The Academic Imperfectionist combines philosophical analysis and coaching insights to help you dump perfectionism and flourish on your own terms. Your host is Dr Rebecca Roache, a coach and Senior Lecturer in Philosophy at the University of London.
You know all the advice about ignoring your inner critic, avoiding comparisons, and giving yourself credit for your achievements. But you can't shake the sense that the real you is something shameful, something you need to keep hidden at all costs, and that those people who say nice things about you would be horrified if they knew what you were really like. Friend, you've got Real You all wrong. The fact that there are parts of you that you'd hate to share with others doesn't make you wrong, or an impostor, or shameful. According to the sociologist Erving Goffman, you're completely normal. Your Imperfectionist Godmother is here to help you make friends with your secret self - and to see that everyone else has one too.Reference:Goffman, Erving. 1956: The Presentation of Self in Everyday Life (University of Edinburgh Social Sciences Research Centre).
Ah, the sabbatical. Getting one is like hitting the jackpot, right? All your problems would melt away if you had one. You'd go into it a frazzled, anxious, burnt out mess, and emerge serene, rested, and with a few dazzling additions to your CV. In fact, you'd be so sorted if you got a sabbatical that it's probably never occurred to you that you might need some hand-holding through the process.Enter our guest for this episode, Bethany Wilinski, Associate Professor at Michigan State University, sabbatical coach, and host of the Sabbatical 101 podcast. Bethany's own sabbatical experience taught her that, if you're not careful, a sabbatical can make you feel more burnt out and depleted, not less. She now works with academics to help them use their sabbaticals to rest, recharge, reconnect with what excites them, and relate to their work in a healthier way. Bethany is here to ensure that, if and when you're lucky enough to get a sabbatical, you can make it work for you.You can find Bethany's website, including a link to her podcast, here.
What's your reaction when your inner critic tells you that what you're doing is not good enough? If you think she's right, and that it's only thanks to her that you're getting anything done at all, you're not alone. But while you're busy listening to your inner critic, you're overlooking the fact that she's not helping you. In fact, she's making things worse. She's so greedy and impatient to get more from you that she's hurting your ability to get things done. She's killing your productivity, just like the farmer killed the goose that laid the golden eggs in Aesop's fable. Join your imperfect friend for an important fairytale lesson on the importance of self-acceptance.
Do you know how writing is supposed to feel when it's going well? If you're anything like I was a few years ago, you have some pretty bizarre ideas here, involving things like hours on end of laser-sharp flow, iron-clad willpower to resist distractions, and a mind that is drawn towards lofty ideas instead of flighty nonsense. The fact that my actual experiences with writing didn't remotely resemble this fantasy was, in my mind, due to my many shameful shortcomings. I'm not like that now, and my writing goes a lot better as a result. In large part, that's because I better understand what writing is really like. And in this episode I want to talk about an aspect of that: the writing warm-up.When you're done with this episode, why not go and listen to Bethany Wilinski interview me on her podcast, Sabbatical 101?
Are you entitled? If not, you should be. No, not like that. I'm not talking about over-entitlement, which these days seems to be what people mean when they talk about entitlement. We don't hear so much about under-entitlement: people who allow themselves to be short-changed by life because they don't realise they should be getting more. Or, rather, we do hear about this, but we don't talk about it using the language of entitlement. Does that matter? Yes, it does, because thinking of 'entitlement' as a dirty word is holding you back.
Focus your attention on what you can control. That's what the Stoics taught us. But if you're someone who responds to every bad outcome with guilt-filled 'If only I'd ...' thoughts, you might be overestimating how much lies within your control. Don't worry - we can fix that. Grab a cuppa and sit down with your Imperfectionist friend for the first solo episode of 2025.You can find the Wheel of Life exercise here, and the Core Values exercise here.
Have you ever wondered whether Stoicism might help you manage the stresses of modern life and find peace and satisfaction despite things being far more imperfect that you'd like? Have you ever wondered what Stoicism even is, other than a source of motivational poster slogans and the inspiration for 4-minute-read online articles called things like 'Use These 3 Stoic Hacks to Put Out Your Bin Fire of a Life'? You have? Then this is the episode for you. I interview my colleague, Professor John Sellars, who is not only a scholar of Stoicism, but is also devoted to helping people improve their lives by following Stoic principles. John Sellars is professor of philosophy at Royal Holloway, University of London, Visiting Research Fellow at King's College London, and Member of Common Room at Wolfson College, Oxford. He's a founding member of the London Centre for Ancient Philosophy and a member of two non-profit organizations aimed at bringing Stoicism to a wider audience, Modern Stoicism and The Aurelius Foundation. You can learn more about John, and find links to his books, articles, and more, at his website.Do you want to live like a Stoic for a week?Find The Academic Imperfectionist on Medium!
Friends, you are going to feel so SEEN in this episode. Kate Ahl is an integrative psychotherapist who has spent her entire life living and working with academics. She spent several years as an in-house therapist at Cambridge University, where she helped researchers and other university staff work through their emotional and interpersonal challenges. You might think your struggles are uniquely weird and shameful - but Kate has seen it all before, and she's here to give her compassionate, insightful take on why things are so hard and what to do about it. Find out more about Kate at her website, and sign up for her free online 'compassionate productivity' course - which I personally recommend! - here.Find The Academic Imperfectionist on Medium!
I know you love nattering about your research with your fellow nerds. But do you know how to talk about it with normal people too - without sending them to sleep or bombarding them with jargon? If this is something you'd like to be able to do but you're terrified by the idea and/or you don't know where to start, this episode is for you. My guest this week is Tony Stubblebine, CEO of the huge blogging platform, Medium. He has smart, interested, curious readers who are dying to know what you're up to, and he thinks there's nobody in the world who's more suited to giving them what they want than you. Hit the download button to find out how!Tony Stubblebine is the CEO of Medium. Previously, he was the owner of some of Medium's largest publications, including Better Humans, and is the co-founder and former CEO of Coach.me. He lives in New York.References:'How to publish your academic writing on Medium', by Zulie @ Medium'How to Use Psychology to Solve the Procrastination Puzzle', by Tim PychylOh, and you can now find The Academic Imperfectionist on Medium too!
Professor Stephanie Dunson is an award-winning scholar with over 20 years' experience as a writing process expert under her belt. She holds positions at Yale School of Management and the University of Connecticut's Department of English - and if you're thinking, 'Wow, that's quite a mix of disciplines!', that's because Stephanie's understanding of the process and practice of writing truly transcends disciplines. Come to think of it, it transends academia too: not only does Stephanie help academics, she also helps people in business use writing as tool to unlock insight and creativity. If you think of writing merely as a tool to help you turn thoughts into publications, Stephanie is about to open your eyes to how much more you can get out of the process. If listening to this episode leaves you hungry for more of Stephanie's writing-related insights, you're in luck! Stephanie hosts the wonderful podcast, 100 Mistakes Academic Writers Make ... and How to Fix Them. She also has a website where you can find out more about her work as a writing coach.
Do you know how to turn what you're interested in thinking about into something that other people want to read about? Do you even know what you're interested in, as opposed to what you think you should be interested in? Do you recognise that boredom and feeling lost are necessary and unavoidable parts of the research process, and that you can use them to your advantage? Do you know how to tap into your unique strengths and produce writing that's original and insightful? Do you realise that perfection is not only unattainable, but also - and this was a new one for me - boring? If you've ever struggled as a researcher, or if you're someone who helps students or other researchers, you need to hear this interview with Professor Thomas S. Mullaney and Professor Christopher Rea. They're the authors of the incredibly helfpul book, Where Research Begins, which I've recommended numerous times on this podcast. Thomas S. Mullaney is professor of history at Stanford University and a Guggenheim fellow. His books include The Chinese Typewriter: A History and Your Computer Is on Fire. You can find him on Bluesky or LinkedIn. Christopher Rea is professor of Asian Studies at the University of British Columbia. His books include Chinese Film Classics, 1922-1949 and The Age of Irreverence: A New History of Laughter in China. Where Research Begins has its own website, where you can learn more about the book, access additional (free!) resources, and contact Chris and Tom.Two books by other authors are mentioned in this episode. They are:Wayne C. Booth, Gregory G. Colomb, Joseph M. Williams, Joseph Bizup, William T. FitzGerald. 1995: The Craft of Research, now in its fifth edition, 2024 (Chicago, IL: University of Chicago Press). Umberto Eco. 1977: How to Write a Thesis, translated by Caterina Mongiat Farina and Geoff Farina, 2015 (Cambridge, MA: MIT Press)
Friends, it's the 100th episode! So, isn't it about time we talked about what perfectionism is, and why it's a problem? It's over 4 years since I recorded the first episode of this podcast, and I've learnt a LOT about perfectionism from the 99 episodes I've released so far - not to mention from the many hundreds of hours of coaching people I've done. Leave that unfinished project, that untidy desk, and that incomplete task list, and join your old imperfectionist friend for some perfection-related truth bombs.
It's a familiar story. We're feeling stuck and out-of-our-depth with our writing, so we decide we'll go and do a bit more reading - just, you know, to soak up some of the wisdom out there and become better informed and therefore better qualified to continue writing. But sadly, reading for these reasons ends up making us feel less informed and qualified, not more. Sometimes, when we're stuck, we need to write, not read. And when we do read, we need to have an agenda. We need to know exactly why we're reading. Step away from the library card, and let your Imperfectionist friend talk some sense into you.Reference:Mullaney, T. S. and Rea, C. 2022: Where Research Begins: Choosing a Research Project that Matters to You (and the World) (Chicago, IL: University of Chicago Press).
When I came across Dr Debbie Sorensen's recent article, 'How to recover from burnout', I knew I had to get her on the podcast! Debbie is a Denver-based psychologist with nearly 20 years of clinical experience, specialising in burnout, chronic stress, and anxiety. Her own struggle with burnout, along with her experience helping others, make her an absolute goldmine of insight and actionable strategies that you can apply to your own life. Stop fantasising about how today is the day you'll finally catch up on everything, get the kettle on, and settle down to listen to what Debbie has to say. You'll be glad you did.Debbie is the author of two books, ACT for Burnout and ACT Daily Journal, and a co-host of Psychologists Off The Clock podcast. You can find out more about Debbie by visiting her website.
What do you do when you have no idea? When you literally can't think of anything to write about? I don't know why I'm asking. I already know the answer: you panic and run to your favourite productivity websites for a new hack to solve it, right? And you definitely, definitely don't tell anyone, because struggling to come up with ideas is a shameful secret that you must guard with your very life. Friend, step away from the productivity hacks. Having no idea is something we've all experienced. It's even - hear me out - a completely normal part of the writing process. To fix it, though, you need to do something very scary. You need to relax and let go.
Have you ever thrown far more time and energy into your work than you get paid for? Have you ever said yes to a request to be on a dull and time-consuming committee because you want to show what a great colleague you are? Have you ever done too much for too little, because you hope that it will all pay off in the end when you get that secure job, that PhD position, or that grant? If so, my friend, you've been engaging in hope labour, and Dr David Brax is worried about you. With stress, burnout, and precarity rife in academia, Dr Brax is asking: should universities be profiting from the unpaid efforts of people who may or may not end up rewarded?Dr David Brax is a senior investigator at the Swedish Secretariat for Gender Research at the University of Gothenburg. You can find him on Bluesky. Here's Google's English translation of a recent article that he wrote in Swedish about hope labour.
I know you think you shouldn't be making time in your life for hobbies, what with being so shamefully behind on your writing and everything. And I know that you know that, despite this, you probably should be making time for hobbies, because in theory you do actually need to relax sometimes, you suppose, so maybe you'll consider taking up chess or macrame or ice skating just as soon as you've caught up with everything you're behind on (or as soon as someone adds a 25th hour to the day, which is probably more likely). But did you also know that having hobbies helps you resist and correct your perfectionist tendencies? No? Hit the download button, snuggle up, and prepare to accept that maybe you should be taking that crash course in pole dancing after all.There's a free, online version of William James's Principles of Psychology here.Plucky Not Perfect podcast.
So, that last episode that didn't happen. What was going on there, then? It was burnout, friends. Followed by trying and failing to take some relaxing time off. It wasn't all in vain, though. Here are some reflections on burnout, the battle to relax, and the dangers of disconnecting from our own needs.References:Cohen, Josh. 2016: 'Is there more to burnout than working too hard?' The Economist, 29th June. Cohen, Josh. 2016: 'The way out of burnout', The Economist, 28th July.Hauser, CJ. 2019: 'The Crane Wife', The Paris Review, 16th July.
Your Imperfectionist pal here has lost count of the times she's recommended Joli Jensen's mind-bogglingly helpful book, Write No Matter What, to struggling, anxious academics. So, she was the perfect (sorry) choice for this podcast's very first guest interview! She's here to tell you about: - The damaging myth that academia is a writing-supportive environment- How adopting a 'craftsman' approach to writing can make it less stressful, and even pleasant- Three 'taming techniques' that you can use to develop a consistent, sustainable approach to writing- How our obsession with productivity is hurting us, and what we should do instead... and lots more. It's a long one, friends, so get comfortable, and bring snacks.Joli Jensen is Emerita Professor of Media Studies at the University of Tulsa.
Send us a Text Message.Remember that movie, Sliding Doors? Gwyneth Paltrow's character lost her job and then we saw how her life unfolded in dramatically different ways, depending on whether she missed her train or not. Your writing anxiety is a bit like this. The way you respond to your writing anxiety determines whether you'll find writing much easier or much harder tomorrow, and the day after, and the day after that. The stakes are high, but making the right choice is easier than you think. It only takes a few minutes. Get comfortable and have a listen.
Send us a Text Message.Does your writing time ever turn into a stressful nightmare? You don't make the progress you hoped in the morning, which means you need to be even more productive in the afternoon, but then you end up too stressed to start, and then it gets so late that you write the day off as a failure and promise to do better tomorrow ... except you start tomorrow stressed about how little you accomplished the day before, and the cycle repeats itself. Take a deep breath, friends. The Academic Imperfectionist is here to show you a way out of this nastiness.
Send us a Text Message.Athletes know that if they want to improve their performance, they need to incorporate rest into their training. You, on the other hand, are absolutely certain that if only you could write for 25 hours a day (which you can't because you're a terrible person) you'd be at the top of your game. Luckily for you, your Imperfectionist friend is here to talk some sense into you. References: Ansorge, R. 2022: 'Rest and recovery are critical for an athlete's physiological and psychological well-being', UCHealth Today (https://www.uchealth.org/today/rest-and-recovery-for-athletes-physiological-psychological-well-being/)Pang, A. S.-K. 2016: Rest: Why You Get More Done When You Work Less (London: Penguin)
Do you ever tell yourself that it's your own fault that you don't have what you want in life, because you just don't have the willpower do get it? If so, willpower is not your problem, and thinking otherwise is stopping you from flourishing. Your problem is your lack of clarity and focus about what you want. Yes, really. Now, download the shit out of this episode and have a listen.
Never give up, right? Winners never quit and quitters never win! All nonsense, I'm afraid. The sensible advice is much more measured and boring: quit when it's appropriate to quit. But how do you know when it's appropriate to quit? And have we really got quitting all wrong? Listen on, friends, and find out.Here's Annie Duke talking sense about quitting on The Spark podcast. Download the Core Values exercise here, and the 5 Whys exercise here.Reference:Duke, A. 2022: Quit: The Power of Knowing When to Walk Away (London: Penguin).
Did you know that your brain never devotes more than 0.5% of its power to important things like finding food, avoiding predators, thinking, perceiving, and feeling? And that this is because you're always bloody using the other 99.5% for comparing yourself unfavourably to other people? Admittedly, I just made that up - but you do spend far too much time and energy on comparison. You know you shouldn't, because it makes you feel bad. But there's another, seldom-recognised reason to avoid comparing yourself to others: comparison is a completely inadequate and very biased tool for self-evaluation.
I've been thinking: how might someone summarise the main bits of advice from all 85 (so far) episodes of this podcast? Gather round the virtual campfire, friends, and let's talk about those things that I can't seem to stop banging on about. They are:The reverse Golden Rule (don't treat yourself in a way that would be too disrespectful or unkind to treat another person)Understand your inner criticBeing mean to yourself doesn't help youReject binary thinking
Perhaps you're already familiar with what social psychologists have had to say about the fundamental attribution error, but did you know that it has a secret role in magnifying your anxieties about your worth? If you're prone to worrying about how everyone else in your field is more talented and smart than you are, then gather round. Your Imperfectionist friend is here to give you the real explanation - and the antidote.
Where did we all get this idea that if we want to succeed, we need to go faster? And that if we haven't succeeded yet, that must mean that we're probably not good enough? Sometimes, the reason we haven't succeeded isn't that we're not good enough, but that we haven't waited long enough. And that means that doing better doesn't necessarily require being better - it means holding on for longer. Swallow your impatience, friends, and gather round to hear about a key to success that is hiding in plain sight.Here's the tweet by Billy Oppenheimer discussed in the episode.
No, not like that. I'm not talking about how to achieve the ultimate happiness, eudaimonia, or enlightenment. I'm simply talking about how to enjoy your down-time without feeling like you're doing it wrong. If you've ever looked forward to a well-deserved day off and then settled down for some serious relaxation only to find yourself consumed by anxiety about whether you're enjoying yourself enough, this episode is for you.References:Diener, E., Sandvik, E., and Pavot, W. 2009: 'Happiness is the frequency, not the intensity, of positive versus negative affect', in Diener, E. (ed.) Assessing Well-Being: The Collected Works of Ed Diener, Social Indicators Research Series 39: 213-231.Mauss, I. B., Tamir, M., Anderson, C. L., and Savino, N. S. 2011: 'Can seeking happiness make people unhappy? Paradoxical effects of valuing happiness', Emotion 11/4: 767.
How well do you know yourself? Are there feelings that you have, or things that you care about, that you're in complete denial about? Trust me, there probably are - you just haven't noticed. And it's a problem, because until you can acknowledge the things that make you happy (or unhappy) and the things you care about, you can't even begin to build the life you want. Get the kettle on and join your Imperfectionist chum for some self-policing troubleshooting.
Are you hesitant to make certain changes in your life, like changing careers or ending a relationship, because you don't want the time and energy you've invested in your life so far to be wasted? If so, you're not alone - but you're wrong. Recognising that aspects of your life aren't working for you doesn't mean your efforts have been wasted. Your life isn't an essay draft, where bad choices and wrong turns get cut from the final draft. You're holding yourself back, and your imperfect friend is here to put a stop to it.
When you're procrastinating, reluctant to knuckle down and get on with your work, taking way too long to do what ought to be a straightforward task, do you respond with self-compassion and non-judgmental curiosity as you try to work out what the problem is? Thought not. Instead, you tell yourself that you're lazy and disorganised and shouldn't even have been allowed to graduate from primary school, don't you? There's a problem with that, though. You might think you're holding yourself to account and pushing yourself to aim high, but in fact you're standing in the way of your own progress. Here's what to do instead!Check out the brand new What Am I Afraid Of? exercise.
I keep getting asked what my working day looks like. You know, as if I've cracked this whole productivity thing. I definitely haven't, but I have managed to make positive changes over the past few years as a result of making the sorts of changes I talk about on this podcast. Let me tell you about how it's all gone - not so that you can do things the way I do them (please don't!), but so you can see that change really is possible. Oh, and I'm also going to tell you about Simba, our community cat, who has been CATapulted to fame over the past week or so.Donate to help look after Simba!
Your problem with self-compassion: the one that leads you to be kind and supportive to other people, but nasty and vindictive to yourself. One reason you struggle with the 'self' part of 'self-compassion' is that you view yourself as separate from other people. But what if you aren't? What if the gap between you and others is simply too small and inconsequential to support your difficult-to-shake belief that it's wrong to be nasty to people, unless the person you're being nasty to is yourself? Your imperfectionist friend is lobbing a giant metaphysics truth bomb that is going to blow apart your conviction that compassion is for everyone except you. Find Kristin Neff's website about self-compassion here.Reference:Parfit, D. 1984: Reasons and Persons (Oxford: Oxford University Press).
Here we are, a third of the way through January. Have you slipped up on your new year resolutions yet? Will you be kind to yourself if you do? Or will you tell yourself that you're a failure, you can't do anything right, you should just do everyone a favour and give up now? The thing is, friend, there's a dark side to positive change. Too many of us are motivated to change for the better because we don't think we're acceptable as we are. We don't feel entitled to ease back and enjoy life. We wouldn't know how. The idea of an ordinary, unremarkable life terrifies us. We like to think of our drive and ambition as positive things - but what if they're fuelled by our lack of self-acceptance? Get yourself comfortable, and let's look again at mediocrity.Find the 5 whys exercise here.Go here for 'The benefit of breaking your New Year's resolutions', my article for the IAI.'Overcoming the need to be exceptional' by The School of Life can be read here (paywalled) and listened to (not paywalled) here.
Are you a sucker for self-improvement advice that offers to overhaul your life for the better overnight, even though you know that (unfortunately) it's not that simple? Yeah, same. There's a reason you're attracted to advice like that, and there's a way to get the life you want. It's not instant or magic or even wall-to-wall rewarding, but it is possible, and it is worth doing. Pull up a virtual chair, and let The Academic Imperfectionist explain all.
Yeah, I know you're diligently working towards that big goal, and that you STILL haven't got there yet. But are you stopping to reflect on your progress along the way, and to celebrate small wins? If the answer is no, then you're sabotaging yourself, chipping away at your motivation, and generally making yourself miserable. Progress tunnel vision can keep you stuck in a loop - but here's the Academic Imperfectionist with a lifeline!For the Progress Temperature Check exercise, go here. Go here for the Goal Contract exercise, and here for the Wheel of Life.Here's Rick Hanson's Psychology Today article, 'Recognize What Is Improving in Your Life'.
I know. Your life needs an overhaul, but where are you supposed to find the energy to fix it? You're struggling to keep your head above water as it is. The thing is, friend, not all demands on you are equal. The demands that are imposed on you by others exhaust you and send your anxiety skyrocketing - but those that you choose autonomously can energise you. Autonomy is important: just ask Immanuel Kant, John Stuart Mill, Isaiah Berlin, and Harry Frankfurt. How do you choose autonomously? I'm glad you asked.You can find the Identify Your Core Values exercise here, and the 5 Whys exercise here. Read a sample of For F*ck's Sake: Why Swearing is Shocking, Rude, and Fun here, and buy it in all the usual places!ReferenceMartina Svensson, Philip Rosvall, Antonio Boza-Serrano, Emelie Andersson, Jan Lexell, Tomas Deierborg, 2016: 'Forced treadmill exercise can induce stress and increase neuronal damage in a mouse model of global cerebral ischemia', Neurobiology of Stress, Volume 5, Pages 8-18.
Look at you there, always striving, always becoming, always hustling. When do you ever get to pause and just ... be? Do you even know how? Plenty of us don't. We had no problem just chilling and enjoying the moment when we were kids, but somewhere along the way, we lost that ability. We don't know how to enjoy life any more. In which case, what's the point of any of this? Put your existential angst on ice, friend, because The Academic Imperfectionist has you covered.Go here (and thank you!) if you'd like to donate to my fundraising for the brain injury charity, Headway.Read Laura Vanderkam's short article about savouring here.Reference:Bryant, F. B. and Veroff, J. 2007: Savoring: A New Model of Positive Experience (Routledge).
Just as trees aren't meant to remain stiff and unyielding in the face of a storm, you aren't meant to remain efficient and relaxed in the face of mounting demands. Bending isn't a weakness; it's what you need to do to survive. But it's only your branches that need to bend - your roots need to stay put. Do you know what your roots are? Snuggle up with a cuppa for some arboreal advice from The Academic Imperfectionist.For the 'Identify Your Core Values' exercise mentioned in this episode, click here.To read Julia Butterfly Hill's essay, 'Surviving the Storm: Lessons from Nature', click here.
Do you tell yourself that if only you had a day of uninterrupted time ahead of you (and, of course, the right stationery), you'd finally be able to get some writing done - only to procrastinate your precious writing time away when you do finally get what you need? Thought so. Your problem is that you wouldn't know a good writing opportunity even if it walked up to you and poked you in the eye. Put down that stationery catalogue and let your Imperfectionist friend sort you out.
Writing is why we all do what we do - or at least, a big part of it. But it's also a source of intense anxiety, whether we're new to it or whether we've been at it for years. So, here's another start-of-the-new-academic-year imperfectionist special for you. Your imperfect pal here set out to create a little survival guide for new students who want to get their essay-writing off to a good start - but along the way, it turns out that there are plenty of lessons about writing that are useful to revisit even for those of us who have clocked up thousands of hours of writing (and procrastinating). New pencils at the ready: let's get started!Here are the books on writing mentioned in the episode:Jensen, J. 2017: Write No Matter What (Chicago: University of Chicago Press).Sword, H. 2017: Air & Light &Time & Space (Cambridge, MA: Harvard University Press).
Do you ever try to read philosophy (or some other stodgy not-designed-for-entertainment text) and find yourself struggling to understand ... well, any of it? Do you finish reading a paragraph and find that you have absolutely no idea what it was about? Does it take you an entire day just to read one chapter? Of course not - you'd never admit to any of it, anyway. Even five-year-olds can read, so there's no way anyone's blowing the lid off your shameful reading troubles. But don't worry. Here's your Imperfectionist friend to lay it all bare and help make reading less of a time-consuming headache. (Spoiler: perfectionism is to blame, again.)
If you won't accept anything less than perfection from yourself, I have some disappointing news from Ancient Greece. Back in the 4th (ish) century BC, Plato was telling anyone who would listen that perfection doesn't even exist in the material world - so, save your energy and lower your standards. Get the kettle on and then gather round to learn what this means for you, from Plato, Socrates, and ... erm, the Barbie movie.Here's the monologue by American Ferrera (as Gloria) in Barbie:'It is literally impossible to be a woman. You are so beautiful, and so smart, and it kills me that you don't think you're good enough. Like, we have to always be extraordinary, but somehow we're always doing it wrong.'You have to be thin, but not too thin. And you can never say you want to be thin. You have to say you want to be healthy, but also you have to be thin. You have to have money, but you can't ask for money because that's crass. You have to be a boss, but you can't be mean. You have to lead, but you can't squash other people's ideas. You're supposed to love being a mother, but don't talk about your kids all the damn time. You have to be a career woman, but also always be looking out for other people. You have to answer for men's bad behavior, which is insane, but if you point that out, you're accused of complaining.'You're supposed to stay pretty for men, but not so pretty that you tempt them too much or that you threaten other women because you're supposed to be a part of the sisterhood. But always stand out and always be grateful. But never forget that the system is rigged. So find a way to acknowledge that but also always be grateful. You have to never get old, never be rude, never show off, never be selfish, never fall down, never fail, never show fear, never get out of line. It's too hard! It's too contradictory and nobody gives you a medal or says thank you! And it turns out in fact that not only are you doing everything wrong, but also everything is your fault.'I'm just so tired of watching myself and every single other woman tie herself into knots so that people will like us. And if all of that is also true for a doll just representing women, then I don't even know.'
I get it: you want to be less of a perfectionist, more confident and assertive, less of a procrastinator, and all the rest of it. These, after all, are things that hold us back - or so we often think. As it happens, though, things are more complicated than that. Those same traits that stand in your way are the same ones that have enabled you to achieve awesome things. Is there a way to get the 'awesome things' bit without the 'stand in your way' bit? Well, put up a chair, chum - the Academic Imperfectionist has some thoughts.
We all love a bit of productivity porn. What could be wrong with learning about how to get better at getting things done? Well, quite a few things, as it happens. Seeking out the latest productivity tools and techniques can be a way to mask the anxieties you have around your work. To avoid the pitfalls, you need to look inward and think about how you go about getting stuff done. Gather round, friends, and let's dive in.
We all hate failure. We're terrified of it. And so, when I chalked up a big fat failure a few days ago, I knew immediately that I needed to dissect it for you lot. The key lesson here? Our unwillingness to look failure square in the face is holding us back. Read Costica Bradatan's Psyche essay about Emil Cioran here.
We're constantly encouraged to strive for work/life balance. But it's a horrible, victim-blaming, damaging metaphor, and it tricks us into thinking we should take on more than we're able to cope with. And, besides, who wants to spend their entire career balancing stuff?! Your Imperfectionist friend is here with some truth bombs about how you ought to be thinking about how to manage all that stuff you have going on, and how you can view it all in a way that makes it easier to find and enforce healthy boundaries.To find the 'Identify your core values' exercise and the 'Wheel of life' exercise mentioned in the episode, go to The Academic Imperfectionist Resources page.
You know that remaining in your comfort zone is basically a psychic crime, right? Like, only losers do that. Successful people are out there pushing boundaries and loving life. Bummer that, by definition, they have to spend their entire time in discomfort, but whatever. Who needs comfort when you've got self-actualisation?Sorry pals, but this is all daft nonsense. Join your Imperfectionist friend for some truth bombs about comfort zones and a guilt-free pass to tossing that stick that you've been using to beat yourself.
Whatever it is that you're doing and however it is that you're doing it, you're telling yourself that you're doing it wrong and anyway you ought to be doing something else instead. Right? You feel guilty even when you know you're doing the right thing. You feel guilty even before you've decided what you have to feel guilty about. Your entire mind is an immersive, surround-sound, interactive theatre of turbo-charged guilt. Take a break from your hectic schedule of self-flagellation and let your Imperfectionist friend rein that shit in for you.