The Vegas Therapist - Ryan Wynder

Here you go! This is the latest installment of my marathon running adventures! What I learned from running my 4th Marathon in a calendar year. This one was my most successful marathon all time and I learned a lot about myself during this race and over all 4 races.Make sure to check out my website www.ryanwynder.com for more infoHit me up if you are interested in me speaking at an event that you have coming up. Follow me on Instagram @thevegastherapist

In this episode I reflect on my recent turn in decades! Living the life of a 50 year old! I present some interesting facts about being 50 and what that may look like for how you want to live the rest of your life! In a timely manner I had a listener reach out who was contemplating her own life and purpose. The following questions were asked: What happens when we realize we have not been living the life we want? How do we get the courage to change and adapt this late in life? How do we embrace the things and people we actually want in our lives and let go of those that no longer serve us.So great questions with some even better answers!For more you can vistit my website at www.ryanwynder.comFollow me on Instagram @thevegastherapist

In this episode I look at concepts that were discussed in Jonathan Haidt's recent book The Anxious Generation. There is much to digest in this book and I am only looking at one part that I feel plays a major role in the development of our kids and the keys to their well-being, mental health, and overall competence. Our kids need to face challenges, obstacles, and have the opportunity for risky play. The lack of these things in their life is creating what Haidt sees as the anxious generation. In addition to exploring the impacts of these things on our kids, I also discuss the impacts on adults. Adults need to continue to grow and push themselves to experience new things or risk facing the same anxiety crippling issues. For more you can visit my website www.ryanwynder.com You can also find my 14 Day Relationship challenge on my site.

In this episode I breakdown the life lessons I learned from running my 4th Marathon, second this year! Overall I go through 4 things I learned that are life lessons for everyone, not just runners. One of the main lessons gained from this race was the importance of purpose. Victor Frankl said, "Life is never made unbearable by circumstances, but only by lack of meaning and purpose." Such an important concept for life and for running. Do you have purpose in your goals and in your life? Listen in for the other things gained from this time through the 26.2! For more visit my website www.ryanwynder.com or follow me on Instagram @thevegastherapist

In this episode I tackle the dark side of meaning making. As humans we instinctively assign meaning to events or experiences we go through. Some of the info I draw from comes from Dr. Benjamin Hardy's book Personality Isn't Permanent. In the book he says "we can generate a premature cognitive commitment about ourselves" this cognitive commitment can be based on mistaken or misinformed meaning of things. Meaning that begins or helps to shape our self-image and how we see the world. Creating meaning is fundamental to who we are and who we become. As Brene Brown says, "we are meaning makers!" I also reference the Same Love by Macklemore & Ryan. How trauma leads to attaching meaning about ourselves is discussed as well. For more about me visit my website www.ryanwynder.com. You can also follow me on Instagram @thevegastherapist and also visit my website for the link to my 14 Day Marriage Challenge.

In this episode I give you the break down of what I learned from running my third marathon. This was to Utah Valley Marathon that started in Provo Canyon. The Race was a challenge to say the least! I wanted to share a few the things I learned and the takeaways for life. Things around preparation, expectations, embracing obstacles, setting goals and accountability, people, and one final lesson you will have to listen for! Be sure to check out my website www.ryanwynder.com for more information about me. Also the link to my 14 Day Marriage Challenge is there.

The most powerful human need is to be seen and heard. We want to be know that matter. In this episode I explore the impact of not being seen or heard in our lives. The lack of having that type of acknowledgment in our life comes with a variety of consequences, including losing trust in our inclinations and our intuitive needs. I discuss a variety a ways that we try and compensate for this in our lives. Finally, I talk about the ways we can heal this wound in our lives For more info on me visit my website www.ryanwynder.com or follow me on Instagram @thevegastherapist

This episode is a result of the thought I had while watching the documentary called Dynasty. It's about the New England Patriots and in particular the focus on Bill Belichick and Tom Brady and how he came to be the Patriots quarterback. As Fate would have hit a huge hit on the starter at the time, Drew Bledsoe opened the door for Brady to get his opportunity! An opportunity he did not let go of and turned into 7 Super Bowls! It got me thinking about fate and the role it plays in our life. I share some experiences of how fate brought me to the place I am in my career. My challenge is for you to look at how fate has shown up in your life. More about me can be found on my website www.ryanwynder.com or follow me on Instagram @thevegastherapist

In this episode I tackle the topic of relationships. It's Valentines Day so I assume everyone is thinking about their relationships and how they want them to improve! With 20 years of experience in the field and seeing thousands of couples I thought to myself, I should know what are essential components to a successful relationship. Sit back, take notes and enjoy my relationship essentials and see where you can be better with your partner. From Trust to Connection I have you covered and as a special bonus I leave you with the 777 challenge. For more on me go to my website www.ryanwynder.com or follow me on Instagram @thevegastherapist

In this episode I break down the concept of mental load. It refers to the invisible burden that is associated with the effort involved in managing your work, relationships, family and household. This is typically associated with woman in a relationship. There are 4 parts to the mental load: anticipate, identify, decide, and monitor. Education and awareness are key to helping to alleviate the burden of the mental load that exists in the relationship. I also share details about my own experiment of helping to alleviate the mental load in my own relationship. For more about me go to my website www.ryanwynder.com and following me on Instagram @thevegastherapist

Being traumatized means continuing to organize your life as if the trauma were still going on. In this episode I discuss how we organize our lives based on our traumatic experiences. They hey is being able to identify what the patterns are and how they are connected to our previous trauma. The metaphor of sitting your poopy diaper will be explained in the episode. For more go to my website www.ryanwynder.com or follow me on Instagram @thevegastherapist

In this episode I update everyone on what I have been up to and what things have been going on in my life since the last episode. My focus is on the value of time. As we approach this new year how do we want to utilize our time for effectively. Time is the stuff life is made of and our use of it determines many things things in our life. I leave you with 3 questions - 1. What do you want to do with this one wild and precious life. 2. How do you want to show up as a friend, partner, worker, etc. 3. What is important to you and what may be missing in your life? For more about me visit my webpage www.ryanwynder.com or following me on Instagram @thevegastherapist

In this episode Ryan dives into part 2 of 2. This episode will focus more on the Defense Mechanisms we use to keep us "safe" or to keep us feeling more hurt or pain in our lives. "Most of us do not reenact the experience of the trauma itself. Instead we act out the coping strategy (or defense mechanism) we evolved to deal with the trauma. Ryan will discuss a number of different defense mechanisms we utilize, including Terrance Real's adaptive child defense, self-abandonment, disconnection, self blame and shame, victim mentality, and the inability to receive. From this episode you will gain a better understanding of your own defense mechanisms and find out ways you can begin to move away from them and start healing. To follow Ryan on Instagram go to @thevegastherapist or visit his website www.ryanwynder.com Don't forget about his 14 Day Relationship Challenge, the link is available on his website!

In this episode Ryan breaks down the first of a two part episode. The focus for the first episode will be on Triggers. The word trigger itself has become a hot topic and according to MaryCatherine McDonald and her new book Unbroken, it has become a catchall for any occasion in which we have an emotion that is remotely unpleasant or unwanted. This misconception also leads to a misunderstanding of how we deal with triggers when they happen. We have learned to block and avoid instead of adapting and healing! There are three things to be mindful of when it comes to triggers: 1. We are always conscious of our triggers, 2. Triggers are something to be avoided at all costs, 3. Not feeling anything is a realistic goal. Ultimately when it comes to triggers they are a sign that there things that we have not yet processed. Because of that we need to pay attention to them, acknowledge them, and honor ourselves by doing the work to reduce the impact they have on us. You can follow Ryan on Instagram @thevegastherapist or go to his website www.ryanwynder.com Check out my 14 Day Relationship Challenge - link on website

Just in time for Father's Day! In this episode I sit down with David Frey, who is currently a marriage researcher and coach for men who want to be better husbands in their relationships. David himself has been married for 33 years to Ingrid Frey. They met as missionaries in Bolivia and started dating in college. They adopted two children at birth. Their names are Sterling, who is 26 and Alina, who is 21. David has worked as an executive in the business world and as a solo entrepreneur for over 23 years. David has had a genetic disease that has no cure and so he decided to set aside his business career to help men become better husbands. He's the author of the book titled, “301 Ways to Become a High Value Husband.” Currently he is working on a new book titled - The #1 Rule for High Value Husbands. Our episode will focus on his most recent book and the number 1 rule, which is Taking Ownership - David will define what that looks like in our lives, as well as discuss what happens when men do not take ownership in their relationships. Finally, we discuss the 9 Aspects of creating an Ownership Lifestyle that will produce a more fulfilling and connected relationship with our partner and those around us. To connect with David you can find him on Facebook or Instagram @davidfrey.highvaluehusbands You can find me on my website www.ryanwynder.com or follow me on Instagram @thevegastherapist Check out my 14 Day Relationship Challenge as well, the link for that is on my website.

In this episode, I welcome in Kathy Moffat, who currently is a Relationship Coach. For this show though, she is hear to share her story about raising a child that has severe Mental Health issues. Kathy and I have been intertwined for 16 years now as we have worked together in helping her son. This was a very real and vulnerable conversation about the challenges that come with having a child that experiences these things. Kathy digs into some of the more difficult topics such as fear, disappointment, and dealing with the potential of suicide with your child. She shares her process of moving from "fixing them" to an acceptance of this being a life long journey. Kathy gives some great insight and advice for parents who may be dealing with similar issues, things she wish she had known, what she has learned from her experiences, and the importance of self-care. A critical part of the conversation was how Kathy dealt with the shame of having a child with mental health issues. Shame has kept most of us from being open about the challenges around mental health. Kathy shares some great advice about managing the shame. This is mental health awareness month and I feel this episode is great for spreading the message about dealing with mental health. We still have room for growth and awareness in the area of mental health. You can follow Kathy on Instagram @kathymoffat.co Follow me on Instagram @thevegastherapist or visit my website www.ryanwynder.com

I am honored to celebrate my 100th episode with my special guest MaryCatherine McDonald, PhD. She is the author of the book Unbroken: The Trauma Response is Never Wrong. MC (as she goes by), is a research professor and life coach who has been researching, lecturing, and publishing on the neuroscience, psychology, and lived experience of trauma since beginning her PhD in 2009. For more, visit alchemycoaching.life or follow her on Instagram @mc.phd This episode is like a Trauma 101 of sorts. Through her research MC has come to define trauma as a unbearable emotional experience that lack a relational home. Trauma also has three core parts 1. A narrative event 2. Emotional content 3. A set tags or labels Each part is discussed and we talk about how each part impacts our outlook and how each of these parts can be integrated for healing. We discuss some key components to trauma which include reconstructing the world view that can be shattered as a result of experiencing trauma. Taking our power back from the labels that have been given to us through others or our trauma is critical to healing as well. The role of shame in our trauma and how we manage triggers among other important aspects of trauma are discussed as well. Such a great conversation on trauma with an amazing guest! You can follow me on Instagram @thevegastherapist or visit my website www.ryanwynder.com You can also check out my 14 Day Relationship Challenge at https://14daybettermarriagechallenge.com/home

In this episode I discuss the process of taking power back in our lives. There are a number of things in life that can take our power from us: trauma, people, and especially negative labels. When these things have taken us down and put us in a cage or we find ourselves feeling powerless or helpless to them, its time to take a stand and take our power back. In order to take back the reins we may need to understand what we are fighting in the first place, or that the way we have been fighting is not working or backfiring on us. Each time we come face to face with the things that have power over us we have the opportunity to stand up for ourselves, not doing so can leave us feeling like we have betrayed ourselves. which only adds more layers of shame and labels to the existing pile. After discussing this process I share a number of ways we can begin to take our power back and reclaim our lives and create and identity for ourselves that we want! You can follow me on Instagram @thevegastherapist or visit my website www.ryanwynder.com

In this episode I sit down with my fellow colleague Lauren Schloss. Lauren is a Licensed Drug and Alcohol Counselor and CPC Intern. She has been practicing as a therapist for 10+ years. As a therapist Lauren has great perspective and specializes in working with individuals who struggle with addiction, trauma, low self-esteem, and depression. Over the course of the last year, Lauren lost both of her parents, and as an only child the caregiver role fell solely on her. All of this while having a family of her own and trying to work as well. During the episode Lauren offers great insight into working through these difficult live events. We discuss the role of trauma and how it impacted her and how she is committed to finding herself after these difficult losses. You can find me on Instagram @thevegastherapist or visit my website www.ryanwynder.com. My 14 Day Relationship challenge is available to purchase on my website.

In this episode, I discuss the details of a new book I have been reading by Terrance Real, called "US." It was a great follow up to my previous episode with my wife Sonia as we shared secrets to our successful 25 year marriage. In Real's Book he identifies a rhythm in relationship - Harmony, Disharmony, and Repair. This rhythm is cyclical and we move through it multiple times within the term of our relationships. An important realization for many in relationships is that their will be disharmony and that does not equal a bad relationship it simply just is what it is. We all have it in our relationships, but the key is how we repair the disharmony. There can be a number of benefits we gain from repair in building a stronger relationship. You can follow me on Instagram @thevegastherapist or go to my website for more info about me or to sign up for my 14 Day Marriage Challenge - www.ryanwynder.com

In this episode, I welcome a special guest to the show! My wife Sonia joins me, as we recently celebrated our "Silver" anniversary. I wanted share with you what has worked for us in our relationship and the things that we feel can lead to a successful marriage. In the episode, we share our story of how we met and then delve into some of the keys to marriage. Topics include: Love & commitment, time together, chemistry & compatibility, growth, interests, communication and of course SEX! I hope you enjoy what we have to share. Follow me on Instagram @thevegastherapist or my website www.ryanwynder.com

In this episode I sit down with Dr. Randall Bell, who recently came out with the book Post-Traumatic Thriving. Dr. Bell has specialized in disaster recovery and has been involved in such events as the World Trade Center, Flight 93, Sandy Hook, Hurricane Katrina, OJ Simpson and Heavens gate to name a few. In his book he lays out the academic research about trauma as well as discusses his own PTSD as a child. In the episode we dive into the 3 phases of Trauma outlined in his book: The Dive Stage, Survive Stage, and finally the Thrive Stage. Each stage has its core components and importance for moving through and healing. The ultimate end goal for everyone is to find a way to utilize the energy from their trauma to thrive fully in life. To set goals and achieve success. Not letting the trauma define us but using it's impact as a way to build resilience along the way to healing and thriving. To follow me on Instagram check out @thevegastherapist or visit my website www.thevegastherapist.com you can also reach out to me via email - ryanwynder@gmail.com

Dr. Anna Lembke received her undergraduate degree in Humanities from Yale University and her medical degree from Stanford University. She is currently Professor and Medical Director of Addiction Medicine, Stanford University School of Medicine. She is also Program Director of the Stanford Addiction Medicine Fellowship, and Chief of the Stanford Addiction Medicine Dual Diagnosis Clinic. She is a diplomate of the American Board of Psychiatry and Neurology, and a diplomate of the American Board of Addiction Medicine. Dr. Lembke was one of the first in the medical community to sound the alarm regarding opioid overprescribing and the opioid epidemic. In 2016, she published her best-selling book on the prescription drug epidemic, "Drug Dealer, MD – How Doctors Were Duped, Patients Got Hooked, and Why It's So Hard to Stop" (Johns Hopkins University Press, 2016). Her book was highlighted in the New York Times as one of the top five books to read to understand the opioid epidemic (Zuger, 2018). Her latest book, "Dopamine Nation: Finding Balance in the Age of Indulgence" (Dutton/Penguin Random House, August 2021), was an instant New York Times and Los Angeles Times bestseller, and explores how to moderate compulsive overconsumption in a dopamine-overloaded world. In this episode we talk about the elements surrounding our "Dopamine Nation" This includes the Pleasure- Pain Balance, The Broken Balance, our society that is running from pain, the solution of pressing on the pain side of things, and finally the concept of Radical Honesty. It is a packed filled episode with something for us all. Dr. Lembke has a great understanding of all of these elements and shares them in a very real way. You can follow me on Instagram @thevegastherapist or visit my website www.thevegastherapist.com Check out my 14 Day Better Relationship Challenge by going to my website and clicking on the link.

In this episode I welcome in my guest September Frogley, she is the founder of Connection is the Cure. The goals of this foundation include: 1. Normalize and encourage ongoing conversations about mental health and suicide prevention, 2. Equip people with prevention strategies, 3. Connect people to resources in the community and each other! September shares her personal story with losing her brother to suicide and how that experience sent her down this path to create this foundation to raise awareness for others. Healing the shame for those suffering and those impacted is hugely tied to our ability to connect and to share. In addition to her story we tackle some of the myths around suicide, ways to help those struggling, and much more. You can learn more about this foundation by following on Instagram @connection_isthe_cure or the website https://www.connectionisthecureidaho.org/  The event is January 17th, doors open at 5pm @ The Ford Idaho Center - Smith Alley, Max Hall , and Brock Bevell will be speaking, Ben Fuller with be performing. For more info on myself follow me on Instagram @thevegastherapist or visit my website www.ryanwynder.com You can also access my 14 Day Better Marriage Challenge by going to my website

In this episode I tackle the topic of goal setting! There are a few key parts for a new way to set goals that I address in the episode. First, there are two types of motivation, "Want-to" and "Have-to" Motivation, the type you have will influence your overall success with achieving your goals! The main part of the episode is dedicated to having goals that are centered in our values. Goals that are value based have lasting power and generates enduring motivation. A value is not something to be achieved, but is something you can only manifest by acting in accordance with it. Being "aligned" in the way we live and want to live helps to reduce pain in life. I draw from 2 articles by Mark Travers and Steven Hayes in Feb. 2023 Psychology Today as well as Steven Hayes book "A Liberated Mind" 1. Rate your Domains - Scale 1-10 (Family, Marriage/couples/intimate relations, Parenting, Friends/social life, Work, Education, Recreation/Fun, Spirituality, Physical self-care, & Art/creative expression 2. Rate your consistency in the areas above - how consistent have your actions been with your values 3.What do I care about in this area? What do I want to do in this area that reflects that caring? What can I do to manifest this value more in my life? Follow me on Instagram @thevegastherapist or visit my website www.ryanwynder.com Check out my website as well for a link to my 14 Day Better Marriage Challenge!

In this episode I approach the topic of Emotional Maturity. I really have connected with this concept because I think we can all use work in this area. Each of us have areas we can improve on when it comes to our emotional maturity. An emotional immature person will find it hard to communicate or process their emotions and can appear selfish or aloof, it also is the lack of ability to regulate our emotions or to sit in emotional discomfort. Emotional immaturity comes from how our developmental needs were not met as children and the modeling we saw from our parental figures. I focus on 4 ways to become more Emotionally Mature: 1. Self - Aware, 2. Take responsibility for your feelings, 3. Work on Empathy, 4. Nurturing Inner Child. This episode has something for everyone. You can follow me on Instagram @thevegastherapist or go to my website www.ryanwynder.com You can find my 14 Day Better Marriage Challenge on the website.

In this episode I continue the to discuss working with The Shadow. In particular I focus on the most common manifestation of the Shadow, the inferior shadow. I reference the book The Tools, by Stutz and Michels. Discussion includes why its so important to understand your shadow, how we become dependent on outside sources for approval and validation, and the hiding place for our garbage becomes our inner self. Ultimately we turn something beautiful (inner self) into something we despise (the shadow). The Force of Self Expression is the tool I outline, which drives us to reveal ourselves in a truthful, and genuine way without caring how other people will react. When we are connected to this force a part of you speaks that usually is silent. In Addition to discussing the shadow, I turn to the topic of shame and working on identifying and stopping the shame cycle. I believe that working on our shame opens us up to really work on and with our Shadow. The two go hand in hand for much greater results! You can follow me on Instagram @thevegastherapist or visit my website www.ryanwynder.com to contact me or find my 14 Day Relationship Challenge!

In this episode I tackle the topic of the Shadow Self. This concept was introduced early in Psychotherapy history by Carl Jung. The Shadow Self is the part of us we want to hide from the world. For some it is our dark side, others it may be a hurt or trauma they have experienced, it can also be a feeling of unworthiness or less than, or evan a behavior. According to Jung, "there could be no light without shadow, no psychic wholeness without imperfection." The Shadow is everything which one has no wish to be, therefor we must confront it! The acceptance and integration of our shadow is very healing work.  The topic for this episode came from the new movie on Netflix, with Jonah Hill and his therapist Stutz. In the movie they discuss the shadow self of Jonah Hill and record an exercise with him doing Shadow work. In the episode, I get vulnerable and reveal what came out for me when I replicated the exercise with myself.  Steps for the exercise: 1. Identify a part of yourself or a time when you felt inferior, hurt, ashamed, inadequate, etc.  2. Think of the former version of you and invite it to have a conversation. 3. Begin a dialogue with it - try to understand the Shadow and what it needs from you. Validate the shadow 5. Integrate it: go back through that event and see yourself going through it in the way you would like... Journal your thoughts. You can follow me on Instagram @thevegastherapist or visit my website www.ryanwynder.com  My 14 Day Marriage Challenge is available at www.14daybettermarriagechallenge.com/home

In this episode I explore the concept of self-gaslighting. I found this to be a very interesting concept and wanted to do a show specifically about it. One reason I did this show was that I feel we all can relate in someway to having done this to ourselves. In the episode I break down 5 ways we may be self gaslighting. I also help identify people who may struggle more with the specific types. In addition to what self gaslighting can look like, I also provide things we can do to prevent it. Finally, I provide some affirmations to help solidify how we feel. You can follow me on Instagram @thevegastherapist. Visit my website at www.ryanwynder.com. Finally for my 14 Day Marriage challenge go to http://www.14daybettermarriagechallenge.com/home

In this episode I tackle the topic of comfort zones. Much of the episode is based on the book by Jordan Tarver, You Deserve This Shit. Our comfort zone can be both safe and toxic at the same time. Our evaluation of where we sit in that is needed constantly. Complacency is the obvious way we get stuck in our comfort zone, but even complacency has numerous forms we need to be aware of. Breaking free involves building trust in ourselves, giving ourselves permission to be a beginner, and changing our lens about failure. Remember everything in life begins to flourish outside our comfort zone, that is where the magic happens! Follow me on Instagram @thevegastherapist or go to my website www.ryanwynder.com

In this episode my guest Anita Monodu shares with us her 5 step process for helping clients live a shame free life! Those steps include sharing your story, manifesting who you want to be in life without shame and embodying and living a shameless life. A key component to letting go of shame through sharing our story first and foremost with ourselves. Many people stay in denial of their story because they fear the shame that comes with that. Anita also share her “Be, Do, Have” model which a huge mindset shift for all of us if we want to take action and live the life we desire. Anita is a fellow therapist and you can find her on her website www.udomom.com or follow her on Instagram @udomomhw. Anita Momodu is an International Women's Reproduction Coach. She travels the world gathering communities, demolishing shame, and uplifting experiences. During the day Anita is a Clinical Professional Counselor Intern, she helps birthing individuals and their families take back their power from shame in their journey to and through parenthood. She is also a 3x Author, military spouse, mother of 4, full-spectrum doula (birth, postpartum, bereavement), childbirth educator, doula educator, and international non-profit President. You can follow me on Instagram @thevegastherapist or my website, www.ryanwynder.com

In this episode I welcome Tony Overbay to the show. Tony is a fellow therapist and podcaster, he host the Virtual Couch and Waking up to Narcissism podcasts. In addition he offers his Magnetic Marriage course to couples. We discuss pitfalls couples fall into and Tony talks about his 4 pillars of communication. While discussing his pillars we also break down how self protection and a lack of vulnerability get in the way of our utilization of these pillars. At times we follow the “script” and other times we are just engaged in freestyle as we discuss valuable components for a better relationship! Find Tony at www.tonyoverbay.com to learn more about his marriage course. You can follow me at www.ryanwynder.com also check out my 14 Day Relationship Challenge at www.14daybettermarriagechallenge.com/home or on Instagram @thevegastherapist

This episode is taken from a presentation I gave to a group of couples at church. I was invited to speak on strengthening our marriages/relationships. I talk about 5 things we can do to improve our relationships. Topics include: Intimacy, Goals, Caring, Expressing Love, and Expectations. I hope you enjoy! Follow me on Instagram @thevegastherapist or www.ryanwynder.com

In honor of Mental Health Awareness Month. In this episode I will discuss 5 things we can do to improve or maintain our mental health. Treat yourself with kindness, surround yourself with good people, learn how to deal with stress, set realistic goals, and get help when you need it. These will all be discussed, including the need to embrace our humanness with grace and kindness. Follow me on Instagram @thevegastherapist or my website www.ryanwynder.com

This is a tutorial video to help youth develop a more positive mindset in connection with sport performance. Things like dealing with failure and disappointment, positive mindset tools, understanding expectations and identity, and the development of your why will all be discussed. The principals and ideas shared can be utilized in a number of different ways. Sports, school, and life all require a positive mindset as well our ability to work through failure. If you or your teen is struggling there are some helpful tools presented in this podcast. To learn more about me you can follow me on Instagram @thevegastherapist or visit my website www.ryanwynder.com

In this episode I discuss what trauma responses can look like, some of which may surprise you! In an article written by Dr. Melissa DeBose Hankins she talks about the correlation between Will Smiths reactive response at the Academy Awards and his personal trauma, making the connection that what we saw ultimately was a trauma response. She makes a compelling argument in sharing some of Will's childhood trauma and how it was connected to what happened that night. In addition I discuss trauma responses that I see in my practice and the importance of getting help for the trauma we have, whether it be Big T stuff or little T. If it is impacting our life or dictating our responses to things we need to seek help for the trauma in our lives. You can follow me on Instagram @thevegastherapist or visit my website www.ryanwynder.com

In this episode I look at the benefits of seeing our survivor/story. There is a story in all of us and we need to honor that. Each of us had to overcome obstacles in our life, those challenges have given us strength and skill. Maintaining a victim mindset with our story keeps us stuck in our problems. Positive change is more likely to occur when we are able to do 3 things I discuss in the episode. Not allowing negative occurrences in our life to define us is key to our writing our hero story. Follow me on Instagram @thevegastherapist or go to my website www.ryanwynder.com

In this episode I “geek out” a bit over the topic of shame! Shame is a battle for each of us in some way! We all have our triggers for it and it tends to come from old core negative beliefs we have about ourselves. My hope for this episode is that we can all be better at managing our shame, rather than it control us. I discuss what our shame leveraging us looks like and 5 downsides to shame being in charge! I also share how we can improve our shame awareness and resilience as Brene Brown talks about. I also share 6 benefits we can have when we are able to leverage our shame. I hope you enjoy! Follow me on Instagram @thevegastherapist or my website www.ryanwynder.com

In this episode I share with you my presentation I gave at the Hope and Healing Workshop. The workshop was dedicated to mental health and addiction recovery. It was a great event with many wonderful presenters. The first part of the presentation contains some overlap from the last episode, the difference being I share more case examples. Then I talk about how Radical Honesty helps to break down shame! That part of the presentation is all new and very powerful. This was an amazing event! Follow me @thevegastherapist on Instagram or my website www.ryanwynder.com

In this episode I tackle the topic of Radical Honesty. It is the practice of telling the truth about things both large and small, especially when doing so exposes our flaws and entails consequences. The first part of the episode is spent discussing the consequences of lying and what it does to our psyche and self esteem. Then I talk about the 3 Benefits of Radical Honesty. 1. Promotes Awareness of our Actions 2. Fosters intimate connections 3.Leads to a truthful autobiography. The episode finishes with a personal challenge that you don't want to miss! Follow me on Instagram @thevegastherapist join my Facebook Group page or go to my website www.ryanwynder.com

In this episode I share an interview I did for another podcast called Nunn Talks. There was so many great things we talked about I wanted makes sure as many people as possible heard the content. Topics include how anxiety can create apathy, and why apathy can be a dangerous state for teens. We also talk about building resilience and personal competence. What parents can do to help their kids in these areas. Finally we discuss working through self doubt, and I provide 4 things teens can do to work through self doubt. You can follow me on Instagram @thevegastherapist or go to website www.ryanwynder.com

In this episode I discuss a topic that is applicable to us all! Life Transitions, some are natural and some are thrust upon us. Either way we have to deal with them as they come. I personally have had several transitions this year: Moving, loss of a parent, 2 kids left home, and work transition. I discuss several ways we can improve our ability to have Life Transitions be a positive thing for us. Enjoy! Follow me on Instagram @thevegastherapist or my website www.thevegastherapist.com.

In this episode I pay tribute to one of my favorite shows, Ted Lasso. I do so by breaking down a important episode on mental health. Season 2 focuses a great deal on mental health and the idea we all have stuff and the importance of working through our pain so that it does not control us! I focus on three things from the episode; Our stuff and the importance of working through it, Secrets, in particular secrets that carry toxic shame, and choices. All of these things play a vital role in our mental health and well-being and are worth an evaluation within ourselves. Enjoy! Follow me on Instagram @thevegastherapist or go to my website www.ryanwynder.com

In this episode I sit down with Mequell Buck, she is an author, speaker, suicide survivor, and hosts a Podcast with her husband Adam. The podcast is called Thriving with Mental Illness. Mequell shares her story of dealing her mental illness (bipolar II diagnosis). We talk about the process for her to get healthy, what was helpful and not helpful for her. She opens up about her suicide attempt and what that meant to her. Mequell shares how her life is better because of this (mental illness) and how it forced her to trim the unimportant things out of her life. She discusses the importance of redefining our view of successes in life and mental health. She gives some great advice to those struggling with mental illness as well as their spouses. Don't miss this one! Follow Miquell on Instagram @thrivingwithmentalillness. You can follow me on Instagram as well @thevegastherapist or visit my website www.thevegastherapist.com

In this episode I tackle the topic of gaslighting. This tactic is something we have most likely all experienced whether we have recognized it as that or not. Gaslighting can occur in all types of relationships (parent/child, Boss/employee, and romantic). I discuss the signs to look for as well as the stages of Gaslighting in a relationship. The GasLight Tango, why people go along with the gaslighter and the power of fantasy will all be discussed. Finally, I will talk about turning off the gas and how to decide to stay or go in this type of relationship. You can follow me on Instagram @thevegastherapist.com or my website www.thevegastherapist.com

In this episode I welcome back Theo Fleury. Theo is perhaps best known for his time on the ice. But off the rink, his life once carried the markings of a troubled childhood, abuse and coping with emotional pain through addictive and self-destructive behaviours. Today, Theo defines himself as a victor over trauma and addiction, and a facilitator to those still trying to find their way. His best-selling books, Playing with Fire and Conversations with a Rattlesnake, encourage open sharing and provide practical tools that people seeking help can personally use. These tools are also useful to those who want to lead a productive conversation, called “Real Conversations”, with anybody else experiencing trauma. Theo and I talk about the state of mental health, the impact of Covid, and how our trauma has been triggered by the current state. We then tackle the topic of healing our trauma, the gifts of our pain, and the importance of connection. To know more about Theo check out his website www.theofleury.life You can follow me on Instagram @thevegastherapist or visit my website www.thevegastherapist.com

In this episode I talk about Loss. I recently lost my mom, who battled cancer for 2.5 years. I just wanted to share my experiences I have had over the last few weeks about grief and loss. I know I am only in the early stages of grief but there are some important things that I learned that I think will benefit anyone else going through this. As a bonus track I also include the talk I gave at my mom's funeral. Follow me at www.thevegastherapist.com or on Instagram @thevegastherapist

In this episode I tackle the topic of self doubt! This is something we all can relate to and have had to deal with at some level in our lives. Self doubt is the mental habit of questioning your own judgement and worth. There are different types of self doubt, including indecisiveness and the Imposter Syndrome that will be discussed. Self Doubt impacts our mental health and can keep us from living our full potential. In the episode I provide 4 tools for helping you break the chains of self doubt. Follow me on Instagram @thevegastherapist or go to my website www.thevegastherapist.com or www.ryanwynder.com

In this episode I welcome my guest Rachel Wherley to the show. She is better known and famous on Instagram as @thatlittlemom Rachel has mission to promote inclusion in her social media platform. She had to work towards inclusion most of her life and wants others to know not only her story, but how we can be more open as a society and help others feel more included. She attributes her sense of worth and her courage to a great family who never made her feel different or excluded. That gave her the courage to try many things and put herself out there in ways many of us never would. She has not shied away from the spotlight and has even been a stand up comic. Rachel is married and a mother, soon to be mother of 2! Her story is inspiring and a lesson for all of us to be more mindful of inclusion for others. In my part of the podcast I share some of the affects exclusion has on individuals, which include low self-esteem, depression, and anxiety. When it comes to change for this topic we all play a role! You can follow me on Instagram @thevegastherapist or my website is www.thevegastherapist.com

In this episode I discuss of the question of Am I good Enough (especially in the eyes of others) can consume our entire way of living. This question is unmatched in its capacity to both motivate and shame the human spirit. The source of the good enough dilemma is scarcity. Scarcity as Brene Brown describes is the never enough problem. Scarcity thrives in a culture where everyone is hyper aware of “lack.” Scarcity has 3 components: Shame, Comparison, and Disengagement. I also discuss our way out of the Good Enough Crisis! Follow me on Instagram @thevegastherapist or visit my website www.thevegastherapist.com

In today's episode I welcome in Heather Quisel to the show to talk about her life. Heather has been in the mindset and personal development space coaching business owners and entrepreneurs how to maximize their talents and increase profits through belief, focus, and disciplined actions. In one unexpected turn of events, her whole life changed...and so did her focus. The sudden loss of her husband, Larry, in 2018 left Heather to write a new About Me page: one she never wanted to write. But rather than lean into the pain and suffering of widowhood, she chose a story of resilience and overcoming adversity for her and her 3 children, and set out to create a life of love, happiness, and new memories despite their greatest tragedy. Today, Heather shares her grief journey and life after loss perspective and stories on Instagram, helping widows and people experiencing all forms of grief to heal their hearts, bodies, and minds and embrace their whole new world. In the episode Heather shares here story as well as 5 tools for healing from loss and other challenges in our life. This has something for everyone, we all have challenges and thus this episode has something for you! You can follow Heather on Instagram ( @heatherquisel ) and Facebook. You can also follow me on Instagram @thevegastherapist and also visit my website www.thevegastherapist.com