Podcasts about sytsma

The story of how strawberries went from small forage item to one of the world’s most popular fruits – though they're technically not a true fruit – involves lots of crossbreeding experimentation, as you might expect, but also a bit of spy craft. Research: “A Transatlantic Tango: The Story of the Strawberry. Royal Horticultural Society. https://www.rhs.org.uk/advice/grow-your-own/features/history-of-the-strawberry#:~:text=It%20is%20hard%20to%20believe,back%20on%20fortifications%20near%20Concepci%C3%B3n. Allen, Mike. “The 18th-Century Spy Who Gave Us Big Strawberries.” Atlas Obscura. Nov. 16, 2017. https://www.atlasobscura.com/articles/big-strawberries-spy-chile-france Barnes, Monica. “Frezier, Amédée François (1682-1773).” American Museum of Natural History. January 2008. https://www.researchgate.net/publication/280567727_Frezier_Amedee_Francois_1682-1773 Darrow, George M. “The Strawberry: History, Breeding and Physiology.” New York. Holt, Rinehart and Winston. 1966. Accessed online: https://archive.org/details/strawberryhistor00darr/mode/1up The Editors of Encyclopaedia Britannica. "strawberry". Encyclopedia Britannica, 29 Jun. 2023, https://www.britannica.com/plant/strawberry Folta, K.M., Barbey, C.R. “The strawberry genome: a complicated past and promising future.” Hortic Res 6, 97 (2019). https://doi.org/10.1038/s41438-019-0181-z Grubinger, Vern. “History of the Strawberry.” University of Vermont. June 2012. https://www.uvm.edu/vtvegandberry/factsheets/strawberryhistory.html Hancock, J.F. “Strawberries.” Oxford University Press. 2000. Petruzzello, Melissa. "list of plants in the family Rosaceae". Encyclopedia Britannica, 7 Mar. 2024, https://www.britannica.com/topic/list-of-plants-in-the-family-Rosaceae-2001612 Sevilla, Elisa, and Ana Sevilla. “STRAWBERRY.” New World Objects of Knowledge: A Cabinet of Curiosities, edited by Mark Thurner and Juan Pimentel, University of London Press, 2021, pp. 207–12. JSTOR, http://www.jstor.org/stable/j.ctv1vbd275.34 “Strawberry Facts.” University of Florida Gulf Coast Research and Education Center. https://gcrec.ifas.ufl.edu/fruit-crops/strawberries/strawberry-facts/ Sytsma, Kenneth J.. "Rosaceae". Encyclopedia Britannica, 28 Feb. 2025, https://www.britannica.com/plant/Rosaceae See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Special Patreon Re-Release: God, Sex, and Your Marriage: Interview with Dr. Juli Slattery    *DISCLAIMER* This interview includes some adult themes and is not intended for young ears.   **Transcription Below**   Matthew 9:37 (NIV) "Then he said to his disciples, “The harvest is plentiful but the workers are few."   Questions we discuss: For many couples, sex can be a difficult area of marriage and you encourage people that is normal, but you also warn us not to confuse normal with healthy. What is normal for married couples and what is healthy, as it relates to sexual intimacy in marriage? What is God's genius chemical cocktail that we experience during sex? Will you give a brief overview of your four pillars of intimacy?   Dr. Juli Slattery is a clinical psychologist, author, speaker and broadcast media professional with over twenty-five years of experience counseling, and teaching women. She's the president and co-founder of Authentic Intimacy, a unique ministry devoted to teaching God's design for intimacy and sexuality. In 2020, Juli launched SexualDiscipleship.com, a platform designed to help Christian leaders navigate sexual issues and questions with gospel-centered truth. She hosts a weekly podcast, Java with Juli, where she answers tough questions about relationships, marriage, and spiritual, emotional and sexual intimacy.  www.authenticintimacy.com    Other Episodes with Dr. Juli Slattery on The Savvy Sauce:   Passion Pursuit with Dr. Juli Slattery   Patreon 26 Holy Sex with Dr. Juli Slattery   Life-Giving Marriage with Dr. Juli Slattery   Thank You to Our Sponsors: Chick-fil-A East Peoria and The Savvy Sauce Charities (and donate online here)   Connect with The Savvy Sauce on Facebook or Instagram or Our Website   Please help us out by sharing this episode with a friend, leaving a 5-star rating and review, and subscribing to this podcast!   Gospel Scripture: (all NIV)   Romans 3:23 “for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God,”   Romans 3:24 “and are justified freely by his grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus.”   Romans 3:25 (a) “God presented him as a sacrifice of atonement, through faith in his blood.”    Hebrews 9:22 (b) “without the shedding of blood there is no forgiveness.”    Romans 5:8 “But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.”    Romans 5:11 “Not only is this so, but we also rejoice in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have now received reconciliation.”    John 3:16 “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.”   Romans 10:9 “That if you confess with your mouth, “Jesus is Lord,” and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.”    Luke 15:10 says “In the same way, I tell you, there is rejoicing in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner who repents.”   Romans 8:1 “Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus”   Ephesians 1:13–14 “And you also were included in Christ when you heard the word of truth, the gospel of your salvation. Having believed, you were marked in him with a seal, the promised Holy Spirit, who is a deposit guaranteeing our inheritance until the redemption of those who are God's possession- to the praise of his glory.”   Ephesians 1:15–23 “For this reason, ever since I heard about your faith in the Lord Jesus and your love for all the saints, I have not stopped giving thanks for you, remembering you in my prayers. I keep asking that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the glorious Father, may give you the spirit of wisdom and revelation, so that you may know him better. I pray also that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints, and his incomparably great power for us who believe. That power is like the working of his mighty strength, which he exerted in Christ when he raised him from the dead and seated him at his right hand in the heavenly realms, far above all rule and authority, power and dominion, and every title that can be given, not only in the present age but also in the one to come. And God placed all things under his feet and appointed him to be head over everything for the church, which is his body, the fullness of him who fills everything in every way.”   Ephesians 2:8–10 “For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith – and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God – not by works, so that no one can boast. For we are God‘s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.“   Ephesians 2:13 “But now in Christ Jesus you who once were far away have been brought near through the blood of Christ.“   Philippians 1:6 “being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.”   **Transcription**   [00:00:00]   Laura Dugger: Welcome to The Savvy Sauce, where we have practical chats for intentional living. I'm your host Laura Dugger, and I'm so glad you're here.    [00:00:18]   Laura Dugger: Today's message is not intended for little ears. We'll be discussing some adult themes, and I want you to be aware before you listen to this message.   I'm grateful for today's sponsor, Chick-fil-A East Peoria. Check them out online to place your order for dining or catering, or to fill out an application to join their friendly team. Visit cfaeastpeoria.com.   Hey friends, I wanted to share some exciting news with you. Savvy Sauce Charities has officially received our confirmation from the IRS that all donations are tax deductible. I know that we have super generous listeners, so we wanted to let you know you can now mail your check to Savvy Sauce Charities, P.O. Box 101, Roanoke, Illinois, 61561. Thanks in advance for supporting Savvy Sauce Charities. [00:01:24]    And now I'm pleased to share this episode with you that used to only be available to paying patrons. Dr. Juli Slattery is my returning guest today. She has written another fantastic book entitled God, Sex, and Your Marriage. And now she's going to give us a healthy vision for sexual intimacy in marriage and share actionable ways that we can grow in maturity and delight and health in our relationship with our spouse.    Here's our chat.   Welcome back to The Savvy Sauce, Dr. Juli.   Dr Juli Slattery: Oh, thanks so much for having me.   Laura Dugger: Well, even from the get-go on the dedication page of your book, you dedicate it to your brothers and sisters in Christ, some who have labored before you, and some who now work alongside you in reclaiming God's design for sex. You quote the last part of Matthew 9:37, when you say, "The field is ripe for the harvest, but the laborers are few." [00:02:28] Will you elaborate on what you mean by this?   Dr. Juli Slattery: Yeah. I think within the field of Christian sexuality, there are things that we can disagree on. Some of those conversations can be characterized by looking back at what people have written before and being critical of that or looking at the ways that we disagree today on different topics and how we apply the scriptures.    So as I was wrapping up this book, I just have such a heart for unity in the body of Christ and recognize that there are so few people that really want to see God reclaim biblical sexuality, that I just want us to link arms and to work together, to learn from each other, to give honor to each other, and just to be in the trenches, like encouraging one another, instead of focusing on maybe where we differ. [00:03:25]    So that's kind of the heart of it, as well as just a gratitude for the people that have gone before us, the people that were speaking and writing on this topic over the last few decades. Again, I think we're looking back and saying purity culture was horrible and, you know, like just be with more of a critical eye, which we need to learn from the past. But I think, you know, I just really want to have a spirit of graciousness and unity as we say, Hey, we're kind of working off of the shoulders of the people who have been really pioneers in this field.   Laura Dugger: I think that goal of unity is such a worthy one. For so many couples, sex can be a difficult area of marriage. And you write that this is very normal, but you also warn us not to confuse normal with healthy. You go on to write, and I'll just quote it here, "Just consider that the normal American is overweight, overstimulated, exhausted, and lonely." [00:04:29] So, Juli, from your perspective, what is normal for married couples and what is healthy as it relates to sexual intimacy in marriage?   Dr. Juli Slattery: I would say normal is a lot of conflict around sex, frustration, unfulfilled desires, lack of communication. They don't know how to talk about sex or navigate conflict around just differences. I think it's normal for there to be some level of pornography in a marriage. One or both of the individuals bringing in a history of pornography and a struggle with pornography. I think it's normal to have a lot of confusion and shame just around being a sexual person.    So those are all sort of the normal barometer of what I see as I talk to married Christian couples. Again, I think there's peace in knowing, okay, we have good company around us. We're not the only couple struggling with these things, but I also don't want that to be a message that things should just stay the way they are. [00:05:35]    Laura Dugger: I love that. Can you elaborate then on what is healthy?   Dr. Juli Slattery: Yeah. So healthy is sort of the opposite of what I've mentioned. Healthy is that there's healthy, regular communication around sex. So a couple can talk about not just how often they want to have sex, but the deeper issues of what does sex represent for me as an individual? What does it represent for us as a couple? Being able to talk through things from the past, past wounds and shame, and being able to seek the Lord together. It's healthy to honor each other in their sexual relationship, honor the differences that they might be bringing of sexual desire and what they're hoping for in their sexual relationship, navigating together the challenges that they face, but navigating as a team.   So the challenges of we have no energy because we're exhausted with little kids or the challenges of one of us might be working through some trauma from the past, the challenges of how do we address the pornography in our marriage and how do we learn to enjoy each other within our own covenant? [00:06:46]    So those are kind of the markers of a healthy sex life. I don't think there are many couples who would just say automatically, we were there when we first got married. But unfortunately, I think there are also not a lot of couples who would say we're actually working towards those goals. Instead, we have a tendency to just kind of stay stuck where we are.   Laura Dugger: I think an obvious answer would be that communication is going to help us move in that direction of health. But if this healthy vision sounds wonderful, how do people actually engage in this? What are a few of the first steps they can take?   Dr. Juli Slattery: I think one of the first steps is just really broadening your horizon of what God created sex to be. And really, it's taking a step back and asking yourself the question, what do you think a good sex life is actually supposed to look like from a Christian standpoint? [00:07:45]    I think it's fascinating for couples to have that conversation and, first of all, to see where they differ in their understanding of what a good sex life is meant to be, but also where they struggle to flesh it out because there just hasn't been a lot of great teaching on, how do we as a couple even have the same goals related to our sex life.   That was the main reason why I wrote God, Sex, and Your Marriage was to give Christian married couples a vision for what God created sex to be and to have them together agree on, here's what our mature sex life is meant to look like and we want to start working toward that. But if you don't know what you're working toward, then you're just going to stay stuck.   Laura Dugger: I appreciate resources like this. If anybody's listened to any of our other topics on sexual intimacy on The Savvy Sauce, you know that we recommend reading a book, ideally with each other. But even if it's just you reading it yourself, there's so much to glean. [00:08:49] And like you said, Juli, you're casting this vision.   But then even as you read this aloud to one another or you each read a chapter and then come together and discuss, it gets you comfortable talking about this language and it brings up even more questions like you just mentioned that can be natural conversation starters.   Dr. Juli Slattery: Yeah, that's a great suggestion for every married couple, including myself and my husband. I guess something that we've tried to do throughout our marriage is to be reading a book on sex together, preferably, as you mentioned, out loud, because it really does get you comfortable in terms of just what language to use and what it's like to have a conversation around sex.   Laura Dugger: Absolutely. So just really, I've thought this so many times, but thank you for the labor and the work you put into putting this resource together so that we have an option that we can trust.    Dr. Juli Slattery: Yeah, well, I think we tend to write the books that we would want to read. So, yeah, a lot of it has just come out of our own journey. [00:09:49]    Laura Dugger: Well, and I agree with another point that you make in the book when you talk about sex being so important to God and so we can expect it to constantly be under spiritual attack. So will you just tell us more about that idea?   Dr. Juli Slattery: Yeah. I think the average Christian, as you look at the cultural landscape, there's no question that sex is under attack and that we see it distorted and we see it being such a confusing topic for our kids, for just our culture. We can recognize that and we can look at different ways that sex is being used against us in our world today, but we're less likely to see how that's happening within our own marriages.   But I think just being aware of the fact that Satan hates everything God made as beautiful, and sex is such a powerful picture of God's covenant love, of the fact that he created us for intimate unity. That Satan really wants to twist that. And he'll do it any way he can. [00:10:56] He'll do it through shame. He'll do it through us even having a very limited perspective of what sex should be. He'll do it through dividing you and having sex be the main source of conflict in your marriage. He'll do it through pornography and marital affairs and betrayal.    I think we have to be on the lookout and say, hey, this really is a spiritual terrain, not just in the world at large, but it's a spiritual terrain within my own heart and within our marriage.   Laura Dugger: But then you don't leave us there with that message of attack because in that same chapter you conclude with this quote: "God's power to redeem is greater than Satan's power to destroy." So, Juli, how have you seen that practically played out in couples' lives?   Dr. Juli Slattery: Boy, I've just been so blessed to see that played out over and over again. In the ministry that I run, Authentic Intimacy, we've been doing this for a decade now. [00:11:56] I can't explain it, but all I can tell you is that when an individual or a couple begins to really get God's perspective of sexuality, when they alone or together begin to surrender this area of their life to God, you just see change, you see healing, you see redemption, you see freedom where there once was shame and lies.   It's commonplace in our ministry to see that, which is amazing because every life that's redeemed really is a work of God. But the scripture says that His word doesn't return void, but it accomplishes what it's sent out to do. And I get to see that. I get to see that as couples are healing and recovering from betrayal, as people are looking to get set free from pornography, as people are trying to navigate the impact of past trauma and what that's done to their sex life, as couples are confronting some of the anger or bitterness or selfishness that have developed over the years because of their differences and sexual desire. [00:13:03] I've just gotten to see all those sort of things redeemed by God's power, and sex starts to become something that really does unify a husband and wife together.   Laura Dugger: Well, that makes so much sense because I've been convicted so many times and had to be reminded when God will gently call me back to Himself where I've shared a struggle with my husband, or if I'm questioning something in parenting and I'm just thinking on it and ruminating on it, God will gently remind me, come to Me with this, share with Me. And in the same way, with the topic of sex, you're encouraging us in this book to invite God to fight for us, and it's really His strength and power that can heal us in this sacred space.   Dr. Juli Slattery: Yeah. It makes so much sense, Laura. But in reality, I think most of us kind of bar God from our sex lives. We don't realize we do it, but we never praise a married couple about our sex lives.[00:14:07] We never invite God into our shame. We never even think or want to think about the fact that He's present with us in the bedroom because that sort of creeps us out.    But if you're trying to fight a spiritual battle with your own strength and you're barring God's presence from that place, then you're not going to win it. I had to confront this in my own life in marriage many years ago. I didn't realize how much I was doing that, but I think because the church has been so silent on sex over the years, we just naturally have this sort of separate category of sexuality where God doesn't enter. So, boy, what a powerful thing to begin surrendering this to the Lord and asking for His wisdom and His help.   Laura Dugger: Powerful indeed. I remember one wife shared with me they don't pray together about sex out loud, but she has prayed before, even when they're in the act, and just shared real-time, Okay, Lord, I'm having a really hard time experiencing orgasm, and I would love to experience that today, so can you help me get there?" [00:15:16] And she said the results have been incredible. And I just think He cares so much about every detail of our lives that I love that story and what she shared because I think it shows His heart that He wants to share delight with us, and He's created this.   Dr. Juli Slattery: Yeah, it brings God honor and pleasure when a married couple enjoys sex to the fullest because that's what He created it for. I think somehow we've bought this lie that God's embarrassed of our sexuality or it's a necessary evil, instead of it being something that we clearly see in the Song of Solomon and Proverbs chapter 5 and other places in Scripture that God delights in this. He created sex for this purpose.   And part of fighting the spiritual battle that we face in our world is reclaiming the ground of what sex looks like in our marriage. And so there are a lot of people who are frustrated at what's happening to their kids or what's happening to our culture, but at the same time they don't fight for godly sexuality within the space of their own bedroom. [00:16:22] And that really is where the battle begins, is in our own hearts and our own lives.   Laura Dugger: Well, let's now discuss the four pillars of intimacy, and hopefully you can just give a brief overview of each. Beginning with faithfulness and specifically, why do you write that holy jealousy is good?   Dr. Juli Slattery: Yeah. If I can back up just for a minute, the whole premise of this book is that God created sex within marriage to be a form of revelation. Like through marriage and sexuality, the Scripture says God is revealing to us what his covenant love is like. And we see that in the Old Testament in God's covenant relationship with Israel and how often He used language of marriage and sexuality as a metaphor to explain His love for Israel.    Then in the New Testament we see the same thing happen with Jesus' relationship with the church. We see all this bridal language, intimacy language, sexual language to express what covenant looks like between Christ and His bride. [00:17:35] And I know for a lot of people that's sort of a mind shift, but if you can think about it this way, God creates the physical world in order to reveal Himself to us. So God has created marriage and sexuality as a form of revelation to reveal for us this special relationship of covenant.   So what I did with these four pillars of covenant love is say, OK, if God's love, if His covenant love is like this, then this is what defines a healthy sex life. So I broke down these four aspects of God's love for His covenant people and then applied it to sexuality.    So the first pillar that I talk about there is faithfulness. That faithfulness is the very foundation of any covenant. That a covenant isn't a relationship that's based on what feels good or what I feel like doing in the moment. It's a relationship based on your character, on your promise.    Part of that is that within covenant you have a sacred sense of belonging to each other. And so there is a holy jealousy within covenant. [00:18:43] And we see this in God's relationship with Israel where God actually says, My name is jealous. I am jealous for you. I'm a jealous God. And when you worship other gods, I'm angry.    That seems to be true within the covenant of marriage, that sexually we belong to each other exclusively, and there should be a healthy anger, protectiveness, and even jealousy if that exclusivity isn't honored. So, Laura, for example, I was talking to a woman who her marriage was in bad shape. There had been conflict over many years, there had been pornography addiction, and her husband cheated on her. And she said, "I was so dead that I wasn't even angry. My love for him was so dead that I didn't even get mad." [00:19:43] You'd be like, "Why would she not get mad? Is that a sign of health to not get mad when your husband cheats?" No. That's a sign of a very dysfunctional relationship, of a covenant that's dead.    So a healthy marriage means that we fight for each other and we protect our sexual relationship and that if there is a violation, then there is reason to be upset,there is reason to be angry. I think this is so key that we talk about you really can't build anything else in your sex life if you don't have faithfulness. That's the bare minimum foundation.   Laura Dugger: And now a brief message from our sponsors.    [00:20:25]   Sponsor: I want to say thank you to our longtime sponsor, Chick-fil-A East Peoria. I hope that you've already downloaded the Chick-fil-A app. Because did you know that with the app you can skip the line and have food ready for you when you arrive? This is one of my favorite options when I'm taking my four daughters to Chick-fil-A East Peoria. Download the Chick-fil-A app today and start earning points toward free rewards that are fully customized to your preferences and tastes.   Chick-fil-A was named as one of Glassdoor's best places to work in the nation. That's a huge honor. And one team member even wrote, "No comparison. This is a great job for a first job, extra money, or for career advancement. Such a loving environment, great management, and fair pay." Chick-fil-A believes that the local and involved ownership ensures fostering an environment where you are known, challenged, and cared for.   So if you're looking for a wonderful place to work, visit Chick-fil-A East Peoria or fill out an application online today at cfaeastpeoria.com.    [00:21:31]   Laura Dugger: We are so excited to celebrate with you that The Savvy Sauce Charities received our IRS confirmation that all donations are officially tax deductible. We hope that you're going to take action to partner with us.   There are details laid out on our website, which is thesavvysauce.com, and they're going to walk you through the process to donate, and it's also going to share our tax ID number. The donation process is as easy as just filling out a check for Savvy Sauce Charities and mailing it to P.O. Box 101, Roanoke, Illinois, 61561.    If we've contributed to your life in any way by resourcing you to grow closer in intimacy with God and others, would you now contribute to us financially? In this way, we are so excited to partner together and hopefully meet each other's needs. Our team wants to continue producing these podcasts, and we're expectant that if you're listening right now, you value The Savvy Sauce Charities enough to make a donation.    We view this work as ministry, so we happily spend thousands of dollars each year to record and produce these episodes. And our ultimate prayer is that your experience with Savvy Sauce Charities will make an impact for eternity. So if that is true for you, if you've ever received a blessing in any way from this nonprofit, would you prayerfully consider donating to Savvy Sauce Charities? Any amount is greatly appreciated.   And in fact, you've heard me say before, if every listener gave only $1 per month, it would completely offset all our costs. Again, we have all the details listed on our website, thesavvysauce.com, if you are interested in making a donation. We look forward to partnering with you.   [00:23:32]   Laura Dugger: Can you elaborate about the chemical cocktail and why God is so genius in this creation?   Dr. Juli Slattery: Yeah, sure. You know, I think one of the reasons that we really struggle with faithfulness is because we believe at a heart level that marriage is more about attractiveness and getting our sexual needs met than believing that marriage is about covenant. And one of the ways that I explain that is just to show, you know, God has designed new sex and a new relationship to elicit different kinds of chemicals in our brain than a long-term relationship and long-term sexual interaction.   So the new relationship is going to have adrenaline and a neurotransmitter called PEA. And together, adrenaline and PEA make you feel like there's this huge output of dopamine, which is the pleasure hormone of the brain. [00:24:34] And so it makes you feel intoxicated. It makes you feel like you're on a drug.    This is why pornography is so addictive. But God has given that cocktail in the beginning of a relationship, in the beginning of seeing each other naked for the first time, so that it would be a cementing kind of experience for a husband and wife. Unfortunately, our world has really hijacked that with pornography and other sexual offerings. But God's design is that you shouldn't be able to forget your honeymoon. Like it should be like a cementing experience for you.   But then as you're married for a while and you have sex regularly, you don't get that same adrenaline and PEA unless you're doing something kind of fun or new or exciting. But in general, you'll get just kind of output of oxytocin, which is a bonding hormone. It connects you to your spouse. And you also get endorphins, which is sort of a feel-good, all-is-well-with-the-world kind of neurotransmitter. [00:25:39]    And so God has designed a married sex life to have elements of both of these, of new and exciting things, say, for example, on your anniversary or you go away for a vacation and you're really focusing on your sex life, but also to have these bonding and feel-good chemicals to take place just in the normal course of life.    But, Laura, what happens is we get addicted to that new and exciting, and so we kind of begin to neglect the sexual relationship and instead are tempted by what's going to make us immediately feel good in the moment. So that's kind of just understanding how God wired our sexuality and, again, why He's a genius, but also understanding how, if we're not wise, that wiring can be worked against us.   Laura Dugger: That's so helpful to be wise in all of that. Just the incredible amounts that He gives us. You had cited another source that says men can have their oxytocin levels raised more than 500% after orgasm. [00:26:49] That may be why they're able to open up more emotionally after they've connected sexually. You also talk about the bonding agent of vasopressin. Would you like to share anything about that?   Dr. Juli Slattery: Yeah. So the two hormones, oxytocin and vasopressin, kind of go together. Vasopressin is kind of more, from what I understand, like the male form of oxytocin. But these hormones have been shown, as you mentioned, to bond people together, to make a man feel more connected and more likely to be vulnerable.    And interestingly, there's even some studies that show that a man whose body is rich with this oxytocin and vasopressin is less likely to be attracted to another woman. So some people will call it the fidelity hormone.   But when you begin to understand this as a wife, that regular sex with my husband is helping him feel emotionally closer to me, is fostering vulnerability and connection, is helping him to focus on me and me to focus on him, it helps with temptation that comes from the outside. [00:28:02]    And that's not at all to put pressure on a wife to say it's your job to keep your husband faithful. But it is to recognize that God has created sex to be a very powerful experience that is meant to bond you together. And you want to use that for the advantage of your marriage instead of allowing the enemy to use it as something that could tear you apart.   Laura Dugger: That's so good. There's so much there in that first pillar of faithfulness. But for the second pillar of intimate knowing, what separates that intimate knowing from what you call a sanctified hookup?   Dr. Juli Slattery: I think, again, we have to go back to God's covenant love to understand what we're working towards. And if you have been in a covenant relationship with God through Jesus Christ for any amount of time, hopefully you've learned that one of the goals of your relationship with God is to know Him more intimately, to say, Hey, I know God and Jesus more intimately today than I did five years ago. [00:29:07] And through the struggles of life, through the highs and the lows, I've developed intimacy with the Lord.   Jesus talks about this when he talks about, you know, being so intimately connected to Him, it's like a vine in a branch. Like we're in communion all the time. So when we apply that to our sexual relationship, the goal of sex is not just to have our bodies exchange fluids, but it's to be on a journey together of deep knowing of sharing with each other.   Just like in our relationship with God, the valleys, the difficulties, actually are when intimacy can be forged even greater than when things are going well. And I think this is really important because for most married couples, they're going to experience some real challenges in their sex life.   Dr. Juli Slattery: challenges in their sex life and instead of just saying, well, we can't enjoy each other or we have different desires, looking at that as an opportunity of, how do I know my spouse more intimately because of the challenge that we're experiencing? [00:30:12]    When I work with couples who are going through difficulties like infertility or somebody's struggle with pornography or somebody's struggle with healing, what those couples will say is now we're beginning to talk at a deeper level than do you want to have sex or not. Now, we're talking about my shame underneath my sexuality or my frustration that I walked into marriage with these expectations and now I feel like they're not being met. So you're beginning to communicate about your heart, you're beginning to share the sexual journey.   Unfortunately I think there are a lot of married couples who don't see this. All they think of is sex. It's just what our bodies are doing instead of really looking at it as an opportunity to forge intimacy at a much deeper level.   Laura Dugger: The third pillar is sacrificial giving. I'd love for you to share your personal story about God calling you to sacrificial giving. [00:31:15]    Dr. Juli Slattery: Yeah. One of the things that I've shared in my own life is that I'd say for the first 10 or 15 years of marriage, sex was one of those things that I wasn't very interested in, my husband was more interested in and particularly when we had three little boys running around the house, you know, I really avoided sex. I really didn't want to engage with it. I would always look for sort of the opportunity in the evening to say, “Hey, I need to do my devotions. This is my time.”    I remember going through that period of marriage where I would spend time with God usually in the evening and there would be times where it was like the Lord was really asking me, like if you really want to love Me and serve Me, why haven't you surrendered this area of your life to me?   And He began to just really prompt me to look at what it is to say, how do I love my husband sexually? How do I look at the conflict that I have within my own heart around sexuality and really begin to ask the Lord to heal that and to help me to enjoy what He has given me in marriage? [00:32:27] But during that season it was a lot of, how do I lay aside my own agenda and really understand my husband's sexual drive? How do I understand what would please him?    And Laura I just think a lot of us go into marriage and we think the sexual aspect of marriage will be something that won't require anything from us, that we just get to get, we get to receive. And for sure God has designed us to receive sexually, but He's also designed us so that we have to give sexually.   Why would he do that? Like people are like, why is God so cruel to make sex so difficult to navigate? But what God began to show me is He wants me to learn to love as Christ loves. Christ's love for us has always been sacrificial. And our love for Him in covenant is called to be sacrificial. We're called to lay down our own lives and take up the cross and follow Him. [00:33:30]    So I think there's something beautiful when we begin to understand that part of a healthy sex life is both the husband and wife approaching this with the attitude of, how do I serve you? How do I love you well? And when a husband and wife both have that attitude, the level of intimacy and even the level of pleasure has such a greater capacity than when we approach sexuality with just the mindset of what can I get from it.   Laura Dugger: Will you go even a little bit more specific with one of those quiet times with the Lord? What were you praying about? And what did he lead you to do?   Dr. Juli Slattery: So I was praying, you know, Lord, I just really want to know how to love You more and serve You. Like it was a time in my life where the Lord really was calling me deeper. What I just felt the Lord prompting me to do is to initiate sex with my husband.    I remember just kind of arguing with God in that moment, like, this is my time with You. You know, I think sometimes when we spend time with the Lord and we're studying the scripture, He wants us to actually put the Bible down and walk out what He's called us to do in his scripture. [00:34:45] And it was during that season of life again where God was just prompting me.   That night, that evening was the first time just prompting me like, hey, if you want to love Me more, if you want to know what My love is like, then go up and engage with your husband, because he's the one I've given you to love and he's the one I've given to love you. That really started us on a journey that didn't happen immediately, but over years of really surrendering this to God, we've learned what it is to serve each other and love each other well sexually.   Laura Dugger: And I'll just paraphrase from page 108 when that evening you sheepishly shared with your husband, when you came up and kind of surprised him and just said, "I was praying and it was like, God told me to come up here and initiate sex with you." And I love his response. He said, "No way! I was praying, asking God to tell you to do that." [00:35:44]    Dr. Juli Slattery: Yeah, that's a true story. That really happened. So yeah, it's amazing how God works.   Laura Dugger: I love that so much. I want to make sure that you're up to date with our latest news. We have a new website. You can visit TheSavvySauce.com and see all of the latest updates. You may remember Francie Hinrichsen from Episode 132, where we talked about pursuing our God-given dreams. She is the amazing businesswoman who has carefully designed a brand new website for SavvySauce Charities, and we are thrilled with the final product.So I hope you check it out.    There you're going to find all of our podcasts, now with show notes and transcriptions listed, a scrapbook of various previous guests, and an easy place to join our email list to receive monthly encouragement and questions to ask your loved ones, so that you can have your own practical chats for intentional living. [00:36:45]    You will also be able to access our donation button or our mailing address for sending checks that are tax deductible, so that you can support the work of SavvySauce Charities and help us continue to reach the nations with the good news of Jesus Christ. So make sure you visit TheSavvySauce.com.    I just appreciate those personal stories, even how when you were meeting with the Lord, having your quiet time, how He called you to go and seek your husband. There's a part of Matthew 5:23-24, that illustrates this as well. It just says, "Therefore, if you're offering your gift at the altar, and there remember that your brother or sister has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to them. Then come and offer your gift."   I just appreciate how the Lord even values that horizontal relationship first and the restoration there, and then you come back and reconnect vertically as well. [00:37:49]    Dr. Juli Slattery: Boy, it's true. Like that's the living out of our love for a God, for sure. There's also scripture that talks about like, if you say that you love Me, but you're not loving your brother, then your love for me isn't genuine. So I'm paraphrasing there. But you know, the scripture that I think has really gotten me over the years that I don't think many people apply to sexuality, is when Jesus is teaching at the Sermon on the Mount, and He says, even pagans know how to be kind to those who are kind to them. Like even pagans know how to greet those who greet them. But I say to you, love your enemies and do good to those who persecute you.    Not that my husband is my enemy, or was persecuting me, but the attitude of even a pagan wife knows how to love her husband well, when he's doing everything she wants, when he's attractive to her, when he's bringing her flowers, when he's attentive. But it requires the supernatural love of God for us to reach inside of ourselves and love in a way that is sacrificial. [00:39:01]    God wants us to become great lovers. He wants us to learn to love like He loves. And that's not a natural love that the average husband or wife can accomplish on their own strength. It's something that comes through intimacy with God and through saying, Lord, I want to become more like you in every area of my life. And again, our sexual relationship is not excluded from that. It perhaps can be the most challenging and vulnerable aspect of showing us how to love like God loves us.   Laura Dugger: Just one more thing to draw out of your chapter. I appreciated your balance between encouraging us to ask ourselves, are we being a cheerful giver? Then you also quote our mutual friend, Michael Sytsma, who is a pastor and also a certified sex therapist and author and speaker, that he says, the Bible does talk about fasting, but speaks far more about the feasting. [00:40:06]    Dr. Juli Slattery: Dr. Sytsma is just a wealth of wisdom on this topic. I've learned a lot from him. And that really sort of ushers in that fourth pillar of covenant love. So we've covered faithfulness, intimate knowing, sacrificial giving, but the fourth pillar is passionate celebration.    God has designed sex to be a passionate celebration of our covenant with each other. It is the way in our bodies that we remember, and we rejoice together that we've covenanted our lives to one another. God created sex to be pleasurable. He created the climax, He created the dopamine centers in our brain that go off with great delight when we experience sex with each other.    This is an important pillar. If you're looking at your sex life, and you say, okay, we're faithful to each other, and we're building intimate knowing, and I have a servant attitude, but I experienced no pleasure, then something's wrong with your sex life. [00:41:10] That's something that you need to work toward as an individual and as a married couple. There are a lot of Christian women who would identify with that, who would say, yeah, I do this primarily for my husband. I don't really love it. I don't really know how to enjoy it.    I would say to that woman that that's not the fullness of what God has designed for your sex life to look like in a marriage. He may be challenging you as he's challenged me over the years to really work on what does it look like for me to enjoy this gift, not just to be a giver of it, but also to be a receiver of it.   Laura Dugger: If anybody has their book, I'm thinking specifically, there is this part on page 133, where you draw out some fascinating discoveries about passionate celebration even in our relationship with the Lord, what that looks like, but how that transfers to the marriage as well. [00:42:10] Just things that we wouldn't think of: prayer and singing releasing certain bonding hormones.   Dr. Juli Slattery: Yeah. Yeah. So when you think about like our gatherings as a church body on Sundays or whenever you gather, what you're doing is you're gathering as part of the Bride of Christ. Usually we think of our Sunday services about the message. Yeah, the message is an important part, but it's not the most important part of our gathering. Our gathering is to express our love to our Savior and to our husband, to our heavenly Father, to all of it. We're rejoicing in Him. We're worshiping him as a collective group.    And what the research has shown is that when people gather together and they sing together out loud and when they dance, the same kind of chemicals are released in their brain as are released during sex. So they're getting the dopamine, they're getting the endorphins, they're getting the oxytocin. [00:43:15]    So when God's people get together and sing together and worship the Lord together, they're actually getting that same bonding hormone that unites you as the family of God, as a husband and wife would get together as they celebrate their covenant. So it's been really cool for me to study and to see these parallels of what God designed His relationship with us to be like, and then also what He designed marriage to be like. And to see that in many ways, even our bodily and neurological response will mirror each other.   Laura Dugger: It's just incredible to learn more about those relationships. Juli, as we seek to apply this conversation now to our own lives, what's an example of a possible next step forward?   Dr. Juli Slattery: Yeah, I think, Laura, a lot of us as married Christians, we think about biblical sexuality in terms of morality. In other words, let's keep the rules, let's obey God. And as we talked about in the faithfulness pillar, that certainly is a very critical part of how we honor God and each other within our sexual relationship. [00:44:30]    But the other pillars are all about maturity. I think you can be married for 10 years, 15 years, 20 years, 30 years or more as a married couple and never considered, what does it look like for us to mature in our sexual love? How can we say five years from now that we love each other more deeply sexually than we than we do right now? What do we need to work on? Which of these four pillars requires our immediate attention?    The book God, Sex, and Your Marriage can be helpful. We also are releasing a video curriculum and workbook for couples to go through this material that can be really helpful that you could do as couples or do in a small group. But things don't change unless we become intentional about changing them.    And so, you know, I think for all of us, we need that challenge to not just settle for the way things are, but to really ask the Lord to begin redeeming sex within our marriage, again, as part of that larger spiritual battle of reclaiming God's design for sex within our world. [00:45:42]    Laura Dugger: If part of this plan of ours for intentionality includes learning more from you, where can we go to do that?   Dr. Juli Slattery: You can find everything that we do at AuthenticIntimacy.com. So there's a podcast, blog, this book and other books and workbooks and small group opportunities. So you can find all of that at our website, Authentic Intimacy dot com.   Laura Dugger: Wonderful. We will link to that, as always, in the show notes for today's episode. Juli, you have been on multiple times, so you know we are called The Savvy Sauce because "savvy" is synonymous with practical knowledge. And so is my final question for you today. What is your savvy sauce? [00:46:26]    Dr. Juli Slattery: Well, I would have to go back and listen to the episodes I've been on before to see if I say the same one all the time. But my savvy sauce is just really spending time with the Lord and really trying to make sure I reserve that first hour of the day for connection with Him, for surrendering to Him, learning from Him, just wanting to do what he calls me to do. So that's my savvy sauce right there.   Laura Dugger: Well, you are always a calm and steady and helpful guest. As we opened this discussion, we talked about that passage from Matthew 9:37, where Jesus is saying the field is ripe for the harvest, but the laborers are few. So I just want to say thank you for being a willing and skilled helper. I'm so grateful to get to have you as my returning guest.   Dr. Juli Slattery: Oh, Laura, thank you. Thanks for giving me a chance to share. It's always a joy to talk to you. [00:47:31]    Laura Dugger: Likewise.    One more thing before you go. Have you heard the term "gospel" before? It simply means good news. And I want to share the best news with you. But it starts with the bad news. Every single one of us were born sinners, but Christ desires to rescue us from our sin, which is something we cannot do for ourselves.   This means there is absolutely no chance we can make it to heaven on our own. So, for you and for me, it means we deserve death and we can never pay back the sacrifice we owe to be saved. We need a Savior.   But God loved us so much, He made a way for His only Son to willingly die in our place as the perfect substitute. This gives us hope of life forever in right relationship with Him. That is good news.   Jesus lived the perfect life we could never live and died in our place for our sin. [00:48:31] This was God's plan to make a way to reconcile with us so that God can look at us and see Jesus. We can be covered and justified through the work Jesus finished if we choose to receive what He has done for us.   Romans 10:9 says that if you confess with your mouth Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised Him from the dead, you will be saved.    So would you pray with me now? Heavenly Father, thank You for sending Jesus to take our place. I pray someone today right now is touched and chooses to turn their life over to You. Will You clearly guide them and help them take their next step in faith to declare You as Lord of their life? We trust You to work and change lives now for eternity. In Jesus' name we pray. Amen.    If you prayed that prayer, you are declaring Him for me, so me for Him. You get the opportunity to live your life for Him. [00:49:31] And at this podcast, we're called The Savvy Sauce for a reason. We want to give you practical tools to implement the knowledge you have learned. So you ready to get started?    First, tell someone. Say it out loud. Get a Bible. The first day I made this decision, my parents took me to Barnes & Noble and let me choose my own Bible. I selected the Quest NIV Bible, and I love it. You can start by reading the Book of John.    Also, get connected locally, which just means tell someone who's a part of a church in your community that you made a decision to follow Christ. I'm assuming they will be thrilled to talk with you about further steps, such as going to church and getting connected to other believers to encourage you.    We want to celebrate with you too, so feel free to leave a comment for us here if you did make a decision to follow Christ. We also have show notes included where you can read Scripture that describes this process.    Finally, be encouraged. Luke 15:10 says, "In the same way, I tell you, there is rejoicing in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner who repents." [00:50:36] The heavens are praising with you for your decision today.    If you've already received this good news, I pray that you have someone else to share it with today. You are loved and I look forward to meeting you here next time.

KGMI's Dianna Hawryluk talks to Gary Sytsma about Wednesday's Polar Bear Plunge in Birch Bay.

We are taking the month of December to highlight the top podcasts since the beginning of our podcast journey. Today our CFL team sits down with ordained minister, licensed professional counselor rectified sex therapist, professor, and national speaker Dr. Michael Sytsma. Dr. Sytsma has over 30 years of clinical experience in sex therapy and he founded Building Intimate Marriages, Inc. He is also co-founder of Sexual Wholeness, Inc. and co-author of the book we are discussing today, “Secrets of Sex & Marriage: 8 Surprises that make all the difference. Part 2

We are taking the month of December to highlight the top podcasts since the beginning of our podcast journey. Today our CFL team sits down with ordained minister, licensed professional counselor rectified sex therapist, professor, and national speaker Dr. Michael Sytsma. Dr. Sytsma has over 30 years of clinical experience in sex therapy and he founded Building Intimate Marriages, Inc. He is also co-founder of Sexual Wholeness, Inc. and co-author of the book we are discussing today, “Secrets of Sex & Marriage: 8 Surprises that make all the difference.

Most Christians who are active in church have been in this situation before. You've just listened to a compelling presentation about a need in some far-away corner of the world. Or perhaps it was a television program, or a commercial on your favorite Christian radio station. The need seems so great, and the story tugs at your heart strings. I've never heard of this organization before, but maybe it's the Holy Spirit prompting me to give. What should I do? Hello, everyone, I'm Warren Smith, the president of MinistryWatch. And I think it is biblical to test the spirits, to make sure that the spirit moving you is actually the Holy Spirit. That's why an article I saw in Christianity Today magazine by my guest today, Anthony Sytsma, caught my attention. It's called “God Calls Me To Give. But to Everyone?” He has some guidance for us on how to test whether that tug we are feeling is actually from God…or from some clever advertising executives. Anthony Sytsma is himself a missionary, so he's not trying to discourage giving. In fact, he believes, as do I, that when we have confidence in our giving decisions, we'll actually give more. If you'd like to read his article in Christianity Today, click here. The producer for today's program is Jeff McIntosh. Until next time, may God bless you.

Life as a Rocket Scientist Get an inside look into the career of Dr. Joni Sytsma, an aerospace engineer and CTO of Australia's iLAuNCH program. With experience in the U.S. Air Force and cutting-edge hypersonics research, Dr. Sytsma manages a $180 million space program and drives innovation in Australia's aerospace sector. Tune in for the following + Much MORE:

The iLAuNCH trailblazer is a partnership between academic institutions and more than 20 industry partners that aims to accelerate the development of the space manufacturing sector. This week, we're joined by Dr Joni Sytsma, the chief technology officer overseeing iLAuNCH at the University of Southern Queensland.  Sytsma trained at the University of Florida over 20 years ago and has had an amazing career as an aerospace engineer, with spells working at high-profile companies such as Gilmour Space Technologies and Department 13. Here, Sytsma discusses the best recent iLAuNCH projects, including a Fitbit-style wearable for astronauts and a plan to film blast-offs in Australia. 

Join and Support us on Substack: https://themessyreformation.com/  Check out the Abide Project:  https://www.abideproject.org We love the Christian Reformed Church; we want to see reformation in our denomination; and we recognize that reformation is typically messy. So, we're having conversations with pastors throughout the CRC about what reformation might look like. Intro Music by Matt Krotzer 

Join and Support us on Substack: https://themessyreformation.com/  Check out the Abide Project:  https://www.abideproject.org We love the Christian Reformed Church; we want to see reformation in our denomination; and we recognize that reformation is typically messy. So, we're having conversations with pastors throughout the CRC about what reformation might look like. Intro Music by Matt Krotzer 

I am the mother of many things: plant babies, doggos, and multiple podcasts. I've also birthed several businesses and quite a few artistic endeavors. But I'm not mama to any little humans. So, when Rachael Sytsma-Ramos, Psy.D, suggested an episode focusing on the dynamics of practice ownership and parenting, I was instantly intrigued.  Rachael is mama to two children under five (!!), the founder of Relational Psychology Group, where she also manages a full caseload of 22-24 clients per week beyond typical ownership duties like marketing, bill paying, and supervising.  GUEST BIO Rachael Sytsma-Ramos (she/her) is a Clinical Psychologist in the Chicagoland area and mom of 2. Her primary clinical specialties are working with queer and transgender/gender-diverse clients, polyamorous/ethical non-monogamy relationships, and neurodivergent clients. Sprinkle in women's issues, intimate partner violence, and sexual abuse survivors and that's her typical clientele. She practices from a feminist-relational lens and is hell-bent on dismantling systems of oppression with her clients. SUPPORT THE SHOW Conversations With a Wounded Healer Merch Join our Patreon for gifts & perks Shop our Bookshop.org store and support local booksellers Share a rating & review on Apple Podcasts *** Let's be friends! You can find us in the following places… Sarah's Website: www.headheartbiztherapy.com/podcast Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/HeadHeartBizTherapy/ Instagram: @headheartbiztherapy Anne's Website: www.spareroomwellness.com Instagram: @spareroomwellness

Alan Sytsma is a longtime observer of the New York City dining scene who is behind New York magazine's formidable food coverage. On this episode we dig into Alan's take on the current NYC restaurant scene and hear about New York mag's amazing “Who Ate Where” issue, which digs into the cultural history of eating out in New York City. It's really fun talking restaurants with Alan, and I hope you enjoy this conversation.Do you enjoy This Is TASTE? Drop us a review on Apple, or star us on Spotify. We'd love to hear from you. MORE FROM ALAN SYTSMA:Who Ate Where [NY Mag]48 Scenes From a Century of New York Dining [NY Mag]See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

The Innovative Launch, Automation, Novel Materials, Communications, and Hypersonics Hub (iLAuNCH) program is a collaboration of regionally based institutions, led by the University of Southern Queensland with The Australian National University, and the University of South Australia. On this edition of The Ex Terra Podcast, Tom Patton talks with Dr. Joni Sytsma, Chief Technology Officer of iLAuNCH. The effort is part of the Australian Government's Trailblazer Universities Program delivered by the Department of Education. Through this program, the Australian Government will build new research capabilities, driving commercialization outcomes and investing in new industry engagement opportunities. "I like to think I'm building the science fiction future," Dr. Sytsma said. "And my science fiction future has space cities, and space travel as an everyday thing." A total of $370.3 million will be invested from 2022–2026 to build additional capacity to focus on the problems that matter to the nation by driving research excellence and real-world impact. Six Australian universities will become leaders in research commercialisation, with dedicated investment in priority areas. Each Trailblazer university will receive $50 million, which will be matched by university and industry partner contributions.

Dr. Michael Sytsma is a licensed professional counselor, certified sex therapist, ordained minister, professor, and national speaker. With over 30 years of clinical experience and an expert leader in sex therapy, he founded Building Intimate Marriages, Inc. and co-founded Sexual Wholeness, Inc. Learn more at: intimatemarriage.org. Dr. Mike's latest book Secrets of Sex and Marriage: 8 Surprises That Make All the Difference was co-written with Shaunti Feldhahn and is available on Amazon and everywhere books are sold. Find out more at: https://secretsofsexandmarriage.com/ You can follow Dr. Mike on social media: @drsytsma

Dr. Michael Sytsma is a licensed professional counselor, certified sex therapist, ordained minister, professor, and national speaker. With over 30 years of clinical experience and an expert leader in sex therapy, he founded Building Intimate Marriages, Inc. and co-founded Sexual Wholeness, Inc. Learn more at: intimatemarriage.org. Dr. Mike's latest book Secrets of Sex and Marriage: 8 Surprises That Make All the Difference was co-written with Shaunti Feldhahn and is available on Amazon and everywhere books are sold. Find out more at: https://secretsofsexandmarriage.com/ You can follow Dr. Mike on social media: @drsytsma

*DISCLAIMER* This episode is intended for adults   Secrets of Sex and Marriage: An Interview with Dr. Michael Sytsma   Micah 6:8 (NIV) "He has shown you, O mortal, what is good. And what does the Lord require of you? To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God."   Questions and Topics We Cover: Will you share a few practical sexual education tips with us? What are the best ways spouses can practice communicating well about sex and what are the potential benefits? How does "desire tend to work differently for men and women"?   Dr. Michael Sytsma is a certified sex therapist, ordained minister, and co-founder of sexual wholeness.  Dr. Mike has been working with couples in a variety of capacities since 1987. He currently works with Building Intimate Marriages in Atlanta, GA as he meets with clients, teaches, and speaks at various conferences. He and Karen have been married since 1985 and have two sons, Josiah and Caleb, and one daughter-in-law.   Secrets of Sex and Marriage Website   Building Intimate Marriages Website   Previous Episodes with Dr. Mike: Ten Common Questions About Sex, Shared Through a Biblical Worldview with Dr. Michael Sytsma   Enjoying a God-Honoring, Healthy Sex Life with Your Spouse with Certified Sex Therapist and Ordained Minister, Dr. Michael Sytsma   Desire Discrepancy in Marriage with Dr. Michael Sytsma   Patreon 29 Remaining Sexually Engaged Through The Years with Dr. Michael Sytsma   Thank You to Our Sponsor: Leman Property Management Company   Connect with The Savvy Sauce on Facebook or Instagram or Our Website   Donate to Savvy Sauce Charities here!   Please help us out by sharing this episode with a friend, leaving a 5-star rating and review, and subscribing to this podcast!   Gospel Scripture: (all NIV)   Romans 3:23 “for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God,”   Romans 3:24 “and are justified freely by his grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus.”   Romans 3:25 (a) “God presented him as a sacrifice of atonement, through faith in his blood.”    Hebrews 9:22 (b) “without the shedding of blood there is no forgiveness.”    Romans 5:8 “But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.”    Romans 5:11 “Not only is this so, but we also rejoice in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have now received reconciliation.”    John 3:16 “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.”   Romans 10:9 “That if you confess with your mouth, “Jesus is Lord,” and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.”    Luke 15:10 says “In the same way, I tell you, there is rejoicing in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner who repents.”   Romans 8:1 “Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus”   Ephesians 1:13–14 “And you also were included in Christ when you heard the word of truth, the gospel of your salvation. Having believed, you were marked in him with a seal, the promised Holy Spirit, who is a deposit guaranteeing our inheritance until the redemption of those who are God's possession- to the praise of his glory.”   Ephesians 1:15–23 “For this reason, ever since I heard about your faith in the Lord Jesus and your love for all the saints, I have not stopped giving thanks for you, remembering you in my prayers. I keep asking that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the glorious Father, may give you the spirit of wisdom and revelation, so that you may know him better. I pray also that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints, and his incomparably great power for us who believe. That power is like the working of his mighty strength, which he exerted in Christ when he raised him from the dead and seated him at his right hand in the heavenly realms, far above all rule and authority, power and dominion, and every title that can be given, not only in the present age but also in the one to come. And God placed all things under his feet and appointed him to be head over everything for the church, which is his body, the fullness of him who fills everything in every way.”   Ephesians 2:8–10 “For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith – and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God – not by works, so that no one can boast. For we are God‘s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.“   Ephesians 2:13 “But now in Christ Jesus you who once were far away have been brought near through the blood of Christ.“   Philippians 1:6 “being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.”

Michael Sytsma has nearly 20 years of leadership experience in the banking industry, as well as many leadership roles in non-profits. Join me today as we discuss servant leadership, what Michael has learned through the years, and about a ministry he is involved in and very passionate about. Michael's LinkedIn Christophe's Children website KeyBank Support the showBe sure to rate and follow our podcast!

Joni attempts to launch a rocket while discreetly transitioning; or she attempts to discreetly transition while launching a rocket.Dr Joni Sytsma is an aerospace engineer who began her career at the United States Air Force Research Laboratory before moving to Australia to join the Hypersonic International Flight Research Experiment program with Defence Science and Technology group. Today, Dr Sytsma is the Chief Technology Officer of the Innovative Launch, Automation, Novel Materials, Communications and Hypersonics program, a collaboration between Universities and Industry to develop Australia's sovereign space capability.Queerstories an award-winning LGBTQI+ storytelling project directed by Maeve Marsden, with regular events around Australia. For more information, visit www.queerstories.com.au and follow Queerstories on Facebook.The Queerstories book is published by Hachette Australia, and can be purchased from your favourite independent bookseller or on Booktopia.To support Queerstories, become a patron at www.patreon.com/ladysingsitbetter Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This episode is for anyone interested in investing in their sexual relationship from an early stage to set the foundation for a fulfilling and intimate connection in the future. My wife and I are beginning our fifth decade in life. We had a discussion the other night about what kind of sex life we want to have in our 50s, 60s, 70s, and 80s and beyond! Having a long term vision for your sex life will bring up things that are important to address. For example, you might find it difficult to find sex pleasurable, have some hang-ups around sex that you want to overcome, or you might have a tendency to withdraw emotionally when you feel rejected, or it might be time to finally address the underlying causes of premature ejaculation. Today's guest is Dr. Michael Sytsma, a licensed sex therapist and evangelical pastor. Michael is the author of an excellent book called The Secrets of Sex and Marriage. I absolutely loved his insights about the importance of exploring sensuality and pleasure in various aspects of life, not just sexual experiences. In this episode you'll hear us talk about the role of mindfulness and being present in one's body, as well as the significance of connecting arousal with emotional intimacy and connection within the relationship. We'll emphasize that a healthy and fulfilling sex life requires a holistic approach that considers spiritual, emotional, physical, and relational aspects.  Most of all, we'll talk about being seductive to our spouse, and what that means. And sometimes building a great sex life requires grieving the things you're not going to be getting.   For more great content like this, check out the following resources: Next Level!: https://getyourmarriageon.com/next-level/ Couples Retreat (Dallas/Ft Worth area): https://getyourmarriageon.com/couples-retreat-dfw/ Website: getyourmarriageon.com Instagram: @getyourmarriageon Fun and Sexy app for couples: Intimately Us

"He said at 74, I am having the best sex of my life. At 74, my penis only occasionally shows up for the party. But I am still having the best sex of my life. I wish I had known in my thirties how to have this kind of sex."What is sex ultimately about? How can married couples enjoy sex more? How do you deal with differences in sexual desire? In this episode, Dr. Michael Sytsma offers a robust theology of sexuality AND clinical wisdom on how to unlock arousal, increase intimacy, and have fun in the bedroom.Dr. Michael Sytsma is a licensed professional counselor, certified sex therapist, ordained minister, professor, and national speaker. He has over 30 years of clinical experience in sex therapy and is the founder of Building Intimate Marriages, Inc. and co-founder of Sexual Wholeness, Inc.Buy Mike's new book: Secrets of Sex & Marriage: 8 Surprises that Make all the Difference (this is a paid link).Learn more at secretsofsexandmarriage.com***Join HMA this week only @ joinhma.com!*** Take the Husband Material Journey... Step 1: Listen to this podcast or watch on YouTube Step 2: Join the private Husband Material Community Step 3: Take the free mini-course: How To Outgrow Porn Step 4: Try the all-in-one program: Husband Material Academy (open this week only) Thanks for listening!

Dr Michael Sytsma joins me again as we dive into the idea of how there is something much deeper going on during sex. There is a higher view to take. Learn more about Dr Sytsma here - https://intimatemarriage.org/bim-team/mike-sytsma/ On the Xtended Version ... I continue the conversation with Michael about Dr Schnarch's idea of eyes-open-sex. Enjoy the show! Sponsors ... Manscaped: Get 20% off and free shipping on the worlds best grooming products for men. Use the code Passion at https://manscaped.com Covenant Spice: Your safe place for Christians to find ways to spice up their sex life. Use our code radio and get a free gift with every purchase at https://covenantspice.com Join Relay: Learn more about the pornography recovery group program Chandler created, the Relay app: bit.ly/passionately-married-relay The post A Higher View | Dr Michael Sytsma #627 first appeared on Sexy Marriage Radio.

Dr Michael Sytsma joins me again as we dive into the idea of how there is something much deeper going on during sex. There is a higher view to take. Learn more about Dr Sytsma here - https://intimatemarriage.org/bim-team/mike-sytsma/ On the Xtended Version ... I continue the conversation with Michael about Dr Schnarch's idea of eyes-open-sex. Enjoy the show! Sponsors ... Manscaped: Get 20% off and free shipping on the worlds best grooming products for men. Use the code Passion at https://manscaped.com Covenant Spice: Your safe place for Christians to find ways to spice up their sex life. Use our code radio and get a free gift with every purchase at https://covenantspice.com Join Relay: Learn more about the pornography recovery group program Chandler created, the Relay app: bit.ly/passionately-married-relay

Today we talk with Shaunti Feldhahn and Dr. Sytsma about their new book, Secrets of Sex & Marriage. LINKS: https://secretsofsexandmarriage.com/ Power Couple Summit with Larry Hagner: https://powercouplesummit2023.com https://anatomyofus.com/ https://www.patreon.com/m/anatomyofus High-Performance Coaching: https://anatomyofus.com/coaching Power Couple Planner: https://anatomyofus.com/power-couple-planner Back to Basics Bootcamp Course: https://anatomyofus.com/backtobasics Interested in Women's Group Coaching? Apply Now: https://anatomyofus.com/womens-group-coaching Join Seth's Badass Husband Mastermind: badasshusband.com Download the Clearing Structure in the Resources section at https://www.anatomyofus.com/ To find a virtual counselor visit http://betterhelp.com/us Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Dr. Mike is back to talk about his new book Secrets of Sex & Marriage that he co-wrote with marriage research expert Shaunti Feldhan.   Dr. Michael Sytsma is a licensed professional counselor, certified sex therapist, ordained minister, professor, and national speaker. With a pastoral heart, a gift in teaching, and a passion for helping couples grow in marriage, Dr. Systma uses his skills to teach couples important truths about marriage in a fun and interesting way, helping them to grow into healthier, transformative relationships with their spouses. He has over 30 years of clinical experience in sex therapy and is the founder of Building Intimate Marriages, Inc. and co-founder of Sexual Wholeness, Inc. He is coauthor of Secrets of Sex & Marriage: 8 Surprises that Make all the Difference, with Shaunti Feldhahn and contributor to several other works. Learn more about Dr. Sytsma by visiting https://intimatemarriage.org/bim-team/mike-sytsma/ Looking for more episodes on Affair Recovery?  Here are additional conversations, including more with Dr. Mike. Looking for more episodes on marriage enrichment?  Check out this page for more.

Sex and marriage Part 2. That’s coming up on this edition of Building Relationships with Dr. Gary Chapman. Last week, Shaunti Feldhahn revealed some groundbreaking research with married couples. This week, counselor and sex therapist, Dr. Michael Sytsma talks about how to overcome sexual struggles in marriage. Don’t miss this Building Relationships with Dr. Gary Chapman. Featured resource: Secrets of Sex and Marriage: 8 Surprises That Make All the DifferenceSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Sex is one of the most common marriage issues (for example, nearly 80% of couples are mismatched in how often they want it), but it doesn't have to be that way. Listen in as we continue our talk with Dr. Michael Sytsma!

Host Bob St.Pierre is joined by John Laux, PF & QF's habitat protection program manager, and Eric Sytsma, PF & QF's habitat protection development officer, for a conversation about creating public lands through the organization's Build a Wildlife Area program. Since its first land acquisition in 1986, PF & QF have created more than 220,000 acres of permanently protected and publicly accessible upland wildlife habitat. The Build a Wildlife Area program is one of the organization's signature tools helping grow that acre total even larger. Episode Highlights: • Laux explains the variety of ways PF & QF work with federal and state agencies to permanently protect critical habitat and create public access. Agencies interested in discussing a land acquisition with PF & QF should connect with Laux at jlaux@pheasantsforever.org. • Sytsma adds to the discussion with his knowledge around the role chapters, donors, and corporate partners play in helping fund permanent protection. Donors interested in learning more about land gifts should connect with Sytsma at esytsma@pheasantsforever.org. • All told, the organization averages a 14-to-1 match for leveraging donor contribution toward a land acquisition. In fact, acquisitions in the state of Minnesota even reach a match averaging 40-to-1. BIRD DOGS FOR HABITAT and BUILD A WILDLIFE AREA Bird Dogs for Habitat is an online popularity contest with a purpose. From April 1st through 30th we're challenging people to cast a vote and make a donation on behalf of their favorite bird dog breed. Every dollar donated equals one vote and every donation will help create more permanently protected and publicly accessible places for our bird dogs to roam via our Build a Wildlife Area program. Head to www.birddogsforhabitat.org to vote! And thanks to our partners at Orvis, Purina Pro Plan, SportDOG BRAND, Ruff Land Kennels, and North American Versatile Hunting Dog Association.

We've started a series on sexual wholeness and today we are going to continue our conversation about Secrets of Sex & Marriage: 8 Surprises That Make All The Difference. If you missed last week, make sure you check out our initial interview with Shaunti Feldhahn. Today, in our conversation with Dr. Michael Sytsma we dive deeper into the practical reality of the data and how it can inform, and maybe transform, our thinking and our attitudes about sex and our spouses. Warning, when you talk with a sex therapist, nothing is off the table! Our guest unpacks the myths and the misunderstandings around our sex lives, even debunking one of the most widely held beliefs about sex. You'll have to tune in to hear what he says!   We hope these conversations will bring some healthy doses of biblical, clinical and relational truth your way as we talk about all things sex. Dr. Michael Sytsma is an ordained minister, licensed professional counselor, certified sex therapist, professor, and national speaker. With over 30 years of clinical experience in sex therapy, he founded Building Intimate Marriages, Inc. and co-founded Sexual Wholeness, Inc. He just co-authored the book, Secrets of Sex & Marriage, with Shaunti Feldhahn (who was featured in last week's episode, #175).   To connect with Dr. Sytsma, visit: Book Website - https://secretsofsexandmarriage.com/ Twitter - https://twitter.com/drsytsma Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/buildingintimatemarriages/ Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/intimatemarriage/ Website -  https://intimatemarriage.org/   ========================   If you've got kids, join us for the Perfectly Imperfect parenting conference, Every Parent Wants to Know, hosted by Christian Parenting. We (Jeff & Terra Mattson) will be sharing  biblical and clinical wisdom as we answer the question, "How do we help our children develop healthy sexuality?". This online conference launches on April 14, but you can watch and rewatch all the videos through the end of 2023. Get your tickets here: https://www.perfectlyimperfect.org/a/2147529418/DJui8Bf6   We LOVE that you have decided to join us this week for the Living Wholehearted Podcast. We hope you enjoyed the conversation, tips, and resources to help you transform every relationship that matters most to you. If you think this will help someone you know, make sure you send it their way or share on socials. Tag us @living_wholehearted and @terramattson! Don't forget to FOLLOW/SUBSCRIBE so you don't miss an episode and help spread the word by leaving us some stars on a review. Thanks for partnering with us to help more leaders, just like you, who want to live and lead with integrity at home, work and in the community.  You can always subscribe to our monthly newsletters at livingwholehearted.com. And, if you are a girl mom, check out mycourageousgirls.com.   Until next time, be the leader you would follow!   Grateful for you, Jeff & Terra   To connect with Jeff & Terra Mattson and Living Wholehearted, go to:   INSTAGRAM @TerraMattson @Living_Wholehearted @MyCourageousGirls   FACEBOOK @WeAreLivingWholehearted @MyCourageousGirls   WEBSITES LivingWholehearted.com TerraMattson.com  MyCourageousGirls.com   RESOURCES Shrinking the Integrity Gap        https://davidccook.org/shrinking-integrity-gap-book/       https://a.co/d/dRiP4Ii Shrinking the Integrity Gap e-Course        https://www.livingwholeheartedstore.com/e-courses Courageous: Being Daughters Rooted in Grace       https://mycourageousgirls.com/shop/p/book-courageous-being-daughters-rooted-in-grace Dear Mattsons        https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLdPzQ_cUwCbRc-MQ40KL3a6ze06CiY38l Helping Moms Raise Confident Daughters        http://cpguides.org  

Today our CFL team sits down with ordained minister, licensed professional counselor, certified sex therapist, professor, and national speaker Dr. Michael Sytsma. Dr. Sytsma has over 30 years of clinical experience in sex therapy and he founded Building Intimate Marriages, Inc. He is also co-founder of Sexual Wholeness, Inc. and co-author of the book we are discussing today, "Secrets of Sex & Marriage: 8 Surprises That Make All the Difference.

Sexual intimacy is more deeply connected to emotional and spiritual intimacy than most of us realize. Maybe you've wondered why you don't talk with your spouse about sexual intimacy? Maybe you feel like the years are full of too much hurt. Maybe you're a newlywed and want to build health in this area. Wherever you are today, we hope the conversation with our guest will be a catalyst to more wholeness in your sex life. Whether you're pastoring or counseling couples, engaged or newly married and ready to get your sex life off to a great start, or you've been married for decades, this episode will bring some helpful insights for you and those you lead.    Over the next two episodes we are speaking with Shaunti Feldhahn and Dr. Michael Systma about their latest book, Secrets of Sex & Marriage: 8 Surprises That Make All The Difference. This is the first episode in our series on sexual wholeness and we just had to bring Dr. Sytsma and Shaunti on the podcast to share the latest research. They each view this topic through a unique lens and we think you will not only be encouraged and resourced in what healthy sexuality can look like, but you might find a starting point for a journey toward health and wholeness in this area of your life.    Today we have the privilege of speaking with Shaunti Feldhahn. You might know Shaunti from her research on relationships and her many many books such as; For Men Only, For Women Only, or The Surprising Secrets of Highly Happy Marriages. Shaunti Feldhahn is a bestselling author, social researcher, speaker, and podcaster. With a graduate degree from Harvard, Shaunti uses her analytical background to help relationships thrive. She and her husband, Jeff, have co-authored groundbreaking relationship books with nearly 3 million copies sold. As a popular media commentator, Shaunti's findings are regularly featured in both secular and faith-based media, including The TODAY Show, FamilyLife Radio, Focus on the Family, The New York Times and Cosmopolitan.   To connect with Shaunti Feldhahn, visit: Book website - https://secretsofsexandmarriage.com/   Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/shauntifeldhahn/ Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/ShauntiFeldhahnOfficial Website - https://shaunti.com/about-shaunti/   ========================   If you've got kids, join us for the Perfectly Imperfect parenting conference, Every Parent Wants to Know, hosted by Christian Parenting. We (Jeff & Terra Mattson) will be sharing  biblical and clinical wisdom as we answer the question, "How do we help our children develop healthy sexuality?". This online conference launches on April 14, but you can watch and rewatch all the videos through the end of 2023. Get your tickets here: https://www.perfectlyimperfect.org/a/2147529418/DJui8Bf6   We LOVE that you have decided to join us this week for the Living Wholehearted Podcast. We hope you enjoyed the conversation, tips, and resources to help you transform every relationship that matters most to you. If you think this will help someone you know, make sure you send it their way or share on socials. Tag us @living_wholehearted and @terramattson! Don't forget to FOLLOW/SUBSCRIBE so you don't miss an episode and help spread the word by leaving us some stars on a review. Thanks for partnering with us to help more leaders, just like you, who want to live and lead with integrity at home, work and in the community.  You can always subscribe to our monthly newsletters at livingwholehearted.com. And, if you are a girl mom, check out mycourageousgirls.com.   Until next time, be the leader you would follow!   Grateful for you, Jeff & Terra   To connect with Jeff & Terra Mattson and Living Wholehearted, go to:   INSTAGRAM @TerraMattson @Living_Wholehearted @MyCourageousGirls   FACEBOOK @WeAreLivingWholehearted @MyCourageousGirls   WEBSITES LivingWholehearted.com TerraMattson.com  MyCourageousGirls.com   RESOURCES Shrinking the Integrity Gap        https://davidccook.org/shrinking-integrity-gap-book/       https://a.co/d/dRiP4Ii   Shrinking the Integrity Gap e-Course        https://www.livingwholeheartedstore.com/e-courses Courageous: Being Daughters Rooted in Grace       https://mycourageousgirls.com/shop/p/book-courageous-being-daughters-rooted-in-grace Dear Mattsons        https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLdPzQ_cUwCbRc-MQ40KL3a6ze06CiY38l Helping Moms Raise Confident Daughters        http://cpguides.org  

Episode 306 - 8 Surprises that make all the difference - A book - Secrets of Sex & Marriage by Feldhahn & Sytsma (2023)   YouTube video Link:       https://youtu.be/_p_nDhrWpSs     Purchase this book on Amazon at: https://amzn.to/3K3hk3a    

Last week we discovered the overall heart-cry of many couples today. We've learned that we are not alone in our struggle, and that there is more opportunity to engage in intimacy than we give credit to! This week, we have the co-author of "Secrets of Sex and Marriage" Dr. Michael Sytsma detailing the many ways we can engage with our spouse that produces a deeper knowing of each other's soul - which results in a better sex life! Take the next 30 minutes and invest in your relationship and marriage! Book - https://secretsofsexandmarriage.com/ ABOUT DR. MICHAEL SYTSMA: Dr. Michael Sytsma has been working with couples in a variety of capacities since 1987. He is a licensed professional counselor in the state of Georgia, a Certified Sex Therapist and a Certified Professional Counseling Supervisor. He is also an ordained minister with The Wesleyan Church and has served as a staff pastor for churches with attendance from 30 to over 1000. He is currently appointed to Building Intimate Marriages, Inc. by The Wesleyan Church where he provides marriage and sex therapy and training to other professionals. Michael also cofounded Sexual Wholeness, Inc., a Christian non-profit dedicated to training, equipping, and certifying professionals in human sexuality. Michael has been married to his wife Karen since 1985. They have two sons and a daughter- in-law, Josiah, Caleb and Dinah. To learn more about Dr. Michael Sytsma, visit his website: https://intimatemarriage.org/bim-team/mike-sytsma/.   Follow Dr. Shannan Crawford: https://drshannancrawford.com/ https://crawfordclinics.com/ 

Today I'm joined by Shaunti Feldhahn and Dr Michael Sytsma as we talk through their new book, Secrets of Sex and Marriage. Based on their latest research with couples, what surprised them most? What do married couples need to know about how things actually play out in marriage? And what should married couples do about our differences and similarities? Learn more about them and their work here - https://secretsofsexandmarriage.com/ Enjoy the show! Sponsors ... HoneyLove: Get 20% OFF @honeylove + Free Shipping with our promo code Passion at https://www.honeylove.com/passion #honeylovepod The post Secrets of Sex and Marriage | Shaunti Feldhahn and Dr. Michael Sytsma #616 first appeared on Sexy Marriage Radio.

Today I'm joined by Shaunti Feldhahn and Dr Michael Sytsma as we talk through their new book, Secrets of Sex and Marriage. Based on their latest research with couples, what surprised them most? What do married couples need to know about how things actually play out in marriage? And what should married couples do about our differences and similarities? Learn more about them and their work here - https://secretsofsexandmarriage.com/ Enjoy the show! Sponsors ... HoneyLove: Get 20% OFF @honeylove + Free Shipping with our promo code Passion at https://www.honeylove.com/passion #honeylovepod

Dr. Michael Sytsma is a licensed professional counselor and certified sex therapist.  He earned a Ph.D. from the University of Georgia in Marriage and Family Therapy, and his dissertation topic was "Sexual Desire Discrepancy in Married Couples".  Dr. Sytsma has over 30 years of clinical experience in sex therapy and founded Building Intimate Marriages, Inc. and co-founded Sexual Wholeness, Inc. Dr. Sytsma is the co-author of a new book, along with Shaunti Feldhahn, entitled "Secrets of Sex & Marriage - 8 Surprises That Make All the Difference". In the research for this book Dr. Sytsma and Shaunti Feldhahn did the largest nationally representative survey ever conducted with married couples about sex.  This research, entitled "The Marriage Intimacy Project" (MIP) was conducted over the span of three years, involving a large research team, professional survery companies and several partner organiazatons to gather, analyze and organize input from more than 5,300 individuals using anonymous surveys and interviews. Through this research the authors identified eight simple, transformational factors to help move couples from disconnection to delight.  This book reveals the most importat sex-related issues for the average couple - offering workable solutions and lasting hope.  The book is not a "sex manual:, but it is a fascinating and practical field guide that will help couples more intimately understand one anohter and create the marriage they've always wanted. Please note - Tony interviewd Shaunt Feldhahm in episodes 108 & 109 of The Power of Purity Podcast is you'd like to check it out! Visit intimatemarriage.org

Dr. Michael Sytsma is a licensed professional counselor and certified sex therapist.  He earned a Ph.D. from the University of Georgia in Marriage and Family Therapy, and his dissertation topic was "Sexual Desire Discrepancy in Married Couples".  Dr. Sytsma has over 30 years of clinical experience in sex therapy and founded Building Intimate Marriages, Inc. and co-founded Sexual Wholeness, Inc. Dr. Sytsma is the co-author of a new book, along with Shaunti Feldhahn, entitled "Secrets of Sex & Marriage - 8 Surprises That Make All the Difference". In the research for this book Dr. Sytsma and Shaunti Feldhahn did the largest nationally representative survey ever conducted with married couples about sex.  This research, entitled "The Marriage Intimacy Project" (MIP) was conducted over the span of three years, involving a large research team, professional survery companies and several partner organiazatons to gather, analyze and organize input from more than 5,300 individuals using anonymous surveys and interviews. Through this research the authors identified eight simple, transformational factors to help move couples from disconnection to delight.  This book reveals the most importat sex-related issues for the average couple - offering workable solutions and lasting hope.  The book is not a "sex manual:, but it is a fascinating and practical field guide that will help couples more intimately understand one anohter and create the marriage they've always wanted. Please note - Tony interviewd Shaunt Feldhahm in episodes 108 & 109 of The Power of Purity Podcast is you'd like to check it out! Visit intimatemarriage.org

Are you sexually "mismatched" in marriage? Do you feel like your in "drive" all the time while your spouse is in neutral (or even putting on the brakes)? Here's good news: You're likely closer than you think. Sex therapist Dr. Michael Sytsma and analyst Shaunti Feldhahn share about two types of desire, "receptive desire" and "initiating desire," and how to build a bridge between to the two. Guests: Shaunti Feldhahn & Dr. Michael Systma Show notes: Secrets of Sex and Marriage: 8 Surprises That Make All the Difference by Shaunti Feldhahn & Dr. Michael Sytsma* Dr. Sytsma's practice: Building Intimate Marriages Join Juli for Second Cup *Affiliate link. AI may earn fees.

Lots of people claim to know about what makes sex and marriage the BEST it can be, but Dr. Michael Sytsma and Shaunti Feldhahn have done one the LARGEST research studies to determine the REAL secrets of relational success! Join Shannon & Dr. Sytsma as they discuss their monumental research project and their NEW BOOK that promises to be a game-changer!

In this episode, we'll visit with Shaunti Feldhahn and Dr. Michael Sytsma, authors of the new book Secrets of Sex & Marriage about:The surprising statistics that were found in conducting research for the book.How pornography impacts the satisfaction people have with their marriage and sex.How couples work through the impact of porn to find the intimacy they desire.Advice for church leaders in using the findings of this book in their ministry.More Information/Resources:Book website: https://secretsofsexandmarriage.comShaunti's website: http://shaunti.com/Dr. Mike's website: http://intimatemarriage.org/Follow on Social Media:Shaunti:Instagram: @shauntifeldhahnFacebook: @ShauntiFeldhahnOfficialDr. Michael Sytsma:Twitter: @drsytsmaInstagram: @buildingintimatemarriagesFacebook: @IntimateMarriageCovenant Eyes offers a clear path to freedom through trusted relationships and free resources. TRY COVENANT EYES FREE FOR 30 DAYS: (Promo Code: FreePodcast) Stay up to date on the latest news and guests on The Covenant Eyes Podcast by signing up for our newsletter: https://learn.covenanteyes.com/podcast-newsletter/ Accountability, Christian, Church, Covenant Eyes, Dr. Michael Sytsma, Freedom from Porn, How to Quit Porn, Intimacy, Marriage, Ministry Leader, Pastor, Porn, Porn Addiction, Pornography, Porn Addiction Recovery, Quit Porn, Secrets of Sex and Marriage, Shaunti FeldhahnTry Covenant Eyes for FREE today!Use Promo Code: FreePodcast

When we were early in our marriage, I often said to Mark, “Sex! I could go the rest of my life without it!” And he totally believed me. True story! Needless to say, we had all kinds of challenges in that area of our marriage, and eventually, we sought out sex therapy. And it was a game-changer for us!It's no secret that sex is an important part of any marriage, but we are often hard-pressed to talk about it honestly with one another. It can be hard to find Christian resources to dig into this somewhat taboo topic, and yet it is one of the areas that can drastically impact your marriage for the better!Today, we are talking about how to get a different perspective on sex. Helping us do that is Shaunti Feldhahn and Dr. Michael Sytsma. They are the authors of a new book called Secrets of Sex & Marriage: 8 Surprises That Make All the Difference. Shaunti is a bestselling author, social researcher, speaker, and has a graduate degree from Harvard. She uses her analytical background to help relationships thrive. And Dr. Michael Sytsma is an ordained minister, licensed professional counselor, Certified Sex Therapist, professor, and national speaker.In this episode, you'll hear:How they collected information about sex and marriagesThe two primary ways desire worksWhat the true gatekeeper to having more sex isAnd more!I pray this is exactly what you are needing to hear today!Show Notes: https://jillsavage.org/feldhahn-sytsma-131

Check out Anthony's podcast: https://africanpastor.podbean.com/    Support us on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/themessyreformation?fan_landing=true   Check out our website: https://themessyreformation.jasonruis.com   Check out the Abide Project:  https://www.abideproject.org   We love the Christian Reformed Church; we want to see reformation in our denomination; and we recognize that reformation is typically messy. So, we're having conversations with pastors throughout the CRC about what reformation might look like.   Intro Music by Matt Krotzer

If you're in a relationship and you value a sex life that is exciting and enduring, hear what our expert Dr. Michael Sytsma, experienced sex therapist and marriage researcher, has to say. His high-quality research findings are so encouraging for couples who look forward to a vibrant sex life for decades! Openness and honesty about physical intimacy plays a vital role. Did you know that there are different and equally legitimate types of sexual desire? The issues in your sex life that are frustrating you may be more resolvable than you think. Discover how and why with Dr. Mike, back with us for the third time to explain the results of his research from the book he co-authored, Secrets of Sex and Marriage.

What’s normal in bed? Researcher Shaunti Feldhahn and sex therapist Dr. Michael Systma offer tips for better, fulfilling, and connected married sex. Show Notes and Resources One-year to Get Closer to Your Partner: A 500 hour journey to get closer to your partner. Listen to Shaunti Feldhahn & Dr. Michael Sytsma podcast, Married with Benefits. Find resources from this podcast at shop.familylife.com. See resources from our past podcasts. Find more content and resources on the FamilyLife's app! Help others find FamilyLife. Leave a review on Apple Podcast or Spotify. Check out all the FamilyLife podcasts on the FamilyLife Podcast Network

The most frequent question that brings people to our website is, "How can I make my spouse want more sex?" Research from The Intimacy Project gives some very encouraging and practical answers that will help you do just that. Dr. Carol talks with Dr. Michael Sytsma, ordained minister, licensed professional counselor, certified sex therapist, and professor about his 30 years as a sex therapist and the fascinating results of his research on married sex. You're certain to discover some ways to make your married sex life much better and more satisfying. Connect with Dr. Sytsma on his website, Facebook, Twitter, or Instagram. Find the book by Dr. Sytsma and Shaunti Feldhein Secrets of Sex and Marriage: 8 Surprises That Make all the Difference, and related resources Check out these articles on our website: - 9 Possible Reasons Your Spouse Doesn't Want to Sleep with You - Having the Sex Talk With Your Spouse If you need individualized help, check out Dr. Carol's Coaching services

Check out Anthony's podcast: https://africanpastor.podbean.com/   Support us on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/themessyreformation?fan_landing=true   Check out our website: https://themessyreformation.jasonruis.com   Check out the Abide Project:  https://www.abideproject.org   We love the Christian Reformed Church; we want to see reformation in our denomination; and we recognize that reformation is typically messy. So, we're having conversations with pastors throughout the CRC about what reformation might look like.   Intro Music by Matt Krotzer

Most stores don't invite passersby to walk up to their shop, open a door, and help themselves—no obligation, no purchase required. But not long after opening new new yarn store in the Mt. Airy neighborhood of Philadelphia, Liz Sytsma hung a box on the side of the store labeled "Little Free Fiber Library." Inspired by the give a book, take a book model of the Little Free Library, Wild Hand wanted to create a place where anyone who wanted or needed yarn could obtain it freely. Instead of viewing the fiber library as competing with the shop's sales, the Wild Hand team views it as an opportunity to bring new crafters into the fold, make yarn accessible to all, and participate in their community. Liz left the nonprofit world to open Wild Hand in 2019, wanting to build a a yarn store that would promote the kind of community she wanted to see: inclusive, diverse, thoughtful, kind. She gathered a team to work together as managers, teaching artists, and colleagues who share a dedication to building the kind of yarn shop where everyone who comes through the door can feel welcome and valued. One of the first projects of Wild Hand was the Community Commitment, a list of 11 principles that guide everything from purchasing decisions to customer service. One of Liz's first collaborators was Theresa Hill, a spinner, teacher, independent dyer, and nurse. Theresa serves as one of the managers of Wild Hand, where she enjoys feeding the creativity and skills of the shop's customers. She appreciates the way Wild Hand encourages customers and staff members alike to be fully themselves in the space, free to be silly, make mistakes, and feel welcome. In addition to a storefront in Philadelphia, Wild Hand has included an online store since early days, too. When COVID-19 closed the shop's physical doors and the operation shifted entirely online for a time, the Community Commitment kept right up: Liz prioritized accessibility on the website, too, and even the Little Free Fiber Library is available to online customers (who cover the cost of shipping). Although neighborhood roots are important, Wild Hand invites everyone to be part of their fiber community. This episode is brought to you by: Handweaving.net (https://handweaving.net/) is the comprehensive weaving website with more than 75,000 historic and modern weaving drafts, documents, and powerful digital tools that put creativity in your hands. Now it's simple to design, color, update, and save your drafts. Our mission is to preserve the rich heritage of hand weaving and pass it down to you. Visit Handweaving.net and sign up for a subscription today! You'll find the largest variety of silk spinning fibers, silk yarn and silk threads & ribbons at TreenwaySilks.com (https://www.treenwaysilks.com/). Choose from a rainbow of hand-dyed colors. Love natural? Their array of wild silk and silk-blends provide choices beyond white. Treenway Silks—where superior quality and customer service are guaranteed. Links: Wild Hand website (https://wild-hand.com/) Ewe-Nited States of Fiber (https://www.ewe-nitedstatesoffiber.com/)

We've finally reached the best time of the year – opening day! Host Bob St.Pierre is joined by Renee Tomala, PF's regional representative for North Dakota; Matt Morlock, PF's state coordinator for South Dakota & North Dakota; and Eric Sytsma, PF & QF's regional representative for Iowa; to provide opening weekend forecasts from three big pheasant hunting destinations. The conversation also includes tips for opening weekend success and highlights PF's banquet calendar of events being held in conjunction with opening weekend celebrations. Episode Highlights: • North Dakota's season opened last weekend, so Tomala provides the first in-field report for 2022. Spoiler Alert: she talks about how hunting this year's lush habitat SLOWLY is a key ingredient to success. • Morlock reports on this weekend's upcoming “traditional” pheasant hunting opener for South Dakota and why this year looks to be the best in a decade for the nation's “Pheasant Capital.” • Sytsma rounds out the conversation highlighting the upland hunting prospects for Iowa that includes pheasants, quail, and Huns. Find a calendar of all PF & QF chapter banquets and events at www.PheasantsForeverEvents.org

Dr. Mike Sytsma joins us to answer your questions about sex and motherhood. Dr. Mike is a Licensed Professional Counselor in the state of Georgia, a Certified Sex Therapist, and a Certified Sexual Addictions Specialist. He is also an ordained minister who is passionate about marriage and helping couples grow in their marriage! We are so glad he is here to provide expert level advice and answers to your questions.  Learn more about the Survive Retreat for Moms of Teens Take a second to tell us what you love about BOAW! Intimate Marriage - Dr. Mike's online couples group IntimateMarriage.Org - Dr. Mike's organization Winshape Marriage retreats  Parenting Together study with Karen and Greg Stubbs