Enneagram and Marriage

Using the Enneagram in your marriage can be a beautiful tool for connection, but if we're not mindful, it can also quietly create barriers, misunderstandings, or even resentment. In this midweek reset, Christa offers a heartfelt reminder to approach the Enneagram with wisdom, grace, and a deeper understanding of your spouse's full humanity. Whether you're new to the Enneagram or have been diving deep for years, this episode is your invitation to pause, reflect, and make sure you're using it in a way that truly supports growth and love in your relationship. Tune in now for the encouragement you didn't know you needed—but won't want to miss. Watch on YouTube! Listen to Amy Wicks over at the Wholehearted Enneagram Podcast here! Find more about your type, the pod, freebies, and SO much more at our website right here! www.EnneagramandMarriage.com Leave Christa a podcast question anonymously by sending an MP4 recording to enneagramandmarriage@gmail.com. Love what you're learning on E + M? Make sure you leave us a podcast review so others can find us, too⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ here!⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

⁠Today we talk about AI and the dangers of losing human connection with a dear colleague and friend, Amy Wicks (Simply Wholehearted outreach and podcast), who many of our listeners know as an Enneagram coach and is also an Enneagram & Marriage Certified Coach as well! We're starting a second AI conversation (listen to the first here) which will will continue of how AI is changing our culture and lightening speed and what we can all begin to do about it. Do not use AI to get the skinny on this pod and miss this chance to engage your (actual) brain, heart, and body with us, as we dive deep together to at least somewhat untangle ourselves from the AI web that has befallen our culture. Watch on YouTube! Today we talk about AI and the dangers of losing human connection with a dear colleague and friend, Amy Wicks (Simply Wholehearted outreach and podcast), who many of our listeners know as an Enneagram coach and is also an Enneagram & Marriage Certified Coach as well! We're starting a second AI conversation (listen to the first here: https://podcasts.apple.com/jp/podcast/ai-in-your-marriage-for-better-or-for-worse/id1493137938?i=1000710264550&l=en-US) which will will continue of how AI is changing our culture and lightening speed and what we can all begin to do about it. Do not use AI to get the skinny on this pod and miss this chance to engage your (actual) brain, heart, and body with us, as we dive deep together to at least somewhat untangle ourselves from the AI web that has befallen our culture. Watch on YouTube! Listen to/watch Amy Wicks at Wholehearted! https://www.simplywholehearted.com/ and https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/simply-wholehearted/id1216920050 Sign up for the Washington Post AI Global Summit below and see other research pieces for this episode: https://www.washingtonpost.com/washington-post-live/global-ai-summit-2025/Read referenced articles on AI here!https://www.pewresearch.org/internet/2025/04/03/artificial-intelligence-in-daily-life-views-and-experiences/ https://www.nu.edu/blog/ai-statistics-trends/ https://builtin.com/artificial-intelligence/risks-of-artificial-intelligence dangers https://www.unicef.org/innocenti/generative-ai-risks-and-opportunities-children https://techcrunch.com/2025/07/21/72-of-u-s-teens-have-used-ai-companions-study-finds/ Leave Christa a podcast question anonymously by sending an MP4 recording to enneagramandmarriage@gmail.com. Love what you're learning on E + M? Make sure you leave us a podcast review so others can find us, too⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ here!⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Transform your marriage by understanding how the stories you tell about your partner's Enneagram type literally create your relationship reality. Marriage coach Christa dives deep into the psychology of narrative and reveals how negative internal stories become self-fulfilling prophecies that either invite growth or trigger defensiveness in your spouse. Discover the neuroscience behind why focusing on your partner's growth edges blinds you to their gifts, and learn the "both/and" approach that separates challenging behaviors from core identity. Explore how every type's greatest strength and biggest struggle are intrinsically connected, why defensive responses actually prove negative narratives "right," and how shifting your internal narrative changes your partner's capacity to show up differently. Master the art of holding both truth and grace simultaneously - acknowledging real growth areas while honoring the positive intentions behind difficult behaviors. Essential listening for couples ready to move beyond toxic storytelling patterns and create narratives that see their partner's highest potential while maintaining healthy accountability. Get healthy together as a couple this Fall! Begin your personal healing journey in the Enneagram Relationship Intensive with Christa⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ here!⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Leave Christa a podcast question anonymously by sending an MP4 recording to enneagramandmarriage@gmail.com. Love what you're learning on E + M? Make sure you leave us a podcast review so others can find us, too⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ here!⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Bill and Kristi Gaultiere discovered that before they could truly empathize with each other in marriage, they first needed to experience God's deep empathy for them. In this conversation, the Type 1 and Type 2 couple share how understanding their different Enneagram approaches to apologies and empathy transformed their relationship. They discuss practical calming exercises, breaking cycles of anger, and how each Enneagram type naturally blocks empathy. Bill and Kristi talk about their new book "Deeply Loved: Receiving and Reflecting God's Great Empathy for You" and share type-specific tools for building marriages where authentic connection feels safer than emotional withdrawal. Watch here on YouTube! "Reading this book is like sitting with close friends who truly get what you're going through."--Dr. Tim Clinton, president of the American Association of Christian Counselors (AACC) "Bill and Kristi Gaultiere have provided an oasis of care in the 'empathy desert.'"--John Ortberg, teacher at BecomeNew; author of Steps Next Steps: Get the brand new book by the Gaultiere Deepy Loved right here: https://a.co/d/iGXog7V Find everything you need from Bill and Kristi here at Soul Shepherding https://www.soulshepherding.org/ Find Soul Shepherding at Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/soulshepherding/?hl=en Come on retreat with them! https://www.soulshepherding.org/institute/ Get healthy together as a couple this Fall! Begin your personal healing journey in the Enneagram Relationship Intensive with Christa⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ here!⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Leave Christa a podcast question anonymously by sending an MP4 recording to enneagramandmarriage@gmail.com. Love what you're learning on E + M? Make sure you leave us a podcast review so others can find us, too⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ here!⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Join us for a heartwarming conversation with Dave and Ann Wilson, the beloved husband-and-wife team behind FamilyLife Today and former co-founders of Kensington Church in Michigan. As two Enneagram 7s married for over 40 years (and former Detroit Lions chaplains!), they share the beautiful chaos and hard-won wisdom of building lasting love when you're both wired for joy, adventure, and avoiding the hard stuff. We dive into Ann's new book "How to Speak Life to Your Husband: When All You Want to Do Is Yell at Him," exploring the fascinating dynamics of criticism versus encouragement, what men actually hear when women express frustration, and how couples can break negative cycles while honoring their type patterns. Whether you're a fellow 7, married to one, or just curious about how personality shapes our closest relationships, this episode offers practical wisdom wrapped in the kind of hope and authenticity that makes marriage feel possible again. Watch on YouTube Get Ann's new book: https://a.co/d/a7Ok2NU Catch them on the Family Life Podcast! https://www.familylife.com/familylife-today/ Get healthy together as a couple this Fall! Get early bird rates right here for your personal healing journey in the Enneagram Relationship Intensive with Christa⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ here!⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Leave us a comment or question by sending an MP4 recording to enneagramandmarriage@gmail.com. (You can use your voice memos app on your phone to record). Love what you're learning on E + M? Make sure you leave us a podcast review so others can find us, too⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ here!⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Learn how to break destructive protest behavior cycles before they destroy your marriage! In Part 2 of the protest behaviors series, marriage therapy expert Christa Hardin explores why these patterns escalate from mild criticism or withdrawal to explosive fights and emotional shutdown. Discover childhood origins of each Enneagram type's specific protest strategies, from Type 8s who learned vulnerability was dangerous to Type 5s who learned people drain them. Learn general and type-specific ways to create emotional safety that prevents protesting, how to respond during protest episodes to de-escalate rather than inflame, and repair strategies that actually heal after damage occurs. Includes the escalation pattern most couples miss and practical tools for building marriages where direct communication feels safer than protesting. Watch on YouTube! Get healthy together as a couple this Fall! Get early bird rates right here for your personal healing journey in the Enneagram Relationship Intensive with Christa⁠⁠⁠⁠ here!⁠⁠⁠⁠ Listen to Christa on The Allender Center Podcast here! Leave us a comment or question by sending an MP4 recording to enneagramandmarriage@gmail.com. (You can use your voice memos app on your phone to record). Love what you're learning on E + M? Make sure you leave us a podcast review so others can find us, too⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ here!⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Uncover the hidden drama sabotaging marriages everywhere! Marriage coach Christa explores protest behaviors - the unconscious patterns where spouses criticize, withdraw, create drama, or become passive-aggressive instead of directly communicating their needs. Discover why your partner acts out instead of speaking up through specific protest behaviors for each Enneagram type, from Type 1 criticism when feeling unappreciated to Type 9 passive resistance when feeling unheard. Learn why we protest instead of asking directly (fear, past rejection, learned patterns) and discover the "protest to request" translation guide that ends sabotage and creates real connection. Includes practical solutions for recognizing your own hidden drama patterns and responding to your partner's underlying needs rather than their difficult behavior. Watch on YouTube! Want to get healthy together as a couple this Fall? Get early bird rates right here for your personal healing journey in the Enneagram Relationship Intensive with Christa⁠⁠⁠ here! ⁠⁠⁠ Leave us a comment or question by sending an MP4 recording to enneagramandmarriage@gmail.com. (You can use your voice memos app on your phone to record). Love what you're learning on E + M? Make sure you leave us a podcast review so others can find us, too⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ here!⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Discover an extraordinary journey from gang violence and homelessness to a PhD and community leadership in today's pod! Dr. Terence Lester and his wife, Cecilia Lester share how he went from high school dropout living in his car to earning five degrees and becoming a powerful advocate for educational justice and how they, as a couple, have been helping those with debilitating trauma. This dynamic duo love in motion Type 8/7 marriage reveals how they channel their different energies into founding Love Beyond Walls nonprofit and fighting systemic barriers in education. Based on his book "From Dropout to Doctorate: Breaking the Chains of Educational Injustice," learn how a trauma-informed approach to helping those in dire need can transform lives and communities. How does a busy couple like this stay strong? Learn also how their marriage survives the demands of advocacy work. Perfect for you as you aim to get healthy for yourself and for those who desperately need your combined gifts, too. Watch on YouTube! https://youtu.be/ipNAK9cBy54 Get Terence's brand new book here on Amazon! https://www.amazon.com/Dropout-Doctorate-Breaking-Educational-Injustice/dp/1514011484 Get it on InterVarsity Press (IVP) website: https://www.ivpress.com/from-dropout-to-doctorate?srsltid=AfmBOortg_k40kfA45eBEUoWE_Y1G6TDPvHhpB8ujEL37J4ej6g-jI9H Find Terence 100K+ account here! https://www.instagram.com/imterencelester/?hl=en Want to get healthy together as a couple this Fall? Get early bird rates right here for your personal healing journey in the Enneagram Relationship Intensive with Christa⁠⁠ here! ⁠⁠ Leave us a comment or question by sending an MP4 recording to enneagramandmarriage@gmail.com. (You can use your voice memos app on your phone to record). Love what you're learning on E + M? Make sure you leave us a podcast review so others can find us, too⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ here!⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Transform your weekends from exhausting catch-up time to genuine restoration! Marriage coach Christa explores how to create weekend rhythms that actually renew your energy, strengthen relationships, and feed your soul. Discover why constant stimulation prevents emotional processing and learn practical strategies for restorative movement , delicious slow food pairings, putting good things in your mind, and including something special that's uniquely yours. This episode is perfect for individuals and couples wanting to build stronger marriages through intentional weekend time and families seeking rhythms that restore rather than deplete. From spiritual practices to practical implementation, discover why weekend restoration isn't selfish but strategic for showing up better in all areas of life. Need to get back to school for your relationship? The Enneagram Intensive enrollment is here as we feature Ken and Kathleen who walk us through their favorite parts of it! Want to get healthy together as a couple this Fall? Get early bird rates right here for your personal healing journey in the Enneagram Relationship Intensive with Christa here! Head on over to ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.enneagramandmarriage.com/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ to check out all of our amazing freebies and resources! Watch on YouTube here! Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@enneagramandmarriage⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ | ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Facebook @ enneagramandmarriage ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Have a specific question? ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Fill out this form to get your personal questions answered now! ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Leave us a comment or question by sending an MP4 recording to enneagramandmarriage@gmail.com. (You can use your voice memos app on your phone to record). Love what you're learning on E + M? Make sure you leave us a podcast review so others can find us, too⁠⁠⁠⁠ here!⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Transform your evenings with sustainable routines inspired by Benjamin Franklin's daily reflection practice! Here in this fast-listen Fall opener, Christa shares her personal 5-9 routine and Reddit research on how people actually spend their after-work hours. Discover evening frameworks for Head, Heart, and Body types, plus the critical fitness reminder for those on GLP-1 medications (like Ozempic) about preventing muscle loss. Learn about "Goldilocks Hours" - your daily 3.5-hour Sabbath period - and how to create marriage rhythms that support both partners. From morning foundations (prayer, journaling, exercise) to evening connection (6-10 hours weekly for couples), this episode offers practical wisdom for making your after-work hours intentional without being perfectionist. Includes the 7-minute workout app recommendation and insights on work and rest as well! Need to get back to school for your relationship? The Enneagram Intensive enrollment begins back up soon! Details coming Wednesday Head on over to ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.enneagramandmarriage.com/⁠⁠⁠⁠ to check out all of our amazing freebies and resources! Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠@enneagramandmarriage⁠⁠⁠⁠ | ⁠⁠⁠⁠Facebook @ enneagramandmarriage ⁠⁠⁠⁠ Have a specific question? ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Fill out this form to get your personal questions answered now! ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Leave us a comment or question by sending an MP4 recording to enneagramandmarriage@gmail.com. (You can use your voice memos app on your phone to record). Love what you're learning on E + M? Make sure you leave us a podcast review so others can find us, too⁠⁠⁠ here!⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Join marriage coach Christa for a delightfully honest audio diary of her European family adventure! From London subway mishaps to finding her great-grandmother's mysterious grave on the Croatian island of Mali Lošinj, this episode captures the beautiful chaos of ambitious travel with heart and humor. Experience the highs and lows of trains through the English countryside to inside of Jane Austen's home where she wrote all of her books, experience Parisian haircut disasters, Venice joys and navigation challenges, and ferry rides to family history. As a 749 tritype with big dreams and bigger heart, Christa shares how travel mishaps became meaningful memories, why following family mysteries across oceans matters, and how adventure can deepen both family bonds and marriage connection. Perfect for anyone who loves travel stories, family legacy exploration, or just needs a good laugh about the reality behind Instagram-perfect vacation posts. Head on over to ⁠⁠⁠https://www.enneagramandmarriage.com/⁠⁠⁠ to check out all of our amazing freebies and resources! Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠@enneagramandmarriage⁠⁠⁠ | ⁠⁠⁠Facebook @ enneagramandmarriage ⁠⁠⁠ Have a specific question? ⁠⁠⁠⁠Fill out this form to get your personal questions answered now! ⁠⁠⁠⁠ Leave us a comment or question by sending an MP4 recording to enneagramandmarriage@gmail.com. (You can use your voice memos app on your phone to record). Love what you're learning on E + M? Make sure you leave us a podcast review so others can find us, too⁠⁠ here!⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Navigate the midnight hours of life and faith with profound wisdom from author Aubrey Sampson, Enneagram 4 (4-7 pairing), as we discover what we actually find in spiritual darkness through Aubrey's soul-wrenching journey of losing her best friend Jen and encountering the "dark night of the soul." Learn why spiritual dryness isn't failure but invitation, how to support others through their darkest seasons without trying to fix them, and why some of our most profound encounters with God happen when He feels most absent. Aubrey offers honest hope for anyone walking through grief, spiritual darkness, or seasons when faith feels impossible - showing how the midnight hours can become places of sacred encounter rather than spiritual failure. Based on her book "What We Find in the Dark," this conversation provides hard-won wisdom for finding God's presence in the very places where He seems most hidden. Watch on YouTube! Get Aubrey's book, "What We Find in the Dark: Loss, Hope, and God's Presence in Grief" here: https://a.co/d/3fRiNDg Get The Message Devotional Bible for Women by NavPress that Aubrey contributed devotionals to here: https://a.co/d/6ms07oQ Check out Aubrey's Substack here: https://aubreysampson.substack.com/ Visit Aubrey's Instagram here! https://www.instagram.com/aubsamp/?hl=en More about Aubrey: About AubreyAubrey (M.A. Evangelism and Leadership)co-planted and co-pastors Renewal Church in Chicagoland. She speaks across the country at churches and other ministry events. She is an award-winning author, the host of the Together We Rise podcast (Women Speakers Collective), and host of the What We Find in the Dark Podcast. She also coaches women in ministry with Propel Women Cohorts.  Aubrey is passionate about helping hurting people find God's presence in their pain. She and her husband Kevin, and their three hilarious sons, live, minister, and play in the Chicagoland area.Aubrey is the author of several books, including What We Find in the Dark: Loss, Hope, and God's Presence in Grief (NavPress, 2025), children's book Big Feelings Days: A Book About Hard Things, Heavy Emotions, and Jesus' Love (NavPress, 2023), Known: How Believing Who God Says You Are Changes Everything, The Louder Song: Listening for Hope in the Midst of Lament (NavPress, 2019) and Overcomer: Breaking Down the Walls of Shame and Rebuilding Your Soul (Zondervan, 2015).  Head on over to ⁠https://www.enneagramandmarriage.com/⁠ to check out all of our amazing freebies and resources! Instagram: ⁠@enneagramandmarriage⁠ | ⁠Facebook @ enneagramandmarriage ⁠ Have a specific question? ⁠⁠Fill out this form to get your personal questions answered now! ⁠⁠ Leave us a comment or question by sending an MP4 recording to enneagramandmarriage@gmail.com. (You can use your voice memos app on your iPhone to record). Love what you're learning on E + M? Make sure you leave us a podcast review so others can find us, too⁠ here!⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Discover your relationship's hidden superpowers through summer blockbuster wisdom! Christa (7) and Melody (9) explore how storylines and superhero teams demonstrate the best and worst of personality . Analyze the way the SP, SX, and SO instincts in Jurassic World Rebirth go right and wrong, Fantastic Four's perfect type diversity, and dive deep into Cobra Kai's complex dynamics (shadows and shine) where Johnny's Type 8 journey from domination to protection pairs with Daniel's Type 1 evolution from rigid perfectionism to flexible excellence. Best of all, notice the ultimate glow happens when former enemies combine their different approaches. This fun summer episode proves that your differences aren't obstacles - they're your secret weapons for creating legendary love together! YouTube: https://youtu.be/UkgRctJODLs Head on over to https://www.enneagramandmarriage.com/ to check out all of our amazing freebies and resources! Instagram: @enneagramandmarriage | Facebook @ enneagramandmarriage Have a specific question? ⁠Fill out this form to get your personal questions answered now! ⁠ Leave us a comment or question by sending an MP4 recording to enneagramandmarriage@gmail.com. (You can use your voice memos app on your iPhone to record). Love what you're learning on E + M? Make sure you leave us a podcast review so others can find us, too here! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Have you noticed humans learn better through story, metaphor, and the five senses than through thinking alone? Discover the fun of personality growth through the extraordinary lens of personality patterns we see mirrored in nature this late summer with Dr. Angela Rosenberg, Type 2, author of her book "Being on the Wing: Feathered Reflections on the Enneagram Subtypes." Whether we are lively and animated or more calculated and affirming, learn why observation and stepping into nature can help us to accelerates personal growth as we learn from both metaphor and what we can see so obviously in nature about styles of engagement. This end of summer episode is perfect for nature lovers, Enneagram enthusiasts, and anyone seeking to understand their personality through the wisdom of the natural world. Watch on YouTube here! Read Dr. Rosenberg's Enneagram book here! https://a.co/d/2rMRr55 Read Dr. Rosenberg's other book, Nine Perfect Petals, here (flowers): https://a.co/d/2sVNZi9 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Discover your intimate superpower through sexual integration! In this finale episode, marriage coach Christa reveals what healthy sexual expression looks like for each Enneagram type - from Type 1's relaxed presence finding perfection in imperfect moments to Type 8's gentle strength and vulnerable power. Learn how sexual integration isn't about becoming someone else but accessing your most authentic self in intimate connection. Explore each type's integration path: Type 2's balanced giving and receiving, Type 5's generous energy sharing, Type 7's present-moment depth, and more. When both partners practice sexual integration, intimate life becomes a laboratory for wholeness and spiritual practice. Watch on YouTube! Visit www.EnneagramandMarriage.com for all your relationship needs! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Navigate sexual challenges with compassion through understanding Enneagram shadows in intimacy! Marriage coach Christa explores how each type's protective patterns create predictable conflicts - from Type 1 perfectionism blocking pleasure to Type 8 intensity overwhelming partners to Type 9s disconnecting during intimate moments. Discover common type conflicts like structure vs. spontaneity (1 vs. 7), emotional connection vs. space needs (2 vs. 5), and performance vs. presence (3 vs. 9). Learn why sexual shadows aren't flaws but growing edges, and how intimacy accelerates personal development by revealing protection patterns. Includes the transformational Shadow to Light Practice for turning challenges into connection opportunities. Stop taking sexual difficulties personally and start seeing them as invitations to grow together. Visit www.EnneagramandMarriage.com for all your relationship needs! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Discover the secret pleasure languages that could revolutionize your intimate connection! In this episode of the summer sizzle series, marriage coach Christa reveals how each Enneagram type has a unique way of experiencing and expressing physical pleasure - from visual connection (Types 1,4,7) to touch-centered intimacy (Types 8,9,2) to auditory appreciation (Types 3,6,5). Learn why Type 8s need powerful intensity, how Type 5s experience pleasure through mindful presence, and why Type 4s crave emotional depth with visual romance. Through the foundation of authentic acceptance - loving your partner's pleasure language exactly as it is - discover how to speak their body language fluently. Includes the game-changing Pleasure Mapping Exercise and energy pattern awareness for couples. Stop speaking your own pleasure language to your partner and start creating magic by understanding their unique pathway to connection and joy. Get your Dating Divas Bundle of 26 Marriage items here for a limited time! ⁠https://shop.thedatingdivas.com/discount/CHRISTA2025?redirect=%2Fproducts%2Fmarriage-bundle-2025⁠ and use code CHRISTA25 if the discount doesn't get taken in cart! Visit www.EnneagramandMarriage.com for all your relationship needs! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Understanding how your partner receives intimate invitations is just as important as how they initiate them! Discover why response styles have everything to do with personality as you learn about the gentle approach types, those who need beautiful and unhurried environments, and those who just need to know you see them in their joyful enthusiasm. We also talk about the art of saying "no" well, too, and coming back together again as well. Don't miss this excellent opportunity to refresh or recharge your love life with this quick but ESSENTIAL episode! Get your Dating Divas Bundle of 26 Marriage items here for a limited time! https://shop.thedatingdivas.com/products/marriage-bundle-2025 and use code CHRISTA25 if the discount doesn't get taken in cart! Visit www.EnneagramandMarriage.com for all your relationship needs! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Discover why you and your partner seem to have completely different experiences during intimacy! In this revelatory episode, Christa explores how your Enneagram type determines whether you connect sexually through your body (Gut Types 8, 9, 1), emotions (Heart Types 2, 3, 4), or mind (Head Types 5, 6, 7). Through real couple stories like Sarah & Mike's breakthrough from "mismatched libidos" to deep connection, you'll understand why Type 8s show love through intensity, how Type 2s can balance giving with receiving, and why Type 5s need energy management for intimate vulnerability. Learn the powerful "Three Centers Check-In" practice that honors where you both are and creates connection that includes your whole selves. Stop feeling disconnected even when you're physically close - start understanding and celebrating your beautiful differences in sexual expression. Get your Dating Divas Bundle of 26 Marriage items here for a limited time! https://shop.thedatingdivas.com/products/marriage-bundle-2025 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Discover the secret language of sexual initiation in marriage through the Enneagram! In this groundbreaking episode, marriage coach Christa explores how each of the nine personality types initiates intimacy in completely different ways - and why misreading these signals creates disconnection in the bedroom. Learn about the three distinct initiation styles: Direct Initiators (Types 8, 3, 7) who pursue with confidence and clarity, Subtle Signalers (Types 2, 6, 9) who create atmosphere and gentle invitations, and Atmospheric Creators (Types 1, 4, 5) who set the perfect conditions for connection. Through real marriage stories and practical tools like "The Initiation Translation Game," you'll finally understand why your partner's way of starting intimate moments might look nothing like yours - and how to respond with enthusiasm instead of confusion. Stop waiting for your partner to initiate YOUR way and start recognizing THEIR unique love language in action. Watch on YouTube! Learn more about www.EnneagramandMarriage.com here! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

What if the secret to a happy marriage isn't finding the right person, but creating the right conditions for joy to flourish together? In this uplifting episode, discover why happiness in marriage is less about constant bliss and more about intentional practices that build lasting joy. Learn the difference between fleeting pleasure and sustainable happiness, explore the five pillars of marital joy (shared gratitude, playful connection, meaningful rituals, growth mindset, and service together), and discover practical tools like the joy or gratitude journal practice and simple happiness experiments that successful couples use to cultivate daily delight. Through inspiring real-life stories and research-backed strategies, understand how to shift from waiting for happiness to happen to actively creating it together - because the couples who thrive don't just fall in love, they fall in joy. Find more help for your relationship, including coaching help and our membership here at www.EnneagramandMarriage.com or find some of our summer fun mystery games at www.SupperSleuths.com Get ready for the Dating Divas sale that begins here July 13, 2025 for $15 off! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Tired of the mental exhaustion that comes from constantly wondering what others think of you? In this episode, bestselling author and pastor Sharon Hodde Miller, Enneagram 7 (7-3 pairing) reveals why examining our life without just gazing inward, but also up at God and outwardly to others can also help us to break free from the self-focused scripts that keep us trapped in insecurity. Although some Enneagram patterns fuel self-preoccupation, others fuel giving in excess so today we talk candidly for all types about what it looks like to find true rest in our relationship with God rather than our performance. Whether you're a perfectionist who can't stop self-critiquing or someone whose marriage triggers more anxiety than peace, this conversation offers a grace-filled path to freedom from the exhausting cycle of self-focus that keeps us from truly connecting with God and others. Watch on YouTube! Sharon's book, Free of Me, JUST relaunched here! https://a.co/d/0Bnrggf Her beautiful book devotional, Gazing at God, is on sale for pre-order here! https://a.co/d/f9U3PEz Follow Sharon on Instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/sharonhmiller/?hl=en For more relationship tips, allow yourself time to peruse our page right here! www.EnneagramandMarriage.com Find all things Enneagram & Marriage on Instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/enneagramandmarriage/?hl=en Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Sometimes the most powerful chains in marriage are the ones we can't see. In this transformative episode, discover how to identify and break free from the four invisible patterns that keep couples stuck: the Scorekeeper Chain (mental tallies and resentment), the Mind-Reading Chain (expecting partners to anticipate needs), the Perfection Chain (redoing your partner's efforts), or any past-pattern fun/blindly following family-of-origin habits. Through real couple success stories and practical tools, learn how awareness + compassion + choice + action equals true relationship freedom. Stop fighting each other and start fighting the patterns that bind you both - because the strongest marriages aren't perfect, they're free. Find more help for your relationship, including coaching help and our membership here at www.EnneagramandMarriage.com or find some of our summer fun mystery games at www.SupperSleuths.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

What can hobbits, elves, and the wisdom of Middle-earth teach us about relationships? In this special conversation, Christa sits down with Philip Nation, publisher at Thomas Nelson and lifelong Tolkien enthusiast, to explore the profound relationship wisdom hidden within J.R.R. Tolkien's beloved stories. From the faithful friendship of Sam and Frodo to Tolkien's own enduring relationships with family and friends, this episode uncovers timeless principles for building lasting connections. Philip shares how Tolkien's conceptualization of good and evil in every person and the "Gollum in all of us" can both humble us and also draw us back into the light of healthy fellowship in redemption. Watch on YouTube! You'll discover how themes of sacrificial love, patient perseverance, and unexpected grace from The Lord of the Rings and across Middle Earth offer hope and practical wisdom for real-world connections. Perfect for Tolkien fans, literature lovers, and anyone seeking deeper meaning in their relationships - whether romantic, family, or friendship. Includes book recommendations, insights from Tolkien's approach to relationships, and how beauty, truth, and goodness can strengthen all your important connections. Book recommendations in this episode: The Hobbit: https://a.co/d/2WjAMOA Lord of the Rings: https://a.co/d/e3dYL4v The Proverbs of Middle Earth: https://www.amazon.com/dp/0999591401?ref_=cm_sw_r_ffobk_cp_ud_dp_QVSYCRNNZADVJC737YW2&bestFormat=true The Letters of JRR Tolkien: https://a.co/d/73lAT0U The Strange Case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde: https://a.co/d/3Kitwsb Visit www.EnneagramandMarriage.com for more! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Here in this E + M mini, Christa explores the concepts of masculinity and femininity, as well as the tendency of certain types to lean toward different qualities, and how understanding this can transform your marriage dynamics. Learn which qualities come naturally to your type, which ones you might need to develop, and how accessing both strength and tenderness both offers us more resilient, balanced partnerships. Whether you're a Type 8 learning vulnerable collaboration or a Type 2 developing assertive boundaries, this episode offers practical insights for becoming more integrated, healthy, and awake in your relationships. Find more help for your relationship, including coaching help and our membership here at www.EnneagramandMarriage.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Join Christa for a crucial conversation with Rachel Clinton Chen, MDiv and faculty at The Allender Center, about spiritual abuse and its unique impact on marriages. Rachel brings both professional expertise and Type 2 heart-centered wisdom to this difficult but necessary topic. Discover how spiritual abuse differs from general church hurt, the specific challenges it creates for couples when one spouse's faith is shaken while the other's remains intact, and how partners can support each other's healing without minimizing their experience. Rachel shares insights on rebuilding trust in your own perceptions, navigating intimacy after spiritual trauma, and finding hope for post-traumatic growth. Whether you've experienced spiritual abuse yourself, are supporting someone who has, or want to better understand this critical issue, this conversation offers validation, practical guidance, and hope for the healing journey. Rachel's marriage to Reverend Michael (a beautiful 2-9 pairing) provides unique perspective on how couples can walk through spiritual trauma together while protecting their relationship during vulnerable seasons. Rachel has graciously offered our listeners 20% off The Allender Center's Spiritual Abuse & Healing Online Course here with code enneagrammarriage20 through December 2025. https://theallendercenter.org/offerings/online-courses/spiritual-abuse-and-healing/ Check out The Allender Center Podcast here, https://theallendercenter.org/category/podcast/ Find other courses and connections at The Allender Center at The Seattle School here: https://theallendercenter.org/ Find Rachel Clinton-Chen on Instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/rachaelclintonchen/?hl=en Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Join us for an inspiring conversation with filmmakers Nathan (Type 4) and D'Lytha (Type 5) Myers as they share their unique journey of marriage, parenting, and creating meaningful entertainment together. Nathan, known for his work on The Chosen and now running Grafted Studios, brings passionate creativity, while D'Lytha offers thoughtful wisdom. Together, they've created the award-winning film "Aria Appleton Shines," which tackles technology's impact on children and parental authority through the spunky and realistically spirited Gen Z/Alpha Gen Aria Appleton and her friends. Discover not only tech tips and more about the new movie, but also about how this couple's different Enneagram types create beautiful synergy in their marriage and creative partnership, how they navigate homeschooling decisions and running a production company together, and their approach to protecting children from unhealthy technology while embracing creative media. Whether you're interested in Enneagram dynamics in marriage, navigating technology with kids, or supporting faith-based entertainment, this conversation offers practical wisdom from a couple living out their values creatively and intentionally! Watch on YouTube! Watch the BRAND NEW award-winning film 'Aria Appleton Shines' and discover how this powerful story is helping families navigate technology with wisdom and intention. Film Website: https://www.ariaappleton.com/  Facebook:https://www.facebook.com/ariaappletonfilm/  Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/ariaappleton/?hl=en Learn more about your type and relationship at www.EnneagramandMarriage.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

What does it mean to bring light to the darkest seasons of life and faith? In this deeply moving post-Father's Day episode, Mike Donehey, lead singer of the reunited Tenth Avenue North, shares the heart behind their new album “Learning to Trust.” As a social Type 4 married to a Type 2, Mike demonstrates the courage to go to those dark feelings, sit with them, and grapple with them honestly—both in his music and his marriage. The album, which explores “the midnight hour in a person's faith,” was born from personal family struggles, including his 12-year-old daughter hitting rock bottom with anxiety and his own journey of learning to trust God when you can't see the path ahead. Mike opens up about how their lead song “Running with You in the Dark” captures the essence of moving forward with faith through uncertain seasons, and how influences like Jay Stringer's work on sexuality and faith have shaped their music. Whether you're walking through your own dark season, supporting your spouse through difficult times, or learning what it means to trust when life feels uncertain, this conversation offers both vulnerability and hope, with beautiful songs and timeless truths to guide you through. Find the album here on Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/track/0G3VRMNpInROdMyGAabE0t Find the band here: https://www.tenthavenuenorth.com/ Follow Mike with 300K others here on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mikedonehey/?hl=en Follow Tenth Avenue North on IG https://www.instagram.com/tenthavenuenorth/?hl=en Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

When emotions run high in relationships, knowing how to self-soothe can make the difference between connection and disconnection. In this practical mini-episode, we explore a few way each instinctual variant, Self-Preservation, Social, and Sexual/One-to-One, approaches calming when feelings are intense. We also break down a bit further to designate heart types of each instinctual variant needing emotional safety, head types seeking mental clarity, and body types requiring physical grounding. In this mini-show, let Christa guide you to just a few ways you'll discover specific techniques that strengthen rather than strain your relationship so you can truly come back as healthily differentiated partners, rather than staying in the wounding together. For more relationship help or to sign up with an E + M Coach or affiliate, visit www.EnneagramandMarriage.com Visit our Instagram @enneagramandmarriage https://www.instagram.com/enneagramandmarriage/? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

What if the key to a stronger marriage isn't avoiding conflict, but learning to dig in and work through difficult moments? In this practical episode, marriage therapist and relational life therapist Zach Brittle, 8 brings over a decade of professional wisdom combined with personal insights from his Type 8-Type 2 marriage. Host of the popular Marriage Therapy Radio Podcast, Zach shares his gifted perspective on the stories that often lie beneath our relationship struggles and offers Terry Real's RLT (Relational Life Therapy) tips and a powerful 4-part formula you can use for getting unstuck again and again whenever conflict hits. As a Type 8 married to a Type 2, he opens up about how even two passionate types can learn to navigate tension in healthy ways, emphasizing that conflict isn't something to fear but a pathway to deeper connection. Whether you're afraid of rocking the boat or tend to dive headfirst into disagreements, Zach's blend of therapeutic expertise and real-life vulnerability offers hope and practical strategies for working through the messy, beautiful work of marriage. Follow Zach here on his website: https://zachbrittle.com/ Follow Zach at Marriage Therapy Radio here: https://marriagetherapyradio.com/ Find Zach on Instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/marriagetherapyradio/?hl=en Miss the Subtypes EnneaSummit? Get the all-access pass to the Enneasummit ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠here! https://www.tylerzach.com/subtypes/enneasummit-aap?ref=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.tylerzach.com%2Fa%2F2148111986%2FLS2nNmzL⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

What does it mean to age with strength and wisdom? In this powerful episode, Kathleen Henderson, 8 (8-9 pairing) shares her honest journey and OR nursing background to help others through health challenges, empowering you to use your voice and your spouse through the seasons through health challenges and through the evolution of marriage in later seasons of life. As a Type 8 married to a Type 9 with adult children, Kathleen opens up about self-advocacy in healthcare, life, and work settings, supporting her Type 9 spouse Ken through difficult health seasons, and the surprising ways her Type 8 energy has both served and taught her across seasons. From practical wisdom about preparing for life's later seasons to the liberating realizations that come with maturity, Kathleen's no-filter honesty addresses the realities many couples face but rarely discuss before they hit the harder moments. Show Notes: www.Drugs.com (This site tells you the percent of side effects you may experience as you deal with symptoms) The EnneaSummit is this week. To sign up for the EnneaSummit on Subtypes, ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠sign up here!⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Get the all-access pass to the Enneasummit ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠here!⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

As we step into a summer of refinement here at Enneagram and Marriage, what better time to focus on creating homes that truly work for our families? In this insightful episode, interior design and home organization expert and author Whitney English, Type 4 (4-9 pairing) shares her room-by-room approach to creating spaces that are both beautiful and functional. Whitney believes that anyone can live a beautiful life, that "if you're real you can't be ugly," and that everyone is creative—some of us have just forgotten. As a successful entrepreneur who's been featured in O Magazine, The Wall Street Journal, and on the Today Show, Whitney brings both design expertise and real-life family wisdom to the conversation. Discover how to assess each room in your home for what it truly needs—from the practical (garbage cans and scissors in the right places) to the aesthetic touches that make you actually want to spend time there. Whitney also opens up about her curiosity around her Enneagram perspective and how understanding her personality has helped her create organized systems without becoming harsh or demanding with her family, especially as she considers family of origin overlays many of us bring. Learn why the aesthetic of your home matters more than you think, how to balance beauty with functionality on any budget, and practical strategies for couples to create spaces that support both their relationship and family life. Whether you're naturally organized or struggle with clutter, Whitney's gentle wisdom will help you see your home as a place of intentional living rather than perfectionist pressure. Watch on YouTube! Get Whitney's book with SO much more practical info, "Organize First: From Clutter to Creativity," here: https://a.co/d/hPQ8MZU Visit Whitney at her beautiful website: https://whitneyenglish.com/ The Enneasummit is this week. To sign up for the EnneaSummit on Subtypes, ⁠⁠⁠⁠sign up here!⁠⁠⁠⁠ Get the all-access pass to the Enneasummit ⁠⁠⁠⁠here! More about Whitney: Whitney English believes that anyone can live a beautiful life. She believes that gratitude is the birthplace of joy, that people matter, that love is the answer, that everyone is creative and some of us have just forgotten, and that it's worth trying to be a better version of yourself today than you were yesterday. She has boot-strapped two businesses to seven figures, has a degree in interior design, studied management at Parsons in New York City, and has had her work featured in O magazine, The Wall Street Journal, and on the Today Show (twice). She was featured as one of Country Living magazine's Women Entrepreneurs, and one of her favorite dreams-come-true is her husband David, and their three children. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Is artificial intelligence becoming the third party in your marriage? In this timely episode, we explore the growing trend of couples turning to AI for relationship advice, planning, and emotional processing. Based on survey data from real couples, Christa unpacks three major benefits AI brings to marriage—from vacation planning to communication tools—and three significant concerns about emotional bypassing, digital intimacy, and false authority. Drawing from relationship research and real-world examples, including insights from Simon Sinek about the importance of authentic conflict, this episode offers practical guidelines for using AI to enhance rather than replace genuine marital connection. Whether you're AI-curious or concerned about technology's impact on relationships, this is a MUST-LISTEN as you gain clarity and conviction on how to navigate artificial intelligence's role in your most important human connections!! To sign up for the E + M Collective membership group for time live on Zoom with Christa, ⁠⁠⁠visit here!⁠⁠⁠ To sign up for the Enneasummit on Subtypes, ⁠⁠⁠sign up here!⁠⁠⁠ Get the all-access pass to the Enneasummit where Christa is speaking ⁠⁠⁠here! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this special Memorial Day episode, Enneagram Type 2 Kristen Strong shares her powerful journey as a social Enneagram 2 giver and also military wife who spent two decades moving across the world, constantly rebuilding friendships and community. Author of "Desperate Woman Seeks Friends," Kristen offers vulnerable insights into the acute loneliness facing all of us in the busy culture of today and practical wisdom for anyone struggling to make meaningful connections through busyness, loneliness, trust-breaking, and more. Through her experience as a military spouse and her Type 2 heart for helping others, Kristen addresses the crisis of friendship with both solid hope and actionable direction. Whether you've ever felt the sting of rejection, cringed at awkward friendship encounters, or wondered if you're the only one struggling to make friends, Kristen's honest conversation and game plan for building lasting relationships will encourage your heart. Join us for this heartfelt tribute and hopeful discussion about the friendships we all desperately need right here! Show links: Visit Kristen's website here! https://kristenstrong.com/ Read Kristen's new book here! Desperate Woman Seeks Friends: Real Talk About Connection, Rejection, and Trying Again for the Friendships You Need - https://a.co/d/0vZqsZ1 To sign up for the E + M Collective membership group for time live on Zoom with Christa, ⁠⁠visit here!⁠⁠ To sign up for the Enneasummit on Subtypes, ⁠⁠sign up here!⁠⁠ Get the all-access pass to the Enneasummit where Christa is speaking ⁠⁠here! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

What does it truly mean to love someone with your whole being? In this transformative episode, we explore the essential practices needed to move beyond surface-level connection into profound, soul-nourishing love. Drawing from both Enneagram wisdom and practical relationship insights, we unpack how your personality type influences your capacity for love, and offer compassionate strategies for breaking through the childhood patterns and defense mechanisms that limit your ability to love completely. Whether you're in a new relationship or a decades-long marriage, you'll discover actionable wisdom for loving more intentionally, vulnerably, and wholly—creating the foundation for the deeply connected relationship you desire. To sign up for the membership group for time live on Zoom with Christa, ⁠visit here!⁠ To sign up for the Enneasummit on Subtypes, ⁠sign up here!⁠ Get the all-access pass to the summit ⁠here! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Influencer and Coach (Enneagram & Coaching) Hillary McCaskey, 9w8 joins Christa to explore how her Enneagram type shapes her marriage to an 8. Together they discuss how Hillary's 972 Tritype influences her ability to support her Type 8 husband's dreams while finding her own voice—culminating in both a healthier and more attuned marriage as well as their bold decision to embrace a comfortable life on the road as the traveling duo @VanKaskeys on YouTube. Hillary also shares her powerful journey through grief and strength rising after losing her mother, a pivotal experience that awakened her strong 8 wing and transformed her approach to life and relationships. She opens up about navigating the challenges of conflict styles with her husband as well as fatigue as a 9 while accessing newfound strength. This episode offers valuable insights into the harmonious yet dynamic 8-9 pairing, showing how different types can complement each other while maintaining individual growth. Between these meaningful discussions of personality and relationships, Hillary and Christa share lighthearted moments about dogs, favorite coffee, and the unexpected joys of intentional living. Listen here to be inspired! Explore Hillary's Coaching Practice: https://enneagramandcoaching.com/ Explore Hillary's Popular Enneagram & Coaching Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/enneagramandcoaching/?igsh=NzM2eDgxd3B2Yzdl# Follow the VanCaskeys on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/vancaskeys or at their website here: https://www.youtube.com/c/vancaskeys To sign up for the membership group for time live on Zoom with Christa, ⁠visit here!⁠ To sign up for the Enneasummit on Subtypes, ⁠sign up here!⁠ Get the all-access pass to the summit ⁠here! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Christa takes you on a journey through the subtle influences of Enneagram wings in marriage relationships. In this illuminating episode, she explores how our wing tendencies can sometimes take over our interactions with our spouse without us even realizing it. From the silent withdrawal of a 1w9 to the stubborn resistance of a 9w8, Christa breaks down real examples of how each type's wings manifest in marriage - both helping and hindering connection. Discover practical strategies for finding balance and appreciating your partner's full Enneagram makeup while learning to temper your own wing influences when they become domineering. You're also invited to join our Enneagram + Marriage membership community where we dive deeper into these dynamics every month! Plus, don't miss the upcoming EnneaSummit this summer - tickets are available now. Listen for all the summer fun and relationship wisdom packed into this episode! To sign up for the membership group for time live on Zoom with Christa, visit here! To sign up for the Enneasummit on Subtypes, sign up here! Get the all-access pass to the summit here! Join E + M Coach Alicia Larkey's retreat here! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this powerful episode, former megachurch pastors Jimmy and Irene Rollins share their raw journey from a marriage that was "surviving, not thriving" to genuine transformation after addiction threatened everything they'd built. For fifteen years, the couple maintained a thriving public ministry while privately struggling—Irene battling alcohol addiction and Jimmy confronting generational patterns of dysfunction—until their 2015 breaking point forced them to seek authentic healing. Through an Enneagram lens, we explore how different personality types experience addiction, support recovery, and establish healthy boundaries. The founders of TWO=ONE Marriage Ministry offer rare insight into creating safety for vulnerability, maintaining hope during crisis, and rebuilding trust after betrayal. Their story illuminates how true connection emerges only when we risk complete honesty, making this essential listening for anyone navigating addiction in relationships or seeking to transform any marriage from functional to flourishing. Watch on YouTube! Follow the Rollins here on their website! https://www.twoequalsone.com/ Follow Irene, type 9 on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/irenerollins/?hl=en Follow Jimmy, type 7 on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/iamjimmyrollins/?hl=en For the Enneagram & Marriage membership, click here! https://www.enneagramandmarriage.com/membership For more on EnneagramandMarriage.com, visit here! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Just in time for Mother's Day, this special episode features Wall Street Journal bestselling author Jessica Turner sharing hard-earned wisdom about rebuilding when life veers dramatically off-script. Whether you didn't get to have kids, your marriage is different than what you wanted, or like Jessica, your marriage took a turn in a different direction, Jessica discusses how to navigate heartache, as she had to at the end of her 16-year marriage after her husband came out, transforming heartbreak into a powerful story of resilience that's now the foundation of her upcoming book "I Thought It Would Be Better Than This." As Mel Robbins notes, Jessica's journey will "speak right to your soul if you're wrestling with disappointment, heartache, or the curveballs life throws at you." Through a heartfelt lens with Jessica, today we process grief, reclaim identity, and find moments for self-care during life's biggest transitions. This conversation goes beyond typical Mother's Day sentiments to honor the strength it takes to write a new story when the original draft falls apart. Jessica's authentic insights offer both practical strategies and emotional permission to anyone standing at the intersection of "this isn't what I expected" and "where do I go from here?" Get Jessica's powerful book here for a mom you love: https://a.co/d/1BgPDuy Follow her blog and visit her website here: www.JessicaNTurner.com Follow her on Instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/jessicanturner/?hl=en Learn more about Enneagram & Marriage right here! www.EnneagramandMarriage.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this illuminating mini-episode for anyone who finds themselves in a reactive Enneagram Eight space, Christa unveils tools for finding and accessing the hidden vulnerability healthily beneath the Eight armor. Whether you're an Eight, have an Eight wing or arrow connection, or love someone with Eight energy, this episode offers crucial insights into navigating those critical moments when an Eight hits their wall. Learn why fight-or-flight responses are so instinctive for Eights and discover the powerful "3-3-3 Method" for processing emotions without feeling exposed. This episode goes beyond basic type descriptions to explore how Eights can access their strength through acknowledging vulnerability, and how loved ones can create safe containers that honor the Eight's need for both power and authentic connection. A must-listen for anyone seeking to understand the complex interplay of protection and vulnerability in the protective Eight's journey. Find more relationship tools at www.EnneagramandMarriage.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In today's episode, we challenge the common assumption that men always want more sex than women in marriage. Join us as we speak with J. Parker, author of "The Higher-Desire Wife," about the estimated 25% of marriages where wives have a higher sex drive at various seasons of marriage. We explore multiple causes of mismatched desire beyond stereotypes, from hormonal factors to relational dynamics, and discuss practical strategies for navigating these differences with compassion. This episode brings validation and hope to women and men who have felt isolated, bewildered, or ashamed of their sexual desires or lack thereof while offering insights for all couples experiencing desire discrepancies in their marriages. Watch on YouTube Get J's book, The Higher Desire Wife" here: https://a.co/d/boAliTx Visit J's website: https://hotholyhumorous.com/https://hotholyhumorous.com/https://www.hotholyhumorous.com Find more relationship tools at www.EnneagramandMarriage.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this stance episode, Christa helps you to explore how our emotional regulation patterns impact our closest relationships through the lens of stances. This episode dives into the three stress stances—moving against, moving away, and moving toward—and how understanding these unconscious reactions can transform your marriage. Whether you're caught in criticism-defensiveness cycles or pursuer-distancer dynamics, you'll discover practical tools to recognize your patterns, regulate your responses, and create deeper connection with your spouse. Learn how to turn triggering moments into opportunities for growth and intimacy in this thoughtful exploration of emotional intelligence in marriage. Find more relationship tools at www.EnneagramandMarriage.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

It's all been done. I can't start until it's perfect. What if the critics come? In this episode, Christa talks with Mary Marantz, Enneagram 4, about her journey from growing up in a trailer in rural West Virginia to becoming a Yale Law graduate, successful entrepreneur, and author, only to learn she was still underestimating herself. This empowering conversation explores how to overcome self-doubt, silence your inner critic, and stop playing small. Mary's powerful message will help you move from stuck to start, providing both inspiration and practical steps to push past fear and excuses. Join us for this transformative discussion with the host of the iTunes Top 200 podcast "The Mary Marantz Show" about embracing your worth and creating the impact only you can make, just as Mary shares insights from her perspective as an Enneagram 4 and discusses her brand new book "Underestimated" releasing tomorrow! Watch on YouTube Follow Mary here: https://marymarantz.com/ Get Mary's brand new book, Underestimated, here! https://a.co/d/e3eySUD https://www.instagram.com/marymarantz https://www.facebook.com/groups/marymarantzshow Find more relationship tools at www.EnneagramandMarriage.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Ever wonder why personal growth seems to follow predictable patterns of progress and plateau? In this illuminating episode, we dive into one of the Enneagram's most fascinating but rarely discussed aspects: moving around the whole Enneagram system. Learn how this powerful concept applies to everything from skill-building to relationship development, and why certain growth points require conscious attention to move forward. Whether you're an Enneagram enthusiast wanting deeper understanding beyond type descriptions or someone curious about the hidden rhythms of personal transformation, this episode offers practical insights for recognizing where you are in various growth cycles and how to navigate the journey more consciously—both individually and in partnerships. Join us as we decode relationships and explore how we can continue to find personal growth, relationship challenges, and spiritual development. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this illuminating episode of the Enneagram and Marriage Podcast, we welcome Philip Nation, Vice-President/Publisher of Thomas Nelson Bibles and acclaimed author (Enneagram 4) to explore the powerful intersection of faith, scripture study, and marital connection. Philip shares his expertise on making the Bible accessible in relationships, offering practical wisdom for individual study as well as couples engagement on how to engage with scripture together. From his insights on The OPEN Bible's 50th Anniversary Edition to tailored study approaches that honor different personality types, this conversation provides individuuals and couples with tools to deepen both their spiritual journey and relationship intimacy. Whether you're newlyweds or celebrating decades together, Philip's balanced perspective on scripture study as a relationship practice will inspire meaningful connection with both your spouse and sacred texts. Philip Nation is the Vice-President/Publisher of Thomas Nelson Bibles. He has served as a pastor, church planter, and education minister in local churches. He frequently travels to speak in churches and for conferences. Philip earned a Doctor of Ministry from Southeastern Baptist Theological Seminary. He has authored and edited numerous books and Bible studies. Philip is a University Fellow for Arizona Christian University and has been a professor for Union University and Houston Christian University. Show links: View the Bible, including the Open Bible and the Abide Bible Phil recommends: https://www.thomasnelson.com/bibles/ Thomas Nelson Bibles: https://www.facebook.com/NelsonBibles/ The NKJV Bible: https://www.facebook.com/TheNKJVBible/ Nelson Bibles: https://www.instagram.com/nelsonbibles/ The NKJV Bible: https://www.instagram.com/thebiblenkjv/ The Open Bible https://youtu.be/Wx-uV4o7r9M Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this special mid-week mini episode, Christa explores the ancient practice of biblical lament as a pathway to deeper intimacy with God and our spouses. Discover why expressing honest sorrow and questions to God isn't just permitted but modeled throughout scripture—from the Psalms to Jesus himself on the cross. Learn how each Enneagram type bypasses lament or grief differently, and how understanding these patterns can help couples create sacred space for lament together. The episode offers practical day-by-day guidance for Holy Week, from a movement from mourning to dancing —not rushing to resurrection but finding Christ's presence in the shadows of the cross first. A timely reminder - listen here! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this engaging episode, Brad and Sarah Johnson, a couple of over twenty years and co-founders of Triad Partners reveal how life as an entrepreneurial couple creates both unique challenges and extraordinary strengths in their marriage, family, and business. Brad and Sarah (types 7 and 6 pairing) share candidly about their journey and deep dive with us to the dark night of the soul moment of their marriage to climbing metaphorical mountains together, recognizing their different approaches to risk, planning, and connection to leveraging these differences to lead a thriving organization serving top 1% financial advisors and most importantly, making sure they don't lose their conection in the process of building their dreams. Discover their weekly relationship check-in ritual that's transformed their communication, how they navigate Sarah's security-seeking Type 6 energy with Brad's spontaneous Type 7 spirit, and practical insights for any couple balancing work and life together. The triad motto "Do Business, Do Life" comes alive through stories of how they've built a 100+ employee company while nurturing their relationship. If you're interested in how different Enneagram types can create powerful partnerships at home even amid work challenges, this conversation offers wisdom for turning potential friction points into your relationship and business's greatest assets. Watch on YouTube: https://youtu.be/wT8PKMkIzHQ BRAD & SARAH'S SUNDAY CHECK-IN QUESTIONS Where did I show up for you this week or what do you appreciate about me as a partner? What feelings of hurt, frustration, or misunderstanding are left over from this week for you? What do you need me to hear or understand about them? How can I support you well as we go into a new week? What might you need from me? Can you tell me something you're proud of yourself for this week or share with me something you did well? Date night plans for this week? More Links: Follow Brad on Instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/bradjohnson.dbdl/ Visit Triad's website: https://triadpartners.com/the-movement/ Follow Triad on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/triadpartners/ Visit Brad's website and the DBDL podcast here: https://bradleyjohnson.com/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this heartfelt episode, discover the transformative power of "holding vigil" for your spouse through prayer and presence in a way that reallly costs, but also really gives, both to you and your spouse. Learn both general tips and how each Enneagram type uniquely supports their partner during difficult times and what challenges they face in staying present. Drawing from literary examples like Frodo and Sam, Atticus Finch and personal experiences, Christa explores how true empathy creates sacred space in marriage, and your faith journey, reflecting on Matthew 11:28. Perfect for couples seeking deeper connection through life's challenges. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Who can get in a sexy state of mind when they're dealing with the triple threat of emotional load, cognitive load, and the physical demands of partnership and parenting, too. Mental load inequity is now recognized as the leading source of relationship tension through research, but what can we do about that when not one but both partners feel equally burdened? In this enlightening conversation, we answer just that with relationship psychologist Dr. Morgan Cutlip (Type 9), as we explore the principles from her BRAND NEW book on a long-awaited topic, an already #1 Christian Marriage early marriage bestselling book "A Better Share: How Couples Can Tackle the Mental Load for More Fun, Less Resentment, and Great Sex." Drawing from her expertise in relationship psychology and her peacemaker perspective, Dr. Cutlip offers practical strategies for mental load sharing that honor each partner's strengths and abilities realistically. Discover why traditional approaches to division of labor often fail, how to recognize invisible contributions and specific communication tools that prevent resentment. Whether you're struggling with household management, parenting responsibilities, or emotional labor imbalance, this episode provides a framework for creating harmony without sacrificing anyone's well-being. Learn how a better share of responsibilities can lead not just to more equitable partnerships, but also to more fun, less resentment, and yes—even better sex. Watch on YouTube www.DrMorganCutlip.com If you're listening on our E + M podcast release date of Monday, April 7th, you can also use this to get the pre-order bonuses! https://drmorgancutlip.com/bs-preorder Get the new book, A Better Share: How Couples Can Tackle the Mental Load for More Fun, Less Resentment, and Great Sex here! https://a.co/d/g7e3qKv For more help discovering your relationship healing journey, visit www.EnneagramandMarriage.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

When your personality seems to straddle multiple Enneagram types, it can feel confusing or even invalidating. In this illuminating episode, we explore what it means when you identify strongly with two or more Enneagram patterns, referencing insights from Dr. Dan Siegel's previous conversation on the show. Discover why this "multi-type resonance" isn't a flaw in the system but potentially a more nuanced understanding of your personality structure. Learn practical approaches to growth when you're navigating multiple type patterns, how to discern which pattern might be tripping you up in specific situations, and how the Enneagram's Law of Three and Law of Seven provide a framework for understanding these complex dynamics. Whether you're a coach working with clients who don't fit neatly into one type or someone personally struggling to find your type home, this episode offers clarity, validation, and a path forward for your Enneagram journey. Watch on YouTube Here! For more help discovering your type, visit www.EnneagramandMarriage.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Is a clean house a spiritual obligation? In this liberating conversation, Dana K. White, author of the brand new book, "Jesus Doesn't Care About Your Messy House," challenges the shame and spiritual baggage many attach to home management. This book is for you, if no matter how competent you feel in other parts of your life, you still feel overwhelmed and defeated by your messy home. While it's true that keeping a clean and organized living space can contribute to a sense of peace and well-being, it should never be equated with your worth, moral standing, or what Jesus thinks about you.With her characteristic honesty and practical wisdom, Dana reveals how our homes often become measuring sticks for our spiritual worth—and why this connection is both damaging and unbiblical. Drawing on her own journey from drowning in clutter to finding sustainable systems, Dana shares insights particularly helpful for those with creative personalities who may get scattered as well as analytical, information-gathering tendencies similar to Enneagram Type 5 traits. Discover why "how you're made" is different from "just the way you are," how to create systems that work with your natural tendencies rather than against them, and why "technically helping" differs from "actually helping" your household. This conversation offers both practical home management strategies and spiritual freedom for anyone who has ever felt judged—by others or themselves—for the state of their home. Find Dana's book here: https://a.co/d/auuIYEI Find Dana on Instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/aslobcomesclean Find Dana's website here: https://www.aslobcomesclean.com/ Visit www.EnneagramandMarriage.com for more relationship resources! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices