Stronger Marriage Connection

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It's often said that marriage takes work. The Stronger Marriage Connection podcast wants to help because a happy marriage is worth the effort. USU Family Life Professor Dr. Dave Schramm and Clinical Psychologist Dr. Liz Hale talk with experts about the principles and practices that will enhance your commitment, compassion, and emotional connection.  More than ever before, marriages face obstacles, from the busyness of work and daily hassles to disagreements and digital distractions. It's no wonder couples sometimes drift apart, growing resentful, lonely, and isolated. The Utah Marriage Commission invites you to listen and discover new ways to strengthen and protect your marriage connection today!

KSL Podcasts


    • Jun 2, 2025 LATEST EPISODE
    • weekly NEW EPISODES
    • 42m AVG DURATION
    • 137 EPISODES

    Ivy Insights

    The Stronger Marriage Connection podcast is an incredible resource for anyone looking to strengthen their relationship and improve their marriage. As a listener, I have found this podcast to be positive, hopeful, and filled with valuable information. Whether I'm working out or just taking some time to relax and listen, this show never fails to provide me with insights, advice, and different perspectives on marriage. I highly recommend it to everyone.

    One of the best aspects of The Stronger Marriage Connection podcast is the variety of topics that are covered. From communication skills to intimacy, from resolving conflicts to building a strong foundation, this podcast touches on all aspects of a successful marriage. It offers practical tips and strategies that can be applied in real life. Additionally, the guest speakers bring diverse expertise and experiences, making each episode unique and engaging. The episodes are easy to listen to and the hosts present ideas in a positive and relatable way.

    While it's difficult to find any negative aspects of this podcast, one potential drawback could be the length of the episodes. Some listeners may prefer shorter episodes that are more concise and straight to the point. However, it's important to note that the longer format allows for a deeper exploration of topics and provides ample time for in-depth discussions with guests.

    In conclusion, The Stronger Marriage Connection podcast is an invaluable resource for anyone looking to improve their relationship or strengthen their marriage. With its positive outlook, practical advice, and diverse range of topics, this podcast offers something for everyone. Whether you're starting from scratch or already have a solid foundation in your marriage, this show will provide you with new insights and tools to enhance your relationship. I am immensely grateful for this podcast and eagerly look forward to each new episode.



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    Latest episodes from Stronger Marriage Connection

    Keeping Marriage Strong When Life Gets Tough | Dave and Julie Bulitt | #135

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 2, 2025 45:12 Transcription Available


    Visit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways: Strongermarriage.org Podcast.stongermarriage.org Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/strongermarriage/ Facebook Marriage Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/770019130329579 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/strongermarriagelife/ Dr. Dave Schramm: http://drdaveschramm.com http://drdavespeaks.com Dr. Liz Hale: http://www.drlizhale.com

    Your Baby Deserves Parents Who Love Each Other | Julie Blackburn | #134

    Play Episode Listen Later May 26, 2025 43:17 Transcription Available


    Julie Blackburn shares her expertise on helping couples maintain strong relationships during the challenging transition to parenthood, drawing on her experience as a registered nurse, midwife, and Bringing Baby Home educator.• 67% of couples become unhappy with each other during the first three years of their baby's life• The greatest gift you can give your baby is a happy and strong relationship between parents• Parenting differences stem from our upbringing and personal experiences• The "secret sauce" for healthy relationships includes maintaining friendship, regulating conflict, and creating shared meaning• Criticism can cause partners (especially dads) to withdraw from parenting involvement• When dad is unhappy in his relationship with mom, a gulf often grows between him and his child• Father involvement is crucial for child development, affecting temperament, self-regulation, confidence, and academic performance• Military families face unique challenges requiring extra intentionality in maintaining connection• The Gottman card deck app offers structured ways to maintain meaningful conversations and express needs without criticism• Keeping an emotional "bank account" full through expressions of fondness and admiration sustains relationships through challengesThe key to a stronger marriage connection is friendship and kindness. Remember to remain each other's best friend, hold space for each other, and keep telling your partner how much you appreciate them.Recharge with David KoChats with Kevin Bacon, Chelsea Handler, Jordan Chiles, Common and Sheryl Lee RalphListen on: Apple Podcasts SpotifyVisit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways: Strongermarriage.org Podcast.stongermarriage.org Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/strongermarriage/ Facebook Marriage Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/770019130329579 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/strongermarriagelife/ Dr. Dave Schramm: http://drdaveschramm.com http://drdavespeaks.com Dr. Liz Hale: http://www.drlizhale.com

    A Great Marriage Starts With a Great You | Greg Denning | #133

    Play Episode Listen Later May 19, 2025 46:26 Transcription Available


    Greg Denning shares his journey from a troubled childhood to creating an extraordinary marriage and family life while traveling to over 60 countries with his wife and seven children. His positive energy and unique ability to inspire others stems from his personal transformation after leaving home at 16 and experiencing homelessness before discovering the secrets to creating a happy life.• Making marriage the true priority by saying no to anything that competes with the relationship• Using micro deposits (daily acts of connection) and macro deposits (regular getaways and annual honeymoon trips) to invest in marriage• Applying the "Silent Film Test" – asking if observers would know your spouse is your priority based only on actions• Working on yourself first – resolving personal issues that create obstacles in your marriage• Understanding that men can increase their capacity to handle pressure through mindset shifts and physical health• Learning to truly listen to your spouse without trying to fix or respond• Strategically creating systems that enable you to manage complex family life without burnout• Remembering the marriage equation: as you improve yourself, the relationship improves even if only one partner is initially working on itWe live at the level of our habits, not our hopes. Don't settle for a mediocre marriage – keep pursuing your dream of a phenomenal relationship through consistent small adjustments that create big differences over time.You can completely turn around your Happiness level and overall Success in 7 to 11 weeksAs a Quantum Healer, Coach and Consciousness Educator, Sara empowers empath women...Listen on: Apple Podcasts SpotifyVisit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways: Strongermarriage.org Podcast.stongermarriage.org Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/strongermarriage/ Facebook Marriage Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/770019130329579 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/strongermarriagelife/ Dr. Dave Schramm: http://drdaveschramm.com http://drdavespeaks.com Dr. Liz Hale: http://www.drlizhale.com

    Gottman's Science of Love: Practical Tools for Connection | Julie Sharon-Wagschal | #132

    Play Episode Listen Later May 12, 2025 42:09 Transcription Available


    Struggling to understand what makes a relationship flourish over time? In this eye-opening episode with Dutch-American psychologist Julie Sharon, we uncover the science-backed secrets that separate thriving marriages from those that falter.When couples find themselves locked in the same frustrating conflict patterns, the answer might be surprisingly physiological. Julie reveals how a racing heart (over 100 BPM) signals we've entered "fight or flight" mode—a state where productive communication becomes nearly impossible. Learn why taking a structured 20-30 minute break can transform heated arguments into constructive conversations, and why agreeing to return to difficult topics builds crucial trust.The episode dives deep into the Gottmans' groundbreaking research on "bids for connection"—those small moments when we reach toward our partner for acknowledgment or engagement. Julie explains why couples who respond positively to these bids 86% of the time stay happily married, while those responding only 33% of the time face relationship breakdown. These seemingly minor interactions create what she calls an "emotional bank account" that buffers relationships during inevitable conflicts.Beyond the research, Julie shares practical tools you can implement today: the stress-reducing conversation (listening without solving), effective repair attempts after conflicts, and creating a culture of appreciation and kindness. She emphasizes that healthy relationships aren't conflict-free—they simply maintain a 5:1 ratio of positive to negative interactions during disagreements.Ready to transform your relationship? Start by looking inward at your own contributions rather than focusing on your partner's shortcomings. As Julie reminds us: "Slow down, take a look inside. Don't respond too quickly. Think before you act, think before you speak, feel before you speak."Visit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways: Strongermarriage.org Podcast.stongermarriage.org Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/strongermarriage/ Facebook Marriage Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/770019130329579 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/strongermarriagelife/ Dr. Dave Schramm: http://drdaveschramm.com http://drdavespeaks.com Dr. Liz Hale: http://www.drlizhale.com

    Navigating Relationship Conflict: Healing Through Connection | Dr. Ryan Seedall | #131

    Play Episode Listen Later May 5, 2025 49:22 Transcription Available


    Dr. Ryan Seedall draws on his 20+ years of experience as a therapist to share insights about relationship conflict patterns and the role of attachment in marriage dynamics. He provides practical pointers to strengthen marriage connections, including how to navigate the demand-withdraw cycle and use anger productively.• Healthy marriages require not just absence of negative interactions but presence of positive ones• Couples need to recover from conflict, not just learn how to argue better• The demand-withdraw pattern creates a cycle where one person's behavior triggers the exact response they're trying to avoid• "Signal and respond" describes how partners communicate needs and respond to each other• Anger serves as a protest signal that something needs attention, not necessarily a destructive force• Technology creates new challenges for couples, with text arguments losing crucial nonverbal cues• Mixed-faith marriages require special navigation of differing beliefs and values• Early intervention is crucial - addressing small issues before they become entrenched patterns• Attunement to partner's emotional state builds trust and connection• Vulnerability, when met with responsiveness, creates deeper intimacyRemember, it's the small things that create a stronger marriage connection. Find more resources at StrongerMarriage.org, including workshops, e-courses, webinars and relationship surveys.Recharge with David Ko, CEO of CalmRecharge is a limited series premiering in May to honor Mental Health Awareness Month. Listen on: Apple Podcasts SpotifyVisit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways: Strongermarriage.org Podcast.stongermarriage.org Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/strongermarriage/ Facebook Marriage Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/770019130329579 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/strongermarriagelife/ Dr. Dave Schramm: http://drdaveschramm.com http://drdavespeaks.com Dr. Liz Hale: http://www.drlizhale.com

    The Imago Connection: Transforming Conflict into Growth | Mary Kay Cocharo | #130

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 28, 2025 51:09 Transcription Available


    Mary Kay Cuccaro shares how Imago therapy helps transform relationship conflicts into opportunities for healing childhood wounds through a structured dialogue process that fosters safety, understanding, and deep connection. • Imago theory suggests we're unconsciously attracted to partners who possess both positive and negative traits of our childhood caretakers• Relationships typically move from a romantic stage (lasting about two years) to a power struggle phase where childhood wounds emerge• 50% of married couples divorce during the power struggle phase after about six years of conflict• The Intentional Dialogue process involves mirroring (reflecting what was said), validating (acknowledging the other's perspective makes sense), and empathizing• Surface conflicts often mask deeper childhood wounds, as illustrated by a couple fighting about a dog that actually connected to grief over a mother's death• Sitting 18 inches apart with eye contact calms the limbic brain and activates the cortex, creating a neurobiological state conducive to problem-solving• People typically respond to conflict by either "hyper-arousing" (getting louder/more expressive) or "hypo-arousing" (withdrawing/shutting down)• Three key elements for a stronger marriage connection: touch/physical affection, safe/respectful communication, and shared activities• Focus on the dynamic in the space between you rather than blaming your partner• Simple eye gazing for a few minutes can rebuild connection when words have become triggeringVisit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways: Strongermarriage.org Podcast.stongermarriage.org Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/strongermarriage/ Facebook Marriage Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/770019130329579 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/strongermarriagelife/ Dr. Dave Schramm: http://drdaveschramm.com http://drdavespeaks.com Dr. Liz Hale: http://www.drlizhale.com

    Technology Meets Therapy: How Digital Tools Are Transforming Modern Relationships | Brian Doss | #129

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 21, 2025 37:31 Transcription Available


    Dr. Brian Doss shares a science-backed digital resource called Our Relationship that helps couples identify relationship challenges and implement effective solutions through a structured framework.• Our Relationship program has been continuously funded by the NIH for 15 years and helped tens of thousands of couples• The DEEP framework helps couples understand Differences, Emotions, External stress, and Patterns of communication• Surface emotions like anger often mask hidden emotions like hurt, loneliness, or feeling disconnected• "Invisible support" like doing household tasks before your partner notices can significantly reduce relationship stress• Expressing gratitude for small actions helps maintain positive connections with your partner• The program takes approximately 8-10 hours and offers optional coaching support• Free versions are available for military families and qualifying households based on income• Research shows the program improves not just relationships but also mental health, physical health, and family functioningVisit OurRelationship.com to learn more about the program, which is available both online and through app stores.Visit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways: Strongermarriage.org Podcast.stongermarriage.org Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/strongermarriage/ Facebook Marriage Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/770019130329579 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/strongermarriagelife/ Dr. Dave Schramm: http://drdaveschramm.com http://drdavespeaks.com Dr. Liz Hale: http://www.drlizhale.com

    Relationship Churning: The On-Again, Off-Again Cycle | Sarah Halpren-Meekin | #128

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 14, 2025 31:53 Transcription Available


    Relationship churning—the pattern of breaking up and getting back together with the same partner—affects nearly half of young adults and creates emotional whiplash for couples, children, and their support networks. Dr. Sarah Halpern-Meekin shares her groundbreaking research on this common relationship phenomenon, explaining why couples fall into these patterns and what it means for their wellbeing.• Relationship churning comes in two main forms: breaking up and getting back together, and having sex with an ex• Nearly half of young adults report churning in their current or most recent relationship• Churning relationships show higher psychological distress, lower satisfaction, and worse communication, but surprisingly higher intimate self-disclosure• Fathers in churning relationships stay more involved with their children than those who permanently break up• Economic distress, incarceration history, and one-sided breakups increase likelihood of churning• The key to healthy relationships includes investing time in connection, developing conflict management skills, and setting clear expectations• Before reconciling after a breakup, ask if what caused the original breakup has actually changedVisit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways: Strongermarriage.org Podcast.stongermarriage.org Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/strongermarriage/ Facebook Marriage Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/770019130329579 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/strongermarriagelife/ Dr. Dave Schramm: http://drdaveschramm.com http://drdavespeaks.com Dr. Liz Hale: http://www.drlizhale.com

    Connection: The Core of Human Experience | Adam Dorsay | #127

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 7, 2025 52:44 Transcription Available


    Connection forms the foundation of mental health and happiness, with disconnection from ourselves, others, the world, and something greater underlying virtually every psychological struggle we face.• Four types of connection: with self (authenticity), others (relationships), the world (nature/art), and something greater (awe/spirituality)• Modern distractions like social media, FOMO, and constant digital interruptions actively prevent meaningful connection• Self-connection provides the foundation for all other connections - if disconnected from ourselves, we can't truly connect elsewhere• Personal "connection formulas" vary widely - activities that energize one person may drain another• Novel shared experiences allow families and couples to see each other through fresh eyes and strengthen bonds• Friendships serve vital roles that romantic relationships cannot replace - no single relationship can meet all our connection needs• Workplace connection can be found by developing valued skills and experiencing flow states even in less-than-ideal jobs• Loneliness impacts physical health more than smoking, highlighting connection as a fundamental human needThe book "Super Psyched: Unleash the Power of the Four Types of Connection and Live the Life You Love" is available now on Amazon and Barnes & Noble, and you can learn more at DrAdamDorsay.com.Visit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways: Strongermarriage.org Podcast.stongermarriage.org Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/strongermarriage/ Facebook Marriage Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/770019130329579 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/strongermarriagelife/ Dr. Dave Schramm: http://drdaveschramm.com http://drdavespeaks.com Dr. Liz Hale: http://www.drlizhale.com

    Betrayal Trauma: Finding Hope After Infidelity | Dave Jones | #126

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 31, 2025 36:42 Transcription Available


    Betrayal trauma occurs when trust is violated within a relationship, creating a profound alteration of reality for the betrayed partner and causing symptoms similar to PTSD. David Jones, a licensed marriage and family therapist, shares insights on the unique challenges of betrayal trauma and offers a three-part framework for healing.• Betrayal trauma is defined as an "alteration of reality" - discovering that what you thought was true about your relationship wasn't• What makes betrayal trauma unique is that the betrayed often must interact with the source of their trauma• The "three legs of the stool" framework for healing: boundaries, individual coping skills/self-care, and connections• Recovery takes significant time - often years - but healing is possible whether the relationship continues or ends• Forgiveness does not equal trust - forgiveness is releasing bitterness while trust must be earned through consistent behavior• Emotional safety forms the foundation for rebuilding connection after betrayal• Support people should be "marriage friendly" if the couple is working toward reconciliationIf you'd like to learn more about the resources discussed in this episode, visit Secure Connection Counseling at secureconnectioncounseling.com or explore the resources available at StrongerMarriage.org.David's Links:https://secureconnectioncounseling.com/About David Jones:David Jones is dedicated to strengthening marriages and families. Growing up with divorced parents and a father in recovery from alcoholism shaped his passion for helping couples navigate challenges. His own blended family of eight children further fuels his commitment to marriage therapy.A Certified Emotionally Focused Therapist, Certified Family Life Educator, and EFT Supervisor Candidate, David specializes in helping couples facing betrayal trauma, infidelity, sexual addiction, and ADHD-related relationship struggles. He also teaches university courses on family relationships and serves as an Army Reserve Chaplain, expanding his real-world perspective.As an AAMFT-Approved Supervisor and EFT Supervisor in Training, David is a leader in his field. He applies attachment theory to therapy, believing that secure relationships not only heal but create lasting transformation. Clients often credit his work with saving their marriages. With a deep well of experience, empathy, and expertise, David is a trusted guide for couples seeking healing and growth.Visit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways: Strongermarriage.org Podcast.stongermarriage.org Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/strongermarriage/ Facebook Marriage Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/770019130329579 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/strongermarriagelife/ Dr. Dave Schramm: http://drdaveschramm.com http://drdavespeaks.com Dr. Liz Hale: http://www.drlizhale.com

    When Marriage Meets Faith | Dr. Loren Marks | #125

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 24, 2025 55:28 Transcription Available


    Faith and religion shape marriages by influencing beliefs, practices, and community connections that help couples build "championship marriages" through shared sacred purpose. Dr. Loren Marks shares insights from the American Families of Faith Project, featuring interviews with 300 exemplary couples from 20+ faith traditions.• Shared beliefs create a "family vision" that transcends daily conflicts and provides meaning• Religious practices like family prayer, Shabbat dinners, and observing Ramadan strengthen marital bonds• Faith communities offer support, mentorship, and "friends of the marriage" who invest in couples' success• Even spouses from identical religious backgrounds have different spiritual experiences—every marriage is an "interfaith marriage"• The "divine triangle" concept shows how spouses on individual spiritual journeys converge as they move toward God• Big C Commitment (commitment "no matter what") versus little c commitment (conditional commitment) makes the difference in lasting marriages• Great marriages weren't always great—many couples shared they would have "jumped ship" without faith helping them through early struggles• Religion can harm marriages when it becomes a "time affair" or when applied too rigidly without relational flexibilityMarriage is an invitation to increased holiness, where "you lift me and I'll lift thee, and together we will ascend."Visit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways: Strongermarriage.org Podcast.stongermarriage.org Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/strongermarriage/ Facebook Marriage Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/770019130329579 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/strongermarriagelife/ Dr. Dave Schramm: http://drdaveschramm.com http://drdavespeaks.com Dr. Liz Hale: http://www.drlizhale.com

    Hidden Toll: How Conflict & Divorce Impact Children | Jenet Erickson | #124

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 17, 2025 44:35 Transcription Available


    Dr. Liz and Dr. Dave welcome Dr. Janet Erickson to discuss the profound impact of marriage on children and families, exploring how parental relationships shape child development and identity formation.• Strong marriages create a sense of wholeness, identity, and belonging for children• Research consistently shows divorce has significant impacts on children of all ages• Children of divorce often face existential questions about their identity and place• Adult children of divorce can overcome challenges by witnessing healthy marriage models• A "good enough" marriage is worth fighting for, though abusive relationships warrant separation• Marriage involves a journey from "loving without knowing" to "being seen, known, and loved"• Maintaining family rituals provides stability during transitions• Personal growth and self-awareness are crucial for healthy relationships• Happiness ultimately comes from deep connection with others"We are relational beings and relationships are worth it, and this is the essence of life. Happiness is love full stop, and our ability to love and to be in loving relationships is worth the growth. It will take growth. It's going to take change in all of us, but that's what we're born for. It's what we desire more than anything."Visit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways: Strongermarriage.org Podcast.stongermarriage.org Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/strongermarriage/ Facebook Marriage Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/770019130329579 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/strongermarriagelife/ Dr. Dave Schramm: http://drdaveschramm.com http://drdavespeaks.com Dr. Liz Hale: http://www.drlizhale.com

    The Art of New Parenthood: Protecting Your Relationship While Welcoming Baby | Joni Parthemer | #123

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 10, 2025 42:48 Transcription Available


    Dr. Liz and Dr. Dave welcome Joni Parthimer, education director for the Gottman Institute's Bringing Baby Home program, to discuss how couples can maintain a strong relationship while navigating the challenges of new parenthood.• Research shows 67% of couples experience a significant drop in relationship satisfaction after becoming parents• Three key ingredients for relationship success: maintaining friendship, respectful conflict regulation, and creating shared family meaning• The NURSE framework helps new parents prioritize self-care: Nutrition, Understanding support needs, Rest/Resources, Soul-feeding activities, and Exercise• CPR parenting (Consistent, Predictable, Responsive) builds emotional security for infants• Babies communicate through non-verbal cues and states of consciousness from birth• Understanding infant development helps parents respond appropriately to their needs• Grandparents play an evolving role and should ask what support looks like for each family• Creating a postpartum plan before baby arrives helps the transition for everyone involved• The greatest gift parents can give children is a healthy relationship between themselves• The "family fish tank" metaphor reminds us children are only as healthy as their family ecosystemVisit jptrainsandspeaks.com to learn more about Bringing Baby Home workshops and resources for expectant parents and grandparents. Email Joni at joni.parthemer@gmail.com with questions.Visit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways: Strongermarriage.org Podcast.stongermarriage.org Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/strongermarriage/ Facebook Marriage Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/770019130329579 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/strongermarriagelife/ Dr. Dave Schramm: http://drdaveschramm.com http://drdavespeaks.com Dr. Liz Hale: http://www.drlizhale.com

    Joni Parthemer | Bringing Baby Home | #123

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 10, 2025 45:19


    Be sure to watch this and every episode of the Stronger Marriage Connection Podcast on YouTube: https://youtu.be/FCbpDpXNMpI Today on this episode of Stronger Marriage Connection, Dr. Liz Hale and Dr. DaveSchramm talk with Joni Parthemer, an expert in childbirth education and Director of the Bringing Baby Home program at the Gottman Institute. They discuss the challenges new parents face, how relationship dynamics shift after childbirth, and practical tools to maintain a strong partnership. Joni shares the science behind relationship satisfaction, emotional attunement, and co-parenting strategies that help couples navigate early parenthood successfully. This conversation also highlights the importance of postpartum support, grandparent involvement, and how families can create a shared legacy. Packed with expert insights and actionable tips, this episode is a must-listen for expecting and new parents! About Joni: Joni Parthemer holds a Masters in Curriculum and Instruction/Learning Styles degree and is both a Master Trainer and Education Director for the Bringing Baby Home Program. She also holds certification as a Childbirth Educator and International Childbirth Association Approved Trainer. Joni is a faculty member at Simkin Center for Allied Birth Professions at Bastyr University as well as a Specialist in the Birth and Family Education Department at Swedish Medical Center in Seattle. Joni serves as an educator, trainer and consultant for a variety of educational and organizational programs. She serves families and those who support them with engaging authenticity and wit. She is an award-wining, internationally recognized speaker and facilitator who infuses her decades of experience with her charismatic and energetic style. Joni has developed, published, and implemented, a variety of training materials for educators interested in providing support and growth programs for families and communities. She is married and the mother of two children. Insights: Joni: "A child's well-being is deeply influenced by the health of their family environment. The best gift parents can give their children is a strong, healthy relationship—whether married, divorced, or co-parenting. Parents serve as role models for future relationships, shaping how their children connect with others. By maintaining friendship, managing conflict with respect, and creating shared meaning through family rituals, couples can build a supportive and nurturing "family fish tank" that fosters lasting emotional security." Liz: "The CPR approach—Consistency, Predictability, and Responsiveness—is not just valuable for parenting but also strengthens all relationships, including marriage and friendship. By being reliable, steady, and attentive, we create trust and connection in our most important relationships." Dave: "Education is key to growth. With so many resources available today, we have endless opportunities to learn and improve as partners, parents, and individuals." Joni's Links & Resources: https://jptrainsandspeaks.com/   Visit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways:  Strongermarriage.org  Podcast.stongermarriage.org Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/strongermarriage/ Facebook Marriage Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/770019130329579 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/strongermarriagelife/   Dr. Dave Schramm: http://drdaveschramm.com http://drdavespeaks.com   Dr. Liz Hale: http://www.drlizhale.com    This episode is filled with invaluable insights on how to transition smoothly into parenthood while keeping your relationship strong. Tune in and discover practical tools to support your growing family!

    Why Marriage is So Important | Dr. Brad Wilcox | #122

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 3, 2025 52:30


    Besure to watch this and every episode on YouTube: https://youtu.be/pXpkkT0DyZA Today Dr. Liz Hale and Dr. Dave Schramm sit down with Dr. Brad Wilcox, professor of sociology and Director of the National Marriage Project at the University of Virginia. Dr. Wilcox shares compelling research on why marriage matters more today than ever before. They explore key benefits of marriage, including emotional support, financial stability, child well-being, and community strength. He also discusses challenges couples face, such as cohabitation risks, communication struggles, and shifting cultural attitudes toward commitment. This episode provides practical insights for couples navigating the complexities of modern relationships and offers hope for those seeking to build a strong, lasting marriage. About Dr. Wilcox: Freedom Fellow at the Institute for Family Studies, and a nonresident senior fellow atthe American Enterprise Institute. The author of Get Married: Why Americans Should Defy theElites, Forge Strong Families and Save Civilization (Harper Collins, 2024), Wilcox studiesmarriage, fatherhood, and the impact of strong and stable families on men, women, andchildren. Professor Wilcox is the author and coauthor of six books and has written for scientific journalssuch as The American Sociological Review and The Journal of Marriage and Family, as well aspopular outlets like The New York Times, The Wall Street Journal, The Atlantic, and NationalReview. With Nicholas H. Wolfinger, Wilcox is the co-author of Soul Mates: Religion, Sex, Love, andMarriage Among African Americans and Latinos (Oxford, 2016), which shines a spotlight on the lives of strong and happy minority couples. He is also the coauthor of Gender and Parenthood: Biological and Social Scientific Perspectives (Columbia, 2013) with Kathleen Kovner Kline. His research has been featured in The New York Times, The Wall Street Journal, The Atlantic, National Review Online, NPR, NBC’s The Today Show, and many other media outlets. Wilcox consults regularly with companies such as Nestle, Procter & Gamble, and Kimberly- Clark on fertility and marriage trends in the United States.As an undergraduate, Wilcox was a Jefferson Scholar at the University of Virginia (’92) and later earned his Ph.D. from Princeton University. Prior to coming to the University of Virginia, he held research fellowships at Princeton University, Yale University, and the Brookings Institution. Insights: Brad: "I think the one extra thing that I would that I would say is just trying to understand and appreciate kind of how you bring something unique to your marriage and family, and how, your spouse brings something unique to I think part of the challenge today is that in a more egalitarian age like ours, there can be kind of like competition or resentment around things not being exactly 5050, you know, in a marriage or family, and trying to just cultivate a sense of like, my wife does this, you know so much better than I do or vice my husband does that. You know so much better than I do. So just cultivating a sense of appreciation for the distinctive gifts andtalents that your spouse brings, and expressing that gratitude for those gifts and talents on regular basis, think is helpful." Liz: "Just say no to cohabiting and just say yes to getting married and staying married." Dave: "It's just a simple message earlier that you talked about, but you know what relation all relationships are going to have struggles. And we talked a little bit about intentionality, right where there it is choosing what to focus on, what to look at, what to text, how to respond. It's more of a kind of a slowing down, learning to respond, instead of react so quickly to things that are going on in the in the relationship, and to offer couples hope. You know, there's hope and happiness. We talk a lot about some doom and gloom, maybe some challenges and struggles that a lot of couples feel, but I really feel like there is, there is hope, sticking to the the basics, some of the basics that we've talked about, holding true to those, to those virtues, or those, those foundational principles. I think that that you've been taught, or maybe haven't been taughtin the home, but you can be a transitional character." Dr. Wilcox Links: Institute For Family Studies: https://ifstudies.org/blog/author/brad-wilcox American Enterprise Institute: https://www.aei.org/profile/w-bradford-wilcox/ Books: Get Married Soul Mates Gender and Parenthood   Visit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways:  Strongermarriage.org  Podcast.stongermarriage.org Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/strongermarriage/ Facebook Marriage Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/770019130329579 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/strongermarriagelife/   Dr. Dave Schramm: http://drdaveschramm.com http://drdavespeaks.com   Dr. Liz Hale: http://www.drlizhale.com    This episode provides a compassionate and practical guide for anyone seeking to build healthier perspectives around sexuality, reduce shame, and improve intimacy in their relationships. Don't miss this deeply insightful discussion!

    Why Do We Argue So Much? | Laura Heck & Zach Brittle | #121

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 24, 2025 49:39


    Be sure to watch this episode on YouTube: https://youtu.be/tEm34gytP4A Today  In this episode of Stronger Marriage Connection, Dr. Liz Hale and Dr. DaveSchramm sit down with Laura Heck and Zach Brittle, co-hosts of Marriage Therapy Radio. Together, they break down why couples argue and how to navigate disagreements in a healthy way. Drawing from Dr. John Gottman’s research, they explore practical strategies to express needs, take responsibility, regulate emotions, and increase appreciation. Whether you're looking to stop recurring fights or strengthen your connection, this episode is packed with actionable insights to improve communication and create lasting harmony in your relationship. About: Laura Heck is a licensed marriage and family therapist and Certified Gottman Therapist. She isa relationship specialist, meaning she doesn't work with teenagers, doesn't treat eatingdisorders, and doesn't heal past life trauma. Nope...Laura is solely focused on helping couples.That's it.  Better yet, if you are a busy professional couple with children at home that struggle with conflict and intimacy, you are exactly who Laura loves to help.Laura is co-host of Marriage Therapy Radio, hosts The Seven Principles for Making MarriageWork workshop for couples, coaches women through the Epic Wives Experiment, speaks andtrains for The Gottman Institute and is a regular media expert on the topic of intimaterelationships. Laura can often be found running through the wilderness with her pup, cooking up somethingfierce and golfing poorly. Laura has been with her beloved and patient husband for 16 yearsand they have a seven -year-old son together. Zach Brittle has been teaching, coaching, mentoring and counseling couples for nearly 20 years. He is a Licensed Mental Health Counselor (LMHC) in Washington and a Certified Gottman Therapist (CGT) specializing in evidence-based couples therapy based on over 40 years of marital research. He is the founder and co-host of Marriage Therapy Radio, creator of Your Marriage Masterclass, and the author of the best-selling relationship guide The Relationship Alphabet and the Marriage Therapy Journal. My writings and insights have also been featured on the Gottman Relationship Blog, Vanity Fair, Men’s Health Magazine, Real Simple Magazine, The New York Times and the Washington Post. He is happily married to Rebecca for 21 of 23 years – years #8 and 18 were bothpretty rough. We live in Seattle with our two daughters (14 & 18). We own a mini-van and most of the silverware we got as wedding presents. Links: Laura's Links: Marriage Therapy Radio PodcastWorkshop For CouplesEpic Wives ExperimentLaura's Gottman Profile Zach's Links: Your Marriage MasterclassThe Relationship AlphabetMarriage Therapy Journal   Visit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways:  Strongermarriage.org  Podcast.stongermarriage.org Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/strongermarriage/ Facebook Marriage Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/770019130329579 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/strongermarriagelife/   Dr. Dave Schramm: http://drdaveschramm.com http://drdavespeaks.com   Dr. Liz Hale: http://www.drlizhale.com    This episode provides a compassionate and practical guide for anyone seeking to build healthier perspectives around sexuality, reduce shame, and improve intimacy in their relationships. Don't miss this deeply insightful discussion!

    Relationship Evaluation | Don & Carrie Cole | #120

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 17, 2025 56:48


    Besure to watch this episode on YouTube: https://youtu.be/Lk5moCDwYWQ Today Don and Carrie Cole return and share with host Dr. Dave Schramm and Dr. Liz Hale a unique Relationship Evaluation checklist they created to help couples check up on there relationship connection. Don and Carrie also discuss unique insights and techniques they have learned in practice with couples at the Center for Relationship Wellness and The Gottman Institute to improve relationship connection and intimacy. About Dr. Don & Carrie Cole: Dr. Carrie Cole is the Director of Research for The Gottman Institute and manages the Gottman Love Lab. She holds a Ph.D. in psychological research and a master’s degree in counseling psychology. She is a licensed professional counselor and an approved LPC supervisor in the State of Texas, a licensed mental health counselor in the State of Washington, and a Certified Gottman Therapist. Carrie is a Master Trainer for The Gottman Institute and trains therapists in Gottman Method Couples Therapy around the world. She is a consultant for the certification program and has led The Art and Science of Love weekend workshop for couples multiple times a year since 2008. Carrie has also published peer-reviewed journal articles independently and with doctors John and Julie Gottman. Her work with couples includes couples therapy, workshops, seminars, and intensive marathon sessions. Carrie and her husband, Dr. Don Cole reside in Seattle, WA. Links: Centerforrelationshipwellness.comcarrie@gottman.comdon@gottman.comgottman.com   Visit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways: Strongermarriage.org  Podcast.stongermarriage.org Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/strongermarriage/ Facebook Marriage Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/770019130329579 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/strongermarriagelife/   Dr. Dave Schramm: http://drdaveschramm.com http://drdavespeaks.com   Dr. Liz Hale: http://www.drlizhale.com    This episode provides a compassionate and practical guide for anyone seeking to build healthier perspectives around sexuality, reduce shame, and improve intimacy in their relationships. Don't miss this deeply insightful discussion!

    Establishing Household Roles: Tips For Couples to Avoid Conflict | Dr. Julie Hanks | #119

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 10, 2025 36:00


    Be sure to watch this and every epsidoe of the podcast on YouTube: https://youtu.be/IQ3pSyQ-9HY Today on Stronger Marriage Connection, hosts Dr. Liz Hale and Dr. Dave Schramm sit down with Dr. Julie Hanks, a licensed therapist specializing in marriage and family therapy. They discuss the challenges couples face when dividing household labor and how to create a fair and equitable partnership. Dr. Hanks introduces the concept of a partnership model of family organization, emphasizing the importance of communication, shared responsibility, and recognizing invisible work. Listeners will learn how to navigate traditional gender roles, reduce resentment, and establish healthy household dynamics to strengthen their relationships. About Julie: Julie de Azevedo Hanks holds a PhD in marriage and family therapy and is a licensed therapist specializing in the intersection of faith, family relationships, and women's mental health for 3 decades. She is the owner of Wasatch Family Therapy, author of The Assertiveness Guide for Women, host of Ask Dr. Julie Hanks podcast, adjunct faculty in the MSW program at Utah Valley University, and an online content creator.  Insights: Julie: "Unpaid work is work, and it's just as important as paid work, and so value the work that you do that's unpaid, and value the work that your partner does that's unpaid. I just think that division has created a lot of problems in families. So, recognize and value unpaid work." Liz: "I think you know how to do the division without creating division, right, without creating more division. And so, I love that I hadn't really thought of unpaid labor and paid work, unpaid work. And paid work, I think, is maybe how you say it, and then coming home, and once the paid worker comes home, then how do we divide work from there? I had never thought of it that way. It's beautiful. It's kind of when that second part of the day begins." Dave: "I think that in addition to unpaid work and paid work, you brought up that kind of invisible or that worrying work, right? That, I think that it needs to be. Hey, thanks so much for planning this out. Or, you know, around the holiday season, my wife, she loves, you know, she takes over, but she loves it, then, you know, buying the presents for the kids, and she's just loves that, but there's a lot of actually mental planning and searching and on Amazon for, I mean, hours and deals. And she loves to get a deal, so I need to be more grateful, I think, as her husband." Dr. Julie Hank's Links: https://www.drjuliehanks.com/ https://www.facebook.com/DrJulieHanks https://www.facebook.com/DrJulieHanks https://www.pinterest.com/drjuliehanks/ https://www.instagram.com/drjuliehanks/ https://www.linkedin.com/in/drjuliehanks/   Visit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways: Strongermarriage.org  Podcast.stongermarriage.org Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/strongermarriage/ Facebook Marriage Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/770019130329579 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/strongermarriagelife/   Dr. Dave Schramm: http://drdaveschramm.com http://drdavespeaks.com   Dr. Liz Hale: http://www.drlizhale.com    This episode provides a compassionate and practical guide for anyone seeking to build healthier perspectives around sexuality, reduce shame, and improve intimacy in their relationships. Don't miss this deeply insightful discussion!

    Daily Acts of Love Build Strong Intimate Marriages | Dr. Alexandra Solomon | #118

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 3, 2025 40:37


    Be sure to watch this and every epsidoe of the podcast on YouTube: https://youtu.be/zjuKWgivYNo Today Dr. Alexandra Solomon, a renowned relationship expert, joins Dr. Liz Hale and Dr. Dave Schramm to discuss daily practices for love, relational self-awareness, and fostering intimacy. The conversation dives into overcoming relationship stagnation, understanding family of origin influences, and managing differences in relationship work. Learn how small, intentional actions and curiosity can transform your marriage into a thriving, intimate partnership.  About Dr. Solomon: Dr. Alexandra H. Solomon, PhD, is internationally recognized as one of today's most trustedvoices in the world of relationships, and her framework of Relational Self-Awareness hasreached millions of people around the globe. A couple’s therapist, speaker, author, andprofessor, Dr. Solomon is passionate about translating cutting-edge research and clinicalwisdom into practical tools people can use to bring awareness, curiosity, and authenticity totheir relationships. She is a clinician educator and a frequent contributor to academic journals,and she translates her academic and therapeutic experience to the public through her popularInstagram page, which has garnered over 200K followers. She is on faculty in the school ofEducation and Social Policy at Northwestern University and is a licensed clinical psychologistat The Family Institute at Northwestern University. Her hit podcast, Reimagining Love, reachestens of thousands of listeners across the globe each week and features high-profile guests from the worlds of therapy, academia, and pop culture. She is the award-winning author of two books: Taking Sexy Back and Loving Bravely, which was featured on the TODAY show.   Insights: Alexandra: "Be willing to study your reactivity. You know, the stuff that makes you feel tense, the stuff that makes you feel urgent, stuff that makes you feel kind of shut down or cynical or hopeless, to take a look at that and to and to be curious about what it what it's showing you about a place that you're stuck, or maybe something that you might need to ask for a bit differently than you have." Liz: "I spend a great majority of my time with couples on the here and now, thepresent and the future, and probably not nearly enough time on the past, the family of origin. But I love that you remind almost that we either put it in their place or it's going to run the show. So, it's really crucial to ask some of those key questions about each other's childhood and especially, especially your own." Dave: "I love the idea that just that concept of consistency, of that compassion, that love, what are we going to do for us today? Getting out of those ruts, they require just intentionality. They require a lot of work. They really do, but the best things in life really do require effort and intentional thinking ahead. Yeah, let me check in with my wife today. Or, hey, what's on your mind, or what's stressful? Or what can I do for you? Those types of check ins regularly, making those deposits into those love buckets I think are, are critical."   Dr. Solomon's Links: Website: https://dralexandrasolomon.com/ Podcast: https://dralexandrasolomon.com/podcast/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr.alexandra.solomon/?hl=en X: https://x.com/AHSolomon   Visit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways: Strongermarriage.org  Podcast.stongermarriage.org Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/strongermarriage/ Facebook Marriage Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/770019130329579 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/strongermarriagelife/   Dr. Dave Schramm: http://drdaveschramm.com http://drdavespeaks.com   Dr. Liz Hale: http://www.drlizhale.com    This episode provides a compassionate and practical guide for anyone seeking to build healthier perspectives around sexuality, reduce shame, and improve intimacy in their relationships. Don't miss this deeply insightful discussion!

    Avoid Divorce: Expert Tips from a Divorce Lawyer | Padideh Jafari, Esq | #117

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 27, 2025 46:55


    Be sure to watch this and every epsidoe of the podcast on YouTube: https://youtu.be/yoBDCp1li2w Today divorce attorney Padideh Jafari shares invaluable insights from her 22 years of experience. She delves into the common challenges marriages face, including financial stress, in-law interference, toxic positivity, and the seven- year itch. Padideh also provides practical tips for better communication, creating healthy boundaries, and the importance of self-awareness in marriage. This episode is a must-listen for anyone looking to strengthen their relationship or navigate marital challenges with wisdom and grace. About Padideh Jafari Padideh Jafari, Esq is the founder and CEO of Jafari Law & Mediation Office, APC, with locations in Los Angeles and Orange County. She earned her B.A. in Communication Studies with a minor in Psychology from Loyola Marymount University and her J.D. from Southwestern University School of Law. During law school, Mrs. Jafari served as a Judicial Extern for the Honorable Michael D. Rutberg of the Los Angeles Superior Court and clerked for the Los Angeles District Attorney’s Office, specializing in child abuse cases. She has also been an Adjunct Professor at NYU and the Southern California Institute of Law, teaching Family Law, Community Property, and Real Estate Law. Admitted to the California Bar and the U.S. District Court for the Central District of California in 2003, Mrs. Jafari has over 22 years of experience handling complex Family Law matters, including high-asset property division, business valuation, cash-flow analysis, and high-stakes custody litigation. She is highly regarded in the Los Angeles and Orange County legal communities as a skilled Family Law litigator. In addition to her legal practice, Mrs. Jafari co-hosts The Narcissist Abuse Recovery Channel (NARC), a weekly podcast focused on navigating divorce involving narcissistic partners. She frequently appears on television, YouTube, podcasts, and other media outlets to share her expertise. Insights: Padideh: "I would say that before you decide to file for a divorce, do everything humanly possible in order to see if you can make the marriage work. Obviously, if there are you know, domestic violence, that's something that you know cannot easily be worked out. But if there's communication problems, if there's resentments, if there are, you know, different expectations. Now, because remember, people grow right every year, somebody is growing and you want to be growing together and not growing apart. And so, I think it's important." Liz: "...turn over every stone. Let's make sure that we have looked at this left, right, upside down, backwards, inside out, to know that we've had [no] doubts there is no other way than divorce. I don't want people to leave or five years down the road say, gosh, looking back. What if? What if I found a better therapist? What if I tried harder? I want us to turn over every, every stumbling stone." Links: https://www.jafarilegal.com/ Instagram, Threads, TikTok: @JafariLegal https://www.jafarilegal.com/narcissist-abuse-recovery-channel-podcast/   Visit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways: Strongermarriage.org  Podcast.stongermarriage.org Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/strongermarriage/ Facebook Marriage Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/770019130329579 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/strongermarriagelife/   Dr. Dave Schramm: http://drdaveschramm.com http://drdavespeaks.com   Dr. Liz Hale: http://www.drlizhale.com    This episode provides a compassionate and practical guide for anyone seeking to build healthier perspectives around sexuality, reduce shame, and improve intimacy in their relationships. Don't miss this deeply insightful discussion!

    Chastity Before and Inside Marriage | Jason Evert | #116

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 20, 2025 41:50


    Be sure to watch this and every epsidoe of the podcast on YouTube: https://youtu.be/lz5PEu7SOlc In this episode of Stronger Marriage Connection, Jason Evert shares his insights onchastity, self-mastery, and the importance of authentic love in relationships. From defining chastity and its role in dating and marriage to discussing the damaging effects of pornography and the significance of tenderness in relationships, Jason provides actionable advice for singles and married couples alike. With a focus on faith-based values and practical guidance, this episode is a treasure trove for anyone looking to build stronger, healthier connections. About Jason Evert: Jason Evert has traveled to six continents to bring the message of purity to millions of peoplefor more than 20 years. He is a best-selling author of more than 15 books, including Saint John Paul the Great, How to Find Your Soulmate without Losing Your Soul, and the curriculum YOU: Life, Love, and the Theology of the Body. He is a frequent guest on podcasts and radio programs throughout the country, and his television appearances include MSNBC, Fox News, the BBC, and EWTN. Jason runs Chastity Project, hosts the podcast “Lust is Boring,” and leads an international alliance of young people who promote purity in more than 40 countries. Insights: Jason: "I remember a quote from Pope John Paul the second where he said, Love is a constant challenge thrown to us by God. And so simmer on that for a little bit. God is throwing you a challenge of love. The love isn't merely a feeling. There is a feeling sometimes, but Love is an act of the will. The kind that consists of preferring the good of the other to the good of the self." Liz: "I was struck by the culture of tenderness as well as the self-mastery. It goes back to what Dave often says, "A healthy we is made up of a healthy we." So I am goiung to be thinking a lot about tenderness and self-mastery through out the day after this interview." Dave: " The main theme that runs through all of this is this "outward mindset". It's not about me, it's not about the self self self! It's about an outward mindset and taking into account the other person and seeing the world from their perspective." Links: https://chastity.com   Visit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways: Strongermarriage.org  Podcast.stongermarriage.org Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/strongermarriage/ Facebook Marriage Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/770019130329579 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/strongermarriagelife/   Dr. Dave Schramm: http://drdaveschramm.com http://drdavespeaks.com   Dr. Liz Hale: http://www.drlizhale.com    This episode provides a compassionate and practical guide for anyone seeking to build healthier perspectives around sexuality, reduce shame, and improve intimacy in their relationships. Don't miss this deeply insightful discussion!

    Shame and Healthy Sexuality | Natasha Helfer | #115

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 13, 2025 58:26


    Today in this powerful episode, certified sex therapist Natasha Helfer joins Dave Schramm and Liz Hale to discuss the complex relationship between sexual health, faith, and cultural messages. Natasha sheds light on the damaging effects of sexual shame, the influence of purity culture, and the importance of open communication around intimacy. She offers actionable advice for parents, couples, and individuals to foster healthier sexual relationships, overcome shame, and approach intimacy with compassion and understanding. This conversation is filled with insights to help listeners navigate their sexual and relational well-being. About Natasha: The owner and founder of Symmetry Counseling. Natasha Helfer received her bachelor’s degree in Psychology from Brigham Young University and her master’s degree in Marriage and Family Therapy from Friends University. She also received her certifications as a sex therapist and sex therapist supervisor from the American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors, and Therapists (AASECT).  Natasha is licensed as a Marriage and Family Therapist in Kansas and Utah. She is also an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist.  Insights: Natasha: "...sexual shame is a public health crisis. It really is a crisis. And living here in Utah, we've got, you know, air crisis. You know, our air is kind of polluted, and we passed the thing about pornography being a crisis. I mean, you know, there's lots of ideas about what is a crisis, but I really, truly believe that sexual shame hits. So deep and can affect so many things, physical things, like vaginismus, like erections, like stomach issues, you know, like indigestion, like immune immunity systems. It can affect our emotional health. You know, if we have sexual shame, it can lead to depression, anxiety, it can lead to scrupulosity and OCD." Liz: "Those who have chosen to not have sex before marriage, or at least not in this relationship, they wanted to say that and to be really instructive of them to someone right, a professional or a parent or a friend an auntie, to say, let's talk about what you can expect. Let's talk about really giving yourself some time on that even, I think you said three to six months, maybe Natasha right to really get your bodies adjusted and how this is going to be, and ways to converse about your sexuality and your preferences. Don't expect that just to take off on that first night. There's a lot of disappointment, a lot of shame. I think that comes from that not being what you're what you think your partner wanted." Dave: "We talked a little bit about parenting and the approach the parents take, they have to be proactive and intentional, thoughtful about the messages. Because, Natasha, you talked about you can take, you know, one direction and induce more shame, or it can be a positive, uplifting experience for parents that they've got to be willing and you have to talk about this topic. So I think, yes, first, I think it starts with parents and when children are young, and then keeping it it's not a one and done conversation, keeping that conversation going. And yes, absolutely. Couples before marriage, got to be able to talk and then keep the conversation going afterwards. It can't be something that all sudden. It's just silent and we don't talk about afterwards, or that was uncomfortable, or what happened there, and it's now I'm embarrassed and the shame cycle, wow, we've got to be able to, just as a broader society be able to talk and share and be open and honest in our conversation." Links: https://www.natashahelfer.com/ https://symcounseling.com/   Visit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways: Strongermarriage.org  Podcast.stongermarriage.org Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/strongermarriage/ Facebook Marriage Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/770019130329579 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/strongermarriagelife/   Dr. Dave Schramm: http://drdaveschramm.com http://drdavespeaks.com   Dr. Liz Hale: http://www.drlizhale.com    This episode provides a compassionate and practical guide for anyone seeking to build healthier perspectives around sexuality, reduce shame, and improve intimacy in their relationships. Don't miss this deeply insightful discussion!

    Defining Gender Roles In Marriage | Dr. Daniel Carlson | #114

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 6, 2025 39:42


    Dr. Daniel Carlson joins Dave and Liz to discuss the division of household labor and its impact on marital satisfaction. From managing the mental load to ensuring fairness, Dr. Carlson shares research-backed strategies for balancing responsibilities at home. They explore the effects of the pandemic on gender roles, the importance of communication, and how couples can navigate household responsibilities to strengthen their relationships. This episode offers practical tips and insights for couples at all life stages, helping them foster mutual support and appreciation in their partnership. #marriageadvice #householdchores #genderroles This engaging episode highlights the importance of communication, fairness, and shared responsibility, offering actionable strategies to build stronger and more equitable relationships. Tune in for valuable insights and expert advice.   About Dan Carlson is an associate professor of Family and Consumer Studies at the University of Utah and a Senior Fellow at the Council on Contemporary Families. He is a public scholar whose research has appeared in numerous television, print, and radio media outlets. Generally, his scholarship examines the causes and consequences of the Second Demographic Transition in U.S. society with a particular focus on the gendered division of labor. Currently, he is conducting an NSF-funded study examining long-term shifts in U.S. parents' divisions of labor since the beginning of the COVID-19 pandemic and their association with parents' well-being. Insights Daniel - "Don't sleep on the division of labor. You know, it may not be fun to talk about, it may not be sexy to talk about, but it's important to have these conversations with your partner about what you and they envision the load to be in your family. Who's going to do what you know, if you don't talk about it, you run the risk, potentially, of having somebody who has very different idea about these things, and that can potentially be problematic, so have that conversation, and, you know, make sure that the approach on the same page well, but when it comes to who's going to do what." Liz - "Instead of work life, balance, work life, justice, I kind of liked that a lot. I was just looking at the definition of justice as a concern for justice, peace and genuine respect for people, which I love. And I guess it goes back to the communication of even just acknowledging that I'm not going to be home much this week before six o'clock, Honey, can we talk about how that's going to go and just what you're going to need from me most, and what I'm going to need from you most? Can we? Can I pick your brain? Can we have that discussion? I think that's just so lovely, because it really is not going to be that that balance. I think some weeks are just going to be very off balance because of life." Dave - "It's got me thinking that you we really can divide responsibilities without dividing the relationship, if you will. It's and sometimes it's the give and take."     Visit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways:  Strongermarriage.org  Podcast.stongermarriage.org  Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/strongermarriage/  Facebook Marriage Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/770019130329579  Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/strongermarriagelife/    Dr. Dave Schramm:  http://drdaveschramm.com  http://drdavespeaks.com    Dr. Liz Hale:  http://www.drlizhale.com  

    Men Matter: Husbands Need Support Too | Leslie Doares | #113

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 30, 2024 45:33


    In this episode, Lesli Doares joins Dave and Liz to discuss the Hero Husband Project and practical ways husbands can strengthen their marriages. From building emotional safety and communication skills to creating a marriage blueprint, Lesli offers actionable advice for nurturing connection and fostering mutual respect. With over 20 years of experience, Lesli empowers husbands to step into their roles as partners and grow their relationships with intention. Whether it’s addressing common mistakes or implementing small, impactful changes, this episode is a must-listen for anyone looking to deepen their marital bond. #menmatter #mentalhealthmatters #menandmarriage #marriageaadvice About Lesli Doares brings over twenty years of experience working with individuals and couples as acoach and therapist. Combined with her personal experience in an almost 40-year relationshipwith her husband, she has created a paradigm shift in marriage so it can become a space where both partners feel respected and included. Lesli is well known for her direct but compassionate approach – gentle, but total honesty iswhat you’ll get. Her commitment to her marriage and children led her to crisscross the country a couple of times until the L. A. girl settled down in the South. She brings this fusion of cultures to both her business and her life. She is also the author of Blueprint for a Lasting Marriage: How to Create Your Happily Ever After with More Intention, Less Work and Being a Hero Husband: How to Make Your Wife (and You) Happy. Insights Lesli - "Relationships are only natural up to a point, and then they need some skills. You actually need to know how to work through these things. Because everybody you know, love is something that needs to be attended to. You need to feed it. You need to make sure that it's you know, because it can ebb and flow, and if we want to keep it going, we actually have to focus on it. And if we just leave relationships to chance, they're not going to work very well." Liz - "There's just not enough support for men. So, Leslie, I'm so glad that it's you. I love this whole idea of the hero husband, because it's true, they want to be heroes, and we want them to be our heroes. So certain things we as women need to do and need to stop doing. And, to make room for him to show up as a husband. And I love your thought for husbands about the physical and emotional safety for women. If they could really focus on that, gosh, we'll respond favorably." Dave - "I think there's some things as husbands that we can do better, more of, less of. I think one of those for me is to listen past the edge of the voice or the tone, and I think beneath the problem is pain. So looking for the pain beneath the problem the pain point is there fear? Is there frustration? Is there an unmet need, perhaps that's beneath all that. So, listen past that, instead of reacting and trying to get defensive. Listen to what's really hurting, what is underneath all of that, and how can I respond to that, instead of respond to the maybe the edge or the tone of the voice?" Links https://www.theherohusbandproject.com/ https://foundationscoachingnc.com/   Visit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways:  Strongermarriage.org  Podcast.stongermarriage.org  Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/strongermarriage/  Facebook Marriage Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/770019130329579  Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/strongermarriagelife/    Dr. Dave Schramm:  http://drdaveschramm.com  http://drdavespeaks.com    Dr. Liz Hale:  http://www.drlizhale.com  

    A Key To Keep Romance Alive: Married Dating | Brandon Porter | #112

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 23, 2024 39:48


    Today Dr. Brandon Porter joins Dave and Liz to explore the importance of intentionality and creativity in keeping date nights alive. Brandon shares practical tips for busy couples, including the role of planning, novelty, and nostalgia in fostering connection. With a focus on affordability and accessibility, the conversation highlights how even small, intentional efforts can reignite romance and strengthen relationships. Whether it’s a cozy at-home date or a fresh experience, couples will find inspiration to prioritize quality time together. #marrieddating #marriageadvice #datingtips #datingideas #noveltyinmarriage About Brandon obtained a master's degree in family and human development and a PhD in education, both from Utah State University. He has developed curriculum for, presented on, and teaches college-level courses in marriage and family relationships. Brandon and his wife, Danielle, have created resources to support partners in deepening their friendship, increasing their harmony, and keeping date night alive. They've been married for 20 years and are the parents of 6 kids. Insights Brandon - "When it comes to consistent date nights. Don't make it perfect, just make it happen." Liz - "I love the anticipation. That's something I'm going to apply. Starting today. We have a couple things coming up, and I'm going to send Benny a couple texts on that, anticipating and being together for whatever it might be." Dave - "I love the nostalgia idea. I love the novelty, the fun, the creativity. Togetherness, and I love that it's planned, intentional time, that togetherness." Links Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MarriageBuilttoThrive Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/marriagebuilttothrive/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@marriagebuilttothrive   Visit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways:  Strongermarriage.org  Podcast.stongermarriage.org  Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/strongermarriage/  Facebook Marriage Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/770019130329579  Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/strongermarriagelife/    Dr. Dave Schramm:  http://drdaveschramm.com  http://drdavespeaks.com    Dr. Liz Hale:  http://www.drlizhale.com  

    How To Choose a Therapist | Dr. Liz Hale | #111

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 16, 2024 41:44


    Today Dr. Dave Schramm interviews co-host Dr. Liz Hale on the best strategies for finding the right marriage therapist. They discuss what to look for, key questions to ask, and the importance of fit and specialized training in couples therapy. Whether you're considering marriage therapy for the first time or want to ensure you're working with the right professional, this episode provides practical advice to navigate the process effectively.   About Dr. Liz Hale Dr. Liz Hale is a passionate marriage and family therapist with over 30 years of experiencehelping couples navigate the complexities of their relationships. Whether working with thoseeager to save their marriage or couples uncertain about their future together, Dr. Liz creates asafe, supportive space to explore the best path forward. Her flexible private practice allows forextended sessions tailored to each couple's unique needs, blending joint and individualconsultations to foster open communication and effective progress. Dr. Liz’s approach is rooted in personal experience and professional expertise. She understands the challenges of marriage firsthand, viewing it as both a humbling teacher and a source of profound fulfillment. With a doctorate in Clinical Psychology and specialized training from renowned experts like Dr. John Gottman, Dr. Sue Johnson, and Dr. David Burns, she integrates research-backed methods with personalized care to help couples thrive. As a former host of KSL's The Dr. Liz Hale Show and current resident expert on Studio 5, Dr. Liz is known for her relatable, insightful advice on everything from stress to intimacy. While LDSherself, she welcomes clients of all backgrounds, incorporating their beliefs and values into acollaborative approach that strengthens their relationships. Dr. Liz is dedicated to guidingcouples toward happier, healthier marriages built on mutual respect, trust, and connection.   Inights: Liz: "Liz addressed tough topics like the financial aspects of therapy and when divorce might be necessary. To enhance her impact, she could share more personal anecdotes or client stories (anonymized) and suggest simple, actionable steps listeners can take athome. Her focus on accountability and kindness created a lasting impression." Resources: Marriage Friendly Therapist: https://www.marriagefriendlytherapists.com/ Gottman Referal Network: https://gottmanreferralnetwork.com/ American Association of Marriage & Family Therapist https://www.aamft.org/ Psychology Today https://www.psychologytoday.com/us Good Therapy https://www.goodtherapy.org/   Visit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways:  Strongermarriage.org  Podcast.stongermarriage.org  Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/strongermarriage/  Facebook Marriage Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/770019130329579  Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/strongermarriagelife/    Dr. Dave Schramm:  http://drdaveschramm.com  http://drdavespeaks.com    Dr. Liz Hale:  http://www.drlizhale.com  

    The Empowered Wife: How Resilience Can Save Your Marriage | Laura Doyle | #110

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 9, 2024 65:02


    Today on this episode of Stronger Marriage Connection, Dr. Liz Hale speaks with Laura Doyle, New York Times bestselling author of The Empowered Wife and a relationship coach dedicated to ending world divorce. Laura shares the six intimacy skills that transformed her own marriage and have since helped thousands of women restore love and passion in their relationships. With practical advice on addressing common marital challenges, including respect, self-care, and creating a spouse-fulfilling prophecy, this episode offers a roadmap for a thriving marriage. About Laura Doyle: New York Times bestselling author Laura Doyle was the perfect wife…until she married. When she tried to improve her husband, he avoided her. She nearly divorced. Then she asked happy wives for their secrets and…got her miracle. Laura’s books are published in 30 countries, and she founded a coach training school. But she’s proudest of her 35-year marriage to John, who’s been dressing himself since before she was born. Insights: Laura: Laura’s passion for empowering women to transform their marriages stands out. Her relatable storytelling and actionable advice about practicing respect, expressing desires, and using the "spouse-fulfilling prophecy" provided listeners with tangible tools for improving their relationships. Her vulnerability in sharing personal struggles and triumphs made her advice both credible and inspiring. Her emphasis on positivity, gratitude, and accountability resonated deeply, leaving a lasting message ofhope and empowerment. Links: https://lauradoyle.org/ https://connect.lauradoyle.org/roadmap   Visit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways:  Strongermarriage.org  Podcast.stongermarriage.org  Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/strongermarriage/  Facebook Marriage Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/770019130329579  Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/strongermarriagelife/    Dr. Dave Schramm:  http://drdaveschramm.com  http://drdavespeaks.com    Dr. Liz Hale:  http://www.drlizhale.com  

    No More Mr. Nice Guy? | Brannon and Tyler Patrick | #109

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 2, 2024 43:42


    Today on Stronger Marriage Connection, Dr. Dave Schramm and Dr. Liz Hale talk with therapist brothers Tyler and Brannon Patrick about the "Mr. Nice Guy" persona and its impact on relationships. Often driven by fear and insecurity, this behavior can unintentionally undermine trust and intimacy. The Patricks share how men can embrace authenticity, healthy masculinity, and deeper connection, offering actionable advice on boundaries, communication, and building a courageous marriage. Whether you relate to these challenges or seek to strengthen your relationship, this episode provides valuable insights. #nomoremrniceguy #marriage101 #marriageadvice About: Tyler has been dedicated to his own recovery for over 15 years, striving to live the principles he teaches and becoming a man of courage, passion, and love. Married for over 20 years and a proud father of four daughters, he enjoys fly-fishing, backpacking, training his German shorthair pointer, River, and supporting his children's interests. As a marriage and family therapist, Tyler specializes in recovery from sexual addiction and betrayal trauma. He believes those who fully embrace recovery not only regain their lives but also become exceptional spouses and parents. He feels honored to guide individuals on their journey toward a connected and transformed life. Brannon is passionate about repairing broken relationships and has created several programs for addiction recovery and betrayal. Since 2015, his online content has reached and helped heal thousands of couples worldwide. As co-clinical director and owner of TherapyUTAH, he has extensive experience treating various addictions in settings ranging from inpatient psychiatric care to intensive outpatient programs. Brannon is also a Certified Sexual Addiction Therapist with specialized training in recovery. In addition to his clinical work, Brannon is a writer, blogger, podcaster, and content creator. He co-hosts The Betrayed, The Addicted, and The Expert podcast with Ashlynn and Coby Mitchell, offering unique perspectives on relationships, recovery, and addiction to guide listeners through meaningful change. Insights: Bannon: "Really examine what is real, honest and authentic in a relationship. It's not just saying yes, I did that or no I didn't. It's showing up authentic. It's showing yourself in a relationship. And Mr. Nice Guys, they're scared to do that, and so to do that work takes courage, it's hard work, but it's the key to an actual relationship, because you can't know them unless they show themselves." Tyler: "If you're feeling mad that we just talked about being a Mr. Nice Guy, you need to look at that. You should go take a look at what it is that's turning inside of you. And the next best step would be to take that feeling and actually go and approach your spouse and ask about it. Have a discussion about it. So, open up the discussion about where things don't seem like they're quite fitting, even though everything looks pretty on the outside. And that discussion will be a great Kickstart to something even better." Liz: "I love this whole thought about Eastern philosophy, the yin and the yang, and that the more the more feminine I can be, the more masculine it inspires my husband to be, and vice versa. So, women are not helpless hopeless. They really can take a stand. They can even use my two favorite words of I can't when they're asked to do something that keeps men kind of in that mode of not being accountable and staying afraid." Dave: "This difference of wrestling, okay, but isn't it good to be nice, it's good to be kind. So I'm glad that you clarify right kindness and care and compassion, but it's really like the motive, what's going on underneath, and is it, does it stem from fear or this genuine or authentic, right, desire to be kind, but also to have my own voice and to that it's not this facade, You know, I'm genuine, I am authentic, if this is who I am, and that can be a kind, not even nice, person, but if there's something to the stirring underneath, that's where some of the struggle then comes from. And then I love that, that foundationof safety and trust that you talked about, that that will eventually erode so all kinds of little lights and things going on in my brain." Links: https://therapybrothers.org/about-us/https://www.therapyutah.org/meet-brannon-patrick/https://lovestrong.com/our-podcasts/   Visit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways:  Strongermarriage.org  Podcast.stongermarriage.org  Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/strongermarriage/  Facebook Marriage Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/770019130329579  Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/strongermarriagelife/    Dr. Dave Schramm:  http://drdaveschramm.com  http://drdavespeaks.com    Dr. Liz Hale:  http://www.drlizhale.com  

    Disconnect to Reconnect: Strengthening Marriage in a Digital World | Blake Snow | #108

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 25, 2024 41:22


    Today on the Stronger Marriage Connection, Dave Schramm and Liz Hale sit down with Blake Snow, author of Log Off, to discuss the impact of technology on relationships. Blake shares practical tips for setting boundaries with devices, finding balance, and rediscovering meaningful connection with loved ones. From "Montana moments" to screen-free Sundays, Blake offers simple strategies to reclaim your time and focus on what truly matters. Tune in to learn how to foster stronger relationships by managing technology use with intention and purpose About Blake Snow: Award-winning journalist Blake Snow writes for Fortune 500 companies, fancy publications, and 80% of America’s leading travel media. He is the best-selling author of two books, Log Off and Measuring History. A two-time marathoner, former 96% chess player, and avid recording artist, Blake enjoys cooking, playing soccer, and reading 8-10 books per year. High energy is his superpower. Liver in the present. Believer in the afterlife. Die-hard optimist. Blake resides with his wife and five children in Provo, Utah. Insights: Blake: "You can do this. And I mean that generally like, if you don't like what's going on with your life on your phone and social media, you can make changes. You can do hard things, like, look back at all this incredible stuff humanity, that team human has done for centuries, and you're a part of that. And you can do something I might seems challenging. Uh. Or even with your relationship, but you're capable of great things. And I know and think and believe strongly that each of us have the capacity to change andmake changes in our life in a way that works for us and excites us and brings us towards greater health and fulfillment. So you can do this." Liz: "I'm thinking of all kinds of things, all kinds of changes I'd like to make. Because, you know, if, if I don't control it, it, it is going to control me, info technology. And I'm even just thinking, you know, on date night, I always want my phone with me to clip pictures of Ben and I, dear friend of mine, once said, who lost her husband, she goes Liz. I'm so glad I took pictures on date night, so I make the excuse to have my phone there, but it is a distraction. So I'm thinking of investing in a small camera, and I'm thinking of going back to hard copy scriptures, because again, I take my phone to church. Why? Because scriptures are on there, but it's a distraction. So anyway, all kinds of things are running through my mind." Dave: "We've got to take back our time, take back our family, our activities, or put this instead of a half hour in the morning, I'm just going to go and scroll. Maybe go for a walk. Even better, phone a friend. Check in, use your technology." Links: https://blakesnow.com/about/   Visit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways:  Strongermarriage.org  Podcast.stongermarriage.org  Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/strongermarriage/  Facebook Marriage Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/770019130329579  Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/strongermarriagelife/    Dr. Dave Schramm:  http://drdaveschramm.com  http://drdavespeaks.com    Dr. Liz Hale:  http://www.drlizhale.com  

    Avoid Divorce: A Couple's Guide to Rebuilding Love and Connection | Casey and Meygan Caston | #107

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 18, 2024 57:16


    In this inspiring episode of Stronger Marriage Connection, Dave Schramm and LizHale welcome Casey and Meygan Caston, founders of Marriage 365, to share their journey from the brink of divorce to becoming marriage mentors. They discuss practical tools like the weekly marriage business meeting, emotional check-ins, and the 60-second blessing to help couples reconnect and thrive. With an emphasis on curiosity, intentionality, and self-awareness, the Castons provide actionable insights to strengthen relationships and build a lasting legacy of love. Rebuilding love and connection starts with intentionality, curiosity, and the courage to work on yourself. Simple, consistent habits can create a strong, lasting marriage. About Casey & Meygan: Just three years into marriage, we were voted the couple least likely to succeed. We literallyhated each other and had no idea how to get back the love and connection we’d once felt.Through lots of stumbling and trial and error, we did manage to walk back from the brink ofdivorce. But it was incredibly hard. Largely because there were no affordable and accessibleresources for us back then. We felt like we were fumbling around in the dark. So we created the exact resource we wish we’d had: Marriage365. Our restored marriage wasthe inspiration to help other couples who were feeling stuck, lost, and confused about how toreconnect. Today, our app and website reach millions of couples around the world every day,providing practical advice, tools, and inspiration. You can find all of those resources atwww.marriage365.com. Our mission is to create a safe place for people to grow and askquestions that is available to anyone. Money or privilege should never prevent someone fromgetting the tools they need to better themselves and their relationships.   Insights: Meygan: "I think everybody should lift up their head and do an emotional check in with themselves, and pick an area of their life where they know that it could probably be better, health, parenting, work, marriage, and just ask yourself, what's working, what's not working, and what needs to change. And that will be truly a gift of self care for someone listening today." Casey: "If you want to make a better marriage, make a better you, it is a message of empowerment, and it means that you can actually work on your marriage by yourself. You don't have to wait and don't have to feel stuck because your partner's not willing to join. That means, as Liz, I think you said, we take 100% responsibility of our of our marriage, and we own it and we they I'm gonna work on myself, regardlessof you. And I think marriage forces you to work on yourself, like when you're single, nobody can come over and go, You know what? You should really shouldn't say stuff like that. It's inappropriate. Marriage is a great tool for self development." Liz: "...the power of the tongue. Your Words have the power to give life or death. Yep, we know that. I just don't think of that nearly enough." Dave: "I think that that, honesty, is the key to the stronger marriage connection. I mean, the 60 seconds. It's this intentionality, it's, you know what? But I've never done that, and that might feel awkward for me, but if couples will just do it, adopt some of these positive practices to build that relationship connection. Check in, think of that other person, get curious, ask some questions, and then the sincere compliments,really genuinely eye to eye, knee ball, knee or eyeball to eyeball, kneecap to kneecap, looking them in the eye, and sharing how you really feel deeply about them, whether you appreciate about them." Links: https://marriage365.com/  

    Understanding Our Emotional Cycles | Jake Baczuk | #106

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 11, 2024 47:43


    In this insightful episode of Stronger Marriage Connection, Dr. Dave Schramm andDr. Liz Hale are joined by therapist Jake Baczuk to explore the transformative concepts of the pain and peace cycles. Jake, a clinical manager and couples’ therapist, explains how negative patterns in behavior and communication create pain cycles that keep couples stuck in frustration and resentment. He introduces the peace cycle as a way to disrupt these patterns by focusing on understanding underlying emotions and unmet needs. Tune in to learn about the practical tools and techniques to foster empathy, self-reflection, and more peaceful responses in your relationships. About Jake Baczuk: Jake is a clinical manager for evolvedMD, an integrated behavioral health company that utilizes the Collaborative Care Model in Primary Care settings. Jake is passionate about this because they are creating access to mental and behavioral health to a population that would not otherwise receive help. It's amazing! He enjoys writing and playing music, playing softball, watching baseball, and spending time with his wife and three kids. He enjoys doing couples therapy and hope’s to start a small private practice in the near future. Insights: Jake: "Recognize that we're all human beings. We're all human beings that are going to make mistakes that we're not necessarily broken or wrong or anything like that, because our love or trustworthiness was breached at some point in our life. We're just human beings, right? And when we understand that human element of ourselves, then we have so many opportunities to move in directions that are healthy, that we want to go, whether it's individually or within our relationship or within our family or at work or anything like that, right? So we're all human beings." Liz: "I think whether we're partners or just people, individuals. We're powerful. So, as we look at the pain cycle or the peace cycle, I just think that there's probably a magic in the pause just to think, now wait a minute, where might that person be coming from? What's really going underneath their behavior? So, I love that. I love the reminder of that cycle." Dave: "I think what stood out is when you talked about the boxes and learning not to react to your partner's behavior, but really respond to what's underneath, and that's the emotions. These needs are often deep and hidden, but if we can look past that and really see them and understand them, may not even agree with that, but still to understand with that, that understanding is powerful, and understanding this, thispain and these peace cycles that we're often blind to. We don't get it. We're so deep into it that we can't step outside and see that we're stuck and often creating the very problems that we don't like in our in the own reactions that our partner, that we're almost helping to create those which is this, yeah, this paradox." Links: Visit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways:  Strongermarriage.org  Podcast.stongermarriage.org  Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/strongermarriage/  Facebook Marriage Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/770019130329579  Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/strongermarriagelife/    Dr. Dave Schramm:  http://drdaveschramm.com  http://drdavespeaks.com    Dr. Liz Hale:  http://www.drlizhale.com  

    Listening and Emotional Regulation | Heather Holmgren | #105

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 4, 2024 40:53


    In this episode of Stronger Marriage Connection, hosts Dr. Dave Schramm and Dr.Liz Hale sit down with Heather Holmgren, a marriage and family therapist and founder of Simple Modern Therapy. Heather shares insights on emotional regulation, the essential skill of deep listening, and how to approach conflict with curiosity rather than reactivity. She explains the importance of self- awareness, emotional control, and co-regulation to help couples navigate difficult conversations. Heather provides actionable advice for slowing down during conflicts, truly hearing your partner, and fostering a healthy, supportive relationship. Tune in to discover practical tips to strengthen communication and deepen your connection. About Heather: Heather Holmgren, LMFT and founder of Simple Modern Therapy, has committed her 20-yearcareer to understanding what makes a modern relationship thrive.Through it all she has foundthis much to be true: if you aren't happy with yourself, your intimate and professionalrelationships are likely to fail. She has built a flourishing career and flourishing practice helping contemporary individuals, relationships and families learn to love each other, “Love Yourself and Love Your Life." She is one of eight incredible therapists providing support to individuals and relationships indowntown Salt Lake City (and Utah, virtually). All Simple Modern therapists have additionaltraining and expertise in relationship work, as well as providing affirming care to LGBTQIA+relationships. Heather is passionate about professional mentorship and has supervised clinicians for the lastten years. She is a strong advocate for the practice of good mental hygiene, and can be foundspeaking on this topic, as well as relationship related issues on Good Things Utah, at EdisonHouse and for corporations across the state. You can also find Heather, with her colleagueAndrès Brown, providing training, support and consultation to the larger therapeuticcommunity, expanding the reach of skilled and affirming inclusive relationship therapy. Insights: Heather: "The more aware you are of where you are emotionally, what kind of outside stressors are impacting your mental health and mood can really be a big factor in how you're showing up in your relationships. So take care of yourself. Take care of yourself. It's not selfish, it is self care, and that helps us be much more effective in our relationships. And you know, secondarily, I feel like I have to say that listening is anart, and if we think we're good at communicating, we have to ask ourselves, how good am I at really listening to understand at relationally attuning." Liz: "Just thinking about speaking of being generous and kind. I think listening is one of the more generous and kindest things that we can do." Dave: "I think it's when you're talking about the pause. I just think that there's a power in the pause. The power in the pause to be able to not react, to be able to gives us at least a chance, pause, take a breath, allow our hearts, our minds, our brains, to be able to okay, I'm going to reflect and respond instead of react right now." Links: https://simplemodern.org/ https://www.instagram.com/simplemoderntherapy/?hl=en https://www.facebook.com/SimpleModernTherapy https://www.linkedin.com/company/simple-modern-therapy/  

    Love for Mental Illness | Andy Hogan | #104

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 28, 2024 64:32


    Dr. Dave Schramm and Dr. Liz Hale welcome licensed mental health counselor Andy Hogan, who shares his personal journey with mental illness and how it has influenced his work with others. Andy introduces his REACH acronym—a powerful tool designed to support both those living with mental illness and their loved ones. The discussion dives into the importance of love over fear in the healing journey, methods to recognize and manage symptoms, and ways to build empathy and connection. Learn how to better support mental health with compassion and understanding. About Andy Hogan: Andrew personally suffered a manic psychosis breakdown while serving a mission in Taiwan. He was tranquilized and woke up in a hospital in Provo. During a month-stay in the hospital, his high school sweetheart decided to end their relationship. They never talked about why, she just slowly made less and less contact and avoided him over a period of time. 3 years later, Andrew became so desperate for an answer, he proposed. She said, "I can't." This was his rock bottom moment, where the choice was either stop living or start to REACH. REACH is the acronym for the steps Andrew took personally, and the steps he later would teach professionally of how to find love for mental illness.1. Recognize the source of my symptoms.2. Emerge from denial and isolation.3. Authenticate self and mental illness.4. Control the disorder as we are able.5. Heighten our lives. While learning to REACH, Andrew started dating again. On jod first date with Sariah who had also served a mission in Taiwan, he told her he was the one who went crazy on the island. She replied, "That was you?" She had served in a different mission over a year after his breakdown, but she had heard about the missionary who went crazy. After our date, Sariah talked to her parents who said, "If you decide to love him, we will love him too." They chose to give love for mental illness and Sariah courageously decided to keep dating me. Their marriage started as a choice for love instead of a reaction to fear of mental illness. Making that choice again and again for going-on 30 years now, is how REACH has made for happiness and growing connection in their relationship. Insights: Andy: "the thing you can do to help someone with mental illness or to help yourself, if you're the one, if you recognize mental illness in yourself, the thing you can do is to face your fears and learn to love in yourn thoughts, in your beliefs and in your actions, there is something you can do, and it works, it helps. That is the thing you can do for mental illness, is give love. Give love for mental illness." Liz: " love this whole fear, this whole idea about fear really creates more pain, creates more separation, but that love and acceptance would create, that's what creates health and connection. They stuff that was really beautiful. I'm going to think differently about mental illness because of our time with you, Andy." Dave: "I love the reach acronym. Our illness doesn't define us. It is our feelings. All that we're struggling with doesn't define us." Links: www.ReachAndyHogan.com https://www.youtube.com/@reachandyhogan   Visit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways:  Strongermarriage.org  Podcast.stongermarriage.org  Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/strongermarriage/  Facebook Marriage Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/770019130329579  Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/strongermarriagelife/    Dr. Dave Schramm:  http://drdaveschramm.com  http://drdavespeaks.com    Dr. Liz Hale:  http://www.drlizhale.com  

    Infertility Trauma, Reproductive Health, and Therapy | Amelia Hopkin | #103

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 21, 2024 53:27


    In this episode of Stronger Marriage Connection, Dr. Liz Hale and Dr. Dave Schramm talk with licensed clinical social worker Amelia Hopkin about the emotional and physical struggles associated with infertility. Amelia shares how fertility issues impact relationships, the role offamily support, and the healing power of EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) and ART (Accelerated Resolution Therapy) for couples dealing with reproductive health trauma. She also provides guidance on navigating infertility treatments and offers valuable resources for those on this difficult journey. About Amelia Hopkin: Amelia Hopkin has spent the last 23 years providing help and building relationships with medical providers, community organizations, researchers, educators and most importantly, families who experience one of the hardest kinds of experiences... Infant or pregnancy loss, infertility, unexpected birth experiences, various degrees and types of postpartum depression, NICU stays as well as sexual or health related trauma. She has been a speaker and trainer at both national and international conferences (ask her about speaking to the UN and her month at the HRC!), a published researcher, is certified in EMDR and trained in ART (the therapy kind, she's a horrible artist and needs to label her stick figures). As one of the only trained EMDR intensive providers in the state of Utah, she helps those who have limited time and significant trauma find deep and meaningful healing. Click on the EMDR tab for more info on that. When not in the office, Amelia may be getting in over her head on a DIY project, reading books, dreaming up a new travel adventure, finding nature, looking for ways to avoid doing laundry or trying out a new restaurant or recipe. Insights: Amelia: "...if you're experiencing fertility struggles, you are not alone, that number is one in six. There are some really fantastic resources." Liz: "the thought of getting comfortable with being uncomfortable, right with whatever it is that is troubling us..." Dave" "I think my takeaway the day really is the no shame, no blaming of yourself through this journey, I'm sure, so easily to turn inward and then to have those suffocating feelings that can feel overwhelming, that affect your marriage and your outlook, your life, your eating, sleeping every this will affect your lifein so many ways. I hope people won't go there or stay there too long. Did you realize this is nothing you did you know anything so not that. Avoid that blame and shame game. Keep those eyes up and looking for resources and help." Links: https://www.growing-the-good.com/   Visit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways:  Strongermarriage.org  Podcast.stongermarriage.org  Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/strongermarriage/  Facebook Marriage Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/770019130329579  Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/strongermarriagelife/    Dr. Dave Schramm:  http://drdaveschramm.com  http://drdavespeaks.com    Dr. Liz Hale:  http://www.drlizhale.com  

    Establishing Healthy Boundaries in Marriage | Boone Christianson & Kaprena Moore | #102

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 14, 2024 61:31


    In this episode of Stronger Marriage Connection, Dr. Dave Schramm and Dr. Liz Hale sit down with marriage therapists Boone Christensen and Kaprena Moore to discuss how couples can establish and maintain healthy boundaries in their relationships. They explain what boundaries look like in marriage, why they’re important, and how to effectively communicate them. Boone and Kaprena share real-life examples and provide tips on dealing with common boundary issues, including emotional safety, parenting, and handling conflicts. The episode highlights how boundaries can foster love, respect, and protection, rather than control.   About Boone & Kaprena: Boone and Kaprena own Steps Family Therapy in Spanish Fork, where they conduct individual, couple, and family therapy. They both performed qualitative research in graduate school on the role of clergy in mental health and relational issues. When not doing therapy or spending time with their two kids, Boone loves camping, fishing, and reading research on therapist development. Kaprena loves planning events, writing music, and yoga. They are both consultants for the mental health company, Mindless. Insights: Boone: "I'd say boundaries are the things you do to protect yourself and keep yourself healthy. They are nothing that you expect anybody else to do anything about." Kaprena: "When boundaries are about changing and manipulating your partner, they are poisonous. When they are about protecting yourself, they can convey love." Liz: "I think boundaries really are about safety. It's not just my feelings, but my partner's feelings. I just I do think of a cocoon a little bit when I think of a boundary or fenced in area where we're both inside, and it's not about the rupture, it's about making room for both of us." Dave: "I think that the boundaries perhaps can change. Is that possible over time? Is more understanding and his development and his relationship changes, still to have protection, but there may not be boundaries now we're okay. We need to adjust this. If I have a child that's living at home, or if there's a an accident or mental health or struggles or things okay, we need to adjust the boundaries here of what's happening to keep that protection in place." Links: https://stepsfamilytherapy.blogspot.com YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@boonechristianson Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/therapy_with_boone_lmft/?hl=en   Visit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways:  Strongermarriage.org  Podcast.stongermarriage.org  Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/strongermarriage/  Facebook Marriage Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/770019130329579  Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/strongermarriagelife/    Dr. Dave Schramm:  http://drdaveschramm.com  http://drdavespeaks.com    Dr. Liz Hale:  http://www.drlizhale.com  

    Learning To Manage & Love Motherhood | Rachel Nielson | #101

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 7, 2024 39:47


    In this episode of Stronger Marriage Connection, Dr. Dave Schramm and Dr. Liz Hale sit down with Rachel Nielson, host of the podcast Three in 30 Takeaways for Moms. Rachel opens up about her personal journey through motherhood, from the struggles of balancing expectations to finding joy in her role. She shares insights from therapy, practical strategies for decluttering your mental and emotional space, and ways to set healthy boundaries. Rachel also discusses how couples can support one another in parenting and offers actionable steps to bring more joy into motherhood and family life. About Rachel Nielson: 3 in 30 Takeaways for Moms is a podcast hosted by Rachel Nielson, a lover of practical ideas, conversations with kindred spirits, and her two wild miracle children who keep life interesting. After a long fight to become a mother through adoption and IVF, Rachel truly believed that she would thrive as a mom from day one. Her transition into motherhood was a little bumpier than she had imagined, and she sought the help of professionals for actionable advice.   3 in 30 is for moms who are short on time and brain space. In each 30-minute episode, Rachel and her guests share three actionable takeaways to help you be less overwhelmed and more self-assured in your motherhood. Rachel covers a wide variety of topics– from emotional resilience, to productivity and time management tips, to talking to your kids about racism, disability, mental health, and so much more.   Insights: Rachel: "The key for me has been the realization that I can examine my thoughts and choose thoughts that are more helpful and uplifting and empowering and make me feel like the best version of myself." Dave: "There are many ways to be a good mom." Liz: "I love that first step of cleaning out, decluttering the motherhood closet. I'm not a mother, but I certainly have a clutter closet in my mind, the brain dump and listing all the should" Links: 3in30Podcast   Visit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways:  Strongermarriage.org  Podcast.stongermarriage.org  Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/strongermarriage/  Facebook Marriage Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/770019130329579  Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/strongermarriagelife/    Dr. Dave Schramm:  http://drdaveschramm.com  http://drdavespeaks.com    Dr. Liz Hale:  http://www.drlizhale.com  

    Dr. Christian and Dr. Caroline Heim | Resilience Makes Marriage Last | #100

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 30, 2024 53:47


    Dr. Dave Schramm and Dr. Liz Hale welcome renowned marriage experts, Dr. Christian Heim and Dr. Caroline Heim, from Australia. They discuss insights from the largest global study on long-term relationships, revealing the key elements that make marriages last. The conversation highlights the importance of commitment, altruism, and shared values while addressing the challenges of hyper-individualism, social isolation, and mental health struggles. Whether you're single, married, or in a long-term relationship, this episode offers invaluable tools and perspectives to strengthen your relationship. #marraigeadvice #resilience #marraigeresilience #makingmarriagework About: Christian Heim FRANZCP, PhD is a psychiatrist, a Clinical Director in Mental Health Services, Senior Lecturer in the School of Medicine at the University of Queensland and a Churchill Fellow. Christian gives keynotes internationally on preventative mental health. In private psychiatry, he subspecializes in war-related and severe childhood sexual trauma, and couple therapy where mental illness is prominent. Christian publishes books and journal articles in the area of preventative mental health. His latest book was co-authored with Caroline Heim: Resilient Relationships: techniques for surviving hyper-individualism, social isolation and a mental health crisis. (Routledge, 2023). Caroline Heim is an Associate Professor at Queensland University of Technology. She has published two books in theatre studies and is a global authority on the psychology of relationships in the theatre. Caroline gives keynotes internationally and her numerous articles cover various topics from audiences to the mental health of university students. Specialising in empirical research, she has interviewed over 300 people internationally. Before entering academia, Caroline studied theatre and worked in New York winning a Drama League Award. Insights: Christian: "it doesn't matter how you do it. There are different ways to do things however your relationship works, is the way that your relationship works. Don't feel that you've got to find a formula, but the key to me is that your relationship is your greatest asset, and that means that it'll take some nurturing, it'll take some investment, it'll take time, energy and effort, but gosh, it's worthwhile." Caroline: "'I'd say probably, is altruism, our second finding. Because, as I said, it's not much in the literature. And these couples that put the others needs before there's I could see that they had, again, this strong connection. And. So as we said, it's hard to do that in a in a society that says that everything's got to be about me, and it's about my needs, and if I'm not getting what I want from this relationship, then I'm out of here. But as one, as many of the couples actually said it's much easier to walk away and then to stay and fight for your marriage, you and me against the world, basically." Dave: "At so many levels, I love this idea of, I'll call it search inward, turn outward. That's how I like to think of this searching or what are my values and what are our values, and then turning outward with that altruism and how, what can I do for my spouse or my partner today to make their day better? It's this outward mindset, really, of thinking about the we rather than the me. I haven't heard that term hyper individualism, but man, I think that's, that's spot on. I feel like that's like the number one killer in relationships today." Liz: "You know what I'm really happy to hear Caroline and Christian say is that has benefited their marriage, because this five year study, I doubt there was a lot of income they were getting from this study. There was a lot of giving and listening and noting, and so I'm so pleased that there was this flip effect of blessing your own marriage. Really happy to hear that for you and another takeaway, I mean, one of my favorite events with the recent Olympic Olympics was synchronized diving, and I never thought about it to go for the gold. That the more difficult, the more points, the more opportunity for gold. I thought that was just brilliant." Links: Resilient Relationships Dr. Christian Heim   Visit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways:  Strongermarriage.org  Podcast.stongermarriage.org  Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/strongermarriage/  Facebook Marriage Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/770019130329579  Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/strongermarriagelife/    Dr. Dave Schramm:  http://drdaveschramm.com  http://drdavespeaks.com    Dr. Liz Hale:  http://www.drlizhale.com  

    Helping Women Have Better Marriages | Maggie Reyes | #99

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 23, 2024 36:29


    In this episode of Stronger Marriage Connection, Dr. Dave Schramm and Dr. LizHale chat with Maggie Reyes, a master certified life coach and marriage mentor. Maggie shares five powerful questions that women can use to improve their marriages, without needing their partner to change. These questions help women shift their mindset, engage their emotional intelligence, and create positive change in their relationships. Maggie emphasizes the importance of understanding our emotions, managing expectations, and grieving unmet hopes while building strong, lasting connections. Learn how asking the right questions can transform your marriage and empower you as a partner. About Maggie: Maggie Reyes is a Master Certified Life Coach and Modern Marriage Mentor who specializes in helping driven, ambitious women create their best marriages, without waiting for their partners to change or adding more work to their lives. She is the creator of The Marriage MBA Program, a 6 month mentorship in creating a successful marriage using principles from positive psychology, cognitive science and simple coaching tools that you can learn today and apply tomorrow. Maggie is the author of the best selling Questions for Couples Journal which has over 3,000 4 star ratings on Amazon. And she is the host of the The Marriage Life Coach Podcast which is consistently ranked among the top 2 percent podcasts out of over 2 million podcasts tracked by ListenNotes. When she isn’t teaching or coaching she loves obsessing over Formula 1 Racing, Bridgerton, reading fan fiction, sexy romance novels and watching superhero movies and Mexican Rom Coms with her hubby. Insights: Maggie: "That you have choices, that you can think about what you want in your relationship and then take positive forward action towards that. I think that's the core of everything that I teach. And if someone is listening to us today and feeling frustrated or feeling sad, if I could just be that voice in your ear that says you have choices." Dave: "I'm going to actually combine both of your takeaways. I love that generosity Liz and the choices Maggie. I often call this, and it's been re iterated today. I think a challenge of lifetime. There are probably many challenges of lifetime. One of the those who stuck my mind lately, and it relates to what we're talking about today, is feeling disappointed, feeling feeling stressed, feeling worried, feeling irritated, even feeling angry, all those right, natural emotions we're going to feel those in our relationships. I believe this is difficult. That's why it's the challenge of a lifetime to feel all of that and still be kind, and still be generous." Liz: "That generosity is the highest form of love, being generous. And like you said, sometimes it doesn't, life doesn't call for that, right? But I think, especially in love and in marriage, generosity is often, I think, the call of the day. So I love that." Links: https://maggiereyes.com/   Visit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways:  Strongermarriage.org  Podcast.stongermarriage.org  Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/strongermarriage/  Facebook Marriage Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/770019130329579  Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/strongermarriagelife/    Dr. Dave Schramm:  http://drdaveschramm.com  http://drdavespeaks.com    Dr. Liz Hale:  http://www.drlizhale.com  

    Overcoming The Trauma of Betrayal | Crystal Hollenbeck | #98

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 16, 2024 39:46


    In this episode of the Stronger Marriage Connection, Dr. Dave Schramm and Dr. Liz Hale welcome betrayal trauma expert Dr. Crystal Hollenbeck to discuss the emotional complexities and recovery strategies for betrayal trauma. The conversation dives into the impact of betrayal, particularly the intense anger experienced by the betrayed partner, and how to navigate the healing process. Dr. Hollenbeck outlines therapeutic techniques, including her self-regulation model, and discusses why many partners remain in relationships post-betrayal. This episode is filled with practical advice, research-backed insights, and hope for those struggling to overcome the devastating effects of betrayal in relationships. About: Dr. Crystal Hollenbeck is a Betrayal Trauma Specialist and helps couples heal the wounds ofbetrayal trauma. Her article recently published in the Journal of Sex and Marital Therapyprovides recommendations for clinicians to help betrayed partners manage the complexity ofbetrayal trauma anger. Her book entitled, "Betrayal Trauma Anger: You are not crazy, you areangry, and you should be" is coming soon. Crystal is a Licensed Mental Health Counselor and a Florida State Qualified Supervisor for those seeking a license in Mental Health Counseling or Marriage and Family Therapy. In addition, she is also a Certified Professional Life Coach. Being a Therapist and a Life Coach gives her the unique ability to help clients heal from the past and live their best life today. Her approach to counseling and coaching is non-judgmental, caring, and solution focused. She believes counseling and coaching are an essential part of a person’s ability to live the life they desire and she strives to provide a counseling setting where you can feel safe to work through the difficulty you are facing with hope. Dedicating her life to helping others as a therapist andcoach is a result of post traumatic growth from her own personal life experiences. Insights: Crystal - "Betrayal is a devastating injustice. And although you're going to feel like you're crazy, you're not crazy, you're angry and you should be." Dave - "I think the take home for me, at least one of the many, is that avoiding that self-blame, it's that all of a sudden that inward right and anger, anger turns this inward, and then it's some of this, you know, maybe outward at first, but then it's this inward of what? What did I do? Am I not skinny enough? Why? Why did they do kind of searching for the why and then blaming themselves for this? I love that message." Liz - "I've never heard the great advice around self-harm regarding using an ice cube, rubber band, rubber band, I've heard, but Ice Cube I haven't. I really love both of those, actually. So, thank you for that. Because as I get that, I get that you're just trying to use access to physical pain to release the emotional pain. Makes perfect sense, actually, but harmful. We're just continuing the on the harm, so we have to stop, and I really appreciate you bringing that to our attention." Links: https://crystalhollenbeck.com/   Visit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways:  Strongermarriage.org  Podcast.stongermarriage.org  Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/strongermarriage/  Facebook Marriage Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/770019130329579  Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/strongermarriagelife/    Dr. Dave Schramm:  http://drdaveschramm.com  http://drdavespeaks.com    Dr. Liz Hale:  http://www.drlizhale.com  

    Emotion Focused Therapy and Our Inner Critic | Dr. Debi Gilmore | #97

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 9, 2024 39:47


    In this episode of Stronger Marriage Connection, hosts Dr. Dave Schramm and Dr. Liz Hale sit down with Dr. Debi Gilmore, a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, to discuss Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT). Dr. Gilmore shares insights into how EFT helps couples strengthen their emotional bonds, navigate pain, and foster connection. She also offers practical tips couples can use to improve their relationships, including the “Four Mantras of Love” and the “ARE” model (Accessible, Responsive, Engaged). This episode is packed with strategies to help couples rediscover connection and navigate challenges in their relationships. About Dr. Debi Gilmore: Dr. Debi Gilmore is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, public speaker, professional educator, author, and co-owner of The EFT Counseling and Education Center, a large mental health clinic specializing in couples therapy serving Utah, Idaho, Wyoming, Nevada, and Arizona. Debi trains therapists seeking licensure or certification as an Emotionally Focused Therapist. She is co-founder and developer of the Building A Lasting Connection™ and Lasting Connection System™ mats. The Building A Lasting Connection™ (BLC) relationship program is based on her doctoral dissertation focused on premarital education. The Lasting Connection System™ mats and BLC program are being used by therapists and workshop facilitators across the world. Insights: Debi: "The takeaway is I need to be better. I need to listen more intently, I need to love more abundantly, and I need to forgive more swiftly. So I'm going to say what I'm taking away is I will apply those things to myself." Dave: "I love acronyms. It's the R, the A, R, E, is it? Make sure I got to write the accessible, responsive and engaged." Liz: "It's really a combination of what the two of you have both talked about, I love that. What's the glory in your story? Dave, that's so beautiful. And for Debbie to suggest, when she first sits down with a couple, is to say, tell me about the first time you saw her. Tell me about the first time you saw him. For any of us to really go back in time, whether we've been married a year, 10 years, 30 years, 50 years, to remember those earlier times. They're precious, right? And they're powerful at the same time." Debi Gilmore’s Resources:www.drdebigilmore.com www.eftcounseling.orgInstagram: thttps://www.instagram.com/the_love.therapist/?hl=enFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/degilmo/LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/drdebigilmore/   Visit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways:  Strongermarriage.org  Podcast.stongermarriage.org  Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/strongermarriage/  Facebook Marriage Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/770019130329579  Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/strongermarriagelife/    Dr. Dave Schramm:  http://drdaveschramm.com  http://drdavespeaks.com    Dr. Liz Hale:  http://www.drlizhale.com  

    Christian St. Jacques | Healing Male Childhood Trauma |

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 2, 2024 49:36


    Debunking Common Myths About Sexuality: What The Science Really Says | Dean Busby | #95

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 26, 2024 69:26


    This episode of the Stronger Marriage Connection Podcast, Dean Busby joins Dave and Liz to discuss common myths about human sexuality and what the science really says. Ranging from gender differences, religious stereotypes, and sexual experience. Dean Busby covers it all here. About: Dean M. Busby, Ph.D. is a professor in the School of Family Life at Brigham Young University. He received his Ph.D. in Family Therapy from Brigham Young University. Following his schooling he taught at Syracuse University and Texas Tech University, where he was the department chair, before returning to Brigham Young University. He is a published author of books, book chapters, and research articles in the area of marriage relationships, sexuality, assessment of couples, and relationship trauma. His research has garnered university and national awards and been funded by federal and state grants. Dr. Busby has taught at the university level for more than thirty years, primarily in the area of dating and marriage relationships, sexuality, and research methods. His courses are popular and well-received. Dr. Busby has been married for 40 years and he and his wife Colleen are the parents of three sons and the grandparents of 10 grandchildren. Insights: Dean - “Start talking about sexuality; in your families and in your relationships. There isn’t a semester that goes by where I don’t cry with a student about the damage that has been done to their lives because a parent has felt like, “we can’t talk about that because that means they might experiment with it.” So they have had very difficult and unnecessary experiences just because of basic levels of ignorance. You have to stat talking to your kids. Fathers in-particular have to start doing a better job. They are the worst in the whole family as to who talks the least about sexuality -and they need to be in the middle of this conversation; for so many reasons that we know from research. Start talking with your children. Help them to feel comfortable that you are a trusted place to come and have a conversation about these bodies that they have and what’s going on with them." Liz - "“The sexual debut. How important that is for the man and the woman. What this responsibility is for us as parents – to talk to our young people about the expectations of that. Ladies first, we really base our sexual experience on the woman and that is such a responsibility for men; for their patience and their turning towards a woman. And, a woman also has a responsibility to ready herself for love making. So we both have responsibilities in this wonderful cycle of life and sexuality.” Dave - "“There is hope in any relationship if people – create a safe space and open up and communicate regardless of time passed.” Dean’s Key To A Stronger Marriage Connection: “You can’t change another person, you can only invite them to be in a relationship with the better you.” If you want to move your relationship, move yourself, then your partner because they love you, they will move with you. You can’t do it by pushing them in a particular direction, it just doesn’t work. " Links: google scholar; https://scholar.google.com/citations?user=YAThg_4AAAAJ&hl=en Chelom Leavitt; https://chelomleavitt.com   Visit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways:  Strongermarriage.org  Podcast.stongermarriage.org  Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/strongermarriage/  Facebook Marriage Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/770019130329579  Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/strongermarriagelife/    Dr. Dave Schramm:  http://drdaveschramm.com  http://drdavespeaks.com    Dr. Liz Hale:  http://www.drlizhale.com    

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