Podcast appearances and mentions of soraya chemaly

Let's be real—being a woman isn't either empowering or exhausting… it's both, often at the same damn time. And the parts we're told to keep quiet about? The messy, emotional, deeply human ones? Those are exactly the conversations we need to have out loud.In this episode, I'm joined by Dr. Jessica Zucker, psychologist, writer, and creator of the viral #IHadaMiscarriage campaign. She's the author of I Had a Miscarriage: A Memoir, A Movement, and her newest book Normalize It: Upending the Silence, Stigma, and Shame That Shape Women's Lives is a battle cry for truth, healing, and visibility.We talk about the power of saying the quiet parts out loud—especially when it comes to miscarriage, reproductive health, grief, and the impossible expectations women are expected to carry. This is for anyone who's tired of pretending everything's fine and ready to tell the whole story—not just the polished parts.In This Episode, We Cover:✅ The emotional toll of silence, stigma, and “looking fine”✅ Why normalizing miscarriage, loss, and vulnerability matters✅ The importance of speaking up (even when it's uncomfortable)✅ Why telling your story is healing for you and for othersWhen we normalize what's real, we free ourselves—and each other. Let's stop hiding our stories and start healing through them.Connect with Jessica: Book: Normalize It: Upending the Silence, Stigma, and Shame that Shame Women's LivesIG: https://www.instagram.com/ihadamiscarriage/Related Podcast Episodes:The Good Mother Myth with Nancy Reddy | 274The Resilience Myth with Soraya Chemaly | 249127 / Trauma with Jessi BeyerGet up to $200 off Square hardware when you sign up at square.com/go/tiww ! #squarepodShare the Love:If you found this episode insightful, please share it with a friend, tag us on social media, and leave a review on your favorite podcast platform!

Soraya Chemaly is an award-winning author and activist. As a cultural critic, she writes and speaks frequently about gender norms, politics, and technology and their relationship to violence, risk, and social justice. She is the former Executive Director of The Representation Project and Director and co-founder of the Women's Media Center Speech Project, both dedicated to protecting and expanding women's civic and political participation. Her first book, Rage Becomes Her: The Power of Women's Anger, was recognized as a Best Book of 2018 by the Washington Post, Fast Company, Psychology Today, and NPR and has been translated into multiple languages. Her most recent book, The Resilience Myth, has just been released.   Host: Katie Koestner Editor: Evan Mader Producer:s Catrina Aglubat and Emily Wang

Philip welcomes three dynamic former guests of The Deep Dive to discuss the aftermath of our most recent election and the current mood and potential working strategies to create conditions for viable alternative(s) to the current social, economic and political models. The Drop – The segment of the show where Philip and his guest share tasty morsels of intellectual goodness and creative musings. Philip's Drop: Mr. Loverman – Bernardine Evaristo (https://groveatlantic.com/book/mr-loverman/) Soraya's Drop: Martyr! – Kaveh Akbar (https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/734476/martyr-by-kaveh-akbar/) Aida's Drop: The Contract with Black America – Tavis Smiley (https://www.amazon.com/Covenant-Black-America-Various-Contributors/dp/0883782774) Stephanie's Drop: Everything is Possible – Joseph Fronczak (https://yalebooks.yale.edu/book/9780300251173/everything-is-possible/) Special Guests: Aida Mariam Davis, Soraya Chemaly, and Stephanie Luce.

I'm beyond excited to bring you the BEST of 2024—a roundup of our most listened-to, loved, and impactful episodes of the year! This might just be my favorite episode to record each year because it's a chance to reflect on the amazing content, incredible guests, and powerful lessons we've shared. For those of you who are new to This Is Woman's Work, this episode is the perfect starting point, highlighting the episodes that resonated the most with our community. And for our longtime listeners, it's a fun trip down memory lane and a great reminder to revisit the conversations that made the biggest impact. Podcast Board Of Directors Alert!

When you think about resilience, what comes to mind?Our culture loves narratives about triumphing over hardship. And overcoming pain, heartbreak, and even abuse can make us stronger.However, uplifting “overcoming” too often comes at the expense of actually examining and addressing the lack of care, protection, and support people had to navigate on their path to resilience. We valorize grit and perseverance at the cost of people's health and wellbeing, encouraging them to just keep pushing past the point of burnout.My guest today pulls back the curtain on these narratives of overcoming adversity and building resilience to find that so much of the adversity people face is rooted in how we fail to care for ourselves and each other in our society. Real resilience, she says, isn't about your own personal toughness; it's about how we relate to and support each other.Soraya Chemaly is an award-winning author and activist. She writes and speaks frequently on topics related to gender norms, inclusivity, social justice, free speech, sexualized violence, and technology. She is the author of The Resilience Myth: New Thinking on Grit, Strength, and Growth after Trauma and Rage Becomes Her: The Power of Women's Anger, which was recognized as a Best Book of 2018 by the Washington Post, Fast Company, Psychology Today, and NPR. She has contributed to several anthologies, most recently Free Speech in the Digital Age and Believe Me: How Trusting Women Can Change The World. Soraya is also a co-producer of a WMC #NameItChangeIt PSA highlighting the effects of online harassment on women in politics in America.Listen to the full episode to hear:How Soraya made the connection between our toxic ideology of resilience and how we devalue community support and careHow the idea of “bouncing back” can actually impede change, both personal and socialHow resilience narratives flatten, decontextualize, and depoliticize trauma and recovery Why we need to shift our concept of resilience from individual to communal, cultural, and relationalHow “soldiering on” can perpetuate a lack of options within the systemThe false binaries we have to confront to dismantle the resilience of the status quoHow telling someone they are or need to be resilient shuts down opportunities for real care and supportLearn more about Soraya Chemaly:WebsiteInstagram: @sorayachemalyThe Resilience Myth: New Thinking on Grit, Strength, and Growth After Trauma​​Rage Becomes Her: The Power of Women's AngerBelieve Me: How Trusting Women Can Change the WorldFree Speech in the Digital AgeLearn more about Rebecca:rebeccaching.comWork With RebeccaSign up for the weekly Unburdened Leader EmailResources:EP 72: Identifying and Addressing the Burdens of Individualism with Deran Young & Dick SchwartzEP 113:  Curiosity as a Bridge: Uncovering Fears and Building Connections with Scott ShigeokaSeek: How Curiosity Can Transform Your Life and Change the WorldNicked, M. T. AndersonThe Light Eaters: How the Unseen World of Plant Intelligence Offers a New Understanding of Life on Earth, Zoë SchlangerKneecapChallengersSuccession The White Lotus

Resilience has become a buzzword in today's culture, thrown around by influencers, coaches, and even bootcamp instructors, all insisting we need to “push through” no matter the cost. But is resilience always the healthiest path forward? Does mental toughness, positivity, and grit serve us in the ways we think—or is there more nuance to uncover? In this episode, Nicole connects with Soraya Chemaly, activist and author of The Resilience Myth: New Thinking on Grit, Strength, and Growth after Trauma. Together, they challenge conventional ideas about resilience and explore a new way of thinking—one that shifts from individual grit to collective care and community connection. Soraya's previous book, Rage Becomes Her: The Power of Women's Anger, was widely acclaimed and named one of the Best Books of 2018 by the Washington Post, NPR, and Psychology Today. This conversation offers insight into what really matters: kindness, compassion, belonging, and care—for ourselves and each other. It's time to rethink resilience as more than just strength in isolation and embrace what it looks like to thrive, together. Connect With Our Guest: Soraya Chemaly Website: https://www.sorayachemaly.com/  Book: https://www.sorayachemaly.com/books  Simon & Schuster: https://www.simonandschuster.com/  Related Podcast Episodes: How to Ask for Help with Dr. Cynthia Bentzen-Mercer Stress Less and Fear(Less) with Rebecca Heiss Share the Love: If you found this episode insightful, please share it with a friend, tag us on social media, and leave a review on your favorite podcast platform!

 In this thought-provoking episode, we sit down with bestselling author Soraya Chemaly to dive into the complexities surrounding the concept of resilience, especially as it relates to race. We explore the idea of resilience as a cultural expectation—asking whether it truly empowers or instead serves to uphold systemic inequalities. Soraya shares insights from her book, The Resilience Myth: New Thinking on Grit, Strength, challenging the narrative that communities of color must be endlessly resilient in the face of oppression. Together, we discuss the impact of this narrative on marginalized communities, how it intersects with race and gender, and what it means for our understanding of healing and justice. As we transition to the next season of our podcast, focused on our own journey of racial awareness and healing, we consider whether it's time to redefine what true strength and support look like. 

How often have you found yourself overwhelmed by a deep-seated rage that seems to come out of nowhere? This episode is a must-listen for every mother who has ever felt the weight of unexpressed anger. Licensed professional counselor Nicole McNellis joins us to share her invaluable insights into the phenomenon of maternal rage—a topic that is often hidden beneath the surface but profoundly impacts the lives of many mothers. Nicole's journey into researching maternal rage sheds light on its prevalence and the critical need for resources tailored to this unique form of anger.As we discuss the stigmatization of female anger, you'll hear references to powerful works like "Rage Becomes Her" by Soraya Chemaly and "Mom Rage" by Mina Dubin. These books provide a deeper understanding of how societal norms exacerbate the issue by labeling female anger as hysteria, while male rage is often seen as acceptable. Nicole emphasizes that maternal rage isn't a sign of failure as a mother but a potent force that, when understood and managed, can lead to meaningful change. We also touch on practical strategies, such as involving children in chores, to help mitigate these intense emotions.Finally, the episode explores actionable steps both on an individual and societal level to manage maternal rage. From cognitive strategies like identifying triggers to advocating for structural changes such as equitable distribution of household responsibilities and better access to mental healthcare, we cover it all. Nicole's upcoming presentation for Postpartum Support International and the positive responses from her clients highlight the urgent need for ongoing conversations and collective action. Don't miss this empowering episode that aims to reshape societal views and provide real solutions for mothers everywhere.Support the showwww.bethtrammell.com

Successive governments have struggled with how to deal with China, balancing them as a geopolitical rival yet necessary trade partner. Recent moves from Labour have sent mixed signals, from the free speech act to the return of the Chagos Islands. Further decisions loom on the horizon. As Rachel Reeves seeks some economic wiggle room, can Labour resist the lure of the Chinese market? The Spectator's Katy Balls, and visiting fellow at the European Council on Foreign Relations (ECFR) James Crabtree, join the podcast to discuss further (02:05). Plus: as the first issue under The Spectator's new editor Michael Gove, what are his reflections as he succeeds Fraser Nelson? He reads an excerpt from his diary (19:05). Next: could the government's plans for dealing with extremism have unintended consequences on young men? With plans to reclassify extreme misogyny as extremism, Toby Young argues this week that Labour's broadening of this issue exposes the flaws of the Prevent strategy. For all the focus on ‘toxic masculinity', do we risk alienating and prematurely criminalising teenagers? Toby joins the podcast, alongside The Spectator's deputy features editor – often host of this podcast – Gus Carter (22:05). And finally: the rise of the female fight club. Emily Rhodes talks about her experience taking up kickboxing, and the unexpected consequence of channelling her anger. How should women, and society, understand and deal with female anger? Emily joins the podcast, alongside the author of Rage Becomes Her, Soraya Chemaly, to explain (34:28). Hosted by William Moore and Lara Prendergast. Produced by Oscar Edmondson and Patrick Gibbons.

Successive governments have struggled with how to deal with China, balancing them as a geopolitical rival yet necessary trade partner. Recent moves from Labour have sent mixed signals, from the free speech act to the return of the Chagos Islands. Further decisions loom on the horizon. As Rachel Reeves seeks some economic wiggle room, can Labour resist the lure of the Chinese market? The Spectator's Katy Balls, and visiting fellow at the European Council on Foreign Relations (ECFR) James Crabtree, join the podcast to discuss further (02:05). Plus: as the first issue under The Spectator's new editor Michael Gove, what are his reflections as he succeeds Fraser Nelson? He reads an excerpt from his diary (19:05). Next: could the government's plans for dealing with extremism have unintended consequences on young men? With plans to reclassify extreme misogyny as extremism, Toby Young argues this week that Labour's broadening of this issue exposes the flaws of the Prevent strategy. For all the focus on ‘toxic masculinity', do we risk alienating and prematurely criminalising teenagers? Toby joins the podcast, alongside The Spectator's deputy features editor – often host of this podcast – Gus Carter (22:05). And finally: the rise of the female fight club. Emily Rhodes talks about her experience taking up kickboxing, and the unexpected consequence of channelling her anger. How should women, and society, understand and deal with female anger? Emily joins the podcast, alongside the author of Rage Becomes Her, Soraya Chemaly, to explain (34:28). Hosted by William Moore and Lara Prendergast. Produced by Oscar Edmondson and Patrick Gibbons.

On episode 200, Philip welcome author and activist Soraya Chemaly to the show. They discuss her latest book The Resilience Myth and how our belief systems on resilience, grit and strength impact us as individuals and as a society. The Drop – The segment of the show where Philip and his guest share tasty morsels of intellectual goodness and creative musings. Philip's Drop: Saving Our Own Lives: A Lberatory Practice of Harm Reduction – Shira Hassan (https://www.haymarketbooks.org/books/1938-saving-our-own-lives) Soraya's Drop: The Light Eaters: How the Unseen World of Plant Intelligence Offers a New Understanding of Life on Earth – Zoe Schlanger (https://www.harpercollins.com/products/the-light-eaters-zoe-schlanger?variant=41096248295458) Special Guest: Soraya Chemaly.

Welcome back F.A.B. Fam! This week the ladies review “The Resilience Myth, New Thinking on Grit, Strength, and Growth After Trauma” by Soraya Chemaly. In this thought-provoking exploration, cultural critic Soraya Chemaly challenges our most dearly held, common myths of resilience and dismantles the notions of resilience rooted in the philosophies of mind over matter, “mental toughness,” “strength,” and “positive thinking,” arguing that our modern version of “resilience” is a bill of goods sold to us by capitalism, colonialism, and ideologies that embrace supremacy over others. *Please be advised this episode is intended for adult audiences and contains adult language and content. We are expressing opinions on the show for entertainment purposes only.Dedication: To our patrons as always!! We love you! Moni: To visionaries of the world and the bold creativity they possess to inspire change! Kat:Notes:About the Author: https://www.sorayachemaly.com/About the Book: Publisher /‎ Atria/One Signal Publishers (May 21, 2024)Hardcover ‏:304 pages Audiobook: 8 hours 20 minutes Terrible, Thanks for asking: https://ttfa.org/episodes/the-resiliency-myth**Stranger than Fiction:

What comes to your mind when you picture someone who's resilient?  Usually, we hear that it's one person who's faced a setback, and they remain hopeful and willing to work through the challenges to return to some sort of life they had before. Maybe you've heard the phrase “pick themselves up by their bootstraps” to describe this type of person. We know we have. But that doesn't always work, as we continually say.  We have a guest today who's going to help us critically examine that image we have - and help us understand what we're missing.  She'll tell us we need to think critically about when it comes to glorifying resilience, especially if we're doing it for individual gain or to showcase individual strength, without realizing that the opposite of resilience is loneliness – we have to remember the communal and community contribution to the ability to be resilient. We're at a time in history where it feels - no matter your perspective - like the world is burning down around us. We want to trust that we will still be standing. To do it, we need to know when to be optimistic and when to be strategically pessimistic, not beat ourselves up when we're coming up against moral injury, embrace certain ways of thinking - cognitive flexibility, for those who want the big words - and hold onto hope for the collective, above all.   What to listen for: The inaccurate understanding Americans have of resilience – and how it needs to shift from an individual to a collective focus: the opposite of resilience is loneliness.  The mind-blowing study that shows us social status matter – and reexamining preconceptions and research in positive psychology, male-focused hardiness, and more. Rethinking popular portrayals of the upcoming generation – that, maybe, “younger people aren't distressed because they lack the right mindset or don't understand what is happening around them. They are distressed because the world is distressing, and adults have failed them.”  How do we find hope when it feels like the world is burning around us? Have openness to difference, openness to change, and acceptance of limits.  About Soraya:  Soraya Chemaly is an award-winning author and activist. As a cultural critic, she writes and speaks frequently about gender norms, social justice, free speech, sexualized violence, politics, and technology. The former Executive Director of The Representation Project and Director and co-founder of the Women's Media Center Speech Project, she has long been committed to expanding women's civic and political participation. Soraya is also the author of The Resilience Myth: New Thinking on Grit, Strength, and Growth after Trauma, a thought-provoking exploration that challenges our most dearly held, common myths of resilience and urges us to shift our perspective from prioritizing individualized traits and skills to uplifting collective care and open-ended connections with our communities. Her first book, Rage Becomes Her: The Power of Women's Anger, was recognized as a Best Book of 2018 by the Washington Post, Fast Company, Psychology Today, and NPR and has been translated into multiple languages. She is a contributor to several anthologies, most recently Free Speech in the Digital Age and Believe Me: How Trusting Women Can Change The World.  Soraya is also a co-producer of a WMC #NameItChangeIt PSA highlighting the effects of online harassment on women in politics in America.  Her work is featured widely in media, documentaries, books, and academic research. As an activist, Ms. Chemaly also spearheaded several successful global campaigns challenging corporations to address online hate and harassment, restrictive content moderation and censorship, and institutional biases that undermine equity and negatively affect free speech. Prior to 2010, Ms. Chemaly spent more than fifteen years as an executive and consultant in the media and data technology industries.  

In this episode, Dr. Kate and renowned author, Soraya Chemaly, explore the misconceptions and dangers of resilience, highlighting the lack of social care and the value of care in society, highlighter in her new book: The Resilience Myth: New Thinking on Grit, Strength, and Growth After Trauma. Some of the key points include: - Resilience can be misconstrued and work against us when there is a lack of social care and value for care in society. - The concept of resilience has become detached from science and has proliferated as an ideology. - The science of resilience has biases and limitations, particularly in relation to gender and vulnerable populations. - Healing and resilience are not solely individual endeavors, but require community, relationships, and reflection. - Traditional notions of masculinity can hinder resilience and adaptability to change. - The idea of bouncing back to a pre-trauma state is a myth, and healing involves assimilating experiences and evolving as individuals. Rigid notions of masculinity can be harmful and lead to a lack of resilience. - Marginalized communities may overcompensate in one area to compensate for marginalization in another. - Cultivating an embodied awareness of our environments is important for resilience. - Resilience should be viewed from a relational perspective, emphasizing interconnectedness. -- Soraya Chemaly is a renowned journalist, activist, and author. Her work focuses on the words we use, the images we make, and how to act to build a better world. Her work will make you think, and give you plenty to talk about! Get Soraya Chemaly's books here: The Resilience Myth: New Thinking on Grit, Strength, and Growth After Trauma Rage Becomes Her: The Power of Women's Anger Follow Soraya Chemaly: Instagram: @rageandresilience Website: https://www.sorayachemaly.com ____________________________________

Award winning writer, journalist and activist Soraya Chemaly discusses why we need to shift our view of “resilience” from individualised strength towards collective care, and offers ways you can feel resilient in the face of adversity. WANT MORE FROM SORAYA? For more on Soraya's book The Resilience Myth (Simon & Schuster, $34.99) see here. You can find her @ragebecomesher or via her site here.  WANT MORE BODY + SOUL?  Online: Head to bodyandsoul.com.au for your daily digital dose of health and wellness. On social: Via Instagram at @bodyandsoul_au or Facebook. Or, TikTok here. Got an idea for an episode? DM host Felicity Harley on Instagram @felicityharley.  In print: Each Sunday, grab Body+Soul inside The Sunday Telegraph (NSW), the Sunday Herald Sun (Victoria), The Sunday Mail (Queensland), Sunday Mail (SA) and Sunday Tasmanian (Tasmania). See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Award winning writer, journalist and activist Soraya Chemaly argues for a paradigm shift in how we view resilience, emphasising the importance of collective healing over individual strength. WANT MORE FROM SORAYA? To hear today's full interview, where she talks about the importance of cognitive flexibility...search for Extra Healthy-ish wherever you get your pods. For more on Soraya's book The Resilience Myth (Simon & Schuster, $34.99) see here. You can find her @ragebecomesher or via her site here.  WANT MORE BODY + SOUL?  Online: Head to bodyandsoul.com.au for your daily digital dose of health and wellness. On social: Via Instagram at @bodyandsoul_au or Facebook. Or, TikTok here. Got an idea for an episode? DM host Felicity Harley on Instagram @felicityharley.  In print: Each Sunday, grab Body+Soul inside The Sunday Telegraph (NSW), the Sunday Herald Sun (Victoria), The Sunday Mail (Queensland), Sunday Mail (SA) and Sunday Tasmanian (Tasmania). See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Award-winning activist and author, Soraya Chemaly, discusses her new book, The Resilience Myth: New Thinking on Grit, Strength, and Growth After Trauma, and dismantles long-standing notions about what resilience is, while challenging us to rethink how we employ resilience as a source of grit and strength both within ourselves and for others. From this Episode: The Resilience Myth: New Thinking on Grit, Strength, and Growth After Trauma Rage Becomes Her: The Power of Women's Anger Listen to All Electorette Episodes https://www.electorette.com/podcast Support the Electorette Rate & Review on iTunes: https://apple.co/2GsfQj4 Also, if you enjoy the Electorette, please subscribe and leave a 5-star review on iTunes. And please spread the word by telling your friends, family, and colleagues about The Electorette! WANT MORE ELECTORETTE? Follow the Electorette on social media. Electorette Facebook Electorette Instagram Electorette Twitter Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Writer and activist Soraya Chemaly offered an alternative view of grit and resilience today in a world of overlapping crises. She was interviewed by University of Pennsylvania Positive Psychology Center Instructor Judith Saltzberg. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Writer and activist Soraya Chemaly offered an alternative view of grit and resilience today in a world of overlapping crises. She was interviewed by University of Pennsylvania Positive Psychology Center Instructor Judith Saltzberg. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Soraya Chemaly heard her entire life that being resilient is a positive trait. But lately, she's been questioning the toll resiliency actually takes on us.  Soraya Chemaly is the author of The Resilience Myth: New thinking on grit, strength, and growth after trauma. You can hear more about her thoughts on resilience in her episode of Terrible, Thanks For Asking.  _ If you have anxiety, depression or any sense of the world around you, you know that not *everything* is going to be okay. In fact, many things aren't okay and never will be! But instead of falling into the pit of despair, we're bringing you a little OK for your day. Every weekday, we'll bring you one okay thing to help you start, end or endure your day with the opposite of a doom scroll. Created and hosted by Nora McInerny. - Find Nora's weekly newsletter here! Also, check out Nora on YouTube. _ “It's Going To Be OK” is brought to you by The Hartford. The Hartford is a leading insurance provider that connects people and technology for better employee benefits.  Learn more at www.thehartford.com/benefits.  _ Share your OK thing at 612.568.4441 or by emailing a note or voice memo to IGTBO@feelingsand.co. Start your message with “I'm (name) and it's going to be okay.”  _ The IGTBO team is Nora McInerny, Claire McInerny, Marcel Malekebu, Amanda Romani and Grace Barry. _ The transcript for this episode can be found here. Find all our shows and our store at www.feelingsand.co. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Conventional wisdom tells us the people who are able to overcome challenges and maintain optimism in the face of adversity are mentally tough and have a special superpower; resilience. Those ideas are sexist and wrong says writer, journalist and activist Soraya Chemaly.

Years ago, when Nora was in the worst phase of her life (dead husband, dead dad, lost pregnancy) she heard a lot of people describe her as resilient. Those people meant it as a compliment, but to Nora it didn't feel that way. She was tired, grieving, and lost so much in her life- the “resiliency” people saw was often just…the privilege she had to survive it.  So when Nora got the new book, The Resiliency Myth by Soraya Chemaly, she devoured it. In this episode, Nora and Soraya talk about different ways to think about resiliency and how celebrating it can be a little toxic.  We are still on hiatus! But this episode in the main feed was brought to you by our TTFA Premium subscribers. Since the hiatus, we've been producing two episodes a month for people who support us on Patreon and Apple Premium (join in your Apple podcast app). If you want more TTFA, consider joining us on one of those platforms.  _ Check out Nora on YouTube! __ Find all our shows and our store at feelingsand.co. — Find TTFA on social: TTFA on Instagram | TTFA on Facebook Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

“This is the richness of the traditional wife explosion, right? There's this simple idea that you get to choose. Now you're choosing to emulate a situation that's a fiction in that those women didn't choose anything. They had to dress like that. They had to live like that. They had to be nice to the men like that, because they had no bank accounts. They had no cars. They had no licenses. They had no income. They had no security. So, don't equate these two things because you're just kind of living a dignified version of something that was pretty egregiously harmful, you know. And it's the difference, I think, in knowing that you have an option.” So says Soraya Chemaly, an award-winning writer, journalist and activist whose work has been at the center of mine. Her now-classic, Rage Becomes Her: The Power of Women's Anger lit me on fire—not only for the deftness of her arguments but also because she is a meticulous researcher. What she gave air to in the pages of that book blew me away. She figures prominently in the endnotes of On Our Best Behavior. Her new book, The Resilience Myth: New Thinking on Grit, Strength, and Growth After Trauma, follows a similar path. Soraya takes something we've been served as an ideal—develop resilience—and flips it on its head, both widening and undermining this definition. She challenges our cultural myths about this concept and urges us all to shift and expand our perspective on the trait, moving from prioritizing the role of the individual to overcome and conquer to focusing on what's really at work, which is collective care and connections with our communities. As she proves in these pages, resilience is always relational.  MORE FROM SORAYA CHEMALY: The Resilience Myth: New Thinking on Grit, Strength, and Growth After Trauma Rage Becomes Her: The Power of Women's Anger Follow Soraya on Instagram Soraya's Website To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

What do we lose when we're not allowed to be angry?    In a lot of ways, anger is more taboo than grief. They're deeply related, as you'll hear in this two-part episode: both grief and anger are considered “negative” emotions, things you shouldn't feel, and definitely shouldn't express in polite company. But what if reclaiming our anger was the way to build the world - and the relationships - we most want? All of that and more with the best selling author of Rage Becomes Her, Soraya Chemaly.    In this two-part episode we cover:    What is the right amount of anger? Why deciding some emotions are “good” and some are “bad” isn't really helpful  What would “anger competence” or “anger literacy” look like? (and why would you want that??)  Why Soraya says “most grief is ambiguous grief” How the old split between the head (logic) and the heart (emotion) cuts us off from what we most want Finding your best community by embracing your anger   We're re-releasing some of our favorite episodes from the first 3 seasons. This episode was originally recorded in 2023.   Looking for a creative exploration of grief? Check out the best selling Writing Your Grief course here.   About our guest: Soraya Chemaly is an award-winning writer and activist whose work focuses on the role of gender in culture, politics, religion, and media. She is the Director of the Women's Media Center Speech Project and an advocate for women's freedom of expression and expanded civic and political engagement. A prolific writer and speaker, her articles appear in TIME, The Verge, The Guardian, The Nation, HuffPost, and The Atlantic. Find her best selling book, Rage Becomes Her at sorayachemaly.com. Follow her on social media @sorayachemaly   About Megan:  Psychotherapist Megan Devine is one of today's leading experts on grief, from life-altering losses to the everyday grief that we don't call grief. Get the best-selling book on grief in over a decade, It's Ok that You're Not OK, wherever you get books. Find Megan @refugeingrief   Additional Resources: We mention Pauline Boss in this episode. If you're not familiar with her excellent work on ambiguous loss (a term she coined in the 1970s), check out her website at ambiguousloss.com   To read more about anger and how it relates to grief, check out It's OK that You're Not OK.   If you want to explore your anger with creative prompts and exercises, check out the guided journal for grief, How to Carry What Can't Be Fixed.    Want to talk with Megan directly? Join our patreon community for live monthly Q&A grief clinics: your questions, answered. Want to speak to her privately? Apply for a 1:1 grief consultation here.    Books and resources may contain affiliate links.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

What do we lose when we're not allowed to be angry?    In a lot of ways, anger is more taboo than grief. They're deeply related, as you'll hear in this two-part episode: both grief and anger are considered “negative” emotions, things you shouldn't feel, and definitely shouldn't express in polite company. But what if reclaiming our anger was the way to build the world - and the relationships - we most want? All of that and more with the best selling author of Rage Becomes Her, Soraya Chemaly.    In this two-part episode we cover:    What is the right amount of anger? Why deciding some emotions are “good” and some are “bad” isn't really helpful  What would “anger competence” or “anger literacy” look like? (and why would you want that??)  Why Soraya says “most grief is ambiguous grief” How the old split between the head (logic) and the heart (emotion) cuts us off from what we most want Finding your best community by embracing your anger   We're re-releasing some of our favorite episodes from the first 3 seasons. This episode was originally recorded in 2023.   Looking for a creative exploration of grief? Check out the best selling Writing Your Grief course here.   About our guest: Soraya Chemaly is an award-winning writer and activist whose work focuses on the role of gender in culture, politics, religion, and media. She is the Director of the Women's Media Center Speech Project and an advocate for women's freedom of expression and expanded civic and political engagement. A prolific writer and speaker, her articles appear in TIME, The Verge, The Guardian, The Nation, HuffPost, and The Atlantic. Find her best selling book, Rage Becomes Her at sorayachemaly.com. Follow her on social media @sorayachemaly   About Megan:  Psychotherapist Megan Devine is one of today's leading experts on grief, from life-altering losses to the everyday grief that we don't call grief. Get the best-selling book on grief in over a decade, It's Ok that You're Not OK, wherever you get books. Find Megan @refugeingrief   Additional Resources: We mention Pauline Boss in this episode. If you're not familiar with her excellent work on ambiguous loss (a term she coined in the 1970s), check out her website at ambiguousloss.com   To read more about anger and how it relates to grief, check out It's OK that You're Not OK.   If you want to explore your anger with creative prompts and exercises, check out the guided journal for grief, How to Carry What Can't Be Fixed.    Want to talk with Megan directly? Join our patreon community for live monthly Q&A grief clinics: your questions, answered. Want to speak to her privately? Apply for a 1:1 grief consultation here.    Books and resources may contain affiliate links.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Robin on Haiti's uniqueness in the world, and “Whatever happened to CEDAW?!” Guest: author Soraya Chemaly and The Resilience Myth.

Writer Ijeoma Oluo looked at how everyday Americans are fighting oppression in our systems and institutions to bring about change in communities. She was interviewed by author and activist Soraya Chemaly. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Writer Ijeoma Oluo looked at how everyday Americans are fighting oppression in our systems and institutions to bring about change in communities. She was interviewed by author and activist Soraya Chemaly. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Ever since Avery became the host of Girlboss Radio, she's had one dream guest at the top of her wishlist. And that person is Soraya Chemaly. Soraya is an award-winning writer and activist, best known for her 2018 book Rage Becomes Her: The Power of Women's Anger. Avery refers to it "The Bible" and has recommended it (and even gifted it) to hundreds of people. In this episode, Avery and Soraya talk about why, as women, we're conditioned to minimize our anger (and replace it with words like “tired” or “stressed”), and how we can all harness the power of rage for the greater good. Get your FREE sample pack of LMNT electrolyte drink mix with any purchase at DrinkLMNT.com/GIRLBOSS. New episodes of Girlboss Radio drop every Tuesday. Never miss an episode by subscribing here: girlboss.com/pages/girlboss-radio-subscribe. Girlboss' very first course, Spark Your Career Renaissance, will help you unlock your differentiator to go from stuck to success. Learn more and enroll at course.girlboss.com/courses/spark-your-career-renaissance. Sign up for Girlboss Daily, our must-read morning newsletter, at girlboss.com/newsletter. You'll get A+ career advice, dream job postings, free coffee every Friday and a few emojis (because we're fun like that), delivered right to your inbox. Looking for your next dream employee? Post your open role on our Girlboss Job Board at jobs.girlboss.com.

What is your relationship with your anger? How much of your stress and exhaustion is fueled by repressed anger and rage? And how do you respond when those around you express anger?Our experiences early in life, experiences at our places of work and education, and our conditioning from culture all play significant roles in how we view and respond to anger and rage within and around us. And for women–especially Black and brown women–we learn our anger and rage come off as unbecoming and distancing, which can be the death of a promotion, a deal, or financial advancement.Many experience firsthand the negative impact of expressing our anger, which can bring about a dangerous backlash that can impact not only our well-being but also our safety. But when we shift the focus from seeing anger solely as dangerous or something to be feared and instead befriend and learn from it, so much changes in how we lead and do life.Today's guest wrote a beautifully written and well-cited book documenting the impact of suppressed rage in women on themselves and those around them. Soraya Chemaly is an award-winning author and activist. She writes and speaks frequently on topics related to gender norms, inclusivity, social justice, free speech, sexualized violence, and technology. She is the former Executive Director of The Representation Project and Director and Co-Founder of the Women's Media Center Speech Project, and also the author of Rage Becomes Her: The Power of Women's Anger, which was recognized as a Best Book of 2018 by the Washington Post, Fast Company, Psychology Today, and NPR.  Listen to the full episode to hear:How suppressing anger harms more than just the individualHow rage is justified and tolerated differently for men and womenHow niceness and a focus on the feelings of others is socialized into girls from an early ageThe anger that hides underneath stress, disappointment, and other ways women minimize their angerThe long-term impacts and risks of suppressed anger on physical and mental healthLearn more about Soraya Chemaly:WebsiteInstagram: @sorayachemaly​​Rage Becomes Her: The Power of Women's AngerLearn more about Rebecca:rebeccaching.comWork With RebeccaSign up for the weekly Unburdened Leader EmailResources:Braving the Wilderness, Brené BrownReproduction, Louisa HallDo You Know Me By Heart, Cameron AveryJames Blake - Say What You WillImogen Heap - Hide And Seek

Soraya Chemaly who is an award-winning author, media critic, and activist who writes and speaks frequently about women's rights, gender, inclusivity, violence, and free speech. The former Executive Director of The Representation Project and Director and co-founder of the Women's Media Center Speech Project, she has long been committed to expanding women's civic and political participation. Her work appears in The Atlantic, TIME magazine, Rolling Stone, The Washington Post and various other outlets, and her activism has been featured widely in media, documentaries, books, and academic research. Soraya is also the author of Rage Becomes Her: The Power of Women's Anger and a contributor to several anthologies, including Free Speech in the Digital Age and Believe Me: How Trusting Women Can Change The World. Her efforts have been recognized by the Association for Education in Journalism and Mass Communication, the Women's Institute for Freedom of the Press's Women, and the Newhouse School for Public Communication. She was recently awarded a Wikipedia Distinguished Service Award and Soraya currently serves on the national board of the Women's Media Center and Equimundo and is a former or current board and advisory member of Emerge America, Women, Action and The Media, the Center for Democracy and Technology, FORCE: Upsetting Rape Culture, and VIDA.   Visit Soraya Chemaly's Website: www.SorayaChemaly.com Book - Rage Becomes Her: The Power of Women's Anger Follow Soraya on: Instagram  __________________________________ Subscribe to Dr. Lotte's Newsletter Visit Dr. Lotte's Website Stay Connected on Social Media, follow Dr. Lotte on Instagram & Facebook    

Soraya Chemaly is the feminist voice of our time. Her extraordinary capacity to see the whole picture with unrivalled clarity serves as an inspiration to us all. Soraya's authenticity and bravery are beacons of light in a turbulent global situation, and her book Rage Becomes Her: The Power of Women's Anger, is our bible at WAM HQ.  This conversation was recorded on 6th October 2023 and covers a range of topics from how men react to women's anger and the power that anger has to drive change. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Anger feels like the baddie of emotions. Many of us deal with anger by numbing it, or pushing it down, hoping it'll magically disappear. But it's still there, trapped in the body. Instead of stuffing it down, let's talk about anger, and learn a more effective way of processing it. Today's guest is Dr Caroline Boyd, Chartered Clinical Psychologist and author who is frequently quoted in the press on women's rage and maternal anger. We focus more generally on anger in this conversation, whether or not you're a mom (or even a parent). You'll learn how our complex relationship to anger starts early. You'll learn practical ways to manage those ‘flip your lid' moments, and why you're encouraged to start turning TOWARDS your anger, instead of pushing it away (counterintuitive and brilliant!) Join us.     Links: Dr Caroline Boyd's website. Caroline's Workshop Caroline on Instagram. Dr Dan Siegel explains flipping your lid. Guardian article (including Rage Rooms). Soraya Chemaly's TED talk.

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Science journalist Angela Saini explored the origins of patriarchy and how it spread to societies around the world. She was interviewed by author and Women's Media Center director Soraya Chemaly. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Send us a Text Message.What an episode.Katherine is an anti-diet culture dietitian and Founder and CEO of Brave Space Nutrition.  Her areas of focus are perfectionists, members of the LGBTQIA+ community, perimenopause and menopause, eating disorders, disordered eating, body image and women's health! WOW!She is also a TikTok and Youtube sensation and wholeheartedly believes NOOM is a diet.  (Sorry, not sorry NOOM).We chat about navigating our bodies changing as we age, especially after an eating disorder.  We chat about ways to heal our body image and the importance of self-compassion when it comes to how we feel about our bodies and how we eat and move.  Should we also embrace our rage?  Should we get angry about being made to feel less than or that our bodies need fixing?(Katherine references the book 'Rage Becomes Her' by Soraya Chemaly. Available to buy here.)Katherine speaks to the origin of diet culture, with its roots in rascism, misogyny, ableism and with its prevalence in today's society. Can we really make a difference or are we just destined to be swimming upstream for the rest of our lives?Tune in.  It's a fantastic episode.You can contact Katherine via:Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/bravespacenutrition/Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@KatherineMetzelaarWebsite: https://www.bravespacenutrition.com/  Are you feeling stuck in the 'earn and burn' cycle with your exercise routine, or as summer approaches, are you feeling self-conscious about wearing a swimsuit on the beach? Maybe you just want to stop worrying so much about food or how your body looks.You are not alone and your body is NOT the problem Please reach out if you would like some support. We both have limited slots for Intuitive Eating Coaching, so get in touch with Christine or with Ela.AND if you enjoyed this episode, please share and follow the 'Find Your Strong podcast' and if you have time, write us a short review. It would honestly mean the world. Love to you all, Ela & Christine x

What do we lose when we're not allowed to be angry?    In a lot of ways, anger is more taboo than grief. They're deeply related, as you'll hear in this two-part episode: both grief and anger are considered “negative” emotions, things you shouldn't feel, and definitely shouldn't express in polite company. But what if reclaiming our anger was the way to build the world - and the relationships - we most want? All of that and more with the best selling author of Rage Becomes Her, Soraya Chemaly.    In this two-part episode we cover:    What is the right amount of anger? Why deciding some emotions are “good” and some are “bad” isn't really helpful  What would “anger competence” or “anger literacy” look like? (and why would you want that??)  Why Soraya says “most grief is ambiguous grief” Is anger the most social emotion? How the old split between the head (logic) and the heart (emotion) cuts us off from what we most want Finding your best community by embracing your anger   About our guest:   Soraya Chemaly is an award-winning writer and activist whose work focuses on the role of gender in culture, politics, religion, and media. She is the Director of the Women's Media Center Speech Project and an advocate for women's freedom of expression and expanded civic and political engagement. A prolific writer and speaker, her articles appear in Time, the Verge, The Guardian, The Nation, HuffPost, and The Atlantic. Find her best selling book, Rage Becomes Her at sorayachemaly.com. Follow her on social media @sorayachemaly Additional resources   We mention Pauline Boss in this episode. If you're not familiar with her excellent work on ambiguous loss (a term she coined in the 1970s), check out her website at ambiguousloss.com   To read more about anger and how it relates to grief, check out It's OK that You're Not OK. If you want to explore your anger with creative prompts and exercises, check out the guided journal for grief, How to Carry What Can't Be Fixed.    Get in touch: Thanks for listening to this week's episode of Here After with Megan Devine. Tune in, subscribe, leave a review, send in your questions, and share the show with everyone you know. Together, we can make things better, even when they can't be made right.   For more information, including clinical training and consulting, visit us at www.Megandevine.co   For grief support & education, follow us at @refugeingrief on IG, FB, TW, and @hereafterpod on TT   Check out Megan's best-selling books - It's Okay That You're Not Okay and How to Carry What Can't Be FixedSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

What do we lose when we're not allowed to be angry?    In a lot of ways, anger is more taboo than grief. They're deeply related, as you'll hear in this two-part episode: both grief and anger are considered “negative” emotions, things you shouldn't feel, and definitely shouldn't express in polite company. But what if reclaiming our anger was the way to build the world - and the relationships - we most want? All of that and more with the best selling author of Rage Becomes Her, Soraya Chemaly.    In this two-part episode we cover:    What is the right amount of anger? Why deciding some emotions are “good” and some are “bad” isn't really helpful  What would “anger competence” or “anger literacy” look like? (and why would you want that??)  Why Soraya says “most grief is ambiguous grief” Is anger the most social emotion? How the old split between the head (logic) and the heart (emotion) cuts us off from what we most want Finding your best community by embracing your anger   About our guest:   Soraya Chemaly is an award-winning writer and activist whose work focuses on the role of gender in culture, politics, religion, and media. She is the Director of the Women's Media Center Speech Project and an advocate for women's freedom of expression and expanded civic and political engagement. A prolific writer and speaker, her articles appear in Time, the Verge, The Guardian, The Nation, HuffPost, and The Atlantic. Find her best selling book, Rage Becomes Her at sorayachemaly.com. Follow her on social media @sorayachemaly Additional resources   We mention Pauline Boss in this episode. If you're not familiar with her excellent work on ambiguous loss (a term she coined in the 1970s), check out her website at ambiguousloss.com   To read more about anger and how it relates to grief, check out It's OK that You're Not OK. If you want to explore your anger with creative prompts and exercises, check out the guided journal for grief, How to Carry What Can't Be Fixed.    Get in touch:   Thanks for listening to this week's episode of Here After with Megan Devine. Tune in, subscribe, leave a review, send in your questions, and share the show with everyone you know. Together, we can make things better, even when they can't be made right.    Have a question, comment, or a topic you'd like us to cover? call us at (323) 643-3768 or visit megandevine.co   For more information, including clinical training and consulting, visit us at www.Megandevine.co   For grief support & education, follow us at @refugeingrief on IG, FB, TW, and @hereafterpod on TT   Check out Megan's best-selling books - It's Okay That You're Not Okay and How to Carry What Can't Be FixedSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Best-selling Author of Rage Becomes Her: The Power of Women's Anger, Soraya Chemaly, joins the podcast to discuss anger, rage and how a new understanding of anger and rage can serve us in our leadership, our life and our impact.In this episode, we explore anger competence and understanding how anger and rage impact us personally and collectively.  And how to use it instead of defaulting back to our assumption that rage and anger are emotions to be avoided, stamped out or punished. Visit Soraya's website.Buy Soraya's book, Rage Becomes Her: The Power of Women's AngerCheck out all things Dia Bondi here.

Soraya Chemaly is an award-winning author, activist and former Executive Director of the Representation Project and Director and Co-Founder of the Women's Media Center Speech Project. She has long been committed to expanding women's civic and political participation.  She is the author Rage Becomes Her: The Power of Women's Anger and the recipient of the 2022 Passionistas Persist Trailblazer Award. Learn nore about Soraya Chemaly. Learn more about The Passionistas Project. FULL TRANSCRIPT:  Passionistas: Hi, we're sisters Amy and Nancy Harrington. We founded the Passionistas Project to tell the stories of women who are following their passions and fighting for equality for all. The more we spoke with women for our podcast, subscription box and the annual Power of Passionistas summit, the more we saw a common trait in all of them. They are unstoppable. Whether they choose to use their voices to start a women-owned brand or fight for the rights of the marginalized, we found that all Passionistas are resilient, compassionate and persistent. Each year, we honor women who embody these qualities by presenting the Passionista Persist Awards. This episode of the podcast is an interview with one of the 2022 recipients. Our next award this evening is the Passionista Persist Trailblazer Award. The definition of Trailblazer is a pioneer, an innovator, a person who makes a new track through wild. Tonight's recipient is an activist and author who is pushing boundaries for women daily in this wild country we live in. The award is being presented by Dr. Melissa Bird, a feminist, author, healer and coach. Melissa's purpose in this world is to teach women how to step into their truth and quit playing small. Melissa: I am so pleased to be presenting the 2022 Passionist Persist Trailblazer Award to my amazing, inspiring friend Soraya Chemaly. Soraya is an award-winning author, activist and is the former Executive Director of the Representation Project and Director and Co-Founder of the Women's Media Center Speech Project. And she has long been committed to expanding women's civic and political participation. One of the things I love and adore about Soraya is that she is the author of one of my most favorite books, Rage Becomes Her: The Power of Women's Anger. And I do not think it is any coincidence that on this day of all days, on this year of all years, I get the privilege and the honor of presenting Soraya with this incredible Trailblazer Award. So, Soraya, thank you so much for joining me today to receive this amazing, beautiful, awesome, well-deserved award because you are certainly blazing many trails in my life and the lives of so many of us. Soraya: Thank you so much, Missy and thank you to, The Passionistas Project. I am really, genuinely so honored. It has been a difficult year. It's been a difficult decade, actually, and honestly, it's just nice to know that organizations like yours are thinking about the work that people are doing, that requires this kind of persistence, which doesn't necessarily mean the same thing as hope. But really and truly, I'm genuinely very, very honored and delighted to be able to have this chance to have a conversation with you again and want to just say thank you very much. Melissa: Oh, you are so welcome. God works in very fascinating ways and the fact that you and I are here together. After the Supreme Court has released so many devastating decisions just this week, like in the last literally six days. Yes, I think it is. Um, I think it is awesome actually, that you and I are together at this moment talking about trailblazing, right? And, and about how are we moving forward. Um, as part of the Passionistas Project, as part of the work, um, that Amy and Nancy have brought together and culminated so that so many people can have a platform for change and a platform for blazing trails. And I think that, you know, you and I in our professional work, Soraya, we work with so many organizations and so many people who are trying. The thing that I love about the Passionistas Project is they are doing in such an authentically beautiful way. And so the first thing I really want to talk with you about today is about the Power of the Passionista and this mission of bringing all these women together from literally all over the world to talk about making change with diversity, equity and inclusion. Truly doing it this time. Like the lineup just blows my mind every time I think about it. So what does the Power of Passionista mean to you? Soraya: When I first heard Passionista, my response was a, a little bit viscerally to think, oh, hold on. That's a word that I personally have heard that you have heard that many of us have heard. That's used dismissively. You're so passionate about that project you work on. Right. As though some of the issues that we are fighting against. Um, our pet projects that we do in our spare time because it makes us feel happy, you know, and so I actually had that initial response, but what I really came to understand and think about was the fact that there's no reason to reject the word passionate or the idea of what it implies and clearly means in this context. I mean, these are women from all over the world who are dedicating their lives to making change often in situations of. Grave, danger of risk, um, of political, uh, violence. Uh, increasingly we know this is the case. Increasingly, we know that the people at the forefront of so many movements, environmental movements, climate change, indigenous rights, uh, apportion, reproductive rights, racial justice, it's over and over and over. Women, black women, queer women, trans women, women who are just pushed farther and farther and farther into the margins. And so I think it's really important to understand what it means. Honestly, the word kind of to me lies at the nexus of the personal and political that some people have the luxury to think are. Right? We know that that's a decades old expression from the feminist world, that the personal is political. But a lot of people really still benefit from separating those two things. And, and, you know, we gain nothing by pretending that they're separated. Um, and I actually think the word Passionista, um, makes people think about that if they care to. Melissa: I think we have to have passion to keep moving on. If we remain passionate about the things that deeply impact our lives and our world and the world of other people, particularly all of the women you just mentioned, we start talking about disabled women, women who are engaging in decolonizing work. We start talking about rebellious women, women who are trying to get educated and disrupting the education system. When we think about people being the ones who are potentially gonna get us through. Then we have to understand passion. Because without passion, the drive in hopeless moments becomes diminished. And so what are you the most passionate about? Soraya: When the Dobbs decision came down, I think like a lot of people, I burst out crying. And the thing is that you've been doing this work, I've been doing this work for, oh, it feels like decades, right? Yeah. Like literally, there was no surprise in this at all. There was just profound loss and disappointment and sadness and rage. That's how I felt, you know? And it was just so eviscerating actually, because I think. If you have been on this side of this fight, seriously, you understand what just happened, what we just lost, what it represents. And that's not to diminish other losses at all, but it's such a turning point to have the right taken away. But it is a really critical point and a great unraveling. Yes and yes. Yes, yes. I'm so glad you called it a great unraveling because I think that is profoundly important for people to understand as we're thinking about, I mean, trailblazing the world as we know it will fall apart. And we're seeing it in little tiny anecdotes. Mm-hmm. you know, doctors who have a woman come into their emergency room at 11:30 PM who with an ectopic pregnancy, that's about to blow, but they've gotta get on the phone with the attorney. Yeah. And make sure they can do the procedure. Cuz her life isn't totally at risk yet, but it will be soon. Right. I, I'm just like, maybe now you understand that the single what the single issues. Not issue. It was always oversimplified into this idea of the act of abortion. And that is never what any of us was talking about, you know? And so I think the thing you were saying, what am I most passionate about? And I was kind of winnowed down into this nub of real despair. You know, just that feeling that you get, which is hopelessness. But I will admit that that was swamp. Pretty quickly by my rage. Yeah. And I think by many people who, many people had this experience of feeling this justifiable rage, but in fact, you can't let that rage hurt you. This is the point, right? If the, if the rage you feel is causing you dangerous stress or causing you to hurt yourself in other ways or. To, um, destroy relationships that are important, that that's not a functioning tool. And, and so I'm quite passionate in this moment about acknowledging anger, acknowledging the rage of the moment, and also appreciating that while it's not the conventional, socially acceptable, um, method of displaying. Anger is literally one of the most hopeful emotions because if you can maintain your anger, which is different from resentment, right? Like I feel resentment when I look back at people's decades of work that feels dismissed and lost, I'm looking back, right? That's different from a rage, which is a feeling that things can and must change. Because you don't feel rage. If you feel really genuinely hopeless. What you feel is sadness and despair and depression, and that's paralyzing. And it's okay if people feel that way because in fact, this is a sad, depressing, paralyzing moment. But I would just say that I also believe that, again, it's not, not to say embrace a rage and an anger that are destructive. It's not at all what I mean, but acknowledge that the rage and the anger are justifiable and that they need expression and that no matter what, they are hopeful. They are fundamentally hopeful. We think that in order to make change, we have to, we have to set aside anger and. And yes, what I love to refer to as Righteous Fury. Mm-hmm.  in order to disrupt systems and make a difference. And I remember so many times when I was lobbying at the Capitol in Utah for a Planned Parenthood, I would just be furious. I can't play poker, I can't keep any emotion off my damn face. And I would be so livid and then I would like take this breath and go, what has to be done? How can I communicate what is necessary to these people to help things move forward? Because I had to focus on, not me, but the thousands and thousands of people that are gonna be impacted by that. Those pieces of legislation, either that I was trying to push forward or that other people were trying to push forward. And as soon as I channeled that rage and moved it into, everything changed as long as I wasn't screaming and yelling and huffing at, at directly at human beings and being abusive and confrontational, I still got rage. I still had all the rage. Mm-hmm.  And I channeled it. Melissa: And I'm curious, when you talk about rage, what are the things that you really wanna help people who are part of this Passionistas summit understand. Soraya: Taking our rage and using it to blaze wherever we're going. There are a few things that really still strike me. Um, it's been three years since the book was published and, um, you know, it, it's one of these books I think that has a very long tale because in fact there is an evergreen quality to these ideas. Mm-hmm, you know, and, and we wanna underst. Emotionality and we in particular, I think wanna understand the role it plays in our cognition because if you are a woman, or if I'm identifying, you know, how quickly and easily people dismiss you, if you express anger. Which is why so many of us try not to show anger, feel anger, display anger. We've grown up being punished for it or, um, mocked for it. You know, that's the number one worry women have. It's not that someone's gonna be violent, it is that they will be mocked for expressing anger, which is an expression of need or an assertion of will. Right. And we're, we're, we're not supposed to have either of those, those things. Mm-hmm. , but I, I think. , there are a few things. One is to be a trailblazer and to use your passionate feelings and beliefs. Doesn't require that you take on the whole world all at once or have an institution or a structure. You know, the whole fact of trailblazing is that you find a new way. You find a way that makes sense to you, and then , most times it also makes sense to other people, but they just either didn't do it or didn't think of it or didn't have the time, but are so appreciative of the fact that you might do it. And so for some people that might be organizing a local choir to resist peacefully. In a certain way, right. To other people it may be writing legislation to other people. It may be mobilizing, um, transportation, who knows what it is, right? But I think it's really important to not feel paralyzed by the idea that there's a way to trail blades. The point is it's risky. Yes. You, you, you have to take the. People may call you stupid or you know, any number of terrible, terrible names, which 100% will happen. Okay. How you know you're on the trail. That's how you know you're on the trail. So you really have to, you have to really fundamentally be okay with people not liking you. That's the other lesson that really strikes me about being passionate and being angry as part of. We are so, so expected and socialized to be likable and to put others first, and not make other people uncomfortable. Trailblazing always makes people uncomfortable. It's okay. We need more people to be very profoundly uncomfortable. I'm thinking about my own moments where friends have come to me, or clients have come to me, or organizations have come to me and said, you know, I have this. I really wanna do it, and I don't think I should because if I do A, B or C is gonna happen, people won't like me. I'll lose my family, I'll lose my friends, which is what stops us from doing our core, what we are here to do. Right? Right. It stops us from living at our purpose. Oftentimes what I hear from people is that I must be really unique for writing the, the very first bill I ever wrote on my dining room table when I was getting my master's degree. Thinking about what propels you and the people that you know, all these women who are here as part of the summit, all these people that are connecting with all of us who are involved as either award recipients or speakers. What do you want people to know? You know, there's gonna be a lot of noise, there's gonna be a lot of us versus them. There's gonna be a lot of polarization cuz there's nothing. This country more loves more than polarizing each other. Melissa: What do you think people really need to hear about that polarization so they don't get distracted by all that noise? Soraya: Well, it's so hard, you know, because in fact the stage at which we're in the polarization is intimate, right? We're not talking about someone who lives in another state who feels differently. We may be talking as women about the person who's sleeping next to us in bed. That is a very difficult situation that millions and millions and millions of people find themselves in. The polarization is very gendered and very raced. The political polarization. Mm-hmm. But at the same time, we all know there are a lot of liberal progressive men and a lot of extremely conservative women. Yes. So, you know, I don't wanna suggest that it's straight down the line that fathers and daughters or, you know, so I, I think it's important to acknowledge. The intimacy of the issues that we're talking about and it demands of us different tactics and techniques. It demands, honestly, and this is what, this is why I gravitated towards anger as a way of shedding light on some of these issues of inequal. The inequalities are deeply intimate, right? And so the thing about anger in an intimate setting, whether it's a family setting, a religious community, which is almost always patriarchal, right? Our main religious faiths are all mainstream patriarchal, um, regardless of the community you're in. The thing about disdain, anger is that it, it erases the, even the idea of reciprocity, right? So if you're angry at people, you know, and you don't tell them who exactly are you protecting or hurting. Maybe you're protecting yourself because it's too big a risk to think, I love these people. I have dedicated my life to them. I've taken care of them, or I do it every day. But what if they don't return that care? Right? What if I say I'm very angry? This is very important to me, I need you to support me. And what they do is get angry at me for the way I express myself or laugh at me and diminish my concerns. Those are legitimate concerns because they happen every day. And so I just think we need to acknowledge the risk because in fact, the hard part about thinking about reciprocity is acknowledging. There are power. There's power at play, social power at play in our institutions at every level. So yes, in the government, but in our schools and in our places of worship and at our dining room tables, I always say, if you can't practice a hard conversation at home among the people that in that you trust and who in theory love you and support you, how are you supposed to do outside. I think that's really the thing that keeps people from engaging. Melissa: The topic of this conference is diversity, equity and inclusion, right? And I think that right there, Soraya is why people don't really authentically dig into do I work because I agree. Because if you can't have that conversation at home, right? Soraya: How in the hell are you supposed to have it in a corporation with thousands of employees. So often the onus of these conversations falls on the minority people who are most negatively affected. When we think about intersectionality, it's very often the case that you think about black women, um, or trans women, right? Yeah. And what gets erased is the intersectional nature or relevance or political. Identity of a white straight man, for example, or of a, a, a white straight woman. That identity, because it's so often conflated with a normal person mm-hmm.  as opposed to, and, and a person whose identity doesn't matter. That gets very complicated. And so when you have to do the hard work of talking about those identities, It feels as we know, like an attack on people. That's, that's where the term white fragility comes from, you know? And so imagine being, uh, a woman at the dinner table who wants to talk to her children about whiteness, and that's not really appreciated by her spouse. How is she also gonna talk about male or straightness, right? If she has a child, if she like. It's a very complicated, and I think the reason it gets so complicated is because these conversations are threats to identity. You know, they're threats to how people think of themselves as being good people. I don't know how many men I've talked to who you know, hate identity politics. Without thinking about their own identities, right? Because in fact, from their perspective, which we keep hearing over and over again, they've done what everybody can do, which is work hard and provide and protect and do exactly what they were told to do, which in fact, they are doing, they are. And in fact, there are rewards that come with and those rewards do not extend to other people. That's the point. So the diversity and inclusion conversations come, as you say, to a hard stop because they, they have to happen intimately. Yeah. You know, they, they have, they, that's, that's the only way things are gonna change. Melissa: One of the things Amy, Nancy and I were talking about as we've been trying to get sponsorships for the conference, right? Because as you do, like it's a conference, right? Sponsorships. Right. One of the things we realized really early on, because I'm like, this is a DEI, no-brainer. We have elevated like people with disabilities. Yeah. You know, indigenous folks, like trans women, like we've. I've never been so involved with an organization that actually is doing all of this. Like I, I was really surprised. Yeah. Whoa. Like, this is real, right? We're having such a hard time getting money, and I realized we, we had this moment, this epiphany, Soraya, where I was like, we're elevating the other. A hundred percent. A hundred percent. Every person involved with this conference is the other. Yeah. And corporations can all day talk about how committed they are to whomever we wanna name, but when it comes to putting their money where their mouth is Right, they don't deliver. I agree. And I'm wondering if you think. If you have any ideas about how we can all leave this summit and, and really start to hold people's feet to the fire as we're moving into this new era where so much is gonna get decimated. Soraya: I belong to many different organizations. I've set on the boards and advisory boards of many organizations dedicated to. Um, representation, diversity and inclusion in lots of different industries. And the first thing that happens, of course, is that you, you go after the easy, theoretically, money, people who you already know are predisposed. If you belong to, uh, uh, an organization that traditionally focused on women mm-hmm. , you might go after. Women donors, right? Sure, sure. Yeah. Beautiful. To an organization that focused on black women, there were far less women donors that were black women. So, you know, your, your pool might be a little narrower. Yep. But what what happens is that even as you say, it's, it's not just in your case that you've gone after the other, it's that even a word like Passionista. Marginalize as an organization. Mm-hmm, because of its feminized underlying, vaguely sexualized, you know, kind of con the language, the context, the biases that go into that. Imagine if you had this kind of organization dedicated to men trailblazers, you just probably wouldn't call it Passionista. And so we end up being marginalized just by virtue of the words and identities that we're trying to support. When we do that, we end up, first of all, just going after about two to 4% of available monies that leaves the other 96 to 98. That in terms of private money, comes from men, individual men, wealthy men. Mm-hmm and, and I'm always flummoxed. Why, why are we not asking these very outspoken, wealthy men who claim to be supporters of freedom and you know, on and on and on. I'm like, where's their money? Yes, where's their money going? I mean, I only vaguely tongue in cheek did I suggest to a friend yesterday that there should just be a Men of Conscience organization that handed money over. Here's the money. Mm-hmm, but you know, very often money comes with strings attached. Yep. And that gets very complicated for some organizations, you know? Yeah. Um, so it kind of becomes a vicious, self-fulfilling cycle, cycle of scarcity. Mm-hmm. But we do have to find. To hold people publicly accountable. Yeah. Hold organizations accountable. There's very little transparency. Yeah. That's a big problem. You know, so I don't, you know, I don't have a really easy solution. I would say though, that if you are a trailblazer and gender is a component of your trailblazing, be aware of the degree to which that becomes marginalizing. By default, I mean, for 10 years now, I've lobbying fighting, engage in activism around freedom of expression, online harassment, violence against women, and really and truly, you have to explain which gobsmacking to me still why that's a matter of democracy. Yes, right. When your most vulnerable, marginalized citizens cannot speak without the threat of violence, yes, and harm and rape and lynching and horrible things, your democracy is not functioning. We just live in a society as we know where it's not until the freeze breach. Of the most powerful, who still tend to be cisgendered, straight white men, Christian. It's not until the those rights start getting scratched at that people pay attention to democracy. There's nothing new here. This is the, you know, it's the history of the nation that doesn't make it any less frustrating. How can we come together? I think it's very important to come together. To for, you know, the, the one thing about the internet, despite all of its bad, bad aspects, is that it does enable people to come together to build fluid communities. Um, you can build, you know, chains of ad hoc communities. That are meaningful and valuable and supportive and you know, people can share moments of joy and humor and accomplishment and shared goals and visions. And I think it's very easy, particularly since we seem to be pretending we still are not in a pandemic, but we are right. In a time like this, I think it's very easy not just to feel isolated, but also to withdraw. You know, I felt that tendency where. I think it's better to be alone than to be to, to subject other people to my particular mindset. Right now, I know what that's like. We, we went to dinner last week and this weekend and I walked in. I saw a man and I thought, if he offers me a drink, I think I have to just, I'm just gonna say to him, well, what do you want me to have? Because, What the fuck where you're at. Yeah. That's where I am. Right. I'm like, I can't have a conversation. I need to not have this conversation. Yeah, right. And, but I think that's a bad instinct. What we need is more connection, not disconnection, not connection with people we're angry at. I don't want to suggest that, you know, but we need to build on the relationships that bring us comfort and joy and connect. And we need to make those connections with more and more and more people. I, I love what I, I, what I love about that is that, um, I've been saying that if we really, truly are ready to disrupt white supremacy and racism, sexism, homophobia, transphobia, all the things, if we are really truly there, then connecting on. And allowing ourselves to let this crumble right is really important because I don't wanna live under a regime that is founded on the doctrine of discovery and manifest destiny. That's exactly right. Like we have been, we've been, nobody knows, frankly, what the doctrine of discovery is. Right. It is the document that our constitution is founded on, which says if you go to a piece of land from wherever you are and you, uh, whatever European Christian country, whatever European Christian country you're coming from, and you discover it, then you have free reign to kill everybody who's on it. So you can discover it. Yeah. And that is the Reader's Digest condensed version in literally half a second. Melissa: But I don't wanna live under that and when we come together and hold each other in all of this and we connect wherever we're at, then we can start to figure out ways to move through this as it is burning around us. Soraya: Yeah. Yeah. And I think too in, in terms of coming to terms with what all of that really means, I think that. What's very clear is that communities that have been under-resourced and PO and and punished for centuries. For centuries, right, they have been responsible for themselves. They have already been at war with the government. They have already been punished repeatedly by the society. Yes. You know, this is not new. Honestly, what's new right now I think is the shock to white communities. Just like, just like when Trump was elected, frankly. Yeah, right. Just the shock of it. To some people that, my God, it can actually happen. And you're like, yeah, yes it can. Yeah, sure enough it can. Cause it has, it's happened over and over and over again. And so that circle of people who are negatively affected is now bigger. And I think part of the problem is the instinct in many communities is, well, we need to do something and then they start from. Instead of stepping back and thinking this would be a really good time to educate myself, to listen, to learn, to support the leaders who've already been doing this, the communities that understand how to do this, you know, and I know this too, I will say this flat out because I have seen this over and over again. What often happens, particularly among. You've seen this too, right? In feminist organizations, but philanthropic organizations that aren't specifically feminists. White women will replicate patriarchal power structures by default, you know, and, and they will act in ways that are corrosive. To other types of organizations and societies. So very hierarchical, very dominant, very power over, very top down. We've seen that. We've seen that destroy organizations over and over again. So I think it's just really important in this moment. To step back and be very self-reflective. How am I contributing to this problem structurally without knowing it? What mistakes have I made? What can I learn? How can I be quiet? How can I learn? How can I learn? Is really, I think, possibly the most important thing that can, the question people can ask right now, we all can learn. Melissa: Soraya:, thank you so much for your time. Oh, thank you. I'm blazing a trail that I can go running down to. Soraya: No, thank you again. Really and truly. And you know, I wanna say thank you to Nancy and Amy especially, um, and always such a delight to talk to you and to work with you in solidarity. Um, so thank you all very. Passionistas: Thanks for listening to the awards presentation with Soraya Chemaly, and thanks to Dr. Melissa Bird for the amazing interview. To learn more about Dr. Bird, visit DrMelissaBird.com. To learn more about Soraya, visit SorayaChemaly.com and be sure to subscribe to The Passionista Project Podcast so you don't miss any of our upcoming inspiring guests. Until next time, stay well and stay passionate.

In On Repentance and Repair: Making Amends in an Unapologetic World, Rabbi Danya Ruttenberg offers a crucial new perspective to navigating conflict, applying an ancient framework to the country's most painful contemporary issues—from systemic racism and the legacy of enslavement to the #MeToo movement and Native American land rights—as well as personal transgressions. In conversation with Soraya Chemaly, a journalist, activist, and author of Rage Becomes Her.  This program was held on September 21, 2022 in partnership with the National Council of Jewish Women. 

In this episode Raquel and Jennifer discuss the book Rage Becomes Her: The Power of Women's Anger by Soraya Chemaly. Chemaly writes, "...our rage is one the most important resources we have, our sharpest tool against both personal and political oppression. Our anger is a vital instrument and a catalyst for change.” Listen in as Raquel and Jennifer talk about rage, how it shows up in their own lives and how it can be utilized constructively. "Be angry. Be loud. Rage becomes you." Indeed!Soraya Chemaly's website: http://www.sorayachemaly.com/10 Simple Words Every Girl Should Learn, http://www.rolereboot.org/culture-and-politics/details/2014-05-10-simple-words-every-girl-learn/index.html“Stop interrupting me.” “I just said that.”“No explanation needed.”Let Raquel and Jennifer know what you think about this and other episodes of Madness Cafe on IG @madnesscafepodcast or by email at madnesscafepodcast@gmail.com.And don't forget to rate and review the show wherever you listen!Thanks for listening and responding!

Soraya Chemaly is an award-winning author and activist. She writes and speaks frequently on topics related to gender norms, inclusivity, social justice, free speech, sexualized violence, and technology. The former Executive Director of The Representation Project and Director and co-founder of the Women's Media Center Speech Project, she has long been committed to expanding women's civic and political participation.Soraya is also the author of Rage Becomes Her: The Power of Women's Anger, which was recognized as a Best Book of 2018 by the Washington Post, Fast Company, Psychology Today, and NPR and has been translated into multiple languages. She is a contributor to several anthologies, and her work is featured widely in media, documentaries, books, and academic research. In this episode, we talk about the gendering of emotion, how women's anger is often hidden, misunderstood, misrepresented, vilified, and yet important and deserving of attention. Soraya speaks about her research and we talk about intersectionality, the long-term impacts of not being able to own one's anger, and how we can do more to reclaim our rage. I loved every minute of speaking to Soraya, and hope you enjoy this conversation too. Buy 'Rage Becomes Her' here: https://uk.bookshop.org/a/5890/9781471172113 Support the show

EP204. Soraya Chemaly is an activist and award-winning author of Rage Becomes Her: The Power of Women's Anger. Renee and Soraya chat about anger and motherhood, why women don't express anger in our culture and, how can we raise children in a way that promotes healthy expression of anger regardless of gender. This is such an important episode! RENEE REINA Instagram: @themomroompodcast | @reneereina_ The Mom Room Shop TikTok: @reneereina_ Facebook Community Youtube: Renee Reina- The Mom Room Podcast SORAYA CHEMALY Instagram: @sorayachemaly | @ragebecomesher Book: Rage Becomes Her SPONSORS Pull-Ups. Little Passports. Goli. Betterhelp. Binto. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Ever been called an angry feminist? Us too. Soraya Chemaly is a writer, speaker, and activist who studies the many reasons women have to be angry, and why they're called bitches, hot-headed, crazy feminists when they are. She is an award-winning activist, the best-selling author of Rage Becomes Her: The Power of Women's Anger, and director and co-founder of the Women's Media Center Speech Project. She joins Sabrina to discuss:• The reasons women have to be angry, from microaggressions to macro-level sexism• Why anger is actually one of the most hopeful, forward-thinking, and powerful emotions• Why men and women are conditioned to experience and display emotion differentlyLike what you hear and want more? Sign up for our newsletter full of episode updates and resources on issues impacting women around the world.

Anger is one of the basic (and healthy) emotions, though many of us cultured as girls and women were never taught how to "do" anger. Lacking this emotion in your toolbox can show up as poor boundaries, un-kind self talk, and can even manifest as a never-ending quest of self-improvement. We feel sad and blame ourselves when things go wrong, and these bad feelings have nowhere to go. Learning how to do anger won't make you a raging b*tch, but it will make you more assertive, better able to make positive change in the world, and happier. Rage becomes her by Soraya Chemaly

Get ready to shake up your beliefs and behaviors about gender as we dive deep into Patriarchy Stress Disorder (PSD). A phrase coined by Dr. Valerie Rein, author of “Patriarchy Stress Disorder: The Invisible Barrier to Women's Happiness and Fulfillment,” in this podcast episode you'll understand the problem with our patriarchal society and how we as women hold ourselves back due to society's “norms” of achievement and accomplishment. If you've ever held yourself back, not spoken up, experienced self-sabotage, felt uncomfortable with receiving pleasure, not asked for help when you know you needed it, you may be suffering from symptoms from living in oppressive patriarchy that has held women back from their true power for over a thousand years. What if breaking through your self-limiting beliefs was not even about YOU? What if it was because you have grown up in the environment of a patriarchal society? After all, you can't heal yourself in the same environment that got you sick, right? As we are seeing more and more shifting gender roles and understanding how generational beliefs are passed down and triggered biologically, how can women break through the patriarchal structure and reclaim their power as sovereign, Queens! Dr. Valerie Rein is a psychologist, women's mental health expert, and business consultant who has discovered Patriarchy Stress Disorder (PSD) and created the only science-backed system for helping women achieve their ultimate success, happiness, and fulfillment by healing the intergenerational trauma of oppression. She holds an EdM in Psychological Counseling from Columbia University and a Ph.D. in Psychology from the Institute of Transpersonal Psychology. Her bestselling book, “Patriarchy Stress Disorder: The Invisible Inner Barrier to Women's Happiness and Fulfillment” has been heralded by Amazon reviewers as “the most important body of literary work of our modern times” and “perhaps the most important book of the century for women.” Dr. Valerie is most passionate about the intersections of deep inner work and business. She is a sought-after speaker at conferences and companies committed to diversity and inclusion, leadership development, and unlocking people's full potential. #patriarchy #womensrights #internationalwomensday #feminism

Eavesdrop on a candid conversation with Julie and a few friends about womanhood and how it affects marriage, friendships, faith and self-esteem. Hear where they have been and some ways they are finding their way through, out and toward healing. They speak strongly to women, but say things that everyone, regardless of sex, need to hear!Books mentioned on the pod:Untamed by Glennon Doyle Rage Becomes Her by Soraya Chemaly

Cathy and Todd talk with Soraya Chemaly, author of Rage Becomes Her: The Power of Women's Anger and Executive Director of The Representation Project. They discuss the importance of emotional competence, how to discuss gender inequality with our kids, and why we should pay attention to our own gender conditioning.

Cathy and Todd talk with Soraya Chemaly, author of Rage Becomes Her: The Power of Women's Anger and Executive Director of The Representation Project. They discuss the importance of emotional competence, how to discuss gender inequality with our kids, and why we should pay attention to our own gender conditioning.