Oh No! Lit Class

Megan and RJ are back (again)! And they swear it's really them and not a couple of criminal deviant androids. For real, they pinky-promise and everything. Join us for Philip K. Dick's Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep? and discover the shame of electric pet ownership, the power of robo-snatch, and fun existential pranks to play on your friends. Join the Discord for a Different Podcast: https://discord.gg/aCwvMjxNSf (https://discord.gg/aCwvMjxNSf) Get Some Merch: https://ohnolitclass.threadless.com/ (https://ohnolitclass.threadless.com/) Support us on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/OhNoLitClass (https://www.patreon.com/OhNoLitClass)

Um, hey, how's it going? Megan and RJ return from the void to bring you Sir Gawain and The Green Knight, a poem from Arthurian legend full of fun and games, including "Decapitation with Friends," "I'll Hunt and You Kiss," and "Please Have Sex with Me While My Husband is Gone." Megan gets accused of Horse Essentialism, RJ gets in touch with his inner Muppet, and Sir Gawain jizzes on a belt. Like, a lot. Join the Discord: https://discord.gg/aCwvMjxNSf (https://discord.gg/aCwvMjxNSf) Get Some Merch: https://ohnolitclass.threadless.com/ (https://ohnolitclass.threadless.com/) Support us on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/OhNoLitClass (https://www.patreon.com/OhNoLitClass) Support this podcast

It's one fish, two fish, red fish, racism fish as we dive into the dark underbelly of Dr. Seuss (no, seriously). Learn which of his whimsical rhymes Have Not Aged Well and about his takes on Japanese internment camps, which were just always bad. Also: Sneetch Taint, Ted Cruz Fails to Understand Books for Babies, and why every Dr. Seuss book is better if you scream it in the voice of the guy from There Will Be Blood. I BIGGER YOUR MILKSHAKE, LORAX! Support us on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/OhNoLitClass (https://www.patreon.com/OhNoLitClass) Get Some Merch: https://ohnolitclass.threadless.com/ (https://ohnolitclass.threadless.com/) Support this podcast

We're blaming Rent: The Musical for mispronouncing Maya Angelou's last name all these years because we can. And because it's just another reason to hate Rent. We're also reading her poetry. That too. Join us and discover Angelou's cable-car aspirations, learn how to dance like you've got diamonds in your pants, endure Bad Takes from old white dude poetry critics, and RJ Goes On A Questionable Tangent About Barack Obama. Support us on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/OhNoLitClass (https://www.patreon.com/OhNoLitClass) Get Some Merch: https://ohnolitclass.threadless.com/ (https://ohnolitclass.threadless.com/) Support this podcast

Happy 4th birthday to us! What did we get ourselves to celebrate? Ah, nothing much, just the epic tale of two pedantic idiots fighting over possession of The Last Brain Cell as they make their dramatic journey to Hell and back (which happens to involve a massive, hemisphere-shaking ween). ...We're talking about Dante and Virgil. Not Megan and RJ. In case that wasn't clear. We DID buy ourselves one of God's Unlimited Pasta Passes though. Support us on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/OhNoLitClass (https://www.patreon.com/OhNoLitClass) Get Some Merch: https://ohnolitclass.threadless.com/ (https://ohnolitclass.threadless.com/) Support this podcast

ON!LC is back and we're taking things in a new direction: straight to hell! Specifically, the Inferno, as we lay out the biography of Dante Alighieri and the historical context for The Divine Comedy in the first of our two-part special. RJ ruins Lord of The Rings Forever, Megan genders some genres, and we decide that 2021 is The Year We Get Cancelled By Italians. We'll see you in hell (in our self-insert fanfic). Support us on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/OhNoLitClass (https://www.patreon.com/OhNoLitClass) Get Some Merch: https://ohnolitclass.threadless.com/ (https://ohnolitclass.threadless.com/) Support this podcast

'Twas the night before Christmas, and all through the 'cast, Megan and RJ had lost it at last. Answering listener questions about not naming children, which authors to date, and which authors they'd choose to punch authors they hate. Questions about cats, libraries, and more became arguing about maritime law and weird porn. And if you're feeling the year-end blues, just remember that Zora Neale Hurston pegged Langston Hughes.

We'll just get this out of the way right here: No, we haven't watched season 2 of The Mandalorian. Yes, we know his name is Grogu. Now. After calling him Gorgu 500 times. Oops. Hey, it's all part of falling down the rabbit hole with Alice In Wonderland by Probable Pervert Lewis Caroll. Featuring: Unlocking the mystery of why all Alice in Wonderland adaptations are Like That™, learning upsetting penguin facts, and...actually that's pretty much it.

This Thanksgiving, be thankful your significant other doesn't expect you to pull a Virginia Woolf and write them a stealth love letter in the form of the celebrated and experimental genderbending novel, Orlando: A Biography, like Woolf did for her girlfriend. Instead of just, y'know, getting them a gift card to The Cheesecake Factory. Again. Christ, Todd, get it together.

Do you hear the people sing? Megan and RJ sure do as they get all kinds of Les Miserables on this special Patreon-request episode. Learn why no matter what time it is, it's always Time For Victor Hugo's Opinion, pro Les Mis speedrunner strats, the dark, horny truth behind the numbers 24601, and the Definitive Top Ranked Javert Drownings.

So...there's an acclaimed spooky Gothic novel called Rebecca by Daphne du Maurier and there's a new original movie on Netflix also called Rebecca and, in theory, this episode is about that, and NOT Paul Hollywood, evil housekeepers that sound like Wario, or James Bond devouring a mansion. In theory. Happy Halloween everybody!

Listener beware, you're in for a scare, Megan and RJ are here to give you Goosebumps! Learn all about RL Stine, the man behind the bumps, plus: Hairy Adoption Alternatives, "What's the Deal with Kids and Ventriloquism?", and the oral history of Goosebumps Live On Stage. Yup.

"Christine, I am The Angel of Music, and you must never touch my mask...seriously, have you ever taken a puck to the face unprotected? Brutal." It's Halloween, and you know what that means: Spooky ghosts, haunted opera houses, horny Frenchmen, and Emilio Estevez menacingly whispering things about ducks and/or hockey. It's Gaston Leroux's The Phantom of the Opera! I think!

In this episode, Megan and RJ ask: What killed John Keats, arguably the softest of the Softboi Romantic poets? Lord Byron and Percy Shelley blame mean reviews, but we're *pretty* sure it was the tuberculosis. Probably. See also: Poems About Things, discussions on whether or not peen-cursing equals female empowerment, the inherent sexiness of Grecian Urns, and Extremely Specific Burial Requests With RJ.

ARE YOU READY FOR SOME FOOTBALL??? By which we mean a book about football. Specifically, Friday Night Lights, journalist H.G. Bissinger's journey to Odessa, Texas, a town so obsessed with its high school football team it was willing to sacrifice grades, hopes, dreams, mental wellbeing, and yes, a testicle here or there. RJ scores a touchdown in the blogosphere, while Megan tries out some new catchphrases.

Life has thrown a lot at Megan and RJ lately, and so instead of a normal episode, they're going to explain lit theory, because that's easier somehow? Thrill as Megan threatens long-dead literary critics with bodily harm, shrug as RJ threatens to suck Bigfoot's ween before briefly becoming possessed by a competent theory professor, and tremble as we are all forced to experience Oh My F@cking God Philosophy Class, if only for a few minutes.

It's a real Throwback Thursday of an episode: Shakespeare! Vin Diesel reminding us of the importance of family! Rampant horniness! (Wait, that's just Shakespeare again) Off-key singing! Incorrect information regarding dairy products! Rambling tangents about 90s movies! So hop in your Death Zamboni and let's go, for there never was a story of more woe than RJ's new segment on Juliet and her Gnomeo.

Sure, he was born about 14 years after Hamilton died but our point still stands. This episode marks an ON!LC first as we cover a memoir: The Narrative Life of Frederick Douglass, An American Slave. Highlights include: Frederick Douglass Is Smarter Than Everyone, the inherent stupidity of displaying the flag of a war you lost, and where are The Good Historical Brad Pitts? RJ finds his financial forerunner and Megan might be just as bad as Epic Rap Battles Of History.

The Odyssey aka Part 2 of Homer's epic poetic duo features what is perhaps the worst and also most horny travelogue of the ancient world as Odysseus battles and bangs his way home while Athena, arguably, does all the real work. Meanwhile, Megan and RJ are both tempted by siren songs: 1980s anime and Brad Pitt. Donate to the Black Lives Matter Global Network: https://secure.actblue.com/donate/ms_blm_homepage_2019

Get it? Because Achilles has zero chill? Megan and RJ also find themselves lacking chill as they attempt to navigate the first of Homer's epic poem duology, The Iliad, starting with the important question: Just what does it mean to be 10-Year War Hot? RJ defends fictional historical sites, Megan gets lost in the mythological sauce, and instead of chasing waterfalls, we learn to stab the rivers and lakes that we're used to.

There's no getting around it, this episode on Kurt Vonnegut's seminal novel, Slaughterhouse-Five, is big. A big, meaty episode all about time, space, war, trauma, and also, for absolutely no reason at all, French philosopher Michel Foucault's weird bald head. Taking the trip to Tralfamadore with Megan and RJ is Rob Kristoffersen of the podcast Our Strange Skies, who doesn't really help so much as talk about finger-puppets, nu-metal, and winning the wang lotto. So it goes. Listen to Rob talk UFOs at https://www.ourstrangeskies.com/

What do Iowa tourism slogans, college mascots, Mel Gibson movie corrections, Miami Dolphins draft options, and institutionalized racism all have in common? Probably more than you think but mainly they're all things we end up somehow talking about in the course of our episode on Sandra Cisnero's contemporary YA classic, The House on Mango Street. Hey, at least we managed not to talk about Pitbull for once.

If we could turn back time, we'd probably make Cher less of a major cornerstone on this episode about Henry James's spooky novella The Turn of The Screw but it's too late for that now! RJ makes his spectacular return in an episode rife with song titles, interrupting trains, cat-chewing, ESPN-checking, and occasionally actually talking about the book. We're back, and we got you, babe.

We're sitting at the razor's edge of madness as Matt Johnston aka The Narcissist Cookbook joins Megan to share his feelings on HBO's adaptation of the His Dark Materials novel series, which are that it sucks so bad. Megan Rambles About Books They Read Years Ago, we appreciate The Princess Bride, Matt defends World War Z, and we learn that maybe we're all a little bit naked sometimes. In front of our neighbors, specifically.  Check out The Narcissist Cookbook's music, merch, and more at https://thenarcissistcookbook.bandcamp.com/Or annoy him personally at @NarcissistCook on twitter

March may be winding down but the madness continues with Paul Csomo, host of the amazing animal podcast Varmints! The exclamation point is part of the show's title but also indicative of the level of excitement you should have as Megan and Paul discuss book-huffers, defacers, skippers, and other such weirdsies. Also, we dunk on RJ a whole bunch. Sorry, bud.  Listen to Paul (and his co-host Donna) at https://varmints.podbean.com/or just Paul at https://anchor.fm/paul-csomo

Witcher? I hardly know her! March Mini Madness continues as Megan is given a lesson in Witcher Literature (Witcherature) by Joe Raspolich, co-host of Life, Death, and Taxonomy.  Together they'll play guessing games, critique Witcher world fashion, contemplate destiny, mispronounce even more character names than the last episode, and fall in love with foul-mouthed parrots and the sheer charisma of an ass you can toss a coin to your witcher off of.Listen to Joe (and his co-host Carlos) at  http://ldtaxonomy.com/

Our first entry into Miniaturized Madness in March is with Webby-nominated(!) Kate Wallinga, host of Ignorance Was Bliss and co-host of LifeWorld. Megan and Kate ostensibly discuss the pointless pedantry of book-shaming someone for not having read something but quickly veer off into Harry Potter character mispronouncing, author call-outs, and So You've Accidentally Written Something Problematic: A Guide. Also, we take away some birthdays, because we deserve them and JK Rowling doesn't. Hear Kate as a guest on a regular ON!LC at http://bit.ly/ONLCep62 Listen to Kate at https://iwbpodcast.com/ and   https://anchor.fm/lifeworld

RJ has officially left ON!LC HQ and Megan is totally handling it super well (he's fine, it's fine, we're fine). Until your favorite book idiots are reunited, please enjoy this retrospective of some of our greatest hits and relive the singing, screeching, shaming, and sex jokes that make our show the Internet's #1 Podcast for Literature and Penile Humours.

We're celebrating our 3rd birthday with Big Willy Shakespeare's Much Ado About Nothing, and everyone's* invited! Ready your "no" face to learn why vicious sarcasm is the truest love language, how to give off Big Thursday Energy, the benefits of faking your death, and the importance of taking your Geritol. *Mark Rylance is not invited.

While we may be more equipped to talk about Sesame Street, this episode we're covering If Beale Street Could Talk by James Baldwin. Join us on a journey through a lyrical, tragic, beautiful story as we learn about the 90s band Live, just what kicks are on Route 66, and the art of the stamp biography. RJ threatens a fetus and Megan says "this is really interesting" 10,000 times.

Megan and RJ are prancing and dancing their way into 2020 like a regular pair of Jellicle cats as they take on TS Eliot and his wildly disparate body of work, including poems of fragmented existential Modernist despair and also itty bitty kitty-cats. Also: Meeting our Simpsons and Star Wars quotes, daring to eat peaches, getting distracted by postmodernism and Kevin Bacon...again.

Megan and RJ attempt to atone for their episode 69-related sins with a dose of wholesome holiday cheer via ETA Hoffmann's classic Christmas tale, The Nutcracker! Wherein a potentially insane clockmaker refuses to help a small girl who's being extorted by a mouse with seven heads! Megan is confused by ballet, RJ does some exceptional word-mangling, and we make every possible "nut" joke in existence. From the midroll: ohnolitclass.threadless.com litographs.com @NarcissistCook

Ok, for real this time: E.L. James and her Twilight Businessman BDSM fan fiction are here and Megan and RJ are going to do everything in their power to make it possibly even worse than it already was. Featuring: Conspiracy theories, butt-whipping, bold creative writing choices, spicy meatballs, live nude Shakespearian drama, and more. Holy cow indeed.

It's here. Episode 69. Which means it's time to gird your loins and put on your DJs. That's right, your Dom Jeans. Welcome to 50 Shades of Grey, Happy Thanksgiving, and also we're very sorry.

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood, and we took the one that led to a dingdong joke, and that has made all the difference. It's time for some Robert Frost! RJ gets nihilistic about roads and salad, Megan thinks about death, and Robert Frost attempts to solve Communism with poetry. Also featured: boneless donuts, The Road Not Taken: The Remix, and why snow is an illegal immigrant.

In this episode, we learn that anything can happen on Halloween, including vampire lesbians as we read Joseph Sheridan Le Fanu's gothic, sapphic novella, Carmilla (or Mircalla, or Millarca...or Clam Rail). Along the way, we'll revisit the acronym RJ refuses to let go of, learn about moon magic, what in the hell a schloss is, and listen to Megan be an absolute Numbers Idiot. Happy Halloween!

Who's that Pokemon? It's Sherlock Holmes! It makes sense in context! We continue our Halloween celebration by dipping our toes into the deep, dark depths of the world of Sherlock Holmes and his sexy lamp, John Watson with The Hound of the Baskervilles! Hone those deduction skills with Victorian negging, Seinfeld impressioning, bog experiencing, and the scariest thing of all: college financial planning!

It's the Season of Spooks and Scares and we're starting with Shirley Jackson's The Haunting of Hill House, with the help of Moxie, host of Your Brain on Facts, who’s just FULL of facts...mostly about how best to see Liam Neeson's ween. Master the art of self-haunting, discover your Useless Psychic Gifts, and catch up on the hottest teen slang as we learn that sometimes the real ghosts are the kinks we shamed along the way. Listen to more Moxie at http://yourbrainonfacts.com/

Like a candy bar offered to you by a creepy British man, sink your teeth into this episode as we cover another writer still kickin’ it with the modern classic, Atonement, where we learn how a young girl's lies can ruin the lives of her loved ones but score her a sweet book deal. Also featured: Cat ASMR, being horny on main for Keira Knightley, and Emotions With RJ.

What, two episode drops in one day? And one of them is a pilot for a potential series where RJ actually TEACHES YOU THINGS? Wild. That's right, There's a new ON!LC in town, and this one's all about law, and therefore all RJ. This episode serves as an introduction to RJ's new solo miniseries, so enjoy learning about the constitution, the Supreme Court, and the horse it rode in on.

From the Patreon-only vault: Megan, RJ, and Jared aka Best Day, huddle in Jared's closet around his terrible Snowball mic to discuss Japanese video games based on Tom Sawyer, Dracula, and the works of H.P. Lovecraft. Learn about adorable vampires, significantly less adorable racism, the origins of Rihanna Belmont, and the sanity-restoring power of hotels.

Your favorite wildly unqualified hosts are back and have completely forgotten how to podcast! Join Megan and RJ as they once again venture onto the literary high seas with Treasure Island, where we learn that the real treasure is the dads you met along the way. Also featured: pirate accents, theoretical muppet sex, and about 10 seconds of literary theory that dissolves into memes. WE'RE BACK BABY!

Screw books! We're a True Crime podcast now! Megan and RJ are joined by Kate, host of the podcast Ignorance Was Bliss to get all up in Truman Capote's genre-birthing "nonfiction" book, In Cold Blood. Together we'll objectify nuns, workshop Kansas tourism slogans, play "Capote or Pitbull?", and learn why murderers are often really, really dumb. Just like, so unbelievably stupid, you guys. Listen to Kate's show at https://iwbpodcast.com/

Another special request episode takes back down that old YA road to Paul Zindel's novel, Pardon Me, You're Stepping On My Eyeball. Soak in that good good 1970s teenage disillusionment while RJ forgets who wrote Catcher in the Rye, gives the graduation speech no one asked for, and just generally drives Megan to the brink of madness.

We're back for more Big Willy, this time taking a look at Othello, the classic tale of tragedy, betrayal, and people flat-out refusing to JUST TALK TO EACH OTHER OH MY GOD. We discover that Iago is not a parrot, but do the parrot voice anyway, learn the dangers of being on #IslandTime, have a real hard time saying "Brabantio" and make that one stupid Spaceship Earth joke AGAIN, because we're basic.

You'll laugh, you'll cry, you'll wonder why we keep talking about Star Wars as we recount Kazuo Ishiguro's acclaimed classic, The Remains of The Day, the most frustratingly captivating novel about a butler who does not have sex. We revisit being Too British For Feelings, give up on our jazz dreams, and remember that we're all complicit in war crimes. And also nude John Cleese. We're all complicit in that too.

Take a trip down memory lane to Little Golden Book Land as we take advantage of a mysterious delivery to revisit such greats as The Poky Little Puppy and Tootle! Learn about LGB's humble beginnings, how Scuffy the Tugboat can defeat Thanos, and why the illustrations are not as cute as you remember. We fancast a hip new Little Golden Movie, try not to sexualize trains, and achieve our dreams at zombo.com

Oh Lord do we ever feel it coming as we dive back into the weird, wonderful, nearly constantly horny world of poetry with E.E. Cummings (and learn why we definitely wrote his name properly here). RJ remembers the 90s, Megan defends Avante Garde art against good sense, and we all learn that real love is less about marriage and more about being true to your farts.

We step through CS Lewis's titular wardrobe into Narnia with Matt Johnston aka The Narcissist Cookbook to take a story of magical lands and good vs evil that's been dear to him since childhood and just ruin it. Just really leave it in shambles. Highlights include the logistics of lion circumcision, candy worth betraying your family for, founding the Susan Pevensie Appreciation Club, and the Secret Origins of RJ.Listen to Matt as The Narcissist Cookbook onBandcamp: http://bit.ly/2FIRfFoFacebook: http://bit.ly/2TOoP1JYoutube video for the featured song, "Courtney:" http://bit.ly/2FOJQ8KComposition board game Kickstarter: https://bit.ly/2Fz2PnB

We're joined by author, comic writer, and Dickens-hating enthusiast BJ Mendelson as we read A Tale of Two Cities and learn that, while the revolution may not be televised, it WILL be knit into a sweater. Discover just how Batman and the WWE figure into the literary canon while BJ attacks Dickens for being an asshole, RJ attacks Napolean for being short, and Megan attacks the French language by attempting to speak it at all. Follow BJ on twitter @BJMendelson or on his site at https://bjmendelson.com/ Give us your money plz at https://www.patreon.com/OhNoLitClass

The authors are only mostly dead in this special request episode that takes us to the sci-fi space futures of "Bloodchild" by Octavia Butler and "Sandkings" by George RR Martin. Learn the do's and don'ts of exotic (occasionally human) pet ownership as Megan gets a phobia of bugs and novel-related nomenclature while RJ talks like the animals and enlists in the #StugotzArmySupport us on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/OhNoLitClassStart your podcast on Simplecast: http://refer.smplc.st/OhNoLitClass