in your life that doesn't feel right? How many of us are feeling these things, and what can we do about it? Sometimes the future doesn't seem so great, especially when we rely on mass behavior, mass consciousness behavior, and the pack mentality. It seems to go towards a fearful area, which never bodes well. So what can we do? Have you noticed that in history, things could be really, really rough, but there are people who can find ways to laugh, find ways to appreciate and find ways to enjoy life? That's where friendship comes in. Even going to a coffee shop or going somewhere that is peaceful and nourishing where people congregate and ask for the nourishment in that. Living and enjoying within the precise moment being completely in the now completely.Thought Exercise: At this moment are you warm enough? At the moment are you not safe? In this precise moment are you not surrounded by love? No matter how dire the situation, if you can bring it to that moment, you're still alive and you're still breathing. There is still hope, there is still peace with you. So, Thinking about that and if you can get yourself a cup of coffee or a cup of tea, that calms and soothes you. Can you relish in that and with the company of someone else? Can you try to think of things that are funny? Let's look at the future in a positive way, because we're going to create it to be that way. We're not going to listen to the doom that's been prognosticated. We're gonna create a better future. We're gonna hang out with some cool people. We're gonna find them if we don't have them, we're gonna seek them out and find them, because trust me, they're out there looking for us. And we're going to laugh in the face of doom and gloom and create a better future together. And that is true art right there, friends! Inside of all of us, there are two wolves. There is the Wolf of Hope and the Wolf of Fear. Which one are you gonna feed? Find people out there. You are always surrounded by people that are your friends. They're also looking for you, and all you have to do is just say hello or look at them longer than you normally would, and when they notice you looking at them, share your heart with a genuine smile. I emphasize the word genuine. Let it come from your heart, from the way you're feeling. So it may not be a happy smile, but if it's a genuine smile, the smile could convey, yes, you're in pain, but you're, you're very happy to be in the presence of this other human being. And that is the spark of friendship right there. REMEMBER: No fate, but what we make. Pick up a free copy of Fawn's workbook on making friends: https://www.ourfriendlyworldpodcast.com/ CALL TO ACTION: PLEASE SHARE OUR PODCAST WITH OTHERS#ZenStories, #aPositiveAttitudeTowardsLife, #NoFateButWhatWeMake, #Auger, #TwoWolves, #TheArtOfFriendship, #OurFriendlyWorldWithFawnAndMattPodcast, #ArtOfFriendship, #PickingUpOnMassConsciousness,

"Friendship is the hardest thing in the world to explain. It's not something you learn in school, but if you haven't learned the meaning of friendship, you haven't learned anything"- Muhammad Ali. " Friendship is a priceless gift that cannot be bought nor sold, but its value is far greater than a mountain made of gold. For gold is cold and lifeless. It can neither see nor hear. In times of trouble, it's powerless cheer. It has no ears to listen, no heart to understand. It cannot bring you comfort or reach out a helping hand. So when you ask God for a gift, be thankful if sends not diamonds, pearls, or riches but the love of real, true friends."- Muhammad Ali on friendship. Be honest and open about how you're feeling, and sometimes you need to express things that you know, that certain things that come outta your mouth sound terrible, but you need to unwrap it and understand why you're having these feelings. It doesn't mean that they're true, but there are so many things to unwrap. There are so many things to understand. It feels complicated,"Me, We" back to our community, back to the world is a small town and everyone is your friend. It sounds like everybody's your friend...weeeeee! No. Some friends are nasty, but they still guide you to where you need to be.Everyone says, oh, that's where friendships are made, is in school. That it's so much harder to make friends when you're older that the kids are so lucky because that's the opportunity and it's really not. It's like you're forced to be in a situation and these are acquaintances. You're not really thinking about true friendship and what is true friendship, and you're not taught relationships. We're not taught in school the most vital thing to learn to do anything in your life. We need to relearn how to relate to one another. How we can understand one another. How can we be heard? How can we be good listeners? How? There are so many “hows,” and we're not taught any of that. It's straight to reading, writing, and arithmetic. And maybe if you're lucky enough, if the school's gifted enough, some art; which is so backward.What do we do when the world/life looks and feels like it's beyond repair? Some examples are global warming, disasters, climate change...you know what I'm saying? It's such a mammoth thing to take on as opposed to realizing that we are infinite beings. We are powerful beyond measure. We are supernatural. By mere imagination, we can create so much beauty and transformation within a second, a split second. Fawn has been on overload the past few days and she breaks down on this episode. And although she can't talk about exactly what the issue is at this point, perhaps you can relate to the emotion. So how can we learn friendship? Well, you listen to our podcast. “The meaning of friendship” definitely needs to be a huge subject taught in school and not just taught one time, but starting from preschool and keep going through college. It needs to be a huge curriculum. What does it mean to be a friend? What does it really mean? You don't have to answer that right now, but let's contemplate that. Let's explore it. Let's ask our other friends, what is the meaning of friendship. Let's come back to it. What do you think? Also, putting ourselves out there to be open to making new friends is like working out. It's a muscle and sometimes you don't wanna do it. And sometimes it hurts after a workout. It feels like you're not doing anything, but it's like, ow. I use muscles I normally don't use. So sometimes it can be a little painful, and uncomfortable, but you grow, and you get stronger.Pay attention. Kee

Barry Lane, the ambassador of love and kindness, troubadour for loving-kindness is with us again, this time from Uvalde, Texas. Barry travels all over the place and he not only teaches kindness, but he spreads kindness everywhere. He goes to schools. He works with children, he's given TED Talks.In this episode, we discuss what is stronger love or hate? How do you mend a broken heart? Where to find love when it seems all we see is a "prickly cactus"?Everybody is operating from some sort of trauma. Everyone has pain. Everyone's doing their best going through whatever they're going through. EVERYONE is literally operating at their highest capacity. Now, that may not mean that they're operating to your standards, to your standards, they're just operating from the best way that they can live. And that goes with friendship. Barry is visiting with the children and teachers who were inside the massacre at Uvalde and we take some time to discuss how we can heal, and how we can be there for each other to create a loving world despite what we are experiencing that is far from kind. We find out where love lives. We take a love pledge. This episode will soothe and nourish you. Barry sings to us. Make sure to listen to the very last song at the end of the episode. It will help.#WhatIsStrongerLoveOrHate #Uvalde #LoveIsEternal #HealingABrokenHearthttps://www.ourfriendlyworldpodcast.com/a-kind-world-with-special-guest-barry-lane/ https://www.ourfriendlyworldpodcast.com/a-kind-world-finding-freedom-and-truth-during-a-tumultuous-time-with-barry-lane/ To Reach Barry:https://www.barrylane.com/ https://www.forcefieldforgood.com/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vzimmQaLzo8 Love and Hate and How to Heal a Broken Heart with Barry Lane - TRANSCRIPT [00:00:00] FAWN: Hello everybody. [00:00:01] MATT: Hello. [00:00:01] FAWN: Welcome back. We have a beautiful, beautiful surprise

We continue the subject we talk about frequently, which is emotional currency and the ability to pick how we choose to spend this. How much do we want to invest? Sometimes we can get so wrapped up in an emotion that we forget that we're investing in all this life-sucking stuff. But when we do, and we say "zero," it's FABULOUS because we feel free, because we are free. We're energized. the fact that when we spend emotional currency like this, not only does it leave room for beauty in our lives, but in that moment and that realization of," I passed through it and that's kind of saying it's over. I refuse to invest anymore,"our life force comes back because we've gathered ourselves. The different parts of ourselves that were scattered in different directions outside of ourselves because we leaked our vital life force are now restored. We have pulled ourselves back together. Now we have the capacity that is able to make good friends and to BE a good friend. #GetYourselfTogether #HowToBounceBackFromABreakup #RealizeYourOwnPowerWhen we're upset, we're leaking "currency." When we pull ourselves together, we pull all of humanity together, with compassion and peaceful understanding.Support our podcast by telling others and leaving a review. Pick up a free copy of Fawn's workbook "The Ikigai of Friendship" here: https://www.ourfriendlyworldpodcast.com/ THANK YOU with LOVE! Get it Together, Get a Hold of Yourself ,Capacity Revisited Podcast - TRANSCRIPT [00:00:00] Fawn: Welcome back everybody. Hello? [00:00:02] Matt: Hello. [00:00:03] Fawn: Hello, world. [00:00:04] Matt: Oh dear. [00:00:04] Fawn: Hello everyone. Thank you for tuning in. Matt and I got into a discussion the other day. [00:00:10] Matt: Discussion. [00:00:12] Fawn: love is winning . And so Matt decided that we should argue with ourselves. And a while ago, long time ago, we were talking about currency, all kinds of currency within friendships, within relationships, just all of life.

I have an objection! I mean, they constantly say when people don't have friends when they're lonely, it's going to cause cancer. It's going to cause heart problems. It's like smoking 10 packs a day of cigarettes. It's like all they do is scare people. Thanks. Thanks for grabbing a headline and then dropping us off a cliff and saying, okay, bye-bye. I wish we had the audience the massive audience that all these “experts” have because instead of fear, we are actually creating a friendly world. In today's episode, we're talking about official or superficial friendships. How do you know if you actually have a friend, why do you depend on something else or somebody else to include you in a friend group, like these people that are parents who are like, oh, don't worry, you'll make friends when your kids make friends, like through their friends. That is so backward. It should be the other way around. . It should be your friends or your children looking at you as an example of how you treat a friendship and how you create a friendship or when you get into a conflict, how you resolve that conflict, or how you walk away from a friendship to maintain your life and your integrity. Your friends or people who may be watching you that you aren't even aware of. You are a walking role model in society. You are your own brand ambassador. Everybody is. We also talk about the Greek word PHILOI, a word that roughly translates to "friend". This type of friendship is based on the characteristically Greek value for reciprocity as opposed to a friend that exists as an end to itself. We also explore the word friend in old English. . It's spelled F R E O N D and guess what it means? To love. To favor. Isn't that nice?That leads me to another objection I have. There are more and more articles, which is great; talking about friendship and seem to love rules for friendship and I have an objection to that. Familiar rather than fellowship.Official or Superficial - TRANSCRIPT [00:00:00] Fawn: Hello? [00:00:01] Matt: Hello. [00:00:03] Fawn: How's it going? How's everybody doing out there? Hello, world. [00:00:07] Matt: Hopefully wonderfully, [00:00:08] Fawn: so. Objection I have, I've had an objection for a few years now. Major objection. [00:00:15] Matt: Objection?

Let's talk about rest. R e s t. We're always going, going, going! Doesn't the world to you seem like everything is speeding up faster and faster, and that time is going by incredibly fast, like a rollercoaster fast?Today's episode is on the value of rest and all the different types of rest we need to look at.There are 7 different ways of rest that our bodies need. And when we rest, we are better friends. We have a free gift for you. Go to https://www.ourfriendlyworldpodcast.com/ and pick up a free copy of Fawn's “Ikigai of Friendship” companion book And to gift us, tell others about our podcast and leave a kind review. Seven Ways of Rest - TRANSCRIPT [00:00:00] Fawn: Woo wee guys, how are you? Hello. Welcome back. [00:00:06] Matt: I feel like, uh, deer Cotton headlights. I don't know what you wanna talk about. . [00:00:11] Fawn: I wanna talk about rest. R e s t. We're always going, going, going, doesn't the world to you seem like everything is speeding up faster and faster, and that time is going by. incredibly fast, like a rollercoaster, fast. [00:00:32] Matt: There's a dichotomy for me because if I'm doing a lot of stuff, my individual days go by really fast. But then when I look back what I did a week ago, it seems like a long time ago, it's like a Twilight Zone. So it's a weird thing. [00:00:49] Matt: So yes, it has sped up and yet has slowed down at the same time. [00:00:54] Fawn: I feel like most of us are really working. What's the term? Is it a car term? Working on all cylinders? Is that the term? [00:01:05] Matt: Firing on all cylinders. [00:01:06] Fawn: Firing on all cylinders, constantly nonstop. [00:01:12] Matt: Yes. [00:01:14]

Everything is a gift, but it's not your responsibility to accept every gift that's given to you. Just because someone offers you something, does not mean you have to accept it. The word "gift" has been around for a long, long time, and when you get into German and you break it down, it basically means to give or receive, or natural talent. But if you keep looking further into the etymology and other aspects of the gift, it's also meaning "poison". Let's look at the word poison: deadly potion or substance, also figuratively, spiritually corrupting ideas, evil intentions. Be choosy and pick the loveliest gifts. That's with friendships, that's with everything in your life; what you surround yourself with. When do you know how to let go of the gift (the good gift)? When a gift has already served you, perhaps it's time to share that gift. That gift could be something like, you'll learn how to do something, so then you become someone's mentor. You're gifting them your experience and helping them out. We have a free gift for you. Go to https://www.ourfriendlyworldpodcast.com/ and pick up a free copy of Fawn's “Ikigai of Friendship” companion book And to gift us, tell others about our podcast, and leave a kind review. Thank you! The Gift – TRANSCRIPT [00:00:00] Fawn: Welcome back guys. [00:00:02] Matt: Hello. [00:00:03] Fawn: Hello. Lovies loves. Hello friends. . Hello. Welcome back, . You know, welcome back. I learned from a swami that everything is a gift, but it's not your responsibility to accept every gift that's given to you. And. That came to me at a point where I was feeling, the weight of everything. [00:00:28] Fawn: And there were people that were mean to me that there were situations where I, I was being faced with that I was just handling everything. And last week we talked about the power of saying no, and I was saying that, it's become so rude now that people have gone overboard with a word no you know, like, no, I choose not to. [00:00:51] Fawn: Like that kind of, no, but looking at everything in life as a gift, you are not meant to experience everything. [00:01:03] Matt: What do you mean

Someone you help out that you love, who also loves you may turn on you. We've all heard the term “hurt people hurt.” The people who have hurt in them, who've experienced some sort of abuse (emotional pain or even physical pain) tend to lash out. Not everybody does that, but it's kind of like having a wound and you have to let the puss or whatever is in there come out. We live in a world where we're all interconnected. So how do we handle that kind of outburst or conflict? How do we handle that when that's us or someone we see who's needing to vent or who's needing to clear all that stuff out? How can we get rid of all that stuff from the inside, release it, and how do we deal with it when we have to deal with other people in our community? The world is our community. What one person experiences, we all experience. How do we release this hurt safe way? In today's episode, we use the character Nate from the TV series Ted Lasso to explore who we pay attention to and how to create a loving way to release hurt and pain. https://www.ourfriendlyworldpodcast.com/ Understanding Nate from Ted Lasso TRANSCRIPT [00:00:00] Fawn: Okay. Are we ready? Yeah. No, , come [00:00:03] Matt: on. It's early or it's late or it's [00:00:06] Fawn: something. Hi everybody. Hello. How are you doing? What are you doing out there? Where are you? Hmm. [00:00:14] Matt: We [00:00:14] Fawn: had a power outage yesterday. We still kind of do. Now we have no internet, but I'm, we're [00:00:19] Matt: very thankful for electricity [00:00:20] Fawn: today. We are so thankful Matt and I. [00:00:23] Fawn: Matt and I got caught out there, . [00:00:25] Matt: We were being stupid or [00:00:27] Fawn: silly. Oh my God. We were so stupid, silly. We went out

Friends In Real Life.We've spent so long sequestered where the relationships that we had had were primarily virtual. They were over the phone, they were on video chat, but they weren'ttactile, they weren't "I'm right in front of you." So things like when I'm texting, I can curate. When I'm Facebook posting again, I can curate. I can choose to write out a paragraph and then delete it and then write something else. Right. So there's a filter there. And in real life, there is still that filter but it's trickier because somebody can see when you're thinking you should say one thing, but you say something else. There are micro gestures that will tell you everything if you are open to it. If you're present enough, you can pick up everything from a split-second movement that happens.We were sequestered even before the pandemic; as a society, we really didn't hang out together that much. Everybody has this magical number in their head that if they have one friend or seven friends or 21 friends, that's enough and they don't want anymore. What kind of friend is it? , is it really a friendship, or is it an acquaintance? People are constantly evolving. And so it's like you need to see their authentic selves in order to connect with that.Listen here: https://www.ourfriendlyworldpodcast.com/ Friends IRL (In Real Life) TRANSCRIPT [00:00:00] MATT: . [00:00:00] MATT: Hello. [00:00:06] FAWN: Good morning. Do you have your morning juice? Which is coffee? You feel better? [00:00:14] MATT: I always feel [00:00:14] FAWN: better after coffee or [00:00:16] MATT: before coffee. Juice in the morning. Whenever I'm recording with you darling. Mm-hmm. . . [00:00:22] MATT: Oh Lord. [00:00:23] FAWN: Welcome back everybody. Hi. So, um, Whew. Okay. Before we get into what we're gonna talk about today, help me get over the struggle. [00:00:35] FAWN: I don't know what to do. I feel like I used to be creative and now I feel like I'm not creative. Rig

Revealing authenticity is one of the major things that keep us from having true friendships and good relationships. This week, we explore the reason for when we expose our feelings, it feels like we create even more problems and we're oftentimes left to be misunderstood. And it just creates more of a situation where you have to talk about it and we don't talk about things. So things are left unsaid. Things are left undone, and if you carry on a friendship, a relationship, over a course of years, it really builds disconnection. The wires of our connections get crossed and become incomprehensible. In this conversation, we include white lies (any kind of lie) and reveal why it is dangerous. We also turn to nature for signs. The significant sign that was revealed before our podcast was the BLUE JAY! What's the spiritual meaning of Blue Jays? We find that the blue jay is associated with authentic interpersonal and creative self-expression.What's at stake here? We could be erasing parts of ourselves, over time, chipping away at our authenticity and communication skills, at our confidence, and then everything of importance gets destroyed. But if we can remember that person who judges us (creating a barrier for us to be authentic) even if it's our own self-judgment, our own thoughts, our own mind about ourselves, like “who am I to go and pursue this? I looked terrible today. Oh, I'm too fat. I'm too skinny, I'm too old, I'm too young,” all those judgments; we have to be aware of that and know that that's coming from a place of insecurity. But why do we feel the need to keep going like this? It's because we don't have enough friendships out there. When we have our crew (even if it's just one person) with us that has our back, we are stronger. The world would be so much better if we could express our thoughts and know that someone was backing us up. If we see an injustice happening and it's just us standing up for something, chances are we may not say anything, because we'll be outnumbered and destroyed in some way. But if there's someone else saying it with us, there's great power in numbers. Blue Jay - Authentic Communication TRANSCRIPT [00:00:00] FAWN: Hi everyone. . [00:00:01] MATT: What was that? [00:00:03] FAWN: My throat made a weird sound, . [00:00:05] MATT: Fair enough. [00:00:06] FAWN: It made us sound like the other day I was talking to someone very, very important to me like, [00:00:13] MATT: like me, [00:00:14]

What is Hypergrowth Mode in Friendship? What happens if someone's not growing and you've grown or you are not growing and the other person has grown; if you have an open mind about it, you can still connect and be together. But that's where you can't be so locked into certain belief systems. So if, let's say you've grown so much and you come back. . I'm like, what happened? And you tell me your experience, then if I'm totally open to also acquiring that growth at that precise moment because of your growth, if I'm totally openhearted about it, I think that that's what keeps a true friendship going. Have you noticed it's gotten easier or harder as time goes by to actually keep in touch with these people who are on either side of it? In this episode, we discuss what happens when people you know who are going through hypergrowth, or if you're going through hypergrowth, these people who are not, can lead to a breakup; which may lead us back to another topic from last week (we did talk about), which was social comparison theory, where somebody's leaving your peer group. https://www.ourfriendlyworldpodcast.com/ Hypergrowth Mode TRANSCRIPT [00:00:00] FAWN: Hi everybody. Welcome back. We have no idea what we're gonna talk about. Oh, we don't do we? Aww. What is going on? Hi everybody. Hope you're well. Love you. Thanks for listening. Thanks for tuning in. What's going on Matt? [00:00:15] MATT: What's on your mind? Okay, here we go. So, back in college I noticed a phenomenon, phenomenon, [00:00:23] MATT: Anyways, uh, it was the most fascinating thing. There would be a girl, woman just starting college. She left her boyfriend back at home, wherever home was, and like clockwork, you could watch this happen. And I watched this happen six or seven times, actually over the course of my four years at university. [00:00:45] MATT: You know, they would tell you how in love they were and how they'd been together for however long it was. In some case it was years and then Thanksgiving, they'd have an argument and it would end on a bad note. Christmas, they'd break up like clockwork. Why do you think that is? And it was literally like clockwork. [00:01:09] MATT: It wasn't. [00:01:11] FAWN: Well, I have found that when you start a fight or you start an argument or you get into an argument, I think it's one's way of ending the relationship when you know it's come to its close, [00:01:24]

Matt explores the findings of Leon Festinger who was trying to figure out how people like to arrange themselves into groups, peer groups, social groups, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera. And so he started really trying to get an understanding of what that means. It's hard to measure yourself against other people in your peer group because peer groups are now infinitely huge and you make certain assumptions about who is and isn't in your peer group. People used to watch the Kardashians. How in the world can we relate to these people even though we live vastly different lives? What are the consequences of comparing ourselves to others? George Bush buys socks from Walmart and that look at how he's one of us makes him relatable. It was such an opportunistic, and it depends on which side of the political spectrum you live on, and how you react to that. But that was publicity. It was great publicity. Exactly. But that makes him relatable. And so what we're seeing in this day and age of the influencer, et cetera, et cetera, these people want to be relatable to the maximum number of people possible. And so they can afford and can curate the experience of seeing them, of, quote-unquote being with them in a very relatable way. And so you start to, we can't help it. It's kind of like we're wired to compare ourselves to these people and you can't compare yourselves to them. But we do, but we can't help it. And so this is why sometimes we get excited when we view one of these like pop celebrities as being bad. But that makes us quote-unquote "feel better about ourselves" because we can't help but compare ourselves to others in our peer groups. And also, and this is a really messed up part, is, once we've decided who's in our peer group, we will literally go out of our way to keep them in our peer group to keep them down. The Social Comparison Theory [00:00:00] FAWN: Welcome back everybody. Hello. Hello. How are you? [00:00:04] MATT: Hello everyone. [00:00:05] FAWN: What are you up to? Hello Martin. Hello, Wendy. Hello, everyone. Everybody, everybody. Everybody around the world. Hello, France. Hello around the world. Matt, you've been looking into something. I have [00:00:23] MATT: Right. It's the darnest thing. You go shooting down a rabbit hole, somebody puts three words together and all of a sudden, [00:00:28] FAWN: bam. How did it happen? How did you come across this thing? [00:00:31]

Have you ever had that person, that friend that was the worst? Like, you wish you had never, ever met this person? There may be people out there that are your enemy, that could do things to you that will disrupt and destroy what seems like everything including your sense of hope. Because of their actions and because of the situation that you were interlaced with, they could also be the spark and the motivation needed to get to the next level to get us to where our (the hero's) destiny lives, finding the motivation to go back to our true, powerful self. Today, we discuss a key perspective needed to recover from the betrayal of a very, very bad friend. When the worst friend happens, it may feel like our entire life is shaken, even our physical body can shake like we're going through an ice storm. Have you ever gone through a breakup and it just, feels gross? You feel so exposed and downright shaky on all levels even physically I shake remembering some instances. It feels like all is lost and everything, quote unquote metaphorically speaking is burned down; everything is gone. Everything. We're stripped. Our life surroundings feel stripped. I think when this happens, it allows for a certain sparseness in order for us to find something that was buried, that was actually us; our sparkling us, that somehow got completely lost and buried. And because that “us” started to fade away, perhaps that's why the very, very, very, very bad friends came along.So in a way, these people were actually our friends who decided to step in and act so ugly for us to be, for it to be the catalyst situation for us to get back to finding who we were at our greatest original form. It's like spiritual house cleaning. And when everything is gone, we're going to find our true self that was there all along, and that's why this very, very, very, very bad friend is our great friend. I'm not saying we're gonna hang out with them and go to tea with them and have pajama parties. I'm saying that it was a good thing. It was a good thing. They acted so ugly. They were selfless enough to come in and be such an ugly force, for us to get back on track.Beyond devastation, beyond the level of betrayal, we can and will find our way back to perfect selves. https://www.ourfriendlyworldpodcast.com/ The Best Worst Friend [00:00:00] FAWN: Hi everybody. Welcome back. Hi. Hello. This episode is for when you think that all is lost. That everything is destroyed. [00:00:13] FAWN: Oh [00:00:13] MATT: dear. [00:00:13] FAWN: It's all bad and everything has burned to the ground. [00:00:21] MATT: Wicked.

This week we go over the top 5 types of kindness and the top 5 places kindness can be displayed. It's said that one of the reasons why people stop and aren't kind is because kindness takes time (either they have no time or they perceive that they have no time). We think that kindness does not take time. Kindness has many ways. One way could be in the way you look at someone. Smiling, for example, has an art to it (the art of smiling is a thing that Fawn talks about all the time). We can all absolutely feel and see people smile. We can sense a genuine smile. When we are being completely in the moment, even if we're rushed, allows for some gentleness to occur for ourselves (within our little bubble). That feeling ripples out. That's a form of kindness.Matt shows how kindness is interpreted; how people see expressions of kindness, through a study that was done in the UK by the University of Sussex. As Fawn and Matt discuss how people view kindness and add to it the perception of how time and opportunity as well as preconceived ideas play a role in kindness, Fawn makes the point that we all have our talents, that we all have our ways to provide kindness, and argues that there should not be a blanket way to be kind; that there are many, many infinite possibilities where kindness can show itself. We should never ever underestimate the power of a genuine smile. It's a brave act to be kind, because yes if you are expected kindness to be understood and reciprocated immediately, you may get your feelings hurt. Being kind should be like lending someone money. Don't lend someone money and expect to get it back. If you lend it, just give it with the expectation that you'll never see it again. You're not being kind to get something in response. You're being kind to help somebody. When someone is hurting, they may lash out at you. They're in so much pain and that pain is just ricocheting off everywhere. And you may get hit by it. You have to kind of expect that and not let that injure you and keep going with your kindness and do your good deed.So why bother being kind? Why not just concentrate on me in mine? Humanity is one body. When one person is in pain, we all feel the pain. And if that person is ignored (their pain is ignored, their pain will spread out to the rest of society. So being kind is really being kind to others, is being kind to yourself. In our own house, if someone is in a bad mood and someone is crying and someone's upset, it affects the whole home. It's the same thing outside of the home. It's the same thing in our society. So that is why kindness is important. It's pretty simple. We'd all much rather live in a world where everyone is kind than a world where everyone is not kind. And even if that's a world where we just try and help, everybody wants to live in a world where everybody's trying to help them, and that makes it easier for us to try and help everyone. This results in us having more energy. If you're constantly feeling like everything is, "you're on your own kid" as we hear all the time growing up in the United States, "pull yourself by your bootstraps." "You're on your own kid" at 18, you're out. When we hear all that stuff, it is disheartening. It is impossible and exhausting to do everything ourselves.The hone

We can think of each person and ourselves as a different kind of element (earth, fire, water, air and space), and explore how these elements work together. Some elements love each other; they support and nurture each other while some elements like fire and water are enemies; destroy each other and they need to remain separate. What does all this mean in accordance to our relationships? How can we coexist? What is the right balance to have (because we all have each and all of the elements within us) in order to have a beautiful friendship? Keep in mind that IMBALANCE is necessary also. If you think about walking, You couldn't walk if you were not imbalanced. If you were always balanced, you would not be able to walk because you would be so centered the whole time. The fact that you have to take one step and put all your weight onto another leg. To go to that next step is a free fall if you think about it. And it requires imbalance. You have to have faith that you are going to transition through that imbalance and wind up in a steady spot. These are the things to keep in mind in the art of friendship. Enjoy this episode and tell others about our podcast, subscribe, and leave us a kind review. AND keep friendship alive. Get a free copy of our book by clicking here: https://www.ourfriendlyworldpodcast.com/ It's Elementary - TRANSCRIPT When [00:00:00] FAWN: I went to the hardware store, Yeah, when I went, when I went to the hardware store, when I went to Home Depot, I had a culture, not a culture shock. I don't know what to call it. It wasn't a shock, but a, when you go to different areas and you don't realize how different you are, and then all of a sudden you experience a shift in culture? Mm-hmm. ? Yes. That happened to me at the store , and then it happened after the store also, like I was talking to our neighbor, Kathy, and she started laughing at one word I said, and the conversation continued, but she definitely laughed at me saying, our friend's name Barry. [00:00:44] FAWN: And she's like, What? I'm like Barry. She's like Barry and, And she was laughing about how I said strawberry or blueberry and then she corrected it quickly, like it happened in a span of like two seconds. Wait, how did she correct it? She said Barry, again, I don't know. Cause I'm experiencing culture shock, like aari or something. [00:01:05] FAWN: Berry. Berry. This is [00:01:07] MATT: like when you try and correct me with your fluent french.

We're talking about telling it like it is, not being worried about looking ugly, and not allowing ourselves to get so offended. Everyone goes through moments where they get offended in a friendship. But have you noticed that in our current culture, as soon as someone gets offended, it's the end of the friendship?Relationships have become disposable because it's so easy to just avoid a person or a certain problem forever, and never want to talk about it again. This takes us back to the saying “How you start something is how you end”. We can't end on a bad note and think that we can go into this other thing and start all over, with a clean slate. The same issues will inevitably come up again. So if we get offended by someone and we end that relationship because we never want to talk to this person again, whatever issue was a charge is going to happen again. That same issue in some other form is going to come up again. Further discussion leads us to explore when being polite at all costs is ruining our humanity and our relationships/friendships. We explore the delicate balance of telling it like it is, perhaps appearing harsh, but needing to be truthful in order to be good friends. Sometimes being unafraid to look foolish or ugly can save our lives. TRANSCRIPT Hi [00:00:01] FAWN: everybody. Hello. Welcome. I told you, what did I tell you about the Hello . [00:00:07] MATT: Hello everyone. [00:00:08] FAWN: Thank you. Hello. Love you. Love is winning. [00:00:15] FAWN: oh dear. This week, today we're talking about giving it to you straight, telling it like it is, right? So I'll tell you how it is, honest. I have to get things off my chest. This week was hard, This week was hard. Uh, Allegra had a meltdown. I'm like, Okay, let's change the perspective. The meltdown happened because of math, which, you know, when I started homeschooling, I started to really love math because, My perspective changed and I got emotional about it. [00:00:46] FAWN: Like I really wanted to understand this thing that always gave me trouble in school. And then, because I could start from the very beginning, like preschool age up until now, we're like, you know, the kids are like, like big [00:01:03] MATT: seventh, ninth, 10th, seventh, eighth, ninth, 10th. God, I missed eight. [00:01:08]

How to make friends when life has changed? How do we make friends when our life has completely changed? And that change could be a move, it could be being in a completely different situation, a new job, people we love passing away, or we give birth, become parents, etc, etc. Things open and close. Things happen, and life changes. That's when we start looking around to see if we have friends for real around us; someone to call, to be with us, to hold our hand; someone we can just walk down the street with, someone to be our witness in life. How can we make friends when life has completely changed or changed a little bit?How do we make friends when we're going through a transformation?It's like jumping into a beautiful lake, but you don't want to because it's gonna be a shocking cold temperature or something. Whatever it is, it's going to be uncomfortable for a few seconds. But Once we're in there, the water's fine and we can open our arms, glide, and enjoy life. In this episode, we discuss steps to take to make new friends in a new place. How to move to make friends moving to a new place - TRANSCRIPT [00:00:00] Fawn: Okay. Hello. We are back. Here we are. [00:00:03] Matt: Hello everybody. How are you [00:00:04] Fawn: doing? Good job, Matt. . I was just telling Matt every time we start the show, hello? He just says hello. I'm like, it just sounds like I spliced your voice in saying hello like a puppet. No. Good. So here he is, everybody. Matt. Hello. Oh my God. [00:00:24] Fawn: So. I made a new podcast friend last week. Actually we met weeks ago, but mm-hmm. . I was on his podcast. His name is Adam, [00:00:35] Fawn: and [00:00:35] Fawn: his podcast is podcasting Business school. So check that out. I think, it's good even if you're not a podcaster, to listen to him because he makes great business sense. . And if you look at it, if you look at people who are doing really well in business, they're actually, you can use their advice also for friendship. [00:00:57] Fawn: But anyway, we were talking and yeah, that's how, how I was doing, I'm like, Oh, you know, finally got through, unpacking the last box. You know, it's been nuts. , he's like, I move too, he. Uh, I think a month and a half before we did, or two months before we did. Mm-hmm. And, and I do recall when we met in this huge forum through Podfest. I think he glanced at our podcast. He didn't know about us. But he was like, Oh, friendship. Well if you're gonna do it, I hope you're doing it on. Like how do I actually teach people to make friends? I'm like, I'm like, Is he talking to me? I t

The invisible line, the invisible barriers that we need to be aware of that will set us free. So the invisible barriers we are dealing with that hold us to certain places in situations, the invisible barriers invisible lines that keep us from connecting to each other. They're all over the place and they come in so many different forms. We discuss some invisible acts of power when once we realize and are aware of them, allow us to break free from the chains that bind us and keep us from living a free life and enable us to create beautiful friendships/relationships. The Invisible Line - TRANSCRIPT [00:00:00] Fawn: Hello everybody. Welcome back. Hello. So the invisible line, the invisible barriers that we need to be aware of that will set us free. So the invisible barriers we are dealing with that hold us to certain places in situations, the invisible barriers invisible lines that keep us from connecting to each other. [00:00:24] Fawn: They're all over the place and they come in so many different forms. But first of all, what are some invisible acts of power? We already did a show, remember with Rachel Chevalier from France, and we talked about grid lines, power lines, right? That are deep in the earth that you can't see. But your body definitely feels, and it changes your health, it changes everything. [00:00:51] Fawn: Lay lines. [00:00:52] Fawn: Remember that? [00:00:52] Matt: Yes. Absolutely. Is it red blood cells? They're affected by magnetism. It's one of those weird things. It's one of the reasons why, No, it's something in the blood. It's not the red blood cells, but it's something in the blood. [00:01:03] Matt: We have this in our bodies, determine which way north is, which is a bizarre [00:01:08] Fawn: thing. Like birds have it right? It's a mineral that exists that it, it's some sort of, Metal or something. Some kind of metal that I think birds have more of. [00:01:21] Fawn: More [00:01:21] Matt: iron in the blood. That's what it is. [00:01:23] Fawn: I thought it was something else like, I don't know. Whatever. Doesn't matter. It doesn't matter. Cause I don't wanna get into the science of it. I wanna get

we all need someone that has our back. We all need someone to confide in. Today we explore the meaning of CONFESSION and realize that it is something more than a religious act; that it is a way to release negativity from our hearts. But how do we know which person or people in our lives we can trust to do this with? The Confidante - TRANSCRIPT [00:00:00] Fawn: There is a reason why so many songs can bring us such comfort. Like there's a song that says, Have little faith in me, and that's what we all need is to have someone that has our back. That's one of the parts of the art of Friendship, We have each other's backs, right? That you know you're not alone, That when you're going through something that someone is there with you. Maybe they've gone through it already, or they can see better than you in certain circumstances. Today's show, I wanna talk about the confidant, and that came from confess. I was listening to Carolyn Myss. She brought up the whole point of, you know, everything's changing and so many religions and everything, and once you leave Earth, it's not about the religion. It's not, and that, but so many things have been thrown out. What's the saying, Matt? Like, thrown out with the bath water, [00:01:04] Matt: throw the baby out with the bath water. [00:01:06] Fawn: And one of the things that has been thrown out has been confession. And it made me think, And then we actually talk about, it's, it's so weird because on a parallel level we talk about the same stuff carolyn May talks about, you probably don't even know who she is. Uh, sort of, okay. So. The whole idea of confession. I started looking into it. I'm like, Well, I, from my perspective, I understand, I don't really understand the religious, religious aspect of confession. Like what is it really there for? Do you know, Matt, did you have confession growing up in the religion you were raised in? Oh my [00:01:44] Matt: goodness. Good Protestants. Don't do the confession. That was one of Martin Luther's issues with Catholicism. [00:01:50] Fawn: What's wrong with confession? What I mean, what do you think confession is all about? [00:01:55] Matt: Okay, so confession, not unlike communism is a really, really great idea in kind of abstraction. But when you start involving humans into the mix, everything gets messed up. [00:02:08] Fawn:

A reminder from Goethe: For five minutes a day, look at something beautiful, listen to something beautiful, and think of something beautiful, especially so when you're not feeling so well. This week we focus on what to do when we don't feel well, and what to do when friends don't feel well. TRANSCRIPT - Checking in on A Friend Feeling Under the Weather [00:00:00] Fawn: Welcome back everybody. A reminder from Goethe. Yes, for five minutes a day, look at something beautiful. Listen to something beautiful. Think of something beautiful, especially so when you're not feeling so well . So, hi folks. We caught something. We're two chicken to take a k. So we're just quarantining. We're just hunkering down the whole family. We don't know what we have, but it seems like all the other things we've had before. Honestly, like the kids get sick, It starts with, a sore throat and then their eyes get glassy and then it's, uh oh, [00:00:42] Matt: and then it's really low energy. [00:00:44] Fawn: Mm. It's just quiet. They get quiet. Exactly. Low energy, and then you're like, Oh, I'm tired. I'm gonna go. And then it's me staying up all night, cleaning up after everything that gets expelled from these kids all night long. Thank you very much. Matt . Why are you looking away? Like there's somebody else I'm talking to in this room. Oh my God. Matt, why do you do that? ? [00:01:11] Matt: Because I don't wanna accept. Yeah. Anyways. [00:01:15] Fawn: All right. I love you. [00:01:16] Matt: I know God, but my goodness, I, I try, [00:01:19] Fawn: geez. I mean, remember the day we used to fight over who gets to change a diaper? Well, changing diapers [00:01:25] Matt: is cool. That's easy [00:01:28] Fawn: ish. All right, so anyway, we're not feeling so well, so this is gonna be a little short episode.

This is not a sad or any kind of sad love story. No, this is a happy thing. This is another baby step (what we can all do to improve our friendships and our zhuzhiness out in the world, and how we can get to the point where we're creating beautiful bonds). The notebook is one way. It is a beautiful tool to pay attention to the people we meet to get a good understanding of who they are, what they value, and you know, what cool stuff they like. So it's kind of like doing a portrait of someone; a drawing. So you're really paying attention. And later when you look back on it, it's like a portrait of each person. And let's say it's been 20, 30 years, or a long, you know, so many years or you've moved away, wouldn't it be cool to just look back on it and reflect on the different kinds of personalities you met or you remember what you learned from this person back then?It gives you a sense of comfort. In a way, it's kind of like a security blanket to have a little notebook. The notebook is an easy key we can all use to help us as we venture off and explore growing our friendship circle. Fawn and Matt give examples of how precisely the notebook is accomplished. Reach out to us: https://www.ourfriendlyworldpodcast.com/ The Notebook – TRANSCRIPT [00:00:00] Fawn: The notebook. This is not going to be a sad or any kind of sad love story. No, this is a happy thing. We're gonna tell you about the notebook. It'll be like when we did the baby steps; we did a few episodes of baby steps of what we can all do to improve our friendships and our zhuzhiness out in the world, and how we can get to the point where we're creating beautiful bonds. The notebook is one way. So here it is, guys. Hello. Welcome back. I'm Fawn. [00:00:35] Matt: Hello? I'm still [00:00:37] Fawn: here. This is Matt. One of the other things that I've been turning to lately, because we are in a completely new environment and we've been meeting so many people, really making an effort to not be lazy. Now we're out there and we're making sure that we're not lazy with our SEL skills. Social emotional learning, as well as, the skills you muster up or the courage you muster up when you're meeting people and when you see someone and you wanna become friends friends, or at least spark something , something wonderful, a wonderful conversation, a little, meet cute moment, a feel good moment, whatever it is, right? The notebook comes in handy. Matt actually has been doing this with beer and other things and other things. . Matt has a beer notebook. So when we moved to Boulder, There were so many beers knobs there, and that's when we got into a crowd of friends. That was their business. Is that they, what? What did they do? Soma, or how do you say it? Soma, Somal. How do you say

Case of the missing couch, FedEx, and the opportunity to meet friends; the opportunity to make friends in almost every situation, even situations where it seems like, things are awry. Proof that friendship exists everywhere. Transcript [00:00:00] Fawn: Welcome back everybody. [00:00:01] Matt: Hello, [00:00:02] Fawn: this is Fawn and Matt. Case of the missing couch and FedEx and the opportunity to meet friends, the opportunity to make friends in almost every situation, even situations where it seems like, things are awry. You all know we moved and we have had so many deliveries. We had no furniture, we bought furniture and a lot of it was being delivered through FedEx and one very heavy package was lost out in the world. No idea where; nobody knew where it was. Lots of calls to the company we bought it from , lots of calls to FedEx. Nobody knew. Ultimately it was this FedEx delivery that landed us to this new friendship, friendship that we're telling you about. So what happened was the couch was missing. It was declared, lost. FedEx said, oh, it was delivered to the wrong address . But we don't know where it is now. I'm like, well, what, what address was it delivered to? [00:01:11] Matt: Right. Nice and simple. [00:01:12] Fawn: They wouldn't tell me anyway, one morning I go to bed at 4:30 in the morning because I was unpacking and doing whatever work that needs to be done in this house. And I went to bed at 4:30 and around seven o'clock, seven 30. Was it seven o'clock Matt? [00:01:31] Matt: It was around 7. [00:01:33] Fawn: There's a knock at the door. [00:01:34] Matt: Boom, boom, boom. [00:01:34] Fawn: The kids are running upstairs. They're like, there's someone at the door. This man in yellow is at the door. He wants something. And I was thinking, oh my God, another salesperson, like, because

This is our very first episode in a public place with in-person live conversations at the local coffee shop!!!!!!!!!!!! Wanting to lead by example, Fawn and Matt share their meet-cute moment on their friendships with Marianne, Danielle, and Hillary. This conversation is all about how to notice the magic, being brave enough to see people, say "Hello" and go further by sparking conversation, creating friendship, and continuing friendship when you come to points of disagreement, learning from those disagreements, and developing the art of a strong friendship. Fawn, Matt, Marianne, Danielle, and Hillary share how they all met and prove how the world is a small town and you are surrounded by friendship. To reach out to us, please go to: https://www.ourfriendlyworldpodcast.com/ TRANSCRIPT: The Earth Is A Small Town [00:00:00] Fawn: The earth is a small town and everybody's your friend. And I dare say, even now with everything that's going around in the world, Uhhuh what's, what's going on in the world. It is still as true as ever that the earth is a small town. And everybody's your friend. Seriously. [00:00:20] Matt: Yeah, but what's this racket and I keep hearing around us. [00:00:23] Fawn: Okay. Hi everybody. We are back. This is our first time out in the wild unmasked, even and we are out, we are at a coffee shop in the most, one of the most beautiful places on the planet. We moved Matt and I moved here we are. And this is what happens. The show is more about the art of the start and throughout the last two and a half years, talking to you all, I kind of deep down felt like a hypocrite, talking about friendship and going out there and creating bonds and meeting friends and developing and nurturing friendships when we were sitting all by our lone sums in our kitchen, talking about it. Hey, so here we are. And we're gonna tell you how we did. So here's what happened. It was the power of a coupon. Matt had a coupon for a coffee shop. I had [00:01:21] Matt: a, how many years I had a gift card, two [00:01:23] Fawn: years, two years. You had a coupon for coffee two years. It was in his wallet. [00:01:30] Matt: So just as the pandemic broke, and one of the things that convinced us that this pandemic might not be a joke was I was gonna go meet with Amazon in Colorado. And I was gonna go to their offices and they were gonna do their spiel and giv

Why it's so important to end things on a proper note so that you can have a great new beginning; from friendships to jobs, to moving to a new place. How You End is How You Begin [00:00:00] Fawn: Hello? [00:00:01] Matt: Hello? [00:00:02] Fawn: Hi. Oh, so bears trucks, neighbors, wire transfers, bears documents. It has been [00:00:12] Matt: nuts. What a long, strange trip it's been [00:00:15] Fawn: This talk today is inspired by one of our friends. Who reminded us a couple years ago, really like to really think about it. Something we've always thought about. Like, I, I never, for this very reason, I'm just about to explain. I never, did the normal thing for like new year's Eve and stuff like that because how you end is how you begin. So I never, I. Well, sometimes I did but like sometimes I did, but like I never cursed the year before and said nuts to you, 2020 yay. For 2020, you know, 20, 21 or whatever the [00:00:56] Matt: right. You know? Yeah. Yeah. Why do you blasting the old while praising this completely unknown new? [00:01:02] Fawn: So Heather who was on our show a while, while back. Heather the advisor, she brought up this phrase of how you end is how you begin. So how you begin is connected directly linked to how you ended something. So folks, we finally did it.. We moved, we moved, we moved far away to another part of the planet. And we made sure ceremonial in all ways that we definitely ended things on a note that was. Clear. How would you say it? Mind you we're both still exhausted. We're still deep in the thick of a move and I think last night was the first time we slept in, in a real bed, in a real bed in over a month and a half. [00:01:56] Matt: No. [00:01:57] Fawn: Yes, [00:01:57]

A toast: "Here's to those who wish us well, and those who don't can go to hell." Don't let those turkeys get you down. I love turkeys. You know, when we talk about people we don't like and we compare them to pigs or cows or turkeys, it makes me sad because I love all these animals.What's a good word to describe people who just get you down, the ones who take you away from your good path? I'm not talking about your good friends. This episode is dedicated to our loving people that go around, go about their lives, walk their walk, and are in some ways, accosted by people who totally try to throw you off. Sometimes it comes in the form of random chatter and if you hear enough of this chatter, it can really mess you up. This is a fix for all that stuff. Party Poopers Good [00:00:01] Fawn: morning. [00:00:02] Matt: Hello. [00:00:02] Fawn: Good afternoon. Good evening. Hello to the world. Hello, our beautiful friends. Don't let the turkeys get you down. Don't let those turkeys get you down. I love turkeys. You know, when you talk about people and you compare them to pigs or cows or turkeys, it makes me sad because I love all these animals. What's a good word to describe people who just get you down. Who take you away from your good path? I'm not talking about your good friends. I'm and I'm talking to all of our goodhearted people, right? I'm talking about our loving people that go around, go about their lives, walking their walk, and you're in some ways, accosted by people who totally try to, throw you off. I don't know if it's intentional. Sometimes it is. Sometimes it's not, sometimes it's just the way they are. And if you hear enough of this chatter, it can really mess you up. [00:01:04] Matt: Call 'em party poopers. [00:01:06] Fawn: Oh yeah. Party [00:01:07] Matt: poopers. Every party has a pooper. That's why we invited you party pooper. Oh my God. Okay. Oh, oh, wait. That was a song. Oh. Oh, hope we don't get in trouble for that. Oh, [00:01:15] Fawn: So for example, I'm a yoga teacher, but

Goethe said "he who cannot draw on 3000 years is living hand to mouth." We explore our history and think about this quote by Goethe as we wrap our ethics series. We explore so much, including Goethe, the four ideals, prosperity, the satisfaction of desires, moral duty, spiritual perfection, Lao Tzu, "Tao te Ching," living simply and honestly, the idea of reciprocity and much more. TRANSCRIPT [00:00:00] Fawn: Yuhoo hello? Hello? Are [00:00:04] Matt: we ready? Oh my goodness. Yes. So here we are. We're back to talk about ethics. Oh my God. Again, um, we're gonna try to wrap it up though, which, which of course, you know, seeing is how we're literally at, uh, one CE or one common era. Ad for you folks who didn't grow up with it. There is an awful lot going on. In point of fact, Goethe said "he who cannot draw on 3000 years is living hand to mouth." [00:00:32] Fawn: Okay. Goethe man or woman, [00:00:35] Matt: man. German man German. He is the man in German, literature. [00:00:42] Fawn: I always get a little scared with anything Germans. [00:00:46] Matt: He does. What's his background. We certainly need to touch a little bit on NCHE today. So that's gonna be really scary. [00:00:51] Fawn: Oh my God. Can we make it a quick one today? We're gonna do what we can do. It's like when you're moving, you're like, okay, we have everything in boxes. And then when it really comes down to it, you're like, oh, wait a minute. There's this piece over here, this piece over there. And you end up just cramming everything into one final box. Right? And I think that's what we're doing today. [00:01:11] Matt: oh my goodness. [00:01:12] Fawn: I mean, ethics is a very complicated thing or si

ethics and the origins of it, understand ethics, bringing it back to how it is affecting our friendships, how it is affecting our society, and basically ultimately our lives. Ethics is philosophical and it deals, it concerns itself with conduct in questions of good and evil in right and wrong. The definition- Ethical; derived from the Greek word ethos, which means character, and from the word, Mores, which means customs. Together they combine to define how individuals choose to interact with one another. So let's make things better, create a better world, and try to understand the shenanigans that took place that created the whole basis for ethics. We also explore Greek and Roman influence on us to this day. What do we do with this information? Understanding how we got where we are now and where we are now is the key. There are a lot of weirdness, differences, and change we need to look at. Ethics 3 TRANSCRIPT [00:00:00] Fawn: Hello, everybody. Welcome back. [00:00:01] Matt: Hello [00:00:02] Fawn: okay. Guess what? We're gonna continue on talking about ethics. [00:00:06] Matt: Oh dear [00:00:06] Fawn: ethics and the origins of it. We're gonna break it down little by little baby steps. Oh my goodness. there is a lot of noise outside. Sorry. It's a hot hot day. We have to have the windows open. You're gonna hear screeching, screeching cars and birds and screeching birds. [00:00:27] Matt: Exactly. [00:00:28] Fawn: And as soon as I said that the birds got quiet. Okay. So ethics where it came from. Well, the origins of it, we were starting to little baby steps, little bites, understand ethics, bringing it

Ethics is that weird branch of philosophy that concerns itself with conduct and questions of good and evil and right and wrong. And those four words good and evil, and right and wrong sound like they should be like, oh yes, good is right. And evil is wrong, but there are always shades of gray in between. You can do an evil act in the cause of right. You can do a good act in the cause of wrong. Welcome to the weird world of ethics and how it touches our friendships. This episode explores how we can help each other, and how remembering the art of friendship can help you in the midst of the turmoil of ethics, evil, and kindness. How can you prevail with kindness and not have anything else come into your circle? And just have it be a kind happy world. Ethics 2 TRANSCRIPT [00:00:00] Fawn: Welcome back everybody. [00:00:01] Matt: Hello [00:00:02] Fawn: hi, good morning. And good evening. Good afternoon. Good all. Good all. All is well. All is well. [00:00:12] Matt: So we gonna put our, [00:00:13] Fawn: no matter what, [00:00:14] Matt: we're gonna put our college caps on today and talk about ethics. [00:00:16] Fawn: Yeah, we started a, we started a thing actually. We're letting you in on really the conversations we have in our kitchen, or when we go out for coffee. Inevitably. It always turns into the ethical dilemma. [00:00:33] Matt: I love, I love the game ethical dilemma, because very scary. You can split the hair and all of a sudden somebody's gonna do something god awful. [00:00:41] Fawn: And it makes me when we play ethical dilemma, it makes me wanna flip the table over. I don't like it. I feel very depressed,

In philosophy, ethical dilemmas, also called ethical paradoxes or moral dilemmas, are situations in which an agent stands under two conflicting moral requirements, none of which overrides the other. A closely related definition characterizes ethical dilemmas as situations in which every available choice is wrong. We explore ethics and friendship and how ethics have shaped our society. Connect with Fawn and Matt:Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/befriendlyworld/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/FriendlyWorldPodcastTwitter: https://twitter.com/FriendleeBeLinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/fawn-anderson-5139431a6/Website: https://www.ourfriendlyworldpodcast.com/Loved this episode? Leave us a review and rating here: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/id1529286185?mt=2&ls=1

Fawn and Matt get into the etymology of the word MARTYR and figure out what it means within our various relationships within our culture and society. Martyr the original sense of it, which means feeling torn between two conflicting impulses. We explore that sense of conflict within our relationships: work friend vs your own private life friend.Can you truly be friends with someone that you work with within a total corporate environment? For example, another example of that without being corporate would be, that most cops are not friends with normal citizens. And then now that we have the world in so much upheaval, we have politics coming into it. Can we be friends with someone who is so politically agitated or so politically distraught or not even distraught, but just so political, as opposed to back in the day, we used just to be friends with everyone.There is the religious friend as opposed to the friend who is not of a particular religion. because there's that division and it very much centers around core beliefs. Another conflicting impulse would be people of the opposite sex. Can men and women truly be friends? And what if you're not of a particular identity? What if you're in a relationship as opposed to being single? Can people who are single truly be friends with someone who is in a committed relationship or a marriage? Can people who have children truly be friends completely with people who don't have children? When we became parents, this was such When you're dealing with such polarized sensitivities in our culture, right now, it is an issue. It is an issue because people have different sensibilities for different situations and you can't always gel, especially when the world seems like everything is a trigger. At the root of feeling and being a martyr is the feeling of being torn between two conflicting impulses. What's the whole idea of a martyr and how are we being martyrs these days within our relationships, within our society? How can we transform out of this state? Transcript - Martyr [00:00:00] Fawn: Welcome back. Are you guys there? Hello? Hello. Happy every day, no matter what's going on in the world, guys, [00:00:08] Matt: are we recording [00:00:09] Fawn: faith? We are recording now. Hi everybody. Welcome. [00:00:12] Matt: Hello. [00:00:13] Fawn: Welcome. Welcome. Welcome back. Good every day, no matter what, let's keep the faith. Um, [00:00:21] Matt: interesting choice

Music connects and touches us in ways we never thought possible. In this episode, you will learn: 1. How sound affects us physically and emotionally2. The different ways music can be used as therapy3. How our bodies react to different types of music When a music therapist specializing in LGBTQAI+ issues is asked about their work, they reveal the many ways music can be used to transform us, from the personal to the physical. "Music is simply a vibration. All sound is vibrations created by whatever and they vibrate at different rates and depending on how high or low the note is."Gray Baldwin is a music therapist with over 25 years of clinical experience working with children, teens, adults, and older adults in behavioral health, medical, and hospital settings, as well as in schools and community music therapy settings. They specialize in queer issues, identity development, acute and chronic pain, trauma, and stress, and teach courses on research, music therapy, medical settings, practicum, supervision, mindfulness, ethics, and culturally responsive practices at several universities and colleges. Resources: Resources: www.mainstreetmusictherapy.com gray.baldwin.mt@gmail.com https://www.thetrevorproject.org https://pflag.org https://gsanetwork.org https://www.glsen.org https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org To find a therapist https://www.inclusivetherapists.com Tedtalk about intersex https://www.ted.

We are joined by Gray Baldwin, MA, MT-BC as we discuss the importance of identity in our society. Gray explains the definitions of LGBTQAI2+ and we have a heart-to-heart talk about healing. If you are going through stuff, this episode is for you to know you are loved and that you are not alone. We are cosmic beings, we are infinite, complex, and simple at the same time, we have infinite possibilities within us, we are the universe kind of beings. We are of the light. We are divine. There's no way you can pinpoint a living being into one thing. We are complex and ever-evolving. And at the same time, I wonder just how important is identity? For me, I feel it's very important to identify my culture, who I am, my skin color, everything, and embrace that and embrace the beauty of that. I have to do that because I feel so discriminated against, that I have to fully embody what I identify with. In another world, in another kind of situation, I would say, why should I? I'm a human being. But at the same, the way I feel is “No, I'm a human being who is of this culture who is of this background.”And it's really important to stick up for where I come from and for who I am and to fully embody that. Resources: www.mainstreetmusictherapy.com gray.baldwin.mt@gmail.com https://www.thetrevorproject.org https://pflag.org https://gsanetwork.org https://www.glsen.org https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org To find a therapist

Understanding what kindness actually is, as opposed to respect, means learning how we can use both of these things. And when we can use both of these things in our relationships. The word respect comes from the middle English from Latin respectus which means to look at, to regard. from R E, which means back. And then to that, you add S P E C E R E, which means to look at, so to look back on. The definition of respect is a relation or reference to a particular thing or a situation and an act of giving particular attention, consideration, like high or special regard, esteem, the quality or state of being esteemed; a positive feeling or action shown towards someone or something considered important or held in high esteem or regard. It conveys a sense of admiration for good or valuable qualities. Is respect earned or given? Respect is earned, not given suggests that if you want to be respected, you cannot force people to respect you just because you want them to. We aren't obliged to love or respect anyone just because they exist. It's like, You have to go through a series of things to, in a way earn that respect. Whereas kindness is not about earning it. Sometimes you have to be kind to the most hideous person, the most hideous acting person because that's what they need, because we all know that hurt people hurt. People that are in pain want to inflict pain on others. That's all they know. And maybe that's their way of being understood and being heard; when you feel my pain is when you're gonna feel what I'm going through. You will understand me better. It's really messed up, but I think that is unfortunately the way of things in our society. Let's really look at where it actually stems from this whole disrespect thing really starts the way we are raised as babies, the way that as soon as we're born, we have to be put into daycare the way that we just have to fend for ourselves the way we're told you're out by 18, 18, you're out, you better make your own money. You better be out of here. It's saying that you don't belong to the family, that you have to get the heck out. And I understand having a sense of responsibility and becoming independent, but that's a different issue from saying you need to get out. It's disrespectful. And we do it with the elders too. We, we put them in daycare. They're no longer part of the family. They're no longer under the same roof for different reasons. One is, you know, because the, the respect from generation to generation is not really considered, and there's no kindness in there, but there's really no respect. And so, yeah, even when we're not dealing with elders, we barely want to hang out during Thanksgiving. We can barely hang out at a kitchen table these days, because we are so split even more than ever before with our politics, with our right as human beings, as my right, as a woman, totally trampled on by your father. It's just, there's no listening. There's no understanding. There is no compassion or empathy for something that you may not be experiencing in your own life. And so what I was trying to tell my friend was what gets me mad is these people who have no respect and have no, they have no empathy until they experience the pain for themselves. That's the only time that they may consider another point of view is when theirs their life is. So put on the extreme for them to fully be immersed in what they thought they were against for them to understand it. Whereas you have to realize you don't have to live a certain way to understand someone. It takes empathy. It take

We all have a compass needle within us knowing the true north.The direction that points directly toward the geographic north pole. This is a fixed point on the Earth's globe. That is the definition of true north. Like a compass points toward a magnetic field, your personal true north directs your path and pulls you forward to your personal place of perfection. True north is an awareness of direction. It's a guidance, your orienting point, your fixed point in a spinning world that helps you stay on track. It's your internal compass unique to you and only you, representing who you are at your deepest level. True north is a sense of being at home within yourself. What feels good to you at your core is your true north. Are we guided by logic? Are we guided by reason? Are we guided by math; by some rationale that makes perfect sense on paper or are we guided by intuition and feeling? What if the logic and math don't make sense? What if intuition and spiritual guidance that you are asking for is silent? Like, you know, you could be spiritual, you could be religious, you could be whatever. Everyone asks, where am I supposed to go? What is happening? Do I turn right? Or do I turn left? Do I make this decision? Or this decision? What should I do? When you ask, you get that inner knowing of what to do, but what happens when you don't hear anything? It's like a deafening silence. It's a horrible feeling when you can't feel that guidance, when you don't hear or reply to your request. It leaves you with a feeling of being deeply alone. You can be surrounded by people. You can be in the midst of crowds, you know, and feel like you have friends and still feel this way. As we travel in various directions, we use discernment and knowing at our core to actualize our path in life, by tuning to this true north, we feel our power. We feel centered. And we are attuned to our surroundings and to our global cosmic family, which brings us to the art of friendship and true north. Physically being where you're supposed to be is just as important as being somewhere spiritually, being somewhere emotionally as you're true north. So finding the true north and the quest for deeper connection; connection with people, connection with where you're stepping, where you're walking on the earth, connection with the planet, connection with the universe; where are you in it?? How can we reconnect with that? How can we get to that place? For me also, going back to the art of friendship, true north is truly the connection to our global family. It's even more important right now to find your inner true north and connect with your true, true Norths, which are your, your family members that bring you comfort and bring you strength. And so this is the quest today; to find that deeper connection. As we navigate our lives, we experience unknowns. Change is not easy. It's a muscle you have to use and you have to work out. That's why, when, like we have so many people in our lives that are so old and rigid, you know, like Bruce Lee always said, was it Bruce Lee? Who said, be like bamboo, don't be like an Oak tree because bamboo will sway with the wind. But the Oak will break. We can go back to the teachings of Aikido, to be like water. You have to move and conform and change and yourself; mold yourself as you go through, you have to bend, you have to go with the flow and when you don't and this is with ideas, this is with just working out your body. This is with emotions. It's all of that. You have to constantly be with the flow. That's why surfers are so cool because every wave that comes is different and they can ride it instead of being swallowed up by it. And when they do get swallowed up by it, they come back and they ride the next. It's good bec

The whole sense of comfort and having a friend who is your witness in life is that there is a treasure in when you and a friend are not on equal footing when they are not in the thick of things that you're in the midst of. There's a balance. This is a balancing gift. This is one of the many ways the action of comfort can really be felt. Sometimes when friends are not equal, one tends to assume, especially in the beginning when one friend may assume that you're weak or you don't know how to do something because you may not be in that exact state of mind to be showing your expertise. So then they take the role of “I know better” and they assume the role of mentor. And so these roles get established. As time goes on, you develop ways in which you can unfold in front of one another, and you can see your gifts and you can see as time goes on, that one person is strong one moment, the other person is weak and then it flips. It's the turning of the world. It's the rising and setting of the sun. It's the same way with our lives and our experiences and our friendships. Our relationships are like that. Oftentimes you get put in a situation where you're emotionally connected and you're not thinking through things clearly and logically and the other person, your friend can see more clearly, and while they're emotionally connected to you personally, they're not emotionally connected to your problem at the moment. So they can see things more objectively and you're more apt to listen to them because you do have the emotional connection to them so they can help dig you out of your hole. It's one of the few cases where logic can't get you out of a place that emotion has gotten you into. Sometimes it's enough to hit the pause button on your life for 15 minutes. And then jump back into it with a renewed sense and an understanding that the earth is still spinning around the sun. It's still spinning around the universe and everything. It's good to actually get back to that sense of perspective because sometimes it is just that the dishwasher broke where that seems like such an enormous ginormous unsolvable problem, but really, it's good to have somebody remind you that everything has a solution. This is where comfort comes in; how our friendships are a source of comfort.So let's get into the definition of comfort: from the 13th century, the meaning is to cheer up, console, soothe, to soothe when in grief or trouble; to help, to strengthen. The noun, which originated if you look at the etymology of it, circa 1200 is the feeling of relief in affliction or sorrow, solace, pleasure, and enjoyment. To solace is to help; to strengthen. And isn't that what we do for each other? From old English word in the same sense was frofor, meaning the state of enjoyment resulting from the satisfaction of bodily wants and freedom from anxiety. And then there's the middle English meaning, which means strength, support encouragement. Dictionary.com defines comfort as a verb to soothe, console, reassure, and bring cheer to. And then the noun is the relief in affliction consolation solace. So what is comfort? Psychologist, Kolcaba, talked about three elements of comfort that revolves around relief, ease, and transcendence. Tune in to this episode on how we can find comfort on our own and within our relationships. https://www.ourfriendlyworldpodcast.com/ https://w

There are three types of friends. There are those people who are friends with you because they get stuff from you. There are those people who are friends with you because of the way you make them feel. And there are the people who just love you. Okay. Those would be the three types of friends and obviously, we would love and if every single one of our friends was quote-unquote type three, who loves us, just cuz.So how do we figure this out?https://www.ourfriendlyworldpodcast.com/ https://www.facebook.com/FriendlyWorldPodcast https://www.instagram.com/befriendlyworld/ https://twitter.com/FriendleeBe https://www.linkedin.com/in/fawn-anderson-5139431a6/ How to Tell What Kind of Friend You Have - TRANSCRIPT [00:00:00] Fawn: Enjoying your coffee? [00:00:06] Matt: Maybe a little. [00:00:07] Fawn: Hi, good morning. Good morning over here, where we are right now. Good evening. Good afternoon. And hello everyone. How are you? What are you doing? What are you doing? What are you doing? Ah, welcome back everybody. So, how do you know, how do you know, what kind of friend you have, Matt?? [00:00:26] Matt: How do you know? Well, first, [00:00:28] Fawn: well, first of all, Matt always has a way to spot things out immediately. And then when you ask and then he'll like tell you the most messed up stuff about someone that you think, well, I think is okay, cause I have this Disney or Pollyanna version of the world. And then he'll whisper to me later. How this person is [00:00:51] Matt: no good. Uh, sometimes, sometimes not, [00:00:54] Fawn: well, some, well, I'm just saying like the times I've been totally shocked by your assessment within a few seconds. And the weird thing is you're right. How do you do it? And then when I ask you for advice, you never have anything for me,

Did you know that our cells, (the cells in our bodies) create light? Science today is telling us that even our cells emit light when they perform their functions. Neurons in the brain and spinal nerves have been found to produce photons. Photons are tiny particles of light that influence our very atomic structure when they send impulses to each other. They're communicating through light! "The Energy Codes" by Dr. Sue Morter. A little quote that actually blends into what we're talking about today, about authenticity. A quote from the book: "The key to a fully empowered experience of life is embodying the energy that you are." When I read that to me, I get, to live fully, you have to be fully yourself. Don't hide. Don't try to edit yourself because you're afraid, afraid of not having this friend, or afraid of not having the job. Also, what is the difference between authentic and genuine? We discuss 4 keys to noticing the authenticity in yourself and others. https://www.ourfriendlyworldpodcast.com/ https://www.facebook.com/FriendlyWorldPodcast https://www.instagram.com/befriendlyworld/ https://twitter.com/FriendleeBe https://www.linkedin.com/in/fawn-anderson-5139431a6/ TRANSCRIPT The Art of Authenticity [00:00:00] Fawn: Welcome back. [00:00:01] Matt: Hello? [00:00:01] Fawn: Hello. How can I thank you for listening and come across in the way that I really feel in my heart. How do I do that? Would that not sounding authentic? How do I do that? [00:00:13] Matt: Uh, yes, authenticity is in a challenging place for me right now. I happen to be, uh, uh, interviewing with different companies. So that's always a tricky thing. Tricky spot [00:00:25] Fawn: I'm in a tricky spot with it myself, because I was being my normal self. I'm an open book and with a friend, if something bothers me, I talk about it in a gentle way. And I felt like the person wasn't hearing me. So I went to the next person in our little tiny circle.

The Japanese aesthetic principle embraces the imperfect and impermanent nature of all things; recognizing beauty in the flawed, the incomplete, and the broken.Beauty can be found beneath the imperfect surface. (I repeat) Beauty can be found beneath the imperfect surface. Wabi-Sabi W A B I - S A B I Wabi-Sabi is the Japanese aesthetic principle that embraces the imperfect and impermanent nature of all things. Recognizing beauty in the flawed, the incomplete, and the broken; the beauty of imperfection, the beauty of quote-unquote imperfection, the understanding and appreciation, and respectfor, or of the transience, the imperfection, as we see it and recognizing the beauty of it all. That's Wabi-Sabi.Wabi-sabi stems from the Buddhist understanding of three life principles. One is impermanence. Two is, suffering. Three is emptiness or absence,but the meaning over time has transformed into finding joy in solitude, appreciating nature, lauding, old-age wisdom, accepting that things come and go, and loving them honestly, and deeply while they last. Wabi-Sabi recognizes that nothing lasts forever. And so it is rare and beautiful. Some of the traits include modesty, subtle grace, acceptance,earthiness and peacefulness. We can find wabi-sabi and everything. We can find it in aesthetics like when things are not symmetrical when there's asymmetry happening, that's wabi-sabi. You can find wabi-sabi in poetry. Every word is chosen after careful consideration and carries multiple meanings and intentions. You can find wabi-sabi in pop culturewhen you are seeking the not so perfect. As we, take in wabi-sabi and friendship, let's first look at how to ground ourselves and appreciate our lives as they are; as is; the big dreams, the big plans for the future, and every worry. Appreciate where you are right now. How can we do that? How can you appreciate where you are. That's part of wabi-sabi. Stop worrying about being so perfect.It can block you. It can block you if you're trying to write a book. It blocks you in the art that you create. It blocks you from starting a brand new, beautiful journal when you are afraid to make one mark because you are seeking that perfection and you will end up not making any marks at all. And then if you do make all the perfect marks, does that really show your personality?Does that really show the feeling, the emotion of basically all the things that you need when you're creating art? Stop boring about being so perfect. It blocks you. Highlighting the importance of every moment, even the hardships. Accept things as they are, and as they come. Appreciate your life where it is now and work towards your goals from there. Strive for excellence, but don't get caught up in perfectionism.Live your own perfect life with all its precious imperfections. It sounds like I'm telling you what to do. Really. I'm telling myself what to do right now because we're in the midst of such a limbo that this is why we're talking about what we're talking about today because it's a lesson that I had to make myself sit down and bring to use. Appreciating what doesn't seem so great. Transcript: Wabi Sabi Friend [00:00:00] Fawn: Brilliant moment. It was a brilliant moment for you.

The etymology of "Voice" is explored, plus...why we're so divided as a society, as a country, as a dot dot dot... (fill in the blank). Matt, talks about the techie side of things, how tech is responsible, how it contributed to the division that we're experiencing, and something he found out that is very interesting about the structure of our government that's led to this division, and Fawn's thoughts on why the division exists and how she thinks it's a tool to keep people disempowered. We turn to Ruth Jefferson from Voice of the Middle Ground and speak with her about the state of our society and discuss the art of building community and connections to build a better way. Transcript The Middle Ground [00:00:00] Fawn: Hi, welcome back everybody. Welcome to our friendly world. Hello? [00:00:04] Matt: Hello hello!. [00:00:06] Fawn: We're here. We have a new friend to introduce you to today. Yeah, we do. Before we get into introducing you to this beautiful new friend in your life, I was looking at etymology of certain words again, and I looked up the word voice; The sound made by the human mouth with, see, I don't like it when people or definitions always go to the human being. They don't think that other creatures on the planet have voice. [00:00:37] Matt: Right, right, right. Like my buddy growing up, they had a, they had a parrot that could mimic the mother's voice. [00:00:43] Fawn: Is this the racist parrot or the racist duck? There was a racist duck, [00:00:46] Matt: racist duck. And actually, uh, actually the parrot was racist too. [00:00:50] Fawn: Okay. Fantastic. All right. So. Late 13th century. [00:00:55] Matt: Maybe we should actually describe why, as opposed to just letting that go. [00:00:59] Fawn: What do you mean? Okay. [00:01:00] Matt: It's because they had a neighbor, Bill who

This episode is on the art of the empty cup in many ways. We begin with the breath. So many times we're told to BREATHE! This may be advice that may be causing you more distress. The true way is to NOT TAKE the breath, but ALLOW the breath. This "allowing" works not only with the art of breath, but the art of friendship, and the art of life and creating a happy and fulfilling life. Baby Step - Allowing for Emptiness to Fill the Cup [00:00:00] Fawn: Welcome back to our friendly world. Hi everyone. Welcome back. Bonjour! Hello. Good morning. Good afternoon. Good evening. Remember we used to go through the whole spiel when we first started recording. Anyway. Hi everyone. Welcome back. We have a baby-step for you today, a short, quick one. You ready? A baby step towards a better friendship, a better society. Are you ready? Okay, it's funny. How, um, I'm just going to get into it. All right. Here it is. Are you ready? Ready? Ready? Here it is. Don't take the breath. Allow the breath. It's interesting. How things come? I was so turned off by the whole yoga world. I was teaching it. I was teaching yoga. I was so done with the environment and the white fragility, I saw that I just, I had to be away from that group, but yoga has been so coming back into my life and I know that I'm going to be teaching again on a massive scale. I've been getting these messages, this one, guess where the message came from. I'll just tell you. You'll never guess it. Well, first of all, I want to, okay. I'll tell you for us where it came from, it came from The Society of Children's Book Authors. They're called SC BWI society of children's book authors. There was an author that was speaking. Her name is Meg Fleming, so lovely. So she was saying that someone was telling her this. It was beautifully woven into the lesson of the day, talking about writing children's books, but that was the message. Don't take the breath, allow the breath. I'm going to get into that in just a second, but I want to say it's really interesting how artists and artists and by artists, I mean, I include the whole family painters, writers, singers musicians, photographers, you know, the whole crew. [00:02:10] Matt: Right. I thought you actually meant our family, which is apropos as well. [00:02:14] Fawn: It's all family, but yeah. one of the classes I was taking with Vanessa, Vanessa Brentley-Newton, who is a beautiful friend of our show, a beautiful friend in our family, one of the classes I took with her one day. She was saying, you know, like when you draw, sometimes you can get really tense holding the pen or the pencil or the tool in your hand. Right. And sometimes it's even hard to draw a straight line because you're so intent on perfection or whatever you get so tight. And I remember her saying specifically, and she's she spoke a

This episode is on the art of the empty cup in many ways. We begin with the breath. So many times we're told to BREATHE! This may be advice that may be causing you more distress. The true way is to NOT TAKE the breath, but ALLOW the breath. This "allowing" works not only with the art of breath, but the art of friendship, and the art of life and creating a happy and fulfilling life. Baby Step - Allowing for Emptiness to Fill the Cup [00:00:00] Fawn: Welcome back to our friendly world. Hi everyone. Welcome back. Bonjour! Hello. Good morning. Good afternoon. Good evening. Remember we used to go through the whole spiel when we first started recording. Anyway. Hi everyone. Welcome back. We have a baby-step for you today, a short, quick one. You ready? A baby step towards a better friendship, a better society. Are you ready? Okay, it's funny. How, um, I'm just going to get into it. All right. Here it is. Are you ready? Ready? Ready? Here it is. Don't take the breath. Allow the breath. It's interesting. How things come? I was so turned off by the whole yoga world. I was teaching it. I was teaching yoga. I was so done with the environment and the white fragility, I saw that I just, I had to be away from that group, but yoga has been so coming back into my life and I know that I'm going to be teaching again on a massive scale. I've been getting these messages, this one, guess where the message came from. I'll just tell you. You'll never guess it. Well, first of all, I want to, okay. I'll tell you for us where it came from, it came from The Society of Children's Book Authors. They're called SC BWI society of children's book authors. There was an author that was speaking. Her name is Meg Fleming, so lovely. So she was saying that someone was telling her this. It was beautifully woven into the lesson of the day, talking about writing children's books, but that was the message. Don't take the breath, allow the breath. I'm going to get into that in just a second, but I want to say it's really interesting how artists and artists and by artists, I mean, I include the whole family painters, writers, singers musicians, photographers, you know, the whole crew. [00:02:10] Matt: Right. I thought you actually meant our family, which is apropos as well. [00:02:14] Fawn: It's all family, but yeah. one of the classes I was taking with Vanessa, Vanessa Brentley-Newton, who is a beautiful friend of our show, a beautiful friend in our family, one of the classes I took with her one day. She was saying, you know, like when you draw, sometimes you can get really tense holding the pen or the pencil or the tool in your hand. Right. And sometimes it's even hard to draw a straight line because you're so intent on perfection or whatever you get so tight. And I remember her saying specifically, and she's she spoke a

We're all encoded with spectacular gifts, your fabulousness, your greatness translates wherever you go. The BEAUTIFUL Vanessa Brantley-Newton is back, this time with her BRILLIANT husband Ray! They join us from their vacation in Paris, France, and share their adventures, experiences, wisdom, and advice for life, travel, food, love, art, and how to respectfully and lovingly travel the earth. We love connecting with Vanessa and Ray. Join us as we discuss ways our fabulousness translates wherever we go. The world is a small town and it is so good to connect! How is it that even though we may not speak the same language, we can completely understand each other? Is it possible that we all have encoded something in our hearts that can translate for us and enable us to communicate, transcending words? Are there codes that we can access through sacred geometry in our bodies that when we assume a specific posture, can change the way we communicate and the way others are able to understand our inner nature? Vanessa Brantley-Newton on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/vanessabrantleynewton/?hl=en https://www.vanessabrantleynewton.com/ Vanessa's Ted Talk: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SuMBHSZf32c Magasin Sennelier, the art store,the Louvre;store in New York called Pearl Paint, the original store on Canal Street, Maison Bossier https://www.magasinsennelier.art/en/ the Les Frenchies https://lesfrenchiestravel.com/the power pose TRANSCRIPT – The French Connection With Vanessa and Ray [00:00:00] Fawn: Hello, welcome to our friendly world, everyone. Okay, look, look, look, look, look okay if you can't, if you can't see me. Listen, listen, listen, listen to this. And if you can't, if you can't understand the words that I'm saying, like you speak another language. If you can't speak the same language, I want you to feel me out. Just feel me out. I have a message for you. Most of you listening know where the message came from. Where was I when I got the message? Nevermind. Don't say it, but you all know the one room where I receive messages, my guidance of what I'm supposed to do comes and it came today. And I'm so happy to share today with you because we have two beautiful guests. I'm so excited. I've been giggly since we found out yesterday

Sharing stories is the key to bonding. We explain the difference between sharing and telling a story. Then we get to the bad sharing which is another kind of storytelling/sharing (gossip) that destroys our bond, and we use Twitter as an example of how our society has lost the ability to connect. In this episode, we have a solution to bring us back together again. There is a way out of this. There is a way to have a better life, to have a beautiful society. And it's not as hard as you think. You don't have to figure out how to move mountains. You just have to sit in simplicity #Twitter, #gossip, #bonding, #connection, #storytelling, #misinformation, #crazy, #stupid, #the art of friendship, #land of Shinar, #The story of Babel, #Tower of Babel, #fragmentation, #confirmation bias, TRANSCRIPT The Gossipy Friend[00:00:00] Fawn: Yay for us. Hi everybody. Yay for us, meaning all of us together listening right now. Hi everyone. Guess what? I was partaking in a very boring conversation yesterday [00:00:15] Matt: was [00:00:15] Fawn: that with me? You were there, but you were not the reason for the boredom, but you were. I think we were all contributing to the boredom because neither side wanted to talk about anything.Because one side lives and believes radically different than ours. All this [00:00:32] Matt: would be yes, yes. The call [00:00:34] Fawn: with family[00:00:35] Matt: family. [00:00:36] Fawn: So as the conversation was being had on speakerphone and the whole family's at the table, I must admit that I was zoning out ( Matt exclaims sarcastically) and we are surrounded by boxes in our kitchen, at the moment, there was one box that was in front of me and it had in big, big letters "BELONG", like belong B E L O N G. And I started to play like, oh, what other words can I make out of belong? And so I realized with belong, you can create "ONE GLOBE". We all belong to one globe. So I was tripping out on that, the whole conversation; one global. Am I the only one tripping out on that?Isn't that great?!?! Anyway, [00:01:20] Matt: you know, actually, nevermind. [00:01:21] Fawn: No, go ahead. [00:01:22] Matt: Well, I wrote a computer program because that's what I do. And I programmed peoples, I programmed all of the house names of the house into it. And as it turns out, if I scramble up the letters in ALLEGRA, it actually spells like a genus of birds or something random.I mean, it's weird. Yeah, nobody else's full names came out to anything, but,[00:01:43] Fawn: but collectively our names come to "FAME". [00:01:46] Matt: Well, that's the first letter of each [00:01:48] Fawn: that's as complex as I can get.[00:01:50] Matt: I understand. Oh my God. I should get all the letters together. Scramble them up. [00:01:56] Fawn: Okay. Stop. So we digress. We have digressed even before we have started, we have a really good show today.Oh, well, you know, show we have a really important topic we want to talk about. We're really eager to get into. So I'm going to start. And then Matt, you come in. Okay. Matt is covering his mouth cause I told them don't you interrupt me? Let me, let me get my thoughts out first because I am the Chewbacca. I can't play games with people. If you interrupt me, or if you disagree with me or if you win, I get really mad, I, I can't function after that in a normal way.Matt is looking away. All right. So here we go. Initially, we were going to talk about the, what did we call it initially? The title we were going to use[00:02:47] Matt: "The Disagreeable Friend" , [00:02:48] Fawn: "The Disagreeable Friend" , and as we were delving into it, I realized, oh my goodness, this goes back to what we learned some years ago that, people get labeled as crazy or stupid.Right? When you are no longe

Let's look at the word, the concept, and the root of Ikigai, which is about giving everyday meaning and joy. Let's look at the Ikigai. The word Ikigai comes from Iki meaning, life and gai, meaning, value. Ikigai can be interpreted as the values in your life that make it worth living. We're going to talk about how that relates to work, in the corporate world, in the business world, and most importantly, how that works in our lives; with our friendships with our families, with the joy in life. This episode is about Ikigai, joy, happiness, life purpose, how we see the world, Who and What we love, how we make a difference, where we excel, passion, values, possibilities, gifts, the value in life, the art of finding true friendship, the art of friendship, and moving towards a meaningful life.

Ceremony, what does it really mean? What is it? What is a daily ceremony? It's an intentional routine that's connected with how you start, how you move through, or how you end your day, the goal of ceremony is to be aware of time passing, but not to stress out about it;to observe it and notice that it counts. The little things in life, count. Why do we have ceremony? They make life's, essential moments. They may reflect our beliefs, hopes, our traditions, culture, and spirituality. It's a way to bring people together and provide a sense of belonging. A ritual is defined by psychologists as a predefined sequence of symbolic actions. Rituals make us less anxious. Ritualistic practices can help to bring a degree of predictability to an uncertain future. They convince our brains of constancy. It brings about a sense of predictability. TRANSCRIPT The Art of Ceremony [00:00:00] Fawn: Hi, welcome back. We've got a good one for you today. Folks. We've got a great one for you today. Folks. Welcome back everybody to our friendly world. Today we're talking ceremony and I have a whole thing I'm going to go through and Matt's probably going to get mad at me because that's what he does. He has his notes. I guarantee you I've become divergent. So I'm going to start first. And then Matt, you're just going to have to like flow with it. Here we go. The art of ceremony, ceremony as a work of art, I'm here to comfort you. We're here to comfort you, the opposite of people saying; I'm going to challenge you to something. So today I'm going to comfort you with something it's the opposite of, I'm going to challenge you to do something because we all have enough that we're challenged by. Thank you very much. We're challenged enough, taxed enough, overworked, overtired, overdone, We need comfort. There's so much out there that could seem so out of control. Like you have the feeling the sense that there's no rhyme or reason to anything that the world is crazy, if you look at it through the news, or if you listen to certain people. Life can seem out of control, like there's no sense to anything. For us, we just went through a ceremony of the end of life ceremony. Matt's mother passed away. And so I'm looking at Matt's dad and I got an email from your brother, basically saying, you know, this is what dad's been going through. Over the years he's felt a sense of losing control. He gave me a whole list of things that your dad has lost control of. in life, with his body, with just everything in life and that's his perception, right? We all can look at life and we can see things differently depending on how we look at it. What is our thought form? What is our belief system? Our belief systems can create a whole other life from one incident to another. So today we're talking about the art of ceremony and how ritual, ceremony, all of that can really help us with friendship, with feeling connected with turning our lives around and creating the life that we really want. So I looked at the etymology of first ceremony, and then it led me thr

It was about the ceremony. It was about the experience. It was about the grief. It was about the, it was about my mom. It wasn't about these random people. I don't care really don't care. And honestly, don't care. So that's me, but just be careful with your words out there folks. Cause the problem is, is my dad said you are a disappointment, not that very disappointing or I'm disappointed that you're not coming. He said you are a disappointment. Because that's his attempt to define my entire being versus defining an action. So just be careful, be careful at work. I was told very early on by somebody who wasn't particularly wise, but God, he nailed this one. You never say, you know, Bad. You say the work you did today was bad because it's inherently different. You're not ascribing value to the person you're ascribing value to the work the person produces. It's entirely different. This episode is about the friends who are disappointed; the people you can't please, and how to follow your own guidance in life. TRANSCRIPT Fawn: I have things on my mind, and I don't want to lose it because yesterday I said, let's talk about this on the show with, with, with the outbursts that I have been having that I was holding in for a few days. So let's get going before I lose my nerve or just lose it, like whatever. I don't know. Um, all right. If you're about a quick, hello, you're bound to disappoint everybody at some point. So don't worry about. When people say they're disappointed in you, that disappointed friend, not only that today is not about the disappointing friend or, um, well, maybe disappointing friend that could be you. We're going to use ourselves as an example to talk about what we're talking about today to really convey the message out there that you're bound to disappoint others in life. Okay. It has very little to do with you is, is my understanding, because I'll tell you the whole thing and we're going to use ourselves as the example. Matt is leaning back and kind of bracing himself because it's mostly about him today. Um, bear with me. So it's not just the disappointed friend. It is the self-absorbed friends, the distraught friend, the born. Okay. I'm going to put this in quotes, "born of an older generation" friend, the "stuck in the old way" friend. Here we go. So, like I said, living life, living your authentic life, living, what you think is right for you and your immediate surroundings from your perspective, no one else can see your perspective, but you, so when you make decisions based on that, and it's not to say that you don't you're, uh, you're not caring about other people or other situations, you know, most of us are. And that's what makes some decisions so gut wrenching, that's why certain situations in life are so hard. And you waste a lot of time going back and forth because you do see the other perspective, but no one very few people, especially these days have the capacity to put themselves in your shoes and really understand where you're coming from to have compassion, not only for themselves, but for you and why you're making the decisions that you're making. Saying that that's one of the reasons why people get disappointed when you realize really you are responsible for your life, you are responsible for the decisions that you make. You are responsible for seeing your perspective and you have to live by that. And there are consequences. So what does that really mean?

How can a compliment open the doors to friendship or even save someone's life? We discuss in this episode of "The Art of the Compliment" as we understand the ways to establish joy, kindness, and sincerity and see how a compliment is an invitation to a beautiful friendship. What is the difference between COMPLIMENT and COMPLEMENT? We discuss this question and much more. TRANSCRIPT [00:00:00] Fawn: you complete me Hello? Hello. Hello. Welcome back. Are you ready for a very intense, not intense in a negative way, but an in depth topic, a topic I'm actually going to teach a course on [00:00:14] Matt: super serious. [00:00:16] Fawn: It's not super serious, but it has a lot of moving parts and it's quite deep actually. [00:00:22] Matt: Would you it more nuanced?. [00:00:23] Fawn: I don't like that word, but it's the art of the compliment. [00:00:32] Matt: Oh, dear. [00:00:32] Fawn: Much like when you come into our home and all of the different homes we've had since the big house we used to own that, you know, through the pitfalls of society, went to hell and ever since then, we've been so gunshy. Ugh, gunshy. We've been so resistant on owning property ever again because of what happened in the financial crisis some years ago, that is, seems to be happening again. But whatever, we've moved a lot since then, and it's never been a place that's been ours, it's been some rentals and some of them have been ugly, depressing, just ugly , gray. It started with the first apartment we had after we lost the house. it was Valentine's day. We've said this story before. Sorry, but quick refresher. It was Valentine's day. Matt had this job with this horrible person there that was stressing him out so much. It was awful. It was horrible. It was Valentine's day. And. I was teaching our little, little, little girls and I decided, all right, let's do an art project. We cut hundreds of hearts out of different kinds of paper, different colors, everything. And then I got like sewing thread and I attached them to the hearts and I hung them on the ceiling. I taped them on the ceiling in the entryway. So when Matt came home, he had to walk through this hall of hearts. So many hearts and they were low enough where his

We discuss the art of conversation as the basis for the art of friendship, as we share three main components for conversing (Invite Insight Incite). We explore social-emotional learning and how we can feel and dance together no matter how difficult the topic of conversation or the particular life situation we may be in. #conversation, #Invite, #Invitation, #Insight, #Incite, #TheArtofConversation, #Social-emotionalLearning, #Theartoffriendship, #ESL https://www.ourfriendlyworldpodcast.com/ Transcript [00:00:00] Fawn: Welcome back to our friendly world, everyone. [00:00:03] Matt: Hello [00:00:04] Fawn: Reflecting on the art of friendship, we are starting a conversation on the art of conversation. I'm gonna start with some definitions. First, obviously conversation. Let's look at that. It's a noun the use of speech for informal exchange of views, ideas or information simple. Right? [00:00:25] Matt: Sounds like it. [00:00:26] Fawn: Well, you know, I always try to have conversation, but you really have to get a feel for what's going on and you have to get a feel for what the person is going through and where they stand in life. Do they have a very strong core, a strong sense of self. I wanna say that previous generations didn't have that, or they didn't have that once they started experiencing a lot of other stresses, a lot of other things that would cause them to stretch, for example, having children or just, you know, Obviously with having children, it causes you to be thinking of other people and having your lives have this inter dance back and forth. I'm just talking about this because everything you're going through with your family right now, right? Your mom is passing. People under duress or under stress. Start misbehaving and there's no. Oh, here we go. Matt's going to start. Um, no, well, I'm keep it easy. The apologia starts coming in. So, you know, when you're speaking with someone, they don't hear what you're saying. When you speak to a crowd, when you're speaking to one person, they only can understand through a filtered process of their own experiences in life for them to understand what you're saying. So they're not hearing what you are saying. They're hearing only from their perspective. So for example, if they're used to looking at certain shades of blue all the time,