The UCB Word For Today

Question: since we're naturally drawn to people who love us, why is it so difficult for us to go to God in prayer? Answer: because we need a fresh revelation of His love for us! Paul prayed that the Ephesian church would ‘be able to take in…the extravagant dimensions of Christ's love' (Ephesians 3:18 MSG). The word ‘extravagant' means going above and beyond all that's expected or deserved. The truth is, God couldn't love you any more than He does right now. ‘What's His love like?' you ask. Look at the cross. Had you been the only person who ever lived, Jesus would have died just for you. ‘What does His love cost?' you ask. Nothing! It comes with no strings attached. You didn't do anything to deserve it, and when you mess up, you don't forfeit it. ‘Absolutely nothing can get between us and God's love' (Romans 8:39 MSG). Once you accept that, you can acknowledge your weaknesses, seek God's help, grow strong, and use the talents He has given you. When you believe God loves you based on who you are in Christ, you have the ultimate self-esteem – born of God's esteem for you. And since His is the only ‘perfect love', it removes your ‘fear'. So, what are you afraid of? That you won't get what you need? That you will lose something you have? John tells us: ‘His perfect love for us eliminates all dread…If we are afraid, it…shows…we are not fully convinced that he really loves us' (1 John 4:18 TLB). Ask God today for a fresh revelation of His love for you, bearing in mind that what He loves, He prizes, protects, and provides for.

The psalmist highlights two important things Bible reading does for you: 1) It shows you your spiritual condition. In Bible times there were no paved roads, so when guests entered a house, they paused to wash the sand, dirt, and grime from their feet. That's what Bible reading does. David said, ‘How can a young man [and an older one] cleanse his way? By taking heed according to Your word' (v. 9 NKJV). 2) It shows you the direction you need to go. Your word is…a light to my path.' When you're faced with an important decision and you don't know which way to go, God will guide you through His Word. David, who loved God's Word and meditated on it constantly, prayed, ‘Teach me to do Your will, for You are my God; Your Spirit is good. Lead me in the land of uprightness' (Psalm 143:10 NKJV). Many of the mistakes we make could be prevented if we stopped long enough to seek God's guidance. He knows what lies ahead; we don't. So ‘commit your way to the LORD, trust also in Him, and He shall bring it to pass' (Psalm 37:5 NKJV). Just like children need to be taught to cultivate a taste for healthy food instead of junk food, you need to cultivate a taste for God's Word. The psalmist said, ‘I will delight myself in Your commandments, which I love' (Psalm 119:47 NKJV). ‘Your word is very pure; therefore Your servant loves it' (v. 140 NKJV). Today ask God to give you a love for His Word. That's a prayer He will answer!

Another word for meditation is rumination. Rumination is what a cow is doing when she chews her cud. The cow eats grass, chews all she can, and then swallows it. It sits in one of her stomachs for a while, and then a little later, she burps it up – with renewed flavour. The cow chews on it some more and swallows it again. This process continues in all four stomachs. That's rumination. The cow is pulling every ounce of nourishment from the grass. And meditation is simply thought digestion. Meditation doesn't mean putting your mind in neutral and thinking about nothing. On the contrary, it's thinking seriously about what you're reading. For example, you dwell on one verse of Scripture and ask, ‘What does this mean for my life?' You talk to yourself about it and talk to God about it. The Bible says this: ‘Keep your minds on whatever is true, pure, right, holy, friendly, and proper. Don't ever stop thinking about what is truly worthwhile and worthy of praise…And God, who gives peace, will be with you' (Philippians 4:8-9 CEV). Notice that we are to ponder different categories of things and, by implication, to avoid thinking about the opposite kind of things. Colossians 3:16 says, ‘Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly' (KJV). You need to spend time every day – a minimum of ten to fifteen minutes – where you sit down, read a portion of the Bible, and think deeply about what you have just read. Then talk to the Lord about it in prayer. That's the starting point for spiritual change and growth.

Someone has wisely said, ‘You're not what you think you are, but what you think – you are.' Lasting change always begins with new thinking. How do you become a Christian? By repenting of your sin and placing your trust in Christ. The Greek word for repentance is metanoia, and it means to change your mind. We're not changed by willpower, but by the transforming power of God's Word when we use it to renew our minds each day. The Bible clearly teaches that the way we think determines the way we feel, and the way we feel determines the way we act. So if you want to change your actions, you have to return to the source and change the way you think. At times you may act resentful. Why? Because you feel resentful. And do you know why you feel resentful? Because you are thinking resentful thoughts. The same is true of anger, worry, lust, and other destructive thought patterns. Jesus said, ‘You will know the truth, and the truth will set you free' (John 8:32 NLT). When you base your life on truth – when you live with the right kind of thoughts, not misconceptions or false beliefs, and you base your life on thinking from God's Word – you will be set free. You will find your old habits, feelings, and actions beginning to fall away. When you focus solely on removing bad thoughts, you create a vacuum into which the bad thoughts can return. But when you replace bad thoughts with good ones – scriptural ones – you are empowered by God to live the life of blessing He wants you to enjoy.

Another way God changes us is through circumstances. Problems, pressures, sorrows, hardships, and stress always get our attention. C.S. Lewis said, ‘Pain insists on being attended to. God whispers to us in our pleasures…but shouts to us in our pain.' The J.B. Phillips translation of Romans 8:28-29 reads: ‘To those who love God, who are called according to his plan, everything that happens fits into a pattern for good. God…chose them to bear the family likeness of his Son.' Nothing can come into your life without your heavenly Father's permission; it must be ‘Father filtered'. The interesting thing about how God uses circumstances is that their source makes no difference to Him. We often bring problems on ourselves. Sometimes they're caused by other people. Other times the Enemy causes things to happen to us. But the source of the circumstances is irrelevant. God said, ‘I will make it fit into my plan for your life, to make you like Jesus Christ.' That means there is no circumstance from which we can't learn if we maintain the right attitude. Why did Solomon say, ‘Blows and wounds scrub away evil, and beatings purge the inmost being'? Because we change only when our fear of change is surpassed by our pain. If you want to become more like Jesus, think about this: ‘Though He was a Son, yet He learned obedience by the things which He suffered' (Hebrews 5:8 NKJV). If God used the challenges, conflicts, and circumstances of life to prepare His Son for His destiny, won't He do the same in our lives? So instead of trying to escape your circumstances, learn from them and grow stronger.

One of the ways God changes us is through His Word. ‘All Scripture is inspired by God and is useful to teach us what is true and to make us realise what is wrong in our lives. It corrects us when we are wrong and teaches us to do what is right. God uses it to prepare and equip his people to do every good work' (vv. 16-17 NLT). The story is told of a converted cannibal in the South Sea islands. He was sitting by a large pot reading his Bible when an anthropologist approached him and asked, ‘What are you doing?' The native replied, ‘I'm reading the Bible.' The anthropologist scoffed and said, ‘Don't you know that modern, civilised man has rejected that book? It's nothing but a pack of lies. You shouldn't waste your time reading it.' The cannibal looked him over from head to toe and slowly replied, ‘Sir, if it weren't for this book – you'd be in that pot!' The Word of God had changed his life – and his appetite. If you're serious about changing your life, you have to get into the Bible. You need to read it, study it, memorise it, meditate on it, speak it, and apply it. ‘But my faith is weak,' you say. Are you reading your Bible regularly? Are you studying it? Are you memorising it? No? Then how do you expect your faith to grow? The Bible says, ‘Faith comes by hearing, and hearing by the word of God' (Romans 10:17 NKJV). Bottom line: the Spirit of God uses the Word of God to make us more like the Son of God.

The Bible says, ‘Work out your own salvation…for it is God who works in you both to will and to do for His good pleasure.' This Scripture almost sounds like a contradiction, doesn't it? But instead, it is a paradox. And G.K. Chesterton described a paradox as ‘truth standing on its head to get attention'. The key to understanding this particular paradox lies in the little word out. Notice that the Bible doesn't say, ‘Work for your salvation.' To work for something means to earn it, deserve it, merit it. And the Bible plainly teaches that salvation isn't something we have to work for or earn. It's a free gift of God's grace (see Ephesians 2:8-9). When Paul says, ‘Work out your salvation,' he is talking about a ‘spiritual workout'. What do you do during a physical workout? You develop and tone the muscles God has already provided you. To ‘work out' means to grow and make the most of what you have been given. What Paul is saying here is this: develop your spiritual life! God has a part in our spiritual growth, and we, too, have a part. He provides the power, but we must access it, flip the switch, and let it flow through our lives to fulfil His will for us. Practically speaking, how do we do that? By spending time praying and reading God's Word each day. By sharpening and strengthening one another through fellowship. By exercising the gifts God has given us. The fact is, He has already done His part; now it's up to you to do yours.

Every plague God sent on Egypt mocked one of their gods. For instance, the Egyptians worshipped a goddess with the head of a frog, so God sent them a lot of frogs.. Finally, Pharaoh called for Moses and said, ‘All right, I give up.' But when Moses asked him, ‘When do you want me to get rid of the frogs?' Pharaoh's response was classic; he said, ‘Tomorrow.' He must have been insane! Why would you wait any longer to have the frogs removed? But we do the same, don't we? We procrastinate by putting off the changes we know would be good for us. Maybe we're unconcerned. Maybe we're too lethargic to change. Maybe we're fearful because we don't know what the changes will entail. Maybe we're just too proud and stubborn. Whatever the reason – we procrastinate. NASA space engineers tell us most of the fuel that is used in a rocket launch is burned during the initial few seconds of lift-off. It takes enormous energy and thrust to move the rocket off the launching pad. Once it's moving and headed for orbit, it needs much less fuel and is simpler to control and direct. It has conquered inertia. It's one thing to know God can solve your problem and change your life. It's another matter to overcome your inertia and let Him begin to do it now! We keep saying, ‘One of these days…' The truth is, Jesus Christ has the power to make changes in your life today. He will give you the power to begin and the power to keep going. It's not too late. He can put your life back together again. So the word for today is – do it today!

A good leader is like a ship's good captain; they plan the whole trip in their mind before they leave the dock. They have a clear vision of their destination, they understand what it will take to get there, they know who needs to be on board for the trip to be successful, and they recognise obstacles long before they appear on the horizon. And because they prepare well, good leaders can take their people just about anywhere. Moses was such a leader. He spent forty days praying and fasting on a mountain, refusing to leave until he understood what God wanted him to do. Then he came back and communicated it to the people so they could participate in the vision. In Leadership Promises For Your Week, Dr John Maxwell writes: ‘As a good leader, Moses methodically arranged the tribal camps in the wilderness (see Numbers 2:34). We would do well to…organise as he did. 1) Give time for planning and organising. Determine your primary purpose. 2) Understand where you are before trying to develop a strategy. 3) Prioritise the needs and goals of the team by asking the right questions. 4) Write goals that are realistic, measurable, and convicting. 5) Clarify goals and communicate with your team. 6) Identify possible obstacles. Have an open system approach to your planning. 7) Budget your cost and time by scheduling everything you can and setting deadlines. 8) Study the results. Evaluation prevents stagnation and exaggeration.' If you want God to bless your plan, you must have a plan He can bless. And it must come from God Himself. So, talk to God today about His plan for your life.

On a cold day, have you ever tried breathing on your hands to restore warmth and life? That's like what happens when you meditate on God's Word, because ‘all Scripture is God-breathed'. Imagine yourself at a party where people are blowing up balloons and popping them with pins. A scientist could figure out which balloon was yours because your DNA (the genetic configuration that makes you unique) is in your breath. Now apply that principle to reading the Bible, and you will understand how vital it is to your spiritual life. John tells us ‘the Word was God' (John 1:1 NKJV), so anytime you ingest God's Word, you're ingesting His attributes. That's why the Enemy will try to keep you so busy that you have no time to read your Bible. The truth is, many of the issues we struggle with could be resolved or eliminated altogether if we developed a hunger for God's Word. Job said, ‘I have not departed from the commandment of His lips; I have treasured the words of His mouth more than my necessary food' (Job 23:12 NKJV). Jeremiah, who was so dejected that he became known as ‘the weeping prophet', said, ‘Your words were found, and I ate them, and Your word was to me the joy and rejoicing of my heart' (Jeremiah 15:16 NKJV). Jesus experienced every test and trial known to man; He even went toe-to-toe with the Tempter. What was the secret of His strength? He said, ‘It is written, “Man shall not live by bread alone, but by every word that proceeds from the mouth of God”' (Matthew 4:4 NKJV). Today get God's Word into you – it's His DNA.

In Scripture, to be faithful means to be steady, stable, dependable, and consistent. Do those attributes describe you? They should, because faithfulness pays big dividends with God. ‘A faithful man will abound with blessings' (Proverbs 28:20 NKJV). Jesus said, ‘Many are called, but few chosen' (Matthew 20:16 NKJV). Why is that? Because talent may open the door and get you the job, but character and faithfulness will keep you there. When it comes to faithfulness, God will test you in two ways: 1) Your faithfulness in someone else's vision. ‘If you have not been faithful in what is another man's, who will give you what is your own?' (Luke 16:12 NKJV). If you're critical, caustic, complaining, competitive, or constantly comparing yourself with others, you will be disqualified for what God has in mind for you. Faithfulness calls for serving with love and humility. 2) Your faithfulness in small things. ‘His lord said to him, “Well done, good and faithful servant; you have been faithful over a few things, I will make you ruler over many things…For to everyone who has, more will be given…but from him who does not have, even what he has will be taken away”' (Matthew 25:23, 29 NKJV). God wants to know He can trust you. You prove that by how well you serve others and by your faithfulness in small things. These are proven biblical principles that don't just work in spiritual matters, but in everyday life. So today, take a few moments to prayerfully ask yourself the question, ‘Am I faithful?' When you are, God will bless you.

Paul writes: ‘I press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus. Let us therefore, as many as be perfect [mature], be thus minded: and if in any thing ye be otherwise minded, God shall reveal even this unto you' (vv. 14-15 KJV). Paul describes the Christian as a marksman. In Paul's day, the mark would have been hit by an arrow, but in our day, the mark could also be hit at a firing range. If you have ever fired at a target, you know this: 1) Your aim must be unbroken by distractions. When you have the bullseye in your crosshairs, something as insignificant as taking a breath at the wrong moment can make you miss the mark. So what is Paul saying? Simply this: ‘Forget what's behind you and around you and stay focused on winning the prize.' He is not referring to your salvation. Jesus already purchased that and gives it to you freely by grace. No, he is talking about fulfilling your God-given destiny and obtaining the reward that waits beyond it. 2) Your bullet has to have the right amount of powder. Otherwise, it will start dropping off before it hits the mark. Are you getting the idea? Your powder is your power! And where does your power come from? The Holy Spirit! Jesus said: ‘You shall receive power when the Holy Spirit has come upon you; and you shall be witnesses to Me in Jerusalem [at home], and in all Judea and Samaria [on the job and in your relationships], and to the end of the earth' (Acts 1:8 NKJV). So the word for today is – aim for the mark.

The Bible says, ‘By faith Jacob, when he was dying…worshipped, leaning on the top of his staff.' Picture this: each time Jacob had an experience with God, he took a knife and cut a ring around his staff as a reminder of what happened. The rings started at the bottom and worked their way to the top. One would surely have symbolised the night he wrestled with God and his name was changed to ‘Israel…a prince…with God' (Genesis 32:28 KJV). Another would have represented the night God showed him a vision of a ladder extending into heaven with angels on it. In short, Jacob's staff represented a lifetime of experiences with God. So, it's not surprising that he died worshipping God – and leaning on his staff! Now consider the story of the Shunammite woman in 2 Kings 4. Her son suddenly became ill and died, so Elisha sent his servant Gehazi ahead with his staff to let the woman know he was coming. But when Gehazi placed the prophet's staff on the dead boy, nothing happened. Only when Elisha himself came was the child restored (see 2 Kings 4:32-35). The fact is, you can't lean on anyone's staff but your own! You can't stand on anyone else's experience with God but yours. When it's time to face life's challenges – including death – you can only lean on the faith you have developed during your personal walk with God. That's why it's essential to be faithful and consistent in your spiritual journey. By leaning on his staff when he was dying, Jacob, in essence, declared, ‘The God who preserved, protected, and prospered me thus far will take me the rest of the way.' What blessed assurance!

In What the World Owes to Christians, Dr Victor Pierce, an Oxford scholar, shares the story of the typewriter. ‘The typewriter was a forerunner to the modern word processor. But how did a Christian come to invent it? To write sermons. Seriously! Christopher Sholes was concerned about his pastor who'd been busy all week visiting victims of an epidemic, comforting the bereaved and conducting funerals. Consequently he had no time to write his Sunday sermons. One day Sholes, discussing with a friend what could be done, said, “It seems a pity there ain't some quick method of writing for busy folks like parsons.” His friend replied, “Why not invent a machine?” Sholes responded, “I'll try.” That rainy afternoon was the beginning of months of hard work. Finally a group assembled one day to see him tap out on paper, in capital letters, C LATHAM SHOLES, NOV 1867. Six years later the Remingtons recognised the typewriter as something that could revolutionise business. In those days clerks were mostly men, but the Young Women's Christian Association started offering courses in typing for women. Initially it created a scandal, but as the first typists to be trained were women, employers rushed to hire them. Hence the typewriter and the YWCA determined that a woman's place was not only at home, but could also be in the office.' Is it okay for me to pray for God to bless my business? Yes! God wants to bless your business so that you can help carry out His, which is the business of reaching the world with the gospel.

One God-given idea can change so much. Braille sure did! In 1824, Louis Braille, a Christian, invented a system of raised dots on paper so that blind people could read. He invented 63 symbols representing every language, hence God's Word was placed into the hands of the visually impaired for the first time. And communications? In part, you owe your mobile phone and your computer to a Christian named Samuel Morse. How different the world was before him! First-class news took two weeks to reach the USA. And reports of a major victory could take six weeks to reach Britain. One day a friend said, ‘Morse, when you were experimenting did you ever come to an absolute deadlock, not knowing what to do?' Morse replied, ‘More than once.' His friend asked, ‘What did you do then?' Morse shared a secret, ‘I got down on my knees and prayed for light, and light came, and when my inventions were acknowledged by flattering honours from America and Europe, I said, “Not unto me, O Lord, not unto me, but unto Thy name give the glory.”' That's why the first message sent by transatlantic cable read, ‘What God has wrought.' Now add another Christian named Louis Pasteur, the French scientist who showed us that infection is the result of things we cannot see, namely germs and viruses. He introduced sterilisation methods that eventually saved the lives of multitudes. Think God has run out of good ideas? Not a chance! Ask Him for one for your life, your ministry or your business!

Good ideas come from God, so ask Him for one. The world's been blessed by those who did. Consider anaesthesia: how would you like to be operated on without it? That is the way they did it until a Scottish doctor named James Young Simpson introduced something he called ‘artificial sleep'. As a student at Edinburgh University he was attracted to surgery because he was troubled by the pain and mortality rate experienced during operations. As a result of reading ‘And the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam' (Genesis 2:21 NKJV), Simpson thought chloroform might be the answer. He first experimented on himself. Finally, in 1847, the first three operations with chloroform took place. One of the patients, a young soldier, enjoyed it so much that he seized the sponge and inhaled again. ‘It was just too good to be stopped,' he said. At first Simpson encountered opposition. Some thought it was a sin to interfere with nature. ‘Hand me the Bible,' said Dr Simpson. ‘This is how God operated on Adam.' Simpson made speeches, wrote letters and pamphlets and tried to convince those who opposed him that this was the way forward. In a setback, when three deaths attributed to chloroform were reported from other hospitals, Simpson was able to show them that they were not applying the anaesthesia correctly. The tide turned when Queen Victoria gave birth to her eighth child under chloroform and declared that she was ‘greatly pleased with its effect'. Today ask God to give you an idea that blesses others. Then act on it!

When food in your fridge goes bad, you know it the moment you open the door. And your life is like that. When there is something wrong inside, the people who come in contact with you often sense it. Jesus spoke some of His harshest words to Peter: ‘Get thee behind me, Satan…for thou savourest [smell] not the things that be of God, but those that be of men' (Matthew 16:23 KJV). What was Peter's sin? Pride. He openly contradicted Jesus (see Matthew 16:22). There are sins of the spirit and sins of the flesh. Peter's was a sin of the spirit, whereas David's was one of the flesh that manifested itself in adultery and murder. Later David wrote, ‘Cleanse me from secret faults. Keep back Your servant also from presumptuous sins; let them not have dominion over me' (Psalm 19:12-13 NKJV). Now, God doesn't want you to become self-absorbed and introspective to the point where you live in condemnation. But He does want you to be sensitive to sin and deal with it immediately. Scripture gives us three ways to stay clean in a spiritually polluted world. 1) Walking in the light (see 1 John 1:7). That means striving to be honest before God and man. 2) Being accountable. That can mean having someone in your life who is mature enough to deserve your confidence, gracious enough to put up with your inconsistencies, and honest enough to confront you (see Ecclesiastes 4:9). 3) Dealing with your sin right away (see Psalm 32:3-5). The moment that brings consciousness of sin should lead to confession of sin resulting in cleansing of sin. Then you must get back up and go on with God!

There is a natural mindset, and there is a spiritual mindset. To live victoriously, you must develop a spiritual mindset. The Bible says: ‘The person without the Spirit does not accept the things that come from the Spirit of God…and cannot understand them because they are [spiritually] discerned…But we have the mind of Christ' (1 Corinthians 2:14, 16 NIV). As you programme your life in accordance with God's Word and consciously submit yourself to do His will every day, He will plant His thoughts in your mind. What an advantage! For example, someone criticises you and your feelings get hurt. In that moment the Lord speaks to you and says, ‘Yes, your feelings are hurt, but part of it is just wounded vanity and we can deal with that. I love you despite all your baggage. Your standing with me isn't at risk. The person who criticised you may see a flaw. But nobody thinks you're perfect anyway, and it's better not to have to pretend. Here is a chance to grow. Use it!' Even though there are elements of pain in these kinds of thoughts, instead of paralysing you, they energise you. They're true, they give you ground to stand on, and you realise that if you can keep your mind centred on them, the right feelings and actions are more likely to flow from them. Now you're starting to live out the promise, ‘Thou wilt keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on thee: because he trusteth in thee' (Isaiah 26:3 KJV). Instead of focusing on your critics, focus on God, on your spiritual growth, and on what you can learn from the experience.

If a thief came to your door, would you invite them in? No, you would call the police and have them arrested. And that's what you need to do when wrong thoughts come to your mind! Take them captive – before they take you captive. And you must do it the moment the first one tries to enter your mind. When you entertain a thought, you empower it, and it will overcome you. The Bible says, ‘Submit yourselves, then, to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you' (James 4:7 NIV). On your own you don't have the power to resist Satan, so don't try it! But the moment you call on God and submit your will to Him, you're more than a match for Satan. You get to decide who will control your mind: ‘The mind governed by the flesh is death, but the mind governed by the Spirit is life and peace' (Romans 8:6 NIV). When a thought keeps turning over and over in your mind, ask yourself, ‘What direction is this thought leading me in? Is it towards spiritual death, or towards “life and peace”'? Think about it: you don't buy insurance after a storm has flattened your house. If you're wise, you do it before the storm comes. So instead of failing and saying, ‘I'll never be any different,' look back and ask yourself, ‘What was I thinking that led to my failure? Was I in the wrong company, or the wrong place, or the wrong mindset? Have I been reading God's Word and praying regularly? Have I built my life around people who strengthen me?' In the long run, monitoring your mind pays great dividends!

How can you tell when you're depending on people rather than God? When you get upset with your boss because you didn't get the raise you think you deserve. When you become angry with a loved one because he or she turned you down for a loan. When you do things like that, you're sitting at the wrong door waiting for your blessing! Yes, it hurts when your efforts aren't acknowledged. But you must understand this: God will use people as instruments to bless you, but He alone must always be the source of all your blessings! Ponder these Scriptures: ‘You may say to yourself, “My power and the strength of my hands have produced this wealth for me.” But remember the LORD your God, for it is he who gives you the ability to produce wealth' (Deuteronomy 8:17-18 NIV). ‘When God gives someone wealth and possessions, and the ability to enjoy them…this is a gift of God' (Ecclesiastes 5:19 NIV). ‘She has not acknowledged that I was the one who gave her…silver and gold' (Hosea 2:8 NIV). What was her problem? She ignored God and forgot that He was her true source. We generally pursue and nurture relationships that are rewarding – and that's important information. Why? Because only when you recognise God as the source of all your blessings will you commit to nurturing your relationship with Him. That's why Jesus said, ‘Seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well' (Matthew 6:33 NIV). When you pursue God, sow generously into His kingdom, and expect Him to meet your needs – your efforts will be blessed.

When it comes to making commitments and keeping them, Solomon doesn't mince any of his words: ‘Don't shoot off your mouth, or speak before you think…When you tell God you'll do something, do it – now. God takes no pleasure in foolish drivel. Vow it, then do it. Far better not to vow in the first place than to vow and not pay up. Don't let your mouth make a total sinner of you. When called to account, you won't get by with “Sorry, I didn't mean it”' (vv. 2, 4-6 MSG). That means don't be impulsive, listen as much as you speak, get as much information as you can, then consult God in prayer before you make a commitment. People often say what they think others want to hear, but that can get them into a lot of trouble. Don't promise something you can't deliver. And don't make excuses. Nothing diminishes your influence like trying to reverse a mistake with a lame excuse. When you make a commitment based on emotion, you will only follow through if you feel a certain way. True commitment doesn't work like that. It's not a feeling; it's a character quality. Human emotions constantly fluctuate, but commitment has to be rock solid. Real dedication shines through in times of trouble and adversity. It doesn't depend on gifts or abilities, but on integrity. It's a result of choice, not conditions. And it only lasts when it's based on values. Bottom line: ‘Do not be rash with your mouth, and let not your heart utter anything hastily before God' (v. 2 NKJV). So look before you leap, and think before you commit.

As a parent, you're constantly transmitting your values to your children, so do these: 1) Let them see you pray. Help them to understand that prayer is how we build a lifelong friendship with God. And they will need His friendship when you're not around to help them. God said, ‘When they call on me, I will answer; I will be with them in trouble. I will rescue and honour them' (Psalm 91:15 NLT). 2) Show them what God is like. Your child's concept of God is formed by you. Whether you're loving and protective or distant and cold, they will grow up understanding God through the interactions they have with you. Some examples are that God is never too busy to listen, He constantly tells us He loves us, and He is never abusive. Getting the idea? 3) Help them to see God in others. When kids are encouraged to see God at work in their own lives, they begin to discern Him at work in the lives of others too. When that happens, they will value and respect others and be valued and respected in return. That will help them to be secure and successful in life. 4) Don't send them to church; take them. Children need to believe – and belong. Teach them that just like a limb dies that's disconnected from a body, we die spiritually unless we are connected to a local church. ‘Belonging' means they will always have a place to go. The Bible says, ‘Obey his laws…that things will go well for you and your children' (Deuteronomy 4:40 NCV). Helping your kids to find the right path is the greatest gift you can give them.

Unselfishness does three things for you: 1) It improves the quality of your life. It gives you an appreciation for life and a comprehension of its higher values. Seeing people in need and giving to meet those needs sets a lot of things into perspective. One leader writes: ‘There is no life as empty as the self-centred life. There is no life as centred as the self-empty life.' If you want to enhance your world, focus your attention on assisting others. 2) It makes you part of something greater than yourself. In the mid-1980s, Merck & Company, the global pharmaceutical corporation, developed a medication to cure river blindness, a disease that infects and causes blindness in millions of people, mainly in developing countries. While it was a good product, potential customers couldn't afford it. So, what did Merck do? It produced the drug anyway and announced that it would give it free to anyone who needed it. As a result, they gave away more than 250 million tablets. George W. Merck says, ‘We try never to forget that medicine is for the people. It's not for the profits. The profits follow, and if we have remembered that, they have never failed to appear.' The lesson to learn? Simple. Instead of attempting to be great, be part of something greater than yourself. 3) It creates a legacy. Jack Balousek, former president of True North Communications, said, ‘Learn, earn, return – these are the three phases of life.' When you think unselfishly and invest in others, you gain the opportunity to create a legacy that will outlive you. And that should be your goal.

A leader wrote these words: ‘My dad was a busy man…to get him at work you had to go through a switchboard unless you knew his private number. He gave it to a few business partners, but all of his kids had it…We knew, no matter how busy he was, we could call anytime on his direct line. I've the same thing…my kids know my number…they can call me anytime for anything. And you know what? No voices sound sweeter to me than my kids' voices. When one of them says, “Hi, Dad,” it doesn't matter what I'm juggling…they're an absolute priority…Now multiply that out exponentially – and listen to me. Nothing sounds sweeter to God than your voice saying, “Hello, Father.” There's nothing going on in the cosmos that would keep Him from directing His full attention to your conversation or your request.' That means when God is your Father, you can call home anytime. He is never more than a prayer away! Jesus said: ‘Ask, and God will give to you…If your children ask for bread, which of you would give them a stone? Or if your children ask for a fish, would you give them a snake? Even though you are bad, you know how to give good gifts to your children. How much more your heavenly Father will give good things to those who ask him!' (Matthew 7:7, 9-11 NCV). You can talk to God without begging and grovelling, ‘confident that he hears…whenever we ask for anything that pleases him. And…he will give us what we ask for' (1 John 5:14-15 NLT). So, whatever is robbing you of your confidence in prayer, deal with it today.

Jesus said, ‘Love your neighbour as yourself' (Matthew 19:19 NIVUK). But in order to love yourself, you must first be able to respect yourself. And self-respect is based on personal integrity. Author Ted Engstrom tells the following story in his book called Integrity: ‘For Coach Cleveland Stroud and the Bulldogs of Rockdale County High School [Conyers, Georgia], it was their championship season: twenty-one wins and five losses on the way to the Georgia Boys Basketball Tournament last March, then a dramatic come-from-behind victory in the state finals. But now the new glass trophy case outside the high school gymnasium is bare. Earlier this month the Georgia High School Association deprived Rockdale County of the championship after school officials said that a player who was scholastically ineligible had played forty-five seconds in the first of the school's five postseason games. “We didn't know he was ineligible at the time; we didn't know it until a few weeks ago,” Coach Stroud said. “Some people have said we should have just kept quiet about it, that it was just forty-five seconds and the player wasn't an impact player. But you've got to do what's honest and right and what the rules say. I told my team that people forget the scores of basketball games; they don't ever forget what you're made of.”' Every honest or dishonest word and action either adds to or takes away from your character. That's what the Bible means when it says, ‘The integrity of the upright guides them, but the unfaithful are destroyed by their duplicity.' So today, strive for integrity in all your dealings.

In The Message paraphrase we read, ‘For people who hate discipline and only get more stubborn, there'll come a day when life tumbles in and they break, but by then it'll be too late to help them”' (Proverbs 29:1 MSG). King Solomon was reputed to be the wisest man who ever lived. He wrote these words, but sadly he didn't live by them, so he ‘crashed and burned'. And if it could happen to Solomon, none of us are immune! Character has become a crucial issue today because so many political, business, and religious leaders have fallen so publicly. As a leader, you don't operate in a vacuum. You influence many others, and when you fall, they feel the repercussions. When a big oak tree falls, it takes the little trees with it. So how can you guard against falling? By not favouring gifts over character. Today we have an unhealthy tendency to celebrate and reward someone's gift and overlook their character; both must be developed. Character is the sum total of your daily habits. In Psalm 15, David gives us eight traits to look for in a leader worthy of respect: 1) They have integrity. 2) They don't take part in gossip. 3) They don't harm others. 4) They speak up against wrong. 5) They honour those who walk in the truth. 6) They keep their promise, even at personal cost. 7) They're not greedy to profit at the expense of others. 8) They're strong and stable. David concludes his psalm by saying those who do these things ‘will never be shaken'. That's how you keep from falling!

One of the truest tests of leadership is how you respond to somebody else's success. Do you rejoice, or secretly resent them? Do you feel like their blessing somehow came at your expense? King Saul sent David out to fight Goliath. When he succeeded and the Israelites began to sing David's praises, Saul couldn't handle it. ‘From that time on Saul kept a jealous eye on David.' Leaders who lack confidence are a danger to themselves, their followers, and the groups they lead. That's because leadership doesn't camouflage your flaws; it puts them on display. Whatever negative baggage you're carrying grows heavier when you attempt to lead others. Insecure leaders generally have four common traits: 1) They don't provide security for others. To be a good leader, you must make your followers feel good about themselves. Honour them. Reward them. Promote them. 2) They take more than they give. Insecure leaders are on a continual search for validation, acknowledgement, and love. And because of that, their focus is on obtaining personal security, not instilling it in others. 3) They continually limit their best people. Insecure leaders don't see their best people as co-workers; they see them as potential competitors who might rise up through the ranks and threaten their position. Such leaders generally find ways to take the credit for work that was done by others. 4) They continually limit their organisation. When followers are undermined and go unrecognised, they become disheartened and eventually stop performing to their potential. When that occurs, the whole organisation suffers. Today, examine your leadership style and see if any of these shoes fit you.

Consider some of the people who are enslaved today through no fault of their own – children sold into the sex trade and immigrants sold into forced labour. That's not the kind of slavery Paul is talking about when he writes, ‘You become the slave of whatever you choose to obey.' When it comes to sin, the Bible draws a line in the sand and tells us not to cross it. Why? Because when you cross it once, it's easier to cross it again. Whether your ‘drug of choice' is alcohol, illegal or over-the-counter drugs, pornography, gambling, or overeating, you start out believing you're the master and end up realising you're the slave. One of the biggest lies we tell ourselves is, ‘I can stop whenever I want to.' The Prodigal Son was forgiven and restored, but he still lost his inheritance. Spiritually, you can lose your confidence before God. Personally, you can lose your sense of self-worth. Publicly, you can lose respect and influence with others. And if you're not careful, even ‘good' things can hurt you. A strong work ethic can lead to neglecting your family and losing your marriage. Vegging out in front of the TV can stunt your spiritual growth. Even too much caution and thoughtfulness – good qualities – can prevent you from stepping out in faith and fulfilling your God-given potential. When God says no, He is not being a killjoy and trying to make your life difficult; He is protecting you! If something has the potential to enslave you, don't do it. And if you're already hooked, turn to God and He will set you free.

When our children are young, we're so busy providing them with things like love, protection, discipline, training, and authority that it feels like these responsibilities will go on forever. But they don't. When our children reach their late teens and early twenties, we must open the door for them to the world outside. If you're going through this right now and feeling anxious, try to realise that you're in one of the most challenging and difficult parts of parenting. Your tendency to hold tightly to the reins of control in order to keep your children from making mistakes is natural. But your children are more likely to make good choices if they aren't compelled to rebel in order to achieve their freedom. The simple truth is that responsibility and maturity flourish best in an atmosphere of freedom. ‘As the Scriptures say, “A man leaves his father and mother.”' The secret of success is in granting your child autonomy at the right time, in the right amount, and with the right attitude. Your goal should be to allow independence little by little through the years, as your children are able to manage new responsibility. The final release, then, should represent a small step in the direction of freedom instead of a tumble into anarchy. In the final analysis, we all learn by trial and error. You did, and try as you may to avoid it, your children will, too. ‘So what should I do?' you ask. Pray for them daily, release them into God's care, and let them know that you will always love them and be there for them.

Are you at a place in your life and you'd rather not be there? Well, God has a word for you, but it may not be one you want to hear. It's the same word Jeremiah brought to his people when they were slaves in Babylon, far from everything near and dear: ‘You're not going home anytime soon, so change your attitude, dig in and make the best of it. Buy homes, plant gardens, let your children get married…and in addition, pray for the peace and prosperity of the city where you're living because when it prospers, you will prosper' (Jeremiah 29:5-7, paraphrased). The Israelites were in exile because God had allowed them to be taken captive. So, could it be that you are where you are today because God placed you there to bless those around you? Instead of putting your life on hold waiting for circumstances to change, start sowing into other people's lives what you want to come back as a harvest in your own. Why? Because when they are blessed, you'll be blessed too! How do we know? Because Jesus said, ‘Give, and it will be given to you…the measure you use…will be measured to you' (Luke 6:38 NIV). Martha Washington said, ‘I'm determined to be cheerful and happy in whatever situation I may be. I've learned that the greater part of happiness or misery depends upon our dispositions, and not upon our circumstances.' That sounds just like Paul: ‘I have learned [to be] content in any and every situation' (Philippians 4:12 NIV). If you want to go from surviving to thriving, make the most of where God placed you.

At the graveside of His friend Lazarus, Jesus told his grieving sisters Mary and Martha two all-important things: 1) ‘Your brother will rise again' (John 11:23 NASB 1995 edition). 2) ‘Everyone who lives believing in me does not…die at all. Do you believe this?' (v. 26 MSG). So, what's going to take you beyond death and into your heavenly home? Sterling character? Charitable giving? Going to church? No. While those are all commendable, only by placing your trust in Christ can you have the assurance of resurrection and eternal life. You see, Jesus conquered death and the grave for you. You may be reading these words today fighting tears of sorrow. Perhaps you have lost your spouse of many years, or your child to a tragic accident, or a loved one to some dreaded disease. Like no other, Jesus understands your grief. He is touched with the feelings of our infirmities (see Hebrews 4:15). Or perhaps you sense that death is near to you. If you haven't placed your trust in Christ, you must take care of that right away. Don't wait for a more convenient time. Do it today, and you will be saved; that means that when you breathe your last breath, you will pass from death to life – heavenly life. When you trust in Christ, there is no reason to fear what lies beyond the grave. He is already there. And He has prepared a place for you. It's ready! Inexplicable, unending joy will be yours forever, thanks to Jesus. You can exclaim with Paul, ‘O death, where is thy sting? O grave, where is thy victory?' (1 Corinthians 15:55 KJV). Think about it: immediately following death – glory!

If you have ever seen a child learning to walk, you know that falling down is an important part of the process. Getting back up again is crucial to developing the child's balance and muscle development. Likewise, a boxer isn't disqualified because he gets knocked down; he's disqualified because he doesn't get back up. Boxers know they will go down, so they focus on the art of falling safely and getting up quickly. Children and boxers both learn this: it's all about getting up again. The Bible tells us that falling is common to both the righteous and unrighteous. It's getting up again that sets them apart: ‘If good people fall…they will get back up. But when trouble strikes the wicked, that's the end of them' (v. 16 CEV). The unrighteous stay down – the righteous get up again! In Scripture, some of God's greatest servants fell into personal failure. Abram lied to Pharaoh about his wife, Sarai (see Genesis 12:11-17). Jacob deceived his father and stole his brother's birth-right (see Genesis 27:17-29). In anger, Moses disobeyed God by striking the rock (see Numbers 20:7-12). Yet instead of being disqualified, they ‘were all commended for their faith' (Hebrews 11:39 NIV). How come? Because they acknowledged their sin and received God's forgiveness. In other words, they fell, but they got up again. And when you fall, you can get up again too. That's the ‘faith' part of your journey. Staying down is failure accepted – getting back up is faith activated!

God created us to enjoy unbroken fellowship with Him and each other. That's why Satan's first ploy was to separate us from God – and from each other. Using things like pride, stubbornness, confusion, resentment, and selfishness, he drives wedges and polarises relationships. What starts out as a misunderstanding often ends in angry stand-offs or toxic silences that last for hours, days, and sometimes years. Furthermore, we delude ourselves by thinking it's nobody else's business. The fallout can't be contained. It affects every relationship in our lives – all because we're determined to prove we're right and the other person is wrong. And it's not just a psychological problem; it's a sin problem in need of a divine solution! Here is how God handles polarised relationships. Paul writes, ‘God was reconciling the world to himself in Christ, not counting people's sins against them.' Sin destroyed our relationship with God. Yet He took the initiative by giving Jesus ‘as a ransom [price paid] for many' (Mark 10:45 NIV), in order to reconcile us to Himself. Reconciling means bringing back together what belongs together! Notice this: God doesn't count ‘people's sins against them'. Neither does He trivialise or ignore our sin debt. He cancelled it at the cross and stopped holding it against us. And it didn't end there. He ‘made us agents of…reconciliation' (2 Corinthians 5:19 PHPS) by calling us ‘to settle our relationships with each other' (v. 19 MSG). Sometimes that means eating humble pie, becoming the reconciler, taking the initiative, and ending the stand-off. Are you ready to do that today?

Building a successful relationship calls for focusing on the other person's strengths instead of their weaknesses. Concerning marriage, Benjamin Franklin said, ‘Keep your eyes wide open beforehand and half shut afterwards.' It's a mistake to rush into a lifetime relationship without taking time to get to know the other person. Without due diligence on the front end, you are sure to have problems on the back end. But an important relationship principle lies in learning to forgive and forget. American politician Edward Wallace Hoch is attributed with saying, ‘There is so much good in the worst of us, and so much bad in the best of us, that it hardly behooves any of us, to talk about the rest of us.' Forgetting can be harder when the offence is great. Small offences can usually be forgiven quickly; big ones involve a healing process. But until you decide to forgive and forget, the process can't even start. Paul writes: ‘Be gentle, kind, humble, meek, and patient. Put up with each other…forgive anyone who does you wrong, just as Christ has forgiven you. Love is more important than anything… It is what ties everything…together' (vv. 12-14 CEV). One author puts it this way: ‘If you don't like something, change it. If you can‘t change it, change your attitude. Don't complain.' In other words, when it comes to facing facts you can't change, pray for grace and learn to live with them. Why do we need to forgive and forget? Because God says so! You are not designed to carry the physical and mental stress that comes with harbouring resentment. Added to which, ‘You might be needing forgiveness before the day's out' (Galatians 6:1 MSG).

‘Christ died for our sins, just as the Scriptures said. He was buried, and he was raised from the dead on the third day, just as the Scriptures said. He was seen by Peter and then by the Twelve. After that, he was seen by more than 500 of his followers at one time…Then he was seen by James and later by all the apostles. Last of all…I also saw him' (See 1 Corinthians 15:3-8 NLT). Some of history's greatest intellectuals started as atheists and ended up putting their trust in Christ. Why? They examined the evidence! If Jesus was who He claimed to be, God incarnate, taking upon Himself human form, dying for our sins and rising again, then they knew they had a life-changing decision to make: either accept Him or reject Him. And you must make that same decision. Peter told his listeners on the day of Pentecost: ‘You nailed him to a cross…But God…raised him back to life' (Acts 2:23-24 NLT). They said, ‘What should we do?' Peter replied, ‘Each of you must repent of your sins and turn to God' (Acts 2:37-38 NLT). That day three thousand souls were won to Christ and the church was launched. Bottom line, Jesus died for your sins and rose again to represent you as an advocate before the throne of God. If you are wise you will accept Him as your Lord and Saviour knowing that He will give you an abundant life now, and eternal life in heaven.

In a ‘sting' operation, law enforcement agents set the bad guy up in order to bring him down. That's what God did to Satan at the cross. For three days it seemed as though Satan had won. Then Jesus rose from the dead and turned his plans upside down: ‘He disarmed the spiritual rulers and authorities. He shamed them publicly by his victory over them on the cross' (Colossians 2:15 NLT). The thing Satan feared most, the birth of a church with the power to change the world through the gospel, had come to pass. ‘The rulers of this world have not understood it; if they had, they would not have crucified our glorious Lord' (1 Corinthians 2:8 NLT). Christ's enemies even tried to stop the truth of the resurrection from getting out: ‘They decided to give the soldiers a large bribe…“You must say, ‘Jesus' disciples came during the night while we were sleeping, and they stole his body'”…So the guards accepted the bribe and said what they were told to say' (Matthew 28:12-15 NLT). Normally hatred for a person ends when they die. So why then do some people hate Jesus? Because the resurrection is the ultimate proof that He is Lord! Indeed, you cannot be saved unless you believe in the resurrection: ‘If you confess with your mouth the Lord Jesus and believe in your heart that God has raised Him from the dead, you will be saved. For with the heart one believes unto righteousness, and with the mouth confession is made unto salvation' (Romans 10:9-10 NKJV).

The hymnist Isaac Watts wrote, ‘See from His head, His hands, His feet, sorrow and love flow mingled down. Did e'er such love and sorrow meet, or thorns compose so rich a crown?' Jesus wore a crown of thorns so you could wear a crown of glory. Thorns in Scripture represent sin. In Eden when Adam and Eve disobeyed, God said, ‘The ground will be under a curse…[…it] will produce thorns' (Genesis 3:17-18 CEV). Later He told Israel that unless they purged the land of their enemies, ‘they will be like…thorns in your sides' (Numbers 33:55 NCV). Solomon cautioned: ‘Corrupt people walk a thorny, treacherous road' (Proverbs 22:5 NLT). And Jesus warned, ‘You can detect them by the way they act, just as you can identify a tree by its fruit. You need never confuse grapevines with thorn bushes' (Matthew 7:16 TLB). A well-known author writes: ‘The crown of thorns Jesus wore represented all our sins. As we were caught in the brambles of envy, anger, shame, discouragement, guilt, bitterness, and unforgiveness, so Jesus, who knew no sin, became “an atoning sacrifice for our sins” (1 John 4:10 NIV). Not once did Christ use His supernatural powers for personal comfort. With just a word He could have transformed the hard earth into a soft bed…hurled the spit of His accusers back into their faces…and paralysed the hand of the soldier who braided the thorns. But He didn't. Instead, “He cancelled the record of the charges against us and took it away by nailing it to Christ's cross”' (Colossians 2:14 NLT). And He did it with you in mind. Amazing!

David was ‘on a roll'. He kept winning battle after battle. He had the Midas touch; everything he touched turned to gold! But success can go to your head, and David wasn't exempt. He started wondering, ‘Just how strong are we?' At that point, he conducted a census and discovered he had ‘one million one hundred thousand [fighting] men' (1 Chronicles 21:5 NIV). That could tempt any of us to think, ‘With an army this size, and given our track record of success, who needs to pray for God's help or ask Him for a plan?' That was the point at which God stepped in and judged David, and seventy thousand Israelites died needlessly (see v. 14 NIV). So here is another aspect of leadership you need to be aware of: your mistakes have the potential to hurt others. You're not just accountable to those who are over you; you're responsible for those under you. After all, if your good decisions have the ability to bless and guide people, your bad decisions have the potential to harm them. ‘David said to God, “Was it not I who ordered the fighting men to be counted? I, the shepherd, have sinned and done wrong…let your hand fall on me and my family, but do not let this plague remain on your people”' (v. 17 NIV). God graciously answered David's prayer, and judgment was lifted from Israel. So, you need God's guidance for your own sake, the sake of the people around you, and to give you the grace to accept responsibility when you fail. Don't try to hide your failures, blame others, or run from God. Acknowledge them, grow through them, and go on to become wiser.

Fresh from a major victory over the Philistines, King David made a major mistake. Instead of trusting God for his next battle, he conducted a census designed to measure his military power and determine his chances of winning. As a result, seventy thousand Israelites perished. This story teaches us three very important lessons about leadership responsibility: 1) As a leader, you're Satan's special target. He knows that in order to get to others, he must go through you, so he will use every strategy he has to bring you down. ‘Satan rose up against Israel and incited David to take a census.' The average board of directors would probably have considered it a good idea, but God saw it as an act of arrogance and unbelief. 2) Don't be presumptuous. Don't let your last victory make you overconfident about your next battle. There will never be a time when you don't need God! The fact that God had just granted David a great victory should have made him more, not less, dependent on God. Paul wrote, ‘Not that we are competent in ourselves to claim anything for ourselves, but our competence comes from God. He has made us competent' (2 Corinthians 3:5-6 NIV). 3) Listen to wise counsel. Joab, one of David's generals, warned him he was making a grave mistake. ‘The king's word, however, overruled Joab' (1 Chronicles 21:4 NIV). You may have great gifts, but you don't have all the gifts. Where you have blind spots, others often have 20/20 vision. ‘In the multitude of counsellors there is safety' (Proverbs 11:14 KJV), so listen to the people God put in your life to guide and protect you.

We have exaggerated ideas about our capabilities. We like to think we can do it all. But no matter how disciplined you are or how hard you try, without a ‘sane estimate of your capabilities', you're setting yourself up to fail. John Ortberg says: ‘Willpower is…finite…You don't get separate stockpiles for different areas…That's why a long list of New Year's resolutions is almost certainly doomed…It takes a whole lot of willpower to get on an exercise…programme to lose weight…If you add on the list: get on a budget…keep your office clean, and read Calvin's Institutes every week, you set yourself up for failure…For most of us…our wills get depleted…more quickly than our bodies.' Ortberg suggests these: 1) Schedule your most important tasks for when your willpower is strongest. For many people, that's the morning. One study shows prisoners have a better shot at parole if their case is heard in the morning when the judge has a higher reserve of willpower and is more inclined to take a chance. 2) Spend willpower wisely by not taking on too many tasks at once, even after you have prayed about them. Generally, God works through your will, and He seldom gives you a free pass to disregard the laws of finitude He created. 3) Set goals – but not too many. Lacking a few, we drift, but having an overabundance means we worry about them, accomplish less, and suffer emotionally and physically. 4) Remember that the one act of your will that replenishes willpower instead of depleting it is surrender. God meant for prayer, solitude, worship, and meditation to be done in a way that restores us.

Have you ever said something you wish you could take back? You have, haven't you? Chuck Swindoll writes: ‘We act impulsively and realise, after the fact, how foolish we were…On top of all that, we hurt the ones we love the most. All this stuff caves in on us…and we wonder how anybody could ever love us…especially God. When we start thinking like this, we need to turn our mind to the “one anothers” in the New Testament. Love one another, build up one another, live in peace with one another, confess your sins to one another, speak to one another, admonish one another, comfort one another, pray for one another. “Bear one another's burdens” (Galatians 6:2 NKJV). Imagine two mountain hikers. One…has a…light pack…while the other poor soul…is…loaded down…It could be a long-standing grudge…poisoning his insides…[Or,] a broken relationship with his wife or one of his kids. That pack could be loaded with unpaid bills. The question is, Where can…[he] go to unload? By sitting in church alongside a…couple thousand other folks? Hardly. What he needs…is…a place where there is person-to-person caring and…authentic sharing. Where he will feel free, without embarrassment…to tell his secret or state his struggle; where someone will listen, help him unload, and give him fresh strength. Adult fellowships…are not miniature church services. They are pockets of people who love Christ and believe in helping one another. They don't point fingers or preach or compare. They are your brothers and sisters in Christ…Are you involved in a…fellowship group? If not, consider joining or starting [one].' Once you begin unloading, you will discover how much easier the journey seems.

When Mary Southerland came down with a raging fever, her doctor suspected viral meningitis. ‘How long have you had the solid white coating on your tongue?' he asked. Mary was puzzled. Why did that matter? The doctor continued, ‘The health of the tongue is a very strong indicator of the health of the entire body.' And spiritually speaking, the same principle applies. ‘The mouth speaks the things that are in the heart. Good people have good things in their hearts…so they say good things…evil people have evil in their hearts, so they say evil things' (vv. 34-35 NCV). The problem isn't the tongue itself; it's more serious. The problem lies in your heart, your attitude, your outlook, and your temperament. Southerland continues: ‘The tongue is a spiritual thermometer that reflects the condition of the heart…Words are power tools that can build…encourage…destroy and cause confusion. We have all been hurt and even defeated by words spoken in anger or words rising out of a wounded heart…If my words are boastful, my heart is insecure. If my words are filthy, my heart is impure and if my words are critical, my heart is filled with pride and anger…Solomon said, “A word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in pictures of silver” (Proverbs 25:11 KJV)…The right word, spoken at the right time and in the right way can bring order in the midst of confusion and light on a very dark path. “Good people know the right thing to say” (Proverbs 10:32 NCV). God gives us spiritual “radar” so we can assess a situation and speak the right word for that circumstance. We just need to check the “radar screen” before we speak.'

When you have been hurt, it's easy to put up barriers. But be careful – a protective shell can turn into a ‘heart of stone': resistant, unreceptive, impenetrable even to God. One Christian author writes: ‘The only thing more painful, and with…more serious ramifications than a broken heart, is a frozen one.…Paul warns us [about]…allowing our hearts to harden. “They are darkened in their understanding…separated from the life of God…due to…hardening of their hearts” (Ephesians 4:18 NIV). A soft heart is not weak or naive. To the contrary, wisdom, experience, and faith make for a strong heart, weathered by compassion and seasoned with mercy. A hardened heart is not protected, it's merely encased in injury, and it is painfully obvious to everyone but you…After a weekend that felt like one painful test after another, I called my best friend in tears. “Why won't this end? How strong does God want me to be? I can't take it anymore!” Being a godly woman…she replied, “Perhaps it's the other way around. You have been strong enough. God wants your heart to be soft and open.” I hadn't thought of it that way. In response to heartbreak, betrayal, or shame, it is…easy to develop a heart of stone. We think this will protect us from…more pain. The problem with stone is…it feels nothing – no pain, but no love. It is a trap that feels like self-preservation, but it is actually self-destruction. [God] wants to give you a heart of flesh. With His love you can emerge from a painful season of loss with a heart that is yielding, porous, and ready to receive the gifts He has…for you.'

Like the rest of us, Jesus sometimes got tired (see John 4:6). But He was never stressed out by the job. He was led, but never driven. He knew what needed to be done and the amount of time required to do it, and He picked a team to accomplish it. Three of them – Peter, James, and John – were in His inner circle. It wasn't that He showed favouritism; He just recognised the particular gifts of the people He worked with and what He needed from each of them to get the job done. An important step towards accomplishing something big is knowing the kinds of people you will need. In other words, you need to know who should be on your team. Jesus spent three-and-a-half years training His disciples before delegating responsibility to them. Was He afraid they would make mistakes, outshine Him, or make Him look bad? No, He told them, ‘He who believes in Me, the works that I do he will do also; and greater works than these he will do, because I go to My Father' (John 14:12 NKJV). Jesus was a team player who got things done through others. But even when you break a task down, strategically plan it, and recruit terrific people, you need one more component to succeed: teamwork! Teamwork is the glue that brings people together – and keeps them together. There are more than a billion Christians in the world today. And it all started two thousand years ago with one man who had a vision, a man who recruited and trained a team to fulfil that vision. If you're wise, you will study His work philosophy.

Instead of confining Jesus to church on Sunday, let's study His work philosophy (attitude, values, and beliefs) on how to get things done. The principles He lived by call for these: 1) Being clear about your assignment. He said, ‘I must finish the work…he gave me to do.' Jesus understood that focus maximises skill and opportunity. So if you're talented, energetic, and active and you're still not seeing concrete results, your problem may be lack of focus. When Nehemiah was rebuilding Jerusalem's walls, his enemies said, ‘Come, let us meet together' (Nehemiah 6:2 NKJV). That's when Nehemiah sent back this message: ‘I am doing a great work, so…I cannot come down' (v. 3 NKJV). 2) Prioritising tasks in the order of their importance. When you don't do what has to be done according to its importance, jobs start to arrange themselves according to their urgency. And when that happens, you miss great opportunities. The Bible says Jesus ‘needed to go through Samaria' (John 4:4 NKJV). To the disciples, this probably looked like a diversion because it wasn't the shortest route to where they wanted to go. But there was a woman in Samaria Jesus wanted to redeem; a vessel through which He reached the entire city with the gospel. Bottom line: Jesus was clear about His priorities. Are you? 3) Creating a definitive timetable. In other words, set deadlines and stick with them. Jesus knew He had only three-and-a-half years to get the job done, and He made every day count. One of the biggest lies we tell ourselves is, ‘I'll get to it later.' To succeed in life, let Jesus' work philosophy become your master plan.

The foundation of good leadership is security. Paul told Timothy, ‘God doesn't want us to be shy with his gifts, but bold and loving and sensible.' You must know with certainty that God called you, equipped you, and guaranteed your ultimate success. And you must keep this in mind when people stop liking you, when funding drops, when morale dips, and others reject you. If you feel insecure, fear will eventually cause you to sabotage your own leadership. Confident leaders see what is, while maintaining their vision of what can be. They're rarely content with things the way they are. As President Ronald Reagan once quipped, ‘Status quo…is Latin for “the mess we're in”!' By definition, ‘to lead' is to be out in front, breaking new ground, vanquishing new worlds, and proceeding away from the status quo. Dissatisfaction with the status quo doesn't mean having a bad attitude or complaining; it has to do with a readiness to be different and to take risks. A person who won't risk change is someone who fails to grow. A leader who loves the status quo is someone who soon turns into a follower. Raymond Smith of Bell Atlantic Corporation once remarked, ‘Administrators are easy to find and cheap to keep. Leaders – risk takers – are in very short supply. And the ones with vision are pure gold.' Many people are more comfortable dealing with old troubles than doing what it takes to find new solutions; risk seems dangerous to them. The secret lies in having a winning attitude – one that comes from being secure in who you are and what you have been called to do. Think about it!

Jesus said, ‘You shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free.' It takes courage to face a painful reality. It's easier to bail out of a troubled marriage than to stay and work your way through to a better place. It's easier to give in to despair and self-pity than go back to school and train for a new career. It takes guts to stand up for your convictions when you're under fire. But somebody said, ‘Unless you stand for something, you'll fall for anything.' The truth is, anytime you're willing to stand for something or try something new, somebody will take a shot at you. The English word courage is derived from the French word cœur, meaning ‘heart'. Hence the phrase ‘don't lose heart'. It's easy to be brave when you feel strong, but it's much harder when you feel weak and inadequate. Yet, that's when you need courage the most. General Omar Bradley remarked, ‘Bravery is the capacity to perform properly even when scared half to death.' And the courage he is referring to isn't hollow hype. It has nothing to do with a ‘fake it till you make it' mentality. Courage means saying, ‘If God promised it, I believe it' and moving forward despite the obstacles. If you need an injection of courage today, read and meditate on these verses: 1) ‘Be strong and do not give up…your work will be rewarded' (2 Chronicles 15:7 NIV). 2) ‘Energise the limp hands, strengthen the rubbery knees. Tell fearful souls, “Courage! Take heart! GOD is…on his way…He'll save you!”' (Isaiah 35:3-4 MSG). Now that's courage!

Knowing the battles he would have to fight in order to conquer the promised land, God told Joshua this, no less than three times: ‘Be strong and of good courage.' Anytime you move forward, obstacles will block your path. Count on it! H.G. Wells asked, ‘What on earth would a man do with himself, if something did not stand in his way?' What did he mean? That adversity is your friend – even when it feels like your enemy. Every obstacle you face reveals your strengths and weaknesses. It also shapes you and makes you wiser and more confident. Poet Ralph Waldo Emerson wrote: ‘Whatever you do, you need courage. Whatever course you decide upon, there is always someone to tell you that you are wrong. There are always difficulties arising that tempt you to believe your critics are right. To map out a course of action and follow it to an end requires some of the same courage that a soldier needs. Peace has its victories, but it takes brave men and women to win them.' Anytime you leave your comfort zone and step out in faith to follow God, you will be tested. But you will also reach heights you thought were beyond you and go further than others who had greater talent but settled for the status quo. In The Message paraphrase, Paul tells us: ‘Every detail works to your advantage…So we're not giving up. How could we! Even though on the outside it often looks like things are falling apart on us, on the inside, where God is making new life, not a day goes by without his unfolding grace' (2 Corinthians 4:15-17 MSG). Courage can be defined as simply ‘not giving up'.

If you want to grow roses, you must declare war on weeds; otherwise, they will run amok in your garden. In other words, you must beware of weeds! There is a spiritual parallel at work here, and it's this: unless you deal decisively with sin, it will take over your life. The Message paraphrases Paul's words like this: ‘Our old way of life was nailed to the cross with Christ, a decisive end to that sin-miserable life – no longer captive to sin's demands! What we believe is this: If we get included in Christ's sin-conquering death, we also get included in his life-saving resurrection. We know that when Jesus was raised from the dead it was a signal of the end of death-as-the-end. Never again will death have the last word. When Jesus died, he took sin down with him, but alive he brings God down to us. From now on, think of it this way: Sin speaks a dead language that means nothing to you; God speaks your mother tongue, and you hang on every word. You are dead to sin and alive to God.…That means you must not give sin a vote in the way you conduct your lives. Don't give it the time of day. Don't even run little errands that are connected with that old way of life. Throw yourselves wholeheartedly and full-time – remember, you've been raised from the dead! – into God's way of doing things. Sin can't tell you how to live. After all, you're not living under that old tyranny any longer. You're living in the freedom of God' (vv. 6-14 MSG). So, the word for today is – say no to sin!

Panic and anxiety are often our first reactions to conflict and problems. In those initial moments, choosing peace seems impossible. Your subconscious whispers, ‘If you really care, you will worry.' But a seasoned counsellor writes: ‘Don't panic! No matter what the situation or circumstance, we usually have…a moment to breathe deeply and…let peace flow through our body and mind…Panic, not the task, is the enemy.' Anxiety just empowers and enlarges the problem. Your best problem-solving resource is always peace. Fear and anxiety block solutions; answers flow more easily and naturally from a peaceful state of mind. And God's peace is always available to us – if we choose to use it. Paul writes, ‘When the Holy Spirit controls our lives he will produce…in us…peace.' Refuse to let your negative emotions run amok or decide your response. Jesus said, ‘[Stop allowing yourselves to be agitated and disturbed; and do not permit yourselves to be fearful…intimidated…cowardly and unsettled]' (John 14:27 AMPC). That means you have options; you can choose between peace and inner conflict. In the same verse, Jesus also said, ‘My [own] peace I…bequeath to you' (v. 27 AMPC), and ‘bequeath' relates to executing a will. When someone dies, they leave their most cherished possessions to the people they love. But just because Jesus left us His peace doesn't mean it will automatically operate in us. Plus, when we lose our peace, it's harder to hear from God. When Paul says, ‘Let the peace (soul harmony which comes) from Christ rule…in your hearts' (Colossians 3:15 AMPC), the word ‘rule' means ‘to govern and to control'. So instead of letting yourself get anxious and panicky today, choose peace.

Living by faith is something you learn to do by practising it daily. Before you became a Christian, you trusted in your own ability and intellect. But those things only took you so far and no further, right? Now you're trusting God for the wisdom, guidance, resources, and ability to fulfil His will for your life. The Bible tells us, ‘By faith Noah…prepared an ark for the saving of his household' (Hebrews 11:7 NKJV). Think about it: when Noah built the ark, there was no sign of rain. Living by faith doesn't always make sense. It doesn't mean your problems will vanish into thin air. Sometimes faith changes your circumstances; other times it changes your perspective. How? By giving you the tenacity to hang in there when the cheque doesn't come in the post, or the doctor says the condition is incurable, or your spouse asks for a divorce, or the kids are running amok, or the company where you have worked for the last twenty years closes its doors. Faith gives you the fortitude to endure, confident that God will work things out on your behalf. Paul tells us, ‘Faith is confidence in what we hope for and assurance about what we do not see' (Hebrews 11:1 NIV). Living by faith means 1) obeying God and believing He will never let you down, 2) following in the footsteps of ordinary people who did extraordinary things for God, and 3) using your faith because you know it's the only currency heaven recognises. When the Bible says, ‘The just shall live by faith,' it doesn't mean little, sporadic bursts of faith; it means making faith a lifestyle.