Podcasts about Bilton

A 37-year 60 Minutes correspondent got fired in a conference room over a dinner he refused to attend. Scott Pelley lost his job and won the PR war in the same week, and the side that was supposed to be running the institution handed him the moral high ground in writing.Everyone is covering the firing. Molly is covering the two dueling statements, the word "performative" in a termination letter, and the moment CBS made it personal while Pelley kept it strictly business.Chapters:0:00  — The Cinnamon Gummy Bear and a Notification That Ended 37 Years3:30  — Bari Weiss, David Ellison and the Paramount Skydance Takeover7:00  — Tanya Simon Out, Nick Bilton In, and a 60 Minutes EP With No Broadcast Background10:30 — "She Is Murdering 60 Minutes" — The All-Staff Meeting Ambush15:00 — Reading the Bilton Termination Letter Line by Line20:00 — "It's Not Personal, It's Business" — The Godfather and You've Got Mail Move24:30 — Pelley's Statement, the 19 Minutes, and Why He Never Names Weiss or Bilton30:00 — The Trump Lawsuit, Brendan Carr and the Warner Bros Acquisition Motive34:00 — Bari Weiss's Leaked "Find a Way Back" CBS Morning Call38:00 — The Three Remaining Correspondents, Megyn Kelly's "Whiny" Callout and the Wednesday Podcast SwitchWe dissect:-The Paramount Skydance ownership change, David Ellison's fingerprints on every move, and why Bari Weiss arriving as editor-in-chief last October was the real start of the timeline-Nick Bilton's resume — British documentary filmmaker, ex-New York Times tech columnist, Elizabeth Holmes credits, zero broadcast journalism — and why that detail matters at the institution Mike Wallace built-The exact line Pelley fired across the room — "She's murdering 60 Minutes. She does not love this place. She was brought in to kill it" — and why a 37-year veteran called it a setup-Bilton's termination letter dissected aloud — the present-tense "it is a profound disappointment," the dinner invitation framing, "performative misconduct," and the leak that contradicted its own claim about not making headlines-Pelley's written reply naming nothing personal — "new management instructed me to inject falsehoods and bias," the 19-minutes-from-not-airing specificity, and the accusation that politicians are being invited to choose correspondents-Bari Weiss's leaked CBS Morning call — "trust and mutual respect," "find a way back" — and why that single phrase handed Pelley a second statement to puncture-The Trump 60 Minutes lawsuit settlement, FCC chair Brendan Carr, and the Warner Bros acquisition as the business motive sitting under every editorial move-The three remaining full-time correspondents reportedly debating mass retirement, Megyn Kelly calling the Bilton letter "whiny," a Stephen Colbert exit comparison, and a Keith Olbermann–Tony Dokoupil sidebar nobody saw coming-This is not a broadcast-news obituary for 60 Minutes. It is a side-by-side read of two statements written about the same room, and a reminder that in a crisis the choice between "new management" and a person's name is the entire ballgame.Want More Behind the Breakdown? Follow The PR Breakdown with Molly McPherson on Substack for early access to podcast episodes, private member chats, weekly live sessions, and monthly workshops that go deeper than the mic. It is the inside hub for communicators who want real strategy, clear judgment, and a little side-eye where it counts.Follow Molly on Substack Subscribe to Molly's Weekly Newsletter  Need a Keynote Speaker? Drawing from real-world PR battles, Molly delivers the same engaging stories and hard-won crisis insights from the podcast to your live audience. Click here to book Molly for your next meeting. Follow & Connect with Molly:https://www.youtube.com/mollymcphersonhttps://mollymcpherson.substack.com/https://www.tiktok.com/@mollybmcphersonhttps://www.instagram.com/molly.mcpherson/...

On Tuesday, 60 Minutes executive producer, Nick Bilton, fired the show's longtime correspondent Scott Pelley following a confrontation during a staff meeting in which Pelley criticized Bilton and CBS News Editor-in-Chief Bari Weiss. Pelley's firing is the latest shakeup at the show and network since Weiss took the head role in October 2025; Pelley and other former correspondents have accused Weiss of interfering in editorial decisions in an attempt to cover the Trump administration in a more positive light. Ad-free podcasts are here!To listen to this podcast ad-free, and to enjoy our subscriber only premium content, go to ReadTangle.com to sign up!We're coming to the stage!In 10 days, Isaac and a panel of sharp thinkers are coming to West Virginia to discuss the societal effects of artificial intelligence. They'll tackle questions like, What would happen if AI disappeared today vs. five years from now? Who makes a stronger case between the cynics and the optimists? Could we ban AI even if we wanted to? It'll be a scintillating chat, and you can be in the room where it's happening if you get your tickets now.You can read today's podcast⁠ ⁠⁠here⁠⁠⁠ and today's “Under the radar.” story ⁠here⁠ and today's “Have a nice day” story ⁠here⁠.You can subscribe to Tangle by clicking here or drop something in our tip jar by clicking here. Take the survey: What do you think of Scott Pelley's dismissal? Let us know.Our Executive Editor and Founder is Isaac Saul. Our Executive Producer is Jon Lall.This podcast written by: Isaac Saul and audio edited and mixed by Dewey Thomas. Music for the podcast was produced by Diet 75.Our newsletter is edited by Managing Editor Ari Weitzman, Senior Editor Will Kaback, Lindsey Knuth, Bailey Saul, and Audrey Moorehead. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Charles Manson famously said, “You can't kill me. I'm already dead.” I thought about that quote as the 60 Minutes scandal erupted, with a conversation between reporter Scott Pelley and newly hired producer Nick Bilton. From the NYT:“She is murdering ‘60 Minutes,'” [Scott Pelley] said. “She does not love this place. She was brought in to kill it, and she's been doing exactly that.”Mr. Pelley added: “She has no qualifications for her job; you have slender qualifications for this job. The changes that she's made at the ‘Evening News' have been catastrophic, so why should we expect that any of this is going to be any better?”Mr. Bilton responded: “Well, I will show you. That's what I have to say. That is my plan over the next two weeks. I'll be meeting with everyone. I'm very excited to meet with everyone, yourself included.”Needless to say, it didn't exactly go as planned. Several sanctimonious “don't you know who I am” statements later, Pelley was out. 60 Minutes isn't quite dead, but it is a relic of the past. In the 1990s, it was pulling in 20-30 million viewers. That dropped to 14-16 million in the 2000s. By the 2010s, it was down to 10-12 million. Now, just 9 million people tune in every week in a country of 340 million. Much of that is due to the changes in technology, but still. There is no doubt that 60 Minutes, like all of legacy media, is trapped inside the same bubble that thinks Jimmy Kimmel's nightly monologue is still relevant, believes the Oscars still represent the majority of moviegoers, and that the New York Times has its finger on the pulse of everyday America. Like so much of what we might call “resistance era culture,” there doesn't seem to be a place for 60 Minutes in our culture now, beyond being a propaganda tool for the Democrats, which explains why so many of them feel a profound sense of loss now that Bari Weiss was brought in to give them a refresh. Pelley's statement to call out the new management at 60 Minutes was the hissy fit heard round the world. The irony is that his statement is itself bad journalism. He throws around serious allegations without offering any concrete examples:Pelley has since talked to the New York Times to explain what he means by some of this, but even still, these are all examples of his own bias, one he can't see and refuses to admit even exists. Instead, he insists that 60 Minutes is now showing bias simply by representing the other point of view.In the interview, he explains how Bari Weiss wanted him to portray the other side of the story in the killing of Alex Pretti and Renee Good. He says he did not think she drove her car into the officer or that Pretti was in any way violent. While that doesn't mean they should have lost their lives, there is no question that they were at war with federal officers in a way we've never seen since the last Civil War. His bias was front and center at a speech in 2025, where his mass delusions about what this country has become were laid bare. This guy was willing to give Bari Weiss a chance, come on.Already a legend in his own mind, Pelley is writing his own legacy now as a self-made hero who stood up to the fascist regime.Here is Michael Moynihan: A Woketopia, if You Can Keep ItSome say 60 Minutes never recovered from its biggest scandal, when CBS Corporate forced the show to censor an interview with Big Tobacco whistleblower Jeffrey Wigand, as depicted in Michael Mann's brilliant film The Insider. The Hollywood of today would never make a movie like that unless it somehow blamed Trump and the Republicans. Not only wouldn't they make it, but they couldn't make it, no one inside the empire would allow it because, contrary to their own mass delusions, the fascism was always coming from inside the house — all sticks of wood bound together as one, where no dissent is allowed.I look around now, and I see relics of the old empire. They're frantic and wild-eyed. They're terrified that it all came crashing down. They don't know why America turned away. But I do. We never set out to build an empire. For us, it was riding the wave of new technology, new social media, a new computer in our pockets, and a brand new president to bring us into the promised land.It was not Donald Trump's fault that our empire collapsed. It was the old cliche about how power corrupts. We acquired too much of it. Every company, institution, celebrity, movie studio, publishing house, and ordinary person has a social media platform. If you controlled social media, you could control them. Our public humiliation factory kept everyone in line, lest they be “it” on social media.That was true even before Trump won, but the tweak to the algorithm in 2017, Donald Trump becoming president and ruling over Twitter at the same time, sent those of us inside the empire into waves of uncontrollable mass hysteria. Many of them would never come out of it and are still locked in the spell of the mass delusion that a “fascist dictator, racist, rapist, criminal, pedophile” won the election in America not once, but twice. Somebody had to be lying. Pelley simply can't tell the story the other way because he can't see it. He's still inside of it. I see them now, those who bought the dream like I did, befuddled as to what to do next. They just want their power back, their empire, their utopia. Use fear, that always works to drive lazy voters to the polls. Fear of what? Tax cuts for the rich? Fox News? No, fear of the big things, the existential things, like “fascism” and “democracy.”How do you even come back from that and make a pitch to the people that you should be put back in power to rule over a country you believe is under a Nazi occupation? How does Bruce Springsteen, Robert De Niro, Barbra Streisand, Katie Couric, Ellen DeGeneres, not to mention every single Democrat politician, come back from that?Maybe it's the effect of the internet on our brains, but the so-called “resistance” seems to have lost touch with the tangible reality of history, of what it looks like to fight real fascism. What Nazis really were. When you can make any reality you want, why wouldn't you?They are fine with the guy who has a Nazi tattoo because to them, that isn't real. Of course, leave it to Salena Zito to do the job of a real journalist and remind us:70-80 million people died in World War II fighting to save the world from a fascist dictator, a real one. How can these people live with themselves by spreading the lie that we are living through anything like that now? And that, more than anything, is why the empire collapsed. It was built on a foundation of delusions and lies. Bari Weiss and the Fourth TurningI have Bari Weiss to thank for starting this Substack. Very few people had the courage or the moxie to stand up to the Twitter mob back in 2020, but she did. I was on Twitter the night the mob came for her. The screeching scolds had already been nipping at her heels at the New York Times after she was brought in to shake up the ideological chokehold the Left had on the paper (and still does). They hated her, gossiped about her, shunned her, and yet, there she was, showing up anyway. She is built of stronger stuff than the kind of person who would ever crumple under the weight of the mob. Tom Cotton's essay, Send in the Troops, reflected the views of most Americans, that if the riots over the Summer could not be controlled, the military should be brought in. Their opinions did not matter to the mob or, apparently, to the New York Times. While 60 Minutes spent many stories on January 6th, they barely touched the riots in the Summer of 2020. They didn't talk about the false narrative of Jacob Blake in Kenosha. That was left to local reporters.They never told the other side of the story because no one did until Bari Weiss tried and was smacked down in a way that woke me up. It was like the lantern dropping out of the sky in The Truman Show. It punctured the delusion at long last, and I realized that I was not getting the truth from the legacy media. They were lying to us and gaslighting us because Trump had to lose the election, and nothing else could matter. But the truth still mattered to me. And it mattered to Bari Weiss. Eventually, she would launch a Substack revolution with The Free Press and urge others to follow her. And so I did. Weiss is a millennial, the generation that's to take the baton from the Baby Boomers, per the book, The Fourth Turning. You can see this unfolding everywhere, but perhaps nowhere as profoundly as with what happened at the Times and now at 60 Minutes.Here is how the Times' Lulu Garcia-Navarro's interview with Pelley went on how he came to know Bari Weiss:Um, yeah, sure pal. That sounds like padding for an upcoming lawsuit, not the truth. There is no way the Scott Pelley, who gave that speech at Wake Forest, is going to give someone hired by David Ellison “the benefit of the doubt.” That he had never even heard of Bari Weiss or had no idea any scandal had erupted at the Times over the Tom Cotton op-ed says it all. The Fourth Turning is like winter. The old must die to make way for the new. Trump didn't collapse the empire on his own, but he's a “Gray Champion” all the same. The one Baby Boomer who could tear it all down to make way for the millennials, like Bari Weiss, to reshape the future for the generations to come.MAGAIn 2020, I escaped the Doomsday Cult our empire had become and was searching for signs of life, for truth, for something that felt real. I began driving across the country and saw an America that people like me had forgotten even existed. It wasn't a virtual world where we make our own reality. It was a tangible place, with things people built with their own hands. It was farms, churches, town squares, neighborhoods, highways, and factories. What we built online had no place for this America. If you never understand that, you'll never understand MAGA. From the hills, the backyards, and the fields, one name called out from this forgotten America: Trump.Even now, in 2026, these signs still stand. Not just in one state, in nearly every state. Trump is not in power because he's a fascist. He's in power because we, the people, put him there to fight for us against the mighty empire that was like a black hole, sucking all of American society into it.Anyone who thinks Bari Weiss would do Donald Trump's bidding at CBS News is living in a fantasy. They don't know her, they don't know him, and they most certainly do not know this country anymore. It doesn't seem like it's asking too much for guys like Scott Pelley to snap out of it at long last and to realize this is a big country with lots of different kinds of people in it. And all of them have the same right to representation. If the culture stopped speaking to them and the government stopped representing them, well, it's all over but the shouting.// This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit www.sashastone.com/subscribe

Send us Fan MailAngelo, Rhea, and Jay are back — and this week there are three numbers that have shaken Hollywood to its core: $81 million, $100 million, and $52 million. That's what three YouTube kids just grossed at the box office... a 20-year-old with Backrooms, a 26-year-old who turned $750K into Obsession's biggest second-weekend spike in modern box office history, and Markiplier, who walked out of a gaming channel and grossed $52 million on $3 million. The film school brats gave us Scorsese and Coppola. The VHS kids gave us Tarantino and Rodriguez. Is this the YouTube generation?THEN: Scott Pelley walked into a meeting and told his new boss, Nick Bilton, to his face that Bilton and Bari Weiss are "murdering 60 Minutes" to placate Donald Trump. CBS is still waiting on federal approval for the Paramount/Warner Brothers merger, Bilton has zero broadcast background, and Pelley just lit a match on his own legacy. At what point does speaking truth to power become career suicide — and does it even matter if you're right?ALL THAT PLUS: Byron Allen's Comics Unleashed is a DUD, Rhea delivers what can only be described as a passionate sermon for The Sheep Detective, Angelo checks out a new show by The Fonz and much MUCH more!MAKE SURE TO VISIT OUR SPONSOR: Steven Singer Jewelers!The TV Show is a weekly podcast hosted by Jay Black, with regular guests Angelo Cataldi and Rhea Hughes. Each week, we dive into the new Golden Age of Television, with a discussion of the latest shows and news.

Scott Pelley just got fired from CBS News and 60 Minutes "for cause" after publicly ambushing new executive producer Nick Bilton at an all-hands meeting. Bilton's termination letter is savage — and Pelley's pompous response trying to blame Donald Trump and Barry Weiss makes it even better. His Wake Forest commencement speech from last year might be the most Ron Burgundy thing you've ever seen. For free and unbiased Medicare help, dial 580-308-0975 to speak with my trusted partner, Chapter, or go https://askchapter.org/oconnor *Paid Partnership* SHOP OUR MERCH: https://store.townhallmedia.com/ BUY A LARRY MUG: https://store.townhallmedia.com/products/larry-mug Watch LARRY with Larry O'Connor LIVE — Monday-Thursday at 12PM Eastern on YouTube, Facebook, & Rumble! Find LARRY with Larry O'Connor wherever you get your podcasts! SPOTIFY: https://open.spotify.com/show/7i8F7K4fqIDmqZSIHJNhMh?si=814ce2f8478944c0&nd=1&dlsi=e799ca22e81b456f APPLE: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/larry/id1730596733 Become a Townhall VIP Member today and use promo code LARRY for 50% off: https://townhall.com/subscribe?tpcc=poddescription https://townhall.com/ https://rumble.com/c/c-5769468 https://www.facebook.com/townhallcom/ https://www.instagram.com/townhallmedia/ https://twitter.com/townhallcom Chapter: Chapter and its affiliates are not connected with or endorsed by any government entity or the federal Medicare program. Chapter Advisory, LLC represents Medicare Advantage HMO, PPO, and PFFS organizations and stand alone prescription drug plans that have a Medicare contract. Enrollment depends on the plan’s contract renewal. While we have a database of every Medicare plan nationwide and can help you to search among all plans, we have contracts with many but not all plans. As a result, we do not offer every plan available in your area. Currently we represent 50 organizations which offer 18,160 products nationwide. We search and recommend all plans, even those we don’t directly offer. You can contact a licensed Chapter agent to find out the number of products available in your specific area. Please contact Medicare.gov, 1-800-Medicare, or your local State Health Insurance Program (SHIP) to get information on all of your options.Become a Townhall VIP member with promo code "LARRY": https://townhall.com/subscribeSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

An audio recording of the most explosive staff meeting we’ve ever heard was leaked to several news outlets. In the recording, there is a heated exchange between former Evening News anchor and ’60 Minutes’ correspondent Scott Pelley and newly appointed Executive Producer Nick Bilton. We go over the jaw dropping back and forth which included Pelley telling Bilton he and Editor-in-Chief Bari Weiss aren’t qualified for their positions. We’ll also explain why Bari Weiss herself chose not to be at the meeting. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

An audio recording of the most explosive staff meeting we’ve ever heard was leaked to several news outlets. In the recording, there is a heated exchange between former Evening News anchor and ’60 Minutes’ correspondent Scott Pelley and newly appointed Executive Producer Nick Bilton. We go over the jaw dropping back and forth which included Pelley telling Bilton he and Editor-in-Chief Bari Weiss aren’t qualified for their positions. We’ll also explain why Bari Weiss herself chose not to be at the meeting. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

An audio recording of the most explosive staff meeting we’ve ever heard was leaked to several news outlets. In the recording, there is a heated exchange between former Evening News anchor and ’60 Minutes’ correspondent Scott Pelley and newly appointed Executive Producer Nick Bilton. We go over the jaw dropping back and forth which included Pelley telling Bilton he and Editor-in-Chief Bari Weiss aren’t qualified for their positions. We’ll also explain why Bari Weiss herself chose not to be at the meeting. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

An audio recording of the most explosive staff meeting we’ve ever heard was leaked to several news outlets. In the recording, there is a heated exchange between former Evening News anchor and ’60 Minutes’ correspondent Scott Pelley and newly appointed Executive Producer Nick Bilton. We go over the jaw dropping back and forth which included Pelley telling Bilton he and Editor-in-Chief Bari Weiss aren’t qualified for their positions. We’ll also explain why Bari Weiss herself chose not to be at the meeting. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

In this insightful interview, Omer Slavin, CEO and co-founder of BiltOn, shares his journey from construction roots to leading a construction tech startup focused on safety management. Discover how innovative use of AI, industry ecosystem dynamics, and customer success stories are shaping the future of construction safety.   key topics Construction industry evolution AI-driven safety management Building industry ecosystem Early adoption of technology is crucial for safety improvements. Building strong industry relationships accelerates growth. AI can proactively prevent accidents in construction. Chapters   00:00 Journey from Construction to Tech Innovation 02:18 Building a Culture of Safety and Collaboration 04:46 Navigating the Construction Tech Ecosystem 07:14 Challenges and Milestones in Growth 08:54 Embracing AI in Construction Safety 11:08 Go-to-Market Strategies in Construction Tech 13:29 Vision for the Future of BiltOn 15:48 Lessons Learned and Advice for Entrepreneurs  

In this episode, we chat with Gavin Bilton, Wales' Strongest Man, about his journey to Britains Strongest Man 2026, his upcoming appearance at Europe's Strongest Man on April 11th, and the potential of competing at the World's Strongest Man. Dive into his training secrets, mindset, and what drives him to push his limits. Tune in for an inspiring conversation! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In this special episode, Mark Bilton is joined by Joshua Sparks for a grounded and deeply human conversation about healthspan, purpose, and what it means to stay well over the long term. Joshua Sparks is a podcaster, strategic advisor, and former leader at Sass & Bide and Thom Browne in New York. This is his second time joining Mark, but this conversation is different. It is a true collaboration, recorded for both Lead Well Live Well and Sparks Journal. Together, Mark and Josh explore why so many leaders and creatives feel depleted despite external success, and why the conversation must move beyond productivity, performance, and longevity alone. This episode covers: What healthspan really means and why it matters more than lifespan Why being human is not a weakness in leadership, but a strength How purpose, identity, and wellbeing are closely connected The role of habits and consistency in sustaining energy and clarity What it takes to live and lead well over the long term This is an honest, reflective discussion between two good friends who have spent decades working with leaders, creatives, and entrepreneurs. If you are seeking a healthier, more sustainable way to live and lead, this episode is for you.

What did people really eat in Shakespeare's England? In her new book, Much Ado About Cooking, food historian Sam Bilton uncovers the vibrant and surprising world of early modern cuisine—where sugar was locked away like treasure, fresh salads were everyday fare, and a “banquet” meant a “post-feast after party” dessert course. Bilton brings to life the flavors behind Shakespeare's food references: mince pies, herb-packed green sauces, saffron-brightened tarts, and even whimsical dishes crafted to look like something else entirely. These foods reveal a world shaped by global trade, humoral medicine, and a delight in spectacle. In this episode, Bilton discusses how cooking, dining, and food imagery can open a new window onto Shakespeare's plays and the people who lived, ate, and celebrated in his time. From the Shakespeare Unlimited podcast. Published December 16, 2025. © Folger Shakespeare Library. All rights reserved. This episode was produced by Matt Frassica. Garland Scott is the executive producer. It was edited by Gail Kern Paster. We had help with web production from Paola García Acuña. Leonor Fernandez edits our transcripts. We had technical help from Hamish Brown in Stirling, Scotland, and Voice Trax West in Studio City, California. Final mixing services provided by Clean Cuts at Three Seas, Inc. Sam Bilton is a food historian, author and presenter of the award-winning “Comfortably Hungry” and “A is for Apple” podcasts. She has written books on the history of gingerbread, saffron and chocolate, and writes articles on food history for a variety of print and online publications. Sam has also hosted several Shakespeare-themed supper clubs over the years. You can find out more details about Sam on her website: sambilton.com.

It's time for the now traditional end-of-season postbag episode of The British Food History Podcast, where I (attempt to) answer your questions, read out your comments and mull over your queries. Several photos and illustrations are mentioned in this episode: to see them, visit the accompanying blog post on British Food: A History: www.britishfoodhistory.comI'll be disappearing for a couple of months, unless of course, you are a monthly subscriber, where there will be a bonus episode coming up for you to listen to via the website: Keeping Food Traditions Alive with Tom Parker Bowles, which was recorded live at the Serve it Forth Food History Festival on 18 October.Remember: Fruit Pig are sponsoring the 9th season of the podcast. Visit their website www.fruitpig.co.uk to learn more about them, their journey, to find your local stockist and access their online shop.If you can, support the podcast and blogs by becoming a £3 monthly subscriber, and unlock lots of premium content, including bonus blog posts and recipes, access to the easter eggs and the secret podcast, or treat me to a one-off virtual pint or coffee: click here.This episode was mixed and engineered by Thomas Ntinas of the Delicious Legacy podcast.The accompanying blog post with imagesThings mentioned in today's episodeBook your place at the Serve it Forth Spooky Christmas Special on 11th of DecemberBBC article World black pudding championship throwers take aimLinny's Kitchen Facebook pageThe Ginger PigBillingsgate MarketBBC article about the Denby Dale pie playThe seaside town of MorecombeBooks discussed or mentioned in today's episodeBilton, S. Fool's Gold: A History of British Saffron. (Prospect Books, 2022).Thomas, J. & Schultz, C. How to Mix Drinks, Or, The Bon-Vivant's Companion. (Dick & Fitzgerald, 1862).Bilton, S. Much Ado About Cooking: Delicious Shakespearean Feasts for Every Occasion. (Headline, 2025)Buttery, N. Knead to Know: A History of Baking. (Icon Books, 2024).Previous pertinent podcast episodesBlack & White Pudding with Matthew Cockin & Grant Harper

My guest on The British Food History Podcast today food historian and friend of the show Sam Bilton, podcaster and author of Much Ado About Cooking Delicious Shakespearean Feasts for Every Occasion, published by Headline and commissioned by Shakespeare's Globe. It was, of course, a great opportunity to talk about the food of Shakespearean England as well as the food and drink references in Shakespeare's plays, and what they meant to those watching the plays at the time they were first performed.We talked about lots of cookery manuscripts, the importance of keeping historical recipes relevant, capons, Early Modern bread and greedy Falstaff's sack, amongst many other things.Those listening to the secret podcast can hear about horrible, sweet spinach tarts, Early Modern cakes, possets and more!Much Ado About Cooking by Sam BiltonSam's websiteFollow Sam on BlueSky, Insta and Threads @mrssbiltonComfortably HungryAis for Apple: An Encyclopaedia of Food & DrinkRemember: Fruit Pig are sponsoring the 9th season of the podcast. Visit their website www.fruitpig.co.uk to learn more about them, their journey, to find your local stockist and access their online shop.If you can, support the podcast and blogs by becoming a £3 monthly subscriber, and unlock lots of premium content, including bonus blog posts and recipes, access to the easter eggs and the secret podcast, or treat me to a one-off virtual pint or coffee: click here.This episode was mixed and engineered by Thomas Ntinas of the Delicious Legacy podcast.Things mentioned in today's episodeThe Globe TheatreWho is Falstaff?Books discussed or mentioned and further readingFirst Catch Your Gingerbread by Sam BiltonKnead to Know: A History of Baking by Neil ButteryA Dark History of Sugar by Neil ButteryEnglish Bread & Yeast Cookery by Elizabeth DavidThe Good Housewife's Jewel by Thomas Dawson

Author Bio: Sam Bilton has been intrigued by food history ever since her grandmother gave her a battered copy of Mrs Beeton's Cookery Book. Inside this book was a collection of handwritten recipes dating from around 1871 collated by her grandmother's Great Aunt Eliza. This little book would spark an interest in historical food which began as a hobby but would lead to a Masters in Culinary Arts and a career as a food historian, author, podcaster and supper club host/chef.Sam's first book on the history of gingerbread won a World Gourmand Cookbook award in 2021. She has also published Fool's Gold: A History of British Saffron (Prospect Books, 2022); The Philosophy of Chocolate (British Library Publishing, 2023) and Much Ado About Cooking, in collaboration with Shakespeare's Globe (October 2025).  She also contributed an essay on Christmas food traditions for the Phaidon Christmas Book (2023). Sam is the editor of Petits Propos Culinaires (PPC) an international journal on food, food history, cooking and cookery books and is a frequent contributor to national magazines, food festivals, television and radio. Sam produces and presents the Comfortably Hungry podcast which won the audio award for the Fortnum & Mason Food and Drink Awards in 2025. She is also a co-host/producer on the A is for Apple podcast.For further information visit sambilton.com  or follow Sam on Instagram and Bluesky @mrssbilton.Much Ado about Cooking (UK) October 23 https://www.amazon.co.uk/Much-Ado-About-Cooking-Shakespearean/dp/1035427680Much Ado about Cooking (US) November 11 https://www.amazon.com/Much-Ado-About-Cooking-Shakespearean/dp/1035427680_____Cookbook lovers, this one's for you! Get 25% off a subscription to ckbk with code WELLSEASONED — the ultimate digital cookbook library. Access nearly 1,000 full cookbooks from top authors Use on web and mobile app for cooking anytime, anywhere Save favorites, create custom "recipe playlists", search by ingredient and dietary preference Sync with your print cookbook collection via Eat Your BooksPerfect for serious home cooks and cookbook collectors alike.Go to the link https://join.ckbk.com/ckbk?code=WELLSEASONED

Tabitha Bilton; worship leader, wife, mother and passionate disciple and mentor of youth in worship ministry. Listen to the story of Tabitha as she shares her journey of faith through the grace and love of Jesus Christ!

We're kicking off 2025's first season of The Publisher Podcast by talking to Jim Bilton, Managing Director at Wessenden Marketing and Brandlab Research. Jim produces bimonthly research and updates on the business of content distribution through WessendenBriefing, and has decades of experience consulting for media businesses. In this episode, we explore the standout publisher product trends from 2024, what publishers are investing in this year, and how optimistic everyone is feeling. Jim also highlights some B2B and B2C publishers to watch this year from his surveys, which surprisingly are almost all legacy companies. This season of The Publisher Podcast & Newsletter is sponsored by Memberful, a best-in-class membership solution for independent publishers and journalists who want to diversify their revenue stream and connect with their audience.  Memberful lets you offer membership perks and exclusive content to your loyal audience, giving you full control over who has access to your articles, newsletters, podcast episodes, private community chats, and more. Take control of your publishing business this new year with Memberful. Visit memberful.com/publisherpod and get started with a free trial.

The tables have turned today because I am being interviewed by author, food historian and friend of the show Sam Bilton. My book Knead to Know is out now and published by Icon Books, and Sam very kindly agreed to interview me about it for the podcast. We talk about baking evolution, bakestone cookery, Jaffa Cakes and taxation, what's so great about wheat plus many other things.If you can, support the podcast and blogs by becoming a £3 monthly subscriber, and unlock lots of premium content, or treat me to a one-off virtual pint or coffee: click here.Sam Bilton's websiteSocial media: mrssbiltonSam's blog Comfortably HungryNeil's book Knead to Know is out now and published by Icon Books. The Philosophy of Puddings is also out now, published by The British LibraryBlog posts pertinent to today's episode:Manchets and PayndemaynMy Best Yorkshire Pudding RecipeClotted CreamPodcast episodes pertinent to today's episode:Cake Baxters in Early Modern Scotland with Aaron AllenYorkshire Pudding with Elaine Lemm50 Years of 'English Food' by Jane Grigson with Sam Bilton, Annie Gray, Ivan Day & Jill NormanThe Philosophy of Chocolate with Sam BiltonTripe Special: Sam Bilton & Neil Buttery Talk TripeBritish Saffron with Sam BiltonGingerbread with Sam BiltonThings mentioned in today's episode:Hodmedod's websiteDoves Farm websiteThe Art of Cookery by Hannah GlasseThe Whole Duty of a WomanUpcoming events:Find out about upcoming events on the website here.The Foyle's Christmas Evening 28 NovemberNeil's blogs:‘British Food: a History' ‘Neil Cooks Grigson' Neil's books:Before Mrs Beeton: Elizabeth Raffald, England's Most Influential Housekeeper

NYC Developer and PropTech Investor, Eric Brody, sits down with BiltOn's CEO, Omer Slavin. BiltOn provides Owners and GCs with premium solutions to enhance operational efficiency & mitigate risks across every project, helping avoid litigation. Is this the ConTech the industry was waiting for? Tune in and find out! Where to find BiltOn: https://bilton.tech/https://www.linkedin.com/company/bilton/ https://www.linkedin.com/in/omer-slavin/ Where to find Real Tech Talk: IG: https://www.instagram.com/realtechtalk/ FB: https://www.facebook.com/realtechtalk TW: https://twitter.com/realtechtalkpod Where to find Eric Brody: IG: https://www.instagram.com/e_brody/ linkedin.com/in/ericbrody1/ Interested in becoming a sponsor? Being a guest? Joining the investment fund? Contact: eric@rttpodcast.com About Real Tech Talk: Leading developer, investor and native New Yorker, Eric Brody, bridges the gap between technologists and PropTech by having no nonsense, frank conversations with the minds behind some of the hottest new PropTech innovations. As someone with skin in the game on both sides of the deal, Brody invites the folks behind technologies he genuinely finds interesting to come present their product. The question is - do these new players actually make an impact in the real world of construction? Someone needs to bring the big ideas down to the ground level and determine how they will actually change the experience, if at all. Having raised over $2 million and counting for a PropTech investment fund himself, Eric Brody is tapped into this burgeoning scene with a unique, necessary perspective.

گردآوری و روایت: ارشیا عطاری تدوین: طنین خاکسا  موسیقی تیترا‌ژ: مودی موسوی (اینستاگرام | توییتر) طراح گرافیک: تارا نباتیان اسپانسر: خانه مدیا نظرسنجی از مخاطبان چیزکست حمایت مالی از چیزکست اینستاگرام چیزکست | توییتر چیزکست | تلگرام چیزکست  وبسایت چیزکست منابع این قسمت   Agar, J. (2004). Constant touch: A global history of the mobile phone. Icon Books. ISBN 1-84046-541-7. Levinson, P. (2004). Cellphone: The story of the world's most mobile medium, and how it has transformed everything!. Palgrave Macmillan. ISBN 1-4039-6041-0. Klemens, G. (2010). The cellphone: The history and technology of the gadget that changed the world. McFarland & Company. ISBN 978-0786458670. Bilton, N. (2013, March 15). Who made that cellphone? The New York Times. https://www.nytimes.com/2013/03/17/magazine/who-made-that-cellphone.html. Swidish Educational Broadcasting Company. (2014). History of the cell phone: How did the mobile phone change the world? [Documentary]. Merchant, B. (2017). The one device: The secret history of the iPhone. Little, Brown and Company. ISBN 978-0316546160. Haase, C. (2021). Androids: The team that built the Android operating system. Coreware Publications. ISBN 978-1737354819.                  

The book English Food by Jane Grigson was published 50 years ago this year. It's a book that has completely changed my life and I wanted to celebrate it – and there are four excellent guests in today's slightly longer-than-usual episode: Sam Bilton, Ivan Day, Annie Gray and Jill Norman It is because of Jane and her book that I am doing what I'm doing today – she taught me how to cook, told me about England's fine and rich food culture and how to reconnect with it.We talk about the unique way Jane's book was published, Jane's approach to research and writing, her attention to detail, her friendship with Elizabeth David, favourite recipes, and her frustrations regarding low-quality shepherd's pie.Find out more about Sam Bilton and her work here.Find out more about Ivan Day and his work here.Find out more about Annie Gray and her work here.Find out more about Jill Norman and her work here.Support the podcast and blogs by becoming, if you can, a £3 monthly subscriber, and unlock lots of premium content, or treat me to a one-off virtual pint or coffee: click here.Things mentioned in today's episode:Neil's recent appearances on The Delicious Legacy, The Full English and Gastropod Neil's recent Daily Express articleTo see Neil's Country Life articles, please visit the website's Media pageThe Jane Grigson TrustBooks mentioned in today's episode:English Food by Jane Grigson Jane Grigson's Fruit BookGood Things in England by Florence WhiteThe Taste of Britain by Laura Mason & Catherine BrownThe Scots Kitchen by F. Marion McNeillPrevious blog posts pertinent to today's episode:Read Neil Cooks Grigson...

After our double header history fest on Jutland with Nick Jellicoe its time to get back to basics with a special episode on Wargames Terrain. My guest is Joe Bilton aka @Joe_Wargamer on Twitter (sorry Elon, its Twitter mate) who during the 5 years or so he has been in the hobby has produced some superb quality tables with an emphasis on more realistic terrain. His day job is creating maps for Wargames, mostly Role Play and Fantasy style stuff but with an increasing amount of historical stuff chucked in, here's a link to the company http://www.heroicmaps.com/ All the usual sections are there and we have a cracking entry into Room 101, I can feel the Twitters lighting up already ! The final section of the show is a deep dive into terrain making with some top tips and ideas for improving the look of our wargames tables. My next guest will be Pete from TAG, I'm a big fan of The Assault Groups Italian Wars figures so I'm really looking forward to that one. Sit back and relax with a nice brew and a Garibaldi and enjoy the episode. Until next time, Sithee Regards Ken The Yarkshire Gamer

This bonus episode is in fact a pilot for a new podcast show I have made with Sam Bilton and Alessandra Pino.Enjoy! In the very first episode, Neil is presenting and gives everyone a free choice as to what topic they want to talk about, as long as it begins with A of course. Alessandra goes for apples, Neil chooses absinthe and Sam looks into adulteration.Links to things mentioned in this episode:‘13 Magical Ways to Use Apples'Glyn Hughes' Alan Turin sculpture‘Lancashire man poisoned after eating cherry seeds' article on BBC News‘How Did La Belle Époque Become Europe's Golden Age?' article on The Collector‘Site of "The Absinthe Murders"' article on Atlas ObscuraThe Apple Tree (1952) by Daphne du MaurierHallowe'en Party (1969) by Agatha ChristieThe July Ghost (1982) by A.S. ByattJoin our free Substack to get extra bonus features: https://substack.com/profile/147444179-sam-bilton Anything to add? Don't forget we want to hear your suggestions for future topics.Contact the pod:email: aisforapplepod.gmail.comSocial media:twitter/X: @aisforapplepodInstagram: @aisforapplepod_This podcast uses the following third-party services for analysis: Chartable - https://chartable.com/privacy

In today's episode I am talking to returning guest and friend of the show food historian and writer Sam Bilton about her new book The Philosophy of Chocolate published by the British Library. Today Sam and I talk about how the peoples of Mesoamerica took their chocolate, how it came to Britain, chocolate houses, the sexualisation of chocolate, and the Cadbury's Crème Egg Controversy, amongst other things.Find out more about the Philosophy of Chocolate here.There are 2 Easter eggs associated with this episode. To become a £3 monthly subscriber, and access them and other premium content, or to buy me a virtual pint or coffee to support the running of the blogs and podcast click here.Links to things mentioned in today's episode:Sam's podcast Comfortably HungryA Flake ad from in 1980sA Flake ad from the 1990sThe Cadbury's Caramel rabbitSam's social media handles:Twitter/Insta/Threads: @mrssbiltonBluesky: @mrssbilton.bsky.socialSam's website: sambilton.com Previous episodes pertinent to today's episode:Lent Episode 3: Pagan Lent & EasterA Dark History of Chocolate with Emma KayThe Philosophy of Curry with Sejal SukhadwalaGingerbread with Sam BiltonSaffron with Sam BiltonTripe SpecialNeil's blogs:‘British Food: a History' ‘Neil Cooks Grigson' Neil's books:Before Mrs Beeton: Elizabeth Raffald, England's Most Influential HousekeeperA Dark History of Sugar Both are published by Pen & Sword and available from all good bookshops. Don't forget, there will be postbag episodes in the future, so if you have any questions or queries about today's episode, or indeed any episode, or have a question about the history of British food please email Neil at neil@britishfoodhistory.com, or on twitter...

Today, we're honored to feature Rachel Bilton, whose unique nursing approach has earned praise from the Canberra community. Rachel's passion for palliative care shines as she emphasizes the importance of creating a safe and caring environment during end-of-life journeys. Learn how her nursing skills, beyond clinical expertise, play a crucial role in alleviating suffering through small, thoughtful gestures.Rachel also shared her insights into potential career shifts, her dedication to nursing's unique opportunities, and her strategies for addressing patient fears during end of life. Ready to elevate your nursing practice? Share this inspiring episode featuring Rachel Bilton with your colleagues, and let's empower more nurses to thrive on their own terms. Key takeaways:04:53 - Exploring Unplanned Endings and Surprising Bonds in Oncology for Improved Patient Care13:16 - Single Mother Prioritizes Childcare Over Employment19:34 - Specific list led to unexpected autonomy.23:51 - Positive feedback, unique services, unlikely clients.27:07 - Graduate qualifications in Australia are expensive.31:54 - Amazing presenter in palliative care.38:07 - Nursing builds clinical and mental capacity.39:28 - Building, hyperstimulation, frazzled, sloppy, unique role in palliative care.44:26 - Nursing: relieving suffering and bringing happiness.49:58 - Basic things matter. 5 Ways we can support you in your nursing career ✅Join our Free Nurse Career Growth Hub and access our free nursing application, interview and career growth guides here!Join our Nurse Career Academy and work with us to help guarantee your next nursing role!Book a free Career Clarity Call with Liam to discuss your career situation!Join our private FB community to surround yourself with like minded nurses!Check out our Youtube Channel for more nurse career support!

Kate and Oliver are joined by two siblings who didn't know the other existed until they were adults: Chrysta Bilton, author of "Normal Family: On Truth, Love, and How I Met My 35 Siblings" and Evan Scott. They share their incredible story, discuss nature vs. nurture, forgiveness, setting boundaries, and much more.Executive Producers: Kate Hudson and Oliver HudsonProduced by Allison BresnickEdited by Josh WindischMusic by Mark HudsonThis show is powered by Simplecast.This episode is sponsored by:Helix (helixsleep.com/sibling)Sakara (sakara.com/sibling)

This episode features Luke Bilton, co-founder of Life Science Networks, The conversation focuses on the power of community building. Here are a few of the topics we cover: How different event technology companies fared coming out of the Covid pandemic Why matchmaking and a well-structured meeting program is the secret sauce for events The gap in the market for engaging online communities in specific sectors with pharma and life sciences  Why there has never been a better time to launch a company or community The role of content in community building Skift Meetings is defining the future of business events. Visit our website for the latest news, reports, reviews, and events.

Episode Notes [Warning: The following episode contains sudden loud noises, as well as depictions of unsafe driving. Listener discretion is advised.] Clem Bianchi needs to get some work done on the Kind Starlight, but doesn't have enough cash to make the magic happen. When they take a side job, they encroach on pizza delivery driver turf - the land of the mail courier's oldest rival. A fast rivalry with a passionate pizza pusher turns into an all-out drag race across the streets of Volnutt, with a 10-year-old's birthday party hanging in the balance. Starring: Kai Swanson as Clem Bianchi; Felix Kingsley as DOGA; Vanessa Sweet as Ginny John; Pi Crosby as Zavier Austin; Danny Boyd as Bilton; Anna Stien as Gestiny Austin; and Jay Petrequin, Roma Ostman, Sam Ishmael, Max Newland and Chris Hutton as the ensemble. Additional Postage Required is created by Jay Petrequin. "Freaky Fast" was written and co-produced by Chris Hutton, and directed and edited by Jay Petrequin. The show's opening theme, "Kind Starlight," was written and produced by Jay Petrequin and Tim LaMarque. Sounds and music are courtesy of the Soundstripe sound archive, freesound.org and the FilmCow sound effect library. Podcast artwork by Gary Calupo. APR on Patreon APR on Twitter Additional Postage Required is part of the Moonshot Podcast Network. All Freesound.org sounds are licensed under a Creative Commons 0 license. Freesound.org sound effects used in this episode: Empty Corridor of a Spacecraft by Vospi; SYNTH Transition Sound FX in D 124 bpm by DymaiSound;Small Crowd pre-concert talking party bar walla talking by JohnsonBrandEditing; Footsteps one person CLEAN.wav by RaggedyAngst; garage busy mechanics working conversations good vibe very light bg music Montreal, Canada.flac by kyles; Kids play party by Engangskameraten; Clank Car Crash Collision by qubodup. This podcast is powered by Pinecast.

Chrysta Bilton, author of Normal Family: On Truth, Love, and How I Met My 35 Siblings, joins Julia to discuss her book.  Get ready for an exhilarating story. Chrysta shares what life was like for a child born of a lesbian mother and her father, who donated sperm for a living.  Her family was bold, sometimes dysfunctional, and anything but traditional.  Chrysta tells her story in a truthful, enlightening, engaging, and sometimes funny way.  You'll hear about alcoholism, shame, lies, schizophrenia, cryobanks, self-perception, nurture versus nature, and how Chrysta navigated through it all to become a successful wife, parent, sibling, adult, and an author worth reading.  Don't miss this captivating episode of Stork'd.    IN THIS EPISODE:   [02:52] Chrysta Bilton provides an overview of her book  [05:25] Chrysta's sperm donor was misled by her mother and became a serial sperm donor for many children  [07:03] All of the players in this book come from different perspectives on their truth [11:54] Chrysta discovers her father struggled with schizophrenia and discovers she has many siblings. She has developed compassion for her father [16:41] Chrysta struggled for ten years, dealing with her upbringing.  She worked hard to analyze her circumstances, the mistakes she was making, and how to walk away from destructive behaviors [19:51] How her siblings relate to their “father” and each other [23:28] Advice on what to tell a child conceived by a donor. Nurture versus nature and how her parents' backgrounds form who they became  [31.25] Chrysta shares her views on the pros and cons of cryobanks and the obligation they have to women [35:39] Chrysta tells how the book came about, how she parented her sister, and her self-evaluation  [45:30] What is the definition of a family   KEY TAKEAWAYS:   Avoid emotional pain for a child conceived by a donor. Instead, tell them the truth about their conception.   Be emotionally healed before starting a family, whether it be traditional, single parenting, or a sperm donation. Children deserve your best self. Change and heal and make better choices.  Forgive your parents and stop blaming them for everything wrong that happens in your life.   RESOURCE LINKS:   The Book:  Normal Family   Chrysta Bilton - LinkedIn    Chrysta Bilton - Instagram   Chrysta Bilton - Twitter   Stork'd - Facebook    Stork'd - Instagram   Stork'd- YouTube   About Chrysta Bilton:   Chrysta Bilton is an American author who lives in Los Angeles, CA, with her husband and two children. Normal Family is her first book.

You can also check out this episode on Spotify!Family dynamics are complicated—but what happens when you learn that you have dozens (and possibly hundreds) of siblings? When writer Chrysta Bilton's mom decided to build a family as a gay woman in the early 80s, she employed a sperm donor. This man also played a role in Chrysta and her sister's life as “dad.” But he continued to donate to other women—in secret—for almost 10 years. Chrysta learned this shocking truth from an article in the New York Times. On this episode, Chrysta joins Dr. McBride to discuss family secrets, shame, her unconventional coming-of-age story, and how all of this affected her mental and physical health. Chrysta's critically acclaimed memoir “Normal Family: On Truth, Love, and How I Met My 35 Siblings,” is available now.Join Dr. McBride every Monday for a new episode of Beyond the Prescription. You can subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or at lucymcbride.com/podcast.Get full access to her free weekly Are You Okay? newsletter at https://lucymcbride.substack.com/welcomePlease be sure to like, rate, review — and enjoy — the show!The transcript of our conversation is here!Dr. McBride: My family is everything to me. I think a lot about how they're like me and they're not like me. And there are many ways they're not like me, that they're so lucky not to be like me. And there are things that I've inherited from my parents that I'm grateful for, and there are things that I would maybe tweak a little bit. But I think all of us need to recognize how much we have in our genetic profile that we take for granted sometimes, and then [00:00:30] how much we're capable of change even though we may think we're just genetically programmed to be, you know, forgetful or not ask for directions when we're lost. I guess my point is it's good to reflect on where we came from, it's good to reflect on where we're going, and it's good to kind of sketch out in our minds where we fit in our family dynamic because that informs a lot of our daily health habits, the way we think, the way we feel. And today's guest is [00:01:00] such an important example of someone who's reflected deeply on what it means to be part of a family that became a lot bigger than she ever knew. Hello, and welcome to my office. I'm Dr. Lucy McBride, and this is "Beyond the Prescription," the show where I talk with my guests like I do my patients, pulling the curtain back on what it means to be healthy, redefining health as more than the absence of disease. [00:01:30] As a primary care doctor for over 20 years, I've realized that patients are much more than their cholesterol and their weight, that we are the integrated sum of complex parts. Our stories live in our bodies. I'm here to help people tell their story, to find out are they okay, and for you to imagine and potentially get healthier from the inside out. You can subscribe to my weekly newsletter at lucymcbride.substack.com [00:02:00] and to the show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts. So, let's get into it and go beyond the prescription. What defines a family? What are the ingredients for healthy family relationships? What happens to us mentally and physically when family secrets are kept, and then when they are revealed? These are some of the important questions Chrysta Bilton explores in her critically acclaimed memoir, "Normal Family: [00:02:30] On Truth, Love, and How I met My 35 Siblings." In it, Chrysta describes how she learned that she has dozens, if not hundreds of siblings, the offspring of sperm donor Number 150 from the California Cryobank, and how she has reckoned with her past to better understand herself, what is nature, what is nurture, and how she cares for her mental and physical health. Chrysta, thank you so much for joining me today. Chrysta: Thank you so much for having me. I really admire [00:03:00] what you're doing with this podcast. I'm so grateful to be here. Dr. McBride: I appreciate that. And I wanna start with your mother who sounds like a real character. I mean, I kind of loved her from the minute I learned about who she was. She was a lesbian in the early '80s, desperate to have a family when a lot of sperm banks wouldn't even let gay women participate. So, tell me what she did. Chrysta: Yeah. They wouldn't allow gay women or single women for that matter. So, it was a different time. I think we forget how [00:03:30] far we've come, at least in certain parts of the country, in terms of homophobia. But in the '70s and '80s, even '50s and '60s, when my mom was growing up, everyone was closeted at that time. When she decided she wanted to have a family in her 30s after getting sober from drug addiction and, you know, dealing with a whole host of other stuff from her chaotic upbringing, what she wanted more than anything was to have this family. But she didn't know a single gay person who had had kids. You know, she knew women who were in marriages who were maybe on the side exploring their sexuality, [00:04:00] but she didn't know a single person who had set out to do this out in the open. And, you know, I describe a comical journey that she has to trying to find a father or, you know, a sperm donor for her kid. She starts with this place called the Repository of Germaninal Choice, which in the early '80s was this...basically this traveling salesman type man with a briefcase who she'd read about in the "LA Times" or "The New York Times" who'd come to your home with a binder filled with what he called, like, Nobel laureate sperm donors. And you'd flip through these [00:04:30] anonymous men with no pictures and she picked a mathematics prodigy. And that was gonna be my sperm donor. And she tried to get pregnant and she didn't. And then she got spooked and hired a PI to get a photo of this would-be mathematics prodigy. And this very unattractive professor photo came back and she was like, "You know what? I need to know the father of my kids and I want him to be good-looking." These were her criteria for what she wanted. So, she went on this manhunt and my very handsome model, musician, actor, [00:05:00] man who would become my father walked into a hair salon in Beverly Hills and she was like, "That's it. That's the one." And she took this man to lunch and paid him $2,000 to give her sperm. And I refer to him as my dad, not a sperm donor because after that initial transaction, my mother realized that, you know, she was filled with shame about going about having a family in this different way. And she felt like maybe she was depriving me of something by not giving me a dad. So, she then paid this [00:05:30] man to play a role in my life and I knew him as dad. Dr. McBride: And he promised her at that time that he wouldn't donate sperm to anybody else, that you and your sister Kaitlyn would be the only offspring, yet he was making a living off of donating his sperm. Tell me about the moment that your mom learned about him not keeping that promise. Chrysta: Shortly after the hair salon transaction, she made him swear he would never do this for anyone else. And at the the time, he was just like, "Of course," because it's not like [00:06:00] women were coming up to him at hair salons on a daily basis and, you know, lesbian women asking him to father a child. But then it became more apparent why she was so adamant about this because shortly after that she took him to the California Cryobank, which was just starting at this time, to be tested for STDs and to test his sperm count. And he saw a bunch of men walking in and out of donation rooms and he was like, "Oh, now I understand. It's because she was gonna bring me here and she knew I'd get ideas." And he did. So, while he was [00:06:30] playing dad to us, he then donated to the California Cryobank for almost 10 years, 3 times a week. I think he was one of their most prolific sperm donors. And we did not learn about this until I was in my 20s. And through a wild series of events that I document in the book, my mother discovered it from a front-page story in "The New York Times" featuring my dad with his arm around one of these half-biological siblings. And it was a big story at the time because he was [00:07:00] one of the first anonymous sperm donors to "come out" and welcome all of his biological children to come meet him. So, yeah, that started a real nervous breakdown for my mother who, I think, already had a lot of shame around our family that was so different to the other families around us. But this was too different, I think, in her mind. Dr. McBride: And how long was it between that 2005 New York Times article where his story was revealed and you finding out that this man who is your father and not really always present in your [00:07:30] life but part of your life had fathered these other children? Chrysta: So, my mother decided that she would never tell us this story. And by the way, after "The New York Times" story, like, this was a huge story. Suddenly, you know, "60 Minutes" was calling to have my dad come on, and lots of newspapers were coming to interview him. There was a documentary film crew from Canada who were gonna document the story. So, I don't know how my mom thought she could keep this from us forever, but she did. And the only reason she finally sat down with me and my little sister to tell [00:08:00] us was because, again, through just a bizarre series of events, it turned out that I was most likely dating my half-brother, which I guess is, you know, what happens when sperm donation is that unregulated. That's the fear. It just happened to happen in my actual life. Dr. McBride: And so, that brought the conversation to a head. You had to know and she told you. Chrysta: That's right. Yeah. And that was a lot to unpack because she had never told me that she'd paid my father to have me. I was told that they were best friends who had had a kid [00:08:30] together, and she'd also never told me that he'd been financially incentivized to play the role of dad. So, even though she didn't say all that in that initial conversation about the siblings, it just alerted me to the fact, which I already in my gut knew that there was just so much more to the story of my conception and upbringing than my mother had told me. So, yeah, the book is a bit of a mystery because it's tracking me as I unpack what the real story was, if that makes sense. Dr. McBride: And so, what do you think holding [00:09:00] that secret in your mom's body and mind did to her? I mean, how did that affect her everyday life? Chrysta: You know, my mother was someone who had a lot of secrets, which of course stemmed from having a lot of shame. And beyond just the secret of my conception and the true nature of my mother and father's relationship, it turned out that there were quite a few really big life events that I didn't know about my mother. Like, I didn't know about her traumatic childhood, I didn't know about a couple really [00:09:30] heavy things that she had gone through. Shame is just such a powerful emotion. I think that's a big theme in my book, shame, because I inherited a lot of shame from my mom. You know, she was ashamed of being gay. I was ashamed of having a mother who was gay. She was ashamed of...you know, there was some suicide and some other really heavy stuff in her family history and alcoholism, and she was ashamed of all that. So, you know, the problem with keeping secrets is then you can't really be close to people because you're presenting a false self and you're not really your whole self. Yeah, [00:10:00] the book is sort of me mirroring that journey to being false. And then ultimately I wrote a book about it, so I guess it's all out in the open now. But yeah, I don't know, shame and secrets, it's a topic that I'm very interested in. Dr. McBride: Yeah. And I think shame is an almost universal experience that we all have and it does so much damage. And I think it propagates this notion that we need to keep things under the vest and we need to keep secrets. But the secrets perpetuate the shame and the shame perpetuates the secrets. And so, the treatment, if you will, is coming [00:10:30] clean and being honest about who we really are and showing up as ourselves and daring to be vulnerable, which isn't easy if you've experienced trauma in your life as it sounds like your mom did as a youngster. Chrysta: Yeah, that's absolutely right. You know, there's another piece of it too. So, the shame perpetuates the secrets and the secrets perpetuate the shame, but then also close you off to other people that you can only heal through those relationships, and I think through revealing those parts of yourself and then being loved in return, which, of course, you have to then have [00:11:00] healthy relationships to find that. I feel like people who have a lot of secrets and shame also sometimes seek out more unhealthy connection. Dr. McBride: So, you're a parent, Chrysta. I think sometimes as parents we struggle about what we should reveal to our kids about our past, our own struggles. I mean, I think some parents think that we should just cover that up and not talk about how hard things were because we don't wanna give our kids ideas, like telling your child that you smoked as an adolescent might give them an idea that they could smoke. When actually I think being honest and open with our [00:11:30] kids helps them feel less alone and helps them feel less shame because they too have ups and downs and struggles. And I wonder how the secret keeping in your family when you were being raised, how that affected your mom's parenting. Like, if you look back on how you were parented, can you see the traces of the secrets being held? Chrysta: Absolutely. I mean, there was so much going on beyond just the shame and the secrets. My mom also struggled with probably a mood disorder [00:12:00] and also severe drug and alcohol addiction. And so, even if I didn't know what was going on, it was clear that I was a parent to my mother from a very early age. And even if she said she wasn't drinking, it was still clear that things were insane. I just didn't understand the cause. So, I guess that's out of the bubble of just speaking about the shame and the secrets. But I definitely think that it was only as an adult and understanding both of my parents, like, their full story and biography, that I was able to [00:12:30] get over a lot of the resentment I had about some of the more dysfunctional ways that I was raised, and also find it's not as much forgiveness but just, like, so much compassion for both of them. Because I think when you understand people's stories, you just can't help but have compassion because everyone's been through things that shape them in some way. Dr. McBride: When your mom told you about the sperm bank donor at 150, what was your initial reaction? Anger, resentment, confusion? I mean, what went through your mind? Chrysta: You said earlier, you had said... What [00:13:00] I loved about the book is that, you know, I cried, I laughed and I was like, I think those were my two emotions. I didn't know if I should be completely overwhelmed and start hysterically crying or if I should burst into tears of laughter because it felt like growing up me and my little sister had been through so much. You know, my mom was involved in many pyramid schemes, so life was very boom or bust. We were on the verge of homelessness multiple times. She had her drug addiction up and down. She also had all these relationships with women who would come in for a few years and then leave. So, family was [00:13:30] so complicated to us already. It was just like, if this was going to happen to anyone we knew, of course, it would be us that potentially had hundreds of brothers and sisters because the universe has a great sense of humor and they just wanna throw one more thing at us, I guess. But yeah, I think at the time I was at a very fragile and vulnerable state because I had just gotten over an eating disorder. I was quitting drinking because I realized that I think I just had a biological propensity towards alcoholism and so I wanted to cut that as a possibility [00:14:00] early on. So, I was just doing a lot of healing work and this was just one thing too many to deal with at that time. So, I just shut the door on it and sort of pretended that it wasn't a thing for almost 10 years. You know, also, my father had become homeless at that point and that was a whole other thing emotionally to deal with for me. So, yeah, it was just too much at that time. But then once it was a different time in my life and I was in a better place, then it came back in a really interesting and powerful way. Dr. McBride: So, what allowed you to go [00:14:30] from kind of compartmentalizing it and sort of walling it off in your mind, this whole other life you potentially had, to inviting your siblings, the ones who were known, to, like, a family reunion? I mean, that's a big leap. Chrysta: That's a big leap. Yeah. I think just a lot of emotional maturity and also being in such a different place. You know, I'd had kids at that point, I had a loving partnership, I had really healed things with my mother [00:15:00] in many ways. So, I think that I was just like, you know, you can grow in stages, I think, and take on different challenges at different times. And I think it was just, "Okay, all the other areas of my life were pretty settled. Maybe I can look at this now." But also it was the way that one of the siblings came into my life. No one in my family was interested in art, but I really was. And I'd wound up after college where I'd studied writing, I'd wound up going to this tiny little art school in Italy called the Florence Academy of Art. I only [00:15:30] discovered that school through a random set of events. And it's like Renaissance painting. It's not exactly, you know, oil painting, it's just not really something that a lot of people you've encountered in life go to study. And one of my half-sisters studied there right after me as a coincidence. And that was just such an incredible coincidence. And, you know, we had all the same friends and we were so alike, but it was one of those sliding doors. Genetics is more powerful than nurture. It [00:16:00] was so much, it was so much to think about that I was... And she had grown up, you know, across the country in a very different family and we dressed the same, we had the same gardening books. So, when she reached out to me as opposed to other times when I'd been contacted by siblings and just sort of ignored it, I was like, "Wow, this is pretty crazy. Okay. I'll have one sister, one extra sister. I can get to know this one woman because we have so much in common and the universe has put us in this interesting situation." And then [00:16:30] what was fascinating to me is she had grown up thinking that the father who had raised her was her biological parent. And it was only through taking a DNA test on ancestry.com that she learned that she had a sperm donor. And I document some of her psychological experience with that in the book. But what was fascinating was that her attitude towards this larger biological family was so profoundly different from the attitude I had taken. Like, I thought, "Oh, this is one more thing to feel ashamed of and this is [00:17:00] so weird and strange." And for her she was like, "I have always been an only sibling, I always wanted a sister. And, oh my god, now I have dozens of sisters, maybe hundreds of sisters. And my life was so boring and this is just the most exciting thing that's ever happened. It's like a lifetime movie. This doesn't happen in real life," you know? So, she was excitedly getting to know all of the siblings that she could track down. And I was just confronted with such a different attitude towards the whole thing that [00:17:30] it occurred to me, "Oh, I could have that attitude. At any point, I could just choose to see this completely differently." And that was really powerful. So, I did. So, I sort of just took her lead and, you know, she suggested, she's like, "Why don't we do a family reunion?" And I was like, "Okay. I'll host it. I'm big sister, it's appropriate." Dr. McBride: That's amazing. I mean, when you were gathered around with all of your different half-siblings, what were the similarities among you? What were the threads that were, like, undoubtedly [00:18:00] genetic and biological? Can you think of any? Chrysta: Yeah. Well, to start with the physical similarities are uncanny. Physically, I take more after my mother, but my little sister Kaitlyn looks exactly like our dad. And I would say that maybe 80% to 90% of the siblings look exactly like my dad. So, you know, anyone who came over that weekend, it was like an episode of "The Twilight Zone" because when we were just all standing next to each other, we just all looked like siblings. But there are a lot of us. You know, beyond the physical, we all have a different [00:18:30] mother and we all shared completely different upbringings. But still just as a scientific case study of all these people who come from the same sperm donor, it's fascinating. The great majority of us have ADD, which, you know, I know is proven to be already a very biological thing. So, that manifested in, you know, the first night we went out to a restaurant, all of our phones are always at 1%. We're very spacey, we lose things all the time. I'm sure somewhere in this conversation I'll trail off. So, as we're leaving the restaurant, the waiter comes running after [00:19:00] us with, like, four sets of keys, three phones, two purses. And it's this hilarious moment of, "Oh my god, this is just bizarre." Dr. McBride: And this is family. Chrysta: And this is family. Yes, absolutely. And it's been pretty cool. Since coming out with the book, I realized that there's also this whole community, it's called the NPE community, which is the Not Parent Expected. I didn't even know that was a community, but it is. And it's people, you know, who were adopted and never told, or who had a sperm donor and [00:19:30] were never told. Again, I think the origin of never telling is often rooted in shame. But those kids gain a lot from knowing about their biological origins. And even just seeing in my sibling group, the kids who were never told, they described things about themselves that they could never relate to their biological family that confused them or made them feel out of place, and then just knowing the information, looking in the mirror, and seeing a different person. So, that wasn't my experience. I knew [00:20:00] my father, but that's such fascinating psychological material to work with. Dr. McBride: Yeah. I mean, in medicine, you know, we talk about nature and nurture, right? We talk about what is inherited, what is fixed, and then what is environmental, situational. And, you know, when you're trying to help someone become healthier in some way, you always try to kind of tease apart what is something you can't control and what is something you can. And what's so interesting in hearing you talk right now is, you know, you had these, like, [00:20:30] fixed commonalities, like, these facial features, maybe hair color, maybe even ADD, which I think is nature and nurture, but it's a lot of nature, and then there are these experiences that you had that were completely different. Some of you were told from the beginning that you had a sperm donor and some were not. And the psychological impact of that on people's health is huge. And that's really where I would as a doctor, if someone was struggling with, like, addiction or disordered eating and having had that background, I would [00:21:00] suggest they lean into that sort of nurture part because that's where you can reclaim some sense of agency and control over your story, or what you tell yourself about where you came from. Because I think the...as you outline in your book, for you and for your siblings, the dishonesty, which I don't think was intentional, but the withholding of the truth really does so much harm to people, when I think in your mom's case, she was just trying to protect you. Chrysta: Yeah. I think in a lot of these parents' [00:21:30] cases. You know, I think at the time, we talked about we've come so far, you know, now there are books, you know, whether it's a gay family raising a kid or a single parent. Like, there are specific books where you can start introducing those ideas in sweet age-appropriate ways from very early on. But none of that material existed back then. And often these sperm banks were advising parents not to tell their kids. And, you know, there's all kinds of fear like where it's the case of a heterosexual couple and the man is infertile, I think there's shame in that. And so, [00:22:00] you know, "Will this child not love me the same if they think that I'm not biologically connected to them?" And so, I have so much compassion for the reasons why the parents didn't tell the truth. That's not shared by all of the siblings. Sometimes there's a lot of anger around it. Dr. McBride: I'm sure. But to me, that's sort of the varsity head space if you can get there, is like I'm sure you've experienced some anger and frustration towards your mom. I mean, that would be kind of weird if you didn't. I think we all have that and I think my kids are probably stewing at me right this minute as we speak for some reason. But anger then can [00:22:30] become curiosity which can become understanding, and that can lead to empathy and compassion. And that's where I hope I am with my parents, and I hope we can all get because I think, you know, as parents we're doing the best we can and we sometimes think that withholding information is the right thing to do when actually kids are more perceptive and intuitive than we sometimes give them credit. Chrysta: Yeah, absolutely. But I also think it's, like, of course, everything's age appropriate. Like, if you're [00:23:00] really stressed about something that you don't want them to take on, it's not necessarily something you wanna share with them at, you know, a certain age, of course. But yeah, these bigger things and especially as they are ready to deal with them or understand them, I think it's helpful to connect with your kids in that way. But, you know, I don't know, I have a seven-year-old and a five-year-old. I'm sure once I have teenagers, it'll be a whole other... Dr. McBride: Yeah. I mean, I think you're right, it has to be age-appropriate. You don't wanna share all of your dirty laundry with a five-year-old because that becomes a burden, and they can't handle emotionally a lot of information that [00:23:30] they can't relate to or understand. But I also think that kids have a sixth sense and know when we're not being authentic or honest. My kids are teenagers now and I actually love this phase of parenting because they're so able to understand things in meaningful ways, and so you can really be honest with them, it's great. But you also don't wanna be, you know...I never wanna be the person who is, like, the kid's best friend because I feel like they need the knowledge that we have, like, some guardrails and boundaries, and that we are still the authority even if we don't act like one every day. [00:24:00] What does your life look like now vis-a-vis these half-siblings? Are they part of your life? Do you connect with them? What is that like? Chrysta: Yeah. Some of the siblings call it more like a cousin relationship. I always had a very small family with the exception of my mom's girlfriends who would come in and out. But when you have so many, it's impossible to have deep relationships with all of them. There are now siblings whose names I don't know. You know, it starts with trying to keep track of their pets or their birthdays, and then it's just information overload and you sort of remember one key [00:24:30] detail that separates one person from another, like where they're from or what they're interested in. But what I have is close relationships with some of them, whether that's through common interest, or you know, location, being close by because they're all over the U.S. We're still waiting for our first international sibling. I'm sure it exists but... You know, my core family is me, my husband, my kids, and my mom, and my sister that I grew up with. But there are now this rich extended family that I see, you know, a few times [00:25:00] a year. And, you know, also all the siblings, you know, originally they were on Facebook and then they moved to WhatsApp, and then WhatsApp became incredibly overwhelming because you'd go on and after a few days of not being on, and there'd be, like, 500 new messages, and all on one thread and you just couldn't keep up. So, then we moved to this app called Discord, which is sort of like Slack if you're familiar with that, where you can organize by topic. So, genealogy is a topic, politics is a topic. You know, everyone's very passionate about their views even though their views [00:25:30] can be on either side of the spectrum. So, that's also hilarious. Dr. McBride: Can you talk to me a little bit about...? It sounds like you had an eating disorder, you had a wobbly relationship with alcohol. I mean, how much do you think that was genetic and how much do you think was environmental? Chrysta: You know what? There was some point at which my husband was getting to know me, which he was really the first person I ever really opened up to about the truth. You know, around adolescence, I had started lying about what was happening at home. I was ashamed that we had financial struggles, I [00:26:00] was ashamed of my mom being gay, I was ashamed of her alcohol...like, so many things. So, I was very much a fake person for a lot of my life. And I think that contributed to the eating disorder and the substance abuse because alcohol, I think, made me feel comfortable in social settings where I had this horrible anxiety otherwise. Dr. McBride: How did the eating disorder serve you in the time you kind of "needed it?" Chrysta: I think it gave me a sense of control when my family situation was so out of control. You know, my father was [00:26:30] living in the streets and my mom was at one point in a halfway house or in rehab for coke addiction, and I was taking care of my little sister like I was the mom and it was just a tremendous amount of responsibility, I think, early on. And I think that the eating disorder gave me a sense of control. And there was also this strange element of wanting to be childlike. And so, my physicality suddenly became, like, almost prepubescent, if that makes... It's very bizarre. [00:27:00] I wanted to be taken care of and there was some sort of reaction people would give me like, "Oh you're so delicate." I could just... I don't know, it played into something.  Dr. McBride: Yeah. I think we make the mistake in assuming that girls or boys who are suffering from anorexia are just vain or they wanna fit into their jeans. I think it's so much more complicated. I had a patient recently who was starving herself consciously and then sort of unconsciously because she was experiencing gender dysphoria and didn't wanna menstruate. [00:27:30] I mean, I think we can't assume that the path to these disorders, whether it's a relationship with food or alcohol are kind of one size fits all. Chrysta: Yeah. I mean, I'm sure there was a vanity to it as well. I had had a really abusive boyfriend in high school that continued for many years and, you know, he had started calling me pudgy. And so, there was an element of wanting to, like, be loved. But I think it played into I wasn't getting my needs met and it was like I had just somehow indulged [00:28:00] in something nurturing. I was, like, gonna deprive myself of that rather than allow others to be depriving me of it because I couldn't control...I don't know, it's complicated. I don't pretend to be a psychologist. Dr. McBride: I think what you're hitting on is what so many people with disordered eating struggle with. I mean, it's a physical, psychological, and mental health manifestation of not having your emotional needs met. And instead of identifying that and then trying to problem solve for it, which you may have not been capable of at that age, you're sort of [00:28:30] channeling all of this distress into the attempt to control your body. Chrysta: Yeah, totally. So, recovering from some of that stuff definitely happened in stages. Like, the first thing I worked on was my eating disorder because it got pretty bad. You know, I'm 5'6 and I got down to, like, 95 pounds. I went into a school doctor when I was in college just because I felt ill and they could notice. They noticed how much I weighed and they started asking me questions about my eating. And for whatever reason, I don't know if it was this [00:29:00] overriding desire to be healthy because I was both anorexic and bulimic. And so, I admitted that I sometimes threw up, enough to give this woman who I was speaking to plenty of red siren warning signs. And so, for whatever reason she just made me sign away that I would go into treatment for that. And so, I started seeing a therapist once a week. And luckily, I think when you catch that disorder pretty early, I had only been in it for two years, two or three years, I think there's a lot more success rate than people who have been struggling with it for a long time. So, I started seeing this [00:29:30] wonderful therapist. And she was working on some of the psychological piece, but she also just wanted me to gain weight. And so, even though I wasn't necessarily figuring out all the reasons why I was anorexic, I would just sit at the plate and, like, force myself to eat. So, I'm really grateful that I'm fully recovered. I don't struggle with it at all. Dr. McBride: It's incredible that you must have had very good treatment because a lot of people don't fully recover and never do. It's so interesting that you say the thing about the...just eating. You know, my patients who have anorexia get [00:30:00] so mad at me or the nutritionist, or the psychologist that they're being forced to eat when they're like, "I'd rather just talk about what's going on and what the roots of this are." Or, they just don't wanna do it at all, but... Chrysta: They just don't wanna get to it yet. So, they're like, "Let's stall." Dr. McBride: Well, they wanna be the one anorexic in the history of treatment who can stay underweight and underfed. They think that there's, like, a workaround. But the reason you have to eat before you talk about the feelings is because until you're fed, you can't really get to the root causes. I mean, if you're underfed, your brain just isn't [00:30:30] working properly. So, vitamin F is the most important ingredient, food, for then uncovering what the root causes are and connecting the dots between what's happened in your life and what's happening in your mind to then be healthy. Chrysta: Definitely. Yeah. And there's this concept that I was introduced to, which in general I think with getting healthy over things is, like, contrary action. So, it's like even while you're maybe sitting with a therapist and talking about all the reasons why you do something that you know to be dysfunctional, you can do that but [00:31:00] you can also just behave in the way that you know is the functional way. Dr. McBride: Yes. Chrysta: Even if it's against your instincts. And then sometimes the behavior can lead to the health too. Like, it can be a reverse. Dr. McBride: Yes, you're exactly right. You can stop drinking even though you may have convinced yourself, you know, "This is just temporary and I probably am fine drinking," which will then reinforce your recovery and you can talk in AA or with a therapist about the reasons behind why you drink too [00:31:30] much and kind of hit it from both angles. So, there's the practical, the psychological way of getting ourselves out of behaviors that are self-sabotaging. So, it sounds like, for you, the disordered eating and the alcohol served a purpose. Chrysta: And relationships as well. I would say that my biggest addiction was to toxic relationships, both female friendships and men that I was attracted to. With the nurture side, you can understand why I had loved my mother who was a drug addict, and [00:32:00] that there are patterns to that type of relationship that you get into. So, I was very attracted to men who just could not show up for me emotionally, or who I had to say because ultimately they couldn't meet my needs. So, it took a lot of work to get over that one too. Dr. McBride: Yeah, that's a big one and one we commonly see, you know, in the world and I see and my patients and in friends. I think the saying is that we're comfortably uncomfortable, right? It's like you know your discomfort, and so then you gravitate to repeat history. It's like a repetition [00:32:30] compulsion that we have until the light bulb goes on and you're like, "Wait a minute. This relationship is not serving me. It's actually unhealthy." So, when did that happen for you vis-a-vis relationships? Chrysta: That one happened later. So, I'd say I, like, hit the eating disorder then the addiction, then even though I had recovered from those things, I was in this, I would say I was addicted to this guy that I had been on and off for 10 years. And I tell a little bit of that crazy story in the book, but that's just a sliver. And he was physically abusive and psychologically, and I think [00:33:00] just mentally unwell. I actually don't think he was a bad person. I just think he had a real mental illness but I could just not stay away from this person. And I think it was only when we started talking about kids and I was like, "Oh." There was this instinct where I was, like, for whatever reason, I could allow someone to treat me that way. But when I suddenly imagine little kids in the picture, that was the thing that allowed me to finally end that relationship. Thank goodness. I think just because I had had, you know, my parents, who I do have [00:33:30] so much compassion for, I think they had been really hurt in their childhood and then they had not fully healed enough that they could parent in a healthy way. And I think just not wanting to do that to a kid was really the thing. Dr. McBride: Well, you had clearly suffered so much in your childhood and you'd already worked so hard to get through the disordered eating and the alcohol issue. I don't wanna put words in your mouth, but it sounds like you just didn't wanna pass on any of that chaos to the extent you have control over that as a parent. Chrysta: Yeah. No, that's exactly right. Which of course doesn't mean that [00:34:00] like, "Oh, now there are no challenges and it's..." you know, life continues to throw challenges in your way. But to the extent that there's stuff I can do that I can work on, yeah, you know, trying. There's progress, not perfection. Dr. McBride: That's right. So, what's your relationship with your mother like now? Chrysta: Oh, it's a great relationship. I'm so happy to say she's sober for more than a decade. And I'm still very much her parent and there's some codependency there on her side. So, it's not like, oh, we completely went to a [00:34:30] normal relationship. Like, she sometimes accidentally calls me mom. You know, I take full financial care of her, which at one point was a real stress but is now okay. Thank goodness. But she is an extraordinary grandparent and she's just a really beautiful person.  Dr. McBride: That's incredible. It's really a testament to your sort of inner strength and also just the work you've done that you have so much compassion and forgiveness for her. Because like I said in the beginning, it's really the book is kind of, like, a love letter to her, which you [00:35:00] wouldn't expect because, you know, things started out pretty chaotically. Chrysta: Yeah. You know, the big thing that stopped me from writing this book, you know, even before I knew about the siblings, I was compelled to write the story of me and my mother. And I would do various drafts throughout the years. And I think there was one time when I'd accidentally left a draft on my computer and she'd found it and she went to hysterics, and she was so upset and she couldn't believe I was writing this thing. And so, I think I put the project down for, like, 10 years because I was like I didn't wanna hurt my mom because there was a lot of challenging [00:35:30] material in that book. And I think that I was also worried that beyond getting over the hump of her feelings about it, which was a long process, it was also not wanting readers to judge her. And, you know, everyone's like, "I have all these problems with my mom," but as soon as you hear other people telling you, "Oh, she was a terrible mother," you take offense to that even if you hold sometimes those views. But I've been pleasantly surprised that for the most part, of course, you know, once you get [00:36:00] a lot of readers, people have divergent views. But for the most part, people have loved the character of my mother. And she is a character. I would say that there's never been anyone like her. Dr. McBride: If you're listening to this, you have to read this book not only because of the story of the sperm donor and your myriad siblings but because of your mom. And you paint her in a very empathetic, protective, and beautiful light. Chrysta: Oh, thanks. Yeah, I tried to bridge the gap I think between being honest because it got hard, you know, when she was doing lines in the carpool [00:36:30] for our high school, things got dark. But I think sometimes it's also good to see stories of that, and then see that you can get through it and out of it. Of course, that's not everyone's. My dad is still on the streets. So, it's not like it's a perfect Hollywood ending, although he's happy in his way with that. Dr. McBride: So, what would you say, what is a family? What defines a family? Is it the people that we are genetically connected to, or is it people that you cultivate a relationship with? Chrysta: I think it's different for [00:37:00] every single person and there's, like, a journey to figuring out what that is for you. But I'd say that whatever you define family as, it's such an important component of mental health to feel that you have a family, and even if you're building that. You know, I know some people that grew up in situations where they couldn't find peace with their parent because it wasn't...you know, maybe it was someone who had more ill intentions or had really done serious damage. So, I would never say, like, go find peace with that person. My conception of family is ever-changing. [00:37:30] But you've definitely built family through shared experiences. So, even if biology brings people into my life, it doesn't become family until you've spent time together. Dr. McBride: And I think, to me, family is also about shared vulnerability. It's about feeling safe to kind of show up as our true authentic selves, and it's about being seen and being heard. And it's also, to me at least, about people celebrating your [00:38:00] wins with you, and then mourning your losses with you, and being there for the highs and the lows. Chrysta: Yeah, the people that you share your deepest life with, I would say. Dr. McBride: That's right. So, Chrysta, what do you do now in your everyday life to maintain your health? Let's start with mental health first. Not that mental and physical health are separate. In fact, that's the whole point of this podcast. But what do you do to maintain your mental health? Chrysta: I would say spending time with loved ones, trying to be a good person, you know, trying to be a present [00:38:30] parent. I'm still sober, I participate in some groups through that. Speaking of the biological component, like, I am on an SSRI, and that helped me a lot. And whether that's nature or nurture, a lot of the siblings are also on meds. So, I don't know that's important to mention as well, I think. Because, like, I could never meditate until I was on that and people would be like, "If you just meditated, it would go away." And I was like, "Well." Dr. McBride: I'm really glad you mentioned the SSRI part because it is always a question, "Is my anxiety disorder, is [00:39:00] my depression genetic or is it environmental? Should I be doing therapy or meds? Should I be doing both?" And I think we can't really measure in blood or with testing, like, how much someone's emotional health or emotional challenges are genetic and how much are environmental. But there's a role for medication. I completely agree with the people who say that we have, in many ways, medicalized the human condition and that we're over-prescribing Prozac. But [00:39:30] I only believe that when we're talking about not understanding the person in their deepest truest sense and simply prescribing a pill and assuming that the pill will do the work. But for so many of my patients, and it sounds like for you, the medication is just another tool in the toolkit in addition to the work you do in sober groups, the work you do in therapy, and then just showing up as you are. And so, I think it's really important to destigmatize medication. It's [00:40:00] not a crutch, it's a tool like all the other things you do. Chrysta: Totally. Also, like, I don't know that it would've worked had I not been able to do all the work to get over some of the things. I don't know if I'd medicate and then suddenly my eating disorder would've gone. I had to do a lot of work on that and I had to do a tremendous amount of therapy to get out of my abusive relationship cycle, and I had to do a ton of work to be sober. But after I had done all that work, and I would say I did a ton of it, I still had this crippling anxiety. I did [00:40:30] have a block against medication in my brain and it took a lot...you know, and I don't know what exactly that block was, but I remember seeing the psychologist and he is like, "Let's just say, I'm not saying there's any proof that this is the case, but let's say that taking this takes one year off your life, but the rest of those years that you live, you're a less anxious person, would you still take it?" I was like, "Yeah, that would be great." And so, I was like, "What is that thing?" And he is like, "Also you could just get right off, you know, in a responsible way with a..." And I had also seen because I came from a family of drug addiction, I was [00:41:00] very terrified of pills because I had worked so hard to be sober and, you know, that's why I have ADD and I don't medicate for it because I'm like, "There is some possibility of abuse there. I don't wanna go anywhere near it." Not saying that people shouldn't. But finally, I was like, "Look, I've done all this work and for some reason, this is still happening. Maybe I don't need it forever, but I'll try it." And it really helped me. Dr. McBride: Yeah. I think some of the reasons that people get hung up on these medications and not taking them when they're appropriate is exactly what you said. They're afraid of kind of losing control. Maybe this wasn't your situation, but they're afraid [00:41:30] of being, you know, labeled as, like, mentally ill officially if they're on medication or they think they can just do more work, which is, of course, noble and valiant and wonderful and needed. But, for example, Prozac is not gonna make an anorexic eat necessarily. Food is more important than serotonin at that moment, right? All the work you did kind of laid the groundwork for, I would imagine, the SSRI helping with that, whatever, 5%, 10% of anxiety that needed to be turned down on [00:42:00] the volume knob. And by the way, you're not gonna probably have a year lopped off of your life because of the SSRI. I would argue that you'll probably live longer because you won't have all this unnecessary cortisol and adrenaline coursing through your veins, like, raising your blood pressure and heart rate. And again, it's not a panacea. And that's the mistake we make, I think, is that you know it's gonna do the work then it's gonna fix all of our problems when actually, you know, just, like, going for a brisk walk or you know, connecting with an old friend. Like, that's just part of the [00:42:30] puzzle. Chrysta: A hundred percent. Yeah. Dr. McBride: And then what do you do for your physical health now? I mean, do you exercise? Do you eat healthy? Chrysta: I do eat healthy. I indulge as well, but I eat very healthy. I don't cook. That was not part of our family tradition, but my husband thankfully does. So, I'm cooked five-star meals for most of my meals, which I'm very grateful for. I eat healthy and I need to start exercising, but that's maybe on this year's bucket list. I do have two small children. So, I would say that that is a very [00:43:00] physically active role, but I need to throw exercise into there for sure. Dr. McBride: I mean, it sounds like you're like most people. You do a lot of things well, you have aspirations, and then you're giving yourself a little break for not doing things perfectly. Tell me as a final question, if you could, what the process of writing this book and getting it out there in the world did for you in terms of kind of, I don't wanna say the word closure because that's too cliche or cute, but, like, what did it do psychologically to get this book out there in the [00:43:30] public? Chrysta: I think closure, yeah, it is cute, but I do think that there was an element of closure. I think there was also, like...talk about contrary action. Like, I had been so ashamed of the story for so long and it's sort of been eating inside me and now the story is fully out there. And I think that the deepest motivation for writing the book was that at different points in my life, memoirs specifically as a genre, but I guess literature as well in general, novels, contributed so much to me feeling less alone. You know, I read "Glass Castle." Dr. McBride: [00:44:00] I was gonna say you must have read "Glass Castle." Chrysta: Yeah. My sister brought it to me actually because she had been assigned it in school and she brought it to me, you know, in secret like it was, you know, the secret gift and she said, "You've gotta read this. It's our story." Even though it's not our story, our story is so different, but we just couldn't believe that a woman had been through this thing that she was so ashamed of and then she'd written a book and put it all out there and wasn't ashamed anymore. So, I think in that way, the stories are similar. But what I got so much from it was just feeling less [00:44:30] alone and feeling like, "Oh, I'm not in a place yet where I'm ready to share this story." You know, I think part of me thought in my own case, I was like, "No man is ever gonna marry me if he knows that I have this history of mental health, I have this crazy family. You know, no one's gonna ever sign up for this." I'm so glad that that didn't turn out to be true. But I think that memoirs specifically, I think when people vulnerably share their truth, it just helps you to frame your own truth. And so, I think that I had already gotten to a place where [00:45:00] I was more open. I just love memoir. And for whatever reason, I also just have this deep urge to tell this story from a really young age. And I don't know exactly, I can't fully understand why I had that deep urge, but it ate at me that I hadn't done it. And so, now I just feel a deep sense of relief that it's completed. I listened to another one of your podcast episodes, which was so wonderful with that amazing author "Corrections in Ink." And she said something about, like, she had [00:45:30] not had compassion for herself until she was rereading her book and could see herself as a character on the page. And I would say there was a really interesting psychological experience. I narrated the audiobook and rereading it through in one sitting, narrating it. I was just like, "Ooh, this little girl went through a lot." Dr. McBride: It sounds like you just followed your gut and your instinct to put this on paper, and it sounds like also you're now getting a flood of readers reaching out to you. You're also getting new [00:46:00] siblings, even last night. Chrysta: I don't know if that's the book. I think that's just coincidence. I don't think... You know, I mean, hey listen, maybe you're one of my siblings listening to this podcast... Dr. McBride: Maybe so. Chrysta: ...right now and you should go take an ancestry.com test. Dr. McBride: I'm going to, for sure. I think you've helped other people feel seen just like you did when you read "The Glass Castle." Chrysta: I have had such a diverse spread of readers reach out, people who discovered they had also biological siblings because they were the product [00:46:30] of a sperm donor, you know, young women who had a parent with substance abuse issues, mothers who had substance abuse issues, who read the book and were like, "I wanna get help." There have been so many different people that had a gay parent in the '70s and '80s and have never met another person. A few months ago I was at a fancy dinner and I was sat next to someone who just this incredibly fancy person and they were like, "Oh, what do you do?" And I was gonna mention the book, you know, and [00:47:00] of course, I mentioned the book and it was before it came out and he's like, "What's it about?" And I said, "Well, you know, my father who's now, you know, homeless and struggles with schizophrenia was secretly one of the most prolific sperm donors in history. It turned out I had all these siblings and..." but I just decided to like put it out there. Dr. McBride: Love it. Chrysta: And I was absolutely sure that this person next to me was gonna be like, "Oh, I gotta scoot further away from this person." He's like, "Oh, I had a really bad drug problem for a really long time." And then the guy across to me is like, "My mother's schizophrenic." And I'm just like, "Oh, this is [00:47:30] such a better conversation than whatever small talk we possibly would've..." You know, it's like, at any level of society, everyone's got...every family has its complexity. And I think that if we were all just more open, of course, I'm not promoting oversharing, like, you know, you don't need to tell your boss your life story. Dr. McBride: I could not agree with you more. First of all, that's much more interesting than talking about the weather or sports at a dinner table where you don't know everybody. And then [00:48:00] secondly, when you are a leader like you have been, it gives other people permission to be honest about their own stories. And who knows, maybe that helps them in a small way at being more authentic in their regular lives. Chrysta: Yeah. I think that's the power of vulnerability and getting over shame, is, yeah, maybe you can, in that tiny way, help other people to do that as well. Dr. McBride: Chrysta, I'm so grateful that you joined me today. You have an incredible way of writing and relating to not only your family [00:48:30] but to your reader. And I just can't thank you enough for writing this book and for spending time with me today. Chrysta: Thank you so much for having me, really. It's lovely. Dr. McBride: Thank you all for listening to "Beyond the Prescription." Please don't forget to subscribe, like, download, and share the show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you catch your podcasts. I'd be thrilled, if you like this episode, to rate and review it. And if you have a comment or [00:49:00] question, please drop us a line at info@lucymcbride.com. The views expressed on this show are entirely my own and do not constitute medical advice for individuals. That should be obtained from your personal physician. "Beyond the Prescription" is produced at Podville Media in Washington, D.C.  Get full access to Are You Okay? at lucymcbride.substack.com/subscribe

The Alan Cox Show

Chrysta Bilton is an American writer who lives in Los Angeles with her husband and two children. Her first book, the memoir Normal Family: On Truth, Love, and How I Met My 35 Siblings, was published in July 2022 by Little, Brown in the US and Octopus in the UK. Chrysta's work has appeared in The Guardian, Literary Hub, and Newsweek. Normal Family was listed among Kirkus's Best Nonfiction Books of 2022 and named a 'best' or 'must-read' book of Summer 2022 by Amazon, The Los Angeles Times,Vanity Fair, People, USA Today, The Hollywood Reporter, Cup of Jo, Parade, Today, Apple, and elsewhere. Book Recommendations: David Sheff, Beautiful Boy Robert Kolker, Hidden Valley Road Chris Holmes is Chair of Literatures in English and Associate Professor at Ithaca College. He writes criticism on contemporary global literatures. His book, Kazuo Ishiguro as World Literature, is under contract with Bloomsbury Publishing. He is the co-director of The New Voices Festival, a celebration of work in poetry, prose, and playwriting by up-and-coming young writers. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In the short but long weeks since Elon Musk took over Twitter, it seems like the platform, along with the social media class, has been put through the spin cycle. Between debates over who could be verified and how much that might cost, employee layoffs, and, of course, the lingering question of whether and when Donald Trump might be replatformed, there have been many questions about the fate of Twitter.    Vanity Fair's Nick Bilton, who literally wrote the book on Twitter, joins this week's episode of Inside the Hive, taking listeners inside his notebook to lay out the problems that Twitter faces as both a company and a barometer of the mindset of the country.    “Jack Dorsey and all the folks at Twitter used to say that Twitter is a reflection of society,” Bilton tells ITH listeners. “I think that it is a reflection of the extremes in society, and it brings out the best and, a lot more times, the worst in people because of the way it is designed.” What will happen to the platform given the political atmosphere, and can it help propel someone into the White House—or keep them out? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This week, Erin and Sara sit down with Chrysta Bilton, author of "Normal Family." They discuss Chrysta's emotional roller coaster of a story, how we can connect over our family traumas, the link between secrets and shame, and more.Executive Producers: Erin Foster, Sara Foster, and Allison BresnickAssociate Producer: Montana McBirneyAudio Engineer: Josh WindischThis episode is sponsored by: Hiya (hiyahealth.com/foster)Calm (calm.com/foster)Boll & Branch (bollandbranch.com PROMO CODE: foster15)Everlywell (everylywell.com/foster)Noom (noom.com/foster)Nutrafol

Chrysta Bilton, author of Normal Family; On Truth, Love, and How I Met My 35 Siblings, talks with Eve about her journey to writing her memoir. BOOK CLUB ZOOM PARTY WITH CHRYSTA OCTOBER 2ND 5PM 2022! for zoom invite, contact Eve! SHOW INFORMATION Who Even Am I Anymore; A Process Journal created by Eve Sturges (now available!) Instagram: @everythingsrelativepodcast Facebook: @everythingsrelativepodcast Twitter: @evesturges Email: eve@everythingsrelativepodcast.com Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/everythingsrelativepodcast Website: www.everythingsrelativepodcast.com

This week, Vanity Fair tech correspondent Nick Bilton speaks with cohost Joe Hagan about the recent leaks from Facebook that reveal the company knew of the toxic impact of their platforms, including Instagram, on users, especially teenage girls. In a world in which the social media giants—FAANG, or Facebook, Amazon, Apple, Netflix and Google—are too rich and powerful to be contained by limp political and regulatory systems, “we're left to the wolves,” says Bilton. After covering the social media world for a decade, Bilton says the only way to beat the media giants is to hack the system—ourselves—by reprogramming our behaviors, which are the literal coins of the social media realm. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Ronnie Karam, co-host of Watch What Crappens podcast helps Kate review Real Housewives: Ultimate Girls Trip 2. Chrysta Bilton, author of Normal Family: On Truth, Love, and How I Met My 35 Siblings. Reality Life with Kate CaseyPatreon: http://www.patreon.com/katecaseyCameo: https://cameo.com/katecaseyTwitter: https://twitter.com/katecaseyInstagram: http://www.instagram.com/katecaseycaTik Tok: http://www.tiktok.com/itskatecaseyClubhouse: @katecasey Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/113157919338245Amazon.com: www.amazon.com/shop/katecasey Make sure you're taking advantage of the opportunity to earn something back for all those Pampers you're going through. Download the Pampers Club app and start turning diapers into rewards. Earn $5 PampersCash with your first three product scans. Download Pampers Club app today and get access to exclusive Pampers coupons and more!”See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Chrysta Bilton's mother was a lesbian who asked a man she'd just met to be her sperm donor. It was only much later that Bilton learned the same man had donated sperm to countless other women. Bilton tells the story of connecting with her 35 siblings and her unusual childhood in her memoir Normal Family.Ken Tucker reviews Bartees Strange's new album, Farm to Table.Rafael Agustin's parents were physicians in Ecuador, but when they came to the U.S. they worked at a car wash and Kmart to get by. It wasn't until he was a teen that he learned they were undocumented. Agustin tells his story in his new memoir, Illegally Yours. He wrote for the TV series Jane the Virgin and is the CEO of the Latino Film Institute.

This week's episode of Inside the Hive first dives into the latest revelations from the January 6th committee, and explores what could happen next as the panel draws to a close Then Chrysta Bilton, along with her husband Nick Bilton, join Emily Jane Fox to discuss “Normal Family,” Chrysta's memoir that recounts her discovery of more than 35 biological siblings from the same sperm donor. She describes her colorful upbringing, the shock of a lifetime in finding out that she was perhaps unknowingly dating her half brother, and how this experience shaped her views on nature versus nurture Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Chrysta Bilton's mother was a lesbian who asked a man she'd just met to be her sperm donor. It was only much later that Bilton learned the same man had donated sperm to countless other women. Bilton tells the story of uncovering her 35 siblings and her unusual childhood in her memoir Normal Family. TV critic David Bianculli reviews the new HBO reality series The Rehearsal, where participants practice real-life scenarios.