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Season 6, Episode 750: When was the last time you talked about sex with your partner? In this episode, you will learn how to break the silence with tips and insights from relationship coach Monica Tanner. It's hard to talk about sex, our culture has made sure of that for us! And has done us ZERO favors in the process! Some truths from our chat include the following: the brain is your primary sexual organ (sexual satisfaction and intimacy depend more on mental engagement and psychological connection than physical mechanics), most people are unprepared for sexual communication (we are NOT taught or encouraged to do this), and self-pleasure is essential for partnered intimacy (we must LEARN about our bodies and pleasure pathways in order to communicate them to our partner). Come listen with an open mind, and leave with a plan to have better sex and intimacy with your partner! Guest Bio: Monica Tanner, Relational Life Therapy Certified, Relationship Coach and host of the Secrets of Happily Ever After podcast, transforms marriages with simple communication, connection, conflict resolution and commitment strategies. Her mission is to lower the divorce rate and improve marital satisfaction. Through her engaging podcast, new Amazon Best-Selling book, Bad Marriage Advice, vibrant social media community, and couple's coaching practice, Monica's expert guidance has impacted thousands of couples, by helping them ditch resentment and roommate syndrome and get back to living their happily ever after love story. Get the book Bad Marriage Advice (affiliate on Amazon): Bad Marriage Advice Book website: https://monicatanner.com Instagram: https://instagram.com/monitalksmarriage YouTube: https://youtube.com/@secretsofhappilyeverafter RUAN'S NEW BOOK RELEASE! Get PODCAST HOST Ruan Willow's new dark romance suspense thriller fiction novel "Beach House Views" for only $0.99 (for a limited time only) universal link https://mybook.to/beachhouseviews https://books.ruanwillowauthor.com/beachhouseviewsbook Support the show and get exclusive content Sign up for Ruan's Newsletters https://subscribepage.io/ruanwillow Get 10% OFF ENTIRE ORDER (min. purchase $69, no usage limits) with code RUANWILLOW10 on pleasure sex toys at https://www.kiiroo.com/ https://offers.feeliate.com/to92wTJh Affiliate link, collect your body's health and sexual health info with a wearable device for men from Firm Tech 15% OFF with code ruan15 https://myfirmtech.com/ruanwillow Copyright Pink Infinity Publishing 2026. All Rights Reserved.
Monica Tanner, RLT-trained Relationship Coach and host of the hit podcast Secrets of Happily Ever After, is on a mission to transform modern marriages and redefine lasting love. Through powerful yet practical strategies focused on communication, connection, conflict resolution, and commitment, Monica helps couples break free from resentment, rebuild intimacy, and escape "roommate syndrome." As the author of the Amazon Best-Selling book Bad Marriage Advice, Monica has inspired thousands of couples to reconnect, reignite passion, and create the love story they once dreamed of. Through her engaging podcast, thriving social media community, and transformational couples coaching, she empowers partners to stop surviving their marriage and start thriving in it. Her mission is simple but powerful: lower the divorce rate and help couples rediscover their happily ever after. https://www.badmarriageadvice.com/get-the-book #MarriageGoals #RelationshipAdvice #HealthyMarriage #CouplesGoals #MarriageCoach #LoveAndConnection #RelationshipHealing #MarriageMatters #HappilyEverAfter #CommunicationIsKey #SaveYourMarriage #LoveStronger #RelationshipExpert #ModernMarriage #CouplesTherapy #MarriagePodcast #RelationshipTips #ReconnectInLove #LoveWithoutLimits #ConflictResolution #EmotionalConnection #DatingAndMarriage #RelationshipGrowth #BetterTogether #MarriageHelp #LoveCoach #PodcastForCouples #RoommateSyndrome #MarriageTransformation #BadMarriageAdvice
In today's episode of Psych Talk I chat with Monica Tanner, relationship and intimacy coach, Certified Relational Life Therapy Practitioner, host of The Secrets of Happily Ever After Podcast, and author about harmful marriage advice and what to do instead. We start the discussion by Monica sharing her story of how she came into this field, as well as discussing her bookBad Marriage Advice: Debunking Myths That Will Make You Miserable and What To Do Instead. Monica shares some common harmful marriage myths and discusses how these myths negatively impact a couple's relationship and each individual's mental health. We discuss effective communication strategies that couples can implement to aid in their relationship, as well as mindset shifts couples can adopt for happier partnership. Monica also shares how couples can repair resentment and rebuild intimacy after a stressful period and how couples can model strong and healthy relationships for future generations.Information shared by guests on Psych Talk are reflective of their own values, perspectives, and life experiences. Psych Talk values platforming various perspectives and experiences even if those views are not necessarily reflective of Psych Talk's values and perspectives. Connect with Monica:Website: www.monicatanner.comPodcast: The Secrets of Happily Ever AfterBook: Bad Marriage AdviceIG: @monitalksmarriageConnect with Me:Follow me on IG @jessicaleighphdFollow the podcast on IG @psych.talk.podcastFollow me on TikTok @jessicaleighphdFollow me on Youtube Follow me on Threads @jessicaleighphdWelcome to Group Therapy PodcastWays to Work With Me:Mind Over MatterLGBTQ+ Affirming MasterclassBe a guest on my podcastResources:Anti-Racism ResourcesLGBTQ+ Affirming ResourcesThe Helping Professional's Guide to Boundary SettingIntro/Outro MusicLife of Riley by Kevin MacLeodMusic License
Monica is the author of the best selling book: Bad Marriage Advice She also hosts her own podcast: Secrets of Happily Ever AfterShe joins me for a great discussion about relationships, practical intimacy, and much more.
Struggling with mismatched libidos in your relationship? You're not alone—and the real problem isn't what you think.In this episode, I'm joined by relationship and intimacy coach Monica Tanner to unpack the hidden dynamics behind desire discrepancy. We dive into why couples get stuck in cycles of pressure and rejection, how small disappointments turn into long-term resentment, and what both partners may be doing (without realizing it) to keep the pattern going.If you've ever felt like:Your partner “should” want sex moreYou're constantly navigating pressure or rejectionEmotional connection isn't translating into a better sex life…this episode will help you understand why—and what to do differently.What You'll Learn:Why desire discrepancy is really a relationship dynamic (not just a libido issue)How “building a case” against your partner destroys intimacyThe hidden ways higher desire partners create pressureWhy emotional intimacy alone doesn't fix sexHow to expand your definition of sex and reduce pressureThe role of childhood conditioning in your sex lifeGuest Resources Mentioned:Monica Tanner's book: Bad Marriage AdviceMonica Tanner's website: https://www.monicatanner.com/❤️ Ready to improve your sex life?Take my free quiz to discover what's really blocking intimacy in your relationship:
Struggling with mismatched libidos in your relationship? You're not alone—and the real problem isn't what you think.In this episode, I'm joined by relationship and intimacy coach Monica Tanner to unpack the hidden dynamics behind desire discrepancy. We dive into why couples get stuck in cycles of pressure and rejection, how small disappointments turn into long-term resentment, and what both partners may be doing (without realizing it) to keep the pattern going.If you've ever felt like:Your partner “should” want sex moreYou're constantly navigating pressure or rejectionEmotional connection isn't translating into a better sex life…this episode will help you understand why—and what to do differently.What You'll Learn:Why desire discrepancy is really a relationship dynamic (not just a libido issue)How “building a case” against your partner destroys intimacyThe hidden ways higher desire partners create pressureWhy emotional intimacy alone doesn't fix sexHow to expand your definition of sex and reduce pressureThe role of childhood conditioning in your sex lifeGuest Resources Mentioned:Monica Tanner's book: Bad Marriage AdviceMonica Tanner's website: https://www.monicatanner.com/❤️ Ready to improve your sex life?Take my free quiz to discover what's really blocking intimacy in your relationship:
You've probably received the same relationship advice everyone gets. Never go to bed angry. Just communicate more. Send them the link. Some of it sounds reasonable and most of it gets misapplied in ways that create more problems than they solve. Monica Tanner is a Relational Life Therapy certified relationship coach, podcast host and author of the Amazon bestselling book Bad Marriage Advice, and she joins me to talk about what couples have been taught that isn't actually helping them, and what works instead.What this episode coversWhy never going to bed angry is one of the most misunderstood pieces of relationship advice and what it was actually meant to meanThe HALTS acronym and why timing matters more than most couples realise when trying to work through conflictMonica's thought download exercise: how to separate what's actually happened from the story you're telling yourself about itWhy an outsized reaction from your partner is almost never about what's happening right in front of youWhat Relational Life Therapy is and how the three phase approach works with couplesThe wise adult versus the adaptive child and what bringing yourself back online actually looks like in a heated momentWhy understanding your partner doesn't mean agreeing with themHow to share something you've learned with your partner without it turning into another argumentWhat to do when one partner is unhappy and the other thinks everything is fineMonica's through line: if advice dampens communication, it's bad adviceTimestamps0:00 Introduction1:00 How Bad Marriage Advice came about2:30 Never go to bed angry: what it actually means5:00 Monica's personal experience and what changed7:30 HALTS and responsible distance taking9:00 The thought download exercise12:00 Empathy for deeply ingrained beliefs 13:00 What Relational Life Therapy is15:30 How Monica and her husband navigate things now17:00 If it's hysterical it's historical18:00 Understanding does not equal agreement19:30 Being curious without being condescending20:00 Walking on eggshells and when to get help21:30 How to introduce this to your partner without it backfiring24:00 Sending 30 reels and what it really means27:00 When one partner wants to work on things and the other doesn't30:00 Why going to therapy alone can still shift a dynamicResources and LinksMonica Tanner's website: monicatanner.com Secrets of Happily Ever After podcast: monicatanner.com Bad Marriage Advice by Monica Tanner: available on Amazon Relationship Reset course: marievakakis.com.auKeep the Conversation GoingGot a question or something this episode stirred up? Send it through and it might become an Ask Marie episode: forms.gle/ExJAeBTXAfn8xGkQ9Instagram: @marievakakis Website: marievakakis.com.auMonica Tanner is a Relational Life Therapy certified relationship coach, podcast host of Secrets of Happily Ever After and author of Bad Marriage Advice. Find her at monicatanner.com.website: https://monicatanner.comInstagram: https://instagram.com/monitalksmarriageYoutube: https://youtube.com/@secretsofhappilyeverafter
Repair your relationship and become the masculine man you've always dreamed of being - complete this Relationship Integrity Audit for personalized guidance: https://theinspirationallifestyle.com/relationship-success-for-men-quiz/ Apply for a free 1:1 trial coaching session with Dan (spaces strictly limited): https://theinspirationallifestyle.com/lets-talk/ If you've ever felt like you're doing everything “right” in your relationship—being helpful, supportive, and always stepping in—yet things still feel distant, tense, or disconnected, this conversation will likely hit closer than expected. In this episode, we sit down with relationship coach and intimacy expert Monica Tanner to unpack a dynamic that quietly undermines many relationships: the difference between fixing and truly supporting. What looks like care on the surface can, over time, turn into control, emotional disconnection, and resentment—especially for people pleasers and “nice guys.” We explore how this pattern develops, why it often goes unnoticed, and how it impacts emotional safety, intimacy, and communication. From subtle resentment building beneath everyday interactions to the gradual loss of connection in long-term relationships, this conversation sheds light on what's really happening—and what can be done differently. If you've ever felt unappreciated, overwhelmed by your partner's emotions, or unsure why your relationship has shifted, this episode offers clarity, language, and a different way of approaching connection.
In this episode of The Stepmom Side Podcast, Alicia is joined by Monica Tanner to talk about how to reignite connection and intimacy in blended families, why stepfamily myths can damage marriages, and what couples can do to create a stronger, healthier relationship.They dive into one of the most controversial but important ideas in blended family life: why the couple relationship has to be the priority. Monica explains what that actually looks like in real life, how to support your partner without making it a competition with the kids, and why children benefit from seeing a healthy relationship modeled in the home.One of the most powerful parts of this episode is Monica's explanation of repair in relationships. She breaks down what repair means, how couples can come back together after conflict, and why healthy relationships are not conflict-free—they are built through harmony, disharmony, and repair.If you are a stepmom feeling disconnected in your marriage, exhausted by blended family stress, or unsure how to rebuild closeness with your partner, this episode will remind you that healthy relationships are built, not found.In this episode:How to rebuild connection and intimacy in blended familiesThe myth that kids should always come before the marriageWhat it means to make the relationship the priority without neglecting the childrenWhy stepfamily structure and united parenting matterConnect with Monica:www.monicatanner.comOn InstagramOn YouTubeSupport the showRegister here for StepmomCon Want a specific topic covered? Let me know here.After you listen to this, tag me on Instagram @aliciakrasko and let me know what you think!Get all the FREE RESOURCES here.Want to learn more about The Stepmom Side community? Here's where you get all the info. Looking forward to connecting with you on the inside.All things Alicia visit www.aliciakrasko.comGet on the list, get behind the scene info on Stepmom life, and tips delivered to your inbox.
If your relationship feels off but nothing is “wrong,” you're not alone. In this episode, Andryanna sits down with relationship coach Monica Tanner to explore why couples feel disconnected, how roommate syndrome shows up in modern relationships, and what it actually takes to reconnect in a realistic way.It's that subtle shift where a relationship looks “fine” on the surface; but connection feels distant, conversations feel functional, and both partners can end up feeling unseen in different ways.Drawing from her work in Relational Life Therapy and Sex Therapy, Monica shares a grounded, real-life perspective on why this happens, especially during busy seasons of life, and how couples can begin to understand and shift these patterns without adding more pressure. Together, they unpack the invisible dynamics that shape modern relationships and offer practical, realistic ways to move back toward connection and true partnership.In this episode:What “roommate syndrome” actually is and why so many couples experience it;Why relationships can feel disconnected even when there's love and effort;What's really happening underneath resentment; How mental load and daily life pressures show up inside a relationship;Why “just communicate” often doesn't work and what to do instead;The difference between compromise and true collaboration;What real teamwork looks like in a modern relationship;How small shifts in awareness can begin to rebuild connection.This episode offers a refreshing and honest take on relationships, not focused on perfection, but on understanding, awareness, and sustainable change.CONNECT WITH MONICA:MonicaTanner.comOn InstagramMonica's Book - Bad Marriage Advice: Debunking Myths That Will Make You Miserable and What To Do InsteadCONNECT WITH ANDRYANNA:Get your copy of The Juggle is Real: Authentic Self-Care Planner Vol. 2 HERE! On InstagramEmail: hello@andryanna.comAnd please visit Andryanna.com for blogs, giveaways, workshops, tools, resources and more.Keywords: roommate syndromefeeling disconnected in a relationshipwhy couples feel like roommatesemotional disconnection in marriagerelationship feels offmental load in relationshipsresentment in marriagehow to reconnect in a relationshipmarriage after kidsrelationship advice for busy momscollaboration vs compromiseteamwork in relationships
“You know my love language is physical touch, and yet you withhold sex, and that’s why I drink.” Relationship and Sex Therapist Monica Tanner joins Sheri and Matt to talk about ways The Five Love Languages are sometimes weaponized, and to dispell myths about our responsibility to make our partner’s feel loved. There are important lessons within the love languages about curiosity and communication, while at the same time, we remain responsible for getting out own needs met. Monica’s positivity radiates through this conversation, and is featured in her book, Bad Marriage Advice, and her podcast, Secrets of Happily Ever After. Please go to UntoxicatedSurvey.org to better understand the impact of alcohol and/or emotional abuse on you and your family. Whether you are the drinker or the partner, whether you feel a lack of emotional safety or don't really know what that means, we can help you feel supported. Take the survey. You've got this, and we've got you.
YouSex and relationship coach Monica Tanner called in to talk about three popular marriage myths that don't actually work and why, tune in to hear all the details including the top three pieces of marriage advice that don't work and why including compromise, happy wife happy life and don't sweat the small stuff, how and why collaboration works way better than compromise, why happy wife happy life doesn't actually lead to a happy marriage, how ignoring the small stuff leads to bigger blowups later on and why you need to address things early, how and why communication is key and why so many couples struggle with it, why emotional connection and sexual connection are two totally separate things and why fixing one doesn't automatically fix the other, why sex goes out the window in most long term relationships and why for some couples it doesn't, why you have to be intentional about your sex life and not expect it to just happen, how to properly make requests from your partner instead of complaining, what men get wrong when it comes to getting women in the mood, how and why it's super important to understand what your partner thinks about sex and define what sex actually means to each of you plus a whole lot more. YOu can find all her stuff here: https://www.monicatanner.com GET A COPY OF THE STRICTLY ANONYMOUS BOOK! Strictly Anonymous Confessions: Secret Sex Lives of Total Strangers. A bunch of short, super sexy, TRUE stories. GET YOUR COPY HERE: https://amzn.to/4i7hBCd To see HOT pics of my female guests + hear anonymous confessions + get all the episodes early and AD FREE, join my Patreon! It's only $7 a month and you can cancel at any time. You can sign up here: https://www.patreon.com/StrictlyAnonymousPodcast and when you join, I'll throw in a complimentary link to my private Discord! To join SDC and get a FREE Trial! click here: https://www.sdc.com/?ref=37712 or go to SDC.com and use my code 37712 Want to be on the show? Email me at strictlyanonymouspodcast@gmail.com or go to http://www.strictlyanonymouspodcast.com and click on "Be on the Show." Want to confess while remaining anonymous? Call the CONFESSIONS hotline at 347-420-3579. All voices are changed. Sponsors: https://beducate.me/pd2614-anonymous — Click here to take the quiz and get your personalized roadmap to sexual happiness https://Vb.Health — To get 10% off DRIVE BOOST by VB Health use code: STRICTLY https://bluechew.com — Get 10% OFF your first month of Bluechew GOLD! Use code: STRICTLYANON https://www.quince.com/strictlyanon — For premium quality Quince clothing plus FREE shipping and 365 day returns! Follow me! Instagram https://www.instagram.com/strictanonymous/ X https://twitter.com/strictanonymous?lang=en Website http://www.strictlyanonymouspodcast.com/ Everything else: https://linktr.ee/Strictlyanonymouspodcast Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Most relationship problems don't come from one big moment.They build over time.In episode 244 of The Alcohol ReThink Podcast, I'm joined by couples and marriage therapist Monica Tanner to explore what actually shapes the quality of our relationships, not the big arguments, but the small, everyday things that often go unnoticed. We talk about unspoken expectations, broken commitments, and how the way you show up day to day impacts your partner, your family, and yourself.A big part of this conversation is honesty.Being honest about your behaviour.Being honest about what you need.And being willing to have conversations that most people avoid.We also get into the role alcohol can play.Not as the only issue, but as something that can lower your standards, affect your decisions, and lead to breaking promises to yourself, which then impacts trust in your relationships. Monica shares practical ways to communicate more effectively, including how to make clear, respectful requests instead of criticising or blaming. We also challenge common relationship clichés and look at why they can create imbalance and resentment over time.We finish by exploring how to handle difficult situations in relationships, especially when change isn't happening, and how to make decisions you can genuinely stand behind.If you want to understand your relationship better and start showing up differently, this episode will give you a clear place to start.Work with Patrick:Discover how coaching can support your goals in rethinking alcohol.
We grow up believing in “happily ever after," but what happens when real relationships don’t look like the movies? Morgan is joined by relationship coach Monica Tanner to talk about the gap between expectation and reality and how to build something even better. We get into why love alone isn’t enough, the resentment that quietly builds over time, learning to ask for what you actually need, why conflict can strengthen your relationship, and choosing your partner, even when it’s hard. If you’ve ever questioned your relationship, felt misunderstood, or wanted deeper connection, this episode will change how you see it all.
We grow up believing in “happily ever after," but what happens when real relationships don’t look like the movies? Morgan is joined by relationship coach Monica Tanner to talk about the gap between expectation and reality and how to build something even better. We get into why love alone isn’t enough, the resentment that quietly builds over time, learning to ask for what you actually need, why conflict can strengthen your relationship, and choosing your partner, even when it’s hard. If you’ve ever questioned your relationship, felt misunderstood, or wanted deeper connection, this episode will change how you see it all.
There is a lot of marriage advice that sounds good on the surface but can actually create bigger problems for couples over time. In this episode, I'm joined by relationship coach and author Monica Tanner to break down some of the most common advice couples hear and why it often backfires.We talk about advice like “never go to bed angry” and “happy wife, happy life,” and Monica shares why these messages can lead to more frustration in relationships. Tune in to learn what couples can do instead to build stronger communication and a more supportive partnership.Tune in to discover:• Why “never go to bed angry” can make conflict harder to resolve• The problem with the “happy wife, happy life” mindset• Why small issues matter more than couples think• A simple framework for making clear, productive requests• How appreciation can improve communication in marriageConnect with Monica:• Bad Marriage Advice Book: https://www.badmarriageadvice.com/get-the-book• Website: https://www.monicatanner.com/• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/monitalksmarriage• Secrets of Happily Ever After Podcast: https://www.monicatanner.com/contenthubConnect with Lindsay:• FREE 30 Min Call: https://marriedafterkids.satoriapp.com/offers/277730-married-after-kids-intervention-call• The Us System: https://marriedafterkids.com/the-us-system• Marriage Shutdown Checklist: https://marriedafterkids.com/marriage-shutdown?utm_source=podcast&utm_medium=links&utm_campaign=MSoptin• The 3 Secrets to a Happier Marriage [Free Training]: https://marriedafterkids.com/3-secrets?utm_source=Podcast&utm_medium=Links&utm_campaign=3%20Secrets%20-%20Jan26• Instagram: www.instagram.com/marriedafterkids
I'm getting real about the desire gap today with relationship coach Monica Tanner—and trust me, we go there.
Send a textBad Marriage Advice BookSecrets of Happily Ever After with Monica Tanner PodcastPMDD Pyramid Private SessionsMe Before PMDD: Relationship Reset Toolkit-CouplesClick to Book a Private PMDD SessionFollow me on InstagramFollow me on TikTokPMDD doesn't just change moods, it can change the entire rhythm of a relationship. When the luteal phase hits, couples often slide into the same argument pattern, then spend the “good weeks” trying to forget it ever happened. We wanted something more useful than replaying the past, so we brought in Monica Tanner, a couples coach who helps partners spot the pattern, name it, and choose a different step.We get practical about luteal phase communication, including why both partners are part of the dynamic and how unmet needs quietly turn into avoidance, bitterness, and distance. Monica explains how couples can build awareness of their “dance,” share what they're capable of during different cycle phases, and negotiate real solutions that protect connection without forcing either person to pretend they feel fine.Then we go straight into intimacy. Monica breaks down three pillars for a healthier sex life: emotional safety, understanding spontaneous versus responsive desire, and bringing back playful energy when things feel heavy or “roommate-like.” We also talk about widening the menu so intimacy isn't limited to one definition of sex, and how simple check-ins can reduce insecurity and spiraling after a sexual moment.If you're navigating a PMDD relationship, dating with PMDD, or trying to rebuild closeness after a long dry spell, this one is packed with tools you can use immediately. Subscribe, share this with a partner or friend who needs it, and leave a review to help more couples find support. What part of the monthly “dance” do you want to change first?
Send a textMost couples don't fall out of love dramatically. They just slowly stop paying attention to each other — until one day they look up and realize they're running a household with a stranger.In this episode, Alex and Amanda sit down with marriage coach Monica Tanner to talk about why the advice you've been given — don't sweat the small stuff, compromise, just let it go — might actually be accelerating the drift. Monica introduces the idea of skillful communication over lazy communication, explains why there's always a desire underneath every complaint, and walks through her relational reckoning tool for couples who aren't sure if there's still enough to save.They also get into roommate syndrome, how to talk about sex without it becoming a battleground, the difference between compromise and collaboration, and why getting what you asked for from your partner can sometimes feel worse than not getting it at all.Disclaimer: The views and opinions expressed by our podcast guest are their own and do not necessarily reflect the views of the hosts or the podcast. We value diverse perspectives and aim to provide a platform for thoughtful discussion and exploration of different ideas.Got any comments, suggestions or queries? We'd love to hear from you! DM us on Instagram @dirty.laundry.podcast to be featured on one of our upcoming episodes. Also, don't forget to rate and review our show on your favourite podcast player.
Mentioned in the episode:Dr. Stephanie's- Shop Dr. Stephanie's Here Code- GOLDIVY30 for 30% off at checkoutAll Things Elderberry- www.allthingselderberry.com Code- GOLDIVY at checkout for 15% off your first orderRelievance- Relievance Daily Fiber Supplement on Amazon: Relievance on AmazonSmidge- All Supplements and Products | Smidge® Code- GOLDIVY10 for a 10% discount at checkoutGuest: Monica TannerInstagram: Monica Tanner I Marriage Coach I Speaker (@monitalksmarriage) • Instagram photos and videosWebsite: Secrets of Happily Ever AfterIs the marriage advice you've been following actually setting you up for failure? In this episode, we sit down with relationship expert Monica Tanner to debunk the "holy grail" clichés—like "Never go to bed angry" and "Happy wife, happy life"—that might be doing more harm than good in your partnership.We're diving deep into the difference between simply compromising and truly collaborating, and why healthy conflict is actually a catalyst for a stronger bond. If you've ever felt like you're losing your identity in your relationship or struggling to find a balance of power, this episode is your roadmap back to an authentic connection.In this episode, we cover:The Trap of Traditional Advice: Why taking advice from anyone just because they've been married longer can be a mistakeMyth Busting: Why "Never Go to Bed Angry" is often bad advice and what to do insteadIdentity & Connection: How to maintain your own standards and interests while fully joining your partner's lifeThe Power of Rituals: One daily ritual that protects your individuality and supports mutual growthProductive Conflict: How to move from settling for a compromise to building a "win-win" through collaborationStop settling for clichés and start building a beautiful partnership.*Additionally, we want to remind you that this podcast is presented solely for educational and entertainment purposes. We are not licensed therapists, and this podcast is not intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professional.*Find Andrea & Brooke as @goldivyhealthco on Instagram: Brooke Herbert | Andrea Herbert (@goldivyhealthco) • Instagram photos and videos#relationshipadvice #relationshiptips #strongmarriage #marriagetips Support the show
In this powerful episode of What Are You Made Of?, host Mike "C-Roc" sits down with relationship coach Monica Tanner for an honest, insightful, and surprisingly fun conversation about what really makes a marriage last. Monica, an RLT-trained coach and host of the Secrets of Happily Ever After, shares how her parents' divorce at age 12 shaped her life's mission: lowering the divorce rate and helping couples move from resentment and “roommate syndrome” back to real connection.With vulnerability and humor, Monica opens up about her own abandonment fears, anxious attachment patterns, and the years of intentional trust-building that strengthened her 23-year marriage. She and Mike "C-Roc" dive into the realities of communication differences between men and women, why “don't sweat the small stuff” might actually be terrible advice, and how unspoken frustrations about things as small as toilet paper rolls and light switches can quietly erode intimacy over time.Monica also unpacks insights from her Amazon best-selling book, Bad Marriage Advice, challenging common myths that keep couples stuck in cycles of resentment. Instead of avoiding conflict, she explains why skillfully addressing small issues early creates safety, respect, and deeper emotional connection. From overcoming insecurity and jealousy to building secure attachment and lasting trust, this episode is packed with practical strategies couples can apply immediately.If you've ever wondered whether “happily ever after” is still possible in the real world, Monica Tanner makes a compelling case that it absolutely is—but only when couples choose intentional communication, commitment, and compassion.ebsite-https://monicatanner.com Social Media Links/Handles:https://www.instagram.com/monitalksmarriagehttps://www.youtube.com/@secretsofhappilyeverafter
In this episode, Mike welcomes relationship coach and author of the book "Bad Marriage Advice," Monica Tanner. Some of the topics discussed include:-The myths around marriage that still persist-The secret habits of couples who thrive, not just survive-From DMs to “I Do” How to build authentic connection in a digital world-When intimacy fizzles: What actually works to reignite passionContact Monica:www.monicatanner.comContact Mike:Mike Sinopoli - NASM Certified Personal Trainer & Nutrition CoachInstagram, Facebook, X, LinkedIn: @mfswellness email: mike@mfswellness.comphone: 630-361-4907www.mfswellness.com
In this week's episode of The Raw Vibe, I sit down with relationship coach and author Monica Tanner, whose book Bad Marriage Advice challenges the myths and misunderstandings that often lead couples astray. Together, we dive deep into what makes healthy relationships thrive — from honest communication and sexual health to intimacy and emotional alignment.Monica shares powerful insights on how couples can create a safe space to express desires, set boundaries, and address small issues before they grow into bigger problems. Whether you're newly married or decades into your relationship, this conversation will give you practical tools to strengthen your connection, negotiate differences with respect, and rediscover fulfillment in and out of the bedroom.Key Takeaways:Communication is the foundation of every healthy relationship.Sex talks aren't taboo — they're necessary and ongoing.Boundaries build trust, not barriers.Values alignment keeps couples connected.Small improvements today prevent major conflicts tomorrow.Tune in now and learn how to turn good intentions into lasting intimacy.Visit The Raw Vibe for more empowering conversations, connect with Monica Tanner at monicatanner.com, and read a sample of Bad Marriage Advice here. https://amzn.to/3OzWr5C00:00 The Importance of Communication in Relationships02:43 Navigating Sexual Intimacy in Marriage05:38 Breaking the Ice: Discussing Difficult Topics08:56 Setting Boundaries in New Relationships11:50 Understanding Values in Relationships14:55 Bad Marriage Advice: What to Avoid17:51 Creating a Healthy Relationship Dynamic20:47 The Role of Religion and Values in Relationships23:40 Conclusion and Final Thoughts
Happy Belated Valentine's Day. I hope you all enjoyed it, especially those who were able to share it with someone else. If you're in a relationship, no matter how good it is, there is one thing that must not be ignored. We should never forget the importance of Self-Love. Now I'm not talking about being conceited or narcissism. The relationship you have with yourself is the most important one that you'll ever have. On today's episode, Tony Wechsler and Monica Tanner are going to discuss "The Importance of Self Love in Relationships." Monica is the author of the book, "Bad Marriage Advice: Debunking Myths That Will Make You Miserable and What To Do Instead" You can find it on Amazon or get your copy here: https://www.badmarriageadvice.com/join-the-waitlistFeel free to reach out to Monica or check out her website: https://www.monicatanner.com/And her podcast: https://www.monicatanner.com/contenthubAs always, you are invited to join the Strive to Thrive Facebook group for a supportive community.... https://www.facebook.com/groups/strivetothrivepage BTW...If you love this episode, please take a screenshot, share it on your Facebook story and tag me @TonyWechsler And remember to download the eBook, Strive to Thrive at https://tonywcoaching.com/
What's the worst and best relationship advice you've ever heard? My podcast guest, Monica Tanner, shares her relationship advice as a Relationship Coach and host of the Secrets of Happily Ever After podcast. She transforms marriages with simple communication, connection, conflict resolution and commitment strategies. Her mission is to lower the divorce rate and improve marital satisfaction. Through her engaging podcast, new Amazon Best-Selling book, Bad Marriage Advice, vibrant social media community, and couple's coaching practice, Monica's expert guidance has impacted thousands of couples, by helping them ditch resentment and roommate syndrome and get back to living their happily ever after love story.In this episode:The worst relationship adviceThe top 3 secrets to happily ever afterThe cure for “Roommate Syndrome” Connect With MonicaWebsites https://monicatanner.com , https://badmarriageadvice.com IG https://instagram.com/monitalksmarriage YouTube https://youtube.com/@secretsofhappilyeverafter Free Gift 300+ Date Night Ideas for Every Season and Budget https://monicatanner.com/300dates ►Please subscribe/rate and review the podcast on Apple Podcasts http://bit.ly/lastfirstdateradio ►If you're feeling stuck in dating and relationships and would like to find your last first date, sign up for a complimentary 45-minute breakthrough session with Sandy https://lastfirstdate.com/application ►Join Your Last First Date on Facebook https://facebook.com/groups/yourlastfirstdate ►Get Sandy's books, Becoming a Woman of Value; How to Thrive in Life and Love https://bit.ly/womanofvaluebook , Choice Points in Dating https://amzn.to/3jTFQe9 and Love at Last https://amzn.to/4erpj7C ►Get FREE coaching on the podcast! https://bit.ly/LFDradiocoaching ►FREE download: “Top 10 Reasons Why Men Suddenly Pull Away” http://bit.ly/whymendisappear ►FREE download: “The Green Light Guide to Dating After 50” https://lastfirstdate.com/green-light-guide/ ►Group Coaching: https://lastfirstdate.com/the-woman-of-value-club/ ►Website → https://lastfirstdate.com/ ► Instagram → https://www.instagram.com/lastfirstdate1/ ►Get Amazon Music Unlimited FREE for 30 days at https://getamazonmusic.com/lastfirstdate
On this episode of The Manic Candice Podcast, I sit down with Monica Tanner, author of the Amazon bestseller Bad Marriage Advice, to talk about marriage myths, the pressure to find a partner, and the real skills healthy relationships require. We dive into communication, emotional growth, and what you can start doing now to improve your love life—whether you're single, dating, or married. A must-listen for anyone who wants better relationships without the BS.https://linkbio.co/ManicCandicehttps://www.monicatanner.com/https://www.amazon.com/Bad-Marriage-Advice-Debunking-Miserable/dp/B0FQ46HG3S
Author, podcaster, and relationship coach, Monica Tanner joins Dating Daze to talk about the "bad advice" that can lead to relationship troubles. Old adages that can cause troubles like: Never go to bed angry Happy wife, happy life Don't sweat the small stuff If you really loved each other, you'd just know what the other needs The right person will never hurt you These and more can lead to issues and resentment. Other topics like: How to deal with different "style" of texting and text replies (one is fine not texting for days and one wants much faster and frequent responses. Find all of Monica Tanners Resources that can help you at: MonicaTanner.com
This episode of #mensexpleasure features marriage, relationship, and intimacy coach Monica Tanner, who shares her background, including her parents' divorce at 12, 23 years of marriage, and her work helping couples build connection and intimacy while aiming to reduce divorce. We discuss common marriage breakdown areas—communication, sex, money, and parenting—and how sex issues can feel larger when overall connection is weak, particularly for men who often experience closeness through physical intimacy.Key points:02:16 Why Marriages Fail12:49 Debunking Marriage Cliches18:16 Collaboration Over Compromise24:13 Modern Gender Roles29:19 Three Step Request Method39:01 Repair Is One Way Street45:16 Eight Sentence Repair Script
Are you tired of hearing the same old marriage advice? ("Happy wife, happy life," "Learn to compromise")? Maybe what the experts tell you leaves you feeling frustrated, disconnected, and battling resentment. In this game-changing episode, we host Monica Tanner, Relationship Coach, host of the Secrets of Happily Ever After podcast, and Amazon Best-Selling author of Bad Marriage Advice: 15 myths that will make you miserable. Monica is here to teach you how to stop settling and start building your marriage on holy ground. She tackles the single biggest mindset trap couples fall into and shares simple yet effective strategies to ditch resentment and build up your marriage on holy ground. In this episode, we explore:
Let's Think About "Marriage Advice" With Special Guest Monica Tanner Monica shares her thoughts on marriage advice, reminding people to establish a foundation that unites. While learning about Monica, we discussed her book and the good and bad marriage advice it provided. This episode aims to prompt thought. To stay in touch, please visit Monica's website at https://www.monicatanner.com/ to learn more about her.
Marriage – or any long-term romantic relationship – can be one of life's most joyful partnerships. Yet, sometimes, what was once a promising union can become more like a roommate situation or worse. If you're in a romantic relationship that's gone (or is going) a bit south, today's episode promises a wealth of actionable relationship and intimacy tips to help you and your romantic life thrive. Join Dr. Carla Manly and relationship expert Monica Tanner for an uplifting journey into discovering the key elements of healthy, genuine love. Topics discussed include marriage, relationships, compromise, collaboration, advice, intimacy, roommate syndrome, resentment, disconnection, anger, true love, and emotional intelligence.Please note that this episode may contain sensitive material; listener discretion is advised.Emergency Assistance Note: If you or someone you know needs immediate support, please call your emergency services. In the US, 24/7 help is available by calling “911” or “988” (Suicide and Crisis Hotline). Support/informational links are in the show notes.IMPORTANT DISCLAIMER: No expert in this (or any episode) is offering medical or psychological direction; the content is purely informational in nature. Please consult your physician or healthcare provider before undertaking any new regimen or procedure.https://www.nami.org/support-education/nami-helpline/Connect with Dr. Carla Manly:Website: https://www.drcarlamanly.comInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/drcarlamanly/Twitter: https://www.twitter.com/drcarlamanly/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/drcarlamanlyLinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/carla-marie-manly-8682362b/YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@dr.carlamariemanly8543TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@dr_carla_manlyBooks by Dr. Carla Manly:Joy From Fear: Create the Life of Your Dreams by Making Fear Your Friend Date Smart: Transform Your Relationships and Love FearlesslyAging Joyfully: A Woman's Guide to Optimal Health, Relationships, and Fulfillment for Her 50s and BeyondThe Joy of Imperfect Love: The Art of Creating Healthy, Securely Attached RelationshipsOracle decks by Dr. Carla Manly:EtsyAmazonConnect with Monica Tanner:Website: https://badmarriageadvice.com, https://monicatanner.comInstagram: https://instagram.com/monitalksmarriageYouTube: https://youtube.com/@secretsofhappilyeverafterLove the show? Subscribe, rate, review, and share! https://drcarlamanly.com/
Monica Tanner, founder of Secrets of Happily Ever After, a relationship and intimacy coaching practice that helps high-powered married couples ditch resentment and reignite connection in their love stories.Through one-on-one coaching, three-day intensives, and her signature frameworks, Monica empowers couples to move from scorekeeping to soulmates by building real communication and conflict resolution skills.Now, Monica's journey from struggling with bad marriage advice to becoming a certified RLT expert shows how transforming your own relationship can inspire a business that changes lives.And while shifting her focus to younger couples who want to start strong, she's rewriting the rules of marriage with honesty, heart, and hope.Here's where to find more:Website: https://monicatanner.comBook website: https://badmarriageadvice.comInstagram: https://instagram.com/monitanner1YouTube: https://youtube.com/@secretsofhappilyeverafterLinkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/monicatannerFacebook: https://facebook.com/monica.tanner2________________________________________________Welcome to The Unforget Yourself Show where we use the power of woo and the proof of science to help you identify your blind spots, and get over your own bullshit so that you can do the fucking thing you ACTUALLY want to do!We're Mark and Katie, the founders of Unforget Yourself and the creators of the Unforget Yourself System and on this podcast, we're here to share REAL conversations about what goes on inside the heart and minds of those brave and crazy enough to start their own business. From the accidental entrepreneur to the laser-focused CEO, we find out how they got to where they are today, not by hearing the go-to story of their success, but talking about how we all have our own BS to deal with and it's through facing ourselves that we find a way to do the fucking thing.Along the way, we hope to show you that YOU are the most important asset in your business (and your life - duh!). Being a business owner is tough! With vulnerability and humor, we get to the real story behind their success and show you that you're not alone._____________________Find all our links to all the things like the socials, how to work with us and how to apply to be on the podcast here: https://linktr.ee/unforgetyourself
Have you ever noticed that whenever we're going through a difficult situation in life, there's never a shortage of really bad advice. This is especially true when it comes to relationships and marriage. Everyone wants to tell us what we should do, but even when they have our best interests in mind, we need to really be mindful of what they are saying. On today's episode, Tony Wechsler and Monica Tanner are going to talk about “Really Bad Marriage Advice.” Monica is the author of the book, "Bad Marriage Advice: Debunking Myths That Will Make You Miserable and What To Do Instead" You can find it on Amazon or get your copy here: https://www.badmarriageadvice.com/join-the-waitlistFeel free to reach out to Monica or check out her website: https://www.monicatanner.com/And her podcast: https://www.monicatanner.com/contenthubAs always, you are invited to join the Strive to ThriveFacebook group for a supportive community.... https://www.facebook.com/groups/strivetothrivepage BTW...If you love this episode, please take a screenshot, share it on your Facebook story and tag me @TonyWechsler And remember to download the eBook, Strive to Thrive at https://tonywcoaching.com/
❌ Ever heard “happy wife, happy life”? Or “just learn to compromise”? Monica Tanner—author of Bad Marriage Advice—joins Adam and Karissa to turn some of the most common marriage clichés upside down. Did you know that compromise can actually breed resentment? This episode will make you rethink the way you communicate with your spouse. Could some of the advice you've believed for years actually be hurting your marriage? Tune in to find out!
In our last episode, we sat down with Monica Tanner to explore the bad marriage advice many of us have been given, advice that can quietly undermine even the strongest relationships. This week, Nick and Amy dive deeper into the topic in The Ultimate Intimacy Podcast, sharing more examples of the misguided guidance that couples often hear and the real impact it can have on a marriage.Tune in as Nick and Amy break down the myths, the mistakes, and the bad advice we've all encountered, so you can build a stronger, more authentic connection with your spouse.If you haven't already, go check out the Ultimate Intimacy App in the app stores, or at ultimateintimacy.com to find "Ultimate Intimacy" in your marriage. It's FREE to download and so much fun! Find out why close to 1M people have downloaded the app and give it such high ratings and reviews!Check out the new UandI App we just released after a year in development.WANT AMAZING PRODUCTS TO SPICE THINGS UP? YES PLEASE... CLICK HEREFollow us on Instagram @ultimateintimacyapp for app updates, polls, giveaways, daily marriage quotes and more.If you have any feedback, comments or topics you would like to hear on future episodes, reach out to us at amy@ultimateintimacy.com and let us know! We greatly appreciate your feedback and please leave us a review.Enjoy the podcast or have some feedback for us? Shoot us a message!
In this episode of the Ultimate Intimacy Podcast, we dive deep into the often overlooked and sometimes misguided world of marriage advice with Monica Tanner, the brilliant mind behind the eye-opening new book, Bad Marriage Advice. Monica pulls back the curtain on the most common pieces of advice we've all heard, and sometimes blindly followed, and she explains why these “tips” could actually be hurting your marriage.We explore the advice we think is helpful but is secretly harmful, the myths that keep couples stuck in cycles of frustration, and the surprising truths that can transform how you connect with your spouse. Monica's insights are honest, practical, and even funny, making this episode as enlightening as it is entertaining.Whether you're newly married, decades in, or just curious about what really makes relationships thrive, this episode is packed with revelations that could change the way you think, communicate, and love. Tune in and discover whether some of the things you've been doing to “improve” your marriage might actually be making it worse—and what to do instead.If you haven't already, go check out the Ultimate Intimacy App in the app stores, or at ultimateintimacy.com to find "Ultimate Intimacy" in your marriage. It's FREE to download and so much fun! Find out why close to 1M people have downloaded the app and give it such high ratings and reviews!Check out the new UandI App we just released after a year in development.WANT AMAZING PRODUCTS TO SPICE THINGS UP? YES PLEASE... CLICK HEREFollow us on Instagram @ultimateintimacyapp for app updates, polls, giveaways, daily marriage quotes and more.If you have any feedback, comments or topics you would like to hear on future episodes, reach out to us at amy@ultimateintimacy.com and let us know! We greatly appreciate your feedback and please leave us a review.Enjoy the podcast or have some feedback for us? Shoot us a message!
Relationships feel easy when things are going well—when we feel understood and everything between us feels steady. They're much harder when we're frustrated, disappointed, or misunderstood. Yet it's in those moments of friction and honest conflict that we're invited to grow—to become wiser, more grounded, and more capable of real love. In this NEW episode, Dr. Finlayson-Fife joins Monica Tanner to share insights from That We Might Have Joy and explore how conflict in marriage isn't a sign that something's gone wrong, but part of the very process through which deeper intimacy and peace take shape.
Have you every received bad marriage advice? We sure have! In today's episode, I'm joined by my friend and returning guest, Monica Tanner. She recently released her book Bad Marriage Advice, and together we unpack some of the most common (and harmful) myths about marriage and sex and what the real advice should be. If you've ever wondered whether the “wisdom” you heard before your wedding day was worth following—or if you're trying to sort through conflicting advice about sex and intimacy—this episode is for you.
In today's episode, I sit down with relationship expert Monica Tanner, who shares her expertise on navigating the delicate balance between love and business. We talk about the real challenges couples face when both their personal and professional lives intertwine. Monica has helped countless couples, particularly those who are also business partners. Drawing on her 23 years of marriage and extensive coaching experience, Monica explains why communication breakdowns often occur and how couples can rebuild trust and connection. If you're in a relationship, especially a business partnership, this episode will give you tools to keep the love alive, from understanding your "adaptive child" to mastering repair conversations. Listen now and start making positive changes! "In a healthy, thriving relationship, both partners have to feel comfortable sharing their thoughts, opinions, and wounds." ~ Monica Tanner In This Episode: - The number one thing that ruins relationships - Understanding the role of the adaptive child - How to talk to your adaptive child - Effective repair conversations - The four parts of a repair conversation - Balancing work and marriage - Decision-making and compromise when in conflict - Navigating modern dating and non-negotiables in marriage - Monica's 'Bad Marriage Advice' book Resources Mentioned In The Episode: Grab Monica's new book, Bad Marriage Advice: https://badmarriageadvice.com Listen to The Secrets of Happily Ever After podcast: https://secretsofhappilyeverafter.buzzsprout.com About Monica Tanner: Monica Tanner, RLT trained, Relationship Coach and host of the Secrets of Happily Ever After podcast, transforms marriages with simple communication, connection, conflict resolution, and commitment strategies. Her mission is to lower the divorce rate and improve marital satisfaction. Through her new book, Bad Marriage Advice, her engaging podcast, vibrant social media community, and couples' coaching practice, Monica's expert guidance has impacted thousands of couples by helping them ditch resentment and roommate syndrome and get back to living their happily ever after love story. Website:https://www.monicatanner.com/ Instagram: https://instagram.com/monitalksmarriage YouTube: https://youtube.com/@secretsofhappilyeverafter Where to find me: IG: https://www.instagram.com/jen_gottlieb/ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@jen_gottlieb Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/Jenleahgottlieb Website: https://jengottlieb.com/ My business: https://www.superconnectormedia.com/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@jen_gottlieb
Relationship coach Monica Tanner returns to discuss her new book "Bad Marriage Advice: 15 Myths That Are Keeping You Miserable" and challenges conventional wisdom that may be damaging marriages. She explores how common advice like "happy wife, happy life" and "don't sweat the small stuff" creates imbalanced relationships, poor communication patterns, and prevents couples from addressing issues before they become serious problems.• "Happy wife, happy life" places too much responsibility on women for the emotional atmosphere while encouraging men to silence their own needs• "Divorce is not an option" can prevent couples from growing and making necessary changes when they believe they're stuck regardless of effort• Instead of compromise where nobody gets what they want, try collaboration through curiosity about each other's underlying needs• Newlyweds should establish a relationship with a coach/counselor early as prevention rather than waiting for crisis• "Don't sweat the small stuff" ignores how minor irritations become major resentments—address issues while they're still small• Most relationship patterns stem from childhood programming and past experiences that shape automatic reactions• The key to stronger marriages is consciousness (understanding yourself and your partner) and effective communication• Happily ever after is possible when couples view marriage as a "people-growing machine" that helps them become their best selvesFind Monica Tanner's book at badmarriageadvice.com or learn more about her work at monicatanner.com.Two Awesome PeopleNew Episodes Every Monday and Thursday!Listen on: Apple Podcasts SpotifyVisit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways: Strongermarriage.org Podcast.stongermarriage.org YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@StrongerMarriageLife TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@strongermarriagelife Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/strongermarriagelife/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/strongermarriage/ Facebook Marriage Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/770019130329579 Dr. Dave Schramm: http://drdaveschramm.com http://drdavespeaks.com Dr. Liz Hale: http://www.drlizhale.com/
Let us know how you enjoyed this episode!Bad marriage advice is everywhere—and following it could be quietly sabotaging your relationship.In this episode of The Marriage & Motherhood Podcast, I'm joined by fellow relationship coach Monica Tanner to debunk some of the most common (and harmful) pieces of advice couples are told. From the well-meaning but destructive “Never go to bed angry” to the seemingly logical “Compromise is the key to happiness,” we unpack why these ideas don't actually work—and what to do instead.We also explore:How not addressing issues at night can actually help your marriageWhy compromise often leads to resentment instead of connectionWhat healthy collaboration and curiosity look like in real-life marriagesThe hidden ways moms, especially, abandon themselves in the name of being “good wives” or “good mothers”How Monica's new book helps couples break free from myths that keep them stuckIf you've ever felt like you were doing everything “right” but still weren't happy in your marriage, this conversation will open your eyes to what's really going on—and how to change it.Connect with Monica:Website: www.monicatanner.comIG: @monitalksmarriageGrab her new book here!Thanks for listening!If you're ready to break the cycles you've noticed in your marriage, reach out by booking a clarity call to become a client! https://michellepurta.as.me/clarityConnect and send a message letting me know what you took away from this episode: @michellepurtacoaching and follow me on threads @michellepurtacoaching!If you would like to support this show, please rate and review the show, and share it with people you know would love this show too!Additional Resources:Ready to put a stop to the arguments in your marriage? Watch this free masterclass - The #1 Conversation Married Couples Need To Have (But Aren't)Want to handle conflict with more confidence? Download this free workbook!Wanna make communication feel easy and stop feeling like roommates so you can bring back the romance and excitement into your marriage? Learn more about how coaching here!
Are marriage myths quietly sabotaging your relationship? In this episode of the Intimate Marriage Podcast, Dr. Alexandra Stockwell sits down with returning guest Monica Tanner to challenge the most common (and misleading) advice couples are told. From "happy wife, happy life" to "compromise is key," they unpack why these popular sayings fall short—and what to do instead. If you're ready to trade clichés for true connection, this conversation is for you. Episode highlights: Why "happy wife, happy life" doesn't lead to a wonderful marriage The power of collaboration over compromise in solving relationship challenges How choosing your partner daily leads to growth and deeper connection The role of honest communication in breaking free from unhelpful marriage advice How being intentional and understanding each other's needs creates lasting fulfillment About The Guest: Monica Tanner, RLT trained, Relationship Coach and host of the Secrets of Happily Ever After podcast, transforms marriages with simple communication, connection, conflict resolution and commitment strategies. Her mission is to lower the divorce rate and improve marital satisfaction. Through her engaging podcast, new book, Bad Marriage Advice, vibrant social media community, and couple's coaching practice, Monica's expert guidance has impacted thousands of couples, by helping them ditch resentment and roommate syndrome and get back to living their happily ever after love story. https://monicatanner.com https://badmarriageadvice.com https://www.instagram.com/monitalksmarriage/ https://youtube.com/@secretsofhappilyeverafter Subscribe To The Intimate Marriage Podcast: Apple Podcast | YouTube | Spotify Connect With Alexandra Stockwell, MD: Website | Linkedin | Instagram Get your copy of "Uncompromising Intimacy" by Dr. Alexandra Stockwell here: https://amzn.to/2ymI3Hl Download the first chapter of Dr Alexandra's bestselling book, "Uncompromising Intimacy," here: https://www.alexandrastockwell.com/book Cultivate your intimacy skills (without compromise) in Aligned & Hot Marriage, Dr. Alexandra's proven method for smart couples ready to love more fully: www.alignedhotmarriage.com Join Dr. Alexandra's email list to stay connected. She shares inspiring stories, her latest insights and opportunities to learn with her: https://www.alexandrastockwell.com/subscribe This Podcast Is Produced, Engineered & Edited By: Simplified Impact
Are marriage myths quietly sabotaging your relationship? In this episode of the Intimate Marriage Podcast, Dr. Alexandra Stockwell sits down with returning guest Monica Tanner to challenge the most common (and misleading) advice couples are told. From “happy wife, happy life” to “compromise is key,” they unpack why these popular sayings fall short—and what to do instead. If you're ready to trade clichés for true connection, this conversation is for you. Episode highlights: Why “happy wife, happy life” doesn't lead to a wonderful marriage The power of collaboration over compromise in solving relationship challenges How choosing your partner daily leads to growth and deeper connection The role of honest communication in breaking free from unhelpful marriage advice How being intentional and understanding each other's needs creates lasting fulfillment About The Guest: Monica Tanner, RLT trained, Relationship Coach and host of the Secrets of Happily Ever After podcast, transforms marriages with simple communication, connection, conflict resolution and commitment strategies. Her mission is to lower the divorce rate and improve marital satisfaction. Through her engaging podcast, new book, Bad Marriage Advice, vibrant social media community, and couple's coaching practice, Monica's expert guidance has impacted thousands of couples, by helping them ditch resentment and roommate syndrome and get back to living their happily ever after love story. https://monicatanner.com https://badmarriageadvice.com https://www.instagram.com/monitalksmarriage/ https://youtube.com/@secretsofhappilyeverafter Subscribe To The Intimate Marriage Podcast: Apple Podcast | YouTube | Spotify Connect With Alexandra Stockwell, MD: Website | Linkedin | Instagram Get your copy of “Uncompromising Intimacy” by Dr. Alexandra Stockwell here: https://amzn.to/2ymI3Hl Download the first chapter of Dr Alexandra's bestselling book, “Uncompromising Intimacy,” here: https://www.alexandrastockwell.com/book Cultivate your intimacy skills (without compromise) in Aligned & Hot Marriage, Dr. Alexandra's proven method for smart couples ready to love more fully: www.alignedhotmarriage.com Join Dr. Alexandra's email list to stay connected. She shares inspiring stories, her latest insights and opportunities to learn with her: https://www.alexandrastockwell.com/subscribe This Podcast Is Produced, Engineered & Edited By: Simplified Impact
Is the marriage advice you've heard actually helping or quietly hurting your relationship? In this episode, Amanda interviews marriage coach and author Monica Tanner about her new book Bad Marriage Advice. They dive into common myths like “never go to bed angry” and “happy wife, happy life,” and explain why these well-meaning tips can lead to disconnection over time. You'll hear real stories, modern insight, and practical ways to build a relationship rooted in choice, not obligation. Whether you're newlywed or decades in, this conversation is full of wisdom you won't want to miss. You can find Monica at: Her website: https://www.monicatanner.com/ Get on the waitlist for her book: https://www.badmarriageadvice.com/join-the-waitlist
Co-Host Monica Tanner (https://mountaintoppodcast.com/monica) My first-time guest Monica Tanner is a relationship coach from Boise, Idaho and the author of a book called Bad Marriage Advice. Now, even though that seems like a pretty rough topic that's no fun at all, Monica has a way of making it fun to talk about. That means you can look forward to one of the most entertaining episodes in a while. First off, what's up with all of that 'well meaning' relationship advice we get from friends and especially family members, but which is just really awful, if not downright dangerous? Is 'happy wife, happy life' really a thing? And what about when we as men joke about how the wife is 'the boss'? Should it be an option to say 'divorce is not an option'? It's not like we should just glibly drop the 'd bomb' in a relationship, right? Is a relationship really 'hard work'? What makes your relationship with a woman either less or more difficult? Is there a proper 'time to get married', or is that a trap as well? Should couples compromise? What is the deal with watching movies together...it's always a battle to find a flick both of you want to watch, right? Should you really just go read a book in another room while she watches some chick flick? And what's up with actual recommendations out there to blatantly enter into transactional relationships? What about 'not sweating the small stuff' in a relationship? Is it actually healthy for couples to fight? And finally...stay tuned for the massive toilet paper debate (after all, that's what's really important here). Have you checked out the new Substack at https://mountaintoppodcast.com/substack === HELP US SEND THE MESSAGE TO GREAT MEN EVERYWHERE === The show is now available as a VIDEO version on YouTube. For some reason, the episodes seem funnier...if a bit more rough around the edges. If you love what you hear, please rate the show on the service you subscribed to it on (takes one second) and leave a review. As we say here in Texas, I appreciate you!
Zach sits down with Monica Tanner—coach, podcast host, and author of Bad Marriage Advice—and her husband Ben, a self-proclaimed private “civilian.” Together, they share how their 23-year marriage has evolved from survival mode to a deeply intentional partnership. The conversation moves from parenting young adults to debunking cliché marriage advice like “don't go to bed angry” and “happy wife, happy life.” Monica opens up about abandonment wounds, anxiety, and the healing that came through personal work and communication. Ben offers a grounded perspective on emotional processing, individual growth, and learning how to show up with humility and humor. Whether you're the fixer or the withdrawer in conflict, this episode offers insight into how couples can grow together by getting curious, staying patient, and prioritizing mutual respect. Key Takeaways Bad marriage advice lingers—until you replace it with something better Monica and Ben describe how the phrase “don't go to bed angry” caused years of unnecessary distress until they found a compassionate workaround that honored both their needs. Self-work strengthens the marriage Ben emphasizes how personal growth—working on his patience and emotional regulation—helped him become a better partner. Conflict patterns are rooted in the past Monica shares how her abandonment trauma shaped her reactions in marriage, and how learning to identify and express her emotions helped them both grow. Intentionality transformed their relationship A moment of debilitating anxiety marked a turning point for Monica, leading her to redefine how she showed up in her family and marriage. Fun, friendship, and physical activity keep them connected From daily walks to travel adventures, Monica and Ben prioritize shared time, conversation, and experiences as cornerstones of their relationship. Guest Info Monica Tanner Relationship coach, podcast host, and author of the upcoming book Bad Marriage Advice. https://www.monicatanner.com/ Ben Tanner Entrepreneur. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Zach sits down with Monica Tanner—coach, podcast host, and author of Bad Marriage Advice—and her husband Ben, a self-proclaimed private “civilian.” Together, they share how their 23-year marriage has evolved from survival mode to a deeply intentional partnership. The conversation moves from parenting young adults to debunking cliché marriage advice like “don't go to bed angry” and “happy wife, happy life.” Monica opens up about abandonment wounds, anxiety, and the healing that came through personal work and communication. Ben offers a grounded perspective on emotional processing, individual growth, and learning how to show up with humility and humor. Whether you're the fixer or the withdrawer in conflict, this episode offers insight into how couples can grow together by getting curious, staying patient, and prioritizing mutual respect. Key Takeaways Bad marriage advice lingers—until you replace it with something better Monica and Ben describe how the phrase “don't go to bed angry” caused years of unnecessary distress until they found a compassionate workaround that honored both their needs. Self-work strengthens the marriage Ben emphasizes how personal growth—working on his patience and emotional regulation—helped him become a better partner. Conflict patterns are rooted in the past Monica shares how her abandonment trauma shaped her reactions in marriage, and how learning to identify and express her emotions helped them both grow. Intentionality transformed their relationship A moment of debilitating anxiety marked a turning point for Monica, leading her to redefine how she showed up in her family and marriage. Fun, friendship, and physical activity keep them connected From daily walks to travel adventures, Monica and Ben prioritize shared time, conversation, and experiences as cornerstones of their relationship. Guest Info Monica Tanner Relationship coach, podcast host, and author of the upcoming book Bad Marriage Advice. https://www.monicatanner.com/ Ben Tanner Entrepreneur. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoicesSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
Monica Tanner is an RLT-trained relationship coach and host of the "Secrets of Happily Ever After" podcast. She transforms marriages with simple communication, connection, conflict resolution, and commitment strategies. Her mission is to lower the divorce rate and improve marital satisfaction. Through her podcast, social media community, couple's coaching practice, and new book—Bad Marriage Advice, Monica has helped thousands of couples ditch resentment and roommate syndrome and get back to living their happily-ever-after love story. In the Church, Monica serves in the Young Women program with two of her daughters. Links MonicaTanner.com Bad Marriage Advice Share your thoughts in the Leading Saints community Transcript coming soon Get 14-day access to the Core Leader Library Highlights Monica shares insights on the importance of communication in marriage, noting that many couples express a need for help in this area. They discuss the dynamics of relationships, emphasizing that both partners must actively engage in the marriage to foster a healthy connection. The episode also touches on the stigma surrounding seeking help for marital issues within the Latter-day Saint community, where some may feel that divorce is not an option, leading to feelings of entrapment. Monica explores common misconceptions about marriage, such as the idea that "happy couples never fight." They argue that conflict is a natural part of any relationship and that learning to navigate disagreements is crucial for growth. The discussion also addresses the problematic advice of "never go to bed angry," suggesting that sometimes it is healthier to take a break and revisit issues with a fresh perspective. Throughout the episode, the importance of choice in marriage is emphasized. Monica encourages couples to view their relationship as a partnership where both individuals actively choose to be together, rather than feeling obligated due to covenants or societal expectations. They advocate for open communication and the necessity of seeking help when needed, highlighting that doing so is a sign of strength and commitment. 00:03:19 - Common Marriage Struggles Monica discusses the prevalent issues couples face, particularly around communication and faith transitions. 00:04:54 - The Empty Nest Phenomenon Exploration of the challenges couples face when their children leave home, leading to potential relationship reevaluation. 00:06:27 - Advice for Struggling Couples Monica offers guidance for couples who feel tension in their marriage but may not have the resources for therapy. 00:08:34 - Unique Aspects of Latter-day Saint Marriages Discussion on the stigma around seeking help for marriage issues within the Latter-day Saint culture. 00:10:55 - The Concept of Choice in Marriage Exploration of how the perception of being "locked in" to a marriage can affect relationship dynamics. 00:12:22 - Agency and Choice in Relationships Monica emphasizes the importance of making daily choices in marriage and the role of agency in relationships. 00:14:27 - The Importance of Communication Discussion on the necessity of open communication in marriage and the dangers of complacency. 00:16:12 - Navigating Divorce Conversations Insights on how church leaders can approach discussions about divorce and the importance of not feeling trapped. 00:18:10 - Infidelity and Marriage Recovery Monica shares perspectives on how infidelity can sometimes lead to positive changes in a marriage. 00:20:22 - The Role of Church Leaders Advice for church leaders on how to support couples in distress without overstepping their boundaries. 00:22:25 - Community Support in Marriage The importance of community support and sharing experiences to help couples feel less isolated. 00:24:35 - The Reality of Marriage Dynamics Discussion on the complexities of marriage and the need for both partners to actively engage in the relationship.
For years, I believed all the wrong things about love.I thought if I just followed the rules, we'd be happy forever. But real connection? It doesn't come from clichés, it comes from skills.I've helped thousands of couples move from stuck... The post Bad Marriage Advice – Monica Tanner – 949 appeared first on The Cultural Hall Podcast.
Relationship coach and Secrets of Happily Ever After podcast host Monica Tanner joins me to talk about the marriage myths we've been sold—and why so much common advice is actually making relationships worse.We'll unpack the real reasons couples drift into resentment and “roommate syndrome,” and how to rebuild connection through Monica's simple but powerful framework.From better communication to practical ways to handle conflict and commitment, this conversation is full of takeaways you can start using today—whether your marriage needs a total overhaul or just a little tune-up.Plus, we'll explore how taking care of yourself can be the best thing you do for your relationship.Monica Tanner, RLT trained, Relationship Coach and host of the Secrets of Happily Ever After podcast, transforms marriages with simple communication, connection, conflict resolution and commitment strategies. Her mission is to lower the divorce rate and improve marital satisfaction. Through her engaging podcast, new book, Bad Marriage Advice, vibrant social media community, and couple's coaching practice, Monica's expert guidance has impacted thousands of couples, by helping them ditch resentment and roommate syndrome and get back to living their happily ever after love story.www.monicatanner.com, www.badmarriageadvice.comwww.instagram.com/monitanner1
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