The Forgotten Podcast

The child welfare system can be confusing and complex. Families are often expected to navigate administrative systems, the criminal justice system, the legal system, and the social system—all at the same time and with no prior instruction.  Our guest today knows the child welfare system inside and out—and she's passionate about helping families navigate it with hope and clarity. She also understands that its challenges don't impact everyone equally. Her work focuses on uncovering why families of color often face worse outcomes and unpacking the systemic issues behind those disparities. Shanelle Dupree is a former child welfare administrator who has practiced child welfare law. She is currently the executive director of Racial Equity Collaborative, a nonprofit focused on advancing racial equity for families and communities through collaborative action. In this episode, Shanelle shares the correlation between child welfare outcomes and race, why it's crucial for parents to have the uncomfortable conversations about race with their foster or adoptive children, how to advocate for your child when they encounter racial discrimination, and much more. Find resources mentioned and more in the show notes for this episode: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/shanelle-dupree-272/ 

Note: In this episode, Jami talks about her pregnancy—but don't worry, you didn't miss another baby announcement! If you're part of our TFI family, you know her sweet little one has already arrived. This episode was recorded back in January! Sometimes, it can feel like the conversation within the foster care community is predominantly shaped by female voices. While it's wonderful to have such a strong female perspective in this space, it can be a challenge for men to find resources that speak to their unique experiences.  This is the heartbeat behind the Foster Fathers podcast. Hosts Chris Easley and Kyle Seick are striving to create a community where men can learn and grow from one another within the context of foster care.  Chris and Kyle met during virtual foster care training classes in Boise, Idaho. They quickly bonded over shared humor and mutual support as they embarked on their foster care journeys. Together they offer valuable advice, encouragement, and connection to other foster and adoptive fathers who are navigating the joys and struggles that come with this calling. In this episode, you'll hear what inspired Chris and Kyle to become foster fathers, an honest take on some of the challenges of foster care and adoption, common misconceptions about the men and women who become foster parents, and much more. Find resources mentioned and more in the show notes for this episode: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/foster-fathers-271/

There are many requirements that a biological parent must meet in order to reunify with their children. While these requirements are necessary to ensure that children are being reunited with parents who can provide a safe and stable environment, many parents struggle to overcome the circumstances that led to their children being placed in foster care in the first place. In the state of Illinois, the reunification rate was just 20% in 2021. Just as children and foster parents need a supportive community, biological parents working toward reunification need a strong, steady network around them too. One such parent is Jacob Jackson. After a car accident, Jacob found himself addicted to prescription drugs, which led him into a tumultuous season of life. When he was at the end of his rope, Jacob attempted to take his own life. With nowhere else to turn, he entered the Louisiana Adult & Teen Challenge and by the grace of God found a connection with a local church.  It was during this time that Jacob learned his children had entered foster care. Determined to reunite with them, he threw himself into recovery, working tirelessly to complete the program and meet every requirement needed to regain full custody. In this episode, you'll hear the obstacles Jacob had to overcome, the ways that anyone can fall into difficult circumstances, how the support of the local church played a vital role in reunification, and much more. Find resources mentioned and more in the show notes for this episode: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/jacob-jackson-270/

Foster care is both rewarding and challenging. It's happy at times and sad at others; it brings hard days as well as beautiful moments. If you are in the foster care community, you've likely seen (or experienced) this firsthand. But what do we do when we come to the end of ourselves? How do we respond when we feel called to open our homes again to those in need—yet find ourselves unsure if our hearts are ready to face the joys and the pain that foster care can bring? Our guest for this episode knows this tension well. Sarah Hott's journey through fostering, adopting, and parenting has taught her profound lessons about faith, community, and the power of love. Sarah and her husband, Chris, have been foster parents for over six years. They currently have five children in their home—three by adoption from foster care, one biological, and one foster child. Sarah believes that few things draw you to the heart of Jesus like opening your home and heart to children in need and their families. In this episode, you'll hear more of Sarah's personal journey as she shifted from foster parent to adoptive mom, her thoughts on the power and necessity of a supportive community, the ways God showed up when she was at her maximum capacity, and much more. Find resources mentioned and more in the show notes for this episode: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/sarah-hott-269/

Substance use is a major factor in foster care cases; in 2017 alone, more than half of the children who entered care under age 5 did so because of parental drug use. Addiction is an issue that runs parallel to the foster care community, and it's a struggle that agency workers and foster parents often witness firsthand in the lives of the families they serve. For those of us who have never battled with addiction, it can be easy to think we have nothing in common with parents whose substance use results in their children being removed from their care. However, my guest today is here to help us see these people through a new lens—one that emphasizes compassion, understanding, and shared humanity. Christina Dent is the Founder and Vice President of Mission at End It For Good, a nonprofit that invites people to support approaches to drug addiction that prioritize life, preserve families, and promote public safety. As an adoptive mom and former foster mom, Christina's experiences in foster care ignited a passion in her for finding better solutions for addiction. In this episode, she shares the realities of addiction and drug use, how drug addiction intersects with foster care, why we should reframe the way we think and speak about those struggling with addiction, and much more. Find resources mentioned and more in the show notes for this episode: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/christina-dent-268/

Trigger Warning: We want to let our listeners know that this episode includes mentions of physical abuse. If you are sensitive to this topic, we recommend you listen with caution. Trauma is one of the hardest challenges to navigate in life. Whether it's impacting you or someone you love, it can be easy to wish that trauma could be erased in an instant. But our latest guest's powerful story reminds us that healing doesn't happen with the snap of a finger. It takes the steady presence of others, the patience to water seeds we can't yet see growing, and the courage to keep seeking God—even in the darkest moments. After fifteen years of abuse and a childhood riddled with trauma, Austin Ludwig ended up in the foster care system until he aged out at 18. As he wrestled with the broken pieces of his past, he encountered the transformational love of Jesus and the opportunity for healing and restoration through the Gospel. Today, Austin is a musical artist, writer and speaker who serves on staff with the WinShape Foundation. In this episode, he shares about the brokenness in his childhood as well as the hidden beauty, why every person has an opportunity to respond to the trauma they have experienced, encouragement for foster parents who may currently have a tumultuous relationship with a child in their care, and much more! Find resources mentioned and more in the show notes for this episode: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/austin-ludwig-267/  

The child welfare system is not perfect. Not only is it subject to the types of challenges all government programs can face—such as a lack of funding, policy gaps, and inefficiencies—it's also very overloaded. As a result, many biological parents don't receive the best resources to help them navigate their circumstances, and often, they are confused about how to access the resources that are available. Here at The Forgotten Initiative, we're committed to advocating for the best interests of children and families while ensuring that the laws and procedures designed to protect them are upheld. This is exactly what Esther Sherrard, a dedicated private consultant, works to do every day! Esther helps agencies, courts, and faith communities improve child welfare outcomes by preserving, restoring, and growing families. She was a licensed foster parent for older youth and has spent 10 years with the Federal Child and Family Services Review team. Esther is determined to see more children and families involved in the child welfare system experience positive outcomes. In this episode, Esther shares some of the challenges biological parents face when trying to navigate the system, the importance of the local church standing in the gap to support children and families in foster care, why we should seek to show true compassion to biological parents, and much more. This conversation was grounding and inspiring as we seek to fulfill God's calling to promote justice and support families. Find resources mentioned and more in the show notes for this episode: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/esther-sherrard-266/

Like so many families, Eric and Diana Powell entered into adoption with the best intentions. After their first international adoption from Thailand, they quickly started the paperwork for their second, knowing that the process is often long and fraught with delays. What they couldn't know is that the next few years of their adoption journey would include physical aggression, episodes of emotional dysregulation, marriage tension, a phenomenon known as “blocked care”, and an overwhelming sense of isolation. During this challenging period, they often didn't know where to turn next or what to do to help their family heal and connect. Blocked care is a response that can occur when a person rejects your attempts to provide for them, no matter how loving or compassionate those attempts may be. Over time, this pattern can lead to feelings of rejection, hostility, anxiety, and even compassion fatigue in the caregiver. Eric and Diana's story has been one of incredible challenges, but it is also one of tremendous growth. Today, the Powells are passionate about being a listening ear for others on their fostering or adoption journey. In this episode, they explain how they learned what blocked care is and how to navigate it, the importance of finding a supportive community as a foster or adoptive parent, where to find hope when reality doesn't match your expectations, and much more. Find resources mentioned and more in the show notes for this episode: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/eric-diana-powell-265/

Foster care caseworkers often feel forgotten, isolated, and alone. From managing stressful workloads to coping with secondary trauma and sometimes facing frustration from families in crisis, it's not hard to understand why caseworker turnover is so high. But here at The Forgotten Initiative, we believe well-supported caseworkers will more effectively serve children, leading to better outcomes for everyone.⁠ Our guest for this episode is here to give us an inside look at the kinds of struggles caseworkers may be experiencing in your community and how both individuals and churches can come together to give these professionals a network of support. Brittni Hodges is currently a social worker at Delavan Schools in the same community where she grew up. However, she began her career as a foster care caseworker in Central Illinois. During her time in this role, Brittni worked tirelessly to support children, biological families, and foster families within the complex demands of the foster care system. Despite heavy caseloads, limited resources, and challenging situations that took a toll on her emotional and physical well-being, her time as a caseworker profoundly shaped her understanding of compassion, resilience, and Christ's love for all His children. In this episode, Brittni helps us understand some of the most challenging parts of a caseworker's role, how big of an impact community support can have on caseworkers, what kinds of resources can make a meaningful difference for local agencies, and much more. Find resources mentioned and more in the show notes for this episode: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/brittni-hodges-264/

How much do you know about the foster care community where you live? Many people—both individuals and organizations like churches—want to support their vulnerable neighbors. But few are aware of the many practical ways they can help the children, biological families, foster families, and agency workers who make up their local foster care communities. When our latest guest discovered the overwhelming needs of her local foster care community, she was passionate about getting her local church involved. But when she first set out to make this a reality, her mission turned out to be harder than expected. Her experience is a common one that's happening all over America. The truth is, many people care, but they don't always know how to help. April Hobbs is a passionate champion for foster care as well as a devoted wife and mother. She and husband, Derrick, became foster parents seven years ago and they find tremendous purpose and joy in serving vulnerable families. When April wanted to see her local foster care agency supported by the church, she joined our team of TFI Advocates and started her own ministry in Murray County, GA. It's through this partnership that she was able to break through the barriers and get the church involved in meeting the needs of her local agency workers and the families they serve. In this episode, April shares powerful words about how God calls us to act, what factors often prevent Christians from doing more to serve vulnerable families, the importance of sharing the difficult parts of the fostering journey, and much more. Find resources mentioned and more in the show notes for this episode: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/april-hobbs-263/

Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs) can affect children from any background, but those in foster care are especially vulnerable. There are ten main types of ACEs that have been identified—ranging from abuse to neglect to household dysfunction. All of them have the potential to negatively impact future outcomes for a child. Our latest guest, Angela Paganelli, is a former foster youth who experienced all ten ACEs. After the tragic loss of her mother at the age of 13, Angela spent her teenage years in foster care and institutional settings. These formative experiences shaped her passion for supporting children in care, leading her to start her own foster care ministry. Together with her husband, Rick, Angela has raised three biological children, fostered over 20 children, and adopted four. As a TBRI practitioner, Angela leverages her experience to advocate for trauma-informed care in the foster care system. In this episode, Angela shares explains what ACEs are and what their long-term impacts can look like, why it's crucial to help children in the foster care system feel seen, the power “do-overs” can have in one's healing process, and much more. Find resources mentioned and more in the show notes for this episode: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/angela-paganelli-262/

According to the U.S. Department of Agriculture, 13.5% of U.S. households were food insecure at some time during 2023. Unfortunately, food-related trauma is a common challenge for many children who have entered the foster care system. Whether it's an aversion to a particular type of food, fear that there won't be enough food, or a tendency to overeat and hoard food, there are many behaviors a child may exhibit as a result of their past experiences. When these behaviors occur, it's important to meet them with curiosity and kindness. Madison Tyler, a foster and adoptive parent who has been a pediatric dietitian for 13 years, is here to help us understand more about a child's relationship with food. Madison and her husband became foster parents in 2017. Over the years, they have welcomed and witnessed reunification for several children. Today, Madison integrates her professional expertise with her personal experience to help families navigate food challenges, build trust, and foster connection around the table. In this episode, you'll hear strategies you can use to respond to some of the most common challenges foster and adoptive parents encounter around food, what a Harvard study says is the single most important factor in determining a person's health and longevity, practical tips for helping your child develop a positive relationship with food, and much more. Find resources mentioned and more in the show notes for this episode: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/madison-tyler-261/

For our very first episode of 2025, we're bringing you another great conversation that sheds light on the real people of the foster care community. In this episode, we are talking to Keristein Fox. Today, she's a happily married stay-at-home mom who loves watching her three children grow and thrive. But Keristein's story wasn't always this joyful. She endured many dark seasons to reach where she is now. For many years, she struggled with addiction, ultimately encountering the foster care system firsthand when her daughter was placed in kinship care. At first, Keristein despised the system. But after overcoming her addiction, she sees it in a different light. In this episode, you'll hear about how addiction can push people toward actions they regret, the crucial role kinship care can play in the foster care system, how Jesus offers hope and healing in even the most dire of circumstances, and much more. Find resources mentioned and more in the show notes for this episode: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/keristein-fox-260/

Trigger Warning: We want to let our listeners know that this episode includes mentions of sexual abuse, physical abuse, and thoughts of suicide. If you are sensitive to any of these topics, we recommend you listen with caution. From the day she entered the world, Lucy Baker felt as though she didn't have a home. Born inside of a jail to a mother in crisis, she was immediately placed into foster care and would end up having 37 different homes in her lifetime. Because of the extensive trauma she endured growing up, Lucy always struggled to feel as though she belonged. But Lucy knows that her past doesn't define her future—and she's found comfort in knowing that God always has a purpose for her life. Lucy is a devoted Christ-follower, author, and speaker. Her formative years were tumultuous due to a complex family situation and challenging circumstances in foster care, but despite all the adversity she's faced, Lucy has reclaimed her story. Today, she's inspiring others to embrace the life-changing hope and healing only Jesus can bring. In this episode, you'll hear from Lucy about how an unpredictable childhood can warp a child's worldview and sense of belonging, some of the struggles children in foster care often face but may not verbalize, how Jesus is our true home and source of stability, and much more. Find resources mentioned and more in the show notes for this episode: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/lucy-baker-259/

When a child enters our home, there are many factors we consider to ensure their comfort and safety. However, one important aspect of a child's well-being can often be overlooked—their hair care. This is especially true if the child comes from a different racial background, where hair care needs may differ significantly. Hair is an important part of African American culture and identity, but white foster parents sometimes struggle to understand how to care for types and textures of hair that are unlike their own. And for some children, caring for their hair can be emotionally or physically painful if it has been neglected for a long time. Nurturing a child's hair is an essential part of transracial fostering or adoption, and that's why I'm so grateful our latest guest was able to join us. After earning a master's degree in social work, Authrine T.K. Singleton began a career in child welfare. Through her work, she saw the gap in support for African American children placed in foster and adoptive homes. In 2009, she opened Master's Touch Salon to be a resource and support to these families. In this episode, you'll hear common mistakes to avoid when caring for the hair of an African American child, practical tips for creating an effective hair and skin care routine tailored to the child's needs, why proper care and styling of hair is a crucial bonding experience, and much more. Find resources mentioned and more in the show notes for this episode: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/authrine-singleton-258/

It's natural to wonder who your birth parents are. In fact, this is a question that many foster and adoptive children wrestle with. For children, teens, and even adults who have never known their biological parents, curiosity about their identity often goes hand in hand with a fear of the unknown. And for foster and adoptive parents, broaching this topic can bring up worries around the answers your child may find, and how what they uncover could heal or hurt them. My guests today have navigated these questions and concerns from the perspectives of an adoptive child, adoptive parent, and birth mom. Kyle Bullock was adopted as a baby by Ellyn Bullock and her husband. As a teen, he began to have questions about his birth mom and set out to find her. After a search on MySpace, he found Michelle Hubble and discovered answers about his past. What followed was a long and rich relationship with both his birth mom and adoptive parents. In this episode, our guests dive into the importance of discovering your identity, the challenges of interracial adoption, advice for people who may want to seek out their birth parents but feel nervous, and much more. Find resources mentioned and more in the show notes for this episode: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/kyle-bullock-257/

Over the summer, Sound of Hope: The Story of Possum Trot hit theaters across the country. This film tells the powerful true story of Donna and Bishop Martin as they ignited a fire in the hearts of their rural church to embrace children in foster care who needed a home. Their East Texas community stepped up to do the impossible and adopt 77 children out of foster care. There were many challenges along the way, but through the grace of God and the strength of their conviction, they came together and transformed lives. Their story is a testament to the call for Christians to care for orphans and ensure every child knows the love and security of a family. I am so thrilled to have gotten the chance to sit down and chat with Donna and Bishop—the pair who led this inspiring movement. In this episode, you'll hear the circumstances that led Bishop and Donna to serve the foster care community, why their action inspired a community to do the same, how God has given a specific charge to the church to help children in need, and much more. Find resources mentioned and more in the show notes for this episode: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/bishop-donna-martin-256/

When you decide to become a foster parent, you are asked a wide range of questions about what kind of placements you are willing to accept. What ages will you take? What ages won't you take? Are there any special needs you will or won't be able to accommodate? What about sibling groups? Even when your agency is doing their best to reach out to you about children that fit your criteria, the reality is that sometimes all of the information about a child is simply not known. They may not know the specific behaviors a child presents, every piece of their history, or additional challenges that you may face. There are times where, despite everyone's best intentions, a placement needs to be disrupted, which can be a decision filled with guilt, shame, and deep heartache. My guest today has firsthand experience navigating a placement disruption and all the emotions that come along with it. Kamrie Smith is a mom to three biological children and a current foster mom to one. In total, she and her husband have fostered 21 children over the years. She is a founding committee member of Foster Montana, an organization that provides support to children entering foster care and the families who say “yes” to them. In this episode, you'll hear why it can be challenging to navigate a placement that feels like it isn't going well, how to navigate the emotional aftermath of a disruption, how to make peace with the difficult decision of accepting or denying a potential placement, and more. Find resources mentioned and more in the show notes for this episode: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/kamrie-smith-255/

It's that time of year again! As you may know, we open applications to become a TFI Advocate only a couple times each year, and this November is one of those opportunities. If you're considering applying, today's episode is the perfect chance to learn more about what becoming a TFI Advocate journey really looks like. That's because we have the special treat of hearing from one of our most recently launched Advocates, Justin Meehan. Justin and his wife have been foster parents for the last three years. Currently, they have three biological children and a soon-to-be adopted son. Justin is a newly launched TFI Advocate in Rochester, NH, where he is bridging the gap between his church and the local state foster care agency. In this episode, you'll hear what kind of support and community TFI Advocates receive, how seeing the struggles caseworkers are facing firsthand opened Justin's eyes to their unmet needs, why answering just one question for your local church can help them get involved in foster care, and so much more. Find resources mentioned and more in the show notes for this episode: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/justin-meehan-254/

To make a positive impact on the foster care community, we need action on both a personal and systemic level. We need community members who are willing to step up and support individuals directly, but we also need leaders capable of creating policies that address real challenges. My guest for this episode, Lynn Johnson, is someone who has stepped into both of these roles. Lynn served as Assistant Secretary for the Administration for Children and Families in the US Department of Health and Human Services, which is a Senate-confirmed appointment where she led over 60 programs designed to make a real impact on lives all across the country. It was in this position that she created the ALL IN Foster Care and Adoption Challenge as a national call for people at all levels of government, as well as community members, to commit to being ALL IN for America's children. Today, she continues this work as the President of ALL IN Empowering Futures, a non-profit agency combating the crises of children aging out of the foster care system, adoption, poverty, and human trafficking.  In this episode, Lynn shares the lessons she's learned from serving the foster care community on both a broad and personal scale, what she feels is the true measure of a successful program, how we can best serve adults who were formerly in foster care, and much more. Find resources mentioned and more in the show notes for this episode: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/lynn-johnson-253/

Have you ever had a foster placement or adoption plan fall through? Initially, you feel excited about the prospect of welcoming another child into your home. You start gathering things you think the child may need. Clothes. Toys. School supplies. But then you get another call that the plan is being changed. On one hand, you're grateful there's still a plan to keep the child safe, but on the other hand you feel a deep sense of loss and grief. Learning to hold multiple conflicting emotions is a core part of foster care. All along the journey, we are holding both joy and grief. Beauty and hardship. Holding on and letting go. My guest today knows precisely what this feels like. Melissa McGilliard has been married to Chris for sixteen years and is a stay-at-home mom to their three boys, the youngest of which joined their family through foster care. In this episode, Melissa shares some of the raw emotions she has experienced as a foster parent, why better understanding herself has helped her better support her adopted child, and the importance of allowing your heart to hold conflicting emotions. Find resources mentioned and more in the show notes for this episode: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/melissa-mcgilliard-252/

“I couldn't become a foster parent because I'd get too attached.” This is a sentiment we've heard many times from those considering foster care. We know that foster care is full of the good and the hard; both beauty and brokenness. Overcoming our fears and holding space for both of these things is no easy task. And in my guest's experience, the fear of getting too attached is the very thing that makes you a good candidate to become a foster parent. Caitlyn Baten has been married to her best friend, Tim, for six years. She's an adoptive and foster mom, is passionate about advocacy and ethical storytelling, and is a devoted follower of Christ. Caitlyn spent most of her professional career in the counter-trafficking space and now works for Buckner International where she comes alongside churches and engages them in the domestic and international work they do. In this episode, Caitlyn shares her honest experience of becoming a foster parent, why becoming attached to a whole family is important, practical advice for preparing for visits with biological parents, and the importance of giving yourself space for heavy emotions when a child reunifies. Find resources mentioned and more in the show notes: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/caitlyn-baten-251/

Open adoptions began in 1975, but they didn't become more common until the 1990s. Today, 9 out of 10 adoptions are open. While open adoptions are far more common today, adoptive parents may have concerns and fears about navigating that relationship with a child's birth parents. Likewise, birth parents are often worried about finding the place they belong in the process and entrusting someone else to care for their child while still maintaining a relationship. Today, I have the privilege of learning from and listening to someone who was formerly in foster care and who is also a birth mother. Jori Victory is an advocate for healthy, open adoption, mental health resources, and post-placement care for birth mothers. She lives in Utah with her four children. In this episode, Jori shares with us her experience of navigating the birth and adoptive parent relationship, the importance of remaining in a child's life, the loss that can come with not knowing your biological parents, and the challenge of discovering your identity in the midst of complex circumstances. Find resources mentioned and more in the show notes: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/jori-victory-250/

TW: This episode contains mentions of drug use, physical abuse, and sexual abuse. If these topics could be triggering for you or others, we wanted you to be aware of these topics before listening. The trauma of our past can often define us and inform what we think and how we behave. This can create a cycle in which we are far more likely to repeat the mistakes of those who have gone before us. As Darnella Miller was growing up, her mother was caught in a cycle of drug addiction, placing Darnella in many unsafe situations that led to multiple forms of abuse and eventually removal from her mother's care. Today, Darnella is the Founder and CEO of BornCovered, a program where she gets to use her personal journey through foster care, teenage parenthood, and aging out of the system to empower, support, and uplift young girls and youth facing similar challenges. A Brooklyn native, Darnella is deeply committed to her family. She is happily married, with three daughters and three bonus sons. In this episode, you'll hear the emotions children may experience when being placed in foster care, how Darnella has broken generational cycles, and how the system can offer valuable support. Find resources mentioned and more in the show notes for this episode: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/darnella-miller-249/

There can be a lot of pressure on foster parents to always step up and say “yes” to each placement. One of the reasons many became foster parents was to be able to make a significant difference, so doesn't that mean accepting as many placements as you are able? But what happens if you say “no” to a placement? What if you say “no” when a child in foster care is able to be adopted? My guests, AJ and Katrina Nowaczyk, know what it feels like to have to say “no.” They have fostered nine children. While they didn't set out to only foster, they learned a lot whenever the opportunity to adopt a child came up. In multiple cases, the circumstances pointed to needing to say “no.” In this episode, you'll learn what goes into saying yes and no, that there is no one-size-fits-all formula, and the importance of approaching each situation with prayer. Find resources mentioned and more in the show notes: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/prayerful-decisions/

In terms of foster care, my guest has experienced it all. She entered foster care at age four and then reunited with her mom only to be removed from her mother's care again. In total, she had twelve placements, lived in a group home, and would finally make the decision to emancipate. Tori Petersen is a bestselling author, national speaker, and Bible teacher. She shares her testimony and life as authentically as possible to help and offer hope to others. Tori is known for her fierce advocacy work for foster care, adoption, and vulnerable children. At home, she is a wife and mama, who deeply values family, community, and hospitality. In this episode, Tori shares what life was like as a young child, the ups and downs of her life in foster care, positive aspects of her experience that made a lasting impact on her life, how she found hope for the future, and much more. Find resources mentioned and more in the show notes: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/foster-care-tori-petersen/

It's not as common that we get to hear the perspective and experience of biological parents in the foster care community, but it's such an important perspective for us to hear and understand. My guest, Ashley, found herself caught in addiction after being exposed to narcotic painkillers during a hospital stay for several clots in her brain. When her drug use spiraled out of control, it led to her son being removed from her custody and put into foster care. Ashley's story is one of brokenness but also one of redemption. In this episode, you'll hear about the circumstances that can lead to a child being removed, the unique perspective of a birth parent, the complexity of addiction, and the important role foster parents can play. Find resources mentioned and more in the show notes: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/birth-parent-perspective/

Parenting is not for the faint of heart. It takes work every day to understand how to best love our kids, teach them, and correct them. Add to that learning how to parent a child who has gone through trauma, and you realize you need a completely different set of tools. Strategies that may have worked for our biological children now seem to have the opposite effect on our kids. Kristin Berry is the co-founder of The Resilient Caregiver (formerly The Honestly Adoption Company), an author, podcaster, as well as a foster and adoptive parent. She is passionate about helping caregivers learn how to reframe their perspective on their child's trauma history and respond to behaviors with compassion and connection. Kristin and her husband, Mike, have fostered for nine years and have had 23 children come through their doors. In this episode, Kristin gives practical insight into why traditional parenting doesn't work for kids who have experienced trauma, how you can parent in a way that promotes connection, and how to take away the power of negative behaviors. Find resources mentioned and more in the show notes for this episode: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/kristin-berry-trauma-informed/

Have you wanted to foster or adopt but just don't know if it's the “right time?” My guest for this episode can relate! Jason Johnson and his wife knew they wanted to become foster parents, but were unsure when they should pursue it or how it might affect their biological children. Jason is a speaker, writer, former pastor, and church planter who encourages families and equips church and organizational leaders on their foster care and adoption journeys. He is also the Director of Church Mobilization and Engagement with Christian Alliance for Orphans (CAFO). Jason has a deep passion for seeing the gospel catalyze a movement of foster care in the church around the world. Jason and his wife, Emily, are foster and adoptive parents who live in Texas with their four daughters. In this episode, you'll hear how Jason started his foster care journey, how to find the “perfect” time to foster or adopt, tips for navigating the concern of loving a child that might leave your family, and learn a new way to look at comments from strangers about your adoptive or foster family. Whether you are currently a foster parent, are considering becoming one, or know someone who is, I know you will be encouraged by what Jason shares in this conversation! Find resources mentioned and more in the show notes for this episode: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/jason-johnson-perfect-time/

Does this sound familiar to you? The child in your care comes home from school and after having a snack and telling you about their day, you sit down to help them with their homework. In an instant, it's like you have an entirely different child. They throw themselves on the floor in rage or even check out entirely at the mere mention of homework. Or maybe you receive what feels like daily calls from their school updating you about something that happened during the day or asking you to come pick them up early. These are just a couple of many scenarios you may find yourself in when caring for a child who has experienced trauma. It can feel like all the tactics you've learned or used in the past don't work anymore. My guest today can relate! Cherilyn Orr has a background in education spanning from the pre-school to university level along with extensive professional development in trauma-informed care. Launched out of her own need as a parent to help her children, Cherilyn developed the Stoplight Approach which simplifies complex brain science into a common language to transform relationships. She is a mother to many—three biological, four adopted, and multiple children through foster care. In this episode, you'll learn what is going on inside your child's brain in these chaotic moments, what the Stoplight Approach is, and some practical tools for trauma-informed care to add to your toolbelt. Find resources mentioned and more in the show notes for this episode: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/cherilyn-orr-248/

What happens when a child ages out of foster care? In addition to processing the grief of what they've lost, children in this circumstance have to navigate the world as an adult sometimes completely on their own. This is the story of my guest today. Jessica Cawthorn and her siblings were cared for by extended family after the death of her parents. But in the 9th Grade, Jessica formally entered foster care and aged out of the foster care system at 18 years old. Today, Jessica works for the Administration of Children and Families and is a Texas CASA Board Member. She is married to her husband, Jonathan, and they have three children together—two through adoption and one by birth. In this conversation, you'll hear some of the circumstances that led to a failed adoption, how Jessica faced aging out on her own, and practical ways we can support children who are about to age out of care. Find resources mentioned and more in the show notes for this episode: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/jessica-cawthorn-247/

“I may be single and fostering by myself, but I am far from alone.” Community is a crucial aspect of anyone's journey of becoming a foster parent as you navigate court dates, visitations, doctor's appointments, school activities, big emotions, and more. When you're a single foster parent, juggling all of those dynamics can be even more complex. Emma Finton had a passion ever since she was young to become a foster parent, and ultimately became a licensed foster parent in November of 2022. She is currently providing care for two children. On top of that, she enjoys her work as a nanny. In this episode, Emma shares how she knew it was the right time to become a foster parent, the challenges of being a single foster mom, tips she uses to manage the chaos, and the importance of having a supportive community around you. Find resources mentioned and more in the show notes: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/emma-finton-246/

At four years old, Sheena Wood was told that she had to make herself “adoptable.” She had medical challenges with her eyesight, feeling lost and alone as she navigated the journey of foster care, moving from foster home to foster home throughout her early childhood. She felt rejected and didn't know if anyone would want her or if she would be able to find a place to belong. Today, Sheena is a mother of five, married to her college sweetheart, and serves in a church in Florida along with her husband, Josh. In this episode, Sheena shares what it was like to experience foster care, how well-intentioned advice can go wrong, why our words matter as caregivers to children who have experienced trauma, and why “Amazing Grace” helped her feel truly seen. Find resources mentioned and more in the show notes for this episode: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/sheena-wood-245/

Regardless of our place in the foster care community, understanding who we are, who we belong to, and where our sense of security comes from is vital to our confidence in where we belong. It is such an honor to have Trisha Priebe on the podcast. She's an adoptee and adoptive mom who serves as the Sr. Communications Coordinator for Lifesong for Orphans. Trisha is also a speaker and writer who has published 16 books. She lives in Michigan's Upper Peninsula, where she is wife to her husband, Luke, and is mom to three. In this episode, we explore why every adoptee's experience is unique, how foster care and adoption teach us the complexity of love, why parenting any child is a leap of faith, and the importance of helping our children identify truth. Find resources mentioned and more in the show notes: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/trisha-priebe-244/

This week, I have a powerful story to share with you from a former foster child, adoptee, and advocate for human rights. I am honored to introduce you to my guest, Dr. Mary Ann McMillan. She is a passionate advocate for foster youth and adoptees, whose advocacy is deeply personal because it's inspired by her own experience as an adoptee who spent many years in foster care. Mary Ann serves as a professor and administrator at Jessup University in California and has previously served as a missionary in Ukraine and the Czech Republic, leading trainings in nearly 30 countries. In this episode, you'll hear Mary Ann's personal experience in the foster care system, the importance of understanding and processing your past, the important role therapy has played in her story, and much more. Find resources mentioned and more in the show notes for this episode: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/mary-ann-mcmillan-243/

When foster care feels overwhelming, how do we hold on to hope? How do we define success? How do we find light when so much feels dark? Nate and Kristen Crew are my guests on the podcast today. They have been married for almost 15 years and have 7 children – four adopted through foster care and three by birth. Rather than a specific “calling” to foster, they pursued foster care out of a desire to live out the basic commands in Scripture to care for those who are vulnerable. Nate is a pastor at CityLight Church in Virginia and together they love to encourage others through what God has taught them. In this episode, you'll hear how Nate and Kristen strive to live out their calling as Christians, the difference that reliance on God has made in their story, why it doesn't require a “special moment” to start getting involved with foster care, how to hold on to hope when the journey is hard, and more. Find resources mentioned and more in the show notes: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/nate-kristen-crew-242/

For teens (and for any child in foster care), how can we create spaces where they are safe, feel belonging, and develop their sense of independence? How can we give them involvement in the development of what that space looks like? My guest today is a dear friend, Chandler James. Chandler used to be an Advocate Coach here at The Forgotten Initiative and today is the Director of Church Mobilization for The Riverside Project, a nonprofit dedicated to transforming the foster care system in Houston. Chandler and his wife, Caitlin, are foster parents and are currently supporting four teens, three of whom have aged out of foster care and one that they have permanency of. In our conversation, you'll hear helpful principles for creating a sense of belonging for children who have experienced trauma, the challenges they've experienced of supporting teens as young parents, how to communicate boundaries while providing independence, the importance of caring for teens in foster care, and so much more. Find links to resources mentioned and more in the show notes: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/chandler-james-241/

You may have seen us talking about our brand new podcast Just Neighbors. Well today, we're sharing one of those conversations right here on The Forgotten Podcast! This was such a powerful episode, with challenging and honest takeaways for those who follow Christ in our complex world. Just Neighbors is a podcast for every believer who desires to live as Jesus lived – to act justly, love mercy, and walk humbly with God and neighbor. My co-host, Ryan MacDonald, and I are joined by Dr. Krish Kandiah for this conversation about how to combine word and deed to provide belonging for our neighbors. Krish is the founder of The Sanctuary Foundation, a charity supporting refugees to find welcome, work, and worthwhile housing in the UK. His mission is to help solve some of society's seemingly intractable problems through partnerships across civil society, faith communities, government, and philanthropy. In this episode, Krish helps us understand the important work they are doing, the largest challenges he sees for people who are removed from their homes, and how Christ followers should respond to the complex conflicts happening across our world. Beyond that, he guides us in seeing that displacement is happening all around us, as children are placed in foster care, people move to a new city for their jobs, and people feel like they don't belong. Listen in! Find resources mentioned and more in the show notes: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/krish-kandiah-240/

During the month of June, applications to become a TFI Advocate are open! TFI Advocates bridge the gap between churches and agencies right in their local community. Get the details and apply right here. Whether a child has experienced foster care or adoption, there is history and trauma to navigate. As you can imagine, this can spill over into eating habits, behavior issues, and affect children's sleep. Many foster parents and caregivers experience the difficulty of seeking help from someone trained in both foster/adoptive backgrounds and sleep practices. That was the case for my guest, Allison Ezell. When her first adopted son came home from China in 2016, she spent years unsuccessfully searching for sleep help that took into account his history. Today, she now gets to do for others what no one could do for her all those years ago: build a bridge between sleep science principles and trauma-informed care. Allison is a Certified Pediatric Sleep Consultant and a mom of four through birth, foster care, and international adoption. She has a special passion for working with foster and adoptive families who are navigating sleep issues with their children. In this episode, you'll learn how isolating dealing with sleep issues in children who have experienced trauma can be, the importance of setting realistic expectations based on a child's history and biology, navigating bedtime with multiple children, and so much more. Find resources and more in the show notes: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/allison-ezell-239/

During the month of June, applications to become a TFI Advocate are open! TFI Advocates bridge the gap between churches and agencies right in their local community. Get the details and apply right here. We cover many topics here on The Forgotten Podcast from how to know when to start fostering, real stories of people throughout the foster care community, how churches can get involved, and more. But in this episode, we are talking about an aspect of foster parenting we don't often address: What happens when you reach the end of the journey of active foster parenting? How do you know when you should be done fostering and begin providing wrap-around support? My guest, Lisa Robertson, knows all about this journey as her family made the hard choice to stop fostering in October of 2023 after many years of active foster parenting. She has been a foster and adoptive parent and is the Executive Director for Hope Bridge, a non-profit that advocates for change in the Ohio foster care system by mobilizing churches and equipping communities to serve. Lisa has many years of experience in advocacy, biological family relationship preservation, and the preventative work of keeping families together. It's never easy to let go of something that is so close to your heart. In this conversation, we discuss what questions foster parents should consider before closing their license, how to identify when it is time to stop fostering, the heaviest parts of letting go of such a large part of your life, the opportunities to still serve the foster care community after foster parenting, and much more. Find links to resources mentioned and more in the show notes: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/lisa-robertson-238/

Applications to become a TFI Advocate are open in June! TFI Advocates bridge the gap between churches and agencies right in their local community. Get the details and apply right here. Foster care and baseball. On the surface, these two things don't sound related at all, but my guest this week would beg to differ. Emily Cole is the co-owner with her husband, Jesse, of the Savannah Bananas, a baseball team based in Savannah, Georgia. Their vision is to make baseball fun, put fans first, and always entertain. In addition to owning and operating a baseball team, Emily and Jesse are also biological, foster, and adoptive parents. They even use their baseball platform to further impact the foster care community through their nonprofit, Bananas Foster. Emily is passionate about helping the foster care community by celebrating and advocating for those involved. In this episode, you'll hear how baseball and foster care collide in Emily's life, a vision for the future of foster care, how vital it is to have your village established as a foster parent, and so much more! Get links to resources and key takeaways in the show notes: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/emily-cole-237/

Applications to become a TFI Advocate are open in June! TFI Advocates bridge the gap between churches and agencies right in their local community. Get the details and apply right here. Court can be hard to understand and difficult to navigate for everyone involved. How does a case progress? Can a foster parent attend court dates for biological parents? Should they? Thankfully, I have an expert with me to help explain what happens at court from the lens of someone who is there every day–a judge. I have the honor of speaking with Judge Brian Goldrick. He has been a part of the Child Protection Division of the court in McLean County for over 32 years. Judge Goldrick started in 1992 as an Assistant Public Defender, then served as the Contract Guardian Ad Litem (GAL) before becoming an Associate Circuit Judge. In this episode, you'll hear the process of a case through court, what rights foster parents have, how such weighty decisions are made, and much more. Listen in! Get resources and takeaways in the show notes: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/brian-goldrick-236/

Applications to become a TFI Advocate are opening in June! Get the details and sign-up to be notified when applications are live right here. Today's conversation made me a little emotional because I never could have imagined what God would do with this ministry when I launched it over a decade ago. I could have never imagined that we would have leaders across the nation who are stepping in and supporting their local foster care community! These Advocates act as a bridge, bringing encouragement and support to agencies by helping churches understand the best way to engage and meet needs contextually. Today, I get the honor of introducing you to a couple of incredible people who are also team members here at The Forgotten Initiative: Jody Vanderburg and Liz Archambault. They serve in the role of Advocate Coaches, helping Advocates navigate the challenges specific to their area and bring their unique experience and personality to the role. We are so grateful to have both of them on our team! In this episode, you'll hear how foster care intersected with each of their lives, what traits make an effective Advocate, the most meaningful parts about supporting local leaders as an Advocate Coach, and so much more! Show Notes: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/jody-liz-235/

Can you remember the child, family, or experience that inspired you to become a part of the foster care community? It's likely you were inspired because you heard their story or got to see their action firsthand. With an understanding of the power of story and a passion for children who are waiting for their forever families, Kaycee Stanley and her husband, Pete, launched The Reel Hope Project. The Reel Hope Project tells the stories of children awaiting an adoptive family using videos as a recruitment resource for prospective adoptive families. Their goal is to see an end to youth waiting for families by mobilizing the church to take action. In this episode, you'll hear how God has used these videos to inspire action, how the Church can make a difference for children waiting for families, how they are supporting agency workers in giving children a voice, and so much more! Show Notes: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/kaycee-stanley-234/ Check out our brand new podcast, Just Neighbors: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/just-neighbors-podcast/

You will often hear us say, “You don't have to foster to care.” One of the most important aspects of foster parenting (without burning out) is having a supportive community of people around you. I have the honor today of talking with someone in this critical support role. Maddie Box  is 26 years old and works as a pediatric speech-language pathologist, and she has organically found herself in the role of a support person to multiple foster parents. In this episode, you'll hear how this role is far more critical than many people realize, some of the simple ways foster parents need support, the most practical way to offer help, and so much more. Show Notes: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/maddie-box-233/

Decisions made in court hold a lot of weight for the futures of children and families. Due to the impact that decision could potentially have, the role Court Appointed Special Advocates (CASA) was introduced to ensure all information was being considered. The role of a CASA before began in 1977. Today, 939 state CASA/GAL organizations operate in 49 states, which serve 242,000 children annually. Travis and Stephanie Johnson are two of the dedicated volunteers who serve the foster care community in their role as CASAs. In this episode, you'll hear more about what it means to be a CASA, what the weekly responsibility often looks like, why Travis and Stephanie stepped into this role, and more valuable insights from their experience. Show Notes: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/travis-stephanie-johnson-232/ Give to The Forgotten Initiative: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/give/

Nobody starts working in the foster care system because they think it's going to be easy. The truth is, despite how deeply fulfilling a career in this field can be—it can also feel stressful and discouraging at times. For both new and experienced workers, it's easy to feel defeated and wonder if the work you're doing is enough. If there's anyone who can help us understand this better, it's Carmen Nance—a woman with 30 years of experience serving the foster care community as part of the State of Georgia/Cobb County Department of Family and Children Services. In this episode, Carmen shares the valuable insights she learned from interacting with people from every side of the foster care system, why a community of supportive peers is crucial for workers in the foster care community, what social workers wish people knew about the challenges and rewards of this role, and so much more. Show Notes: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/carmen-nance-231/ Get Foster Care & the Church, a free video series for your church!

If a child in the foster care system spent 18 years in the same home, you might assume that they developed a strong sense of belonging within the family. But unfortunately, this is not always the case. When Tash Haynes was born, her biological mother was unable to raise a child due to a mental disability. Fortunately, Tash was taken in by a family—but after growing up in their house until she aged out of the foster care system, Tash felt that although her basic needs had been met, her emotional needs had not. Today, Tash is a renowned content creator, a community builder, and a mother of three girls. She is beyond proud of the family and career she's been able to build despite the obstacles life has thrown her way. In this episode, Tash gets candid about why it's crucial to make sure children in foster care feel a sense of belonging, how showing her own daughters love is helping to heal the little girl inside of her, how God's redemptive character has been on display in her life, and so much more. Show Notes: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/tash-haynes-230/ Get Foster Care & the Church free!

The lives of today's guests are deeply intertwined. Jennifer Bracken's childhood was rocky. After a difficult home life and several tumultuous years spent in the foster care system, she became a mother to four children and her struggles with addiction led to her family experiencing the foster care system in various ways. Jillana Goble is a speaker, author, and advocate who fostered and adopted Jennifer's third child before fostering and reuniting Jennifer's fourth child. Over the past 15 years, Jillana and Jennifer have taken steps to build a positive relationship. Today, they live a mile away from one another and their lives are interconnected in a beautiful way. Their journey together wasn't always smooth sailing—but due to their mutual effort, courage, and vulnerability, they have developed deep trust and connection. In this episode, Jennifer and Jillana talk about how they've navigated the ups and downs of building their relationship, how foster parents can form connections with birth parents in a safe and healthy way, the importance of extending the olive branch early, and so much more. Don't miss this one! Show Notes: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/jillana-jennifer-229/ Get Foster Care & the Church free!

We all pray for our children to form a strong relationship with Jesus that will last a lifetime. But the truth is, many young adults walk away from their faith once they move out. So what steps can we take to help our kids walk with Him throughout all the stages of their lives? Today's guest, Sarah Cowan Johnson, shares that a big part of the answer when we look at statistics lies in our parenting. Sarah is a ministry trainer, consultant, and coach who works with ministry leaders across the United States and leads seminars on family discipleship—showing parents how to help their children walk in the way of Jesus. Sarah shares key strategies for faith-based parenting in her book Teach Your Children Well: A Step-by-Step Guide for Family Discipleship. In this episode, Sarah explains the most common pitfalls that stop parents from working worship into their home lives (and how to overcome them), how to disciple children no matter how long they may live under your roof, why it's essential to let your kids ask questions and develop their own relationships with God, and so much more. Show Notes: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/sarah-cowan-johnson-228/ Get Foster Care & the Church free!

TW: While Joan does not go into specific details, this episode does contain mentions of her experiences of abuse, and we wanted you to be aware of that before listening. Our guests often share the traumatic memories their experiences in life have left them with. But today's guest shares what it's like for there to be pieces missing when she tries to recall her past. Joan Ulsher is a writer, philanthropist, retired U.S. Army Major, and an award-winning child advocate. During her own childhood, Joan survived abuse and experienced the foster care system firsthand. Today, she says many of her formative years feel like “Swiss cheese” because of all the holes in her memory. Joan tells her story in a memoir entitled Misplaced Childhood: A True Story of Resiliency and Child Advocacy. In this conversation, you'll hear how Joan has navigated her mind blocking out childhood memories, how her advocacy efforts have changed her inner narrative from that of a victim to that of a survivor, how finding Christ has given her life new purpose, and so much more. Show Notes: https://theforgotteninitiative.org/joan-ulsher-227/ Free Video Resource: Foster Care & the Church -- www.fostercare.church